#what on earth am i talking about. stopping now

[mssainz]

PART 2 | AFTER FIVE YEARS

Pairing: Carlos Sainz x Reader

Summary: Carlos Sainz finally met his son he had with her ex-wife, Y/N.

Warning: None

AN: We are still getting there guys. I'll update as soon as I can. Please bear with me. You can comment down so I can tag you for the next part. I hope you like this one. Love youuuu!

Cael faced Carlos. He said thank you and gave him his sweetest smile. The smile that he actually got from him. Yes, Cael is a spitting image of his father. He is indeed Carlos mini-me which you think is unfair as you are the one, who carried him for months and took care of him for years.

Looking at Carlos standing in front of you is making your world stop. Your shoes become glued, refusing to move your feet out of the ground and an immense silence dampens your ears. And the moment you met his eyes, your mind started to tell you to run but your body is casually betraying you. All of this made you rethink your decision to come back here.

Fate must be joking with me and this is not very funny.

“Mama, can I still get an ice cream?” Cael said, interrupting your train of thoughts. Your eyes move to your son.

Thank you baby, I think your ice cream will save us right now.

You smiled and gave him a nod of approval. You swiftly reached out for his hand and made a move. Years have passed and you thought you were completely healed and had the strength to face him again. But now that he is here, you realize that your wounds are still fresh.

Cael, get Mama out of here. Please, I'm still not ready for this. Not yet.

You didn't even say thank you to Carlos for returning your son safely in your arms. But before you can even walk away from him. Carlos called out for Cael, which made your son stop and look back at him.

“Wait Cael,” Carlos said and started walking towards you two.

What the hell? Get away from me. I mean from us.

He knelt down to talk to Cael. He is just a few inches away from you, talking with your son, with his son. You stand frozen beside Cael not knowing what to do. You are just trying to read what Carlos is trying to do and what's going on in his mind right now.

“I think I'm also craving ice cream. Can I come with you bud?” Carlos asked, not breaking eye contact with Cael.

Lies. You don't like ice cream Carlos. You are not fond of it. What are you even thinking right now? How can you stay so calm when I am literally about to faint here?

You saw how Cael’s face lit up. That glow in his eyes and that smile in his face, you knew he wanted Carlos to come with you two. No doubt about it you know Cael's expression very much.

“Mama, can he come with us?” Cael said looking up to you, waiting for your response. Carlos also looked at you.

“Mama please,” and there goes Cael giving you his puppy eyes. And Carlos smiling beside him is not helping the situation. You never know that Cael and Carlos combo is something you cannot resist.

“Okay, fine. He can come with us,” you gave in and rolled your eyes. Cael gave Carlos a high five before giggling with each other.

What is going on, seriously? How come these two get along so much when they just met? What on Earth is happening?

Carlos lifted Cael and carried him. Your jaw dropped but immediately brushed it off. You two walk side-by-side towards the ice cream stall. And it is the longest walk you have taken in your entire life. You can't help but wonder why Carlos is not asking you anything.

--------------------------------------------------

You bought two chocolate ice creams for the boys. Meanwhile, you got a pistachio ice cream for yourself. You didn't even want an ice cream in the first place but you needed something to do to lessen how awkward you feel about this whole situation. The three of you sat on the bench near the ice cream stall.

“Mama, what's the flavor you got?” Cael curiously asked while looking at what's on your hand.

“It's called pistachio ice cream, honey. Do you want to try it?” You asked Cael who is now sitting on Carlos lap. You try to focus on your son avoiding Carlos.

He is invisible, he is not here and he is not real.

Cael nodded and gave your ice cream a try. His face immediately wrinkled which made Carlos laugh.

“You didn't like it?” Carlos asked while wiping some of the ice cream at the corner of Cael's lips.

“It doesn't taste good, Mama. Chocolate is better,” Cael said after gulping the remaining pistachio in his mouth. You just laugh at your son's reaction.

You sat there awkwardly until you finished the ice cream. All this time you were munching the pistachio that you got, avoiding having conversation with Carlos. Fortunately, he is also not talking to you and just focused on Cael on his lap. They are casually teasing each other, giggling beside you. You are still puzzled why he is just enjoying the moment and not confronting you. You know he definitely has a clue on what's going on and you can notice that.

After having ice cream, Cael and Carlos decided to play tag. You have never seen Cael this happy. This view feels so wrong but feels right at the same time. It feels so wrong that that the boys have to meet this way. But it feels so right that they are finally having fun with each other.

--------------------------------------------------

The sky changes into its orange hue. Carlos offers to drive you two to where you are staying here in Madrid. You didn't refuse because you were too exhausted to even grab a cab.

“Where are you two staying?” These are the first words that he said to you. After five years of not seeing each other this is where you start your conversation.

“In a nearby Airbnb,” you bluntly replied.

As you entered his car, his scent started intoxicating you. It is still the same. This scent once felt like home but not anymore or as you make yourself believe it was not anymore.

The drive to your place was still awkward. You were in the passenger seat with Cael who is constantly asking you questions about what he is seeing on the road. And you can tell that Carlos is checking on you two in his rear-mirror.

“What was your name again?” Cael blurted out of nowhere while leaning to Carlos at the driver seat.

Wait, what Cael? Baby, you two played together and you didn't even know his name! Now it makes sense to me how you didn't even insist that he is your Papa immediately after he told you that maybe he just looks like him. Cael, I think I should remind you more about not talking to strangers, honey.

“You can call me Uncle Chilli,” You raised an eyebrow on what he just said.

Uncle Chilli, huh?

“Okay, Uncle Chilli,” Cael said giggling. You can see that he finds his name silly.

After almost an hour's drive, you finally arrived at your place. You immediately get out of his car with Cael. Carlos followed you two at the doorstep. You then opened the door and let Cael go in first.

“I think we need to talk,” Carlos said.

“Yes. We need to. That's I'm here,”

I'm calling all the angels and saints, the Avengers, and even Power Rangers. Please give me the strength to talk to this man.

TAG LIST:

@seasonswinter @charizznorizz @itsjustkhaos @celesteablack @openthenyoor01 @carlossainzbelongswithme @timmychalametsstuff @viennakarma @charlottef1 @i-love-ptv @evie-119 @somepeoplemaybe @amberpanda99 @gotthatname @karlossainz @wonderfulkawaii

#carlos sainz #carlos sainz x y/n #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz x you #f1 x reader #f1 x you #formula 1 x reader #formula one x you

[coco-loco-nut]

Book Club - Part 4

Pairing: Lance x Reader, Grid x Reader

Summary: no spoilers 😈

A/n: I’m not ready to let them go, so send in book club requests so we can keep the club going 🥲

requests are open 🗣️ masterlist

—————————

“Nico, when did you ask your wife to marry you?” you dangle upside down on his couch, just chilling and asking for life advice, similar to how the book club started.

“When I knew the time is right and she was the one. Are you second guessing Lance?” he asks, sitting in a chair beside you. You are both in your racing suits, ready for the upcoming race.

“Not necessarily, it’s just that we’ve been together for so long, and god I really love him. You could ask me to marry you right now and I’d say no, that’s how down bad I am,”

“He’s your pookie,” Nico says, smiling proudly at using slang.

“Hell yeah,” you high five him. “I know he wants to marry me, I just wish he’d propose,” you groan.

“Have you talked to him about it?”

“Never, ever, ask a girl that. And the answer is no. I just- I don’t want to rush him. I know Lancelot, and he’s gonna want to make it perfect, so I don’t want to make him feel rushed,” you explain and Nico nods.

“Well then, in an alternate universe, I have already asked you to marry me,” Nico says, trying to comfort you.

It’s true, on Earth 2, you and Nico are closer in age and married.

“God, I can only hope,” you grin at the Haas driver, moving to sit normally.

“Don’t worry about it, I see the way he looks at you, it’s only a matter of time,” Nico reassures you.

“Thank you. You really are one of my closest friends. Our little club is my family,” you tell Nico who pulls you into a hug.

“We always will be. Competitors on the track, family off the track,” Nico says as Kevin walks in.

“Y/n, you okay?” Kevin asks, sitting on the other side of you.

“I’m okay, just a little in my bag, probably about to start my period or something,” you wave Kevin off.

“Okay, well you are basically our grid daughter so if there is anything bothering you, let me know,” he gives you a small hug.

“Guys, stop, you are gonna make me cry for real,” you tell them, a little laughter in your voice.

“Alright, go crush this race,” Nico says, walking you out of Haas. You head back to your garage, feeling a lot better than you did before.

Little did you know, was you were venting to Nico, Lance was panicking in front of Fernando, Lewis, and Valtteri.

“What if she says no? Oh my god, she will finally admit that she actually despises me and barely tolerates me,” Lance paces.

“Mate. I don’t know if you noticed, but she looks at you like you hung the moon and the starts. You look at her like she is the thing that makes you live and breathe. You will be ok,” Lewis quotes the song he wrote based on the book you selected.

“Really?” Lance stops his pacing, his eyes shining happily.

“Yes, you two are insanely love sick, it is cute,” Fernando says, amused at the Canadian.

“Just ask her when she wins, she will be too excited to say no,” Valtteri says, Lewis and Fernando gasp, as well as Lance.

“That’s not nearly romantic enough,” Lance groans.

“We arranged for a romantic track walk and picnic at turn two, here is a book with a hole in the pages. When she opens it, eso,” Fernando says, confirming what they had been working on.

“It took a little convincing the FIA, but we did it,” Lewis says. Lance visibly relaxes, a lot of tension releasing.

“How can I repay you for this?” Lance asks, a little overwhelmed, but very grateful for their help.

“Take care of our grid daughter, make sure she is happy for the rest of her life,” Valtteri says simply.

“Hey guys, sorry we are late,” Daniel walks in with Checo.

“What did we miss?” Checo asks, sensing the odd atmosphere.

“Just giving Lance permission to marry our grid daughter,” Lewis tells them.

“Did you ask Kimi?” Daniel asks, the whole grid knows how close the two have gotten. You don’t have a great relationship with your dad, similar to Max, so Kimi has easily filled that role.

“He was the first person I asked, then I asked Kevin and Nico since she is really close with them,” Lance nods, knowing you are probably with them.

“We will be out there taking pictures, don’t worry,” Valtteri reassures the young Aston Martin driver.

“Amigos, it is race time,” Checo says, leading everyone out to the track. Lance spots you with Logan.

“Yeah, you can totally join, I’ll give my copy of this weeks book since I finished it. Just don’t tell the other non-club drivers,” you tell the American. You have gotten closer with him, seeing how excluded he is from some other groups in the Paddock.

“I’ll see you later, thanks for being a good friend,” Logan says, squeezing your shoulder gently.

“Hey, Lancie,” you grin, pressing a small kiss to his lips.

“Hello, love. Are you excited for our date after the race?” Lance asks, his hand resting on your waist, his warmth blocked by your fireproofs. You chat until you reach your respective destinations.

“Good luck, I’ll see you when I overtake you,” you tell him, and he returns your sentiments with a laugh.

You end up placing P4 after pushing the car harder than you ever had before, so you were extremely pleased. After a shower, media responsibilities, and debriefs, you change into a sundress and fix your hair. Lance meets you outside the motorhome, looking handsome in a button up and dress pants.

“You look so hot,” you tell him, jaw dropped a little. 10/10 girls would agree that the only thing hotter than a guy with a baby or small animal, is a guy dressed up in a well fitting suit.

“You look cuter,” he kisses you sweetly, grabbing your hand as he leads you through the paddock to the track. He told you about the track walk after weighing in. The grid helped him set up the date spot while you got ready. Your breath is taken away a bit when you approach turn two. There are fairy lights hanging from the fence and a blanket with a picnic basket on the track.

“Lance, this is incredible. How did you set it up?” you ask him in awe. The clear night sky lets stars shine bright above you.

“The grid helped, especially Fernando, he’s a big romantic and really liked the idea,” Lance admitted shyly.

“It’s perfect,” you take his hand to assist you in sitting down. Lance sits beside you, offering you a snack from the picnic basket. Conversation flows easily between you, talking about anything and everything except for racing, the one topic always off limits on date nights. Lance reaches into the basket and pulls out a book.

“I got you a little something,” Lance says, pushing down his nerves. Out of the corner of his eyes, he can see the grid popping out of their hiding spots in the grass area.

“I do love my books,” you smile, taking the book from him. As you usually do, you flip through the first few pages, pausing when you see a ring taped to the third page.

“I had a big speech planned, but will you let me make you happy for the rest of your life and make me happy the rest of mine by marrying me?” Lance asks and you can only nod as tears start flowing. You launch yourself into his arms, holding him close.

“I love you so much,” you whisper and he holds you tighter.

“I love you more,” he says. You pull away slightly and kiss him. Lance carefully removes the ring from the book and puts it on your hand. It’s simple yet stunning, absolutely perfect for you. You both look at the grid when they start cheering and hollering.

There is a social media intern for Formula One somewhere in the group who captured the whole thing on video, Fernando paid her under the table for it and he hid another camera and microphone on the wall of the track. He knew the guys would only remember to get pictures.

You take your time thanking each driver and hugging them, you really tear up when you see Kimi there.

“Congratulations, you raced so well today, I am very happy for you,” Kimi actually hugs you, if there wasn’t photo proof from Lando and Daniel, who’s jpg accounts broke the news of the engagement (you wouldn’t want it any other way), people wouldn’t believe it.

“Thank you. Wait, you said you weren’t going to be here for the race!” you gasp, looking at him a little betrayed.

“If you knew I was here, you would insist on getting dinner with me instead of going on a date,” Kimi shrugs, a small knowing smile on his face. Not only is he basically your dad now, he has been mentoring you a few times a week, even hopping in the sim once in a while.

“You’re right. I’m just glad you approve,” you smile as Lance wraps an arm around your waist.

“He was the first person I asked,” Lance kisses the side of your head.

“Wait, I thought we were the first,” Kevin says, looking at Nico.

“As long as she’s happy, I’ll get over it,” Nico jokingly mourns his loss of you.

“The ring is gorgeous,” George says, inspecting it. He is the babygirl of the group.

“Alright guys, let’s leave the happy couple alone,” Logan says, Lewis helping him herd everyone away from you and Lance.

“This may have been the most perfect day ever,” you sigh happily.

“Only because I am with the perfect girl,” Lance grins at you, holding you close as a blush covers your face.

“Shut up,” you giggle, pulling him down onto the blanket with you. He holds you in his arms for a few minutes before you yawn.

“Let’s get you back to the hotel,” Lance chuckles, helping you stand up. He is grateful that his assistant is taking care of the cleanup and your assistant packed up your drivers room for you.

“Mhmm, I need cuddles ASAP,” you yawn again, thankful for everything the day has brought you and that the hotel is close by. When you get back, it doesn’t take too long for you to crash.

“How did I get so lucky?” Lance whispers, pulling you close to him. Your steady breathing lulls him to sleep.

#f1 imagines #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #checo perez #daniel ricciardo #f1 grid #f1 grid x reader #george russell #kevin magnussen #fernando alonso #valtteri bottas #lance stroll x reader #lance stroll #lewis hamilton #nico hulkenberg #kimi raikkonen

[that-basic-simp]

Dance

Mizu X Fem!Reader CW: N/A WC: 1.6k+

Sticking my finger in between the collar and my neck, I tried stretching the fabric out so I could have some breathing room. I let out a sigh as it was futile. Trying to blend in in London was a lot harder than it was in Japan. Maybe it was because I had to wear completely different clothing and still pretend to be a man as well, since women were treated practically the same as in Japan. Not to mention I was also half Japanese and raven black hair wasn't really common among the white folk. Brown was, but not black like mine. Not to mention I had to wear it down and not in my normal bun. I still stood out like a sore thumb, but at least my eyes kind of matched theirs.

Sighing, I looked at myself in the mirror that was in front of me. This ball, this dance I was attending apparently was where Skeffington was going to be. Fowler made sure of it. I still don't trust him. But if I am able to get to both Skeffington and Routely through Fowler, I might as well keep him alive. If I can get all three of them in a room together, that'll be even better. Three birds with one sword. Getting ready, I made sure I had my sword on me before giving myself one more glance in the mirror, catching something from the corner of my eye.

"Who's there?" I turned, my hand on the hilt of my sword.

Scanning the shadows, someone came out. They were wearing a poofy and long dress, similar to the ones I've seen the ladies wear here.

"Y/N?"

"Mizu," she smiled.

"W-What are you doing here? I thought you left Edo and went back with Ringo."

"Nope. I followed you."

"Why on Earth would you follow me?"

"You need someone to watch your back."

"I am more than capable of watching my own back, thank you very much."

"Mizu, this isn't Japan. You're in London."

"I am well aware of that."

"They have guns. You have a sword. They're technologically more advanced than you are right now. And right now," she pulled the dress back a bit, revealing a gun strapped to her thigh. "You're going to need all the firearms you can get. You will never raise a gun, I know that much."

"I did back at Edo when fighting Fowler."

"But did you shoot it?"

"No."

"Exactly. You use your sword and I will use the gun. Understood?"

I sighed. It's not like she can go back to Japan. I can't ensure her safety getting there either. So she had to stay with me. No. She has to stay with me. I can't afford to lose her.

"You stay beside me no matter what. Is that understood, Y/N?"

"Yes, Mizu."

"Good. I don't want you wandering anywhere without me."

She nodded her head. Letting out a sigh, I extended my arm out for her. Locking her one arm around mine, we walked out of the room and towards the ball down the street. It took a lot of negotiating and talking, but Fowler was able to ensure we got in without any trouble. This was definitely going to be an interesting night. I just hope it doesn't go to shit and one of ends up injured. If anyone was going to be injured, I was going to ensure it would be me. No one lays a hand on Y/N.

Stepping into the giant castle that held the dance, I found Y/N gasping from the corner of my eye. I couldn't deny it, this place was a sight to behold. A wonder in and of itself. It made the palaces and castles back in Japan look like a house. No wonder the white people wanted to have ballroom dances every so often. They had to get use out of it. Or else there would be nothing to fill this much empty space. There were people going around with trays in their hands, some drinks on them. Y/N was about to reach for one, but I stopped her.

"You're not going to like it."

"What do you mean?"

"We're not from around here. We need to blend in. And we won't blend in if we drink their drinks and be sick all night because of it. They don't drink sake. They drink some other form of alcohol that I am not familiar with."

"Come on, Mizu. We can't indulge ourselves every once in a while?"

"Back at home, yes. But we're not at home, are we, Y/N?"

"We'll be fine," she said, removing her arm from around mine and disappearing into the crowd.

"Y/N? Y/N?! Fuck!" I darted off into the crowd, trying to find her. It should be easy, since she wasn't anywhere near as tall as the people here.

Making my way through the crowd, I still kept an eye out for Skeffington. He was tall, so that was one thing that was going for me. Everyone here was tall, which didn't help. Almost bumping into everyone there, I eventually bumped into the right person. Well, one of them.

"Pardon me," a tall man said, smoothing out his suit.

Narrowing my eyes, it was him. It was Skeffington. Fowler described him perfectly and he matched every detail. The only thing that we had in common was our height, as Fowler stated back in Japan. Standing straight up, I stuck my hand out. Peering down, Skeffington shook it.

"Pleasure," I said.

"Night is wonderful, is it not?"

"I guess you could say that," I said, turning towards the crowd of people. He did the same.

"Who wouldn't love a dance tonight? It's a perfect night to do so," he chuckled, holding a glass of something that looked to be a yellow color.

"I'm sure there are other perfect nights," I said, trying to go along with him.

"There are, but tonight is especially perfect."

"What makes you say that? I think all nights are perfect."

"Well, there are reasons to celebrate."

"Celebrate what exactly?" I slowly turned towards him.

"Does there need to be a specific reason to celebrate? We're in London!" he turned towards me.

His breath reeked of alcohol and it made me want to gag. It wasn't the best smelling alcohol, I mean, what alcohol smells good?

"Go, my friend! Dance! Celebrate!"

He shoved me towards the dance floor, which I stumbled slightly. Getting my footing, since I was not used to my entire feet being covered, I slowly started to make my way around the crowd again, trying to find Y/N. Walking through the people on the dance floor, the live band playing started to get into a slower song, one that was obviously meant for couples. Even though I didn't take it to be that kind of ball. But again, this is London. Briskly walking off the floor, someone grabbed my wrist and pulled me back on. I thought it was Y/N, but it was someone else.

"Well, aren't you a dashing young man," the woman smiled.

"I-I--uhm," I struggled to find the right words.

"Come now, don't be shy," she said. "Come take a dance with me."

"I-I must decline," I respectfully pushed her away. "I am looking for someone."

"They can wait, dear. Have a drink! Dance. Stay a while."

"I-I really must be looking for my--"

"Hey!"

Marching over was Y/N. I let out a sigh of relief as she stood in between me and the other woman.

"Well, look who came barreling in," the woman smirked, trying to be funny.

"Step away from him," she slurred.

How many drinks did she have?

"You're too drunk, hon. You should probably head home, where it's safe. You don't want anyone taking advantage of you."

"You better back the fuck up," she swayed here and there.

"Y/N," I reached over and grabbed her shoulder, pulling her towards me. "Let's get going. You need to rest."

"Hold on, Mizu. I gotta teach this bitch a lesson."

"Excuse me?" the woman gasped.

I couldn't help but smile. Who knew Y/N was a protective drunk. I just hope she doesn't pull out the gun on this woman.

"Yeah. You heard me. You're a bitch. But not like those big ones that are scary. More like those little ones that are yappy. Annoying to listen and look at."

The woman scoffed, "I'll have you know--"

"'i'Ll HaVe YoU kNoW'," Y/N said in a mocking tone.

I placed my hand over my mouth, trying not to laugh at the situation.

"What are you laughing at?" the woman pointed a finger at me.

"I-I'm sorry," I said.

"Hey, don't point your finger at him. Only I can do that."

"What? You order around this stick of a man?"

"I'll have you know, Mizu is not a stick of a man. He's quite athletic."

"Oh, now why don't we have a look see," the woman stepped closer to Mizu.

"Hey, back off. No one touches him other than me."

"And does he like touching you when you're drunk?"

"Fuck yeah. We get down and dirty," she started to thrust her hips and some blush started to crawl onto my cheeks.

The woman was disgusted and walked off. Y/N turned to face me, perking up and smiling at me.

"Were you drunk?"

"No," she said.

"So you acted drunk?"

"Yep," she flashed a proud smile. "No one touches my Mizu."

A soft smile appeared as I took her hand, "And no one touches my Y/N."

The music started to slow down to a soft melody, one where someone could fall asleep to, or dance to. Still holding her hand, I bowed to her.

"May I have this dance, Y/N?"

"Of course, Mizu."

We walked out onto the dance floor and danced with the other people there. My one arm wrapped around her waist while her one arm wrapped around my neck, the tips of her fingers digging into the back of my hairline. Our other hands intertwined with one another's and we started to spin and sway with the music. She leaned her body into me, the side of her head nuzzling against mine. I smiled, closing my eyes, enjoying this moment together. It was rare for us to get any semblance of peace. Tonight was going to be that night where we relished it in. In each other.

#mizu x reader #bes mizu #mizu blue eye samurai #mizu #blue eye samurai

[teejaystumbles]

Against all odds (part 7)

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4 // Part 5 // Part 6

This is all I've got so far but I figured I'd let you have it and hopefully I'll have more soon :3

**

Hob works at a news agency. As someone with hundreds of years of experiencing political and societal change he has a keen eye for news-worthy happenings. Often he can predict very well which events are important, which will have historical influence or be the talk of the nation for a long time. Hob edits his colleague’s articles and reports, chooses which ones are worthy of printing and which aren’t, tries to remove or at least mitigate the xenophobia and fearmongering in what he hopes are the last days of the Cold War. People don’t need fear to grow, they need hope. He thinks he’ll stop doing this soon, though. His name - Robert Goulding at the moment - pops up in too many places and he doesn’t like being recognizable for more than a few decades. He takes care to not become chief editor and stay out of the limelight but he thinks he’ll move on soon. Maybe he’ll take a break and live off his stock profits. Find a quiet place for him and his stranger, somewhere in the countryside, with a garden…

Hob shakes himself out of his fantasy and laughs at himself. Wishful thinking will hardly be of any use. He’s been wishing and hoping for more time with his stranger for so many centuries. Now it finally seems like he might get lucky enough to have regular contact, via journal entries, and maybe even visits. That is enough. He shouldn’t be greedy.

With a sigh and a silent curse that he stopped smoking he goes to finish his work so he can get home and write an answer to his friend.

In the evening Hob pours himself a whiskey and sits down at his desk, open journal before him. He looks over to his bed. His stranger had sat here last night, watching him. Hob swallows reflexively and takes another sip of his drink, trying to not let his thoughts go down a slippery, horny slope before he starts writing.

June 15th, 1989

Dear friend,

I am glad you felt you could come and visit me and that you feel safe in my presence. I consider it an honour and I want to assure you that I do not mind in the least if you stop by whenever you feel like it. I trust you. Feel free to come here anytime, no matter if I'm awake or not, or if I’m even here. If my place can be a retreat for you from your everyday worries or workplace (as I assume you are busy doing something somewhere), I would be very happy. Leave your shoes off the sofa, that’s all I ask. ;-)

But seriously, my home is your home. I mean it. I look forward to seeing you again as well.

Reading about your ordeal was horrible. I am so sorry this happened to you and that I didn’t hear anything about it. I would have moved everything between Heaven and Earth to free you, my friend, please believe me. You say the ones responsible have been punished but I cannot stop myself from imagining visiting vengeance upon them for your sake. To imprison you someone, anyone, for such a long period of time, in the conditions that you described, is barbaric and the rage I feel at the mere thought is nearly blinding.

I am deeply sorry for your loss and for all you had to endure. I would give you anything in my power to make you feel safe, dear stranger. If you ever need my help, please call me. I don’t know if you had any means to call for help, you probably didn’t, but please - should you ever be in any trouble or danger or in need of help, I urge you to call on me! I will come and help you the best I can, I will not allow you to be trapped ever again. After all, what are friends for, if not for helping one another?

Your problems with closed spaces and strangers are completely understandable and I would never hold it against you if you never want to meet inside a building again. I hope we’ll be able to find a suitable replacement for the old haunt, at least until you feel more at ease again. These things take time, at least for humans, and although I would not dare to insinuate that you are not more robust than the average human and probably not subject to the same physical and mental limits I’d wager a guess that you will need time to heal, my friend. I sincerely ask you to take that time. You strike me as the type to jump headfirst back into work and duty after getting free and that is not recommended, no matter what or how powerful you are. You were imprisoned for 80 years and subjected to torture, you cannot expect to be the same after that. No one should expect you to be the same, to not be changed by it or in need of healing and time to recuperate. 

I am only human but in my long life I have met a few other immortal beings, not all of them human but all of them with very similar needs and wants. I know you’re probably bristling right now because I dare to suggest you might be unfit for whatever it is you do but I hope you believe me when I tell you this only because I care for you - you need a break. Please, stranger, promise me you’ll take care of yourself, if you cannot let others do that for you. I would be happy to help in any way I can. Visit me at your leisure, I promise I will never turn you away, or look down on you for showing weakness. You have seen me at my lowest and I have always trusted you to still respect me after that. Just like that, I would never think any less of you for any of this.

I’ll be happy to help you learn more about humanity, get to know humans again. I am honoured that you have elevated me in your mind to something else but I am as human as they come. So if you like me, you can like other humans as well, right?

I will think of a nice place to meet and let you know as soon as I’ve decided. Remember, in the meantime this place is always open to you. Even including watching me sleep. ;-P

Stay safe,

Your friend Hob

Hob puts down the pen and skims over his lines. Yes, that’s not too forward but inviting enough to let his stranger feel safe and welcome. It’s a bit daring, calling his stranger in need of a break, but it’s the right thing to say and offer.

He nods, downs his whiskey and gets ready for bed.

#stay tuned for another dream😘 #dreamling #the sandman fanfiction #1989 au #teejay writes

[starheirxero]

OH GOD, EVERYTHING IS HAPPENING, EVERYTHING'S GOING ON-

I AM SCREAMING, KICKING, CRYING, RUNNING UP MY WALLS, DRAMATICALLY THROWING MYSELF ON THE GROUND AND WAILING-

FIRST SAMS FUCKING PUNCHES AND KNOCKS ME TO THE GROUND, AND THEN MGAFS GIVES ME THE FINISHING BLOW- FUCK EVERYTHING-

OH GOD, WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN-

First of all, we finally reunited with old Moon…BY GOD, DID I MISS THIS SNARKY BASTARD- I am so happy, to see him again!!! He's so nonchalant and blunt, especially towards people outside of his family- It makes me so nostalgic!! His similarlities to Eclipse are clearer than ever, honestly!

Everything about it just makes me so emotional, I can't even begin to describe it-

He's on that same old beach where he gave up his life, the same old beach where he showed empathy and compassion more than ever before, the same damn old beach where he was the more selfless than he'd ever been- It is making me sick to my stomach/pos

He still loathes himself so much, still looks down on himself and his mistakes. He has never been able to let go of it, he'll always hold on to the mistakes he made. One of these mistakes is leaving a part of his code behind, which in turn created Eclipse. His hatred for him comes from the hatred of himself, because Eclipse is the embodiment of everything he hated in himself.

But even though he hates himself, even though he buried himself underneath a mountain of mistakes, he will never regret protecting his family. He has always been a big brother, always been a protector, no matter what! Even after everything, they are the only thing on his mind. I'm going to fucking cry, man-

God, he adores them so much! Everytime he talked about them, I teared up!

He adores and treasures Sun with all of his heart, and only wishes for him to be safe and sound and happy! He knows his brother, knows he's blaming himself, and wants so badly to put a stop to it! But he can't, because that would involve a conversation, and he cannot bare to hurt him more than he already has.

He wants to thank Monty, who has been his emotional support, his best friend. Old Moon is anti-social, apathetic towards anyone outside of his family, even another version of himself, yet Monty got through to him, time and time again. Monty, in their own right, was family too! The two of them always got each other out of the gutter.

God, when he talked about Lunar and Earth, I legit started to cry a little-

He always wanted a sister. He always wanted a little brother. He wished he could've met them, wished he could've gotten to know them, wished to have loved them as much as he loved Sun!

He did know Lunar, but he never had the chance to truly get to know them. Everything he said about them is honestly just so sweet, and shows old Moon beyond his shell.

They were just a kid in a shitty situation, made with a purpose they never wanted.

Old Moon has a hard time caring for others, yet he looked at this child, who needed help and guidance, and took them underneath his wing without hesitation. Tragically, though, he always kept his distance. I don't think, he quite saw, how much they looked up to him. He always kept them at arms length, because he had hurt one brother, and was afraid to hurt another, afraid to open his heart. Yet, despite this distance, he would've ripped Eclipse apart for what he did, without mercy.

God, I can only imagine what his dynamic with everyone would've been like, especially with Earth, who is so incredibly different from him!

Old Moon is such an intriguing character to look at! Especially with how obviously different he is from New Moon!

I want to analyze him so bad, but my brain just won't cooperate👀

I'm really glad, New Moon got his reassurance though, and even learned from Old Moon, it seems!

Now, as for MGAFS….NO, GOD NO, PLEASE EVERYTHING BUT THIS-

THEY WEREN'T JUST SEPARATED- THEY WERE PERMANENTLY TORN APART, NEVER TO REUNITE AGAIN- THEY CAN'T DO THIS, I CAN'T HANDLE THIS-

BLOODMOON'S REACTION TO HIS BROTHER'S DEATH- HE TRIED SO HARD TO KEEP A STRAIGHT FACE, BUT THE MOMENT THEY TRIED TO LEAVE, HE STARTED YELLING- HE HAS NEVER BEEN ALONE, ALWAYS ONE HALF OF A WHOLE. NOW HIS OTHER HALF IS GONE, AND HE IS ALONE, AND HE WILL NEVER BE WHOLE AGAIN-

I ALSO READ YOUR INTERPRETATION OF BLOODMOON'S LAST LINE, AND IT HAS BROKEN ME- THEY COULD'VE BEEN GOOD. THEY COULD'VE BEEN FRIENDS. THEY JUST DIDN'T WANT TO BE CHANGED, DIDN'T WANT TO BE LIKED AS SOMEONE THEY'RE NOT. THEY JUST WANTED TO BE THEMSELF, YET THEY NEVER WOULD'VE BEEN ACCEPTED THAT WAY-

XERO, WHY MUST YOU DO THIS TO ME-

-Stardust

YESSSSSYESYEYSES I DIDN'T TALK MUCH ABT THE TSAMS EP BC I GOT SO DISTRACTED BY MGAFS BUT EVERYTHING U SAID FOR REAL !!!!!! THE BEACH AND THE CONVO THEY HAD AND AAUAGGGHH

I was honestly so worried that there was going to be a sudden change in how Old Moon acted but seeing him just still wholeheartedly be him made me experience sooo many emotions. Like u said, the similarities between him and Eclipse are just wholly on display and it's like,, oh yea! you are who he stems from!

AND YEAH ALL HIS SENTIMENTS ABT MONTY + SUN + THE BROTHER N SISTER HE NEVER GOT TO KNOW. BURSTS INTO TEARS!!!!! For how little people he cared about, he made up for in caring about that small handful of people with his whole entire soul, even if that care could be convoluted and confusing and ultimately hurtful, he never wanted it to be like that. He just wanted the best :(

AND THEN THE LAST MESSAGE FOR NEW MOON AUGHHH I CAN'T EVEN. DIES EVERYWHEREEEE

AND THEN MGAFS. FUCK. I KNOWWWW I KNOW I KNOW IT FUCKED ME UP SO BADDD. THE FINAL BLOODMOON'S DESPERATE YELLING AT THE END FUCKED ME UP EVEN WORSE TO TOP IT ALL OFF I CAN'T EVENNNN.

AND SHAKES YOU SHAKES YOU THEY COULD HAVE BEEN SO EASY TO ACCOMMODATE FOR IT DRIVES ME INSANE!!! THEY WANTED CONTROL OVER THE ONE THING THAT IMPACTS THEM THE MOST, OF COURSE THEY WOULD HAVE DENIED ANYTHING ELSE!!!! THEY COULD HAVE HAD IT ALLLLL AAAAOAUHGHHHH

#asks #anon #stardust anon #STARTS PUNCHING A WALL AND SOUNG BACKFLIPS AND BURSTING INTO TEARS #IT ALL MAKES ME SO EMOTIONAL UGH. HELL EARTH EVERYWHERE FOREVERRRRR #sun and moon show #the sun and moon show #tsams #monty gator and foxy show #the monty gator and foxy show #mgafs #tsams spoilers #sams spoilers #mgafs spoilers #long post #caps

[running-in-the-dark]

sooooo

I'm 32 now

when can I expect to finally grow out of getting obsessed with men people stuff? I'm waiting....

#I doooo not want it #it's embarrassing #can it stop please #BUT also can I not feel depressed and like an empty shell when it's not happening #I mean I can handle it when it's things. hobbies. shows. whatever #sure it usually ends up being expensive as fuck but #at least I don't go around humiliating myself by talking about nothing but a random guy for months on end #how embarrassing! I think a man is hot! I must jump off a cliff immediately #but whyyyy can't I be normal about it at least #other people get obsessed with normal things! like. idk. anything else #soo anyway the opening narration for the texas chainsaw massacre is great isn't it? he did such a good job :) what a nice voice :) I am not #going to be weird about this man any longer :) no I won't! I'm normal about him! I don't want to bite him or chew on his face or anything #like that. just normal things. uh. sex? that's what people usually want. yeah fine that. I mean I do. want. oh I think I'm doing it again #haha no it's fine I just think he's neat (he's the only person on earth no one else exists anymore he's so beautiful oh my god have you seen #his little face he looks like a cute little potato I've never seen anything prettier in my life haha I need to run my hands through his hair #and have you seen how tall he is and he's so cute and I need to. be taken outside and shot. god. #I keep. shrieking. every time I see him. at such a high frequency that it hurts my own fucking ears. because. I can't believe that he exists #I'm. so. stupid!!!! #annnd repeat this every time this happens blah blah blah i should jsut delete this blog right now oh my GOD.

[melangedmess]

Can't wait for Christmas fever to be over it's too exhausting

#Personal #Nothing ever good happens during Christmas #You have your catholic parents and relatives spewing the most atrocious bullshit and u have sit there like 🙎🏻‍♀️ #SHUTUP #I am glad they aren't so uptight abt church & all now at least. #The fact they are converted Christians is hilarious and sad like #Christian missionaries are EVIL and I will never stop yelling about it. If something has to convince you or worse prey when you are the mos #Vulnerable then that's not a religion that's a cult. Especially led by 1 (one) person???? #When that church can only ever talk abt Jesus being killed by the blood thirsty jews. Flat Earth. #or whatever bs u try to cook up. This group of missionaries have been busted on news a lot for being. funded by outside aid to #Convert more people. #I can't believe how brainwashing will have you believe the most weirdest shit. #Altho I'm thankful they weren't converted to Islam because then i wouldn't have the freedom I do now plus the horrible stories I've heard #From ex muslims #What other religion is there anyway who is so bent on converting as many people as they possibly could #To all my friends who have succeeded in leaving behind their families of both these cult-ish religions I love you and I'm glad you're safe. #It still affects me. I can't wait to finally start earning enough to leave this whole chapter behind. I've had enough. #Anyway if you can't tell or simply lack basic comprehension it's not a attack on YOU. It's a world wide phenomenon of conversion and brain #You can't deny that and I'm again NOT blaming you for it. Religious trauma is real. #The gangs or worse family members who will kill you for leaving religions is not something unknown. It's real it's true it's happening. #Anyway

[strwbrymlkshake]

Why can't I be satisfied with everything? It needs to be perfect to me and I can't accept anything otherwise :(

#mine #oh boy here we go. guy last post was about has been pretty cool and i got flustered around him a few times #but i feel bad bc. i need m o r e he isnt insane enough he isnt making me go absolutely crazy i want to be satisfied but im NOT im sorry #like its quite honestly the most attention acceptance etc ive gotten but its not ENOUGH he doesnt die whenever i send a selfie #im never satisfied WHY i have unrealistic expectations !!!! i hate my brain killing and violence and death etc #i get crushes on guys who want nothing to do with me but then when one actually wants me its not enough? what is wrong with me #thrill of the chase? i cant accept being loved? what is it brain. christ almighty. im not doing anything like deliberately yandere related #anymore im just being generally incomprehensibly mentally ill 🙄 still trying to find a therapist but idk how on earth ill explain that #ill update this post tomorrow with more insanity but for now i am the sleepy tired #// ok its now 3 days later i dont feel like making another post. i think i was just having a mental illness moment as always #because he does make me insane. hashtag girl. im trying to be the smartest and calculated i have ever been with a relationship in my life #like im thinkin about it so hard bro. the future n shit. how would this relationship go. im so scared ill do something wrong its preventing #me from doing things RIGHT. im sad becaude i flipped out today over even imagining him being upset with me a little #so i was really embarrassed and it put me in a weird mood for the rest of the night but he reassured me he doesnt hate me or want me to die #every one aaalways says theyre different. i can only hope this one is telling the truth. i dont know what ill do if he isnt. #well i need to stop whining about fictional scenarios and focus on the good stuff in reality. i get along with him very well and he #is very niceys to me :3 he doesnt think im fucking insane or stupid for overreacting. i feel very comfortable gossiping and talking w him #every long time blog viewer of mine reading this like ah shit here we go again #but thats what im here for. i guess. just have to keep doing this shit until something good finally happens to me romantically hngh #i feel so strange because i have wanted and yearned for a relationship but now that i actually could have one im like WAIT #I DIDNT THINK ID GET THIS FAR 💀💀💀 bruh. and he doesnt even think im stupid hes respectful to me he checks in on me all the time #like perhaps the only person to ever actually almost match my energy in a romantic sense. there was [redacted] i guess but he didnt love me #he listens to me talk about my problems he doesnt think i complain or overreact too much. all the ridiculous cringe shit i do #he doesnt mind it. its nice to be able to be myself. and im really proud of myself for not rushing into a relationship right away

[dreamcast-official]

i hate. the scaryfulness

#eli.txt #my heart is racing my arms feel weak i am going to fall on the floor and i dont know if im going to get up #why did i get involved in a conversation about a topic i Knew was just going to remind me of her. why did i do this to myself. #shes fucking dead and the power she still holds over me makes me want to throw up. and i cant talk to anyone about it #no one but me and another friend know shes dead. i cant break that information to anyone i dont know how i would. #everyone. EVERYONE IN MY LIFE was friends with her before they realized who she was. #and i cant blame them for not seeing it. i didnt see it either. #she let me believe i had a choice on the matter. #i dont know what im doing anymore #how can she still hold this power over me when shes not even on this fucking earth anymore #i dont even know if shes actually dead. #i hope she is. i fucking hope she is. #i hope i can stop being scared of going to places i love that she frequented. im losing my mind right now.

[genderfluid-druid]

Hmm.

#hmm #hmmmm #just had a conversation that i have not fully processed yet #which i am currently not feeling any emotions about which canNOT be right #there have gotta be emotions there but i WOULD believe that they are very very very very firmly suppressed #i do think my brain is kind of doing a meta world tilt shift thing right now that may not be perceptible to the mind's eye #kind of like how if the earth itself started slowing down in its rotation it might be hard to tell what the fuck was happening #you see. in the year of our lord 2016 i went through the worst shittiest most devastating breakup of my life #which left me in what we'll just call a Poor Mental State through much of 2017 #and which i only finally clawed out of when i realized i had to stop exposing myself to contact with the ex by unfriending/blocking #which. very healthy choice. should've done that much sooner and i recommend it to anyone in a similar situation #anyway #the crisis dragged on for longer than it should have because ex and i were still trying to be friends when we really really should've. not #we kept driving each other crazy and i was still in love with the guy even though. HAHAHAHAHAHA SHITTY BREAKUP. #so basically my brain was in a constant state of 'i need him to care about me' butting up against 'i am terrified that he doesn't' and #of course that second one became self-fulfilling because i was annoying the shit out of him #crisis finally hit an inflection point when i got it through my head that i just had to accept that i might never be friends with him #that i was gonna have to stop talking to him and let it go #and for the rest of my life assume friendship was not a viable option #and that is how i lived for six years #and he moved to Colorado and got married #and i tried to date some people and hooked up with some others #and that brings us to today #when someone walked up to me at a wedding and said 'oh are you drake? i'm M's friend! didn't you two like date or something?' #🙃 #okay TO BE CONTINUED bc apparently there's a tag limit did you know that? I've never hit 30 tags before. ok one sec

[astrxealis]

one upside of not getting that super much sabotages is that i can use my time sending sabos to others instead of trying to fend for myself

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #⋯ ꒰ა hell on earth ໒꒱ *·˚ #I SAY THIS BUT I STILL DONT FORGET WHAT ALL THE YEAH AND YEHA AND YEAHSHH ........ yk who yall are and ilysm i kid u not #i think in the end i am my biggest enemy ofc but damn its worrisome then whenever ppl enable !!!!!!!!! yeah !!! #like yo dont talk to me about sandalphon or belial or inumaki or dimitri or yuri or felix or hu tao or diluc or anyone okay #like bro its maki i love !!!! why you do this to me bro #altho admittedly it is Honest 2 AM Hours and i am both feelin :( and :) over yeah ^^ but its fine #im glad w who i am and my strength of willpowet and mind !!! but i am also definitely not okay ??? HUH well wtvr not gna talk abt that now #tho srs i am genuinely EXTREMELY grateful to yall who like try to sabo me even slightly oh man #and then wnvr any of my mutuals mention my name it reminds me that oh !! youre talking to like ME me. oh. this is for me (ilysm you have no #idea <33 #9@-6 oAKY okay ill stop raing here now aaaaaaaaa i might sllip and gove myself a strike WHOOPS #nOOOO THIS TURNED INTO SOMEWHAT OF A VENT HU ????? goodbye i shld not be trusted w social media when im feeling this way #and esp at 2 AM FRIDAY !!!! OH MY GOD ASTRIA ARE YOU OKAY HELPFOEJDJWBDJEJJE #i hate tho bcs i wish i cld be more honest w my feelings and i do try my best but i am genuinely pretty tsun haha :'))

[amberwings]

I… feel… like… a… little… zombie!!!

#get ready for a vent… oh boy this will be fun to look back on #i am so tired of being the one who cares more or at all #it is a particular hell to get attached to someone who is incredibly emotionally unavailable #especially when said person made it seem like they were romantic and emotionally available in the beginning #and then u felt crazy for questioning them when all long they never planned on actually wanting anything with you #I have wasted so much time but can’t stop somehow #I just don’t care about other people the way I do for this person whyyyyyyyyy did this have to be how it was #he cares so much about his friends and work and family and just does not feel the way I do #I keep hoping he does deep down but I’m afraid to say it just doesn’t seem like it anymore #who invites someone over then tells them right before bed they have to leave at 9 or 9:30 for breakfast with their friends #after I took the freezing ass metro for him!! and he only invited me last minute cause he decided not to go out with friends cause the cold #like what on earth how did I end up in this????? this is not how it’s supposed to be #and I feel a little sorry for him that he can’t let himself experience something intimate and great he is emotionally shallow #i never would’ve imagined this is how it would be… #I never ever vent ever but I just can’t stop talking about it or this sadness will eat me from inside #I even told my mom!!! #im sick of this… #maybe one day he will regret it but maybe not he is so apathetic it’s so frustrating #it just hurts so much to see that someone you thought you were close to does not value you the same way or appreciate you very much #he meant/means so much to me and now I see I just don’t mean much to him #he doesn’t want to commit to anything and said I’m his friend after leading me on for a LONG time #i turned down other people for him cause he just kept making it sound like once __ happened he’d be ready for a relationship #i was so hopeful :(

[inkskinned]

kids remind me, often, of the things i've taught myself out of.

i have a big dog. he looks like a deer. he is taller than most young children. while we were on a trail the other day, a boy coming our direction saw us and froze. he took a step back and said: "i'm feeling nervous. your - your dog is kind of big."

goblin and i both stopped walking immediately. "he is kind of a big dog," i admitted. "he's called a greyhound. they are gentle but they are pretty tall, which is kind of scary, you're right. their legs are so long because they are made for running fast. i am sorry we scared you. would you like us to stand still while you move past us, or would you feel more safe in your body if we move and you stay still?'

"oh. i didn't know that about - greyhounds. i think i ... i want to stay still," he said. at this point, his adult had caught up to us. "i'm nervous about the dog," he told her, "so i'm - i'm gonna stay still." she didn't argue. she didn't make fun of him. she just smiled at him and at me and held his hand while goblin and i, with as wide of a berth as we could make, crept our way through.

behind us, i heard him exhale a deep breath and kind of laugh - "he was really big, huh? she said it's because greyhounds have to go fast."

"he was big," she said. "i understand why that could have made you a little scared."

"yeah. next time i - next time do you think i could maybe ask to touch him? when - i mean, next time, maybe, if i'm not nervous."

later, going to a work event, in the big city, i stood outside, trembling. my social anxiety as a caught bird in my chest. i took a deep breath and turned to my coworker. she's not even really my friend yet. i told her: "i feel nervous about this. i am not used to meeting new people, ever since covid."

she laughed, but not in a mean way. she said she was nervous too. she reached her hand out and held mine, and we both took another deep breath and walked in like that, interlinked. a few people asked us - together? - and i told the truth: i feel nervous, and she's helping. over and over i watched people relax too, admitting i feel really kind of shy lately actually, thank you for saying that.

the next time i go to an event, and i feel a little scared, i ask right away: wanna hold hands? this feels a little dangerous. i hesitate less. i don't hide it as much. i watch for other people who are also nervous and say - it's kinda hard, huh?

i know, logically, i'm not good at asking for help. but i am also not good at noticing when i need help. i've trained myself out of asking completely, but i've also trained myself to never accept my own fears or excuses. i have trained myself to tamp down every anxiety and just-push-through. i don't know what i'm protecting myself from - just that i never think to admit it to anyone.

but every person on earth occasionally needs comfort. every person on earth occasionally needs connection. many of us were taught independence is the same thing as never needing anything.

each of us should have had an adult who heard - i feel nervous and held our hand and asked us how we could be helped to feel safe. no judgement, and no chiding. many of us did not. many of us were punished for the ways that we seemed "weak".

but here is something: i am an adult now. and i get nervous a lot, actually. and if you are an adult and you are feeling a little nervous - come talk to me. we can hold hands and figure out what will help us feel safe in our bodies. and maybe, next time, if we're brave, we can pet the dog that's passing.

#spilled ink #warm up #so i have worked in childcare as a teacher for like 15 years #hence the language behind ''what helps you be safe in your body?'' #like you can tell by what i say here i have EXPERIENCE with kids. #but tbh the REAL teacher moment is watching a 6/7 year old say #''this makes me nervous #can you please not come closer?'' #as a teacher i was IMMEDIATELY like ... ahh whomever is raising you is doing an EXCELLENT job holy shit #verbalizing your fears? trusting an adult to listen? #ability to recognize a way you might feel safer? #like .... this kid's caregivers.... that one moment... i was like .... who are u i wanna french kiss you big on the mouth

[devilishcupid]

CARBON COPY | Miguel O'Hara

☆ premise: trying to find miles morales in earth-42, he encounters you. or at least, a version of you.

☆ pairing: miguel o'hara x fem!alt universe!reader

☆ warnings: across the spiderverse spoilers, pregnant!reader, clueless!reader, angst, hurt no comfort, miguel's pov, some swearing

☆ a/n: oh my god. across the spiderverse is literally a masterpiece. into the spiderverse already is, but the spiderverse team said, "we can do better." they didn't have to, but they did.

"Do you really think this is a good idea?" Jessica asked through the commlink. "This is risky, even by your standards."

"It doesn't matter. The quicker we find Miles, the quicker we get out of here." Miguel muttered into his earpiece as he walked through the busy streets of Earth-42's New York.

"Yes, but blending in? For all we know, a version of us exists here."

"Which is why you need to stop talking and start looking, Jess." Miguel hissed a little too loud, earning looks from a few passerbys. He winced. Jessica had a point. If a version of them did exist in this universe, it would be best not to bring attention to themselves.

"Miguel!"

And... that was now thrown out of the window. Cursing under his breath, he turned around reluctantly to face the person who called him—only to find that it was you.

His eyes widened, and his lips parted at the sight of you. Never in a million years did he expect to see her again. But here you were, the absolute spitting image of her. Your clothes were exactly the same things she would wear, your hair and makeup done the same way.

Finding different versions of people in different universes was not uncommon. There's literally a society uniting the different universes' own Spider-people, for God's sake. But Miguel didn't expect this. He didn't expect a carbon copy of his dead wife on a universe where Spider-Man did not exist.

He should've said he wasn't Miguel, that you were mistaking him for someone else. Hell, he shouldn't have stopped and turned around in the first place. He didn't know what came over him, but in a second, he had his arms wrapped around your body.

"Miguel, hon, are you okay?" You asked, your voice laced with surprise and concern. You had no clue that the man who was hugging you was not your husband. At least, not your husband in this universe.

Miguel grunted in response, his ability to string words together to form a sentence rendered broken by your presence. He squeezed you tighter. He couldn't believe he was holding you in his arms.

You weren't the same woman he fell in love with. He knows this. But he couldn't help himself. You looked exactly like her. Felt exactly like her. Sounded exactly like her. Shit, you even smelled like her.

"Damn it, Miguel, keep it together! She's not your wife!"

Hearing Jess' voice snapped Miguel out of his stupor. Remembering his mission, why he was there in the first place, he pulled away from you. He didn't want to. He wanted to hold you longer. But he knew that if he did, he wouldn't have been able to stop.

"Honey, what's wrong?" You asked, cupping his face in your hands. God, how he missed feeling the warmth of your palms. "You're acting weird."

"I'm fine, sweetheart." He gave you a small smile, his hands wrapping around yours and his lips pressing a kiss on each of your wrists. "I just missed you, that's all."

You laughed. "What are you talking about? You saw me this morning."

Miguel could only chuckle in an attempt to hide his sadness. What was only hours for you was months for him. "Right. I did."

"Are you sure you're okay, though?" You asked again, eyebrows furrowing and the corners of your lips downturned.

"Don't worry about it, darling. I am."

He wasn't. But you didn't need to know that. You didn't need to know that in another universe, the two of you were married. You didn't need to know that you had a daughter together. You didn't need to know that he loved you and your daughter more than life itself, only for him to lose you both.

"Listen, I have to go. I'm having lunch with a friend. But I'll see you later at Doctor Nguyen's, okay?" You placed your hands on your stomach, a smile forming on your face. "I can't wait to see her again."

Miguel swallowed the lump in his throat before forcing himself to smile. Only now he noticed the bump on your stomach, carrying a different Miguel's Gabriella. "Yeah, me too."

With a kiss goodbye on his cheek, you walked away, blissfully unaware that he was not your Miguel. He watched as you disappeared around the corner, knowing it was the first and last time he was ever going to see you again.

But that didn't matter. He'll find Miles. He'll make sure the canon isn't destroyed. He'll make sure another version of himself wouldn't have to suffer the loss of his family the same way he did. He'll make sure you and your kid were safe.

#˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ doll's fics #miguel ohara #miguel o'hara #spider-man #spiderman #across the spiderverse #across the spiderverse spoilers #miguel ohara x reader #miguel o'hara x reader #spiderman x reader #spider-man x reader #spiderman 2099 #spider-man 2099 #spiderman 2099 x reader #spider-man 2099 x reader #oscar isaac #oscar isaac x reader

[teaboot]

As someone who learnt english as a second language via textbook, I have to say "flying by the seat of my pants" is a hilarious idiom xD

It's the first time I've seen/heard it.

Could you share another one you like using?

Idk about idioms specifically, but there's a bunch of phrases I learned from my mom!

Lord love a duck! (Incredulous, like 'oh my god')

Lord suffer in sheep dip! (Sheep dip meaning sheep poop. Incredulous, but for annoying things- like 'are you kidding me?')

Is there a piano tied to your ass? ('Don't be lazy, do it yourself')

Someone's cruising for a bruising. (You're picking a fight.)

I don't give a rat's rip. ('I don't care'- a rat's 'rip' is it's butt crack.)

Pull up a stump! (Get yourself a chair, sit down.)

Everybody out of the pool! (Get out of the car)

I'm flying by the seat of my pants. (I have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm doing it.)

Don't go blowing smoke up my ass. (Don't over-compliment me, don't flatter me, don't stroke my ego, don't tell me positive lies)

Looks like it's gonna rain on our parade. (A storm is coming.)

Sorry to rain on your parade. (I've given you bad news- can be used sincerely or sarcastically to denote sympathy for incurring a bad mood.)

Better button that lip. (Stop talking.)

Someone's gonna stick a boot up your ass. ('Stick a boot up your ass'- fight you, beat you, kick your ass.)

Stick that lip out any further, and a pigeon'll shit on it. (Stop whining.)

Suck it up, buttercup. (Stop whining.)

Dumber than a fence post. (Very stupid.)

The back forty. (The wild or forested area behind a rural home. The 'forty' being forty acres, or farmland.)

Don't go begging for a fat lip. (Whatever you're saying or doing is going to bother people and get you in trouble.)

What on God's green earth (What the fuck)

I'm sweating like a pig in a porta-potty (like a pig in a plastic outhouse- I'm very warm, it's hot here)

He thinks the universe flew out of his ass. (He thinks he's more impressive than he is.)

Your mouth wrote a cheque your ass couldn't cash. (You promised more than you were capable of providing.)

You've got a horseshoe up your ass. (You're very, very lucky.)

Taking a dirt nap. (Dead.)

Pushing (up) daisies. (Dead.)

Give me forty acres to turn this rig around. (I need time and space to move this large, heavy, or unwieldy thing. Usually about navigating a vehicle. Taken from a song lyric.)

Jesus take the wheel. (God help me, I can't handle this, I give up.)

Gone belly-up. (Has died.)

We've got a floater. (This one is dead.)

Herding cats. (Trying to organize chaos, managing an impossibly complicated situation.)

I've got a black thumb. (I am bad at growing plants, all my plants die- reference to having a 'green thumb', or being good at growing plants.)

Stop trackin' floor cookies. (Floor cookies are bits of animal shit that fall off your work boots- 'tracking floor cookies' means wearing your boots in the house; take your shoes off at the door.)

Running around like a headless chicken. (Frantic, disorganized, stressed out by many tasks or panicked by a big situation.)

Spinning my wheels. (Waiting around for something to happen, getting nowhere, frustrated by inactivity, not making any progress towards a goal.)

He's gonna blow a gasket. (He's going to lose his temper, he's going to be angry.)

They'll tan your hide. (They'll punish you severely; usually through violence. Specifically in reference to a spanking.)

He's a few bricks short a load. (He's not clever / he doesn't think things through / he's crazy)

Not the sharpest tool in the shed. (Not the smartest person. Very dumb, clumsy, or absent-minded.)

I'm not going to bail you out. (Not going to save your sinking boat- not going to help you out of your bad situation.)

Looks like things are going south. (The situation is growing worse.)

I'll start making tracks. (I'll leave now, I'll start working, I'll get going.)

He's fucking the dog. (He's not being productive, he's doing a bad job, he's made things worse, he's screwing around.)

He's making puppies. (Less graphic version of 'fucking the dog'.)

Plant your ass. (Sit.)

Playing grab-ass. (Procrastinating- accomplishing nothing, slowing people down.)

He couldn't find his ass in the dark. (He's stupid, ineffective, underqualified, or incompetent.)

He couldn't pour water out of a boot if the instructions were on the heel. (He is unbelievably, comically dumb or ineffective. He can't do anything right.)

One foot in the ground. (Dying, or half-dead.)

I'm kicking rocks. (I'm not doing anything productive.)

I'm hauling ass. (I'm running away.)

Madder than a wet hen. (Very, very angry.)

Like I said I'm not sure that these are all idioms but they're all the phrases and sayings from my childhood that I can remember right now

EDIT: Cannot BELIEVE I forgot my mom's favourite

52. Wish in one hand, shit in the other, see which gets filled first. (Wishes don't come true by themselves)

Plus some more I forgot:

53. You make a better door than a window. (You're in the way of my view.)

54. You can take a long walk off a short pier. (Go fuck yourself.)

55. He's about as sharp as a bowling ball. (He's stupid.)

56. Scoot your poot. (Move over.)

57. Not my first rodeo. (I know what I'm doing.)

58. He's built like a brick shithouse. (He's broad and sturdy and very strong, solid.)

59. I smell bacon. (I saw a cop nearby.)

60. I don't want to hear a peep. (Stop talking.)

61. You're thinking with the wrong head. (You're making bad decisions because you're horny.)

62. I'd lose my ass/head if it wasn't tied on. (I'm very absent-minded, forgetful.)

63. That went down like a lead balloon. (That situation was bad.)

#Teaboot

[pierregazly]

always the prize, always the winner ꨄ logan sargeant smau

logan sargeant x pop star!reader

in which logan is actually pretty okay with being known as the biggest pop star in the world's arm candy. who would complain about that, really?

yourusername

liked by logansargeant, lilymhe, oscarpiastri, and 4,539,209 others

yourusername back doing what i do best!! (watching this handsome man get asked solely about me in interviews and then singing songs about it) (ps i love you) (pps yes that is a song)

view all comments

logansargeant why are you so obsessed with me?

logansargeant im not complaining btw cause like... never stop?

logansargeant but also pps cant wait to hear it 🤍

yourusername just for this attitude you're the LAST to hear it now (handsome)

username still never gonna understand how LOGAN SARGEANT bagged ms ma'am but okay! 🤭

username a couple mutually obsessed with each other? (gag) (obsessed)

oscarpiastri i get asked questions about you too?

yourusername yes and your one word answers are SO riveting.

username why is no one talking about the SONG??? PS I LOVE YOU???? im going to throw up

username it's going to be the most disgustingly loving obsessive song ever and it's all about this american MAN

username never seen a man luckier than logan sargeant

logansargeant has posted a story

tagged logansargeant

liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, alex_albon, and 3,201,326 others

yourusername nothing makes me happier than running into you in the most random of places. always there when i need you most 🫶🏻

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logansargeant i would meet you in the middle of a croc swamp if i had to

logansargeant not a snake pit though, you're on your own for that one kid

yourusername you're on your own kid... what a song title 🤭

alex_albon we have a race next week??? in australia??? why are you in america

logansargeant 🤫

username god these two make me sick!!! (affectionate)

username if they ever break up... imagine the album ugh. i need it

username maybe let's not wish a breakup on anyone??? especially these two?? wtf

lilymhe begging u to release the songs even if they're about logan

yourusername they're actually about you?? 🫶🏻

tagged logansargeant and yourusername

liked by username, username, username, and others

ynupdates during an interview before the melbourne gp this weekend, logan gushed about finally getting to see yn after a few weeks apart, and when asked if she'd be attending any of the upcoming gp's all he did was smile and say 'she could be here right now, but i'm not going to be the one to expose her?' - so, if anyone is at the melbourne gp be sure to keep your eyes out!

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username oh he SO flew to san fran so she wouldn't have to fly to australia alone.. king energy??

username i know he always says he's the winner but that man would walk through hell for her so idk

username omg omg im gonna be at the gp this weekend!!! i'll keep an extra eye on everything and anything william's

username imagine going to a FORMULA 1 RACE and running into THEE pop star yn

username logan it's your weekend to get some points!!! impress your gf, be the prize and the winner for once!! (at least get points)

yourusername has posted a story

liked by logansargeant, username, username, and others

replies

logansargeant not you posting my garage but not even coming to see me??? hell is a place on earth and it's where i am right now

yourusername literally my words every time im away from you??? go win points love u my handsome lil eagle man <333

logansargeant gross <3

liked by yourusername, alex_albon, oscarpiastri, and others

logansargeant LFGGGGG!! first points of the year, and a 5th place finish at the melbourne gp!! let's go up from here!! honoured to have had my best friend here, always gonna be a winner when you're involved angel 💗

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yourusername literally wreck my plans, THAT'S my man

yourusername so fricken proud of you handsome!!! knew calling you my lil eagle man would win you some points

yourusername love you so much pls

logansargeant love you more pretty <3

williamsracing that's OUR shared comfort american man. it's all up from here!

username LFGGGG

username RAH RAH WTF IS A KM 🦅

username 🦅🦅🦅

tagged logansargeant

liked by logansargeant, lilymhe, oscarpiastri, and 12,320,433 others

yourusername in honour of my boyfriend, my new album 'lover' will be out 24.03.14 - an ode to the man who has shown me how you can be a prize and a winner all in one. logan, i love you more than anything. always.

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logansargeant and to think i always said it was a joke when i asked you to write an album for me.

logansargeant i love you to the moon and back, i know i've heard every song but i can't wait to hear it again. you're the best ever

yourusername god. i'm so lucky to be known as yours lo 💗

oscarpiastri if anyone asks me about this. one word answers only. riveting.

yourusername riveting?

oscarpiastri riveting.

username I KNEW IT

username THERE WAS WAY TOO MANY REFS TO NEW SONGS

username god this is gonna make me feel so single. i literally can't wait.

ynnation love songs for the ages, we know it. an icon, and congrats to logan for getting his first points of the year!!

username this is SO for all the logan haters, ain't none of y'all ever gonna make our girl feel the way he does!!!

authors notes

this was so self-indulgent bc i haven't written in forever but im going through a logan phase. i hope you all love it 💗 i also lost my tag list so pls enjoy regardless ily

#logan sargeant #logan sargeant x reader #logan sargeant imagine #f1 x reader #f1 smau #f1 imagine #logan sargeant smau #smau #f1 #william's racing #my smau #logan sargeant fluff #f1 fluff