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#what a dumbass
vroomvroomwee · 4 months
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The face of someone experiencing sexual attraction for the first time
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The rumors are true: Peter B. Parker has TWO hands
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tanked-up · 3 months
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(Soap coming out of Price’s office)
Ghost: Woah, what happened?
Soap: Punched a recruit…
Ghost: Why?
Soap: He tried to yank my Mohawk off
Ghost: Uh… it’s your fucking hair-
Soap: Exactly! What a dumbass
Ghost: I knew a dumbass once
Soap: Ye’ gonna have to let go of that, LT
Ghost: IT WAS A NEW MASK, JOHNNY
Soap: I SAID I WAS SORRY
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awinchestershell · 1 year
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Stuntman: ow! Yeah that shit hurts!
Mark: MY TURN
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cocogum · 5 months
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Killua: “I don’t want to be affiliated with my family anymore.”
Also Killua: keeps his last name ‘zoldyck’ and doesn’t change it or keep it blank, keeps calling Illumi ‘big brother’, specifically relied on Milluki to make him a pair of yo-yo weapons, keeps calling his family with honorifics, respects his father and believes he made the right choice letting him go, makes promises with his father, always mentions he’s a Zoldyck whenever he introduces himself to others, has threatened Illumi that he won’t consider him as his big brother if he hurts Alluka when he should’ve already not considered him a brother from all the torture training he went through or even when he realized he got manipulated by one of his needles, obeys his father’s rules when it comes to being escorted by butlers, talks like he’s gonna get a time out from his family if he breaks a rule, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.
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ara-line · 2 months
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Welp. I found one antisemist.
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I like that he was kind enough to at least say Jews and actually own up to his antisemitism. Unlike some people.
Edit: Another One:
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hufflepotato-18 · 11 months
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SO HE’S BEEN USING SECOND CHANCE AND HE STILL HASN’T MANAGED TO DEFEAT THEM??
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roguelov · 8 months
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morpheus asks if you've ever slept with anyone else and you sigh dreamily as you remember this one person she was a powerful queen of Africa you say you wish you'd kept in touch she disappeared one day you didn't know what happened to her
for the first time you witness an anthropomorphic personification of something start sweating
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FUCK YES OH MY GOD THIS IS SO DELICIOUS AND SO FUNNY! Like you just sighing as you recount your time with her, while Dream physically cannot sit still
“And her name was?” Dream pressed. It couldn’t be, right? Not -
“Nada,” you smiled softly, recounting your memories.
Dream nodded. “… Nada … well I hope one day you may find out what happened to her.”
“Yeah, me too. I hope she’s at least okay wherever she is.”
“Right, well, I like to think she is in a warm place.”
Warm? Did he truly just say that? He wanted to rip out his own tongue.
“Warm is nice,” you hummed. “Some place warm and cozy.”
“Yes, so do I.” Dream rose. “Well, I must be off I have business to deal with.”
“Of course,” you smiled sweetly. “Have fun.”
Dream said nothing as he rushed out of there. Dear god, he was going to be in so much trouble.
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I'll make someone send you a wildly condescending ask insulting your joke poll about tungle dot fuck celebrities
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whiskyarts · 8 months
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Rewatching tts and remembering how much of a little freak Varian is. Quirin was probably so concerned about Varian making shrines to a criminal in his basement and being accident-prone while creating explosions. I need him to maintain that energy in vat7k because he’s such a little dork I love him -that one anon
I like to think while he's still accident prone, the fear and anxiety about what he caused to happen (the uh, amber. His dad.) causes him to be SIGNIFICANTLY more careful in the future. Not because he actually gets better at being careful, just because he's sickeningly terrified of messing up like that again.
He moves slower as to not knock stuff over, he watches his feet when he walks so he doesn't trip, he pre-measures chemicals with droppers and beakers so he doesn't accidentally spill something dangerous onto/into something he's not as experienced with because what if it happens again?
What if he kills the people he cares about? All because he was just a little too careless? What if no one forgives him?
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fandom-cove · 10 days
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you could even put the Sphinx in Ronodin's place
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wildelydawn · 1 month
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The Woman thought she could dehydrate fresh cherries in two hours, and it's been two hours and they're nowhere close to being done, and I just. I love this bitch so much, I really do. There's just something about her. Unexplainable. She's perfect.
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ice-cream-nekogirl · 2 years
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BNHA 366 Out of Context
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theslowesthnery · 2 years
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i watched my sister play Stray and we came across the derpiest zurk
it was in an area where you're attacked by a bunch of them in several waves, but after the waves were done this guy still remained. it didn't chase the cat, just sat still, and only started to jump in place once the cat was in attacking range. it also did the "creepy watson" thing where it followed us without actually moving, but still never actually attacked
it's like it just forgot how to actually move in any direction. my sister just let it be and it followed her until coming across some sewage it couldn't cross
(sorry for the dog whining in the background, omppu the lapphund was upset that she wasn't being given all of the blueberry pie)
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holylulusworld · 1 year
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TW: Anon hate
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Dear pathetic anon in my inbox,
thank you for the laughter.😂😂😂 I really needed that.
I don’t know why you're having a problem with protected sex in fanfic (seriously??) ... but okay... 🤐 Being dumb is not a crime, I guess ... harassing people on the other hand is a crime...
Try and touch some grass yourself.
I never got cheated on in my life. It’s called imagination. My blog also mentions AB/O and I'm not an omega... And you should decide whether you believe I'm an old virgin or if my husband has cheated on me and my stinky pussy (she smells great by the way). You can’t have it all.🙃
An advice for the next time you want to send someone hate to criticize their writing and insult them:
The first thing you need to do is learn how to write a proper sentence.
Don’t send them word vomit. It is essential to use punctuation marks as well as capital and small initial letters.
If you hate my stories so much, simply stay off my blog and read something else.
It's not that hard acting like a decent person on the internet.
All you have to do is scroll past something you don't like.
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lets-play-gwent · 1 year
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[Image description: destiel meme template of Castiel declaring his love to Dean
Castiel: I love you
Dean: elon musk is stepping down as twitter's CEO
end image description]
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