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vintagemulti · 2 years

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rainfall

pairings: bradley “rooster” bradshaw x pilot!reader

desc: you’ve always had a thing for your best friend. this mission didn’t help.

warnings: this is quite long😵‍💫, swearing, sex references and innuendos, alcohol and drunkness, death and family member loss, dissociation mentions, i know NOTHING about pilots/flying sorry, this WILL be a series !!!

a/n: someone tell me to stop making series. i beg. this is my little writer brain not being able to watch anything without making a character WHOOPS. anyways, i’ve not seen the first top gun. so. cannon? who? we don’t know her. also i hate called bradley rooster i can’t work out why but i’ll only refer to him as it when flying. soz.

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you had been in bali when you got the call. you and bradley, in bali, relaxing. but who ever said naval pilots get to relax?

it was something you had gotten far too used to, having to pack up your things and get the first flight back to the states. sure, you had been the one to chose this career and the disruptions you faced were consequences of your own actions, but you had really - really, really - hoped that you didn’t get called up when you did.

two weeks in bali with bradley bradshaw, the highlight of your year. it had been planned for almost a year, which was saying something. normally you and bradley would say you’d do something, and it would never actually end up happening. but no - this vacation had went ahead, and you’d had six days of utter bliss before the dreaded number showed up on your phone.

bradley had been phoned right after you, his reaction being about the same. annoyed, upset but somewhat excited. what the fuck was all this about? both you and him being on the same mission?

and so you had packed all your stuff and made your way back to california, dropped your bags off at your separate apartments and rushed to put together an emergency bag, with your uniforms and workout clothes inside.

that took you up to now, sat in the passenger side of bradley’s new range rover, forty minutes into the drive back to the naval base on lake tahoe. it wasn’t far away now - only ten or so minutes, but the sun was beginning to slowly dip it’s head, ever so slightly.

you were still dressed in your summer clothes, a tight, black dress with white lining and held up by a strap around your neck. it was low cut, a little lower than you’d like for the first time meeting your other teammates, but there wasn’t any time to get changed.

bradley was dressed in the same way, tight white tank top covered in a hawaiian shirt, nude-coloured cargos covering his thighs. and, of course, his aviator glasses. was it really bradley without them?

he turned into one of the roads leading to the hard deck - a bar frequented by everyone within a mile vicinity - and you turned to look at him, right as the sunlight hit him. golden rays washed over his skin, his collarbones shining and under his sunglasses you could see his brown eyes - turned like honey in the light.

you thought he looked beautiful, but you’d never tell him.

“this better be good,” he spoke, breaking the moment of silence. “that hotel cost a fuckin’ fortune.”

rolling your eyes, you nodded. “you’re lucky i remembered we get travel insurance. who was it that was determined we didn’t, again?”

“oh, shut up,” bradley said, but you could see the outline of a smirk on his mouth. “no one ever told me we get that.”

“lies!” you laughed. “they put it in the ads, that if you get called up while away, they pay you back whatever you lost.”

it was bradley’s turn to roll his eyes. “alright, miss ‘i always read the fine print’.”

“at least i can read,” you joked back.

electing to ignore the snide comment he made back, you reached into the passenger side compartment, searching for your own sunglasses - feeling nothing. you looked around the car, sighing in defeat as you realised you must have left your pair at home.

spotting another pair of aviators on the dashboard, you picked them up. “can i borrow these?”

bradley looked at what you were referring to, almost laughing when he saw his spare glasses in your hand.

“go ahead, sugar, i won’t need ‘em.”

putting the sunglasses on, you pushed down the butterflies in your stomach that flew around with the pet name.

the hard deck came into view, looking busy already. it was so loud - you could practically hear the music playing from the jukebox all the way out here.

“takes you back, huh?” you asked.

“that it does,” bradley pulled into a parking spot. “feels like yesterday we were here last.”

“wrong,” you undid your seatbelt. “yesterday we were in a five star villa in bali.”

opening the car door, you stepped onto the concrete, your heels clicking against the ground. why did you wear these again? good god, it would be a long night. bradley joined you, walking towards the front door of the bar. it was so loud now - it was like you were already inside.

he pulled the door open, letting you in first. fireworks exploded all over your body as his hand moved around your waist, letting him manoeuvre himself to be standing next to you. you let him take the lead to where the rest of your team appeared to be, and you watched him walk - his swagger that was just so fucking hot almost making you forget you were stood completely still.

most of the faces you recognised - actually, you recognised all of them. pheonix, hangman, fanboy and payback we’re speaking to bradley, and someone you had recently been introduced to was the first person to notice you.

“rainfall! hey, how’s it going?” bob smiled at you, the other people snapping their heads to look at you as well.

“yeah, alright, how’re you?” you answered, him nodding a reply.

“wow,” hangman spoke first. “both rooster and rainfall arrive late, not in uniform? been busy, you two?”

“about as busy as your mum, hangman.” you retorted, those around you letting out a surprised laugh.

“that’s not the most important question,” pheonix tilted her head. “what the hell is this? what can they possibly be trying do here?”

you furrowed your eyebrows, prompting her to go on; “well, we’re the best there is. who the hell can teach us?”

the question took you by surprise - but it wasn’t irrelevant. the only briefing you had was this was a training program for an intense mission, and only those who had came top of the top gun class would be accepted, so, pheonix was thinking right. who could possible teach the best pilots out there?

a bell rang throughout the bar, interrupting your thoughts. everyone cheered, knowing exactly what the bell meant.

“poor guy,” rooster mumbled. “i’m going to the restroom, get me a drink?”

you nodded, walking over to the bar.

he wasn’t recognisable at first - he looked so different. but it was the eyes that gave it away, he was still young behind the eyes.

“it’s you, then.” you mumbled, taking the empty spot next to him at the bar.

maverick looked at you, realisation hitting when he clocked who you were. “nice to meet you, rainfall. i’ve heard lost about you.”

“so have i.” looking at him, he wasn’t the man you had built up in your head. he looked nicer.

sighing, maverick nodded slowly. “i thought that’s who you came in with.”

“he won’t want you to teach him, you know that, right? you… you ruined his life, maverick. his mum’s, too.” you said, although you knew it wasn’t anything he hadn’t heard a million times already.

“yep,” maverick clicked his tongue. “i thought that would be an issue.”

“he hates you.”

“i know.”

bradley might have hated maverick, but you didn’t. sure, he was an arrogant ass from what you had heard and he destroyed your best friends family, but you personally had nothing against him.

penny walked over to you, interrupting your conversation with her greetings.

“wow, y/n, you’re here too? damn, what a mission.”

“hey, pen,” you smiled. “i know, i know.”

she raised her eyebrows. “must be serious, huh?”

you raised your hands in defence. “i have absolutely no idea what this mission’s about, swear.”

humming in response, she changed the subject; “what’re you for?”

“uhh, a blue WKD for me and the house beer for brad.”

she nodded, looking at the man next to you. “he’s paying, by the way.”

you almost laughed, turning to maverick. “unlucky son of a bitch. you better take a loan out, maverick.”

“how was i meant to know the rules, huh? i’ve not been here in god knows how long.” he grumbled.

both you and penny chuckled as she served your drinks, taking one in each hand and moving away from the bar, you turned to look at maverick again.

“mav,” you called, and he looked around. “good luck.”

he smiled, nodding. you would admit it would be hard work for him, and it must be difficult to teach the boy who’s father you watched die. but then again, he could have declined the job.

spotting bradley, you walked over to him and handed him the glass of beer. he thanked you, face contorting in disgust as you noticed what you were drinking.

“i don’t know how you stomach that stuff, sugar, it’s all sweetener.”

“says the man who threw up after three of them. they’re only like, three percent as well.”

bradley narrowed his eyes. “all sweetener.”

laughing, you walked with him to join the rest of the group. your feet already began to ache with every step you took, straps digging into your ankle. god - it would be a long night.

if you were counting how many drinks deep you were, you’d have used up all your fingers. you’d been here for a few hours, at least, the sun was almost setting now.

you could see it from the small window in the bathroom, the blur effect on the window turning the sunset into just colour. you didn’t need to pee or anything, just a minute. it was a fair assumption to say you were an extrovert, and loved to be around people, but the noise of the crowd in the bar had become slightly too loud, especially as maverick had just been thrown overboard.

the sound of a piano playing came muffled through the door, followed by a familiar singing voice. it made you smile; hearing bradley drunkenly scream out ‘great balls of fire’.

washing your hands and quickly drying them, you walked back out of the bathroom and into the crowd, thanking the girl who had been holding your drink for you. you walked towards the piano, seeing bradley completely in his element.

“kiss me baby, ooh! that feels good, good!” he sang, everyone joining in.

leaning against the piano, you joined in, the lyrics coming as a second language, this song was practically indented into your brain.

as you sang, you watched bradley’s hands hit every note perfectly, his fingers tracing the keys with a gentle-harshness, something that just about set you off. a man who was good with his fingers? lord have mercy.

he looked at you, as if on cue, smiling as you sang out the words. bradley took a spilt second to remove his hands from the keys, gesturing to his lap.

you tilted your head. he can’t be serious, can he?

“sit!” he called, hands going back to playing the instrumental section.

maybe it was the drinks you’d had, influencing your system. but it took you the whole of two seconds to decide to follow his order, slipping under his arm and placing yourself down on his lap. people around you whooped, especially the ones in your team. had this happened before? you couldn’t remember through the tipsy-horny-lovesick haze that had clouded your vision.

bradley’s leg bounced, making you laughing against his chest. when he started singing, you joined in with him, your voice coming out as more of a tuned shout compared to bradley’s angelic singing voice.

“kiss me baby,” you looked up at him. that second you made eye contact - that whole second - felt like an eternity. it felt like no one was watching, thay for once the love that remained behind your eyes finally appeared behind his, too.

or maybe that was the vodka shots talking.

“ooh! that feels good, good,” he sang.

you looked away, staring at his hands once again while you sang the words. if you had kept staring, you would have seen the way he looked at you while he sang; “i’ma tell the world that you’re mine, mine, mine, mine!”

if you had seen that, you probably would have melted on the spot.

the song came to an end, everyone cheering for bradley’s fantastic piano performance, yourself included. you fell against his chest, laughing like a schoolgirl. he laughed too, taking his hands off of the keys to embrace you.

was this normal for best friends, you wondered? did everyone do this when they were drunk? the answer: wait and find out.

“i’m gonna get a drink,” you smiled at him, finally standing up.

“alright, darlin’, get me a beer?”

“god,” you feigned annoyance. “one day you’ll pay for your own beers, bradley bradshaw.”

you walked away before you heard his mumbled comeback; “yeah, our wedding day.” but, even if you hadn’t walked away, what would you have done?

walking to the bar, you leaned against it, ordering with penny for the god-knows-how-many-th time that night.

“thanks,” you smiled.

“is that a tan line i see?” penny asked, pouring out a beer.

“yep,” you popped the ‘p’. “i was in bali with brad, was supposed to be there until next week.”

“oh,” she sat down one of the glasses. “but you got called up?”

nodded, you took a drink of bradley’s beer, instantly regretting it. “fuckin’ hate the navy sometimes.”

penny stopped in her tracks. “oh, y/n, did i just hear what i think i did?”

your eyes widened. “no, penny, please, i’m seriously broke right now, i’m begging-”

the bell ringing cut you off. hanging your head, you felt multiple people clap your back.

“oh, no, what do we have here?” bradley appeared at your side, laughing.

“this one,” penny giggled. “was insulting the navy.”

bradley exaggerated a gasp, putting his hands over his mouth. “no!”

“yep!”

“tut, tut, tut, lieutenant l/n!” he joked.

you raised your middle finger in response.

“honestly, rooster,” penny was half way away, walking to serve another customer. “get your girlfriend under control!”

the heat rose to your cheeks, head snapping up. luckily for you, you were ninety-nine percent sure that bradley didn’t hear her, but when you were sober, you’d have to tell her off about almost spilling your decade long secret.

“my god, brad,” you walked away from the bar. “i’m gonna be so broke tomorrow.”

he giggled, a sound your drunk mind would have registered as the trumpets of heaven, the best music in the world - every lovely sound put together. god, how in love were you?

“come on, rainfall,” bradley led you to the table the group were all sat at. “the night is young!”

there’s a saying, if you had a dollar for every time this happened, you’d be rich. well, if you had a dollar for every time you’d gotten blackout drunk the day before the first day of training and had to get up at the crack of dawn, you’d have slightly too many dollars. every time, every single time.

as you sat, shoulders straight and hair tied ever so slightly too tight, the commander speaking about something you weren’t properly listening to - the thought of about seventy aspirin was popping into your mind, almost soothing your headache with the sheer thought of it.

footsteps came from behind you, but you didn’t turn around. you knew who it was. instead, you looked at bradley, who was sat in the chair next to you.

as his eyes fell on maverick, you noticed the way his whole smug demeanour fell - for just a moment. you then noticed how he put those walls straight back up, clenching his jaw and shifting in his seat. he cleared his throat, making eye contact with you and raising his eyebrows.

looking away, maverick started speaking.

you must have been truly hungover, because from the second maverick opened his mouth to right now felt like it went by in a blink - you couldn’t tell if you had dissociated the entire time or if you weren’t interested enough to actually pay attention.

zipping up your flight suit, you smiled to yourself. this was your first training exercise for what seemed to be an impossible mission. getting in and out of a thin passage within a minute and a half seemed unrealistic, but compared with the insanely low hard deck and the pull up? you’d be lucky if you made it out alive.

a few planes were already in the air as you stepped onto the tarmac, helmet in hand. looking to your right, you saw two planes, to your left; pheonix and bob doing push-ups.

the exercise was simple; don’t get caught. if you do, you have to do two hundred press ups.

you had almost laughed when maverick set the exercise, how insanely easy it sounded. unfortunately for maverick, he had never flown with you before - he hadn’t quite learnt the meaning of your call sign.

radio chatter sounded from your headset as you climbed into your plane, spotting bradley on the tarmac as well. everyone had insisted you two went last - the top two of the class. even hangman bit back his ego for two seconds to admit that you had finished top of the class, so you should go last.

that’s right, you came top of your class. one of the best pilots of the last decade, apparently. it had earned you quite a reputation, pilots almost always recognising you wherever you went. you were some kind of a legend.

buckling yourself in and triple checking your belts were secure, you pulled your helmet over your head, and your ears were filled with radio chatter. bradley got into the plane next to you, doing the same thing.

“when are we ready to take off, mav?” you asked, closing the top of your plane.

“any time now, rainfall.” he replied.

it was a feeling you always craved, taking off. as a little girl, you used to love going on holiday, just because when the plane would take off and your stomach would turn, it made you smile. from that moment, and from the moment you saw the pilots in all the different documentaries, you knew you wanted to fly planes.

just in a little more extreme way. a way, way more extreme way.

gaining speed, you clicked the needed buttons and flipped the right switches in order to take off, and the tarmac got smaller and smaller as you flew higher into the sky. hearing bradley take off a few moments later, you knew the game was about to begin.

you knew this would be personal for bradley - getting beaten by maverick. anything maverick did to him, it would be personal. you prayed he would be able to separate the pilot from the person, just for a minute.

“good morning aviators,” maverick spoke. “ready to play?”

“oh you are on,” you smiled, still gaining height. “old man.”

bradley laughed over the radio, making you smile even wider.

“for everyone listening over the radio,” you spoke. “get ready to listen to the best flight of your life.”

down on the ground, the rest of the team laughed.

“ready?” maverick asked. “three, two, one… the game has begun.”

you understood the purpose of this exercise - dogfighting. to watch out for yourself while attacking at the same time. playing both offence and defence.

seeing bradley slip into your peripheral, you looked around for the other plane. still gaining height, you hoped to god that your technique would stay reliable.

everything felt like a blur - you were flying so fast, so high, nothing felt real. keeping your eye out for maverick, you swerved through the clouds.

“all alright, rooster?” you hated calling him by his call sign. if felt so… impersonal, weird.

“all good here, rainfall. you?”

you nodded, even though he wouldn’t see it. “no sign of him.”

looking down, you could see bradley underneath you and to the right. he wouldn’t even notice you, if he hadn’t learnt to always look up.

“oh hello, you,” he said, the smugness seeping through the radio.

“hello, rooster.” you smiled.

as you stared down at him, a second plane came into view, far enough away that bradley wouldn’t notice him.

“rooster, on your left!” you called, swerving away as soon as you said it.

“shit,” he mumbled, and you could see him fly away.

“language, folks, come on.” maverick laughed.

“alright grandpa.” you joked back.

looking below you, you could barely see the two planes dogfighting, but from the small glimpse you got, it wasn’t looking great for bradley. maverick was too fast.

“hurry up, rooster,” you spoke your mind. “he’s faster than you.”

“yeah, thanks for that observation.” he grumbled back.

“cheeky.”

from your point of view, the dogfighting was getting even more intense, bradley constantly being tailed by maverick. you hoped once again, that bradley didn’t take this too seriously.

a dial tone broke your thought.

“and rooster, you are out.” maverick spoke over the radio, making you sigh.

“fuck you.”

and there it was; all of your proof that bradley had taken it personally. fuck, this would be a hard one to calm him down from.

“ready to fight, rainfall?” maverick said, and you could almost see his smirk.

pushing everything else in your mind to the side, you let the calm, slightly arrogant side of you take control.

“do you know why my call sign is rainfall?” you asked, already spotting maverick below you.

“i suppose you’re going to enlighten me?”

you let a beat of silence pass, making sure you were in the right position. it was obvious maverick was looking for you, but you were at least fifty feet above him, slightly in front of him. why did no one ever look up?

“or not?” maverick added.

“because,” you paused, gripping your gearstick a little tighter. “rain always comes from above, and you don’t see it until it’s on you.”

with those words, you descended with absolutely no warning. as you came closer to maverick, he seemed obviously surprised, fumbling for a moment to move out of the way so you didn’t fall straight into him.

“jesus, kid,” he mumbled.

“did you know that i came top of my class?” you pulled back up without hesitation, g-force pushing you back ever so slightly.

“yeah, i read it somewhere,” maverick was flying parallel to you. “i wasn’t too of my class.”

“oh, i know,” you somehow managed to keep your tone casual. “iceman, right?”

maverick hummed over the radio, obviously too focused on getting you out.

but your technique was working perfectly. descend on them, climb up, and when the least expect it….

pulling away, you circled around maverick, seeing the outline of a target appear in your helmet. he hadn’t even realised what you had done.

a dial tone sounded through the radio silence, everyone on land holding their breath - even bradley.

“you,” a voice cut through the radio. “are out. good game, maverick.”

the people on ground cheered almost loud enough for you to hear all the way up in the air.

“what the hell?” maverick was in disbelief. “what?”

“i’ll see you on ground, mav.”

the sun was already setting by the time maverick had finished his press ups. he must not have taken in personally, offering to buy you a drink for how well you had flown.

but you didn’t want a drink, you were too concerned with other things. it had been hours since the training had ended, and bradley was still outside, doing press ups.

you walked onto the tarmac, out of your flight suit and in casual clothes, the figure of bradley noticeable - everything still apart from him.

he was shaking, sweating, almost sunburnt. the most noticeable thing was his red eyes, they were so red you thought he must have burst a blood vessel.

“bradley?” you called, getting closer to him. he didn’t answer.

walking right next to where he was, you sat down. sat, right on the hot tarmac - it heated up your legs. “bradley, please,” you called again.

this wasn’t new - for him to do exercise until he just about burst. some people punch walls, some people drink - bradley worked out. maybe it was just as unhealthy as every other coping mechanism.

his arms were so shaky, he almost couldn’t even keep himself up right. you wanted right then and there to take him into your arms, let him cry his heart out and tell him that one day - one day in the future - it will get easier.

as if he could hear your thoughts, he stopped. collapsed onto the ground, arms finally giving in. you could hear him, choking out sobs between breaths - it just about broke your heart.

“come here,” your fingers brushed his arm, and it was like he just needed the instruction to do so, because he moved into your arms and clung onto your shirt, just like a baby.

you didn’t care where you were. no one was looking, anyway. everyone went home or went elsewhere hours ago, you and bradley were most likely the only two people left there.

“what is it?” you cooed, gently running a hand through his hair.

“he- my dad, he- maverick-” and that was all he had to stutter out for you to understand.

“i know, i know,” you bent over him, almost encasing him in your body. kissing his head, you repeated the phrase over and over again.

it was in that moment that for the second time in twenty four hours you thought to yourself - is this normal for best friends to do? it is, right? like, you would do it for any of your other friends?or maybe that’s what you liked to tell yoursef to deny the simple fact;

you were in love with bradley bradshaw, your best friend.

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harryleatherfit · 10 months

Text

Upper East Side || A.U || Frankie Morales

Chapter 11: Opening Night

Frankie Morales x F!Reader

Word Count: 7.8K (i was gonna keep going but Warnings: mentions of fucking bad family, unprotected p in v (um), oral f receiving, mentions of sub space (when you squint at the end), spanking, hard fucking, tit sucking, some fluff, performance on stage, lmk if i’ve missed any

Authors Notes: let me know what you guys think! genuinely this is the longest thing i’ve written but i fear i’ll be hated for the next few chapters 😵‍💫 i love you guys ♾️

Chapter Playlist

Jungle Fever- The Chakachas

Somebody Like You- Bree Runway

Lust For Life- Lana Del Ray

🪩Main Master List🪩 Series Master List🪩

Opening night, electricity filled your body. You woke up with light peeking through your window, you stared at the dust particles floating around, you wish you could stay here forever. Both nights were sold out, your heart racing thinking you had to be on stage tonight. Performing in front of thousands excited you on second thought. You loved the crowd, the air, the excitement as you smiled. You had gotten leads at UNCSA, but nothing could compare to this. You didn’t know where you lay in the acting world at all, but you had to remember that no matter what you would be yourself on the inside.

You had gotten up before Laylah, Rose, and Hannah, making coffee and staring at the sun. You were hoping Frankie was up looking at the same sun. You did breath exercises, prepping your lungs for the amount of talking you had to do for the next few days. Setting your headspace was most important to you. You were scrolling on your phone and Frankies name popped up in the corner of the screen.

New Message:

Frankie: Can you come early to the theater? Somethin I wanna show you.

You: My call times at 3, want me to come at 12?

Frankie: 11.

You: Okayyy, need me to bring food?

Frankie: No, assistants already brought a shit load, I need to see you.

You: Packing my bags as we speak🥱

“Hey hotstuff,” Laylah walks out of your room, yawning, “Smells good. Ready for your big day?”

“Ready as I can ever be.” You shrug, embracing the heat of your coffee cup. The mornings were always so cold.

“Anything planned for the morning?”

“Well, he asked me to come in early, something to show me.” You whisper.

“Oh shit, damn ok,” They get excited, “Have fun gettin old man dick.”

“Laylah!” You laugh.

“Nah, I bet it’s good. Look at him.”

“Believe me I know.”

“Have you guys fucked yet?” They nudge.

“No, but I'm not even sad. So many times guys just want to immediately fuck and it’s such a massive turn off.” You explain, “He’s soft and gentle with me, never in a rush.”

“Yeah me and Bryce haven't done the deed yet. Have high hopes for him. And he also uses my correct pronouns so yay men!” They cheer.

“Well here’s to fucking men I guess.” You click your coffee in the air, “Is he treating you right?”

“We haven’t done much aside from hangout during rehearsals and stuff, so after we’ll actually have time to be with each other.”

“You should go with him after the show tonight, get dinner and walk around the city.” You suggest.

“I think that’s what I’ll do.” They hug you, “My beautiful astonishing Lady Macbeth, I’ll see you tonight.”

-----

You arrive at the theater, New York Streets bustling with people at this hour. Broadway never fails to have thousands of people in and out. Tonight was going to be a big one. Book of Mormon was on, but that show was always on broadway and Macbeth was only on for two nights.

You wondered how many stars were going to come, how many people you loved that would come to see your show. How many playbills you were going to get to sign.

Your interaction with Wes Anderson made you think about your spine, your eyebrow conjecture, the way you present yourself and your character on stage. Everything had to be different. Mattias had a pep talk with you before you left the theater, no matter what happens on this stage, we both know we have put our souls into this show.

It was true, there’s no need to stress about impressing people.

You set your bad down at the entrance, seats already blocked off, ushers clocking in their hours.

“Hey, up here.” Frankie calls up from the theater's booth, “It’s set up a little differently here, Broadway has way more money than our school could ever imagine,” You walk up the steps, “I know so much bigger than our little shabby room at the school.” You take in the scenery of the room.

“I bet you’ve worked here a lot though, right? I mean this is like your job, to do shows for the college, teach the building basics of theater, and fucking work Broadway shows.” How could he act like this wasn’t a big deal.

“Honey, my job is cool and all but doesn't mean I enjoy it. Long hours, having to meet people's demands, spicy celebrities, whiney actors.” He purrs.

“Hey! I’m not whiney, you’re the whiney one, arguing with everyone who pisses you off.”

You hug him, he’s sitting on a stool in front of the lighting board, “I wanted to be an actor actually, but never went through. I never had the courage to do bigger roles and my dad was always focused on my brother. So I just went into tech, it’s easier anyways.” He mumbles.

“Sometimes I wish I went into tech, being an actor is fucking hard,” You stare at him, “Why’d you quit acting? You could never be second to anyone.” You rub his face, hands lingering on his porno stash, his scruff felt like lightening under your fingers.

“When we were in our twenties, he’s a little bit older than I am, he was breaking through the stock market and everyone was shocked. I mean he broke through after 9/11 so he was everywhere.

My dad was disappointed that I wanted to do theater and acting and not anything business related. I was doing mini side jobs for Broadway and small film roles. I went to Spain for some time. Until I started doing this I was finally important to my family.” You back off from him, circling the room.

He hasn’t talked to you about his family too much, he said he’s an open book but you didn’t want to push him too much.

“Sad boring people want to go into the stock market. Margot Robbie was the only interesting thing about Wolf of Wall Street by the way,” You chide, “You're not a fucking disappointment, you’re motivated. You create worlds for people to see, you have so much passion. I wish I was you.”

He moves from his chair, standing up, he’s way taller than you

“Smart girl, go turn off the lights.”

“Frankie,” You stare at him, “We can’t, you know we can’t.” Even though you fucking want to.

“We’re not,” He laughs, “Just go turn them off, I want you to see this.”

You do as told, flipping the switch and returning to your sanctuary.

“Lay down and look up, cmon I’ll do it with you.” He instructs.

You find your way in the dark, glimmer from the ceiling illuminating the room. You lay down as you feel his body next to yours.

“See the ceiling? It’s stars, they painted stars in here for the actors to relax before shows. I’ve done shows here before and they always help me even before a long tech run.” He whispers, the ceiling reminds you of a galaxy, calming and beautiful. He moves to your neck, smelling your hair. You could bathe in his after shave, bask his cologne. He always smelled so expensive.

“Don’t get too comfortable pretty girl, someone could walk in.”

“Then don’t smell so fucking good.” You shove him away, laughing to your side. The pain in your lower abdomen could never subside when you were around him.

“I have something to give to you now, but would you wanna come over to my place later? We could get food, or walk around, or if you want to go back to your place after the show home then we can go there, orwecanjustleave-”

“Shhh,” You shove your finger to his lips, “I would love to go to your place tonight, please. We can finally be alone. Finally be with each other without anyone interrupting us.”

“Ok, ok.” He shakes his head like a giddy boy, “ Oh baby you’re gonna do amazing tonight.,” He kisses you quickly “Before I set up, I wanted to give you these.” He fumbles into his jeans pocket, pulling out two VIP Caroline Polachek tickets.

“No fucking way, you did not do this. Frankie, you did not spend this money.” You squeal.

“Stop, I didn’t spend any money gorgeous. I pulled some strings and magically got them.”

He hands them to you, they were metallic with black printing of the venue and time, with her name in this beautiful ceryllic, you couldn't imagine being in her presence. You’ve wanted to see her since the beginning of college, but you never had the money to go. Since her breakup from Chairlift, you fell in love with her artistry. She was meticulous about what she exposed to the world and you wanted to be like her.

“A little something for an opening night present, and the concert’s before your recital. A win-win.”He looks at you, “I know her new album came out and I know her producer, maybe you’ll get to meet her.” He winks. Get to meet your fucking idol? You were shocked but it was Frankie, of course he would do something like this.

“Don’t worry about tonight darlin,” He holds you, “This weekend is gonna be amazing.”

------

Is this the real life, is this just fantasy caught in a landslide. No escape from reality.

Bohemian Rhapsody was blaring throughout the dressing rooms, never able to run away from Freddie Mercury.

After your soiree with Frankie, you had gone to freshen up, prep your hair and skin. Ate a protein bar and met with Mattias. You blindly went over your scenes, and then he offered some cigarettes You shouldn’t have, but you did.

You fled out the back, door checking to see if anyone would see you. Not that it would matter but felt too familiar. You found a cozy spot, wrapped up in a fuzzy blanket the team gave you and lit one up with him. You felt like you were a teenager in high school again, smoking before a show to ease the nerves.

Passing on local tradition.

“You’ve got any family coming tonight?” He opens his zippo lighter.

“Nah, just my friends, I don’t have family up here. You?”

“Mom and dad, they weren’t too happy I came to this school but it’s starting to grow on them” He taps his cigarette, “Anyone special coming tonight?”

“Something like that. It’s recently new with him and I, but he’ll be here.” You blow smoke,“You?”

“I just broke up with my boyfriend so probably not. We’ll see.”

“Ahh Mattias, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”

“I’m okay, just means I’ll be clubbing fucking extra tomorrow night at the afterparty, are you excited?”

“Fuck I forgot about that, I haven’t clubbed in years.”

“It’s at this hoity toity place in the Upper East Side, not The Box I promise but it’ll be fun as fuck. The directors are supposed to come, like the whole school is going to show up.”

The fucking Box. Frankie being there.

Flashbacks of Frankie fingerfucking you agasint the bathroom counter race through your mind, you couldn’t understand how bad you wanted him. The one person in your life that has changed your entire being.

You guys finish your cigarettes, small talk with him was so easy. Giggling about the shit you’ve seen in high school and college as theater majors. Mattias knew what the struggle was like, he knew the difference between stage anxiety and general anxiety. You guys were the perfect pair on stage.

“You go head on in Ms. Macbeth, get your shit done and I’ll see you soon sweet cheeks.”

-------

“So at 3 tomorrow the whole cast has an interview with The New Yorker.” Ms. Roylance announces, it’s an hour before show.

“And the main 2 have an interview with Vogue at 5.”

Vogue, what the shit.

Tech crew, all the actors and directors were in a circle, saying a couple final words before curtains would go up.

Across from you, Laylah and Bryce are holding hands and Frankie is talking to Mr Miller.

You were trying to calm your heart rate, you felt comfortable with everyone around you, but if you sit in a dark closet and rehearse for the last hour you would.

“I want us to hold hands, close our eyes and say one word we're feeling, and the last 30 minutes before show we can just roam in the back, hows that sound?” Roylace gages the group. Everyone agrees, clasping hands, shutting eyes and embracing each other's energy. It’s the best you can do.

“I’ll start, pleased.” She finishes.

“Happy.”

“Elated.”

“Horrified.”

“Worried.”

“Terrified.”

“Thrilled.” Bryce bellows.

“Overjoyed.” Laylah says.

“Light.”

“Captivated.” You immediately knew that was Frankie, his voice, the utmost bass in his voice. Shakes you alive. You open your eyes, looking at everyone around you, soaking up your last minutes with everyone before you break apart.

“Wondrous.”

“Flamboyant.”

“Flustered.”

“Scared.”

It’s your turn, you’ve had the whole circle to think about this, “Content.” Your eyes closed, the mid stage lights shining on you, the murmurs from the full crowd behind the red curtain, the smiles on all your faces, you’re ready.

“Happy.”

“Petrified.”

“Euphoric.”

The last words slip into the air, opening your eyes exasperated.

“Places in 40.” Frankie says.

Everyone separates, straggling across the stage, getting to their righteous spots but you stay. It only feels right and you know he will stay with you.

As soon as everyone is out of sight, he gets closer to you, but not daring to touch your hand. You watch him go to the middle of the curtain, he opens it slyly only to peek through to the crowd.

“Wanna come see?” He asks.

You walk downstage to him, setting in stone to his exact steps, letting one eye peek through the red fabrics and the whole crowd is lively, everyone is dressed so elegantly. The laughs, the people finding their seats. Ushers smiling. House lights dimmed sensually. This is what Broadway is about. Your jaw drops, but you wouldn’t let this dare scare your heart, you’re fucking ready for this.

“See, they are all here for you and Mattias, they are here to see the most wonderful production of the year and because of you, you bring the feisty energy they need.” He whispers into your ear. You shudder, almost tears of happiness, you had no stage fright anymore. “Now fucking blow there minds away baby.”

-------

The raven himself is hoarse, that croaks the fatal entrance of Duncan, under my battlements. Come, you spirits, that tend on mortal thoughts, unsex me here, and fill me from the crown to the toe top-full

Of direst cruelty. Make thick my blood, stop up th’ access and passage to remorse, that no compunctious visitings of nature, shake my fell purpose, nor keep peace between, th’ effect and it. Come to my woman’s breasts

And take my milk for gall, you murd’ring ministers, wherever in your sightless substances, you wait on nature’s mischief. Come, thick night, and pall thee in the dunnest smoke of hell, that my keen knife see not the wound it makes, nor heaven peep through the blanket of the dark

To cry “Hold, hold!”

Make me fucking human.

For more or less, there was no crowd in front of you. Just Mattias holding your hand. Rebirth. Refinery. Frankie watching you from the booth, admiring every step you take. Acting is simple, people pleasing is simple, it’s melodic from making up the emotions on the spot and zoning through the waves of the artistry. It’s for the people, acting is a service. You’re giving your heart out to the world.

You follow your footwork with Mattias, Macbeth and Lady Macbeth, husband and wife. Forcing your husband to follow through with your plan, killing the king. So detrimental.

You rush to the wings, dipping your newest costume with blood. Lady Macbeth is a woman of thrill and duty, she would do anything for her husband, and you know how that feels. You soak yourself with the sticky substance, getting it all over your face, fingerprints of deadly sins.

Hands so poignant with red, your heart could be falling out and no one would notice. Cue.

My hands are of your color, but I shame, to wear a heart so white, I hear a knocking

At the south entry, retire we to our chamber, a little water clears us of this deed, how easy is it, then! Your constancy, hath left you unattended, hark, more knocking, get on your nightgown, lest occasion call us, and show us to be watchers, be not lost so poorly in your thoughts.

You move the rest of the act, sit down through act 4, nothing involving you and finally act 5.

You mess around your hair, flick blood on your lips and action.

Out, damned spot, out, I say! One. Two. Why then, ‘tis time to do’t. Hell is murky. Fie, my lord, fie, a soldier and afeard? What need we fear who knows it, when none can call our power to account? Yet who would have thought the old man to have had so much blood in him?

Instantaneously you have flashbacks when you were a child. In your cold room alone, dad and mom are fighting. This always fucking happened. The yelling would make you cry, but you learned how to get over it, you accepted that was your life. But now you’re safe, now you’re with people who love you and want the best for you. Men could never have control over you, ever again.

Do you mark that?

The Thane of Fife had a wife. Where is she now? What, will these hands ne’er be clean? No more o’that, my lord, no more o’that. You mar all with this starting.

Go to, go to. You have known what you should not.

She has spoke what she should not, I am sure of that. Heaven knows what she has know.

The moment you’ve been waiting for,

Here’s the smell of blood still. All the perfumes of Arabia will not sweeten this little hand-

You don’t hold back, you dig into the crevices of your voice box, finding every follicle in your body to scream. To scare this crowd. You aren’t a little girl. Lady Macbeth is a story to never be let down. You drop to the floor, shrieking your mind away, begging for air and life. Letting the blood on you trickle with slobber and tears.

The exhaustion mixed with the heat of your scream made your head spin, but the crowd was silent- you lay there hiccuping for a minute, letting the waves of grief pass by.

What a sigh there! The heart is sorely charged.

I would not have such a heart in my bosom for the dignity of the whale body.

Well, well, well.

Pray God it be, sir.

The disease is beyond my practice. Yet I have known those which have walked in their sleep, who have died holily in their beds.

You shiver, shaking over to the edge of the stage,

To bed, to bed. There’s knocking at the gate. Come, come, come, come. Give me your hand. What’s done cannot be undone. To bed, to bed, to bed.

You exit, and the audience erupts in roars. They quickly sit back down, as there’s more dialogue with the doctor and gentlewoman, but not one moment did you hesitate to throw yourself into your monologue. It felt so powerful, unbelievably life changing.

The show finishes, sitting in the wing as your castmates finish the last monologue. Opening night was one for the books. You all line up for bows, tech right behind you, the curtain opens up and finally the moment you’ve wanted. Not the applause, but able to see Frankie in that chair, just staring at you. All you’ve wanted today is to be with him, but your performance was truly dedicated to him, he was the one that shocked your headspace, he’s the one that makes you want this all. You each take your singular bow, your feet wobbling, walking to the end, tearing up with this crowd, the graciousness you felt.

The standing ovation of the crowd was magnificent, every section clapping for minutes, no soul daring to leave their seats. New York, what a beautiful city. The strong whistles, the numerous claps, the chatter warmed your heart. Roses being sent your direction, hearts shown with hands.

Your crew was instructed to go back to your dressing rooms, clean up, hang your costumes and prepare everything the same for tomorrow, then you could go greet people if you wanted to.

Before you knew it, Mattias was dragging you out to the street, to see all the fans lining up on the street waiting to get their playbills signed.

You only wanted to find Frankie and Laylah, but you didn’t have one second to revive for yourself.

Mattias thrashes with your hand, opening the back door to the cold howling air, embraced by cheers,

“We love you guys.”

“I cried at your performance.”

“We’re coming tomorrow night”

“Lady Macbeth saved me.”

“I love you.”

Screams and shrieks were surrounding you, it’s not that you couldn’t believe it, but your heart was overpowered and overjoyed. So much in one sitting, your head turning in every which way, grabbing sharpies and scribbling your name as fast as possible.

One lady stands out, she’s quiet but vigilant, waiting for it to be her turn, and the closer you get you notice,

“Ms. Kim?” You could barely recognize her, it’s only been 4 months.

“My honey sugar, look at you!” She hugs you, tighter than a mothers hold, “Your teacher Mr.Miller gave me a shout and I booked my flight immediately, I couldn’t miss your Broadway performance.” She shakes her head.

“Ms. Kim, you didn’t have to do this, I could’ve sent you a picture, or a notecard, or a playbill.”

“Now that’s nonsense honey and you know that,” She swats your shoulder with her playbill copy, “Besides I know the whole team here, no need to worry I’m here for a week, so a coffee catch up is on your list after this weekend.”

The things that you could tell her.

“I miss you, I miss North Carolina.” You hug her again, breathing down her back, trying to not let people see your tears. She was there for you when you missed your mom, she was North Carolina in a summary, and you missed it so much.

“It’s okay sweetie, you were meant to leave that state it had nothing to offer, look at this,” She pointed at all the people, “This was your destiny.” She kisses you on the cheek, “I’ll text you for a coffee date, but go spend the night away.” She smiles.

“I love you!”

“I love you too honey.”

You leave her in the crowd, finding Mattias taking a picture with a group of girls. You tell him you’re gonna head back in to get your bag, to check your phone and possibly run into Laylah, find Frankie. Unlatching the door, the air rushing in your face, Laylah was already there with Bryce waiting for you.

“You did amazing! These flowers are for you,” They smother you, “The shock in the audience when you dropped to the floor, you stretched all of their hearts out.”

“Thank you.” You laugh, holding their hands, best friends working on Broadway together, your 16 year old selves would be thrashing down right now.

“My guys in the booth couldn’t believe they were at a college show, you and Mattias rocked it.” Bryce says.

“Thank you, that means the world. Seeing all the full seats was just fucking mind blowing and I’ll have to say that a million times to process.”

“We love you, were gonna get dinner now,” They wink, “See you tomorrow? Same time, same place?”

“Same time, same place.” You agree.

They grab your arm, pulling you close, “Get that dick tonight.”

You laugh so loud it refracts around you, we’ll see.

They leave you, content with the night. Smiling dumb because now finally you get to be with the man you’ve been itching to see.

You call him,

“Hey pretty girl, I was waiting to hear from you.”

“Sorry I was out signing playbills with Mattias. Working the night off.” You respond.

“Don’t be sorry, s’busy night for you. How d’you feel?”

“Good, Frankie, I feel amazing.” Seducing him over the phone, itching for him.

“That’s my star girl, shining so bright on that stage.” He smiles in the phone, you can feel it.

“Where are you right now?” You ask.

“In my car, just watching the sky.”

“And where would that be?”

“Behind the theater and the crowd, come find me princess.”

“Ok Playboy, I’ll see you in a second.”

You end the call, chucking your bag behind your back. You slowly walk to the door, finally entering a world you can’t step back out of. Reminiscing when you had no idea what the fuck you two were.

You sprawl out, no one would be here at this time of night. He’s smoking a cigarette, convertible top down. Collar open and his hat is off, puffed locks chasing every direction. He looks up to you.

“Frankie, an Ashton Martin Convertible?”

“Yeah.”

You stare at him, some fucking longer. “I don’t know, just an Ashton Martin roaming the streets, a really nice car I’ve only heard in books.”

“Would you feel better if you knew I saved a couple paychecks for this.” He raises his eyebrows.

“Sure.” So he had money, money. Double shit.

You get in and he stares at you, flickering between your lips and eyes. You could jump him now, but you had to wait. You liked the game.

“Food, bar, coffee, books, my house? What’s your wish tonight?” He holds your hand.

“Hmmm your house remember? Wouldn’t pass that up for a lifetime.” You remark.

He nods, setting the car in gear. You flicker your hands to his cigarette, he lets you take it and the drag of his menthol cigs felt smooth on your throat. Menthol and Frankie just make sense.

He’s playing Pink Floyd, blasting it through the dark streets of the city, and all you can do is smile stupidly. Your hair flying everywhere, hands perpetually finding the power of the wind, eyes closed.

You feel his hand sneak to your thigh, creeping to your body. Speaking to you through your mind. If his hand could do that now, what else would happen tonight? He moves further and further up your leg, eyes shooting open at him.

“What?” He turns to you, stopped at a light.

You grind your teeth, his hand was big enough to almost cover your whole thigh.

“You say something?” He smirks.

You wince as his hand lays on your skin, never moving but lingering so close where you crave his fingers.

A guitar ripple catches your attention from the speakers, he’s strumming to the beat on your thigh, and you can’t move.

“And we’re here darlin, what do you think?”

He parks in front of a modern brownstone, pillars glossing the entrance like a greek house. Bigger brownstone than usual. Everything about him makes sense, the expensive taste made sense, but this house was beautiful.

You take a breath, “It’s beautiful, Frankie. I couldn’t imagine anything different.” You’re scared to get out, but you itch to find what’s inside. He closes the top to the car, running around to open your door.

“Cmon pretty girl, don’t be shy.” He holds your hand out, he walks behind you up the stairs, punching in a code you looked away for.

“3570, didn’t need to look away baby, that codes yours.” He whispers to you, walking into his house.

Your first steps are met with roses, sprawled on the outskirts of the floor. His first floor, open for the world to see. Piles of roses, rose petals begging for your touch, he grabs your hips pulling you to him. “This is all for you.” You stand there with him, holding you. No man has ever gone this far to express something for you.

Grand piano deep into the room, kitchen with a marble island, champagne with two glasses full for you both, one staircase with golden spiraling leading to the top on the side. White columns and archways holding the house.

“And one person lives here?” You poke.

“Yes, but I quite enjoy it,” He lugs you closer to the kitchen to set your stuff down, “This is the house I dreamed of as a boy.”

“Well, it’s beautiful. I’ve never seen anything like this.” You ponder around like a child lost at Disney.

The back archway was all glass, you could see a light on outside to his backyard. His dining table to the wall of glass, next to the greenery. He had a conversational pit as his couch, dark green leather with faux fur overthrows. His TV was massive, and next to it were beautiful oil paintings.

He had shelves as a wall, lined with books and vinyls. Years of purchasing and collecting.

You take a peak, letting your hands run across the dusty spines.

“The Chakachas, João Gilberto…hmm Gerry Rafferty” You laugh, “Your music taste…is sexy Francisco.” He’s watching your every move.

“What can I say, I’m a cultured man.” He smugs a smile. He’s behind you, raining his fingers around your waist, you take Jungle Fever out of its sleeve, placing it on his record player.

“Just to set the mood don’t you think?” You snicker, “Have you seen Boogie Nights? You do look like a young Burt Renolds, scary kinda.”

“I get that sometimes, you like that darlin? Like broad-“ Kiss, “Hairy men?”

You dance with him to the music, listening to the women's moans of the song. Letting the dim lights glisten around his living room.

Moaning in his ear, grinding against him. Melting into his body.

“I love it.” You purr, “He was so sexy, don’t you think? That playboy pose he did made everyone in the seventies go crazy. I’d let him fuck me on spot if I was alive back then-”

He laughs, “Hmp, you wanna get fucked?” His head turns to the side, mouth curving open, with his eyebrows falling inward.

Your mouth falls, drooling over his voice. You hold onto his hair, sheething his body into yours, “Fuck me tonight Frankie, fuck me hard.” You whisper.

A lion raptures through his physicality, lifting you up to the closest thing, the Grand Piano.

“Frankie, we can't do anything here, I’ll break it!”

“I don’t care princesa, I don’t care, I’ll eat you out for hours and it could break, I��ll pay for another one.” He growls, “I need to taste this pussy now.” He set you down, looking you in the eyes as a rabid beast. His eyes were blown black, glaring at you for more.

He pulls your shorts down leaving you in just your shirt, your bottom half bare in front of him. “Mmh, no panties,” He chuckles, “What brought you to do this miel?”

“I figured there's no point, you’d rip them off anyway.” You shrug, head slating on the lid of the piano. Goosebumps rising on your body, the cold of the instrument touching your ass, air meeting the gloss of your entrance.

“Perfect fucking pussy, perfect fucking body. My girls so fucking perfect.” He spreads kisses down to your stomach, leaning when he reaches your mound. You grimace, you haven’t shaved in a long time.

“It’s okay baby, see?” He presses his hand on top of your sex, “Hair doesn’t change a thing how I feel about you. Hair doesn’t change a thing about how I want to fuck your brains out, okay?.” He kisses on top of your bush, shivering when you feel the wet of his lips with his mustache, nose bracing your clit. “I’m the only one that gets to touch your pussy like this, understand?”

You shake your head yes, “Only you can touch me.”

“Look at me, look at me while I destory your fuckin pussy.” He pushes your legs closer to him, eye level with your pussy. You wouldn't believe you’ve gone hours without this, without his tongue. He adamantly drives into your cunt, moaning as he shoves his tongue inside you.

He moans, the usual vibrations of his mouth floating through your lower abdomen. Cells inside your pussy sensationally fucked up from his mouth.

The tip of his nose would rub against your clit, he always managed to do it, but this time he was moving his face. His nose was creating circles against your nub, tongue squeezing the life out of you.

“Frankie- ngh- baby- feels so good- keep going-” You plead. Instead of grabbing his hair, you wrapped your hands around the edges of the piano, keeping your body from contorting due to the immense pleasure.

Your request followed through, he kept circling, shaking his head between your thighs. He would never let up, swallowing everything your cunt had for him.

“Pussy on my tongue, so tight. Pussy walls are quiverin for me baby.” He groans, dancing his hands to your stomach, legs dangling over his shoulders.

“Hold onto my hands dirty girl, I know you’re strong, cum in mouth.”

He raffles inside you more, squeezing his hands so your body doesn’t escape from his touch. Your clit suddenly buzzes, repeatedly shaking. Your walls come crashing on his tongue, he doesn’t stop pushing into you.

You scream for help, violently shaking against his hold. You couldn’t control your voice, begging for more. You can’t do anything other than yell because the movement form his tongue

“I’m gonna cum Frankie, I’m gonna cum on your tongue-” You cry.

“Give it to me, drip into my mouth.” His sinister base flows through your pussy, the room spins and you shriek against the piano. He sucks you clean from your orgasm, releasing his hold from you.

“Breathe baby, breathe.” The fuzziness of the lights die down, and his face comes in contact again.

“Your tongue- is fucking magical.” You drunkenly smile, “But I want more tonight. Please.” He pulls you off the piano, leaving a sweat mark on the top. You plant your feet to the ground, he holds your body up.

He chuckles, “Tell me what you want mi amour, what is it that you want?” He taunts.

“Fuck you, you know what I want.” You seethe.

“Ok,” He nods his head, “If you think I know, then fuck yourself for me. Go down to the couch, take your shirt off, and fuck yourself with your fingers.”

He had your full attention and you feel small, you’ve never done anything like this in front of a man.

“Go on princess, I’ll be right here.”

You faintly walk to his couch, slipping past the steps. You sit down at the edge of the couch, taking your shirt and shifting your bra off your chest. You’re completely naked in front of him, nipples begging for his touch.

“Play with yourself for me, pretty girl.”

You snake your hands down to your entrance, fiddling with your slick. You touch your clit, but it feels nothing like his hands.

“Frankie please, I need your cock.” You whine.

“You should’ve just said that, now look at you, yeah?” He walks to the steps, sitting down, “I need to you to cum on your fingers before I fuck you, I wanna see it.”

You hum, discoing your fingers on your clit, you imagine his cock finally slipping inside of you. What you’ve wanted since you’ve laid eyes on him.

“Push those fingers inside, think of my cock dirty girl.” He growls, looking you up and down.

You plunge your fingers inside, moving your hips against your hand. Wishing to have his thick cock inside you.

“Frankie, I’ll be so good, please. I want you inside me. I want you holding me down, I wanna be filled with you.” You mumble, terrorizing your hand.

“Wanna be a good girl for me? Fuckin tie you down, fuck you until soak me.” You shovel your fingers inside your cunt faster, imagining yourself restrained against his bed. His cock pushing into you at an unforgivable speed. “You’d like that huh dirty fuckin girl. Not able to move while I fuck your cunt, fillin you up til you feel it in your stomach.”

You slant your eyes open,” I want you to tie me up one night Frankie, be your-fucking rope bunny. Want you to use my pussy.”

“I wanna do everything with you, dirty girl, so perfect.”

You feel yourself tightening around your hand, his words making you interclose on your hand.

You would never be able to make yourself cum this fast because of your fingers, but because of him, because of his coaxing words, your own orgasm felt stronger.

“I can it hear baby, I see you leakin, cum for me, let go. Then I’ll give you my cock for as long as you want. Shove those fingers in for me.” He purrs.

You fall back on his couch, wavering your body to your orgasm. You gave a final push, laying stagnant from your orgasm. You watch him stroll to you from his steps.

He’s hungry.

“So gorgeous, so wet for me.” He smirks, “Now what do you want, so perfect and plump for me.”

“I want your fucking cock, I need you inside me Frankie.” You tremble.

He licks his lips, sitting down on the couch, “Don’t wanna do anything you’re not comfortable with pretty girl,” He moves your hair behind your ears, “Is this how you want me? Let me get a condom.”

You push him down, you should use a condom but you couldn’t be less botherd, “You could’ve fucked me in that bathroom and I would’ve cared less Frankie, fucking on this couch will be more than heaven,” And it is, “Don’t worry about a condom, I need to feel you bare.” He goes to object, but you shove your fingers to close his mouth.

Your eyes linger on his cock, he’s already swelling, “I wanna do everything with you Frankie, you could never make me uncomfortable.”

You close in to the crook of his neck, kissing him everywhere, praising him for making you feel so good, “I need you to fuck my brains out, make it hurt Frankie.”

Without blinking, he lifts you to his lap, placing your naked pussy on him. He kisses you sloppily on the lips, holding you close so you don’t fall, he growls possessing more of you.

“My beautiful girl, I’ve been waitin for this to happen, been dreamin of you sitting on my cock. I’m so glad we’ve waited, it’s gonna feel so good baby.”

You rub against him, letting your liquid leak all over him.

“I’ve been so good Frankie, I’ve been trying so hard not to think about your cock, when you were down my throat all I wanted was to be full of you everywhere.” And now-” You shimmy his shirt off, kissing his collar bones, rushing to his belt.

He flings it off slamming it to the ground, you look past it as it impacts the floor, making a hard whipping sound.

“Bet you’d like that naughty girl, fucking whip until you’re red. Tie you up with my belt.” You squirm against him, humping his bulge.

Images of Frankie whipping your ass with his belt, slapping your pussy, makes your brain short circuit.

He pulls his pants down with his boxers, flinging his cock out. You don’t remember it being this big. He was uncut and at least 8 inches. How could he fit inside you? The sight already making your pussy leak.

You rush your hands to his head, dangling your legs on his lap, pussy out for the world to see. You pull his foreskin back letting his precum bead down to your fingers.

“Feel s’good baby, fingers feel so good wrapped around my cock.” He grimaces.

You pump his dick, letting him grow against you, he keeps getting bigger and bigger. His tip was so pink, you wanted to suck him off like a lollipop. You wanted his dick down your throat. Embellishing in every way he can fill you up.

You lick his precum off your fingers, and he shoves his thumb in your mouth, “Suck.” He demands.

You enclose, treating his thumb like his cock. Swirling, letting every part of your saliva coat it.

He parts from you, soon attaching it to your pussy to moisten you up. He was going to stretch you so wide.

“Tell me if it hurts baby, please, I don’t want you to hurt.” He requests.

“I don’t care if it hurts Frankie, I need you to push me open. I need your cock.”

You shift until your lips are hovering over the head of his dick, waiting for him to pump into you. The tension was so thick you could barely breathe.

He carnally anchors into you, his cock magnetizing inside your cunt, the moment he surges into you, holding onto his shoulders stronger, you both gasp from feeling each other for the first time.

“Holy fuck, princesa you’re so tight.” He braces.

You try to move up from him but he attaches his hands to your hips and pushes you up and down. The air is eccentric and you’re so grateful you get to be so close to him, clasping on to his figure as he fucks into you.

He nips at your collar bone, lazily kissing you. Your hair disheveled from your body shaking.

“I love your cock, I love your cock. Oh my god- FuFuFuFuck.” You chant in his ear. The simplicity of having sex made you feel safe, this was more than magical. He was almost fucking your heart. He was so deep inside you, your mound was connecting to his base.

You loved when he was so dominant with you, you loved when he was in control, you loved Frankie.

“Fuck me- as hard as- you can. Use- my pussy.” You yelp.

The more you felt your pussy lips gripping onto his cock, the more you seized. The connection was beyond powerful. He aggressively slips into you, his tip touching that perfect spongy wall that would make you lose all will power.

“God darlin, love watchin those eyes roll back. Didn’t know you’d get this cock drunk baby. You love my cock so much?” He rasps.

“Spank me, please, slap my ass and fucking mark me.” You whine.

He lifts his hand, slapping your ass. He grabs onto your love handles, pulling you onto his dick harder.

“You like that? When my handprints on your ass? You want more?” He grunts.

You shake your head, and he continues, the sting firing your pussy up. His animalistic movements make you worship his soul, he matched your sex energy and you couldn’t be more thankful. You relished this moment, so grateful for Frankie.

He lusted over your tits, he slowed to kiss them, suck your nipples to hardened peaks. Somehow your heart hammered, watching him take care of every need your body craved, made you pussy twitch with his cock inside you. Watching his mouth wrap about your tits intensified your lust for him.

“I want you to do something for me,” He releases, “I want you to spell my name.”

“How-”

“Move your hips, move your hips with my cock still inside, ride me.” He stirs.

He intertwined his hands with yours, you back up from his chest preparing. He doesn’t lose your eyes for one second.

“F” You shake, his dick is everywhere inside your walls.

“R” You whine, the contact so slow and vivid, you could almost hear the colors off the walls.

“Keep going, that's it, just use that dick.” He coaxes.

“A” The tip of the A making his cock arch into you deeper than you could have ever imagined, you yell, soliciting for neighbors to hear.

“N”

“K” The ache in your pussy crying to cum, but you weren’t done. You knew you had to finish.

“I”

“E” You whimper, not able to sit straight any longer.

“Such a good girl, knew you could do it. My good fucking girl.” He kisses you, “I know what that pussy wants, I know she needs to cum. Wanna cum pretty girl?”

“Mhm, please Frankie. I-I was so good. I wanna cum on your cock. I’ll do anything, I’ll be so so good.” You plead.

His cock was intoxicating your brain, oxytocin so high you couldn’t think about where you were, only that Frankie was all you cared about in your life right now.

He aggressively hurls into you again, pinning your hands behind your back as he holds them in place. You couldn’t do anything but take his cock, you had to accept that he was gonna fuck you til you saw stars.

“You can do it baby, pussy’s already leakin all over me and the floor. She’s clamping around me. I wanna see that pretty face when you cum.” He finalized.

“Fran-Frankie keep going, I’m gonna cum I’m gonna cum,” You praise.

You couldn’t even process his words, half-lidded and half dazed, all you could focus on was your pussy devouring his cock. Him driving past you until you couldn’t hear. The power to force you knew your voice was giving out. You couldn’t touch him, but him holding your hands back made you grateful, your orgasm so powerful you felt as if you were gonna break his cock.

Your voice box cracks, you immediately fall against his chest, stagnant from movement with the only action you could do was breathe.

He lays there will you, wrestling his heart from fucking you so fast. You couldn’t open your heart, let alone walk.

He picks you up, he leaves his couch area and you sense he’s taking you upstairs. He saunters into a dark room, placing you on top of his duvet cover keeping the lights off. You couldn’t tell what his room looked like, but you felt like a vegetable. He came back to you, cleaning your entrance with a baby soft towel. He has to move your legs, you were unresponsive with the widest smile on your face, eyes slanted to only see that he was getting in bed with you.

He lifts the cover, tucking you in next to him. You snuggle against his chest, embracing your body heat, spooning into him. Your breathing falters, in sync with his.

He rubs his hands through your hair, making you fall asleep faster.

“I love you, mi amor.”

And that's the last thing you remember before sleeping off the best night of your life.

—

i love lady macbeth soooo much. looking into the meaning of her monologues are so powerful and she changed my thoughts on shakespeare 🔁🔁

previous || next

taglist: @pastelnap

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alaynestcnes · 28 days

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how do you think the series is going to end? obviously jonsa ;) but do you think it'll be similar to the show?

I go backwards and forwards tbh. I do feel like where most of the characters ended up in the show is probably a good indicator for their book ending (I think D&D got told the broad strokes of GRRMs ending but they just got too turned around w what they wanted/thought would make good TV).

More under the cut bc I rambled on for longer than I thought I would 😵‍💫

I do think Jonsa will be canon in some capacity and to me there’s only really two realistic routes;

1. Tragic star-crossed lovers who are tortured by their forbidden feelings (a la the original outline). Honestly if it goes this way I can see their romance being a subplot that isn’t entirely focussed on tbh. GRRM is a romantic but it’s usually subtle - look at Ned/Cat, Jaimie/Brienne. Even with Robb/Jeyne, it was bare bones. These are definitely love stories, but the love is so truthfully woven into the workings of the narrative that it’s barely a plot point itself. Jon and Sansa will have the same, where it’s there and unspoken and painful and probably motivates some of their decisions, but it’s not some epic Romeo and Juliet thing that consumes them. If they do have this plot where they have feelings, I doubt they’ll end up together (I don’t think we can have both). It’ll probably end like the show with everything unspoken/unresolved with Jon exiled or dead and Sansa on the throne.

2. Ned/Cat 2.0 political marriage. I generally lean more in this direction. Jon and Sansa are both political characters and their plots/desires are leading them to Winterfell. They are both positioned to be leaders of the North - it makes sense that it would be together. I think there will be Northern conspiracies that will lead to a politically fractured North with the various Starks becoming figureheads for the different remaining houses vying for power (Manderly wanting Rickon on the Northern throne, Petyr/the Vale wanting Sansa, and miscellaneous others wanting the newly resurrected Jon). Rickon will probably die (I hate it but I can’t see another way for him 😭), his followers split between Jon and Sansa’s camps. Targ reveal will happen, which will lessen Jon’s claim. But he’s a god-like figure after his resurrection so he’ll still have followers and he’ll know he needs the power of the entire united North to fight the WW. Makes sense that some advisors would suggest a marriage instead of tearing the North apart, especially with Jon wanting to go off to face the WW threat immediately. Sansa will want peace and she’ll see sense in marrying a man she knows (who I’m sure LF (if he’s alive atp) will imply that Jon will accidentally die in the war anyway and leave it all to Sansa). So they get married to unite the North, despite being essentially strangers atp. As above, I don’t think we’ll get much of an actual love story, but they are suited to each other and I think by the end of the series we’ll come very full circle with Ned/Cat ‘love didn’t just happen, we built it’. And ofc with the final book being A Dream of Spring (i.e rebirth, new life, hope) I’m betting on a Stark baby.

Idk about the other characters ngl I don’t spend half as much time theorising on them 🙃

Jon will likely seek out Dany to face the WWs. I think it’ll be pretty similar to the show where she’ll be split between wanting to help and wanting to take KL. Maybe a bit of the politcal!Jon theory here to convince her (we do need that betrayal for love, which I 100% believe is Jon - maybe with him knowing the war/their plan will likely be her doom but he goes through with it to protect the North). Ultimately, I think she’ll die fighting the WWs in like an epic sacrifice. BUT while she dies, at least one of her dragons will survive. Which means that while Dany saved the world, she also doomed them to another terrible fate - having a grown, enraged, untamed dragon loose upon the world with the only woman able to control them gone. So, even though the WW will be defeated, in the remaining/following book there’s still a Big Bad to cause drama. I like the idea of Dany’s end being conflicting - she dies a true hero but also her great act is her worst act and has long lasting consequences for the survivors.

Cersei will probably try to capture Drogon in her greed for power and in doing so causes KL to burn (Drogon’s fire + all that hidden wildfire). This is actually based on nothing but vibes haha but I like her end being caused by her own hand and greed, reaching for more when she could have lived with the power she already had. I’m choosing to ignore the Valonquar bc idc I’m not GRRM.

Bran King of Westeros bc why not.

Arya’s ending has me lost. I think she def meets Lady Stoneheart and it will make her question her own pursuit for revenge. I don’t think Arya’s story is meant to end with her becoming a heartless professional assassin dedicating her life to killing the enemies of her family; she is so much more than that. Seeing LSH will make her witness the horror of being entirely consumed by hate and bloodshed. She’ll kill LSH out of mercy and it will also symbolise her putting to rest her own anger and desire for revenge. Idk where she’ll finally end up tho so she gets a wildcard and can do whatever she wants.

Andddd all of this is subject to change on any given day. I’m just rocking w whatever feels right atp bc god knows we’re never seeing Winds.

#me: this is my well thought out rational ideas for the ending!#me: writes a fanfic based on nothing but vibes #junk

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stylesharrys · 2 months

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Re: ATYA

How can you say IF he ever tells her that they didn’t do anything the night of their wedding 😤😤 you are such a tease. He HAS to tell her at some point… right?:( this is a love story and she deserves to know—Harry has a conscience!

If you can’t tell I am obsessed. About to subscribe to your patreon to get the second part 😮‍💨

I really can’t wait to see him get a little more flirty and smiley, to fluster her a bit and bask in having an effect on her; and for her to start feeling those giddy feelings of crushing on him—feeling wanted and adored. Or at least, I hope there’s some fluff coming? 🥺 I love the moments he’s biting back a smile or laugh because she amuses him. More please, I’ll be good I promise.

I’m SLIGHTLY aroused at the idea of his “coronation” and the power he’s going to be emanating. Like. I know I’m not supposed to be turned on by when he’s musing about torturing the composure out of her, but the power play and him being such a good man, knowing full well he’d never hurt her, is really such a tantalizing balance. A threat that would never come to fruition. Fear play at its fucking finest. 😵‍💫 are you even AWARE how brilliant you are?

Are there any kinks to come in this? Or we sticking with some classic vanilla? No shame to either, your writing is brilliant and passionate as it is. Just curious… asking for a friend…

Side note, this story has such a slow burn and I can’t tell if I hate it or love it HAHAHA. Normally I love it but while reading part one I kept getting interrupted by family and it was making me so frustrated and antsy, like NO ITS ALREADY A SLOW BURN AND NOW IM BEING FORCED TO PAUSE MULTIPLE TIMES AND BE IN REALITY FOR A SECOND? Torture. So rude. Gonna have to seclude myself going forward or I’m going to snap at someone HJJFUFH

This fic is FIRE and I haven’t been this agitated for a next part since I can’t remember when. Test of my patience. LOL.

Can I use an emoji to communicate with you? I don’t expect this will be the last time I’ll want to gush to you but I also don’t want to bother you. Please feel free to be honest xx (also sorry this was so long)

- is 🍯 taken?

I am officially IN LOVE with you 🥹😘 the feedback you give is every writers wet dream HAHAHA!! I’m so fucking glad you’re enjoying the series and thank you for thinking of becoming a patron 🥹🫶🏻

As for your question on kinks, it’s sooo tricky because Y/N is a delicate little flower and the things Harry’s into would quite literally make her run for the hills LMAO!! So for smut it’s fairly tame, but a lootttt of dirty talk and praise from Harry will be seen!!

I don’t think anyone’s really ready for the things that happen in parts 2 & 3. I’ve had part 3 planned for years but never wrote it and I was looking back out the outlines and I was like oh shit it goes OFF hahahahah part 2 isn’t as chaotic as part 3. Girlie part 3 will be a WHIRLWIND of emotions. I can’t wait to finish writing it!!

AND ABSOLUTELY YOU CAN USE AN EMOJI! 🍯 is officially yours!! 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

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here2bbtstrash · 1 year

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LDMOLT 9

• goddayummmm she did not just had a wet dream in the plane 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

• ‘I’m happy to get a translator??????’ THE AUDACITY OF THAT BITCH not that i’m complaining if this gets her and yoongi in the same bed but still! racism of all goddddd

• ahahahaha bringing astrology in here is SO YOUUUU

• whoa whoa whoa did we just admit we have a voice kink!!! PROGRESSS

• “Okay I’m ready to go win a Grammmy now!!” he is so fucking cute 😭 what happened to my PROD asshole

• did that just happen!!! i mean i was expecting it but not like this or so soon! looks like we are way too used to them just orbiting around each other

• well fuck! i’m well FUCK!

the karaoke was so cute and i’m so glad they’re finally off the edge and are having fun like they should! because they deserve it so much!!

Mochi is as usual relentless! you kept saying it’s long but honestly it didn’t feel like it because it’s so smooth! the only thing i think that’s remaining now is their talk in the morning!

the explanation as to why the reader is so edgy about having any kind of relationship with co workers also came up! but well this has already been way past controlling anything!

my fav bunnies are finally fucking like two human beings obsessed with each other telling each other what they want exactly!

i’m so so so happy to see the progression as far! I wonder though if yoongi will remember this in the morning!

we are also sleeping in the same bed and cuddling 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 god you dummies!

this was so hot and fluffy at the same time! and this series is way too close to my heart

thank you for delivering as usual! i hope you’re resting and taking care of yourself

love ❤️

Thank you for writing:)

AHHHHH LET'S GET INTO IT 🤪

skdjhfsfd the airplane dream can you believe 💀 let's just hope she wasn't talking in her sleep 💀💀💀 and listen we all know how i feel about realism so i was like let's throw in the realest thing of all: ✨american racism✨

LET THE RECORD SHOW IT TOOK ME NINE CHAPTERS TO GET TO AN ASTROLOGY MENTION lmaooooo i mean did we already decide months ago that reader is a taurus, yes, but,

can you believe they're actually COMMUNICATING (kind of) and TOLERATING EACH OTHER (mostly) and ADMITTING FEELINGS (okay that one's just yoongi right now 💀) like who even are these two

i really really loved writing the ktown scene, these two needed to have a fun night together and i've been DYING to write them as drinking partners (you know, in circumstances where they aren't talking about dead parents and almost attempting suicide sdjkflsfd)

ahhhh it means the world that this didn't feel long to you 🥺 16k felt a little ridiculous to me but my heart really wanted this whole weekend to be one chunk, like just reader and yoongi in their lil bubble 🫧💜 i'm so glad the pace still felt easy to read!!

and yesssss 🫠 we got some more insight into her last relationship and her trust issues lmao !! when you've been burned once your brain can freak out about what feels like repeating the pattern, part of why she's been struggling so much with all of this!

we're gonna have to see what happens in the morning 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

thank youuuuu so much love!!! to hear that this series has had an impact on you means everything bc i love these two sooooo so much 😩 and i'm so glad you're enjoying, thank you for reading!! 💜

#anonymous #mbox 📮#fic review #look down on me like that #LDOMLT spoilers #queue what you want ㄱ -ㅅ-ㄱ

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jiminrings · 2 years

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I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS DROPPING TODAYYYYY i cried when jungkook cried …… I felt…. Bad….. 😵‍💫 the jungkook im reading right now compared to the jungkook i read when it was just kind of their backstory and how simply he loves is so different 😭😭 is it different because of the circumstances? or is it the same we’re just seeing him under a microscope ? both maybe ? also i did end up doing the breathing everytime i read it it does absolutely calm me down even when i was crying because jungkook was crying 🙏 SORA WAS HAPPY IM SO HAPPY SHE WAS HAPPY AND NOT LIKE SUPER ANNOYING ABT IT 😭😭🙌🙌 their little talk when oc went to get her ring and her other things was so lovely to see and honestly i think u r so talented in the way that u can make ur readers hate a character one second and be in love with them the next because that’s truly what’s happening with jungkook i can’t not love him when he was making homemade meals man my jaw dropped when i read that ☹️☹️☹️☹️ also don’t know why but jimin being like kind of best buddies with jungkook for a split second ( not rlly ) made me love him so much i think his character is so cute 🌟🌟 finding out yoongi was actually gonna go through with it was such a shock especially a day after jungkook was gonna was SOOOOOO like omg idk i didn’t expect him to ever think of going through with it i thought he was only ever gonna love her from afar. AND OMG WHEN HE SAID GOOD WORK I THOUGHT HM WHAT IF IT WAS EUNWOO LOL AS IN LOL THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN HANNAH I CANT BELIEVE U that was so crazy i can’t wait to see if jungkook ever finds out if sora’s gonna get involved and stuff god i love drama 🙏 when jungkook was sobbing about the article THATS when i cried i didn’t even realize i was crying til i couldn’t read bc my eyes were so watery i caught myself making my eyes rlly big 😭 the shop scene was rlly such a nice ending to this chapter because seeing them together even if it was partially (because i know they miss each other especially jungkook when he kissed her cheek) pretend for her parents it still made me feel so nice and warm and it felt so normal for a second 🌟 i wonder if jungkook and her r ever gonna talk abt the yoongi thing as in yoongis almost confession and the dating scandal all of it im so scared but excited ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 i rlly do love this series with all of my heart and i wish my asks could be more organized maybe i will start doing bullet points bc it’s honestly hard for Me to read back but thank u so much for writing and sharing it with us !!!! - 🌟

very sorry for making u Feel Bad but ur right ur right the jungkook of chapter 2 is lightyears away from the jungkook of chapter one!!! u also did the breathing exercises omg stop i will kiss u on ur cerebrum 💔💔 this is a wildcard opinion idk everyone will agree on but speaking for the next update, i think sora will be lovable !!!!! thank u thank u for the kind words ur one of my favorites omg i try to spot u everytime whenever i post fics :(( i will always try to fit the bff jimin agenda wherever until the day i die <3 u could imagine that jungkook was just FLOORED knowing that yoongi was so close to becoming oc’s :// that scene is a collective heartbreaker seeing all the asks regarding it </3 the shop scene made my heart n pussae jump a tiny little bc look at them!!! kissing each other’s cheeks wow!!!!! we will see what they r gonna do abt the yoongi situation in chapter 3 😼😼 i love ur asks whether organized or unorganized THANK YEWWWWW FOR BEING HERE

#answered #mass answered #478 feed #love mail

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monicasdanvers · 2 years

Text

will never be over this ???? i need context!! like when was it taken ?? who asked for it ? who took it ?? did all of them get a copy ???

#hc that cody didn’t want to be in the photo and fives & echo just pleaded with him and he gave in within a minute because he’s a sucker #and he adores them lol #commander cody #captain rex #arc trooper echo #arc trooper fives #cc 2224 #ct 7567 #ct 5555 #ct 1409 #the clone wars #cody looks at this photo when he’s sad guys #we didn’t see it in the series but i know it happens 😵‍💫

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nctinthehouse · 2 years

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12-1PM

PAIRING: fem-grad-student!reader x idol bf!Yuta

GENRE: fluff, slight angst, established relationship!au

WC: 1.7k

⚠️ WARNING(S): blood, open wound, stitches, language

A/N: Just a small reminder & disclaimer to say this is all fictional, am no medical expert nor have I gotten stitches before! 😵‍💫 Also, quick shout out to anon for giving me ideas for this series!!

SERIES MASTERLIST ♡ MAIN MASTERLIST

20.FEB.2022

—

"Show me your arm, Y/N."

You shake your head and look down at the ground, avoiding your boyfriend's eyes.

"Please, Y/N…" Yuta pleaded to you, taking out some tissue to wipe off the blood on his hand.

You had your arm hidden behind your back from Yuta. You bite your lower lip as you start to feel nervous and anxious, knowing that you'll be confronted by your boyfriend on why on earth there was blood on his hand. It was time to tell him the truth now.

What exactly caused it? Why didn't you tell him something was wrong?

‎

Bringing your arm out, you notice red blotches on your sleeve. Your eyes widen as you realise how serious this could be and how there's a chance you'll need to go to the hospital. But you didn't want to.

Gradually, you roll up your sleeve to show Yuta. You glance at your arm and squirm a little when you see a bit of blood.

"Stitches…? Yuta couldn't believe what he was seeing.

You can see Yuta panicking through his eyes shifted, and his eyebrows scrunched up. You knew he was panicking, but at the same time, he was irritated. And you knew exactly why.

You look everywhere but at Yuta, not wanting to look at him as you begin to tug your sleeve down, but Yuta stops you, placing his hand over yours. He takes more tissues from his pocket and layers them over the opened wound.

“Since when did you get stitches? How come I don’t know about this?” Yuta asks alarmingly.

“It’s nothing. I’m fine.”

You were very adamant about how you were okay, that those stitches weren’t anything serious. You didn’t want to make a big deal out of it, nor did you want Yuta to make a big fuss from it, so you tried to brush it under the rug.

"Y/N, stop lying to me. How did this even happen?!"

You sigh. "I already told you, it's nothing." You slowly roll your sleeve down.

"It can't be nothing if it meant having to get stitches Y/N."

You can tell by the tone of your boyfriend's voice that he was not happy about you dismissing something serious. You sigh again but don't say anything, pressing your lips together into a thin line. You didn't want to look Yuta in the eyes; you knew that he was disappointed in you for not telling him about this, but you had reasons.

"Why didn't you tell me?!"

Yuta raised his voice slightly and kept his gaze on you, trying to make out what was on your mind currently. He didn’t mean to do that, but after all, you’re his girlfriend, and he had every right to be annoyed and panicked at you for lying to him and keeping this injury a secret from him. He loves you and cares about you so much. He never wants anything bad to happen to you. He never wants to lose you.

You finally turned to make eye contact with him but quickly looked at the ground and hesitated. Though you didn’t want to tell him, you knew you needed to. But before you could begin to explain yourself, Yuta cuts you off.

“You know what, that’s not important right now. We need to go to the hospital.”

You shake your head. “No, it’s fine. I can just bandage it up; it’s not a big deal.”

“Not a big deal?? Y/N….” Yuta gently holds onto your sleeve. “This is blood. Your stitches are open. That’s dangerous, and it can get infected.”

As much as you hate hospitals and didn’t want to go, you knew Yuta was right and for the best.

You don’t oppose or refuse; instead, you nod your head lightly. “Okay…” you softly speak out.

Luckily, Yuta spots an empty taxi approaching where you guys were and gestures for it to stop so you both can head to the nearby hospital in no time.

Around 40 minutes later, you and Yuta come out of the hospital.

It was faster than you expected. Since the hospital was nearby and there was barely any traffic, it didn't take long for you to get there. Your doctor has already treated you and booked you for a checkup in about two weeks.

It's quiet between you and Yuta as both of you are walking at a slow pace outside the building, but it's not long before Yuta breaks the silence.

“So… Why didn’t you tell me?”

You press your lips together and turn to look at him, feeling guilty. “I just… didn’t want you to worry about me because you were so busy with your schedules… I knew you were stressed out and… I didn’t want to add on to that stress….”

Yuta halts his steps, stands in front of you, and takes your hands in his.

“Baby, you know I’m always going to worry about you, whether I have schedules or not. Especially during this time of year, now that you’re close to graduating. I know how pressured you’ve been feeling lately with everything, but you do know that it’s okay to tell me your problems or if you want to let anything out. After all, I am your boyfriend, and I promise you will never add to my stress; you never have. If anything, you’re the one that gets rid of it all.”

“I know… I’m sorry…” you look at your boyfriend apologetically.

Yuta gives you an understanding smile. “Are you going to tell me how you got those in the first place?” Yuta asks as he glances down at your arm and then looks back at you.

You throw your head back and whine, looking at the ground. “It’s kinda stupid. It’ll probably be one of the silliest things you’ll hear…” you grumble.

Yuta soothes the back of your hands with his thumbs. “It’s okay, baby, just tell me.”

You let out a big sigh, “Okay… so, basically…” pausing before making eye contact with Yuta. He nods his head at you, signalling you to continue.

“Just a little over a week ago, I was coming out of class, and there was a small crowd a few feet away in the hallway. Turns out there was an argument or something? There were a few pushes here and there, but it didn’t look out of control or anything... I really needed to be somewhere, and I thought I would just quickly pass through this small space they had since some other students passed through that way. So… I quickly followed behind one of my classmates, but then somehow, the fight escalated further, and I accidentally got shoved to the side against the wall….”

You take your hands from his and continue to explain to Yuta, showing him with hand gestures. Something you always did out of habit whenever you had to explain or clarify things in detail.

“So…basically, where I got shoved, there’s a cabinet thingy in the wall, where they keep fire extinguishers. Obviously, it’s usually blocked off, but… some of the glass was broken… Not sure how… most likely because of the fight? But anyway… the broken glass and the sharp tag thingy they had on the extinguisher scraped my arm…. I didn’t know the cabinet was broken and it was so sharp; sharp enough to cause this….” You pointed to the arm where your stitches were.

“Thankfully, it wasn’t my entire arm; otherwise, that definitely would’ve been a LOT worse… and I know, I should’ve just turned back and stayed inside the lecture hall for a while or something, but then I saw other people quickly pass, so I just thought, okay! I’ll do the same and quickly follow behind, but I guess luck wasn’t on my side, and then this shit happened….”

“So yeah…” you sigh, “That’s what happened…” you had a slightly guilty expression.

Yuta didn’t say anything for a few moments, processing everything you just said. He was upset at what happened, annoyed that those students should’ve been more mature and careful of their surroundings and the safety of other people. “Stupid bastards”, Yuta murmurs to himself.

Suddenly, Yuta thinks back to around a week ago when he was on a video call with you. It looked like something troubled you; something had upset you. However, you insisted that it was because you were in the middle of watching one of your favourite movies, and it got to a sad part which put your mood down.

“Was that… the real reason you looked down when I video called you the other day…?”

You pressed your lips together and slowly nodded your head.

“And it wasn’t because of that one scene in Kiki’s Delivery Service where she lost her powers?”

You slowly shake your head. “No…”

“Y/N…”

“I know… I’m really sorry. I should’ve told you….” you say, fidgeting with your fingers.

“Don’t worry about it anymore, baby. I’m just glad you’re alright and you weren’t hurt any further. But just promise me not to keep these things to yourself again, okay?”

You nod your head. “I promise” You smile as Yuta cups your face and presses a kiss on your forehead.

You take your phone out of your pocket, check the time, and see that it’s already 1 PM. You sigh, and a pout slowly appears on your face. “I don’t think I’m in the mood for that lecture later….”

“Then don’t go. Get some rest, hm?” Yuta moves a few strands of hair away from your face.

You mindlessly look at the passing cars on the main road, wondering whether to skip that lecture you had in an hour. You didn't really want to, as you knew that every class is crucial for getting your master's degree. But, you were feeling slightly drowsy and beginning to feel more tired. Maybe it was the painkillers that the doctor gave you earlier.

"Missing just one wouldn't hurt, I guess…."

"How about I take you home? We can do whatever you want. I'll keep you company until my schedules later, okay?"

The pout on your face quickly turns into a smile. You nod to Yuta, "More time spent with my boyfriend."

Yuta chuckles and takes your hand in his before placing a gentle kiss on the back of your hand. "Come on, let's get you home."

taglist: @soobin-chois

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#ficscafe #neoturtles #klibrary #yuta scenarios #yuta imagines #yuta timestamps #nct scenarios #nct imagines #yuta fluff #nct yuta #yuta #nct 127 #nct #nct 127 imagines #nct 127 scenarios #nct fluff #24hrswytseries

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gingeraleluke · 3 years

Text

𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘅𝗲𝗿 ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴇʟᴇᴠᴇɴ

𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: underground!boxer!vinnie hacker x fem!influencer!reader

𝘀𝘆𝗻𝗼𝗽𝘀𝗶𝘀: a double date with vinnie and hazel! what could go wrong?

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: crying/heartbreak, reader has a nightmare about diseases/sickness (brief talks about death+animal death), smutty stuff, cute puppy fluff that will make your heart flutter, therapy talks, mentions of addiction and smoking weed, reader is hungry so vinnie shares his food 🥺

𝗔/𝗡: who is ready to see flloyd, vinnie, hazel, and y/n all alone in a room together?! i know i am 😵‍💫 ps: italic and bold= vinnie’s thoughts

series masterlist

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the color of the fine print on the document handed back to her could only mean one thing.

positive.

the excess papers stiffened under her fingertips as her eyelids lowered in demeanor. the voice of her brother was nothing but a lulling drone in her ear as she felt the urge to buckle down to the floor and cry. a small, yet bright, red light flashed over the monitor— a ringing that was easily comprehend-able, even in her state.

how can this be happening?

drake wanted to reach out and comfort his little sister, but the door bursting open stopped him. y/n ignored it, breaking from her trance and flipping through the pages. faster and faster, she tore through them. some of the edges ripped from her pace but she didn’t care. y/n was in fight or flight mode. key words that catched her eye on the pages were as follows;

violent

death

viral

contagious

permanent

water-borne

fatal

a virus had infected the pacific ocean and was all over the news. it started off killing mammals. small otters and seals before it moved on to whales and sharks. the oceans were left completely empty. the world was bound to come to an end sometime soon. all boats and human life evacuated from the water; including antarctica after reasearchers discovered that it could travel through ice variants. nothing about it made sense. almost 40% of the earths population has died and everything had gone to shit. y/n didn’t want to die. she had so many things she wanted to do in life that she hadn’t gotten to do yet. she wanted to fall in love and get married and raise a bunch of puppies. she wanted to travel the world with screaming fans that followed her everywhere she went. she wanted to watch her brother become clean and a boxing championship with a wife and everything. she wasn’t ready for some hellbent disease to take her out. a crowd of people in bright yellow hazmat suits entered the doctors room. y/n looked over to her brother in fear.

what is this, the walking dead?

“drake?” he backed away from her, sarrow on his face. “drake! please-“

“no, y/n! get away from me, you’re contagious.”

“no, please!” her chest rose as her heartbeat began to speed up. “drake!”

“take her.” he turned around and opened the door.

“DRAKE!” he left. just like that.“please, PLEASE! I don’t know how this is happening to me, but please, make it stop!”

“we have to put her down before she infects anyone else.” a lady with a russian accent spoken. she stood at the entrance of the door with a clipboard in her hand and a mask covering her mouth. “NO!” y/n writhed as men in rubber gloves grabbed on her body. their marks on her skin fueling the fire she felt. “she’s not going to cooperate, miss!” y/n could hear them through her screams in protest. “well, we’ll have to just sedate her here…” y/n felt a sharp pain in her neck as she collapsed to the floor.

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“NO!”

y/n shot up from the bed, sweat dripping down her forehead and sticking to the back of her shirt. she screwed her eyes shut and began to flail her legs around, not knowing what was going on. “hey!” flloyd ran into the room, grabbing her arm before she smacked him away. “NO!”

“y/n! Y/N!” she locked eyes with him before a analyzing his face.

it’s just flloyd.

i’m okay.

y/n started to cry, confusing flloyd furthermore and mumbling words. “where is drake?!”

“what?” he asked. “drake! i need drake! please, drake!” nothing in her thoughts we’re making any sense and all she could do was repeat her brothers name. she yearned to see him. “okay! okay..” flloyd pulled out his phone while tracing patterns on her arm. he quickly pulled up drakes contact and placed his cell up to his ear. “hey, your sister is freaking out. she needs you, hold on. here she is.” flloyd knew y/n had been having nightmares the past week, but this was different. he had never seen her so jumpy like this. “drake?” her nose was runny and her eyes were swollen with tears.

“hey, it’s me.”

“i had a nightmare again….”

“it’s okay.”

“where are you?” she trembled as flloyd watched her speak.

“i’m at the gym, just like always. everything is okay, you’re okay.”

“are you okay?”

“yes, sis. im okay.”

“you promise?” her lips turned downwards as she took deep breaths. flloyd was overwhelmed by the sight but tried to hide it from her. he didn’t want to worry her any further. “yes. i promise.” “can i..” her breath hitched and she felt her voice break at the thought of what she was going to say. “can i come see you?”

“of course.”

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despite the fact that y/n was constantly surrounded by people, she always felt somewhat alone— like a piece of her was missing. she wanted someone who would be with her all the time. who would be as dependent on her as she was on them. she wanted someone to feed and love and watch them grow. she wanted a dog. y/n had wanted her own puppy since she was a young girl, but her father never wanted one. he insisted that they weren’t responsible enough. when he passed, y/n was too scared to ask drake for one. drake wasn’t necessarily a pet person. drake was diagnosed with ocd and the idea of a dog shedding and touching everything freaked him out. so whenever y/n had that strong urge to hug a puppy to make her feel better, she would always visit simon at zach and quinn’s house.

she called zach and asked if it was alright for her to take their dog for a ride, which they happily obliged. she wiped her tears from flloyd’s lap and slipped on a pain of ripped skinny jeans. y/n threw on a grey sweatshirt with the words california west coast on it and laced up her black combat boots. she figured she’d pick up simon and grab coffee before going to the gym to see drake. she didn’t want to be a complete mess when she got there. while her black range rover was stopped at a red light, y/n put her hair up in a bun, annoyed at the strands that were blowing in her face from the widow she had cracked open. all y/n wanted to do was snuggle simon and give drake a hug.

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𝟭𝟬:𝟬𝟴 𝗔𝗠

𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻

𝗻𝗲𝘄 𝘁𝘄𝗲𝗲𝘁 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝘆/𝗻!

@ Y/N

honestly, if dogs didnt exist, i don’t think that id want to be here anymore. life without dogs would SUCK

💬304 🔁203 ❤️2.8K

replies

@ userone: no because same

@ usertwo: bestie where are you post something 🙄

@ userthree:i love my dog

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“simon! auntie y/n is here!” zach called out from the bedroom as simons paws hitting the floor drowned him out. the black french bulldog wagged his tail and shook at the sight of y/n. “hey buddy!” she leaned down, petting him. his tongue hung out from the side of his face as he looked up at her. small pants left his mouth and quinn walked up to greet y/n. “hey.” she looked up at quinn while continuing to pet the dog. “hey.” quinn responded, handing her simon’s black studded leash. “i’ll take good care of him, i promise.”

the two heard zach shout a ‘you better!’ before giggling at his response. “i will!” she turned her neck to the side to look over the edge of the wall at zach who was seated on the couch. “maybe i’ll even get you a pup cup. yeah! would you like that?!” simon let out a small bark before pawing his hand desperately and twirling around in circles, his big black ears flopping everywhere. “i think he would like that.” quinn laughed. y/n said her goodbyes after attaching the leash to his collar and walking him back to her car. “here, sit!” simon settled down in the seat as y/n walked over to the drivers seat. “you better not mess up the leather…”

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after picking up a coffee and a donut, y/n and simon were seated in the car, looking through the glass doors of the gym ahead. simon licked the pup cup residue off of his face as y/n worried about how her conversation with drake might go. she hadn’t realized the situation they were in when she called him. she forgot about the fight they had and how they hadn’t seen eachother in days. but after that nightmare, she felt like she needed her big brother. “hey, si,” she fondled the dogs ear and scratched the part she knew he liked. “uncle drake isn’t much of a dog person, so you gotta stay here. i know, i know. i’m gonna crack the window and leave the radio on, okay?i’ll be back in three minutes, i promise!”

her boots stepped up to the entrance as simon watched, his tongue hanging out, from the window. when she reached the floor she knew drake was on, she could hear josh’s voice and the sound of velcro ripping. drake was about to get ready for a warm up and was looking at something on his phone when his sister called his name. “drake?” the boy glanced up at her, taking in her appearance. everything about her seemed as usual until he saw the tears that began to water her eyes, threatening to spill. he wore a black hoodie and gym shorts and his posture was weak.

he sent her a solemn half-smile as she quickly raced into his arms. he picked his sister up and held her for a few minutes as she began crying into his blonde hair. “are you okay?” her voice was muffled. “of course i’m okay.” his arms were still wrapped around her, keeping her feet from reaching the ground. “am i okay?” she asked. “yeah.” he nodded into her hair, his body starting to sway as he held her. “are you sure?”

“yes, sis. i’m sure.” he clutched the back of her head with his hand as she took deep breaths into his neck. their were only two other people in the room, both of them uninterested in the vulnerable moment between the two. “i could never hate you, you know… do you hate me?” drake finally placed y/n’s feet back on the ground and backed away to look at her before he spoke. he just shook his head as her mouth stayed agape. “you’re my sister, y/n. we fight sometimes. it’s okay.” his words were comforting bricks that built her back up. “i hadn’t had dreams this vivid before since freddie went all psycho..“

“i know…” he pulled her close and rubbed her back. it was moments like these, that y/n loved her brother the most. when his dna wasn’t laced with anything; no hallucinogenics or paraphernalia in his veins. no alcohol, no drugs, just… drake. perfectly sober drake. “do you know why? ha-has anything been stressing you out recently?”

“no, i- well, i mean, you stress me out… and dickhead roman…” y/n remarked.

“i’m sorry..” y/n wanted to tell him about her and flloyd but she just was too scared to ruin the mood.

oh, by the way, i’m sleeping with your best friend and he bought me a diamond necklace last night!

“do you think you want to contact dr. rose again?” y/n’s blood ran cold at his words. she immediately stiffened and backed away from his grasp. “no.” she shook her head, “no, no. i’m fine, i don’t need her-“

“but y/n,”

“i’m fine drake, i don’t need therapy anymore-“

“well, everyone needs therapy!”

yeah, everyone except you, mr. ihavemissedthepastsixappointmentswithmytherapist!

he didn’t know that she knew that, so she kept her mouth shut. “and plus, she was super nice to you when you last saw her!”

“i was a kid then..”

“so? y/n if you need help-“ he placed a hand on her shoulder, before she slapped it away. “i don’t need any fucking help, okay? i’m perfectly fine.” y/n spat back, looking down at the floor. “okay…fine! but if i hear about any more nightmares or anything, i’ll call her.” he warned his sister and gave her a quick goodbye hug.

yeah, whatever.

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it had been a while since y/n played around with her makeup. she used to film makeup looks and review products all the time, but recently she’s been so busy that she just hasn’t had the chance to really sit down and beat her face. tonight was going to be different, though. even though it was just a movie night, y/n still felt the urge to look extra nice. maybe it was because of how intimidating hazel was or maybe it was the fact that she’d probably be closer to vinnie than normal. usually when she saw vinnie, it would be from across the room. there would be other people there for him to talk to and focus on… but now, they’d be sitting on the same couch, in the same room, doing god knows what.

she was nervous. and after tripping and falling onto him at the gym that one time, she was determined not to make a fool of herself tonight.

and i want to look nice for flloyd too! of course..

after applying her foundation and setting it, she packed on the shimmery powder from her contour kit to highlight her cheekbones. she applied some bronzer before coating her lashes in mascara and rummaging around her bag for a lipstick. most of her makeup was at her and drakes place, so she didn’t have much to work with. she wasn’t sure what to wear. i mean, what are you supposed to wear to movie night at someone’s house when you’ve never hung out with them before? so, she just stayed in her jeans and sweatshirt and hoped for the best.

a sparkly peach blush compact had caught her eye instead, making her impulsively apply some to her cheeks before getting back on track and looking for lipstick. she grabbed her charlotte tillbury lipstick in the shade ‘pillow talk’ and rubbed some onto her lips. she looked ethereal. her skin was clear and glowing and her lips were plump and soft. satisfied, she smiled at herself.

“are we leaving?” flloyd called out. he wore a plain black tee shirt and some shorts as he sat down, waiting for his girlfriend to finish getting ready. he wasn’t quiet sure why she was doing her makeup in the first place. “yep!” she quickly fixed her messy bun and grabbed her phone. once she reached flloyd’s car, she watched as he typed in hazel’s address into his gps.

“dolled up huh? you look nice…”

“thanks.”

“this is gonna be a long night…” he sighed, gripping the steering wheel.

sure is.

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“it’s based off of a harry styles fanfiction?!”

“yes, okay! let’s go get this over with..”

the two exited the car and approached the door when her phone dinged.

hazel

hey, we are outback but the key is under the mat so you guys can just let yourselves in

that’s not very safe of her..

flloyd looked over at y/n after reading the message from over her shoulder and the two just shrugged before grabbing the key and opening the entrance. the inside was almost blinding. windows instituted throughout the house and white decor everywhere. it was the kind of house that stressed her out just by looking at it. like she’s too afraid to touch anything. she looked over to see flloyd looking back at her with the same gobsmacked expression. the house was almost completely silent, except for the music playing quietly on a stereo somewhere. her black boots hit the wooden floors, making her stay in place. “should we take our shoes off?” she spoke quietly.

“what?” a strand of hair was still in front of his eyelashes, like it was stuck, and his voice was quite louder than hers, making the girl giggle quietly. she moved the strand of hair out from his face, catching his attention. “our shoes. i said, should we take them off?” y/n didn’t want to be rude. she remembered the time she had her first sleepover at her friends house when she was only eight. she walked up the stairs and into the girls bedroom with her old light up sketchers. her friends father freaked out and acted as if she had lit their puppy on fire or something. she never wanted to do that again. from now on, she takes her shoes off as a precaution.

poor girl, you couldn’t blame her! growing up with her dad and drake— there was never a time when the floors weren’t dusty from shoe marks or wet from getting out of the tub without drying off. she’s not sure what age drakes ocd started developing, but once it did it just got worst. now she had to make sure not to ever, ever, wear shoes when entering his room. he wouldn’t let you in his room, barefoot either! socks or else, for drake havok, no negotiation.

flloyd shrugged and watched her slide off her boots before he did the same with his white converse. they continued throughout the house, feeling weird about just entering without being ushered in— but, hazel insisted. if there was one thing that was evident about the house, it was that it had been drenched in narcissism.

it started small with just framed portraits of hazel that were sprinkled here and there throughout the hallway. it was strange how almost none of the photographs had anyone else in them, just her. some pictures y/n was sure she had seen on the girls instagram before.

who the hell prints out selfies from instagram and frames them?

then it got worse. as the two walked by the kitchen and entered the living room, they were met with a huge—no— gigantic painting of none other than hazel. it was a pop art styled piece with an artists signature at the bottom. while some of hazel’s tattoos were shown, she noted that a few were missing, meaning the painting must have been done before she got some of them. flloyd couldn’t contain his laughter as y/n tried to keep a professional face and shoved him in the arm. “shh! we don’t know, she could be watching us with some high tech cameras… lord knows she has the money for it.” the large grey couch held multiple fuzzy pillows and a small round table. feeling nosy, y/n kept a slight distance while checking out the contents of the table. the furniture was glass, making it easy to see the small grey throw rug that it was placed on top of. there was a vase with a fake-looking, yet, real flower and a box of chocolates beside it. the box was opened, leaving only three left. flloyd grabbed a chocolate square and popped it into his mouth before y/n could protest.

“flloyd!” she whisper-shouted, smacking him on the arm. he jumped, careful not to let the treat fall from his mouth. “what?” he muttered with his mouth full, “i’m hungry.”

me too.

it was 6:20pm and the two decided to skip dinner just incase hazel and vinnie had plans. she was already regretting it as she felt her tummy start to rumble. the sunset shone off of something on the table, catching her eye. it was a slate grey rolling tray with small bits of weed residue and a black grinder on it. while she didn’t know that hazel smoked weed, she definitely wasn’t surprised. suddenly, faint splashing noises and a laugh that sounded like hazel’s, emerged from ahead. she peered up to see a glass slider that led to a deck with a hot tub on it. y/n felt sick at the sight, wishing she never walked up to the slider.

hazel sat on the seat in the hot tub with her arms wrapped around vinnie’s neck. her boobs, concealed in a leopard print bikini, were pressed up against him. he was basically resting his head on her chest as he blew smoke into her mouth. an arm draped outside of the tub, holding a blunt between his fingers. he took another drag before leaning back as hazel began to straddle him, leaving hickeys down his neck and sucking right above where his right nipple was.

what in the actual fuck.

why did i come?

flloyd knocked on the slider, seeming unfazed about how explicit the two were being. vinnie jumped up, putting out the blunt on the side of the hot tub. “hey….guys! welcome!” hazel smiled, raising her hands in the air. flloyd took in her body, looking at every tattoo she had that was on display. seeing the couple together made y/n realize just how similar they looked. both of them with messy wet hair and covered in chains and tattoos. maybe they were perfect for each other.

but maybe they weren’t.

“sorry guys! we got a little carried away.” everyone stood there awkwardly, before vinnie spoke up. “shit, sorry man. did you want some?” he motioned to the blunt he had. “i would have loved some, but it’s alright.”

y/n furrowed her eyes and looked up at him.

what? you don’t smoke, flloyd. the fuck are you talking about?

god, he is such a poser sometimes.

vinnie just nodded as hazel stepped out from the tub. “alright, let me just get decent for you guys and then we can watch the movie.”

“okay…” feeling generous and holding onto the slim hope that maybe her and hazel could form a friendship, y/n offered to help with snacks.

“do you need me to help with popcorn?”

“oh, no. thanks, i’ve got it.”

“oh, well… it’s really no problem.”

“i’ll do it, i don’t want you to mess it up!” she laughed.

mess it up?

excuse me?

does she think i’m too incompetent to put popcorn in a microwave?

vinnie followed after her to her bedroom as the two stood on the deck. she couldn’t help but notice the red marks left on him. something about knowing that it was hazel who gave them to him, pissed her off, and flloyd noticed. sitting on the couch, their gaze lifted to vinnie who sat on the far right side. while flloyd sat on the other side of y/n, that left her in the middle…. which was just awkward. vinnie quickly ran to the kitchen to grab a water bottle. “ugh, i gotta pee, i’ll be right back.” flloyd skipped to the bathroom, knowing where it was from earlier when they were snooping. vinnie entered as flloyd leaved, holding two water bottles in his hands.

great, leave me alone with vinnie.

“nice lipstick.”

she was shocked at vinnie’s words as the two of them stayed seated on the couch, only two feet apart. he saw the seas of curiosity that misted her eyes and smirked. unaware of his intentions, y/n thanked him.

“you’re welcome. it’s pretty.” he handed her a water bottle and watched her take a sip from it, before finishing his sentence. “but i’m sure it would look prettier smudged.” she felt her throat close up at his words and thrusted her head forwards, trying her best not to choke. vinnie laughed at how flustered she was. “i hate you, hacker.”

“you think i want to be here with you? trust me, y/n, i hate you more.” his voice was husky and his jaw was clenched, small water droplets still framing his face. as if on cue, flloyd entered the room.

“hey.” vinnie nodded his head. he had changed into a new pair of black gym shorts, ones y/n had seen him in many times before, and a black tank top.

“hi, man. what’s up?” vinnie repeated, after a long moment of silence. when no one had answered him, he decided to make sure that y/n knew that he was in no means, talking to her, and that flloyd knew that too. flloyd looked over at him, “oh, nothing.” his eyes were set back onto his phone while vinnie still looked past y/n and at her boyfriend.

why was flloyd being so rude?

“nice…nice.” his jaw clenched as he took a sip of his water bottle.

dude, i’m just trying to make small talk.

y/n played with the chipped nail polish on her thumbs as vinnie spoke again. “are you into chick flicks like hazel is, or are you and i in the same boat?”

“uh huh…” flloyd mumbled, clearly not giving a fuck about what vinnie was saying.

okay than, suck my dick.

what the actual fuck does y/n even see in him?

“yeah, nice talking to you.” vinnie muttered under his breath, standing to his feet and walking by the couch. he was about to go check on hazel when she suddenly sprinted down the hallway. y/n’s stomach dropped at vinnie’s tone of voice. she felt bad for him.

i mean, he’s only trying to start conversation.

she involuntarily sent a glare to flloyd as hazel walked around with blankets and a bucket of popcorn. “okay, here’s your blanket and here’s me and vinnie’s.” while hazel and vinnie had a huge pink fuzzy blanket, y/n was handed a grey knitted blanket with holes in it that looked like it had been through a whole world war.

the fuck is this?

she smiled though, and acted as if it was the nicest blanket in the world. her stomach growled as she watched hazel plop a piece of popcorn into her mouth and throw one into vinnies.

where’s my popcorn? :(

hazel snuggled into vinnie’s side as she pressed play on the movie. all y/n cared about was making sure that no one could hear her extremely loud stomach.

◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦

while the two love birds on her right where chatting and flirting away, y/n couldn’t even get flloyd to talk to her. everytime she looked over at him, he was just typing away on his phone; ignoring her and the movie. y/n frowned, scooting farther from him. “okay, wait— i haven’t seen the first one, so he.. he made a bet on her?”

“mmhmm.”

“and she still wants him?”

“yep.”

who the fuc-

“i know, but come on, it’s hardin scott!” flloyd’s phone rang, causing him to ask them to hold on so he could answer. “hm? mmhmm… yeah, i’ll be right there.”

oh finally. my prince in armor has come up with an excuse to get us out of here!

“so, i gotta go.” he shoved his phone into his pocket and raced for his converse. “what?! why?”

“that was your brother, he needs something.”

“oh my gosh, is he okay?”

“yeah! yeah, he-he’s fine.”

“okay, so let me come with-“y/n reasoned. “no! if he finds out that we were together, it’ll blow our cover! i’ll be right back, alright?” vinnie saw how all of the color in y/n’s face drained at his words. he wasn’t sure what exactly she was feeling, but all he knew was she wasn’t very happy.

what a fantastic boyfriend, y/n!

sweetheart, you can do so much better.

◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦

while they continued to watch the movie, vinnie couldn’t help but hear y/n’s stomach making noises. he could tell that she was hungry, and while he didn’t know much about her, he knew she wasn’t the kind of person to ask someone for food. so, he stood up and grabbed a bag of cheetos from the kitchen and sat down. a minute later, he exaggerated a sigh. “ugh, i don’t feel like cheetos anymore..” he acted, making an uncertain face and looking over to see y/n perched up at the words he said. “here.” he tossed the bag of cheetos onto her lap, making her eyes light up. he leaned backwards so hazel wasn’t in the way of her and smiled at her. y/n mouthed a ‘thank you’ and he mouthed a ‘you’re welcome’ back.

y/n hated vinnie hacker, but this vinnie hacker? she could deal with. y/n wished that he could be like this all the time. this was the side of him that made her want to tear herself apart from the inside.

why does he make me feel like this?

y/n ate her cheetos while watching the movie, until the first dreaded sex scene played. she watched harden kiss tessa feverishly while gripping her ass before turning her around and mounting her. hazel giggled and began tugging on vinnie’s hair suggestively as she watched.

why is she touching me, what the hell just happened-

oh. sex scene.

while hardin kissed tessa’s inner thighs, y/n felt her own thighs begin to clench.

no, okay? don’t be horny, not with them right next to you.

◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦

flloyd had messaged y/n, letting her know that he wouldn’t be able to pick her up and that she’d have to ask them for a ride. which of course meant that she would be alone with the couple for the rest of the night. not only that, but hazel’s house was hot. way too hot for y/n’s liking, and she began to feel suffocated in her sweatshirt. her eyes looked over at hazel and took in the tank top and calvin klein underwear shorts she wore. her top had ‘for those who sin’ embroidered on it and her legs were basically naked. “god, it’s hot in here…”

“oh, yeah. hey, just take off your sweatshirt! it must be killing you.”

um… what?

“but, i only have a bra on under it..”

“so? i’m in underwear, girl! you’ll fit right in, come on!”

“umm… i think i-“ she was cut off by water seeping through her shirt and looked up to see vinnie holding his water bottle. “oops! sorry!” he smiled.

you dick.

“well now you have to take it off! come on, it’s just us!”y/n rolled her eyes and peeled off the shirt, showing her bra and bare chest for the two to see. her bra was white and lace with a small pink bow in the middle and the sight of her in it made vinnie do a double take.

fuck.

he didn’t know what he expected her bra to look like, but it definitely wasn’t that. he gulped before putting his focus back on the tv. “i’m gonna grab another water, do you want one?”

“no, i’m okay.” vinnie declined and watched her walk down the hallway. it took everything in him not to lock his eyes on y/n’s bare chest. he had to pink his kneecaps and grind his teeth to keep himself preoccupied. when hazel came back, she sat on the edge of the sofa instead of the middle. now, vinnie had a perfect view of y/n in all her glory. raking a hand through his hair, he focused his gaze on the tv.

every now and then, his sunken brown eyes would flicker down to her cleavage. the way she was sitting with her knees pressed against her and the television light shining down on her— oh, god was it pornographic. all of that skin, blank. just waiting for his devilish mouth to sink into and leave marks that not even a shower could wash off.

fuck, vinnie, stop it.

◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦

everything was going perfectly fine until the shower scene. hazel sat on vinnie’s lap, still out of view for his gaze on y/n. he tried getting her to switch sides so he wouldn’t be tempted to look over, but she wouldn’t budge. vinnie watched as hardin pulled the girls panties down and couldn’t help but wonder if y/n’s bottoms matched her bra. he watched hardin lather the soap into tessa’s back, massaging her body up and down. flashbacks from when y/n fell on top of him flooded his thoughts. how smooth her arms felt when he gripped them as he stood up. how disheveled she looked, her hair a mess and face all bashful. testing the waters, he returned his eyes onto y/n’s body. not just taking in her tits, but her face too. the innocent look in her eyes as she watched the explicit scene had him weak in the knees.

so innocent… i want to break her.

y/n observed hardin as he made out with tessa in the shower. she found herself focusing on his tattoos and the way that the water slid down them. she couldn’t help but think back at how vinnie looked in that hot tub. the steam and bubbles he sat in and how sinful he looked with his chains and tattoos as he took another hit. she imagined how good of a kisser he’d be. how his tongue would fit underneath her’s and how rough he’d tug on her hair if it was them instead, in the shower. the moans that left tessa’s mouth and the way her body shook as hardin paid mind to every single inch of her body, had y/n clenching her thighs and feeling a second heartbeat. she wondered what vinnie would sound like moaning. how fast he would go, how hard. biting her lip, y/n looked over at vinnie, only to see him staring back at her.

fuck.

the way hazel sat on his lap, made him even more turned on. “i’m gonna grab another pillow-“ vinnie interrupted hazel by digging his hands into her waist. “wait, you might have to wait a second…” hazel got the hint and laughed mischievously, making y/n’s hands go numb. she began to grind down slowly, which resulted in him throwing his head back and squeezing his eyes shut. the intensity of the scene made her drop her drink and y/n shifted her position, now laying down on her stomach and holding herself up on her elbows as she reached down for her water bottle. vinnie opened his eyes and looked over to see her boobs practically spilling out of her bra. he averted his vision to the tv, only to see tessa on her knees, preparing to suck hardin off.

for fucks sake, i can’t take this.

“i’m gonna go to the bathroom… vinnie, babe, i need your help with something!” she felt his hard on pressed against her, and decided it was time to make a move, no matter who was in the room with them or not.“mmhmm, yep!” he jumped quickly after her.

“wait! should i pause it?”

“oh, no! i’ll just rewatch it in the morning!” hazel quipped, a hand around her neck as vinnie tugged her into in the bathroom. y/n heard vinnie let out a groan and plead an, ‘i need you so fucking badly.’ before closing the door.

great.

◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦

y/n could practically hear it all. the grunting, the slamming, the moaning. she tried her best to focus on the movie but it was hard when the walls were shaking so bad that she could hear the floor creak. vinnie and hazel had been going at it for so long, that y/n lost track of time and eventually finished the movie. she sat their, idiotically, on her phone, scrolling through tiktok while trying to ignore the fact that vinnie was fucking the soul out of hazel just a few feet away. she grew tired and changed the channel to mtv. reruns of old music videos played as y/n began to hum along. it was now past midnight and her brain began to feel fuzzy.

♫ 𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴: 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗯𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗯𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗼𝗹𝗶𝗰𝗲

shit, i have to get home still.

she then remembered that she wouldn’t be going home, but would instead being going to flloyd’s. her boyfriend. sighing, she laid her head against the pillow, feeling the soft texture against her bare stomach. she continued playing games on her phone when a very disheveled hazel and vinnie entered.

every breath you take

every move you make

“i call the couch!” vinnie yawned, seemingly out of it.“ugh, no fair! i call the…bed. fuck, i’m tired! vinnie, make sure you come back to bed and see our guest out!”

every bond you break

every step you take

i’ll be watching you

“yeah, yeah!” he mumbled, his hair a mess and flopping around everywhere. vinnie turned into a child whenever he was tired. “i’m sorry, i’m so fucking tired..” he looked up at y/n with sarrow-filled eyes. “it’s okay! it’s fine, get some rest.”

every single day

every word you say

“you mind if i just…” the boys hair hit her thigh as his face landed onto the couch, laying right next to her legs. he held an arm out that draped over y/n’s knee and off of the couch.

every game you play

every night and day

i’ll be watching you

a moment passed before vinnie clutched y/n’s thigh and pulled her closer, now resting his head onto her lap as his face softened under the light of the tv. he looked so innocent. y/n reached out to touch his hair before stopping herself.

i have a boyfriend.

but, this isn’t cheating! just… playing with hair, that’s all.

oh cant you see?

you belong to me

she found herself caressing vinnie’s cheek, taking in the small freckles that scattered his skin. she haven’t touched him or been this close to him since she fell on him. the type of energy he fed her from just a single touch, was remarkable. when vinnie was unconscious, he seemed so pure. she found herself wanting to protect the boy who laid on her lap. his pink lips were slightly parted as snores left his mouth. y/n felt special. she felt… lucky to be able to see vinnie so vulnerable. a drop of water hit her hand as she played with his curls.

how my poor heart aches

with every step you take

time went on, yet, y/n hadn’t noticed that she was crying. she couldn’t figure out why.

why would i be upset?

what ever could it be?

since you’ve gone i’ve been lost without a trace

i dream at night i can only see your face

the realization hits her like an antidepressant she had fiend to take. shaking her head, she let the tears fall, careful not to let any land on the boy.

i look around but it’s you i can’t replace

i feel so cold and i long for your embrace

his unconscious fingers pressed against her ankle as she fought the urge to play with them. it hurt her, doing this, but it was like a car crash; you don’t want to look but you just can’t look away. the reason she was upset was the car that slammed into her in that moment.

i keep crying, baby, baby please

oh cant you see?

you belong to me

it’s because he isn’t yours.

and how my poor heart aches

with every step you take

- - - - -

“love is a disease and disease knows no laws.” - ivan turgenev

━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━

@justalostgirl @obliviatevamps @letsjustbeourselves @starslcve @itskoushi @stephdolan @bakerkells @vinnieslut @queenyamimarrero @mrs-woodwesleyobrien @isabelleforest73 @radioblah-blah @morganwilliams @creepytoes88 @wrldofspice @lovenoughton @soapiaa @tremendousalpacawitch @bellamyblakeswhore @sabnstyles @devilsbooksworld @lidiyabest @maurauderswhxre @plutooryectors @janesofia7 @aleksanderblack

#vinnie hacker x reader #the boxer #the boxer fic #vinnie hacker #vinnie hacker angst #vinnie hacker fanfic #vinnie hacker smut #vinnie hacker fluff

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ftkestis · 2 years

Text

Ten Characters I Fell in Love With in 2021

tagged by @highflyerwings my beloved thank u for giving me something to post

i’m also not sure if this is supposed to regulated to only kdramas/kfilm but considering that’s the only thing i watched in 2021 we’ll just go with it. these are definitely in order bc i’m a hater before anything else and have no problem ranking my faves xoxo

1. han juwon (beyond evil, 괴물)

genuinely cannot express how much i love juwon. i wrote this big emo post that maybe gets close. but never have i ever identified so closely with a character, we are one and the same. juwon has the best and most beautiful character arc i have ever seen in television ever and to the day i die i will love him so fervently it makes me ill

2. lee dongsik (beyond evil, 괴물)

along with juwon, absolute banger character. even through so much personal pain he’s the first to look out for others and even tho his actions are morally questionable it was with the greatest intent—to make sure it never, ever happened again. his role in juwon’s transformation is just chefs kiss i love their relationship and yes they are gay

3. jung taeju (my name, 마이 네임)

also cannot express how much i desperately love this man and his actor lee hakjoo. life changing. master class in acting and being sexy thank yew. also i am the only person who knows him intimately and am the authority on him for a reason xoxo

4. han hoyeol (d.p., 디피)

wow i love hoyeol. even tho junho is the focus of the series (arguably) i think hoyeol is one of the best and most complicated/fleshed out characters in the series and we get only the smallest hints of what he might really be going through and i just. big kith

5. k (the devil judge, 악마판사)

my best friend called my favorite character list the gallows 😵‍💫 anyway i projected so much onto him it was absurd i literally cried for 2 hours when he [redacted] and that’s not an exaggeration i’m a nightmare

6. han jiwoo (to my star, 나의 별에게)

this was the 2nd bl i watched and wow i also latched completely onto jiwoo bc we are also the same person, super reserved and cold and reluctant to catch feelings 💔 i love my grumpy little guy

7. oh jihoon (beyond evil, 괴물)

the running theme here is that i absolutely fell in love with every character in beyond evil but jihoon is so special. yoonsu’s little dimples are so sweet and also i liked the way that jihoon is seen as a very innocent, sweet person and that even the innocent/sweet aren’t free from suspicion like it hurt to see him so scared but the fact that the writing didn’t spare him that is just. [hoover noises]

8. kang yohan (the devil judge, 악마판사)

morally ambiguous, borderline villain, sexy, likes to choke gaon. do i need to say more

9. jung jaeheon (sweet home, 스위트 홈)

this mfer was so badass (and sexy) with the sword???? woof woof woof woof woof woof woof

10. cha hyunsoo (sweet home, 스위트 홈)

i actually loved his character a lot and song kang did soooo well. like the tortured loner/monster is just so good and song kang is so cute and i absolutely devoured sweet home in one day aaaaugghhh

gonna tag my fwends @bobafvcks @godotismissingx um um um idk who else i can’t remember usernames

#10 characters tag #idk where to file this aaaughh #kerah shut up #there i guess

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mercurygguk · 2 years

Note

Hey, so first of all I would like to tell you how much I love your ‘‘risqué‘‘ series. I remember reading the first part a few months ago and just being intrigued by it ! When I saw you upload part two some time later, it felt like I lost the connection that I had with the story and I didn’t read it. The following drabbles and part three were also left unread. While I was opening tumblr a few days ago, I saw a post of you abt your ‘‘risqué‘‘ series and somehow got interested again. I also noticed that I completely forgot what had happened in the first part so I decided to read the first part again. After that I read every single part and just finished your last Drabble after the third part. I am I love !!! The whole story line, the angst about Jk’s future, their age gap, y/n being mature but at the same time still acting young and childish sometimes is the best. Sometimes I find I rather unpleasant to read when there is too much smut in stories so the third part has to be my favorite ! I loved reading abt their general lives more than just him eating her out for the 100th time tbh. Not that i don’t like it, please don’t misunderstand me. I just find reading abt their personal lives and feelings more entertaining. The end of part three literally had me gasping also ! I can imagine the big storm that is about to come ! But did you have to surprise them on jk‘s birthday ? Really ? :( anyways. I just wanted to tell you how hooked I am for this series and I wish you the best to finish it as best as you can ! I have a question in mind tho ( 😏 ). Will there be parts in which we will see a jealous y/n ? since it was always jk being the jealous one with the cute guy at the hotel or the frat boys. I would really like to know y/n‘s reaction to a woman being interested in her man. But I guess that’s a thing for another time ? I think they have to be ready for the storm that has arrived :( Loving your story and sending a lot of kisses 🧚🏻💕✨

oh my god thank you so so MUCH for such a long, wonderful message!! 😭

okay, first of all, i’m so glad you came back and have read all the parts omg that makes me SO happy :( I’m also really happy to hear you enjoyed the story sm!

i totally get your point about fics sometimes containing too much smut, it’s so much more interesting to hear about their lives and their feelings and how they evolve as people! and i appreciate that you notice all these things about them💓 it makes me feel very satisfied with my writing!

second of all, your question about y/n being jealous – yes! we will have some of that in the next part! i won’t elaborate on it but you’ll see soon enough 🤪

and third – yes, i had to surprise them on his bday. i’m a sucker for cliché scenarios and it felt like the perfect moment to create some drama lmao. the next part will definitely have a lot of angst, lots of drama and lots of LOVE bc these two are so smitten with each other it’s actually disgusting tbh (but i still love it) 😵‍💫

thank you again! pls look forward to the next parts and have a great day 🥺 sending you lots of hugs and kisses bc ur so sweet and ily omg :(

#ask #risqué jjk

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vintagemulti · 2 years

Text

rainfall (part four)

parings: bradley “rooster” bradshaw x pilot!reader

desc: this was the mission someone wasn’t coming back from; you were sure of it. you just hoped to god it wasn’t the man you loved.

warnings: swearing, angst, alcohol, sad bradley bc that is a warning itself, two oblivious idiots it’s painful, self-loathing/mental health struggles

a/n: ellie going back to her roots and doing a filler chapter for chapter four😵‍💫 i only plan on this being like 6/7 parts btw, this won’t be a long as my other series (which u should 100% read if you’re into moonknight) but i’ll see how ur goes. disclaimer that i know nothing about the navy or planes. also reblogs to wayyyyy more than likes so…

series masterlist

masterlist

if you didn’t understand the rules of american football before, it was no exaggeration to say that you were completely lost now. what could you say? you were never into sports as a child.

all you managed to gather was this - bradley was on your team, pass to him. don’t let someone take the ball and if someone has the ball; take it from them.

both of those things, at once. god, this was brutal.

it was too hot, too muggy - even though you were only wearing shorts and a sports bra, you still felt like you needed to strip and dive into an ice cold pool. maverick was crazy for making you do this in this heat; did he want you all to get heatstroke?

“are we ready to play?” he yelled from the opposite team’s side, whistle hanging from his lips.

“ready… go!”

and the game began - the boys instantly crashing int each other, because apparently none of them were taught that it’s just a game and that no, it’s not actually that deep.

but you wouldn’t try to tell them that, not now, anyways.

“rainfall, here!” fanboy called, throwing the ball straight to you.

catching it, you froze. who did you throw it to again? oh, yeah, bradley.

“rooster,” you called, aiming at him and throwing.

pheonix laughed from beside you, her memory of your god awful football skills serving her well. really - there was a million other sports you could play, but american football really, truly, was not one.

payback came into your field of view, charging at you full force. it took you a whole second to decide that no, it was not worth trying to defend it, and you should just get out of the goddamn way.

you stood back for a moment - watching everyone around you smiling and completely immersed in the game, even maverick was playing; his duties surrounding the mission completely slipping his mind.

and it was in that exact moment that you felt completely, utterly, wholly useless.

it didn’t happen a lot - the feeling you had. sure, you’d struggled with depression in your teenage years, but it was something you’d gotten help for - you were better.

but in a job like this, where you were so used to having control over everything, the moments where you felt useless and unwanted hit harder than ever.

so you did what your therapist had told you to do all those years ago - walk away. you walked away from the group, none of them even noticing your absence.

well, that’s what you thought.

bradley watched you leave, not even taking a look back at your teammates, his face falling with every step you took. he knew about your mental health struggles, and he couldn’t help but feel guilty - had he cause this?

his actions, everything that happened last night; was this is fault?

he knew that it would take forever to explain things to you, even longer for you to forgive him. but fuck - in that moment, as you got further and further away from the group, bradley wished that he hadn’t done anything last night.

the ball was thrown to him, but he didn’t care. you were his priority; you’d always been his priority, always would be. nothing could ever change that.

“rooster!” payback called, hands up in confusion as bradley completely missed the ball.

picking it up from where it had fallen beside him, bradley gave it a half-assed toss, not even checking his aim; he didn’t care where it landed.

maverick had stopped to look at him now, already half knowing what had changed bradley’s mood so quickly. the younger boy was stood completely still, eyes fixed on where you had been only a few minutes before.

“bradley,” maverick called to him, making him turn. “just go to her.”

it was like he had been waiting for someone to tell him, just needing those four words to be set into action, letting him move.

and so bradley turned back around, setting off in your footsteps. a walk turned into a jog, his eyes scanning all over for you, the only sign being your footsteps left on the sand.

it was colder inside. the short walk from the beach to the hard deck had cooled you down, just a little. but you couldn’t help the burning feeling in your gut, travelling up through your throat and reaching your eyes.

you stared into your own eyes, watching them get redder and clouding over with tears, not even trying to stop them before they fell, only adding to the mascara streaks down your face.

god, why were you like this? why did you have to be so goddamn sensitive about everything? it wasn’t like bradley cared - he was perfectly happy with carrie, or whatever the hell her name was.

you let yourself fall against the bathroom wall, slowly losing sight of yourself in the mirror as you slid down.

it took everything you had in you not to claw at your own skin, peel the flesh off until you were nothing but a puddle of blood and bones on the floor. but then again - what would that solve?

after spending most of your teenage years going through phases like this, you knew the feeling would pass in a day or so. but in that moment, if felt like it would last forever. the guilt of fucking someone else and secretly wishing it was bradley; bradley, the man who would never love you how you loved him.

bradley, the man who - unknown to you - had just walked into the hard deck.

letting your head hit against the wall, you closed your eyes. this part was the worst - the longing, the knowing that if bradley was there he would be able to fix everything. if only he looked at you the way you looked at him.

if only he didn’t want other girls; didn’t look at their asses when they walked past and for once, just once stared at you like that.

the funny thing was - he did. he constantly stared at you. when you weren’t looking.

“did y/n come in here?” bradley asked, looking around the bar for you but only seeing one, sad looking, glass sitting on the bar.

“she’s in the bathroom,” penny smiled over a crate of beer. “i thought you’d come looking.”

luckily for you, you hadn’t heard them speaking, if you had - what would you have done anyway? would you have wipes your tears, stood up and ran out the door? or would you have stayed exactly where you were, that selfish part inside you glad that bradley had finally come to save you?

speaking of which; he approached the door, getting as close to is as possible without pressing his ear against it, listening for any sign of you behind the door. a sign, which came in the form of a small, hitched breath; something that came out as more of a gasp.

“y/n?” he almost whispered, knuckles tapping against the door.

you froze. no - it couldn’t be, could it? had he really come running after you? fuck. fuck - no, it couldn’t be.

“y/n, you in there?” bradley repeated, your suspicions being completely confirmed - it was him.

“i’ll-” you started, voice betraying you with a crack. “i’ll just be a second.”

but bradley knew you far better than that.

“let me in, sugar,” the pet name had you choking back a sob, biting into your hand to stop the noise coming out. “please.”

it took you a moment to decide whether you’d let him in or not. a full moment - but the selfish side of you won. the little voice in the back of your head that sounded a little bit like pheonix; mumbling how you’d always had a chance with bradley.

the lock clicked, and bradley slowly turned the handle, not quite knowing what to expect on the other side.

what he did see, though, almost spilt his heart down the middle.

you were stood a few steps away, eyes, red and puffy, fixed firmly on the floor, you head tilted down - in a half-assed attempt to hide the mascara trails that ran down your cheeks. the way you were standing, like an insecure little girl, arms folded over your chest, hugging yourself.

any anger you thought bradley was holding towards you completely faded away.

“oh, sugar,” he stepped forward, almost scooping you into his arms. “what? what is it, darlin’?”

you felt so completely enveloped in him, it was completely blissful. his scent; the smell of beach water mixed with a spray of his cologne, his feel, everything - he had you completely covered in him.

“i can’t-” words failed you. “not here- i can’t.”

“alright,” bradley hummed, you could feel the vibration of his voice in his chest. “alright, sweets, i’ll take you home.”

bradley’s house was exactly the same as the last time you were there. even down to the jackets hanging on the back of the front door, everything was the same. after all - it had only been, what? a six months, since you’d been here? in his house?

he led you to his couch, sitting you down so gently you half thought he expected you to shatter.

but he didn’t - not really. you’d been friends with bradley long enough for him to know exactly what to do in this situation, how to handle you at your most vulnerable.

“alright, sugar, do you wanna talk to me?” bradley asked, sitting down next to you, hand wrapping around your shoulders.

“i just-” you took a breath. you just what? how in the hell were you meant to be honest with him and keep your oldest secret? “it’s nothing, really.”

maybe saying nothing at all would do the trick.

“it’s clearly not nothing,” his tone was so soft; like his voice was laced with bubble wrap to make sure he didn’t come across the wrong way. “y/n, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t-”

“i slept with hangman.”

the words came out quicker than you could have stopped them, tumbling out of your mouth and leaving you no room to even try to catch them.

“i know.”

“what?” you looked at him. “how?”

“i saw you,” bradley swallowed like the words were bitter on his tongue. “when i was driving cassie home.”

cassie - you’d almost forgot her name. but it still stung to hear him say it; say it like she was someone to him.

“oh, right.” you couldn’t hide the bitter tone.

“why do you feel bad for that, sugar? did he- did hangman do something? did he take advantage of you? i swear to god - i’ll kill him if-”

“no,” you almost laughed, placing a hand on his chest. “no, bradley, he didn’t. i just- i feel bad because… it wasn’t him i wanted to sleep with.”

bradley furrowed his eyebrows. “what do you mean?”

now you were fucked. you’d said too much - how did you get out of this hole you’d dug for yourself? “it doesn’t matter, really, i just feel like i used him, you know?”

“who would you rather be having sex with?”

the question took you completely by surprise. you’d spoke about sex with bradley before, it wasn’t a topic you’d ever shied away from - but how in the hell did you dodge this question?

“i-” your mind went blank. “i didn’t mean it like that, i mean- i was kinda mad, you know? i don’t like fucking like that, like a stress reliever. i dunno, it makes me feel like i’m using them.”

“why were you mad?”

you couldn’t lie this time. “‘cause you treated me like shit all last night.”

bradley hung his head, nodding. “i’m sorry. y/n, i mean that. i’d had one too many to drink and i was in a bad mood, i- i shouldn’t have taken it out on you. i really am sorry.”

smiling, you relaxed slightly. communication was always important to you - and this was one friendship you refused to lose after one fight.

“bradley?” he looked back up at you. “why didn’t you tell me about cassie?”

“well,” he laughed lightly. “i didn’t think it was that important, you know? i doubt you’d really care, honestly.”

“what?” you looked at him, slightly shocked. “bradley, of course i care! i’m your best friend, i’m like- the person who would care about this stuff the most.”

he looked at you for a moment. “y/n- who do you think cassie is to me?“

“she’s-” you furrowed your eyebrows. “she’s your girlfriend, right? or something close?”

“oh my god,” bradley laughed. “oh my god.”

you stared at him, totally confused. it felt like some inside joke you weren’t in on.

“y/n,” he smirked. “she’s my cousin.”

it was hilarious. absolutely fucking laughable. god - it was divine comedy at its peak. your mouth fell into an ‘O’ shape, slowly nodding. bradley’s giggles sounded from beside you, clearly he was finding this funny.

you were completely relieved. totally, selfishly, one hundred percent relieved. so you laughed too. laughed at yourself; how you’d gotten so upset over something you had no idea about.

whether a second or five minutes passed, you weren’t sure. the sound of bradley’s laugh, so completely drowned in happiness, it was music to your ears. a drug you were so totally addicted to, you’d cut off your own leg if it meant you could hear his boyish giggles.

god, you were in love with him.

and bradley was thinking the exact same thing about you.

once you’d finally stopped laughing, quiet came over you, a familiar kind of comfortable quiet, embracing the two of you and enveloping the room with a hum that settled in both of your souls.

or maybe that was a slightly rom-com version of saying; it went quiet.

meeting bradley’s eyes in the quiet, you couldn’t help but stare into them.

his eyes, god his eyes. you loved everything about him but his god damn eyes. they were like whisky, filling up the glass of his iris until it was just about overflowing. they were like jack daniels at the end of a bad day, a little distillery in the scottish highlands turning out the best thing you’d every tasted.

and by god - you would drink whisky every day if it felt like his eyes.

the world around you seemed to stop spinning as you stared into his irises, the couch you were sitting on melting into you until it felt like you were pure mass.

it must have been a genetic impulse. to lean in, to let gravity pull you towards him. you moved your gaze from his eyes to his lips, suddenly imagining what it would feel like to have them on yours.

there couldn’t have been more than a few inches between your faces now, an electric heat in between the two of you as your breath combined, fanning onto each other’s faces.

“y/n,” bradley whispered, the words hitting your ears and snapping you from your chance.

the way he whispered your name woke you up. fuck - what on god’s earth were you thinking? you were his best friend. nothing else. don’t be stupid, y/n. he doesn’t want you.

you pulled back quicker than bradley realised, his eyes still on the spot your lips had been milliseconds before.

clearing your throat, you felt the air around you turn awkward for the first time in years.

“takeout and a movie?” you proposed, hoping to god it would put a bandaid on whatever wound you’d just opened between you two.

“of course,” bradley smiled like nothing even happened. did anything even happen just then, or did you imagine it? “i’ll order.”

nodding, you watched him stand up and walk to where his phone was. you took a hand to your lips, swearing that when you touched the flesh you felt electric shocks.

fuck - you hoped bradley would forget that ever happened. bradley on the other hand; hoped he’d never forget that happened.

“good morning aviators,” it wasn’t maverick’s voice this time. “we have some news for you.”

the admiral eyed all of you, making sure he had everyone’s attention before continuing; “your mission date has been moved forward by ten days.”

“oh, shit,” hangman mumbled from beside you.

“this means that you have under a week to complete your training-”

“but sir,” payback piped up. “none of us except rainfall have completed the route yet, and even she fainted.”

“which is exactly why you’re going to be working double as hard, starting today. i’ll now hand over to your teacher.”

and with that he was gone.

“alright,” maverick walked to where the admiral stood a few seconds prior. “same route, in teams of four planes this time. i’ll give you an order, and please-” he looked at you. “no passing out.”

a few people sniggered, leaving you rolling your eyes. you were at ten point three g’s - what the hell were you supposed to do? and you’d lost at least a cup of blood. like they would stay conscious in that situation.

“alright, team one; yale as your team leader, fritz as your wingman, omaha and harvard in dagger two, halo and coyote in dagger three.”

the six of them stood up, walking to the door and waiting to be dismissed. maverick waved them off, chatting amongst themselves as they walked down the corridor.

“do you think any of them can manage it?” hangman asked you, watching the door close behind them.

you hummed; “maybe. yale’s a good pilot.”

“better than you?” he raised an eyebrow.

scoffing, you turned to him. “better than you? than any of us? we’re all the best of the best, jake. don’t be bitter.”

“hey, come on,” he raised his hands in defence. “i was just asking. you know, giving you something to think about.”

“have you been listening to like, anything, maverick said?” you smirked. “we don’t think up there. stop trying to sabotage me.”

“oh, yeah,” you were glad he got the joke. “that’s definitely what i’m trying to do.”

laughing, you turned away from him, looking at bradley. he seemed a million miles away, staring out of the window into the big wide ocean. you wondered where his mind was, but judging from the way he stared at the water, you knew what he was thinking about already.

his dad’s anniversary was coming up.

as it turns out, yale must not have been a good enough pilot, because none of the group managed to complete the route on time. not a single plane would have made it back if this had been a real mission.

“alright, next group is all of you guys. i want rainfall as a team leader, pheonix and bob as your wingman. fanboy and payback in dagger three, rooster and hangman in dagger four.”

without having to turn around, you could picture both bradley and jake’s faces. god, it was a sight to behold. they really were like two spoiled little kids.

did it surprise you to be made team leader? no. you’d been the only person who’d completed the course, and if you hadn’t passed out everything would have went completely ideally.

praying you wouldn’t pass out again this time, you followed the rest of your team out to the planes.

you could still hear hangman and bradley behind you, muttering insults at each other like little children who never learned the meaning of teamwork. it made you smile, knowing that no matter what happened, those task would always hate each other.

yes, it was a strange thing to be smiling about, but it was the sense of stability, a hatred that had been there since they met each other all those years ago and would most likely still be there until the day they died.

not that they really hated each other. you knew that, it was all an act deep down. bradley respected hangman, hangman respected bradley. they just didn’t like to show it.

it went in a blur - from being given your safety briefing to taking off, it felt like you had blinked and you were a thousand feet in the air.

“rainfall, proceed to the coordinates on your dash. everyone else, follow her.” maverick said over the radio; he was supervising the flight.

“got it,” you mumbled back, turning to follow the directions in front of you.

it was the same place you’d gone the last time for this training, you noticed. the same big, open desert, surrounded by forest, spanning what seemed to be hundreds of miles.

“alright, everyone in place?”

checking your controls once more, you nodded to yourself; “i’m good, mav.”

“we’re good.” fanboy replied.

“all good here.” pheonix said.

“yeah, us too.” hangman agreed.

“good. your time starts… now!”

you sped up instantly, pushed back in your chair from the force. pheonix was behind you, a shocked noise coming from her when she realised just how fast you were going.

g-force pushed against you, everything twist and turn you took pressing down on your lungs, like an elephant was standing on top of you.

“thirty seconds in, im about a quarter of the way there.” you stated.

“christ, rainfall, you’re fast.” pheonix answered. “i can’t even see you.”

laughing lightly, you turned to look behind you, pheonix and bob not even appearing in the distance.

“then get faster.” you said.

“speaking of faster,” fanboy groaned. “slow down, hangman, you’re up my ass.”

“you should’ve put pheonix behind you, fan, maybe then you two would be going at the right pace.” hangman answered, cocky tone dripping through the radio.

“that’s a minute, i’m half way there. pheonix, you gotta hurry up. i need that laser on time.”

as you said it, the pair of them appeared behind you, gaining speed with every turn they took.

“happy?” pheonix asked.

“very. like christmas.” you laughed.

the rest of the route was like a second nature to you, each curve coming to you almost naturally. it was here that your nose had started bleeding before, leading to you passing out.

you prayed the pressure wasn’t too much this time; you could not afford another accident. you’d never be put on the mission if you passed out again.

“alright, pheonix, you ready?” you asked, taking a quick look behind you to see where she was.

“always, rainfall.”

pulling up, you felt the g-force push you back, just slightly. this was nothing compared to what was coming.

“alright bob, get that laser ready.” you said, eyes fixed on the target.

“shit- there’s something wrong with this laser, it won’t catch.” he replied, hint of urgency in his voice.

“are you fucking kidding me!?” you yelled back, target getting even closer. there wasn’t enough time.

“i’m sorry, i’m trying everything to-”

“forget it, i’ll drop blind!”

trying to aim without a laser was hard - harder when time was running out. fuck, this shot would have to do.

“bombs away!” you yelled, already hundreds of feet away.

“bullseye!” bob called over the radio, making you let out a relived sigh.

and then you had to pull up. pull up - against the force that pushed you back, so much that you thought you’d go falling through the entire plane and put onto the ground.

you were pulling seven g’s now. seven point five. eight. fuck, your vision was blurring at the edges. your breathing was slow, rigid, like the oxygen wasn’t really getting to you at all.

everything felt light. like you were floating. you could feel your hands, tingly and shaky and slipping off of your controls. you couldn’t form any thoughts, just the overwhelming feeling of calm.

the world was quiet, dull. the ringing in your ears was the only sound audible to you, and even then it didn’t bother you. the bliss of unconsciousness was just about to overtake you and-

“get that fucking laser ready, rooster!” fanboy yelled.

and you were awake again, hands gripping your controls and pushing you forward, levelling yourself after pulling up.

“you alright, rainfall?” maverick asked over the radio, scratchiness scraping against your ears.

“all good,” you mumbled, voice slightly weak. “still awake.”

“i’ve got a lock, i’ve got a lock!” rooster cried, clearly having fun trying to work a laser.

“alright, bombs away!” payback yelled.

both you and pheonix were level now, watching the two of them pull up from a few hundred feet away. you could hear their groans over the radio, bradley taking a few gasps follow by a strained ‘fuck’.

that should not have been as attractive to you as it was.

they were almost there now, twenty seconds more or less and they’d be fine. they just had to stay awake.

which is far easier said than done, clearly, because fanboy seemed to go quiet over the radio, payback getting louder in his calls to his wingman.

“fanboy, you alright?” maverick asked.

and then you saw it - the plane losing balance, turning nose to the ground and falling. fanboy passed out.

“fuck, he’s in g-lock!” payback yelled, voice laced with fear. “fuck, wake up, man!”

“shit,” maverick mumbled, his own plane coming into your view. “let’s hope this works again.”

maverick lined himself up with the other plane, clearly trying to get a dial tone to wake fanboy up. it worked for you, right?

“come on, give me tone, give me tone.” he mumbled.

you felt completely powerless, all you could do was watch. two pilots could die right now, and all you’d be able to do was stare as they went down.

“oh, fuck- oh shit!” fanboy finally yelled, pulling up straight away.

“christ,” you let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding in, leaning back in your seat.

fanboy came level with the rest of you, clearly shaken up. payback was still yelling at him, something about almost getting both of them killed.

“shit, birds!” maverick interrupted them both, making you turn around in your seat.

about twenty birds were coming straight for you, making you break right straight away. but pheonix didn’t think so fast; you saw a bird fly straight into one of her engines, instantly causing a fire.

“right engine is out!” bob yelled.

“disconnecting power and restarting,” pheonix blurted. “fuck, it didn’t go out.”

you could see them, much like fanboy and payback just minutes before, on a downward spiral - fast. pheonix was an amazing pilot, you had no doubts about that; but there was no way she can pull this back.

and you heard just as much, over the radio; her desperate attempts to keep in the air, downed out by mavericks begs for her to just eject.

she must have tried absolutely everything else, because after a particularly desperate plea from maverick, you saw both pheonix and bob eject.

you watched, mouth half open and breaths shaky. the thought you’d pushed to the back of your mind reading it’s head once more;

this was the mission someone wasn’t coming back from.

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