Vivi and Oak visiting Elfhame:
Vivi: We’re here! Heather couldn’t make it; she lost her aunt yesterday, so she wanted to stay behind.
Cardan: Well did she find her?
Jude and Cardan in the mortal world:
Jude:(getting arrested and searched)
Jude: Well how was I meant to know carrying an dagger is illegal?! What kind of woman doesn’t carry a dagger?!
Officer:(points at Cardan) You were holding it up to his throat.
Cardan: (shrugs) It’s fine officer, she was just flirting. It’s kind of our thing. Oh, there’s another in her boot.
A moment of silence for Sophie, the mortal girl that Jude and Vivi tried to save but ultimately couldn’t save from herself.
The fandom @ Taryn:
Cardan: I’m bored. My darling jude, would you like to tell me a joke?
Cardan: ha! Good one.
Jude- ‘Cus I’m the queen of the castle, get down you dirty rascal.
Cardan - I think we can all agree I’m the ten amongst these threes
I look more rad than Lutheranism
Taryn - Her or me, chum, don’t wanna be some girl in a threesome, are you blind?
The Bomb - Not very prim and proper, can’t make me stop
Locke - Now I ain’t sayin’ I’m a gold digger, but check my prenup, and go figure
Nicasia - You know it isn’t true but I must say to you that I don’t need your love, no, no
Madoc - When I get bored, I go to court
Oriana - Have my golden rule got to keep my cool
Heather - You’re just so full of sh-, must think that I’m naive
The Ghost - I didn’t mean to hurt anyone
The Roach - You’ll find that I’m unshakeable
Oak - Politics, not my thing
Orlagh - A restless tide, untamable
Grima Mog - I wanna go hunting, any takers?
Cardan: Aww my wife still misses me! But at least her aim is starting to improve.
I was bitching on discord and @booksandlewks gave me her braincells and reminded me that HCs exist so here you go.
•it happened at a revel, about six months after the dust had settled
•(yknow after the whole snake incident? Yeah…)
•Heather and Vivi had been visiting a ton so they’d have an excuse to avoid Madoc
•Since he was endlessly dropping in and bothering them
•the revel was outside, dying down as night bled into morning
•Jude was on Cardan’s lap
•(it was disgustingly domestic)
•Taryn was REALLY pregnant
•(like ready to pop any day)
•Cardan was happy drunk
•(can you blame him?? Jude was in his lap)
•Vivi was chilling, completely unaware of her girlfriends turmoil
•Heather. Was. Losing. It.
•the whole night
•the whole FUCKING night
•she’d been sat within earshot of the most annoying
•full of himself
•and he’d noticed her. Noticed that she was human. Noticed that she was (at Vivi’s insistence) avoiding dancing
•and he’d been waxing poetic about fae music
•shit like “oh you mortals will never understand what it’s like to listen to a song with the delicate ear of a faerie” or “it must be excruciatingly difficult for you to avoid the dance floor, I know our tunes are all but irresistible to you lesser humans”
•it had been like 5 god damn hours
•Heather had long since put down her wine glass to keep from shattering it against his head
•she’d had to stop even glancing to the right, because that’s where the dance floor was
•and he would see it
•and start commenting again
•then, finally, he made his crucial mistake
•”it must be fascinating to you, knowing that we can make songs that can force you to dance, even if you don’t wish to”
•and she snapped
•”SO DOES ABBA, YOU DIPSHIT. YOURE NOT SPECIAL”
•it was deafening
•her scream ripped through the revel
•the (oh so wonderful) music ground to a strange halt
•people turned to where the human was now on her feet, yelling at a (seemingly cowed) faerie
•”I MEAN WHAT THE FUCK MAN. WHY WOULD I BE IMPRESSED BY YOUR FIFTEENTH CENTURY BULLSHIT WHEN DOLLY PARTON EXISTS. WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TO THINK YOURE BETTER THAN DOLLY PARTON. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE. “
•she decided his name was Flutterballs
•”YOU THINK YOUR SPECIAL, HUH FLUTTERBALLS? CAN YOUR DISCOUNTED GUITAR PLAY JOLENE? NO IT CANT FLUTTERBALLS. YOU AINT GOT SHIT ON DOLLY PARTON”
•Cardan was cackling
•Even Jude was grinning
•Heather started imitating Flutterballs
•”OOOH WOOH LOOK AT ME IM FLUTTERBALLS I HAVE A LYYYYYYRRE I CAN PLUCK STRIIIIIIINGS.”
•”YOU KNOW WHAT I CAN DO FLUTTERBALLS? I CAN TURN THE HEADS OF EVERY MORTAL IN A GENERATION WITH ONE FUCKING PIANO NOTE”
•”DO YOU KNOW WHAT A PIANO IS FLUTTERBALLS? NO? IS THAT TOO NEW AGE FOR YOU? NOT AS TOE TAPPING AS YOUR FUCKING LYRE?”
•”YOU THINK YOUR MUSIC MAKES ME SHAKE MY ASS THE SAME WAY THAT DANCING QUEEN DOES?”
•”YOU THINK YOUR LYRE CAN HOLD A GOD DAMNED CANDLE TO THE TRANSCENDENT EXPERIENCE THAT IS BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY?”
•Vivi’s jaw was on the fucking ground as Heather kept going
•”I MEAN FUCK THE GALL OF THIS MAN. DO YOU HEAR THIS SHIT VIVIENNE? HOW DARE THEY THINK THAT THEIR MUSIC IS BETTER! WE MOVED PAST THIS SHIT FIVE CENTURIES AGO!”
•the whole revel watched as Heather picked up her wine glass just to smash it on the ground
•she then turned back to Flutterballs
•who looked terrified
•threw him the finger
•and stormed back to the palace
•still loudly grumbling about the audacity of the bullshit
•Jude was doing damage control
•(making sure Heather didn’t get glamoured into fucking oblivion)
•Cardan was STILL cackling
•Vivi (since she moved past the surprise) agreed with every damn thing Heather said
•finally someone said it
Can you tell I’m annoyed by how in the books/fics the fae have this obvious “oh we’re better than humans oh our stuff is magical and better ooooh we can make you dance and never stop” bitch so does ABBA this ass don’t stop when Dancing Queen comes on and thats that on that
Tag list: @cardan-greenbriar-tcp @hizqueen4life @slightlyrebelliouswriter23 @thewickedkings @aelin-queen-of-terrasen @cheekycheekycheeks @queen-of-glass @b00kworm @doingmyrainbow @andromeddea @jurdanhell @thesirenwashere @illyrianwitchling @courtofjurdan @clockworkgraystairs @st00pid231 @booksandlewks @fateandluminary @addies-invisible-life @nahthanks
— JUDE DUARTE | THE FOLK OF THE AIR
“The odd thing about ambition is this: You can acquire it like a fever, but it is not so easy to shed.”
edit by rhosyne ©️
Vivienne Duarte, 4/?
Jude and Cardan in the mortal world
Jude: Gets hurt doing something dumb.
Jude: (weakly) Cardan, call me an ambulance!
Cardan: (confused) umm ok?
Cardan: (clears throat) Jude, you are an ambulance.
Jude Duarte // Taryn Duarte // Vivienne Duarte
The Three Sisters of the Two Worlds, 3/?
Cardan: you existence is so confusing
Jude: how so?
Cardan: your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to you upsets me
The Folk of the Air Series x Iconic Designer Collections: Michael Cinco “The Impalpable Dream of the Maharaja” F/W 2017…
I. The Cruel Prince
II. The Wicked King
III. The Queen of Nothing
IV. How the King of Elfhame Learned to Hate Stories
Cardan: I have an idea-
Roach, eyes wide: What?
Cardan: I said I have an idea-
Bomb, jaw hanging open: I’ll call Jude…
Bomb, on call with Jude: Yeah something is wrong… I don’t know… I’ll ask.
Bomb: Have you been drinking… water?
Jude: Hurry up, Vivi, I have ten different meetings I need to be at.
Taryn: Me and vivi were just wondering…
Vivienne: So Cardan’s tail… does it… affect certain aspects… of your relationship?
Jude: Oh my God-
Cardan: I just wish-
Jude: To die?
Cardan: …Why are you like this?