#what if they batfam movie

[horsechestnut]

There are so many Dick, Bruce, or Tim kills the Joker fics on AO3, meanwhile Barbara was the one talking about how The Joker should be the exception to the No Kill Rule years before Red Hood Jason even existed.

#joker: last laugh #barbara gordon #oracle #batgirl i #let. barbara. kill. the. joker. #she deserves it #also that's basically exactly what jason says in the red hood movie #(i have not read the comic yet I'm still in 2001) #batfam #batfamily #i read comics #look i'm not saying dick shouldn't be allowed to kill the joker #but right now on ao3 there are more fics where D*NNY PH*NTOM kills the joker #then fics where Barbara does #we should fix that

[spoilers-ahead]

okay!! now that it’s not 2am for me, i’m going to post my selkie!jason todd hc’s straight up au apparently! 

(uh. this was supposed to just be a list of hc’s but i got slightly,,,, carried away)

his selkie skin looks like an oversized red hoodie in his human form, and is just warm enough to help him survive new england winters.

when the summer heat becomes unbearable, he slings the hoodie around his waist

alternatively, he just coasts it out underwater. perks of living in a coastal city!

willis todd was a selkie. he used to tell jason stories of what it was like to swim through the big, wide ocean. of how freeing it felt. how different it is, from the smoggy, heavy air of gotham --- different, but both theirs, in their own right.

but to be honest, jason doesn’t remember much about the stories he was told, or really, anything about willis --- he had been in and out of blackgate for most of jason’s life, working for two-face to try and make ends meet, before dying. 

what jason mostly remembers, are the warnings. don’t let anybody know you’re a selkie. don’t let anybody find your skin. they will find it, and they will use it to control you. even decades later, jason would still remember those warnings. 

catherine is the one who teaches him how to swim, who helps him trial-and-error his way into putting his skin on, and learn how to make the transition seamless. 

after she dies, jason spends three months as a seal, to just... exist. forget.   

although jason technically lives on the streets, whenever he can;t find food, whenever he can’t find somewhere warm to sleep, whenever just being human becomes too unbearable, he spends the night as a seal. he ends up spending more time in the ocean, than on land.

that’s not to say he’s very good at being a seal --- he barely knows how to swim, has to learn how to fish the hard way. 

when bruce finds jason stealing his car tires, he marvels over how nice jason’s hoodie is, soft and fluffy even after all of jason’s time on the streets, especially given the condition jason is in, ribs showing from malnutrition, and the worn and raggedy shape of the rest of his stuff.

jason is skittish when he goes to live in the manor, even after a few weeks. he always adopts an expression particularly similar to a cornered wild animal around alfred in particular, alfred, who keeps on trying to take his hoodie away, purportedly to wash it.

alfred eventually gives up on trying to force jason to wash it --- he figures that as jason becomes more comfortable living at the manor, he’ll wind up telling them why he’s so protective over that hoodie, and they can work something out then. 

whenever wayne manor overwhelms jason with how big and how decadently expensive all the decor is, jason runs away, run to the ocean. 

jason doesn’t actually end up telling alfred and bruce that he’s a selkie --- bruce just has a ridiculous amount of motion alarms, which are triggered every time jason ran off. he had followed jason the third night, and saw him transform. 

bruce doesn’t tell jason that he knows, assuming that jason kept this a secret because he didn’t fully trust either of them. he would later learn that he was right in this assumption (a rare win for bruce in terms of emotional awareness)

except jason doesn’t fully trust either of them, even after a few months. bruce impulsively decides to do a few things --- a) tell jason about batman and robin and his crime-fighting secret identity, and b) tell jason he already knows about him being a selkie. 

jason is absolutely bamboozled by the fact that bruce knows, and yet hasn’t tried to take his hoodie to control him, or to stop him from playing in the ocean for a few hours. 

in fact, (under alfred’s encouragement) bruce offers to take him to the ocean during the day, so he can get “a proper night’s rest that a growing young boy such as himself would need”

jason remembers what his father told him, to never trust anyone, never let his guard down. but bruce has known about jason being a selkie for so long, and he didn’t take his hoodie or try anything. of course he can trust bruce. 

and when he tries on the robin costume for the first time, it fits perfectly. just like his hoodie, his second skin. it fits just like magic. 

oh, it’s a little loose in some places, the legacy of dick fucking grayson a little heavy sometimes, but he’ll grow into it. he’ll make himself, if he has to. 

also, jason finds the fact that even though he’s a friggin’ selkie, his callsign is a bird (a robin, no less) incredibly ironic and funny 

being a selkie is actually so useful for vigilantehood. the amount of people who talk freely, openly, and loudly about their drug smuggling plans near the ports is quite frankly, ridiculous.

honestly, towards the end of his robin years, jason remains genuinely surprised nobody catches on to him or his tactics yet. bruce is very proud.  

even though jason is safe, has been safe for three years, and trusts bruce with his life, his skin, and everything, old habits are hard to break. so he has his hoodie on when he goes to find sheila. 

and anyways, he wants to see if sheila is a selkie too. he’s taking biology right now, and they’re learning about punnett squares. jason’s never met another selkie before, other than willis who he barely remembers. there’s a possibility that sheila knows something, anything, so he has to try. 

sheila gets a glint in her eyes when jason mentions that he’s a selkie, tells him that while she’s not one herself, she’s familiar with the myth. she has long suspected that willis was a selkie, she tells him, and she’s glad to have confirmation. 

jason positively vibrates with excitement, can’t wait to ask, to pester his mother (mother!) with questions upon questions until. 

until. 

sheila doesn’t do anything after she gives him to the joker. she just smokes and smokes. and she doesn’t tell the joker about his hoodie, despite how it would have been much easier for the joker to destroy him that way. much more painful too.  

small mercies, he supposes, in between hacking coughs that brings blood bubbling up his lips. 

after he dies, his hoodie is ripped and in tatters from the crowbar, with burns along the edges from the bomb. bruce has to carefully peel it off his body. 

when jason was alive, his magic kept the hoodie in perfect condition, always. even when the rest of him was covered head-to-toe in mud, or dripping sludge from the nasty gotham sewers. 

bruce stares at the same hoodie, blood-soaked and mangled, so incredibly dissonant from how he remembered it on jason, when he was bright, whole, and alive. 

he can’t stand it. the hoodie that was so precious to jason, that was jason, at the core of him, in this state. dirty and ripped and devoid of the magic jason had exuded. 

in a moment of desperation, late at night, bruce asks alfred to teach him how to sew. he doesn’t dare to practice on jason’s beloved hoodie --- instead, he starts with the suits in his closet, grabbing the first one he sees, regardless of price. rips a hole and sews it back together over and over until he perfects his technique. 

and then he washes the fabric gently, using baby fabric cleanser and scrubbing for hours upon hours until the last traces of the deep-set brown stain from jason’s blood washes down the drain.

he painstakingly sews the scraps of fabric back together with a red thread, carefully sourced to match the hoodie to try and make it flow seamlessly like it used to. 

it doesn’t work, not exactly. despite his best efforts, the creases bruce had carefully sewn together are prominent and thick like scars, littering the  soft fabric.

so he gives up. he hangs it over the grandfather clock entrance to the cave in his study. brings it with him every time he visits jason’s grave, because he doesn’t ever want to keep jason’s hoodie away from him, but he also can’t bear for it to get ruined. 

dick visits him. a rare occurrence, these days. 

dick yells at him, as he is wont to do. 

these days, it feels like they spend more time angry at each other than not. dick says that this isn’t right. isn’t fair to anybody, not to alfred, not to himself, definitely not to jason. he rants, jason deserves to be remembered as he was in life, not frozen in death. 

perhaps he is right. bruce is not unaware of the state of violent, cutting stasis he is in, this putrefaction of his life. and he is certainly not unaware of how it is affecting the people around him. dick. alfred. the neighbor’s kid, the one who wants to be robin.   

bruce tries. not for himself, but for tim. for alfred, for dick. even for stephanie brown, who sometimes, when she smirks just right, or says something with just the right twang, he swears he can see jason in her. 

he still can’t bear to put the hoodie away, because jason deserved better than to be forgotten, so he folds it gently and places it in his closet instead. 

he also can’t bear to look at it for very long, so he forces himself to every single day. 

it’s different from the glass case that houses robin’s tattered suit in the cave --- that, is a reminder of how he failed robin. this, this is salt in a constant, stabbing, festering would, reminding him of how he failed his son. 

it was stephanie, that eventually helped him figure out what to do with the hoodie. when she was young, young enough to cry at ripped pants and skinned knees, young enough that her mother hadn’t touched the drugs yet, her mother would dry up her tears, give her a hug and a kiss on the forehead, before patching her pants up. 

what not many people know, is that before crystal brown set her mind on becoming a nurse, she wanted to be an artist, first. and so she grabs her old set of embroidery needles, and stitched little designs. dogs and cats. stars and planets. tools and gadgets. 

bruce doesn’t react, doesn’t even move, even as stephanie finishes her story. she hangs there awkwardly for a second, stares up at jason’s suit, waiting for him to respond, before shuffling towards the exit of the cave. 

thank you, spoiler, bruce manages to croak out. 

ah, yeah, she says, shrugging lightly while slouching in on herself, any time, boss. she walks out, and bruce watches her go from the reflection on the darkened computer. 

that night, he takes out jason’s hoodie, smooths it out, grabs his threads, and stitches. 

he stitches on constellations, argo navis, for jason’s namesake in the greek myths he had loved so much. a tiny seal, playing with beach balls. little books, with quotes on the sides. a robin, big and bold. 

he tries to make it as true to jason as possible, not just in death and in bruce’s memories, but as he was in life.

jason wakes up abruptly.  

he wakes up in a coffin, cold, alone, and with a gaping hole in his chest. getting dipped in the lazarus pit only made it worse, only made him all the more aware of what he was missing, all the more conscious of it. 

he doesn’t bother trying to learn how to swim with two arms and two legs, instead of two fins and a tail. it doesn’t feel the same. it only reminds him of what he’s lost. 

sometimes, on sleepless nights that happen more often than not, he wonders what would have happened if he still had a hoodie, still could swim. 

if he still was robin. 

and he doesn’t have access to the cave anymore, or to the titan’s tower, or the watchtower, and his memory of the past is still patchy and shitty in some places. 

so in a burst of impulsivity fueled by the person he no longer is, he prints out photos of robin’s costume from the internet and recreates it on his own. 

if his skin is gone, then fine. fine! he’s perfectly perfunctorily aware that nothing about this resurrection of his is natural. if he doesn’t think too much about it, he’ll be alright. his hoodie, his skin, that was something he was born with, a birthright that died with him. 

but robin, robin was something that he helped shape. robin was something that he worked for, changed himself for. 

and the makeshift robin suit --- it doesn’t fit him, not anymore. no, it feels wrong, like a child playing with their parent’s suit. or --- he realizes, perhaps more accurately, like an adult realizing they no longer fit in their favorite clothes. 

and --- and --- what was the point of it all? what was the point, of trying to make bruce proud of him, of getting dick’s approval, of trying to futilely save people over and over again from the same gallery of supervillains who keep on escaping from prison?!

and what was the point of carving out a space for himself if the joker was just going to beat him out of it, and if tim drake was going to insert himself in the hole he left behind?

and then the next thing he knows he’s in titan’s tower hitting tim drake over and over again because who let him? who let him take jason’s role as a son, as a brother, as a hero? how dare he?

but when he’s slit tim’s throat and torn the ‘R’ off his chest, jason doesn’t feel any better. the robin suit still doesn’t fit. his hoodie’s still gone. 

he’s starting to think it never will, not again. 

sometimes, when he gets tired enough to let his mind wander, he wonders what happened to his suit. 

he’s pretty sure he died with it, so either the hoodie is with the joker, batman, or... gone entirely. (it’s not like they found willis’ skin after he died. maybe selkie skins just disappear in a cloud of sea foam once they die, or some little mermaid shit like that)

it’s a cold comfort, that nobody can manipulate him now. nobody can control him --- not even batman. 

(bruce had thought about it. when he first had his suspicious regarding who the red hood was, before he knew there was any trace of the son he once had left. he thought about using the hoodie, using jason’s selkie skin to coerce him, at least to stop murdering people, to stop hurting their family.) 

(he would never go that far, in retrospect, or at least, he doesn’t think he could ever. to do that to jason, betray his trust so thoroughly and completely... but it would be a lie to say that he didn’t consider it.)

bruce reflects on this as jason reveals himself, the joker tied up at his feet with a gun pressed to his head, and venom spitting from his son’s mouth.  

but when he lifts the batarang to hit jason’s gun, or wrist, or anything that’ll force him to drop the gun, he realizes that his hands are shaking. 

and when he throws the batarang, he knows a millisecond after he’s let go, that he’s miscalculated the ricochet. 

so when jason escapes that night, bruce knows he’s fucked up. 

jason goes off the maps, completely. bruce doesn’t know where he is, if he’s safe, if he even made it out of the explosion that night. 

it takes weeks. weeks for bruce to track jason down, from meticulously documenting the dropped threads of where the red hood was pulling strings in the gotham underworld behind the scenes, to tracking security cameras with facial recognition. 

once bruce manages find where he’s staying, make sure he’s safe, he knows what he wants to do. and, he knows what he needs to do. 

jason gets a package in the mail, five weeks after his disasterous meeting with batman and the joker. unmarked, unsigned, no return address. 

when jason opens the box gingerly and carefully, he holds on to his skin for the first time in years. and then, and then, and then --- something right slots into place. his fingers brushed gently over the tiny spotted seal he knows he used to look like, the books he remembered ranting to bruce about for hours on end. 

the robin, on the top left, over his heart, big enough to have changed him, yet small enough to not define him. 

it’s not perfect. it doesn’t even fix anything, not entirely. he still fights with bruce most times he sees him, tries to punch dick in the face, steadfastly ignores tim and steph the entire time. 

but it’s something. it’s something, and the next time nightwing, batman, spoiler, and robin fight a gang on the docks, the red hood gives them a helping hand before jumping back into the ocean and swimming away.

fin!

wow this got long

#jason todd #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #batfam #selkie!jason #dick grayson #stephanie brown #tim drake #catherine todd #willis todd #that one selkie!jason au #i swear i will turn this into an actual fic one day #anyways about the using embroidery to fix ripped clothes thing all i can say is WATCH HI MOM #it's SUCH a good movie and i guarantee it will DEVASTATE you in ALL your little mommy issues glory #like you think the batfamily comics/fanfics have an amazing nuanced complicated take on the parent-child dynamic? #this movie will BLOW your fucking SOCKS off. and best part of all: you can watch it WITH said parent #and it won't be as horrible of an experience as showing them encanto/turning red/eeaao! #in fact your parent will probably like the movie too and be reminded of THEIR own mommy issues :D #admittedly it's slightly different from the examples i listed above bc it's more abt what it's like to never reach ur parent's expectation #rather than an exploration of complicated parenting but it's still very relatable and very very good #the best part is you can find it all for free on youtube. also note that i mean the recent chinese movie not the old 70s movie #asteria's fics #i'm never writing a fucking flash fic on TUMBLR of all text editors again #shouldve written this out on a google doc first but i genuinely did not think this would get so long T.T #you can probably tell from the first three (3) bullet points that this was supposed to be a hc list before... it stopped being a hc list #guys i started writing this at 12 PM #IT'S NOW 9 AWOGEJAWOIG #my writing

[thisiswhereikeepdcthings]

Okay here’s my idea for a Batman movie:

Starts out with your typical low light, can barely see what’s happening fight scene between Batman and whatever villain of the day, but one that’s fairly recognizable. Then Batman arrives back at the cave, and immediately gets an alert on the computer. It’s from the Justice League, and oh no there’s some kind of emergency and he has to leave right now to prevent disaster or Hal from doing something stupid.

Bruce sighs, and informs Alfred that he’ll be leaving. Alfred takes this information in stride and asks, “And while you are gone?”

Bruce sighs much more dramatically, and then we cut to him coming through the kitchen door. The camera then shows like ten kids of various ages eating and having an argument about some game or something like that.

Bruce: “I have to go.”

Bruce:

Bruce:

*cricket sounds*

Bruce: “Stephanie is in charge while I’m gone.”

Cue fist pump from Stephanie and much complaining from everyone else who is arguing why they should be in charge. Bruce proceeds to remind each and every one of them what happened last time they were in charge.

The rest of the movie is the batkids. Bruce doesn’t appear again until the last five minutes. Alfred ensures everyone stays alive and relatively unharmed but other than that he leaves them to it. There is much glorious chaos. The movie is an action comedy with several gratuitous explosions.

I’d call it Batman: Legacy.

All the movie posters would be a dark, edgy batman like all the other batman movies. There would be the slightest hint of robin, or maybe even nightwing, but in such a way that you think it’s going to be a cameo sort of thing at the end to set up for another film.

#batman #batfam #batkids #Bruce Wayne #batman movie #what do you mean dc doesn’t stand for disregard canon

[mistergreatbones]

Realistically if the bats were close enough to hangout as civilians they wouldn’t attack each other for fun because no one wants to be down an ally because your argument over KitKats got a little too intense and now they’re in the medbay. Unrealistically however I think Duke does a livestream in what he thinks is an unused room but is actually an used room connected to several other unused rooms that Damian and Cass run through when they (lovingly and purely for play) feel like throwing knives at each other.

They run through the background but before but before Duke notices the chat going crazy they’ve already slid out of frame. No time to come up with an excuse Duke just sighs very deeply and says “this is what happens when you’re bored and have health insurance”

#leo says shit #batfam #he dragged a random 10 year old (Damian) to the movies with him in robin war I think he’d be the streamer of the household #actually I think he’d be more of a YouTuber who goes on live every so often when a trailers just been released #every once in awhile Bruce pops his head in on accident and then goes “son look I’m one of those easer eggs :D" #obviously he’s doing it to sell brucie but Doug ends up doing the same thing later unironically #i was gonna put what social media I think everyone would use but it got too long so I might just make it it’s own post #Duke Thomas #tw knife #tw knives #tw knife mention #tw knives mention

[punkeropercyjackson]

"Jason Todd should adopt Danny Fento-"Jason Todd should adopt GWEN STACY

#-who is actually in need of it!!!her mom died and her dad's a twisted toxic oppressive mess!danny has some of the best parents ever tf #just say you don't know what normal friendshipa are and only care about male characters despite claiming to prioritize all transness and go #and there's no 'parallels' between him and danny while jason and gwen deadass shared a long running comics meme pre-ressurections #comics!gwen is red hood-adjacent with her specific kinds of edge and jason's got the same cringefail loserhood movie!gwen does.be serious #ghostsiblings #jason todd #gwen stacy #batfam #ditf #lost days #utrh #rhato #the outlaws #dead sidekicks force #team dual #the anomalies #itsv #atsv #btsv #spiderman #the spiders within #spidey and his amazing friends #trans 4 trans and autistic 4 autistic found family realness #💌 #comics #summerposting #anti dp #antidpxdc #jaysumm #ghostflower ghostpunk or ghostbyte too if you want

[spacedace]

WAIT I JUST HAD ANOTHER THOUGHT FOR THE DISASTER MEET THE INLAWS DINNER:

okay context: so in this AU, Danny and Dan are the only ones who don't know the batfam secret. Jazz figured it out when they first moved in next door to Jason. Damian told Elle after she trusted him with the truth about being a halfa. Elle didn't tell anyone else since it was a secret Damian trusted her with, while Jazz & Jason assumed that everyone else in the Nightingale family knew and never really brought it up.

It just completely sailed over Dan & Danny's heads. Even though part of the deal the family worked out with the Spirit of Gotham is to help protect her Bats and Birds (that's why Dan ended up in Bludhaven, to help keep Nightwing safe) and they regularly (secretly) follow the batfam around during patrols and fights to help make sure nothing bad happens to them.

Which brings us to the disaster dinner where, after things have almost calmed down from the chaos and embarrassment of Elle and Damian's power point & movie, everyone is actually almost getting along. Turns out, getting horribly roasted by the two gremlins helped break the ice a bit. It's kinda hard for the Bats to hold on to as much of the suspicion for the Nightingales as before when they just watched a supercut of everyone’s most embarrassing moments from the past five years with color commentary from the Chaos Duo.

Which is to say Danny is feeling comfortable enough - with some edging on by Elle - to reveal his conspiracy theory about who Batman is, to Bruce.

Just looks Bruce straight in the eye and with his whole heart and soul asks, "So, like you're for sure Batman's sugar daddy right?" -

Tagging for those who asked: @screamingtofillthevoid @stargirl1331 @mnemovoid @malice-of-the-sunrise @bathildaburp @autumnwulf @revnantdpxdclover @coruscateselene @writer-extraodinaire @idfk-man10 @fluffen-spooky @frostedthroughghost @akikkobara @unadulteratedsoulsweets @phoenixdemonqueen @overlycaffeinatedsuperwholockfan @gin2212 @emotional-otter @lexdamo @dixiwoods @wildbacon @ashleysmshly @that-random-fangirl @satanicrutialspecialist @lazy-bouqet @treepainting @busterkeel @gin2212 @idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit @jaggedheart11 @introvert-even-on-the-internet

#dp x dc #dc x dp #batman #danny phantom #gotham's favorite psychiatrist jazz au #batfam #danny fenton #dan fenton #danielle fenton #dani fenton #jazz fenton #damian wayne #several miles away Clark fully just falls out of the sky laughing and nearly breaks his phone trying to text Diana what he just heard #when everything is revealed Dan argues that there's no way Dick can be Nightwing because Nightwing is taller #Dick realizes he may be a moronsexual after that #Jason: I fully came home wearing my Red Hood gear two months ago you SAW me take my helmet off #Danny: I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST A REALLY GOOD COSPLAY #If Sam & Tucker find out Danny knows they'll never let him live it down #especially not after all the hours of agonizing over his dual crushes on both Red Robin & Tim #Damian was filming the entire interaction for the purpose of it being the opener of their next embarrass the family movie event #He and Elle have decided to make it a tradition out of utterly roasting their collective family #Dan & Danny proceed to then give an impromptu ted talk on all the reasons they think batman is fucking ever rich guy in gotham for money #Jazz contemplates if murdering her brothers or faking going into labor will be the better option to get her out of this hell #Jason is having the time of his life

[voidlesscreator]

Haunted Doll AU.

If anyone has watched that Wizard of Oz movie where it's the prequel this'll make a lot more sense.

Instead of being one of those antique anabelle type dolls that are typically haunted, Danny is possessing a china doll instead- or a porcelain doll, kinda like this

So imagine Danny gets hurt by either the GIW or the Fenton dr duo and flees to the Infinite Realms, only for CW and Frostbite to suggest putting his ghost core in a movable container while his body heals. Normally Ghosts would probably just be able to switch up their body while their core heals and just reform their body after, but since Danny is a halfa his body will still be there but in a comatose state so it needs to stay under watch.

CW suggests a doll to put his core in and when they do, he is able to move and talk since his voice comes from his core and the doll is ball-jointed.

After getting used to the new body, Danny is sent back to Earth to wait for his body to heal fully, and accidentally takes a wrong turn and ends up in Gotham.

Cue one of the batfam finding a walking doll and taking it home after finding out that it's sentient and a ghost healing.

(Probably Damian during a patrol but it could be any of them.)

#dc x dp #danny is a doll #i read multiple posts where Danny moved as a doll without being seen #and just thought what if he could always do that? #boom china doll danny like those things from that one wizard of oz movie #the batfam are gonna be in for a surprise #damian would probably treat Danny like one of his beloved animals that are injured #tim is probably 2 minutes from passing out from either exhaustion or fear #because why is there a walking doll carrying fruits across the kitchentop with alfred?

[cablecar-s]

to love and self loath

Description :

With the death of her lover too much to bear, she makes the decision to run away from her life as Spider Woman, finding solace in the most crime ridden place in the U.S: Gotham City.

Note:

Hello! I'm currently just testing the waters of Tumblr at the moment, so bear with me because I have no idea what I'm doing. Constructive criticism is welcomed, just remember to not be mean >:/ Enjoy the first chapter!!

Prepare For Trouble

"You're Spider-Woman, right?" He looked at her with a knowing yet amused smile on his face, all the while the woman who stood before him could only stare at him with slight bafflement. Eyes wide, lips slightly parted, she blinked at him, beginning to stammer.

"I.. What? How could you..? What kind of crazy.." She let out a small mix of what seemed to be a huff and laughter in trying to play off his not-so-false statement.

Her crush could only give her a look that read all too clearly as 'Really?' which led her to promptly give up, a sigh of defeat leaving her lips.

"I.. Yeah, you got me. I'm.. I'm Spider-Woman." She looked at him with a defeated smile. "How'd you know though? I thought I was pretty secretive!" She raised her hands up in defense, making him laugh.

"Well, with how much you sometimes ditch me last minute every time I hear sirens going off or how you always disappear out of thin air when something big or small happens, it was pretty easy to deduce the reasons why." He chuckled softly.

"You are also talking to the most smartest person in his entire school." He quickly added.

The female vigilante could only slightly scoff at this, looking around, as if someone else could hear the ridiculousness that was coming out from his mouth.

"Really now?" She questioned, almost mockingly.

Slowly, the two teenagers inched closer to one another while continuing to bicker, a teasing smile on both of their faces until finally they were mere inches away from one another.

"I hope you're not waiting for something." The teenaged boy said teasingly, a smile on his lips.

"No, not at all." The girl hummed, smiling back.

With the night air nipping at their skin, the warmth of their breaths could be felt on one another. And as they leaned in for a kiss, the floor beneath them fell in an instant, and they were soon falling down the clock tower.

With her spider suit on, breathing now heavy, adrenaline pumping into her veins, she watched as the boy she loved since high school began falling, watching as her single web was shot down towards him.

It was silent in that moment, everything having gone in slow motion, her web slowly reaching out to him, but was only seconds too late. The web, sticking itself to the man at the last second, his head still hitting the cold, hard floor, killing him in an instant.

The sound of her cries echoed in the now broken clock tower; grief, guilt, and anger consuming her body, until...

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP

In an instant the woman woke up, covered in her sweat, her heart pounding against her chest. Her fight and flight instincts having kicked in, her eyes darted around her new apartment, her brain slowly catching up as to where she was. 

The muffled sound of cars honking from outside her window was heard, the slight musty smell that her apartment had, and the multiple of unpacked boxes laying around in her small bedroom had slowly calmed her down.

Memories from a few days ago came back to her again, making her sigh while simultaneously burying her face into her hands, that night continuing to haunt her time and time again no matter how many times she had tried to forget. 

Finally turning the alarm on her phone off, she got herself out of bed and went to her bathroom to freshen up, her morning not doing so well with that dream of hers. 

Pulling her hair back from her face, the woman left her bathroom and started to continue where she had left off from yesterday with unpacking her stuff. Putting her playlist on shuffle, she began digging through all of the boxes that held her belongings, putting them in their respective places.

The female vigilante was glad to have gotten away from New York, it gave her time to take a break from playing Spider-Woman—and to hopefully heal. Though it's obvious someone from above thought it would be funny that she would be transferred in the most highest crime rated city: Gotham City.

There goes her vacation.

Though Gotham City should be fine without the help of Spider-Woman shouldn't it? They have all the other vigilantes that kept Gotham fairly safe.

From Batman and Robin to Nightwing, Orphan, Spoiler, hell they even have someone to protect Gotham in the morning, which would be Signal. Of course there was also Red Hood, though she still wasn't so sure if he was to be counted since he did run a few drug cartels.

Wasn't really her business though, as long as she didn't have to do any fighting in the mean time of her slight vacation. 

Boy was she wrong.

"I need you to take some photos of our vigilantes." Her new boss ordered.

"I'm sorry?" The woman furrowed her brows, staring at the woman who was busy typing away on her computer.

"You heard me. Pictures. Vigilantes. Stat." Her voice was monotone, yet it had a slight intimidation to it. 

The vacationing vigilante did her best in holding back her frustration, moving her arms a bit to exaggerate her words just a bit. 

"But Gotham is a lot more crime ridden at night. Can't you have one of the men do it? I'm sure they'd be less likely to get mugged unlike me." She couldn't help but huff, nothing but familiar with this attitude this older woman had.

She was very much the same as Jameson back at the Daily Bugle.

It wasn't long until the woman peeled her eyes off from her computer screen to stare at the vigilante with sharp eyes.

"Listen sweetheart, the reason why you were even transferred here was because of the crystal clear pictures you had taken of Spider Woman over back from where you're from." Opening a file cabinet from her desk, she flipped through a few divided folders before pulling one out in particular and opening it up, slightly tossing it in the middle of her desk.

Photos that she had taken slid itself out from its place in the divider, all of them of which were in good quality and all had good angles to them, only because she was quite literally taking pictures of herself in order to even obtain a job as a photojournalist.

"So it's either you take photos as nice as these of our vigilantes or we can throw you back to New York, your choice." Quite literally, Jameson's female doppelganger looked back up at her new transferee before going back to typing.

Letting out a small sigh, a muttered "Yes ma'am" left her lips before leaving her new demon boss' office. She really can't catch a break can she? 

Well it's not like she wasn't a night person in the first place right? Being able to do whatever she wanted during the day, and once the sun had disappeared and the darkness and rain had taken over Gotham was when it was her time to go out and do her job.

The only downside was how incredibly freezing cold it was in Gotham once night had hit. She could stand the cold to some degree, as a New Yorker she was quite used to the cold, but Gotham was a whole other story.

She should probably install thermos into her suit. As much as she didn't want to think about vigilantism, she knew deep down she would end up doing it, only reason she had brought her suit, which was buried in the deepest parts of her closets.

As her uncle had said time and time again: With great power comes great responsibility.

Being way too busy being deep in her thoughts while slightly, not really, looking as to where any of Gotham's vigilantes may be swinging by, the hair's on her body shot up, the familiar feeling of a tingling sensation in the back of her head appearing.

With swiftness, she side stepped a hand that had tried to take hold of the back of her neck. Turning around, she found herself eyeing three men, all having sinister smiles on their faces.

Just what exactly was her luck today?

"Come on boys, don't you think three of you is a bit much for a single woman like me?" She questioned, a nervous chuckle leaving her lips.

Every step back she had taken, they had taken two steps forward. They had glanced amongst each other, snickers leaving their mouths.

"Not with a lady as pretty as you." One of them commented.

Slowly, they had backed her into a closed off alleyway, all three of them laughing once her back had hit the brick wall.

Her eyes darted around, checking every crevice, every shadow, trying to see if any of Gotham's vigilantes will swoop down to rescue her, and save her the trouble of having to take care of these men herself. 

But there was no one, not even the slightest of movements, not a glint of lenses shining in the dim lighting. Welp, looks like she's on her own for tonight. 

"You guys, really don't want to do this." She warned them, but they only laughed more. They always laugh. Who wouldn't though? A helpless woman who you've backed into a corner telling you they're gonna regret what they're gonna do?

Good thing she wasn't just any ordinary woman though.

"We're gonna have so much fun with you pretty lady." One of them cackled.

"Ugh, how gross..." She muttered.

Glancing around one last time, this time, making sure there would be no bystanders to witness as to what was going to happen.

Pulling up the hood to her winter coat, she let out a sigh, raising one of her arms, pointing it towards one of the men.

"You asked for it." 

In the blink of an eye, her webs shot out from her wrist, a long string going straight for the one in the middle, before he was heaved straight towards the woman before making a harsh impact with a trash can lid.

"Ooh, you'll be feeling that tomorrow." She winced.

Grunts of surprise came from the other two men, but no matter how odd it was for webs to shoot out from a woman's hand, they proceeded to run at the female. With ease, she dodged their attempted charged attacks.

Her hands, opposite of the two men, shot out webs and took hold of the back of their heads before she pulled at the connected webs, causing the two men to bash their skulls together.

"You'll definitely feel that tomorrow." She chuckled. 

Taking a few steps back, she hesitated for a moment and stared at them before quickly rearranging the positions of their bodies.

"Just in case..." She muttered. With their backs all facing each others', she bundled them up in her webs, a precaution if they ended up gaining back consciousness before the morning

Dusting off her hands, she let out a satisfied hum before securing her hood once more before quickly jogging off, not wanting to be found at the scene of the crime. That would only cause herself more trouble. 

"Lets just call it a night, I'm freezing my ass off here." She muttered to herself, trying to bring her coat as close to her body as possible, not wanting to lose what bit of warmth her body was keeping.

Unknowingly to the spider though, a mysterious figure with their infamous red helmet had stumbled upon her small clean up, the two barely missing each other.

He stared at the scene in front of him, his helmet quickly getting to work in scanning the mysterious webs. With his boots softly kicking at the small puddles on the ground, he crouched down, taking a closer look at the webs.

His helmet broke down the composition of the webs, seeing how it was made with a few chemicals. Reaching out his hand, he began to touch the webs a bit, trying to rip at it for a sample.

It clung to his leather glove, and it took a bit of force until it got unstuck, it almost took his glove with it with how hard he was pulling.

"The hell..?" He muttered to himself.

He rubbed his fingers together, some of stickiness staying on his gloved fingers. He took out his knife from one of his secret pockets instead and cut a bit of the web off, making it cling to his blade.

"This shit better come off..." He grumbled before putting his knife away. 

Standing up, he took out his grapple from his utility belt before disappearing into the night. 

---

The spider quickly shot up from her bed, her breathing irregular and covered in her sweat again, tortured once again by that never ending nightmare. Her eyes darting around her bedroom once more, she takes slow deep breaths before covering her eyes with her hands, the palm of her hands pressing into her eyelids.

Letting out a deep sigh, she got out of her bed, doing her morning routine once more. Scrolling through her phone, she looks at the news of Gotham City, most of them mainly about the many crimes of the city, some of politicians, and others of Bruce Wayne. 

Before putting her phone down though, a message popped from the top of her screen, it was from her new boss.

"I better have those photos by the end of this week!!!!" It had read.

The woman only rolled her eyes, turning off her phone so she could dump her face in water. 

Leaving her bathroom, she rubbed her moisturizer onto her face while making her way to her living room that also shared her kitchen. Starting up her coffee machine, she made herself a quick PB&J in the meantime. 

Leaning against the counter as she slowly ate her sandwich, the smell of coffee beginning to waft in the air, the vacationing vigilante took a good look at her small apartment. 

It was.. 

A bit bland to put it nicely. 

Guess she was going shopping today. Quickly downing her coffee without trying to burn her tongue, she quickly got dressed and headed out to do a bit of shopping, to make her apartment just a bit more welcoming for the time that she was staying in Gotham. 

Though she had a bit of a tight budget, she managed to buy a few things well within it that there was a little left over that she could buy herself dinner.

By the time she was done shopping though, the sun was beginning to set, meaning that it was nearly time for the criminals of Gotham to come crawling out of their hiding spots to cause some trouble.

"Shit..." She muttered under her breath, holding onto her plastic bags tightly, her shoes tapping against the cement as she quickly tries to make it back to her apartment before she got mugged.

Her senses have heightened a bit as a sense of panic and wariness began to settle in her stomach. Her eyes flitted about, cautious of every corner, every shadow, every alley, the last light sunset disappearing over the horizon.

Cursing under her breath, her steps quickened, and then there she saw it. A blur of bright red, green, and yellow flying in the air; it was Robin.

Her boss's text from this morning came back to her, which only made her curse more. Of course she didn't bring her camera. The handles of the bags hanging from one of her arms, she quickly fishes out her phone from her back pocket, turning the flash on to take a quick picture of Robin before he disappeared off into the night.

She cursed at his nimbleness, taking a small step back as he flies above her, but just as she was about to take the picture, she had bumped into something sturdy. 

Blinking, she slowly turned around, only to come face to face with someone's chest, Batman's symbol on a black shirt, but instead it was in red.

Slowly, she looked up, only to find herself face to face with the Red Hood.

Click!

The flash to her phone went off as she took a picture of him.

next chapter ->

#jason x reader #Jason Todd #batfam #batfamily #Bruce Wayne #Richard Grayson #Tim Drake #Cassandra Cain #Stephanie Brown #Damian Al Ghul #Damian Wayne #Duke Thomas #Barbara Gordan #dcu #dc universe #dick grayson #x reader #female reader #SpiderMan! Reader #or spiderwoman in this case #dcu x mcu #reader is a mix of all three spidermen of the spiderman movies #strangers to friends to lovers #slow burn #angst #I don't know what else to put I won't lie #I feel like tumblr tags are different from ao3 tags #am I doing this right??? #h e l p m e #to love and self loathe

[quillium]

Tim and Damian Sharing Robin

Think of it this way: A cafe only needs one barista at a time, but there are multiple baristas who cover different shifts

Scheduling errors where BOTH of them thought they were gonna be Robin that night and the ensuing fistfight

Scheduling errors where both of them thought the OTHER was gonna be Robin and the panic that ensues. Damian planned a trip to the art museum. Tim planned a date with Bernard. Bruce is like “I don’t NEED a Robin” and they’re both like “YES YOU DO”. Jason ends up being Robin. Everyone assumes Robin simply got hit by a magic spell that made him Buff and Twice His Size

Tim and Dami sometimes getting mixed up for each other. Tim is mortified that he’s short enough that people think he might be the same person as his ten year old brother

People who think there’s just one Robin assuming that Robin just brings his sword out when he feels more murdery and his bo staff when he feels less murdery

Bernard being like “I have a conspiracy theory where Red Robin sometimes acts as Robin because of the bo staff, different looks, and different character”. Tim is like. Wow my boyfriend is so smart. Time to gaslight him.

Tim and Dami switching Robin shifts without informing Bruce and letting Bruce be absolutely baffled and off-footed when a different son shows up.

Bruce is like “tonight Tim is Robin so we’ll look into [investigation that requires computer skills]”. Dami shows up and Bruce is like uh oh. This is why Bruce has like 50 different contingency plans, because his children just do stuff without telling him and it destroys all his og plans

One time Tim and Dami switch and Bruce doesn’t notice for a solid 10 minutes because he’s so sleep deprived

Core Four invites Tim to a group get-together so he asks Damian to switch shifts with him, Damian demands a bribe, Tim gives Damian a new set of brushes

Damian wants to go see an animated movie with his art club, tries to ask Dick to ask Tim to switch with him, Tim appears very smug and tries to ask for a favour in turn but then Dick being a DICK says that Tim has to be the “older brother” and “if he’d do it anyways he should just do it” and “as the older brother you can’t take advantage of a ten year old”

Tim: I’m supposed to be MATURE and just allow the switch without forcing you to take my weekend shifts-- Damian: HAH Tim: --BUT I’M NOT MATURE SO TAKE THE WEEKEND SHIFTS SO I CAN STAY WITH THE KENTS ON THE LONG WEEKEND.

Tim and Damian forming a union and presenting their terms and conditions to Bruce saying that they’ll strike unless he agrees. Bruce, exhausted, points out that he has literally been trying for over a decade to get Robin to stop existing and that THEY were the ones to force him to accept them as superheroes. He gives into the union’s conditions anyways.

#dc #batfam #Tim Drake #Timothy Drake #Damian Wayne #Damian al Ghul #sharing robin au #tim and damian: you will have no robin unless you have a movie night with us once a week! #bruce who literally fired dick from robin bc he was scared for dick's health and told tim he refused to have another robin and didn't even #appoint damian as robin and literally only has robin bc his reckless children will go whether he approves or NOT and it may as well be #with his support and supervision so that he can try to keep them safe: #i literally would've had movie night with you anyways bc i love you and also yes please stop being robin please stop #tim and damian BOTH being robin allowing each other to explore more of a normal non-cape life + have better overall health #bruce being so pleasantly surprised by his sons going OUT with FRIENDS and CHOOSING to spend nights at home etc #alfred looks at bruce like. so when are YOU getting a coworker batman. b is like. idk what you're talking about??? i'm fine??? #bruce is btw like. in his forties or fifties and his joints are COMPLAINING about all his time as batman #clark shows up one day like 'i can be your coworker batman!!!' and bruce is like #first of all you are already superman. second of all you can't work in gotham. third of all. i refuse. #it's clownery your honour

[ciel-em]

Crack fic idea for the bats!

Bats vs Graboids, Shriekers, and Ass Blasters

I just think it would be funny for them to snipe at each other while trying not to die (because they refuse to call for help. The prideful motherfuckers)

#was rewatching the movies with my sisters and thought about this #what if they made it a competition about who killed the most #and the three stages are worth different points on difficulty #winner gets all of Alfred's cookies when they get back #batfam #bruce wayne #dick grayson #jason todd #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #tim drake #duke thomas #damian wayne

[otaku-in-red]

Has anyone seen the Merry Little Batman trailer and just-

#dc comics #batman #batfam #damian wayne #I mean I get that it's a movie for kids #but what the fyuk is this

[summerbummin]

I think Cass would prefer animated TV over live action where she can tell the actors are pretending

She’d love studio ghibli and you can’t change my mind

#cassandra cain #dcu #dc comics #batgirl #black bat #headcanons #batfam #batman #comment what you think her favorite movie would be

[spyderschaos]

I love batfam Peter Parker fics (I know exactly jackshit about Batman characters)

#seriously #the only batman-ish related content I’ve consumed would be the 2003 teen titans #and that doesn’t rlly count for Batman like at all #just Robin #y’know #being there #but still batfam Peter Parker fics are my favorite #spyder’s chaos #spider man #oh and ig I’ve watched the Lego Batman movie but it’s been too long and tbh I don’t remember what happens in it

[batfamhyperfixation]

Dude, Jason was low-key lucky Bruce had just him in the manor when he was Robin. If Jason was his Robin, but set now, do you know how mercilessly they would make fun of this:

They would take photos of him in his Robin outfit and send them side by side with Coraline, they would get him this doll:

for every single holiday (even holidays you don't send presents like arbor Day and veterans Day, even obscure holidays like national chocolate milk day, anything to have an excuse) until he had a collection of like over 100 of them. They would leave a box of buttons addressed to him in every room and everywhere he would go to investigate and even places like galas. It wouldnt stop until Bruce or Alfred intervened.

#they made bruce watch coraline with all of them #and when they show coraline in her raincoat he just nudged Jason and said thought that was you for a minute #and the other batkids just stop the movie and are like what now #and Bruce pulls out photos of jason like this and they start calling him coraline #jason disappears for years in hopes that this will die down #then the first thing they say when he gets back is 'how was your visit with your other-father' and 'no button eyes huh' #jason todd robin #jason todd #batkids #batfam #bat family #bruce wayne #batman #batman and robin #coraline

[distort-opia]

One of my batjokes headcanons is that bruce and joker share a love for movies from the 30s and 40s (bruce obviously wouldnt want to rewatch zorro but i think he would still like other movies from that era)

I believe there was something similar to this in Half Way Across

That's likely, yeah! Joker definitely likes classic comedy movies from that era (as mentioned in Going Sane). And well, Bruce's favorite movie was The Mark of Zorro before tragedy struck... so this could be something they share.

#although I don't much see Bruce watching movies on his own. he wouldn't have a good idea of what he likes or dislikes #he's too practical and too busy to personally indulge #the movies he's watched as an adult are probably more to educate himself and/or movies the Batfam wanted to see #asks #batjokes headcanons

[yellowocaballero]

hi! I was winding down after school stuff and rereading some of the reverse Batman au (awesome by the way. You understand so many things) and am I tripping or did u make a Batman fic rec post a while ago? I can’t find it, but it’s also been a long time. I crave the sustenance. Also I honestly didn’t realize it’s literally been three years until you pointed it out in your newest fic (Incredible btw) guess I can finally officially declare myself a long time fan. Cheers!!

HAH Hello thank you for being a long time reader! That story certainly reads like it was written a long time ago...I put up the Cass story just so I could love the AU on a more adept note jkaljd. That being said, I'm now thinking about The Secret Life Of Jason Todd, so....

I can't find the post either :(. I think it was a rec lists specifically for good Tim Drakes, and as a result it was extremely skimpy. Literally, it was just Chirp by Amari_T, The Bat's Crest, and Red Raven (the most bonkers fanfic ever written, and one of my favorites). I have a lot more Batman fanfics in general I like, but most of them escape me now - it's mostly classics, like lowflyingfruit's stuff.

Every so often when I need fuel in my tank to go back to writing The Stupidest Magnum Opus Of All Time, I crack open the Batfam fanfic and plow through a bunch. I am then angry enough that I tackle my fic again and produce the best fic I've ever written in my life.

To be a little less negative (for once.), I do want to highlight something specific - All I Have by Janie_Loops is a really nice story, and although a LOT of stories try to do what it does, it's one of the few ones that succeeds. It helps that it's a series of snapshot chapters, which relieves you from having to do a lot of plotting (shoves someone will remember us under the bed), but there's a lot of reasons why it works. Each chapter is very much Bruce vs. Something, whether it's one of his kids or the JL or The World. The conflicts are baby sized, but they always feel very big and World Ending to Bruce, no matter the actual conflict. Everything is equally sized in this story, from the intra-baby problems to the Justice League issues. Bruce's characterization is very consistent and he's reliably forced to grow and change over the course of the fic. And every kid has a stand-out personality (that's so grounded - I was totally Jason!) that creates specific dynamics with each other, they all have different relationships and favorites between each other and Bruce, and their bond is a family is shown not through, like, bonding moments, but how they tackle problems together and how they're always on the same side. It's also deeply funny.

I think the author's a kiddo (who takes suggestions from their baby brother - ADORABLE), and there's still some ways for them to grow in prose and technical skill and a few other things like that. But even if the writer's a relative beginner writer, and you can see where they'll grow, you immedietly understand when reading that this person understands how a story works. That's way, way more important than having beautiful prose. I'm just saying all of this to hopefully demonstrate that, as writers, technical skill and prose will happen naturally with enough work & reading. Don't stress about that. Prose isn't what makes your story enjoyable and a good read. It's if you get what makes a story go. Everything else can come in time.

#my asks #ppl seem to think that a story meant to be 'feel good' #isn't obligated to do like #anything that a story is meant to do #fluff stories dont need conflict! conflict is stressful #guys you cannot all sit here and tell me that like #fanfic is an art form fanfic is legitimate writing we need to respect fanfic was we would books #and then turn around and tell me that fanfic is exempt from having to competently tell a story #what makes a story feel good isn't that it doesn't have conflict #its that the conflict is PREDICTABLE #and has an uncomplicated happy ending #it doesn't have no plot it just has a plot that we can follow along without any stress bc we know whats happening #i mean this sincerely. fluff writers go watch 10 hallmark movies #and then come back and you will write very effective fluff. #what do you think hallmark movies are. #oh my god im constantly shocked by how salty i am about batfam fluff #JAKLSDLKJF