my heart rate has been 200bpm for 2 hours straight and now i remembered that this is phil's 15th birthday with dan . This is the end for me
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König eats a Taki and fucking dies
This is a crack fic so it's not serious. Also I'm sleep deprived so not proof read
TW: goofy fic, but does mention death and murder, smuggling, crimes.
You and König were good friends on the KorTac base. You had been on many missions together, endured pain and suffering as one. You both were almost siblings.
And with siblings..they do pranks. Lots of them.
You had managed to smuggle in a bag of Takis. Not a big bag, like you had hoped, but enough for a little snack.
As you sat down, ready to eat your chips, you noticed königs food... yikes. It looked like straight slop from a pig trough. You felt bad. Maybe you could share your little bag.
"Hey könig. Want some?" You'd ask, walking to his side of the table and sitting close to him. He smiled when you walked over, welcoming you. Hello [name]. He looked down at the bag, curiosity appearing in his stare. What's zhat? you put one into his hand. "It's a Taki. You should try it." You giggled, watching his mask lift and him eating the chip....
And his eyes blew wide. Incoherent babbling of broken German spewed out of his mouth, trying to chug some of your water that you had, but that didn't help. Seconds later, he was on the floor.
König had killed people his size and possibly bigger than him with ease. He had crafted masterful plans to defeat powerful crime organizations, but he was beaten by a Taki. 😞 😔
What even is this 😭
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Adoption poll preliminary match 8
victorian child (the “This would kill a Victorian child” meme)
Edward Elric (Fullmetal Alchemist)
Shilo Bathroy (Just Roll With It)
Only two can move on!
Propaganda under the cut
victorian child Propaganda
everybody keeps thinking of substances or experiences that would kill them and as a historian I am very concerned. I'm going to adopt the victorian child and make sure they have 3 good meals a day, nice colourful clothes and never have to work in a factory.
Edward Elric (Fullmetal Alchemist) Propaganda
Feral child left to take care of himself and his brother at a young age. Cannot stop uncovering government corruption
Shilo Bathroy (Just Roll With It) Propaganda
HE JUST LOOKS LIKE A LITTLE WET CAT YOUD FIND ON THE STREET AND BE INCLINED TO ADOPT he has no dad and a super evil vampire mom, no friends, he seriously just needs to be wrapped up in a warm blanket and told he “did a good job today, champ”
Pollrunner note: it took me an hour to find anything about this character because google wasn’t showing me anything. Turns out he’s from a series that had released its first episode like the day he was submitted. “Just roll with it: the suckening” an actual play vampire the masquerade series on YouTube. I watched the first episode and it’s very good.
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He looks like a frail Victorian child who does not know the meaning of the word protein
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it's been 2 years since grymforge was added to bg3 but every time I post something about Nere here on tumblr or on youtube, people still comment "wait what? I had no idea you can save this guy" and "how do you get this option?" and I explain step by step every time. I guess this is protecting a blorbo since day 1 lmao your online guide for keeping the victorian child alive against all odds
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i’m pretty sure that 95% of what comes out of my mouth would kill a victorian child
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*COUGH COUGH*
Sorry missus, I've been plagued with this comsumption for o'er three years now..
There lit'l joy in a live spent bed'riden yep.
There would be only one great joy in my life. That would be a boop madam.
If one of your people could just get me a boop, that would be splendid.
*COUGH COUGH*
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This would instantly kill a Victorian child
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I'm in a course that covers American literature and history during the 1800s (19th century) and here in 'Murica, this upcoming Monday is Presidents' Day, meaning that I as an American college student have no classes tomorrow.
I'm currently reading The Scarlet Letter for class and all I can hear is Hawthorne weeping in his grave.
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I know it's not really a debate anymore but every time I remember those posts about how "victorian children wouldn't survive x", "victorian children would be decimated by y" I also remember that victorian children drank morphine, cannabis, alcohol, chloroform and called it cough syrup. If we ever met a victorian child I think we should be the ones to be fucking scared.
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"victorian child couldn't handle this, couldn't handle that" a victorian child could drain a disposable vape in half an hour thank you for your time
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just wanted to share my mood for this weekend: victorian sulky child
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