#what if i messaged a celebrity to ask them to prove they were real
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never grow up part eight
summary: after their break up, a drunken text from chris sends their friendship spiraling yet again
part 7 part nine
Chris’ POV
I got invited to a party tonight. It’s some celebration for a certain YouTuber I’ve never met before, but a party is a party when it comes to LA. It never really matters who they are, but getting invited is enough.
I dressed in a black hoodie, dark pants, and a white beanie pulled over my head, concealing the long hair I have yet to cut.
I haven’t talked to Sunny since the break up. It’s weird to even call it that considering our entire relationship was long distance. I don’t even know if I can count it as a real relationship, but I know she would, so I don’t want to be the asshole who doesn’t see things the same way.
The worst part about all of this is the fact that there’s no one I want more than her. It’s always been that way, and it’s never going to change. It’s always been her, and the fact that we’re on opposite sides of the country makes this all so unfair.
The love we have for each other has always been so strong, and I thought we could handle anything. I thought distance wouldn’t be so bad. We would work hard, and our determination would show how much we love each other. We would have to fight for it and prove to the other person that we wanted it, and I know we both did.
So why did it have to go this way?
I want to reach out and ask her how she is. I started to, but she left me on read. Petty little actions from her side of things that made me think I would never be able to get through to her.
I know she’s upset, and I can’t blame her, but my intentions were there. I knew it would only get harder, and I needed to end it before it would have made the breakup worse. I love her so much, she knows that. It’s like she’s trying to convince herself otherwise so she doesn’t come back to me.
Above all, I just want my best friend back.
We used to be able to talk about everything. Hell, I knew what fucking tampons she used because she would send me out to get them when we were in high school and she couldn’t leave the fetal position in her bed from her cramps hurting her so badly.
I knew what time of the year was her least favorite and how to cheer her up so she didn’t struggle for months. I knew how she liked her food so I could make sure the order was perfect for her when we would go through a drive-thru.
This was all so unfair, but I need her to work with me, and she refuses.
I followed my brothers to the Uber and sat silently in the backseat behind the driver with my phone tucked in my pocket. I felt like an idiot for checking the notification every time it vibrated. I hoped it would be her, but it never was.
Like an absolute idiot, I text her again, surely making a fool of myself.
Me: Can you let me know you’re okay?
I tuck my phone back into my pocket and pull it back out when I feel it vibrate again.
Progress has been made, because she read it, and reacted to the message.
I have to remind myself that it’s something when I see the thumbs up tacked to the top of my message to her. While it’s not much, it’s something and I have to be grateful for that.
I met up with some of my friends at the party, all of whom were waiting for me to arrive with shot glasses in their hands. I don’t bother asking what the drink of choice is before I throw it back, letting it burn my throat and make me choke on a cough.
Without getting a chance to ask for a drink, a different cup is shoved in my hand. I take a sip and purse my lips in disgust at the shitty beer they bought for this party. Once again, I remind myself to be grateful, because at least something is going to be getting me drunk tonight.
It doesn’t take much to get me drunk tonight. I woke up late as usual and hadn’t eaten until we arrived here, and the only food I’ve put in my body are small snack plates that are arranged on a large table. Crackers, cheese, and pieces of pepperoni. Basically a fucking lunchable pack scattered across a charcuterie board.
The same girl keeps bringing me drinks. She wants to get me drunk, and I know why. She knows what she’s doing, and even though I do too, I don’t bother telling her to go away. I’m known for being a piece of shit at the last minute when I could’ve prevented all of this. That became obvious with me and Sunny, right?
She has dark makeup covering her eyes, and the lighting only makes it harder to see her face. Not to mention I’m tipsy and my vision is starting to go out. She reaches for my hand, the one not holding an almost empty beer, and she places it on her shoulder. I play with the strap of her tight dress while she pulls herself closer to me. She wraps her arms around my own, holding herself at my side, making me wonder if I’ve said anything to invite this arrangement that I’ve already forgotten about.
Once my friends walk away from us, she raises herself on her feet to whisper in my ear.
“Do you want to go somewhere?”
I furrow my brows, sipping the rest of my drink. “Not really.”
She pouts her dark red lips at me. “Why not?”
I set my empty cup down and lean against a table. “I can’t even see straight right now. You could be a dude in a wig for all I know.”
She laughs a bit at me, but I’m not making jokes. She takes both my hands and traces the curves of her body with them. “Does that prove anything to you?”
A shiver goes up my arms as I feel her body. My head feels like a fucking bowling ball. My legs are frozen but somehow also feel like they’re about to give out. My eyes can’t stay open, I’m starting to wobble, but when I fall forward, she catches me.
“I got you,” she whispers, holding me carefully.
“Where are my brothers?” I ask quietly, unable to speak any louder without feeling like I’m going to projectile vomit.
She looks around the hall we’re in. “Maybe they’re occupied too.”
I shake my head. “No. Take me to them. I have to find my brothers.”
She goes to argue with me, and yeah, she’s hot, but she’s not who I want.
I push myself off of her and struggle to stand. I look like an idiot when I try to walk away. I’m falling into people and trying to open my eyes enough to see either of my siblings. I almost make it to Matt when my body collides into someone else’s. I would’ve been sent through the floor if they hadn’t caught me.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Nick curses at me through gritted teeth. “You look a fucking mess. You’re embarrassing all of us.”
I look up at him and can’t control the way my chin is shaking. I can’t do this right now in front of everyone.
“She’s never going to talk to me again.”
Nick’s face softens. He wraps an arm around me and takes me to a door that leads us outside. He sits me on the ground and stands in front of me. “Yes, she will. She’s just upset right now.”
I shake my head, tears starting to pour out. “You don’t get it. She’s all I wanted. I fucked it up. I rushed into everything. I went too fast. We could’ve been perfect, Nick–”
“Okay!” he interrupts me. “And maybe you just weren’t. Maybe it wasn’t enough. I mean, fuck, Chris!” he runs his hands through his hair. “I’m sorry that you’re heartbroken, I really am, but you can’t keep burrowing your head under the dirt and moping about the same thing. If she’s not talking to you anymore, then that’s on her. You can’t make her want to come back to you. Just give her time, and she’ll come around if she really wants to. If she doesn’t, she’s not who you thought she was. Either way, you need to get your act together. You can mope in your room, but don’t get trashed here in front of everyone.”
The words hit me like a fucking knife, cutting me open after every single one. I feel so hurt that I have to check to make sure I’m not actually bleeding out right now.
I want to kill him for what he said, the way he talked about her, but I’m so weak right now I can’t even move, and by the time I have that strength back in my body, I won’t even remember this interaction.
He sits outside with me and forces me to drink a water, waiting until I’m composed enough to go back inside.
I let that anger towards Sunny rip through me, because I’m tired of being sad.
Me: No one is ever going to love you the way I did
Me: I love you more than anyone else and I always will
Sunny’s POV
Needless to say I thought I was going to throw up when I read that message.
I had barely finished my shift at work, only just clocking out and walking to my car. My bag almost fell out of my hands when I read what he wrote for me.
Chris had been trying to reach out for some time now, but in all honesty, I just needed a break. I needed to get myself back on track and try to piece myself back together after he continued to rip me apart, sew me back together, and rip me apart again. It was exhausting. I was exhausted.
Above all, I love him no matter what our relationship is, so when he texted to make sure I was okay, I of course answered. It may have only been a thumbs up, but it was something, and that’s what he wanted.
No one is ever going to love you the way I did.
Maybe that’s true, but hopefully no one else destroys me like you did too.
I love you more than anyone else and I always will.
Then why did you throw us away?
I let the questions consume me on my drive home, and once I make it to my shower, everything unfolds. I’m a sobbing mess, embarrassed at the control he has over me. I want to scream at him. I want to hate him and never worry about him again.
But he’s the same guy who would ask me if I wanted a Barbie or a Spiderman tattoo when I scraped my knee riding our bikes.
The same guy who would clap my muddy shoes together after we played in the dirt.
The same guy who would wipe my tears when a stupid boy made me cry.
And now he’s that stupid boy, and no one can wipe my tears.
The next morning I woke up angrier than ever.
How dare he do this to me. This back and forth and push and shove, I love you, I can’t be with you, but no one will love you like I do bullshit. I’m tired of it. It’s not fair, and it’s damaging to our friendship, which should be what we’re trying to salvage above anything else.
I’m barely thinking when I reach for my phone and call him. I know he’s probably sleeping, and part of me wants him to wake up and hear me rip him apart for a change, while the other part of me hopes he doesn’t answer so I can say I tried and then never do this shit again.
“Hello?” he groans, his voice a groggy mess. Just as I thought, he’s asleep.
I hate the way my entire body softens at the sound of his voice.
“We need to talk.”
“Right now? he asks. “It’s five in the morning Sun–”
“Do not call me that.”
He sighs. “I get not calling you baby, but now I can’t even call you your nickname?”
“No, Chris, you can’t.”
My tone is clear. I’m a pissed off, worked up mess. He knows that. It’s obvious.
“What did you call me for then?”
My throat tightens. Sharp stabs thrash at my flesh, and then I realize the knives I’m picturing at my neck don’t exist.
My voice breaks slightly, but I cover it up enough. “What the fuck was that text last night?”
He sits up in his bed so fast I can hear the bed shift through the phone. “What text?”
“No one is ever going to love you the way I did, and I love you more than anyone else and I always will,” I enlighten him. “What? You don’t remember!”
He pauses. “Actually… no, I don’t remember.” Silence fills the call. “I was at a party last night. I got drunk, and I texted you. I was busy thinking about how you cut me off entirely after I tried to keep things normal between us, and then while I was drunk I must have had a breakdown and texted you.”
At this point, I’m furious. The words spew out of my mouth before I can think about what I’m saying.
“Did you have fun fucking another girl while you were thinking about me?”
He doesn’t say anything for a moment, clearly thinking about if he should throw a comment back at me, or if he should be the mature one for a change.
“No, Sunny. I didn’t. I was busy sitting outside with Nick drunk off my shit, not thinking straight, trying not to throw up, while I cried over the fact that I thought you hated me and I lost you for good. Was a girl trying to come home with me? Yes. Did I get the fuck away from her because she wasn’t you and no girl will ever fucking be you? Yes, I fucking did.”
Guilt treads through my bloodstream. The snap at him only felt good for a second until he broke the dam that held him together and told me everything he felt about me and him.
“Then why did you break up with me, Chris?” I finally let go and let the tears fall. “Why didn’t you fight for us–”
“I was fighting for you every fucking day, Sunny! Every day! I had to get up every morning and not know when I was going to see my girlfriend. What’s the fun in that?! You and I both know this was the right decision for right now, and if you want to hate me for what I decided to do, then you must not want to be with me in the future, because if I said that I fucking promise that we’ll be together someday, just not now, then that should be enough,” he fires off.
“I’m sorry.”
He inhales deeply, gathering himself again. “Work with me here. I’m promising you that we’re going to make it out of this alright if you just fucking work with me. No more of this back and forth fighting shit. No more of us not hearing the other person out. I want you in my life no matter what it fucking is. Now can you say that you understand and you love me too and that you trust me that this is the right decision so I can go back to bed? I have a hangover, Sunny. Please.”
Someday.
That’s better than never in a million years.
“I love you,” I mumble, even though I’m trying to scream it. “And I trust you.”
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#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#strawberrysturniolo#sturniolo#chris sturniolo x you#chris sturniolo x reader#Spotify
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How they would propose. Killers. Part one.
Trapper, Oni, Wraith, Deathslinger
Trapper
Evan's a traditional guy.
Expect the proposal to be well... Traditional.
Not to say it won't be romantic.
He wants to make sure the event is witnessed.
Preferably by both families.
But being that there are no family members in the realm, it will just be by both survivors and killers.
He's totally getting down on one knee.
While there might not be the most beautiful materials in the realm, he's going out of his way to find or make you a suitable ring.
Don't expect to jump into his arms after.
He really doesn't do all that PDA.
The primary reason to marry when he was in the real world was to produce an heir.
In the realm, that's impossible.
So it's really him claiming you.
You're his, and he's yours.
Oni
Like Trapper, Kazen is a very traditional man.
Weddings in feudal Japan were very different from what is custom now.
He knows that having a proper ceremony is near impossible.
No family, no special clothing, and none of the items needed were available in the realm.
You're already living in the house with him.
And you couldn't have children in the realm anyways.
So there isn't really any point.
But he's also rather dense in the romance/ relationship department.
So there will be a day when he's introducing himself to a new killer and just calls you his wife.
There was no discussion beforehand.
It doesn't seem like a big deal to him.
You're both married.
He loves you, you love him.
That's all there is to it
Wraith
(Because I am unaware of the era he is from, I have to make assumptions based on his ethnicity that is stated by the DBD Wikipedia page and the context clues. It only states that he is Nigerian, not what tribe either. His is based on what information I could gather on the cultures and traditions.)
Being as shy and reserved as he is, this was one of the most nerve wracking things he has ever done.
You have no family in the realm. So he couldn't ask your family.
Philip couldn't provide gifts if there wasn't anything to give.
No traditional gowns and clothing.
No family to celebrate with.
So, he's going to have to wing it.
He'll ask for advice from several of the more mature survivors and killers.
Adam and Sally proved to be the most helpful in planning.
Ace just made gross comments, and Bill just didn't seem to care.
Sally was the only killer willing to help.
It was something simple, but really romantic.
A secluded area the three set up. Lots of flowers and lights.
Since he can't speak, he put the ring on your finger and looked into your eyes in an attempt to convey his message.
What reason would you have to say no?
Deathslinger
Awkward.
Like, really awkward.
Caleb really loves you.
But he's not very good at expressing it.
Giving you a kiss or a hug is about as much as you're going to get.
Proposing?
He's freaking out.
Uh, Evan? Sally? Anyone? Help!
After a meeting and a frantic plea for help, the others pitched in ideas.
A ring? A romantic setting?
God help this man.
There will be many practice sessions.
The others are literally walking him through it the whole time.
They're going to have to be there during the whole thing, even if they practiced for hours!
"Okay, Caleb. Get on one knee."
"Next offer the ring."
"No! Not to me! To them!"
Evan and Sally are about to scream.
But he did it.
They don't even want to think about the wedding.
He's doing his best okay.
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On that thought though...if Alison did lose her gift it would obviously be sad.
But I can't see her moving out the house. And she'd still be able to communicate with them by giving Julian the computer or a phone. She could ask Robin to play with the lights to let her know he was still there. She could ask Fanny to take a selfie with her.
....That is unless something happens to take away their abilities to interact at all.
But still, Alison wouldn't just go back to "normal" after all this time. She'd still celebrate every birthday for them and buy them presents, she'd attend every moonah eclipse celebration, she'd invite them all for movie nights and just...adapt, even if the communication isn't what it once was. She'd probably shelter the baby at first but then when they're grown up prove to them the ghosts were real by asking "Uncle Julian" to type a message.
Maybe that's what will be so bittersweet about the end?
Is it Christmas yet?!
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Happy new year Storm! I hope this ask isn't too long and sprawling. These events took place when I was younger, a bit more foolish about how to behave online as a fan. But it might be illuminating for some of your more aggressive anons, lol.
This thing we keep being pummelled with (about Jikook 'not being sighted together' so therefore not being together) is so tiring.
I remember a few years back I had spent some time in a forum dedicated to another 'are they, are they not' queer couple. Western celebrities, nothing to do with kpop. I was a fan of both these people independently, so I got very curious and intrigued about the idea of them together. On this forum, there was a lot of trying to line up dates of official events/second hand accounts from friends of friends who said they had seen Person A with Person B but never got pics, etc. It was like trying to pin down water in some cases, which frustrated people on the forum who were desperate for 'solid evidence', real confirmation.
One day, a very-famous good friend of Person A, perhaps more famous than either member of this speculated couple, came into my place of work, which was pretty darn exciting on its own. It also contradicted some narratives held on that forum regarding who was where and in which countries at what times. And that made me wonder how many other times that had been the case.
Now naturally, my initial plan was to report back to this forum and tell them about briefly meeting Famous Friend at my work. This was a Mild Scoop after all, another piece to the puzzle, a correction to the records. But a few things stopped me from doing it. I had no photo evidence that this person had been there at all, so it was another 'useless' unverifiable sighting.
But much more importantly, I realised if I posted ANY SPECIFICS WHATSOEVER about who it had been and where it was, then fans with fewer boundaries than I would be able to use my information to stalk. A very determined person could probably even have used the information to figure out whereabouts Famous Friend lived. Famous Friend was apparently a semi-regular at this place, on this occasion they had been with what seemed to be an older family member, and they were clearly dressed to go incognito. Hat and sunglasses indoors, etc. My place of work was somewhere they felt safe enough to go to repeatedly in their downtime, in the knowledge that they wouldn't be bothered or harassed by fans. I didn't want to be the person who ruined that small bit of normalcy for them.
So... I never posted anything to the forum. I just held onto the knowledge in my head that one particular thing wasn't true - Person A and Person B definitely DIDN'T meet with Famous Friend in Countryland at that point, because Famous Friend was in Placecountrytown at my work. I would simply never be able to prove it without compromising the privacy of people involved. And again, I wondered how many other times this could have happened with other people. Maybe this was why it was like trying to pin down water. Maybe that was a wonderful thing, actually.
Going back to Jikook - this is why it seems SO ENTIRELY BELIEVABLE to me whenever we hear that K-Army has stuff and keeps it LOCKED DOWN. That they see them a lot, but rarely let it leak to the international fanbase. That they know stuff we don't and will probably never know. The stakes are so much higher for Jikook if their relationship is a thing. I have no trouble at all believing that there are people all over Korea who have seen them out and about, but not wanted to be the weak link in the chain that breaks their bubble of privacy.
And not hearing about them going places, not seeing photographic evidence of friendships - does NOT mean they are not close. It means that people are doing the decent thing and saying nothing.
I know you know all of this already, but it seems some of your recent anons don't. Sorry again for the rambling message! 😶
I mean, the most recent and prime example is when that white Day photo leaked. Of Jikook with some friends out at a restaurant. K army was PISSED and so were so many other people. Fans started flocking to the restaurant and asking about jikook being there. Servers confirming that they used to come there and had gone there many times. But that they hadn't been coming back lately. And we had never heard of them going there before that leak, when staff stated that they had been coming multiple times before that. They stopped going once that photo was leaked. It was no longer a safe private place for them. Someone compromised that security for them and so they stopped going there. And for the most part k army (and j army too) are VERY protective of BTS, all 7 members. And I'm glad they are. I can't imagine the amount of exhaustion that comes from constantly having your privacy invaded and never knowing who is going to treat you normal or stalk you with their phones out whenever you leave the house. I'm positive all 7 of them, not just jikook, have safe places they like to visit and go to that give them that privacy and security too.
It's incredibly disrespectful to continuously invade their private time and their private life. And it's also incredibly disrespectful to assume they don't have one you aren't apart of because they are so famous. They will have their safe spaces and they deserve more of that. And they shouldn't have those spaces compromised.
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Hey silver there something i thought i should share it to you
But a week ago i saw a tweet from CA ( don’t you why my TL in twitter suggested it for me ) anyway apparently they translated a quote from Ulti saying something about Cloud took A hand and was ready to go with her at the bottom of the abyss than stay on earth or something like that i don’t remember it and CA were really celebrating that since it proved that AC Cloud was ready to die to be with A but i just can’t help but ask are the devs for real saying something like that about Cloud , for years we defended Cloud against those claims and how CA romanize this sick theory of them but then i see devs seriously saying that about Cloud and for who ? For a girl he knew less than a month and leaving his friends behind for her
I just can’t anymore what the devs are thinking is a suicide a message they trying to portray to their story right now ?
I don’t want to believe CA cause they have a history of twisting facts to their favor
Hope to see your answer about that silver
Thank you
They're liars. They're always lying.
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so rough summary of lestappen without dates because im not that knowledge
so born same year. 13 days apart, both libras
started karting, met there, famous interviews , the famous inchident,
max went to single seaters (? like f3 if im not mistaken, again dont really knowledged about the actual motor sport periods that they went through)
charles remained in karting longer (1?2? years)
max got into f3 then straight to f1 in 2016 so they kinda didnt have tangents till charles came to f1 in 2018
at first, like in charles' rookie year, they were like not really friends? but they were talking in interviews about their karting days and whatnot so they were acknowledging eachother but never more than 2 sentences in an interview or a quick chat in the paddock
now, 2019, whole another story
in 2019 charles got to ferrari so he was in a more competitive car (illegal but still competitive)
so they had some fights on the track
most notably, austria 2019, imo the moment lestappen actually started (well the inchident can also be considered a start but i think austria 2019 is more, hm, important? a spark formed there between them so)
so austria. austria would have been the race where charles would have gotten his first win in f1. the place he could prove he deserved the seat at ferrari. but it was already doomed when max made his appearance. i cant recall correctly what happened, and honestly i dont care who pushed off track who and who was in the right, all that matters is that charles was pissed and furious while looking so tempted to murder max on the podium.
charlie boy didnt even spared a glance at max when he was celebrating with champagne, on top of the world, he literally left stomping away.
the thing is, its funny how 2 grown man, who knew each other for such a long time, acted so childish, charles being so annoyed and max being so stubborn and not admitting that he could have done wrong
naturally, they unfollowed eachother on instagram. you know, like adults
but the real and actual hilarious part is that after the race, they both went back home (monaco), in the same plane, so you can guess that there was, aham, tension
but anyway, later that season, charles got his wins and max was getting whatever he could (2019, not a really good year for redbull but what can you do)
2 salty grown man who could hold grudges only like childhood acquaintances
this weird tension and rivalry got to a point where, when in the pandemic, when every driver was doing streams on twitch while sim racing (including these two), they got to play together at some point. the drivers were planning virtual races with eachother, and playing games with eachother. everyone got along and it was all fun. our 2 main characters werent exactly on speaking terms so in most cases they would ask lando to send eachother messages and memes (not frequently but we do know at some point they did ask lando to send stuff to the other)
in 2020 i actually dont remember anything well big happening between them
2021 of course was kinda busy for max because of the championship battle with lewis but if i remember correctly at some point charles praised max and called him talented and a part of his childhood and his rival. honestly i was busy that season, being more focused on the battle so i didnt follow charles and his interviews
now
now 2022 comes
the year of our lord, 2022
ferarri? a compromising car
redbull? reliability issues (at the start of the season)
mercedes? fucking terrible, was clearly not a contender
of course the fate made them two the main rivals of this season
so the battle started strong between lestappen, because what do you expect from 2 people who entire narration of their lives is that they are childhood rivals
charles won the first couple of races, at some point expanding his lead with 50 or something points ahead of max
it honestly looked like an truly iconic title fight, but fuck ferrari and their management of everything and so im not gonna talk about how much they screwed up and got me cursing them out every race. im not. ...
ok so notable lestappen 2022 moments
austria 2022. man everyone called the podium celebrating soft porn and i cant agree more. just. how
every podium they shared and every cooldown room and every Thursday media day they shared. they just delivered something. everytime they got together
oh and maxplain. it started simple really. max had some issues with the car and charles asked what happened after the race and thats how maxplaining was born.
they started to share their opinions on every aspect of the race (well mostly max, charles was content to just listening. which, slay, let your man nerd out)
they started to speak highly of each other so frequently, so much, every race, if they got the chance to talk about the other they would do it
they would joke about their childhood and about how they actually deeply disliked eachother , about how they grew up and started to replace that dislike with respect and understanding and sympathy.
i just cant put into words how interesting their relationship is, how interesting they develop still to this day
max talked about how they would be racing for another 10 15 year together
its so, poetic? took out straight out of a book
they are so iconic frfr.
ugh 2023 has been so lame without the weekly lestappen propaganda
so i cant wait for them to get to race again as they did in 2022
anywayyy hope this wasnt boring and long and lame, my apologies if it was, i just took my thoughts out from my brain and threw them here. i hope they have just a little coherence.
these two truly have more moments that i could have mentioned but i cant really remember. they have too many tbh
anyway yes. lestappen 🔛🔝
this is the most incredible answer to my plea anon, thank you so much.
i'm just getting into f1 so i knew some but i didn't know a lot but my jaw DROPPED. what do you mean they're only born 13 days apart, they grew up together not quite liking each other but also destined to forever be on the same path
i went and watched the austria 2019 and 2022 podiums and i cannot make this shit up literally typing it out just feels like fanfic, it feels poetic. the CONTRAST with their worst and best moment being at the same race? jesus
i was a believer before, but now i'm pious. you've fully converted me. with the sheer amount of history between them there was never going to be room for indifference. the idea of the other person being their only true equal god i eat that shit UP i fear these two are going to haunt my brain for a while
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Enough is Full of Romance Part 3 - Yet Another Surprise!
Where 2 brilliant talented people fall in love and navigate a life filled with paprazzi, rumors and a private romance after being introduced by their common friend. They say wrong person, right timing is a real thing but Ben and Y/N know they have a deep connection and they will wait for however long it takes!
Warnings: None
Series Masterlist
2.8k words
It had now been quite some time since your encounter with Ben. He had not tried to contact you and neither did you. However, your Instagram post with him did prove to the world that you had met your favorite celebrity. It was a nice picture. Simple enough to not spark rumors but it still did anyway. Finally met Sirius Black! # Fangirl you had written.
You were sure that Ben had seen the post because that is what Andrew told you. He had not pried into the matter and you were grateful. Not because you did not want to tell him but because you did not know what to say. It had all happened so suddenly. One moment you were about to kiss and the next, your past was driving away your present.
You were in your bed buried under the sheets when your phone buzzed.
"Y/N Y/L/N is currently suffering from identity crisis. Please leave a message." You said and hung up.
It buzzed again and answering, you groaned into the phone. "It's 8 in the morning. What do you want, Ands?"
"I feel like you have wallowed in self pity long enough, now get up." His voice said on the other end of the line.
"No. Anything else?"
You heard him sigh. "It's just an award, Y/N. How long will this go on for? It's been a week!"
"I am not even going to respond to that... Besides, I am not wallowing any more. Madison is coming over."
You said the name too softly and quietly for him to hear, knowing his reaction already. He didn't like her one bit. Claimed that she is not good for you. You disagreed. You had met her only a few months back but you had become quite close. She was there for you when you needed her. She was a little loud at times but she always made sure you felt appreciated even if... No no. She was a nice person and a good friend. Andrew had nothing to worry about.
"Who?" He asked.
"Just... Just a friend," you mumbled.
"Y/N..." He said, his tone serious.
"Madison."
"Y/N, we have had this conversation million of times... You-"
"So you know that she is a good friend who offered to be with me when I just lost an award."
"I-I didn't mean it that way, darling." Your best friend's voice softened instantly at your jab. "I just didn't want you losing your sleep and happiness over an award, doesn't matter whichever one it is. Your fans, family and friends are the testament to how impactful and amazing your music truly is."
"You truly think that?" You asked, finally peaking your head out from under heavy blanket.
"I do, Y/N. I really do."
"Thank you, Ands. I needed that."
Your phone conversation was cut off when your bell rang.
Andrew sighed, again. "Well, that's my cue. Call soon." He said and hung up.
You rolled out of bed, still in your blanket and dragged yourself to the door, opening it slowly.
"You look like shit." Madison said, eyeing you from head to toe. She walked past you into the kitchen and put her shopping bags on the table.
"Wow, thanks, Mads." You tried to sound sarcastic but already growing conscious about you unwashed hair and white tshirt with ketch up and mustard stains on it.
"I told you to stay away from burgers, Y/N. It doesn't look good on you. Especially the cheese ones." She added.
It was your turn to look at her. Her shiny, flowy hair, perfect face with the perfect sun glasses on them, perfect tank top and shorts highlighting her form in the perfect places.
"But it's my comfort food," you mumbled softly to yourself.
"Anyway, you need to clean yourself up so that I can start cheering you up." She moved you towards your room. "And look what a mess you've been living in!"
Your cheeks suddenly flamed when you remembered the cheese burgers you've had in the last few days and discarded their wrappers not bothering to look for a dustbin.
"I have to go make a few calls meanwhile you, clean up your room and take a bath..." She said, pushing you gently towards the bathroom.
"Fine, fine." You surrendered. "Wait, why do you have shopping bags at 8:30 in the morning?"
"Oh, you'll see." She said and walked out the room, shutting the door behind her.
"Maybe I do need to dial down on the cheese burgers," you sighed and started picking up your mess. You first collected all the pieces of trash and threw them in a dustbin, but then remembering you might as well take out the trash. Madison was on the phone when you asked for her help so that's why she probably didn't hear you.
You then focused on the bed. You changed the sheets and put the old ones in the washer. Neatly arranged your blanket and finally went for a bath. You washed and scrubbed and shaved and finally breath in relief when you felt like you were feeling better.
"My, my, don't you look fantastic." Madison said, the moment you walked out. "Some might say, you look even prettier than I do!"
Her voice had a hint of seriousness and you did not like it.
"I am only joking, Y/N. Now let's go!" She handed you your bag and phone and putting her arm through your arm, she started towards the door with car keys in her hand.
"Wait, who is that?" Your eyes suddenly widened at the sight of strange men in your kitchen. "What are they doing here, Mads?"
"You’ll see. Now let’s go!" She pulled you out the door and into her car and started driving.
"Can you at least tell me where we are going?"
"Oh you will see. It is the perfect place."
She drove in silence for a while before asking you a question she seemed like she wanted to ask since forever. "I heard there was a guy in the scene. What happened."
What happened was the question that you had been asking yourself, too. Maybe talking about it with someone else would help. Because you knew Mads would understand.
"It’s - it’s kinda complicated, Mads but -"
"Oh, hey, that’s okay. I get it. You will never believe what just happened."
"Oh... okay, then." You said with a tinge of sadness.
"So I went to Starbies to get us some coffees but on the way over I got so sleepy so I had to drink yours, too. Well, it’s not like you aren’t going to treat me now hahahaha."
"Sure I will." You said, slightly amused, slightly confused.
Soon she stopped in front of a dress store. "Retail therapy," she winked.
She barged into the store as if she owned and started exploring.
"Mads..." You said softly. "This place is pretty expensive."
"But it is worth it. See," she said, holding up a black strap less to your face.
The moment your eyes fell on that dress. you fell in love with it. With a mischievous smile on your face, you took it to the changing room. But a part of you that was refusing was right. It really was not your style.
You stepped out shyly, looking for Madison.
"Oh... " She said when her eyes fell on you. "You look beautiful." Her tone was that serious one again, as if she did not like it.
"I - I shouldn’t right. I’ll put it back on the rack."
"No," she said firmly. "This is what you are wearing for the rest of the day. I don’t want to hear anything else."
You knew arguing with her was futile so you watched her shop for the next hour or so silently, scrolling on your phone, noticing fans and looking at edits. Soon, it was time to go.
"I am sorry, Sarah, is there anyway to pay for it while keeping it on?" Madison asked the women at the check out, reading her name tag.
"Sure," she said and brought some high-tech wand to remove the magnet and scanned the code.
Madison pulled out the tag while you handed her your card.
"Shall I bill these together, ma’am?" Sarah asked looking at Madison's dresses at the counter.
"Oh, for sure." She answered.
Too stunned to know how to respond to that, you just gave a small smile. She collected your card from her and walked out with you, linking her arm with yours again.
With more than 3 bags already in her hand, Madison took you to four more such stores where she shopped and you waited. You were thankful for your fully charged phone without which you would have died of boredom.
She then took you to a fancy cafe and a makeup store and got done a full face make up for both of you. But you had admit, it went pretty well with the eyes. Smoky black eyes and dark lipstick seemed to complete your look.
"Come on, Mads, I am ready to go back, please."
"Fine fine," she replied and got into the car, throwing her bags of over expensive clothes on the back seat.
"You are awfully quiet and I am scared of that. What is going on?"
"You’ll see."
You brain was alrerting out SOS alarms but you know it was of no use. Madison's smirk had started intensifying halfway and it had only worried you more.
When she finally pulled into your driveway, you breathed a sigh of relief and rushed towards the door, your friend close behind. The house was dark considering you had left it almost 12 hours ago with random men.
"You have to tellme what is going on before I lose my mind, Mads!" You pleaded, reaching for the switch.
The moment you turned the light on, you heard people yelling from behind.
"Surprise!"
There were over 50 people in your house with each wall decorated with party lights and... pictures of Madison?
Recovering from the shock, your eyes finally fell on Andrew, as handsome as ever waiting for you to notice him.
"No way," you shook your heads and jumped into his arms. He welcomed you by lifting you up and spinning you around. "How am I ever going to equal up to so many surprises?"
He laughed and put you down, placing a gentle kiss on your cheek. Your eyes then scanned the room, recognising almost no one except three people.
"Thank you, Mads... This is amazing!" You brought her into a hug as well. "Who are all these people, though?"
"Oh, these are just my friends."
She cleared her throat loudly, bringing everyone's attention to her and grabbed a champagne glass. "Ladies and gentlemen," she started. "Today, I stand before you to express my deepest appreciation for someone truly remarkable in my life. Your unwavering support and unending loyalty have uplifted my spirits and propelled me towards greatness. Your presence has made me shine brighter, and I cherish how our friendship has shaped me into the remarkable person I am today. Thank you for being my constant reminder of how fabulous I truly am. Cheers to us, my dear friend."
The crowd cheered and clapped. All, except Andrew. You simply gave him a questioning look but he didn't respond.
"Hey, what's with pictures of you?" He asked suddenly, his voice laced with sarcasm. "I thought this was a party in Y/N's honour."
"Yeah, a party which I arranged," she replied in the same tone. "It's a practical joke, come on people! Anyway, let's party!!"
The crowd cheered once again and went back to what they were doing, your presence forgotten by all but one.
"We need to talk," Andrew whispered and dragged you with him to the balcony. "This is not okay!"
"What is not okay, Ands? And can you please not pull me like that. I've been enduring that all day!"
"I am sorry... But that's what I am talking about. Do you not see what she is doing?" His anger made the gentleness in his voice disappear but you knew he was just looking out for you.
"She just hosted a party, what is wrong with that?"
"How can you be that blind, y/n/n? Please wake up. She is -"
"Y/N!" Madison called from behind you. You turned around and saw her approaching you. "Am I interrupting something?" She asked a little too sweetly.
"Actually, we were in the middle of-"
"I wanted to introduce you to everyone. Come." Without another glance at Andrew, she pulled you by your arm and started taking you around the room.
Andrew did not miss how you wanted to run away and were visibly frustrated of being pulled around. He made a mental note to apologise to you again for dragging you to the balcony.
You were barely registering names or faces as she led you through a sea of people you had never even seen before. They were apparently Madison's online friends who now had your address. You shook hands and have smiles to everyone until you could not take any more.
"Okay, everyone out!" She screamed out of nowhere. "Y/N is tired and would like some peace with only her best friend."
"Wait, what?" Before you could stop them, the people had already started leaving, giving you weird looks.
Andrew was in the kitchen helping himself to some snacks when Madison cleared her throat.
"It's okay, Mads. He is my best friend, too. He should stay."
"I don't see why but if that's what you want."
Asking Andrew to shut up, you called him and sat down on the floor next to her with Andrew to your right.
"What now?" You asked.
"Let's watch a movie or something." Andrew suggested.
"Yeah, let's do a Ben Barnes marathon!" Madison suggested. She didn't notice the way your eyes filled with sadness or the way Andrew clenched his jaw. "Which one? Avengers? Maze Runner? Blended? The -"
"Okay, he is not in any of them. Have you seriously watched NONE of his movies?" You asked and she simply shrugged.
The bell rang again and Madison practical jumped up to open the door. "Time for one more surprise."
"This night is turning out to be the night on tour and I don't want it to be like that again. Especially the second surprise." You buried your face into his shoulder.
"Oh, don't worry. I am sure it isn't Ben. Maybe just pizza."
He was wrong. Because it was Ben.
"Where were you, Ben?" You head Madison giggle. "I have been waiting! I am such a huge fan! I love all your movies!"
"Did her voice just change?" Andrew asked.
"Wow, what kind of party takes place on the floor with only three people?" He asked, reaching you.
You looked up and regretted it instantly. He had become even more handsome and you wanted to burst into tears as that night came back to you.
"This one apparently," Andrew answered.
"Oh, shut up," Madison scolded and sat down next to you, Ben opposite to her.
"You look beautiful, Y/N," he complimented sincerely.
"Thank -"
"You came at the right time!" Madison chimed. "We were just about to play Spin the Bottle!"
"We were?" Andrew mouthed and made a gagging face. He would rather die than be any where close to Madison.
Without waiting for anyone's reply, she grabbed an empty champagne bottle and spun it.
Much to his dismay, the two ends pointes to Andrew and Madison.
"No, ew, no way."
You laughed at how unbelievably adorable he was. He made no attempt to hide his hate for her and Ben saw that, too.
Ben, the one person who's gaze you were trying to avoid. But since your best friend had made so many efforts at trying to invite him, you sat quietly.
"Fine, fine," she rolled her eyes and spun it again. It landed on you and Ben. He didn't know how to respond or what to do. His eyes looked at you in confusion... and sadness. Your gaze instantly went to Andrew, silently asking for help.
"No, this game is ridiculous, Madison! We are not teenagers at some silly party!"
"But we are at a party," she huffed and spun it again.
Ben's eyes widened as it landed on him again, but with Madison.
Ben looked too uncomfortable to participate in this. Besides, Mads was your best friend and would not kiss him. Even for some stupid game.
But you were wrong, because that is exactly what she did.
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Taglist: @padfootagain
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Hi, I just saw the ask about quackity and dream and found out that there has been some shitty stuff happening apparently. I guess i have been living under a rock because i have no clue what is going on. And it goes back to dsmp season 2 finale? I have not been watching dsmp actively, i got into it very late and even then mainly kept to philzas and technos perspective so i had no clue. Would you be up to explain what it was that happened and why dream is such a shitty person? I genuinely want to understand because i am so confused and i can't find the right information right now... (or my English is too bad to understand it) or do you maybe have a link to somewhere where the whole situation is explained? (i feel bad because i really enjoyed watching the manhunts, even if i thought dream was often a bit too arrogant...)
hey anon. this is a bit of a tough subject for me, but hopefully i can give a good explanation.
last october, it was revealed that dream had preyed on underage fans. two girls, amanda and anastasia, came forward and said he had pursued relationships with them and sent them sexual messages and photos. the girls were seventeen while he was in his twenties, and there are screenshots (that dream himself confirmed were real) proving that he was in close contact with them. he met these girls because they sent him messages telling him how much they idolized him, with one even saying she credited his content with helping her while she was suicidal, and he took advantage of that to prey on them. what he did was illegal and an abuse of his power as a celebrity.
many of the original tweets and screenshots have been deleted due to the insane amount of harassment the victims received from his fanbase, but most of them have been archived here: https://twitter.com/thecatslime/status/1648161403302301696?s=46&t=Zf6PP1ewme9bxK8DC5UOCw
if there’s any part of this i can clarify for you or that you need explained further, feel free to let me know.
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The Do's and Don't of Copyright for Authors
Photo by Tara Winstead
Note: I'm not an attorney. I'm a business school dropout who hangs around a lot of attorneys (it's the hazard of being a romance author). If you are a copyright attorney and would like to correct me or chime in to add additional information PLEASE do.
Do Post a Copyright Statement At The Beginning of Your Book
The easiest way and cheapest way to claim copyright over your book is by adding a simple copyright statement at the beginning of your book. The moment you do that you are legally claiming ownership of your book. Here are some samples that you can use in your book.
Don't Use lyrics of songs or poems
I used to love using lyrics and poems in the chapter headings of my books. But those lyrics or poems are someone's else intellectual property and the moment use them (EVEN IF YOU CREDIT THEM) you have committed copyright infringement. The only way you can get around this particular rule is by using public-domain songs and poems.
I used a John Keats poem in the heading of my book 'Fall into You'. I could do that because Keat's poems are public domain.
Do Get Your Book Copyrighted
Another thing that you should do as an author is to get your book copyrighted through the U.S. Copyright Office. It only costs $50 and you will have a legal document with proof of your ownership of your book. This comes in handy when someone pirates your book and you need to prove to Amazon that you are indeed the copyright owner. It's real, legal, concentrate proof that your book IS YOUR BOOK without having to go to court over it.
Also, if you ever need go to court over your book and sue for copyright infringement? This will make your life easier.
Note: People outside of the United States need to check with their own government's copyright office.
Don't Use Celebrity Images For Marketing
I don't know about you, but I used to be a fanfic writer. And fanfic writers have a habit of using celebrities and models as their faceclaims. And that was fine because your were not getting any money for your story. YOU CAN'T DO THAT ANYMORE! No, don't get it twisted, you might get away with it for a while, but the moment you are using unlicensed images for profit you can get sued.
No matter how small an author you are. You are a business using someone's intellectual property without A) paying them for their labor and B) without the consent of the model and the photographer.
Do Use Stock Images
I know it sucks you can't use celebrity images anymore but guess what? You can get license stock photos on the cheap. I pay for adobe stock every month and I get 10 images a month for like $30. You also find cheap stock photos in places like creative market or Depositphotos. You might be a lot less limited in what you can use but it beats getting sued by an angry photographer or model.
Do Use Public Domain Images
Public Domain images are so awesome. I use them all the time. The best place to get them at the official public domain directory but for quality photos you should absolutely use Pexles.com. Not only on Pexels most photos are free, but you can usually message the photographer about any possible licensing conditions.
Don't Use Pinterest Images for Marketing or Cover Photos
I love Pinterest to get ideas on cover art styles, fonts, and marketing ideas. I love using Pinterest to get character references that I use privately and NOT for public marketing of my book. But I saw an author use an image of a well-known model that they got off of Pinterest to use for the cover of their book. THIS IS COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT and you can be sued for this.
Oh, you can get away with it for a while but eventually, someone is going to notice and YOU WILL GET SUED. Always remember that the moment you started selling books, is the moment you have become a business. A business can be sued for various reasons. Ask Nike about this.
(Custom Art from Seth Smith that I was gifted)
Do Get Character Portraits from Artists
Artists and Authors go together like peas and carrots. Every author I know is getting custom character portraits and clench covers. We love to see it. It's artists helping artists. I firmly believe in supporting the arts. And those custom art commissions CAN be used in stuff like merch or book promotions. Just make sure that your artist gives you clear instructions on how your commission can be used. Some artists will give conditions on how and when those custom art pieces can be used. Note: make sure you get all of that in writing.
Do Not Use A.I. Art or Avatar Generators In Your Marketing
I'm very anti-A.I. First of all, A. I generated content is a copyright landmine. Recently the U.S. Copyright Office stated clearly that only HUMAN-created content can get copyrighted. So if you are using A.I. stuff you may have no legal recourse if someone decides to steal your content. Another reason that using A.I. is awful is that A.I. is trained in other artists' works. A.I. generated art does not exist in a vacuum and the artists whose work is used to produce those pieces often did not consent nor get paid for people to use their work.
We talk about piracy all the time, but most authors don't realize that they are essentially committing piracy (and art theft) when they use A. I art.
Do Digital Watermark Advance Readers' Copies
Speaking of Piracy, You as the owner of your intellectual property have every right to protect your property in any way you see fit. One of the best ways to protect your advanced reader's copies is by digitally watermarking your Advance Reader Copies. There are also services in which they will take down any pirated copies they find on the internet for a monthly or annual fee.
Do Not Use Use Copyright Images and Stills from Movies in Your Promo!
Using book comps can be essential to marketing your book. Book comps are usually things like Beauty and the Beast X Avatar in marketing or when pitching your book to an agent. You can not use copyrighted images from your favorite tv shows and movies in your book promo. Remember you have to license any images you use in your book promo.
I accidentally did this in my book promo for 'More to Love' and I took it down the moment I realized it. As a business, you have to be aware of what assets such as music, photos, and videos you can and can not legally use.
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Internet scammers or impersonating a famous person.
I guess I'm not the only person who stumbles upon a celebrity on social media platforms. I also countless "Chris Evans", "Tom Felton" or most "Luke Evans". At first I ignored, reported and banned them. But in the past few days I can't tell you how many times I've received a message from Luke. To be honest, it left me cold. I didn't report it or ban it. But it was there for message requests until recently. Curiosity poked my beak. What could a cheater want? How does he sell himself to naive, gullible people, that he really is our favorite actor or singer. In this case, an actor. I don't even know how long I considered answering him. No,not because I thought Luke Evans wrote to me. But so that I can write this post, so that no one makes the mistake of becoming a victim of a scammer. Because unfortunately there are gullible people.
So where do I start!
Yes, maybe when I wrote back to him. I was completely aware of the fact that he thinks that here is a naive person who will be his victim. But the little bastards didn't know, he wrote to the wrong person, they didn't fall on my head. So it can be suspicious when he writes "Thank you for being a big fan!" I don't think a real celebrity would start a conversation like that. The answers were quite striking. "The real Luke does." Well, my dear little man didn't connect here. He asked the question "How long have I been your fan?" I laughed a lot here.
How can someone be such an idiot? That is the basis of my answer, he did not take the sheet. He's a really unscrupulous person, he didn't give up trying to make me believe that he was Luke.
There was nothing special in the conversation after that, he asked me what I do for a living. (I think it's because he knows how much I earn) He got the answer. Then he brought up some fan card to see if I got it. He got angry when I said no. But that's not so important.
He didn't waste much time after that.
"I have a problem," he wrote to me. Here I guessed what would happen. "The site I'm working on won't let me access it until I pay the $200 fee" You know what he wanted right? I pretty much ignore thisI left. In other words, he got a nice answer. Here the picture came together, I guessed what he wanted, not only this person, but all the fraudsters.
"Now comes the helping part. Which means I'll pay. Shhh, you scammers always come up with that. You can't be fooled! LIKE I SAID, I MANAGED TO BUMP 3 SCAMMERS WHO WRITE TO ME AS LUKE ENAVS! I'm glad I did it I would attract the attention of those who naively believed in scammers, "From the first minute I knew you were a FRAUD!"
I answered him. Of course, the part that I knocked down three is not true. As I said, I didn't deal with them.
Not surprisingly, he wasn't interested in that either! He kept insisting that he wasn't a cheater, that he was really Luke. I'm starting to lose my patience here. But I took a deep breath and continued talking to him. I was wondering what else he was trying. I didn't have to wait long. He wanted me to pay him $200 and I could tell him everything about him. What a pathetic person, isn't he? Guess what I answered him. A sharp, ironic answer. But he didn't give up! He just said and said and said and said. Then he brought it up so he could prove it was Luke Evans. You met him, for which of course I have to pay. At this point my mind snapped, I didn't respond with nice words. I thought he was finally coming to his senses. But nothing, as if he didn't understand what I wrote to him. You pathetic, spineless dick!
After that, he tried to convince me, which was of course useless.
"Let's close this conversation. I had fun. I have gained enough information and experience to write about in my blog. The title is: Internet scammers or people who pretend to be celebrities."
I wrote to her! I hoped that he finally realized that he can't take advantage of me.
"It's not pretend"
He didn't want to give up again.
"Oh sure. I'm Saint Mary if you're Luke"
And I ended with this last sentence. Fortunately, he didn't write back. I think he understood that there is nothing going on with me.
So I hope many people will read it, it will reach people who can be persuaded. There are naive people, whether young or old. After all, scammers wouldn't do it either if there wasn't someone who couldn't be scammed.
(I'm sorry if I wrote something wrong. I'm Hungarian and I don't speak English perfectly. But I wanted it to be read not only by my compatriots)
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little situation | part 23.
Summary: For years, HYDRA had been trying to use the samples of Steve’s DNA to make another super-soldier. They finally succeed and when S.H.I.E.L.D. breaks her out, Cap is forced to come face to face with his kid and figure out parenting on an Avengers’ lifestyle.
Warnings: maybe potential childhood trauma but nothing really
Pairing: Steve Rogers x blackdaughter!reader, avengers x child!reader, peter parker x black!reader
Word Count: 2.7k
Previous Part | (Series Masterlist)
“Wait, so, Uncle Tony got pissed at you?” You asked, walking with Ned and Peter to the bodega before heading to Peter’s.
“Mainly that I almost drowned. He says I should stay the friendly neighborhood spider but the problems are coming into the neighborhood,” Peter said frustrated as he looked at the drinks in the fridge.
“I think he’s just worried. Sometimes he doesn’t even like when I go on missions alone, you’ve just got to prove that you can be an Avenger.”
“If they ever let me.”
“Don’t say that, of course they will. You said you found Chitauri weapons, don’t let a setback like Uncle Tony’s temper tantrum throw you from your job. Was the party fun at least?”
Peter shrugged. “It was fine.”
“He actually talked to Liz,” Ned offered.
Peter shook his head when you gave him an excited yet questioning face. “She’s cool.”
“Cool? That’s it, I thought this was the girl you had been crushing on since freshman year?”
“Crushing was a strong word.”
“You know what else was strong, your staring.”
“It was cause we hadn’t seen her since last summer. I talked to her, she’s cool. I guess I still like her, just think I’ve started to notice someone else.”
You guys made your way to the checkout. You and Ned both questioned Peter but he didn’t say anything. He grabbed the snacks out of your hand and paid for them before you got the chance to take out your wallet like usual. Peter blinked in surprise when you suddenly were right in his face.
“I’ll find out who this mystery girl is. You can’t hide her from me forever… damn, can’t come over anymore,” you read a message off of your phone. “I just made Prima in company.”
“When did you join a real ballet studio?”
“Well I didn’t. Aleisha Dupont, from France did… now if you boys excuse me, I have a wig to change into, some prosthetics to put on and a headmaster whose face is about to meet the end of my pointe shoe. Bye, Ned, Peter Parker.”
You gave both boys a peck on the cheek and darted out the bodega where Happy’s car was pulled up. Happy drove carefully so you could apply your makeup and secure the black straight wig with bangs. It was a small mission technically but you loved any mission that let you do solo work. Not because you didn’t love the team but team missions were usually always smash a few things and lots of fighting, solo missions for you tended to be spy work and if someone has to die it’s discreet without much of a fight.
“Aleisha!”
You ran to your friends and hugged them.
“We heard about Prima, the whole company is talking.”
“It’s too bad I can’t enjoy it.”
“Can’t enjoy it.”
“Mon pere, we’re moving back to France. Today’s my last day.”
“No, really? Well, we should celebrate our 24 hour prima. Let’s go, I want a good spot at the barre.”
You stayed behind when everyone else had cleared out to talk to the headmaster. Well, there wasn’t any talking. You hit him upside the temple with the pointe shoe when he was in the hallway and dragged him back into his office to prop him up in his chair. Humming the Dance of the Little Swans, you turned on the electric kettle and poured him a cup— making it the exact way you’ve observed him do it for the past few months.
The headmaster started to wake up so you hit him with your shoe again. While the tea cooled, you took off the wig and makeup. You sat on the desk and waited until S.H.I.E.L.D. agents had come in to take him away. You sipped on the tea as Sharon and Maria entered to help look through files.
“You know, he might be evil but this cup of tea is nothing but heavenly. I’m definitely stealing this recipe.”
The two women looked at you and you stretched out the cup towards them.
“You want me to make you one?”
Sharon laughed. “I think we’re good. Your dads are outside with the car.”
You put on your other pointe shoe and hopped down from the desk. The agents tried not to laugh as you danced out of the office and towards the front door. Steve and Sam were waiting in the car so you guys could drive to the airport for vacation. Principal Morita had signed off on your document that stated you’d be out of school for Thursday and Friday. They shook their heads as you danced all the way to the car, stopping on the steps for the ending of your performance. Both men clapped, unenthusiastically, when you finished. You connected your phone to the car’s Bluetooth system. Sam and Steve looked at each other when your music came on.
“And this would be?” Steve asked.
“Britney Spears… All eyes on me in the center of a ring just like a circus!”
Sam and Steve were subjected to the whims of their teenage daughter all the way to the airport, a ride made unnecessarily longer due to traffic. Your music taste was diverse and often along the lines of Steve and Sam but that particular car ride you only wanted to listen to your pop divas. So Beyonce, Britney Spears, Ariana Grande, and Diana Ross were a few of the artists they had to listen to.
You pulled up to the airport, Steve paying for the days the car would be parked there, and found a nice spot currently away from all the other cars. You asked Sam to record a video for you to send to Ned, MJ, and Peter. You turned the volume all the way up in the car as “I’m Coming Out” started to play. Sam filmed as you stepped out the car dramatically in time to the words and did a goofy strut until you approached the camera.
“Hope you guys win decathlon! I’ll be sending you nothing but good vibes from sunny California!”
Steve felt your head practically slam against his shoulder as you fell asleep halfway through the flight. You were thinking maybe you guys shouldn’t have tried to be normal citizens and should’ve taken the quinjet instead because you were not prepared for the flight time to still be so long. When you guys landed you turned off airplane mode on your phone to see a couple texts had come in. You opened the one from Peter that was a video.
“Have fun in Cali, wish we were there with you.”
“Liz asked Peter to the dance!” Ned popped up behind Peter. “Right in front of everyone on the team.”
“Ned, I’m sure Sarah doesn’t care… it’s not that big a deal. Gotta go, we’re still practicing. See you soon.”
The video cut off rather abruptly. The other messages were from Ned and MJ that were just texts thanking you for the good luck and hoping you enjoy your vacation.
The Big Thunder Suite at the Disneyland Hotel wasn’t as bad as you thought. You wanted to stay in the FairyTale Suite— Steve and Sam did not. But the copper tub in the suite was a good enough consolation prize for you. You flopped onto the bed with excitement before changing into sweats and joining your fathers downstairs for dinner.
“I’ve got the whole park planned so we can see everything!” you said excitedly, barely chewing your food before swallowing.
Steve gave Sam an amused smile. “She’s got the whole thing planned.”
“Whole thing?”
“Whole thing.”
“I hate you both.” You rolled your eyes while both men laughed at your expense.
The first day did not go as planned. You, Steve, and Sam had the uncanny ability to forget that you were well-known Avengers resulting in lots of kids coming up to you three— especially Sam and Steve. You guys had sat down to get lunch when one child recognized Steve first. You and Sam had ducked your heads down but the kid took one glance and recognized you too.
Before Sam and Steve could process what was happening, you left the area, forcing them to deal with the growing line of kids wanting pictures with Captain America and Falcon and the apologies of their parents who tried to tell them that the two men just wanted to enjoy the park. Sam and Steve were glad to take pictures and sign autographs. You thought you were in the clear until you stumbled into the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique.
Both men looked around once the line had gotten smaller and tried to find you. Sam grabbed his phone to text you when he got a message sent from the PR team, it was a link to Twitter. Someone had posted a photo of you at the boutique and a line of children now wanting makeovers from America’s Darling. They scrolled through Twitter, your name now trending, and saw various photos and videos:
You gasped when you saw the little girl with (f/c) hearing aids approach the station that the employees let you have. She gave you a little wave. You pointed to your own hearing aids and she nodded excitedly.
We match!
You looked up to see her parents.
She begged for your color, it’s not even her favorite, her dad signed.
You’ve given her so much confidence that she can do anything, her mom signed.
You looked back at the little girl. I think one large Avenger sized makeover is what we want.
Another video popped of you getting asked questions as you left the salon, not getting farther than the bench right outside.
“Is all the glitter because of pixie dust?”
“Glitter?”
“Your skin!”
You laughed when you realized they were talking about the diamond. Whenever you got hit with something, you see the sparkle of the diamond briefly upon impact as the area became super tough to stop the damage. The kids looked at you patiently, expecting an answer and you weren’t about to spoil magic for them in the middle of Disneyland. Their fifth grade history class can do that for you.
“Yes. My mom was a fairy.”
The kids gasped in amazement.
“Was your mom a tinker fairy? Is that why you’re so good at making things?”
When you nodded the children started chanting ‘TinkerDarling’. Steve laughed when he heard on the video one kid say in wonder that Captain America was once married to a fairy.
“Should we go save her?”
“Probably.”
They got to the area where you were but saw you already had another savior approaching.
“Peter!” The kids yelled, making you turn your head to see Peter Pan.
“Hey, kids. Tink and I are needed in Neverland, Captain Hook is back to his evil ways.” He made a face causing the kids to gasp. “We’re sorry to leave you but remember to always have faith, trust, say it with me… and pixie dust! Come on, TinkerDarling.”
Peter Pan stuck out a hand that you gladly grabbed and he whisked you towards the stand labelled Maurice’s Treats where Steve and Sam were. He dropped you off.
“Thank you.”
“Any time, TinkerDarling,” Peter Pan broke character for a moment. “You know that’s staying.”
“It’s already trending,” Sam said as he held up the phone.
Your phone rang and you answered it while waving a goodbye to Peter Pan. Tony’s voice came through the phone.
“For the record, I got the Tinkerbell nickname I wanted.”
“Bye Uncle Tony.”
“Bye, TinkerDar—”
You shoved the phone back in your shorts’ pocket. The park saved you guys as it came on through the speakers that the Avengers were in the park for a mission to stop HYDRA agents hiding in Disney and that if any children see through their disguise to pretend they don’t know you— as well as report any HYDRA looking activity to another Disney character and they’ll find the Avengers right away. You were able to move through the rest of the park relatively seamlessly, children pointing and shushing each other or giving you all winks excited that they were assisting on such an important “mission”.
You made Sam and Steve take lots of pictures, complaining that you’d have nowhere to post them— instead of buying into your guilt trip, Steve simply sent the pictures to the PR team and said now they’d be posted. Rolling your eyes, you followed the two of them to the next ride, Sam’s pick. The park had you absolutely worn out by the time you guys left on the night of Day 2. You flopped onto the bed of the hotel room.
~~
Peter smiled looking at the text from his phone. It was a video from you once you had gotten back home from the park.
“Hey Peter Parker, guess what happened. I’m officially a Disney fairy. Well, not really but for about two hours I was the fairy leader of a small army under the age of ten that wouldn’t leave me alone. And you’ll never guess who my savior was? Peter Pan! Don’t worry, you’re still the cuter Peter. Have fun at decathlon, do your best! I hope you guys win. I know you’re smart so it shouldn’t be a problem. Knock ‘em dead, Spider-man. I’ll send a little pixie dust your way, just for luck.”
You laughed as you wiggled your fingers.
“This is your TinkerDarling, signing off.”
He needed something to boost his morale as he watched the rest of the decathlon team have fun at the pool. He had a job to do. Yeah, being with other students was fun but he had a job to do, to prove to the other Avengers especially Tony. Peter pulled on his mask. Knock ‘em dead, Spider-man ringing through his head.
~~
“What if you had a Disney wedding?” You asked while you guys waited for the Animation Academy drawing class to start.
“Babydoll, I think you’re the only one who is that obsessed with Disney here.”
“Yeah, I like Disney but I don’t think I want Mickey officiating our ceremony. How about the beach?” Sam asked Steve.
“Beach is fine or maybe a barnyard venue.”
“We could ask Clint, doesn’t seem like a bad idea.”
They continued to talk about ideas quietly, you offering input at certain ideas, while the animator taught everyone how to draw Pooh Bear.
~~
You hit Peter in the chest when you saw him with Ned in the hallway as everyone cleared out to head to their last class of the day.
“Ow, what was that for?”
“Washington? What the hell, Peter?! Why did I find out from the news instead of you that the Washington Monument almost collapsed?”
“How’d you know it was me? I cleared the area before anyone showed up.”
“How long have I been an Avenger… Ned told me.”
“Well you were on vacation and I didn’t want you to be distracted.”
“Next time, distract me, I don’t care. And how am I supposed to cover for you if I don’t know what to cover for?”
“Well it wasn’t exactly planned.”
“I’m serious.”
“Okay, okay. I’ll text you after.”
“Thank you. Oh, I got these for you two.”
You handed Ned a pair of Mickey ears and presented Peter with the Peter Pan hat, making him laugh. You adjusted the hat on his head.
“Thank you, TinkerDarling.”
“I’m gonna let that slide only because I’m about to say the dumbest thing ever.”
“Does it involve you telling me you’re actually made of pixie dust… you’re joking.”
“Not quite pixie dust, but twirl me.”
Peter grabbed your hand and spun you. He and Ned wowed as you made your skin glitter.
“The kids got me thinking about if I could harden the diamond on command, without having to get hit, you know.”
“Oh now I’m really not letting it go, Tink.”
“Then you and Ned are my Lost Boys.”
“Of course.” Peter twirled you one more time.
“Alright. I have a free period so I’m going back to Neverland, would ask if you wanna come but heard you got detention?” You smirked while Peter rolled his eyes at you.
You gave Ned a peck on the cheek and the Peter.
“See you tomorrow, Ned, Peter Parker.”
(Part 24)...
#steve rogers x teen!reader#steve rogers x reader#peter parker x black!reader#peter parker x reader#avengers x teen!reader#avengers fic#marvel fic
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Please feel free to ignore this, if you don't want to speak on the topic anymore. :)
I read a translation and explanation of someone (unfortunately I lost the post) who spoke about the Ohm issue and from what I remember I thought the topic was brought up to the school and parents, there were apologies and consequences for Ohm for doing what he did. Of course, the saying boys will be boys is shitty but I think it's difficult to blame someone for doing stupid things almost 10 years ago. Most people will look back on their past and have done something they regret and I think it's unfair to make him out to be the devil just because he is a person in the public eye.
Sorry for the word vomit, I just read a lot of hurtful and hateful words towards Ohm recently and I wonder if I apologise for him too much or if feeling sorry for him is okay too. :(
Totally agree with you. The over emotional involvement should get toned back because once it is discovered that they are actually bad people the fans will either be so troubled or being forgiving when it's not their place to forgive.
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I put these asks together because I want to close this topic after this but still wanted to share your messages.
@ anon 1 you’re totally free to forgive whoever you want so it’s absolutely fine if you do!!
Cancel culture is intense but also kinda temporary. the internet gets heated up over something and a few weeks later everything is back to normal. it happens all the time and I’ve seen tons of people who share your opinion that these actors shouldn’t be held accountable for something they did or said 10 years ago and I agree to some extent but it depends on the incident. if someone commented “no homo” on a picture once when they were 13 then that’s no reason to cancel someone in 2023. But in Ohm’s case, what he did is problematic enough for me to remove him from my radar lol. And not just what he did but also the way he reacted to it in his apology, completely missing the point and proving that he has no understanding of how what he did was wrong, not to mention not even apologizing to the victims. Regardless of if and how he got punished back in the day.
I guess forgiving is easier than cancelling but in my opinion forgiving culture transmits the message that these people can do whatever they want as long as they post some form of an apology because their fans will forgive them no matter what. Has any (bl) celebrity ever gotten cancelled for real to the point where they lose their platform, followers and get fired from their company? no. and that will never happen even though some people deserve it. Which is probably why I’m a bit more resentful when it comes to these things. I’m not saying Ohm should be fired and banned from all social media but... you get my point.
As I said it’s up to each individual how to react to these things - there’s no cancellation guidelines lol so it’s totally fine if you feel sorry for him. It’s also harder when there’s an emotional attachment so I get it. But like anon 2 said, it’s a good idea to tone that down (if possible lol) to avoid possible disappointments.
xxx
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K-Pop Group TOMORROW X TOGETHER Discover How Well They Know Each Other: 'We Know as Much as There Is to Know'
Yeonjun, Soobin, Beomgyu, Taehyun, and HueningKai learn who has the best style, who can sing the highest note and who would survive a zombie apocalypse in this latest round of PEOPLE's K-Pop Quiz
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TOMORROW X TOGETHER debuted in 2019 and have already found worldwide success with hits like "Crown" and "Blue Hour," and their latest EP Minisode 2: Thursday's Child has taken the charts by storm in numerous countries.
Now the bond of members Yeonjun, Soobin, Beomgyu, Taehyun and HueningKai is put to the test in this latest round of PEOPLE's K-Pop Quiz. While Soobin exclaims that "we know as much as there is to know," we check to see if they all agree when it comes to who is the most fashionable, who can sing the highest note and who would win in a dance-off.
First, the guys have to figure out what celebrity Taehyun would be starstruck over. Taehyun jokes that he and Justin Bieber are "already buddies," shutting down his bandmates' first guess. Meanwhile, HueningKai believes the answer is himself. "Aren't you often surprised by me," he asks, to which Taehyun jokingly agrees. The real answer: a toss-up between The Kid LAROI and the founder of their label Big Hit Music, Bang Si-hyuk.
When it comes to Beomgyu's favorite on-stage outfit, Soobin believes "there are too many," HueningKai guesses bomber jackets and Yeonjun thinks it's the outfit from their "I Know I Love You" video. But Beomgyu is quick to shut that down, as well as his look from the "Drama" video. The correct choice: his ensemble from the "LOSER=LOVER" music video.
As for Yeonjun's sleeping habits, the members point out that it "changes every day" depending on their schedule, and struggle coming to any sort of a consensus. After hearing a different response from each of the guys, he settles on 11 a.m., which HueningKai correctly guessed, calling it "a relaxed morning."
One thing they do quickly get right is figuring out which animal HueningKai would be if he could choose. The guys guess penguin and unicorn, both of which he declares as "great animals," but penguin ultimately wins. HueningKai clarifies that he does like unicorns, but as Soobin points out, he "does resemble a penguin."
The TXT performers initially believe Soobin's favorite fictional character is Wanda Maximoff from the Marvel Cinematic Universe before changing their decision to Hermione from Harry Potter, which ends up being the correct answer. "She had my heart when I was young," Soobin admits, despite saying he does still like Wanda a lot.
Picking out Taehyun's ideal superpower is no easy feat, with Beomgyu guessing teleporting, HueningKai leaning towards mind-reading and Yeonjun thinking it would just be "sheer power." He ultimately goes with teleportation because "it's practical," and as HueningKai points out, he already has strength. "Then I'd be able to visit the U.S. within a day," Taehyun explains, with HueningKai noting that they would be able to get American snacks whenever they wanted, like Beomgyu's favorite: Hot Cheetos.
Now for the most important question of all: would Yeonjun or Soobin win in a dance-off? The general consensus is Yeonjun, and while Beomgyu feels "sad for Soobin" because "he gets no votes," he doesn't change his mind. The pair then participate in a battle to prove if the guys are right, which leads HueningKai to confess "they were both great so they both win."
In the lightning round, Yeonjun gets the most votes for being the most likely to survive a zombie apocalypse. Soobin says "he'd survive with his brain" and "would beat the zombies up because he's good, he's a good fighter, while HueningKai agrees Yeonjun "would be the leader type," who "always survives long."
It's decided that Beomgyu is the best at keeping secrets, and he add that "if you have something you can't really say or feel uncomfortable about, message me, contact me, and I'll take some time out." However, he later admits that "it's not so much that I'm keeping secrets, it's more that I forget them."
Meanwhile, HueningKai is declared the most fashionable, although they admit their styling team is "saying no way" off camera. Yeonjun says he does "respect HueningKai's dedication to one specific style" and that "he's a professional when it comes to hoodies." HueningKai agrees, admitting he has "various colors, zip-ups, short sleeves... I love hoodies."
And as for who can sing the highest note, the guys run their vocal scales to see who comes out on top. The member closest to breaking glass with their voice: Soobin.
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Frozen
“Take a moment to breath, I already promised you.”
“It’s too soon for you to go back. I don’t want you to get hurt again.”
“Come on, he only got lucky. One in ten zillionth of a shot.”
“It’s still a chance. You were in the hospital how long?”
He didn’t answer knowing her point. It was far too long, but he loved his job. He made great money. What more could he ask for?
“Well I got hurt, then I got healed. I’ll be fine babe. I gotta go. Can I get a kiss for good luck?” He opened his arms and hunched down slightly to meet her height. Fully intending to pick her up in his arms.
But she didn’t move, she only crossed her arms. Her lips were pushed tightly together. A moment later, her arms crossed. He got the message and sighed. “Ok. I love you. See you soon.” With that he turned away and headed to join the games.
Though she was furious with his decision, she still knew it was his decision. He was hurt. And she was afraid. Her livelihood depended on him. And while she worked on her own, she was still struggling to pay off her debts. She payed her own way, but he let her live with him, eat with him, sometimes bathe with him. She wouldn’t have the money to take care of herself properly. Not yet anyway.
She still chose to watch the match. There was a huge ceremony welcoming him back. He should have been excited, but his smile wasn’t one of joy. It was forced one. She sighed. ‘Maybe I ruined this for him. I am probably overthinking this.’ Though past experience from others trying to join their ranks told her otherwise. Death was externally real in this game. His injury proving the fault in the system.
But there she sat, watching and praying all went well. She was willing to apologize. She was pushing her fears on him, perhaps she could get him to understand. She smiled and decided to do something good for him. She would bake him a cake as a celebration of his first game back. Win or lose, he still loved what he did.
She kept the television on, just loud enough to hear from the kitchen. But at time she would he working with her mixer and her tools. Baking was great way to pass the time, and he loved her cakes. She chose marble with a peanut butter frosting. It wasn’t easy, but she found herself lost in the process. It was relaxing her nerves and she even had enough mix left over to make a couple cupcakes.
She was beginning to frost the cakes, after leaving them to cool, when she heard her phone ringing. She rushed to pick it up, jumping in the couch and landing with a soft thud. She answered it, sitting up and looking towards the television. Her mouth felt agape and she lost all feeling. Her phone fell from her hand as tears slid down her cheeks.
On the screen a new story, “…died from a fatal shot at the estates today after being rushed to the hospital. Within the final ring, there was an outage that was announced to late. Both teams substantial injuries. But with A’jay Che’s assistance, the other legends are now stable.”
She eventually snapped from her trance. Tears still flowing. She picked up her phone hearing A’jays voice, pleading with her to come to the hospital. She bit her lip, it was quivering. Her throat was tight. All that came out was a whimper. She hang up on A’jay.
Ignoring all calls, she was doubled over, wailing. She knew it. There was a feeling in her gut. She should have blocked him. She should have done something. She sat there, sobbing until she couldn’t anymore. In that moment, she felt numb. What would she do now? How could she move forward? She didn’t know. All she felt, was frozen.
#apex legends fiction#apex legends#apex legends octane#apex legends mirage#apex legends crypto#octane#mirage#crypto#caustic#apex legends caustic#fuse#apex legends fuse#Newcastle#apex legends Newcastle#pathfinder#revenant#apex legends pathfinder#apex legends revenant#seer#apex legends deer#x reader#apex legends x reader
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#personal
I've been a little more happy since they fixed the internet. It's been kind of one thing after another lately in this neighborhood. You can tell people want to be part of the grief like it's a sitcom because they always need to be seen when you are addressing a problem. They do film Chicago P.D. right in front of my house. They use our steps as a crew seating. You can barely use the front entrance when that happens. I've often tried to place the Frankenstein attitude together of Hollywood aloofness with Chicago grease. It's like a hotdog filled with ketchup. Out of place and asking to be criticized. But the slow, coked out invasion of Trumpian trickery is more rooted in army basic training hazing than a reality show boot camp. Nobody can stand that you do your own thing in this city even after excommunicating you in a such a vile, cavalier way. I'm aware shit jumped the shark a long time ago. It's understanding historically just how big the shark tank is you are trapped in and why. People don't like me. This I know. I personally don't really care all that much except when that crosses the line into my civil and human rights as a citizen of the United States of America. There's not much you can do or prove to stop it. People are bullies out here for mostly property and money. Unlike a pension which you work for, most of that property and money gets passed down from generation to generation. Some of the people bullying me in this neighborhood did not live here five years ago. And sometimes, old bullies move out and new bullies move in. But what doesn't go away is the history. When everybody thinks it's your thing to be communicated to subliminally, you start to realize nobody actually talks at all. They glare. Or loom. They make it a point to be seen so that you stop to make the effort to ask them what they're all about. Mostly because they are set in their ways and can't improvise or step out of the first person enough to see they aren't the main character. I've been living the point in which it goes too far in such a horrific way. Trying to write or journal to make sense of it just invigorates people even more. I go to wait for a package and someone has to been seen carrying the diary of Anne Frank. It's not the first time or a stretch of the imagination that people are trying to send a message of sorts. But I'm a writer and most importantly a reader of books. So really flashing one at me doesn't have the same effect as you reading it and understanding the context of what you are implying. The fact that people think there's some logic into what they're projecting at me is the sign of the times. People are crazier than me and it shows. Which gives me a little hope that I'm not abnormal for staying out of it all after all this time.
Personally the time I've had to focus on people I care about has been worth more than the aggravation of dealing with public opinion. I've been dealing with public opinion in this city my whole life. I spent twenty years at an art school which was the hive mind for all this discourse about justice and race. And in the end I got booted out of it in such a vicious way that I wonder if the real message was a cry for help. America isn't in very good shape. It's isolationist attitude and nostalgic longing for politics that were valid over fifty years ago is scary. People are quick to celebrate freedom but not without proclaiming a religious order to stifle it. You could wave your circumcised dick out for all to see and that still wouldn't prove to people you were baptized. My fear of religion, jobs, and society in America is pretty clear. Nobody accepts me at face value for who I am unless they have the right to roast or judge me in the eyes of their god. And I've seen so many pseudo famous people participate in this roast culture over the years. It's almost like a byproduct of the drugs. One guy even held a roast for himself on his birthday. Which seems counterintuitive. I think that's just a standup monologue. But one thing is for certain, everyone lives the yolo version of putting lol after every sentence without ever speaking out here in the streets. I've been victim to a lot of pranks, targeting, and mental trauma. It becomes something you deal with less. When they cut the internet, I felt like that was intentional. We have to flush him out of his fox hole. And honestly I just replaced the router and waited patiently for the tech to fix it. But like the Joker, it was obvious to me that people had to be seen to take the credit. To show clearly how they control this neighborhood and financial interests in such a criminally organized way. How I'm supposed to "get the message" that I'm not welcome here. Like The Godfather when he puts the horse head in the bed. All this subliminal flashing is nothing more than that. Intimidation and organized crime. It just looks different because well you know. We're all in this together! Chicago strong! I'm going to make you an offer you can't refuse. No thanks. I'm technically already engaged. It starts to become so comical and full of itself that it's asking to be parodied in such a bland saccharine way. But behind the scenes it's connected in ways that have a real footprint of a monster. More horrific than being restricted on Facebook for posting a Stewart Lee monologue about Osama Bin Laden. I can't go live and I can't advertise. But I can be sold boxes of pretty litter on my doorstep and targeted with audio ads on Tumblr to prove a point. I stood up to the mob and this is all I have to show for it. True love and sandy brown hair.
My real fear is less now than it was before I punked people relentlessly over my red lines. I know these people fucked up in such a catastrophic way. I know I isolated myself in such a heartbreaking way. I turned my back on the past and everything it was connected to. Not even my parents wanted to understand. I was alone in my pain and abandonment. I did this to protect not only myself but people I really deeply care about. If I haven't told that person I love them lately? I love you very much. I just took off writing last week as to not overload you with trauma and garbage. Which I know is ironic because I'm drowning in a swamp of trauma and garbage in a "I told you so" like manner. I'm going to need to get a real job eventually. I've been looking for two years. Nobody wants to acknowledge anything about my life. Not on Facebook or Instagram especially. Social media is total pollution in America. You are lucky if you can burrow yourself down here in a bunch of words famous people won't bother to read. It's not like I'm communicating with people I love with bits of trash, statement t-shirts, or colors other than the ones I'm fiscally invested in. I write. I went to college with an English scholarship all those years ago. I switched to psychology thinking I would never find a career as a writer. Now I just don't have a career. I have a twenty year resume that gets drowned out by whatever people think they have harvested data wise about my life. I don't think there's a real explanation for someone invading my professional LinkedIn implying they know everything about my life and what I went through as a child. It's fucked up to think that went unpunished. I also have to wonder if it's just somebody's way of getting to know me. The problem is that there's only one person on earth right now that gets the pass. She knows it. Everything else is me filtering out day to day what is a scam, what's terrorism, and what's the federal government cosplaying as a CIA interrogation room officer. Nothing is true for me these days. I live in a bubble of disinformation paying the rent and utilities for myself and the unit below. I have no guarantees, no rights and in all honesty, no actual freedom. And people just think it's a laugh. Part of the gag. Something to see. Look at this freak who thinks he can be more than what we limited him to be. Mostly because we're afraid of how inferior we are to his effortless banter. I put a lot of effort into loving you. It used to wear me out. But now I just wear it well. After all the comments and hate about what people hallucinate me to be I know one thing. I'm better than all of this. And I've just wanted to share that with you because you inspired me to be something more. I'm inspired to play some smash brothers today. Maybe I'll do a hand video. I know they're called finger creepers. Do you really want me going on record in these dangerous times that I'm doing finger creeper videos alone in my apartment? They've already been in here to fix the cable. I'm not sure they're going to find much more than my amiibos and some Costco branded Kombucha. This situation isn't right for me in the long term. I think we all understand that by now. But for the short term, love is love and don't be afraid to share it. Or keep it to yourself when people threaten you for it. <3 Tim
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A Nice Christmas
Thanks to @gayhistorynerd for the prompt, see here (I kind of deviated from it a little maybe a lot but the story still stemmed from this prompt)
Pairing: Wilhelm × Simon
Summary: Wilhelm may have denied being in the sex tape, but that doesn't mean that the world has forgotten. The Christmas break proves to be difficult for both Simon and Wilhelm, one suffering from ongoing harassment and the other feeling completely isolated, and they find that they can't help but be drawn back to each other.
Word Count: 4.5k
A/N: This took me so long to write because I got writer's block right after I started it. This doesn't have a super happy ending because I wanted to try and keep it pretty realistic, but it is pretty sweet and wholesome.
Taglist: @probablyprocrastinatingrightnow @rika90 @angelwilhelm
Wilhelm had never felt more alone than he did being home for Christmas break. He spent as much time as was physically possible holed up in his bedroom, not wanting to see or talk to anyone, especially not his mother. He hadn’t turned his phone on for three days, he had bitten his nails down to the nailbeds and he hardly had any appetite. The ache in his chest was constant and unyielding.
He lay in the dark most of the time, his curtains closed throughout the day and only sometimes opened at night to let the moonlight in. Besides that, he didn’t have much idea of how time was passing.
He did know that it was Christmas eve though. And it must be the morning because nobody had come to drag him out of his bedroom to join the celebrations. A cursory peek around the curtain confirmed that, as Wilhelm saw that the sun hadn’t even fully risen yet.
A deep breath settled the stone in his stomach, and he reached for his phone with a shaky hand.
When the device turned on it immediately started going crazy with notifications, and Wilhelm felt his heart rate increase with every buzz.
5 messages from August
Ignore.
10 messages from Mamma
Ignore.
2 missed calls from Felice
Wilhelm paused in swiping away the notifications. Felice had called him twice and sent him three messages. He clicked on the message notification, sitting back against the wall and holding in a breath without realising it.
Felice: Hey Wille, how are you feeling being home?
Felice: I just wanted to check in but I can’t get a hold of you, I hope you’re doing alright
Felice: You probably don’t want to talk but you can call or text me whenever you do
Wilhelm sighed. Of all the people that he thought that he could depend on, Felice was the only one that he still had. He swallowed the lump in his throat and called her back.
It rang for a while before she answered, and he’d almost decided to hang up the call when it stopped ringing.
“Wille, good morning.” Felice greeted, cheerful but clearly tired. “Merry Christmas.”
“Yeah, merry Christmas Felice.” Wilhelm replied feebly. His voice was hoarse from disuse.
“Are you alright? Do you want to talk about something?”
“Uhm, I- I don’t know, I just... I don’t know.” He stuttered, wrapping his free arm around himself.
“Okay, well, what are your plans for today?”
“I’m not sure, I haven’t really been talking to anyone. What, uh, what are your plans?”
“Oh, you know, just the usual. We’ll watch Kalle Anka's Jul and play some games before dinner, then we’ll open presents.” She explained. The tinny sound of her voice through the phone was actually quite calming.
“What about for the rest of the break?”
“Um, I’m going to New York to see Maddie for New Year, so that’ll be fun. And I’m going back to Bjärstad on Boxing Day to see Sara. I’m gonna stay there just for one night.”
“So you’ve been talking to Sara a lot then?” Wilhelm questioned, moving to bite at his almost non-existent nails.
“Yeah, of course.”
“Has she said anything about Simon? Do you know if he’s alright?” His words came out more rushed than he had intended. Clearly, he was more eager for some sort of information on Simon than he had thought.
“Um, she hasn’t said much but I think he’s pretty okay.” Felice replied, but it was followed by a small sigh that let Wilhelm know that there was more to the story. “Sara says that things have mostly gone back to normal, but Simon goes out a lot less and she’s had to make her Instagram private. I think they’ve had a few people show up at their house.”
Wilhelm swallowed hard, a feeling of guilt crawling under his skin. Simon’s Instagram account had been private ever since the video had been leaked, so it seemed that now people had found Sara’s too. They had attention on them that they had never signed up for, and Wilhelm knew that it was his fault and he felt terrible for that.
“Okay.” He replied shakily. There was a short silence before Felice spoke again.
“How are you, Wilhelm? Really?” She asked.
“Lonely.” He answered. “Listen, I have to go. I need to take a shower before someone comes demanding that I take part in the Christmas celebrations.”
“Alright well, call me back whenever, okay?”
“Yeah, okay. Bye, Felice.”
“Bye, Wille. Merry Christmas.”
“Merry Christmas.”
Wilhelm ran a hand over his face, letting out a groan of frustration and sadness. Why couldn’t he just be a normal kid?
He stared down at his phone in his lap, gnawing at the nail of his right thumb in contemplation. With a shaking breath and trembling fingers, he picked it back up, opened his conversation with Simon and typed a short message. He dropped his phone in mild panic as soon as he hit send, and rubbed his hand over his chest as he took a deep, steadying breath.
+ + +
“Simon, wake up. Rosh and Ayub will be here soon.” Sara’s voice stirred Simon from his sleep and he rolled over to look at her. She was already dressed.
“What time is it?” He asked with a yawn.
“Nine o’clock. Get up and come help with breakfast.”
“Yeah, yeah. I’m getting up.”
Sara rolled her eyes and left the room, and Simon reached out to his bedside table blindly until his hand landed on his phone. He squinted at the screen as he sat up, faltering when he saw the notification on the screen.
Wilhelm: Merry Christmas Simon
He felt his heart race as he stared at the screen, only snapping out of it when he heard Sara shouting at him from downstairs. He blinked, dropped his phone and set about getting dressed.
Every Christmas eve since they were ten, Simon, Sara, Rosh and Ayub would have breakfast together and then go for a long walk. It was tradition for them at this point, but Simon found himself unable to feel excited for it this year. It was all well and good to pretend like life was going on as normal, but it was hard not to feel uncomfortable when people stared at him everywhere he went.
Rosh and Ayub arrived just as he and Sara were finishing up making breakfast, and they exchanged Christmas well-wishes as they sat down to eat.
“You’re being real quiet over there, Simme. You alright?” Ayub asked after a while, and Simon realised that he’d been completely zoned out.
“Sorry, just thinking.”
“About Wilhelm?” Sara questioned. Simon pushed a bite of food into his mouth and shrugged.
“You have to move on, Simon.” Rosh said. “I know you care about him but he’s not worth all the trouble that he comes with.”
“I know. That’s why I ended things.” He replied. “It still sucks though.”
“You’ll get over him eventually.” Sara told him, putting a comforting hand on his for a few seconds before going back to her food. Simon smiled slightly.
He didn’t tell them about the text.
Despite all of that, he was in high spirits when they set out for their walk, happily joking and laughing with his friends, and they made it half an hour before he heard the first comment.
“That’s the guy from the sex tape.” Muttered a girl to her friend as they passed, and Simon felt the smile fall from his face.
“Just ignore them.” Sara told him, wrapping an arm around one of his. He nodded, but it had gotten to him. For the rest of their walk from that point, Simon felt like every person that they passed was looking at him and judging him.
They walked both Rosh and Ayub back to their houses before heading back to theirs just a bit past noon. They had almost gotten home when they were approached by a group of teenagers probably slightly younger than them.
“Are you the guy from that viral sex tape?” One of the boys asked unabashedly, the group coming right up in front of Simon and Sara and blocking their path.
“Uh, I don’t want to talk about that.” Simon replied stiffly, still trying to be polite.
“Oh my god, it is him!” A girl exclaimed.
“Was it actually the crown prince in the video?” Another chimed. Simon felt lightheaded.
“He already said that it wasn’t.” He deflected, trying to sidestep the group.
“Yeah, but there’s a lot of people that don’t actually believe him.” The girl laughed; actually laughed, as if this hadn’t been an earth shattering event for Simon.
“If it wasn’t Prince Wilhelm then who was it in the video?” A boy asked, and that was when Simon spotted the phone filming him and his stomach dropped.
“I’m not discussing my sex life with a bunch of strangers.” He scoffed in disbelief, shouldering his way past the group with Sara close behind him. “Please leave me alone.”
“You could just tell us if it was actually the prince or not.” One of them pressed, the group now following after Simon. “If it wasn’t him then you don’t have anything to hide.”
“Oh my god, did the royal family pay you off? Did they make you sign an NDA!?”
“Were you, like, boyfriends? Or was it just a hookup?”
Simon kept walking, keeping his head down and not answering any of the questions being hurled at him. He could sense that Sara was just as tense beside him. The group followed them for a full block before Simon finally lost his cool and came to a dead stop, turning to face them.
“I’m not going to answer your questions. The fact that you’re following me is not going to make me answer your questions. I’ve had my privacy majorly invaded once already and now you’re invading it again. I’m trying to enjoy Christmas with my sister and you’re chasing me with a camera, I’m sick of people harassing me.” He fumed, making sure to meet the eye of every one of them at some point. “Whatever you choose to believe is not my problem. It doesn’t matter whether you think that the crown prince is telling the truth or you choose to make up some type of theory, I deserve my privacy.”
He didn’t wait for any type of response before he turned around and walked away, thankful to find that they weren’t going to follow him anymore.
“You handled that well.” Sara said quietly once they had turned the next corner. Simon didn’t reply.
When they got home, he went straight upstairs without a word. He slammed his bedroom door shut and buried his face in his pillow, unable to hold the tears back any longer.
By that same evening, the video was viral.
+ + +
I bet that girl was right and the royal family made him sign an NDA
If he didn’t want people to think it was the prince he would have just said that it wasn’t so either the prince was lying or this guy is seeking attention
He’s literally a kid why can’t people just leave him alone??
I don’t care if it was the prince in the tape or not, this guy is hot
The way he said that people are making up theories makes me think that it actually wasn’t the prince in the video
I feel bad for this guy, getting followed around like that must suck
Wilhelm scrolled through the captions and comments on the seemingly endless posts of the video of Simon, feeling like somebody had a vice grip on his heart.
The first time he saw the video had been right after Christmas Eve dinner. He’d had a full blown panic attack and locked himself in the bathroom for half an hour. When he came out, his mother had tried to talk to him about the politics of the situation and he had immediately retreated into his bedroom once again. He missed Erik desperately.
He hadn’t been able to sleep, he'd only gotten about three hours of broken, fitful sleep all night, and now he couldn’t pry himself away from his phone. He knew that it was bad for him, he knew that it was making him feel terrible, but he wanted to know what people were saying.
He had been hesitant to text Simon, especially since he hadn’t received a reply to the merry Christmas text that he had sent in the morning, but in the end he mustered the courage to reach out. He had asked how Simon was doing and apologised for getting him into this situation. He wasn’t surprised when no answer came.
Christmas day was proving to be probably the worst day of Christmas break for Wilhelm. His chest felt like it was bursting open and like it was an empty chasm at the same time. He didn’t eat breakfast or lunch, he didn’t respond to the knocks that came at his door. He felt like he was trapped in a glass box and someone was shaking it.
Wilhelm didn’t know how long he had been scrolling through multiple different social media platforms when his phone buzzed in his hand and an incoming call appeared on the screen. He faltered, sitting up and almost dropping his phone, when he saw that it was Simon. He ran a nervous hand through his hair as he raised the phone to his ear.
“Simon?” He croaked.
“Hi, Wilhelm.” The reply came through the phone, and Wilhelm felt his shoulders relax at the sound of Simon’s voice.
“Hi. H-how are you.” He fumbled, and Simon sighed on the other end.
“I’m okay, I guess. As okay as I can be after... well, you know.”
“Yeah, I know. I’m sorry for putting you in this situation.”
“This wasn’t your fault, Wille.” Simon muttered. “I just wish things were different.”
“Why, um... why did you call?” Wilhelm asked. There was a short stretch of silence that rung in his ears before Simon answered.
“I just wanted to hear your voice, I guess.” He confessed, and Wilhelm couldn’t help the soft smile that pulled at his lips. “Honestly, I was kind of surprised that you didn’t delete my number or something.”
“Why would I have done that?”
“I don’t know, I guess I just thought that you weren’t supposed to have any ties with me since you said that it wasn’t you in the video.” Wilhelm winced at that.
“It's not like my contacts list is available to the public.” He replied, trying to keep his tone light. “I’m not gonna let that kind of thing get in my head again.”
“Is your mum mad?” Simon asked, and now it was Wilhelm’s turn to sigh.
“I’m not sure, I kind of shut myself in my room so that I wouldn’t have to deal with her.” He answered tiredly. “How is your family?”
“Uh, shaken. Sara’s off in her own world with her sketchbooks and mamá can’t go for more than an hour without checking on us both, but we’re handling it.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologise.”
There was a silence again. Wilhelm ran his hand across his leg, back and forth in a soothing motion, not sure what he should say but not wanting the conversation to finish. In the end, Simon spoke first.
“Did you mean it, what you said before you left for the break?” He asked softly.
“Yeah, I did.” Wilhelm answered without hesitation. “I know it wasn’t a good time to say it, and you probably didn’t want to hear it, but I just had to say it out loud. At least once.”
Silence again. Wilhelm heard Simon sigh, and pursed his lips nervously.
“I miss you.” Simon said.
“I miss you too.” Wilhelm replied with a nervous yet relieved chuckle. “I miss you a lot.”
Another pause.
“Where do we go from here, Wille?” Simon whispered.
“I don’t know.” Wilhelm mumbled. “But I... I want to fix this. Or at least just try to fix it. You don’t deserve to be harassed like this, and it’s my fault and I feel terrible.”
“It’s not your fault.” Simon reassured with a sigh. “It was everything else. We still didn’t do anything wrong, and that includes you.”
“No, I did. I promised we would be in this together and I broke that promise.”
“I understand why you did it. And I’m not mad at you. Honestly, having thought about it, you probably made the best decision for my sake too. I mean, I’m getting harassed enough as it is already. I can’t imagine what it would be like if you had told the truth.”
“I’m still sorry anyway.” Wilhelm said softly, and Simon chuckled. “So, um, Felice told me she was visiting Bjärstad tomorrow.”
“Yeah, her and Sara have gotten close. It’s nice, you know, that Sara’s made friends. And Felice is cool.”
“Yeah, she’s great.”
There was silence again, and Wilhelm bit at his nails thinking that Simon was done with the conversation.
“Are you alright, Wille?” Simon asked after a while. “I know this is your first Christmas without Erik, and I guess things with your mum might be a little... well, I just hope you’re okay.”
Wilhelm swallowed. He could lie, pretend he was fine and wave away Simon’s concerns, but he knew the lie probably wouldn’t hold up. Or he could tell the truth and admit how painfully lonely he was, how much he hated being home because the palace felt empty without Erik and how much he longed to be with Simon with every fibre of his being.
“I’m coping.” He sighed, settling for a middle ground of vagueness. “It’s lonely here. The ceilings feel too high.”
“Have you had stuff to do?”
“No, not really. I haven’t really been in the mood for Christmas, but I guess none of us are particularly festive this year anyway.”
“Would you - I mean, if you would even be allowed to, but maybe if you could – would you want to come down here for a day?” Simon asked, and Wilhelm could just picture him fidgeting nervously as he stumbled over his words. The image brought a smile to his face.
“Yeah, I’d like that.” He answered softly. “I’ll try and convince my parents.”
+ + +
Going to Simon’s house had been an absolute no go with his parents. “Just too risky” his mother had said. However, with enough persistence, he managed to wear them down to a compromise.
That was how he ended up in a car on his way back to Hillerska the day after Boxing Day. While Simon’s house had been absolutely off the table, it would be easy enough to get back to Hillerska without being seen. The only people who were there during the break were security and the people who came to take care of the horses.
He had been worried at first that the inconvenience of it would make Simon not want to bother, but when he texted to ask if it was okay he had been met with a quick agreement.
A security guard unlocked the door for him when they arrived, sworn to secrecy of course, and he headed up to his room to wait. He didn’t realise he was biting his nails until there was a knock at the door and he was knocked out of his anxious thoughts.
The door opened slowly, and Wilhelm felt like all of the air was knocked out of his body when he saw Simon step inside, dressed in his beloved purple hoodie under the coat that he took off and draped over the back of a chair that was within reach. The door clicked shut behind him, and silence hung in the air.
“Hey.” Simon greeted finally, and Wilhelm took a deep breath as if he was just remembering how to breathe at all.
“Hey.” He echoed. “How are you?”
“Better.” Simon nodded. “Did you get into a fight with your parents?”
“Yeah, kinda.” Wilhelm muttered. “It’s fine though.”
Simon crossed the room and took a seat beside Wilhelm on the edge of the bed, a good few inches of space between them. It felt like miles.
“You look tired.” Simon commented.
“I’ve been having a hard time sleeping.” Wilhelm replied weakly, eyes downcast, fidgeting with his hands. “I get that way sometimes. It’s fine.”
“Is it?”
He looked over to find Simon watching him, and he practically crumbled under his gaze. He took a very unsteady breath and shook his head.
“No, it sucks.” He mumbled. His hand drifted back up to his mouth and he gnawed on the nail of his thumb nervously.
“Wille, you’re bleeding.” Simon said, gently grabbing his wrist and pulling his hand away from his mouth. Wilhelm looked down at his thumb and saw a bit of blood pooling in the side of the nailbed, becoming aware of the taste of it on his tongue.
“Oh, I didn’t notice.”
“How much have you been biting your nails?” Simon questioned, pulling Wilhelm’s hand towards him to get a look at them. Every nail was jagged and uneven, bitten down to stubs. The skin around them had been bitten at too.
“I don’t know, I do it without realising.” Wilhelm shrugged. “Probably a lot.” He resisted the urge to curl his fingers around Simon’s hand and blinked back the tears that threatened to fall.
“You shouldn’t have to bottle everything in, you’re destroying yourself.” Simon murmured.
“I don’t have anyone to talk to.” Wilhelm’s voice broke halfway through his sentence, a single tear managing to fight its way from his eye. “I used to be able to talk to Erik about at least some of it but now he’s gone and I don’t have anyone, and sometimes it feels like the ground is falling out from under me and I just don’t know what to do.”
He didn’t notice that he was hyperventilating until Simon pulled him into his arms. Wilhelm’s chest was tight, rising and falling rapidly against Simon’s body. Simon's arms were wrapped around him tightly, and Wilhelm was suddenly overwhelmed with how much he had been craving a hug as his hands grasped at the back of Simon’s hoodie and he hid his face in the crook of Simon’s neck.
Wilhelm had always been told not to cry. Ever since he was a child, whenever he began to cry he was told to stop. The seed had planted itself in him when he was very young, but the fear of letting himself cry didn’t truly grow until he once saw an article in a tabloid. He was barely eleven and he had fallen and hurt himself at an event. He had hardly cried, just a few tears and red cheeks, but the tabloid had had plenty to say about it. He hadn’t let himself properly cry since, except for when Erik died. Even then, he had waited until he was completely alone before he let his weakness show. But now, with Simon, he felt an overwhelming need to let his tears fall.
“I’m so sorry.” He whispered into Simon’s shoulder. He could feel the tears coming out of his eyes but they weren’t falling down his face, instead absorbing into the fabric of Simon’s hoodie.
“It’s okay.” Simon soothed, a hand moving up to stroke over the Wilhelm’s hair.
“I never wanted any of this. I never wanted to be a prince.”
“I know.”
“I just wanted to feel normal. Just for once.” Wilhelm said through his tears. “You made me feel normal.”
Simon furrowed his eyebrows, sympathetic. He loosened his hold on Wilhelm and leaned back, sliding the hand that was on the back of Wilhelm’s head forward to rest against his cheek.
“You made me feel normal too.” He replied softly. “At school I was a social outcast because I’m not rich, and at home I have to take care of my mom and Sara. When I was with you, I didn’t feel like I had to take care of anyone or watch where I was stepping. Well, except that one night.” Wilhelm huffed a slight laugh at the comment, lifting a hand to wipe the tears off of his cheeks. “I’ve never seen you cry before.” Simon commented.
“I’m not supposed to.” Wilhelm replied with an awkward chuckle, his head tipping forward in embarrassment. Simon sighed through his nose and lightly touched his forehead to Wilhelm’s.
“You have to cry sometimes, Wille. Everyone cries.”
“I’m not supposed to be everyone.”
“Okay, but sometimes you need to stop worrying about what you’re supposed to be.” Simon told him. “I know you know that.”
Wilhelm took a deep breath. This close to Simon’s face, he could feel his breathing too. He wanted to kiss him, but he didn’t know if that would be okay. He nodded slightly, covering Simon’s hand on his cheek with his own.
“Yeah.” He breathed.
When Simon leaned forward and connected their lips Wilhelm responded automatically, though it took his brain a few seconds to catch up. Once his brain did catch up, his hand took hold of the back of Simon’s neck and pulled him impossibly closer, holding onto this moment like it was his last. Maybe it would be the last time he got to kiss Simon; he couldn’t know. He hoped it wouldn’t be.
“Thanks for coming to see me.” Simon said when they broke apart.
“Thanks for wanting to see me at all.” Wilhelm replied. “I really missed you.”
Simon hummed, a faint smile playing at his lips. He watched Wilhelm for a few moments before kicking off his shoes.
“Come here.” He said, shuffling over the bed towards the wall. Wilhelm followed suit and allowed himself to be guided down to a lying position, Simon’s chest against his back and arm around his waist. “You need to sleep.”
“It’s the middle of the day.” Wilhelm protested, weak as the protest may have been.
“People have naps all the time, and you know that you need it.” Simon said firmly, adjusting the pillow under his head with his free arm and finding Wilhelm's hand to hold in the other. “It doesn’t have to be for long, okay?”
“Okay.” Wilhelm nodded, feeling suddenly very relaxed. He took a deep breath settling into the comfort and warmth of Simon’s body around his as his eyes fell shut. “This is nice.” He mumbled after a while.
“Yeah.” Simon agreed softly. “Go to sleep, Wille.”
It wasn’t long until he felt Wilhelm’s breathing change, signifying that he had fallen asleep. He smiled, fondly but with an edge of sadness to it, and pressed a light kiss to Wilhelm’s shoulder before closing his own eyes. They would deal with the rest of the world when they woke up.
#young royals#young royals netflix#wilmon#wilhelm x simon#simon x wilhelm#young royals fanfic#young royals fic#simon young royals#simon eriksson#wilhelm young royals#wilmon fanfic#felice young royals
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