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kindofcashton · 4 years

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𝕕𝕚𝕤𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕟𝕖𝕔𝕥𝕖𝕕 • chapter 17 (Calum Hood AU)

DESPITE THE STARTLING realization that I might in fact be in love with Calum, I didn’t act any differently. I didn’t hover or cling to him like annoying, love-struck girls would. In fact, I was almost more distant, using it as a safety precaution in case he caught on to my intensifying feelings. One night I casually suggested we sleep apart, even though the thought pained me. Calum’s reluctance was a comfort, but even still he ended up agreeing. That was one of the longest nights of my life; I laid for hours just staring at the ceiling, wondering if Calum felt as empty as I did without a warm body laying next to mine.

Things at the house were also just better all around. With Ashton and Hannah on good terms again, the group was tentatively back together. I interrogated Hannah for answers on what had happened, if their relationship was slowly reforming. She dodged most of my tougher questions, insisting that they’d put aside any bad blood for the sake of the group. I didn’t entirely buy this; something definitely happened, but for whatever reason Hannah wasn’t ready to tell me. I didn’t demand any more details, seeing as I was withholding plenty myself. Hannah thought Calum and I were just fooling around, no strings attached. While that was what was supposed to be going on, my feelings lately had confused things. By no means was I going to tell a soul what I felt, but even keeping it inside still made the whole thing feel different. I leaned deeper into Calum’s kisses, I held his gaze longer when he rocked inside of me. My body was communicating all on its own, and I just hoped Calum didn’t catch on to these subtle changes.

After a particularly hot and passionate night together, I was frantic to go off to work. Calum’s heady pants still echoed in my ears, the burn of his fingers still lingering on my skin. As I sat on the edge of the bed lacing up my sneakers, I felt warm lips press into my neck, and goosebumps raised immediately where he kissed me.

“Back for more?” I joked, not looking over my shoulder. I’d woken up before him to get ready, leaving him peacefully asleep, or so I thought. He swiveled his body to sit next to mine on the bed, shoulder bumping my own. Calum was clad only in black athletic shorts, his toned torso on teasing display.

His nose nestled into my neck, making my lashes flutter. “I can be quick,” he whispered in a sultry tone, and I pushed him away with a snort.

“I think I’ll need more time to recover after what you did last night,” I reminded him, feeling the residual ache between my legs. Calum left me the sore in the best way possible, and all day I would have a reminder of his body’s wicked tricks.

Calum smirked at me, flopping over onto the mattress with his hand over his abdomen. He looked beautifully relaxed, jawline framed by the morning light, his eyes drowsy but content. I’d never seen him so happy, and for a second I wondered if it was more than just the sex that made him feel this way.

“How long’s your shift?” he asked, eyes closing with a yawn. I grabbed my bag off the floor and shouldered it with a sigh.

“Long,” I said simply, not looking forward to the strenuous hours ahead. With community college tuition looming, I asked Mack for as many shifts as I could get, just in case I felt tight on money. I’d rather have more than enough than barely enough, even if it meant working excruciating hours.

Calum frowned. “You’re working so much lately.” There was an edge to his voice, like he disapproved.

I ran a hand through my hair in aggravation. “What else am I supposed to do? My life is getting back on track, and that means more bills to pay.” I tried to stifle the resentment bubbling up inside me; Calum lounged around day in and day out, doing what he wanted when he wanted to. Week after week he tore open the checks his mother sent, tossing them carelessly onto his desk. Usually this didn’t come between us, but with my increased schedule I couldn’t help but feel bitter about his lazy routine.

Clearly a similar thought crossed his mind, and his frown deepened. He didn’t say anything else, instead taking on a guarded expression. He was so hard to read sometimes, and when I wanted him to open up he just shut down. I had no idea how he felt about me going back to school; part of me thought he didn’t care, but another part wondered if he felt insecure that I was growing up and making a life for myself while he wasted time doing nothing important. I wished he would tell me if he felt this way, but of course he never did. We didn’t talk about anything that wasn’t surface level, which was fine when we were in our peaceful little bubble.

But I had to live in reality, which meant popping that bubble more frequently. I couldn’t let Calum distract me from my more important goals, and he just had to learn to deal with my busy lifestyle.

As I was tying my hair into a messy ponytail, Calum suddenly asked, “When do you get off?”

“Seven,” I answered. “It’s a ten-hour shift with only one lunch break. I might drop dead from exhaustion.” A second passed, and I chewed my lip as an idea popped into my head. “Want to get dinner after I’m finished?”

For some reason this caused Calum to lean up, his posture stiff and his expression incredulous. “What?”

My brows knit together, puzzled at his odd reaction. “Dinner. I’ll be starved after my shift, so I thought you could join me.”

His frown turned into a glare. “Like a date?” He sounded defensive and mocking, which didn’t help my already exacerbated mood.

“What, we can’t eat a meal together? Is that against some hook-up rule or something?” I couldn’t control the annoyance in my voice; why did Calum always have to complicate things?

“I don’t know, dinner just seems like a weird thing to do.” I had no idea what he meant by ‘weird’, and his unreadable expression didn’t help me figure it out.

“Whatever, Calum,” I refuted. “Forget I asked.” I was already late for work and had to catch the bus, so I didn’t bother staying to bicker any longer. Admittedly, it hurt that he was so against the idea of us spending time together outside of the bedroom. I’d suggested dinner as more of a friendship thing than anything else; after all, there was a time when the two of us actually liked one another.

I didn’t realize Calum had followed me until I reached the front door, but his arm blocked me from opening it. He’d thrown on a shirt and shoes, and his lips were pressed together in a thin line.

Fuming, I crossed my arms and demanded he move. “I’m late for work, Calum.”

“No, you’re late for the bus,” he countered. “So let me drive you, and that’ll solve the problem.” For such a considerate offer, he didn’t sound too nice about it. His scowl seemed permanently etched on as I followed him to his car.

We drove in silence for a few minutes, not even the sound of the radio to alleviate the tension. Calum’s knuckles were white as he gripped the wheel, and I leaned as far away from him as possible.

Sensing my irritation, he asked, “Are you gonna be pissed at me for the whole day?” He sounded accusing, which only made me more infuriated.

“No, Calum. I’m not gonna waste that much time on you.” Realizing how harsh the words sounded, I backtracked. “I just thought we could eat some stupid grilled cheese sandwiches together and maybe do something different for a change. God forbid I want to spend time with you.”

More silence, so I thought the conversation was over. But then I glanced over and saw an odd look on his face, almost resembling guilt.

“So it’s not a date?” he reiterated, and I let out an enormous sigh.

“I literally just want to eat food, and not do it alone,” I insisted, so beyond done with this conversation. But Calum seemed satisfied with my answer, and eased up his tight grip on the wheel.

“Okay, so I’ll pick you up.” He met my eyes as he pulled into a parking spot near the cafe, stopping the car and filling the air with quiet. I tried desperately to see the thoughts swirling behind his level brown gaze, but it was a hopeless task. At least he wasn’t hostile anymore. I sighed again, hoping my annoyance was well communicated so he knew not to pull this shit again.

“I’ll see you later,” I told him before closing the car door. I stalked towards the coffee shop, grabbing the strap of my bag for support as I refused to look back.

Roger knew something was up the minute I started working. I moved angrily as I made the coffees, sighing every so often and grimacing rather than smiling at the customers. It would be a long day.

“Who pissed in your morning coffee?” he joked after a particularly bad exchange with a customer. The guy had demanded I remake his cappuccino because it “didn’t taste right”, and when my polite apology wasn’t ass-kissing enough for him he accused me of being a miserable, lazy youth. I seriously contemplated throwing the hot coffee in his face, but reminded myself I was working these stupid shifts for a reason. My future.

“Just having a bad day, I guess,” I replied vaguely, but this didn’t satisfy Roger.

“Trouble in paradise, eh? What’s he done now?”

I couldn’t help but smile at how Roger always jumped to my defense, always blaming Calum when things went wrong. “I told him I was working late and suggested we get dinner, then he flipped out because he thought I meant it as a date.”

This intrigued Roger, who raised his eyebrows in pleasant surprise. “Interesting. He could be using reverse psychology. I’ll bet he actually does want to go on a date, but wants you to think that he doesn’t.” Roger tapped the side of his head. “Smart cookie.”

I laughed, beginning to wipe down the counters after the first morning rush. “I’m a psychology major and I still can’t figure out what goes in his mind,” I joked. “I just thought it would be nice to do something together. Other than what we always do.” At my insinuation, Roger giggled like a schoolboy.

“Ah, yes, the sex has reached the boring stage, has it?”

I shook my head firmly. “No, not at all. It’s still great, just...” I exhaled sharply, frustrated with the whole situation. “I really thought it was just gonna be dinner, but then he had to make it weird. And he was being weird about me working so much, too. I don’t know what his problem is lately.”

Roger nodded along to my rant, considering the dilemma. “Well, that’s obvious at least. He feels left behind.”

I waved the rag excitedly. “That’s what I thought! I mean, he doesn’t have any idea what he’s doing, and I have every idea. I thought maybe he was jealous or insecure, but he’d definitely rather die than tell me this.”

“He’s a guy like that. We don’t like feeling inferior, and when we do we totally deal with it the wrong way,” Roger informed me. “He doesn’t know how to process these complex emotions so he’s shutting them out.”

I smiled. “You don’t need to tell me twice. Classic defense mechanisms, disconnection from his feelings...” I trailed off, suddenly feeling guilty. I shouldn’t psychoanalyze Calum, not when I knew how much he hated that side of me. But I couldn’t help it when he was being so difficult.

Resting my elbows on the counter, my smile faded into a worried frown. “What do I do, Roger? I thought we were in a good place, but lately it just doesn’t feel right anymore.”

“Don’t give up yet,” Roger suggested. “Give it a little more time. But if Calum doesn’t start making some changes, cut him loose. You’ve got better things to deal with than his emotional immaturity.” Despite the harsh criticism, I knew Roger was right. Whatever I felt towards Calum didn’t matter if he was jeopardizing my future, and I couldn’t keep dealing with his detached feelings when it made me so exhausted.

For once I actually dreaded the end of my shift. I had no idea what mood Calum would be in when he picked me up--or if he would even pick me up at all. I wouldn’t put it past him to abandon me, especially if he wanted to avoid an uncomfortable conversation.

I ended up cleaning the whole dining area twice, and even resorted to re-mopping the floor which was practically sparkling already. Roger played along with this for as long as he could, but even his patience was wearing thin.

“We got off half an hour ago, Scarlett,” he criticized, snatching the mop out of my hand. “I’m going blind from all the sparkly-clean surfaces inside this cafe.”

I sighed, placing my hands on my hips. “I know, you’re right. I just...when I’m nervous I like to fix things and be productive, so cleaning--”

“Yeah, yeah, your fatal flaw is that you care too much and you clean all the time. I swear, you act like you’re the worst person alive when those are barely flaws.” Roger’s tone was light, but I couldn’t help but look deeper into his joke. Did Calum think that I didn’t believe I had any flaws? Caring too much is barely even a character flaw, but that’s what he threw in my face constantly. Maybe he thought I put myself on a pedestal above him, and that’s why he felt so insecure.

I decided I would try to be less condescending and more open when it came to Calum’s feelings. I only hoped he would actually appreciate this effort, and maybe start making some positive changes of his own.

The sun was bleeding into the sky as it set below the horizon, casting a pale orange glow about the earth. I glanced around outside the cafe, searching for that signature red mustang that always made my heart skip a beat.

Sure enough, it was parked right across the street, and Calum was leaning casually against it. He looked good; typical black jeans and sneakers with a big red flannel over a band shirt. My face broke into a surprise smile; I remembered wearing that shirt just a few nights ago.

When I approached, Calum’s brows raised disbelievingly. “What’s with the face?” he questioned, referring to my dumb grin.

I shrugged. “I don’t know, I guess I wasn’t exactly sure if you’d show up.” It was an honest answer, and I didn’t think lying or placating Calum would help either of us.

His lips twisted into a sardonic smirk. “Of course I showed up; I would never miss our date.” He said this with obvious bitter sarcasm, but the crinkles around his eyes softened the delivery. I rolled my eyes, amused by his stubborn refusal to get over the whole “date” thing.

“I’m starved, where should we go?” I’d eat just about anything right now, but a grilled cheese sounded particularly mouth-watering.

“Luke says there’s a new diner open by the music shop. Says it’s more upscale than the truck-stop places we always go to.”

I nodded, pleased with the idea of trying out a new place with Calum. This felt like something regular friends did, and although Calum and I were definitely out of the ordinary, I enjoyed it nonetheless.

The diner was fairly packed when we got there, but we managed to snag one of the last open booths. There was no question about what we’d order; as soon as the waitress showed up, we asked for two grilled cheeses.

I sipped my coke and gazed out the window at the bustling city streets. My muscles relaxed into the cushioned booth as the day’s stress lifted from my shoulders. Work was taxing, as always, but worth it in the end.

Neither of us minded the quiet, since we were so used to each other’s presence. A few times I felt Calum’s knee brush mine under the table, and my lips twitched at this subtle motion.

“Why’d you get out so late? Mack ask you to stay longer?” Calum twirled his unopened plastic straw between his fingers, and for a second the movement mesmerized me as I thought about his skilled fingers.

“No, I just wanted to clean the place up. I didn’t have to stay.”

Calum scoffed lightly, and I worried I said something wrong. “Always so selfless,” he muttered, but I couldn’t detect if he was joking or not. “Do you ever do anything wrong?”

The question was rhetorical, but I took the opportunity to open up a little and show Calum that I could be vulnerable. “Yeah, all the time. What do you think me lying to everyone was about?”

He frowned, unsatisfied by the answer. “You lied out of loyalty to a friend, that’s hardly wrong.”

“Okay, then I leech off all of you by living rent-free. I’m cheap, I’m a cheap-skate.” I was grasping at straws, anything to show that I didn’t think I was some perfect angel. And I didn’t. I knew I was flawed and I hated that Calum thought I wasn’t; that would just set him up to be disappointed when he realized I wasn’t as amazing as he thought.

Calum just rolled his eyes at this attempt. “You whine about feeling bad every day, that’s hardly being a leech.”

Sitting back with a defeated sigh, I demanded, “Well, what do you want me to say? I’m showing you everything I do wrong and you’re denying all of it.”

“Because you don’t do anything wrong. You’re so kind it makes my teeth hurt, and there’s never a doubt in anyone’s mind that you’re genuine. You’re perfect, Scarlett.” He said this matter-of-fact, like I was a little kid he was explaining something very simple to.

I ignored the way his final sentence made me feel. You’re perfect, Scarlett. Did he really see me that way? Was I perfect to him? Or perfect for him? I hoped it was the latter, and bit my lip to hide my inner turmoil. Calum danced along a very thin line all the time: the line between what we were now, and what I secretly wanted us to be. What kind of friend-with-benefits says you’re perfect? I tried to convince myself he didn’t mean it, that it was supposed to be mocking, but the sincerity in his eyes was telling me otherwise.

Thankfully, the waitress interrupted us with food and gave us both an excuse to change the subject. As soon as she left, Calum and I collectively cringed; the sandwiches were cut down the middle.

Calum exhaled gravely, shaking his head. “Gonna have to tell Luke this place isn’t so great after all. I mean, they really fucked up here.”

I laughed, pretending to push my plate away. “Get that waitress back here, we’ll set her straight.” As we both joked over the grilled cheese, any intensity or confusion from before was banished. The meal was quickly over, and I won the argument for which of us would pay for the food. While we got up to leave, Calum grumbled about having to take me out again so that he could pay and make us even.

When he said this, I had to hide my blushing smile.

The night wasn’t too cold, and we decided to walk for a little bit before driving home. Our hands swayed close to one another’s, and I willed Calum to twine his fingers with my own. But the backs of our palms grazed a few times, and he made no move to change this.

As we passed by a familiar building, I pointed it out to Calum. “That’s one of the places Hannah and I looked at. The apartment is actually pretty nice, but there’s god-awful green bathroom tile that makes me nauseous just looking at it.”

Calum smiled vaguely, his expression distant. “You can’t live there, the location is awful.”

I knitted my brows together. “It’s right by the coffee shop.”

He shook his head. “Yeah, but way too far from the house. We’re never gonna see you guys if you live there.”

I chuckled, looking down at the pavement as we walked. “I think you just don’t want me to move out,” I concluded.

Calum’s smile tightened. “Yeah, who else would constantly wear the shirts that are supposed to be mine?”

My shoulder nudged him jokingly as I teased, “Admit it, you love seeing me in your tee shirts.”

He paused in walking, and my grin faded. Had I been too serious? Was using the word love a mistake? Panic welled up in my chest, and I feared I ruined an otherwise perfect evening.

And then all of a sudden his phone began to ring, and I let out a breath I hadn’t even realized I’d been holding. Saved by the bell, I thought, wondering what would have happened if we weren’t interrupted.

Calum fished through his pocket for his phone, pulling it out and glancing at the screen. His expression immediately darkened, and my stomach sank upon seeing this.

“Who is it?” It was a stupid question, because I knew he wouldn’t answer. Calum squared his shoulders and started walking, leaving me to hurriedly catch up to him.

“No one,” he snapped when I reached him, anticipating my badgering questions. “Drop it, okay?”

I opened my mouth to protest, but then remembered the promise I’d made to myself earlier. Don’t be condescending. So I kept my mouth shut, and instead focused on keeping up with Calum’s long strides.

He glanced at me a few times, surprised I wasn’t trying to get answers out of him. Once I met his eyes, and saw the deep thought hiding behind his brown orbs. I wished he’d let me in on what he was thinking, but I settled with not knowing.

A minute passed, and then his phone chimed, indicating the caller had left a voicemail. We both tensed, but I didn’t expect him to listen to it.

So I was surprised when he whipped his phone out and brought it to his ear, stopping again to listen to the message. I stood a few feet from him, keeping enough distance that I couldn’t eavesdrop on the call, even though I was dying to know who it was.

I watched Calum’s face as he listened, taking in the subtle narrowing of his eyes, the lowering of his brow in shock. His lips parted, and all I wanted to do was kiss away the storm brewing behind his eyes.

The voicemail ended, and Calum shoved his phone back in his pocket. But this time when he tried to continue walking, I stopped him, stepping in front of his chest and placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Calum,” I started gently, lifting my eyes to his. He avoided my quizzical stare, breathing hard. “What is it? What’s wrong? You can tell me.”

He pushed a hand roughly through his hair, glaring everywhere but at me. “It’s nothing, Scarlett. Don’t worry about it.”

“I’m not,” I defended. “But maybe you should since whoever it is makes you feel this angry.”

Finally he turned his angry eyes on me, and I inhaled sharply at the fury I saw there. “Fine, it was my mother who called. Satisfied?” He pushed me aside in order to storm off, and I was too stunned to move for a moment.

But then I jogged to catch up, breathless and confused. “Your mother? What did she want? I thought she only reaches out through the checks.”

Calum looked ready to boil over. “She does, but apparently she felt the need to call me.” He appeared to be fighting over his next words, before finally stating, “She wants me to come home for a visit.”

I took a minute to let this information sink in. Instinctively I was thrilled; his mother reaching out was a promising sign that their fractured relationship could be healed. But then I considered the ramifications of her request. She wouldn’t just ask out of the blue if something else wasn’t going on. And she had to know that Calum wasn’t exactly warm and fuzzy when it came to family stuff, so why not go about it delicately, not so sudden and shocking?

I tried in vain to read Calum’s expression, finding nothing but frustration and anger. It pained me to see him so tense, but I didn’t just want to coddle him, I wanted to help him.

“Why not go?” I proposed softly, trying not to set him off. “It might be good to see her.”

Calum snickered at this, and I winced. “You’re shitting me, right?” He sounded harsh and mocking, and I struggled to hold my ground.

“I know you’re confused and hurting,” I said firmly. “But you don’t have to take it out on me. I just want to help you.”

“Of course you do, because I’m your favorite little charity case,” he retaliated. “Give it a rest, Scarlett. I don’t need you smothering me.”

Fuming, I folded my arms and didn’t shy away from his steely gaze. “No, Calum. You can be an asshole and you can bitch about whatever you want, but don’t you dare take it out on me. I’m just suggesting you patch up your relationship with your mother, or at least give it a try--”

“What makes you think you know what’s best for me?” he snarled. “You don’t know me, you have no right to tell me what to do. We’re not even friends, so why do you care?”

I huffed in disbelief, pressing a hand to my forehead. “Why do I care? Maybe because I’m not an emotionless husk who has no idea how to express his feelings! We’re sleeping together for God’s sake--”

“And that makes us what, a couple? You think you’re my girlfriend? We’re not even friends, Scarlett.”

Each word cut me like a knife, voicing the exact anxieties that had been eating away at me for weeks. “I know we’re not, which is why I wanted to go to dinner and spend some freaking time together!” I was embarrassed at how high my voice had gotten, how pathetic I sounded when I was trying to defend myself.

Calum chuckled darkly. “I don’t want to be friends with you. You always do this, you always force your way into other people’s problems because you think it involves you when it doesn’t.” His hard eyes met mine. “You’re nothing more than a good lay, and I can get that anywhere.”

I tried to remember how to breathe as I watched his figure get smaller and smaller, walking farther and farther away from me. Each step he took was a stab to my heart, until he was out of view and I was left bleeding alone in the street.

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2612-1802 · 4 years

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Busy(6) - Worst type of Busy

Busy & Busy(2) & Busy(3) & Busy(4) & Busy(5)

“Umm Oppa, this is really delicious!” Chaerin smiled as ChangMin sipped on his beer beside her in the snack tent.

“I knew you would like it! Here, there’s something on your cheeks.” ChangMin picked up a tissue and cleaned the red sauce off Chaerin’s face. A small moment of life, but forever in pics. “ZZZZZZZZZ” your phone has been vibrating for a long time. Thinking that it was the alarm, you just ignore it, trying to get more snooze before you are really getting late. “WHATTTT?” your voice dragged loudly as you picked up the phone. “Just 5 more mins please. I’m not lateeee”

“Listen up you dumb bimbo.” A familiar voice struck. “While you’re sleeping, your boyfriend is out with some other girl.” Your best friend shouted on the phone.

“What are you babbling about, Hyorin?” Your eyes suddenly widened at her remarks, you turned to look at the clock on table it’s 6am and turned again to look for him but he was not on the bed or anywhere else in the house.

“I’ve sent you pictures. Check your telegram. Ask him about it. And break up if you need to. Cheating man don’t deserve second chances.” Hyorin coolly ended the call and you looked through all the pictures she sent you.

“They been here since 4am. I’m a few tables across and he didn’t seem to notice me at all.” the text read after all those pictures. Pictures you wished were just photoshopped.

“Were they always this close?” You thought to yourself. “So this is what they do every time they meet?” Your eyes were glaring forcefully at the pictures, the one she held his arm, the one she put her face close to his, the one she feeds him, the one he cleans her face.

Just as you were cursing through the pictures, the front door unlocked, and you hear him walking in. You wanted to walk out and confront him. With the pictures in your phone. But all you did was just lay in bed, your back facing him, sleeping near the edge, picking a distance furthest from him.

There were many thoughts in your head, but you just couldn’t put them together. As your thoughts deepened, time passed and the alarm for school rang. You quickly left the bed and dressed up for school.

He was up early too, even after that late-night cheating, ChangMin was up at the same time as always, 7am just before you leave for school. You ignored his every move, pretending like he didn’t even exist. At least that’s what you decided to do before coming up with a plan of action. You didn’t want to be reckless. But you knew inside you, this relationship will come to an end soon. There’s just nothing left to work on. You left for school, quickly and quietly, and rushed for the bus. School was stress as usual but your thoughts keep drifting to those images. “And he told me he wasn’t hungry. But he still went out to eat with her?” you scorned at that conclusion. The conclusion that you just ain’t his priority anymore.

“So? You want to go for it?” Hyun pushed his face into your sight cutely.

“Go for what? Sorry I was having some thoughts.” You replied sheepishly, rubbing the back of your head.

“Do you want to go for a ride in my car later? My brother gave me his old car. But don’t worry it’s not that old. You don’t have to wind up the windows.” You let out a loud laugh at his last remark.

“Sure, it sounds like fun. Where are we going?” You were thinking of somewhere fresh, and free like a big grass patch or the lake. Just any place that will not remind you of ChangMin.

“How about we just drive aimlessly? Sound good? Just get some mileage in. We’ll get food too. So we can eat while we cruise!” excited as his own suggestion, Hyun jumped up from his seat, making you laugh even more. You agreed to his little idea and for once, was actually looking forward to ending school. For weeks now, you’ve been just alone at home after school, hoping to spend some time with your beau but he was hardly home.

Just as class was ending, your phone was vibrating like mad again. The texts just wouldn’t stop coming.

“Oh my god, he’s finally dating?”

“He has a girlfriend now?”

Similar texts were just popping on your notification bar and a repetitive online news article. “TVXQ! ChoiKang ChangMin finally dating again.”

Pictures were just what you saw in the early morning, just with better quality and different angles. Paparazzis indeed.

Your heart just sank though you already knew about this in the morning. Trying to control your tears, you switched off your phone to redirect your attention to your little outing with Hyun.

“Shall we?” Hyun giggled and the bell rang, indicating the end of class, and end of school to be exact. Grabbing onto his arm, you smiled and the two of you set out for drive-thrus and aimless cruisings on the road.

#changmin #changmin scenarios #changmin reactions #changmin imagines #dbsk scenarios #busy

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soft-sarcasm · 5 years

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JUNG HOSEOK: THIS CONVERSATION.

Pairing: jung hoseok x reader. Genre: a n g s t. that's it. Word count: 3,2k+ a/n: i keep going ages without posting and when i do post its never what i've promised but i swear the stuff i said before is going to arrive sometime in the next millenium. i don't know really where this came from or what it is but it followed out really naturally because for me i either sit down and write something to its completion, or start something, get like almost mid-way, stop and never come back it. so here it is, whatever it is. p.s i listened to these songs from the your name soundtrack while writing the end of this and almost bawled my eyes out so if you want to go full emo enjoy. also this conversations by ciaran levery is really good for this. @kaylee-jade-camp

The first 48 hours are crucial, in both a missing persons case and a 'might have been broken up with' case. Okay, perhaps the latter isn't quite as crucial as the former, but it certainly felt like you were missing something, perhaps your heart, as you stared blankly at the neatly digitalised words that had been haunting you for the past 20 hours since they had initially been received;

'This isn't working out.'

Now it may seem a bit dramatic to instantly jump to the conclusion that you were being broken up with, and you would agree if it hadn't been the conclusion to a near-hour long fight that had raged between message notifications and furiously tapping thumbs. Text messages and phone-calls had been the customary medium in which the majority of your relationship-centric arguments had taken place throughout the year that there had been a relationship to argue about. It had become so customary to expel all of your frustration and disagreement through sharply worded texts and the purposeful absence of any reassuring emojis that you sometimes wondered if there was any other way to communicate such feelings.

Thankfully such instances didn't occur too frequently but when they did it usually happened when one, or both, of you, were seriously sleep-deprived and stressed out. This meant that it was far easier for fingers to type on their own and for hurtful words to be sent off to the other without a coherent thought. Something similar had transpired during the early hours of this morning when a simple 'have a safe flight' message to Hoseok had turned into something so much more. How or even why you couldn't be sure but somehow a match had been struck and a flurry of unresolved issues had been ignited.

'I just want some space.'

'You're barely in the country. The only thing that's ever between us is space.'

'You don't understand how hard this is for me.'

'I would if you would just tell me.'

'That's what I'm doing now and you aren't listening.'

'Because all I'm hearing are excuses.'

Those were just a few of the highlighted exerts from your far too dragged out debate, the in-between lines being stuffed with sentiments of a similar miscommunication. And then the dreaded 'this isn't working out' had been sent that was quickly followed by a complete radio silence which you knew you could logically account to the 16-hour flight Hoseok had been in the process of boarding when your fight had broken out. Even then the illogical part of your brain had decided matter-of-factly that Hoseok was officially done with you, that if he wanted he could use some of the all but limitless money he earned to purchase some of the airlines overpriced wifi and contact you but was choosing not to.

You were over. Finished. Nothing else to say and yet you couldn't help but hold out some semblance of hope that when he finally touched down on to home soil that you would receive a relieving ding followed by some sort of explanation about how he was still willing to work things out.

And yet nothing. You knew sometimes there was a delay between the landing and being out of the airport but even then, cell-service was not limited to being clear of Incheon and again, if Hoseok wanted to, he could have contacted you.

But it was clear that he didn't want to.

You had attempted to function with the knowledge that the relationship you had devoted so much energy and devotion to was just over. You went to your job, typed out mindless translations only to be later berated by your superior for the multiple discrepancies in your work. You had then proceeded to leave work and had a lonely meal for one in the tiny Udon place on the corner of your street, wallowing over you overcooked noodles as the radio blared the symphony of your boyfriend (potentially ex-boyfriend's) group as if to mock you.

You now found yourself curled into the crevice of your couch, staring down at the fluorescent screen of your phone with your message app opened to your conversation with 'Hobi.' Your responding message had yet to be read but you knew there was no way that Hoseok had spent this much time without looking at his phone, eve the tech-addict as was the majority of your generation.

'What does that mean for us?'

The silence was pretty clear answer to your question, there was no us left to mean anything.

Introspection was not something you excelled at. In fact ignoring and suppressing emotional issues was far more your style, as was it Hoseok's. Hoseok for all his sunshine and smiley cover, one he maintained even when he had landed which you knew thanks to fansite photos that had been posted as soon as he walked out of the Arrival gates over three hours ago, was a complex Rubix cube of a human. It took ages to figure him out and twist out all of his colours to get six sides that you could actually understand. Over the year you'd like to think you had gotten pretty close to having six completely solid faces but it seemed that you had been mistaken and there was still plenty of squares for you to decipher; not that you would be given the opportunity now.

It felt surreal like you were somehow caught in some dreamscape where you didn't know whether or not to trust your surroundings which was why you didn't instantly react to the serious of melodic dings that signalled your doorbell had been rung. The robotic sound echoed throughout your otherwise quiet apartment and when the final ding rang out there was a silence before the entire melody was set off again.

"Coming," You muttered quietly, shuffling through your flat that you hadn't even realised had become all but entirely dark since you had reclined to wallowing in the final hours of sunlight and had yet to do anything since. So you proceeded to turn on the lights as you reluctantly pulled yourself up to the screen that would reveal who was summoning your presence.

Even with the pulled down bucket hat and mask tugged under his chin it was undeniably Hoseok and his appearance was so startling that it took you a moment to actually comprehend that he was real and not a figment of your imagination. Your heart ached after not seeing him for so long and your palms felt clammy as you pressed the green button labelled 'Unlock.'

It was difficult to breathe with the anticipation lodged in your throat as you watched the door be pushed open and Hoseok to follow in after it. He didn't look at you as he made quick work of slipping off his shoes and trading them for the pair of house slippers that over the course of his visits had become his. When there was no task left for him to distract himself with he finally turned to where you stood, legs near quaking as you waited for him to say something.

"Hi." Was all he uttered and you had to stifle a scoff.

Anger threatened the creep into your system, attempting to punch words out of your mouth like 'what the fuck is going on,' 'why did you never reply' or what you really wanted to say 'are we really over?'

But you swallowed such questions and opted instead for a strangled, "Hi." Followed by an equally strained half smile that made your facial muscles ache. He stood awkwardly in the entrance to your home and the sight reminded you so much of the first time he had been there, hands stuffed idly in his pockets to keep himself busy as he attempted to keep his balance due to the alcohol that had coursed in his system thanks to the numerous cocktails you had shared at dinner. The air had been much lighter then, so much so that when you realised he hadn't followed behind you, you had turned back, an instant fit of giggles summoned by the look of uncertainty on his rose hazed face.

"You know, you can come in," You had said through tinkles of laughter, smile so big and heart so warm with your increasing adoration for this man that it had almost hurt, "You can always come in, no matter what."

Maybe that was why the look of hesitation on his face now hurt so deeply, that things had changed so thoroughly in your relationship that that meaningless promise you had made all that time before in between laughter and happiness didn't even apply.

"You can come in," You repeated, somberness twisting the words that once possessed so much merriment. You didn't say anything else.

Hoseok merely nodded and took a tentative step forward, so much caution that you literally had to turn away and busy yourself by migrating towards the kitchen. Hoseok's dancing abilities kept his steps light as he trailed behind you but thanks to the silence you were still able to hear when his movements stopped just at the threshold. A further sense of unfamiliarity and alienation crept up your spine and you had to stabilise yourself against the counter before mindlessly reaching over to switch the kettle on.

"Tea?"

You heard a rustle which made you assume Hoseok nodded but he seemed to realise pretty quickly that you couldn't actually see the movement with your back to him, "Yes."

This had to be the fewest words that had ever been shared between the two of you. You were both natural chatterboxes and even during the moments of silence shared between you there was still the loud comfort of the other's presence. There was no comfort remaining now as you stood what felt like oceans apart on the opposite sides of your shoebox kitchen. It was almost ironic, how you had actually spent weeks near months apart separated by actual, physical oceans apart and yet you had somehow felt closer then you did now.

The distance only seemed to stretch alongside the quiet as you both waited for the water boil and the distraction of placing two leaf-filled filter bags into separate cups before drowning them in scalding liquid. After a moment of steeping, you finally turned to Hoseok, half-looking at him as you extended a mug in his direction. He reached to take it with a nearly silent thank you before you both moved towards the living room.

Living room seemed to be a bit of a grand title for the make-shift space that doubled as a place you watched tv and ate but it would have to do today as the setting for this 20-hour dreaded conversation.

"I don't know where to start," Hoseok started quietly after one too many moments of silence had ticked past, "It's so different being here, like this."

"You mean in person?" You attempted to joke but knew that your words landed more as a blow by the way Hoseok winced at this, "Yeah, I know what you mean."

His lithe fingers tapped up and down the ceramic cup in his hand while you simply fumbled with the handle of your own mug, "Where do you even begin?"

"I think with something similar to 'I don't think this is working out," Again your words seemed to injure Hoseok as he flinched, "That's where our last conversation dropped off isn't it?" He seemed unnerved to be confronted with the reality of the situation, of the reality of his previous actions or lack thereof. It was as if he had almost expected you to ignore it, as though it hadn't been how you had ended up here.

"Yeah about that-" He swallowed as if to rid himself of a lump in his throat, "- I wasn't really thinking clearly when I sent that- you know how it is sometimes with the late nights and the early morning, I didn't mean it-"

"-Are you sure Hoseok?" You cut in even though you knew that it wasn't most likely the most sensitive thing to do in this situation but you could barely stand this situation as it was and his rambling with just going to prolong the agony. It was better to cut to the chase, to snip the steel cords that had once kept you so solidly tied together but had now been tugged down into weak, meagre whisps of wires that were now so easily snapped. "Are you sure you didn't mean it?"

"Of course I didn't," He answered instantly, eyes meeting yours for what felt like the first time, "Sure, sometimes this is a bit difficult but I never wanted to end things."

"Are you sure?" You repeated like some sort of broken record and for a moment you questioned yourself, why were you actively talking Hoseok out of making up? Why were you so set on causing the thing mere minutes ago you had been so fearful of.

Maybe it was because there was a part of you, the more logical part of you that was usually pushed to the background in emotional situations that understood Hoseok's true feelings, that knew that he had meant what he said even if he had yet to fully realise that himself.

"What are you even saying right now?"

"I think," Your hands all but rattled against the handle of your mug as the shook, "I think that you did- do want to end things."

You could hear the bewilderment in his voice even though you couldn't look at him to confirm your suspicion, "What- I don't understand-"

"I think," You continued, a familiar pricking sensation occurring in your eyes, "I think it's best if we do end things here."

Hoseok choked, "Where is this even coming from?"

Where was this coming from? Hadn't you been denying the reality of this situation mere seconds, breaths before Hoseok had officially arrived? Hadn't you spent the last 20 hours clinging to some semblance that this wasn't where your relationship ended? That after months, years even of putting up with the distance, the stress, the strain that this was it.

But the thing was, before Hoseok arrived it had been easier to pretend that there was still a carved space for each other in your lives. The actual shock of Hoseok being at your place reminded you just how long it had been since you had actually physically spent more than a few hours together. There had been the time nearly two weeks back where you had met at the company building, prepared to eat lunch together when suddenly your time together was cut to a short twenty minutes when Hoseok was suddenly called away for some urgent work thing. It hadn't been an unusual occurrence, more often than not your dates, nights together were cut short. You couldn't even remember the last time you had had sex, maybe two months ago, between the American and European tours in which you had paid him a surprise visit in London which had again been abruptly interrupted when there had been an emergency back at work that couldn't be taken care of over Skype.

When you actually started to think about your relationship there was very little of it to even recall, or at least to recall from the past few months. Except for the everyday mandatory text, all connections and efforts had dwindled. Which was to be expected and had happened before in the past but usually one of you would catch onto the separation sooner and would reach out, pointing out the distance and an effort would then be made to work harder, to talk more. But nothing had been brought up for months. Instead your relationship had turned near monotonous, a dull repeat of 'how was your day,' 'good morning,' and 'goodnight' with no real substance or interest in between. You used to know the latest tour story or funny antic by one of the boys but as you sat there in the heavy silence you couldn't remember the last time Hoseok had shared anything but the barest, most mundane details of his day.

"We barely talk anymore Hoseok, which was made pretty clear by this morning, and even when we do it's not really about anything."

"That doesn't mean we have to break up," Hoseok argued, adamance clear in his tone as he took to his feet, leaving his tea abandoned on the coffee table, "We just -I just need to work harder, I know sometimes with my job it feels like I'm a million miles away but I swear I can work on it-"

"-Hoseok," You interrupted softly turning to face him now, your heart shaking at the look of utter frustration and sadness on his face as his eyes burned with unshed tears, "This isn't just your fault, it's both of yours. Sometimes it just isn't the right time- maybe right now it isn't the best time for us-"

"-There won't be any us if we end right now." He stated, "That's how this works, if we decide that right now isn't the right time there won't ever be a right time and then we'll move on, you'll move on, and then there won't be any time for us because we'll be nothing but strangers."

A watery smile tugged at your lips, "Everyone's a stranger before they come into your life, and some people are just meant to continue being strangers."

"But not us," His voice was becoming more and more desperate as he tried to reason with both you and himself, "We were never meant to be strangers, I'm your pers- you're my person."

Slowly Hoseok sunk to his knees on the floor, the tears finally pouring out as his body and resolve caved in and you slipped off the couch to join him. You placed your hand gently on his knee as he wiped furiously at his eyes, "And there's going to be another person after me Hoseok, and if they aren't right there'll be someone else until you find the right one at the right time and it'll just all make sense."

"How can you say that? How can you be so calm?" He sobbed as if not taking notice to the shatter in your voice and the tears that trailed down your cheeks in steady dripping streams.

"Because I know it's true," You spoke so softly you barely heard yourself, "And so do you, you know that there's someone else that's going to make you so fucking happy and you're going to think back to this moment and know."

"No, no, no," Hoseok began to chant in between sobs before flinging his arms around you so you could physically feel his tears, "There won't ever be anyone else, that's not how it works."

You clutched him back just as tightly, staring at the ceiling as you blinked back tears to ground yourself, "Yes it is Hobi, and I can't fucking wait until you meet someone who gives you the happiness you deserve."

He pulled back to look at you and you couldn't help but reach to brush some of the remaining tears from his face, "This isn't how it's supposed to end, over something so stupid."

"Sometimes we don't even realise that what we're feeling is just love rather than being in love."

"Why are you so fucking smart? What am I going to do without you stopping me from doing stupid stuff?"

It was a genuine tug of happiness that curved your lips upwards as you wiped a final tear from his check, "Find someone smarter."

#bts #bts scenarios #hoseok scenarios #jhope scenarios #jhope #jung hoseok #kpop scenarios #bts imagines #writing #kpop #fic rec

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hansoulo · 3 years

Note

Yep that’s me you’re probably wondering how I ended up in this situation, you know, been awake for two hours since 4am, sitting on my bed with my phone torch on, crying and looking around for a big spider that was on the ceiling when I went to bed and woke up to it on the wall near my head, freaking out cause I didn’t have the guts to kill it …

IS IT STILL THERE??

#BABE NO!!!#I recognize that spiders are important to nature but I draw the line when they're in a position to drop into my mouth #I remember in my old house there was a shit ton of them and one would not leave my shower for like 6 months #we struck up a tentative business relationship where it agreed not to go near me and I agreed not to spray it with the shower house #*hose #anon #lari speaks

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the-dreamer-traveller · 4 years

Text

The Mega-Revolution

There are two separate parts of this dream: Legosi Sequence and Defiance Sequence.

Legosi Sequence:

The dream part begins sometime after the canon timelines. After he has been branded as an outcast due to a leg eating incident with Louis, he had been shunned from the general public and is recorded in a crime very similar to that of a sex offender. However, this is portrayed as even worse. This time around, Legosi is moved away from his own home, school and life, left to wander alone within an unknown city that is decaying and rotting, leaving Haru and Louis and the people he loves behind.

Lost and lonely, Legosi walks into the rooftops of several tall buildings, with nothing but the same clothes that he wore in school. The buildings around him are modern, but the paint is slowly chipping off and there are some unfinished foundations and pillars left in the roofs of a few buildings. The slowly approaching dawn creates little comfort in the atmosphere and the near non-existent use of vehicles creates an air breathing and choking experience. Legosi surveys in his surroundings to see if there is something for him to sleep and eat, and found what appears to be a small camp by the distance, with a tent made of blue and orange tarpaulin to shape in a triangular way that its stereotypically created in media. A smoke trail, coming from a still burning barrel, is present and placed at the front of the tent. There are a few people in the tent, which would be a preferable company for lonely Legosi.

Taking his guts to follow through, he nervously approaches to the group. It is a small group of outcasts and they allow him to join. Legosi notices that there are only three people in the camp and they have peculiar appearances. One of them is a female sheep, in her school uniform and possibly from another school, who was involved with a scandal involving something about eating a predator, which gets her the same treatment with Legosi. Another associate outcast seems to be a bird, possibly a hawk, where he tries to eat a small mouse and is treated the same thing, but only in a minor degree as he tries only a “small part of the body”. The most horrifying one is a brown mink guy, with distinguishing features such as teeth laced with metallic braces that are exposed by his healed torn-out lips that forms a grimacing-looking fake smile and a missing left eye, which is covered by a black eye patch. He could barely speak, is constantly salivating to keep his teeth and tongue moist and is the quietest of the group.

“He’s dangerously untouchable.” The sheep girl said, nudging at Legosi. “Don’t know what happened, but they say he gone berserk in a fight that leaves his mouth like that. Best thing is to do is to keep watching on him.”

Though he may really look at the part, given his glaring eye and watery mouth like a rabid dog, he’s surprisingly calm, only sitting in a chair next to the flaming barrel. He did try to speak to Legosi, but he stops his attempt in doing so and just continues with feeling the warmth of the flames, since barely any words came from his mouth and what sound is emitted would be gibberish or barely audible to anyone else.

While he takes a chair and sits by the view of the city, Legosi’s train of thoughts suddenly pass through. He begins to reminiscence of his good days, back before the disaster with eating Louis’ leg happens. He sighs sadly and stares at the tall buildings by the distance of where he is, while watching as the sun slowly dips to the horizon and night would soon come. Although his future may be destroyed by the act, he is dreaming of things to come and that one day would change the way society works, as well as getting the help he needs before he sets foot back to his hometown.

“Lehgoshi…?” The mink guy said, approaching him and tilting his head, curious of Legosi’s ideas. The wolf notices the mink’s approach and quietly continues looking by the distance. It feels weird to hear him speak, as his missing lips makes certain letters and vowels hard to pronounce.

Legosi only gave a short nod before he is thinking of revealing his thoughts to the group. Perhaps, now is not the time and would probably not the appropriate one for the date.

The Post-Legosi Sequence:

“Come on, Louis!” A female wolf, grabbing the hand of a deer’s, quickly said as they ascend in a set of black metallic stairs. Louis’ feet could barely keep up with the pace, as Juno is far faster and in a better shape that he is. “You’ll see it! You’ll see it!”

Oh, it may be great to be in a relationship with her but damn, was she a fit.

The city is dark while bright green lights shine by the distance. The city is advanced beyond their comprehension, featuring dark metallic buildings durable enough to stand against the rain and rust, bright futuristic lights and a mix and match of old buildings styles and new, creating an environment best suited and described as a cyberpunk mega-city. It would be a few more steps and Louis can finally rest while he could see what Juno wants him to see.

Eventually, both of them arrive at the rooftop, where they begin to see the whole cityscape. Louis’ breath is taken away, as he sees the sights. Around them are the same mixed old and new buildings, but they also contain bright lights. The light pollution in the city is so bright, it would be near impossible to sleep outside and the streets would still be visible. What is most impressive for Louis is that in the middle of the sprawling metropolis is a group of futuristic tall buildings, shining very bright light a gem in a great display. The skyscrapers are mainly light blue and there are various futuristic installments in it such as long curved paths wrapping around various parts of the buildings. It is so bright, that it looks like those areas would be the de facto capital of the whole metropolis.

The view is so beautiful, Juno and Louis are left standing speechless in its beauty.

“Did you know that Legosi did all of this?” Juno said, looking at Louis. “He sure did change the world when he becomes a politician. I wonder how he could do all of those things and what kind of people he is involved with.”

Louis silently nods and agrees.

That damn wolf.

Defiance Sequence:

(Alternating between 3rd POV and someone else’s POV):

In the rooftop of a large building complex in the dark city of Midgar, a lone figure patrols in the area, carrying his long-range rifle. Silently miserable of his position but remains vigilante to his duties, the Shinra guard walks in these roof tops, looking at the left and right to subdue intruders that appear in the way. While he is tired of the business and the toxic work environment, he’s his best to try earning his family the good name up until the end of his service.

Until he sees me tapping by a button in a small console at the top of a platform elevator and slowly begin going down. In quick response, he quickly pushes another button in a console next to him, which causes the platform of where I am standing to rise up, denying me to go down.

Shocked and surprised to see that I cannot go further, I turn to my left and saw the Shinra soldier standing far from me, his hand in the console. Angry and pouting, I quickly walk up towards him, with my shoes stomping on the metallic floor, while he slightly backs a bit, surprised to see the ‘intruder’ coming towards him demandingly like an angry Karen for a manager.

“Hey, dude. What was that for?” I called out, angrily while I pull out my accusing finger several times at him, with each step causing him to take another step backwards. “Can’t you see I’m trying to explore in this place?”

“Explore?” The Shinra Guard parroted a word from my mouth. “Look, kid. You shouldn’t be in these areas. You could get hurt!”

“Well, I know how to do so… so don’t try to bug me!” I replied, annoyed.

Frustrated, the Shinra guard quickly went to me and forcefully grabs my right arm, annoyed of my stuck-up attitude. “Listen, kid. I don’t like that attitude you put up in here. You’ll either respect with the authority or I will force you to go home by myself.”

I puff out in protest and quickly let him go my arm. “We’ll see about that, buddy!”

------------------------------------------------

We sat by a ledge of the roof top, just next to the elevator.

We have learned many things from each other’s conversation. Although I am hesitated to reveal him of where I came from or my other sensitive and private life facts, I did open up on somethings for myself, such as my adventures and travels (not my other, more dangerous and wild ones, though) and a few of my favorites and preferences. The Shinra Guard, once a bit aloof, cold and distant, slowly exposes more of his conflicted and calm side, telling me of his struggles in his job, the toxicity of working with Shinra, his family (adopted son to a Chinese-like family and having a brother name Sam Chu who also works for Shinra), his morality and his name (Harrisson).

“Come to think of it, I was thinking of wanting to retire somewhere safe and warm for my family.” Harrisson told me, slightly frowning behind his helmet. “I know that it is crap, but it is the least I could do for them.”

“I see.” I said, thoughtful. “I never thought that life in Shinra would be hard, especially if you are a regular soldier and not like those SOLDIERs.”

“I know, right.” He said. “But still, I am getting more conscious on my involvement with them, and I was thinking of running away.”

“Since when do you think of deserting Shinra?”

“Months? Years? I dunno. Just came into my mind.”

We became a bit silent after that, for only a few seconds. For me, I became conscious too as well, since I have run into some of the Shinra grunts in some point before. It made me wonder if those that I struck with lightning are only working for their families and friends, when I pierce one with a sharp icicle only to give a proposal or gift towards the people they love after hours or when I burnt couple of soldiers to crisps with them working for their kids and their future. My stomach tightens as I remember on my human and other sentient being kills, thinking of what would happen to the people in their life. The burden is heavy enough that, even if hesitating would result to myself or my allies greater harm, it wouldn’t help me getting my consciousness to kick in.

Trying to shake it off, I quickly stood up, which catches Harrisson by surprise and looks at me. “Hey. Do you want to come with me?” I asked at him, looking at his partially obscured face.

Harrisson is thoughtful and pauses for a second before he replies. “Where would you take me?”

“Somewhere safe for us.” I replied, extending my hand to him. “I was thinking if one day, you could follow me back to where I came from.”

“You sure about that, Ira?”

I nod. “We will take care of you and your family, we promise.”

Harrisson gives a soft laugh before his right leather gloved hand comes in contact with mine, holding a grip with a slight shake. “You’re a smart kid.” He complimented and I smiled back, helping to stand back to his feet. If not with his own help, his built and muscular body would make it difficult for me to help him stand up. I gave him a pat in his back while we walk into a different direction, as there is going to be a mission where both of us (I am in a different faction at the time) would meet and would cover our own backs.

Such as nice guy. Wished he had better friends.

------------------------------------------------

While Ira quietly follows Harrisson, a menu screen is open for the 3rd POV’s view, which features a digital and futuristic-like screen. It shows two tabs for the two respective characters, Ira and Harrisson. You move your mouse into Harrisson’s tab to check his details. Being a long-range user but also uses a nightstick for melee combat, you begin to think of him as an ideal character for multi-dynamic battle. He is also one of the characters that can change his outfit, from his standard Shinra soldier uniform to a custom-made black, silver, white and dark burgundy jacket, pants and boots, while keeping his Shinra helmet. A character with changeable outfits is a sure sign that they are a permanent character.

This is making things exciting for you to continue forward, as it would mean that he is for you to keep.

However, you settled him to keep his Shinra uniform instead.

------------------------------------------------

With my team, we all landed in a middle of a warzone. Setting place within a town full of dark brown buildings, beautiful market stalls and Mediterranean-style plazas and houses, it has been converted into a battlefield because of the presence of powerful monsters and beasts that invade the town, slowly destroying it of its beauty. My team, “Las Mágicas”, is deployed here along with Shinra Public Security Division to assist them in dealing with the battle against the monsters, which are numerous and powerful. Unlike the previous times when they appear as allies, the SPSD are very competent in here, even when several of the monsters are powerful magic using foes.

We are put somewhere in the back alley of the city, where a small battalion of the Las Mágicas units are dropped in. With Frost, an ice nymph from a frosty and unknown land, we land at the top of some stalls, overlooking at a ruined series of market stalls.

“So, I heard that you made a friend with someone from Shinra. Isn’t it, Ira?” Frost asked, looking at me with her piercing blue eyes.

I nod in response before I speak. “Certainly. He’s also a good man… and a nice body.” I said the last words dreamily, as if I am thinking of the other things.

Frost scuffs in annoyance. “Damn, always trying to look for someone to eat the candy, isn’t it?” She looked at me, annoyed, before she continues on. “So, when is this Harrisson guy coming to meet us?”

“He should be here in a moment–“

The sound of gunshots stops our conversation, and made us quickly stand in our defensive positions. Peering back at Frost and with a quick nod, we jump out of the stalls and quickly ran into a busted corner of the city street, where we saw a Shinra grunt leaning at the wall while he is surrounded by several Bomb-like geometric-shaped creatures, ready to attack him. I am shocked that I quickly ran into him.

“Harrisson!” I cried out, reaching out to him and held him in place before he falls into the ground from exhaustion due to his injuries. I catch his body, and damn was it heavy due to my small stature. Frost quickly came to my help and assists in taking out the rest of the Bomb-like creatures with her fast movements and flinging sharp ice magic projectiles to the enemies.

As the Bombs are distracted to slowly being killed off, I carefully set Harrisson’s unconscious body to the ground. Injured but still alive, I quickly notice that his breathing is shaky yet stable. I quickly work with my healing magic spells to heal him. Manipulating white magical aura into thin magical threads by the fingers, I motion my hands around to conjure a healing spell that can speed up the natural healing rate of mortals, and I unleash it towards Harrisson, resorting his vitality. By the time that it is done, the Bomb-like creatures are already dead, and Frost is tired from her gymnastic moves and dodges.

“Took you a while.” I told him, sigh in relief.

Harrisson breaths rapidly as he regains his consciousness. He realizes that he is lying in the background and quickly stands up, with my help once again by taking his hand and helping him getting back to his feet. “Thanks again.” He said, slightly smiling in relief. “Can’t think if I could make it back there.”

“Don’t exert too much, Harrisson. You got me worried.” I express it to him, almost as if giving him a huge before I mentally restrain myself to do so. It feels so awkward to huge someone that I just meet in only a few hours, but him nearly dying causes me to get worried over him.

Frost moves in forward, noticing on the interesting conversation. “So, this is the guy you are talking about, right Ira?” She asked, putting her left hand on her hip.

“Yes. This is Frost, by the way, Harrisson.” I presented her to the Shinra Grunt, who takes a short bow. Frost gives a quick smile before she looks at me. “So, where should we head for the moment, as the monsters are still around the town.”

“Well, we should try go to what used to be a park then. Heard there is a large swarm of these things back there and that would probably be the last of them.” Frost suggested and quickly motion us to move forward, as time is running faster. Harrisson quickly follows by with running on his feet while I prefer flying as a much faster means of locomotion but also slowing it down to catch up with the group.

“You mean that the invasion is almost about to be repelled?” I ponder loudly for them to hear, moving away from a tall house to the side.

“Most likely.” Harrisson said as he jumps over a turnover barrel to catch us forward. “Once the whole operation is done, we are supposed to be meeting with our whole unit by an open field in the town, near to a hospital.”

We manage to reach with the park, again also destroyed by the monsters and transformed into a battlefield. There are only a few round bouncing monsters that cast fire, so it wouldn’t be much hard and of a challenge. Especially if not for an ice nymph with her powerful icicles, an otherworldly magician and a surprisingly competent Shinra soldier whose use of his gun is remarkable and his use of his nightstick for battle with finesse.

The creatures, the Hedgepies, begin to attack. Though that they are aggressive, they are dumb and we are able to hold off on our own. Harrisson kicks on it the face and fires a spreading shot into the face, throwing a chunk off from it, and slams another of the Hedgepies into the face with his nightstick. Frost floats away from the main attacks and flings sharp icicles into their foes. I enjoy toying with my foes, using my spells to disorient them before I finish them off with a fire spell or an ice spell.

In the end, we managed to destroy the rest of the Hedgepies and the invasion has ended.

However, Harrisson is injured again, this time he fell into one knee. Frost notice this and quickly ran to his side. “Hey, Ira. Can you go check at the main point to see if they are already there?”

“Huh, why would I do that? Don’t you want to come with me together up to the extraction point?” I asked, worried.

“Trust me, I’ll follow by.” Harrisson said, trying to find a potion to heal himself back to normal. Seeing that there may be no choice but to check at the extraction point of the SPSD, I quickly went up to my feet and fly away.

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I have managed to arrive at the extraction point of the Shinra Public Security Division, which is located at a park near to a hospital.

Boy, am I going to be underestimated if this is where all of the Shinra soldiers would gather after the mission.

The whole place is packed with soldiers, in rows and platoons. Some of the civilians are seen walking by the sidewalks, being relieved that the battle had ended. The gate is currently being managed by two Shinra soldiers, who are wearing red and appear to be one of the elite troopers. Being nervous to go near to them, especially since I may look like a civilian and not one of the Las Mágicas, I choose not to go near to the soldiers and opt for eavesdropping instead.

“Hey, ever wonder where is Harrisson Chu?” One of the gate Shinra troops said to his fellow trooper, curious of the man. I would guess that he must be a famous individual amongst the SPDS.

“Shouldn’t he be like showing up even earlier?” The other gate Shinra troop also said, pondering.

I quietly hum to myself. I’m surprised that Harrisson had manage to earn a sizable reputation in the SPDS, possibly due to his skill and/or personality or family background. It made me wonder what would the Chu family will be all about but it wouldn’t get me even more worried when the head commander of the sent forces begin his announcement.

“Attention, soldiers. Where is Harrisson Chu?” The head commander announced, wondering where the soldier is. “I repeat, where is Harrisson Chu?”

“If he doesn’t return here within fifty minutes, he is officially classified as deserted and you are free to execute him for deserting the army.”

My blood quickly went pale as I hear the words.

I never meant for this to happen.

But Harrisson is delayed and he didn’t arrive here in time.

He promised that he is going to follow me.

…

…What if my idea of running away from Shinra is really put in his heart and use this as a chance to run away?

… I fucked up big time.

I don’t want him to suffer and must run back to him. I don’t want him to get in serious trouble, now that he has a time limit of fifty minutes before he is classified as a deserter and a killable target.

I’m so sorry, Harrisson.

I fuck things up.

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Damn, he’s not in the park.

I had no idea what happened with Frost, but probably she left and went back to the Las Mágicas, seeing that things are already done in here.

But Harrisson is nowhere to be found.

With each step that I take, my tears slowly started to swell up. It’s all my fault that I am potentially putting him in a tight situation, to follow his authorities or rebel and possibly getting killed in the process. I find it that it’s my fault to present that idea and toy with his insecure mental state.

I try my best to hold back my tears. I have no idea how long time had been passed on, but probably only minutes. From running to walking, I walk around and around, hoping to find something for my peace of mind. I reach to a small residential area, which is covered with trees and only having a few trees. There are some 2-story houses with a small pavilion somewhere in the street, offering a good and quiet view and resting spot.

While I mindlessly walk in the pavement, I turn to look at one of the houses and my breath quickly left as I am shocked to see what it is.

There are two figures sitting at a metallic bench. One of them, to my surprise and relief, is Harrisson. The other is a Shinra soldier as well but wearing a military uniform more in real-life and he keeps his SPSD helmet. He’s also bandaged, with his right arm tied and hang by the bandages, as if he is trying to heel a fractured or damaged arm. This soldier is also sounding angry in their conversation.

“Brother, what the fuck are you doing?” He said angrily, looking at Harrisson.

Oh, I think this is his brother Sam Chu, the hot-blooded brother that Harrisson describes in the past.

Sam’s dialogues are peppered with some Chinese-sounding words along with some English-words, and they all tell him about the risky behavior that Harrisson is trying to do, running away from Shinra and, indirectly, their family. Harrisson doesn’t seem to mind about it and seems to be ignoring Sam’s angry and concerned ranting. Harrisson stood up first and walk away, which pisses Sam off and made him follow his adopted brother next.

“What do you think will our family feel, huh?” Sam said, angrily. “What do you think will mother will feel about you deserting the army?”

While both of them continue walking on, I slowly approach Harrisson, with slow steps due to how nervous I am as well as fear of his reaction due to Sam trying to get in his ears. Both of them stop in their tracks and look at me, with Sam seemingly surprised.

“Chu, who is this person?” Sam asked to his brother, curious. Harrisson couldn’t answer as we continue to stare at each other.

I broke down crying.

I quickly ran into Harrisson and hug him. I cry warm tears of guilt and sorrow as I bury my face in his chest. This is all my fault, trying to secretly pursue him to ran away without thinking of the long-term consequences. Sam is speechless, possibly not to ruin the moment. Harrisson frowns and put his hand on my head.

“Hey, it’s alright.” Harrisson reassured calmly. “It’s my fault that I did this, I shouldn’t be dragging you into this.”

I wish I could speak to him properly, but all the sounds from my mouth are wordless babbling, as I am still crying. Harrisson gave a soft smile before he continues to speak.

“Look, something dropped by the park. Mind if you could go and get it?”

I soon stop my tears and rub them away. My face is still red from crying, but I am trying to calm down and gave a short nod. I tried to make a smile, but couldn’t as I am still remorseful and tearful, while he gave a short pat in my shoulder. I understood on the task and gave him a short wave before I run back to the park, while Sam and Harrisson went back to the extraction point.

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As Ira runs off, you open the menu again.

Both Ira and Harrisson are still present but are not visible. However, you also noticed that you gain two more party members; Harrisson’s brother Sam Chu and another Shinra Grunt.

You look into Sam Chu’s stats and equipment. He’s a bo staff user, an unusual class and weapon when their division uses only guns and nightsticks. Similar with Harrisson, he’s also a customizable unit, making him a permanent party member, but his default involves him with no helmet, revealing his dark brown sharp hair and sharp brown eyes. Armed with a mischievous grin and his standard Shinra gear without the helmet, which is that of the elite Shinra soldier gear, he is not different from his own adopted brother as he also wanted to express his own freedom on how he dresses and what weapon he wants to keep. This might be a foreshadowing that Sam might too be secretly rebelling with Shinra but has strong loyalty with the Chu family, not wanting to dishonor them.

You try to look at the other party member, another Shinra soldier. However, the scene ends before you could see anything about him.

But you know that he is a team medic, and far more mysterious.

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In the streets of a downtown, it is bustling with market stalls selling smoking food products and stuff. The air is thick with smoke coming from the stalls, while streetlights hang from above. Civilians walk around here, to buy stuff from the stalls or to hang around and eat and be merry. Two figures, instead, are walking here and moved to a partially obscure wall of a building that is someone else’s apartment.

Harrisson leans in the wall, crossing his arms. Instead of wearing his Shinra uniform, he wears the same jacket design that he had in the menu that you see. Still keeping with his helmet, he looks down and not with the street level, as if patiently waiting for someone to come. Later, the other figure, Sam, went to him, wearing the same outfit that he had in the previous scene, but also keeping his Shinra helmet.

Sam, with a mischievous smile, gave a signal nod to his brother. Harrisson took a short breath before he stood up and both brothers continue walking down the market.

#dream #dream journal #dream plot #beastars #rebellion #magic

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