It hit me again. I knew it, I’ve always known it, but it still hits me every. Single. Time.
I am never, ever going to wake up one morning and “just be normal.” I’m not. There are supposedly “obvious” things I will never think of until someone says “hey, why don’t you just do x?”
I will be in my nineties, hanging out at the old age home, and one of the ladies I play poker or whatever with will be like, “you hold your cards weirdly– isn’t that uncomfortable?” And I’ll switch to the way she’s showing me and be like, “how did I never figure this out before? It seems so obvious.”
I am that person. I am always going to be that person. And I need to find a way to live with that. To say “okay, now that I have this new information, use it, rather than just getting annoyed at the people who assume I’m being intentionally obtuse.” I need to figure out how to ask for help more often, even if it’s not a big deal, because there just might be a simpler method I’m just not thinking of.
And I need to stop assuming that other people have a running commentary in my head and just know what it is I do or don’t understand.
Because I’m the one who has to live with whatever happens.
Why Is What Is Normal Constantly Changing
Every post I make in which I discuss normal I highlight how what is normal for humans is completely and entirely derived from the normal human behavioural trait of wanting to do everything possible to survive.
The main way we learn to survive is by copying others, and the reason normal is constantly changing is because we are constantly changing the people we choose to copy off based on how well…
I’ve never known two more painful words in all existence. If you aren’t one you are the other and people seem to assign negatively meanings to both. I’ve seen people be miserable because they aren’t special and then miserable because they want to be normal.
Why do we have to be either of these things? Why isn’t it enough to just be who we are? It took me a lot of time, and a ton of tears to realize I didn’t have to live up to the expectations of being either. Honestly its to much of a burden and far to exhausting to be anything but my own person.
You can’t live the entirety of your life tied to the expectations of your circumstances, gender, religion or any other circumstances. If you’re being untrue to your spirit and your heart to make others happy then you’re not really living. You’re harming yourself and that’s no way for any one person to live.
So, my loves, you dont have to be special and you don’t have to be normal. But what you do need to be is happy. After all you deal with, after all you toil through you deserve that much. So please, put away everything you think you have to be for everyone else and be who you are. Be your own normal, your own special. Just so long as it doesn’t involve you losing who you truly want to be.
Please be kind to yourself and others when its possible. I love you all so much🥰
One-half of one of my first ships. (She always knows just what to say.)
makes me annoyed there’s no articles about neurotypical people dealing with hard life events and such. neurotypicals fascinate me.
the only ones who are ever studied are the nuerodivergents / mentally ill / mentally disordered etc.
I wanna learn about the people who are mentally stable.
more than that, I want for there to exist those articles so that when those mentally stable people come across them, they face the reality that they aren’t normal. “normal” doesn’t exist, and when we have these articles that showcase the mentally unstable person’s experience and life in statistics like it’s news, we alienate them and make it seem like they’re a rare breed, when we aren’t. we are as normal as the neurotypicals but showing us as “different” (with the negative connotation meant to other the people we can’t relate to) tells us a different story.
in essence, make articles about neurotypicals.
I want to learn about them, and more than that, I want them to learn about themselves in relation to us.
So anyone else has this problem of not knowing what to say when a girl appreciates or compliments you because if you just say thank you, it seems inadequate and if you compliment back in return you’ll probably over do it and people will think you’re gay which you are but no one knows because you live in the closet and it’ll become awkward and so you reply a day later after a weird response that you think is normal….. Help
Is is possible to have a platonic crush on someone, cus I am pretty sure I have that on all my close friends….
Can I see my norm
Is it tangible
Does it have color
Does it flow
Who defined the dimensions of it as it spun into an eternity milking dusty scenes of hoped for conformity making me appear contrite within the dissidence of my hard fought plight
Might I sing a song that explains the core of a dance made to embrace the stance of my truest existence
I have rope enough to fence it all in even as meaning falls away dead and slaps me into reluctant wakefulness
There is a core to a given heart that explains the start just as it is about to end so the journey has perceived relevance
And my norm exists within a dense brilliance that your naked eye resists and wholly ignores as my flow continually explores to define my self perceived shores
What more do I need to believe that my normalcy is a complexity weaved upon an evolving mesh with golden diamond threads made to mesmerize and entice as it defines me true to my fullest hue
My norm is my perfectly weighted uniquely sequenced balanced equation
I just realised that I most likely drink more coffee than some of my tachers. So by 30 I will most likely have like 10+ cups of coffee a day
Fleabag x Priest…
Martin x Otto…
And given that it is their 10th anniversary, shout out to the op, Sherlock and Watson…
Last song: Role of a Lifetime from Bare: A Pop Opera soundtrack 💔
Last Movie: … I’ve watched a lot of TV series rather so I have no idea. Does Hamilton proshot count?
Currently Reading: The Fleabag Scriptures is like permanently open on my Kindle 😂 All my reading is thesis related atm, lame!
Currently Watching: Gameplay of Ghost of Tsushima, but more generally The Crown and rewatching Charité at War.
Currently Consuming: Milk
Food I’m craving right now: It was Korean but now I’m satisfied, God I hope you’re satisfied…
I saw this on someone’s Tumblr and it kept my insomniac self occupied! I nominate anyone else who is struggling with exhibiting a normally sleep pattern 🤗
Today I was talking to my parents, and they said, “Nowadays all the kids are encouraged to be themselves. Back in our days, we were told to strive to be normal.” To this day, they still have an active intention to be as normal as possible.
Gen Z, and even millennials, aren’t told to be normal. Tbh, I don’t even know if there’s much of a normal left. We don’t have to get married before 30, or have kids. We don’t have to have a 9-5. The expectation is much different.
Instead, we’re taught to be ourselves. Do what makes us happy, as long as it’s not harmful to other people. Chase our dreams. Think for ourselves. Seek no validation except from yourself.
That opens up a sky of opportunities, with no outside forces of restriction in an ideal world. But I question, if they tell us to be ourselves, did they ever teach us how?
Maybe that’s why we’re called “the lost generation.” We were released into the wild without ever being taught how to fly, hunt, and protect ourselves, because frankly, it’s never been done before. We’re dropped in the middle of the ocean without being taught how to swim but instructed to survive.
I know that, in attempting to find myself, I lost myself. For the past few years, I’ve been stumbling blind while depression, anxiety, and panic threw rocks at me every time I stood back up. It feels like I have no choice but to resort to crawling on all fours as my tears and frustration laid the road ahead for me.
“Be yourself.” How am I supposed to be myself if I don’t know who I am? I know who I want to be, but I don’t know how to get there. I feel suffocated, wanting to move forward but no longer having the energy to go where I want to go. So I’m stuck, hating where I am, but unable to move.
What if I hate the person I am?
Hi I just had 1 coffee & now I can feel the energy pulsating through my left hand.
I looked up muscle spasms cause apparently a lot of people with eds get them so just in case I want to know how they are like. It looked like a little more extreme version of what I consider chills, so I decided to look up chills
Turns out I didn’t know what chills were. What I though were chills are completely different. Let me give a little description
It’ll happen about 1-6 times a month (have had these for at least 7 years so so hard to gage). I dont feel anything cold, but it’ll start in my back and my whole body will basically shiver. It’s not painful, but it’s certainly not tingly. It’ll only last a few seconds. I’m just kinda numb while everything is shaking. I also have a natural tremor, so I know that it’s nothing like that. I just don’t know.
Because of this I didn’t consider actually is chills, as chills. I just thought I get really cold easily. Sometimes ill just start shivering and my teeth are clattering. This will last at least several moments. Another thing I’ve had for years, so on average I’ll have one or two a week, but I’ve had them multiple times a day so I don’t know.
I also get chills right before I’m going to sweat a lot in my sleep, but those have no shaking and im pretty sure they’re related to blood pressure.
I’m just finding everyday that I know less and less about how a human body is supposed to work