HW: 297lbs BMI: 58 12/2022
SW: 265lbs BMI: 51.7 08/2023
CW: 247lbs BMI: 48.2 1/30/24
GW1: 220lbs BMI: 43
GW2: 200lbs BMI: 39.1
GW3: 180lbs BMI: 35.1
GW4: 160lbs BMI: 31.2
UGW: 140lbs BMI: 27.3
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I just finished a book called Watch Me Disappear by Janelle Brown, and it's a relatively small part of the story, but it handled a subplot about one of the main characters realizing she's gay in a really interesting way that I just wanted to share somewhere.
Don't get me wrong, both in what I like to read and what I write, I'm all about the angst that comes with putting a name to how you identify and coming out-- provided there's at least a glimmer of a happy ending to go along with it. But I've definitely seen posts where people rail against that narrative. That they've seen it too often, can't we also have stories where queer people are just queer and it's not a big thing? And it's not that either of those genres of LGBT+ storytelling is wrong. (Though I think we can all agree it sucks when a character's queerness is their entire personality.) It's just about what you prefer to read. And though I tend to lean towards the angst and insecurities in fiction, I do really enjoy casual queerness also. Because that part strikes really true for me. After a while, it does kind of just dissolve into the bigger picture of who you are. (Or at least, it has for me.)
So onto this book specifically. It was super interesting to see Olive realize she likes other girls, because it really wasn't a big deal. To her. You know who does take it kind of drastically?
Her best friend, who's a very modern teenager, all read up on theoretical LGBT+ issues, who outs her to the school's Gay-Straight Alliance president, thinking she's doing her a favor-- that the label and shoving her into a presumably like-minded community is a gift. Outing someone is never cool, so as you can probably imagine, Olive doesn't take it well.
And also her dad, who said former best friend also basically outed her to, who spins into a mini panic about why his daughter didn't tell him herself. Does she think he wouldn't be supportive!? etc.
It was a super refreshing take for me. (The book is mostly about Olive's mom, who disappeared on a hiking trip, presumed dead, but who Olive is starting to suspect may have been kidnapped or possibly just left them. So she's clearly got some bigger things on her mind.) I've got some mixed thoughts on the book overall. But this particular aspect was a part I really enjoyed.
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imagining the story from pei ming's perspective is rlly funny i think. this god from all that time ago ascends again (you were there for the first two times) and immediately waltzes into a situation that fucks something up for your descendant (putting both of your reputations on the line, messing up how hard your descendant worked to become a god and how hard you worked to ensure that he would have that chance) and then refuses to let you smooth the situation out and on TOP of that your friend's little sister (who hates you and who you are trying to look out for by request of your friend) is on your case about it too. so you've gotta work all that out and then like. you chill for a little bit (still kind of upset about your descendant) until your friend undergoes a heavenly calamity. and then in the space of like A Day the god from earlier shows up again with a fucking ghost king, your friend dies, the little sister you're supposed to be looking out for disappears, and everything just kinda goes to shit. so you're like. grieving. trying to process everything. until your OTHER close friend goes off the fucking rails with the spirit of that guy she murdered, and then you get called out to the spooky ghost mountain where you're confronted with the girl whose death YOU were essentially responsible for and have never really come to terms with, and then like. you just kind of hang out with these gay people until everything resolves itself. fight some ghosts. fight the heavenly emperor. get your friend to stop being evil for a little while so she can fix the filing systems. and then you just have to keep being the god of love i guess
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