#volatilearcane

[silcoseye]

P8: It's Just a Burning Memory

info: "It's been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8

info: THE FINAL PART KAJNSHHIJDILADKFJKDSNM THIS IS THE LONGEST FANFIC I HAVE EVER WRITTEN AND FINISHED SO THIS IS VERY BIG FOR ME!! Writing this was delightful, seeing so many people across platforms enjoy this work so much and validate my writing was so beautiful <3 you are all amazing people. Thank you thank you thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed my writing! Happy reading!!

WARNINGS: smoking, suggested PTSD, trauma, depression, mental health struggles

5689 words

The next few weeks were dedicated to your healing, and for a pleasant amount of that time, Silco joined your side. Considering all the time he dedicated to changing your bandages, checking in with you as well as keeping you company, you had a sneaking suspicion he truly did care for you. Perhaps more than you had let yourself believe. People change, after all. Time changes them. Perhaps the water had changed him too? On one hand it had transformed him into a man seeking revenge on the world that wronged him, in the other perhaps it made him realize the worth of those who cared for him?

Jinx visits were occasional- with all the free time she suddenly had, and considering you weren't 'fit' for teaching her, it needed to be filled. You'd hear plenty of tales from Silco of finding his office (pleasantly, though he wouldn't admit it) vandalized with bright neon drawings and 'Jinx was Here' scribbled in the most obvious places. What followed would be the stories of him having to explain to his buissness associates and the Chem Barons the reason they were there- which all caused you to laugh  At your laughter, he'd smile, lean back in his chair, and mention he needed to get new wallpaper in his office anyway. 

When Silco had a job to do- after all, his newfound duty as the Eye of Zaun kept him busy- he would drop Jinx off for you to look after, as he had promised. Your lessons resumed, much to his distaste and protests. Her skills had to be perfected, and you couldn't exactly do anything but lay in your bed and let your body heal itself. Though, by his request, not all her time was spent learning. Those same blue swirls began flooding the pages of her sketchbooks and arms in the forms of blue paint, pencils, or whatever she could get her hands on. She appeared fixated upon them. In fact, sometimes you'd let her use your own arms as her canvases, eager to see her chaotic designs on your body. It made for a more interesting time

Finally when your body had healed, and you were declared fine by the doctor, you were allowed to leave the room. Silco insisted you do not work just yet, but the longer you stayed in his home with nothing to occupy your time with, the more bored and useless you felt. Luckily, Jinx's company proved delightful once again, and now that you were out of bed, the activities you could both get up to were endless. Baking at anytime to surprise Silco, helping her put up her drawings, entertaining her with small chemical reactions and experiments in his kitchen- and maybe accidentally destroying parts of it in the process.

Perhaps in a small, selfish part of your head, this is what you always longed for. Perhaps the adventures you shared in your childhood and teenage years where enough- they brought their excitement, but as you grew up, you privatly dreamed of a more relaxed life. A more... domestic, if you will. 

Every morning, you'd wake at relatively the same time and brew some coffee for both you and Silco- yours to your liking, and his strong and black- while fixing Jinx whatever breakfast she desired that day, along with a hot or cold chocolate. You'd chat together in the kitchen: sometimes about your day; sometimes about a dream you had' sometimes you'd speek with Jinx as well... And sometimes, you would stand together in a comfortable, yet tired, silence. Then Silco would leave for work and return home for lunch or dinner, which had either been brought or made by you and your d-

His daughter. 

But you could dream... 

"I decided to spend my evening with you, (Y/N)," Silco announced, barely glancing up over his newspaper. This was one of your more silent mornings- Jinx was sleeping in instead of pounding on either one of your doors and whining that she was hungry. This was his fourth sip of coffee, and the second thing he said to you today. Usually, he only spoke after his fifth sip,

"Oh?" He hummed, nodding his head and continuing to drink the coffee, engrossed in the paper before him. You hummed back, moving from where you finished drying the dishes from last night and placing them on the drying rack, "Is there any special occasion I'm unaware of?" You mused, folding your arms over your chest as you turned to face him. He glanced up at you, quirking a brow,

"When was the last time you left the house?"

"A while ago- but only because you'd forbid me from leaving," You smiled, walking towards the table he was sitting at and placing your hands on it. You watched him neatly fold up the newspaper, placing it back on the table with a sigh,

"You were healing," He said, watching you calmly, 

"Yeah, and I think I'm healed enough already,"

"Hmm... That's why I decided you deserved something nice after being stuck here for so long," He said, finishing the rest of his coffee and standing to clean his mug. Your smile brightened at his words, and you felt a happy warmth settle in your stomach at the idea of him thinking of you. You turned to face him,

"May I ask what this 'nice' thing is?" You asked. Once he finished washing the mug, he placed it on the drying rack and turned to look at you,  lips curved slightly into a smile,

"I think you'll have a good time," He assured, "It won't be like the last time we were together," He followed up fairly quickly, "I'll make sure something like that will never happen again," He said seriously to which you nodded,

"Of course," You nodded, "I'll make sure to be armed too and-"

"That won't be nessessary. I'll be with you the whole time," He said, holding up a hand, "I just need you to be ready by seven,"

"You'll be staying out that late?" You asked, and he sighed,

"I would have liked to take some more time off, especially for this, but I have too much work at the moment" He said. He sounded disappointed, "Considering Zaun and-"

"I understand," You smiled, nodding, "I look forward to our evening together," You told him,

"Good. I'm glad..." He trailed off, "Sevika agreed to take care of Jinx for the evening,"

"Did she agree or did you force her?" You teased, to which he exhaled a small amount of air in a laugh, "I knew she wouldn't willingly agree," You mused,

"You are in fact right," He sighed, "I did pay her a... Rather obnoxious babysitting fee," You laughed at that,

"Stars, guess you were pretty desperate, huh Silco?" You teased again, to which he rolled his eyes,

"You could say that," He sighed, "I'll see you later tonight?" He asked again,

"Mhm," You agreed with a nod, "Do I need to wear anything particular?"

"That coat I got you," As he saw the complaints already building in your head, he quickly hushed you, "Wear it, you haven't gotten the chance to yet," Since you spent your birthday bedridden, he had graciously bought you a new, incredibly expensive coat for the colder months. Although you loved it, you don't think you'd ever be used to owning such expensive articles of clothing- let alone wearing them in fear you'd damage them,

"It's way too expensive! What if I ruin it?" you protested,

"I'll buy you a new one," He retorted, "I'm heading off to work," He stated before you could continue arguing with him, "See you at seven,"

"See you at seven," You repeated, watching as he left. You sighed, putting a hand on a chair and getting lost in thought once the door shut behind him. All you knew was that it was just the two of you tonight, somewhere away from here- judging by the fact that he asked you to bring your coat. Maybe this was the perfect oppertunity for you to finally tell him how you feel? Oh, Stars. You'd have to confess your true feelings. Through these last few months you spent inside his home, in his presence, you felt a multiple opportunities to say something. Unfortunatly, your anxiety always had you coming up short and stuttering out some stupid thing that made him laugh or look at you worriedly. Some small part of you believed he maybe loved you as you did him; a larger part of you figured he was only doing it out of friendship. You hoped the latter to be true but you had no way of telling unless you asked. Mentally, you decided that this was it. Regardless of the outcome, you had totell him tonight. If he rejected you, you'd simply acknowledge and move on... How long that'd take or if that was even possible, you only dreaded to find out.

With a small sigh, you dropped your head. Tonight. Tonight. You'd tell him tonight. Tonight, tonight, tonight. Glancing at the clock told you seven was still hours from now. What would you do between then and now to occupy the time? As you stood there pondering, your eyes widened. Silence was never a good thing in this house- knowing Jinx, it meant she was up to something,

"Stars not the walls again," You hissed to yourself as you practically sprinted to the young girl's room. You recalled a few incidents in the past- once you had found her carefully painting and drawing on her face in a mirror she had taken from your room and was covered in bright pinks and blues for days afterward. Once she had decided to do the same with her hair- it stayed pink for a few weeks. Once, you found she was quietly talking to herself. It intrigued you, and you decided to listen in through the crack of the door. This one-sided conversation she was seemingly having was normal- well... As normal as talking to one self when they were alone was- until there was  a prolonged silence. She stared ahead at a drawing she had made to commemorate her brother. His jagged features stood out to you, from his sharp chin and hair to his exaggerated sharp teeth and fangs. He looked sharp, ready to strike... Evil, maybe. It greatly surprising to you when Jinx, with a small gasp and whip of her twin braids, sprung up, yelling for the picture to shut up and ripping it to shreds with her small hands. 

You had ran into the room, gently snapping her out of this rage, slowing the tears flowing down her face and watching her face relax from its angry expression. She broke out into sobs, holding you tightly until you removed the shreds of paper from the room. You had taken her from the room and spent the day comforting her as best you could- painting together and baking. Though you could tell that morning's events had caused her mood to be off the entire day. She had asked you if she could go to sleep earlier that day, to which you agreed. You checked in on her occasionally, but ultimatly left her alone and let her have her space. Once Silco returned, you told him about these events, and learned that boy had been her sibling. He mentioned soon after the explosion they had returned to the location, trying to salvage any rememnants of the Shimmer Lab that had been destroyed and paying off the Piltover Guards to not alarm the city above. Considering he had no one he could trust to look after her, he brought her along to the location that had caused her so much pain. He had mentioned it was the explosion that killed them, but when she returned she was silent and stoic, finding cracked goggles that had belonged to another sibling of hers and allowing her to take them. It broke your heart to find her still so wounded by the events of that day, and you quickly found that snapping her out of this state and distracting her worked well in bringing her back to you as more incidents like this popped up. Ideally, you would want to speak with her about this, but you weren't sure how best to help her through this. 

You breathed heavily as you knocked on her door and entered quickly before anymore of... Whatever she got up to was happening. To your relief, she was only sat on the floor, doodling in blue marker on a sheet of paper,

"Good morning," She said, her usually chipper tone replaced by a monotone one, clearly focused on her innocent task. You sighed in relief, smiling at her,

"Morning, Jinx," You said, looking at the blue squiggles on the page, "What're you working on?" You asked curiously, trying to decipher her drawing. She stood, studying the page for a moment, before walking to a wall in her room so full of paper you could hardly see the wallpaper behind it. You watched her as she taped the drawing to the center, stood back and looked over it, judging her work,

"Just connecting everything," She said. You moved to stand near her, and similarly studied the drawing. The blue squiggles connected across the pages, sometimes disappearing behind drawings of animals like monkeys and bunnies- drawings you had grown accustomed to and associated with the child- as well as others. Faces of you, and Silco, cakes cupcakes, her various bomb designs and explosions, along with the word 'boom!' thrown in a few times,

"Hmm," You looked at the wall, "It's certainly more exciting than the dust bunny grey Silco's got," You smiled at her, and watched as she giggled at your comment, 

"I think so too," She said happily. You just had to accept that not every day would be happy like this for Jinx. You just had to show her you were there for her in any way she needed, and that with you and Silco, she would be alright.

By six-fifty, you were dressed and ready. Perhaps you were a little bit overexcited for tonight and got ready way too early- eager to spend time with Silco in a setting where he wasn't worrying over you, stuck in that boring room. Sevika had come about two hours ago and picked up Jinx, giving you a slight nod and glaring down at the girl. Jinx was hugging her art supplies close to her as she waved goodbye to you and dissapeared with the woman. Sevika particularly hated Jinx's doodles, so you made sure the young girl was armed to the teeth with her markers, crayons, colouring pencils, sharpeners, and her notebooks- in case one ran out of empty pages. You spent that time getting ready, showering, styling your hair and picking out an outfit. He hadn't exactly given you a dresscode and now that he had some say in it, your wardrobe was full of fancy and nice clothing. There's too much choice, you argued with him, only for a package full of more clothes to arrive at your door the next day. You glanced up from where you sat on the couch as Silco entered his home, and slid the coat he asked you to wear from the side of the couch where it rested. You stood and walked to greet him,

"I hope you don't mind I'm ready a little earlier than we agreed," You said, almost timidly, 

"No, no. It's rather alright," He said, his gaze flicking over you as you stood there for a moment, watching each other. Your cheeks flushed as you watched him take you in,

"Right," You broke the silence, "Should we go?" 

"Yes... Yes, let's," He said, turning to the door again. What surprised you was when he cleared his throat, causing you to turn and glance down at his outstretched arm. With a small 'oh' of understanding, you linked your arms together and exit the home, approaching a carriage waiting for you. He helped you in, before entering himself. Soon you were moving, "You've got the coat," He pointed out, smiling at you. You sat across from him and observed his tired features as he reached down into his inner pockets, pulling a small compact out and opening it. He gazed into the small mirror with his corrupted eye, and gently dabbed the puff with foundation over the rotting skin of his face where it had rubbed off during the day,

"How was work?" You deflected, leaning your head against the side of the carriage, enjoying the way it moved along the roads. With a heavy sigh, he spoke,

"Tiring. As usual," He said, "Believe me, I am more than happy to be relaxing here with you now, (Y/N)," Your smile widened at his comment,

"That true, old man?" You teased. He looked towards you over the mirror with a stare, at which you simply laughed. With a small smile, he shook his head and went back to dabbing at his face,

"Yes, it is," He said, placing the puff back face down into the foundation and shutting the compact, storing it away in his pockets. He produced a cigar from his pocket, lighting it with a match. Your eyes followed him as he leaned back into the blush seat, blowing a ring of smoke into the roof of the carriage. His shoes touched your own but you didn't dare move,

"Better now?" You spoke, a hint of playfulness in your tone,

"Certainly," He smiled,

"Care to tell me where we're headed now?" You asked, moving the curtain covering your window slightly to try see where you were. Deffinatly still in the lanes,

"You'll see," He said cryptically, "Have some patience, my dear,"

The carriage ride was calming, easy conversation flowing between you two until it came to a halt. By then, Silco had finished the cigar, and as he exited first, he dropped the butt to the floor and reached a hand out to you to help you get down. Softly, you thanked him and stepped out onto the murky street. The carriage pulled away, and you were alone. Alone. Just the two of you. No drunks or shimmer infested people wandering the streets. Just you and Silco in a small street of Zaun,

"Do you remember it?" He asked, eyes focused on the large building towering before you both. The shades  of grey and brown faded between each other in the bricks, weaving uneven ugly patterns. There were large cracks spreading through the weakened building, and many of the bottom windows had cracked glass or where simply boarded up. It was old, crumbling, and dilapidated. It looked like something you lived in once... A long time ago. You searched your brain for any remembrance in the building's bricks, struck by a chord of unknown nostalgia,

"No?" You say uncertainly, looking to him for any guidance. His lips simply turned up at the corners, and he glanced down at you amused, "Should I? I've got a terrible memory you know," You mentioned, watching his smile falter momentarily,

"Considering we lived here for a substantial amount of our youth I'd think so, yes," He said, looking back to the building. Your eyes widened and you turned your gaze forward in surprise. Of course. Although you never really stopped to stare at the place you once lived in, you began to feel the familiarity, eyes flicking up to the broken balcony and corregated roofs above, mouth falling open slightly. Your gaze fell, focusing on the door. The familiar shade of deep forest green broken by rivets of brown wood beneath the chipping paint held your attention. You remembered all the time's you and Silco would burst through it, either running in, or out and up to your floor. You also remembered how Vander would almsot always hit his head on the top of the door, being too large, and how hard you and Silco would laugh. You remembered how Vander took the door off the hinges after a particular game of cards where Silco and you had cheated him out of all his money. Without realising, you were slowly approaching the door with Silco,

"Right," You breathed slowly, gaze fixed on the door as you stood infront of it, "37," You pointed  at the bronze letters on the door with a small smile, "I remember now," You assured him, glancing up, "But why are we here exactly?" You asked quizzically,

"Sometimes, we need to visit those places from the past that once haunted us in order to move forward from them," He said, looking forward,

"Profound," You commented, making him look down at you, "I mean- it's very wise," You restated, smiling at him,

"Hmm," He hummed, before leading you inside. As you wove your way through the familiar thin corridors, your thoughts raced. This was the place where he had left you behind following Vander's betrayal and honestly, you had no clue how to feel. You still loved him just the same- he found you eventually, he care for you so much now. You felt as though your relationship was rekindled. You felt no malice or ill will towards him. So why were you so nervous? You considered his words: you were visiting a 'place from the past that once haunted' you and him. He said 'us'. There were a few unpleasant memories of cleaning eachother's wounds as aftermath's of won or lost fights, but that was about it. You'd already discussed Vander's betrayal, so what else could he possibly be referencing?

Your brain slowed and went blank as you entered your old bedroom. It was completely bare and empty, the multiple matresses and posters stripped from the walls. Void of any life and covered in a thin blanket of dust, all you could do is stare. It was fairly dark within the room, the only light coming from the dim one in the hall behind you, casting soft shadows into the ground. The only other light source was the open doorway to the balcony, casting warm shades of orange and pink. Mentally, you could still picture the large bed Silco and you shared each night, Sevika's corner, Vander's large bed... You felt yourself gravitating towards the balcony doorwar, walking slowly and trailing a hand against the thin walls, fingers catching on the multitude of cracks within the plaster. Once outside, you looked down over the street from where you had entered, noticing the same emptiness. It looked much more familliar from birds eye of view. Looking further upon Zaun, most of the lanes were obscured by various plumes of grey and yellow fog. The air was much cleaner up here. It always was,

"Shall we?" You heard Silco's smooth voice break the silence behind you. Turning, you found he had followed you, and stood near the wall, looking up with a longing to the roof, then back at you,

"You're like a cat, you know?" You teased, smiling as you approached him, careful of the broken fence beside you. He looked at you confused, "You like being up in tall places overlooking everything," At that he smiled, humming, and you watched him climb onto the corrugated roof like all those years before, with surprisingly similar agility. He helped you up with a firm grip on your hand and smoothed down his outfit once you were both up on your feet on the landing. You reminiced on all the times he had pulled you up to his level in the past. How many moments you both shared together. How many of those moments you held so close to your heart.

 As you walked forward slightly to admire the setting sun and the various splotches of pink, orange, and white covering the darkening blue of the sky behind them, Silco moved behind you. He removed the long black jacket he had been wearing and fixed his sleeves, rolling them up slightly. You turned to look at him, "I remember this now," You told him,

"That's a relief," He smiled to himself, pinning the sleeves back so they wouldn't move. You glanced back to the view with a smile. You moved forward, careful of the edge, and sat down. The landing here was smooth and concrete- safe as long as you stayed away from the edge,

"It's quiet here," You mentioned, looking down at your hands. Gently, you traced your burn scar with your fingers, and glanced over as his hand reached to yours, the scars touching. He had joined you, sitting besides you. The scars crossed over your hands, "Together forever," You hummed,

"It is," He confirmed. You glanced over to him to see a plume of smoke exit his thin lips, and his other hand passing you a cigarette. You smiled, taking it from him,

"Back to these?" You asked, to which he laughed dryly,

"No, no. Not really," He said, "I brought them just for you, actually," he admitted, causing your eyes to widen in surprise,

"Huh..." You exhaled, smoke rising into the air from between your own lips. Your head turned to the sky again, "Right. Because you're used to your fancy cigars," You said playfully, to which he nodded, "Smoke is smoke, Silco. Kills you no matter what the source is," You reminded,

"Look who's being profound and wise now," He said, letting go of your hand. You laughed to yourself, looking at the cigarette between your fingers. Although still just a cigarette, you recognized it to be a more fancy one. Likely from Piltover? Must have been imported by him. Just for you. That explained the change in taste. It didn't make you want to cough as badly as the Zaun cigs. Just for you. You hummed, cheeks reddening as you glanced back to him to speak, hoping to enact your plan, but finding yourself alone. Looking behind you confusedly you noticed a withered gramophone and Silco beside it with his back turned to you. Quickly stubbing out the cigarette on the floor you stood, quietly approaching him. 

He looked so relaxed and at ease, shoulders dropped as his long slender fingers slid over large vinyl covers in his hands, reading the titles. He pulled one from its sleeve, placing the black disc onto the board and turning the machine on. To your surprise, it began to smoothly spin, and when he placed the needle onto one of the rings, loud brassy jazz filled the air with a slight crackle. You recognised a melody from long before, both delightfully happy and unimaginably sad in its own way. Tinged with the nostalgia of older times. He then turned to look at you, standing beside the flower-like horn from where the music was coming from,

"May we...?" He trailed off. Your wide, glassy eyes snapped to him, mouth agape as the music continued to softly play beside you. He held a hand out for you to take, and with minimal hesitation, you did. 

For a moment, it was only you, Silco, and the music. The world faded away, your ears filled with the brass, your eyes only saw him. His hand went to your waist, gently holding on, and his hand was firmly holding yours. Your hand gently arched around his shoulder, and you both begun to slowly move to the melodies. Not even the gentle crackles interrupted your moment of peace. Dancing among the fading day's hues with a man you had loved for years. To you, there was no better way to spend your first, healthy day,

"If you'd told me this morning we'd be dancing on the roof of our old home together, I would have asked you if you had fallen ill," You admitted, unable to hide the bright smile on your lips beginning to make your cheeks ache. He laughed gently at your comment, tilting his head so he'd be closer to you,

"I knew you'd enjoy this, (Y/N)," He said with a smile, suddenly letting go of your waist and holding your joint hands above you, encouraging you to spin. With a surprised laugh, you did so, laughing as you unglamorously fell into him. Luckily, Silco's hands caught you, smiling as he sett you on your feet and continuing to dance. You moved together in a circle  until you were out of breath. You slowed to a stop with the song, holding his hands in yours tightly,

"Give me a moment," You said to him breathily. With a glance at the sky again, you sighed as you felt a gentle breeze swirling around you, cooling off the radiant heat on your skin. You realized he was watching you, awfully intensely, yet with a kind expression on his features, "What?" You asked,

"I didn't bring you here just to dance," He admitted in a low voice, "Though it has been something I wanted to do with you for a while," He admitted, eyes not meeting yours momentarily, "(Y/N), I've been... Meaning to talk to you for a long time about this," Your heart dropped at his words, and you watched him expectantly now. The record stopped momentarily, only to start again. The same jazzy melody filled the air as Silco took a deep breath to ready himself, 

"(Y/N)," He began, eyes meeting yours and holding your gaze "I care for you... Deeply. You may not believe me, but I always have," His declaration honestly surprised you, "For the years I was gone, I always cared for you. I always hoped that miraculously you'd cross my path one day. I always hoped I would find you again- and then, I'd make sure I never left you again... I hated the way things ended between us so suddenly," His voice was full of remorce,

"I always thought you didn't have time," You breathed, to which he smiled,

"I was a stupid man," He said softly, moving a hand to rest gently on your cheek, "I was focused on too many things at once. I should have made space for you..." He said. For a moment he was quiet, and his eyes left your, downcast, "When you... Were attacked. And I found you in that alleyway... A part of me felt that that was it. That I had been foolish enough to get you killed," He said, the sadness clear in his tone, "That I had not gotten the chance to rebuild what we once had properly," Gently, you covered his hand on your face with your own,

"But you didn't, Silco," You assured him, "You saved me. You kept me safe and you nurtured me back to health. I wouldn't be... Here without you," You reminded him. With a defeated sigh, he comes to rest his forehead against yours, closing his eyes. You reveled in the closeness, a small smile coming to your lips once more as your own eyes shut. For a moment you remaind in eachother's presence, happily, until he pulled away to continue. He didn't move far, staying close and gazing at you with eyes full of emotion,

"When you were unconscious," He continued, his voice soft and velvety, "I truely felt like I had lost everything," He admitted, shocking you with his words, "In those moments that Sevika and I found you... It was as if the very future of Zaun didn't matter to me anymore. All the work I had built up to, and spent years of my life planning- it all didn't matter to me... Because you were close to death and it was my fault. All I could hope for was that you would make it out alive,"

"Silco..." You breathed emotionally, feeling tears welling in your eyes. Stars, you had no idea you meant that much to him,

"And when I found out you were alive... And you would stay alive..." He continued, "I don't think I have ever felt a greater joy and relief," He spoke. Gently, he traced your cheekbone with his finger, "I vowed I would protect you... And I intend to keep that vow until the day I die," He spoke,

"Silco..." You whispered softly, eyes wide and watching his bio-coloured ones intensly. You hardly felt the tears slipping down your cheeks until he caught one with the pad of his thumb, whiping it off of your face,

"I am close to you in a way I haven't been with anyone in my life, (Y/N)" He spoke softly again, face moving closer, "The truth is, I have been in love with you since I was young. Since all we did was run the streets and survive together. At one point, I realised that... Survival to me wasn't all that mattered. Surviving with you was a greater pleasure than life itself," He smiled softly,  "You've always been there for me from the start, for Jinx as well. Only now have I been... Courageous enough to tell you how deeply you have affected me," He spoke. The music ended, and started once more. There it was. The confession you longed for since the beginnning. Since he had shown up, and reignited those volatile feelings you had let fizzle out into embers. There he was, reciprocating your love for him, "I shouldn't have waited until you were almost gone... For that, (Y/N), I am eternally sorry," 

"I love you too, Silco," Was all you could say, smiling brightly up at him and moving your hands to wrap around his neck, "I have for a long time too... I was just... Never sure you'd feel the same for me," You felt your cheeks flush with warmth, more tears spilling down your face, "Stars, it feels really good to finally tell you..." You admitted, laughing happily

"Well, my love," He said with a smile, making your thundering heart flutter with joy, "I'm certain you know where I stand now," Those were the last words he said to you before you felt his lips  press against yours. Carefully moving a hand to the short ends of his hair, you held him there as you reciprocated the kiss- a staple of your shared love for one another.

And there you stayed together, until the stars lit up the sky and the music faded away into the air. Holding one another in a never-ending embrace, twin smiles covering your faces, and happiness fluttering between your aching hearts. A warm glow; a warm love, cemented within just a burning memory.

AN: AND WITH THAT VOLATILE IS FINISHED!! Thank you, eternally, for reading this silly fanfic! Your kind messages helped me finish this and reassured me my work was good. As of completion (9/5/22) i have no plans in writing extra parts BUT check back in the future! You never know ;)

I'm hoping this ending was good and not a dissapointment- I know it took me a while i'm very sorry ;-; but it's here now.I love you all, thank you so much for reading, and I hope you have a lovely day <3

-Musique

#volatilearcane #arcane netflix #silco fanfic #silco x y/n #silco arcane #silco x reader #silco #arcane league of legends

[infitsovermisfits]

Volatile P1: Meeting an Old Friend

info: "It's been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

i also made a seperate blog (<<click) for my silco fic :p

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5

possibly will have more parts? I'll try my best i just wanted to write for him so much he's been on my mind all day ;-;

WARNINGS: gender-neutral reader, mentions of pain, violence, murder, explosions etc. Takes place roughly hours after the events of episode 3 enjoy ;)

2057 words

Another hard day at the mines left your body aching and sweating. There were times where you thought your bones and muscles would one day betray you and crumble to dust, leaving you in a broken heap from all the work you do. Trudging into the backrooms of the dingy restaurant you worked at part-time, your eyes rolled as your boss pointed out you were 'late' once again, and that's all you spoke to him in the 3 hours you worked. Finally, you were free, the usually soft grey clouds that were visible between peaks of black and brown smoke had shifted to black, the night looming overhead. Your gaze focused on the ground as you walked, not wanting to see the usual street lurkers and thieves, or the lust-filled backstreets of Zaun. All you longed for was your bed- although not the best, you at least had one. And you should be grateful for it. Miss Eclipt was doing you a huge favour renting a room so cheap with a bed in it,  even if it meant she'd complain to you about how she's wasting money.

The aching in your body seemed to only intensify the more you trudged, but reminding yourself of the knowledge that you'd be sleeping soundly soon filled you with determination. Soon you made it, as usual, Miss E. greeting you and commenting on the stench of sweat that caused your clothes to cling to your skin,

"Not as bad as the fumes, Miss E," You jested tiredly, to which the small woman tsked and walked away. You headed to the communal showers, wincing and pushing the thoughts of the germs and bacteria that had built up here for a while, and undressing. You grabbed the least grimey towel, hidden away from plain sight and washed under the cold water, shivering.

Once again, you trudged up the stairs, knees, arm, back screaming in a painful unison as you slowly ascended, gripping the towel close to you. Luckily it was too late for anyone else to be up so no one would see you, but you'd surely get yelled at for all the excess water you dripped off on your way up.

Quickly drying your body, you grabbed your night clothes and slipped them on in a trance like routine, your body acting on its own amidst the pain as usual. Finally. Finally, you lay down, starfishing and sighing deeply as the stillness surrounded you, the pain making your face scrunch as you waited for it to transform into aches. Pulling on the blanket, your heavy eyes fell shut, as your mind flooded away to sleep.

It was still dark. Your hazy dream of a saturated world faded away and in place of those happy bright colours, the usual greys and blacks filled your vision. Blinking and shuffling your legs beneath the covers you felt an unusual weight. Frowning, you sat up and let out a faint gasp, your eyes springing open and breath quickening at the figure sitting at the foot of your bed.

He was there, clad in a dark coat, his head bowed and his elbows resting loosely on his thin knees turned to the side from you. The collar obscured his head slightly, so only the top of his hair was visible, and the tip of his long nose. He made no noise entering, explaining why you didn't wake sooner- you still couldn't determine if he came through the window or door: nothing looked out of place, not even his footprints seemed to disturb the layer of dust mimicking a carpet on your floor. With a sigh, his shoulders drooped, and his face finally turned to look at you.

One of his eyes appeared hooded, the other black, and glowing red in the darkness, whole and circular, the absence of an eyelid clear. In the faint light, you made out the scars slicing down this discoloured portion of his face. His lips were pulled into a frown as he observed you- his neutral facial expression.

The initial panic of another person being in your house subsided,

"Silco," You sighed in relief. Having a known murderer and dangerous man should elicit a different response. But alas,

"This is where you live," This comment, not question, was laced in his low voice, the volume barely above a hum. You stopped yourself from whispering a 'yes', and only gave a nod as you lowered the bed covers from where you clutched them protectively at first. The weight left your bed, and you listened to his silent footsteps as he explored the small space, "No kitchen," An observant comment. Once you finished rubbing the remnants of sleep from your eyes you pointed to a small bot full of ash, next to a kettle and pot. He walked right by them, glancing at the shelf where most of your clothes were and he stopped at the desk under your window littered with bills, receipts and other papers. Placing a hand on it revealed it wobbled back and forth, squeaking and rattling the pen and pencil. A soft grunt left his lips, his body reducing to a silhouette in front of a window, "This is barely a home," Yet another observation.

"Did Miss E. let you in?" You asked wearily, dropping your arms to your lap and squinting to be able to see him, eyes focusing on the glowing red pupil that emanated from his eye.

"I entered myself," He said, not moving,

"And to what do I owe you this visit?" You placed your chin on your hand, leaning an elbow on your head as he had done before, "After our argument years ago, I surely thought I'd never hear from any of you again. I thought you slunk into the darkness like the sewer rat you are," you told him casually. From how you squinted, you made out his frown, appearing more pronounced. He sighed,

"Savika is in a critical state. As is Singed, and most of my men and women," This perked up your attention, and you sat up in shock,

"Stars- how?" You said, moving the covers aside to reveal you wearing tattered everyday clothes, clearly frequently used, as pyjamas "What happened- how did-"

He produced something that caught the dim green light outside from his pockets. Gingerly taking it, you felt the coolness of metal against your fingers, the shape feeling slightly heavy, and being decorated with a cartoonish monkey- mouth painted red with sharp teeth and eyes glaring with angry eyebrows. The artwork of a child,

"A bomb," He said nonchalantly, moving from you to stand closer to the door, his hands moving behind his back as he locked his fingers together. Turning to see your shocked expression again, "She lost her family and-"

"Dear Stars, Silco don't tell me y-"

"I'm not entirely responsible... In fact, she is," He looked down, with what you thought could be a hint of sadness. It was difficult to tell- as was everything with Silco, "She created a powerful explosion- Sevika's arm is completely destroyed, beyond repair... Had she not jumped in front of me, likely I would have suffered that fate," He admitted with a heavy sigh, clear he felt regret, "Bodies were found in the rubble. Children. Likely her siblings. Vander-"

"You killed him?" You asked expectantly, to which his eye narrowed and he nodded,

"Vander was not the man you knew him to be," he said as he averted his gaze. His tone indicated he had rehearsed the phrase already,

"I know, Silco. He tried to kill you," You said, frowning, "And you... I understand your... Ways are unconventional, but I can't support... It's inhumane," At that his lips lifted into a small smile,

"There's a monster in all of us," Another rehearsed phrase, "You supported me once before, didn't you?" Your annoyance grew,

"Why did you come here?" You hissed now, a glare forming, "If you expect me to help you in-"

"I need you to help her," He cut you off. You fell silent again, eyes widening in shock as your head connected the dots

"You're didn't-"

"I took her in,"

"Silco that's-"

"What?" He watched you expectantly, eyebrow raised. His other, drawn on remained still, and you eyed the corrupted side of his face. You frowned, "It's what?" he asked, his voice dropping low again, judgemental,

"Is this... The best choice for her..?" You questioned him. He didn't have a response to this, allowing you to elaborate, "You taking her. Your lifestyle isn't exactly best suited for a child- she has no one else?"

"Shall I bring her to you?" You asked, bitterness seeping into his words and you found yourself cowering slightly in shame, glancing at the grey, tattered walls of your home, "Could you offer her more?"

"Safety-"

"Believe me, (Y/N), she is safer with me than she would ever be with Vander," His brother's name was spat at you, and you found yourself defeated, a sigh leaving your lips. You pressed them together, turning your attention back to the decapitated metal monkey head in your clutched palm, and tracing the now warm metal,

"You need me to train her how to make bombs?" You asked, frowning, "You'll turn her into a weapon?"

"She needs to know the dangers of her work. I'm not creating a weapon, I'm cultivating a passion" He lifted a hand to correct you, his long fingers pressed together, and your attention focused on a scar slicing into his palm, grip tightening around the monkey head in your palm, the metal touching a similar scar on your own palm "You're the only person I know who's... As inventive as she is," He said sincerely, dropping his hand and hiding it behind his back again

"I don't do that anymore," You reminded, "V- He, you and I all walked our separate ways years ago. For a reason. A good reason. And I threw that life away behind me, and-"

"And look where it landed you," He finished for you, smugly, our glare intensifying as you looked up at him, expression neutral, and yet teasing clear in his tone,

"This apartment is fine-"

"It's barely a home. It reaks of the mines. It's cold and damp. There's mould-"

"You've got a kid one day, and suddenly you're an expert on home decor Silco?" You shot back at him, His eye narrowed again, "Next time, let me ask you for advice before you barge into my home and complain,"

"I'm offering you a better life. For a favour. A simple one at that. Help her," He said lowly, and then shocked you, "Please," You had to admit, it may be the first time you ever heard him utter the word. You didn't even think it was part of his vocabulary. He was clearly passionate and in need of help. And damn your kind heart for empathising with the poor girl.

Losing family was something you were, unfortunately, familiar with, as was Silco and Vander. The three of you met in the Lanes, and formed a bond you had hoped was unbreakable. Now one of you was dead. The other, the killer and you... The one in the middle.

"Fine," You sighed, extending the warmed metal back to him, "But I'll need the right equipment and a workshop, as well as ingredients, and books. I'm a little rusty on my knowledge and wouldn't want something to go wrong"

"Don't worry, I'll get you whatever you need," He said, with surprising care. He turned away from you without taking the object, "My people will come to escort you with your things tomorrow,"

"I have work tomorrow," you stepped closer, still offering him the monkey. He gazed at you with his blackened eye, darting quickly over your face, wide and alert, unresting,

"Resign," He said simply, opening your door and stopping for a moment, " 'The Last Drop' is in need of a new bartender," walking down the stairs of your apartment and disappearing out of your sight. You shut the door, leaning against it,

"Stars guide me towards your light..." You whispered, your hand tightening around the metal of the object and pressing it to your chest, your gaze drifting to the dirty green window, in hopes they'd still hear you over the pollution filled air, "I'm dealing with fucking criminals again," You sighed in defeat, the monkey head being abandoned on your desk, watching as you pulled a backpack from bellow your bed and begun to stuff it with the few possessions you owned.

#arcane #silco #silco x reader #silco my beloved #arcane league of legends #arcane netflix #arcane series #arcane spoilers #arcane fanfic #arcane silco #volatilearcane

[silcoseye]

Volatile P3: Do You Remember Seeing the Stars for the First Time?

info: "It's been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8

warnings: gender-neutral reader, bomb-making, bomb exploding, mentions of child labour, mentions of murder, violence, claustrophobic settings, big fish, swearing (this one is pretty wholesome ngl)

i kept getting distracted trying to write this by "cupcakke - Squidward nose" so at least you all know my heart was in a good place. honestly, as i was writing towards the end i was like 'omg this is so good' so if you all don't think the same I'll cry (/j) IMPORTANT (/srs): I have a fair amount of uni work to do in less than 2 weeks so these updates are gonna slow and I'm going to try and focus on getting my work done before deadlines thank you all, happy reading

7556 words

Jinx came over almost daily to learn the art of bomb-making- and her progress was astonishingly fast. Something you found endearing was that she always doodled on the outsides of her projects. In fact, she doodled on whatever she could get her hands and those neon markers on- clothes, walls, paper, skin. She used them up so quickly, Silco switched to buying her easily accessible crayons, pencils and cheap markers- they were nothing compared to the markers, but she wasn't complaining. She loved it.

Another thing she loved- arguably more than tinkering and creating- was blowing things up with them. Nearby was an abandoned air shaft that you'd visit with her and Silco, testing her creation and smiling brightly at her excitement whenever they'd work, emitting colourful explosions.

As the weeks became months, you noticed her hair beginning to grow rapidly, and, bless Silco, the poor man clearly had no idea what to do with it. Fearing it would get caught on fire, or caught in something that would injure her during your lessons, you offered to put it up for her, as she had no clue what to do with it either. At first, it was styled into a simple long ponytail but she grew bored of it quickly and wasn't much safer. You then offered to braid it for her, which she was hesitant to at first,

"How about two braids then?" You asked, "to make it more fun and interesting," Her eyes lit up at your proposition and she smiled. Carefully instructing her to sit as still as she could, you started by sectioning her hair in two, while she began to eagerly tell you about whatever came to her mind,

"Silco took me to see the water," She said at one point. You froze as you combed her hair. That place. The place where you had almost lost him to Vander.  It startled and confused you,

"He did?" She nodded, before mumbling an apology, knowing she wasn't supposed to move her head while you worked, "How was it?"

"I liked it. I wanted to swim but he said no. He said it's dirty water, and we have clean water at home," She explained, "He told me that there's huge fish underwater. I saw some of them too.  They're so beautiful, and they don't even know it," You smiled at that, "That's what he told me," she said, as you tied one of the sections into a loose ponytail and let it hang over Jinx's front,

"He did?" She hummed, to indicate a 'yes', tongue poking out as she focused on the detailing of her portrait of Silco,

"He did," She confirmed, "He likes the fish, so I'm drawing him one!" flawless logic,

"Like a pet?"

"Like a friend," You smiled at her innocence, a sigh escaping your lips,

"What's the fishy's name?" you asked, brushing her hair back to begin the first braid,

"The fish can be called (Y/N)!" She grinned, causing you to grimace and then laugh along with her,

"Are you teaching her to draw now?" Silco's low voice cut through your laughter, causing both your heads to turn to Silco, who had just returned. Jinx ran to him quickly, the hair slipping from your loose hold on it, and hugged him tightly. You did find it strange that Sevika was the one who dropped her off today- with a glare and grumble as you thanked her. You eyed the cape she wore over her shoulder and the blue scar on her cheek as you let Jinx inside, "Hello, Jinx," He said affectionately patting her head, before looking at you with a puzzled expression, "What are you doing with her hair?" He asked intrigued, eyes flicking to the brush in your other hand,

"I'm making sure Jinx's hair doesn't get in the way of her work," You said, patting the stool, indicating for Jinx to return. Giving you another apology, she returned, quickly moving the drawing she was doing and flipping it upside down to hide from Silco, and beginning to draw on a new sheet of paper, "I'm giving her braids,"

"Ah," He nodded, leaning on one of the workbenches next to you and watching as you brushed through her hair once again in silence, "Are they easy to do?" With a surprised glance at him, you shook your head,

"No, you just section it and criss-cross," You said, splitting the section of blue hair into three sections and beginning to braid,

"Slow down," He asked suddenly, moving from where he was leaning and moving to stand next to you, watching intrigued as you now slowly braided her hair, "Hmm. It's a pattern," You nodded,

"Right over the middle, left over the middle. You wanna try that side?" You offered, gripping the end of the amount of hair you braided so it wouldn't fall loose and handing him the hairbrush. Tentatively, he took it from you, undoing the hair with such delicacy that one would have thought it strings of porcelain. You smiled, "It's already mostly brushed out so she shouldn't have any tough knots in there," You assured him, and yet still he still brushed through it gently, building up some courage. He finally set down the brush and sectioned the hair as you had previously done,

"Like this?" He asked for clarification, eye-widening as he saw you were already finished and tying up the braid so it wouldn't come undone. Running your hand gently under the braid to make sure it lay smooth against the girls back, you looked in his direction,

"Mhm, that's great, Silco. Now you just have to braid it," you reminded him, "Let me show you," you offered, moving closer to him and gently reaching to take his hands in yours, moving them as you had instructed him, "Right over the middle, left over the middle," You said softly, letting go of his hands once you felt him figure out the pattern, "Make sure it's tight so it doesn't come undone so easily," You added quickly, watching his braid. It was so sweet, so caring. How focused he appeared on making the braid look good, and how his long, slender fingers wove the hair together. It took him significantly longer than you, but you could tell he was being as careful as possible.

Once he reached the bottom of her hair, you handed him a hair tie and watched as he delicately finished his work, standing back and sighing as he placed a hand to his aching back, comparing the two braids,

"You did so well, Silco," You smiled at him before he could say something self-deprecating, turning to see Jinx smiling brightly and showing him she finished fish drawing- one of its eyes was a red 'x' while the other was just a blue dot- you thought her Silco Fish was adorable. Smiling at her, you spoke, "There's a mirror just outside if you want to look at your hair, and then we can start our lesson" You and Silco turned your heads to watch her race out of the room,

"Thank you for teaching me," the words almost knocked you off your feet and your brows raised in clear shock. You couldn't hide the slight blush that dusted your cheeks and caused them to warm as Silco looked at you, "I had no idea you knew how to do things with hair like that. To tell the truth, it was getting unmanageable," He sighed. You could tell he was tired through the bags under his eyes and a slight slouch in his position. Testing the waters, you reached a hand up to pat his shoulder,

"No problem," you said, surprised again that he didn't brush you off, "Where were you this morning? Savika dropped Jinx off to-"

"She arrived on time?" He asked sternly now. With a small sigh, you nodded,

"On the dot," You confirmed, hoping it would keep the woman out of trouble. Jinx returned, declaring she loved the braids and hugged Silco first and then, surprisingly you. You smiled, patting her head as Silco had done,

"Okay, we can start now!" She said eagerly as she pulled away and hopped back on the chair. With her hair out of the way, you cleared the papers and made sure to set her Silco, Jinx and (Y/N) fish portrait to the side so she could continue at the end, and your lesson began.

For the next few days, Silco would come in with Jinx- even on the days where she had an allocated break from learning- staying while you braided her hair. This continued until eventually, he got so good at doing it himself that she would come with the twin braids already hanging down her back, excited to learn as usual.

The longer she was with him, the more you saw Silco's normally icy exterior melt with her childish innocence. It was so abundantly clear to anyone that he cared deeply for the girl. You had been to his office a few times when he called for you to check on her progress. Just scanning his desk, you could tell she had been there; the ashtray he used with his cigars was painted with neon blue and pink details, and considering he hadn't just opted to get a new one, he must have been proud of her artwork. You always had positive things to say- not out of fear that he'd replace you if she wasn't satisfied- but because you recognised her brilliance and creativity.

The only thing still dragging you down was your curiosity to know her origins. You were torn between going out and searching for the answer on your own and waiting patiently for Silco to tell you himself when he was ready. In the end, you decided to remain as patient as you could be. Silco would tell you eventually- you hung on to this belief. He trusted you... Right?

Why else would he turn to you right after he found Jinx? Why else did he ask you to help him teach her, and not someone else with more professional practice and experience in this line of work? Why else did he value your opinion of her when he clearly didn't give a shit about the others?

You've seen the glares Sevika gave to the child plenty of times when she thought no one was looking, and you were still unaware as to why she disliked the poor girl so much. Often, Silco would begrudgingly ask her to watch her while he attended to his cryptic 'business' to attend to, and watching as she begrudgingly accepted.

Jinx quickly grew to adore the time she spent with you, as it meant she could focus on her creativity- in bomb-making and art. Your conversations were always light chatter, and sometimes she'd tell you about her life before Silco. Only small details- like a boy named Ekko learned the basics of welding, and other metalwork alongside her, and they both learned from Benzo, a merchant that lived nearby. You recognised him as being Vander's friend. Jinx took to making bombs because "they were more fun", in her words, and you laughed along with her. However, you still couldn't shake she wasn't okay. Sometimes when you asked for more information on her past, she got very quiet and almost refused to speak with you anymore until you changed the topic. You never pressed her for more after that. One day, she mentioned it was her birthday, just out of the blue. Her older sister had taught her the date and month, and your eyes widened. What followed was a day off, and an incredibly messy attempt to bake a cake.

Silco returned to your home to find the girl's face and clothes dusted in flour, hands sticky with dough and icing and grinning up at him, bouncing on her feet as she eagerly declared you made a cake. His gaze turned to you, situated in the kitchen, sympathetically smiling. Instructed her to wash her hands, he joined you in the kitchen, remaining quiet as he watched you place the top half of the cake onto a layer of cream. Washing your own hands once you were done, you gave Jinx free reign to decorate it with the colourful icing you made in separate bowls. Once you finished, you dried them and joined Silco across the counter from Jinx, observing her with an amused smile. You leaned your elbows on the counter and reached for a discarded spoon you used to mix the icing with,

"She said it was her birthday today," You explained to him, licking some of the icing off your finger. You blushed to see his eyes lingering on your face as you did this. You turned to watch the young girl instead, slathering the cake with the blue icing, "I thought she deserves a cake at least... Had I known earlier I would have gotten her a gift," you looked back at him apologetically, once you felt the burning in your cheeks subside, and he simply smiled and shook his head,

"It's alright, (Y/N). Thank you for at least giving her a fun day off," You nodded, and remained quiet for a moment, watching as she worked away,

"So what business did you need to attend today?" you tried, expecting him to remain also quiet and not tell you,

"I was buying Jinx a birthday present," You blinked for a moment, turning to see him with a sly smirk on his lips. Jinx let out a small gasp at his words, and clumsily set the flat spatula she was using to decorate the cake with back into the pink icing bowl, moving from the small stepstool you got for her and running to the side of the counter you two were on, watching him eagerly.

He crouched beside you, and it only then did you notice he was carrying a small wrapped parcel behind his back. He crouched before her and offered it to her.  Taking it from him with a small 'thank you', she eagerly unwrapped the paper and gasped in surprise at the contents. You smiled, seeing the bright neon markers she had taken from you all those months ago. A cacophony of eager thank you's burst from her, and she ran quickly into Silco's arms, hugging him tightly, shoulder shaking slightly as she cried from happiness.

The markers had been ridiculously difficult to find apparently for both you and Silco. A while ago, you thought to surprise her and buy her the markers she had fallen in love with all those months ago but came up empty, returning home exhausted and neon markerless. And considering it took him a whole day just to find them and bring them to her, you guessed he may have had to go to Piltover or... Somewhere else. Perhaps he has a neon marker dealer you didn't know but needed to seek out. You had to ask him.

Jinx pulled away with the brightest smile you've ever seen on her lips. She was clearly so overwhelmed and happy it just warmed your heart to see. Like you, she'd likely grown up with very little around her. And you realised this may be the first cake she'd ever had, considering her excitement when you showed her the size of the cake pan. Once she calmed down (and you assured her they were not edible and couldn't go on the cake) she resumed her decorating, eager to finish so she could draw again. You settled next to Silco, looking over the markers and trying to see their brand, only for him to cover it with his pale hand. You sent him a playful glare, but it faded quickly and you only smiled. His gaze went to you as he felt your eyes on him,

"What?" His asked expectantly, looking down at you amused,

"Nothing... I was just trying to see what brand those markers were," You said innocently. You regretted not paying attention to what it was when you first got them and gave them away, not knowing she would take to them like that,

"I'm not revealing my secrets," He said plainly,

"Silco? Keeping secrets? Unheard of," You mocked surprise, making him exhale some air out of his nose in a silent laugh. Studying him, you turned your attention back to Jinx, "Seriously where did you get them, they're really good markers," You hissed,

"When's your birthday?"

"Haha," You said sarcastically, rolling your eyes. With a small sigh, you went quiet, watching as she finished up the cake,

"Thank you for baking with her," He said sincerely, and when you met his gaze, his eyes held emotion in them. You gave him a nod,

"She deserves it, doesn't she?" You told him, and with a nod, he agreed with you.

Jinx ate about a quarter of the cake, ran around your house, completed 6 drawings, before passing out across Silco's lap on the couch. He had undone one of the braids and delicately ran his fingers through her wavy hair, separating the strands. You watched the domestic scene before you, sipping some tea and watching.

He casually smoked a cigar, an ashtray placed on the side of your couch to tap off the excess ash. He was focused so hard on Jinx's hair he barely seemed to register your staring. His head was tilted slightly to the side, giving you a clear view of his corrupted eye and the scars indenting his cheek and forehead. Everything about him was sharp in such a handsome way, and yet this time his body no longer held its usual tension. The longer you spent time with him, you slowly started to notice how he'd emerge from his office with his shoulder's squared, but they'd slump and relax slightly whenever Jinx tackled his legs into a hug and you delivered her back to him. Although it was hard to tell now, due to the position he was sitting in, he was relaxed too. One of his arms leaned against the back of the couch, the hand that held the cigar carefully poised over the ashtray to not land on your couch, smoke slowly dissipating into the air and filling it with the scent of tobacco. His other was brushing out Jinx's hair,

"Are you enjoying yourself?" His voice was soft but carried deliciously through the air between you. You set the steaming mug of tea down from where it was resting against your lips, and  looking at the brown liquid to avoid looking at him at the realisation he knew you were observing him,

"It's nice to see you like this. You look comfortable and relaxed," You explained, trying to match your tone and volume to his, finally looking up to meet his curious gaze. It was his turn to openly stare, however, you lacked his unapologetic confidence and looked away, brushing a hand through your hair, "So-"

"It's nice to see me?" He repeated with a small smirk, and you rolled your eyes,

"I haven't seen you in a long time. Not since..." You trailed off and watched his smile fade away, his gaze turning to look to the floor. Rubbing his forehead carefully with the hand holding the cigar, he brought it back to his lips and inhaled deeply, and let the smoke slowly rise out of his thin lips. You watched him place it back into the ashtray,

"Since Vander tried to kill me," He finished for you, eye squinting with an icy glare above your head,

"You... Haven't told me what happened after that," You reminded him, looking from the dark brown liquid in your cup, back to him. He focused on you,

"You were there. You pulled me from the waters and took me to shore," He reminded you,

"Yes, but what happened after that?" You finally said, sitting up in curiosity. It took him a while to reply, figuring out how to form the words in his head, figuring out how best to tell you. Or perhaps he was thinking of another clever way to distract you,

"Once we split, I gathered those who opposed Vander. Safe to say they were surprised to see me alive. He apparently told them I was dead," There was venom in his words, and you only nodded along, ignoring the tightness in your chest as the memories of heartbreak come flooding back. "I gathered those who still wanted to send the topsiders a message with violence and would continue to do so. His lie did me a favour... It allowed me to disappear," He picked the cigar back up, "I found Singed, the scientist, and became a sponsor of his... Projects," He explained, "When you found me, my eye was beyond repair-" Letting go of Jinx's hair, you watched as his delicate fingers traced along one of the marks on his face, "-I could barely see you helping me out of the toxic waters-" his hand travelled down the scar, down his face as he spoke, "-When I found Singed, by some luck he managed to salvage it-" The scar stopped at his lip, and he took his hand from his face to place it back into Jinx's hair "-only the toxins had eaten away at most of the flesh," With a slight shake of his head, he continued, "he managed to salvage my vision, what was left of it that is. Regardless, I was then forever in debt to him. Whatever he needed, I would supply it," He uttered, eyes focusing on you, "And then he showed me... A private project of his... You know it as Shimmer," you nodded in agreement, "He cultivated it and I lent him a helping hand," he finished,

"Right," You said, thinking for a moment, "He fixed your eye," He leaned his head down in a nod, "And in turn, you helped him create the drug that took over Zaun," He nodded again, "Is that all you did?" He laughed at that,

"It kept me busy," He raised a brow, "Is that all you wanted to know, (Y/N)?" He asked,

Of course not. You wanted to ask so much more. About Jinx, her origins, more questions about him. Specifically his feelings for you. If they were strictly platonic or did he yearn for your affection like you his. Did he find you beautiful too? Did he fantasize about falling asleep entangled together too? If his feelings for you were still in his cold hear somewhere,

"Nothing comes to mind, Silco," You settled, with a polite smile that was soon hidden behind your teacup again as you took another sip. Looking back at him, you noticed him staring at you, clearly unconvinced by your answer. He didn't push you for more, thankfully. The truth was you weren't ready for such forward confessions, and you were so unsure and afraid of his reaction.   Jinx being in his life brought the best out of him, you thought. He had desperately tried to push all human care and love out of his heart to replace it with bitterness, only for Jinx to crash into his life and remind him what it was to feel again. Looking down at the girl you smiled softly, "I've never seen her as happy as she was today" you told him, "It's sweet that you got her those markers. If I knew it was her birthday I would have got her something too," you repeated with a sad sigh,

"I'm sure these markers will keep her busy for the foreseeable future," His hand affectionately went back to Jinx's hair, now undoing the other braid and gently undoing the hair, "Besides, I don't think you'd be able to find them, even if you searched the entirety of Zaun," He teased. You smiled at him, narrowing your eyes,

"Does that mean you got them from Piltover?" Mimicking your earlier movements, he only raised his brows and bought the cigar to his lips inhaling. You shook your head, "One day I'll find them and hoard them here so you won't find them,"

"You'll never find my supplier," he murmured, leaning his head back against the back of the couch as he exhaled the smoke into the air,

"An art supplier from Piltover," You put two and two together, "Thanks Silco," you said playfully,

"Good luck finding the right one," He chuckled, his head leaning forward again to look at you, "Stars know the amount of pretentious 'artists' that city produces," there was a sting to his words, and you only nodded along,

"Course it does," You agreed with a sigh, "Such freedom must be wonderful," You said softly, "I wish I could have painted or drawn when I was a child... Instead of working the mines," You looked at Jinx, "It's... Why I was so nervous about teaching her how to make bombs. The fact that she's still so young. I constantly have to remind myself that she's only a child, and I feel horrible for corrupting her mind with such violence..." You said sadly, "I lived through it. I know how bad it gets. I didn't want her childhood to be like this too," you admitted. Looking back to him, meeting his intense gaze, "But you... Silco, you clearly care for her so much. You would never let anything bad happen to her intentionally and I know that," You assured him, "I just.." you sighed, words escaping you.

"I understand your fears, (Y/N)," He said smoothly, "I have them too... I had my reservations on taking in a child," His voice had a twinge of sadness to it, "But she was alone. She had lost everything- everyone in her life. I realised I was all she had left. I realised without me... She would die," He admitted, "It's not an ideal life for her. I know this. So I try my best to give her the best I can find. All so she doesn't see the shit we went through," His eyes locked with yours, "You do too... And I appreciate your efforts too, (Y/N)," he said, the gratitude clear in his voice. A comfortable silence settled as you ate a biscuit and drank some tea, and he finished with her hair. His cigar stopped smoking, but the tobacco still hung in the air thickly, engulfing you, "Thank you for teaching her," He broke the silence eventually, "I'll make sure to repay you in the future,"

"You don't have to do anything for me- you gave me this apartment," You quickly told him, watching as he smiled and shook his head, "That's more than enough,"

"This is a necessity. I'll get you something else,"

"Like what?" you asked

"Anything," He let out a breath, "Anything you would want,"

After finishing your tea, he picked Jinx up from his lap, gently cradling her close to him and moving to the door. You took his coat from the rack, draping it over his shoulders and relishing in the overwhelming scent of smoke and vanilla that surrounded him like an invisible cloud,

"Thank you," He exhaled,

"I thought you were incapable of using those words," You teased. You were so close to him that you felt the air exhale from his nose as he laughed lightly,

"I live and I learn..." He said softly. He lingered near you for a moment, and you took this as a cue to open the front door for him. Before you got to it, he interrupted you, "I'll take you somewhere nice tonight" He offered,

"Somewhere nice?" You asked, looking at him, to see him nod and approach, "It better not be a rooftop again. I'm not dragging you off there like last time," You narrowed your eyes, a hand resting on the door handle. He smiled at you,

"It'll be nicer than a rooftop. I promise,"

"You promise?"

"Be ready in an hour and we'll go," He said,

"Why this sudden proposition?" You asked curiously, "What changed?"

"I'm repaying your kind work," He said, and as he saw you beginning to protest he raised a brow, "Don't start," He commanded, and even at a whisper, you could tell he was stern, "Please. I just want you to join me,"

"Alright, Silco. I will," You opened the door for him and watched as he momentarily left you, taking the girl back to their home.

"When I said I didn't want to go to a rooftop I didn't expect the exact opposite," You said, moving after him cautiously into a run-down building. Bits of it had been singed and covered in black soot, and it was long abandoned, the signs being obvious in the abundance of dust and emptiness. The thick smell of smoke and gunpowder still hung in the air- you'd need to wash these clothes when you got home. You eyed an elevator that was in an equally bad shape that Silco was slowly approaching, the floor numbers flashing weakly in the dim room.

Silco smiled softly once you got to it. He had walked with his usual confident swagger, hands behind his back and footsteps confident, heavy and slow. You moved next to him, catching up after taking in your deteriorating surroundings, and got to the broken doors of the elevator shaft. He grabbed it and grunted as he pulled it back, the door promptly falling back into its sliding hinges with a creek. He turned back to you, indicating with his hand for you to enter first. Following his instructions, you frowned deeply as you looked at the dusty, run-down elevator,

"Is this even safe?" you asked, worry laced into your words, looking over the buttons and numbers that emitted a low buzz. He entered quietly as always and brushed past you, pressing the lowest floor possible, causing the elevator to jerk to life and begin its slow descent,

"So far," He commented, leaning against the brass metal casually,

"Silco, I swear to all the stars in the sky, if this elevator breaks while we're in it... Are you telling me there are no stairs we could have used instead?" the fear was clear in your tone, not at all comforted by his casualness,

"It hasn't broken and won't break," he said smoothly, and with only his word to trust, you sighed, standing by him and watching as light illuminated outside of the open door,

"How did it all break?" You asked, "Time?" he shook his head,

"Time..." He confirmed, "And external forces..." He added mysteriously with a sigh, turning his head to observe you, "You're still terrified of small spaces?" He asked out,

"Specifically ones that might kill me because they're not safe," You said, making him chuckle lowly,

"You wouldn't like this place when it was open," He said, "There are no stairs. Its a crucial design flaw. That's why it closed years ago. It almost burned down when one of the chefs caught their apron on fire and almost burned down the whole building. Maximum weight limit allowed 5 people in here at a time- old technology- and a few patrons sustained serious burns" he explained

"Was this a restaurant?" You blushed at the implications. Was he intentionally bringing you to a place usually associated with romance? Or was he-

You gasped again as the elevator shook and jolted again, creaks emanating from the heavy-duty wires above you. You could feel your heart drop in fear, and instinctively, you reached for his arm and gripped it, shutting your eyes tightly.

A moment passed and all movement stopped.

"We're here," He declared, but his voice was soft and soothing, intending to calm you. Straightening shakily and releasing the grip on his arm, you blushed as you watched this elevator door open- working correctly but covered in black soot- and blinked at the sight before you.

A laboratory was destroyed here. Shelves of empty beakers and surviving chemicals were scattered around, glass, ingredients and mysterious puddles littered below them. A fish tank, or terrarium of some sorts, had fallen and shattered, adding to the dusty, glassy, chemically mess on the floor, dirt spilling out of it. All of this was left to rot, abandoned. Everything was either covered in soot, burned to a crisp, or dusty. But what drew your attention the most was the bright azure window, as tall as the room itself, and the vast shapes moving behind the extensive crack splitting the window apart, drops of the water falling and puddling on the floor from the crevices.

Silco appeared next to you, standing and looking over the area with hints of reminiscence in his eye,

"This was Singed's laboratory," He clarified for you, gaze shifting to watch your bewildered face, transfixed by the humungous fish slowly swimming in front of the glass, obscured and disfigured by the crack. Following your gaze, he scanned them, eyeing the break in the glass, "Since the explosion, I've only been here with Jinx," he explained. An explosion- perhaps that was the 'external force' he mentioned before. But that didn't explain the soot... Maybe it caused an explosion to occur here. There must have been a lot of flammable things stored here,

"So that's why she draws the fish," you marvelled. This was the water see was talking about,

"I'm surprised it hasn't caved in yet..." He nodded. "However the structure is severely unstable," He pointed out the obvious, gesturing to the large crack. The force of a bomb could do something like this... Was this why you were teaching her how to safely make bombs? Did she cause this? You thought about reprimanding him for being so reckless to bring a child here,  or sharing your observations, but the enchanting atmosphere kept the words in your mouth,

"What was this? Before it... was a lab," You asked, finally tearing your eyes away as the gigantic fish disappeared to the left, and looking at Silco, who began to slowly wander across the room, closer to the glass. You followed,

"It used to be an underground dining area, only available to the rich ones who could afford it," he said, "This used to be a Topsiders exclusive restaurant... Until we claimed it," He said, tilting his head slightly and running his hands over a blackened workbench, the soot staining his two fingers. He rubbed them with his thumb, before looking over his shoulder to watch you approach his side,

"Ahh... You got jealous and wanted free entry?" You summed up playfully,

"Perhaps that too," He smiled, his gaze travelling to the window again. Standing close to him, you marvelled at the fish together. It hadn't been just the two of you since that night he got into your old apartment and asked you to help him. This felt nice,

"Silco?" You looked at him and listened to the small hum he gave you.  You allowed yourself to admire his sharp, angular features, eyes scanning his face as if to memorise it, subconsciously expecting to lose him again. As he turned to look at you, now being able to see his whole face illuminated by the glow of the waters before you, you took a small steadying breath, "I don't know if I told you... But it's really nice to see you after all these years," You said, "I'd be lying if I didn't say I missed you. I am... Glad you're back in my life," you said honestly, and watched as his features softened and he relaxed, a small smile appearing on his lips again,

"As am I," He said softly, and as you gazed at him, the impulse to suddenly touch your lips to his grew stronger and stronger. You were so close to him, shoulders practically touching. You wanted to reach out and touch him. Your body screamed and begged for you to do so. Perhaps you'd bump into the desk behind him. Perhaps he wouldn't care about the soot or dust staining his clothes as you distracted him with your mouth on his. Perhaps you'd forget about the threat of drowning looming above before you and calm your racing heart.

But damn your insecurities cursed patience, and childish curiosity making you turn your head back to the window, so he was completely eliminated from your vision. You calmed as a silence appeared between you two, filled only by the steady echoes of dripping, and deep underwater noises. He finally spoke after some time,

"(Y/N)," he drew your attention, "I need your help. I need more help than I would normally like to... request from another person," He admitted reluctantly with a sigh, a hand running through his hair, causing a few grey-black strands to fall to his forehead, "With Jinx," He finished, looking back to you, "I can only provide her with so much... She has a home, she has safety, she has basic necessities, and her drawings and materials because of me... But truth be told, without your help, I don't think she'd be as comfortable or happy as she is," He admitted, "Being around you makes her happy- you should hear the way she talks about you," You blushed at that, smiling pleasantly, "I'm serious, (Y/N). She wakes me up at ungodly hours demanding that she needs to arrive at her lessons on time, and the days she doesn't, she's asking about see you anyway, and what you do when she's not there," you laughed at that, "You always had that natural charm with children," he complimented softly, his gaze caring and... full of an emotion you couldn't quite pinpoint. Pride? Adoration?

"Cause you always scared them off with your bluntness," You teased, giving up on trying to read into him. Your comment made him smile a little wider, "Thank you for the flattery Silco, but you shouldn't give yourself such little credit. It's clear she loves you and considers you to be a father figure for her," he looked away now, considering your words. You could almost watch as the gears turned in his head. Shuffling a little on your feet to move that much closer to him, you took in a small breath, "I'd be more than happy to take her in for a little bit if it made things a bit easier on you," You offered, making him turn to look at you, shock clear in the way his brow and eyelid were raised, "Not completely take her away from you, of course... But I do have that spare bedroom. Some nights, if you can't make it, or have... things to do with whatever shady business you have going on now, I don't mind letting her stay over. You'd pick her up in the morning, as usual" You said. He remained quiet, considering your offer, "Silco," You said, making him look at you, "I really don't mind helping you- and you don't need to do anything for me in return. I'm just happy to be with you a-and her," you said quickly, to try and save yourself from slipping up too quickly and scaring him off, "You mean a lot to me..." You finished bravely, watching his face. You were thankful for the intense monochromatic blue that shielded the intensity of your blush from his intense gaze, full of an emotion you just couldn't discern. Then he did something you hadn't expected.

Silco had only hugged you a few times in your life, despite knowing each other for so long. You could probably count the hugs on one hand. The first time was when he was convinced you had been killed by enforcers on your way back to your shared home many moons ago when the tensions were high and you were only a few minutes late to a meeting. The second was after he had lost his eye. When you got him home and cleaned and bandaged what you could, used to the grotesque task by now, he asked you to hug him until he fell asleep against you on your bed, not letting you go until the early hours of the following morning. He pulled you close now and hugged you. You felt like floating. Pressing your head against his soft, yet firm, chest you were lulled by his rhythmic heartbeat and the deepwater sounds around you. You felt the gentle weight of his head against your shoulder and the indent of his chin. The warmth his body gave off surrounded you, and the scent of tobacco and cologne overwhelmed your senses. This felt right... It was perfect...

The hug was long- it was almost as if you were both making up for all the physical touch you were both starved of for years, neither wanting to let go. Silco hated touching anyone at all, and just about tolerated you and Vander when he was alive; you were indifferent to it. Silco was a champion of words, master manipulator. He spoke and fell silent when he needed to, and miraculously always had the correct timings. He told you once that hugging made him claustrophobic. You were happy he had gotten over his fears for this moment alone.

This alone planted a small seed in your mind- the seed that reassured you of his reciprocated feelings. You wouldn't believe in them until you heard it from him clearly- no word games, no beating about the bush, no fancy, dramatic antics or metaphors. Straight to the point, a clear yes or no. A clear 'I love you' or 'I don't feel the same way'. You understood this was a lot to ask of a person like Silco, and therefore you had to be patient. Moments like this gave you hope.

Shamelessly now, you watched him in the elevator as it went back up to the surface, slithers of light filtering over his face as you passed by the various floors. He caught your eyes with a small smirk, causing your own mouth to bloom into a smile,

"What?" you asked, "Are you up to something?"

"I just missed spending time with you... That's all," He clarified genuinely, "This made me feel young again, and lord knows I need it," He ran a hand through his greying hair again and placed his hands against his sides, stretching out his lower back,

"You trying to relive your youth, old man?" You teased, making him laugh,

"Ahh, something of the sort," He admitted, "I was reminded of the thrills of sneaking out at night together and seeing how close we could get to the Topsider's barriers without getting caught," You smiled fondly at the memories,

"Yeah wow... That feels like a lifetime ago now, yeah..." You agreed, leaning against the metal back of the elevator next to Silco, eyes glued to him,

"Do you remember seeing the stars for the first time?" he asked softly, and you nodded dreamily, smile already widening,

"Yes... Sometimes, I dream of them, you know," You admitted, "The sky stretching out endlessly, covered in them. I never knew there were so many out there... Sometimes my skin is made from the stars- blue and sparkling- and I'm dancing across the air. Sometimes, I'm simply walking and staring at them endlessly... They're some of the best dreams I've ever had," You said, your smile now beginning to hurt your cheeks. Turning to see his gaze at you with admiration made you blush, "It was the best gift I've ever received. Thanks," you said, remembering the night he woke you and brought you up to Topside for the first time. He nodded, seemingly remembering that same memory, with a similar fondness to you. You noticed him fade away into the shadows as you arrived at the top floor, and realised something. The fucker managed to distract you long enough to forget you were moving in a broken-down elevator. Following him out and watching him slide the door back out of place, you walked close to him as he led you to a side door, footsteps synchronising, together. You made no comment to thank him, but just appreciated he was going out of his way to comfort you. You'd already probably annoyed him with so much 'thank you's' today that he'd slink back into his criminal sewers like a rat,

"Trust is something rare to find in people," He said, his blackened eye focusing on you, the orange-red glow around his pupil holding your attention, "The world is different now. Dog eats dog, brother kills brother," he sighed heavily, "I'm glad that I can trust you still, (Y/N). Even after all these years," He said. You were close again for a moment, and your breath hitched when you realised. You expected him to kiss you, with the way his head leaned closer. Instead, he pushed the door open for you, and your eyes widened at the brightness of the night sky, clear, dark, and a beautiful deep blue speckled with drops of glittering white.

The stars twinkled back at you beautifully, hypnotising you as you felt your heart clench inside your chest with adoration and love, mesmerised by their radiance. A tear slid down your cheek, the stars reflecting in the salty dacrocyte, a culmination of overwhelming happiness.

He did still care for you. So much more than you had ever expected.

#silco my beloved #arcane spoilers #arcane silco #silco x reader #silco #arcane league of legends #arcane netflix #arcane #volatilearcane

[silcoseye]

Volatile P4: Face to Face; Cheek to Cheek

info: "It's been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8

WARNINGS: gender-neutral reader, mentions of food, smoking (if u do not, just ignore ;-;), alcohol consumption, violence (murder, death, child labour, abuse, knives, stabbing) sleep deprivation, use of makeup, mentions of nightmares, mentions of issues sleeping (alluded insomnia) sorry if i missed any

excited for you guys to read this one and tell me what you think <3 i need to stop rambling and writing such long chapters man ;-; i clearly do not have the self control y/n possessed. oh to be y/n one day. anyways. enjoy simps!!

9603 words

Recently, you decided to go through your scrap metals. Instead of completely getting rid of them by melting them together like you were used to, to not waste the materials, you found yourself with an abundance. It would be wasteful to just create an alloy, so you decided to try and repurpose them- craft something. You had spoken to Jinx about your own desire to draw and were surprised when she offered to help you, handing you a crayon and sheet of paper. This time it was her encouraging and teaching you how to draw a fish. It was fun. Then when Silco arrived to collect her, you saw the look of pride on his face when he saw your awkward-looking fish, and waved by to Jinx who said she'd teach you more the next day.

Captivated and overwhelmed by the sudden artistic urges to create, you worked tirelessly into the night- curving, welding, and shaping the metal into your desired shape. The sudden loud knock on your door caused you to jump in surprise, almost dropping the heat gun in your hands. You made sure everything was turned off in your workshop and slowly exited, wincing as your eyes stung and watered at the light and noise, a pounding headache quickly forming. You'd stayed up all night again. Fuck- that meant Silco and Jinx were here already. You glanced down as the girl rushed into your workshop as usual, but didn't miss how Silco's eyes scanned over your clothing,

"You wore this yesterday," His eyes lingered on your face, squinting judgementally as he studied the dark circles under your eyes,

"Ahaa... Yeah, I got really distracted and didn't realise the time," You said, trying to smooth down your dishevelled hair and stepping aside as he walked past you, looking over your apartment. You shut the door behind him, blinking slowly and wearily following him and trying to ignore the fact that your eyes were barely able to stay open. A yawn escaped your lips reluctantly, and even if you tried to hide it behind your hand his attentive ears caught the noise of your small gasp and slow inhale of air,

"You didn't sleep at all," He stated, glancing up as he saw Jinx emerge back from your workshop with a frown at your state. You wanted to slink back slightly, feeling as if he was reprimanding you, "You didn't eat breakfast," He added, looking over your clean kitchen and noticing everything was in the exact same place as it was when he last came over, no sign of a meal being made the night before or an hour prior. Moving from where he stood next to you to stand in front of you, he moved his hands behind his back and scrutinised you. Under his piercing gaze, you rubbed your forehead slightly, feeling a headache begin to form, "Care to explain why you haven't been looking after yourself?" He asked,

"I..." You sighed, "You know what happens when I get too focused on something, Silco," You said, to which he hummed, but his expression was unmoving. For a moment more, he just studied your face, before he turned to the girl,

"Jinx, you'll have an off day today for the sake of (Y/N)'s health," He wouldn't let you get a word of protest in as she quickly ran over to the two of you, taking a small pouch that clinked with coins that he had on him, and nodded, "I need you to get something for (Y/N) to eat, and make sure it's not made of pure fat or sugar," He called after the overexcited girl as she put her shoes on, yelling an okay, and leaving your home slamming your door shut. You winced at the noise and slowly followed after Silco to your kitchen,

"You don't have to... Do all that," You grumbled, rubbing your eyes and blinking wide to try and encourage your exhausted body to stay awake, "You don't have to look after me,"

"Evidently, it appears I have to," He said with a sigh. This wasn't entirely a sign of disappointment, it was also mixed with care. You blinked in surprise at a mug of tea being placed in front of you, having clearly dozed off for a moment. Silco gave you another stern look, causing you to mumble a thank you and take a sip, "What caused you to stay up so late?" He asked curiously,

"Oh, I remembered I had lots of scrap metal and instead of letting it go to waste, I thought maybe I should try to make something with it," You said with a sigh, moving to sit on one of the tall seats, resting your elbows on the table, "Nothing fancy mind you, I was just inspired by Jinx. You remember how she started teaching me how to draw?" He nodded, "I decided I was going to be creative and start to weld or uh... Create one with the metal. I got really close to finishing it and then you guys showed up," you explained, "It was supposed to be a private project, I guess. But I'm guessing she's already seen it," You sighed softly, eyes closing again,

"Mhm," It really didn't help that his voice was so smooth and soft, and his speaking right now could just lull you to sleep, right here at the table, "(Y/N)?" He asked, a hand coming to rest on your shoulder. You opened your eyes, hooded and almost closing again. Truly, you were exhausted, "Hey, stay awake until Jinx gets back and you eat something," He requested you, and you groaned softly,

"Fine, but you need to do something to me to keep me awake," You said, watching him for a moment as he considered your words,

"Alright. Do you have any questions you want to ask me?" You raised your brows,

"Really?" He nodded, "You're going to be open and vulnerable with me?" You asked, your playful tone being dimmed slightly by tiredness lacing the words together. He chuckled at that,

"No, just because you said that I'm banning you from asking any questions,"

"Noooo," You whined, "But you're oh so dramatic and so mysterious that my mind is constantly perplexed by the myriad of mysteries that surrounds you," You said, lazily falling your hands in the air. Hearing Silco's genuine laugh pleasantly surprised you. It had been years, you thought since he'd laughed so freely,

"Myriad of mysteries?" He repeated, the amusement still clear in his tone, "My, my, dear," He shook his head, "I've no idea where you got that from- you must be very sleep-deprived,"

"That's what happens when you don't sleep," You announced, "I made the connection,"

"I made the connection," He said, causing you to whine in response, as he simply shook his head with a small chuckle, walking away from the counter, "Let's go see what you were working on," He said, watching you slide off the seat and walk to him. He stuck out his arm a little, and when you look at him in confusion, he just glanced down at his outstretched arm. Looping your arm with his and letting him lead you to your dimly lit workshop, you let out another yawn, too tired to let your body react to his touch. His touch...

He stopped at your workbench, clattered with spare parts, crews, various tools, and one metal fish in the middle of the chaos. Sleepily, you watched him pick it up with his free hand,

"Oh don't even look at it. It's not finished, it still needs the details," A yawn broke your sentence and you gently let your headrest on his shoulder, "I'm considering scrapping it anyways,"

"Don't do that," He said quickly, and looking up at him, you noticed he was inspecting it delicately and with high interest. The fish's movements were articulated and floppy, behaving like a real fish, but the metal parts clinked whenever the fish was moved. He hummed softly, impressed, letting go of you and moving its open bottom jaw to touch the top, watching it swing back open as he took his fingers off the metal, "(Y/N) you clearly put a lot of effort into this. You can't just throw it away," He said, looking down at you, leaning against the workbench and facing him,

"If you love the fish so much, keep it," You said, and watched him raise his brows,

"I will. Thank you," He said, glancing up as he heard a knock on your door and momentarily leaving you. Jinx soon appeared, followed closely by Silco who indicated for you to follow him to the kitchen and disappeared. Jinx ran to you, excitedly,

"(Y/N) I really like your fish!" she told you happily, and you noticed she was the one now holding it. Clearly, a trade of sorts had occurred between her and Silco as he let her back in, "I'd like for you to teach me how to make fish like this," she asked politely,

"Mhm," You hummed, patting her head, "Sure. You know, your dad's the one keeping it," She blinked at your words,  "I don't like it that much. Once I sleep, and if we have enough free time, I'll show you. You've been doing well in your classes anyway so, you deserve a fun break," You said, walking to the door,

"Silco's... My dad?" She asked sweetly, her voice barely above a whisper. You looked down at her and nodded your head,

"Hell yeah, kid," You smiled at her, "He cares about you like you're his daughter- anyone can see that," You said, patting her head again gently as you walked to the kitchen, looking at the plate of food sat before you. Before he could command you to eat, you found the smell had already done its work of awakening your dormant hunger, and you quickly ate your breakfast. Once you were done, he set your plate in the sink and rounded the table again,

"Let's get you to bed," His voice was soft again and you enjoyed it, accompanied by his touch guiding you back to your room, the fatigue settling in. He helped you to bed, offering to help you change but as you groaned tiredly into the sheets, he laughed,

"I'll take that as no. Goodnight, (Y/N)," He said, standing up and leaving you to get a good days rest. Before your body willingly submitted to its exhaustion, you heard the faint click of a door, as well as murmurs of Jinx and Silco's voices, but you couldn't make them out. You let them lull you to sleep.

A few weeks had passed. When Silco dropped Jinx off at your home today, he seemed like his usual self, giving you a nod and asking that once your lessons were finished, to come to 'The Last Drop' and meet him there. Your lesson went by smoothly: you tried out new ideas for bombs, helped Jinx with whatever she needed, and allowed yourself to end early, showing her how to make creatures out of scrap metal. She took off to welding, cutting and creating her own under your supervision until eventually, she produced a creature,

"Oh Woah-" You smiled, picking it up and looking it over, "-Jinx you're so good at this. It always astonishes me to see how fast you just... Pick up on things," You complimented her, before handing her sculpture back,

"And watch this," You completely missed the wind-up key on its back, and that at some point she had just put this mechanism in. You watched as she cranked it, letting the creature hop around the desk in a circle, "It does that for thirty seconds and then boop," She smiled as it rattled to a halt, "He stops," You smiled proudly,

"Good work Jinx! It'll be something you can show Silco," You added,

"My dad," She quickly corrected, making your heart warm, "He's my dad now," she clarified,

"Course. Let me get dressed and then I'll take you back home," You said, moving to your bedroom and changing out of your apron and workshop clothes, the smell of smoke and chemicals leaving you and being replaced by cleaner clothes in your usual style. You let yourself reflect on how things were before with Jinx and Silco. They really accepted each other as their respective family members and it was wholesome to see how close they got in such a short time. You couldn't help but think about where you fit into this mix...

With a sigh, you willed the thoughts out of your head and finished getting ready. Fixing up a necklace as you left your room you looked to Jinx, smiling softly at the creature in her hands and inspecting it, "Let's go," you told her, making her look up at you with a nod.

Your walk with her was filled with easy chatter between you two, Jinx mostly expressing her excitement in creating a new creature tomorrow, informing you the one in her hands was a sharp-mouthed bird called 'Dino', and asking you about the mechanisms necessary for more articulation. Before long, the two of you made it inside 'The Last Drop' and looked around for any sign of Silco or Sevika. Considering neither of them were here to take Jinx off your hands, the two of you moved to the bar and ordered some juice. Jinx happily asked more questions, which you eagerly answer, until eventually she became too tired of talking and with a small sigh scanned the place for Silco. It was getting late- he was always on time, and was usually able to predict whenever he'd be late and tell you. With a dissatisfied hum, you watched the young child walk confidently to one of Silco's henchmen,

"Hey," She asked, her hands going to her hips to appear tougher, likely seeing Silco doing the same. You watched as he slowly looked down at the girl, pausing his task of washing down the table, "D'you know where Silco is?" She asked. You watched him intensely, raising your brows as he looked to you, and then back to her,

"He left," is all he said, before going back to cleaning the tables in the area. You didn't expect someone who just worked under Silco, and in a bar, he just happened to take over, would know exactly where he was. It was still little that he wasn't here. If this henchman knew Silco was in his office, he wouldn't lie. Not to Jinx's face. It was actually quite funny to you- how a lot of these people were afraid of such a small kid who at first glance happened to have no power. Simply being Silco's daughter earned her respect. With a grimace, you watched Jinx return with her head hung and a frown on her face. She grabbed her cup, taking a long sip through her straw,

"I wonder where he is..." She said sadly to you, swinging her legs on the stool. You watched her, not used to this quiet, in-her-head Jinx. To try cheer her up, you spoke,

"Hey, I'm sure he's fine. Just running a little bit late," You said softly, "How about we go back to my house and hang out there while we wait for him?" You offered, "You know you can't be here when the night's parties start," You said with a small sigh, watching her nod

"But what if he comes back and gets mad we're not here?" She asked worriedly,

"Then we can just tell someone we were here but went back to wait for him," You said, glancing to the bartender, "Hey," You called the bartender's attention, "Can you tell Silco when he comes back that (Y/N) and Jinx are waiting for him back at my home?" You said, biting your tongue to stop the smile threatening to grace your lips at the implications of the phrase. The bartender simply nodded, going back to washing glasses, "See? Now he'll know we're not in danger or trouble. Come on," You beckoned, setting your empty glass on the counter and standing, offering her your hand. She took it, walking out with her juice still in hand.

Returning home, you tried to think of ways to distract her, proving difficult. The first thing that came to your mind is offering to show her how to make a different creature but she just shook her head. Glancing around your home again, you offered to bake with her,

"We can make cupcakes this time?" You said, smiling, "It's like a cake but in these paper wrappers. They're smaller than a whole cake, and you hold them in your hand and ear. Or we could make another cake-"

"(Y/N), did he leave me here?" You were surprised to see her hugging herself and avoiding your gaze. Her voice quivered as she spoke, "Did he... Did he go?" she asked quieter, your heart breaking for the child,

"Jinx no-" Your eyes grew wider as she visibly flinched at your words, taking a step back as you stepped closer to try and comfort her. "He... Look," You paused, staying where you were and crouching to be level with her, watching tears spill down her cheeks as she pressed the bottom of her palm against her eyes to try to halt them, "Silco sometimes gets very busy with his work, you know this. Just because he's late doesn't mean-"

"He's never late," She interjected sharply, and you nodded in acknowledgement to the strange circumstances,

"I know. It is weird- he's usually very punctual. Maybe he got caught up on something," you told her,

"What if he got hurt?" She asked worriedly crying openly now. You felt helpless, she was clearly trapped in her mind, thoughts spiralling, "What if he never wants to see me again? Like Vi?" Who was Vi? For a moment, you didn't know what to say, staring blankly at the girl. You had to calm her down, stop this train of thought from snowballing more,

"I don't know what happened to him," You said truthfully, "But I know Silco is strong. He might not look like it- to be honest, he kinda looks like a rat-" this made her laugh, good, "-but I promise you that he's good at protecting himself and those around him," You assured her, "I grew up with him remember? He protected me, he'll do the same for you," You watched her consider your words,

"So he'll come back to me?" she asked, her voice was quiet again. You nodded with a reassuring smile,

"Of course he will," You affirmed, "He came back for me. He'll do the same with you," you said, watching as she whipped the tears from her face into her forearms, taking a breath to calm herself. She was quiet for a bit, before speaking up

"As much as I want to try a cupcake... I just want to draw now," she said, to which smiled. Good, she was calm,

"Course," You said, "Go to the living room I'll get some paper," you said, leaving to your storage closet, digging around for some paper and crayons that you kept on hand for her. You smiled softly, noticing the drawing pad you bought her a while ago but forgot about. The few times you had noticed it, you made mental notes to give her the pad but always forgot. Considering she was still down, you knew this would be the perfect time, "Hey Jinx?" you called her attention, walking to your living room where she now sat on the floor in front of your coffee table. She looked up at you with her large grey eyes in curiosity as you placed the pad in front of her,

"What's this?" She asked, flipping through the empty pages confused,

"It's a place for you to keep all your drawings," You told her, and she smiled so brightly it lit up the room again, "So instead of having all these loose pages they're all confined in here and easy to keep track of. Hang on, I might have some glue you can use if you want to stick anything in," You left, and when you returned you saw she was already occupied with her doodles. Deeming this a safe enough distraction, you moved off to the kitchen to make yourself some tea, as well as a hot chocolate for her.

Silco was late. Very late. Usually, he would be able to predict being an hour or two late. Today he didn't tell you anything about not being on time. He rarely discussed business with you, only ever responding that it's 'good' and not giving you more information. Today, he was almost five hours late. 'The Last Drop' would be opening up by now, with no sign of its host. Nervously tapping your fingers in time with the clock ticking handles, you waited for the kettle and at the cup of milk in a pot on your stove to boil. What was going on? Perhaps Jinx was right to worry so much. You had told him it was no problem for you to watch over her here, where it was safe when his work got a bit too chaotic or dangerous for a child. You would have greatly appreciated a word of warning before, though. Rejoining her again at the table, now trying to now quell your own bubbling thoughts of worry, you gave her a small tight smile as she thanked you for the hot chocolate,

"(Y/N)?" she asked, picking up the blue crayon to now draw with, "You grew up with him, right?" She looked at you. With a confirming nod, she continued, "What was that like?"

"Oh! It was uhm..." You said, raking your brain for any stories you could tell her that were... appropriate, "It was nice. One night, on my birthday, he took me up to Piltover to show me the stars and-"

"I know that one," She said, surprising you, "He tells it to me a lot. He says that was the happiest he's ever seen you," You blushed softly, taking a sip of your tea,

"Huh.. Well, that's nice to hear," You said, with a smile,

"Tell me another one," She demanded, stopping colouring to focus on you entirely, arms crossing over the book as she leaned forward in intrigue,

"Another?" You asked, and watched as she nodded,

"A story I haven't heard," She added,

"You're gonna have to help me out here, kid- I don't know what you know and don't," you said, making her giggle,

"Hmm... I know the star one, I know his eye one, I know the rooftop one-"

"You know what happened to his eye?" you asked. He told her the story of how he lost his eye? Considering how literal Silco was, you feared how many details he had told her,

"Yeah. He said that Vander was his brother, and they had a fight and he almost drowned. His eye was badly messed up and the chemicals in the water made it go bad. Then you saved him and then he went to the scientist in the underground lab," you stared at her in alarm, noticing how casually she told the story, "It was a boring story. He just kept talking and talking and I fell asleep," you laughed nervously,

"And you know the rooftop one?" you asked, and she nodded,

"He took you to a rooftop and you were scared to go down," You blushed,

"I just kept thinking I was gonna fall," She explained, and were surprised she nodded with understanding,

"For a while, I kept thinking monsters would take me away and eat me," She said, "But Silco said he'd kill the monsters if they ever tried to come for me," You nodded,

"Yes, that sounds like him," you let yourself take another sip,

"Tell me a story then!" She demanded, eagerly now, causing you to laugh again at her insistence and went back to searching your brain, staying quiet for a moment. You could feel her eyes on you,

"Hmm.. Has he told you about the knife?" You asked, and smiled softly as she shook her head,

"No, tell me, tell me!" She asked enthusiastically, making you laugh,

"Alright. Back when Silco and I were younger, we mostly worked in the mines all day. We weren't that close yet, but we knew about each other. The mines were a lot of hard, dangerous work. We'd see our friends getting hurt every day because of the machinery, the rocks, the tight passages and toxic chemicals. We didn't have anyone to protect us from that, so we had to protect and rely on each other. That closeness brought us all together. At some point, a few of us got tired of being down there, breathing those chemicals in all day and being treated horribly. Only thing was, if we wanted to leave the mines, we would be left without a job, money, and a home. Our only option to survive was to turn to crime," You explained, "Silco and I got close then. We made a reputation for ourselves- a bad one. In the beginning, it was simple muggings and petty theft. In those times, the Uppersiders would just turn up in certain areas they claimed as their own. And if you were as charming as Silco, you could hold their attention long enough for someone like me to snatch a few coins or expensive nicknacks they had in their pockets" You said with a wink, "One day, someone caught on to what we were doing and demanded we gave them their things back. If we did, it was likely we wouldn't be able to feed ourselves, so of course, we said no. In hindsight, maybe we should have just run away... We didn't know they bought any backup and fighting four against two was never gonna work out well," You grimaced, "Being the tough guy he is, Silco took on the largest guy. I thought I could trick the other three and get them to chase a blind trail, then go back and help Silco. What I would do is find plates that looked golden, and widdled them down to resemble coins. From far away, they were quite convincing. Only when you looked up close, you could tell they were fake. I grabbed a handful and threw them away, before running in the opposite direction. Unfortunately, only one of them bought it, the other two doubled down and blocked me into a corner. At that point in my life, I didn't know how to fight correctly, let alone defend myself. We were still in our early thieving days, no one had taught me, and Silco was just a kid I happened to work with. One of them had a knife and I got stabbed in the side in the scuffle. I made a big show of falling to the floor, and I guess once these assholes realised they had hurt a child, they ran off. Silco found me and bought me to this shared home we had- there were about twenty kids there already- and he was the only one I knew. He told me it was a good thing that knife was dull and I was able to move too quickly because I wasn't seriously hurt. But then he told me no one had ever sacrificed themselves for him like that. I guess that's when we started trusting each other with our lives. We slept in the same room, often sharing clothes and possessions. For a while, it was me, him, Vander, and a few other kids our age. We slept further away from them, closer to a door and window. I... Had a lot of issues sleeping when I was younger-"

"Like nightmares?" Up until now, she had listened intently, not asking any questions,

"Uhm... Maybe? Finding a home was difficult- considering we weren't working anymore our superiors kicked us out to the Lanes. I didn't know Silco well enough when we left, so I was sleeping on the streets alone for long enough that I became too restless and attentive," You said, "I was always scared someone would hurt or steal from me. Silco found me, saying he recognised me from the mines and asked if I needed a home. The rent was very cheap- I'm always thankful for... Agh, I can't remember her name," You put a hand to your forehead, sighing as the name escaped you, "She let a lot of kids stay with her for very cheap. She was a kind woman. Kinder than she needed to be," You said, smiling fondly, "Anyway- on the nights I couldn't fall asleep, Silco thought the best way to help me was to tire me out. We'd sneak out outside and chase through the lanes, or find interesting places to hang out in until we grew tired and went back home. The knife was probably a gift for my sixteen or seventeenth birthday. He showed me this scrap of fabric- a fancy one too, clearly from an uppersider who wasn't careful- and said he got something for me. It was this small switchblade. He'd carved out initials into it, and then for the rest of the night, he taught me how to use it," You smiled, reminiscing the memories of your younger selves, "Well that was until we got too tired and had to go back home," You said, "Stars, that feels so long ago now..." You sighed,

"It sounds very lovely," She smiled brightly, "Do you still have it?"

"Of course! I couldn't possibly throw it away," Your smile matched hers, "It was such a special gift- here give me a second," You quickly left to your bedroom to retrieve it, not realising the spring in your step. It was located in the drawers next to your bed, ready to be grabbed at any moment in case you felt unsafe, even if it was still unsharpened. Before coming back, you took a short detour to your storage closet, grabbing the glue you promised her a while ago. Returning, you set the knife down in front of her, and placed the glue nearby "There," Jinx took the knife, looking over it curiously, her fingers running over your roughly etched letters, and finally setting it down,

"I think it's a really nice gift," She said happily,

"It is," You agreed, and as she asked you for another, you gave a small sigh, racking your brain once again.

You were thankful Jinx was a heavy sleeper.  Just as you were exiting the spare bedroom you set up for her to sleep in for the night, you jumped at the sudden pounding on your front door, startled. Grabbing the switchblade from your coffee table, you approached the door, opening it slightly with your weapon ready. You likely wouldn't do a lot of damage, but at least you were armed,

"Silco!" You exclaimed in surprise, gasping softly and moving to the side as he stormed inside, looking around wildly. Something wasn't right. He stood still, scanning your apartment momentarily, eventually settling his on you,

"Where's Jinx?" He asked. He was dishevelled clearly- strands of hair hanging over his forehead and sticking to the accumulated sweat there, eye wide, making him resemble a dear caught in the lights. The intense expression on his face conveyed fear and showed you he was alert. There were tear tracks that caught in your overhead lighting. Had he been crying?

"In the spare room- Silco what's-" You barely got your sentence in when he gracefully, yet rapidly moved to the room you mentioned and entered. You heard Jinx's happy exclamation of 'Dad!', and slowly moved to the door to watch as Silco dropped to his knees near her bed, embracing her tightly. He appeared to be shaking slightly,

"Where were you? I was worried you left me o-or got hurt," You heard Jinx say, sounding like she was on the brink of tears or crying already,

"I just had a few things to attend to," His voice was soft; but it was evident to you he was trying to sound sure of himself and not worry her anymore, "Forgive me. I didn't realise the time," His body betrayed him. He was shaking like a leaf, alarmed, or frightened by something unknown. Something that had happened to him. Suddenly feeling like an intruder, you made yourself useful and went to your kitchen, deciding to make some more tea would allow them more time alone, and you to collect yourself. As you put the kettle on, you noticed your heart beating rapidly in your chest and placed a hand over it as if to steady it.

Silco was unharmed and safe, but clearly scared. This was good and strange, and so unusual it was unsettling. Moments later, Silco emerged again, quietly shutting the door behind him. You turned your head to watch as the man stooped slightly, bending down to press his forehead to the door momentarily, his hand still resting on the door handle. You watched his eyes squeezing shut, and his lips mumble something, before he straightened and looked to you, catching your gaze. His red eye gleamed in the now dark room, and you could only see his outline. As he joined you in the kitchen, standing near you, his features were illuminated by your bright kitchen lights.

He reached for your warm mug, bringing the tea to his lips and taking a long drink, before setting the cup down and looking at his hands that now rested against the counter. You heard the mug clink as he set it down, and didn't miss how it shook slightly in his hand. Was it best to ask him anything, or just sit in silence and let him work out whatever was going on on his own?

He didn't speak, just stood there, frozen in place and staring at a spot on your counter. His hands were pressed hard into the table, fists balled up. You could see a few veins in his skinny arms, and you realised he wasn't wearing his usual long jacket. His sleeves were rolled up, allowing you to just stare. He wasn't shaking anymore, but his breaths were audible. Slowly, you moved away from the counter, deciding it was best to leave him to his thoughts. You were surprised to hear the rustle of clothes, and you turned your head, seeing him stand and follow you,

"I... Thought you wanted to be alone," you explained, standing at your bedroom door,

"No," He said sharply, his voice low and breathy, panicked. Blinking rapidly, you glanced towards your room and bit your lip, "I don't want to be alone," His voice was a whisper, afraid if anyone else heard they'd view him as weak. Your eyes grew wide in shock and fear. You hated how mysterious he was in moments like this when all you desperately wanted him to be blunt and honest with what he wanted from you,

"Okay," You said, "Well.. I'm gonna go on the landing outside," You said, watching as he nodded. You led him through your room and prayed he wouldn't notice or ask about the apron or pile of clothes on your bed. You stopped at a door, opening it to let light into the dark place, and stepped out onto an open landing that had two chairs, a table, and an ashtray full of ash and cigarette butts looking over the gothic underground city. Watching as he slowly followed you and surveyed the area, his gaze focused on the small tables only item. Moving to a withered plant pot off to the side, you produced a box of cigarettes, offering him one. A light chuckle emitted from him as he took one, inspecting it. He was clearly relaxing again,

"You still smoke these?" He asked bemused, and you smiled as you put them back, grabbing a lighter,

"Hey, not everyone can afford Piltover's finest cigars," You said, lighting the end for him as he put it to his lips, "And not all the time. Only when I need to relax," You noticed the slight tremor in his hand as he moved it away from his mouth, exhaling the smoke,

"Star's, that's horrible," He said with a grimace, looking over the cigarette in his hand and handing it to you and sitting in one of the chairs. You laughed, moving to occupy the other,

"You get used to it," you said, glancing back at him, seeing a small smile of recognition on his lips. With a small sigh, he leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees, and put his face in his hands, rubbing over his face. His smile quickly faded, his expression turning serious as he turned his gaze up,

"I'm not usually late like this," He began, glancing at you,

"We were both getting worried..." You admitted, watching him intently, "What happened?" You asked bravely, "We went to 'The Last Drop' and you weren't there... I asked the bartender to let you know we came back here," He nodded his head again,

"Do you have any alcohol?" He asked, and you nodded. Walking by him to get back inside, you were surprised when he reached out and grabbed your hand. Stopping, you watched him take the cigarette from your hand, bringing it to his lips and leaning his head back in the chair, hands drifting to rest between his legs. You left and came back quickly, trading the bottle for the cigarette and blushing at the feeling of his soft, slender fingers against yours for a second. For a moment he said nothing, and the longer you sat in silence, letting the cigarette burn out, the more you realised you'd likely overstepped an unspoken boundary. Looking down, you readied an apology. Instead, you heard the liquid moving against the glass bottle, a few gulps, and then the clink of the glass as it was set back down,

"The deal got called off," He spoke lowly, his voice rough, his tone turning bitter as you turned to focus on him, "I lost six barrels of Shimmer to some children. They ambushed us out of nowhere on some... Floating boards and burned our product.  The buyer called off the deal, and wanted to have me killed until Sevika put him in his place," He said, anger clear in his tone. A chill ran down your spine as you thought about the implications, "Then we went back. And..." he trailed off, going quiet again. You noticed his shaking hands clench and unclench, nervously. This was strange for him, "Something happened then..." He nodded, taking another long swig,

"And it took you longer to get back," He nodded again at your words. Without asking more you lifted the cigarette to your lips and inhaled the smoke, thinking of what to say as your gaze turned skywards, "did-"

"No, (Y/N). Let me finish," He interrupted sternly, prompting you to shut your lips. He took another swig, before beginning again, "Zaun has always been a violent place... I know that," He was clearly trying to reason with himself, "You see people getting beaten all the time in the Lanes; in the streets. And the enforcers are getting more brutal every day," He sighed deeply, "I thought it was her," He shook his head, "Jinx," He elaborated, "That somehow, she had gotten out and was looking for me. Those enforcers found her and were killing her," his hands were clenched so hard his knuckles were white against his already pale skin, "I was already pissed off, and seeing that I... I killed them," Your eyes widened at his confession, and he let out a sigh, "It was just a girl with blue hair... Just a fucking kid..." He said emotionally. Shaking his head again and downing the rest of your bottle with a groan, he set it near his feet on the floor "Marcus will..." He groaned, "Fuck," He hissed, leaning back in the chair and placing his hands over his eyes in frustration. Blinking rapidly, you really didn't know how to respond.

The first time you bore witness to Silco killing someone was an accident. He'd been scammed by some kid thinking he was being clever during a card game. As soon as Silco realised, he flew into a rage, and the other kid ran off. You followed them, nervous and knowing what would happen during Silco's violent episodes. When you caught up to the two, the kid was trying to fight back. Trying their best to stay alive. Only moments later, they were on the ground, begging for mercy and offering to give back the money they stole. Silco wasn't listening- so enraged nothing was getting through to him. Only when you dragged him off, did you realise the extent of the damage. You ran so fast your lungs burned and bile rose in your throat, realising what had happened. Neither of you told Vander at first- even though he could tell something was wrong with how unusually quiet the two of you were- until you tearfully confessed. He simply grunted and told you both to 'grow up'. Silco took that to heart. You, on the other hand, didn't.

"I- Silco you can't just kill people because-"

"I thought it was her," He said exasperated, looking at you with desperation clear in his face, "I thought they found Jinx, and they were going to take her away from me," By now, your cigarette had completely burned out, and you placed it into your ashtray. With a slight shake of your head, you sighed, "(Y/N) I promise you I wouldn't have done it without good reason," He said, running a hand through his hair, "I couldn't stand by and let them hurt her like that,"

"I... Silco that doesn't justify murder," You said with a deep frown,

"You think I don't know that?" He laughed coldly, watching you, "Marcus will surely want to know what happened. I can't just tell him it was because I thought my daughter was getting attacked," He sighed deeply, silence falling between you two as you thought. 'My daughter'. The first time he had referred to her as so,

"Perhaps..." You spoke quietly, "Perhaps, you can...?" You said, making him turn his attention back to you,

"You want me to lie to him?" He asked,

"It would save you and Jinx wouldn't it? Or help your case," You said with a frown. You watched him consider and sigh, "The enforcers made a mistake and tried to hurt you. You were simply protecting yourself and her... Or just blame it on the growing violence of the Lanes," he grimaced,

"That won't help, he knows I'm responsible for that," He shook his head, resting his elbows back on his knees, "He's already covering up my affiliation with the Shimmer. I think it'll be more difficult to cover up the random deaths of five enforcers,"

"Maybe it won't be," You said, trying to help, "Random, right? Someone got a little too high, or drunk, and killed them. No witnesses means no suspects, right?" You said, "And considering your position, no one will accuse you if they want to stay alive... Also, who in Zaun would want to help Marcus, of all people?" He watched you curiously,

"I forget how sharp you are sometimes," He muttered, "I'll see... He'll contact me inevitably. Thank you for the help," He said, "All that matters to me now is that Jinx is safe here with you," He said with a solemn nod, which you copied,

"You know I'd never let anything happen to her... Your daughter," You assured him, and he nodded,

"I should have guessed it wasn't her considering you weren't with her," He said, looking to you. He went quiet then, suddenly lost somewhere in his head,

"Are you going to take her home?" You finally asked, "Or will you stay here? I can set the couch up and sleep there while you take my bed," You offered. Silco just sighed deeply,

"(Y/N), we've shared a bed before. And this is your house. If anyone were to take the couch, it would be me," He said bluntly, and you blushed at his words, "And no. Thank you, but I'll take her home. Thank you for looking after her," He said, and although you were disappointed that he wouldn't stay, his words meant so much to you. He trusted you. Clearly there, this meant he trusted you.

"Oh," Is all you said, nodding. He stood, and you followed after him, "I really wouldn't mind you staying," You repeated, in hopes of changing his mind. This was near impossible, with him being so stubborn,

"Goodnight, (Y/N)," He said softly, exhaustion clear in his voice. There was no more use trying to convince him. He let you enter first and closed the door behind you, filling the room with darkness again.

"Hey... Why'd you ask me to come here so early?" You frowned as you stepped into Silco's home, looking around the empty room.

The following morning, at an ungodly hour, you had awoken to Sevika knocking on your door and telling you had a day off. She then told you Silco wanted to see you as soon as you were awake, and gave you thirty minutes. She remained in your living room sitting on your couch and dwarfing it. Sevika exuded power, and it took everything in you not to thirst over how attractive this woman was. The few times she had caught you ogling her muscles were embarrassing, but she'd smirk and you acknowledged you clearly fueled her ego. Once you were done, you blushed as she complimented your outfit, letting out a sharp laugh and escorting you to his home. It was only ten minutes away from yours, and you noticed a few of his henchmen around the area guarding it discretely.

Met with silence, you tried again, "Silco?" you called out, glancing around the living room. The walls were full of Jinx's drawings, stuck to the wall, a few framed, and many others strewn across the floor and table, along with crayons. The only neat thing was the neon markers that lay on the table, organised in rainbow order. You smiled as you saw the fish you had made was decorated and glowing neon, clearly decorated with her favourite markers, and placed on a shelf with a few other knickknacks. Everything else was high quality and miraculously untouched by Jinx's chaos and markers. You turned sharply, hearing the door creak behind you, seeing a sleepy Jinx shutting the door behind you, and struggling to reset the three locks on it. You quickly moved and helped her, before looking down, "Hi Jinx. Good to see you this morning. Do you know where Silco is?" You asked her

"He's in there," she pointed to a door down a long hall with her free hand, the other holding on to the paw of a stuffed bunny "He told me to tell Sevika to come and get you... And now I'm going back to sleep," You watched her cross the room and flop on the pale couch, turning away from you and hugging the bunny tightly. Smiling and whispering a thank you, you walked to the door she indicated. Following up yesterday's conversation, you had wanted to check on Silco regardless to make sure he was alright. You were thankful when he had asked for you to join him, even in the early hours of the morning. Slowly, you knocked,

"Silco? It's me, (Y/N)," You announced, and heard him sigh through a 'come in' behind the door.

Entering you glanced around the neat room. Green light flooded through the window, illuminating his bed and Silco himself, sitting before you with one hand on his forehead, the other clenched tightly, resting against his bouncing knee. He was nervous. His gaze turned upwards to look at you, but quickly he looked back down to his hand. In the dim lights, you couldn't see his features clearly,

"Good morning," You told him with a small smile, to which he only nodded. Sure he wasn't talkative but him being almost silent was new, "Uhm. Sevika and Jinx said you wanted to see me?" You told him, and watched him nod again. He stood from where he was, hands still clenching together tightly as he slowly paced,

"It appears I'm still suffering from the... events that occurred yesterday," the first words he said to you this morning. You tilted your head as you watched him expectantly. He came to a stop near you, turning the lights on and lifting his hands slightly "My hands haven't stopped shaking," He said, and you could detect a hint of embarrassment in his tone. Gently, you looked to his trembling hands, taking them in your own, hoping to comfort him. Your fingers interlocked, and you felt him release a shaky breath, "Ah... Right," He mumbled, "I was hardly able to..." You didn't miss how his gaze flicked to his bedside cabinet, where a cylindrical object was placed. What was that for? "I can't fix the scarring around my eye," He finally said.

Looking up at his face and focusing, you could clearly notice a change in his appearance. Not only were the scars surrounding his eye more prominent, but his skin had also blackened due to the toxicity in the waters decades ago, eroding it away. You remembered that night you saw him again in your home. In the faint light then, you recognised how he had looked the same then as he did now. You guessed he started putting on make-up to cover the extent of the damage, or for Jinx, to not scare her.  It would explain why she wasn't allowed in his room. Glancing to a small vanity table in his room, you noticed the very basics of makeup products littered on top of its surface, along with a hairbrush that still clung on to strands of Jinx's blue hair and with hair bands. You quickly understood what he required you to do,

"You need my help?" you asked him, seeking confirmation,

"Please," The softness in his voice captivated you. Granted, Silco was always more relaxed and soft around you and Jinx, but this? It reminded you of him soothing you at night after a nightmare, or saving you from a particularly dangerous fight. To tell the truth, when you saw him again almost a year ago, you weren't sure if the man you used to know was still there. This was all the proof you needed. You nodded with a silent smile, letting go of him as he moved over to the vanity, getting the products he usually used and handing them back to you. You didn't miss how his touch lingered on your hands before he sat back on the bed and watched you expectantly.

You opened his compact, catching a glimpse of your own face in the small mirror and gently dipping the included pad in the pale-coloured product on the other side. Leaning in close to him, you began to cover the darkened skin but realised you were in an uncomfortable position. With a small breath, you moved to lean one leg on the bed, brushing it involuntarily against his own. You could feel his steady breaths fanning against your face and neck as you worked on covering his skin with an even colour, a soft blush forming on your cheeks at the intimacy. You felt your skin heat up as you worked around his eye, and as you set the compact down near him, placing a hand on his left cheek to tilt his head and give yourself better access to his face, you felt like you were burning.

It took you a few minutes to make sure you had done a good job, the two of you sharing a comfortable silence as you focused on ensuring you applied an even coverage across his face. At some points, you noticed his hands were no longer shaking, and he was entirely relaxed. When you were satisfied with what you had done, you reluctantly moved back. He kept his gaze on you, before picking up the compact and opening it, examining your work with a small smile. If you weren't so focused on his slender hands, you would have missed they still shook. Only ever so slightly,

"Not bad," He said, before handing you the other item- a pencil- to draw on his eyebrow. You carefully took it from him, face falling as you took your lip between your teeth. Noticing your anxiety, he smiled, "Breathe, (Y/N). It's only an eyebrow," He said, "Try get it as even as you can. Usually, I start by dotting the most important points, then connect them with outlines, then fill the space," He said calmly,

"How'd you know how to do all this?" You asked amused, leaning back to study his existing brow, and then reaching out gently to touch his brow bone above the blackened eye. You carefully dotted the beginning of the brow, top of the arc and end of it, moving back each time to see if they were mirroring his existing brow,

"Sevika," He said plainly, and this time you pulled back from his face to stare in shock,

"Really?"

"She's surprisingly good at make up," He said, and you laughed softly, "She is," He added as you smiled, beginning to carefully connect your rough dots,

"I would have never expected it," You admitted, "She doesn't look like she wears any make-up. She's just naturally beautiful," You felt the way his face moved against your hand as he smiled again,

"Looks can be deceiving, my dear," You blushed at the term of endearment, pulling back to compare the two brows. Silco surprised you, leaning his head forwards and looking to the side into his vanity mirror. The urge to suddenly run your hands through his hair overwhelmed you, and you found yourself biting the inside of your cheek to regain some self control,

"Thank you," he said with an approving nod,

"Is it fine?" You asked nervously, looking at him. He smiled as he nodded, taking the products from your hands and standing. He looked down at you appreciatively,

"It's more than fine. Thank you. You've done more than enough for me," He said, moving by you to set them down. You smiled,

"You asked for my help. I wouldn't just ignore you," You told him truthfully, standing in the centre of his room. He was already dressed and ready in his usual fancy clothes, so he led you back to his door and opened it for you. He glanced at Jinx on the couch after following you, and sighed, "Have you eaten yet?" He asked. You watched as he took a seat next to Jinx's sleeping form, a hand gently touching her shoulder as he inspected her sleeping face. You sat on an armchair he had nearby, and shook your head,

"Sevika didn't give me a lot of time. She said your request was urgent," He nodded with a hum,

"I'll get you something to eat when Jinx wakes up," He said, "And then you'll go home and have your day off,"

"I can teach her as normal. It's no problem to me," You quickly said, but he shook his head,

"Take a day off," He repeated, "It'll do you some good," He added, and you sighed,

"Right," You didn't hide the disappointment from your voice, and looked down,

"I did want to invite you out somewhere..." He said, drawing your attention back to him in interest, "I need to discuss it with you in my office first, so be there around 5?" He said, and you nodded,

"Am I gonna get a hint as to where I'm being invited?" You asked, and he shook his head, "Fine. What should I wear then?"

"Hmm... Something you won't overheat in," He said cryptically, and when you narrowed your eyes he only smirked. Scratching his face and placing a hand to rest over the back of the couch, he spoke up again, "Frankly, I just want to see you again," You blushed at his confession, "Marcus already contacted me," He announced, surprising you. His smile was gone, and he looked up at the rafters on his ceiling,

"Seriously?" He nodded, "That fast?"

"A group of his enforcers didn't report back in the morning and their bodies were found dead in the streets (Y/N)," He reminded you with a sigh, "He wants to talk to me,"

"Good luck," You wished him,

"Yeah... But I look forward to seeing you afterwards," You blushed again and looked away this time, "I'm serious,"

"I will, I'll be there," You assured, "Just wish you'd tell me where we're doing,"

"Be patient. I think you'll like it," He said, and you smiled softly at his words. Be patient. That's what you've been doing for the past year and still, here you were on his couch, talking casually. Some days, you just wanted to grab his face and confess all those feelings you kept locked inside your chest. It was frustrating, not being able to express the love and desire you felt for him, but patience ensured you'd reconnect safely again. Patience, and slow progress...

How much longer could you take this? Time would tell.

#arcane spoilers #arcane silco #arcane league of legends #arcane netflix #arcane #silco #silco my beloved #silco x reader #volatilearcane

[silcoseye]

Volatile P2: Friend to Friend, Of Course

info: "It's been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8

WARNINGS: gender-neutral reader, violence, bomb-making, alcohol consumption, swearing, uhh idk.

haha I'm too scared to look up how to make bombs on my computer because I don't want to be put on a list so plz just accept the vague details and bullshit chemistry I'm trying my best I'm not a scientist haha... ;-;

4884 words

True to his words, two large burly men strode into your apartment, comically barely fitting in the hallway and carried your one backpack and bag.  Silco greeted you in front of the repurposed 'The Last Drop' as his eyes scanned over the two bags and you felt your cheeks blooming with embarrassment. He luckily didn't comment, and only instructed you to follow after him. Your eyes widened as he led you inside an apartment building a little far from the bar,

"Stars, Silco this is-" you found yourself at a loss for words, staring at the spacious apartment. The two men set the bags down and promptly left, leaving you alone with Silco. This living room alone was so much larger than the single room at Miss E's, and had a walk-in kitchen- complete with an oven, a stovetop, a microwave and a fridge! You hardly noticed as Silco turned away, the corners of his lips curved slightly in a smile,

"There's no mould here," He told you, heterochromatic eyes scanning the clean, empty walls as your own eyes practically sparkled with excitement. You examined all the empty cabinets, noticing they were clean of dust. Then the working fridge, and then seeing if all the burners worked. They did. Silco called your attention to a door that led to a small bathroom that had a bath and shower, along with the other bathroom necessities. The smell of bleach was a godsend as it hit your nose, indicating it was clean. Still, you smiled happily at something so basic.

The bedroom is where your two bags had been deposited, and it's where they sat on the bed, waiting. The room had a closet, a desk, a set of draws- everything. It was even illuminated by a window that was high above the ground, and let in some of the neon light from the outside. The bed was soft and springy. It even came with a fluffy blanket. Flinging yourself face-first into the soft fluff, you heard a faint chuckle from the doorway, and lifted your head slightly, surprise clear on your face as you felt the bed bounce beneath you for a moment. It's springy too. Contently, you rolled onto your back, stretching out the remaining aches in your joints and bones and letting out a long sigh.

You felt Silco's gaze on you, unmoving. Turning your head to look at your friend, you noticed he was still smiling- a rare expression for Silco, and yet one that suited him so well. He moved from where he leaned against the door and picked up one of the bags that had fallen to the floor. He didn't wear the coat anymore- he'd hung it up by the door on his way in. How kind of him. He was clearly surprised by how light this bag was, and glanced at you as he opened it,

"This is all you have? Cloth and-" He froze as you sat up, drawing your legs together to sit before him cross-legged, craning your head to look up at him,

"Places like this must cost a fortune, Silco," You said, suddenly wary of the luxury around you. Silco clearly wasn't listening, delicately unwrapping the faded material, and pulling out a switchblade from its confines, examined it. His reflection was distorted in the metal, and the blade was dull, and yet he still noticed the faint crimson glowing of his corrupted eye. The blade was so familiar to both him and you. He let his fingers graze the blade- it barely left an indent in his pads. His mouth, which had opened slightly, closed, and his gaze fell down on you, "You think I wouldn't have kept it?" You smiled, "You spent so much money on it I felt bad for throwing it out," You apparently also felt bad about throwing the wrapping- a cutting from a Piltover Gent who visited years ago, when tensions weren't so high. You reached out and took the knife from him, closing the blade back into its place, fingers tracing the "S&(N)" scratched into the side. His original carvings had been clean. These had been scratched over multiple times, but the white letters still stood out against the brown handle, refusing to disappear, "I also have the tools in here-" As you reached for the bag and pulled them out to show him, he took the wrapped tools, hearing them twinkle together, "Hey that's-"

"I got you new ones," Unwrapping them and taking one glanced caused him to nod, "These are rusted and unusable,"

"Where is all this charity coming from?" You asked in surprise, "The house, the tools. Silco is-"

"You deserve a decent quality of life," His tone was stern and soft, as usual, but still commanded your attention and silenced you, "This is what you deserve, having lived in a shithole like that myself for years, I know it's not a good place to exist. As for the tools- considering you'll be a teacher now, you need the correct equipment," He took the tools with him as he walked out of the room, lingering by the doorway and indicating with his head for you to follow,

"You never told me how much you paid for all this- I'll make it all back to you," You finally said as you followed him to yet another room. You assumed it was probably a closet at first, but as he opened the door you were once again pleasantly surprised to find a workshop there. Workbenches, new tools, metals and equipment. A blowtorch. You barely registered his knowing smile as you gravitated towards the torch, gasping as you turned it on, causing fire to roar out of the other end, "Silco!" You exclaimed in happiness, looking at him with a  bright smile,

"I would have brought you clothes as well, but unfortunately I don't know what you like,"

"I would have liked anything that you got me," You said honestly, "I've never been picky. Remember how we always liked to steal each other's sweaters that those sorry Piltover fucks would send down to us as charity?" You smiled pleasantly at the memory, "I wish I had some of those,"

"Luckily this apartment has heating- I made sure of it," He assured, "And- could you turn that off?" He asked, glancing at the torch you still had, transfixed by the flames,

"Benzo never let me touch them," You smiled, "I could only use his soldering tools,"

"There's some of those as well," He mentioned with a sigh, "About those sweaters, I can arrange-"

"Silco, do not get me anything else," you threatened quickly, "This is too much as is,"

"Stop being so humble, (Y/N)," He countered, thinking for a moment, "I'll find someone to take you shopping," He informed, watching you sigh and roll your eyes, "You can't live in those clothes. You'll get new ones..." Seeing you still unhappy, he let out his own sigh, "they don't have to be expensive. Just wearable," at this you smiled and nodded pleasantly, thanking him "I'll give you some more time to get used to this. Then you'll meet her and you can begin teaching,"

"Can you give me a week? I need to get used to all of this again," You gestured around the workshop,

"Of course. Your books should arrive tomorrow," He ignored your whining about spending too much money again, "You need a refresher don't you?" This made you fall quiet, "You won't be paying me back for this with any money- I won't hear your protests," He interrupted quickly, "You're here to teach her what you know and make sure she is safe. Do you understand?" He spoke, now serious. It was clear he cared for her greatly,

"What happened to the cold, unforgiving and untrusting Silco I grew up with?" You teased, but the curiosity was also clear in your tone. His eyes scanned your face, and he turned,

"I owe you a lot," He spoke, turning to leave, his back facing you as he stopped in the doorway. His tone was quiet. He was vulnerable, "Considering how much you did for me growing up... You deserve to be repaid. You deserve this," He spoke, making you smile warmly. Turning his head slightly to catch your expression, he rolled his eyes again, "Don't get too happy," He stressed, "Accept this. From friend to friend,"

His words made the warmth now spreading to your chest and fluttering around your stomach falter. Of course. Of course. After all, Silco had it all now. Why would he still feel like this about you so many years later? All you could do was nod, your gaze drifting to his shadow extending across the floor, "Friend to friend," You echoed, watching his form nod, and fade away along with his footsteps. You heard the jingle of keys as they were placed down, the distant ruffle of a coat, and the shutting of a door.

Friend to friend...

It had been a few weeks since you had moved in and frankly, you were still getting used to this new way of life. Relearning and reengaging in the technology brought you more joy than you had expected, and it took a phenomenal amount of self-control to not read more and tinker on into the late hours of the night. Luckily, you still had the skills necessary to weld, screw and remember the basics. The chemicals you requested arrived quickly, no thanks to Silco's influence, and all it took was a little practice to get back into the swing of things. Once you had informed Silco that you thought you were ready, he told you he would bring over the girl.

"Her name is Jinx," He said, and even after knowing her for such a short time, the hint of pride in his voice was unmissable.

Your gaze travelled down to the young girl, clutching at his leg to try and hide. From what you could see, her blue hair was unkempt and was let loose, the wavy texture indicating it was usually worn in a braid. Her grey eyes were wide with a mixture of curiosity and fear, as she glanced up at you. The moment your eyes met with hers she moved slightly behind Silco, her eyes darting around the apartment. She was in an unfamiliar place of course. That was always terrifying,

"Hello there, Jinx" You bent down with what you hoped was a pleasant smile to the girl, but you couldn't help notice her wince at the name. It confused you momentarily, but you carried on, "My name is (Y/N). Silco asked me to teach you a few things. He says you're very smart," You watched the girl nod timidly, "Wanna show me what you can do?" You asked again and watched as she glanced up uncertainly at Silco.

The Silco you remembered hated any form of physical affection. The Silco you remembered didn't care for any child that joined your rebellious group. The Silco you remembered was untrusting of anyone he met, always paranoid they would double-cross him. The Silco you remembered was never be caring and loving to anyone.

And yet when you looked up at those calm features, giving the girl a confirming, comforting nod, your view on him somehow changed. Somehow, it also filled you with hope. In that simple gesture, he told her you were a person of trust. And she listened- taking her hands from around him and hesitantly stepping closer to you, her own eyes scanning your still empty apartment in a similar expression of astonishment. He had only known her for a few weeks, you guessed. And yet he trusted and cared for her as if he had known her for a long time. She looked to him for guidance already. You knew people were always capable of change- greater, lesser, it didn't matter. It was still change. Silco had changed... Certainly for the better.

You led the girl to your workshop, turning the lights on for her and showed her to your clearest workbench, dragging a stool over with your foot she she could sit atop it. You produced the basic materials to make a bomb out of the storage area that had been stocked a few days ago and set them before her. Silco stood nearby, arms folded as he watched the two of you. His face was unreadable, but his eyes held a curiosity,

"Alright here," You said, placing the final bag of chemicals down, "Show me what you can do," You said. You watched as at first as she tentatively reached for the metal and the chemicals. She didn't measure- that's something you noticed quickly. She made do with what she had and didn't know what to do with an abundance of items. How familiar. She knew how to work a screwdriver, and she knew which substances to use. In the hands of someone inexperienced, perhaps you would fear for your life, but seeing Silco's own unwavering composure eased your fears. Finally, she set it down, her hands falling to her lap once she was complete,

"I... I like to put colours in them," It was the first thing she said. It reminded you she was a child. A child you had just asked to build you a bomb. With a tilt of your head, you moved back to the storage area, taking a few powdered paints and setting them down for her. Carefully, she tipped the blue into the opening and set it back down. She looked to you expectantly, as did Silco, "Did I do good?" She asked with a frown.

Examining the bomb once more, closely this time, you nodded, being careful when you set it down. The faintest smile appeared on her face, which seemed to light up,

"It's perfectly contstructed- you were very careful with the chemicals and know your way with tools. Your only problem-" you didn't miss the way her face fell as you began the sentence, becoming a pout, and a crease forming between her brow, "-is you didn't measure the chemicals correctly," You said. Taking the bomb and passing the end over a candle on the bench, you threw it to the ground, making it clink against the hard floor. At this, Jinx gasped, sliding off the stool and moving to Silco quickly, resuming hugging his legs. Peaking out from behind them, her eyes widened as the blue pigment, now shaken up, escaped from a small crack in the seams, "I use these," You caught her attention again, producing a myriad of glass measuring spoons, "They tell you the measurements here on the side. I can make you a chart that says how much of each chemical you need and the reactions they'll cause," You offered. Interested by the glass, she took it from your hands, curiously examining the varying shapes and sizes,

"Why are they like this?" She asked, moving one of the scoops to her eye to look through, no doubt interested by the distortion caused by the material,

"They're made from glass,"

"Like a window?" She asked; you nodded, "Why?"

"Glass doesn't react with any of the chemicals. Sometimes, metals react with the different powders and acids, so I-"

"So you use glass so they don't mix," She chirped in, and you nodded. She smiled to herself,

"Yeah. Here, I can teach you how to make an actual bomb with these chemicals," You said, turning to the workbench again. Eagerly, she joined you, sitting back on the stool. She followed your movements and instructions closely, asking questions wherever she could. As you worked, you noticed her grabbing the black marker you had and beginning to doodle on a scrap piece of paper she found. She was still listening- multitasking seemed to come easy for her. Once you finished with the bomb, you let her examine it. Picking up her defect-bomb you placed it next to her, "See the differences?" You asked, to which she nodded, "What are they?" You asked- of course, she did, naming all of them. She was a very smart kid. With a smile, you looked through some of the drawers and produced a set of neon markers that made her eyes light up, "I asked for these so I could see them better in low and black light. But if you want to decorate, I think these'll do you more favour than that marker," She took them and opened them, testing them over her previously drawn lines and eagerly filled them out, marvelling at the brightness. Turning your gaze to Silco, he motioned for you to follow him towards the still-open door of the workshop. You noticed the prideful smile he had before he turned his head,

"Good work," He said, leaning against the door, "You'll teach her what she needs to know," His gaze drifted back to the girl, transfixed and drawing away on the two bombs,

"It's strange..." You pointed out, "It's amazing she knows so much already... Her skills are impressive. But it hits me at times that I'm teaching a child how to craft weapons," You frowned, looking to him. He gazed at you for a moment, a look of understanding on his face. He let out a long sigh, rubbing his jaw,

"You are teaching her safety and technique," He stated, straightening from where he leaned on the wall, "So she doesn't get hurt. She has a talent for this," He looked to Jinx again, who slid off the stool and walked to you two, showing Silco one of the bombs, now covered in bright, neon marker doodles. He took it from her, examining the crosses, sharp zig-zags and an angry-looking monkey that jogged your memory. Moving away from the two, you moved to a desk and dug around the items on it, soon finding the cool metal of the monkey-head. Turning back, you saw Silco patting Jinx's hair and muttering praise for her art and craftwork. It was so beautiful and sweet and seeing the bright smile on the child's face made your chest flood with that same fuzzy warmth again. Stopping next to them, Jinx's happy face turned to you. Opening your palm for her, you showed her the metal. Her eyes grew wide. You hadn't expected her to freeze like this, her eyes turning glassy, the smile vanishing,

"I uh... Silco found this and gave it to me. I thought I should return it to the rightful owner," You said with a smile, but the girl only moved away, fearful again. When she finally stopped looking a the object she put her hands to her eyes, covering them. It confused you, and you looked to see Silco's equally puzzled expression, "Perhaps today has exhausted her..." You spoke, straightening and looking at Silco, who only nodded. Before they could leave, you moved quickly to grab the markers, sighing softly and handing them to him, "Here. She likes them. She can have them," You said, feeling guilty. He still hadn't explained the circumstances under which he found the girl, and you felt rude to pry into him. There was also no telling if he would tell you directly. Perhaps he had given you the metal object for a reason- to keep it away from her. It clearly had something to do with Jinx but you didn't yet know what. Something negative of course- you could tell from the way her shoulders shook and her small breaths, muffled by her hands, trembled. He simply nodded,

"Stop by the bar tonight. I'd like to discuss some things with you," He said, placing a hand on Jinx's shoulders and leading her from the workshop to your front door.  Guilt made your heart thump loudly as you slowly shadowed them. She put her shoes on almost robotically, mind clearly elsewhere, while Silco looked back to you,

"What time?" You asked him to clarify the vague answer. His eye slowly blinked,

"Once everyone is gone," Is all he cryptically said, before he opened the door and exited, offering a hand to Jinx who took it. You watched him present the markers to her as their shapes grew smaller, and a small sigh escaped you seeing her light up again, and grab them eagerly.

This was clearly a mystery, you thought, as you shut the door, moving back into your spacious home and leaning against your couch, allowing your body to fall back onto it and pressing a hand to your head. Stars.

Silco was an enigma but Jinx- she was an oxymoron. On one hand, she was a young naive child, easily distracted by bright colours, and on the other, she was a fairly experienced bomb-maker who needed a bit of practice. And under Silco's care, she would no doubt be used to fill out a role in his inevitable grand plans at some point. Perhaps this is what he was preparing her for. Or perhaps he was simply a man who cared for this child and wanted what was best for her- capitalising on her strengths to get her prepared for an uncertain, yet violent future... You'd need to get some more markers.

You recognised one of the bouncers outside the bar to be the same large man who helped move your two small bags into your new apartment. You'd been through this street before a few hours ago and realised why Silco gave you a home so far away from 'The Last Drop'. The music alone could be heard from a few streets down; you were placed strategically, in a spot the music didn't touch. Perhaps he still cared enough about you to remember your issues with sleeping from when you were younger, easily disturbed by unfamiliar noise. Your hands were stuffed into your pockets and your pockets as you approached the now quiet bar, eyeing the guards. They simply gave you glances, and one motioned his head towards the door, indicating you should enter. Slowly pushing the door and walking in, you glanced at the aftermath of the evening. It was empty, except for the few punks who had to clean the mess. You made your way to the bar, still lit brightly, a lantern in the sea of darkness. A familiar, thin shape stood behind it, his elegant waistcoat illuminated by the hued toxic green lights around him. Silco stood drying two glasses, one of which he set in front of you as you approached. He reached down as you sat up on one of the stools and watched as he poured you both a drink of amber liquid, then set the bottle on the bar next to you,

"Is she alright?" You broke the silence between you two, only interrupted by the scrapes of brooms and quiet footsteps of the few workers. Looks like he still cared for this place since Vander's death. His eyes snapped to look at your face, twisted in discomfort, still affected by the guilt of upsetting her. He set the bottle down with a sigh,

"She'll be okay," The softness in his tone surprised you once more. Stars, he really fucking cared for her. His own gaze filled with sadness at the mention of her, and you watched him lean his pointy elbows on the bar as he took a drink of the liquid, two ice cubes clattering against the glass encasing them, "She's still a little shaken up by what happened," He clarified, setting down the ice-filled glass and reaching the same hand up to rub his wrinkled forehead, a strand of greying black hair falling from where it was usually slicked up, "But she'll be okay," His gaze fixed itself on you, watching as you looked away and nodded slowly, not convinced, "She needs to let go of what happened in the past. Unfortunately, it's still fresh in her mind," He spoke softly and slowly, in a code you didn't yet understand but didn't pry, once again. It was rare for Silco to say exactly what he was thinking,

"I'm sorry I upset her, I had no idea," You said to him. He let out a long sigh, straightening to grab the bottle and pour himself another drink, taking the glass from the top and swirling the brown liquid with the clear melted water from the ice,

"She will be okay," He repeated, forcefully, looking up at you with a stern expression. You held his gaze, "She appreciated your lesson today," He changed the topic, "She's eager to continue learning,"

"That's a relief," You sighed, picking up your drink and taking a sip, savouring the burning alcoholic taste. Silco let out a gentle hum,

"She likes the markers," He added, making you smile softly,

"I'm glad that made her happy at least," You said with a sigh. Drinking the rest of the contents in the glass, you set it down, looking over the clean bar, "Why did you want me here again?" You asked,

"I wanted to ask you what you think of her," He said, "Honestly," He added, raising a brow. You eyed his scar, noticing the usually paler skin matched the side that hadn't been corrupted by the waters of Zaun, "(Y/N)," He caught your attention again, silently watching,

"Jinx is... Well..." You sighed, trying to find the right words and watching as he poured you another drink, "It's strange. I don't know how okay I am teaching-"

"You are teaching her the safety and technique she lacks," He repeated, spreading his arms and leaning against the bar, peering down at you "(Y/N) you know I wouldn't have asked for your help without good reason, and if I could absolutely do without it," that hurt. He noticed your frown and almost challenged you to go off-topic, "Tell me what you think about her, being an expert in the craft," You sighed loudly, showing signs of your annoyance as you turned your head away,

"She did incredibly well. Considering you didn't tell me what she already knew, and the fact that she's so young, she's very good. You're right- she's passionate. This is why it's easy for her to make mistakes," You picked your glass back up and swirled it, watching the liquid form a whirlpool in your glass, "She needs patience if I'm going to teach her more dangerous things. She also needs to understand the basics- I have a few charts I can make her. She'll also need to know which chemicals can mix and which can't to avoid unexpected reactions," You explained,

"You can teach her all this?" He asked. There was only one answer. You both knew this well. A commanding question. Just as oxymoronic as the child under his care,

"Is she here?" You countered,

"She's safe," That likely meant somewhere away from here,

"It was loud here, before. Is she here?"

"She's somewhere quiet,"

"Is she near me?" He looked at you knowingly. You'd clearly worked out why he moved you so far from 'The Last Drop' to not be plagued by the noise, "How much do you-"

"Will you teach her what she needs to know?" The topic diverted back. He humoured you for a moment but took control again. Same fucking Silco. You smiled at him, but sighed, pushing some hair from your face,

"It'll likely take a few years for her to reach the level of perfection you expect," you finally said, watching him nod knowingly,

"If it means she knows what she's doing and that she's safe, that's all that matters to me," He said softly, drinking the contents of his glass again, setting down an empty one, the ice having melted,

"You really care about her, Silco," You pointed out to him, "I don't think you've ever cared for anyone so much," he wasn't looking at you, casting his gaze down at the ground lost in thought. He lifted his head finally, and it looked like he wanted to say something. Instead, he straightened, rolling his shoulders,

"I do," He said softly, looking at you a little too long, "We'll be there in the morning after breakfast. Prepare what you need tonight. See you..." he trailed off, giving you a nod, before walking to the stairs. You glanced down to the empty glasses and the bottle,

"See you..." You echoed before he could disappear entirely, pushing yourself off the stool and letting your hands stuff themselves back into your pockets. You found your walk home was disturbed with thoughts of your... friend and the girl. They wouldn't leave you alone as you tried to solve the mystery of their connection to each other. None of your leads stuck and no matter what you thought you were likely wrong. Silco would tell you in due time. Given your friendship, and the fact that he still considered you to be a friend gave you some hope. He wanted to see you again. He gave you so many nice things. He cared for you too.

The following morning, you greeted them both with a smile,

"Ready to learn some more Jinx?" She eagerly nodded, moving quickly to the workshop. Silco only gave you a nod, and one of his small smiles, watching the two of you disappear into the room.

#arcane spoilers #arcane silco #arcane league of legends #arcane netflix #arcane #silco x reader #silco #silco my beloved #volatilearcane

[silcoseye]

Volatile P3.5: Do You Remember Seeing The Stars for The First Time (spin off)- where things got pretty steamy in the lab...

info: in a parallel universe, Silco and (Y/N) dance the devils tango down in the lab after their first date in chapter 3 of my fanfic Volatile (this is not canon to my fic, just a simple extra for the horny simps and me) i don't write smut often, but when I do I add too many details so I'm sorry for the length ;-;

here's something extra while I work on part 5 <3 this chapter does not impact the story at all- if you are uncomfortable with smut feel free to skip.

WARNINGS: MINORS DNI, 18+, fluff and smut, female bodily autonomy, rough sex, p in v sex, biting, cigarettes soft ending, possibly ooc but who the fuck cares man, not me.

As he pulled away from the hug, you studied his face with a small smile. Your hand gripped his arm gently, refusing to stop this moment from ending; this rare intimacy you had with him- you wanted to relish in it a moment longer. Evidently, he did too, leaning closer, forehead touching yours. Your heart began to pound in your chest, mouth growing dry at your sudden closeness. You could feel his steady breaths against your warm cheeks, and as you close your mouth, you dry swallowed. Stars, the effect he had on you,

"Is there a reason you're shaking?" He whispered, voice too nice and soft, and making you want to cower away in embarrassment. He opened his blue eye, his head moving back from yours to curiously watch you. For a moment, you were just enamoured by him, unable to speak. Collecting your fleeting bits of courage, you spoke

"You're so close," You breathed out, whispering back. He really did take your breath away. As if inviting him, or clueing him in to do just what you wanted, you wet your lips with your tongue, not missing how his gaze followed it against your soft pink lips,

"Close..." He breathed, taking a step forward to press himself unbelievably closer to you. His hand moved to your chin, directing your face up to get you to look at him, "But not close enough," He muttered before his lips latched themselves to yours. His thin lips pressed against your soft ones with an unexpected gentleness that warmed you up. All too quickly, he pulled away and touched his forehead to yours, taking one of your shaking hands that had clenched into tight fists and carefully prying your fingers apart with his own. He slotted his fingers between yours and lifted them up to press a kiss to your knuckles, "You cannot fathom how much I've longed for you, (Y/N)," His voice was low and barely above a whisper. From your close proximity, you could hear him swallow, and your eyes followed down to his throat in time to see his Adam's apple gently bob. Your intertwined hands pressed gently against your chest, your fingers warming his cold ones. Looking back at his face as he spoke again, he pulled back to be able to see you more clearly, "The years we were apart, I-"

"Me too," You may have interrupted him too fast. You may have been too forward, too confident. But you smiled seeing his eyes widen slightly in shock, and you certainly didn't miss how the pupil in his blue eye dilated, "I never thought you would yearn for me too... You were always so caught up in your own world, driven by power," Your voice held some sadness as your eyes drifted down to the illuminated blue ground. He cupped your cheek with his other hand, gently guiding your gaze back to his,

"(Y/N), would you believe me if I told you I was doing all of this for you?" he spoke softly, "My... Vengeance against Vander. It was part of it of course, but I always viewed him as standing in our way," He said, his voice still holding some malice, but with a sigh and glance back to you it seemed to melt away, "I have you now, do I not?" He asked gently, and you nodded,

"You have me now," You repeated in a whisper only he would hear, causing him to smile. With that, his lips returned to yours.

Quickly, he became rough and controlling, lips crashing against yours possessively. Silco's long, pale fingers reached for the back of your head, entangling in your hair and pulling you closer to him. His other hand let go of yours, landing on your hip, letting a few cold fingers slip under your shirt. A shiver ran down your spine at the contact that made your lips widen, letting his tongue dart in and slide against yours. A gentle moan followed from your throat, making him only shift closer to you.

It was all just him for a moment, your senses claimed entirely by Silco: his intoxicating smell; the way his lips met yours and moved smoothly together; his fingers tracing your skin below your clothes. The low ocean tones drowned beneath the sounds of your short breaths and soft moans. As he moved impossibly closer, lips never leaving yours, you felt his hands begin to gently guide you backwards, until you were moving. Pulling apart as you stumbled backwards, drunk off the kiss, your half-lidded eyes noticing his hair beginning to fall onto his forehead. Then the feeling of his lips ghosting down your cheek and jaw caused you to let out a small gasp. When you felt your ass hit the desk, and you lowered yourself slightly to sit on it, eyes falling shut at the feeling of Silco's lips on your neck.

With a louder moan, you felt his lips smirk against your skin. You let out another, louder moan, calling out to the stars above as he took the skin between his teeth and bit gently, his tongue licking at your supple, sensitive flesh, and mouth sucking gently. The mark you'd have would be obvious unless covered. Fucker was marking you as his own. He moved spots a few times until he found the one that made your back arch and wrap your legs around his hips, pulling him closer. A soft chuckle emitted from him as he pulled away, only for his lips to return to yours. You felt him pressing against your core and involuntarily, you jerked your hips, eliciting matching gasps from the two of you. He pulled back to glance down as your hips began to move against his, and with a small groan, you watched a lock from his hair fall onto his forehead. Gently, you lifted a hand to push it up for him and traced a hand along his scarred face. He met your gaze, his breath heavy and audible. You leaned forward sitting up to kiss the indents in his face. One of your hands touched his neck, caressing gently, while you're other cupped his cheek, thumb rubbing his jagged cheekbone. You heard him gently sigh into your ear,

"I don't think I've told you how handsome you are to me, Silco," Your voice dripped with arousal as you pulled away to look at him. The pupil of his good eye was so dilated, hardly any blue remained. Stars, he wanted you bad. Leaning forward to kiss him again, you trailed your hands from his face down to the expensive jacket, hands fidgeting with the clasps holding him away from you. You shifted your body backwards slightly as he moved closer, hands leaning against the desk and holding himself up above you, effectively caging your body close to his. Finally, you felt the clasps of his jacket loosen, allowing you to slide your hands under to touch his chest through his shirt, quickly working with those buttons too.

Panting as he pulled back from you and straightened, your hands wouldn't leave him as you eagerly undressed him. He gazed down at you lustfully,

"I want to see you out of these clothes," He rasped, making you glance up at him. With a smile, your cheeks reddened,

"The feeling's mutual," You told him, undoing another button. With a slight chuckle, he moved his hands down to the hem of your shirt, smiling as you put your arms over your head, allowing him to easily remove it. Shamelessly, his eyes gazed at your body, focusing on your still covered chest, and he reached out to touch your breasts through the fabric that contained the,. Letting your head fall back as he moved closer once more, you could feel his clothed cock pressing into your open thighs. With a moan, you shivered as his cold fingers brushed against your skin moving against your back until he reached the back of your bra. Unclasping it, he watched you remove it, letting it carelessly drop to the floor beside you. He touched this newly revealed portion of your body, eliciting a gasping moan from you as his icy fingers brushed against your nipples,

"You like this, hmm?" He mused, lowering himself as you let yourself lean back against the desk and whining as he pressed a gentle kiss to your areola, before taking your nipple into his mouth. You felt like you were about to combust as he pulled his mouth back, teeth lingering and eventually letting your breast fall back, with a smirk, "You look beautiful like this," He muttered, bringing your attention back to him and smiling softly. You moved a hand closer to your face to try hide from him, aware of his gaze. He slid one of his hands up your body and into yours, holding it gently and moving it from your face, "Don't hide from me now, (Y/N)," He said lowly, watching you from where he hovered near your breasts, "Don't ever hide," He whispered, giving your intertwined hand a gentle squeeze. Once you reciprocated, you felt his other hand tracing down your body to the waistband of your pants, coaxing a gentle sigh from your mouth. With a gentle shiver and arch of your back, you felt his hand dip inside,

"Silco," You moaned his name, and then again, louder as he brought your other nipple into his mouth, gently sucking. His lips formed a smirk as his hand cupped your heated sex,

"You're already so aroused and I've barely done a thing, darling," He teased, laughing lowly as your body shivered at the feeling of his cold fingers rubbing the slick wetness across your folds, fingers skimming over your clit slowly. Helplessly, you moaned, clenching and unclenching your fingers around his hand. This clearly amused him, seeing you so powerless beneath him,

"P-Please touch me," You moaned out, and as he leaned forward to capture your lips, you let out a sharp moan into his mouth as a long finger dipped inside your pussy, "Fuck!" you gasped, tilting your head to the side, allowing him to kiss your cheek, then neck. All the while he smiled, relishing in your gasps and moans as his finger slowly moved in and out of you,

"You like this, (Y/N)," He breathed, and you could only nod as you felt a second finger slowly entering you, stretching you, "I can feel it," He commented, teeth nipping at your skin and ear lobe, "And hear it," He smiled against your face, curling his fingers to brush against your g-spot. your moans growing in volume, "You remember to tell me if you don't like anything, alright?" He asked softly. Dissatisfied with your simple, distracted nod, he stopped all movement and looked down at you with serious, heterochromatic eyes, "(Y/N)," he smiled slightly at the frustrated wine you let out. Nevertheless, you opened your eyes and looked at him,

"I will, Silco," You said, sighing in relief as he began to finger you again, "Y-You don't have to be so slow," You said, eyes shut as you relished in the feeling, "You can be rough, I can take it," You told him, and opened your eyes to see him gazing at you with desire blazing in his eyes,

"Is that so?" He asked, teasingly pulling his fingers out and pressing them against your lips. Eagerly, you opened your mouth and sucked your own juices from him. Swallowing his own moan, he quickly pulled his fingers from your mouth and quickly unbuttoned his pants. With a similar eagerness, you sat up, pulling your pants and underwear off and letting them fall from your legs, his own following right after.

You gazed at his now free cock, hard and standing proud in front of you. You reached a hand out to curl your fist around him, causing him to let out a shuddering breath as you let your thumb graze the head, coating the red tip in his precum. You stuck your tongue out to try to taste him, but were abruptly stopped as he reached out a hand and roughly grabbed your chin,

"Not now," He rasped, moving to grip your arm, causing you to let go of him as he guided you to lean back on the desk, "Another time, darling," He assured you in a whisper. Taking his cock into his own hand, he gave himself a few strokes and lined the head up to your pussy. Letting it slide along the accumulated wetness, "I've waited too long for this- my patience has worn thin," he smirked as your breaths grew heavier and shakier, eventually gasping out a long, drawn-out moan as he slowly pushed his cock inside your pussy.

The pain was instant, his large cock stretching out your tight folds and causing you both to let out a cacophony of moans. You gripped his bare arm tightly, fingernails littering it with small crescent indents. He let you adjust for a few moments until you were no longer squeezing his arm quite so tightly. You let your hand slide down to his hold his hand, relishing in the feeling of his veins prominently sticking out,

"Good?" He made sure, and you breathed out a gentle 'yes', "Rough?" He asked again, and your next 'yes' held more desperation, causing him to chuckle softly.

He pulled out almost entirely, and for a split second, you missed this new, full feeling. Before you had any time to beg him to get back in you, he thrust in once again, causing you to yelp in surprise. He was slow for a few moments, then stopped, adjusting himself and leaning down to kiss you, drowning out your moans before his pace increased rapidly. He pulled away to hear your aroused moans echo through the destroyed laboratory, lips instead latching back to your neck, taking your skin between his teeth and biting down near the red marks he had already proudly left behind,

"Fuck- Silco," You gasped out as he rhythmically snapped his hips against yours,

"You have a filthy mouth, you know that?" He managed to rasp out, breaths coming out in short ragged puffs as more of his hair fell against his face.

Silco pounded into you with unrelenting force, the desk creaking in time with his movements as your moans mixed together, bodies moving in blue light as mutated fish slowly filtered by the huge window, overlooking your late-night activities.

He could feel your orgasm quickly approaching; the way your moans grew in volume; the way your walls began to flutter and tighten against his cock almost made him lose his mind. One of his hands gripped yours tightly, while the other gripped your hip roughly, enough to leave bruises there, effectively pulling you into him more.

"I'm close," You managed to moan out before your eyes closed and your mouth fell open, feeling as the hand on your hip shifted and begin to rub quick circles against your clit. Instinctively, your legs began to shake and moved around Silco's waist, heels digging into his skin to urge him on, "Fuck!" You yelled out, loud gasps and moans leaving you as you came around his dick, followed shortly by his grunts and desperate groans.

Silco's own release soon followed, and he somehow managed to pull out, his cum landing across your stomach as your body spasmed from the orgasm, chest heaving with deep breaths. He leaned over you, forehead touching yours for a moment as you reached a hand up to touch his cheek affectionately, letting the two of your catch your breaths. You took the opportunity to gently kiss his face, making him smile gently,

"Are you okay?" He asked tiredly, and you smiled, nodding,

"With your here, I'll always be okay," You told him, and sighed as he pressed a kiss to your forehead, lips lingering against your skin. He left you on the desk for a moment, and you watched him pick his coat back up, slightly brushing the dust off it before he retrieved a handkerchief from one of the pockets. He walked back to you, helping your clean yourself from the mess he'd made.

Once you were both dressed- Silco having delicately draped his long coat over your shoulders- he sat next to you on the squeaky desk. You watched the fish calmly, passing a lit cigarette between the two of you. At some point, you let your head drop against his shoulder, and your eyes closed as he leaned his head against yours,

"Silco?" You broke the silence, earning a hum from him, "Did you bring me down here to show me the fish and have sex with me?" You asked playfully. You felt the gentle pressure of his head against yours lift, and your eyes opened, looking at him. He was frowning at you,

"I brought you down here because I wanted to see you again," He said softly, "I liked being down here, until it became a hazard... And until I didn't have to hide anymore," He explained, gaze following a large fish that swam across the window. His blue eye focused on you again, "I brought you here because I trust you. Confessing and having sex with you was a bonus," he said, and you smiled, leaning up to kiss his cheek and make him smile again as he pressed the cigarette to your lips,

"Well, thank you," You said after you inhaled the smoke, "Next time, take me somewhere that isn't falling apart, please," He laughed softly, as did you.

The fish calmly swam before you, lulling you to sleep along with Silco's gentle voice mumbling about something.

#arcane silco #silco my beloved #silco x reader #silco #silco x y/n #silco x you #silco smut #silco simp #arcane league of legends #arcane netflix #arcane #volatilearcane

[silcoseye]

Volatile: P5: Vaulting Ambition

info: "It's been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8

thanks for continuing to read this fic even if I make huge breaks between chapters ;-; it's a lot of work heheh. One of my close friends did offer to edit for me but I'm too much of a perfectionist and would still want to go through it in case i wanted to add anything else. i have 3 more chapters planned and perhaps some inbetweens if i feel like it/am given suggestions. all i can say is I'm hoping you enjoy this one and I'm so excited to start work on ch 6!! enjoy simps <3

warnings: gender-neutral reader, starts soft, turns to angst, negative self image/self doubt and self depreciation- reader having a negative mindset, mentions of death, mentions of police brutality, violence, knives, cliffhanger ending hahaha.... plz forgive me

5792 words

When you arrived home from 'The Last Drop' you blinked in confusion as a courier set a parcel down in front of your door and rang the bell. Quickly moving to them, your keys jingling in hand, you let them know you lived there and took the box from them, bringing it into your home and locking your door behind you. Curiously, you set your bag down, hand skimming over your neatly written name and address on the brown paper wrapping it- in Silco's writing. You kneeled on the floor in front of your coffee table, tearing the paper apart and finding a smooth box inside, as well as your letter in neat handwriting. Silco's again.

I'll see you later today. Enjoy the gift. That's is all it said, and your eyes widened as you lifted the lid off the box, eyes scanning over the very fancy clothing inside. You pulled it out delicately, eyes darting over the article. It wasn't something that reminded you of Piltover's fashion; the patterns were neatly stitched together yet mismatched, but the red and black colour scheme with hints of gold along the seems and details stuck out to you. Silco's colours. You recoiled slightly, dropping it self-consciously back in the box and sitting back on your haunches.

What was this? Why was he giving you gifts, being so nice to you? It was very unlike him. He had told you he would get you anything you wanted and required- all you had asked him for so far was to help you with your job of educating Jinx: equipment once it got damaged from frequent use; chemical refills and top-ups; notebooks; metal and metal parts. Nothing personal.  Maybe this was his way of saying he was impatient in waiting for your request? Maybe he was subtly claiming you as his own...

What was this all for? Having your own feelings for him reciprocated this much was alien. And his dubious intentions muddled your mind even more.  It almost pushed you over the edge, made you want to cower away and hide from him. Millions of questions flooded your brain at once, but the main one that struck out was: Where in the stars was he going to take you?

You looked back at the clothing in the box that had been recklessly placed back. Gingerly, you reached a hand to stroke the material as if it were a skittish cat. Smooth, expensive, strange- unfamiliar. Should you just tell him you can't go tonight? Something else came up? You realised you had a project left unfinished that couldn't wait? You got distracted? The latter seemed more plausible but he'd likely just find you in your home and persuade you to follow him anyway. There really was no use in hiding.

To be true, you did want to see him today, but this outfit... He must have spent good money on it. It would be a shame if you never wore it... Would it even fit? How did he even know your measurements?  You should likely just give it back to him, if you end up going later today. Or at another time? Or not at all? Should you eat before you go- if you go? Oh stars, was it another restaurant? Would this one be full of people? Would they all stare at the two of you?  You didn't even know what you'd order. What if you picked something so foreign and disgusting you couldn't eat it and embarrass yourself? What if your nerves made you too anxious and nauseous to eat? Would he be concerned?

You felt the urge to just crumple to the floor and weep until you noticed another note that you missed. Perhaps it was hidden in the clothing and had fallen out as you picked it up. This was also written in Silco's handwriting. You read:

Stop stressing and wear it. Don't even think about returning it. I'm really looking forward to seeing you.

You felt your face flush with warmth, your cheeks filling with crimson and a small squeak slipping out of your lips- you quickly pressed your hands to your face to hide. You lay back on the floor, clutching the note against your chest. Stars Silco was...

"Mindreader," You muttered to yourself, feeling the edges of your lips turning up in a smile.

Fine.

If he wanted to see you so badly, you just had to put on your bravest face and ignore your rapid heartbeat. Slowly raising yourself from the floor, you picked up the box. Making a quick detour to the kitchen, you ate a snack and went to get ready, doing your usual skincare routine and brushing your teeth. You laid out the outfit on your bed and smoothed it down, inspecting it once again. With a nervous sigh, you picked it up, holding it against your body and glancing in the mirror. The measurements appeared correct. Perhaps this outfit would fit... And not look too bad.

In fact, it was possible you looked amazing. You shamelessly raked your eyes over your body and smiled in satisfaction. Silco did always have good taste and was well dressed, you shouldn't expect anything less really. You sat down to finish getting ready- styling your hair, putting on makeup that you deemed necessary. Soon, it was time for you to leave.

You had your reservations about walking through the streets of Zaun in such expensive clothing- without the terrifying reputation Silco built for himself over the years, you were just a person in a fancy outfit. You prayed to the stars above no one would stop you or rob you of the keys and the pouch of coins you carried in the fairly deep pockets.

The doors of the empty 'Last Drop' swung shut behind you as you looked around the almost empty establishment. The bartender was the only one there, meticulously cleaning glasses. He was unfamiliar to you- a replacement you guessed. You wondered what had happened to the previous bartender- had they done something wrong?

"Hey," You called his attention, startling the boy so much he almost clumsily dropped the glass. You winced as you stopped infront of the bar, hands finding your pockets and fingers grazing over the cool metal and soft pouch, "You're new here, aren't you?" You asked, and he nodded,

"J-Just training," He said, "Did you want something uhm- I can get you ah..." he didn't finish the sentence, words dying on his tongue as he just stared at you. Tilting your head to the side you waited a moment for him to finish, collect himself, but the boy just stared. Realising the silence was now certainly uncomfortable, you spoke up,

"Where's Silco?" you bluntly asked the shocked boy. He shakily pointed to the stairs, and you nodded easily stepping over the staff blockade,

"Y-You look great!" Your head spun to look at the boy, who seemed to cower slightly away from your curious gaze. With a small smile, you nodded, thanked him, and resumed your journey upstairs, hands smoothing over the outfit in a small proud smile.

You tapped your knuckles to the door gently and pushed it open at the tired 'come in' you heard from within. The smell of smoke hit you first; the room was cloudy, full of it. A lit cigar, perched between Silco's thin lips, was the source, the end burning bright orange as he inhaled, his form partially obscured. More smoke emanated from his mouth, and as you focused on his eyes, you watched his posture straighten, leaning against the back of the chair. His lips tugged themselves into a small satisfied smile behind the curtain of smoke as you shut the door behind yourself and put your arms out, turning from side to side as you crossed the room in a strange but playful dance, showing off the outfit. You came to a halt a few feet before his desk, arms falling to your sides and sliding up to find the pockets,

"Well well... I won't lie, I am surprised you put it on," his smile widened ever so slightly at your mock glare, "Don't blame me," He said, taking a final inhale of the cigar and dropping it into his ashtray, decorated by Jinx, "I know your nature is to reject any nice gift given to you. I'm glad you are wearing it though. You look good," Your own smile widened at the compliment, and you hoped he thought the blush dusting your cheeks was from the makeup and not your foolish happiness,

"Thanks for adding the pockets," You responded, trying to be smooth and confident, moving your exposed thumbs slightly and glancing down at them, "They were the main selling point to this whole outfit," You told him, eliciting a hum and gentle chuckle. He ran a hand over his hair, a few strands falling onto his forehead from where they were originally styled,

"Have you seen the inside ones?" you looked at him confused, "The pockets on the inside," He restated,

"There are pockets inside?" you gaped, making him shake his head slightly with an amused chuckle,

"My dear, you'd think I'd outfit you in a custom piece with no place for you to conceal a weapon?" He raised a brow, and you blinked, taken aback by his use of the term of endearment, "I may have this small luxury now, but I'm very aware the streets of Zaun are still violent," He chastised, standing and rounding the desk. He stopped in front of you, holding your gaze for a moment.

Suddenly, you became very distracted by the feeling of his hands against your front, undoing the buttons and holding one side of the outfit, showing you the empty pockets. You blinked, admiring his long fingers and relishing in the feeling of them pressing against you. Your heartbeat pounded loudly in your chest and quickly filled your ears almost in anticipation. With a dry swallow, you nodded in recognition and turned to meet his gaze. Searching his bi-coloured eyes for a moment, you found them unreadable- even his human one. If there was an emotion in them, it was one so foreign to you, you couldn't interpret it. With a nervous laugh, you tilted your head and broke the intense eye contact, before giving him a pleasant smile,

"Thanks for showing me. Without you, I wouldn't know they were... there" You said, still cheerful, even in your low tone, "Thank you again- it's a beautiful outfit and I don't know why you'd even get it for me ah-" You couldn't stop rambling suddenly, "How did you know my measurements?" You asked curiously, "It fits perfectly which-"

"Are they here, are they here!?" Jinx's excited voice cut you off as she practically bounced into the room, grinning eagerly, "They are!! We can go now, Dad!" She ran to Silco and grabbed his hand, tugging him towards the door, innocently ignorant of your close proximity together. You beamed at her excitement; clearly, she had also been invited along, and you really didn't mind. Silco's form barely moved as she stopped trying to drag him after her, and instead, she turned to look between the two of you curiously, "Silco, you said we could go once they got here. They are here. Can we go?" She whined impatiently, and you noticed she was clutching a small bag that rattled with marker noises, and that she was hugging the notebook you had gifted her close to her chest with one hand. You glanced to the man next to you with a smile, meeting his pained and apologetic look,

"(Y/N)," He began, but you shook your head, taking a step towards the door of the office,

"I have no issues with her coming along," You said calmly, "Wherever we're going sounds exciting, Jinx," You said, and her wide grin returned as she eagerly grabbed your hand, pulling you along. Willingly you followed her, Silco trailing after you and pausing to lock the door.

Once you were outside in the streets, you quickly recognised he was taking you through the back lanes. Even in daylight, you wouldn't dare go through these areas of the undercity. The one time you had tried to take a shortcut on a day Silco had asked you to come in, you lost count of how many times you had almost been pickpocketed and counted your blessings when you saw a quick flash of a knife almost cut you. You darted into the bar, breathing heavily and only slightly late, but knew enough to not go this way.

Clearly, Silco didn't share the same fears as you. He didn't need to. You watched at how calmly he walked, taking measured, confident strides, shoulders proudly raised as he eyed his daughter eagerly running ahead of him, The lanes were almost empty, and those who were there kept to themselves and didn't dare bother the three of you,

"Marcus got to me eventually," He sighed deeply, breaking the silence between you. He cast a sidelong glance your way, and perhaps he admired you, his gaze lingering slightly on your body in this outfit, "It was like you said, (Y/N). A random accident before the perpetrators got away," He let out a deep sigh, "No witnesses," he said, pausing in his short speech,

"At least you're here now," You said, trying to pull him back to you as you saw him rapidly sinking in to his thoughts. His head lifted, red and black eye glancing at you quickly,

"Right... Yes," He said, "Here now," He muttered, and you let yourself walk closer to him, shoulder brushing against his,

"Did he say anything else worth mentioning?" You asked, trying to change the topic,

"They'll lead an investigation but it won't be successful. I had any obvious evidence removed or fabricated to lead them away," You nodded your head slightly, "He informed me my bartender had been helping himself to the product when he thought no one was around," He sighed deeply,

"So you hired a scrawny kid to poor drinks?" You asked, and he sighed,

"He was the only one available and qualified... Surprisingly," He said, "He got some extra training under the impression he would be helping. He is. But this job won't allow him to slack off," He spoke,

"You're teaching him a lesson?" You asked amused, and he glanced at you,

"If that's how you want to think of it, then yes," He said, and you hummed, nodding,

"Teacher Silco," You mused, glancing at him with a small smile,

"My dear, I believe you are the better teacher between the two of us," He said, and his gaze once again drifted to Jinx, giving you a moment to yourself, heartbeat racing at the intimate moment.

"So why are we here?" You asked after a while of just walking. You were now in another abandoned building, not the same one that led down to the aquarium lab, but a different one, that felt familiar to you. Now, you were gently holding on to Jinx's hand as the girl stood between you and her father, regarding him with her own curious confusion. He had been quiet for the most part- mostly talking and humouring Jinx with whatever she wanted to hear, Silco occasionally responding with his usual short answers to any questions you asked him,

"I wanted to show you something... Do you remember this place?" He asked. At your shake of the head, you observed as he approached a door, "I thought maybe there was a chance you would remember this place," he spoke to you. He didn't sound disappointed. Glancing over his shoulder and meeting your gaze for a short moment, he spoke again, elaborating "It was dark when we came here first... Years ago now" He mumbled, the door opening.

For a moment you were blinded, moving a hand to shield your eyes from the bright white light that flooded your vision, and illuminated the dilapidated building you were standing in. Slowly blinking, you let yourself adjust to the light and then moved your hand out of the way.

The sky before you was a pale blue, and large white clouds lazily danced along its surface in a circular fashion. The air was addictively clean, rushing in and replacing all the toxic chemicals that your lungs had grown used to, lapping it up like a starved creature, causing you to almost gasp, trying to get enough of this pure oxygen. Your eyes prickled with tears of joy, a smile gracing your lips. Feeling so elated, you hardly recognised Jinx's hand slipping from yours, or her eager footsteps as she ran outside towards the brightness.

Who knew the sky was just as beautiful in the day as she was at night?

"Would you care to join us, (Y/N)?" His smooth voice coaxed you to break your gaze away from the outside world and step into it. He was standing outside now, pausing halfway in, halfway out and outstretching a hand out for you to take. Fearlessly, you let the tear slip down your cheek, meeting him in the doorway as you still marvelled at the real world as your hand slid into his comfortably. The naturally beautiful one. The world you deserved. You barely registered a feather-like touch skimming your cheek, and briefly, you turned your head to catch Silco's eye as he whipped the tear from your cheek, "Don't cry," He said softly, and you felt like melting.

He took a step forward, offering you his arm that you gladly looped your own into, and off you went. The stroll by the river was quiet at first, the sounds of a gentle breeze rustling through the grass, the birds chirping their songs occupying your senses and filling you with joy. Jinx ran a little ahead of you again but kept glancing back and excitedly asking about the different flowers, and bugs she would see in the tall grass nearby,

"Oh, what's this?" she gaped, stopping to point a hand at a peculiar, white plant that resembled a tuft of fur. Unhooking your arm from Silco's you moved to her, crouching next to her,

"Those are called dandelions," you told her, pointing to a bright yellow flower amongst the dark green grass, "That's what they start like,"

"How'd it get so fluffy?" She asked, her eyes widening as you reached for the white puff, breaking the stem, and moving it closer to her,

"If you look closely, this fluff is just super thin fibres that allow it to travel in the wind. And at the bottom- this brown bit- this is a seed," You explained, "So when it flies away, the seed gets planted and there are more dandelions," Her eyes were wide with awe and happiness, "We can blow it out together?" you offered,

"Like the birthday cake?" you nodded,

"Mhm- and you also get to make a wish here," You said, smiling wider at her excitement,

"A special plant candle!?" She asked eagerly, and you nodded at her childish antics, "Ok ok, give me a second I need to think of a good wish," She squeezed her eyes tightly, moving her arms excitedly, unable to keep still. Patiently and expectantly, you watched her, "OK got it," She suddenly said, looking at you excitedly, "Do you have yours (Y/N)?"

"Yeah! Ready?" You counted her down and together blew the puffs away into the grass, both watching in silence as they floated away in small bursts, some landing in the thick grass before you and some disappearing further away,

"What did you wish (Y/N)? Did it come true?" she asked eagerly, grabbing your arm,

"I wished for Sevika to be nicer," you smiled playfully, to which Jinx squeaked,

"But now it won't come true... Oh," She giggled, glancing around, "I wanna find more," She said, "I wanna know the limit to these wishes," she said, determined,

"There's a few just over here," Silco's voice interrupted your wholesome exchange, and you were thankful you could hear the smile in his voice as he spoke, unbothered by this distraction "Just a little further this way," he urged, and you returned to your spot next to him, arm going back to his. You thought of anything to talk to him, but for the first time in a while, you drew a blank. There was something so beautiful about the world surrounding you, it took your breath straight from your lungs and wouldn't let you speak. Desperately, you racked your brain for anything to say, "Go on, (Y/N)," He said with an amused smile, making you look at him confusedly, "Clearly you're curious about something," He elaborated, "What are you thinking?" He asked,

"What's going on? Why are we here?" You asked after another moment,

"I told you already it was a surprise," he reminded,

"This isn't the surprise yet?" You gestured with your free hand to the world around you, eyes wide,

"It's part of it. Stay patient, dear," You blushed again, but nodded, glancing at Jinx and telling her not to pick up the yellow dandelions as they were poisonous. After a few moments of walking, you turned up at an old building,

"Is..." your eyes scanned the building, "It's not," Your smile grew as he nodded, "It is?" You asked for confirmation, happily grinning, "Oh my stars- I thought surely it'd be broken down by now," You said, moving  eagerly towards the building,

"What is it?" Jinx asked, following after you,

"When I was a little older than you are now, Silco brought me here... It's where I saw the stars for the first time... The opening closer to here must have flooded by now, considering you didn't take that passageway," Turning to see Silco's small smile and confirming nod, "But I vaguely remember this..." You pushed open the door, letting it creak, and revealing the interior was empty. There was a large hole in the house, crashing through the roof, first and accumulating leftover rubble in the living room area. This strange window let through the last moments of sunlight before dawn, and you were quickly drawn to the reds, oranges and pinks rapidly filling the sky and subsequent room, "Oh wow..." You whispered to yourself and heard Jinx stopping next to you. It was beautiful. You hadn't wanted to cry tears of joy- you were close to. The feeling of your eyes stinging gently forced you to blink quickly as you marvelled at the view,

"Come here," Silco caught your attention, having snuck in behind you and sat on a bench that had roughly been made of a few wooden boards salvaged from the wreck you were standing in front of. Silco was bathed in the bright oranges and reds of a polluted sky, the light making his features appear sharper and more handsome. As you didn't move quick enough, he tilted his head, involuntarily giving you better access to stare at his neck and jawline, "Do you want your surprise?" He asked,

"This still isn't the surprise?" You asked in shock, your tone and wide eyes made him laugh loudly. And when you heard him snort softly between laughs, your heart fluttered warmly, making you giggle softly to yourself. Jinx turned to look at you with a confused expression, probably very confused as to why her nearly emotionless father was suddenly so expressive,

"Course it's not," He said, smiling at you, "You think all I can offer for you is an old building?" He said, shaking his head, and glancing over as Jinx moved out of view to doodle on the walls of the house, already marked by fading spraypaint with the markers she brought,

"You also bought me this?" you said, putting your arms out to gesture to the outfit, "What's all this for?" You asked in confusion, dropping your hands back down. He simply watched you, a small smile set on his lips. This lighting, the bright orange of a setting sky, illuminated him in such a strange yet handsome way. He looked utterly relaxed, leant back against the backboard of the bench and shamelessly looking at the outfit on your body. You felt yourself blushing and

"It's for you," He said, "It's always for you," He said, "I bought you back to the places that I knew made you happiest... You're still clinging to the past somehow, aren't you? You want things to always be this way" he read you like a book, and you felt your lips part slightly in a shock, "I keep telling you I can make you happier now. I'll give you whatever you want,"

"Why..." You breathed "For what?" you asked. He remained quiet for a moment, studying you, waiting for his words to sink in. He sighed then,

"Why can't you accept what's given to you?" he asked with a small sigh, "Must you always ask so many questions?" He asked, eyes flicking to the sky before you,

"Isn't it necessary when you don't give me straightforward answers?" You responded, gazing at him, "Why do you care for me so much, Silco? I thought 'emotions are a distraction.' That's what you always said, isn't it?" His eyes looked back at you, searching your face. His expression was serious but otherwise unreadable as he remained quiet for a moment

"Did you ever see Vander? After what happened?" He asked curiously, the topic of your surprise seemingly forgotten. As you looked off to the side, thinking about your answer, he spoke again, "Did you do anything for him?" He asked softly. Anyone else likely would have missed the hint of sadness that clung to those words,

"He was... different," You started, "The day after, he found me in our home. He was cold. He told me you died and if you'd been here. I lied and told him no. I didn't tell him I helped you. I was scared he'd-" you shook your head, dismissing those thoughts and continuing on, "He just said it didn't matter anymore. You were gone," your voice was low, sadness clear in your tone, "The violence with topsiders would be gone too. He then told me I had two options: I could either let those ideas die with you... Or I could join him,"

"And you didn't?" He finished for you, dual coloured eyes boring into you expectantly. His features flooded with relief as you nodded your head,

"To tell you the truth, I didn't want to live in a world without you, Silco," you said bravely, "I've always hated Piltover and been loyal to Zaun. I honestly didn't know what to do with myself once you were gone," You explained, "Vander directed me to the mines. He said my talents wouldn't be useful anywhere else" You said sadly, "And that's where you found me,"

"He was wrong," Silco remarked next to you. You heard the slight ruffle of clothes and felt his cold hand as it rested against the back of the bench, brushing against the exposed skin of your neck, "Your talents were never useless," He muttered. You bit the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from shivering at his cool touch but refused to look at him,

"Right. They're useful to Jinx now," You sighed, and remained quiet, hoping he would speak. When he didn't, you turned to look at him, regarding him, "May I ask you something?"

"Always," he sighed, watching you with an intense, unreadable gaze,

"Why are you asking me to teach Jinx how to make the bombs?" You noticed the slight roll in his eyes as you bought up the topic yet again. Opening his mouth to answer, revealing jagged, almost fang-like teeth, you quickly interrupted, "Do not give me some bullshit about her safety again," Your answer shocked him enough to widen those bicoloured eyes and shut his mouth, "I need to know the whole truth," You said. Met with his silence, you impatiently brought your hands together, clenching your fingers to stop them from shaking, "You aren't... Using her for any of your plans regarding Piltover, are you?" You didn't meet his gaze. You looked off to the side,

"(Y/N)," He warned, and you swore you could feel his glare burning into your skull, "To even insinuate I would willingly want to put my daughter in the face of danger-"

"Why are you teaching her then?" You asked with a frown,

"Safety-"

"The Silco I knew always had ulterior motives," You accused, "The Silco I knew didn't care for safety, or how many people got hurt as long as he got the results he needed. I doubt you spent time with me solely because you enjoyed my company all those years," You scoffed, true emotions that had been dormant for years finally bubbling up, "Is this it? Did you only want me to teach her what you couldn't? Or did you hope you could make her into a weapon- Silco!" You yelped in surprise as he stood up quickly, raking a hand through his hair. His posture was no longer relaxed but incredibly tensed, angry,

"I don't know who has been filling you with these thoughts or why you're even thinking like this," He said lowly, and you noticed how his hands shook as he clenched and unclenched them, "But these lies and fabrications stop here," He declared, turning to face you and glaring, his lean figure illuminated almost menacingly by the setting red sun,

"I'm simply curious," You said defiantly, standing to meet him, squinting in the light, "Silco, it's been almost a year since you came and reunited with me again. I've been thinking about this for a while now; I'm not influenced by anyone but myself" You said, moving to stand opposite him so you could see his face clearly. The sunlight was rapidly disappearing now, and his stern features were bathed in a fading orange glow, "But- and you call me ungrateful all you want- I realised that you could have come and seen me at any point," You sighed deeply, shoulders slumping in defeat, "At any point, you could have found me in those mines, had you wanted to. You. Yourself. With no other need for it than seeing me, a person who I genuinely thought you cared for. Once you realised I was only something you could use to benefit your 'cause', you found me and gave me no option. And I was so blind because it was you. My... My..." You struggled for words, and let out a frustrated groan, "Stars!! Silco, I thought perhaps you cared for me just a little bit.  I was wrong. It's abundantly clear you only care for Zaun and nothing else, and it has always been this way!" You said coldly, quickly moving for the exit to the house, "This is the last time I let my feelings run so rampant. Don't look for me again. I don't want to see you," Glancing in the direction of where you had last seen the blue-haired girl, you eyed her pink, unfinished drawing, "Jinx knows everything I could ever possibly teach her too... Her lessons are finished. Have a good evening," You muttered as you exited, not daring to look back a final time at his red and blue mismatched eyes.

Swiftly walking down into the streets again, you let your tears slip down your cheeks reluctantly. You'd already cried over Silco enough in your youth. How foolish had you been to think he had changed at all in the near-decade you hadn't seen him. All he ever did was use those around him until they weren't useful to his cause anymore.

And how dare you think so highly of him when you were a mere afterthought for him? It was clear he was just buying into your affections to stay and teach his daughter how to be violent- no doubt for his personal uses later on. Always scheming, always planning. Void of all humanity. That's who Silco was. That's who he was always destined to be.

It was selfish of you to think the years would change him. You grew up with him; you watched his vaulting ambition in hopes of one day ruling Zaun propel him into power alongside Vander, their stubborn and violent natures becoming overbearing and overpowering. Until the betrayal. He slunk down into the sewers, shutting you out, and plotting his revenge. Now he had it all. And he had lost you. How easily would he replace you now that-

"Hey!" You were snapped out of your thoughts, swiftly turning to stare at a group of enforcers you had passed by unknowingly, too occupied by your racing thoughts, trying to quickly hide your tear-stained face as they approached, heavy footsteps menacingly stopped before you, followed by the heavy exhale of air through their masks, "What are you doing here?" One of them asked, voice muffled by the contraption on their mouth. You glanced between the three of them who suddenly crowded around you,

"I'm going home," You said, desperately trying not to let the shakiness in your voice show. You clenched your fists, and glared at them, "So leave me alone,"

"Home, eh?" The amusement in their voice told you clearly they didn't believe you, "Down here? In the slums? Pretty thing like you shouldn't be down here by yourself," They said, and you felt like pray around hungry dogs. You felt a hand brush against the neat outfit's shoulders, touching your hair as one of them circled behind you, blocking you from running from them. Shit,

"I- A friend gave this to me these-" you stuttered nervously,

"So the clothes' are stolen?" You gasped as one grabbed you by the front, pulling you closer to their metal-clad face to inspect your fearful expression,

"No, I promise-" You attempted, but barely got a word in,

"Shut it," Harshly they threw you down to the ground, making you wince as you placed a hand down to try and brace yourself, pain shooting down your arm, "Search them to make sure they don't have anything else that shouldn't belong to them," Feeling their invasive hands on you, you fought back, wishing you had something to protect yourself with. You wished you knew about those concealed pockets sooner. You wished you weren't an idiot who left their knife at home and went on a stroll in the most dangerous areas of Zaun. You wished Silco was with you.

Gasping, you felt them cutting into the expensive material with daggers of their own, roughly searching your pockets. Pulling, ripping and grabbing at you, then barking orders you cowered away from as you moved too much. Somehow, you worried more for what Silco would say about you not taking good care of this outfit more than the cuts rapidly flooding them with red.

Your sharp cries filled the near-empty alley as you were beaten for every wrong movement and violently searched. Anyone who had been lurking in the shadows quickly left, offering you no help. Your attempts at fighting back proved futile, met with kicks, punches and slashes of a sharp knife. You attempted to hold the suggestion of clothing covering your bloody and bruising skin for as long as you could, and you eventually succumbed to their violence, mind floating off into a swarm of blue and red, then black.

#arcane silco #arcane #arcane league of legends #arcane netflix #silco #silco my beloved #silco x reader #volatilearcane

[silcoseye]

MASTERLIST (last updated 9.5.22)

Volatile (Gender Neutral Reader x Silco) COMPLETE

info: "It has been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

Parts:

1: Meeting With An Old Friend

2: Friend to Friend, Of Course

3: Do You Remember Seeing the Stars for the First Time?

3.5: where things got steamy in the lab (18+ SMUT WARNING MINORS DNI this is just an extra, will not effect the story if you skip this)

4: Face to Face, Cheek to Cheek

5: Vaulting Ambition

6: Lighter and A Safety Pin

7: Recovering and Healing Through Time

8: It's Just a Burning Memory

total word count: 52,108

(also available on Wattpad and ao3)

OTHER WORKS

Blood on the Bridge - SFW confession of feelings + angst (short)

#volatilearcane #arcane silco #arcane league of legends #arcane netflix #arcane #silco my beloved #silco x reader #silco

[silcoseye]

P6: Lighter And a Safety Pin

info: "It's been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8

info: oh boy was this fun to write ;P enjoy enjoy enjoy!! I MADE IT TO 10K WORDS ON THIS FIC!!! I'M SO SO PROUD OF MYSELF!! This is my longest fanfic to date aaaaaa!!!  can you tell I'm a basic bitch basing my fanfics off of songs eheheh I worked very hard on this and asked my friend a lot if it made sense/was coherent (i love u nora <3 ) APOLOGISE FOR ANY CONFUSIONS ;-; i sincerely tried my best to be as clear as possible and hope nothing got lost :D thank you all for being so patient with me <3 I love you all, I can't wait for what you guys have to say about this :) Enjoy!!

warning: nightmares, swearing,  needles, yelling, heavy smoking, fire, alcohol consumption, violence, gore/injury detail, blood, flashbacks ;P, burning, marking, yelling, angst!!!!!!, moments of fluff- happy ending because the author doesn't like leaving off on a bad note ;-;

12,337 words

The darkness was overwhelming. Overlapping every sense, enveloping you coldly, blinding you. This lasted for a while until eventually, you saw a glowing light behind your eyelids. Slowly, you begun to make out shapes in the light- minimal and orange, like that of fire- gently flickering. Perhaps a candle. You blinked slowly, eyes heavy at first and unfamiliar with this new setting. The image become clear until you were able to gaze down at the bomb in one hand, and a lit match in the other.

With a yelp, you dropped the burned stick on the ground as the fire burned you, pressing your tongue against the still-warm skin. With a defeated sigh and shake of your head to clear your head, you grabbed another match, confidently striking it against its matchbox.

It flared and burned brightly between your fingers, and you brought it to the ignition string. It quickly blazed, the warm flames licking at the exposed string hungrily, swiftly. You drew your arm back, throwing it into the empty cave, and moving back to where the others were waiting,

"What happened?" You dismissed the nervous question beside you, opting to cover your ears. The explosion that followed was muffled against your hands, but you felt it bellow in your feet, shaking the ground. As you pulled your hands back, you smiled triumphantly, grinning at the praises of the others behind you. Confidently, you strode forward, easily grabbing a nearby pickaxe that had been stuck in some dirt into your sweaty hands and walking into the tunnel you had just created with the explosive. It led to a spacious opening, and from the nearby light, you could see a few twinkles of precious rocks and minerals, along with a cave opening,

"Hey!" You called, voice bouncing off the walls, "This one was great! There's-" A sudden rumbling cut you off, drawing your attention upwards. Your heart sank, rocks rapidly falling towards you. Your feet felt like they had been glued in place, unable to move or react. The weight crashed on top of your body, pinning you to the ground quickly. Before any pain could erupt from your body, you let out a strangled scream-

Your eyes snapped open with a start, pupils wildly darting around the dark wooden ceiling above you. You breathed heavily as you felt your shivering, sweaty body move so it was seated, rustling the thin blanket that lay across you and pulling it closer. Several times, you blinked, steadying your racing heart and shaky breaths, before giving in and letting your head droop, quickly supported by your arms as they came to rest on your bent knees, fingers digging into your hair. Another nightmare,

"Again?" You glanced over to the boy next to you, now also awake, thanks to your incessant dreams.

Silco had always been a light sleeper, and you hated waking him and relaying the same events that had plagued your dreams for weeks now to his tired self. With a weak nod, you leaned back against the wall, feeling him move and sit next to you, legs touching, two bright blue eyes boring into you in the darkness. Silco had a bed- or rather a mattress- right next to yours, but you frequently found yourselves just occupying the same space out of comfort or necessity, especially in the colder months. You pressed the side of your arm against his and threw the blanket over his legs, inviting him closer,

"Is it still about the explosion in the mines?" His hushed tone asked, loud in your ear considering how close he now was and the deepness of his voice. With a small nod, you felt the gentle weight of his head against yours, "You survived," he reminded,

"I almost died," Your hushed whisper countered, clenching your hands together to stop them from shaking, "I keep reliving it. It's like I'm in a loop o-or something. I watch myself walking to the rock and yelling at you and then boom- the rocks crush me," You said, eyeing the bandage covering your arm. His hand reached out, running his fingers over the smooth material,

"Yes, but I grabbed you and you didn't get crushed," He reasoned, "Just cut," You could feel his long hair tickling your cheek as it brushed against your skin, out of its usual bun or ponytail for the night "You're alright," He reminded softly, and with another long sigh, you leaned your head more against his. His hand found your wrist, gently enveloping it and pressing his fingers against your vein, feeling as your rapid pulse slowed as he murmured reassurances, "There. It was only a dream,"

"It's just annoying having to keep reliving it," You felt his shoulders move with a sigh,

"You need to forget about it," He answered,

"That's easier said than done and you know it Silco," You replied, shifting your head to look at him. His expression was calm, his face was smooth, and his hair was unkempt considering how much he moved around, but it hung loosely around his long face. You watched as his eyes flicked away from your face and the slight indentation of his tongue in his cheek, letting you know he was thinking, before he carefully moved out of bed, pulling your wrist along with him. Stepping over the large form of Vander nearby, he motioned for you to follow after him and released you. Mimicking his careful movements, you fell in step with him as you found the rickety stairs of the building you were staying in at the moment, "I thought we weren't allowed up here," You commented, and he only glanced at you with a mysterious twinkle in his eye, silently urging you to follow him.

Emerging into the toxic air, you let it fill your lungs quickly as you glanced around the balcony passage up to another apartment. Curiously, you watched him climb onto the roof of it, jumping onto the railing and stretching his long body to grab onto the ledge of a roof and pull himself up. He turned, glancing down at your expectantly, reaching a hand down,

"No," You said bluntly, quickly turning to go back to your room,

"(Y/N)!" He called, making you huff and turn back to him, "Come on!! Stop being pathetic and come up here," He said, smirking at your glare,

"That's too high! I can't reach, I'll topple over the side and break my neck," You argued, folding your arms and walking closer to him, observing how he crouched above you,

"You've jumped longer distances and climbed higher than this," He said back, hair blowing in the wind. With a resigned sigh, you carefully climbed on the fence as he did, quickly grabbing his hand and jumping up, grabbing the roof and allowing him to pull you up. Slowly standing with him, you took his outstretched hand, "See. I told you you could do it," At his teasing, you scoffed,

"Shut up," You hissed, rolling your eyes and walking with him to wherever he was taking you. You shivered from the cold air surrounding you, "How do you just miraculously know where these places are?" You asked, smiling softly at the boy as he lead you to a ledge. He let go of your hand, sitting down and swinging his legs over the side.

The city before you was large and toxic, stretching out far. Fumes rose into the atmosphere over the buildings, disappearing into the dark sky, the moon hidden beneath thick clouds. Your home. Slowly, you sat next to him, crossing your legs and refusing to dangle them over the side as he did,

"I like to think,” He said simply, “ Unlike my brother, I like to use my brain, and not my fists," You looked back at him as he nudged your shoulder with an already lit cigarette between two fingers; an offering. You took it, furrowing your brows curiously and placing it between your lips, inhaling the smoke and letting it fill your lungs,

"Mhm," You hummed, exhaling the smoke through your nose into the air, "What do you think about up here?" You asked curiously, watching as he lifted his leg up and leaned his elbow on his knee, fingers tracing the sharp angles of his jaw. At your question, he flicked his eyes to you, watching curiously, a small smirk playing on his lips. He exhaled with a hum of his own, looking out over the horizon,

"How one day, I'll change this city," You could hear the determination in his low voice, "The people will respect me... And I'll change their lives,"

"For the better?"

"For the better," He nodded, and you chuckled at that. His gaze went back to you, lifting his brows, curiously, “What’s so funny, (Y/N)?” He asked, amused,

"Do you fancy the title King, Silco?" you asked amused, and smirked as he laughed,

"It has a nice ring to it..." he admitted, tilting his head and taking the cigarette from between your fingers,

“King Silco of Zaun?” You laughed more seeing his chest puff triumphantly, "I can't believe this,” You managed between fits of laughter, “Stars, I knew you were fancy, Silco, but this fancy?" you couldn't help the laughter that escaped you. A plume of smoke rose from his lips as he lifted his brows,

"...Fancy?" he asked amused, and when you looked back at him you could see the curious smile on his face. He looked beautiful; relaxed, joyful, and determined. You rarely saw him like this- usually, he only either snapped at those around him or charmed the space between the ears of rich Piltover scum who frequented your scamming areas. He was rarely so happy- only ever with you,

"Oh forgive me, your Majesty, your drama is enlightening," You grinned, to which he rolled his eyes and shook his head, inhaling more cigarette smoke. Moving your face closer to him you grinned, "Don't get upset, your highness I'm just joking around," You said playfully, and laughed again as he stuck the cigarette between your lips to shut you up, muttering something under his breath. “What was that?” You asked curiously, inhaling the smoke and taking the almost finished cigarette from your lips and stumping it out on the ground. He remained silent for a while, and as you looked up at him, you saw his gaze was downcast, deep in thought. Finally, he spoke slowly, deliberately,

"Someday, (Y/N), we will have it all" He vowed, standing and taking your hands in his, lifting you up to stand with him, "You'll see-" He said, holding one of your hands in his own while the other curled around you and touched your back, your own hands mirroring his placements as you looked up at him, eyes wide and heart racing in your chest. His blue eyes were focused on the city instead of you, and slowly, you took your eyes off of him to look too, "All of Zaun, all of Piltover- they will be bowing to us," He said triumphantly next to you, and you felt the gentle, welcome weight of his chin on your head as you slowly began swaying to the silence surrounding you, the calmness filling you from head to toe and chasing away the darkness, chaos and disorder that roamed in your brain.

"How did this even happen?" Voices surrounded you. Echoing between invisible black walls You could barely make out what they were saying, "How did it get to this?" Angry hisses filled the void around you. The voices collided together in some far off cave. Another planet or another world. Far away from you.

"(Y/N)?" Silco’s voice brought you back to where you lounged on your chair. Rapidly blinking, you shifted to sit up straight in the chair, stubbing the cigarette out on the wooden chair next to you. Silco stood across the room from you, leaning against a wall with brows furrowed as he stared at you, "Did you hear what Vander said?" You glanced to the larger boy next to you, brows furrowed too as he studied you. You opened your mouth, lost for words for a moment, before quickly regaining your train of thought,

"Vander, I told you I finished the bombs already-" You tried to say, but he just stood, shaking his head,

"You haven't tested them," He cut you off, "I told you they had to be done and tested by-"

"So what if they're not tested!?" You protested, "They haven't failed on me once before," You argued, watching as Vander stood, beginning to pace around,

"What if they fail this time, huh?" He argued, “What if somethin’ goes wrong? Then it’s our blood on your hands, (Y/N), just ‘cause you didn’t want to do somethin’,” You glared at his words,

"They won't fail, Vander,” You said coldly, “Stars, it's like you don't fucking trust me anymore," You scoffed, standing so suddenly the chair almost fell backwards behind you, "What? I fuck up once in the mines and I'm- I’m a liability or something?" You said, defiantly matching the older boy's glare as he moved to tower over you, standing only a few inches from your face. You could feel his warm breath against your face, but you wouldn’t relent,

"You’re not leavin’ Benzo's side ‘till you successfully test those bombs- I'm serious, (Y/N)" He said as you opened your mouth and tried to argue back, “When I get back, they better be done and ready, or you’ll have to find somewhere else to stay for the night,” He threatened, leaving with a huff. Once his back was turned, you rolled your eyes, throwing yourself back into the chair and grabbing the pack of cigarettes off a nearby table, sparking up a match and lighting the end of one of them. After taking a sharp inhale it was plucked from your fingers and placed between Silco's lips. He had now walked over to you, and stood by your chair, taking a calm drag and handing it back to you,

“He can’t be threatening me like this,” You muttered bitterly, taking a drag yourself angrily,

"Why haven't you tested them yet?" He asked curiously, leaning against the side of the chair as you rubbed your forehead,

"The accident at the mines..." You said softly, hearing him sigh next to you, "Don't dismiss me. I c-”

"I'm not dismissing anything,” He said quickly,

"Then why did you sigh?”

"I hate seeing you this bothered about something like this. You should tell Vander-”

"You think he cares!?” You scoffed, turning to look up at him with a slight glare, “The only thing he cares about is that I can make explosives, that's it. He doesn't give a shit about the fact that I can't sleep because I keep thinking those stupid rocks are going to crush and kill me” You said, sticking the cigarette back between your teeth,

"He's usually asleep,” He said, taking it from your mouth and placing it into his,

"You're not helping, Silco," You muttered out through gritted teeth, standing sharply, "Anyways- you're wasting my time. Haven't you heard? I'm bound to Benzo until I ‘perfect my craft’ and test those fucking bombs," You rolled your eyes, moving to exit the room. He quickly grabbed your hand, spinning you around to face him. You came to a halt before him, eyes shining and brimming with angry tears. He calmly took the cigarette from between his teeth and placed it back in your mouth with a small smile,

"Good luck. I believe in you, (Y/N)," He said, patting your cheek. His words laced with the putrid smoke of the cigarette fanning across your face. And with that, he let you go and followed out the door after Vander, disappearing.

Blinking rapidly to ignore the warmth that filled your cheeks, your tears gone, leaving you with damp eyes, you returned to Benzo's workshop and distracted yourself with the bombs. For some time now Silco had… a strange and profound effect on you. You'd watched him roll his eyes in annoyance a thousand times over, but recently it had made your heart race in your chest and your palms get sweaty. You had heard him speak so much, but recently, whenever he uttered your name, you felt like collapsing right there and then. You hated to say it but you had... Feelings for him. But, of course, he wouldn't feel the same way.

Silco always wanted more out of life. It's no secret he would likely see you as not good enough for him- you were just a person he lived with, and you saw the people he would flirt with at the numerous parties and raves you would frequent in the Lanes. None of them where ever you. The attraction would only ever be one-sided, and circumstantial. Simply.

Silco was also entirely focused on creating the Nation of Zaun. Tired of Piltover turning their blind eye on the struggling undercity and treating its people like scum, you had no other choice than to rebel. It just so happened Silco and Vander became the leaders. Rousing the crowds against the Topsiders and planning the fight for your independence. A shared, beautiful dream- a dream that he was utterly devoted to.

Before long, your bombs were tested and reported back to Vander upon his arrival back home. He barely thanked you, grunting something under his nose and swiftly leaving again, leaving you sulking, alone in the house.

Fiddling with a few pieces of metal you had around- linking and unlinking them from chains you had picked up, you glanced up as the door opened again. Silco stumbled in. His hair, which was usually gathered in a loose ponytail, was falling out of its place around his face, blue eyes hazy. He swayed gently from side to side as he attempted to stand straight, eventually leaning against the door frame and gazing at you. A light pink dusted his cheeks, and the first few buttons of his collar had been unbuttoned. Silco was certainly the most well dressed in your group, caring far more about his appearance than the others, who simply dressed out of convenience. You tilted your head, eyeing the green bottle in his hands,

"You're back early," You mused, smiling back at him,

"Come with me, (Y/N)," His speech wasn’t entirely clear, a slight slur to his speech. He held a hand out for you to take, “I want to show you something,” He said cryptically. Slowly you stood, approaching him and taking his hand in yours. It was soft, except for the scars and a few fresh cuts on the back of his hand,

"Did you get into another fight?” He nodded, taking a long drink from the bottle and pressing it into your hands. You eyed it, lifting it up to the light as you walked outside with him and swishing around the remnants of the beverage inside. You brought it up to your nose and winced at the strong alcoholic smell emanating from it with a grimace. You looked over to your drunk companion, "Did you win?" you asked curiously,

"I always win," He said, teeth flashing as he sent you a smug grin. You laughed,

"So this is a celebratory drink?" You asked, shaking the bottle making the liquid audibly slosh around in it. He nodded again, this time humming lowly,

"And I'm rescuing you before Vander comes for you again," He huffed, rolling his eyes, "He's being an asshole again,"

"When is he not?" You asked, making him laugh and grip your hand tighter in his, pulling you along through the crowded Lanes, now that the sun was beginning to set, “What set him off this time?” You asked, and watching him shrug and roll his eyes in annoyance, gently squeezing your hand,

“Fuck knows,” He muttered, pulling you along. For a moment, you fell silent, focusing on following him through a particularly thick crowd that appeared,

"Where are you taking me?" You asked when he was finally close by again, "And should I even trust you?" You asked, raising your brows as he stumbled and just barely caught himself from falling over. You laughed slightly at his drunken antics and moved a hand to hold his arm as well, "Stars, how much did you drink, Silco? You're only tiny... Don't tell me Vander let you get this wasted," He scoffed,

"I can easily out-drink Vander," He said with a confident smirk,

"Maybe in your dreams," You said playfully, making him a glare, "Silco, he is twice your size in every way. There's no possible way you would be able to take him on in a drinking competition- you remember last time?" You said, "I don't... Stars, how did we even get home that night..?" You chuckled to yourself, glancing at your companion who had gone quiet and let go of you, "Silco?" You asked as he suddenly stopped walking. Stopping too, you glanced over your surroundings and noticed you were now in an alleyway scarce of people. Those who were there simply watched you but didn’t approach, wary of your companion and his reputation in the Lanes. You turned your gaze and watched him walk down another alley, touching the wall of a building to steady and support himself as he disappeared behind the wall, “Silco?” You repeated, following him and groaning, “Silco, get out of the trash- I’m not going to sleep anywhere near you if you smell like trash again,” You said, folding your arms and watching as he moved to a pile of trash beneath a trash shoot and begun digging through it. You audibly cringed, “You’re sleeping outside again,” You huffed, but nothing seemed to be getting his attention. With an eye roll, you walked over to him, watching as he picked up a shiny object from the trash pile, “What, are you a crow now?” You asked, amused, and gently nudged his crouched form with your foot. He finally looked up at you and you couldn’t help but smile warmly.

He looked like the boy you remembered seeing all those years ago when you were so young. Those same curious, round blue eyes boring into your form curiously as you huddled under whatever scraps you could find shelter from the cold. So young and innocent.

Silco and innocent didn’t belong in the same sentence anymore. As handsome and young as he looked, your eyes grew wide at the sudden appearance of a spark between you two. A real one. He pressed on the contraption again, admiring the sparks it gave off,

“Lighter,” Is all he said, standing and holding it out for you to take into your hands. You hummed, looking it over, and repeating ‘lighter’ to him. Flicking it revealed it was still functional- likely just out of fuel. Your suspicions were confirmed when you managed to open it and noticed the almost empty fuel cartridge. Whoever threw this out was clearly some idiot with a tiny brain who didn’t know how a lighter worked. Waste of money for them, but a gain for you. With a small hum, you grabbed the bottle, and with great care, poured in some of the remaining alcohol, all the while being watched by your drunk friend,

“Try it now,” You handed it back to him after closing the cartridge, and whipping off the remaining alcohol on your clothes. You smiled as the lighter, once he flicked it, gave off a constant flame,

“You fixed it,” He said surprised, following you out of the alleyway,

“It’s easy to fix that which is not broken,” You looked at him, transfixed by his suddenly warm gaze. His eyes were still hazy and glazed over, and clearly, he was still drunk, “Besides, fixing things is easy,” You said, but the rest of what you wanted to say was lost on your tongue as he loomed over you, looking down at you for a long moment. You were stopped, standing outside of the alley and staring at each other for a moment, unspeaking. That was until you felt the cool lighter pressing into your hands. Momentarily breaking your trance, you glanced back up at Silco, watching as he nodded his head to the side, in a silent request for you to follow him.

Now firmly gripping the lighter to stop your hands from shaking, you followed him curiously. Silco’s brain was already a mystery to you sober, but drunk? If you could decode anything, you deserved to be hired as a detective on the spot. But now, you honestly could not say where he was leading you and with what intentions, and that said a lot. You grew up in these lanes. How did he always miraculously just find areas you had no idea existed until right now?

You looked around the open area. It appeared to be a river filled with toxic waste from either of the cities, stretching out far into the horizon, the black water easily reflecting the lights of the city. It looked beautifully dangerous. You blinked quickly,

“How did you-” Turning quickly, your eyes widened as you saw he was already climbing up a nearby rooftop, “Silco get down from there!! Silco! You’re going to hurt yourself, you menace- ugh-” You groaned, quickly following after him and trying to grab his leg. Moving just out of the way, you groaned in frustration, “Silco!!” You yelled. His head poked out from where he was on the roof, and he stuck his tongue out before disappearing, “Silco, you rat, come back!” You yelled, groaning as you shakily got onto the same trash can he had used to get up, stuffing the bottle into a larger pocket on the inside of a jacket you were wearing. You reached up, grabbing the metal ledge and attempting to pull yourself up. Not having the same strength caused you to wince, letting go of the ledge and falling back with a clatter on the bins, “Come back and help me! Don’t leave me here,” You said, biting your cheek as your tone changed to pleading, “Silco?” You asked, worriedly now as he didn’t respond. Your eyes widened with hope as you saw him peeking down at you again,

“You seriously can’t get up here?” He asked, and you glared as he raised his brows,

“I’m not strong and my arms hurt- did you forget my injuries,” You said, and glared as he laughed, “Get down here,” You demanded, glaring more as he moved to reach his arms down to you, “No, no, no, I’m not going up, you come down,”

“Aw, come on (Y/N),” He said with a grin, “The view from here is so much better. You’ll love it,”

“I don’t care about the view, Silco, I care about you s-so that you don’t get hurt,” You finished quickly, blinking rapidly at your words, and folding your arms together. Seeing him begin to move back you called his name desperately, to which he laughed again and reached his hands down once more,

“Come on (Y/N),” He insisted, “Trust me on this,” He added. Slowly, you reached your arms back up, carefully jumping up off the bin and gasping as he grabbed onto your arms, pulling you up like you weighed nothing. For being so thin, you often forgot Silco still had some strength. Certainly, nothing compared to Vander or Sevika, or even Benzo, but he was still strong- stronger than you. Gasping for air, your eyes glanced up to see him smiling at you, crooked teeth on display, “See? You did it!” He said proudly, shaking your shoulder before he turned and walked along the roof, producing a cigarette from one of his pockets,

“Silco, do I need to put a leash on you?” You called, quickly composing yourself and quickly following him so that you didn’t lose him. You sighed as you followed him, catching up to him eventually. “You know where you’re going at least?” You asked and sighed as he didn’t respond again. You quickly realised it was useless to try and communicate anything with him, and gave up, “You’re awfully quiet,” you decided to point out, watching as he slowed to a stop, now on a higher rooftop, and sat down. Joining him, you focused on trying to calm yourself.

Glancing over at him, you noticed he was reaching for the bottle sticking out of your pocket. Quickly snatching it into your hands and moving it out of his reach, you laughed softly at his frown, or rather pout,

“Don’t even try- you’ve had more than enough and I’m not dragging you off of here when you pass out,” You said, and when he leant over you to reach for the bottle again, your eyes widened, pressing a hand to his shoulder and gently pushing to stop him. He easily moved back with an annoyed roll of his eyes, which surprised you. From the numerous arm wrestles you’d entertain yourselves with on slow days, and his previous display of strength, easily pulling you up onto the roof, you knew he was strong. It made you feel warm inside knowing he would so easily just relent to you. You watched him calmly lean his arms back, looking over the waters ahead,

“It’s quiet here,” He said softly, voice quiet and soft. You hoped he was starting to sober up. With a small nod, your own gaze looked to the water. You dared to lean your head out and look down at the pier you had been standing on a moment before, peering at your face reflected in the murky liquid bellow, as well as the muddy soles of Silco’s boots next to you. With a hum of agreement, you lifted your head up to see him, now holding the burning lighter in his hands,

“Be careful with it,” You said, “You did find it in the trash,” You reminded, watching the steady orange flame, then glancing up at his face. In the dimming light, it illuminated his face in a warm glow, the bright flame reflecting in his pupil mysteriously as he stared, transfixed. For a moment, you allowed yourself to watch him, before sticking your hands in your pockets to find something to eat. You usually kept bits in your pockets so you could eat them later-

A sudden prick to your finger caused you to yelp in surprise, and you heard the lighter click off as you drew the finger from your pocket and into your mouth to staunch the drop of blood. With a small frown, you reached into your pocket, pulling out a safety pin that hadn’t been pinned back. Hearing Silco tsk besides you brought your attention to him,

“What?” You mused, taking your finger from your mouth and examining the dot of red liquid on the pad of your finger, “The pin wasn’t in safety mode,” You said playfully. Glancing at the older boy, you saw he was looking down at your finger too, before quickly averting his gaze to the lighter in his hand. You may have been mistaken due to the low light but his pale cheeks flushed for a moment, and his tongue darted out to wet his lips. Your eyes widened and you looked at the pin in embarrassment, trying to ignore the thoughts that had suddenly entered your brain. Licking off the once again pooling blood, you started to clip the pin back into place before stopping, an idea breaking through your embarrassment. You looked back to him, curiously,

“Silco?” You asked, not looking at him, “What if we got marks together?” You asked, looking at him. You smiled, amused as he stared at you with wide eyes, “Just small ones- like tattoos! Like, something that we’ll always remember each other by,” You suggested. You lifted up the safety pin and grabbed the lighter from him, flicking it on and putting the sharp tip into the flames to sterilise it,

“Matching burns, you mean?” He asked uncertainly, though he was clearly intrigued, having shifted his whole body to watch you curiously. You nodded,

“Mhm, like… Maybe on our palms?”

“No, that’ll easily get infected,” He said. At least he wasn’t denying your idea fully. You hummed, thinking,

“Then where?” You pondered, looking up at him. You watched as he looked down at his hand, turning over his palm and examining his already scar littered hand, marks of numerous knife fights- victorious or not; some fresh, some now- covering the surface as he searched for a spot untouched by the violence he experienced daily,

“Here?” He pointed to the side of his hand near his pinky finger, dragging a finger back and forth along his skin. It would cross against the other scars, but it would do. You nodded, glancing at your own hand and humming,

“This will hurt,” You reminded him after a while, watching the needle begin to glow red with heat. You glanced up at him, watching as he took a swig from the bottle you had specifically moved away from him so he couldn’t reach it. The smirk and wink he gave you as he caught your stare before taking another sip made your stomach flip, and you had to look away and pray the lighter wouldn't illuminate your blushing cheeks to him, “Okay, give me your hand,” You said a few moments later, watching as he moved the bottle away and stretched his hand out in front of you.

Clicking the lighter off, you quickly pressed the needle against his skin and listened as he sharply inhaled beside you, hand reaching out to your arm and squeezing tightly. You let him, simply blushing at the sudden closeness, even letting his head drop against your shoulder once you pulled the needle away. Clicking on the lighter again and picking up his hand in yours, you muttered an apology as you examined the mark,

“That’ll look cool when it heals,” You assured, reaching up and gently patting the side of his face, watching as he straightened, looking at the new scar,

“It burns,” He said with a frown,

“We’ll run it under cold water when we get home,” You said, before handing him the safety pin and lighter, watching as he repeated the process you had done just a moment ago,

“It’s gonna be on your skin forever,” He said, watching you,

“I know,” You assured, “It’ll be cool. Besides, I’m not in this alone,” You said, glancing at his hand that bore the mark, “And it’s not the first burn I got, and it won't be the last,” You said, running a hand over your arm. From not being careful, or not paying attention, you accumulated multiple dark burn scars along your arms- always eager to freak out other street kids with them and tell tales of creatures that came for you that you bravely fended off. You always had a natural charm for children that Silco and Sevika both teased you about endlessly, but you personally found it sweet. You were all in this shit together- if you could provide some entertainment for the younger ones, it was a pleasure,

“Hmmph,” He grumbled, unsatisfied by your answer, “Have some of that. It doesn’t hurt as much as it would sober,” He said, eyes darting from the needle to the glass bottle beside you. Rolling your eyes, you picked it up, glancing at the liquid in the green glass and bringing the bottle to your lips. Fighting off the urge to cringe at the heavily alcoholic scent, you took a large mouthful, coughing and cringing once you swallowed,

“Fucking stars above that is rancid,” You choked, and glared as Silco laughed, “No wonder you’re this wasted. Silco- what is this? Pure gasoline?” You asked,

“Hah- wouldn’t you like to know,” He said with a grin, looking back at the needle,

“That’s why I asked, Rat boy,” You sniffled, but bravely took another sip, immediately regretting it. Coughing and spluttering again as you slammed the bottle down you spat harshly at the water bellow, “Fuck- we really don’t have anything to wash that down with?” He shook his head, “How are you alive right now?” You asked as you sat back down, shuddering at the taste that still lingered in your mouth,

“Practice makes perfect,” He said, glancing up at you and grinning at your disgusted expression, “Come here,” He said gently, and you noticed the needle was now glowing brightly once again. Gingerly reaching your hand out, you felt your heart beginning to race in your chest as he clicked the lighter off and submerged you in almost complete darkness again. The realisation of what was about to happen both excited and terrified you, paired with the anticipation of now being in the dark, you exhaled softly,

“Will it- FUCK!” you yelped, unprepared for the sharp sting that hit your skin. Quickly, he reached for you, gripping your wrist to keep your hand from moving. You shut your eyes tightly, tilting your head away and letting out a small wince of pain, but felt pleasantly surprised at the feeling of his hand gently caressing your wrist. Finally, he took the needle off and let you go, allowing you to gently cradle your sore hand, “Fuck that- that was so much more painful than I expected it to be,” You said shakily, and glanced down at the red mark, feeling him remove the needle

“You were the one who suggested this,” Silco reminded, clicking the lighter back on and examining your hand carefully, “No turning back now,” He added, and you glared,

“I know,” You huffed, letting out a small wince as you moved your hand unintentionally, “And you agreed,” You smiled softly,

“How unfortunate for myself,” He hummed, returning your smile, and moving his fingers to gently skim against your hand, “It appears we’re bound together now. Forever,” He added, a playful glint in his eye. Laughing out of happiness, you looked back at your hands, watching as his fingers soothingly dragged across your skin. When they came too close to the scar, you audibly winced,

“Too close,” You hissed in pain. You heard him tsk and let go of you, drawing back,

“Come here,” He muttered, and you glanced at him to see him opening his arms as an invitation to hug him. You shuffled closer to him, allowing him to gently hug you close to him. It was comforting, especially now, and rare. Although you usually slept together and woke embracing, actually hugging Silco like this was uncommon. He hated the closeness. He barely allowed you to do so soberly and consciously. When drunk like this, he was much more lenient, but it still pleasantly surprised you that he initiated this hug. Big words... Your head was spinning, letting you know your own sobriety was rapidly disappearing. You heard him mutter something, but feeling too comfortable and suddenly very sleepy in his arms, you simply hummed and shut your eyes, face pressing into his chest,

“Can I seriously ask what was in that bottle?” You asked after a few moments of silence, smiling at the warmth of his body against your cheek, “I wanna know if I’m gonna be hacking it all up tomorrow or just dying,” He chuckled, and you could feel the vibrations against your face,

“You didn’t answer my question, (Y/N),” He said, and you glanced up at him, “I asked if you were happy,” His soft tone surprised you, and you shifted so you could look up at him, face now touching his shoulder,

“Happy? Course I’m happy,” You said, your voice becoming muffled as you pressed your face into him again. If he was willingly offering to hug you, you weren’t going to waste the opportunity, “I’m always happy whenever I’m with you,” You wouldn’t admit it soberly, but your drunk confidence clearly began shining through,

“Is that so?” He asked, amused at your bold declaration. You nodded your head against him with a satisfied hum and glanced down as he took your injured hand into his own injured one, drawing them close to examine the matching marks,

“I guess we have to stick to each other forever,” You said, “I think these scars are permanent,”

“They certainly are…” Silco said softly, and as you shut your eyes, dozing off, you could swear he pressed a kiss to your fingers. Or just squeezed your hand. How could you tell- you were too sleepy to care.

“(Y/N)?” A voice, breaking through the darkness, “Stars why aren’t you waking up?” A whisper, “(Y/N)!?” A plea. A yell. An incoherent yell, “Get them up- we need to leave now,” Desperation. Your body felt like a feather, or as if it had been plunged into water, gliding off the cold floor and into the vast emptiness.

“I don’t like what Vander’s doing…” Silco muttered, on the floor in front of your bed while you sat on top of it. It had been a few weeks since the two of you had given yourselves the matching marks, which had begun to heal quite well- yours slower due to you constantly fidgeting and picking at the scabs, but with Silco periodically smacking your hand away as a reminder not to, it was looking promising. You cherished the painful mark, a small reminder of him at all times,

“What is he doing now?” You mused, picking at the skin around your fingernails, “And besides, when have you ever liked listening to anyone else but yourself?” You said playfully, shoving his shoulder gently with your foot, “Let alone Vander, of all people,”

“That’s not the point… It’s… He’s changing,” He said, leaning his head back against the bed. His eyes moved from you to the ceiling, lost in thought,

“How?” You asked curiously, dropping your hands to lean on your knees and watching him. He moved back, humming and beginning to tap his fingers against his leg gently,

“Don’t know. Mentally I suppose. The other day, he lost a game of cards to a known cheat. He didn’t beat him, or threaten him- he just walked off. Then when he caught me trying to get the money he lost back from the boy, he just dragged me off and told me to leave him alone,” He shook his head, “Blabbering something about how we’re ‘better than this, Silco’, and ‘not everyone we meet is an enemy, Silco’, and ‘we shouldn’t fight our own, Silco’” He scoffed, baring his teeth, growing in anger with each sentence, “It’s ridiculous,”

“You didn’t bring Sevika along?” You said, raising your brows, “That’s your biggest mistake. She knows her shit with cards, and frankly, she wouldn’t let him cheat her. She’s too good,” You focused on your nails again, picking at some dirt beneath them. Silco huffed from below you, standing sharply,

“It wasn’t about winning a game of cards, it was about taking back what was unfairly stolen from him, (Y/N),” He snapped, beginning to pace slowly around the room in measured steps, “He just let that cheat walk over him and didn’t retaliate… It isn’t fair,” He muttered on. You watched his slender fingers withdraw a knife from where he had it strapped to his hip and flip it through his fingers, careful of the blood-stained blade, “Had it been me he cheated, he wouldn’t have made it out alive…” Silco hissed, “Vander is growing weak,” he settled, watching the blade moving in his hand in expertly practised movements,

“You have been spending too much time with Sevika,” You said, rolling your eyes as you moved to find a cloth to clean his knife with,

“(Y/N) you can’t deny that I’m wrong!” He said, exasperated, “He’s… Changing! You’ve seen it too!” He said, running a hand through his unkempt hair. If only he let you brush it, “He brings you food and asks if you’re okay and talks to you. He never used to do that,” He said,

“You mean to tell me you’re worried that he’s being caring to the people around him?” You asked, raising your brows,

“He’s becoming soft…” He said coldly, eyes narrowing, “And weak,”

“Soft doesn’t mean weak,” You tried to counter, “Maybe he-”

“I’m sorry- whose side are you on?” He outwardly questioned, glaring. The knife stilled in his hand and pointed at you. You flicked your eyes from the blade to your friend, watching as he glared before blinking rapidly, “Are you weak like him?” he said in a low, almost menacing tone. It was the same one he would taunt those unlucky enough to cross him,

“Don’t even try to do that to me, Silco, it won’t work,” You said, your tone cold as you glared back, sharply standing from your bed, “You know full well I could set this place ablaze in minutes, so unless you want to keep a roof over your head, stop trying to warp me against Vander,” You said lowly, clenching your hands tightly,

Silence fell between you as you challenged each other from the sides of the room. You watched Silco place his tongue in his cheek, lost in thought. With a small groan, he dropped the knife from his hand and let it clatter to the floor before he stalked to exit out of the room,

“One day,” He said lowly, gloweirng at you over his shoulder, “You may be given the choice to choose between one of us,” He said threateningly, tilting his head up as he saw your eyes widen in reaction to his words “I hope you do so correctly,” With that, he disappeared through the doorway.

For a moment, you considered his words seriously. Did he just threaten his own brother in front of you? Did he threaten you? Surely he was joking or… Fooling you somehow. He wasn’t serious about picking sides. You looked to the ceiling, trying to focus on your rampant thoughts. A choice between Vander and Silco. They led the rebellion against Piltover together, they were close, like brothers, and you supported them both with your life. You too were dedicated to the cause. To the creation of Zaun. But were you prepared to lay down everything for it? Did you have Silco’s ambition or Vander���s temperament? That’s truly what the choice was, thinking more on it now. That and violence or peace.

In the end, you scoffed at his words, shaking your head to dismiss them. It was too early for this,

“Drama queen,” You muttered to yourself, walking closer to where he had dropped the knife. Picking it up, you looked over the jagged blade, stained with dried blood of whoever had unfortunatly crossed Silco’s path and sighed deeply,

“He’s right, you know,” You nearly jumped out of your skin with a small squeak at the sudden voice that filled the quiet room. Your anxiety was quickly replaced by anger as Sevika’s laughter echoed through the room, “Damn, you’re still such a scaredy-cat,” She grinned, walking further into the room, a lit cigarette hanging from her lips as she sat on one of the beds,

“Why do you think sneaking up on me all the time is funny?” You asked, unamused. She simply grinned, exhaling the smoke she had in her mouth,

“Because you always get scared,” She said, and you rolled your eyes,

“Right- I forgot you’re a bitch in the mornings,” You huffed, “What do you mean he’s right?” You asked, folding your arms. You watched Sevika grimace at your words, glancing out of the small window above your bed. The glass was cracked and dirty, and the fumes outside meant you could barely make out anything. Luckily, a green light still cast its light into the room, splintering and illuminating her features,

“Vander’s weak,” She simply stated, echoing Silco’s earlier words, rolling the cigarette between her fingers and letting the smoke dance circles into the air, before placing it into her lips again, “He is changing,” she confirmed,

“We all changed,” You countered, “We’re growing up. Change is natural and unavoidable,” She shook her head,

“You don’t understand because they don’t tell you,” You straightened at her words, letting your arms drop to your sides as you walked closer to her,

“What don’t they tell me?” You asked suspiciously. Watching her groan and glance away, realising she had slipped up. Your eyes widened, and you quickly pointed the tip of the knife at her you stepped closer, “Sevika, what are they hiding?” You asked,

“Stop pointing that at me if you know what’s good for you,” Not daring to pick a fight you’d definitely lose, you let your hand fall to your side, moving the blade away from her, “Vander needs your bombs for the bridge,” She sighed deeply, “They told you they’re planning on trying to get their message to Piltover but not how,” You gaped at her,

“They’ll use violence?” You asked,

“Silco wants violence,” She explained, “He’s convinced that’s the only way to get any message up to Piltover. Doing something that’ll bring them down here. Vander isn’t… He’s not co-operating anymore,”

“What does that mean?” She went quiet, “Sevika?” You asked, only to be met with more silence, “Sevika, why does Vander need my bombs?” You asked,

“That’s the issue… He hasn’t said anything about it, I wouldn’t know-”

“Why does he want me to complete them then?” You asked, frustrated, “If he’s not going to use them, why waste my time making them? Is he appealing to Silco? Is he… Is- I don’t fucking know,” You sighed, annoyed as Sevika shrugged, taking the cigarette and stumping it out into a freshly cleaned ashtray by the side of your bed,

“He mentioned he’s ‘growing up',” You scoffed, “I know,” Sevika replied, taking Silco’s knife from you and playing with it in her hands. After a moment, she looked to you, “(Y/N),” You turned your attention to her, “You know he means well,” She said, “They both do. I just… Silco is a good leader. When I look at him, I see strength and devotion. When I look at him, I see a better life for us all. He just lacks the experience,” She said, “I don’t see the same with Vander,” She admitted. You only nodded your head, “But Vander has the drive and the children of Zaun’s best intentions in his heart. That’s the issue,” She said,

“I don’t like this,” You muttered, “Something’s gonna happen. I’m calling it now. I don’t know what but it’s… Tense,”

“It is,” Sevika agreed, handing the knife back to you, “Go give this back to him. It’ll give you an excuse to talk this out,” She said,

“We both know Silco doesn’t just carry one knife. He won’t miss it,” You said playfully, but the smile you had quickly faded,

“You guys don’t usually fight like this,” She pointed out,

“I know,” You acknowledged, “It’s strange…” You agreed, sighing softly and glancing at the door. You felt a heavy hand on your shoulder and you glanced over at the girl, now standing beside you and towering over you,

“You guys are close. Just talk to him and prove you’re loyal,” You nodded,

“Thanks, Sevika,” You gave her a sincere smile, something she reciprocated before leaving you,

“Don’t mention it,” she said softly, disappearing out of the room,

“Don’t hurt them more than they already are,” Swimming through the darkness again “They don’t need any more injuries,”

“I’m trying, boss,” A woman's voice. Raspy and low, “It’s hard to be careful and quick,” Annoyance,

“Well try harder,” No laughter. Their voices and footsteps faded away,

You found Silco easily, up on the rooftops of your apartment again, one hand tucked into his pocket, while the other bringing a cigarette to his lips as he leaned against a wall. There were peaks of the orange sky that indicated a blooming sunset around him, and you caught sight of the smoke rising from his lips in large clouds, catching on the chilling breeze and dragging them away swiftly. Hearing the creaks of the metal corrugated roof beneath your feet, his attention focused on you, blue eyes calm as you approached,

“I spoke with Sevika,” You said, pulling a pack of your own cigarettes out and producing one of your own. You stalled some time by fumbling with the matches, but were surprised to feel Silco’s hands against your own, taking the box from you and lighting your cigarette. With a small nod of thanks, you placed yourself next to him on the wall, inhaling the smoke,

“And?” He asked. He expected an answer- perhaps to his question from before. You tapped your foot against the floor, sighing softly,

“And what?” You asked, but he shook his head,

“You know what,” You could feel the ice still clinging to his words. You let out a small sigh, letting the smoke out of your mouth,

“Truthfully, I don’t want to choose between either of you,” You frowned, letting yourself move off the wall and begin pacing infront of him, “I don’t want people hurt, but I know that with Piltover, violence is the easiest way to get to them,” You sighed, running a hand through your hair, “Stars, I… Do you know what Vander wants with my bombs?” You asked, stopping your movements and staring at Silco, “Sevika either doesn’t know or won’t tell me. You saw yourself how much he wanted me to get them finished. If he wants things to go peacefully, why does he need the bombs?” you pondered,

“Plan B, perhaps,” He breathed, smoke rising from his lips and catching on the wind picking up around you, “I don’t truely know what exactly Vander is doing or planning nowadays… He’s keeping things to himself and not talking to me or Sevika. It’s making me nervous,” He glanced at you, “Haven’t you noticed it?”

“Well, it’s not the first time you’ve been keeping secrets from me,” You countered, returning to the wall next to him as you heard him sigh, head falling back against the wall, “Why do you two not trust me? I understand you’re brothers, I know that. But you tell Sevika about Vander’s wavering attitudes and not me?” You asked with a frown. Looking at Silco, you noticed he had an unreadable expression on his face. It was curious, usually, you had known him for so long but he’d never looked like this; it was an unfamiliar emotion that confused you. He looked like he wanted to speak but the words escaped him, falling short, dissolving on his tongue before he could speak them into the wind,

“Do you forgive me?” He asked, “For calling you weak? You’re far from that, (Y/N). I shouldn’t have said it,” He said, sparing you a glance. His head was hung in a sort of apologetic way, hair framing his face nicely, and he looked everywhere but you. You bit your lip, considering his words.

With a sigh, you extended his knife back to him, accompanied by a small nod. He returned one of his own, putting the knife back in its place and leaning next to you once more, closer now, so your shoulders touched,

“You know I value loyalty, (Y/N),” He spoke softly, voice low, “Especially those closest to me, those I share a home, and a bed with,” turning to meet his blue gaze, he quickly averted his eyes, opting to take another long drag of his cigarette, “I’m… Close to you in a way I don’t think I’ve ever been with anyone,” he admitted, and you simply stared at him, the words making your head go blank. Whatever else he had to say was left unsaid, and as you looked at him, you saw he was, once again, lost deep in thought, the cigarette in his fingers idly letting off smoke. His brows were furrowed and his blue eyes were cast downwards, unmoving. He felt your stare but said nothing. And in turn, you didn’t speak. You finished your cigarette, throwing it to the floor and stepping on it, before making your way back inside the building, “(Y/N),” You turned sharply, maybe too sharply. Maybe you wanted to hear him say something else. Maybe he wanted to say something else. Or finish what he was saying. Instead, you nodded your head,

“I forgive you, Silco,” You turned the corner and glanced at your shaking hands as you headed back inside.

“How are they?” Footsteps increasing and decreasing in volume. Pacing, “Will they live?” Desperate,

“Their injuries aren’t severe,” A rough voice- close. An unfamiliar accent, “But they have a concussion and potential damage to the brain. That explains the lapsing consciousness,” cold surrounded you. A sudden bright light and a figure. The air was heavy, and scents of smoke and chemicals filled your lungs,

“I’m asking if they will live,” The words punctured the air. The louder voice became muffled. Darkness again.

You hadn’t expected your choice to have to come so soon,

“Sevika?” You addressed the girl, who sat in her room on her bed polishing a sword “Do you know where Silco and Vander are?” You asked, finally appearing from the workshop. Usually, if he had somewhere to be the following morning, Silco would let you know the night before. If it was urgent and he didn’t have time, he would always return by midday, eat whatever food was available, and scurry off again. He did neither of them today. Sevika glanced up at you with a disinterested shrug,

“Why should I care what they’re doing?” She grunted,

“I thought you and Vander were close,” You folded your arms,

“We’re friends,” She glanced up at you, “Are they not back yet?” She shook her head, “Then they’re busy. Leave them alone and go back to doing whatever it is you do,”

“I would but my brain won’t leave it alone, they’re usually back by now, even for a moment- to eat something, or get more money,” You said worriedly,

“Maybe you should tell your brain to shut the fuck up,” She said, clearly more annoyed than usual, “They’re probably just busy and got caught up, and haven’t checked the time,” Biting your tongue, you moved back to your bed to wait. The hours ticked by, and as much as you tried to make yourself busy, your worry ate away at you, a weight settling in your chest. You glanced up as you heard movement in the main room of the apartment. Setting down two knives- one had been used to carve something into the hilt of the other- you walked to the door and leaned against it, watching Sevika stretch in the centre,

“They’re not back yet?” You asked, shrinking slightly behind the doorframe at the glare she gave you, clearly startled,

“No, if they were, Silco would go straight to you,” She said angrily. Seeing you open your mouth to speak again, she quickly interrupted you, “If you’re so fucking worried about him, why don’t you go find him yourself!?” She asked loudly, gesturing to the door,

“Fine. I will,” You said, retrieving the sharper of the two knives and leaving the room, throwing on your jacket, ignoring the burning glare Sevika gave you as you passed her.

As soon as you set foot outside and the door slammed behind you, your realised you had absolutely no clue where to even start looking. Walking down the street you glanced up, hearing the booms and cracks of thunder overhead. Delightful. You sped through the streets, dashing between the crowds and you pulled your jacket over your head as the rain began pelting you from overhead, flashes of lightning illuminating your feet. Blindly, you searched for the boy in the places he brought you to, hoping and praying to the stars above you would find him. Alive.

“They were found just like this? On the street?” More voices. They were so muffled, you could barely hear them. They were far away,

“Yes… The culprits appear to be your own enforcers,” Your body could not shiver,

“Shit… We’ll- I’ll find out who-”

“You’d better be quick and find them before I do. Because when I do, you’ll have hell to pay, Marcus,” Venom. The voice held nothing but venom,

It was the abandoned pier. The wind had picked up and was harsh as it whipped your jacket around, drops of rain scattering across your cheeks. You were utterly drenched and shivering hard, but you had to find him.

He was there.

To your surprise, you found him, body shaking and moving with each heavy breath he took mouth agape and audibly heaving and choking. Water dripped off of him, causing the hard wet pavement around him reflecting the lights around, mixing with a dark substance with it. Blood.

His wild gaze snapped to yours, you saw fear in his… one blue eye. The side of his face was badly massacred, dripping blood like tears down his face. Quickly rushing to his side, you grabbed his arm, throwing it over your shoulder and helping him up, welcoming his weight on top of you,

“Fucking stars above, Silco what happened!?” You asked desperately, clinging to his side and helping him as you stumbled back to your home together,

“Vander…” He managed through gritted teeth, and that’s all you needed for now. You knew the culprit. Someone you had looked up to your whole life. His own brother. It filled you with such spite and hatred, if you weren’t holding on to the person you cared for the most, you would drop him and find that fucker yourself and beat him to the ground and make sure he never- “(Y/N),” As if being able to read your mind, you managed to hear his choked, urgent voice, realising you had slowed your movements, blinded by rage,

“Sorry! Sorry- fuck,” You hissed, letting go of him and letting him lean against the wall of the house. Trying the door, you found it was locked- Sevika was gone. Your eyes widened, not bothering to fumble through your pockets for the keys, as you quickly began to ram your shoulder into it, barely registering Silco’s weak voice calling your name. It finally gave way, sending you toppling inside and almost falling over. You rushed to grab his arm and pull him inside, dragging him to your bed and not-so-gently shoving him onto it, before grabbing the nearby first aid kit. You left momentarily, finding a bowl and filling it with clean water, returning promptly to beginning to look over his wounds.

There were bruises already forming around his neck, the deep purples and large red finger marks appeared against his pale skin. His eye caught your attention again- it was badly beaten and beginning to swell, but amongst the purples and red, you noticed a dangerous black that made your heart clench with fear. You soaked a cloth with some water and reached up to move some of the hair sticking to his face from the residual water, sweat, and blood away. There were deep gashes across his face, sharply cutting into his flesh and into his eye- if that’s what you could even call it anymore. It was likely the work of a knife, judging by their smoothness. As gently as you could, you pressed the cloth to his face. Immediately, he cried out in pain, hands reaching out for you. Harshly, he grabbed your hand, not to pull it away but to seek some sort of comfort. The other gripped your shirt, bunching it up in his bloody fists, bloody knuckles shining in the low light,

“Fuck-” He hissed, and you could feel him tremble against you as you carefully cleaned his face. Moving back to examine him more thoroughly, you grabbed some alcohol to disinfect his wounds, along with cotton pads. You brought your hand to touch his uncut cheek, bringing his attention up to you,

“What happened?” You tried to distract him, gently tucking some of the longer strands of hair behind his ear and glancing at the cloth that was beginning to stain red. He grimaced as you pulled it away, and noticed by now his face had stopped bleeding. You carefully cleaned any residual blood and grime from around his eye, giving you better access to it and the wounds around, before taking the alcohol into your hands and letting the cotton pads soak it in. You couldn’t really tell what had happened to it- it was swollen shut of course but it felt like there was more to it than shown on the surface, “Where- where you by the river?” He gave a weak nod. Worriedly, you began to disinfect the area, grimacing as he winced again at the burning sensation “Silco, you were gone all day-”

“I know,” He said weakly, ragged breaths coming from his lips, one of his hands resting loosely on your arm as you worked on disinfection his face, trying to see if there was anything you should stitch up, “Vander. He did this,” His tone was low, and you firmly put a hand to his chest as he tried to stand up,

“Do not move, you’re going to hurt yourself more,” You said sternly, shifting to cage him in with your body, throwing the used, red cotton pads to the floor. You cast him a small glare and watched as he settled against the pillows with a huff, “You can’t leave here until I finish cleaning this- if this get’s infected-”

“I refuse to stay here with him,” The coldness in his voice made you shiver, and your hands fumbled with the bandages you were readying,

“Where did he even go?” You asked with a frown, pressing gauze against his face gently and reaching with your hand to prop his neck up so you could easily wrap a bandage around his head, holding the gauze in place,

“I left him there. Got out of the waters before he could… He could kill me,” Your hands fumbled at the words, swallowing nervously,

“What happened between you? Why did this even happen?” You asked, shifting as you realised your wet hair had begun to drip on to him. Finally, you deemed there were enough bandages covering his eye, and you firmly tied it up, “We need to take you somewhere- to someone who can-”

“I know where to go,” He stated firmly, sitting up. He was still shaking, and you almost wanted to reach out and hug him,

“Well then come on, we can’t wait, we need to go now before something bad happens to your eye!” You said, grabbing his arm. He didn’t make any move to stand, simply shaking his head, “Silco!! I know you can be a stubborn cunt but just this once can you please listen to me?” You said desperately, letting go of his arm and letting it drop to his side. Worriedly, you watched him, “Please, it’s not-”

“You cleaned it and disinfected it,” You nodded, “That’s enough for now,” He said, single blue eye flicking to look up at you, “Please- stay with me,” He begged,

“But what if he comes back-”

“He won’t… Not tonight,” He said, “Please, (Y/N). I don’t want to be alone I…” He fell quiet, looking away from you. For a moment you stared, blinking at him. Against your better judgement, you reluctantly sat beside him. Instantly, his hand grabbed yours, wincing in pain. Noticing his split knuckles, you carefully tended to them, cleaning them and a few other cuts he had, eyes scanning over the numerous bruises appearing on his skin,

“Silco,” You whispered gently once you finished, allowing your fingers to dance over your burn on his skin, drawing his attention to you, “Do-”

“I don’t want to be alone,” He repeated, moving to rest the uninjured side of his face against your shoulder. You reached a hand to his wet hair, caressing his head and biting your lip. Fine. You’d drop it for now. You’d ask him later, “He betrayed me,” He muttered against you,

“Right,”

“He almost killed me,”

“But you survived,” You said quietly, eyes filling with tears at the thought, “And you’re here with me,”

“It still happened… If you weren’t here-”

“But I was,” You said, moving to gently touch his face, lifting his chin as a way to make him look at you, “And I saved you. And I’d do it again and again if you let me,” You said, watching him worriedly. For a moment he just watched you, lips parted and letting out quick shaky breaths. He then hugged you, arms moving and pressing you impossibly close to him. He shivered against you, no doubt because of the wet clothes clinging to his skin and the injury still causing him pain. You simply held him, running a comforting hand through his hair as you repeated that he was okay in low tones.

You hadn’t even realised you had fallen asleep. The reason that you awoke was the shuffling and rustling of clothes nearby. In the dim room, Silco pulled on his jacket and glanced at you, single blue eye meeting your quickly waking face, watching as you sat up,

“Silco what are-” He quickly shushed you, walking to you and touching his cold fingers against your chin, lifting it up to look at him. His clothes were dry and thick, intended to keep the warmth in. The bandages around his head were still the same ones you had used, and the gauze was darker around where his eye was under it- soaked with blood,

“I need to go,” He whispered, and seeing your eyes widen and lips part, ready to protest, he pressed a finger against your lips, “You can only help me so much, (Y/N),” He said, a second hand coming to your other cheek, brushing a tear already beginning to run down your cheek, "I appreciate that you saved me, but I can't stay here. Not with him," He said lowly. Of course not,

“Do you know where you’ll do” He nodded, and reluctantly let you go, eye skimming over the tears now freely falling down your face. You reached out to touch his hand but he moved it away, “Silco, let me come with you, please...” You weakly begged,

“No- if you leave he’ll… He’ll know I’m alive and he’ll hunt me down. He’ll hunt you down. I won’t let you risk your life for me,” He said, and turned, to leave. You opened your mouth but the words died on your tongue; his mind had been clearly made up. Stuffing his hands into his pockets, you watched him sharply turn, walking for the door, “Silco,” You hissed, and watched him freeze in the doorway, “I… Do want to see you again. Whenever that will be,” You whispered, voice cracking. You watched his tense shoulders drop, with a slight shake. He nodded his head and just like that, he walked out of your life.

Sobs tore at your throat at the sound of the front door closing, and quickly pressed your face into your pillow to muffle your cries. His usual scent of cigarettes lingered in the fabric, only making your hurt that much more prominent, the deep realisation he was gone for the foreseeable future hitting you harder than any punch ever could.

“Goodbye, Silco,” You whispered into the nothingness, shutting your eyes tightly and letting the overwhelming urge to sleep consume you.

For a moment, it was all dark. Once more. You felt your body moving, as if it was floating, and then all at once, it was hurtling downwards. Light slowly flooded your senses, and you felt your heart race, anticipating when you would hit the ground. Luckily, your eyes fluttered open before you could,

“Are you awake?” A familiar voice. Silco’s. His scent of smoke- expensive, not cheap like you were used to- surrounded you, coaxing you to properly awaken. This smoke didn’t make you choke or throat tighten, or your lungs blaze. In fact, you pleasantly let it enter your lungs, with soft inhales at first, then deep, eager breaths. Slowly, you blinked, your eyes adjusting to the dim lights. At first, it was all blurry, the greys, browns and greys mixing in your unclear vision. An orange glow quickly drew your attention, and a few more blinks later you noticed the glowing of Silco’s cigar fade, replaced by a curtain of smoke that momentarily obscured his face. He set the cigar down in an ashtray nearby, red and blue eye’s focusing on you. Seeing you meet his gaze, he appeared surprised, “(Y/N)?” He asked, sitting up from a chair and moving closer to sit on the side of your bed. He reached his hand out, and moving a strand of hair out of your face and tucking it behind your ear. His palm rested against your cheek as you gave him a weak smile, “You’re finally awake,” He breathed, relieved.

“Yeah,” You barely recognised your voice with how raspy it was from not being used in a long time. Lifting a hand to gently rub your forehead, feeling a headache form, you frowned at the feeling of a rough texture. A bandage, wrapping around your head,

“Be careful with that,” He said, and the hand on your cheek briefly left to take a hold of yours, interlocking your fingers together and bringing them away from your face. You could see the genuine worry clear in his features, brows creased as he watched you. Twisting your hand in his, you brought them closer to your face so you could see clearly. You swiped your finger over the long white scar on the back of his hand. Your scar. You could just about see your matching one on your own hand. His scar. You smiled softly, and heard him exhale, “I was starting to fear you wouldn’t awaken,” He said with a soft frown,

“You’re capable of being afraid?” You mused, and smiled wider as you saw the corners of his lips upturn, along with a small exhale of air out of his nose, “What?” You asked,

“I’m only human,” He responded, in a soft, whisper-like tone, “It’s easy to forget, I know. But it’s true,” He remained to hold your hand firmly in his as you told him about the pleasant memories you had dreamed of your adolescence together, watching as he smiled fondly. In turn, he filled you in on what you had missed in the near two weeks you had been lapsing in consciousness. And even though your head, joints, and body ached and screamed in pain, you relished in his gentle company, listening as he moved on to recalling the happier parts of his week- although rare. The mention that Jinx had requested brand new paints intrigued you, and you asked him if she could bring them to you when he could. All that truly mattered to Silco was you were back and alive. Talking about your fight at the abandoned building could wait just another day.

#volatilearcane #silco #arcane #arcane silco #arcane netflix #silco my beloved

[silcoseye]

P7: Recovering and Healing Through Time

info: "It's been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8

info: eek! this chapter is the penultimate one ;P dreading writing part 8 because I really don't know how to end this and hoping u all like it ;-; stress stress.  thank you so much for reading this you mean the whole world to me, thank you for liking my silly goofy story <3

warnings: concussion mentions, general injury mention, shimmer taking/drug use, angst, hurt/comfort, almost declaration of love ;) not yet babies you have to wait hehehehe, ep 3/4 spoilers but that's pretty expected throughout right?

4190 words

This night was peaceful, and despite the aches in your joints and more bruised areas, you slept well. When you woke, blinking and rubbing the sleep from your tired eyes, you took in your surroundings. This wasn't your home- or any place you really recognised. The room was small, and thoroughly cleaned, the ceiling sloping down the sides indicating it was right under the roof. Only your large bed could fit in here, along with a bedside cabinet. The window was high enough to shed actual beams of white sunlight inside but there were no overhead lights- only a few candles near your bedside, along with a box of matches.

Sitting up was more painful than it should have been. Even being as slow and careful as you could possibly be, pain shot through your body, intensifying a headache that seemed to haunt you since you first woke last night. Weakly, you tilted your head, eyeing the side of the room you hadn't been able to look at yet, and you discovered more minimal furniture- another bedside cabinet and a chair. It didn't look like something you could sit in for long periods of time without getting uncomfortable, considering the straight back and wooden form, but what surprised you more was the sight of Silco's black and red coat draped over the back. He must be nearby. Glancing back to your side, you noticed a cigar cutter along with an ashtray piled with finished cigar ends, and a shiny lighter glowing in the warm light of the candles nearby. Gazing upwards, you saw no lingering smoke. The only sign of it was through smell, but you guessed by the way it intensified when you turned to the jacket it was coming from there.

Your most severe injury was a concussion. From what you remembered of your short conversation last night, Silco had brought you to 'The Scientist' from the underwater lab he had taken you to a while ago. He was the one who cleaned and bandaged you. From the window though, you could tell you were no longer underwater. Just... somewhere else. Your hand touched the course material wrapping around your head, a thick gauze at the back from where it had been bashed into a wall. That's where your headache was strongest. Silco had also mentioned it had been almost two weeks since the incident that had caused your extensive injuries, and wouldn't give you more details, begging you to rest and talk to him in the morning,

"You're awake," Your head moved too quick, drawn to the noise coming from the door, shooting pain through your skull and causing you to hiss, "Ah, my apologies," His voice was soft as you barely heard his footsteps approach you, sitting in the chair beside, indicated by a creek, watching you worriedly.

"It's fine... My head... It just hurts. A lot," You managed to wince out through gritted teeth,

"Concussions are severe injuries, obviously they'll hurt," he said,

"That's very helpful, Silco," You said sarcastically, taking some pills he had given you, and swallowing them with the glass of water he handed you. Eagerly, you finished the glass, taking a few deep breaths once you finished it. His colder fingers gently brushed against yours as he took it, and set it on the bedside table, "Thanks," He only nodded,

"I spoke with the scientist. He asked me to make sure you still had your memories," He said, eyes darting over your face. You smiled,

"Are you here to quiz me?"

"In a way," He said, the corners of his lips lifting slightly, "Where do you keep the knife I gave you?

"In the draw next to my bed. It's wrapped in the cloth you snagged and wrapped it in too. I kept everything you gave me," You spoke, "The tools, the lighter-"

"The lighter?" He asked, narrowing his eyes,

"Don't you remember?" His gaze was unwavering, "My, Silco, the scientist should check your memory instead of mine," You smiled, "The night we got our markings you stumbled into an ally full of trash and found a lighter. I topped it up with alcohol and we used it to sterilise the needle-" You lifted the scarred hand to show him, and instinctively he brought his to touch yours, the marks lining up across your hands. His skin was cool against yours, and you faintly noticed your heart rate quicken at the contact, "-and then we got these. Bound together forever" You echoed softly,

"You kept that old thing?" He mused, leaning his elbows on the bed, closer to you. You nodded,

"Course. I kept everything you gave me," You reminded. Your smile wavered as you glanced away, "I'm sorry about the clothes you gave me. They were wonderful, really. I loved them. You have good taste- obviously, you always did," You rambled, "But yeah- if I'd seen the inside pockets earlier I would have-"

"Do you know who did this to you?" His voice was low and dangerous, his gaze snapping to your eyes and refusing to let you look away, captivating you with his miscoloured stare. Your dry lips parted, suddenly nervous at the cruel ideas that  flooded your brain asking what he had in mind for the attackers,

"I-"

"And before you try and defend them, remember what they did," He spoke coldly, straightening, "Leaving you for dead in the alleyway and robbing you clean of all you had. You are the innocent- the victim. They deserve punishment," His tone was menacing, full of evil and spite, speaking in low, warning hisses,

"I... Don't know their names,"

"But you know their faces?" You slowly nodded, so as to not disturb your injury, "I'll bring you pictures. You point them out. I'll have them dealt with," he moved to stand,

"What about Marcus?" You asked, watching him freeze as he moved to leave. His one blue eye widened, allowed by the presence of the eyelid and he looked down at you sharply,

"How d-"

"You spoke with him while I was unconscious," You told him, "I didn't hear it all. I heard you wanted to find them. He was... Worried," You frowned, watching him

"Marcus wasn't worried about you he was 'worried' about saving himself," He hissed, "You shouldn't worry about anyone but yourself right now," He said, grabbing the coat from his chair,

"What if I worry for you?" It was bold. So bold it made him freeze again, as if your words were ice. More slowly now, he put on the coat, shuffling with the collar as he attempted to straighten it, buying time. You heard him mumble something, "What was that?" You asked curiously,

"I..." He stopped himself quickly, "You shouldn't," His voice was soft, his gaze was downcast,

"I've always worried for y-"

"(Y/N)," He said, turning to look at you. He let out a sigh, after meeting your curious eyes, and turned to leave again, "You need rest. Please. Just rest," He urged. With the swish of his black coat and the flash of the red inner lining, he was gone. You let out a long breath, gently falling back into the multitude of pillows and staring at the ceiling, letting your heart race wildly in your chest. Stars, you almost confessed your feelings right there and then- you'd never been more terrified in your life.

You weren't in your home. That was very clear. More hours passed and you studied the grey walls and yet you could not work out where you were. The window gave no helpful clues either, being too high up to see where exactly you were. The absence of any thumping music told you you weren't near the 'Last Drop' either.

Silco had returned a while later, asking if you had slept. He was now without his coat, having removed it elsewhere, and rolling up his sleeves as he helped you sit up once more,

"Where are we?" You asked, looking up at the man above you,

"Why do you ask?"

"Because I'm trying to figure it out," You said,

"My home," He answered simply. Silco had a spare room? For what, you could only imagine,

"You don't work and sleep in the same place?" you asked curiously, the hint of amusement clear in your tone,

"Do you take me for a maniac?" you laughed at his same dry humour, eyes widening at the sandwich he presented you with, "I asked Jinx to buy them for you for breakfast," He informed you as you eagerly chewed,

"Mmph- It's the morning?" He nodded, "What time?"

"Just after seven,"

"Jinx'll be starting her lesson soon-"

"Jinx's lessons are cancelled on the occasion her teacher is unfit to teach," He said sternly, raising a brow as he silently challenged you, "Once you get better, they will resume. I'll figure something else out for her to do while we wait," He said with a small sigh, picking up your now empty plate and setting it down on your bedside,

"She could always come here," You offered. He raised a brow at your suggestion, "I don't mind her company. You know that well," He hummed,

"I'm just afraid that her... Energy will be too much for you to handle," He said with a sigh, "What you need now is to rest as much as you can- sleep for as long as you can. Here, you are safe and away from all danger in the undercity," He spoke softly, watching you, "You will be staying here until you heal," He left no room for argument. You sighed deeply, moving to nod your head but wincing at the sudden movement,

"Ahh... Can you at least get me a clock of some sort? So I know what the time is," He nodded,

"Anything else?" He asked,

"Do I have a limit?"

"Now you do," He narrowed his eyes, and you laughed,

"I want to see Jinx. It's been two weeks you say?" He nodded to confirm, "Then I want to see how she is. I hope she's missed me too,"

"She has," He said softly, his tone changing. He opened his mouth and drew in some air, ready to add something. Unfortunately, the words died on his tongue, and he simply closed his mouth, "She has," He simply echoed, frowning. You watched him for a few moments before he eventually straightened and moved to leave,

"Hey Silco," You called to him, "I missed you too. Send her up here when you have to leave for... Business. Or whatever it is you do," You teased, watching his shoulders slump as he nodded his head, and left. Sleep quickly overtook your thoughts, calming your racing heart and lulling your loving thoughts to sleep

When you awoke, you sensed a presence in the room. Glancing to your side, you noticed the familiar blue hair braided into twin braids. Jinx was facing away from you and, curiously, she was painting on her arm, humming a familiar song. She had paints set out in front of her, along with a plate that had blue and white mixed into various shades. She was wearing a shirt with open shoulders, and plumes of light blue covered her skin in wonderful swirls. You smiled at the sight,

"Those look lovely," You rasped, making her whip her head around, one of the long braids flying through the air. With a Cheshire grin, she stood, dropping the paintbrush on the floor and running towards you, flinging her arms over you. So what if the blue paint stuck to your sheets and coloured the shirt you wore?

"(Y/N) you're awake!" She grinned happily. You pat her hair gently, cradling her head as she pulled away, "You missed so much, sleepy! Check out all these cool paints dad got me," She said, looking at her arm and frowning, seeing the blue rubbed off, "Oh shit- are-"

"Language, little miss," You teased, poking her nose, and wincing as you moved to sit up once more,

"Are you okay? Did I do something? I'm sorry about the paint," She quickly said. Once you had sat up comfortably, you smiled, patting the bed next to your legs,

"You didn't do anything. I'm not mad about the paint- it's a lovely addition to these dreadful grey sheets really," You said, your own smile matching hers, "I think Silco's good fashion sense doesn't stretch over to interior design," You teased, only to be met with her blank gaze. With a slight sigh, you spoke again, "I'm glad to see you here,"

"I'm glad you woke up," She said, her gaze drifting away, eyes glossing over. Whenever she reminisced on the pass, Jinx would fall quite like this. Thinking quickly to try to break her out of it, you opened your mouth, only to be cut off, "Anyway- dad's been way more worried than me," At that you blinked, staring at her,

"Silco's... Been worried about me?" you asked slowly, watching as she eagerly nodded,

"He's still worried about you," She grinned, "You shoulda seen him. Walking around all mopey and angry- like this!" She hopped off the bed quickly, putting her arms behind her back and exaggerating her frown as she began to pace, "They're not awake yet, Jinx. They haven't died, Jinx. Not so loud, Jinx, they need to rest, Jinx!" She repeated in a lower tone, attempting to mimic his accent but failing, comically. Your laughter brought on a headache, but you fought through it. Placing a hand over the bandage on your head, you tried to quell it somehow, but your wince gave away your pain. Baring your teeth, you realised your ears were ringing, now. Glancing over, you saw her at your side with wide eyes full of fear,

"Aaah- don't worry. It's just a headache," You managed, but let your head droop into your hands, holding it in both of them. You felt a gentle touch on your arm, and glancing over, saw she was holding out a purple liquid in a small vial. Blinking through the black spots in your vision, you took it from her,

"Drink it," Her worried voice sounded like it was underwater, and without thinking, you downed the vial. You expected a reaction similar to Silco's- whole body cringing in pain- or recreational users high... But it never came. In fact, it was far more pleasant than you had expected, and as you leaned back it felt like you were suddenly floating on a cloud. Your vision cleared, and within a few blinks, you could see Jinx's face clearly as she watched you with worry etched across her face. With a small sigh, you handed her the empty vial,

"Thanks... What was in that?" You asked curiously, watching as she began playing with the vial. She shrugged her shoulders,

"It's shimmer- the scientist brought it for you," She explained, setting the vial down and jumping onto your bed near your legs, beginning to pick at the blue swirls around her arms, "I heard him mention it was special- weaker but still effective. He's still working on it, but it helped you," She looked up to make sure, and nodded her head, "You'll be okay." You watched her for a few moments more, swallowing to try to moisten your dry throat and glancing around,

"Do you have any water that's not for paints?" You asked a slight croak to your voice. She nodded, retrieving you a glass and helping you drink. It was almost as though you couldn't feel much of the pain in your body anymore- only dull aches when you lifted your arms to drink the contents and thanked her, watching as she resumed to pick the paint, "Why're you painting on your arms and not the notebook I got you?" You asked curiously. She looked up with a small smile,

"I like the way it looks. I liked the clouds outside. And the smoke after a successful bomb explodes," She said, tracing one of the not cracked, darker blue swirls with a smile, "And it feels nice on my arms,"

"Mmm.. I bet it does with this heat setting in," You said, "They look pretty," You told her, mirroring her beaming smile,

"I'm sorry your head hurt because of me," She said, the happy tone in her voice fading away as you frowned,

"Hey, you didn't... It's fine, Jinx. You didn't do anything bad," You assured her, smiling, "My headache's gone now,"

"Really?"

"Poof!" You mimicked with your hand moving away from your head, "I'm all better now," She smiled, humming, "Would you wanna paint on me later?" You asked, watching her eagerly nod and bring them over, the paints cooling over your skin as she used your arms as a personal canvas. The calm strokes lull you back to sleep.

When you awoke, you felt tugging at your arm, the sigh of Silco washing your skin clean of the blue appearing before your hazy vision. He was illuminated by the candlelight now- you must have fallen asleep again. Jinx was nowhere in your sight to see her creations washed away,

"Hey I liked those," You protested, making him pause and glance up at you,

"I had to change your sheets. I brought you fresh clothes too," He said, going back to washing you off,

"They brought colour to this room," You protested, "It looks nicer now,"

"It's a mess,"

"To you," You argued, rolling your eyes at his stern gaze. He let out a sigh, tiredly whipping a hand over his face as he finished, letting the stained cloth he had been washing you with drop to the floor,

"How are you feeling?" He asked,

"Better after the Shimmer," His eye widened at your comment, "Wha-"

"How did you get ahold of... Did Jinx give it to you?" He asked his frown setting in more as you nodded, "She shouldn't have..." He said calmly, his foot anxiously tapping the floor now,

"Why?"

"It's still experimental. I meant to get rid of it when Singed gave it to me to test on you but she must have found it..." He sighed, leaning back in the chair and stretching his hands out in front of himself,

"Is it so bad? I feel better Silco," You tried to say, but with a shake of his head, he dismissed your words,

"It's experimental. Singed wanted me to test them on you," He restated,

"And?" You watched his eyes spark with anger for a moment, "What? You use shimmer all the time for your eye and-"

"That's different," He countered, voice edging dangerously close to venomous, "You shouldn't be used for experimental purposes by him... He has enough test subjects as is," You involuntarily shivered at his words, causing him to stand and bring you a blanket, helping stretch it over you,

"I'm not cold," You tried, but he once again wouldn't hear you, "Thank you, mother goose," You teased, and smirked as you faintly saw the corners of his lips upturned in a small smile as he returned to his seat,"

"Don't look so proud," He said, sighing deeply, "I'm only taking care of you,"

"And I'm eternally grateful Silco," You said, watching his gaze drift from you as he nodded. In the silence between you, you thought back to your fight before you left. It had been rather petty, you thought. Perhaps you had been too harsh on him, your words cut deep and from a wounded heart. You regretted them now, "Silco, I'm sorry for those... Accusations," You said, watching his calm gaze fall on you again, interested, "I... Was just hurt. I shouldn't have taken that all out on you that day. Then I wouldn't have been hurt and... Got you all stressed," You said,

"Your apologies aren't needed here, (Y/N)," He said coldly, sighing, "I'll have Marcus do that for me instead," He muttered, and you almost laughed at his declaration if you didn't know better.

"Right," You muttered, "Why... Didn't you come and find me all those years ago?" You asked, watching as he shifted in his seat,"

"The truth is that I was preoccupied," He said bluntly, "I understand that is cruel... After I left to find Singed, I had to stay with him until the rotting around my eye halted. And then I was essentially in debt to him," He said,

"What about our dream of Zaun?" You asked, frowning, "I thought I would at least be by your side when you came to realise it," You didn't hide the hurt evident behind your words, and watched as he shook his head,

"I thought so too," He admitted simply, "However things didn't work out that way. I realised it was easier on my own... Until it wasn't," He said, looking up at you, "I had to rebuild my reputation in the shadows, forging it from the pain and disfigurement Vander had caused me... I needed time to plot my revenge," He spoke passionately, yet kept his volume low,

"Ever the dramatist," You muttered, but nodded your head for him to go on,

"I realised in order for Zaun to rise and become the Nation we were destined to be... Vander had to make a choice. I knew if I came to you, you would obviously agree... But I gave him the choice. He could die doing nothing, or live with me and earn the respect we deserved... I would have come for you regardless of Jinx's involvement with it," He admitted, and your eyes widened,

"So she did cause the explosion..." You mumbled, and he finally confirmed your theory with a nod,

"She did. Her talents... I thought her sister, Vi, was the progeny in the family buy Jinx... She is something incredible," He spoke honestly, "Unfortunately, with the explosion she lost her family," He sighed,

"And you saw yourself in her," You finished for him,

"I understood she felt the same loneliness I felt after leaving you that day... That day I lost everything," He admitted, "I hoped I could at least quell those feelings for her. And teach her to control her... Explosions. Teach her to perfect her craft... Who better to turn to than you," He said, and you simply watched him,

"All this time I thought you would have malicious intentions... But you truly do just care for her, Silco," He sighed deeply, nodding, "It's not a bad thing," You quickly said,

"Sevika disagrees," He muttered,

"Sevika's just like that. Stubborn, hardheaded-"

"Sevika lost her arm because of Jinx," Your eyes widened. Perhaps that also explains the ominous glowing blue scar on her cheek,

"And she has a grudge?" He nodded,

"Presumably," He sighed, "She needs to... Get over herself," He said, turning to look at you,

"The girl clearly means no harm... I'm sorry I assumed you... Meant anything bad with your intentions," You said honestly,

"Apologies are useless," He said, reaching over to the side, pulling open one of the drawers of the cabinets and retrieving one of his expensive cigars, cutting off the tip and using the lighter he had to light it, the smoke floating high above your bed, a welcoming smell filling the room as he leaned back, taking a few puffs, "But I understand your concerns... She only needs room to grow," He said, "She knows quite a lot. She only has certain areas she lacks in, correct?" You nodded, "You will prefect them with her and your lessons will end," You could feel your racing heart drop in your chest at this declaration, and you looked away as the sudden sting of tears became present in your eyes. Was he serious? Would this mean the end of... Whatever this was?

"Silco?" Your voice wavered as you spoke again, earning you a concerned hum, "What does that mean?" You asked worriedly. Sensing your sudden overwhelming emotions he reached out, placing his cold hand atop yours,

"It means you won't be teaching her anymore," He simply stated, watching you nod, "You will of course still stay here," You looked up at him with misty eyes, "Did you think I would let you go back to that dingy apartment of yours?"

"But I won't be working for you anymore," You couldn't hide the fear and shakiness in your voice. This almost-year of working for him had brought you more happiness than you had experienced in the decade spent without him, and the idea of losing that terrified you more than you wanted to admit, "I wouldn't be useful to you anymore I-"

"(Y/N)," He brought your attention to him again, "This was never about you working for me... It was always about seeing you again and having you in my life once more," He declared softly, the cigar idly burning, set in the now cleared ashtray as he stared into your eyes. Blinking rapidly as you felt tears slipping down your face, he reached a hand up to wipe them with his thumb, caressing your cheek,

"Honestly?" You asked, to which he smiled, leaning forward. His lips touching the bandage on your forehead made your face and skin heat and flare a soft red in the orange light,

"Honestly," His voice was close to your ear as he spoke softly to you, and enough confirmation you needed. Silco cared for you and that was enough at this moment. He wanted you around because it was you and no other reason. He cared. He cared and it filled you with so much joy, the laugh that escaped your lips surprised you. A smile appeared on your lips and seemed permanently fixed there. Pleasant, and happy. Euphoric, and blissful.

#volatilearcane #silco #arcane silco #arcane #silco my beloved #arcane netflix #silco arcane #arcane league of legends #arcane spoilers

[silcoseye]

I forgot how wholesome Jason's lives are i'm over here smiling so much aaaaa

also??? editing this chapter WHILE watching the live???? A whole different, beautiful vibe hehehe

#volatilearcane #silco #arcane silco

[silcoseye]

the smut i write won't be good. just so you horny simps know.

but i'll write it. i'll write it ;-;

#arcane silco #arcane netflix #arcane #silco my beloved #silco #silco x reader #volatilearcane #smut #silco smut

[silcoseye]

people in this fandom are so so so lovely reading comments across the fanfic platforms about how much people enjoy my work has be tearing up and sobbing and smiling so much you're all so lovely thank you all for reading <333

#volatilearcane #arcane #arcane netflix

[silcoseye]

hi simps ;)

working on part 3 of volatile. uwu

#volatilearcane #silco my beloved #arcane spoilers

[silcoseye]

a little update on part6! I'm gonna try and get it out before Sunday :p most of the scenes are finished I have 2 left to finish and the others just need to be connected together :p and the whole thing needs to be edited ;-; sigggggghhhh

#volatilearcane

[silcoseye]

I'M going to try to work on part 7 next week!! i'll (finally) be double/fully vaxed and because of a strike at my uni i'm getting the f u l l week off :)

who cares if I barely went in all january because of pain ;)

i have 2 essays to finish for thurs and friday wish me luck beauties and have a wonderful day <3

#volatilearcane