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#what this is about of course is that i want So Badly for my loved ones to know that im struggling which is kinda new for me
barcaatthemoon · 3 days
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she's with me || alessia russo x reader ||
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alessia gets jealous when you befriend the new arsenal signing.
alessia's jaw was clenched as she watched you run around with the newest signee. you had been at arsenal for years, long enough to be the unofficial leader of the welcoming party. whenever alessia had signed, you had been the first one at the training grounds to let her into your group. it was customary for you to do with anybody who was new, but this time, alessia was taking it personally.
it wasn't your fault, not really. alessia wouldn't have even gotten upset if katie had unhelpfully pointed out your past relationship with the new player. alessia hadn't even known that the two of you had dated at first, but katie apparently knew all about it. in fact, she had told alessia everything that she could just to fuck with the tall blonde.
"less, babe, do you want to come out tonight with the rest of the girls?" you asked. there was a hopeful look on your face. alessia had been in a piss poor mood, especially around the rest of the girls. it was why you had, admittedly, been avoiding her. the two of you hadn't even been spending all of your normal alone time together because of alessia's behavior.
"of course i do, why wouldn't i?" alessia asked you. she seemed distracted, and you noticed how her gaze was still partially on your ex. it was nice to be friends with her again, despite how badly the relationship had ended. you wanted to explain to alessia that you'd never in a million years get back together with the other girl, but you doubted that alessia would have listened to you.
alessia liked to claim that she was above getting jealous, but you knew different. in fact, the more that you thought about alessia's recent behavior and your newly rekindled friendship with arsenal's new girl, you realized that alessia was jealous. she had been jealous, but instead of saying something and communicating, she had decided to throw a big, stupid tantrum.
"well, with the way you've been lately, i wasn't sure. i thought i'd check. if you weren't going to go, i was just gonna let em give me a ride." you knew that it was wrong, but you couldn't help yourself. riling alessia up was just too easy, and it must have been an irish trait to love doing it because you were sure that katie was at the root of this problem. she had been the only one on the team to know just how mad you had been for your ex.
"damn, if they get any closer, i think we'll get kicked out." alessia's face set into a frown as she looked over to where leah was pointing. there was a group of girls dancing with you, but alessia's eyes zeroed in on the way that your ex held onto your waist. it was far more tame than how katie was grabbing your body as she ground your ass against her hips, but alessia didn't care.
"i should go get her," alessia said. she tried to get up, only to be held back by sab and lotte. "they'll give someone the wrong idea dancing like that. i don't want anybody to think (y/n) and emily are together."
"emily isn't the problem. foord, go get your girlfriend!" leah called out. with katie being pulled away, alessia's attention was forced onto the only person touching you still. she sat there with leah keeping her down for an agonizingly long time. alessia was glad when the song ended and you came over to the table for a drink break.
"less, baby, are you okay?" you asked as you sat down in her lap. she didn't answer you, instead opting to pull you by your hair into a kiss. she knew just where to grab to get you moaning and whining into her mouth. it was a big show, one that had leah pushing the two of you out of the club. "what was that about? i'll tell katie to tone it down next time."
"better yet, tell that other girl to keep her hands off of you. you're mine now. she had her chance, and she blew it. not my fault that your taste improved with age," alessia said. she had never sounded so cocky before. normally, that sort of thing was a huge turn-off for you, but with alessia, you found yourself loving it.
"calm down, like you said, i'm yours now. you don't have to get aggressive with her, okay?" you placed your hand on alessia's chest as the two of you stood outside. she nodded as she took your hand in hers, but that didn't change the look in her eyes as she looked at you.
alessia looked at you like you were going to be her last meal. the intensity of her gaze didn't falter once on the way home. if anything, it seemed to grow in intensity as the two of you got closer to her place. you thought that alessia's stare was going to melt your clothes off by the time that you were walking through the front door.
"get back to the bedroom, i'll be there in a minute," alessia ordered you. there was a moment when you hesitated, prompting alessia to slap your ass as she turned you towards the hallway. you walked forward, cheeks burning red as you did. alessia followed you in a couple of moments later, dropping a couple of water bottles on the bedside table as she made her way over to you.
"are you going to get the strap?" you asked. alessia shook her head as she started to strip out of her clothing. you swallowed thickly as her body was revealed to you, something that never ceased to amaze you. "fuck, less."
"come here and turn around," alessia ordered. she was being very demanding, which you normally would have had a bit of a problem with. instead, you found yourself almost giddy about the way that she was telling you what to do. "your ass looks amazing in this skirt."
"thank you baby," you told her. she placed a gentle hand on your back, pushing the bottom of your crop top as she did. "you looked hot tonight. i wished you would have danced with me."
"this is much better than a dance, i promise. i'm going to make you feel so good, just relax." alessia placed a kiss to the small of your back. you were sure that she could feel how wet you were if she leaned in a little more, but alessia was careful to keep her distance. "can i touch you? i want to have a taste of what's mine."
"fuck less, you can always touch me," you told her. alessia smiled as she pushed your skirt up completely. she kept you bent over as she moved your thong to the side. the hand that had been on your back had moved down to caress your ass as alessia ran her tongue through your folds.
alessia moaned at the taste of you on her tongue. she lapped at your cunt, just trying to make you as much of a mess as she could. alessia didn't care about making you cum quickly, she wanted to tease you long enough to have you dripping down her face. alessia needed the satisfaction of knowing that she could have you coming completely undone on a whim.
"you taste so good," alessia told you as she brushed her thumb against your clit. "makes me clench my thighs to think about sometimes."
"y-you think about me like that?" you don't know why it surprised you so much to hear that. alessia was definitely not as innocent as leah and beth had you believing, but the idea of her thinking of fucking you spun you for a loop.
"all of the time, but i haven't gotten to touch you like this in a while. you've been running away from me because of your new little friend, but i doubted that she ever had you dripping like this. you're making such a mess on my fingers, one that i can't wait to clean up. i swear that i could cum at just the taste of you," alessia said. each one of her words had your stomach clenching. you were so close, but alessia was constantly giving you just enough not to cum.
"lessi, if i beg, will you let me cum?" you asked her. alessia leaned down and bit your ass cheek, causing you to squeal a little.
"you can cum whenever you want once you tell me that you love me." alessia had never been one to withhold your orgasms like that. the two of you had tried edging, but alessia's resolve had broken the moment she noticed tears forming in the corners of your eyes. you weren't on the verge of tears, but you knew that much more teasing would bring you there.
"i love you, alessia. i love you so much that it hurts me sometimes," you told her. alessia stood up and slid two fingers inside of you, pushing her hips in for a little added force. alessia gave you a couple of straight thrusts before she started to curl her fingers inside of you. "less."
"it's okay, i know baby. let it happen. i'll give you whatever you want after. doesn't that sound nice baby? just relax and cum for me," alessia cooed. her voice was soft, much softer than it had been all night. you felt yourself relax as your alessia seemed to be coming back to you.
your orgasm took your legs out from beneath you, but alessia was there to make sure you didn't faceplant on the mattress. she laid you down on the bed and moved to lay behind you. you felt her open up your legs before she started to clean you up. your body jerked and jolted a little, but alessia kept you pinned down.
"i know you're sensitive, but this is important," alessia reminded you. she took care of you, even if you didn't always it. alessia guided you into a seated position for you to drink one of the waters she had brought up. it had been sitting out of the fridge just enough to be deemed "drinkable" by you.
"you know that i do love you, right? you don't have to hold my orgasms over my head to hear it," you said as you shoved her shoulder. alessia nodded sheepishly, having felt a little guilty about it after the words had left her mouth.
"yeah, i know that you love me, and i love you too. it's just been messing with me pretty bad having your ex here, and katie won't stop reminding me about it. it's infuriating, and everything kind of got away from me," alessia ranted. you pulled her into your arms and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "i'm sorry if i've been a bitch."
"you have, but it's okay. i guess you can't be a total sweetheart all the time," you joked. alessia seemed to be glad that you weren't holding her behavior over the past couple of weeks over her head because now that she was back in your arms properly, she felt a bit ridiculous about being jealous in the first place.
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purple-babygirl · 2 days
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in the far corner of the forest V
Pairing: Orc!Bucky Barnes x human!f!reader
Word Count: 7,790 (you love me)
Summary: For the longest time, the kingdom has used Bucky as their number one fighter, forcing him to win their wars for them. The only thing he asked for in return after he was done was that they give him a wife, and they did. They handed him the orphan he picked on a silver platter; it wasn't like anyone would miss her. It would've been perfect if she actually wanted to be there though.
Warnings: 18+ content, mentions of bruised skin, idiots in love, feels, a little crying, a little angst, smut, oral (f receiving), fingering, unprotected p in v (don't do that), multiple orgasms. I think that's all.
A/N: this is the longest part so far and no condolences to the jealous (iykyk) i love and appreciate you guys with my whole heart. also i suck at smut so please pretend to be aroused as you wait for the next part, thank you. please enjoy xx💜💜
~
She wiped her tears away, remembering Bucky’s words as she tried to calm down.
She bit her lip as her chest tightened at the pain she had heard in his voice, deeply regretting her part of the fight.
Did he really think she thought he was without feelings?
She might have seen him as a monster before, but that was in the very beginning when she didn’t know him at all, and she soon came to realize that she was wrong. Very wrong.
Her orc wasn’t a monster by any means. Not even close. If anything, it was the complete opposite. She saw him as a resilient soldier and admired the way he never lost the good things about him at war. To her, Bucky was a warrior; a hero.
Human or not, of course she treasured and cared about his feelings!
Bucky took care of her, brought her gifts without her ever asking, made her feel seen and heard and most of all liked. Loved even. He made her feel like she was some awesome friend worth laughing with and talking to.
She wanted to make sure that she made him feel the same way too. She couldn’t let him continue to believe the words he had said to her.
She opened the door of the cottage and looked outside, but Bucky was nowhere to be found. She sighed, shutting the door again and pressing her back to it as she thought about her next steps.
Life with Bucky was what she wanted, and she wasn’t going to let anything get in the way of that truth.
She fetched the cloth she had tossed away before moving back to the kitchen.
She had only known real happiness alongside Bucky and she was going to let him know that. She was going to whip the cream for that cake even if they had to do without berries.
~
She was almost done smoothing the whipped cream over the cake when she heard the door to the cottage open and close.
She quickly rinsed her hands, ready to go out and make things right.
When she stepped out of the kitchen, however, she was met by the most endearing view she could have ever been met with and it rendered her speechless.
Her large snow orc was standing before her with a blush on his cheeks and a tiny fruit basket between his giant arms.
It was full of mixed berries.
She couldn’t hide her happy surprise as she stared at the sight before her, her mouth opening and closing a few times.
“Bucky?” She finally whispered his name, breaking the silence, her voice soft and laced with love.
Damn, that orc could steal hearts.
“I—  uhh—  borrowed the basket from Sarah,” Bucky muttered, pushing the basket forward for her to take as he avoided eye contact.
He really sucked at this and he knew it, but he was trying. He desperately wanted to make everything better. He knew he couldn’t take the yelling or the bruising back, but he badly needed to fix what he had so stupidly ruined, and the berries were his best bet.
She appreciatively took the basket out of his hand, hugging it to her chest.
“I’m sorry if they’re not as good as the ones you picked. It’s— it’s my first time uhm— picking berries,” Bucky admitted lowly, gesturing with his hands as his eyes wandered anywhere but on her, afraid of meeting her eyes and finding them disappointed or fearful still.
It was true. It was his first time doing any of this. Bucky was a rough orc. He did hunting, not foraging.
“They’re perfect,” she replied without even looking at the fruits, the gesture itself enough for her as she realized that under all this beef, her orc had hid a heart of gold and a softness to die for.
Bucky only nodded awkwardly, still unable to meet her eyes. He didn’t know how to act or what to say.
He was a soldier. He used to give orders and expect results, he didn’t do apologies or pluck raspberries as gently as possible in order not to squish them between his huge fingers.
She silently took the basket to the kitchen, a smile covering her face as her heart jumped.
Bucky walked in after her, leaning on the door frame and watching as she emptied the berries in a bowl and washed them.
For a moment, neither of them spoke, the weight of their earlier argument hanging heavy in the air.
“How’s your arm?” Bucky asked softly, swallowing in the fear of having left some serious damage on her.
Her smile faltered for a second when she remembered the way he had so harshly grabbed and held her, “it’s gonna be okay. Just a tiny bruise.” She reassured still, not wanting him to feel bad anymore.
Bucky’s fingers trembled as he ran a rough hand through his unkempt hair, the weight of his actions weighing heavily on his conscience.
“I hurt you,” he said, his voice thick with remorse. “I shouldn't have grabbed you like that. I really am sorry, little human.” Bucky sincerely apologized again.
Before she could reply, he stepped closer, taking hold of her hand before lowering his lips to her forearm.
The feeling of Bucky’s tusks ever so softly digging into her skin as Bucky left tender kisses all over the abused area made her shiver.
“I’m sorry; I’m a fool,” Bucky said into her skin as he pressed another kiss, “I’m an idiot. I’m so sorry.” He pressed one final kiss before letting her arm go, “I will never doubt you again, sweet thing. Please forgive me.”
He stood there with the bluest puppy eyes, silently begging for her clemency as his hands hugged hers.
“I forgive you, Bucky.” She nodded with a shy smile, her own guilt gnawing at her insides as the fire that had rose on her skin in the wake of Bucky’s lips dissipated.
“It scared me when I came home and didn’t find you. I— I thought you were leaving me again.” He confessed lowly, “I didn’t know what to think.”
“I know. I should’ve at least left a note,” she thought out loud, her head down in regret, “I thought I would be home before you arrived so I didn’t feel the need to write one. I’m sorry, Bucky.” She gave his hand a desperate squeeze, “I really didn’t mean to scare you or make you feel like I was running away.”
“It’s okay.” Bucky smiled softly, regretting how poorly he had reacted as he brought her hand to his lips.
She was amazing. His night’s firefly.
“I don’t think of you as someone who doesn’t have feelings, Bucky,” she blurted out, her voice quivering with sincerity. “The kindness you show me... it's unlike anything I've ever known from humans. It's genuine, and real, and it's the reason I wanna be with you.”
Bucky listened in silence, an appreciative smile breaking on his handsome face.
“I care about you, Bucky, and I respect your feelings more than you know. I’m sorry if I made you feel like I didn’t.”
“I didn’t want to keep you when you didn’t want to stay, but it still hurt every time you left,” Bucky finally voiced his thoughts, sharing a part of his feelings and fears with her.
“Who—” She stopped to clear her throat, “who said I don’t wanna stay?”
“So you wanna be here for good? With me?” Bucky’s eyes lit up with hope as he intently watched her.
“Well, I made a cake, didn’t I?” She wouldn’t let her eyes meet his as she placed the berries on top of the smooth cake, her heart drumming in her chest.
“Let me hear it, sweet thing,” Bucky begged, unable to believe what he was hearing from her despite everything that has happened.
“I thought I’ve said it before,” she tried to tease, “and I’m wearing your ring, Bucky,” she chuckled shyly, her face hot.
Bucky kept waiting, wordlessly pleading her to tell him the words he so badly needed to hear.
She looked at him and saw passion drawn all over his face and she could only imagine she looked the same.
“I… wanna be here… with you, Bucky, for good,” she said before biting her lip, her own admittance sending a shudder down the back of her hot neck.
The simple sentence hit Bucky like a warm cup of cocoa on a stormy evening as he smiled.
He grabbed her hand and gave the palm of it a long kiss, getting berry residue on his cheek.
Thankfully, she didn’t take her hand away, giggling softly as her orc got his skin stained.
She smiled timidly when he pulled away, wiping his cheek clean with her other thumb.
“I know I haven’t made it easy for you, Bucky, but you’ve got to trust me. I don’t wanna leave you, not now, not ever.”
Bucky nodded, his heart soaring at the reassurance, “I trust you, little human.”
“Let’s eat our cake?” She asked, biting her lip.
Our. It was the first time she has ever used that word.
Bucky nodded with a grateful smile of his own, carefully carrying the cake out to the table outside.
She grabbed plates, forks and a knife and followed him.
Her heart was beating like crazy, yet it was the most relieved it had ever been now that they have made up.
She handed Bucky the knife and he cut through the cake.
She took the chance that he was busy and leaned forward to kiss his cheek, her lips lingering against his warm skin for a fleeting moment, “welcome home”.
Bucky could feel his chest burning up with the love it held for her.
For years, he had believed himself unworthy of love, of kindness, of anything resembling happiness. But in that short second with her lips on his cheek, he felt a twinkle of hope ignite within him, dispersing the darkness that had cloaked his heart for years.
The commotion that happened earlier had made him forget all about his kiss, but she didn’t.
She kissed him and with a smile too.
Bucky was love-sick, her gentle features stirring unparalleled emotions inside of him, softening his rough edges without even trying.
With a hesitant hand, he reached out to cup her cheek, his thumb brushing against the smooth skin in a silent promise of devotion. And as she leaned into his touch, cupping his hand with her tiny one, Bucky took an oath to cherish her, to protect her, and to love her with every fiber of his being for as long as he lived.
“Is there anyone around left from your tribe that I can meet?” She asked after Bucky had filled their plates with cake, interested to know more about her husband’s life as she handed him his fork.
She couldn’t help her curiosity anymore. She cared about Bucky and she needed to know why he was out here on his own. Where was his clan? Did he even have one? Do they know about her?
“No, just the two very close human friends,” Bucky sighed his answer before slipping a raspberry in his mouth, his thoughts running to his clan; the clan that had rejected and abandoned him years ago.
Okay, but where were the orcs? Now she was more curious and confused.
“What about your family?”
“You’re my family,” Bucky answered without hesitancy and she felt her heart flood with love as she speechlessly stared at his face.
“Where did you see me?” She wondered aloud, her tone hushed as she ached to know how and when he got to choose her.
“At the orphanage,” he started, a smile already spreading on his face as he recalled the memory, “me and Sam were delivering chairs and a few beds for the new rooms they had built.”
She listened, knowing exactly what he was talking about. She was part of the group that was instructed to clean the new building.
“I had just taken a bed down from the truck when I felt something drop on my head and before I knew it, it was raining. I was wiping the raindrops off my forehead.” Bucky’s fork played around with the berries on his plate before he looked up and into her eyes, “and I let my arm down and there you were, breathtaking as a daydream, laughing with another girl as you both ran inside before the rain could catch you.”
“How did I not see you?” She whispered, eyes welling up at the adoration she could see in his gaze.
“You were too busy being scared of the rain,” Bucky teased, “but I saw you.” Bucky’s thumb stroke drown her cheek, “I saw you and I knew I just had to see you again.”
“So that was when you asked the manager if I could be your wife?” She bit her lip, the thought now flattering to her rather than appalling as it used to be.
“No, that was when I intentionally slammed a chair down on the concrete and broke it to pieces so we could be one chair short and I could come again and hopefully sneak another peek at you.” Bucky laughed, remembering Sam’s reaction as he watched the chair he had so carefully put together get smashed down, “Sam wasn’t so happy about me destroying his work”.
“Oh my gods,” she laughed with him, feeling bad for poor Sam.
“Yeah, he didn’t believe me when I said I dropped it, swore he wasn’t coming with me that next time and everything. It was a whole thing.” Bucky shook his head as his laughter faded into a soft smile.
“Can’t blame him.” She shrugged with a grin.
“He was fine.” Bucky waved his hand in the air, “I honestly only cared that I’d secured myself a chance to come back.” He admitted unapologetically.
“And did you see me when you came back?” She asked, her elbow on the table and her cheek resting on her hand, cake long forgotten.
“Yeah, I had to sneak to the back to see you, but I did. You were even more beautiful that day,” Bucky told her, making her blush under his affectionate gaze, “you had a messy flower crown on top of your head and you were taking laundry down from the clothesline. You were so focused as you tried to pull the clothes down without getting on your tiptoes,” he chuckled, recalling how cute she was as she struggled to reach the peg clips.
“Hey! They hung that clothesline way too high! No one could reach it!” She shook her head.
“Yeah, I’m sure they couldn’t,” Bucky teased, laughing at her defensive reply.
“They couldn’t, I swear! Not just me!”
“I believe you,” Bucky said with a provocative smile.
“You’re annoying.” She pouted, digging her fork in her cake slice.
“Nah, you’re just too little, little human.” Bucky teased again and she couldn’t help her smile.
It was all making sense now as she admired his gorgeous grin: the yearning for Bucky’s touch when he wasn’t there, the longing for his presence that had replaced her previous fear or repulsion, and the way she so desperately looked forward to the weekends so they could hold hands as they walked and talked could only mean one thing.
She was in love. She was in love with Bucky and she didn’t want to run from that feeling.
“I— I think I’m in love with you,” she admitted in a tiny whisper.
A smile lit Bucky’s face up before he gave her forehead a long kiss, trying to convey his adoration for her as he held her close to him, “I know I’m in love with you, little human.” He sighed in her hair.
He couldn’t believe she said it and he couldn’t believe she said it first. He couldn’t believe how far they have come and how beautiful life could be.
But he knew now and he wouldn’t trade it for the world.
Bucky finally had someone who loved him and cared about him; someone he could trust and surrender his heart to.
She stood on her tiptoes, making him chuckle as she wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him so close that he could feel her heartbeat.
“They renounced me a long time ago,” Bucky whispered in her hair, feeling brave enough to open up to her about his past.
Her heart sank at the gut-wrenching piece of information.
“What?” She pulled away in shock, “why?”
Her mind couldn’t wrap itself around the idea of a clan having Bucky and willingly letting him go.
“My mother was a human; wanted to name me James, but she died during my birth, heart condition,” he started, closing his eyes to stop his tears from forming, “they eventually did name me James, but I think I never liked it. My grandma gave me the name Bucky, from my middle name ‘Buchanan’. She was the one who raised me because me and my father weren’t close. He could never forgive me for taking my mother away from him, I guess.” Bucky shrugged, swallowing his emotions.
She listened silently, her own tears brimming. What kind of father does that? Bucky had already lost his mother and instead of being there for him, his father made him lose him too?!
“Before I knew it, I’m a teenager and my father had passed away and my grandma before him… I had no one left and my cousins weren’t about to let the half-orc with the human mother become chief.” Bucky sighed as he recalled the events of his youth.
She stayed in his arms, hands on his chest as she listened closely, her heart breaking at the expression on her orc’s face.
“And when I started ‘working with the humans’, they found the perfect reason to kick me out of the clan for good.” He finished with a sad smile, shaking his head as if to shake the memories away.
“That was when you started fighting for the kingdom?” She asked, softly running the back of her fingers down Bucky’s cheek as a tear rolled down her own.
“Had nowhere else to go.” Bucky shrugged with a teary smile, trying to pull himself together.
“But that was where you met Sam, right?” She reminded with a tender smile, her thumb tracing his stubbly chin.
Bucky nodded with a chuckle, “yeah, used to drive me crazy at first, but he was a good soldier; an even better friend.”
“And then you opened your shop.” She tilted her head, her fingers catching the tips of Bucky’s soft hair by his shoulder.
“Yeah.” He closed his eyes, reminiscing at how things have turned out.
“And you started making beautiful furniture that you needed to deliver to the orphanage, where you saw me.” She grinned fondly, a fingertip tracing the orc’s nose.
“Yes.” Bucky sighed, his love pouring out of his dewy eyes as he enjoyed the light touches.
“And now I’m here with you, in our home,” she brought both palms to Bucky’s cheeks, “and I will never leave you, Bucky,” she told him seriously before getting on her tiptoes to hug him again, “I’m your family and you’re mine.” She whispered into his neck.
“I love you,” Bucky whispered into her shoulder, his arm squeezing her to him as if he wanted to meld himself to her.
“Copycat,” she joked, instantly feeling her orcs chest vibrate with a chuckle, “I love you too, Bucky.”
With her in his arms, hers wrapped around him as tight as she could, Bucky could then understand the meaning of safety, of love and family.
And she finally came to realize that she and Bucky weren’t all that different after all. They had both been abandoned by the ones who were supposed to have their backs before and more than anyone. But they have got each other now. She wasn’t going to let Bucky go and she trusted him not to let her go either.
~
As she leaned in to give Bucky his goodnight kiss that night, a different thought occupied her mind.
Sitting up against the pillows, she crossed her legs, her heart pounding with anticipation as Bucky looked at her with a quizzical tilt of his head.
She slowly got closer to his face, locking eyes with him to gain more courage, but it only made her more nervous.
She took a deep breath and when she pressed her lips, she pressed them to her orc’s mouth instead of his cheek, ever so tentatively getting a much needed taste of his full lips. They were so soft, so perfect.
She had no idea if she was doing this right, but she didn’t care.
Bucky's eyes widened in disbelief, wondering if he was dreaming.
She pulled away after a short second, scared that she might have crossed a line, “I’m sorry. Do orcs not do that—”
Before she could apologize or question her actions further, Bucky silenced her with a kiss of his own, swiftly bringing her down to lay on her back as he hovered over her, his kisses eager and desperate as he tried his best to watch his tusks.
“I don’t care what orcs do. We’re doing it,” he mumbled against her sweet lips.
Bucky allowed her one loud laugh before devouring her lips again, stealing her heart and breath with another tender, yet deep kiss.
In that very moment, time seemed to stand still for Bucky. All he could feel was the warmth of her cheek against his palm, all he could taste was the sweetness of her lips mingled with the faint flavor of berries, and he never wanted it to end.
As she allowed his tongue to gently explore her mouth, a promise of eternity passed between them in a moan, sealing their bond with a promise of a lifetime of love and devotion.
She has never had a real friendship. Rarely had anything to say. She would rather stay silent if she thought she didn’t have anything to contribute to the conversation. She was always afraid that others might find her boring, and was even more afraid that that may be her truth. So she always hid. She hid from others, from herself and her feelings. She hid from problems and fights. She hid from anything that could get her hurt.
But with Bucky it was different.
She didn’t have to hide anymore, didn’t have to be scared because in Bucky she had everything. She had a true friend, a loyal lover and a great husband.
And as she let herself drown in the feeling of his lips, she couldn’t be more grateful for the gods above for drawing her fate exactly how it was.
It felt so good to belong to Bucky and she could all but want more.
She let her instincts run wild, her body hot with need as she hesitantly slipped her hands under Bucky’s sweater, eager to feel his scarred skin under her fingers.
Bucky pulled away from her lips to look her in the eyes, his breath stuttering at her tender touch, “what are you doing, sweet thing?”
“I’m sorry. Was that too far?” She hurriedly tried to pull her hands out of his clothes, but Bucky was faster as he sat back and held his hands on top of hers, keeping them inside his sweater, right on his ribs.
“I’m your husband,” Bucky reminded with a sweet smile.
“I know— I just— I’ve never—” She struggled with her words as heat rose to her face, “I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable… but I think I wanna do this.” She confessed shyly, her indexes caressing up and down his abdomen.
“This this?” Bucky tilted his head suggestively, already feeling his cock jump at the thought alone.
“This this.” She smiled, biting her lip shyly as she gave a nod.
“Little human, you better not be playing right now.” Bucky warned, his eyes growing the slightest bit darker.
“I’m not—”
“Because if I start, I won’t be able to stop myself, sweet thing.”
“Then don’t.”
Her newfound courage took over as she brought Bucky back to her with her hands tangled in his pullover.
Bucky kissed her with fervor, savoring the angelic sounds she was making as his tongue tasted hers.
He carefully ran a large hand up her hip, exploring as his lips trailed down her cheek and to her neck.
He could feel her pulse again and was about to stop, déjà vu from their wedding night attacking him, but then she said his name in the softest, sexiest and neediest tone as she squirmed underneath him, his covered cock fitting just right between her legs.
Bucky could all but put his lips back on her, his tusks grazing the sensitive skin as he nibbled on it.
“Can I see you?” He breathed, his eyes on hers as his fingers found way under the skirt of her dress.
She nodded, her face and neck flushed as she sat up and gave the orc her back.
Bucky wasted no time working the zipper down, revealing the back of her bralette to his hungry eyes.
She twisted herself back, seeking Bucky’s blue orbs for reassurance as she pushed her dress down her shoulders. Her heart pounded in her chest when she saw Bucky literally lick his lips at the sight of her.
It felt like it was the first time Bucky was seeing her naked to both of them.
He saw her hesitate with pushing the dress down further and so with a smile, Bucky pulled his own pullover up and off his head, “I got you.” He promised.
She bit her lower lip, pushing the dress down her thighs.
Bucky pulled the piece of clothing all the way down, throwing it behind his back with his discarded sweater. He kept his calloused palms on her shins, caressing the smooth skin while he watched her hands go behind her back to unhook her bralette.
She let it fall from her body, her chest rising and falling with her heavy breaths as she watched Bucky’s gaze switch from admiration to sheer desire.
“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered, gently bringing her on her back, taking the bralette all the way down her arms as he pressed his mouth to hers again.
Bucky’s lips traced down the hot skin of her throat in open-mouthed kisses, moving to her collarbones, “can I touch you, sweet thing?”
“Yes.” She nodded and goosebumps instantly rose on her skin as Bucky’s palms cupped her breasts, his thumbs brushing her hardening nipples.
“Bucky,” she moaned, her back involuntarily curving as she pushed herself further into her orc’s touch.
“Oh, you sensitive on here, little human?” Bucky asked, biting back his smirk as his calloused flesh thumb rubbed over her nipple again, “’s my touch making your little nipples hard?”
“Bucky,” she whined at the dirty talk, her hands coming up to cover her hot face in embarrassment.
“Hey.” Bucky gently took her hands away from her face, “don’t hide from me, sweet thing. I love that your body is reacting to me.”
Before she could whine again, her husband was bringing her right hand down and between his legs, pressing her open palm to his hard cock, “this is my body reacting to you, my love.”
She gasped, the feeling foreign to her as she felt how big and hard Bucky was.
“This is what you do to me, little human.” Bucky wrapped her smaller hand around his clothed cock, giving himself a squeeze, making wetness pool in her panties at the sound that left him afterwards.
Knowing that she wasn’t the only one whose body was on fire, made her the tiniest bit more confident and she found herself giving Bucky’s cock another squeeze, making his head drop to her shoulder.
“Oh, fuck, you tryna kill me, sweet thing?” Bucky breathed a chuckle on her neck.
“Did— did I hurt you?” She asked insecurely, wanting to remove her hand and bury herself under the bed.
“Gods, you’re an angel.” Bucky shook his head and she didn’t understand until he said, “you have no idea how much your touch drives me mad, do you?”
She shook her head innocently and Bucky only smiled, moving his mouth to her chest, his tusks softly grazing everywhere his lips went.
“It’s something like this.”
“Ohhhh, Bucky!” She arched her back again as her orc wrapped one of her nipples in his lips, softly suckling at the tender nub, making her hand give a tighter pump to his cock.
She really was sensitive there.
Bucky groaned, moving to her other nipple, the vibration driving her crazy, making her squirm harder as her hand massaged around his cock, sliding up his back to unconsciously wrap in his long hair as she pushed her breast into his mouth.
She could feel herself clenching like crazy down there, her whole body aflame with lust from all the new sensations Bucky was introducing her to.
The way the tip of his tongue flicked against her nipples made her crave more.
Bucky’s kisses trailed down her ribs to her abdomen, worshipping every inch until they settled on top of her pubic bone, dark blue eyes looking up at her for permission to go further.
She nodded, aching for her orc’s touch to provide any kind of relief.
A little nervous about not finding her wet once again, Bucky moved closer to her center.
Bucky let his lips kiss her on top of her underwear first, inhaling the saturated fabric as he pressed a long kiss to her clothed core. He swallowed hard, her scent filling his nostrils and making him dizzy with desire.
She smelled so good.
“Bucky, please,” she pleaded before she could stop herself, desperate for him to do anything to help the throbbing between her legs.
“I got you, sweet thing,” Bucky told her again, quickly pushing the tiny underwear down her legs and getting himself comfortable between her legs.
He took a second to look at her, all naked and all his, writhing from and for his touch and his touch alone.
“Wh— what are you gonna do?” She asked uncertainly, not really getting why Bucky was bringing himself lower between her open thighs, eye to eye with her pussy, the position making her cheeks burn up.
“I’m gonna get a taste, little human. Would you let me? Can I get a taste of you, sweet thing?” Bucky asked as he pressed loving kisses to the delicate flesh of her inner thigh.
“You’re… gonna put your mouth there?” She whispered her question shyly, the thought making her want to close her legs and hide.
Bucky just smiled lovingly at her innocence; his untouched, pure little human, “if you let me.”
“Is it gonna feel good?” She asked curiously.
Bucky nodded, relieved she wasn’t scared of his tusks coming close to where she was the most sensitive, “I’ll make sure of it.”
“Y—yes. Okay.” She nodded, swallowing her nervousness as she laid her head back.
Bucky knew what he was doing and she trusted him to take care of her.
Her permission was all Bucky needed to put his mouth on her, pressing a longing kiss to her lower lips, glad to find her soaking wet, making her gasp above him. The feeling of his blunt tusks framing her pussy set her heart racing.
He then locked eyes with her as he let his tongue out, licking a slow, deliberate stripe up from her dripping hole to her pulsing clit before wrapping his full lips around it and she couldn’t help the tiny squeal that escaped her as her head fell back on the pillow, her hips pushing down against him
Bucky smirked on her heat before moaning himself. She tasted so good, better than anything he has ever put his mouth on.
He had fucked humans before and he knew exactly what to do, but she was different. Every breath she released, every moan, was making Bucky wild with desire. He has never cared about making someone feel good as he did in that moment with her thighs around his head.
Her delicate hands flew to her orc’s hair and she tugged hard, losing herself in the feeling of Bucky’s mouth on her pussy as she arched her back and pushed herself closer to his lips. Her orc’s touch was reducing her to a moaning, babbling mess in mere seconds.
Bucky decided to test the waters a little, slipping his tongue inside her hole a few times, tasting her sweetness from the source before bringing his flesh finger between her legs. He gently prodded the tip of his thick finger at her entrance, feeling her tense above him with a gasp.
“It’s okay, sweet thing, I got you. Just relax for me.” He reassured and she tried her best to relax her muscles, allowing Bucky to ease the tip of his finger insider of her.
Fuck, she was so tight; the tightest he has ever felt and it made him rut into the mattress when he thought about how tight she was going to feel around his cock.
Her mouth hung open as Bucky worked the thick digit into her pussy knuckle by knuckle, his lips sucking on her clit.
“I gotta open you up for my cock, little human.” Bucky couldn’t help but tease her, smirking when she whined, getting wetter on his finger.
Bucky started moving his finger in and out of her, his movements slow and deep as he tried to explore as much of her as his finger would go.
Her body was feverish with arousal and her mind was drunk on the feeling of being filled for the first time in her life as sighs and whimpers slipped from her lips without her permission.
It was just one finger pushing in and out of her cunt and she was feeling full already, clenching hard with her juices drenching her thighs and the sheets. She clenched harder around Bucky’s thick finger at the thought of how big his cock would feel and how full it would make her feel, the way he was suckling on her clit making a knot tighten in her lower stomach.
She has never felt anything like this before and was starting to panic at the sensation spreading from her pussy to the rest of her.
“Bucky, I— I feel weird,” she whined, yet ground harder on her orc’s thick finger.
“Are you in pain, little human?” Bucky asked worriedly, taking his touch and mouth away from her at once.
“No, no, no, why would you stop?” She whined louder, her glossy eyes opening and pleading him to give her her pleasure back.
“Oh.” Bucky smirked when he looked from her eyes to her pussy and saw her clamp around nothing, “oh, sweet thing, you were gonna cum?” He asked lowly, his index rubbing up and down her sopping hole without going in.
“I— I don’t know.” She writhed, her hips pushing down as she tried to take Bucky’s finger back inside her, “Bucky, please.” She begged despite not really knowing what she was begging for.
But Bucky knew. He knew and he was going to give it to her.
“I got you,” Bucky said as he pushed his finger back into her pussy with ease, “you think you can take another one, little human?”
“Yes.” She nodded, her answer breathy and desperate as she automatically opened her thighs wider.
“Gods, you’re perfect. So good for me, sweet thing.” Bucky took his index out before coupling it with his middle and pushing both fingers into her, stretching her once more.
She whimpered at the careful intrusion, her hand bringing Bucky’s face to her pulsing clit, making him smirk proudly at how needy she was being for him.
If she thought she felt full before, this made her realize she was wrong.
Bucky’s fingers were so thick, so skilled as they massaged and curled against her upper walls, making her squeal when they nudged a specific spot deep inside her.
“Oh, there you go,” Bucky groaned into her clit, knowing exactly what he was doing to her as he kept curling his fingers inside of her, harshly stimulating the spot that was making her thrash.
He could feel her walls contracting harder around his fingers and he wanted to watch as he brought her to her first orgasm ever.
Keeping his eyes on her blissed out face, Bucky replaced his mouth with the heel of his left hand, circling her clit tightly with his cooler palm.
She wailed at the new stimulation, the pressure from Bucky’s hand strong enough to rub both her clit and her lower abdomen.
Her loud whimpers were making Bucky’s cock leak in his pants as her fingers dug into his shoulders.
“I got you, sweet thing. Give it to me, my love. Shake on your orc’s fingers.”
Bucky’s words did it for her.
She felt the knot in her tummy tighten once more and before she could tell him about it this time, her toes were curling and her body was trembling as her pussy clenched and pulsated around the orc’s beefy digits.
Bucky watched with an open mouth, his lips shimmering with the remnants of her arousal as he almost finished in his pants like a teenager at the mere sight of her losing it on his fingers, “there you go, my love. Good job, sweet thing.”
He slowed down the curling of his fingers but kept his palm circling her clit, wanting to keep her convulsing for as long as he could before she gently tried pushing his touch off.
“Sensitive,” she panted and Bucky decided to have mercy on her.
She laid down on the bed, her tired body limp despite the ongoing throbbing of her pussy, trying to catch her breath.
A smile automatically formed on her lips as she felt Bucky climb up the bed again, mapping his way up her body in wet kisses.
“Hi,” she whispered, opening her eyes when she felt him kissing the corner of her lips.
“Hi.” Bucky smiled, more than satisfied with himself at the state he had managed to bring her to as he kissed her lips, making her taste herself on his tongue, “did you like that, sweet thing?”
She nodded coyly, “can I… make you feel like that too? With my mouth?” Her face was flushed, heat spreading on her skin as if she hadn’t just come on Bucky’s fingers.
The orc could barely hold his orgasm back at the innocence in her voice as she asked if she could suck his cock in the purest way possible. He wasn’t about to cum untouched during his first time with his human. Get it together dammit.
“Later, sweet thing. Right now, I need to be inside your pussy or I think I might die.”
“Bucky,” she whined shyly, covering her face with her hands.
He laughed at her bashfulness before removing the rest of his clothes, “look at me, little human.” Bucky urged gently, his touch soft as his thumb stroked her lower belly.
She removed her hands, eyes instantly landing on his huge cock as it stood proudly, leaking pearls of pre-cum down his length.
“Are you ready, little human?” Bucky asked, wanting to make sure she wanted this.
She remained wordless for a second, taking in Bucky’s cock with an open mouth, wondering if it was going to fit.
“You can say no, sweet thing. We don’t have to do it tonigh—”
“Yes,” she interrupted with a nod, “make me yours, Bucky.”
Bucky bit his lip, stifling a groan, trying to stop himself from sliding home and pounding her into the mattress.
“I thought you were already mine, little human.” He growled lowly, rubbing the tip of his cock up and down her soaking cunt, tapping her clit teasingly just to see her shiver.
“I am. But I wanna be yours like this too.” She mumbled, her eyes mesmerized as she watched Bucky lube his cock up in her wetness, “wanna be yours in every way possible.”
“Can’t say no to that,” Bucky growled before carefully popping the tip of his fat cock inside her aching pussy.
Her breaths were coming out in short pants, cunt already clenching around him and he almost doubled over, his knees weak as pleasure engulfed his senses, “fuck, sweet thing, you’re so tight. Pussy’s tryna kill me.” He moaned, unintentionally making her clench down harder.
She looked like she had already been fucked stupid when Bucky proceeded to push half of his fat cock inside her, letting out tiny mewls and whines as she felt every ridge and vein on her orc’s cock, holding onto his arms for dear life.
“Oh, you feel so good, my love. So wet for me,” Bucky sighed as he kept fucking her with half of his cock, wanting her to get used to the stretch before he could give her all of him, “so tight”.
“Please, Bucky,” she moaned, her heart and pussy simultaneously fluttering at Bucky calling her his love yet again, “I can take it.” She promised, opening her thighs as far as they would go for him.
Bucky could all but snarl hungrily as he leaned forward, burying his face in her soft neck before gradually pushing the rest of his cock inside her tight throbbing cunt inch by inch until he had bottomed out.
He took a second to calm himself down, not wanting to burst so fast. Then he was pulling out just enough for his bulbous tip alone to remain inside of her before sliding back into her cunt, gasping into her neck at the sensation of being totally wrapped up in her snug warmth.
She couldn’t help but cry out at the pleasure as he orc fucked her deeply, reaching places inside of her she never knew existed.
She thought it would take longer for her body to get used to Bucky’s girth, but it was like she was made for him, her pussy effortlessly accepting him every time he pressed back home.
The tip of Bucky’s cock easily found her special spot, ramming into it over and over every time he drove himself back into her heat.
“Oh, Bucky!” She squealed, her back already bowing once more as her vision got blurrier and Bucky knew he wasn’t going to last much longer when her nails dug into his skin again.
His breath was labored when he raised his head, wanting a taste of her lips as his thrusts became faster, more desperate. He swallowed her loud moans, leaving the only sound in the empty cottage to be the sound of skin slapping against skin as he fucked her faster.
“Bucky, it’s gonna happen again,” she whined and Bucky brought his hand down to her clit at once, wanting to see and feel her crumble on his cock.
“Yeah? You gonna cum on my fat cock, little human?”
She nodded frantically, her legs wrapping around Bucky’s waist.
“Cum for me, sweet thing. Let me feel your tight little pussy cum on my cock.”
Bucky’s dirty whispers in her ear, his deep thrusts and his frantic rubbing on her sensitive clit were making her lose control; making her lightheaded with desire as she let herself go again, full body tensing before shaking in her orc’s arms.
Bucky could no longer hold back, his guttural growl making her clench hard. He gave a few more thrusts before pushing his cock as deep as it would go inside her quivering pussy, keeping his assault on her clit going to keep her clenching around him. He felt his cock twitch as he emptied his balls inside her. His cock wouldn’t stop throbbing as he filled his little human up with his hot cum.
Before any of them could comprehend it, she was cumming again just at the feeling of Bucky cumming inside of her, making him groan as her walls squeezed his cock, milking him for all that he was worth.
He let himself collapse on top of her for just a minute before feeling the need to pull out because she wouldn’t stop pulsating and shuddering around his sensitive cock.
Bucky didn’t think he had ever cum so hard in his entire life.
A smile spread on his lips as he flipped on his side, watching her chest rise and fall with her slowing breaths.
He trailed a finger up her still slightly trembling thigh, making her open her tired eyes to look at him.
She gave him a sweet smile, biting her lip as she squirmed, timidly closing her thighs and Bucky could see the exact moment she realized that his cum was leaking out of her abused hole, smirking at how bashful she got straightaway.
“Are you okay, little human?” Bucky asked, his finger tracing up her abdomen, around the curve of her breast and up under her chin, keeping her gaze on his.
She nodded, her expression cock-drunk despite the shyness, “when— when can we do that again?”
Her question pulled an astonished laugh out of Bucky as he wrapped a hair strand around his finger, “any time you want, my love.” He brought her forehead to his lips, kissing her adoringly.
Gods, he was so in love that his heart felt like it would burst.
She smiled bigger, satisfied with the answer as she moved closer, settling on her orc’s broad chest and snuggling close to his warmth, “I love you, Bucky.”
“I love you, sweet thing.” Bucky gave her lips a deep kiss.
“So orcs do do that.” She mumbled with a sleepy smile against his lips, making him laugh into her mouth.
She giggled a little before pushing her nose further into Bucky’s neck, gracefully falling asleep to his scent.
As she laid in his arms, vulnerable and exposed, Bucky felt a surge of protectiveness wash over him as he pulled the heavy blanket up her naked form, holding her closer to him.
He pressed a gentle kiss to her hairline, vowing to always be there for her. She was his, and he was hers, destined together through a love that defied all odds.
And as they drifted off to sleep in each other's arms, Bucky knew that he had found his home, his safe haven, in the embrace of this one girl who had so easily stolen his heart.
~
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Text
Rindou x Reader
wc: 1200
angst, fluff
not edited
Rindou loves you. You know he does, but he has this annoying habit of not listening to you sometimes. Especially when it comes to recommendations. You recommend him food? Yeah, he'll try it. spoiler alert: he forgets. what about a movie you watched the other day and liked so much that you told him to watch it immediately? "Yeah, when I have time I will" is his answer. However, he'll only watch it if someone else recommends it too not even remembering you mentioning anything about it. And then he has the nerve to tell you all about it while you listen to him unimpressed. Sometimes it makes you feel like your opinion matters very little to him but you've never told him this. Part of you doesn't want to seem like an insecure girlfriend while the other part thinks there is no deep meaning to this.
This war in your mind ended when you entered your bedroom after having a bad day and saw Rindou sitting on the bed leaning his back on the headboard and "One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest" in his hands. You remember telling him how you cried reading it. However, you're surprised he's reading what you recommended. sensing your presence Rindou removed his glasses and looked at you.
"Tired?"
"Exhausted" you sit beside him "Do you like it?" you ask indicating the book.
He shrugs
"I've only read 20 pages yet. But Kakucho said it's really good"
You roll your eyes. thinking that you should've seen this coming you mumble "Of course he did" which wasn't as quiet as you expected because Rindou turned to you with a confused hum. You just shake your head as in "nothing" and try to get up but Rindou grips your arm and makes you sit back down. You sigh not having enough energy to deal with this.
"What is it?"
"Are you mad at me?"
"Should I be?"
He closed the book setting it aside as he turned to me with narrowed his eyes as if sensing the trap.
"I... don't know. What did I do?"
"It's nothing Rindou, let me go"
Your words had the opposite effect as his grip tightened.
"That's not my name" His voice got low
"Uh it actually is"
"Not for you. Did I fuck up that badly?"
Now that you think about it no he didn't. It's probably you who's overreacting and creating a problem over nothing. You sound ridiculous even to you and you hate yourself.
"It's really nothing. I've just had a bad day so... I just wanna sleep"
After a moment of hesitation, Rindou let you go, his eyes following as you got changed and got in bed turning your back to him. As you lay in bed your overthinking got worse. The fact that he doesn't know what he's doing affects you this badly means that he's not doing it on purpose. But that's even worse. Does that mean that he doesn't even value your opinion enough to think about how neglecting it would affect you? Maybe he thinks you don't care about it so he doesn't too. Or maybe he just forgets. This also means he doesn't care. Every version you think about leads to you thinking he doesn't care and that feels really shitty.
On the other hand, Rindou was watching you lying silently with your back to him and he knew then he definitely did something wrong. You get in bed and do not snuggle up to him planting your head in his neck? Yes, something is terribly wrong.
"C'mon love, tell me what's wrong" he snaked his arm around your waist, and turns out this is all it took for your tears to run free. You bite your lip to stop it from trembling feeling so stupid for crying over something so trivial.
"And don't you dare to say it's nothing bec- are you crying?"
Rindou could swear he heard his heart crash. He turned you around to face him. tucking your hair behind your ear he quickly wiped your tears.
"Hey, don't cry, i- I'm sorry okay? Whatever I did, I didn't mean it just don't cry"
Even though he thought, and has told you this plenty of times, that you looked pretty when you cried, he hated when you cried. Even more, when he was the reason behind those tears.
"Talk to me please?"
Looking anywhere but at him, you opened your mouth to speak.
"It's really stupid"
"So stupid that you're crying over it? I don't care, tell me."
You don't want to.
"It's just... sometimes you don't listen to me"
Rindou was confused. You sound so crazy to him right now. He doesn't listen to you? You have him wrapped around your finger. Your word is a fucking law to him and you have the nerve to say that he doesn't listen to you? He only listens to you.
"What do you mean?"
"Everything I suggest you just forget until someone else suggests the same thing. Like-" You sniffle between speech "Like this book. You're reading it because Kakucho told you, but I told you to read it weeks ago"
The more you talk the more you want to shut up. Dreading seeing Rindou's expression you focus on your hands.
"It feels like you don't care about my opinion. It's so stupid I know..."
"I don- What?" Rindou couldn't help but exclaim. His mind processing thousands of thoughts right now. You think he doesn't care? How long have you been feeling like this? And you didn't tell him? Is there anything else you're not telling him because it's so "stupid"? "Listen, love, I'm so sorry, I didn't know- Of course, I care, Who do you think I listen to if not you? Ran? Fucker used to think Julius Caeser was named after the salad."
That made you chuckle and it was like a rainbow after the storm for Rindou. A sound he never wants to stop hearing. smiling at you he continued.
"I do listen to you okay? I remember every little detail you tell me. Starting with the shows you watch to the drama going on at your work. By the way, Rika got what she deserved, she was being the bitch first."
"That's what I'm saying" You exclaim and Rindou was so happy he could see you smiling again.
"I don't want you to doubt your value in my life okay? You're the best thing ever happened to me and I'd be a dumbass if I didn't appreciate you. And don't ever try to hide things from me again. No matter how stupid you think it is. Nothing is stupid to me when it comes to you. So no more tears, alright?"
You nod scooting closer.
"alright"
Rindou wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you against his chest, kissing the crown of your head.
"By the way, I started reading this book because you suggested it. Kakuchou saw it in my car when I bought it and told me it was good"
"Really?"
"Yes, really. Sleep now"
"Goodnight"
"Goodnight, love"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
got the idea from modern family's one episode
might delete this one too later, not sure. just felt like sharing
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bonefall · 2 days
Note
I know you don’t rewrite arcs until they’re done, but I love hearing about your early ideas while I brood over how badly this arc has let me down. Do you have any like super vague ideas about Splashtail’s motivations yet? He’s like a way worse Hawkfrost in my mind, because they’re both very young cats who Are Just Evil. But Hawkfrost had a genuinely interesting backstory that the Erin’s simply fumbled, meanwhile Splashtail is a cartoonishly evil atheist. I feel nothing towards him, he’s not intimidating or interesting or even funny. Save me Bonefall save me (if I got something wrong please ignore it, these books are so disappointing my brain is making me forget them to protect itself.)
If it helps at all, I'm staying sane with the observation that Hawkfrost is a high charisma character making critical failure rolls, while Splashtail is a cringefail loser with no stats rolling nat20s. He becomes 50% more sufferable when you imagine a long, pungent pause after anything he says, broken only by the sound of an offscreen player tossing some dice. When the silence is broken, it's whatever NPC has been charmed speaking in the beleaguered voice of the dungeon master.
SO my early thoughts are shaping up to be that I'd like to do a slightly more serious version of that.
BB!Splashtail is the Clan equivalent of a 19-year-old, desperate for more power and respect in his society. In terms of his stats, he's promising but not outstanding. A decent fighter, a competent leader. Even in terms of lineage; his father is Sneezecloud, a respected trader and negotiator, but his mother is Havenpelt. An ex-rogue who has sworn to live by the ways of RiverClan.
Curlfeather is the one with the plans. She's the one with vision. Daughter of Reedwhisker, grandchild of Mistystar, with grand leaders like Bluestar, Oakheart, and Crookedstar in her past, greatness runs in her blood. Scandal, too-- but for some reason it's acceptable that her great-grandparents were codebreaking traitors.
Splashtail hates Curlfeather, but he can't get anywhere unless he tries to be her. He steals HER plans. He acts like SHE does. Manages to snatch power from her paws, and then has no idea what to do with it.
I'm thinking that I want his reign to be going smoothly at first, actually, going from a bit of a bossy jerk, to trying to enact Curlfeather's ambitions by launching fights and doing it badly, to active tyranny as he tries to keep control over RiverClan. Depending on how Star goes, I might have Berryheart make some kind of move to seize power over him.
At the core of how I see him though, is that Splashtail has no plan. His ideology leans Thistle Law... in a sort of dumbass 4Channer kind of way. He talks a big game about the glory of battle, but folds fast when his enemy can punch back. The only person he could successfully manipulate was a traumatized child. He will bring back pureblooded glory to the Clan, except his personal family of course
As for the Evil Atheism stuff... lol. Lmao, even. Not needed. If I need to make him a more powerful and serious danger, it's not going to come from the fact he's godless. If being an atheist gave you super murder powers, Bill Nye would have used them to obliterate half of the US government by now.
Depending on how the last book of ASC goes,
The Harelight kill is probably going to get changed to Hallowflight. Harelight watches his dad die, and Splashstar is drenched in the blood of one of RiverClan's most famous heroes. No turning back after that.
On that note I'd also make the fight longer and bloodier. A butchery of an execution showcasing Splashtail fighting like a beast and Hallowflight like a trained warrior.
I REAALLY want to make Splashtail's death a drowning. Curlfeather, demon she is now, finishes him off by dragging him under. To protect her daughter. They will have to do something VERY satisfying for me to not do this.
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jinwoosungs · 8 hours
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{ 152 }
motherland.
jinwoo sung x fem.reader
{ it's okay, even if you're not strong enough to erase all tears | after you rest your tired heart | wish for a better tomorrow and fall asleep | like the young children do... }
your heart was broken after receiving an email that detailed your poor performance on a series of assignments, the disappointment felt from your professor being all the more apparent with each word that you read.
you were currently in your kitchen, heating up some soup to eat for your lunch, but the sudden sour feeling felt in the pit of your stomach made you nauseous. your appetite was sapped from you as you looked at your phone, your anxieties mounting while reading each constructive criticism your professor had given you. you felt each word cut through your heart like a knife, slicing your confidence until it was left in shreds.
shutting off your stove, you allow the lukewarm soup to remain in the pot, your eyes never straying away from your phone and the email you received from your professor. he laments on his concern for your comprehension of the material, and asks if you would like to meet with him sometime this week to go over the material-
but you couldn’t bring yourself to reply to him, feeling your disappointment and stress boiling deep within your soul.
admittedly, you hated yourself.
you hated how you kept second guessing yourself and chose to write about the wrong answers.
you hated how much concern your professor held for you while questioning your competence.
but most importantly-
you hated how badly you had messed up and wanted nothing more than the earth to swallow you up whole.
ultimately… you didn’t want to even exist anymore.
your tears hinder your vision as you made your way back into your bedroom, landing headfirst into bed, allowing your phone to slip from your hands and onto the floor. choked sobs wracked through you, and you were crying so much that you made yourself become nauseous in response.
you had been wallowing in your misery for a few minutes when you felt the air suddenly shift around you, yet your tears drown out the sounds of the shadowy wisps parting, making way for your boyfriend as his heavy footsteps were heard coming into your room.
“my love… oh, my darling treasure.” jinwoo coos at you, taking advantage of his strength as he picks you up from the bed and into his strong embrace. he comforts you, pressing lingering kisses against your damp skin, tasting the saltiness of your tears as your chest began to heave endlessly in tune to your cries.
it worsens with jinwoo’s sudden appearance, yet still, you cling to him, your cries growing in intensity as you desperately sought comfort from him.
but jinwoo does little to try and stop your tears. he simply holds you close to his chest, letting your tears wet the front of his turtleneck sweater while drawing comforting circles against your back. it wasn’t until several minutes later that you were able to calm down, your cries simmering down to soft sniffles as your tears went from a cascade to singular droplets felt against your skin (like spring rain.)
jinwoo continues to hold you in his embrace, settling you down on his lap the moment he takes a seat against the mattress of your shared bed. he brushes back your hair before gently framing at your face. he keeps your head still before leaning forward to press a kiss against your forehead.
“what’s wrong? the moment bellion and beru sent me distress signals pertaining to you… i looked through their eyes and saw you crying your eyes out.”
a pained expression was seen within jinwoo’s grey eyes when he frames at your face again, forcing you to meet his gaze. “seeing you so broken hurt me, sarang, so please, tell me what happened?”
you close your eyes and give jinwoo a nod, slowly telling him about the email you received from your professor as you were making your lunch. you admit to him about how you failed, which sends another wave of sobs to course through you.
yet jinwoo remains vigilant when it comes to comforting you and simply holds you tighter to his chest, whispering loving words to you. when you were done with your explanation did jinwoo begin to speak his thoughts aloud.
“it’s okay, sometimes failures can be more beneficial than successes. they help us grow and learn new things, and i know that this experience will only serve to make you stronger and smarter. and besides, despite your shortcomings, your professor even stated on how much he’s willing to help you do better.” he gently pulls you away from his chest, chuckling lightly at your pouting face.
you take in a deep breath, already beginning to feel better the more you listened to his words, “do you mean it, jinwoo?”
your loving boyfriend simply gives you a nod, all while brushing back your hair. “i do… just remember, even if you fail again, it’s not the end of the world. we all fail at some point in our lives; it’s a very normal- a very human experience.”
feeling deeply comforted by his words, you come closer to him and throw your arms around him, squeezing him tightly against your form.
“thank you… for coming to me when you knew i needed you the most. your words make me feel so much better… and i love you for it.”
“i love you too, sarang.”
jinwoo proceeds to kiss away your remaining tears before picking you up within his embrace, nuzzling your face before going into the kitchen to cook you your favorite meal, wanting to cheer you up as you basked in his unconditional love for you.
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a.n. - today has been a little rough on me, and i wanted to write a comfort fic with jinwoo to help me feel better. failure sucks, but ultimately, it’s part of being human… as long as i’m willing to learn from my mistakes, then there’s always a chance ♡
all stories are written by rei; reposts, translations, and plagiarism are not allowed.
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peekaboo
HERE'S THE SNEAK PEEK YOU ALL WANTED SO BADLY LMAO
uhh no active warnings so far?? this is like 200 nope it's 300 ish words.
Luci x f!sinner, pre-established marriage, etc etc.
i'm so tired and brain is nOt brAInInG
but here you go lol
Your husband, Lucifer, had been ignoring you for three months by now, and there didn't seem to be anything you could do about it while still being respectful. You had tried everything you could while giving him his space-- You texted him, left him sticky notes on his desk, and had Charlie try talking to him-- All to no avail. 
Today was the day, you decided. You were sick and tired of Lucifer ignoring not only you but his daughter as well. Of course, you'd still let him have his space for the day, but after you were done with your errands, you'd come home and confront him. 
You made your way downtown to Charlie's Hazbin Hotel, politely smiling at the people you passed. No one tried to stop you today, thank God, and you made it there just in time for Charlie's first exercise to start. 
Waving as you slipped in, you sighed, sitting down and closing your eyes. You hated to admit it, but sleeping in a bed by yourself had been terrible. Worse than terrible, really. 
Your once-constant nightmares. which had dissipated after you started sleeping next to Lucifer, had returned and plagued you once again. You tried your best not to scream once you awoke, but it didn't help your panic. Without Lucifer beside you, calming down was, once again, a much harder task. 
"Hey, Mom. I'm so glad you came today," Charlie said, sitting next to you and smiling, "Have you heard anything from Dad yet?"
"I'd love to tell you I have, but it's still a no. Not a single word."
"Dammit. I wish I knew how I could help you. This is just the worst. Well, I mean, not as bad as after my mo- After Lilith left, but you get what I mean." She sighed, leaning back. 
"It's alright, Chars. You're doing your best." You gave her a soft, if not somewhat forced smile.
i AM open to feedback cause yk I'm just trying to get better like everyone else is.
but thanks for reading guys! i'm hoping to post more things here, but who knows? i sure as hell don't.
TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES!!
❤️❤️❤️
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remia-art · 8 hours
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Okay, but thank you so much.
Like, I genuinely like Tommy, and I think he and Buck are cute, but it kinda makes me sad to see how nice and happy and gentle the fandom is with his character versus like any of Buck/Eddie’s female love interests.
Especially when I saw people saying that Tommy is Buck’s most developed love interest?? Like, I don’t like Abby but she was literally a main character in season one?? And Tommy who has appeared in four episodes is more developed? Huh??
Anyway, it just kinda sucks to see people treat the female love interests in this show so badly. Like I can admit some of them weren’t written the best, but it feels like there’s a generosity that’s afforded Tommy that’s never been afforded to the women.
And again, don’t get me wrong, I lovelovelove getting to see more queer relationships on the show. I just wish that the fandom could realize that queer relationships don’t mean you have to like disparage every existing female love interest, yknow?
I get you on a spiritual level my dear. Thank you. Exactly what I meant. Some shippers automatically see me as their opposition.
I ship buddie, I really like bucktommy for now, they have chemistry and are sooo cute. Of course.
But I hate the total disregard of female characters in this fandom. As you said and I will continue : Abby started Buck's development. And both him and Eddie grew with each partner they had. And I love and respect all of these girls as characters, with their mistakes and wrong timing.
I just remember the times after Shannon died, I would come to AO3 and there would be tags like "Shannon lives", "we don't die like Shannon", "Shannon is a good mother" and so on
Like, I remember my dear fandom mourning Shannon, my buddie friend shippers being pissed about her death, noone wanted buddie to happen then on Shannon's bones.
Then we moved on, but it was their development nonetheless.
Bucktommy is supermegacute, as Tommy would say, they're "adorable". But if he wasn't a man... God... If it was Tamara (woman), we wouldn't be here.
And anyone who wants to fight me on that, don't bother. I was you when I was 11 years old, I remember.
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friendly reminder that self harm is lying to you
#the worst is when it promises you'll feel better and then you simply. do not. you feel worse and then you want to harm again bc surely that#will make you feel better right? THAT WOULD BE A NO. IT DOES NOT.#anyway today i went to spotlight cause i was sad cause i got the result for my 35% assignment i really struggled with. 32.5%. failure.#and at spotlight i made the foolish error of buying without knowing price. but like who makes a book a normal softcover crochet pattern boo#$55?! anyway it's a lovely book and am excited to try a few of teh patterns but the guilt is eating me alive#and also im super stressed about the assignment i have to turn in on thursday and haven't started#anyway i was literally four and a half hours away from being seven days clean#and i am just so sad right now#and i reopened one of the scars on my wrist too while on shift this morning so that's fun#not badly but it's just gonna mean it scars even more isn't it because of course#i was feeling incredibly awful for some reason i can't even remember and i kinda clawed up my arms. and no i don't count that as#breaking my streak bc it didn't cause much damage#i just. placement is so wonderful but life is so so hard#i don't know i want a hug and the assignment done and everything bad unmade#and the scars i have to look at every day on placement gone.#i want to talk to s but i haven't responded to her last message and i don't know how to respond but i need to respond to that#:((#honestly actually i think i want to talk to aunty. friend's mum. in person. and get a hug. i want a hug.#im just. So Sad. and i want my brother and Ransom and this is not helpinga nd i don't know what would if anything
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I think the hardest thing in writing for me sometimes is the like “show don’t tell/let people communicate through subtext/Normal People don’t just walk around openly explaining their motivations for everything That’s Unnatural” thing because like.. I literally DO walk around openly explaining my motivations for everything, that is how I talk, I am an analytical detail oriented over-communicator who explains everything as thoroughly as possible and and will give a fully detailed 2 minute long answer to something simple like “how are you doing today?” .. like it’s hard to make things sound Natural and Normal when you yourself are inherently unnatural and abnormal in your methods of communication to an extent lol
#''hey. whats up? you look kind of sad.. is something wrong?''   normal answer (apparently how people are supposed to talk): *looks away#remosefully and stares into the distance* ''n-no.. I'm fine. don't worry about it.''   abnormal answer (how I would respond): ''Yeah I#'m mostly fine. I was just thinking about what the future is going to be like 30 years from now and if I'll ever actually accomplish anythin#g that I want to. which makes me feel X way for XYZ reason. you see because I had a dream last night that made me think of *continues to exp#lain my exact emotional state and inner thought process completely matter of factly in exact detail for 5 more minutes*#tfw you would be a badly written character if you existed in a story lol#This is also why I struggle making conflict because most conflicts can be resolved through conversation and I personally love to have long#detailed conversations about everything. Like literally I don't have hardly any conflicts interpersonally because if something happens it's#immediately followed up with like ''hey sorry if my tone of voice sounded a bit pointed or harsh. when you were talking to me I was trying#to balance all the stuff I was taking up the stairs and also my leg hurts so I think all my mental energy was being used there and I just#didn't feel like talking. I should have just said 'wait a minute and we can discuss it inside' instead of trying to end the conversation qui#ckly in a short rude way.' ''oh yeah thats fine. I thought it was something like that. sorry for hounding you about the topic as well. i#havent eaten in a while so I think I'm just a bit prickly at the moment. we should both rest for a while and destress from the store#trip and then talk about it later. maybe after lunch?' 'sure. sounds good.' like LITERALLY. lol#it is so hard for me to write characters who are bad communicators or don't understand their own internal states or arent constantly#analyzing their own actions to understand what they do/don't feel and why and what the cause of it is and etc. etc. etc.#I just naturally want everyone to perfectly undertsand everything and communicate amazingly and have complete self awareness and#logical presence of mind gjhbj.. which like.. of course comes across as unnatyural and also those type of people rarely ever get involved in#conflict and conflict is APPARENTLY what drives stories (even though I don't like most conflicts and just want to resolve them lol) so ...aa#I mean you can get around this to some degree by the fact that (at least in my opinion) no rule for dialogue is 100%. dialogue is good if it#sounds naturally like it comes from the character who said it. It can be meandering and pointless and rambly IF that matches the character.#it can be dry and overly self aware IF your character is that way and it suits them. So like throwing in a few detached scholar types or lik#e '5000 year old cave dwelling hermit' type people is good for me and works BUT the thing is an ENTIRE cast of characters can't be that way.#at some point - even in a setting where everyone is reserved and academic (like a research camp in the wilderness full of scholars and stuff#) still SOMEBODY has to be the one who's conflict prone and doesn't pristinely understand all of their emotions and etc. etc. Because statis#tically that is still literally the majority. Kind of like my tendency to make everyone 100% aromantic and asexul when it's like.. YES.. may#be 2 or 3 or even 4 out of 10 of them could be that way. but like.. an entire group? a diverse group of 10 people from all walks of life and#EVERY single one is like that??? hgjh . you have to add realistic variety#As much as I'm pro 'have more stories where sex or romance are literally NOT involved at all in any capacity since it's already oversaturate#d in media' I'm also dedicated to realism. alas. (at least as realistic as you can get in a fantasy setting lol)
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robotpussy · 1 year
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its always "be your own person, i support you self expressing yourself" but as soon as i mention anything i want to do all of a sudden its the wrong decision and i should just do whatever my mum tells me
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solomon-tozer · 1 year
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I don't really have anyone I can share this with but, um.... yeah. I'm. Gonna learn more. Hopefully.
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musical-chick-13 · 2 years
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A really irritating thing is I do have some criticisms of season 8, because I have criticisms of ALL pieces of TV. (For example, I’ve definitely talked briefly before about how they bungled the ending of Mel’s arc and my conflicting feelings on Theon dying.) There are some other things I’d wished they explored. But I can’t say any of these things, because when I try to talk with ANYONE about the show out in the world, every ounce of energy and every second of time has to be spent explaining why I didn’t hate season 8 as a whole and don’t think the show itself has retroactively been turned into trash because of it.
#like...I know this is all probably making me look like a pretentious fuck but I do at least TRY to make my criticisms 'I cannot find#anything in the text to support this' instead of 'I didn't get my Perfect Fantasy Endgame Ending'#people only cared about jn dny ary and if jm ended up with b so of course none of the criticisms involve the characters mentioned above#because people missed the whole point and picked one or two characters to care about in any way and fuck everyone else#(and then try and moralize everything their chosen fave(s) did in order to...idk prove they stanned the 'good' character or something??)#like. most criticism I've seen boils down to 'dy was the Final Villain and then she died hashtag antifeminism'#(with maybe a side of 'whY dId j bETrAy hEr' and 'jm threw away a potential life with b why was he rEtcOnNeD iNtO a bAd pErSoN')#and these are the ONLY REASONS GIVEN as for why The End Was All Bad#it's never anything else!!!!!#(and imo those things were actually the endpoints of these characters that made the most sense to me!!!!!!!!!)#you want to talk about major story decisions that were ACTUALLY HANDLED BADLY ON ALL ACCOUNTS let me take you back to season 5 where#they did not do ANYTHING to set up stannis burning shireen at the stake and in fact went OUT OF THEIR WAY to tell the audience that#he loved his daughter up until like. the last possible moment.#but again. no one cares about THOSE characters so it was just 'oh haha what a bad dad *insert meme*'#In the Vents
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n0ct0urn1quet · 1 year
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hgonesly at this point i really do wish i could just say Fuck It and disappear off the face of the earth for a little bit bc honestly . i donot want to be alive
#2023 off to a banger start for me (got into an argument with my mom on new years about her bf reminding me of my abusive dad#and havent had peace or a good nights sleep since!!!!!!!!!!!)#i am absolutely fucking miserable and i just donot want to Do It anymore#i hate this house i hate the people i live with i hate this world and i hate everything thats happening to jme but i cant do anytihing#i cant do anything to Fix Anything i cant do anything abt my problems theres just so much Wrong With Me that i dont know how to fix#i dont know if i CAN fix most of the issues i have. i have so much ptsd and trauma from so many different things and its all just. hghg#and i want so badly to just let it out and talk to the people Around Me about it bc it is Serious and i shouldnt be just not talking about#it but. i just cant bring myself to Do That. i am constantly afraid that the people around me will be angry with me if i even so much as#speak up about the things that make me upset and its not their fault and its no ones fault but my own and i just dont know what to Do#im scared of confrontation and im worried that if i try to talk about it its gonna lead to an argument!!! i know it wouldnt but im terrifed#so id rather just not talk about it. which then leads to the problem not getting resolved because. fuck man im sure the people around me#know that somethings up but i never bring it up so therefore they never find out and it gets swept under the rug like all my other issues#i pride myself on being good at being emotional and being open but in reality i am emotional. yes. but not at all good at being open#ive never been good at it and i feel so BAD because like. yes i love you. yes i trust you and i know you would never ever be mad at me#for just talking about my feelings. i know this and i love you for it. but im so bad at conveying that. even though i trust you with mylife#im just bad at opening up. it does not matter how long we've known each other its just such a struggle for me to Be Open to anyone#of course its not much better that im coming to tumblr and puttign this here for 100+ people to see but just. i dont know#im mentally unstable ive never had good coping mechanisms and im the only person awake and everyone else that i usually vent to is asleep#so all my thoughts just get piled up into one messy little ball and it gets thrown to tumblr because i need somewhere to put them#im sorry. im exhausted. its been a long week and i wish i could just hybernate for the rest of the month and not interact with anyone#i just wish i could mvoe out and live with my gf and our cat. that is all i want and that is the only thing that would fix me
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steampoweredskeleton · 7 months
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Ignore
#delete later#this is literally the worst time for a breakdown#i need to sleep to do the fun thung tomorrow. if i dont do the fun thing tomorrow i will fully regret it#i am panicking and on the verge of tears for no reason#theres too much going on all at once#and i love having ppl in the flat i do but fuck it always triggers the shit out of me#i am both really hapoy to see yhe person abd really happy shes coming to the thing. i am also terrified someone is gonna#go for me. its not logical. im fucking terrified#and theres so many unknowns tomorrow abd im freaking out. i managed to keep myself from aaking if i was allowed to travel#with them tomorrow when they sent me the timings. bc of course thats what that meant. it wasnt a heads up to avoid those times#but now im panicking about it bc not getting the reassurance is adding to the fear. even though the point of exposure therapy#is not getting reassurance for all intrusive thoughts. this is what im meant to do#im still freaking out. tye good thing is that the game specifies that if youre overwhelmed step outside#so i can escape if i need to and probably wont shut down#ill take my headphones abd my beanie and my safe items#i dont care if i look childish. i just gotta get through it to the enjoying bit#fucking. its not pity party time. wait like one week then you can have a breakdown. cut it off. cry at therapy#also want to reiterate i love that my flatmates have ppl round. uts good and nornal and GOOD#its entirely a me problem that ut freaks me out so badly. it breaks all the rules that were hammered into me abd i become convinced#im gonna be punished for disrespecting ppl. thats a me problem. i just cabt have it just be in ny head bc im gonna explode#time to play#will the weighted blanket allow me to better dissociate or make me feel every emotion and sob#neither options are fun!!!
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