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slytherinslut0 · 6 months

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MATTHEO RIDDLE- Beg For Me

Chapter Twenty Two-Info: You and Mattheo have been butting heads for months, since you were assigned as his tutor, and one day, during a session full of tense bickering, he has enough.

(This will essentially be a toxic book where we are Theos fucktoy. No love here, very minimal fluff.)

Tags: very angst. lots of emotions going on here. reader proves herself to the syltherin boys. honestly just a really playful, fun, light chapter.

FIND THE REST OF THE CHAPTERS HERE.

In the wake of Mattheo's cutting words, three days had passed--three seemingly endless days since he had slammed the door shut on your attempts to help him, his declaration of your connection being nothing more than a futile endeavour, one destined for ruin once the end of the school year rolled around still ringing in your ears like a haunting melody.

The echo of his harsh words reverberated within your mind, an incessant hologram with no escape, seeping into your thoughts during sleepless nights, intruding upon your attempts to focus on anything else. You weren't sure why those words had cut so fucking deep, because in the moment you'd hardly even flinched, but you couldn't ignore the lingering pain they caused.

And during those agonizing days, an uncomfortable tension settled between the two of you, hanging in the air like an unspoken truth. You took the hint, biting back the words that threatened to spill, choosing silence over confrontation. You trailed after him like a shadow in between classes, keenly aware that any attempt at conversation would only ignite another explosive clash, a battle neither of you felt prepared to wage again so soon.

The memory of your last argument lingered, its toxicity staining the air between you, leaving wounds too deep to heal without acknowledgment and remorse; two things neither of you seemed ready to give, quite yet.

But what really made matters worse, was that both of you were unyielding in your convictions--both of you shamelessly stubborn and unapologetic, neither of you feeling as though you were in the wrong. Mattheo barricaded himself behind walls, lashing out as if you were the enemy, despite your unwavering efforts to assist him--which, in turn, resulted in your pushiness. Your refusal to tolerate his aggression without challenge, became your armor, your way of standing your ground.

Maybe you had been too forceful, perhaps too harsh, but in your eyes, it was a response to the aggression he hurled your way. You couldn't simply let his hostility go unchecked; it was against your nature. And so, the standoff continued, a battle of wills and tempers, leaving both of you entrenched in your own convictions, neither of you willing to admit fault.

But today, you decided you weren't going to hide back anymore. You couldn't allow your stubbornness to completely destroy whatever progress you had made with Mattheo thus far. This was about more than just your pitiful feelings, or whatever emotions you had tied into the situation with that complicated boy. This was about being there for him, wether he wants you to be or not. Showing compassion and patience.

And so, summing newfound determination, you shook off the weight of your own melancholy and sought him out after dinner. Today, he and his group of friends had chosen the serene ambiance by the black lake as their study sanctuary, immersing themselves in the preparation for the upcoming charms exam next week.

Over the past three days, you had gradually grown somewhat acquainted with his friends. While you hadn't quite reached the level of camaraderie, there was a palpable shift in their attitudes towards you, a subtle warmth replacing the earlier distance. This change in dynamics became more evident, especially after the unsettling incident involving Berkshire, who still remained confined to the hospital wing, almost a week later.

With determined resolve, you traversed the courtyard and descended the hill toward the lake, drawing in a steadying breath. Each step echoed your silent promise: to honour Mattheo's boundaries, even if it felt like swallowing shards of glass. The crisp air seemed to echo your determination as you neared the group of Slytherin boys, their laughter and banter carried on the breeze.

Among them, Mattheo sat with his usual nonchalant demeanor, his tousled hair framing his intense eyes. A cigarette dangled effortlessly from his fingers, his bag slumped lazily beside him as he rested stoically against a tall tree, lost in conversation with Malfoy. As you veered closer, his gaze met yours briefly, as though he sensed your presence, the darkness within his eyes sending a shiver down your spine. Beside him, Blaise Zabini's face lit up with anticipation, a welcoming smile playing on his lips as he waved you over.

"Well good evening, little raven...always a pleasure," Blaise grinned, his tone teasing as he made room for you to sit down next to him. "Here to keep an eye on Riddle, are you?"

As you settled into the space between Blaise and Mattheo, the group of boys, including Theodore Nott, Draco Malfoy, and Regulus Black, welcomed you with light smiles and eager nods.

"Perhaps." You teased, sneaking a glance at Mattheo, his gaze planted on the cigarette between his fingers as he fiddled with it. "Or perhaps I'm here to make sure you lot don't burn down the entire forest during your little 'study session'..."

"Rest assured, we're Hogwarts' best-behaved troublemakers," Draco chuckled, his eyes glinting with mischief, a cocky smile playing on his lips. "But if you're worried about the forest, maybe you should stick around...your presence might just be the calming influence we need."

Your blush was undeniable as you smirked, meeting Draco's silver eyes across from Mattheo. He leaned back on his palms as his gaze darted over your features, the top buttons of his uniform shirt undone, exuding an air of effortless confidence.

"I know enough about you, Malfoy, to know that's the furthest thing from the truth," you said, your tone teasing. "But either way, I won't be going anywhere anytime soon...unfortunately for him, Riddle here is stuck with me for a few more weeks."

Blaise chuckled, his voice low and smooth. "Ah, the lucky bloke," he replied, his eyes meeting yours with a smouldering intensity. "If I had my way, you'd find yourself stuck with me, instead...and I assure you, it would be a much more enjoyable experience..."

You quirked an eyebrow. "Is that so?"

"Oh yes," he teased, his voice a playful melody as he shot Mattheo a knowing wink. "I know all too well the misery of enduring Riddle's icy presence all day; he could freeze a bloody dragon with that demeanor...it's almost cute that you think you'll be able to change him."

The timbre of his voice, a melodic dance of amusement, filled the space around you, and Mattheo's demeanor, once steely and composed, seemed to falter slightly under the weight of Blaise's remarks.

His features tightened, as if grappling with invisible chains, and your own smile, once confident, wavered slightly, betraying the impact of Blaise's words. Swallowing hard, you felt the weight of his teasing remarks settle in the pit of your stomach, a heavy reminder of the argument you and Mattheo had just a few days ago. Despite the discomfort, you summoned your courage, your voice soft yet resolute as you spoke.

"I'm not trying to change him, Blaise," your words hung in the air, delicate and firm, like a fragile thread of understanding. "I'm just here to support him...whenever he's ready to let me."

Your words lingered for a moment, underscoring your unwavering dedication to bolster Mattheo without imposing change upon his core. Although you were directing these words at Blaise, you hoped Mattheo had taken heed of them--as this mentorship, you understood now, was not about altering his identity; it was about assisting him in unraveling the internal struggles, urging him to redirect his anger into positive outlets rather than combatting every perceived threat with physical violence.

Blaise's eyes softened, his usual playful demeanor giving way to a more contemplative expression. He leaned in closer, his gaze scanning your features with a profound curiosity, as if searching for hidden depths within your soul. His voice, now tinged with awe and respect, broke the silence.

"Where have you been all this time, hm? He could have used someone like you years ago..." he murmured, his gaze shifting between you and Mattheo, a glint of intrigue shimmering in his dark eyes. "She must truly be something special for you to willingly sacrifice your freedom for her, Riddle."

"A special pain in my ass, yeah," Mattheo said, his voice seemingly devoid of emotion, a subtle hint of sarcasm lacing his words. As he took a draw of his cigarette, a flicker of annoyance flashed in his eyes, the smoke curling around him like a shield. "Nothing about this arrangement was willingly chosen, Zabini..."

Despite the gravity of his words, a rush of warmth surged within you at Mattheo's candid remark. Amusement sparked in your eyes, a glint of playful defiance as you tried to suppress a smirk that threatened to betray your composure.

"Don't let him fool you, he loves it..." your voice, low and teasing, hung in the air, the words daring and provocative as you shamelessly appraised Mattheo's hardened features. "Isn't that right, Riddle? You know you enjoy being kept on your toes for once..."

Mattheo met your gaze, his eyes narrowing slightly, but a flicker of amusement danced in their depths. Your boldness didn't go unnoticed, a silent understanding passing between you amidst the banter. With an air of nonchalance, he raised an eyebrow, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips as he brought his cigarette to his mouth once more.

"Yeah, that's what I enjoy," he drawled, his tone dry and drenched in sarcasm. "Being kept on my toes."

A rush of heat flooded your cheeks at Mattheo's sneakily playful words, your attempt to conceal your reaction falling short. Your eyes dropped to your lap, a feeble effort to shield your reddening face from the prying eyes around you. The charged words hung thick in the air, every gaze in the circle keenly aware of the subtle shift in dynamics. Before you could even think to react, Theodore Nott's voice, low and teasing, sliced through the tension, his eyes glinting with a playful gleam that hinted at secrets only he knew.

"Careful, Bella Mia..." he cautioned, his words hanging in the space between you, laden with enigmatic warnings. "You'll only get hurt."

Confusion knit your brows, a perplexed frown marring your features as you tried to decipher his cryptic statement.

"What?" you asked, your voice betraying your bewilderment.

"Your smile..." he replied with a knowing smirk, his tone light but filled with subtle implications, "...you look like you're about to fall in love."

The breath caught in your throat, the world around you momentarily blurring as Theodore's unexpected revelation hit you like a tidal wave. The color drained from your cheeks, leaving your face pale, and your heart thudded against your ribs with a fervent urgency, as if pleading for clarity. Flustered and unprepared, you turned your gaze toward Mattheo, seeking solace in his familiar presence.

Nervousness danced in your eyes, a desperate search for reassurance before you stammered out a denial, the words tumbling from your lips in a rush. "Fall...in love? With Mattheo? Sorry, no...no bloody way."

Your words spilled out in a hurried, almost desperate attempt to dispel the implication, yet there was an undeniable tremor in your voice, a subtle quiver that betrayed the unease settling deep within you. Mattheo's eyes met yours, but they held an emptiness, a haunting void that sent a shiver down your spine, something distant flickering within them, making your stomach twist in uneasy knots.

Around you, the group erupted into sneers and light chuckles, their amusement palpable as they sensed your flustered expression. But your attention remained fixated on Mattheo, his silent gaze carrying the weight of Theodore's words, a looming storm cloud hanging over your heads, heavy with unspoken implications.

In love. The notion seemed absurd, impossible even. No, it couldn't be true. There was no way.

"Nott's right, you'll only get hurt..." Malfoy's sneering voice cut through the air, his words laced with a malicious amusement as he cast a sideways glance at Theodore, who snickered in agreement. "You're far too innocent for Riddle... he'd chew you up and spit you out in a second...any of us would..."

He paused, his cold eyes darting from yours to Mattheo's, and back to yours again, as if sizing up the situation. A sly smirk played on his lips, the cruel glint in his eyes sharpening. "Well, perhaps not Notty boy here; he's a little softer."

A surge of heat coursed through your veins, igniting a fierce determination within you that contrasted sharply with the warm, gentle breeze caressing your skin. Despite the pressure weighing heavily upon you and the palpable weight of their expectations hanging in the air, you refused to succumb to their underestimation. With your pulse quickening, you squared your shoulders, locking eyes with Malfoy's cocky gaze.

"You know...I don't believe I'm as fragile as you all seem to think I am," you retorted, words laced with conviction, challenging their perception of you. "I can handle myself just fine."

"Don't let her appearance fool you," Mattheo's words, unexpectedly slicing through the charged atmosphere, nearly startled your heart out of your chest. His voice, dripping with playful irony, reverberated through your limbs as he spoke without even sparing you a glance, his dark hair framing his face and his whiskey eyes meeting Malfoy's with a challenging glint. "That pretty face hides one hell of a devilish mind."

A collective reaction rippled through the group of boys, their eyebrows shooting up in surprise, their smirks growing wider. The implications of Mattheo's remark hung thick in the air, sparking newfound curiosity and amusement that crackled in the atmosphere like electricity. Malfoy seized the opportunity, his smirk taking on a mischievous edge.

"Now you're calling her pretty, Riddle?" he teased, his tone laced with playful skepticism. "Are you sure there's nothing going on between you two? You have been spending a hell of a lot of time together..."

Simultaneously, you both shot back with lightening speed--your words colliding mid-air, overlapping with the others quick response in a chaotic symphony of denial.

"He wishes," you said, your voice carrying a playful edge--while at the same instant, Mattheo sneered, his tone dripping with sarcasm and wit. "In her bloody dreams," he said.

Your synchronized responses elicited another round of chuckles from the boys, a shared moment of camaraderie at the expense of you and Mattheo. The tension between the two of you remained, but the exchange had shifted into a playful rhythm, now, the unspoken dynamics between you two sparking curiosity among the others. Malfoy's chuckles gradually faded, replaced by a challenging glint in his eyes as he raised an eyebrow, a smirk curling his lips.

"Alright then...little good girl," he drawled, his tone laden with mischief. "Why don't you prove it?"

Your nerves prickled beneath your skin, a rush of anxiety coursing through your veins as you stammered, "Prove...it? Prove what?"

"Prove that you aren't as innocent and fragile as we think you are," he challenged, his words hanging in the air like a dare. "Prove that you're more than just your books and your pushy, smartass attitude."

Nervously, you glanced around the circle at each of the boys, their eyes fixed on you with wide grins of anticipation. The weight of their expectations pressed upon you, and you felt the intensity of the moment, wether you wished to ignore it or not. Mattheo didn't dare to meet your gaze, but you could sense the slight smirk playing on his lips as he casually fiddled with his cigarette. After a long, silent moment, you took a deep breath, steeling yourself for what was to come.

"Fine, Malfoy," you said, your voice steady despite the fluttering in your chest. "Challenge excepted."

With determination, you pushed off the ground, turning your attention away from the circle and toward the tranquil expanse of the black lake. The challenge had been accepted, and you were ready to prove that there was more to you than met the eye, ready to do whatever the hell you needed to earn their respect in your own damned way.

The boys surrounding you stared in wide-eyed shock as you swiftly shrugged off your uniform jacket, the soft fabric falling carelessly to the grassy ground. With a quick motion, you kicked off your shoes, the blades of grass tickling your feet beneath the fading sunlight--it was dark enough now that if you moved away from them, toward the edge of the lake, and stripped off your skirt and shirt, they wouldn't be able to see too much. Nevertheless, they'd still catch glimpses, and that was precisely the point.

Mattheo, still seated, shot you a puzzled look, his eyes narrowing with sheer confusion and concern.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he questioned, his voice slicing through the stunned silence. The weight of his gaze bore into you, searching for an explanation that might justify your unexpected actions. A surge of confidence pushed you forward, your resolve unwavering.

"I'm going to prove that I'm more than what you all think," you replied, your voice steady despite the adrenaline coursing through your veins. "And that sometimes, good girls do bad things, too."

Theodore Nott, always one to read the room, glanced between you and Mattheo, a sly smile playing on his lips. "This should be interesting," he murmured, his tone laced with amusement. "Salazar save us..."

With a newfound sense of liberation, you descended toward the tranquil lake, the gentle lapping of water against the shore a soothing melody in the background. The soft rustle of the wind caressed your ears, heightening the anticipation that hung thick in the air. As you began to undo the buttons on your uniform blouse, each delicate movement resonated with the weight of the challenge, setting your heart racing in your chest.

With every button that slipped out, the tension in the atmosphere grew palpable, the burning gazes of the captivated boys etched into your flesh. The fabric of your blouse glided off your shoulders, landing gracefully on the grass like a discarded shield at your feet. Standing there, clad in nothing but your bra and skirt, you felt a heady mix of exhilaration and vulnerability wash over you.

As the cool evening air enveloped your skin, you sensed a presence behind you. Slowly, you peeked over your shoulder to find Mattheo sprinting toward you, his brows furrowed in disbelief and his eyes widened in pure shock. He came to a halt just a few feet away, his voice laden with a mixture of astonishment and genuine concern.

"Have you lost your bloody mind?" he exclaimed, his words a sharp contrast to the stunned silence that had fallen over the group. "You're going to fucking freeze..."

His gaze flickered over you, a kaleidoscope of emotions playing in his eyes, the dominant one undeniably being shock, tinged with a hint of something else--something unspoken and complex. Under the intensity of his stare, you felt a rush of warmth suffuse your skin, a bold defiance kindling within you as your hands moved to the band of your skirt. With deliberate slowness, you teased the length of its waist, holding his eyes captive in a daring challenge.

"What's the matter, Riddle?" you purred, savoring the power in the moment, knowing he couldn't physically intervene in front of his friends without arousing suspicion. "Are you truly worried about me?" Your voice dropped into a low, nearly inaudible whisper as your smirk deepened, relishing the way his eyes tracked your hands. "Or...perhaps...you're just unable to handle other men looking at your property..."

Mattheo's frustration was palpable, his brows furrowing as he struggled to maintain his composure. Yet, beneath the annoyance, there was a glimmer of amusement, a reluctant acknowledgment of your audacity.

"You're playing with fire, again, aren't you?" he muttered, his tone a blend of exasperation and begrudging amusement. A wry smile tugged at the corner of his lips, a hint of admiration for your boldness despite the irritation simmering beneath the surface. "Just be careful you don't get burned."

"Oh, please," you retorted, unable to contain your smirk, the confidence in your voice echoing your daring spirit. "Witches don't burn."

With a swift, decisive motion, you cast your skirt aside, the fabric pooling on the grass as you dashed toward the lake with unbridled determination. Adrenaline coursed through your veins, dulling the edge of the initial shock as you plunged into the cold water. A sharp gasp cut through the night as the icy embrace of the lake stole your breath away, the shock of the temperature quickly giving way to exhilaration. In the background, the boys erupted into cheers and hollers, their admiration for your audacious leap resonating in the crisp evening air like a chorus of approval.

Meanwhile, at the shore, Mattheo stood half-stunned, his eyes widening in surprise before that sly smirk slowly crept back onto his face. He watched you with a mix of amusement and something else, something that look almost like an undeniable respect for your audacity. His fingers absently toyed with his cigarette as he observed your fearless actions, his usual stoic demeanor momentarily shattered by your bold act.

From the water, you observed the boys exchanging glances, their smirks hinting at a shared understanding that transcended words. With an unspoken agreement, they shrugged in unison, a collective "fuck it" echoing through the air. One by one, they rose to their feet, shedding their uniforms with carefree abandon until they stood just as exposed as you were. Their toned bodies glistened under the evening sky, the moonlight filtering through the clouds, casting a silvery glow upon their skin.

With lively laughter echoing through the night air, the boys sprinted toward you, their infectious excitement palpable even from a distance. They effortlessly brushed past Mattheo, who stood frozen in place, his expression a mosaic of shock and amusement, his eyes tracking each of his friends as they leaped into the water alongside you. As the cold water embraced them, the boys couldn't help but groan in unison, their playful complaints filling the air.

"Bloody hell, it's freezing..." Reggie exclaimed, eliciting chuckles from the others. “How the fuck did I think this was a good idea…”

Amidst the banter, they turned their attention to you, their expressions a blend of awe and admiration.

"You've definitely surprised us, little bird," Theodore teased, his tone laced with genuine respect. "Making this look so easy, aren't you?"

Malfoy's voice echoed with a mix of amusement and challenge as he shouted across the water to Mattheo.

"Riddle, don't be a killjoy," he taunted, a playful glint in his eyes. "I know you can't resist a good challenge...you're really going to let little raven here outshine you like this?”

The words hung in the air, a tempting dare that Mattheo couldn't ignore. He stood at the water's edge, his expression a mixture of hesitation and a playful grumbling--clearly debating whether to join the revelry or stay put. You grinned as you watched, his face sporting a resigned yet amused expression, as he finally succumbed, muttering under his breath as he peeled off his uniform with deliberate slowness.

"You guys are bloody mad," he grumbled as he folded his clothes neatly on the shore, his movements deliberate and slightly begrudging. "If we catch hypothermia, Raven, I'm blaming you."

Finally, with a sarcastic salute and a roll of his eyes, he took a deep breath and dove into the water, his entry marked by a splash that mirrored the energy and excitement of the night, everyone erupting into laughter at his little display. Mattheo waded over, his playful irritation evident in the way he shot you a mock glare before unleashing a playful splash, water droplets scattering in all directions.

"Mattheo!" You squealed, wiping the water from your face. "You bloody arse!"

His eyes twinkled with mischief, and he couldn't help but smirk as you retaliated, sending a splash of water right back at him. The tension from earlier had transformed into a playful energy, the group now engaged in a water fight, laughter filling the air as splashes and giggles and squeals intermingled.

Before you knew it, everyone was caught up in the spirited frenzy, water splashing in every direction as the boys chased each other, their playful shouts and laughter blending harmoniously. Mattheo, who had initially been the reluctant participant, seemed to revel in the chaos, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he retaliated with gusto, no longer holding back.

As the water fight intensified, you noticed Mattheo momentarily distracted, his attention diverted by the antics of the other boys. Seizing the opportunity, you discreetly gathered a handful of mud from the lakebed, forming it into a small, compact ball. With careful precision, you approached him from behind, your steps silent in the water, and with a swift motion, you lobbed the mud ball, aiming for Mattheo's shoulder.

The ball hit its mark perfectly, leaving a satisfying splatter of mud on his skin, the boys erupting into laughter, thoroughly entertained by your clever move. However, turning around, Mattheo's eyes widened in exaggerated shock, his voice tinged with playful hurt.

"Did you just fucking ambush me? In front of my own men?" he exclaimed, his tone laced with feigned betrayal as he theatrically wiped the mud off his skin. “You’re real fucking bold, aren’t you, Raven?”

You snickered, grinning at the fact you’d caught him off guard like that. “You know what they say…never drop your guard, Mattheo…”

A mischievous glint sparked in his eyes as he casually glanced over your shoulder, spotting Theodore wading in the water behind you and Malfoy standing just a bit to your side. A subtle shift occurred in Mattheo's demeanor, a silent understanding passing between him, Theodore, and Malfoy. Their eyes exchanged a knowing look, a shared sense of mischief darkening their expressions. Mattheo's voice, once filled with mock hurt, now dripped with wicked amusement as he issued his command.

"Grab her, boys," he ordered, his voice taking on a sinister edge, setting the stage for the impeding revenge. "Time to show the little bird what happens when you mess with a bunch of venomous snakes."

Excitement surged through your veins, a thrilling concoction of adrenaline and laughter, as you attempted to evade their grasp. Your heart raced, the pounding in your chest echoing the playful chaos around you. Despite your best efforts, Theodore's fingers wrapped firmly around your arm, and Malfoy's grip held your other, their strength ensuring your playful struggles were in vain.

“Come on, Mattheo!” You squirmed and giggled, a delightful blend of resistance and amusement, as you found yourself caught in their playful trap. “I’m sorry, please…”

Mattheo, his confidence soaring now that you were being successfully restrained, seized a hefty clump of mud, his fingers sinking into its cool, squishy texture. As he spun back around, his eyes locked onto yours, and with deliberate measured steps, he closed the distance between you, his movements exuding a cocky swagger that only intensified your anxiety.

"Any last words, Raven?" he taunted, his voice dripping with playful malice, the echoes of your impending fate resonating in the air like a looming storm. "If you wish to pathetically apologize for that ignorant display, now is the time to do so."

"Mattheo, please!" Desperation and regret flooded your voice, your pleas tumbling out in a desperate rush, mingling with the tension that hung heavy in the air. "I'm so sorry, please don't--I didn't mean to-"

But Mattheo merely shook his head, a triumphant smirk curving his lips, dismissing your words with a casual flick of his hand.

"Actually, just decided it's too late for ass-kissing now, princess," he sneered, his words cutting through the air like a sharp blade. "Brace yourself."

With a swift motion, he hurled the mud at you, the clump splattering against your chest. Laughter erupted from the boys, their camaraderie deepening in the chaos of the moment. And you, caught in their playful trap, couldn't help but join in the laughter, realizing that the evening had taken an unexpected turn, transforming into a memorable, joyous escapade under the moonlit sky.

As the boys finally released their grip, laughter still lingering in the air, Mattheo met your eyes, his gaze dipping over your mud-splattered form with a mix of amusement and something else you couldn't quite decipher.

Grumbling, you couldn't resist a playful jab, "You're such an ass."

His chuckle transformed into a self-assured grin, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Guilty as charged," he admitted, his voice teasing. "But you have to admit, it was worth it for that look on your face."

You let out a reluctant chuckle, realizing the absurdity of the situation. "Fine, you win this round," you conceded, unable to suppress a smile. "But don't get too comfortable; next time I'm bringing everything I got."

"I'm counting on it," Mattheo replied with a grin, a spark of anticipation in his eyes, acknowledging the challenge you had just thrown his way. “Wouldn’t be normal for you if you didn’t.”

After a little bit longer, the group of you finally emerged from the water, the stars twinkling overhead like diamonds scattered across the night sky. Laughter and playful groans of annoyance filled the air as you all struggled to peel your clothes back on, the urgency to get back to the castle evident in the chilly breeze that swept through the night.

With clothes clinging damply to your skin, you all made your way back, sharing stories and laughter along the path. The atmosphere was light, the shared escapade having created a bond among you, making the cold night feel a little warmer. As you approached the castle, a sense of accomplishment and newfound friendship enveloped the group, and you couldn't help but feel a thrill at the unexpected turn the night had taken, leaving you with a memory of an exhilarating adventure under the starlit sky.

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Chapter 23->

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unforth · 5 months

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I had a day off yesterday.

And I can already practically hear the assumptions that such a statement is prompting the reader to make. Those assumptions are wrong. I don't mean I didn't work. I did, for about 8 hours. That's not at all what I mean.

I mean my wife took the kids out at 9:30, spent the night with her mom, isn't back yet the next morning.

There are things I NEED people on this website to understand about parenting. And I've talked about it before, and I'll talk about it again, because honestly the way that Tumblr as a cohort talks about parents makes me sick. Multiple polls have shown that only about 2% of people on here are parents. We're a huge minority, and we're constantly talked over, ignored, or accused of being bad parents (like, personally, I have had people reply to my comments or come on to my posts and tell me I shouldn't have my kids). In my case, being a parent means I'm almost 41, I'm married to @ramblingandpie, and our children are inching up on being 8 and 6 years old.

My entire day, and therefore my entire life, revolves around them. I'm up most mornings at 5 AM, because that's the earliest they're "allowed" to wake up, and so my brain just defaults to being awake around then - better to wake up before them, at least then I get a few minutes in the morning. Between 5 and 7, I sit with them, do my social media, work on side blogs, study Chinese. Then it's helping them get ready for school, then my wife or I or both get them on the bus, and then I work until the last possible minute, which is either when I need to go pick them up for an after school activity or when I need to go down and meet them off the bus. My afternoons are after school activities, chores such as washing the dishes and cleaning up toys, talking with them, working with them, playing with them. Their bedtime starts at 7:40, and my son gets scared if I leave before he falls asleep so I sit with him until about 8:15. As soon as he's asleep, I go fall on my face, sleep as best I can, then wake up and do it again. Overnight, it's hard to sleep deeply, because about once a week someone will wake up in the middle of the night and need help. That could be as minimal as a hug or as complex as having to completely change the bedding on a bunk bed at 2 AM while also comforting a child who is afraid they'll be in trouble, or afraid they're sick, or afraid of their nightmare, or, or, or. Further, if a child is awake, there is always noise. I usually study Chinese with two or more competing sources of noise. I read the same way. My life is loud, and active, and consists of constant interruptions.

I adore my family, and I love my children, but this is terrible for me.

I do all of this as an neurodivergent introvert. My clinical depression is at least medicated, mostly because post-partum depression after I gave birth the first time nearly drove me to suicidal in under a week (we were expecting this and were prepared, fortunately, getting help was as simple as a phone call). The constant noise and interruptions and forced socialibility are about the worst combination of home-life I could be subjected to. I spend far too many early mornings just breathing deeply and gearing myself up to be subjected to the wall of Loud, Boisterous, Needing-My-Attention that is every minute when anyone else in the house is awake.

So what did my day off look like?

I helped get the kids ready to go and did some morning chores. I'd been up at 4:30 AM so I also had already social media'd and studied. Then, while my wife finished the preparations, I started work, and I worked from about 8 am to about 4 pm, straight. I didn't get hungry so didn't bother stopping for lunch. No one interrupted me, no one asked me to look at anything they'd built, no one broke my concentration, no sounds could be heard except those I'd chosen myself.

I'd been out the day before at a local shopping street and listened closely to the things the kids said they wanted, so at 4 I grabbed a couple orders I needed to ship for work and drove to our local downtown, dropped the orders in a post box, then went back to the shops and did some Christmas shopping in the 45 minutes or so before everything closed. I think I'm basically done with what we'll get them - other bigger things will be left to grand parents - so that's a load off, I literally had a stress dream earlier this week about it being 12/24 and having forgotten to do the shopping and having to go to (oh horrors) the mall on the day before Christmas. (Reminder: I'm a Jewish atheist. It's just virtually impossible not to Holiday in the Culturally Christian Hellscape that is the US. Also, my wife is Christian. So.) Found something cute for my wife, too, even tho I already know the main thing I'm getting her. Then, I realized - one of my favorite restaurants is on that block. So. I went there. I sat by myself at a table, only the indistinct restaurant hubbub around me. I read four or five chapters of my book, and ate a savory crepe, and drank lovely fruit tea, and got a scone to-go that I'll eat for lunch today. It was more than I probably should have spent on myself - about $25, including tip - but fuck it. I only get maybe a handful of days off all year, and I'm allowed to indulge a little.

Then I came home. There were no lights on. There was no noise. I had considered doing some more merch work while watching TV on the actual television (my kids are too young for subtitled shows, so usually if I want to watch My Shows I either have to do it on my computer when they're not around, or put them on and read all the subtitles aloud while trying to keep up and process the actual meaning of what I'm reading). But when I got back, the quiet and dark was so goddamn NICE that instead I curled up on the couch and read more of my book. I did that until bedtime - still about 8:15, because I'm exhausted. Then...I went to bed. And I slept long and deep, knowing that there was no chance I'd be interrupted and woken up, I didn't have to be, even in sleep, alert to every noise and possibility that I'd be needed.

I'm still exhausted and burned out, but even one night to myself felt really, really nice.

Saying "Tumblr does X" as a universal statement is doomed to failure, but generally speaking, the parenting posts I see on Tumblr, the ones with tens or hundreds of thousands of notes, speak what's apparently widely seen as a truism on here: that unless someone wants to spend 24/7 with their kids, to be 100% emotionally available at all times, is always kind and patient and perfect, they are a bad parent, maybe even abusive. I remember when covid started, there were multiple posts actively mocking the "oh god, my kids are now home all the time, how am I supposed to do this?" attitude that a lot of parents posted in despair. WhY dId YoU hAvE kIdS iF yOu DoN't WaNt To SpEnD tImE wItH tHeM?

Look at what my usual day looks like.

Look at what my day off looked like.

Do you really think I don't want to spend time with my kids? Do you really think I don't love my kids?

But I'm not a fucking MACHINE. I'm a PERSON. That's what people on Tumblr seem to forget. PARENTS ARE PEOPLE. The same tumblrinas who post ~uwu be kind to yourself rest if you need to, you should forgive yourself for that mistake you made~ will turn around, with zero sense of irony, and post "you're a bad parent if you ever raise your voice around a child."

Expecting parents to be perfect means expecting parents to be inhuman. It also means that a parent can't be poor (can't spend all your time being the perfect parent if you have to work multiple jobs or weird hours!), can't be introverted (can't be a perfect parent if you're not completely emotional available, god forbid socializing is exhausting for you), can't be on the ADHD or autism spectrum (what do you mean you forgot to get your kid to a doctor's appointment once? what do you mean over-stimulation can make you angry? how dare you get angry at a kid!), can't be depressed (gotta get out of bed every single day, gotta always be upbeat, patient, happy, or else that's Evil), can't be (like my wife) physically disabled (what do you mean your hands hurt too much to hold a child's hand? are you denying them touch?? CRUEL). And when the only answer you can offer to that is, "if you can't be that perfect you shouldn't be a parent," then you're saying people who aren't middle class to wealthy, people who aren't neurotypical, people who aren't physically able, shouldn't have children.

And honestly...what the fuck is your problem?

I'm not perfect. I tell my kids to just leave me alone sometimes. I raise my voice, especially when one of my kids starts punching the other, but also sometimes just cause I'm exhausted and Can't Anymore. I've forgotten an appointment by accident and felt like a total fucking idiot, and I've skipped an after school activity because I just wasn't up for taking them. I've served them more unbalanced, unhealthy meals than I can count. I've made many, many mistakes, but I've also done my best, and I love my kids, and I hope that when they grow up, they'll still love me even as they recognize that I wasn't perfect, just as I've come to accept my own parents' short-comings while still loving them very much. They're people, too, and the older I get, the more I understand where they were coming from.

When I fuck up, I apologize.

When they tell me they're unhappy with something I've done, I apologize, and I try to do better. Sometimes I even succeed.

This shit is hard, yo. And it's getting harder every year.

I'm BEGGING Tumblr: you need to start seeing parents as people. The way y'all talk about parenting on here is toxic, and genuinely harmful, and frankly exhausting. You have no idea what the reality of raising kids is like, and you need to shut the entire fuck up.

I had a day off yesterday.

I might get one more before the end of 2023.

I already can't wait. I am so, so, so tired. sigh

(if you actually read this whole rant and even a single word of it resonated for you, please reblog it. I'm tired of never seeing positive posts about parenting while I see negative ones with a bajillion notes.)

#unforth rambles #parenting #momblr #nothing prompted this #i just think about writing posts like this all the time #because the low-level background buzz of how much tumblr hates parents is a constant stressor tbh #and every once and a while i tip over the line end up Writing the Thing #and so here we are again #god i have so much to do today and instead i procrastinate with this #oops

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mochinomnoms · 7 months

Text

The Private (not) Thoughts of a Moray Chapter 1: I wonder if you look both ways (when you cross my mind)

Gender Neutral Reader x Jade Leech

Chapter 1 preview:

“Henchman? Are you okay?” “…Yeah, thanks guys, I didn’t realize how sick I was getting… this magic thing is hard.” Snorting at your whiny tone, Ace still looked at you with a bit of sympathy. “It’s that telepathy stuff that’s the problem right? Not magic!” “Although,” Grim spoke up, left your arms and stood on the step instead. “That could just be a unique magic thing, right?” “Yeah! Though it’s basically impossible for someone to have a unique magic active all the time…” Deuce rubbed the back of his head, looking at you frustrated. “You’d probably be blotting, maybe it’s something else?”

[wc} - 3,699

back to chapter list

A year ago today, you, Y/N, entered Twisted Wonderland with nothing but the clothes on your back, a rotting, haunted dormitory, and a fire-breathing cat creature. You were but a mere human with no magic to defend yourself with and no way to return to your home. Today, after months of sweat, tears, blood and 7 consecutive overblots, you have become known as the infamous prefect.

It was a title well-deserved for the human that survived the overblots of several powerful mages, especially in the case of your dearest, Hornton (you still called him that even now, he seemed to like it). But it ended surprisingly well, with minimal casualties to the students and to the overblotters. You really should give thanks to the Seven for that.

Though it’s really less impressive than it sounds out loud, as without the help of your fellow freshman, Ace and Deuce, Jack, Epel, Sebek, and even Grim, it wouldn’t have been possible, as you still remain mostly magicless.

Mostly.

Despite the mirror declaring you “empty”, and though it was true for most of your time at NRC, it seems that your extended stay has slowly granted you an affinity for magic. At the rate you’re learning at though, you can mostly cast small spells, like light spells in the dark, and small healing spells courtesy of Nurse Goethel.

You personally found it pretty impressive that you could cast spells now, though the one time you mentioned as much, Ace insisted that you were the equivalent of a little kid proudly showing off a shitty stick figure drawing of their family.

You choose to view that as a family endearingly encouraging their kid’s budding artistic streak!

Besides, that wasn’t your only budding ability, as you noticed during the graduation ceremony for the seniors. The freshman, per tradition, were in charge of the concession stands before the graduation ceremony. From what Crowley told your class, this was to help build character and build financial literacy, for he was a generous headmage that prepared his students for the real world.

You, of course, knew that it was probably just because it was cheaper than hiring someone.

Here you, Grim, and your 6 fellow classmates worked at a booth outside the coliseum, currently selling bouquets and garlands to the graduates’ families. Soon enough, the conversation shifted to summer plans.

“Ahh~ I’m super excited to go home! My family’s gonna go to the beach! I'm so looking forward to seeing hot babes!”

“Of course you are Ace,” Jack sighed. “I’m just looking forward to some cooler weather back home.”

Deuce looked over as he adjusted the garlands, Heartslabyul-styled, in his hands, “It’s gonna suck being alone on campus for the next three months. Are you sure you don’t want to spend summer break with one of us?”

“Ehhh? I didn’t say anything like that!” Ace scoffed. “Don’t lump me in with you, Juice!”

“Don’t be rude, Ace!”

“Deuce is right! Y/N! We have room at my home, Meemaw- I mean, Grandma -would be happy to have you!” Epel piped up from behind the booth. “And I’d finally have someone my age with me in town.”

You smiled as your fellow incoming second-years bickered amongst themselves. Jack looked exasperated at the Adeuce’s arguing, as he usually did. On the other hand, Epel was blatantly ignoring the two as he looked at you with puppy eyes, embracing his cuteness (just this once) to convince you to join him home.

“Cease your arguing! It is unbefitting of you as soon to be upperclassmen to a new class of students!” Sebek barked, looking quite silly as Grim laid on top of his head, a scene that would’ve been impossible two months ago.

“Nyah! Quiet down, you’re even louder when I’m on top of your head!”

“Mm-hm, I appreciate the concern--Grim get off him--but I can’t,” You grabbed Grim from Sebek, who leaned down to your head to help. “Crowley’s giving me a bigger allowance if I stay to care for the fairies again.”

Grim curled himself in your arms as he pouted. “The cafeteria and school store are gonna be closed again! How am I gonna get my premium tuna from Sam now?!”

“Don’t whine about something so trivial! Prefect, are you sure you don’t want to spend at least a weekend with me and my Mom?” Deuce asked you once again.

“Ah, I’d have to ask if the ghosts could cover, but a weekend should be fine, but we’d better get back to the concessions.”

“Right you are, human! We should be celebrating the graduation of our upperclassmen!”

Jack winced at Sebek’s increasing volume, “Lower your voice, Sebek. It’s already too loud with the crowd as it is.”

Wincing alongside him, you rubbed your temples as the noise from the crowd grew with the number of attendees. You'd expect a graduation to be a busy event with loud crowds, but that was before you could hear everyone’s thoughts as well.

It’d started off slow, just after the last overblot, with soft whispers floating in your mind like will-o-wisps in a dark forest. They grew, as fire does, with those whispers becoming more and more prominent. Soon you could hear your classmates daydreams, worries, and secrets, like the soft crackle from a campfire. It wasn’t like you could control it though, each little fire from your peers grew together to become one large, blazing wildfire. In the forest of your mind, one unprepared for any sort of magical blaze, it tore through you, leaving your mind burned and throbbing from the endless feed of thoughts.

I can’t believe it’s the end of the year already!

Ah! Damn they’re loud…

Geez, Mom, stop embarrassing me, it’s my graduation…

Make it stooooop!

Maybe I should stop for a graduation garland. Would he want an NRC one or Savanaclaw one?

Pleeeease… it hurrrts!

a͔̱ͪ̓̅ͅw ͚͚̜̈́ͮ̾mán,̧ i̷̞̼ ͉͕̟͛̉ͦw̡̭̩͚͒̀̓ḁ̖͎s̶͍̻̩̉́͂ h̠o̒҉͕ṗ̭i̯ͦn͙̒g ̭̱͆ͥt̸o͕̟̫ ̤̓s̸e͉e̦̮̞͟ ̶̑͗h͏͖̠ï̪̻͓ͦ̎m̹̺̼̐͛̆ ̴̻̟̞ḅ͚efͪ͐̕o̖ͅr̦ͧḙ̹ ́ţ͔ͨh̲ͤḙͪ ̼̦̀ć͖er͓̝͕̀̓͐̕em͙͚̑̈́ȏ̟͍̹̓̓n̢̔͐͌y ̡̺ŝ͌̒t̶̪͂ąrt̞ͧeͬͫd̷

It hurts!!!

s̩̝̝ͪ̄̈h̦͉̱̰̾ͬ̄̾i̴͍̹̅͗t̬̬͇̙̳ͅ ̠̫͙̼̯͐̓ͫ͌̒ĭ͕̗͔̺̍̎̑m̛ ̱̣̗̠r͗ͧǜ͉n n͢i̴̫͐ng̵ͅ ͇ḻ̬͙̠͋͆͆ͬa̹̬͚̺̯̯͔t̔̋ͨ̋ͬ̑e̖̹͚͓͖͚̙̅̌̉��̌̉ͭ,̢͉͚ ̟̺̄ͦȉ̹͟ ̴͙̫̿ͫh̻͓ͨͦo͛͛̊̂̂̿ͯp̪̙̠̬̗ͣͤͪ̎̆͘e i͚̝͇̲̜̠ͣ̐͌̑̓̋ ͘c̉ͧ͌̓͂ a̳͚̐̚n̤̰̖̮̘͍͖͂͋ͧͯͫ̈̒ ̩͊g̷ͦͯ̈́̿̆̊̾e̴͖̙̲̮̦̰̮̽ͨ̑͌̉̿̅t͉̳̯̙ a ́̄̌ͦ s̈́̏́͟e̝͇̮ͥ͋̀ḁ̯̼̪̮̅̌̓ͩͥ̚ͅt̰̝ͥ̏ ͕̰͇͚͝

what up w ẅ̰̗̠͇͛͗̓h͇̱̥̔̈̽a̮͓t ̛̦̜͓͔̒ͧ͑̈u̽ͧ̓ͨ̾̐͝p̢ ̫͓wì̹͉̹̮t̰̪̝̞hͦ̐ͬ ͐̿th̋̇ͪ̃̊̈̇͏̠̜̯̤̝̯͉e ̴̯͎̦ͨ͐ͩp̅ͤ͆r̠͙̂̔e̥͑͡f́ë͈̭͍́̇ͬct?̧͙̭̥̞͎̬̠ make it stop!! ȁ͍̘̝̩̄̂̿̐ͅw͇̪̯̥͕̞͚ ̧̭͍͕̼͈͕́̓̋̉̀̒̾ͅmàn͖̝͍̻̹̈͐̐̎̏ ̴ ṯ͇̭͕̼̏̉ͧ͒ͥh͏e̘̠̜͔̖̓̃̑͑̅y͓̣͙̭̤͔̘ͤ̎͂ͫ͛ͩͯ'̸̘̖̺̤̿̇̿̌r̬̰̮̩̜̞̫e͕̠̯̤ͧ̆̌̾ ̳̝͈̞̔͂̅̃l̯̘̻̖͔̝o̤̺̽͐o̪k͖̼̼̝̜̬i̙͕͙̯͈ͪ̆ͦ́̿̌ͅn̥̯͔̗̼ͅg͙̞͓͉͕̽͑ͦͭ͋ ̺͙̻̩̏͆̈́͊k͕͓̣̫͙̖̝i n̩͕̂̎͝d̵̞͖̘̦̳̟̺͂̂ͣ̑ͯͫ̇a ̛͈̺̲̥͉̮͇ͫ̎ͩ͋̍͛͗ s̮͍̘͎̼͔̥ĭ̑ͮ͑͂c̢̪̠k͇̜̾̆.̜̳̘͔̟̙.̦̦̎̓.̹̀̄ͅ stooooop! Ÿ̳̼̱͚̱̹́̈͊͒̅̋̀/͌͢N̠̳̠̰̖̜̻ͤ̋ͪ͒̒̋̆?̣̯͖͖̫̥͒̌̂ͣ̆̚

Iş̘̭̺̱͇̖ͧ͛̀̉ͭ̏̚ͅ ̷̜͍̩͈̹̻̥̋́̋͆ͣ̃̚t̼͐hȅ̋̊̉̑ ͍̺͇ STOP IT!!!!! h̖̳͜ͅu͌ͬ̅͆͊͑́҉͈͓̭̮̲̥͓m̹̟̟͇͚a͎̳͉̗̟̳n̥̘͈͚̫̣͉͊̾͗̏̃ͥ̿ ̝ͧg͎̅ő̳͔̖̞̄ͣ́n̪̰͈̝̙̣͕̆ͥ̄ͮ͒ͤͬṉ̖͕̍ͯ̚å̡̼̪͔͍ͦͣ̚ ̒̆͞p̯̝ǔ͙k͎͎̪̜͇͔͒́̉ͨ̓̏e̷̞̺̖?̯̘̻

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

H͇͖̱̪͘e͇͍̲͍̺͈ͅnc̟̘̘̟͖̎̐͊ͧ̅́ḣ̋ͦm̪̚ḁ̟͍͓̻n͊͘?̬͙ͣ͛

“Y/N?”

You felt soft purring against your chest, where you had been clutching Grim tighter to your chest as you hyperventilated. Grim pressed his head against your chin in an attempt to comfort you as tears flowed from your eyes. You could still feel your head pounding when Ace and Deuce approached with concern.

“You don’t look too good Prefect, do you need to take a breather?”

“Deuce is right, come on let's take you back to the dorm!” Ace placed a hand on the small of your back and began leading you away from the crowd. “See ya later guys!”

“Hey! You can’t just skip out of work like that!”

“Trappola! Get back here!”

“H-hey wait! Deuce, give back the garlands!”

Ace continued walking as Deuce ran back to hand Epel the products in his hands. “Oh sorry can’t hear you from here, Prefect is super sick, gotta blast~”

Leading into your friend, you let him guide you to your dorm, Deuce catching up to you as well. While it was still relatively packed along Main Street, even with the ceremony starting soon, the crowds dispersed as you two headed closer to the dorm.

Ah man, the line at Sam’s is super long. Maybe I can cut in somewhere?

Oh look at the Great Seven! Wait, that one’s an actual lion?

The botanical garden is closed! Nooo, I was gonna confess there before we left for internships!!

As the four of you approached to the dorm, you visibly relaxed as both the voices and thoughts of the crowds quieted down.

“Hey, we’re here,” Said Deuce, relaxing slightly as you approached the gate to Ramshackle. “You wanna just sit out here for a bit? The weather’s not too bad.”

You nodded and relaxed as you and your friends sat on the stone steps of the dorm, taking a deep breath as only the faintest of voices made their way to your head. From this far away, it made for a more pleasant ambience, like those YouTube “study with me” videos you’d put on for studying back home.

“Henchman? Are you okay?”

“... Yeah, thanks guys, I didn’t realize how sick I was getting… this magic thing is hard.”

Snorting at your whiny tone, Ace still looked at you with a bit of sympathy. “It’s that telepathy stuff that’s the problem right? Not magic!”

“Although,” Grim spoke up, left your arms and stood on the step instead. “That could just be a unique magic thing, right?”

“Yeah! Though it’s basically impossible for someone to have a unique magic active all the time…” Deuce rubbed the back of his head, looking at you frustrated. “You’d probably be blotting, maybe it’s something else?”

You snorted at his comment, drawing strange looks from them.

“You could’ve just said I’m weird. It’s a well known fact at this point.” Sighing dramatically, you threw yourself down to lay on the steps with your wrist resting on your forehead, tossing back your head for extra effect.

“Magic or not, I, the Ramshackle Prefect, will always be the strange little human! Whether it’s the strange human with no magic, or the strange human with weird…uh…mind magic!” You heard him snort. “I, alas, remain a spectacle!”

Rolling his eyes, Ace flicked your forehead (“Ow! Ace what the fuck!”) at your dramatics and sighed.

“You know, I was joking earlier. You can join me—or Deuce, I guess (“Hey!”)—during the break. We’re not all-knowing like a certain housewarden friend of yours, but we can help you figure out what's up with you.”

So far, only Ace, Deuce, and Grim knew about your newfound ability. And while it was the thought that counted, neither really knew anything about spontaneously gaining magical abilities. In fact, no one, not Crowley or even Hornton, really knew what to make of your new powers. Adding telepathy on top of the mix seemed like a good path to trouble. In the meantime, you found it best to keep it between you four, even if you felt bad leaving your other three friends out of the loop.

I bet my brother can help us figure out something, he works at a pretty swanky university back home!

You sighed and adjusted yourself so that you laid on your side, Grim curling up to you as you looked up at your friends. Ace sat a few steps down, so he could stretch his arm alongside your back, while Deuce laid his head on your waist.

Almost a year's worth of life-threatening fiascos have led to your closeness to your dearest friends, and Ace’s casual PDA with you and Deuce certainly helped bring your little group close together.

“I’m not gonna ask that of you, as much as I appreciate it.”

Why not? “My mom would love to have you over! It’d be no issue!” We could meet up with Ace and go to a library or something.

“That’s not the point Deuce,” You responded. “I just want to be able to do things on my own, and do you and Ace even live close enough to do that? Isn’t the Queendom pretty big?”

What? He didn’t mention me. Ace made a face at you as you answered. “Are you reacting to his thoughts?” Man that’s kinda creepy.

“Shut up, Ace.” Sorry… “I’m not trying to be creepy!”

Deuce smacked his side. “Don’t call them creepy!” Don’t be rude, Ace!

“Ya, what he said, don’t be rude!”

“He didn’t even say anything out loud!”

You blew a raspberry at him, the other Heartslabyul student snickering at his exasperated look.

You’re lucky you’re both cute…and stop laughing at me Deuce!

Grin widening, and migraine fading, you wiggled your eyebrows at Ace.

“Oh~ you think we’re cute? Deuce, he thinks we’re cuties!”

Eh? Me cute?

“Okay! That’s definitely not fair! Shut your mouth now before you spill all my secrets!” Ace grabbed at you as he tried to cover your mouth, blushing, failing to notice Deuce’s equally red face.

“Nyah!!! Watch it! No crushing the mighty Grim!” The little cat hopped out of the way and into Deuce’s arms as the two of you began to playfully wrestle. “I can’t be smushed before I become the greatest mage ever!”

You and Ace continued to fight for a few minutes, Ace gaining the upper hand as you were already laying down. Eventually, he finished your fight by simply holding your hands hostage in his, and laying across you, preventing any movements other than squirming, much to the other two’s amusement.

Unable to wrangle your hands back, you ceased your movements, huffing. Haha, I win. Instead, you relaxed, finding his presence on your chest comforting, like a weighted blanket.

Silence overtook the four of you for a few minutes, Deuce looking off into the nearby woods, Grim grooming himself, Ace settling in for what looked like a nap, and you gazing at the sky as stars began to emerge in the dusk.

“It’s just…” You spoke quietly, breaking the silence as if telling a deep secret. Maybe you were. “I’ve been so dependent on others while here, and now I feel like I can take that burden off of others.”

Your comment disrupted the comfortable quiet between you all.

“You’re not a burden,” Not to us. Deuce spoke up, his voice soft. “But I understand, wanting to become independent.” I want the same too.

“If you were a burden, we wouldn't've stuck around for so long you know!” More brash, but just as soothing, Ace scoffed. We love ya too much for that, anyways. “I think Deuce would agree with me.”

“Besides!” Grim piped up, standing up now with hands on his hips, You’re my henchman! “I need my henchman! You wouldn’t be allowed to go anywhere without me!” How else are you gonna survive without the great Grim!

You smiled at the three, taking a deep breath.

I don’t know what I’d do without you guys. I wonder what would’ve happened, if we never crossed paths the way we did.

Grunting, you push Ace off to the side (“Hey!”) and stood up, stretching your limbs until they gave a satisfying pop.

“We should probably head back, Riddle’ll probably have both your heads if he finds out you're missing from concession duty.”

“Ah shit.” You’re totally right.

They’re right. “Are you sure you’ll be okay though? It’s gonna be way more crowded once the ceremony starts.” Deuce stood up with you, letting Grim take a perch on his shoulder.

Myah! I’m taller here!

“Hm, yeah I think so.” You held a hand to Ace and helped him up. “I’ll just focus on whatever you two start dozing off about! Don’t think about anything gross though, Ace.”

He threw his hands up. “I don’t know what you’re talking about!” What? You think I’d think of dirty thoughts? “It’s not like I’m actively trying to think of stuff to freak you out!”

“… I heard you think about whether or not you’d fuck your own clone—”

“THAT WAS ALL CATER!”

Laughing at Ace’s red-faced embarrassment, your little group walked back to the coliseum to join your friends before the graduation, and the end of the school year, finally commenced.

Geez, it’s crowded.

Ah man, I hope I’m not forgetting anything.

I wonder if they’re gonna let us keep our rooms when we get back.

The food’s gonna go bad! Come on, let me get to the mirror!

My internship will start right away, I should tell them goodbye now.

I wonder who’ll be housewarden now that Leona’s gone.

I can’t believe I went through the entire year without meeting Idia, my own housewarden!

We can’t lose you!! Come back, I can’t work the lounge without you!!

Groaning from both the noise of the crowd and their thoughts, you rubbed your temples, reminded of the night before. Grim was still at the dorm, peacefully dozing off the morning away. At least this time you could blame your friends for keeping you up at the impromptu sleepover.

“I told you to go to bed early,” That’s how you get sick, Prefect.

“Shaddup Jack, that’s not why I’m feeling sick.”

“... I didn’t say anything about you being sick?” Did I say that out loud? “Uh, you’re okay, right?”

Waving off your slip-up, you nod. “Yeah, I’m fine, just tired. Hey, who’s gonna be Savanaclaw’s housewarden with Leona becoming a fourth year? Do y’all have, like, a throw down or something?”

Crossing his arms, ears flattening, Jack shook his head. That’s stupid. “No, of course not.” They’d probably do that if they could honestly. “Leona had appointed Ruggie, surprisingly, but he didn’t want it. Said he didn’t want to fight with whoever might become vice housewarden later on.”

“Eh? But I heard that he took it after all!” Epel chipped in, hair swept back in a ponytail and skin immaculate despite the late night activities (damn Vil and his pristine skincare routine). “What made him change his mind?”

“A-ah, well, I uh-” Rubbing the back of his head, Jack suddenly looked embarrassed. “asked me to be his vice housewarden, and I couldn’t refuse an upperclassman’s request.”

“Woah, what!” No fair! “I can’t believe he asked! Vil didn' even spare a glance at me!” Epel pouted, his accent emerging before he caught himself.

“I mean, good for you Jack! I’m happy for you!” So unfair…

“Yeah man! Don’t be so bashful about it!” It’s super cool! Ace and Deuce approached you two, out of breath from running over, “Riddle definitely didn’t consider one of us for vice! He asked someone from his year to take Trey’s place.”

The pair had woken up late and ran over to pack up the rest of their things (or at least Ace did, Deuce had his stuff already packed, but couldn’t find his shoes at Ramshackle this morning), so both were slightly disheveled.

“Of course not! Rosehearts would only expect the best of his dorm to lead the rest by example! Something the two of you humans fail to do!” Unlike me! My lord asked me and Silver to take his and Master Lilia’s place! Oh, joy to be considered a guiding leader by the Young Master!

“Unlike you two, I was deemed worthy by the Young Master to be Diasomnia’s new vice housewarden!” Sebek chastised the two, dressed in rather prim clothing that didn’t differ too much from his dorm uniform. “If you two were to shape yourselves up, then I’m sure Rosehearts would’ve considered once of you as his vice housewarden!”

Groaning, Ace rolled his eyes at Sebek, who made an offended noise, before throwing an arm around you. “Hey Prefect, you know our offer still stands-”

“What do you mean our offer, Ace, I made it first!” Deuce grumbled. You’d probably make them clean your room or something as payment.

Shut up, Deuce. “-You can always stay with one of us during summer break! The headmage probably has someone else that can care for the fairies anyways. Enjoy the break with us!” Ace grinned and gave a sly chuckle. Plus, you can wear a super cute bathing suit to the beach with me! Yeah, I know you heard me~

“...Thanks Ace, maybe next time.” Deadpanning, you reached up and yanked on Ace’s ear, who started yelping in pain, as you pulled.”No guys, I promise I’ll be fine! Some of the juniors—or I guess seniors now—they’re gonna be coming to the college during break to solidify their internship credits and stuff. Plus I got the ghosts, so I won’t be lonely!”

Deuce looked at you with furrowed brows and concerned eyes. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, but don’t worry,” you winked. “I’ll definitely be coming by to meet your mom. I’ll let you know so I can figure out the ferry and bus and stuff!”

“Oi! You can’t say that and not visit me too! It’ll basically be in the same area,” Ace whined, he’d accepted his fate with his ear in your hand.

“Yer gonna visit my place too then!” No fair to see just them!

“I’ll be visiting Epel’s place later in the summer, so we can meet then too,” Jack offered, a small smile on his face.

“Then it would only be acceptable to visit Briar Valley too! The Young Master—” And I. “—should be your first visit!”

Smiling at your friends, you felt incredibly lucky to have made a small family for yourself in a home away from home. Soon enough though, each passed through the magic mirror, exchanging promises of visits in the near future, though Sebek’s voice still rang in your ears.

Even when the last of your friends stepped through the mirror, you loitered around the mirror chamber and wished farewell to your other acquaintances and friends. Cater even gifted you a custom phone case before leaving, promising to message you on Magicam when he returned before his internship. As the crowd became smaller and smaller, you yawned and determined that it was time to take your leave and sleep for the rest of the day with Grim.

Turning to the exit, someone’s peculiar thought entered your head.

Ah, no goodbyes for me, my cute little pearl? How devastating! Why don’t you look my way, cute little Y/N?

Whipping your head around with wide eyes and a flush face, you scanned the remaining students for the person whose thoughts you heard. Searching for someone looking your way, or looking sad, or something, you came up empty. A few students from Heartslabyul, Ignihyde, and Octavinelle remained. From the remaining students, you only recognized Azul and the Leech twins, none of which were looking in your direction.

Tired and confused, you shrugged and simply continued your leave. Though, not without one final thought entering your brain.

Finally leaving? Until next year then, my little pearl~.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst jade #jade leech #jade leech x reader #jade leech x yuu #mochi fic #thoughts of a moray

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milfjuulpod · 5 months

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Guidance, Ch III

A/N: hiii sorry this took so long, all the chapters are posted on my AO3, same username. hopefully the next update will be better, i’m not too proud of this one :,(

previous chapters are on AO3 and my master list, here

You and Melissa had agreed on meeting after school for coffee on Thursday, giving you each time to prepare some work. One of her students was showing signs of dyslexia, and after a one-on-one meeting with the student, the redhead decided to take action. Via email, she gave you some information to get started and make an IEP for her. It was quite early in the year, and with it being your first year doing this job, you were quite nervous. Nonetheless, you put your best foot forward and got to work nearly immediately.

Of course, your habit of drowning yourself in work caught the attention of others. A knock at your door pulled you away from the research in front of you. “Hey you! I feel like you’ve been here for weeks and we’ve barely bonded,” Janine announced herself, entering the room. The younger teacher was sweet, and even though her overzealous personality could be a bit much, you knew it was coming from a good heart.

“Sorry, Janine. I get wrapped up in work pretty easily. How’s your Tuesday going? Kids treating you right?” You asked, minimizing the tabs on your computer.

“Oh my students are great, right now we’re working on fractions and it’s actually going good!” She said enthusiastically. “I’m glad to hear, can I help you with anything?” You continued.

“Uh, yeah! Jacob and I are going out for trivia on Thursday, you should totally join us! I heard you went to a great university and we would love to spend some time together after school. Have you met Jacob? He’s so sweet you’ll love him, you know actually-” You cut off Janine before she could start one of her infamous rants, which you heard lots about and we’re lucky to avoid until this point.

“Actually, I can’t Thursday. Don’t get me wrong, I would love to get to know you guys but, I’m actually meeting with Ms. Schemmenti to help one of her students out.”

Janine’s face dropped, and just as quick as it did, she returned to her peppy demeanor. It reminded you of what she previously said about Melissa, and you silently wondered if there was any truth to it. “Oh, no worries. I’m sure we’ll figure something out soon,” Seemingly wanting to avoid more rejection, Janine gathered her things. “Wait, Friday is our half day, right? Maybe we could go grab lunch or something after school? Make up for me missing trivia?” You offered, not wanting to make her feel bad.

It seemed like you made the right choice, as Janine immediately bounced back. “That would be awesome! I’ll tell Jacob right now, see you around!”

The rest of the week passed by rather quickly, filled with new paperwork and projects that you continued to work on. Thursday came before you knew it, and with the final bell, the plans you had put most of your attention to were gathered, on their way with you to meet Melissa for coffee.

Opus was gorgeous inside, filled with neutral colors and artwork from the team and local artists. Plants covered the walls and even decorated some tables. It was nice, you were happy to meet the redhead in a place like this. Upon seeing her, you felt your breath catch and couldn’t take your eyes away. Sure, it was right after school so she was wearing the same pink sweater and tight jeans, but something about seeing her more relaxed, outside of the school walls, it made your heart beat a little bit faster.

“Hey hon, thanks for meeting with me after school. I brought some stuff to brainstorm with…” She trailed off, picking a table for the two of you and immediately covering it with papers and binders. Janine’s voice rang in your head again, and you began to feel insecure about where you stood with Melissa. Maybe even stupid, for thinking she would find a friend in you.

“That’s fine, I’m gonna grab our coffees, macchiato?” You asked, but Melissa was quick to turn down the offer. “Absolutely not, you buy me coffee all the time. It’s my turn,” she walked past you, gently pushing you to the side with a hand on your back. Just as quickly as you remembered the infamous words about the older teacher, you forgot them.

The rest of the afternoon was that way. One moment, completely entranced by the woman across the table from you, unable to pull your attention away. The next, avoiding eye contact and feeling uncomfortable and used. Something told you Melissa noticed your switch in behaviors almost every time, the way she would mimic your actions. It was impossible to read her. Maybe she wanted it that way, maybe you just couldn’t read her.

After a couple of hours of this back and forth, the two of you decided to call it. “Thank you, again, for helping me. It means a lot,” Melissa said outside of the cafe, wind blowing her hair ever so slightly. “Oh…It’s no problem, I’ll see you tomorrow,” You smiled and turned to take your leave, anxiety bubbling at the surface, until a hand grabbed your wrist to face its owner yet again. “Hey, what’s goin’ on with you today? Usually you’re more…I don’t know…upbeat and engaged. Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, sorry. I just…I mentioned to Janine the lunch you shared with me earlier and she said something that made me a little nervous,” You answered. As much as you didn’t want to tell the truth, you figured lying would be even worse. Instead of replying, Melissa motioned for you to continue. “She said she hoped you weren’t buttering me up for something and why else would you be nice to me?”

Wrong choice. Melissa’s eyes widened and you could see all the rage she had in her expression. “Oh, so I can’t be nice to the newbie for one day? I gotta get somethin’ out of it? And you believed her…This whole time? Whole time you’ve been buying me coffee and offering to help, what are you trying to get out of it?” She yelled, and didn’t give you any time to retaliate as she got in her car and left you on the steps.

Defeated, you stood alone for a moment, trying to collect your thoughts. You felt like an idiot, again. For believing what Janine said, and for treating Melissa poorly. You threw your work into the passenger seat of the car and drove to trivia.

“Oh my god! I thought you weren’t coming? Weren’t you going to meet Melissa today?” Janine nearly yelled as she ran from her booth of friends up to you. “Yeah…I did. It didn’t go too well actually so I wanted to come here and at least have a good night. I hope that’s okay?”

“Of course it is, here come sit with all of us.” Janine led you back to the booth with Jacob and Gregory, happy to be in the company of new friends. “Alright, trivia doesn’t start for another thirty minutes, what happened?” Janine asked, which was followed by Jacob interrogating you as well, and Gregory listening attentively. You explained the entire afternoon to the three of them, hoping to at least get it out of your system. All three of them had something different to say, but you took Gregory’s advice to heart.

“Listen, Melissa’s a bit tough on the outside, but she always means well. Just apologize to her for reacting that way and, with time, I’m sure things will be fine.”

Thankfully, trivia started shortly after the advice dump you received, and you were happy to be done talking about it. Hopefully tomorrow morning, with a macchiato and an apology, you could make it up to Melissa.

#abbott elementary fics #abbott elementary #lisa ann walter #wlw #melissa schemmenti x reader #melissa schemmenti x you #melissa schemmenti

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ughgoaway · 2 months

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thinking about drunk teacher girlie out on a night out with the women of the 1975 and the drunk phone calls that follow, of course.

✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿

you sneaking off to the bathroom to call matty after a couple of guys hit on you, and it's just drunk rambling about how much you like him.

"and there was this really tall guy. like wayyyy taller than you-"

matty cuts you off mid-sentence, saying, "Alright, I don't know if I needed that bit of info, but -"

"SHH MATTHEW LISTEN. he was all like 'oh you're so hot you should come home with me', and I finally got to say 'no, I have a boyfriend.' Isn't that so cool!!"

"very cool my love," I like to think it's the first time you use the term "boyfriend" when talking about matty to him, so he gets a little flustered at you finally saying he's your boyfriend. but he doesn't put too much weight on it, considering the whole "drunk out of your mind" thing.

so yeah, it's early on in the relationship. And whilst obviously, matty knows you like him, but he didn't quite know how much.

"and I just think you're so pretty. I used to always tell my friends about your pretty curly hair." You ramble, slurring your words, but matty can still just about make out what you're saying, "I want to do your hair. Will you let me?" You perk up immediately at the thought, and matty can't help but lightly laugh at how excited you sound.

"Of course darling, you can do it tomorrow, yeah?" matty is already grabbing his keys as he talks to you, preparing to inevitably come pick you up

"Mmm, yeah. then we can have a shower together. and I can steal your nice shampoo, the lavender one." You're leaning against the sink as you talk, and you can feel yourself getting more and more tired with each word.

"Will you come get me matty, m'tired. and I wanna see you, my pretty boyfriend. " You complain, and before you even finish your sentence, you can hear the engine roar to life on the other side of the phone.

"Be there in 20"

//////

matty manages to get there and soon wrangles you away from charli, who at first doesn't recognise matty and shouts at him for "kidnapping! wait, or is adultnapping?"

after minimal fighting and a lot of flirting from you ("Do you know you're like, really hot? a proper dilf. " "Yes darling, that's the 3rd time you've told me I'm a dilf, thank you though.") Matty gets you in bed, but before long, you start whining about your makeup being on.

"ughhh it's gonna be so bad for my skin. but m'too sleepy. oh well!" You try to flip over and burrow into the pillows, but matty stops you and pulls you to sit up before running off you get your makeup wipes.

"Nope, it'll only take 3 minutes, and I'll do it for you, sweetheart. You just sit there and look pretty, yeah?" You hum happily at being called pretty, and stay on the bed trying not to fall asleep sitting up.

Matty quickly searches his cupboards for anything you've left behind on your nights staying over. he stumbles across a pack of makeup wipes and briefly remembers you saying something about just them not being enough. But honestly, the way your eyes are drooping, he knows it's more about speed than technical skill at this point.

he gently wiped at your eyes, making sure to get the mascara off, "because I know it always burns your eyes, baby. just a few more wipes, I promise."

soon enough, you're passed out snoring on the pillow, and matty is getting you comfy before settling beside you.

///////

now... the next day at school? hellish. 30 screaming 6 year olds + a killer hangover is not a good combo. and you almost feel like scolding carly for convicing you to go out, but to be honest, you were just as bad an influence.

matty brings you a coffee at lunch, "knew you'd be absolutely hanging, sweetheart. was no trouble popping in, really." he says with a sweet smile and a takeaway coffee.

you immediately have a few sips of the coffee, sighing happily as the hot liquid falls down your throat. you put the drink down after chugging a little bit too much at once, but that's forgotten as soon you pull matty into a deep kiss as a token of your appreciation.

After a few seconds too long with a little bit too much tongue for a kiss at school, matty pulls away a little bit dazed and blinking hard. "I'll bring you coffee everyday if that's the welcome I get, fucking hell"

So he brings you coffee whenever he can get away from then on, switching to herbal tea once you get pregnant with baby healy no.2 <3

#not real writing just my rambling thoughts lol #gotta start somewhere i suppose #anyway this was a scrapped 75 valentines fic!#perhaps I'll actually finish it one day lol #teacher au!

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thebadgerclan · 9 months

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Surprise

Pairing: Nikolai Lantsov x reader

Summary: You surprise your husband while he’s away...

A/N: Not requested, but I wanted to write some Nikolai fluff before some angst tomorrow 😂

Only two months into your marriage, Nikolai was called away from the Palace. There had been an attempted coup in Adena, a local militia attempting to oust their governor and claim power. Luckily, they had been unsuccessful, and injuries had been minimal, but the King was still needed to help run damage control and smooth things over. Nikolai had left nearly two weeks ago, pulling you in for a desperate kiss, clearly unwilling to leave.

“I’ll be home as soon as I can, my love,” he told you. “I’ll write as often as I can.” But his letters had been far and few between, though you knew he was probably quite busy. Which left you alone at the Grand Palace, missing your husband and fretting over his safety. But then you got a letter: My love, I’m pleased to say that the situation in Adena is mostly resolved. The rebels have been tried and arrested, the city is safe again. So you can cease your worrying, beautiful girl, I am just fine. I miss you, my Y/N, so very much. Yours, Nikolai.

Hearing that Adena was once again safe had sprouted an idea, and you called for your chief lady-in-waiting. “Ready a carriage, please, and have a full wardrobe readied as well.” Your lady nodded. “Of course, Your Majesty. Might I state our destination?” You stood, smiling as you smoothed your skirts. “We are going to Adena. To see my darling husband.”

***

The governor of Adena’s staff were shocked by the sudden arrival of the Queen. His housekeeper came to greet you at your carriage, dipping into a deep curtsey before you. “Begging your forgiveness, moya tsaritsa,” she said. “We were not expecting you. And with the coup, everything is amiss, and-” “Please,” you interrupted her. “No apology is necessary. I am here to surprise my husband, and perhaps to impose on your hospitality as well.”

The housekeeper curtsied again. “Of course, Your Majesty is always welcome. I must say, though, that we have no feasts prepared, no balls, no-” “Please, Mrs…” “Egorov, ma’am.” “Mrs. Egorov, with everything your household is dealing with, I could never expect feasts or balls at such a time. Do not worry yourself.” Mrs. Egorov looked visibly relieved, and you smiled. “Now, might I inquire as to the whereabouts of my husband?”

“Certainly, ma’am. He is in the study. If you take the stairs, it is the second door on the right.” “Thank you.” Mrs. Egorov curtsied once more as you passed her, entering the house and following her directions. The door to the study was open, yet you knocked on the doorframe. Inside, you heard Nikolai sigh, and you imagined him rubbing his face and pinching his brow in frustration.

“What?” came the voice of your husband, a voice you hadn’t heard in nearly three weeks. You stepped into the study, finding that Nikolai hadn’t even looked up from his papers. “Now, is that any way to greet your wife?” Nikolai’s head snapped up, his face breaking into a grin. “Y/N! My love, what are you doing here?” Before he could stand, you moved to settle yourself in his lap, your arms around his shoulders.

“I missed my dashing husband, of course,” you replied, pressing your lips to his. “Two weeks after our wedding and you’re miles away. It’s almost like you’re avoiding me.” You were clearly joking, but Nikolai’s brow furrowed. “I’m sorry, sweet love. I may be your husband, but I’m also the King, and sometimes the King needs to attend to his duties.”

“I know, darling,” you replied. “I was kidding. But I did miss you.” “And I missed you, my love. And I would have brought you with me, but it wasn’t safe.” You nodded, resting your head on his shoulder. “I understand, Kolya. But it’s safe now, and I’m here.” “Two things I have been longing for since I arrived.” You pressed a kiss to his jaw, the late afternoon sunlight making his golden hair glow.

“If you need to work, I can–” “No, no, my dear,” your husband said, wrapping his arms around you and squeezing you tightly. “I can get my work done just like this. I missed my beautiful bride too much to let you out of my sight.” He pressed a kiss to the top of your head before moving his chair back towards the desk and selecting a piece of parchment, returning to his work. Only this time, he was much more content.

***

Nikolai managed to get far more done with you in his lap than he anticipated, pausing when his hosts called him down to dinner. Your staff had brought your luggage up to the suite of rooms Nikolai had been using, and you changed into a slightly more formal gown for dinner. Nikolai entered the dining room with you on his arm, his chest puffed out with pride.

The governor of Adena bowed as you entered. “Your Majesties,” she greeted. “I must say, this is a pleasant surprise. Queen Y/N, we were not expecting you to be joining us!” “Neither was Nikolai, I assure you. When I received word that the rebels had been subdued, I packed up and set off. I hope I’m not an imposition.” “Of course not! We’re happy to have you, Your Majesty!”

Everyone sat down to dinner, and conversation flowed easily. Nikolai felt at ease for the first time in weeks, in part thanks to the fact that the rebels had been apprehended, but mostly due to the fact that you were at his side. Your presence was like a salve on a wound, making the King happy in a way that little else could. Once the dessert dishes were cleared, Nikolai stood and offered you a hand.

“Shall we retire, my dear?” he asked, and you smiled as you took his hand. “I believe we shall.” Everyone rose as you departed, but you barely noticed, your gaze fixed on your husband. Once upstairs, your maids helped you dress for bed before departing, when you immediately found yourself in Nikolai’s arms. He was kissing you deeply, his palms warm on your back through your thin nightdress.

“Nikolai,” you breathed, following him when he led you towards the bed. “I just want to hold you tonight, darling,” he said, smiling as you snuggled into his chest, pulling the covers over you. “Fine by me, Kolya,” you replied, kissing the underside of his jaw. “I love you. I love you so much.” “I love you more, my love,” he whispered, reaching out to turn the lamps down. “Don’t leave me for this long again.” Nikolai smiled, kissing your forehead. “I won’t, angel.”

#nikolai lantsov x reader #shadow and bone fanfiction #nikolai lantsov x you #shadow and bone reader insert

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nerdieforpedro · 5 months

Text

Sard’ika Sessions

Session Two

Fanfiction 18+

Masterlist | Sard’ika Sessions Masterlist I Din Djarin/ The Mandalorian Masterlist

Summary: You still vividly recall your first session with your Mandalorian. His hands exploring your body and his beskar pleasuring you. New risks are taken before and during your session. Things are left unsaid.

Warnings: masturbation (female and male), sex toy use, semi-public sexual activity, HANDS, fingering, praise kink, Din being a soft dom menace at this point, money for sexual favors, sense deprivation (sight), scent kink, body worship, anal play, oral sex (male and female receiving), cum kink, angst (a little bit because I’m mean)

Notes: So basically, I turned the smut dial way up in this session. I actually planned to space it out, but decided not to because I too am a menace to my readers and myself. I hope everyone who reads enjoys and if not, eh…I dunno what to tell you because we’re only at session two. We’re going to further space buddies. 😎

Word Count: 3.8k (approx)

Space beta buddies special thanks: @i-own-loki , @megamindsecretlair and @theywhowriteandknowthings ❤️❤️❤️

The day after the bounty hunter left, you received a black box delivered via courier. There was no name but instinct told you who it was from - The Mandalorian or Din as he told you to call him from now on. Making sure to drink water before opening it, good that you did, for it contained a card and tools that he wanted you to practice with.

Sard’ika

I’d like for you to resolve to use these items and learn more about your body. We will utilize them to assess your progress.

Make sure to wear the emerald for me Mesh’la.

Din

Inside the box was a glass bottle of viscous liquid, upon further inspection, it was lubricant. Next to the lube, a velvet purple bag contained three plugs - anal plugs, the small insert card explained with increasing sizes to prepare one’s ass for insertion of larger objects. You licked your lips at the thought of Din’s length inside of you, but any previous entry attempts to your back door had been met with minimal prep and pain. A small smile spread on your face at the thought Din displayed in his actions. There were some small metal items that looked like they had small metal balls attached to a paperclip except it looked closer to tweezers maybe? There was another card, explaining that they indeed were closer to tweezers and that they attached to your nipples. You figured out the items, it would be easier to start with the clamps first.

You stood naked in the refresher to get a better look at what you were doing with the things and at a few different angles. Your hunch was correct and getting them to stay on was a challenge in itself as they had a tendency to roll your nipple and pop off. Once sufficiently clamped, you found that the crisp metal reminded you of the Mandalorian’s beskar, Din’s beskar that you had rode to your climax the last time you saw him. The memory soon had you bent over the sink, hearing the small metal ball weights attached to the clamps clack against the sink as you stretched your hand to your wet lips. Calling his name, you wondered if this is what he saw when his visor was trained on you less than 24 hours ago. Your fingers were much too thin and short in comparison to his, not stretching you enough and too soft to have the same effect his did. You opted to pull on one of the nipple clamps, teasing your own breast and giving focus to your clit, making you crumple over your sink as your forehead touched the mirror, it felt similar to his helmet so you stayed in the position for a bit, letting the decreasing waves of pleasure run their course.

The next day, after your shift at the bounty hunter’s guild, you decide to try out the anal plugs - starting with the smallest one, you weren’t completely insane. You showered and got in your bed after placing two towels on the bed just in case. Of what you weren’t sure, but you figured it was better safe than sorry. A small amount of the cold jelly was placed on the small plug as you bent forward and brought it behind you, slowly inserting it past your buttocks and into your anus. Despite the lube, there was still a burn from the stretch in muscle, but not as bad as you had imagined. You managed to keep it in for ten minutes before removing it, cleaning it and dressing to make yourself dinner. The subsequent days were spent getting more familiar with the equipment Din had sent. The day before he was due to return, you received a hologram from him, it instructed you to wear your clamps and whichever anal plug you were up to to work for him. It made you nervous, that somehow, someone would notice that you seemed a little excitable the following day, but for him you would. He did pay quite a handsome sum of credits and you wondered if the tools would come out of what he would pay this upcoming session.

The day was proceeding smoothly. Processing bounties and doling out credits as well as new jobs with pucks that came in from requestors. It was toward the end of your shift, things had slowed down and there had been no sign of his shining armor though the doors of the Guild. It was when you took a swing of your water, that you spotted him come through the double doors, his broad frame strode in slow motion toward you. Your back straightened, your bra rubbed against the clamps under your blouse and vest, the added pressure from your corrected posture made the second butt plug press a bit deeper into you, making a silent whimper as the Mandalorian sat across from you.

“Afternoon. It’s good to see you.” You nodded and returned his greeting, barely able to keep your composure. His low register, even distorted by his helmet, was palpable and had your core aching. Standing to get his payment of credits and one small slab of beskar shifted the plug and had you take a deep breath as you gushed in your panties, wetting them.

“I'm glad to see you too. Here's your payment, I’ll be right back, Mando.” It pained you to call him by his title rather than his name, but you were aware his name should not be spoken outside of the two of you. Quickly you gave him his payment and returned to the back, where there was a spare office, you needed to take the pressure off your ass. It was too intense and his mere presence was overwhelming. Din found your behavior curious and wanted to know if his hunch was right, following you to the spare room. He closed the door and locked it. He could tell. You must have followed his instructions and not only used the items but were wearing them, had them inside of you. The bounty hunter licked his lips inside of his helmet, hungry for the results of your bodily studies. “Mando, you can’t be in here. I need a few minutes, please.” Your voice is small, another oddity. Din closed the gap,

“Turn around Sard’ika. Show me your face.” You turned slowly and held onto the small desk that was in the room, otherwise you may fall. “Lovely girl, open your legs for me. I’ll ease your tension.” He watched as your eyes went wide, his bare hands were before you and reached down, gently raising your skirt and parting your thighs, he didn’t feel you try and close them and pressed forward, running a finger along your soaked panties before moving them to the side. “I’ve waited to touch you and feel your warm skin again. Especially here, it’s so hot. Will you continue to melt for me?” His visor met her eyes, you nodded and placed your hands on his shoulder pauldrons. Din’s middle finger slipped inside of your folds and held one of your knees up to spread your further, your soft whimpers slowly became moans as his speed increased. Fellow employees were shuffling up and down the hallway just beyond the door which pressed a sense of urgency into your hips.

However, when you grind them onto Din’s finger, you found that he added another one, taking a yelp from you. Unable to keep yourself quiet, the warrior releases your knee and places his thumb in your mouth. “Use me Sard’ika. You want release don’t you?” His voice gives an air of amusement as your lips wrap around his thumb and roll your tongue around it, tasting salt and something you can’t place. With a few more pumps, your walls cave around his fingers, teeth dig into his knuckle before he’s able to pull it out. You hear him hiss, but he doesn’t say anything, letting you recover as he puts his gloves back on and hides the skin of his large hands from you again.

“I’ll leave first and meet you at your place Sard’ika. Don’t take too long. We have much to do.” A soft open and close of the door makes you reconsider what this arrangement may be doing to your mental health, but the money and orgasms outweigh your concerns. Taking a little over five minutes to make sure you don’t look too dishshelved or blissed out, you exit the small back room and go to lock up your desk and complete the handoff to the on coming shift. Despite the anal plug, you hurry home to where the Mandalorian waits for you.

The bounty hunter realized that his actions could have had grave consequences today. He had sought you out because if activities were kept to your home it would be discrete. Your appearance today wasn’t much different from the many other times he had seen you, but those were before he had seen you in your bare form, writing from his touch and looking directly into your eyes. While he was away tracking his bounty, he had spent extra time on his cot and in the refresher recalling your first session together. When he saw you stand a wince, he knew then that you had done as he’d asked. Despite relieving himself of his baser thoughts about you twice before landing the RazorCrest, the area where his codpiece was, grew too small quickly. Din couldn’t just let you walk away in that state, he contemplated asking you to use your hand at the same time he would use his, but he enjoyed being in control and he wouldn’t be able to observe you if he was being pleasured as well.

Once inside your home, you mention wanting to shower. Din rejects the idea. Assuming you are receptive, today’s plan will allow him to partake of your scent more than the faint fragrance left on this thigh guard that faded a few days after his session with you. He asks you to put on one of the green slips he requested and wait for him in your bedroom. He’ll be along in a few. To your surprise, you’d seen the beskar clad hunter carrying two black bags, he never mentioned what may be in them but you did as asked and went to just change into your slip, sitting on your bed. One of the bags Din set on your counter, the same place as he had placed the last bag of credits, this one was a bit heavier. The other bag he brought in with him and removed a blindfold he had tested on himself in the razor crest, making sure that no light would penetrate it.

You didn’t know much about Mandalorian culture, but figured whatever was about to happen, he might be removing more of his armor and didn’t want you to see. Given they had a creed to uphold, it didn’t bother you much. You were to get on your knees on the bed and face toward your headboard.

Din wrapped the blindfold around your eyes three times then tied it. “Sard’ika. Spread your legs but don’t get on your elbows yet.” You nodded as you felt the bed shift, his weight dipping the mattress behind you. His bare hands were present again, slipping the thin straps of your gown down, uncovering your breasts but not removing it fully. Calloused hands cupped the bottom of your breasts, supporting their weight. A small hum released from you followed by a hiss as his frigid beskar chestplate skims against your exposed back. His helmet pressed against your cheek, looking over your shoulder, admiring your pinched nipples. “Have you worn them all day mesh’la?” His deep voice resonates between your thighs, nodding, you place your hands over his ungloved ones, grateful to be touching any part of this man’s skin.

“I have Din. I was looking forward to seeing you today. I’m glad you weren’t delayed.” Your voice is coated with lust as he kneads your breasts, pressing the pads of his fingers into them. You almost missed it, but he called your name before pulling back to ask you to lean forward on your elbows. Once in position, his weight on the bed changes again and you feel the cool beskar slide between you. It feels like it may be his legs and feet, his forearms were large as well, but not as thick as his thighs. Some shuffling of fabric was heard and your hands around their way to his knees, but then slid up Din’s thighs as he pulled your hips toward him. “Din, what do you want me to do next?” You asked, the armor on his thighs was still present so he hadn’t removed it, what did he take off?

The Mandalorian had planned on doing this much later down the line. However, he still recalled the fragrance on his beskar from last week, though it had faded, he wanted to become reacquainted with it. He blindfolded you and his head was behind you, maybe he should have bound your hands too, but he was too impatient. A trait he was noticing applied to you more and more. The pressure of his helmet exhaled as did he when he removed it, it was a large risk he was taking and in some circles a violation of The Creed, but his nostrils were met with the same tangy scent he had pleasured himself to before he slept. Din placed his helmet above his head on the bed, he wouldn’t be needing it for now.

“Nothing for right now. Just let me look at your weeping cunt again. You’ll feel when you should start. You’re a smart woman Sard’ika.” His hands took hold of your ass and squeezed, happy to see his fingers disappear into your ample flesh. Din licked his lips before pushing your ass forward a bit and had an idea. He reached toward your small ring of muscle and removed your anal plug, making a small pop.

Inspecting your asshole, he was reasonably certain that you could try out the third plug size. He reached for it out of the bag and ran it along your wet slit, making you shiver. “I believe you’re ready for this. Let me know if you feel any pain though Mesh’la.” Pressing it in slowly, he was satisfied to see just the small loop sticking out as your ring of muscle spread. You groaned heavily and were surprised to find yourself pushing back toward the plug as he inserted it. His heavy hand slapped your ass while you wiggled it. A low rumble came from his chest in the form of laughter, you leaned forward to raise your ass into their air more, searching for more pressure, you found a velvet, throbbing length press against your chest and narrowly missed your nose.

“I don’t feel any pain. I want to have you inside of me Din.” You sung, pressing your breasts together to capture his long member between your breasts, the cold metal of the nipple clamps you still had on jingled with your movements. Your hands were able to envelope the circumference of his member, the steel of the clamps grazed his hot skin and with the voice he released you realized he sounded different. Louder, closer and without the slight electronic click you’d hear sometime in between his words. Did he remove his helmet? Is that the reason you’re wearing the blindfold? His cock dripped precum onto your breasts making it easier for you to grind them against his length.

“Dank farrik Sard’ika, excellent, keep going mesh’la.” Din clicked his tongue prior to his hawkish nose pressing against your clit, his plush lips touched your folds, drinking your nectar in. Tawdry damp noises were heard from you both, his tongue soon slipped inside of your core, exploring the tight cavern of muscle that longed to clench around anything. On the same token, you opened your mouth and let saliva drop onto your breasts and the thick length you were stimulating yourself with. With that complete, you lowered your head to flick your tongue along the bulbous head, breathing in his musk and sweat, your hips shifted forward a bit to allow you to reach him while still massaging his cock.

Din moved his hands down to your thighs and forced your cunt into his face, he had no more need for air. He just needed to keep lapping your fluids, swallowing them to make himself full of you. If he was lucky, his beard that scratched your slick inner thighs would still be coated with you when he put his helmet back on and he would have your scent for much longer this time. Only the sounds of the two of you gorging yourselves on each other’s heat and muffled moans were heard for a period of time that neither of you were sure of.

Surprisingly, Din climaxed first, thick ropes coating the roof of your mouth and the back of your throat, his hips buckled and his cock slowly became soft between your breasts as you drank his cum, followed by laying your head on the chilled beskar of this thigh. Your hips were rolling onto his face as he continued to sip from your pussy, with a loud cry, you spilled over his mouth, face, chin and neck. Utterly exhausted, you focus on breathing and staying awake. You didn’t want to fall asleep before he left, you wanted to say goodbye, but your body resisted your intentions.

The bounty hunter rolled you on your back and removed the nipple clamps and the anal plug, setting them on the towel on the floor. He sat up and cleaned himself up some, leaving most of the evidence of your climax on his face before putting his helmet back on. The Mandalorian then fixed himself back into his flight suit before replacing his codpiece. He left his gloves for last, his fingers glided up your calves, thighs, doughy belly, breasts and rested on the sides of your cheeks. Removing the blindfold, he was craving the eye contact that you’d give him. Fluttering open, you did just that, reaching for his hands with your delicate fingers tracing the rough skin over his knuckles. “Is there any more you require of me Din?” your raspy voice questioned. Din heard himself hum as it echoed in his helmet, drunk on your scent.

“No Sard’ika. You’ve given me much this session.” His hands briefly left your face to pull your slip back up and feed your arms through the straps, cupping your cum streaked breasts. You saw him hesitate.

“It’s fine Din. Leave them, I can wash the slip later. I’d like to leave a piece of you for a little while after you leave. Ah…unless that’s not okay with you.” It hadn’t dawned on you to ask if he was alright with seeing evidence of his work on you. He shook his head and finished pulling the emerald slip over your breasts. “Um, is there anything you want to try or do for next time?” Clearing your throat, you weren’t sure if it was the last of his cum or your own spit that you needed to move. His thumb traced your bottom lip, pressing it. One of your hands touched his forearm guard, but he interlaced his fingers with yours.

“A piece is me is fine if that’s what you desire, mesh’la. I did bring two different dildos and more lube to use but you can use them for preparation.” Her hands are warm and he doesn’t want to leave. For the first time in a long time, since he had rescued his son, he wanted to leave his helmet off. Unsure if she would approve of his face, Din could fall back on the increased amount of credits he had brought with him this time, but it would lead him to despair if you didn’t like his features. His primary reason he’d like to leave his helmet off would be to have your soft hands touch his face and map it the same way he does yours. From your lips, his digits ran over your wide nose and full eyebrows. You had long coily hair that expanded with exertion and moisture, he would need to commit it all to memory. “I will be gone for a longer period of time - about two weeks. I plan to visit the little one and take care of a few jobs.”

The prospect of Din’s absence weighed heavily on your shoulders, before this started, these sessions. You’d only wonder if you’d be able to talk to him for the few minutes you could, giving him a bounty or paying him out after confirming the client’s stipulations were met. And sure, you’d wonder what he was up to but now things were much more murky between the two of you. “I understand. Stay safe Din.” You wanted to tell him to come back but he already said he was, your eyes closed embarrassed at your thought. Din pulls away from you and picked up the toys he had set on the towel, taking them into the refresher and cleaning them, putting them into the bag he had delivered previously. He then added the two dilios and the additional lube as well. With his gloves back on, he turned to face you, sitting up at the edge of the bed, you winced and leaned to the side, taking pressure off your ass. He had given it a new stretch today. “Din. I think - think we-”

The cool beskar of his helmet touched your forehead and stopped you from speaking. His gloved hands held your face and trailed down to your shoulders. “Sard’ika please leave it for the next session. I understand.” The Mandalorian pulled away from you for the last time before he left. The bag on the counter was heavier than the last time. You stood up to follow his cape, his heavy steps leading to your front door. Din turned and took your hand in his once more before exiting into the dry night air. “There’s much to discuss and I would like to do so when I am able to think clearly.” Unsure of what he meant you nodded.

“You’re right. That would be best. Take care.” You squeezed his hand before letting go, softly ushering him out the doorway. His back was to you he started his long walk to his ship to leave again, closing your door you sat on your couch and wondered what you’d say the next time you see him.

Previous: Session One

Next: Session Three

Space buddy tag list: @rhoorl @for-a-longlongtime @trulybetty @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @maggiemayhemnj @missladym1981 @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @morallyinept @sherala007 @yorksgirl @beabliss @daddy-dins-girl @mandoisapunk @saturn-rings-writes @magpiepills @mrsmando @djarins-cyare @goodwithcheese @fhatbhabie @beefrobeefcal @sp00kymulderr @laurfilijames @legendary-pink-dot @undercoverpena @secretelephanttattoo @megamindsecretlair @alltheglitterandtheroar @gwendibleywrites @iamasaddie @perotovar @soapjay @joels-shitty-puns @linzels-blog @i-own-loki @dindjarindiaries @sin-djarin @djarinsimp @iamafadedmoon @drawingdroid

#pedro pascal characters #fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #din djarin #din djarin x plus size reader #din djarin smut #Sard’ika Sessions #the mandalorian

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justmeinadaze · 11 months

Text

I Have Nothing (If I Don't Have You) Part 3 (Steddie X You)

A/N: I am still so in love with this moodboard. Thank you @sidthedollface2 ! You are amazing <3

Warnings: Soft Dom Steddie X Singer Reader, SMUT, angst, and fluff. Some dark themes regarding addiction (reader does get high and is tempted by all her vices; Steddie confront her), um...I think those are the biggest warnings. Brief mentions of her ex and an encounter with a bad friend.

Word Count: 5851

“Have you never been on a tour bus before?”, you giggle as both boys try to find places to put their things.

“Uh, no, sweetheart. My band wasn’t cool enough to get a bus.”, Eddie grins as he gives up and throws his overnight bag on to one of the bunk beds.

“Honestly, I prefer it to planes. I’m afraid of heights but thankfully we’re just touring the US this time around so…just a bus.”

Your phone begins to ring and after glancing at it you toss it to the side.

“Is he still bothering you?”, Steve asks taking a seat across from you.

“Kind of. He, um, he knows I’m going to fold soon and answer.”

“Why is that something he knows?” Eddie takes a seat beside you, his jeaned knee grazing yours.

Since that afternoon in Steve’s car, neither of them had tried to make another move but to be fair you had been extremely busy preparing for the tour. Occasionally, you would steal a glance or they would find little ways to touch you like placing a hand on your lower back to guide you towards the car or, like right now as they sat next to you, a part of their skin would find yours.

You reveled in that minimal contact; tasting what you so desperately wanted but couldn’t have just yet.

“Because I do it every time…”

“Yeah…but not this time. I mean, you already did something different by not bailing him out of jail.”

“Yeah, his mom did that.” They both smile as you laugh. “He, um, he’ll probably show up at some point…just so you know.”

“And we’ll be ready.”, Steve grinned, giving you comforting wink.

########

“This place is fucking nice, Harrington.” Eddie looks around with amazement as he and Steve walk around the venue you would be performing at in a couple of days.

“It really is. For Vegas I guess this is normal?”

“Speaking of…”, he stops walking, facing his friend. “I hate that her idiot manager made this place one of her stops let alone the first one. We may need to keep a closer eye on her here when it comes to her vices.”

“I agree. She’s been doing pretty good though.”

“Steven, it’s been a week.”, he chuckles. “You don’t undo that much trauma and damage in a week. She IS doing good but if she wants to remain sober, she’s got a rough road ahead.”

***

“Y/N! What’s going on, babe?” The director of the show startles you out of your fog as he shouts your name. You had dissociated into a memory while singing a song you had wrote many years ago about your parents. Usually you, just sang the song, plastered in a haze that numbed your pain as the words flowed through but this time…

“I…I, um, I don’t think we should have this song on the list.”

The boys, who had been sitting in chairs off to the side, heard the change in your tone as they leaned forward to listen to the exchange.

“What? This is one of your number one singles. It resonates with people. You have to sing it.”

“I don’t have to do anything, Mark. Can’t we just replace it with something else?” You roll your eyes as he looks at you with apprehension. “I need a break.”

They see it in your face as you stomp off the stage, splitting up to go in different directions.

“Where are you going, Y/N?”, Steve asks as he runs to catch up with you.

“I just need a break, ok? Can I have one goddamn moment to myself?!”

“Of course you can but then why are you heading towards the back exit?”

“I don’t have to explain myself to you.”

As soon as you open the backdoor, your blocked by Eddie’s towering, broad frame. “Going somewhere, your highness?”

“Move.”, you growl.

“Make me.”

Huffing, you turn around and push Steve out of your way as you head for your dressing room.

“What’s running through your mind, honey?”

You angrily pull a cigarette from your purse, allowing it to dangle from your lips as you search for a lighter.

“I’m not your honey, Steven. You think just because you had your fingers inside of me that I owe you something?!”

“Some respect at least.”

“Hm. Sure. ‘Respect’. All you fucking men are the same.” They watch as your hands shake as you try to work the lighter. “Fuck!”

Eddie reaches into his pocket as he moves towards you, lighting his own lighter, allowing you to bend and ignite your cigarette.

“Tell them again. Reiterate that you refuse to sing the song.”

Your eyes glance up towards them, filled with a lot less hate than before. “I need a drink.”

The metalhead shifts behind you, delicately petting your head as he brushes your hair away from your face.

“No you don’t, princess. Everything’s ok. You’re in control right now. Can you say it for me?”

“I’m…I’m in control.”, you whisper.

“Good girl.” His eyes find yours in the mirror as he smiles. “Say it again.”

“I’m in control.”

Eddie’s grin grows when you say it with a bit more confidence before reaching over you to steal your cigarette. “Thaaaaank you. Now, get back out there and show those fuckers whose boss.”

#########

“Oh come on, boys! Let me have some fun.”

“No.”, Steve’s tone was firm as he watched you slide on your high-heeled shoes. “You can go out and have fun but we need to at least be close by to protect you.”

You roll your eyes as you rise to your feet, smiling to yourself when you notice their eyes drink you in. Tonight, you had some friends that wanted to go out on the strip with you so you asked (politely) if the guys could stay behind. They adamantly refuse.

Before you retort your hotel door flew open as all of your friends ran in to give you a hug.

Throughout the evening, Eddie and Steve were pretty good at being invisible. There were a few times you forgot their presence until you reached for a glass of wine or cup of something bitter and an arm reached over to snap it from your grasp.

“Were they told to keep you from having a good time?”, a girl whined loudly in their direction to make sure they heard.

“I’m sure Jack and Sarah gave them a whole to-do.”

Another girl whispered something in your ear and you nodded your head as she got up from her seat with a friend to glide sexily towards them.

“Hello there. I’m Allie and this Caroline. Y/N has told us a lot about you two.”

“Hm. Not enough it seems because this right here won’t work.”, Eddie politely grins in their direction as he tries to move Allie to the side so he can keep his eyes on you.

“What won’t work?”, she asked coyly.

“Ladies, you’re gorgeous but you need to let us do our job, okay?”

“Oh please. What are you going to protect her from here at a club? The big bad bottle of vodka.”

“No but maybe we can protect her from selfish people who use her for her money and a fun night out.”, Steve responded sarcastically and they recoiled at his comment. “Jesus Christ.”, he sighs when he notices you’re not at the booth anymore.

“Here we go, Harrington.”

****

It took them 2hours to find you and they were livid. You knew they put some type of “Find my phone” tracker on your device so you left it in a taxi that had them running all over Vegas.

They gave up, deciding to wait for you at the hotel when a loud bass behind the door grabbed their attention. As they opened it, they found your friends strewn across the floor in a drunk haze with some other people they didn’t recognize.

You were sitting on your bathroom floor with heavy eyes staring into the void of the wall in front of you. “He-hey, honey!”, you slurred as you looked up at them. “Aha…looks like you found me.”

Eddie’s jaw clenched as he turned to head for the living room. Steve stepped over you, turning on the faucet to allow water to fill the tub.

“Oh, a bath sounds nice. Are you going to join me?” The boy remains silent as you giggle.

“HEY!” The people in the living room jump at the metalhead’s deep, booming voice. “If you’re name isn’t Y/N Y/L/N I want you to leave right now!” They groan as people slowly begin gathering their things causing Eddie to clap his hands loud enough that even you cringed. “Let’s go, people! You have until the count of ten before I call a cop. Eight!”

Within seconds everyone is gone, leaving them to deal with you. Steve lifts your sluggish body, placing you to sit on the edge of the tub as he kneels in front of you.

“Did you think what you did was funny? Disappearing like that.”

“Yeah, a little.” He nods, roughly grabbing your cheeks as Eddie shines a small light in your face. “What the fuck?! Stop that!”

“She’s definitely on something. What did you take, Y/N?”

“Fuck you. You’re my security. I’m allowed to have some fun without you looming over me!” Steve curtly nods again before lifting you once more and placing your fully clothed body into the bath. “Fuck me! That’s freezing!”

You try to jump out but the man’s grip on you tightens as he holds you still. “After you snuck out last time, we warned you not to disrespect us or what we do, right?”

You have no idea why but his calm demeanor despite the circumstances is pissing you off more as you aggressively tug at his hands. “Let me go!”

“We’re going to play a game, Y/N. If you cooperate with us, I’ll let you go. What did you take?”

When you don’t answer, his hand pushes you back, quickly dunking your head under the cold water before pulling you back up.

“What. Did. You. Take?” Steve’s voice is still calm but much firmer than before. You shakily point towards the bedroom and Eddie turns to look through your stuff, finding the drugs you took hidden in your suitcase. By your bed was a plate with a rolled-up dollar causing him to sigh.

“Did you bring this with you or did you buy it here?”, he asked.

“Allie brought it.” Your eyes widen as you watch him dump the contents down the toilet. “HEY! You can’t do that!”

“I just did. Call it penance for running around Las Vegas looking for you for two hours. Here’s your phone by the way.” He displays it in front of you before tossing it across the room onto your bed.

You continue to fight against Steve hold, splashing water everywhere to no success. Something inside you snaps as you stop moving and look around the bathroom. The drugs had begun to wear off but you still felt heavy under their haze. You were submerged in water in this revealing dress pouting like a five-year-old because they threw out what you believed to be your lifeline.

What hurts the most is when you risk a look at them both and are met with not just anger but disappointment. They’re job was to protect you and keep you safe yet you sent them on a wild goose chase so you could get high with people who didn’t give a fuck about you.

Steve lifts his hands and you hang your head as you begin to cry.

“I’m sorry.”

The man rises from his knees, leaning over to drain the tub before sitting on the edge. “Is it alright if I remove this dress? If not, we can step out so you can change.”

“I can’t move.”, you sigh as you respond with a tiny voice.

“Yes, you can. Come on, now.” His palms grip your arms as he fully stands with you. “See?”

Eddie comes up to the side and places some of your clothes on the sink. You gently hang on to his shoulders as he searches for a way to get you out of your gown, finally settling on lifting it over your head. His eyes remain on your face as he hands you a towel.

“Here. Go ahead and dry off, get dressed. Come out when you’re ready.”

“Can you dry me?”

“Like I said…come out when you’re ready.”

“Eddie! Please!”

“Why? Why should I do something nice like that for you after the way you treated us? You think after all that we’d really take care of you in that way?” You flinch as he tosses the towel in your direction. “Dry off. Get dressed. Come out when you’re ready.”

#####

That morning when you woke up, you found both boys asleep on the couch and your heart broke. You had this huge fancy suite that allowed the three of you to have your own room yet last night they slept on opposite ends of the couch to make sure you didn’t try and sneak out again.

One of their phones began to vibrate and you tiptoed to the counter it was plugged into to see who it was before bringing it to Steve’s sleeping frame.

“Steve…Steve…”, you whispered as you gently pushed on his shoulder. “Steve.”

“Hm?”

“Your dad is calling you.”

“My wha?” His eyes crack open as you display the screen for him. He groans as he answers, rolling off the couch, and heading for the bedroom.

Eddie, completely unphased, continued to snore as he slept. You sat on the floor beside him as your eyes scanned his shirtless torso. You had already known about the tattoos on his arms but the ones on his chest were new to you. Reaching over him, your fingers softly traced the inked skin before sliding down his tummy. He seemed to have a couple of scars here and there which you imagined where from previous security guard jobs.

You desperately wanted to kiss them. You wanted to kiss every part of him but after what you did last night you knew you didn’t deserve it. Sighing, you rose to your feet, heading for the shower to get ready for the day.

***

“I didn’t know you could play guitar.”

Your eyes flicked towards Eddie from your spot on the stage floor as you wait for crew to set up things behind you.

“It’s been a while. With, um, with my vices I couldn’t really keep my hands still to do what they needed.”

Hearing footsteps, you swivel your head to see Steve walk towards you two and sit on the floor beside you. He digs through the bag in his hand and produces a sandwich from the shop down the street, handing it to you.

“Lunch. Eat.”, he commands.

“Thank you.” You feel both sets of eyes quickly scan your face as the metalhead takes a seat as well, taking the food his friend offered.

“You ok? A little hung over?”

“No… I just feel a little guilty about last night.”

“Hm. You should.” Steve takes a sip of his drink before offering some to you which you eagerly sip.

“I’m really sorry.”

“We know. Actions speak louder than words, princess.”

“I understand.”

After rehearsal, they walked you back to your hotel, becoming instantly annoyed when they find your friend waiting outside.

“Attached at the hip still I see.” You cringe at Allie’s sarcasm. “Usually Y/N gives me a copy of her key to wait IN the room but I was told she can’t do that anymore.”

“Yup especially with apparent drug dealers coming and going.”, Eddie replies casually as he opens the door and holds it for everyone to enter.

“Pfft, what drug dealers?”

“Oh. So you didn’t bring drugs into this hotel room last night?”

“That doesn’t make me a fucking drug dealer asshole.”

“It does when you give them to her.”

They both glare at each other before she finally turns to you. “Are you going to let him talk to me like that?”

“Is there anyway we can pick this battle and talk about it later? I’m fucking exhausted.”

Allie sarcastically laughs as she reaches into her pocket and throws a baggie at your chest. “Fuck this shit. That’s all you care about, right? That’s all I’m good for? Tell them about how you beg for me to bring you my stash. How some nights you call me crying saying you NEED it.”

“Don’t play this game with me, Allison.”, you growl in her direction.

“You think I’m afraid of you?! Simon is right. You’re fucking pathetic.”

“Yeah, I’ll make sure to tell your husband you said that. Oh wait. Where is he? That’s right. He left you after you gambled away all your savings and I had to bail you out by giving you money so you could keep your house!”

She angrily stepped towards you but Steve blocked her path. “Out. Now.”

“You’ll regret this, Y/N!”

The man pushes her towards the door, shutting her out as she continues to yell. You reach down and big up the bag she threw at you, sighing as you hand it to Eddie.

“I’m going to go change. Will you throw this out for me? I don’t think I have the strength to yet.” You flash him a smile as you head to your room.

“What is it?”, Steve asks as his friend heads towards the bathroom.

“The last of her stash I imagine.”

#########

Later that night, both men came out of their rooms when they heard you shuffling around.

“Are you lost, your highness?”, Eddie asks slightly amused.

“No. Not physically anyway.”

“Whatcha doin’ then?”

“What’s it look like? I’m making a bed on the couch so I can get some fucking sleep.”

“Y/N, you can sleep in your bed.”, Steve chuckles as he leans into the doorframe.

“I could but…it’s not fair.”

“What’s not fair?”

You exhale as you roll your eyes and face them. “I fucked up and snuck away from you two. I should be sleeping on the couch while you sleep in the beds. It’s fine. I mean I’ve slept in worse places and you deserve to sleep on a comfy mattress like those especially if you’re supposed to be protecting me. I want you 100%.”

Their eyes continue to look you over making you groan. “What?! You can still hear and see me from there. If I tried to leave you can still run over here and catch me!”

Eddie glanced at Steve, nodding before placing his body in front of yours. “What? Fine, God damn! If you insist on sleeping out here, don’t say I didn’t—”

The metalhead’s hand shot out, gripping the back of your neck as he pulled your lips to his. His tongue danced with yours eliciting a soft moan before pulling back to rake your eyes over his face.

“Do you want to sleep on the couch?”

“No…”

“Do you want us to sleep on the couch?”

“No.”

“Where should we sleep then?”

“Wi-with me…”

“Oh, come on, princess. You’ve been yelling at us pretty much since we met you. I know you can say it more confidently than that.”

Your palms grip his face as you bring his lips back to yours. Eddie doesn’t miss a beat as you jump up and he grips your thighs in his strong hands as you circle your legs around his waist.

“Sleep with me…” You graze the tip of your nose across his. “…after you fuck me.”

The metalhead carried you to your bedroom, falling with you onto your bed. His lips hungrily ran down your neck as he bit and sucked on your skin.

“Wait…you can’t leave…marks on me before…before a show.”, you pant. He nods as he lifts his head to meet your eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“Sweetheart, that isn’t something you need to be sorry for, ok?”

“Ok. Where is—“, you turn your head looking for Steve, finding him sitting in a chair beside your bed. “Why are you so far away?”

His head tilted as he listened to your voice dip back to that little girl tone you used with them before. Eddie focused on you again, lifting off your shirt as he kissed your skin.

“I’m not far, honey.” To emphasis his point, he crossed his legs on to the mattress in front of him. “I just got to taste more of you last time than Eddie did so I’m letting him explore a bit.”

“Pfft, letting me.”, the boy chuckles as he takes off his shirt and yanks down your shorts with your panties. “Do you hear him?”

His lips trace your chest to your stomach as you reach down and run your fingers through his hair. He places soft tender kisses on the inside of your thigh, driving you wild.

“Eddie, please.”, you beg.

“Please what?”

You whine in frustration and he quickly turns to look at Steve, laughing to himself as the boy’s jaw clenches. He rises from the chair and saunters around the bed, laying down beside you.

“Look at me.” You do as he asks, taken aback by the slight hint of annoyance gleaming within his eyes. “When we ask you something, we expect an answer. No whining or pouting. Understand?”

Eddie’s fingers slide through your folds, opening them wide so you’re perfectly on display.

Steve’s own fingers grab your cheeks forcing you to meet his eyeline. “I said…do you understand?”

The boy between your legs smirks as he watches your pussy flutter at his friend’s words.

“Yes, I understand.”

“Good girl.”

Your eyes rollback when he releases you and Eddie runs his tongue through your sex. “Fuck me. You were right, Harrington. She does taste good.”

While he continues to lick you, you feel him shuffle, briefly looking down to see him kick off his pants and boxers. Much gentler this time, Steve turns your head again to face him.

“When we ask you to do something, we expect you to do it.”

“Mmm—I understand.”

“Now, honey, Eddie and I like to play a bit rough sometimes but we would never make you uncomfortable. Is there a word you feel like you’d remember under any situation? For example, what’s the first word that comes to mind right now?”

It was so hard for you to think as the metalhead wrapped his lips around your clit, sucking and flicking your nub with his tongue.

“I…I can’t…I don’t know.”

“Yes, you do, baby. Come on. First word, any word.”

“P-Paris! Fuck, Eddie. That feels so good.”

“Huh. Well, I definitely have some questions but I can work with that. Ed?”

“Stop if I hear Paris. Got it.”, he responded curtly before shoving his face back into your now dripping core. He moaned against your bundle of nerves, gradually stroking his cock as he devoured you.

Steve pressed his mouth to yours, swallowing your whimpers as you neared that edge. You reached down to rub your palm against the growing bulge in his pants.

“You…you can be rough with me. Just don’t…don’t… I’m gonna…”

“Hey, no. Don’t cum until you finish that sentence.”, he warns.

“Just don’t—mmm—don’t hit me. Fuck! Yes…” Eddie pins your thighs down with his hands as you came hard against his tongue. Your arms wrapped around the other man as you kissed him passionately, your body trembling as you came down from your high. “You can spank me…just don’t like smack me or anything.”, you pant against his lips.

“Ok. Ok, pretty girl.”

Eddie climbed up your frame, placing open mouth kisses on your skin along the way.

“I’m, um, I’m on the pill. I struggle with most things but I always remember to take that. I don’t trust Simon to…ya know.” Your eyes shift between theirs as your voice gets smaller. “I mean, I still understand if you want to use a condom. I don’t have any but—”

The metalhead cuts you off with his lips. “Have you been with anyone else since our wonderful introduction to your now ex?”

“No.”, you grin up at him. “I got tested before the tour to so I’m clean. Have you been with anyone…recently…?”

“We’re attached to you 24/7. Have you seen us with anyone?”, Steve smiles making your grin grow as he stands up to start removing his clothes.

“I don’t know what you do with your free time!”

“Aw, that’s cute. She thinks we have free time.”

You playfully smack his shoulder and he in turn captures your lips. “Do you want me to…?” Your eyes gesture towards his cock and he tilts his head to follow your gaze, tickling your face with his hair.

“Not tonight, sweetheart.” Eddie reaches down to grip your thigh, opening you wider as he drags his length through your pussy lips. “Do you feel that? Do you feel how hard you made me just from tasting you?”, he whispers, his forehead pressed against your own. You moan as he grinds his hips, teasing himself as much as he’s teasing you.

“Please…”

“You want my dick inside you, baby?” You aggressively nod your head as your nails tread down his back. “F-fuck, ask me for it.”

“Please, Eddie, I need to feel you inside of me. I need you to make me cum again.”

Both your mouths fell open as he gradually thrust his cock into your entrance.

“Goddamn, you’re so fucking tight.” His head fell to the side as your fingers reached up to tangle in his hair trying to hold him as closer to you as you could.

“Does he feel good, Y/N?” Your eyes flick up to meet Steve’s who’s watching your face intently as you nod. You could hear Eddie panting in your ear as he pumped into you inch by inch causing your cunt to clench tighter to him. “How do you usually like it, honey? Tell him.”

“I…I…don’t…”, you stuttered over your words as he bottomed out.

“Tell me, Y/N.”, Eddie whispered. “Tell me what you—mmm—what you need, pretty girl.”

“I don’t know.” You felt yourself start to tear up and immediately burrowed into his shoulder.

“Hey. Hey, come on. Let me see that gorgeous face.”, Steve grinned when you looked up at him. “Nothing to be ashamed of in here, baby girl. What do you like?”

“It’s been a long time since anyone has asked me that.” Eddie pushed up on his elbows so he could look at you as well. “You were right. Simon has never made me cum. It’s been a while. Well except in your car.” They both chuckled. “Why don’t you show me what you like?”

“I don’t think you’re ready for that just yet.” The metalhead leans up on to his knees, pushing both your legs back till your own knees were close to your shoulders. He began pumping into you again, your eyes rolling and closing as you feel him touch deep inside you.

You felt Steve’s breath warm your cheek as one of his palms comes up to caress your face. “Eddie and I like to be in charge in a relationship; more so in the bedroom.”

His fingers slide down to trace your lips before softly lingering on your throat. “We like…taking care of you…” Your jaw falls slack as he tightens his grip around your neck as Eddie slams his hips harder into your own. After a few moments, he releases you and the other boy returns to his steady pace. “And in return, you submit to us.”

“Fuck, fuck, please.”, you beg; to which one even you aren’t sure. Steve continues his path down your body till his fingers find your clit. Your hand reaches for his wrist but Eddie is faster, gripping your own as he leans forward over you, pinning it to the pillow.

“Goddamn.”, the metalhead groans as he feels your pussy tighten even further around him. He falls on top of you, rolling his hips so hard the bed moves underneath you. Your body shakes as you cum, moaning his name repeatedly as your free hand clings to his neck.

Eddie couldn’t hold back any longer especially with your cunt spasming around him as you came undone. With a few more hard, deep thrusts he came inside of you causing you mewled at the feeling.

His hair blocked most of his face but you could just make out the hint of a smirk painted across his features.

“Told you…we knew what…a woman cumming sounded like.”, Eddie panted and you snicked underneath him.

“You’re so dumb.”

“And you’re beautiful.”

He gently kissed your forehead before you turned to look at Steve. Your sweaty palm reached for his cheek and he turned into it, tenderly placing his lips against your skin.

“Do you think you can take me, honey? It’s ok if you can’t.”

You almost too eagerly nod your head. “I can.”

Eddie carefully climbed off you and Steve couldn’t help but notice you were still a bit shaky. “Come here, pretty girl.” He moved you with little to no effort, tugging you till your back was to his chest. Lifting your leg, he bent it at the knee in front of you, placing it near the other boy’s hip.

His lips kissed yours until you felt him hold your waist and guide his cock inside of you. You whined at the feeling as he allowed you time to adjust before pushing further in.

“Steve…oh my…fuck. You’re so big.”

Your eyes squeezed shut as you felt his arms encase you and hold you closer to him. His breath warmed the nape of your neck till you felt him bottom out.

“Fuck, baby girl. You’re so warm and wet. You’re making a mess on my cock.”

You’d heard dirty talk before. Hell almost every man in the entertainment business especially musicians thought they would lull any woman into erotic heaven just by saying dirty things in their ear. Simon and every one of your one-night stands had tried it. Every time it made your eyes roll and not in a good way.

Hearing Steve whisper his filthy words as he began really thrusting into you had you seeing stars while you whimpered out answers to his questions.

“Can you feel me stretching you open? Fuck, honey. I’ve never had a pussy this tight before.”

Your eyes fluttered open when you felt another set of hands touching your body.

“You’re doing so good, sweetheart. You look so gorgeous like this.”, Eddie cooed as he leaned in to kiss you. Your head lulled as both their lips trailed along your neck. “Can you cum again for us?”

You moaned as you shook your head. “Too much…”

“I know, princess. I know Harrington can be a bit overwhelming…”

You shook your head again. “Feels too…good. Can’t…”

“Yes, you can.”, he whispers, his finger drifting to your bundle of nerves. “Just give us one more.”

Steve slowed his pace and you whimpered as you turned to grip his neck with your arm. “Fast. Faster.”

“Is that what you need, sweet girl?” He does as you ask, pounding his hips into yours.

You lurch forward bringing Eddie closer to you while your other arm threaded through Steve’s hair behind you as you felt yourself tumble over the edge.

“Jesus fucking Christ.”, the boy behind you groaned as he chased his high.

“Good girl, princess. Such a good girl.”, the metalhead praised as he petted your head, moving your hair out of your face. “You did so well. Are you ready for Steve to fill you up?”

You weakly nodded as your turned to face him, his nose pressing to yours as he panted against your lips. “Please cum. I want you to cum like he did. Please…I need it, baby.”

Your eyes remained on his face as his own closed, eyebrows scrunched together as he came, pumping his seed inside of you.

As carefully as he could, he pulled his cock out of you but you still whimpered at the feeling.

“I know, honey. I’m sorry. Do you think you can handle a shower?”

Drunk on the high of them, you could barely move let alone speak but you somehow managed to shake your head at his question.

“She can shower tomorrow morning before rehearsal. Let me get something to clean her with now though.”

“No…”, you lazily reach for Eddie’s arm before it slides from your grasp. “Too far.”

“He’s coming right back, baby girl. You’re okay.” Steve places soft kisses along your face. “We’re not leaving you. I promise.”

You wince as the metalhead gently opens your legs and cleans between them. “Maybe we should bring her to one of our beds till they change the sheets.”

“Yeah, I think that’s a good idea. Since she doesn’t want to shower, grab another damp rag so we can clean some of this sweat off her.”

“I’m sorry.”, you mumble.

“For what, sweetheart?”

Opening your eyes halfway as Eddie sits you up, you glance towards where you had been laying as he starts running a new rag over your skin.

“I…made…mess.”

“Yeah…nothing you need to be sorry for. Fucking Steve made a mess to. Look at him!” You giggle when he smiles down at you from his place behind his friend as he cleans below his waist. As he reaches your shoulders and neck, your forehead falls to lean against his. “You don’t have to apologize for everything, princess. Not everything is your fault.”

“Hey, beautiful. Can you do me a favor and drink some of this?”

“What is it?”, you cringe as you take it from him.

“Water.”

After the first sip, you couldn’t stop, chugging it back till the glass was empty. “May I have more please?”

Both boys turn to each other, flashing a knowing smile. “Yes, honey. You can have more.”

Eddie suddenly lifts you into his arms and carries you to his bedroom, placing you down on his cool mattress. “Well, at least your using sentences. Do you want a shirt or anything?”

“No, thank you.”

Steve came in handing you the glass again which you eagerly chug after thanking him. They watch as you crawl under the sheets, waiting for you to get comfortable before getting in beside you. As soon as Eddie pulls the covers up, you wiggle to him, placing your head on his chest as you pull him closer.

Steve wraps his arms around your torso and your lower half immediately curves into him making both men smile.

“Can I ask you something?”, he whispers and you respond with a tiny hm.

“Why Paris?”

“My family went on vacation there when…when I was a kid. It was…the happiest I remember us…ever being. I go there sometimes when…I want to be left…left alone.”, you answered as you flitted in and out of sleep. “I…I feel safe…there.”

##########

@rckstrbee @melodymishahiddlestan @alienthingstwo

@siriuslysmoking @micheledawn1975 @cositaslua

@munsonmoonshine86 @unfocused81 @paleidiot

@steddieloverrr @aol19 @strngrlytn @mrsjellymunson

@needylilgal022

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eg4mccc · 1 year

Text

Last Call for Infants Patch Prep!!

(graphic credit: Bonxie)

Tomorrow is the day most of us have been waiting for, the patch to prepare Sims 4 for INFANTS!!! It promises to be busy on support Discords, so I thought I'd start off with a few essential things you should know about getting help from Deaderpool's server.

First of all, READ our #server-info channel!!! There is a lot of information there that will streamline your experience with us. We always know who doesn't bother to read it, by the questions we see in support. We're going to be getting slammed by people with broken mods/cc, please do your part to make things easier on everyone involved, on any server you visit.

Pay close attention to the types of mods/cc/creators who may very well get you banned. Don't bring them to our server.

The people manning support channels are volunteers. Don't be an ass. We're not getting paid to help you, and we don't have to put up with rudeness, disrespect, trolling, and so on. We have no issue with banning people who can't behave properly on Deaderpool's discord. Don't try us.

Don't post the same thing in multiple channels, and don't post the same thing on multiple servers simultaneously. If you don't use two lanes at once in a brick and mortar store, why would you try doing it online? It's confusing and not efficient for anyone trying to work with you. The exceptions would be, if staff refers you elsewhere, to either a different channel, or to a separate discord server, in order to better address your issues. Otherwise, pick one channel on one server, and stay there.

BE PATIENT. Expansion patches are legendary for being super-busy. We'll do our best to get to everyone as soon as possible. There's no need to bump your post, or poke us, unless it's obvious your post has been skipped, after a few minutes/posts around yours are being handled. We're human, stuff happens. Don't get angry about it, just remind us, and we'll move forward from there.

If you're a long-time player, please watch out for the new players, if this is someone's first patch, they're likely to be pretty shocked at the damage. If you speak more than one language, we'd LOVE to add you to our group of Interpreters helping in #bilingual-support. If you're familiar with our server's layout, please help new people find their way around.

Please do not pester creators for information. They're all aware this patch is likely to break things, and they would rather spend their time updating their mods and cc for us, than having to respond to tons of "your stuff broke!" posts on their pages. Don't be that person, just keep an eye on the various #mods-news type channels, Scarlet's list, Luth's forum post, and so on.

This is not our first rodeo, you can trust us to help get you through the damage and back into your game, in the most painless way we can manage.

If we all can work together, we can minimize patch fallout in many ways. Bring a positive attitude, and your popcorn, and get ready to see the show... it's going to be a rocking week!

#deaderpool #discord #sims 4 #patch changes #support

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harry-on-broadway · 10 months

Text

The Last Line: Part Five

Part Five

Word Count: 5.2K || Series Masterlist || Rating: M

***

“It’s perfect.”

“Really?” Penny blinked. “You’re joking, right?”

“No, I’m not,” Skylar said with a light laugh. “There are a couple of things we might want to move around, but this will be a very light edit. Great work, Penny.”

“Thanks,” Penny said, still in a state of shock. “I didn’t think it would be that good. I mean, I didn’t even think about it while I was writing. It was…” she searched for the right descriptor. “Word vomit, as gross as that sounds.”

“We often produce our greatest works when we give ourselves the space to say what we want to say without self-censoring. I wanted the articles in this series to come from the heart and that’s clearly where you pulled this from, Penny. I should have edits to you later this afternoon and we’re well on track to publish it tomorrow morning.”

“Sounds good. I have a couple of calls but I can make time to review it this afternoon.” Penny paused on her way out of the room. “Thank you again. For giving me this opportunity. And for helping me. With everything.” She inhaled sharply, feeling tears prick in her eyes.

“I’m lucky to work with an incredible person like yourself, Penny,” Skylar said. “Helping you, guiding you, it’s my pleasure.”

Penny could feel the eyes of her newsroom on her during the brief walk back to her desk. In the weeks since her meltdown in the conference room, Penny’s coworkers had begun to treat with a newfound sense of respect. Darren had been asked to seek other work in its aftermath of the incident and Penny’s subsequent relationship with Skylar had the others viewing her as some sort of deity.

“Well?” Chloe asked as Penny slid into her desk chair.

“She loved it.”

“As I knew she would.”

“She said she thinks it’s going to run tomorrow morning.”

“So soon! Amazing!”

“Yeah.”

“Do you think he’ll…?” Chloe didn’t need to finish her question.

“I don’t know.” Penny swirled her straw in her cup, trying to get a sip of the vanilla syrup that had gotten trapped underneath the layers of ice and coffee.

“Has he still been creeping?”

“Yes.” They hadn’t spoken since that night at her apartment and Harry continued to ignore every text and voicemail she left for him, but he was still lurking in her instagram stories. She’d started testing him, posting random and mundane shit like her morning coffee and the song she was currently listening to on Spotify. Regardless of whatever her story was, he was the first one to view it.

“And do you think he’ll take the bait?”

“I hope so! Otherwise I don’t know what I’ll do. I just –”

“Hey, it’s fine,” Chloe said, attempting to soothe Penny’s distress. “This is going to work. I promise you that.”

Hours later, Penny’s Slack app chimed with a note from Skylar saying that edits were ready for her to review. As promised, her suggestions were minimal and Penny cleared them all within a half hour. She knew legal and design and all of the other departments involved would need to sign off on their end before it could be official, but by 8am tomorrow, her words would be out in the world.

She didn’t know why she felt so nervous. She’s been through this hundreds of times before, but never had she shared something so personal with the hundreds (Or was it thousands?) of people who read the site everyday. It felt like she was giving a piece of her soul for public consumption. All in the hopes of winning back a man who never wanted to see her again.

She sighed and closed her laptop. “I’m going to head out,” she said to no one in particular, earning a handful of half-hearted acknowledgements from those who were scattered around her. In her car, she opened one of the playlists Harry had shared with her and pressed play. Feeling the music wash over her, she pulled out of the garage and drove home preparing for the most nerve-wracking night of her life.

***

August 17, 2019

The Start of Something New

By Penny Sanders

This coming November will mark one year since I joined the staff at The Moment and four years since I accepted my first, official, grown-up journalism job. Ahead of these personal milestones, I’ve been reflecting a lot on what it means to be a journalist, specifically one that covers the arts.

One of the main tenets of being a good journalist is objectivity. You’re there to present the facts in an unbiased way, calling out injustices and holding truth to power. Everyone learns that in their freshman mass comm class. But what they don’t tell you is how that rule isn’t always so cut and dry.

While I do a bit of everything when it comes to music coverage here at The Moment, my primary role has been that of a critic, reviewing concerts and albums and giving you my honest take on them. It’s a dream job for many, but it’s also one that has caused me a great deal of stress and anxiety over the years.

I’ve struggled to be harsh (even when a well-pointed criticism is deserved). I’ve struggled to hone a voice, oscillating between gushing fan girl and hardened veteran to appear as if I know what I’m talking about. And I’ve been a victim of intense (at times almost debilitating) imposter syndrome, second guessing that my opinions and ideas are even worth sharing.

But all that has changed in recent months as I’ve started to venture down a new professional path, chatting with and profiling newsmakers in this industry we all love. Sitting down for these interviews, I’ve always expected the cold formality that has long been associated with an industry presser – say your question and get your answer as quickly as possible, foregoing any sort of human interaction. Instead, what I found was a connection I never knew I had been looking for.

Recently, I had a chat with an artist who shall go unnamed. I’d reviewed their work before, and while I might have been fair in my assessment of their music, I wasn’t necessarily kind, something that I didn’t realize the impact of until we had a chance to speak face-to-face in an informal setting. As we spoke about our respective writing processes, I had a realization. We were one in the same. We found our way to an industry where everyone speaks the same language, found a pack to call home, and were creating the art we always wanted to, even if it was on opposite sides of the line. That conversation, along with subsequent others, really put into perspective the fact that you can’t separate the personal and professional when it comes to art, as a piece of you will always live inside your creation.

So, why am I rambling about this and forcing you to read it at 8am as you have your morning coffee? Because I’m making some changes starting today.

You’ll still see me around town and on the website reviewing concerts and albums (like I’d ever give that up!), but I’ll be expanding my coverage area as well. I’ll be chatting with some of the biggest names in the industry, cutting through the scripted BS and having real, human conversations about the thing we love most: music. I’ll also be sharing more personal essays about my own thoughts and feelings on the business of the day in an effort to start a conversation with you, our readers.

So, if you’re reading this (and hopefully you still are), what are you waiting for? Let’s chat. My schedule’s wide open.

***

Penny jolted awake at 6am the next morning. She had a couple of hours before she’d be able to share her article and put her plan into motion, so she took her time getting ready, blasting an early 2000s pop punk playlist while she did her makeup and drank her coffee. At precisely eight, she opened up The Moment’s website on her phone, grabbing the link to her article before navigating to Instagram.

She’d already preselected a photo – a throwback shot of her in one of her dad’s old concert tees, cheesing hard in front of a record store. She posted it to her story with a quick caption (Tried something new and got a little personal this morning) and a link to the piece. She watched the progress wheel fill as the story uploaded and when it was finished, she opened it again, instantly spotting Harry’s profile picture in the bottom left corner.

Distraction was essential to the next phase of the plan, so she tossed her phone in her bag, grabbed a thermos of coffee, and started the drive into the office. She could feel her phone burning a hole in her canvas tote, but she ignored it until she was seated at her desk. Her mom and one of her college roommates had replied encouragingly, but there was nothing from Harry.

Doug, the SEO coordinator, greeted her brightly as he made his way to his cubicle. “Already getting a lot of traffic on it. Great work!”

“Thanks.” She checked her phone again. Nothing.

There was an editorial meeting that morning, and then Skylar took her for a celebratory pastry from the bakery across the commons before Penny’s afternoon interview with a photographer. When she finally got to check her phone over lunch, there were tons of notifications, but as she scanned through them all there were none from Harry. In the middle of the afternoon slump, she saw an email come in from Jeff – it was a simple “Nice job!” Not the most encouraging thing, but if Jeff had read it, it was probably safe to assume Harry had as well.

Tom messaged her a little while later, a long and meandering note professing how proud he was of her and how great it was. The most interesting tidbit came at the end though. I think you’ll be surprised by the impact this has.

“What does that mean?” she asked, passing her phone to Chloe.

“I don’t know, that you’re the voice that will define our generation?”

“Be serious.”

“I honestly don’t know! On the surface, it seems like a general ‘this is going to resonate with a wide audience’ comment, but maybe on a deeper level he’s talking about…you know.”

“But that’s not your first instinct.”

“No, it isn’t.”

“Damn it.”

“Pen, it’s OK. We know he saw your post and that’s a start. Maybe he hasn’t had time to sit and read it but will later today or something.”

“Maybe…”

That night as Penny left the office, her head was somewhere else, deep in a daydream of what it would have been like if her plan had worked. Harry would have been outside her door with a cup of coffee and a bouquet of flowers. There would have been a kiss and maybe a little something else, but most importantly she’d have her friend back. Her eyes were on the ground, so it was the loafers and socks that she saw first.

“Jesus Christ, are you trying to kill me?” she yelped, her heart racing.

“I didn’t know how else to find you.” Harry stood sheepishly slouching against her car door, wide-leg trousers slung low on his hips, bowling shirt unbuttoned just a little too far.

“You could have come inside the building for starters? Or texted me? I know your phone is still working Mr. Instagram lurker.”

“You knew that was me?”

“It was pretty fucking obvious to anyone that knows you. And we had a bunch of mutuals including Tom, Jeff, and Mitch.”

“Fuck, I thought I was being a little more low key.”

“Sorry.” Penny shifted uncomfortably. “So-” She was interrupted by boisterous laughter from a group making their way to a group of cars one lot over.

“Maybe we should go somewhere a little more private to talk?” Harry asked. “If you’re comfortable with that?”

“Um, yeah that would be great. Do you want me to drive?”

Harry nodded affirmatively. “I bummed a ride off of Jeff so I am currently without transport.”

“Jeff’s a good friend. I would have made you hitchhike.”

Harry snickered as he opened the passenger door and slid in.

“Do you mind if we make a stop?” Penny asked as she pulled out onto the main road.

“Not at all.”

“Good. I have a tradition after I publish an article.”

“What’s that?”

“An In-and-Out milkshake. Do you want one?”

“Chocolate, please.”

Penny cruised through the drive-thru, grabbing the milkshakes as Harry tried to go unnoticed beside her. Ice cream in hand, she continued driving until they made it back to her apartment.

“This is about as private as it gets,” she said, stirring the thick liquid with her straw. “We can stay in the car if you’d prefer.”

“No, let’s go in.”

Harry stayed two steps behind Penny as she climbed out of the car and unlocked her front door. He followed her lead, taking his shoes off and sitting down on the couch. He took a sip of his milkshake and Penny mirrored his action. Neither was sure who should be the first to speak.

“I’m sorry,” Penny said, thawing the awkward chill that had settled between them. “I know that’s an empty word, especially between us, but I just need you to know that I regret how everything blew up. I have an explanation for it all but none of that matters when you were hurt by my actions.” She paused. “I really hope you forgive me, but I won’t ask you to, as what I did crossed a line.”

“I forgive you.” Harry said without hesitation. “And I would like to hear your explanation for what it’s worth.”

“Oh-kay.” Penny shifted, tucking her legs under her and turning to look at Harry more directly. “So you know how I’ve been trying to mix things up at work, write some more serious pieces? Well, it just so happened that Tom gave me one on a silver platter when he mentioned you were working on a new album. My intent was just to break some news, get a scoop that could show my editors that I could do it. But then I got to know you and you were telling me things that would have made for an amazing story and I just got carried away. I made the wrong choice to keep taking notes and working on this hypothetical story. Then Darren –”

“The asshole.”

“Yes, the asshole. He got involved and it spiraled out of control and things got complicated because of….” Penny trailed off, searching for the right word. “Us.” Penny looked up at Harry. “It’s important to me that you know I would have never published anything you told me after all of that. I value you as a person more than any sort of splashy article.”

Harry nodded slowly. His face was serene but his fingers were working overtime, twisting the ring on his finger at warp speed. “I know you wouldn’t hurt me like that but just seeing those notes you had…” He chewed on his lip and his eyes grew damp. “It used to be so hard to figure out when someone was using me and when someone just wanted me for me. But thankfully, I’ve become a pretty good judge of that. I thought you were one of the good ones so seeing that just made me really second guess not only what we had and how I felt about us but it made me question my judgment. Do any of my friends actually care about me? It was a rough time. I’m still working through some of that if I’m being honest.”

“I hate that I was the cause of that.”

“It was bound to happen eventually so don’t be too hard on yourself,” he said with a wry laugh.

“Well either way…I’m glad my selfish actions helped you grow? That feels weird to say.” Penny laughed. “Anyways, I’m happy we were able to clear the air. I much prefer talking to you face to face instead of watching you lurk on my Instagram stories.”

Harry laughed before placing his cup on the coffee table. “Speaking of talking…I actually did want to discuss something with you.” He cleared his throat.” “That night…the last time we saw each other…what you said? About why you couldn’t do that profile?”

“Mhmm.”

“What did you mean that you love me?”

Penny took a long sip from her drink, buying herself some time to think. “I hated you the first time we met and I don’t know why because I feel like you’re the only person to ever truly understand me. You know what I’m thinking before I say it, you see things in the same way as me, and you make me feel invincible. That day that you read that article that Darren killed…I felt so supported in a way that I haven’t really before, which is like weird to say because I have friends and family who care about me, but standing in that coffee shop with you holding my hand and telling me I was good at my job was something I never knew I needed. But once I had a taste of it, I knew I had to have it forever.” She finished speaking and looked at Harry, who had an indiscernible expression on his face. “That was a lot, I know but you–”

“Can I kiss you?” His voice was low, his question was tentative, and Penny couldn’t even be sure that was what he actually said, but she nodded anyway. At this point, she would have given him permission to do anything.

He approached her carefully, as if any sudden move would scare her away, cupping the back of her head with his hand and drawing her closer to him.

Their first kiss was nothing like Penny had imagined. In her dreams, she’d envisioned everything from a quick peck on the cheek after he walked her home, to a feverish, tongue laden precursor to fucking. In actuality, it was gentle, yet firm, and despite the simplicity of it, the gesture was charged with more emotion than any kiss she’d had before. She didn’t even realize how lightheaded she was until they broke apart and she found herself gasping for breath.

She met Harry’s eyes and exhaled. “You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting for that.”

It was like the kiss had unleashed something lurking deep inside them both and Harry lunged towards her, pressing his lips against hers again and again and again, pushing her flat on the couch, the remnants of their milkshakes long forgotten. Penny tried to memorize every detail: the weight of his body against hers, the softness of his lips on hers, the silkiness of his hair as she ran her fingers through it. She tried to stay in the moment, but the sensation of his body rubbing against hers made it hard to not think about what would happen next.

“Ow!” Her head bumped uncomfortably against the arm of the couch as she slid down further.

“Are you alright?” Harry asked, pulling back and checking her for any harm. His lips were swollen and his curls were disheveled. “What’s wrong?”

“I just bumped my head.”

“I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s fine. Just a little cramped here.” Penny swallowed. “My bed might be more comfortable. If you’d like to move there.”

There was a heavy pause and Penny prayed she hadn’t misread the moment. Harry’s eyes glazed over as he processed what she said. “Um, yeah, that’s great. Lead the way.”

Penny breathed a sigh of relief as he climbed off of her and helped her stand, keeping his hand entwined with hers as they made the brief journey to Penny’s bedroom. She backed him up into the room, and Harry fell back on the bed. Penny climbed astride him, kissing him again and again and again, and she ground her center against his growing erection.

They’d waited for what felt like forever, but when they had nothing but time in front of them, there was no need to rush, even as Penny felt herself grow wetter with touch and caress. As Harry sucked kiss after kiss from her lips, she realized she’d never really thought about how hot kissing could be. Maybe it was just that she’d never been properly kissed, something Harry was working hard to rectify.

Harry wound his fingers in her hair gently pulling her head back to expose the column of her throat. He nipped at the sensitive skin, sucking a kiss from it before soothing the spot with his tongue. He repeated the process up and down her neck until his fingers fell to the hem of her shirt.

“Is it OK if I take this off?” he asked.

“Yes,” Penny said, guiding his hands as they pulled her t-shirt up and over her head. She unhooked her bra as he tossed the shirt aside. Her bra followed leaving her naked from the waist up.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said, absentmindedly rubbing his fingers up and down her side as his eyes took in every piece of her. “Come here.” He pulled her close and started kissing every inch of skin he could see. “So fucking beautiful.”

Penny shifted so one of Harry’s legs was nestled between hers, giving her the pressure she craved as Harry continued kissing her neck. After a few minutes she stopped him. “I’m going to take these off if that works?” she asked, gesturing to her jeans.

Harry nodded. “I should probably do the same.” He pulled his shirt off in one fluid motion and pulled his pants and briefs down next. Penny couldn’t help but stare.

“Stop it, I’m shy.”.

“You’ve got nothing to be shy about,” Penny said, trying not to let on exactly how impressed she was with what she saw in front of her.

Harry cleared his throat, and Penny couldn’t tell if the flush in his cheeks was a result of their activities or embarrassment. “Do you have a condom?” he asked.

“Oh, yeah. There’s probably one around here somewhere.” Penny opened the drawer of her bedside table and dug through the mess. “That one is expired,” she said, tossing it to the waste basket. “And this one is….” she squinted to read the date. “Still good! We’re in the clear.” Harry laughed and it was her turn to blush. “What can I say, it’s been awhile since I needed one.”

“No judgment as I’ve also been in a bit of a dry spell.” Harry took the condom from her and adjusted himself and Penny watched. She was still in shock that this was actually happening and was half convinced that she’d wake up from this dream any minute.

“Penny?”

“Oh, sorry! Did you say something?”

“I just asked how you want to do this?” Harry asked. “What’s usually best for you?”

“Oh…” Penny wasn’t sure if she’d ever had a partner ask her about her preference so directly, especially on the first hook up. She scoured her brain trying to think of what she actually liked and what wouldn’t be too intense for what could just be a casual hook up. “Um, usually just missionary is fine. But I also like to be on my knees occasionally.” She cleared her throat. “What about you?”

“I’m going to be honest with you, Penny, I think anything with you would get me across the finish line.” One look at his cock and she knew he wasn’t lying. She hopped up on the bed and got on her knees without a second thought.

Penny could feel Harry lining himself up with her as she braced her hands against the headboard. It had been a minute since her bed had seen this much activity and she prayed the IKEA frame would hold up. Harry dragged his tip over her and she squirmed with the anticipation of what would happen next. The first thrust caught her off guard and she pitched forward.

“Careful,” Harry said. His voice was soft, but its usual gentleness had been replaced by something harder. “Do you need me to stop?”

“Please, no,” Penny panted. He’d reached a spot deep inside on just one thrust and she just needed a minute to adjust to him. The burn of him inside her was unmatched, the perfect combination of pain and pleasure. Harry had wrapped one arm around her waist holding her steady as she adjusted, lightly tracing abstract patterns over her skin. “OK, you can go,” she half whispered, half moaned.

Harry anchored his hands on her hips as he thrust in and out in a painstakingly slow rhythm. It was torture – for the both of them – Penny presumed, and she felt the beginnings of an orgasm building inside of her. She could feel the pressure of his hand against her hip, knowing it would leave a bruise tomorrow, a thought that turned her on even more. Harry moved his hand up her body, settling on her breast and rolling her nipple as he increased the pace of his thrusts. It was all consuming, but Penny still needed more. She reached down to stroke her clit, the bud already tender and slippery with arousal. She was close, she could feel it. Just one more stroke and –.

“Can we –?” Harry asked breathlessly as he attempted to flip Penny onto her back. “I want to see you. I need to see you.” Penny complied, her body pliant in his arms as he placed her gently on her back before ducking down for a deep kiss as he locked his fingers with hers.

He pulled away and gently pushed inside of her, eyes not leaving hers. Even if she wanted to, Penny wasn’t sure she could look away. She was transfixed by what she saw in front of her. Harry’s skin and hair were damp from exertion, and the curls she’d been playing with earlier were pressed against his forehead. She could feel the tremble of his muscles and when she buried her nose in his neck, she got a whiff of the scent that could only be described as Harry.

“Are y-you close?” Harry asked as his hips stuttered.

“Yeah, I am.”

“Can you come for me, baby? I need you to.”

It could have been Harry calling her baby or it could have been the feeling of him rubbing against her clit or it could have just been the intense passion she felt between them, but Penny pitched over the edge, moaning Harry’s name as she fell.

“That’s it, baby,” he moaned, as he spilled into the condom. “That’s it. So fucking good.”

He fell forward, resting his full weight on her as they lay there. He pressed kisses against every bit of skin his mouth could reach and she raked her fingers up and down his back and through his hair. Penny didn’t know how long they lay there like that but even when she felt their sweaty skin start to stick together she made no effort to move.

She wasn’t letting Harry go ever again.

***

When Penny woke up, Harry’s arm was heavy around her waist and she could feel his breath on her back. He radiated heat and despite the uncomfortable stickiness of the sweat that covered her, she made no effort to move. She had no idea how to define what had happened last night – and again in the early hours of the morning – but she knew she didn’t want this to be the end.

She could feel Harry stir behind her and she carefully twisted around in his arms to sneak another look at him. He was so peaceful when he slept, his hair a tangled mess on the pillow. He snored lightly, almost like a whistle, and he was most definitely a cuddler. She closed her eyes and sighed contentedly, lulled back to sleep by the gentle rhythm of Harry’s breathing, only to be jolted awake by the sound of her alarm.

Harry slowly opened his eyes, squinting against the faint light that was trickling in through the curtains. He looked around, getting his bearings before smiling at Penny as she silenced the alarm.

“Sorry,” she whispered. “I usually don’t have to worry about waking anyone else up.”

“It’s not a problem,” he slurred, his voice still thick with sleep. “Should probably be getting up now anyways.”

“You could stay for breakfast,” Penny offered, hoping she wasn’t misreading the situation. “I make a mean egg and cheese and have beans from the coffee shop down the block.”

“I’d love nothing more than that.” Harry leaned in and gave her a quick peck on the lips, before rolling over to grab his phone. The gesture felt so normal, as if he’d done it every morning.

“Shit,” he laughed. “I’m going to have a lot to explain today.”

“What’s wrong?”

He angled his phone so that Penny could read the screen. It was filled with messages from Tom, Tommy, and Jeff. “I told them I was planning to see you and they were very supportive of that decision. I think they’ll be thrilled with this development.”

“Which is…?” Penny asked, testing the waters.

“Us being together.” Harry’s eyes widened at Penny’s noticeable silence. “Unless I’ve completely misread this.”

“No, no, no.” Penny leaned over to kiss him. “I want that. Us, I mean. I just didn’t think you’d want me after everything.”

“You’re absolutely insane for thinking that, Penny. I’ve been waiting my entire life for you and I’m not letting you get away again.” Penny reached for his hand, squeezing it tightly, knowing that there were no words she could say to accurately convey how she felt in that moment. “Now come on,” Harry said. “You mentioned something about a breakfast sandwich?”

Harry looked perfectly at home in her kitchen as she directed him on where to find the ingredients for their breakfast. They moved through the small space as if executing a perfectly coordinated dance routine neither of them had been taught, before sitting down at Penny’s table to eat together.

“What do you have planned for today?” Harry asked.

“Well, I’m going to go to work and then I’m going to head home.”

“No shows?”

“Not tonight.”

“Well,” Harry said, dabbing the corner of his mouth with a napkin. “I would like to take you out. On a proper date. Could I pick you up at the office? Say around six?”

“It’s a date,” Penny said, smiling from ear to ear.

When the breakfast dishes had been washed and dried and Harry had donned his clothes from the night before, they lingered by the front door, not wanting to say goodbye.

“A kiss for the road?” Harry asked. Penny stood on her tiptoes and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. “I’ll see you later then,” he said, unlocking the door.

“Harry?” she asked, suddenly bashful. “You don’t have to answer, but what made you give me another chance?” He was so quiet, she wasn’t sure he had heard her.

“It was your article,” he finally said, turning back to look at her. “You got me with the last line.”

***

A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who has read this far and has stuck with this story despite its infrequent updates. This one was really personal for me to write so I greatly appreciate all of the ten people who have read this. 🫶🏻 Would love to hear what you think of the end!

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publicaciones-sin-sentido · 1 year

Text

Task Force 141 + König, Alejandro y Rudy x Drunk Female Reader

You're at the New Year's party and you've had too much to drink… but that turned out to be something positive.

Captain John Price.

Since he is the leader, he feels that his duty is to get you to safety, he sees it almost as a mission, “Escort Y/n home”.

The headache is minimal but it's there, you toss and turn in bed, you shouldn't have taken that much, but you rarely do this kind of thing so…why not?, you turned again trying to find a comfortable position, but it was useless, the clarity of the day will no longer allow you to sleep.

-How much more are you going to squirm sleepyhead?- You open your eyes surprised.

-Captain Price?!- you get up. Your captain is in your house… in your room, in your bed… and without a shirt, you soon realize that you are naked.

-What happened last night?- you yell, lifting the sheet to cover your breasts.

Price looks at you with some amusement-Don't you remember?-One of his hands travels and rests on your lips, which are sensitive, you don't even want to suspect why.

You strain your mind…and the memories come flooding in, Price carrying your body to your apartment, your shameless flirting, the way you told him you liked him and what you wanted him to fuck you all night.

With horror you take your hands to your face, you look at him -I will present my resignation Sir, this was my fault, there is no need for the high command to find out.- You are planning at a thousand an hour how to solve this problem.

-Calm down, soldier, perhaps you see me upset about what happened… It was a matter of time before the sexual tension exploded.

-Captain, aren't you upset?- You see him shake his head, his gaze lowered to your covered breasts, -Last night you called me Price, I think that here we can skip the formality of the army, don't you think sweetie.- And with that they once again have a round of sex, in which you said his name several times.

What a great way to start the year.

John "Soap" McTavish

-Y/n you should stop drinking, you're pretty drunk already- Soap grabs the beer from your hand. Annoyed, you take it from him and take another sip, -Make me detergent!- Someone bursts out laughing behind you and you can't help but laugh, "Gaz has a contagious laugh"

-Soap take her home and make sure our girl doesn't do stupid things- Price shakes his head.

-Captain noooo- you complain. -You heard the orders- Soap almost drags you out of the bar.

You open your eyes seeing the daylight filter through the windows, you get up and when you sit down you give a little gasp, you're naked, you don't remember taking your clothes off last night, but you were drunk so, it doesn't matter, it still seemed strange to you.

The smell of pancakes makes you look at your bedroom door, it's open.. you always sleep with the door locked, “another drunken mistake?” You look at the room, everything seems normal, except that the bed is very messy, and then you see it on your nightstand, an open package of condoms.

With only the sheet you go out to where you hear noise and to your surprise Jhon is in your kitchen, preparing breakfast, you look at him and he notices your presence.

-You woke up!-He comes to meet you and kisses you passionately then you remember, last night… everything you did together.

-What's wrong beautiful?- Soap asks.

-I am still sleeping? I think I'm dreaming, I didn't think you felt the same as me-

Soap smiles and picks you up leaving you on the table -You know I'm hungry, I think I'm going to get an extra helping of honey before I eat the pancakes- with that he buried his face between your legs. You gasp because it's like a forest fire ripping through your core.

-As much as you want!- you yell between gasps.

Simon "Ghost" Riley

-Are you sure? If I start I won't stop and there is no going back, remember that…

-Choices have consequences, I know, I want this, I've wanted you for a long time!- you gasp, clinging to a big man in a dark room.

With those words in mind awake, the barely visible light sneaks through a crack in the window. You sat up suddenly gasping for the pain you felt between your legs, it was strange, but at the same time a pleasant pain. Your mind is very confused, you take off the sheet, soon you see red marks all over your body, -Are they bitten?!- you gasp. Out of nowhere someone is on top of you, when you turn and see Ghost's mask, you know, you know what happened.

Well, he was a rude and very passionate lover.

-Well, shall we continue where we left off last night?- You feel his member hard against your buttocks.

-Yes!- He slapped you hard on your butt- Yes… what?- You gasp from the sting and soon you get wet.

-Yes, Lieutenant Ghost!- His fingers travel to your wet folds and begin a slow massage

-Good Girl- you find yourself gasping and begging for his touch, and he gives it to you, he's nothing mean when it comes to Give you pleasure.

Kyle “Gaz” Garrick

You wake up lying on something warm but also something hard. Then I feel strong arms surround you. You open your eyes and there he is, your teammate Gaz, looking at you sleepily and happily. -Good morning sweetie- he leaves a kiss on your mouth and you melt against it- So… do you want us to continue with this… see how far we get?- you're a little too happy.

-I want us to get to the sweet end, I'm not one of those who only have casual things, what do you say?- You get up and straddle his lap- I say that this will be my new way to start the day, if it is Sounds good to you Gaz- his hands squeeze your waist and he begins to move to feel the heat of your tight core- Kyle, here you will call me Kyle- he emphasizes his words, thrusting harder.

-Kyle…fuck me like last night-

-Copy honey- and he did, so much so that he had to help him get to the bathroom afterwards.

König

Although you are drunk, you realize that König doesn't like the atmosphere one bit, he remains stoic, but you know that he is going crazy inside, you take him by the hand and lead him out of the party, the poor man agrees to your whim to go to a party, but you couldn't stand there knowing that he was very unhappy.

-I thought you wanted to stay there- he looks at you a little confused, but not as tense as he was inside.

-Not if that makes you feel uncomfortable, we're a team, good and bad!- The alcohol continues to work in your system, you hit your chest right on the heart twice, a usual greeting between you, but you stagger and he hits you. grab before you fall. He sighs, -I'll take you home.- Your little steps were starting to annoy him, since his were tremendously longer. Without saying anything to you, I lift you up and load you onto your back.

You scream because of the height, -Don't let go or I'll be very angry- but you don't help much since you kick while you laugh.

-I'm never… going to let you go- König suffocates a little under his mask and hooded sweatshirt.

You get home where he arranges for you to drink some cold water, he looks for a shirt and pants for you to change into.

-Wos, if that's how you are as a friend, I can't imagine as a Boyfriend…- you stumbled over your words -how come you're still single? Or do you have a girlfriend? I'll get jealous because I love you but I'm a coward to say it- you adhered to him like chewing gum on the hot pavement- Don't have a girlfriend König, let me make my moves to seduce you!!- before thinking a little more you were already grabbing him by the shoulders to kiss him.

König was petrified, even though Y/n was very drunk, he believed every word he said, the signs had been there for a long time, but clouded by negative thoughts, he had never dared to believe that he might have a chance. with this incredible woman, tough as steel in the combats and missions they had been on together, and the next sweet and gentle when they found a scared civilian or even hostage caught in the crossfire.

He would not let this opportunity go. He hugged Y/n's small figure and slammed it against her chest, the scent of the shampoo wafting from her and tickling her nose. Her ice-cold eyes widened with a new determination. He picked her up in her arms and laid her on the bed and lay down next to her, pulling her blanket over him. Y/n fell asleep, König left a caress on her cheek, -Don't worry Liebe, (love) I couldn't fall in love with someone else, you are already der Besitzer meines Herzens- (the owner of my heart)

The next morning...

-Sorry!- Y/n apologized to König -You had to stay here seeing that I didn't do anything stupid in my drunken state, I'll reward you!- König smiled, barely since he didn't do it often , but it was a genuine smile. -Don't worry about it klein (small)-his big hand left a caress on his hair.

Blushing Y/n nodded -Come let's prepare breakfast, it's the least I can offer you- with the passing of the hours König learns to smile more naturally.

Alejandro Vargas

-Give me another Tequila!- you scream in ecstasy, the happiness provided by the alcohol roaring through your veins.

-Tranquila dulce (Calm down, sweetie)- Alejandro tries to make you sit down - It was enough for tonight-. Alejandro took you to your room, since you were the only woman on the team, you had the privilege of having your room separated from the others.

But it wasn't, you wanted more alcohol, but you were refused, however, you had this man with you, and you weren't going to waste that, you took off your shirt-

-What are you doing?- You laugh at his surprised face.

-I know how you look at me Alejandro, come on give me an unforgettable night- your hands traveled to his belt.

-No, señorita cálmese (miss calm down), you'll regret this in the morning- You keep trying to make him take off his belt.

-I know what I want-

-You're drunk, no way, go to sleep, I'll see you in the morning-

Disappointed at being rejected, you find yourself furious -You're not that good!- You go to bed angry, and somehow you fall asleep.

There is a deafening noise, as if thunder crashed against your door, you get up, the mist of alcohol now vanished, you look at the clock 7 in the morning, they dial their red numbers. "It had better be worth it it's my day off" you grumble.

When you open the door Alejandro rushed in like a gale, grabbed your wrists and caged you against the wall with his hard body, he kicked the door shutting them in.

Was it true last night was it a product of alcohol?

-Uh… what about last night?- Do you remember your pathetic attempt to seduce him -Well, the alcohol gave me the courage to express it in a clumsy way… but it wasn't a joke- your cheeks are red, you're dying of embarrassment.

- Gracias a Dios (Thank God)- with that he kisses you like a starving man, his hands touching all the right places and you melt against him. “Thanks Tequila”

Rodolfo “Rudy” Parra

-He Cielito Lindo(beautiful sky)- Rudy gently touches your shoulder, you were a bit sleepy, the euphoria of the alcohol left you draining your energy.

-Umm Rudy?- You barely keep your eyes open.

-Yes, bonita (pretty), I think you're out of combat, the boys left looking for more party encouraged by Alejandro- you hear Rudy move but you can't open your eyes to see what he does.

One moment you feel heavy and the next it's like you're floating on clouds, confused you open your eyes, maybe that's how it feels to enter an ethylic coma.

But none of that, Rudy was carrying in his arms. -Rudy, no! -You look at him with your mouth open- You'll hurt your back, get off me, I'll walk- you move a little, but you get dizzy and your head falls against his shoulder. You hear him laugh, and you can smell the scent of him, sweat, but not unpleasant, a masculine scent, you can't describe it, but there it is.

-You are as light as a tamal-

-Are you comparing me to a meal?- You want to seem offended but you fail.

-The tamales are my favorites- he looks into your eyes and there is something that escapes you in his gaze.

-Do you want to devour me like a tamale Rudy?- a mischievous question escapes before you can censor it.

-With all my being, Cielito Lindo- he stops short… he looks at you and his eyes are as open as yours, suddenly you're not sleepy, a dark desire has replaced him.

-Is this a joke?- you ask breathlessly.

-Yes! … but if you want it's not a joke- he swallowed with difficulty, nervous for your answer.

You wrap your arms around his neck- Show me then how you're going to devour me- you leave a kiss on his lips, barely a peck.

Rudy smiles, showing all his teeth in the process, he throws you over his shoulder and runs off to his room.

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imperatriceauxdiamants · 2 years

Note

tips on having an organized life and staying organized. ex: your space like closet & room as well as mentally

Random out of order thoughts popping up:

(Context: I'm a ex-hoarder teen turned borderline minimalist adult)

Get it done as soon as possible. peace of mind is priceless and you will wish you did it earlier. So might as well get it done now without derping around.

Try thinking of the ideal lifestyle you want to acheive. What is Ideal You doing in her life? How is her schedule? Her lifestyle? Imagine. Then you got a good goal to acheive, a WHY to your process.

Physical clutter equals to mental clutter. Mental clutter equals to physical clutter. Attack both at the same time. Eliminate stressors from your life. Simplify your routines to the essential. Simplify to a level you feel HAPPY in.

Do NOT minimize to a level where you become UNCOMFORTABLE because of lack. You aren't in some survival show. It is daily life, not catastrophe re-creation.

Limit your organization tools to only a few simple ones. To the point. No need for 5 or 6 schedules, stick to one. Get ALL your organization in one spot. For me it's Google Agenda and mirror stickies for next day reminders.

If you have tasks, target to make them a daily, weekly or monthly routine. It makes easier, liberates mental space for better opportunities. My Saturdays are cleaning days. My Sundays are art days. My Fridays are spin-down evernings. My Mondays are "Do as muc of the week's work so the rest of the week goes smoothly". I never really change from that basic routine. Some days I may change things up (Parties, unplanned stuff, emergencies) but I try to at least MAINTAIN my routine. I pace my brain's pace that way. Human braisn freaking love routine, they THRIVE in it. I am not different, neither are you.

The stuff that can be repaired then routinely worn? Go repair it RIGHT NOW. If you aren't going to fix/repair within the week, give it away or trash it. If you can't do it now, it's gonna occupy mental space and make your mindspace cluttered. See the physical clutter equals mental clutter point earlier.

Start with trash first, then clothes, and papers. All three are major sources of clutter. It WILL be time-consumpting. But it is normal.

Why are hotels so fun? Because everything is to the point. And is designed for extremely easy cleanup. Only a FEW decorative items. Everything in small baskets. Minimal laundry (only sheets, towels, maybe curtains). And when you go sleep in hotels you only bring the most essential stuff. The stuff you need NOW. Then... how about trying to recreate that hotel feel at home?

Try to EMPTY first before buying more. If that face cream is not really efficient, downgrade it to a body cream. Empty the shampoo and conditioner bottle before buying more. Empty the toothpaste before buying more. Once it comes close to become empty, write the item on the shopping list. You DO NOT need 5 of a kind. if you don't know where such item is, it is an issue. Not some "silly mistake". Reorganize your stuff until you find the stuff you needed. You DO NOT buy more.

On the same vein, same thing for food. Only stock up on the ESSENTIALS (highly dependent from one household to another, for me it's flour, pasta, broth, onions, potato, squash, rice) when they are on sale. Only buy as you go and try to EMPTY the food unless it's spoiled. Do not buy another pot of yogurt if there's already two in your fridge sorta thing.

Obviously, if the product you did buy is ultimately shitty and can't be repurposed for something else, or it is expired, make yourself a favor and get rid of it.

The reason people accumulate clutter, shop excessively, accumulate food, are scared to get rid of stuff, in my honest personal opinion, is related to a fear of the future, an insecurity. Our behavior is a reflection of the mindset we are in. A fear of losing everything, a fear of stepping lower, a fear of lacking. Work on rationalizing those things and BECOME ACTUALLY PREPARED instead of constantly worrying. Once prepped, let it GO. It is gonna be fine. You are prepared.

A well maintained household with less stuff will go through things better than an overwhelmed household.

One lady I used to know hoarded food, she had 6 fridges chokeful of food (frozen, not frozen) and she stocked even more in dry goods. The consequence of this stuff on her that I did observe is that she became overwhelmed by the whole situation, thus increasing her fears, her insecurity. Then it became a vicious cycle. She bought more to allieviate her fears, more food went to waste due to rot and freezer burn, more of her money went to the gutter.

Even is hoarding is an extreme example, we can have some lessons from that (hard and emotionnally difficult) situation and reflect on our own situation. Another thing is that we UNDERESTIMATE the clutter we have. We think it ain't so bad, until we clean it up and realize how shitty it was.

Books in order of relevance: Digital Minimalism, Deep Work, The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, The Power of Habit.

#cleanup #declutter #minimalism #glowup #marie kondo #levelup

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apomaro-mellow · 1 year

Text

Part 3

Actually making his way through the grasses was pretty easy once he got started. And soon, Steve's spirits were back up again. He was dry now too so he was feeling much better. Still, he wasn't quite sure where he was going. He knew of the cardinal directions, but he didn't know where exactly his house lied.

"Maybe I should've read more books on geography", he said to himself, kicking a stray pebble.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?", a smooth voice was heard from further down the path. But it was very oily sort of smooth.

Steve looked up and saw a very sharply dressed beetle. Something about him said bad news.

"I'm just a person trying to get home", Steve said, attempting to walk around with minimal contact when they got close.

The beetle grabbed his hand and twirled him around until his back was against the stem of a mushroom.

"What's the hurry? This neck of the woods gets real fun after dark. William Hargrove's the name. But pretty boys like you can call me Billy."

"Okay, Billy", Steve said as he shoved him away. "It was nice meeting you, but I've gotta get going." The sleave was rolling off him in waves and Steve needed to get away.

"Don't be in such a rush, princess. I know how to show you a good time~" He grabbed Steve's hand and kissed the back of it. An action that when Eddie did it, made him melt. Now he felt ice cold and like he needed a bath. Especially when Billy started to kiss up his arm.

"You're-!", Steve snatched his arm away. "Being awfully familiar. I don't even know you."

"I've told you my name already Toots, try to keep up."

"Toots?"

"Listen, you shouldn't be goin' home. The place to be is with me. And where I'm going someone like you could take center stage."

Steve raised a brow. "Me on a stage? Doing what?"

"With the face like yours, who gives a shit?"

It was official. He didn't like this guy. But beetles did have wings so...

"What if in exchange for performing, you fly me...up there", he pointed to a tree. From up there, he could see if he was getting anywhere close to home.

"Heh, pretty big order. You gonna sing big too?"

"Not sure what that means~", Steve said in a sing-song voice. "But if we have a deal~?"

He held out his hand which Billy took without a thought and pulled him into his arms. Was he actually going to get somewhere in his journey?

"I'll take you on a flight, pretty boy. But we're gonna go where I want."

Steve let out a gasp as they lifted into the air. Of course it couldn't be that easy. And Billy flew so fast and so wild, Steve couldn't even tell up from down, much less try and see if his house was in sight. After the trip, he was so disoriented, he didn't quite know what was going on until someone tried to take off his shirt.

That brought him back to reality and he shooed everyone out of the room, sort of swept up in the preparation. He realized he was in a dressing room and if the mannequin in the corner was any indication, that was his outfit for the evening. Steve let out a sigh. Didn't feel like he had much of a choice.

Maybe Billy would be more accommodating once he went through with this. He'd been keeping up his end after all.

"Just hope he doesn't expect a perfect performance with zero rehearsal."

Thankfully, Billy had kept to one part of his word. He really didn't have to do anything but stand on the stage and look pretty. Pretty being in an outfit that had him looking more insectoid, antenna and butterfly like wings to match. Even Steve had to admit that it felt a little nice to simply stand there and bask in the adoration of a bunch of strangers in the crowd.

It didn't quite feel the same as the way Eddie looked at him, or complimented him, but it was something. Then Billy twirled him too hard and the costume came apart. The next thing Steve heard was a bunch of boos.

To those with hard exoskeletons and feelers, Steve was much too squishy looking to be considered attractive. And it shouldn't have surprised him when Billy flipped like a coin.

"Sorry princess. Guess you're just too ugly."

That....that had cut a lot deeper than Steve had expected. He kept his eyes down as he was booed off stage and changed back into his own clothes, feeling delirious with emotion. No one even glanced at him as he left the club.

Night had completely fallen, which meant Eddie would've already came and went. He could've decided that Steve wasn't worth his time and wasn't even looking for him. Steve found a young tree to climb up onto and sit on a branch.

It was only a few feet of the ground but after being kidnapped, swimming, then drowning, walking for hours, and not a single meal to show for it, he was exhausted.

"Hey, you're still out here", Dustin said as he landed on the branch.

"Yeah I'm still here", Steve replied, not feeling up to conversation with a baby bird right now.

But Dustin must have been more empathetic then he seemed, because he just looked at him for a moment. "What's wrong? What happened?"

Apparently that was all it took because now the floodgates were opened. "I'm so, so tired. I'm hungry. And that-! That beetle!" His anger deflated as the last couple of hours caught up with him. "He said I was ugly", he said, voice full of dejection.

......"Is that it?"

"Dustin, just shut up. You don't understand."

"You're right. I don't. So he called you ugly, so what? Do you believe him?"

"It's not that simple-"

"It actually is. Did you feel flattered when those toads wanted to marry you?"

"No."

"And if the beetle wanted to marry you?"

"Barf."

"What if the fairy prince wants to?"

The way Steve's shoulders went up and he looked away with a look in his eyes that was both bashful and dreamy was all the answer Dustin needed.

"Alright then, that's settled. Eddie thinks you're pretty. S'all that matters." Dustin settled into Steve's side like he belonged there. His downy feathers were both soft and warm, perfect for a night that was starting to get cold.

"As for your hunger, I'll teach you how to forage tomorrow. It's about time you got some survival skills." Then Dustin let out a chirpy yawn and was almost immediately asleep. Steve decided to go with it and fell asleep next to him.

--------------------------

Despite Steve's worries, Eddie was indeed looking for him, diligently in fact. He flew on Honey's back even as the autumnal gusts blew them both around and tossed orange leaves their way.

Every time he thought about Steve out there alone, it spurred him on. He had promised his mother that he would bring her son home.

Whenever he thought back to that night, he thought of what-ifs. The biggest one, what if he didn't leave and instead just stayed over for the next few hours just talking? Eddie would've been fine with that, even if his Uncle Wayne found them. Maybe they would've even done more than talking. Eddie certainly wouldn't have turned away from a kiss.

He was so lost in that thought, it was only thanks to Honey that they didn't collide with an old well.

"Thanks Hon. And sorry. Gotta focus. Gotta focus."

When he found Steve he was never letting him go.

A/N: Steve and Thumbelina are actually the same character in that they are constantly put into situations and judged on superficial features and in this essay I will

Part 5

Tag team:

@telidina

@novelnovella

@ajeff855

@mars-the-witch

@ceejay-955

@punctualhowell

@child-of-cthulu

@estrellami-1

@cupcakesnwhiskey

@spectrum-spectre

#apo writes #stranger things #fanfiction #steddie #thumbelina au #steve harrington #i am in fact a lover of harringrove #but billy is perfectly greasy for the beetle

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momolady · 2 years

Text

Commissions are now open to the public! Slots available for August, September, and October!

From now on all commission inquiries will be handled via email. That brand new email is [email protected]. Below is a format I wish you to follow so that the commission you want is assured, and I will have all information needed in order to complete the job easily, smoothly, and stress free. If further discussions are needed, we can do so via discord.

My main goal with this is to make commissions easier for everyone! I want the process to be a joy and as less frustrating as possible. I want us to build something together so the best possible story is created.

(Please also be mindful that these commissions will start in August)

Basic commissions: 1.50 cent per word. (ex: $45 is 3k words)

The basic usual fair. A self insert reader or a simple ‘you’ reader. Describe the monster you want, basic plot outline, and simple wants for the story and outcome. Usually requires minimal research and prep on my end, and the story is probably mostly fluff, meet cute, etc. If free reign is given to me, your author, you will be guaranteed extra word count for my enjoyment.

Smut Commissions: 2 cent per word. (ex: $60 is 3k)

This includes more complex details and requests, these may be stories that feature original characters or that deal with a more involved storyline, plot, character work, and word count. This includes plots and characters that may require extra research on my end. This also takes into account that these complex stories may include word overflow (I know they do, I know how I work., as well time discussing and working out things may take.

Discounts are available on most of Patreon reward tiers. And people who have commissioned me more than five times will receive and friends and family discount as well.

I will also only accept payments made in USD. I feel that is fair, considering I have been lenient about this in the past. I have let friendship and my own kindness allow me to be taken advantage of, and I am tired of it. Payment, as always, is due in advance, and you can pay as soon as you like (5% discount if you pay right away). Payments will be made via p*yp*l and I will send an invoice when you are ready. If p*yp*l isn’t an option for you, we will discuss that in advance.

I do not mind you being as vague or as detailed as you want. I do suggest you get all your details out in one go, as we can discuss them quickly and easily. If things change, that is fine too, just make sure to tell me advanced enough it won’t hinder the production of your story. What I request is that you do not bombard me with requests, ask, and details over and over and over again. The more this happens the more I tend to get anxious and stressed about the story. Once details are agreed upon then they are considered final. Any changes made a week before will not be accepted. Also, stories that require a lot of detail and research will have a higher price point. I have bent over backwards and worked myself to the bone on stories like these, and I think it’s time I am paid for it. I also ask that anything you want for the story does not alter or bend the rules of the universes you want them set in, such as Hearthway Hollow, Ruby Empire, and Miror. These are my worlds and I have specific things in place for them, if you feel the need to play God, please discuss it with me beforehand and we can see if we can reach something amicably.

Be prepared to hear ‘no’ from me. In the past I have not put my foot down and I have ended up uncomfortable or unsure about things. There are certain topics, kinks, and creatures I will not write, but I am very happy to work with you to come to something that will satisfy your needs.

I will start asking for extra pay if extensive edits are needed. If there are whole chunks that need rewritten or paragraphs you wanted added, I am going to have to charge for them, although it will be cheaper than the regular cost per word. If it’s something that is truly my mistake (like if I wrote the wrong monster or something), it will be discussed.

I ask that you trust me as a writer to do what is best. If I twist something or request something goes another way, it is me wanting to give you the best experience for your story and not disregarding your wants for the story at all. Usually when this happens I will discuss it with you and double check to make sure it is ok.

Commission Inquiry Form:

Make sure to include as much as possible! If your desired story needs a lot of details, give as much as needed. If you want to leave something more simple and trust me with the details, make sure to say that too. This will also decide which commission price comes into play. When you send the email please make the topic Commission Inquiry.

What is your budget? (either list a price or the word count you want)

Reader Character Gender:

Reader Character Description:

Monster Character:

Monster Character Description:

Is this NSFW or SFW?

Any kinks, tropes, or specifics?

Story Outline:

Other thoughts or comments:

Commission Prices:

Now here comes the FAQ:

Do you have a word limit?

Considering how many commissions I get, I will not be accepting commissions under 3000 words. It hasn’t come up, but I just wanted it to be known. Smaller commissions are extremely hard for me to do. The bigger the commission the better for me, it’s a lot easier.

Why do you have a preferred word count?

3000 words is my favorite fic to do. It has enough to build characters and relationships as well as have enough room for smut or anything extra you request.

My story’s at 3502 words! Do I have to pay the extra pricing per word?

If a story goes over 500 words I’ll discuss with you what you’d like to do. But usually, extra word count is my bad, I get excited sometimes and have fun, and I don’t mind eating it.

I have this great idea for a novel…

I’m glad you have an idea, but no. I cannot write your novel for you. It isn’t fair to me, and it will probably cost you more than you are willing to pay. I have my own projects and novels to write. I can’t baby your dream as well as my own.

Will you write fanfiction on commission?

For the time being, no. But! If you’d be willing to work with me and create a ‘legally distinct’ original to compensate then lets talk!

I have a completely original character and would like you to write with them. Is this okay?

YES. But, Be prepared to give me a decent bio as well as their physical description and all the basic information I will need to bring your baby to life.

Can I have you write another chapter to one of your existing stories?

Yes! If the story was a commission though we will have to ask the original commissioner. If they approve then I will do it for you.

I want to give you free reign over the story. Is that ok?

Always! I love getting creative and going off in my own little world.

What kind of stories do you write?

I enjoy writing almost anything. I’m good at comedy and romance, but horror and psychological stories have become my guilty pleasure to write.I’m good with most anything, but there will be topics I will be unwilling to write. But this will all be discussed and approved when you contact me.

What won’t you write?

This is a better question to ask. I absolutely will not write anything involving scat, vore, children in sexual situations, or nonconsensual sexual acts. These are just major examples of things I am uncomfortable with. Also, I am NOT open to role plays, so don’t ask for those.

So how does this work?

Send me an email to [email protected] with your intent and a brief idea of what you want. Once I approve it we can discuss what length of story you want, what genre, what characters, and a loose outline. Payment will be given upfront. Until I receive payment I will not begin working on your commission.

Will you be showing my story off to everyone else?

Commissions will be yours and yours alone for up to a month. After that it will be posted to Patreon and a month after that it will go live on Tumblr. But having your commission and the feedback will help me build my portfolio for the future.

Food for Thought

Remember when that you are commissioning anyone, writer, artist, voice actor, musician, anyone, that you are not just paying for the product. You are also paying them for their time talking to you about what you want, you're paying for their research and study on whatever it is you want, you're paying them for double checking and making sure everything is ok with the product. More goes into the commissions you ask for than you think, so please be kind and considerate with commissioning anyone. Art takes time, patience, and a lot of love, and we want to give you the best bang for your dollar.

#exophilia #monster romance #monster boyfriend #monster girlfriend #monster fudger #monster x reader #monster x human #personal #momolady monsters #momolady commissions #commissions #writing commissions

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russobaby · 1 year

Text

Unexpected Revelations

Billy Russo x Unnamed Female OC

Warnings: Angsty & Fluffy; Fade to black; Fertility talks

Author’s Note: 2.5k Words; Minimal editing lol; First full length piece I’ve written for Billy Russo; This is just something small that took me forever to finish. Feedback always welcome (be nice pls i’m very sensitive) or any suggestions or prompts you’d like me to tackle!

▪️▫️▪️▫️▪️▫️▪️▫️▪️▫️▪️▫️

The silence on the car ride home was unsettling. Neither dared to speak the first word out of fear of further escalating the argument . Of all the things they could possibly disagree on this was by far the last thing she expected. She huffs out a breath as she stares out the window reminiscing on the last year of their relationship and where she could have missed the signs.

Thinking back to the conversation earlier that started all of this, she can’t help but feel a sense of dread at where their relationship might be headed.

They had just had a late dinner with Frank and Karen. With the perfect mood lighting and the intimacy of the booth they shared, the happy couple had just announced they were expecting and the four of them were riding that excitement high. In no uncertain terms she and Billy were first in line for the title of godparents.

“Oh goodness this is so exciting, so many baby preparations to make!” Karen beamed at them all. You couldn’t be happier for the pair. When you first met Billy he shared his worries for Frank, that he might never allow himself a chance at happiness again after losing Maria and the kids. This news made them proud of all the growth Frank had experienced with Karen’s unconditional support. Everything was going well until Frank led the conversation somewhere she was afraid they wouldn’t recover from.

“You know it would be nice for this little Castle to have a bud to grow up with him,” a tell-tale smirk on his face “What about you two, when’s a mini Russo coming along?”

Both her and Billy couldn’t help but steal a knowing glance at each other.

“Soon-”

“Never-”

She damn near gave herself whiplash when she turned to look at him, and Billy wore the same perplexed look. Frank and Karen could only stare mouths slightly ajar, noting the tension rapidly thickening until Billy finally spoke up.

“I’m sorry, what do you mean by never?” He was a bit offended at how appalled she seemed to be at the idea of having kids with him. Meanwhile her mind was running a mile a minute trying to figure out the best way to navigate this conversation, in public…in front of their closest friends.

“I just never thought about that being an option for us.” She slowly brings her hands closer to her fidgeting with the cloth napkin beside her plate.

“Not an option? I’ve told you you’re it for me, how do you get ‘not an option’ from that?”

“Maybe this isn’t a conversation we should be having right now Bill.” The finality in her tone only frustrates him more and he can't stop himself from egging it on.

“So you want kids just not with me?” A wounded expression surfaces on his face.

“What? No, that's not what I said!”

“Bill, don’t push it, I’m sorry I asked-” Frank and Karen are slowly growing more concerned.

“It’s fine Frankie, how would I have known otherwise that my girlfriend doesn’t see me as parental material.”

She knew he was hurt and that he wasn’t thinking before speaking but his words stung no less.

“You know that’s not true, you're putting words in my mouth.” This was not how she wanted to end their night, “Can we please just talk about this at home.” She pleaded with him.

The rest of their dinner fell into an uncomfortable silence. Frank and Karen kept exchanging worried glances while you and Billy avoided looking at each other. Thankfully they were in the middle of dessert so there wasn’t much after paying the bill and bidding goodnight to the other couple.

Now here they found themselves, in a tension so thick it was suffocating. She had no idea how she was going to make him see her decision had nothing to do with him and everything to do with her.

Walking into their home she falls into step behind him tossing her stuff at the entryway table. She hears him ruffling through the kitchen so she makes her way toward it with very careful steps. She was afraid of what this conversation would mean for them. His back is to her as he stands stoically just staring at the open beer right in front of him. She could use some liquid courage herself.

“Are we going to talk about this?” Her voice is barely above a whisper.

“What is there left to say?”

“I’d like to think there’s a lot left to say.” She can’t help but quip back.

“You’ve made your feelings about a family with me pretty clear.”

“Have I or are you just projecting and trying to make me the villain?”

Now she was getting mad. It was one thing to be hurt, it was another to insinuate she thought so lowly of him. After the time they’d spent together she’d hoped he knew her better than that.

“You haven’t even let me explain a thing.”

He finally spins around to face her.

“You said you didn’t see that being an option for us. For us.” His scoff is harsh. “That implies you don’t see a family with me.”

“Well what else was I supposed to think Billy, you’ve never talked about wanting children and the way you respond to anything regarding your childhood never leads me to believe it’s something you’re interested in.”

“Wouldn’t you think that because of the way I was raised I’d want a chance to prove I could do better?”

“How could I, you’ve never initiated any conversation about parenthood! Why should it fall on me to do so?”

“So you just assumed I wouldn’t want to be a father from that?”

An incredulous laugh slips out of her. Logically, what else was one supposed to assume from that?

“Well have you ever considered that maybe I’m the one that doesn’t want to be a mother?”

She hadn’t vocalized this to many people and even the few she’d never admitted it with such finality. That one sentence stunned them both. Finding a life partner is hard enough but finding someone who shares the same feelings regarding parenthood is even harder. She thought it had finally all worked out with Billy. He knew the true ugliness of the world and she was sure he shared her opinion on the matter. The world they lived in was no place for a new life, not one who may or may not even have a livable planet or the most despicable people leading it.

Her confession hangs heavy between them and she finally sees the harshness in his expression soften.

“Were you ever gonna talk to me ‘bout this?”

“I’ve never known how to bring it up.” She sighs, “It’s not exactly an easy or ideal topic of conversation.”

“I get that but c'mon, we’re supposed to be a partnership here.” He can’t keep the frustration out of his tone. “We’re supposed to be able to tell each other anything.”

“I just-” she starts “My whole life that’s the one thing everyone has just always expected of me as a woman.”

As she crosses her arms Billy can’t help but notice her shrink further into herself backed into the counter as far from him as she can be. He could physically see the weight such an admission held.

“There have been so many instances where I’ve confided my feelings to people and all I get is ‘You can always change your mind’ or ‘That’s such a big decision to make so young’, like at what point in my life is it acceptable to make this decision?” Her own frustration grows.

“When it’s made for me? When it’s too late but then everybody assumes I have this massive regret? There’s just no winning and quite frankly I’m so over the emotional toll these conversations take and the unnecessary guilt for not adhering to some archaic gender expectation.”

She had been called every possible thing whenever she told people she wasn’t sure about kids. People called her ungrateful for having the ability when so many women wish they could. Others would say it was selfish to choose herself and her body. She knew Billy would never, but after being on the receiving end of these comments from people she thought she could confide in, some small part in her brain was always on guard.

He can see all her emotional walls going up at the possibility of him rejecting her for this, which is a laughable thought to him. There were very few things she could do that would drive him to do something like that. This was most definitely not one of those things.

A highlight of having spent such a long time together was knowing when her distress called for a certain response from him. Clearly this was a moment that required comfort and despite his feelings about her omission, there was no way he would ever deny her what she needed. So with very careful steps Billy approaches, gently wrapping his arms around her.

Letting herself fall into the embrace was too easy but she wasn’t going to beat herself up for caving so quickly, not when 30 minutes ago she was dreading the direction this relationship was heading in.

“I won’t say I’m not upset you kept this from me.” He sighs, “But I get it.”

He really did understand, he knew about her insecurities regarding her relationship with family and feeling like an outcast for not following the same paths as them. He would never imagine throwing them in her face.

“I’m sorry for assuming, there’s no way you could’ve known without me sharing and considering I do see us spending our lives together I should’ve communicated that from the beginning.” Neither of them could understand how they’d gone so long without this topic of conversation even coming up.

“No, I’m sorry for blowing up.” Guilt creeps into his voice. “You were right I was projecting and the last thing I want you to feel like is a villain when it comes to decisions that affect you as a whole.”

A new guilty feeling begins to settle in her.

“I don’t want you to have to choose between your desire for a family and me.” As much as it pained her she could never take that opportunity away from him and she loved him too much to do so. She was sure of her choice and in the same way she wouldn’t let anybody take it from her; she wasn’t going to take it from him.

This prompts a whole new fear in him.

“Now hold on, before you go making any self sacrificing rash move I need you to listen closely.” He cradles her face close to his in hopes she fully grasps what he’s about to say.

Before he can get a word in she cuts him off.

“Billy, don't make this decision because of me, please really think about what you’re going to say because I can’t bear you hating me in the future.”

“Would you just listen to me?” He huffs.

“Sorry.” She averts her eyes.

“Look at me.” He waits for her to bring her gaze back to his. “If it comes down to having to choose to spend my life with you versus anything else, I will always choose you .” The certainty in his voice sends a chill down her spine and her subtle shiver makes him smile. She presses her body closer to his which queues a shiver of his own.

It was like a movie montage of their entire relationship played back in her mind. Meeting for the first time at the coffee shop down the street from her old apartment, gushing to Karen about the craziness of having a meet-cute, Billy charming the hell out of her on their first date that it felt too good to be true. Maybe in the back of her brain she was always just waiting for the other shoe to drop and of course Billy being an absolute dream was reassuring her in all the right ways.

They stand there in silence simply holding each other for several minutes. Finally, he breaks the silence.

“I need to know you understand what I mean when I say that.” He caresses her face.

She leans into the touch basking in all the love he so freely gave her. Billy never failed to make her feel like the center of his universe, and she appreciated it so much. To be loved so openly and unconditionally felt so good. To have someone understand her so wholly and be so secure in what she has with someone.

“I do…I think”

“No, none of that think shit, I need to hear you say you understand.” His demand is subsided by the soft sway of his thumb against her cheek and she can’t help the light giggle that spills out.

“Yes Billy, I understand.”

He sighs in contentment leaning down to kiss her, equal parts passionate and languid trying to convey as much of his love as he could into it. Whenever he kissed her like that she felt ready and willing to give him anything he asked, too hypnotized by the buzz running through her body to refuse him. She can’t help throwing her arms around him, pressing herself as close as physically possible.

Pulling away he pushes a strand that loosened back behind her ear. Her eyes remain closed and she pushes her body upwards chasing his lips not wanting a single inch of space between them.

“Slow down baby,” he laughs. “Look at me.”

She was already dizzy on his love and the dominant tone in his demand makes her gasp softly sending an electric current down her body. Looking up at him with a mix of adoration and ready compliance in her eyes has him groaning and leaning down to kiss her again, only rougher and all consuming this time. Her arms wrap around his neck while his hands roam up and down her body. Their desperation for each other grows by the second and her need has her pulling him to the bedroom not separating for even an intake of breath.

If Billy wasn’t too distracted with wanting to rip every article of clothing off her he’d laugh at her attempts and urgency to drag his body all the way to bed. Of course he humors her and would never admit to letting himself be tugged along so easily. He only pauses to avoid crushing her when she pulls him onto the mattress. He takes this moment to let his eyes run over her, a blush fills her cheeks at this attention.

“I love you baby, you know that right?”

Her hand comes up to cup the side of his face and he turns to press a kiss to her palm.

“I love you too Billy.” A happy sigh spills out of her, “So damn much.”

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