#whatever who fucking cares lmaoooo

[ongreenergrasses]

the world is infinitely worse off without my friend

#grief #i am sitting in a parking lot crying MAN this year is bad #he was a disaster a mess a fuckup but who cares. he made the world an infinitely better place. most giving person i’ve ever known #it’s also amazing to me how he managed to be an incredibly selfish person but also the biggest support in the world to people he loved. and #the reason I’m saying all this is because if he knew that i was portraying him as some sort of saint now that he’s dead he will rise from #the grave to murder me LMAOOOO he’d tell me to go fuck myself and be honest. so that’s what I’ll do #never have i had someone support me like he did. never. he would go to war with anyone for me. he was there for every decision good and bad #because he knew that the way to get me out of the bad situations was never to turn his back and always support with whatever i needed. and #he was also an incredible sibling. his siblings are so much worse off without him #.txt

[latinokaeya-moving]

mutuals that don’t want to see me get unnecessarily angry over plot points in a dumb gacha game look away neow

anyways i think the point that frustrates me the most wrt the whole kaeya diluc situation is how often i’ve seen ppl be like “oh they both are equally to blame for their falling out/strained relationship now” or whatever which is like sooo crazy 2 me bc only one of them tried to kill the other in a fit of rage n grief and then proceeded to leave them out in the middle of a storm and then fucked off out of the country for like 4 years without warning but ofc NOT before literally selling their childhood home and leaving the other essentially homeless and with no further support systems. and then when they finally came back to take over the family business they just… never spoke abt that again. lol. like only one of them did all that stuff. but whatever. yeah. kaeya is totally the unreasonable and petty one

#x #kaeya is petty but like come on. [waves hand at his entire Thing] like maybe it’s bc he’s got tiniest bit more stressful things to worry abt #LIKE COME ONNNNN #was he most likely halfway to a death wish that day n so ridden w guilt abt his past that he was perhaps deliberately provoking diluc #knowing they were Both not in the most mentally wel of states seeing as their fucking DAD died. YES. Yes He Was #diluc still tried to kill him. and probsbly would’ve if kaeya didn’t get his vision in that exact moment #n then he sold their house… THEIR CHILDHOOD HOME… #and it’s unknown whether diluc deliberately had him disowned from the family name or if kaeya took that upon himself afterwards but like #either way… like who did kaeya have left after that other than like. his friendship w jean at the time or something #diluc had the righteous fury over the death of his father and the whole KoF corruption thing to fuel him and his conviction to become public #fatui enemy number one which. great for him but kaeya had to completely rebuild his life in mond… AGAINNNNN AUGHHHHH #and he would’ve been STILL a teen/barely a young adult at the time … #IDK IDC i’m a hater i don’t like diluc i don’t like the excuses made for him i don’t care abt ppl that use his tragic backstory as a crux #for his actions he’s so lame and still treats kaeya kinda awfully in canon even tho kaeya has multiple times expressed desire (even vaguely) #to be on better terms w him…. like whatever diluc can get over his victim complex thanks xx #LMAOOOO this is long sorry i’m soooo mad abt this but i’m totally normal now i promise. definitely. #gi posting #< for bl if u guys want

[h4m1lt0ns]

HEARTBREAK SYNDROME.

episode two :: GET WELL SOON.

꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ pairing ︴max verstappen x ex!y/n

꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ genre ︴social media au / irl snippets

꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ summary ﹔healing is slow, healing is painful, but she has people who love her around so it doesn’t matter how long it takes.

fc – wonyoung jang (aged up to 28)

꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ warnings ﹕comfort, angst.

☆ IMESSAGE with ; funeral guest list.

alabono added wifey lily!

princess george added angel carmen!

PIERRE GASLYYYY added girlfriend kika!

chal eclair added babygirl alex!

babygirl alex: “funeral guest list” is crazy 😭

wifey lily: about damn time 💀🤌🏻

angel carmen: i know right like damn

girlfriend kika: we probably didn’t miss out on much let’s be real

alabono: okay chill omfg

y/n changed the group’s name to BOARD OF DIRECTORS!

my baby lando: MOM????

y/n: yes my child 😁

babygirl alex: SHE’S BAAAACK

y/n: YUHHHHHH

princess george: we were so worried abt u bitch what the fuck

chili!: ^^^^^

chal eclair: what the fuck is the point of having a phone if ur not gonna fucking answer like change ur fucking number what the fuck 😐

yukino: like i said, i’ll run him over for you

angel carmen: they were worried if you can’t tell 💀

y/n: i have 350+ new messages and

115 missed calls

y/n: trust me i know they were 🥲

honey badger: so what’s the plan now

girlfriend kika: i say burn his house down and feed his balls to his cats 🤷🏻‍♀️

babygirl alex: hell fucking yeah wtf 🔥🔥🔥

chili!: whatever happened to hello? how are you?

princess george: we don’t need to resort to violence guys 💀

my baby lando: uhm yes we do ??

my baby lando: i say we stab the fucker

alabono: we don’t need a murder charge on our hands bro 😁

angel carmen: oh lando woke up PISSED

my baby lando: i got murder on my mind 🙏🏻

y/n: yellow tape around his body it’s a fucking homicide 🗣

honey badger: wait y/n are you like okay??

chal eclair: yeah you seem normal

y/n:

having the girls with me and knowing that you guys were worried about me because you genuinely care is all i need honestly. like yeah fuck max but thank god i have amazing people like you in my life, i probably would’ve cried myself to sleep if it wasn’t for you guys. i’m so so grateful to be blessed with all of you and i know don’t say it nearly enough but i love you a lot. like really ❤️‍🩹

girlfriend kika: AWWWWWWWW

chili!: 🥲❤️🥲❤️

princess george: sry for calling u a bitch i was mad 💕

y/n: it’s okay georgie

my baby lando: always here for u 🫀🫂

chal eclair: i wanna say something but i’m gonna sound unhinged

PIERRE GASLYYYY: can you not 😃

PIERRE GASLYYYY: like we’re having a moment here

honey badger: i kinda wanna know what he wants to say..

y/n: speak ur truth bestie charles

chal eclair: ur next album is gonna be fire

y/n: you bet your fucking ass it will be 🤭

my baby lando: OHHHHH

chili!: YESSSS

babygirl alex: SLAYYYYY

alabono: LMAOOOO

y/n: now i need everyone to come over so we

can pray on max’s down fall

yukino: 🏃🏻🏃🏻🏃🏻🏃🏻🏃🏻

my baby lando: VROOM VROOM CUNTS

[aug. 16, 2023]

y/n

♡ liked by lilymhe, francisca.cgomes and 13,384,290 others.

y/n my therapy. my friends. my family. everything i ever wanted is in this silly little group and i wouldn’t change it for the world 🫂 so grateful to have u in my life everyday and i can’t thank u enough for being there for me when i needed you the most. i will always love you. forever. my whole world. 💌 and to my fans, thank u so so much for the sweet messages and all the support u’ve given me. i love you and i can’t wait till we meet again 🫶🏼❤️‍🩹🫧

tagged: danielricciardo, carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, pierregasly, yukitsunoda0511, alexalbon, landonorris, georgerussell63, carmenmmundt, lilymhe, francisca.cgomes, alexanderasaintmleux.

comments on this post have been limited.

danielricciardo welcome back to the real world

→ y/n thank u for bringing me back danny

landonorris love you the most 🧡

carlossainz55 at your service 🫡

charles_leclerc glad that you’re back to us ❤️

georgerussell63 ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

pierregasly forever violating you in your sleep 😁

→ y/n the way god intended 😁

yukitsunoda0511 love you y/n

lilymhe MY WIFE IS BACKKK 🥹

→ alexalbon come on now

→ y/n mrs steal your girl is back 😼

francisca.cgomes queen. icon even.

→ y/n says you ???

carmenmmundt love u forever 🤍

→ y/n and ever.

alexanderasaintmleux my girlfriend 😩💕

→ charles_leclerc no ??

→ y/n yes.

kellypiquet

♡ liked by redbullracing, maxverstappen1 and 492,294 others.

kellypiquet my friend. my family.

90,294 comments.

username copy paste caption i see 😍

username original queen 🔥

username obsessed with y/n huh

username u wanna be y/n soooo bad

username wouldn’t do that if i were you but okay

username how fucking long was he cheating on y/n for

→ username IT MAKES U WONDER HUH

→ username I BEEN SAYIN LIKE ???

→ username no, make it make sense. how are the going to hard launch 48 hours after a break up of a FIVE YEAR LONG RELATIONSHIP and be already going on vacations together? and m*x met her kid too? this had to have been going on for a long long time then.

→ username oh my god.

→ username oh my fucking god you’re onto something.

→ username nOW WAIT A DAMN MINUTE.

→ username thoughts are being thunk alright.

→ username he’s been cheating for a while then

→ username oh y/n :(

username yikes.

username this ain’t it

username 💀💀💀

username be so fucking for real

username this is not the slay you think it is

username bombastic side eye. criminal offensive side eye

username i’m not even sorry y’all i cackled

username screaminggggg what is thisssss

username LMFAOOOOO

username chile lemme mind my own fr

username YOU THOUGHT YOU ATE LOL

username girl 💀

#max verstappen x reader #carlos sainz x reader #charles leclerc x reader #lando norris x reader #alex albon x reader #george russell x reader #daniel ricciardo x reader #yuki tsunoda #pierre gasly x reader #lewis hamilton x reader #f1 #f1 fanfiction #f1 smau #f1 x reader #f1 x y/n #f1 x you

[ovaryacted]

Might be a bit iffy because I don’t know if this leans into the omegaverse thing you mentioned in an earlier ask, but re2r Leon with a puppy kink, being embarrassed about it because he thinks it’s weird and then him and reader just slowly easing into it…fluffy smut I guess???

Idk I just say whatever random shit pops up into my head sometimes😭 (but also just re2 Leon reminds me of a scruffy little dog and I know damn well I’m not the only one) -🐏

MDNI/18+. NSFW.

Hey, ram anon! So the omegaverse is different, involves genetic stuff with mates and the whole alpha, beta, and omega dynamics that people like to explore. Real Wattpad and Tumblr vets know what I'm talking about (that was a crazy time LMAOOOO). BUT, pet play is an actual kink that people have and I think that is what you're describing! Personally, I wasn't a big fan of pet play in a literal sense (because you live and you learn more about stuff so your opinion can change), and now I don't think it's so bad because there are many ways to mess around with kinks as a whole.

If it were up to me, pet play would be very fun, especially involving RE2R Leon. He gives pathetic puppy dog vibes and will always be at his partner's beck and call even if it comes off as embarrassing because he doesn't realize it's a kink that he enjoys. I think for him in particular, the whole dom/sub role exploration is what would get him off with the addition of a lot of praise.

It really starts with the pet names, where Leon would be praised for doing things he didn't think would actually matter. Doing a good job at work? You tell him you're proud of him. He's been doing good keeping up his routine? You remind him how good he is, and how taking care of himself makes you happy. He fucks you the way you want and makes you feel good? You praise him for doing that and call him a good boy for following your orders.

Leon doesn't realize that your ability to just acknowledge his accomplishments no matter how big and small makes him beam from ear to ear. It makes him feel good that you care about his presence in the first place, that you have this much control over his outlook on life. With every statement of validation you give him, he becomes more devoted to you, like a dog who has found their forever home. If he had a tail, it would be wagging from side to side, that's the best way to put it.

But when he finds himself more curious about why he likes your praising so much, he comes to terms with the fact that it's more than just you caring about him. To Leon, you are his escape, you keep him put together and grounded when the world gets to be too overwhelming. You have him wrapped around your finger and you know this, nor is he complaining about this fact anyway, that's what he wants, what he enjoys.

So when you come up with a proposition to help Leon figure out the best way to explore this new dynamic, he follows along, because he assumes you know best. Currently, he rests his head on your lap, your fingers running through his hair and raking through his scalp. It feels nice, better than good, and a rumble of a sigh slips out of him, reminiscent of a purr.

"That feels good baby?", you ask to him, and he can feel the tips of his ears growing hot at just the sound of your voice.

"Yeah, feels nice", he says with his eyes closed. He's trying to bask in your attention, in letting you pet or touch him however you wanted.

"Good. You can stay like that for however long you want", and of course, he's going to stay until he gets his fill. This was only the beginning of an introduction to something Leon would eventually need. Baby steps.

It takes a while to fully ease Leon into this new kink lifestyle. At first, he didn't think you'd be into it, would judge him for liking something out of the ordinary. But you're just as into it as he is, and it progresses the more you test the limits.

Now with his face in between your thighs, he licked at your cunt incessantly, lapping at it like his personal water bowl. Your hand remained in place at his head, holding him against you, and the other was curled around the leash that was connected to his neck. The suggestion of wearing a collar and leash in the bedroom would make some people raise their eyebrows, but not for you. You didn't expect Leon to be so enthusiastic about the idea, but the feeling of being yours was enough to make his body throb.

Leon's knees were planted to the floor as your legs slouched over his shoulders, his hands rubbing on the underside of them and pressing himself closer to where you needed him. The tip of his nose rubbed into your pulsing clit, his tongue caressing your inner walls as they clenched around him. Your hips moved towards his face, feeling him hum against you and whining when you pulled him away from your heat.

"How does that feel honey? Mama knows how to take care of her puppy no?", Leon looked up at you with hazy blue eyes, his tongue lolling against his plump lips and giving you a nod.

"Mhm, so good. Need more...please let me give you more", he nuzzled his face into your inner knee, placing a soft kiss to calm his own desires.

"Good boy. Make me cum and I'll fuck you after, a treat for being so good for me", the praise made Leon's cock twitch against his pelvis, your fingers pulling him back towards your dripping seam with a tug of the leash. He didn't waste any time, whimpering at the taste of your slick filling his mouth once more and his eyes fluttering closed again.

Anything to please his owner, anything to hear you praise him the way he craves. Being owned by you is where he belongs, ready to do whatever you said just so you can tell him he's a good boy, your good boy.

#ovaryacted asks #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy smut #leon kennedy x you #leon kennedy #leon scott kennedy #leon s kennedy #leon kennedy imagine #leon kennedy headcanons #resident evil #resident evil smut #resident evil x reader #₊˚⊹ ♡ ─ ram anon 🐏

[statementlou]

i feel like i can talk to you about this because you have rational opinions. so louis bought a starbucks coffee at the airport and the fandom on twitter are eating him alive, calling him evil and wishing he goes to hell. i’m disappointed since starbucks is on the list of brands to boycott but i feel like this reaction is too much? someone even said jay would be disappointed in him, but people said that was taking it too far. i don’t know, i love louis and i’ll keep supporting him and his music but the fact he can be a careless millionaire is disappointing

1. thank you sweetie I would boop if I could 2. oh my god it's a fucking cup of coffee and if people think that's the worst thing Louis, a multi millionaire, has ever done financially they need a reality check! His money will be handled by bankers who are putting it into all kinds of evil fucking shit that he won't even know about, it's actually very hard to know or control that and there is no way trying is even on his radar. That's a passive thing and not on purpose; but the fact that people don't bother to know about that or care really speaks to how performative this kind of online approach to activism is, that they only care about image rather than effect (the effect of his investments would be easily thousands of times more than any number of coffees or even of the promotion Starbucks might get from him holding it.) But furthermore buckle in cause you hit a nerve: Starbucks isn't even an actual organized boycott target as concerns Palestine because THEY HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THE ISRAELI GOVERNMENT financially! The official BDS movement calls for boycott of very specific and pointed targets of which Starbucks IS NOT ONE it's literally just an online trend which is not the same as an actual boycott to materially impact a target! Losing them money is always great, they are a crappy union busting small business killing corporation, but it has zero direct effect to help Palestinians unlike supporting the meaningful boycotts called for by BDS. I don't think Louis has decided to buy starbucks because he has this analysis, but to me it's a pretty important point. Him crossing an actual picket line (playing Israel, playing Eurovision [lmaoooo that thought tho], waving an Israeli flag god forbid) would be a very different situation and something that would trouble me so the distinction matters to me. But I get that to people on twitter, that's what they feel like he has done. To which I would say...

There are so many fewer ways to help Palestine than we would wish, and it's SO hard to deal with feeling so powerless right now in the face of such horror, so I love that people feel so strongly about doing whatever they possibly can. But worrying about consumer spending, even on BDS targets, is perhaps the least effective of the things a person can do. Note that BDS boycotts do not mostly focus on asking people not to buy things; they list the products that are especially complicit, but the main work of the movement is to get large investors (corporations, public institutions, whole governments) to divest from the companies targeted because that actually hurts them enough that it becomes less profitable to continue to collude with Israel than to drop them as clients. Consumer spending is not enough to do this. It's easy and doesn't require doing actual work but it's basically virtue signaling, not organizing. Just NOT doing something (yes including voting) is not enough! I personally choose not to give my money to certain corporations because it feels bad to me and I can't stomach doing it, even if they never notice me doing it. But if I was running out of fuel and the only nearby station was a Chevron, I would spend a few bucks there and not beat myself up about it because it will have zero impact on their overall profit reports but a LOT of impact on my life. And if I was in the airport for the second time in mere days after circumnavigating the globe and playing a massive show and doing press and fan service before even having time to adjust time zones and about to get on another flight to another country I might buy a fucking coffee from whatever coffee shop was in there too! But Louis isn't me and I'm gonna be real honest I would be real surprised if he KNEW there was a boycott or gave a shit- he is not a political activist! It's reasonable to be disappointed if someone behaves not how you want them to, but just in general responding to being disappointed in people by lashing out at them is... not it. Not useful, not rational, and not actually an okay way to act to other people. Louis is an awesome sweet caring person who I believe tries hard not to have a negative impact on anyone directly and who cares very much about others; if that's not enough for someone to be a fan of him, okay then they should not be a fan of him! But warning: they're not going to be able to be a fan of anyone else either. No one is pure and perfect... maybe that energy would be better spent trying to make a meaningful difference in the world, and a great first step in that IMO is to recognize and challenge your inner cop. The better world I want to live in doesn't include policing other people, not on twitter and not anywhere.

#anyway just read the BDS link! #I'm pretty sure starbucks dont even have stores in israel. this whole 'boycott' is such a fucking waste of energy istg DO SOMEtHIGN USeFUL #comrade louis.... or not lol #to be clear... that tag is a bit of a joke to me. he's a fucking millionaire! the rich are not our political saviors! #he cares and he tries and he is better than 99% of people. but he is not john brown okay #if people had class analysis wrt to capitalism rather than just image concerns... well. it would be better. #palestine #long post #sorry :( #starbucks discourse

[wonwoonlight]

are you like me too? / kwon soonyoung

⇢ Soonyoung x fem!Reader

⇢ word count: 1.1k

⇢ angst // breakup(??)!au // comfort?

⇢ A/N: i wrote this in like, 30 minutes bc i was watching the epik high and hosh's performance in akmu's show and got a random burst of writing juice so. enjoy? i'm obsessed w the song and this particular part btw so it's definitely inspired by that. as always not proofread but do enjoy somehow lol

요즘 뭘 먹고 마시고 어떤 행복을 찾는지 what are you eating and drinking these days? what kid of happiness are you looking for? epik high ft. hoshi - screen time

[ - - - ]

Soonyoung has never felt so stupid.

But, then again, being drunk and regretful at the same time is an obvious recipe for disaster.

He doesn’t even usually get drunk, as he’s often already passed out before he gets to that point. But there’s something about tonight that compels him to keep on throwing back drinks over drinks even though Jihoon is already looking at him in worry and Chaeyoung is trying to stop him from getting more.

But of course, drunk Kwon Soonyoung is even more hard headed than normal Kwon Soonyoung and Jihoon eventually tells the younger girl to just stop trying because perhaps the guy needs it.

After all, Jihoon knows Soonyoung has been regretting his decision to end… whatever it is he had with a certain someone and he hasn’t had the chance to properly throw himself a pity party that it’s probably been eating him inside out for the past week.

“Why the fuck did I…” He mutters to himself, not even caring that two of his friends are there worried out of their minds. He eventually kicks them out an hour later because he can only handle so much pity being thrown his way in his own fucking house. 

He’s pitiful–pathetic, he knows, but it doesn’t make things any better and he does need this to (hopefully) make peace with whatever stupid decision he made last week to end things with you.

You’re not even his girlfriend–and whose fault is that?–he swallows another shot bitterly. And yet suddenly not having you any longer feels more painful than the last time he broke up with his ex-girlfriend.

Is it simply the alcohol, bubbling thoughts into his mind? Amplifying the pains even though it’s not really all that?

He glares at his phone, silent with nonexistent notifications from you. And then he looks at the mirror and glare at himself for pushing himself into such a situation.

Why did he think it was a good call to cut you off his life when it was him who talked to you first, asked for your number, begged you for a chance to go on dates, and now grovelling in his own room because he told you that he thinks it’s better to stop seeing each other when you’re not even yet in a relationship.

What was there to end, really?

A possibility, perhaps. 

Love that was possibly growing in your heart that he cruelly plucked when it hadn’t even bloomed.

Is that a good thing, then?

Would it hurt more for you if your feelings had grown deeper than what you currently harbour towards him?

He takes his phone and scrolls through your old texts once again. He can probably recite them in his sleep at this point, but he doesn’t care because he misses you and he wishes he still has you–your texts, your laughter, your touch, your voice–you. 

🧡: look at this dumb dog lmaoooo

how can u call him dumb :(

hes cute u meanie :(

🧡: //youre/// dumb🙄🙄

🧡: you know i dont mean it like that 😠😠😠😠

🧡: how dare you make me a villain against dogs!!!!

He takes a deep breath as he plays the video you sent for the nth time, still having it in him to smile at your small dog trying to jump into the sofa even though you had laid out a perfectly new dog stairs right next to it.

He presses his lips together at the sound of your laughter in the background, probably the only way he’s still able to hear it now. 

It’s only been a week. He knows it’s only been a fucking week. But he’s already wondering how you’re doing and who’s making you laugh, if you get to eat that dumpling that you’ve been wanting to try since last month, if you’re sending your dog videos to someone else now, if you’re still watching the drama that you were watching with him.

…If someone’s holding you because, maybe… and just maybe… you’re also as sad as he is.

He hopes you’re not though. He doesn’t wish this wrenching feeling in his chest upon you.

He hopes you don’t like him enough to be as sad as he is.

He hopes you don’t like him enough to drink yourself to sleep–to numb the pain and silence the voices inside your head.

Closing his eyes, he contemplates on calling you. But he remembers that it was him who rids himself of that choice.

“Hello?”

Fuck. He’s even imagining your voice now.

“Hello?” Your voice calls once again, and Soonyoung grips his phone tighter because it’s getting too real and perhaps it is time to stop drinking. “Soonyoung? Are you there? Are you okay?”

He jumps when he realises it’s actually you, panics when he realises he accidentally presses call when he’s too deep in his thoughts. For someone who contemplated on calling you just not too long ago, he’s suddenly hyper aware of the situation and no longer sure what to say.

He opens his mouth to say something, but a violent cough makes it out of his lips–enough for him to hit his chest because it feels like he’s about to vomit though there’s nothing in his throat.

He hears you panic from the other side, and as much as he wants to tell you not to worry and apologize, he couldn’t do it because his head is spinning and a part of him wants you to know that he’s hurting and he’s regretting. 

You already hang up once he’s calmed down.

And it’s thirty minutes later someone knocks on his door, his eyes widening in shock when he finds you on the other side, seemingly running out of your place in a hurry because you simply have a jacket over your pajamas. 

“Are you okay?” You look up in worry, your hand already busy trying to see his temperature. It’s when you realize that Soonyoung has been looking at you in silence that it finally hits you that you’re not supposed to do this.

That he… he breaks up with you before you even begin dating and you’re probably out of your fucking mind for thinking that you should rush to him the moment you think he might need help.

Mistaking his silence as resentment, you quickly retract your hand and apologize. But before you can even turn away, Soonyoung pulls you into his place and closes the door and then wraps his arms around you.

You can’t even begin to comprehend what’s happening, but when you feel his body shaking and hear him trying to hide his tears on your shoulder, you decide it doesn’t matter.

For whatever reason, Soonyoung is hurting.

Whether he’s hurting because of you or some other reason, he’s hurting and he’s looking for comfort in you if the way he holds you so tight that it hurts a little and the smell of alcohol on him says anything.

You hug him back and Soonyoung cries harder. 

[ - - - ]

©wonwoonlight – all rights reserved. I don’t allow any reposting, translation, and any other kind of redistribution of this fic. Please tell me if you’re aware of anyone doing this without my permission.

A/N: wow been so long since i wrote for him???

#soonyoung drabble #soonyoung scenarios #seventeen angst #seventeen au #seventeen scenarios #khione.fics #hoshi angst #hoshi scenarios #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenario #soonyoung angst #seventeen oneshot #hoshi oneshot

[kinokoshoujoart]

is it really toxic yuri if she doesn’t demand you cut off your fingers for her happiness???

”You have given me gifts over 10,000 times. Congratulations!” haha happy wife happy life…. (my fingers are stumps)

as some of you may or may not have realized i am powerless to the siren call of the ultimate devilish blond Harvest Moon Scum Man, and given that the Japanese version of DS Cute gives you TWO saveslots and TWO hands and the ability to to be in a literal toxic lesbian best friendrriage with ultimate devilish mischievous blonde Harvest Moon Scum Woman i have no choice but to meet all of the Witch Princess’s super reasonable honey do list!!

so one of those fun little non negotiable requests from majo-sama is that you need to give her presents 10,000 times before she’ll even consider marrying you, even if you meet all the marriage requirements!

i don’t mean 10,000 items total— even if you give her a stack of 99 items, it only counts as +1 towards the “items given to witch” counter. you have to give her 10,000 items individually…

in normal gameplay (giving her 1 gift a day, accounting for the holidays when her house is closed) you’ll eventually reach 10,000 gifts!…in your 95th year!

you COULD give her 100 gifts a day every day and knock it out in less than a year, and this was my strategy at first! i quickly realized adding another tedious daily chore to a pile of tedious daily chores slowed the game loop to a crawl and splitting items out was really fucking annoying actually

on the other hand, in 5 IRL hours, you can just get it all done in one visit to her house and never worry about it ever again.

“wow, that sounds like a really great use of my limited time on god’s green earth! how can i too win my future wife’s heart through button mashing my fingers into a pulp?” you ask?

˚✧₊⁎optimized pro gamer technique for breaking your fingers yuri style!!٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶⁎⁺˳✧༚

you will need

dog (each time you show your pet, this adds +1 to the gift counter the same way a gift would)

the bottom screen should be the map screen (reduces loading time between conversations compared to having your rucksack open)

cast endurance on fingers (wait this is redundant, you saw yuri in the title…)

ideal but not required

sometimes when you enter her house, she’s facing the side and her walk cycle never starts. it’s great if you get this glitch because then you can just stand in place for the entire duration without having to look at the screen, and even like watch a movie or whatever while you do all this, instead of accidentally dropping your dog every time she walks to the other bookshelf

if you’re wondering “wait, doesn’t Witch Princess hate dogs and love cats? why are you showing her your dog?” you are absolutely correct! she yells at you to get that stupid beast away from her every time you show your dog to her! her FP goes down by 3 each time! however, since her response to the dog is shorter than her response to the cat, you end up saving like .6 seconds per conversation, saving over 1.5 hours total, so the dog is what she gets

anyway, in true Karen HM64 tradition, after being repeatedly harassed by having a dog she isn’t fond of shoved in her face ten thousand times in a row for like five hours straight, naturally this makes her want to marry you! who said good old fashioned courtly love is dead?!

* as a small note, if you care enough to keep track and give her an actual gift at the 10th, 100th, 1000th, and 10000th mark, you’ll get 4 of the limited Witch Photos early on, which each give you +1 sweet sweet farm degree points every day… honestly that’s not much, but the pain of being told “your hands are full soooo no reward for you lmaoooo sucks to be you” was too much to bear, so i kept track and used a normal present for the 10th, 100th, 1000th, and 10000th…

#my pony has TWO HANDS and they are both MANGLED!!! #i’m normal about hmds i play hmds in. a normal way #i have a walkthrough that i wrote for my own playthroughs because i like to do things in a certain order #half tempted to post it sometime to see if anyone has more efficient ways of doing things #queue tea pie #bokumono #harvest moon #harvest moon ds cute #harvest moon ds #hmds #hmds cute #witch princess #hmds witch princess

[ihavemanyhusbands]

"he enjoyed getting under your skin just as much as you liked getting under his." Oof, first of all!! Was this closing sentence unbelievably suggestive or was it just me?? 😭

May i also add that i LIIIVE for the hotheaded young woman with the grumpy old yet vicious man who normally takes no shits but somehow has a soft spot for this young lady trope?? The romcom of it all! The underlying sexual tension!!

Like imagine the next morning they're having a small breakfast at the motel and this busty blonde working at the cafeteria gives Duncan some extra pancakes and flirts with him, even going so far as giving him her room number. The reader feels livid but tries to brush it off but of course Mr Retired Girthmaster notices and teases her about it lmaooo 🤭 all while wanting to do something about the reader's angry pouty lips and flushed cheeks

RETIRED GIRTHMASTER 😭😭😭😭 im sobbing lmaoooo im glad ur liking it!! The way i see it rn its like, a non canon prequel to the black kaiser’s nightmare hahahaha they secretly want each other sososososo bad UGH

———

Duncan muttered a quick thank you to the waitress as she refilled his coffee. He was focused on his food, studiously ignoring the prominent cleavage near his head.

You raised both eyebrows in half amusement, half irritation, smiling tightly as she refilled yours. You showed perhaps a little too much teeth as you asked her for the check, and she scurried off with one last glance at your companion.

“If she’d stood any closer, she would’ve poked your eye right out,” you said, pouring creamer in your coffee. “Those are a hazard.”

Duncan let out a small huff. “I hadn’t even noticed.”

“Oh please, she’s been pushing her tits out at you any time she’s come around. And don’t tell me she hasn’t been a little too present,” you continued with a scoff. “No shitty diner worth its salt has such attentive service.”

He observed you for a moment, breaking out into a smug grin. He said nothing, though, which only made you angrier as he casually shoveled a syrupy piece of pancake into his mouth.

“What?” You snapped.

“Nothing,” he said, not looking at you but still grinning a little.

“Tell me!” You urged, vindictively swiping the piece of hashbrown he was going to grab with your fork.

You ate it angrily and he shook his head with a chuckle.

“It’s kind of adorable when you get jealous,” he said, crossing his arms. “You get all wound up, like a little chihuahua.”

You gasped, appalled. “I’m not fucking jealous.”

The waitress reappeared then, leaving the check on the table. Duncan grabbed it and immediately showed you the paper. She had written her number and name at the bottom, a little heart drawn next to them.

He chuckled as your mouth thinned into a grim line, but you shrugged, trying to seem fully unaffected.

“I don’t care, do whatever you want, but you can’t fuck her in our room,” you said all too casually.

He snorted. “What makes you think I want to fuck her?”

You glared at him, crossing your arms over your chest stubbornly. He held your gaze for a moment, as if trying to convey something meaningful, but then he looked away.

Whatever the message was, you pointedly decided to ignore it…. For the time being.

———

#duncan vizla x reader #duncan vizla fanfiction #the black kaiser x reader #polar fanfiction #minors dni

[songmingisthighs]

what about dad!mingi or dad!yunho getting in an heated argument with pregnant!reader because of the children? the escalation in so quick that reader starts to have painful contractions and may go into labour.

ooooh i can get in on this

just to be clear, i'm not open to requests but if anything entices me, I'll try to make something

but tbh I got an idea after reading this. Wooyoung and his daughter trying to induce labour on his wife who's 3 days PAST due date by conducting a bunch of experiments lmaoooo

° . ° • ○ • ° . ° • ○ • ° . ° • ○ • ° . ° • ○ • ° . ° • ○ • ° . ° • ○ • ° . ° • ○ • ° . ° • ○ • ° . °

[17.35] yunho × pregnant!reader

"You're not listening to me!" Yunho exclaimed as he muss up his hair out of frustration.

"I am! I so fucking am Yunho!" you replied, equally loud as he. Yunho exhaled sharply as he rubbed at his face harshly, "No, you're not because if you are, you'd stay put and stay rested!," he pointed out.

You had just gotten back from grocery shopping and once Yunho saw how sweaty and out of breath you are, he immediately went straight into panic mode. It wasn't that big of a deal. You couldn't wait until he comes back home to accompany you and you simply don't want to have to worry about Yunho forgetting what you need. So you simply went by yourself. On the bus. While pregnant with twins. And disregarding doctor's orders to stay in and rest because twin pregnancies are very tricky, a lot of things could happen in such a short span of time.

But what do doctors know? They tend to be wrong.

With his arms crossed in front of his chest, Yunho stared at you in disbelief, "You're due in two weeks and you know what the doctors said. Twins tend to come early and with your pregnancy being high risk, it's not stupid to fear that you might give birth in the cereal aisle of a grocery store," he scolded. You rolled your eyes before plopping onto the couch to give your feet some rest they really need. "You think I'm not aware of that? But I'm not reckless, okay? I know my limits and let's be honest here, the doctors said I need bed REST not bed CONFINEMENT," you scoffed. Yunho raised an eyebrow at you, "Really? Sex jokes??" "It wasn't a sex joke! You're just dirty-minded!" "Well, I'm sorry for having pent-up sexual frustration! I haven't had sex in four months and it's driving me crazy! It's bad enough I had to hold myself back, but with your boobs grown much bigger things have been much, MUCH more difficult!" he groaned.

Hearing him made you confused. Your eyebrows furrowed and your arms crossed in front of your chest, mirroring him, "Excuse me? No one told you to not have sex with me. I'm pregnant with children, Yunho, not a freaking bomb," you pointed out at him. "I know that! But the doctors told me to be careful and I just can't help but worry that I might hurt the babies!" he confessed. Yunho had been holding onto his fear for a while, he had never told you how much he blamed himself for putting so much burden on you and your body. But the frustration, anxiety, and fear messed with his brain to the point that he couldn't think clearly.

You both were silent for a moment, letting both of your words sink into each other's brains. Yunho broke the silence first with a chuckle, catching your attention. "You know, this is so you. You don't seem too worried about having babies. BABIES, (y/n), two at the same time! We have a LOT to worry about and you don't seem to be as concerned as me! Like when I started babyproofing our home, you told me I'm months too early to do it," Yunho couldn't help but let his fears out now. He opened the gate, he's gonna let anything out.

"Okay, first of all, you started babyproofing THE MOMENT we found out I was pregnant. Our babies still looked like tadpoles when you went all crazy," you huffed. Yunho glared at you with his left eye twitching, "Don't just call them babies, call them by their names," he said which made you roll your eyes, "Yeah, yeah, Yujin and Yeeun, whatever. But don't you see? It's not that I was too lax or anything, you're just too uptight! You worry about things you shouldn't even worry about yet! And for fuck's sake, Yunho we're having babies and not performing brain surgery. Babies are easy! You feed them, burp them, change their diapers, and rock them to sleep, it's not rocket science!" you were talking so fast, your brain barely caught onto the words your mouth let slip.

Due to talking so fast, you felt yourself getting a little out of breath again. You had to do your breathing exercises just to calm the two babies in you who had started to become agitated. "Look," you started once you calmed down slightly, "I'm not worried because I know we got this, okay? We've babysat Juri and Junhyung when Hongjoong was busy, we've taken care of a sick Sungchan when Seonghwa was stuck in his schedule, and for the love of god, we've taken care of drunk San, Mingi, and Wooyoung enough to be prepared for 4 am feedings and fussy babies," you pointed out, listing the things you've both done together to calm Yunho down. "So whatever this is," you motioned his whole body with your hand to make a point, "Is not about me and my parental instincts or whatever it is you're accusing me of. So you're gonna help me up so I can storm away to the toilet because these babies have your big heads and they're pressing onto my bladder," you said as you reached your hands out for him to help pull you up.

With a roll of his eyes, Yunho helped pull you up to your feet. He might be frustrated at you, but he's not cruel. He carefully took your arms in his and slowly pulled you to your feet. He couldn't say anything before you had walked (waddled) away.

"Where are you going?" Yunho asked. You cringed as you felt pressure in your stomach. Without turning around, you answered him, "To see a man about a horse," you spat. Unsure, Yunho stared at your retreating figure in confusion, "What?" he asked. You exhaled sharply and stopped in your steps to turn and look at him halfway, "I need to make my bladder gladder, Yunho. I told you I need to pee."

Just as you were about to take a step forward, a sharp pain pierced your stomach and you crumbled to the floor in pain.

Seeing this, Yunho's eyes widened and he immediately dove to your side. "(y/n)!" he exclaimed, hands shooting forward to support your head and stomach. He situated you to lay down on the floor with your head supported by his arm.

The shooting pain in your stomach had become unbearable and you were clearly in distress. "I- it hurts Yunho, i-it- oh, go-d," you winced. You were shaking your head, trying to shake the pain away but it was no use, the pain had become sharper and as the intensity increased, so does your worry. Thankfully, Yunho was quick on his feet and he called an ambulance to take you to the hospital.

As you both stayed in that position, you cradled in his arms and him holding you tightly while looking at each other, you both wordlessly came into an understanding that nothing else mattered at that moment. Suddenly, seeing you in pain after arguing in him trumped all of Yunho's other anxiety. He couldn't even remember what made him so frustrated with you in the first place. All that mattered now is that he's going to do anything and everything to make sure you and his babies are safe and sound.

taglist :

@rdiamond2727 @bobateastay @kodzukein @phenomenalgirl9 @skzatzloveismonsterous @memorymonster @forapollosol @dreamlesswonder86 @maddiebabyxoxo @imababywolf @do-you-actually-care @marievllr-abg @ilsedingsx @wasteitonserendipity @bbymatz @noonaishere @jo-hwaberry @honeyhwaaa @ateezourstars @yoonjunshi @yoongiigolden @camillelafaye @charreddonuts @jcngh0-hq @kpopnightingale @starryunho @atinct @cutie-wooyo @mirror-juliet @hyuckilstan @jayb17 @multihoe-net @kpoplover718 @imswitchbabemox @haatohwa @youngestdelacour

@seonghwarizon @chloepurpy

#smt answer #anon ask #ateez #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez scenario #ateez imagine #ateez timestamp #ateez timestamps #ateez au #dad!ateez au #dad!au #kpop #kpop scenario #kpop scenarios #kpop imagine #kpop imagines #kpop timestamp #kpop timestamps #dad!yunho #jung yunho #yunho angst #ateez yunho #jeong yunho #yunho scenarios #yunho #yunho fanfic #smt scenarios #smt imagine #smt timestamp

[nakanotamu]

Rossy got fired from stardom??????????

LMAOOOO I was just about to post "lmao Rossy got fired" and then I saw this yeah apparently he got fired after the show last night. I never got around to writing that post about the management issues so I guess I'l try and summarize some relevant points before people panic

Okay so Rossy was off of booking since some time last year. We don't know for sure but my guess is that All Star Grand Queendom was his last show as booker, based on the belt going to Tam apparently being his decision and the timing of when stuff started to fall apart very shortly after that.

He was highly critical of the last president (who had been booking) once that guy got fired - and the issues with him were more than just booking. This was the stuff Giulia talked about. Like the schedule he booked was way too grueling on the wrestlers with non-stop big matches & shows back to back to back, and he would book matches just out of the blue without paying any attention to the stories the wrestlers were trying to tell, where Rossy's style was to just let the wrestlers throw out story threads themselves and then book what he thought would sell out of what they wanted to do. He also just was an idiot and didn't seem to think particularly highly of wrestling in the first place, pushing tons and tons of product tie-ins and advertising shit and the fucking NFT shit and. Yeah he sucked

However despite being highly critical of the last guy once he was gone, Rossy also said he didn't comment on the decisions he was making. He also may have been the one who decided who won or lost in the period before the new president came in, but from what's been made public at least, as soon as he came in he took over, so Stardom since whenever that was like the start of December has been the new president in charge.

So what I'm trying to say is, at least creatively, this probably isn't actually a huge change for Stardom compared to the past roughly a year of the product. People freaking out that the booker is just suddenly gone, he apparently hasn't been the booker for a while already now anyway. If you didn't notice a change in booking twice last year you probably won't notice this either.

So, yeah, Rossy did get fired. Bye bitch, it would be nice if this meant Sonny is on the way out too. Rossy is absolutely fucking not the guy who saved joshi wrestling or whatever the fuck narrative he & a lot of western wrestling media have been trying to present him as for years now. This probably isn't going to lead to a massive shift in Stardom's booking compared to what it's already been for months, and just as a fan we have no way of knowing what else this is going to impact, because it's hard to tell how much influence he even had for the past year, which was admittedly bad but more recently imo showing signs of turning around.

I think it's worth pointing out that one of the things that drove me off of both Reddit and Twitter wrestling fandom is that whenever shit like this happens everybody's gotta be a fucking insider or whatever and we don't. Know. Anything. But further than that it's not our fucking problem. We don't work for Bushiroad and we don't know anybody involved. We don't NEED to worry about what this means for The Business or whatever the fuck because that doesn't matter to us. I care about the roster being treated well and the product being one I am enjoying, and Rossy already couldn't prevent both of those things from not happening last year, so obviously he's not gonna be the difference maker.

My concern if I have one though is mostly the roster. If people are loyal enough to him to start jumping ship that would really suck. If the rumours that are already going around that he was poaching people for a potential NXT Japan pan out in any way that would REALLY suck. Even if the entire roster went I'm not going to watch a WWE product or even a show that isn't women in every match. So I guess as ever all we can do is wait and see.

#Stardom

[crimswnred]

good night people of the world I'm here to bring you the long awaited

LITG TEMPTING FATE VOLUME IV: thoughts and prayers

first of all, whatever jack and sophie have to say we rdgaf because 1) he wanted me 2) she wanted jin and 3) jin and i are a couple

this challenge could have been replaced by the mean tweets challenge and it would've kept the same purpose and still be more enjoyable

why would I know and, above all, why would I care about who finished the juice?

I literally don't care if he's a player (he's not, this is fusebox), why do they keep shoving that in my throat. If he's a player let me be PLAYED.

lmao true friends as if me and Sophie don't fight every five seconds

Sophie shut up lol

she was not only flirting with Tyler but with Jin too and I bet if any of them had given her the chance, she would've kissed them too

imagine cheating on Oakley with Jack like bffr

see, Jack, the thing is. I want the hideaway and I want the villa to burn down in chaos so like, I don't see how that stupid plan will work for me??

my fucking game BROKE and restarted

anyways, moving on.

should I be messy and flirt with Theo even though his girl just told me she would like to fuck me tonight if I'm down?

oh, yes, yes, I should

season 4 compliment off gets a sequel

when you're the only one serving cunt at a party

LMAOOOO THE LAST OPTION????

MC is so messy I love her omfg is she season 1 MC little sister or something

Emel and Oakley were so cute with the eye contact stuff awwww 🥺 maybe they don't hate each other actually

that's not awkward at all!!

love that Jin is always saying stuff he just can't shut up and you know what he's so real for that

why do they always make the villa dad the cheater like do fusebox writers have some kind of father figure trauma or smth???

anyways lol Theo I don't actually like you I'm just messy sorry I hope this doesn't come back to bite my ass in the future

ofc me and Jin were the most voted couple AND TO THE HIDEAWAY WE GO!

Jesus Christ I thought they were targeting this for younger audiences? did they realise kids don't own credit cards?

we are going back to our roots

the scenes are getting better

anyways this was fun and all but like can something cool happen??

a bunch of drama that was settled in like half an episode, some tea about pre-game drama and a bunch of gems wasted for nothing. but the moments with Jin were cute and now I'm like 👀 at Theo

#litg #love island the game #litg tempting fate #litg season 8 #litg s8 #bia plays season 8

[emblazons]

hELLO do you have any fun specific hopes/theories/headcanons for st5?

HELLO STRANGER 😂

Honestly I am not like super headcanon forward as a watcher because I think I have expectations trust issues from other television and therefore stick to what I can see on screen before speculating, BUT!

Headcanons + some things I would love to see explored (that aren’t just aggressive amounts of pining byler)?

The whole “Will is suppressed in his queerness being attached to soteria/suppression of powers” is like. 11/10 concept imo. It goes along with horror history so well (shout out @pinkeoni for that analysis) and plays so well into the whole relating to “Alan Turing” bit that we were introduced to start of S4, given his history as a gay man.

re, the last point: the contrast in queerness between Mike and Will being explored as someone who shows more blatant attraction to men but struggles to accept it as an identity versus someone who accepts their identity while suppressing their attraction (by outside forces or not) is also a dynamic I think would be cool to explore. I am not an ace Will truther at all but. I do think he shies away from his own sexuality a lot in a way they don’t do with Mike.

I really want “samfro caught on mount doom together while the rest of the fellowship fights an army” byler vibes—something about El and Lucas as Aragorn & Legolas with Dustin (Gimli) and Erica (Merry/Pippin) while Will struggles with feeling alone carrying the heavy burden of a connection to Vecna? Some “I can’t carry it for you, but I can carry you” heroism from Mike? El getting a moment to reunite with Max (Arwen) at the hand of Lucas, just like in Return of the King? Fucking mint lmao

I need scenes of Max in whatever place she’s still alive in like I need oxygen. Working from “the inside” to do exposition on Henry + the UD while she’s in a coma while the party sorts through it in Hawkins feels like such a phenomenal writing opportunity I’ll be desperately sad if they don’t explore it. I hope they include some elements of like. The duality of presence a la The Talisman in that given Lucas was reading it to her in the hospital? But 🤷🏽‍♀️

GIVE ME TIME FKERY OR GIVE ME DEATH. I know it’s pretty much guaranteed at this point but. I need Mr. Clarke back stat, with some convoluted ass theory explained on a paper plate again. I need the most elaborate UD reality just, absolutely borderline nonsensical lore for like a full episode so I can watch this series back again and see it from SECOND ONE (or minute 8:15) and giggle like a schoolgirl knowing the duffers really are smart/the haters were wrong.

I want more Wheelers! I know Nancy is central to the supernatural given she was the only other one pulled in by Vecna and not killed—just sent as a messenger—but. I have so many Wheeler and Creel thoughts at this point I don’t know where to start, but. They are the PERFECT family for exploring picture-perfection against horror themes (just like the Creels) and I want it. Like “don’t care how, I want it now” level focus on them, along with their Byers.

I said it before but: an exploration of motherhood as a theme makes so much sense to me, and it seems to be important to The Duffers too, so. I want it.

Kinda want RoVickie as the couple who introduces the idea of the supernatural + queerness v Hawkins element at the start of the season, and for byler to be the ones who “end it.” I think that would be a fascinating way to parallel them more, though…I haven’t much thought this through.

If they don’t make Finn Wolfhard sob his little eyes out this season I’m going to feel betrayed. I need him like. Noah level pressed at least once next season, for the culture (Finn said he wanted to do more dramas. Let him defeat the bad actor allegations here so they let him LMAOOOO)

That’s all I can think of for now! I’m sure there are more, but. Those were the firsts that came to mind haha.

Thanks for the ask!

#the me tag #st5 #asks #byler #stranger things #magentamee #because I know it was you LMAO #st headcanons

[isdalinarhot]

Okay here’s my haute new modern au concept. So Rathalas is some bullshit where Dalinar does a hit and run and gets away with it but the person he hits and runs does not press charges but the guilt consumes him AND ALSO him and Evi get divorced and Evi moves back to Washington state (modern au Rira) and Adolin and Renarin elect to stay with Dalinar in Miami (modern au Kholinar) because 1. They have family there that they are really close to (Dalinar is going to rely on Gavilar and Navani pretty heavily for, like, babysitting and stuff. You know. For Reasons) 2. They have friends there 3. Adolin and Renarin go to a really fancy private k-8 school and Renarin is there on Gifted Kid Scholarship so it would really be a waste for him to move across the country. Okay. You with me so far? Good.

Newly divorced, Dalinar has Sadeas move in because surprise surprise like 60% of the reason Dalinar and Evi got a divorce is because Dalinar was fucking Sadeas on the side. Now, I’m almost positive gay marriage wasn’t legal in Florida back then so they don’t get Married but they are openly a “couple” although their relationship is very much still like 80% physical above all else. Adolin makes like 20 posts a day on his. God what social media was popular with middle schoolers in 2010. Facebook? He makes 20 posts a day on his Facebook account that are like I HATE MY STEPDAD!!!!!!!‼︎ because he and Sadeas have beef. Renarin is just sort of chilling through all this cuz he’s 8 and he has more important shit to worry about like getting enough accelerated reading points to make it to the class pizza party. Does private school do accelerated reading and/or pizza parties? Whatever.

I think there’s a period of time near the end of the washed up dilf era where Adolin is like ENOUGH my dad is drunk so often that he’s never there for me and my stepdad is literally Sadeas so FUCK this I’m moving in with Uncle Gavilar and Aunt Navani!!!‼︎ but that’s not much better because Gavilar and Navani fucking hate each other and argue all the time so there’s just always yelling. Plus he has to share a room with Elhokar which fucking sucks because Elhokar is a shit roommate. That lasts like a year until Gavilar dies of some sort of rapid onset rapidly fatal cancer and fucking dies

After that Dalinar goes to rehab and genuinely turns his life around (with a little help from Cultivation lmaoooo) and from then on things with him and Sadeas are. Strained. But Dalinar really wants to Make It Work. Adolin moves back in with Dalinar but still makes posts on his tumblr every day about hating his stepdad. Navani tries to hit on Dalinar frequently and this makes Dalinar genuinely uncomfortable. Eventually Sadeas has a heart attack and Adolin is there but doesn’t call 911 and so Sadeas dies and it’s technically Adolin’s fault but who cares

#luke.txt #purple dragon jungle juice #idk whats going on here #long post

[thesolotomyhan]

ismael “el mayo” zambada nsfw alphabet

a/n: there will be one day when i will stop loving him but today is not that day nor is it near because his stupid ass smile gets me everytime and i hate it and him y me enamoro mas cada vez i cry but here it is i hope you guys enjoy this because this is def one of my favorite things ive written

warnings: nsfw, p*rn whatever you want to call it but  holy sh*t this mf is 7.6k words long, lmaoooo get comfortable mis bebes (the word count keeps going up everytime i write a new one lol) 

a-aftercare (what theyre like after sex)

hasta tiemblo thinking about it all because while i feel like he isnt that into it,, he would make an exception for you :( like let me explain before you blow up on me ,,, because ive always kind of pictured him as someone who could give less of a fuck about how the other person feels? he’s just there to be egoistic if he has ever had anyone before you and i just,,,, i picture him flipping all of his values and own rules right tf upside down when he meets you :) and it definitely applies to aftercare :) because i feel like before you,,he wouldnt seem to care enough to even try it,, its out the window on sight, but of course :) when he meets you :) his chula :) he starts to lean more into the idea of aftercare and i have kind of two ideas/ways it can go,, because i can def see him being like the prepared one ? like he would have almost all of your necessities on the nightstand right next to you so all he has to do is reach over and hand it to you, just being the type that’s prepared as in him not wasting a second if he even senses you need something,,, because he’s getting up and getting it for you or secondly i can see him being the type of being more of a guy that when you both come,, after a long session,, him just draping his body down on top of you,, letting you tiredly run your hands through his hair and back,,, him lightly feathering you in kisses on your shoulder just basking in the little aftershocks your body does post-orgasm,,, and just giving you a small kiss to your collarbone,, cocky smile on his face but with a light glint in his eyes ,, and just moving to lay beside you,, pulling your body on top of his ,, moving your head under his chin and on his chest while he caresses your back, kissing the top of your head like “estas bien?” as he holds you to him,, just wanting to make sure youre ok but of course if you even think about asking him about getting something for you,, his ass is just placing one last kiss on your shoulder :)) giving you a small “ey” and moving to get up to get whatever you asked for :))) te trata como reina pues :) and i cry to that sorry i am an easy bitch to please

b-body (favorite body part)

i could go all day long giving you guys the human anatomy and why its his favorite part because he would love everything about you but ill just settle and give you all this piece of information because,,,, legs,, legs,,, tus piernas hermosas mis reinas,,, hear me out alright,,, because whether is the way they look when you’re walking or :) him placing his hand on your thighs when your both seated next to eachother at some dinner party,, the way they look underneath a flow-y sundress or when youre rolling up stockings on your legs if you like those ,,, or :) when he has you spread out by your thighs for him,, or even him holding them when hes thrusting into you,, but i can just sense he would at least have some sort of fixation with your legs im sorry i only enforce the rules here because for a quick detour off of nsfw,,, i just see him somehow always gravitating towards them for some reason,,, like i mentioned maybe its when youre both at some party, dinner in some fancy place or whatever,, but when youre both sitting at a table,, him having your chair right bumped up next to his to have you close :) i can just see him (and i fall in love i swear) when i imagine him placing his hand on your thigh :) perhaps letting his fingers gently massage you there or just hold your inner thigh if he wants to and maybe its just so he can at least touch some part of you in a normal pda matter or maybe its because he just loves the feeling of them you know? or something else i can imagine,, is when hes at home with you after he just got there after being out on the boats all day,,, you giving :) him his plate :) para que come :) (domesticity i cry) but him loving to have you sit on his lap :) while he tells you about his day :) as he eats :) fuck im sorry but that shine in his eyes coming up on his face and brightening it all up everytime he looks upon you :(( one of his hands would be holding you by your thighs so you dont slip off ,, as he lets his thumb gently caress the side of your leg hnng can you guys tell im shaking ? or to add one last example for you guys and be domestic because im soft for shit like this,, but imagining :( him being on the couch with your legs propped up on his lap, and him absentmindedly just running his hand over your soft skin,, maybe youre both just watching whatevers on the television while hes talking to you but for some reason i love the image of how he doesnt stop his hands from running all over your legs as he looks at you in some lovesick smile,, tugging you by your legs so you can almost straddle him if you want but it’s such a soft moment if you can imagine it and ugh sorry to spill what i just said

but ooooOH of course i couldnt move on just yet because that just wouldnt be fair now would it,, and to start off my little adventure here,, im formally apologizing once again because i just have to bring up the sundress again because you wearing sundresses around this mf when he has this problem of not being self controlling of himself around you when he sees you either a) all dolled up and b) by showing off and your legs :) its a dangerous fuvking game youre playing but nothing beats the sight of you walking out of your shared bedroom wearing a sundress to wherever hes at in the house or when :) you come out :) by his boat :) to give him lonche :) because the way this mf would straight up from the start of seeing you zone in on your legs,, teasing ass smile and look he would be giving you as he gets up and heads towards you :) moving his arms around you :) planting a kiss on your lips and just running his hands down your body just kills me and not to kill the build up but i just know he would live for the sight of :) seeing your sundress all bunched up around your waist,, but it keeps falling down and covering your upper thighs when he fucks up into you when he has you propped up against something :) like the desperate kind of sex you know? where he would have his hand gripping your hip,, bringing the lower part of your sundress up so he can hold it with that same hand just so its out of the way,, and he can be able to see your pussy swallow him full, but with the way your body bounces after every thrust,, your dress keeps falling back down :) which only makes him :) groan out and pump into you rougher and rougher,, your breasts spilling out from the top part of your dress :))) im sorry and just one last detail,,, but of course in our old fashioned missionary :) he would just love to continuously hold your legs apart by your thighs everytime you try to close them around him when he thrusts into you :) just loving to hold onto the underside of your thighs and press them back into your chest as he continues to plow into you :) not sure if he wants to focus on the way your becoming more and more delirious as he pushes his cock into you while he holds your legs open for him :) or the way youre entire body bounces along with every thrust he does :)) or :) cuando te hace el amor :) the way i imagine him basically having his body draped over you,, one of your arms placed on his back as you hold onto him,, your other hand holding onto the back of his neck where it meets his hair :) the both of you messily trying to kiss but both of your heavy breathing interrupting the two of you :) him having one os his hands holding one of your legs,, hiking it further up up so you can rest it around his torso :) as he slowly but roughly pumps into you :))) hnnng wow

c-cum (anything to do with cum)

finish anywhere? yeah anywhere,,, both outside and inside of you ,, this man does not care nor discriminate as long as you make/allow him to come :) and mainly my strongest point for this reasoning is because i imagine he would have some sort of self control/awareness when he fucks you, like how do i say this,,, te tiene respeto to be front about it,, like if you make it known you don’t want him to cum inside of you he has that shit sitting in the back of his mind while he’s deep inside of you no matter how pussy drunk you have him, he’s able to hold himself back you know? :))) but ofc if you don’t mind :) or if it’s ok with you :) he would absolutely love the feeling of coming inside of you :) as your squeezing around him :))) ,, being able to see the sight of his cum dripping out of your soft pussy :) but that’s just me :)

d-dirty secret (a dirty secret of theirs) 

ok lets start off with something- it’s something about him that gives me voyeriusm and im not talking about him outright fucking you in front of someone sitting 2 inches away that’s able to see the whole thing, so no dont look at me like that and stop thinking about that because what i mean by that is he basically likes you to be as loud as you want when he fucks you, i think i talked about this before but i think he would not give a second thought/f*ck if there’s people or his guys in the house/around when he’s fucking you,, instead it boosts his ego towards the roof that he can coax you to produce so many noises that it’s too hard for you to keep quiet which just in turn makes him get an even cockier attitude to those around him,(omg please dont get me started on the thought of him having the most dirtbag look in his eyes,, cocky attitude plastered high onto his fucking forehead if he does this prior and knowing he would have some bum associate / one of his men needing to get him some information,, and they walk into the house and your high pitched moans are the first thing they hear :) and not long after :) his ass coming down :) clearly fucking sex drunk from you :) but ready for business talk while you rest up in the bedroom :) hngg) , im not sure if theres a specific name for this,, but thats basically what i think would be his “dirty secret”,, because he would never outright voice it out loud to you that you being as loud as you want while others are around gets him going,, he kind of just encourages you to do it for him during the deed you know? you just unknowingly indulge him you feel?

e-experience (is he experienced or not?)

soo just to check in with everyone once again and make sure we’re all on the same page as i am ? we have all seen the cocky fuvkin attitude this man carries right? how egoistic he can be at times?? thats the type of vibe i always seem to pick up whenever i rewatch any of his scenes ,, right ok,,, so it just makes sense ?? that this man has had his fair share of viejas ,, but with no feelings tied to any of them?and i know we don’t actually openly see him with anyone throughout s3,,, but damn it’s just the aura i get from him that makes me believe hes medio usado , for the streets,, thats the big thing here that i see him as being ,,, like especially that saying he’s always going on about ? “es que me gusta ser mi propio patron” head ass - that in itself just ties the knot for me on him since for me it means that this man is his own self , hes independent ,, and does not give a single fuck about anyones feelings besides his socios because that’s a whole different page ok? pero tu? su reina?? HIS CHULA?? the one who turned his whole sappy love life upside fuckin down in an instant and made him feel things hes never felt before ? yeah goodbye ,,he lays everything down for you if you even think of it because te trata como his reina del imperio, wow sorry to steer off of our main topic here but yeahh hes had his experience reached to a good level :) so he would :) definitely :) know the best :) way to get you on edge :) stimulate you right off the bat :) and just,, be a quick learner as soon as he catches up on what exactly you like,, he can just pick up on anything :) and :)) know like an expert on the first second :) where you like to be touched and held :)

f-favorite position 

my god- i feel like i could come up with so many different scenarios for each different position i can think about for him because i feel like hes open to a lot of them and i feel like he for sure likes more than 1 position and i just cant definitively pinpoint the number 1 favorite because hes open to it all sorry ,, but ohh this will be fun ,, i know i could easily list missionary because WOW right? so what sue me im a simple creature and i just love the thought of this position with mayo,, because you cant lie and tell me its not one of the most intimate positions because for 1. its a great position for the both of you guys to see the other in such an close space and 2) this mf,, mi mayo,, will make this position feel like anything other than missionary when the mood is set right like :) bending your legs until they almost reach your chest (like bending you right in f*vkin half ) or as far apart as your legs can go or him wrapping both of your legs around his waist,, the upper part of body still laying back on the bed and him just pumping into you just so he can get that angle and hit it over and over again inside of you,, him being able to see your entire body react in time with each snap of his hips into you or the way you arch into him when he drags his hand down the front of your body,, :) gripping onto your bouncing breasts as he slams into you,,, his eyes being able to see the way you would roll your eyes back into your head,, the pretty moans of his name spilling past your lips as you just helplessly lay there,, your hands not knowing if they want to grip the bedsheets every time he roughly thrusts back into your sopping pussy or if they want to dig into the skin on his chest to let out some of your frustrations as tears form in your eyes,, god im just hnng- and to not end things here,, maybe sometimes :) this position can move into something like :) him moving your legs to fully wrap around his waist,,, his hands moving under your back and pushing you up so your kind of sitting up with him :))) one of your arms coming to wrap around his shoulders :) your other hand planting itself onto his bicep (hnng can you just imagine the way his shoulders and biceps would be fuvkin flexing as he holds you) :) digging your nails into him while that same arm of his is holding onto your ass,, helping you bounce along with his thrusts :) his other hand is just dragging itself up and down your back :) you throwin your head back from the new angle hes pumping into you from :)) him moving his head down towards your bouncing breasts,, wrapping his lips around one of your nipples,, :) your moans becoming louder and louder as he rapidly pumps into you,, your hand thats around his shoulders coming to tangle into his hair, making him groan into you and making his grip on your ass become tighter, :) slamming yor hips down onto his pelvis :) the both of you trying to kiss the other but you cant help but spill out your whines and squeeze around him as you look down on him - wow ok um ill just leave this -

but again of course , im adding in a bit more because i have a feeling one of you guys might attack me if i leave it as i have this because missionary might be too simple so here para que no se me enojen because something else i feel like he would do is spooning :)) like in the mornings :) morning sex to be exact:))) where he would have your back to his chest :) essentially spooning you to him,,, one of his arms under you and being able to hold your breasts or travel up and hold your neck :) his other hand is holding one of your legs up :) so he can slide into you repeatedly easier, your soft moans mixing in with the sounds of his cock pumping into your slick pussy filling the room up, one of your hands would be reaching behind you :) and holding onto his hair when you feel him pepper kisses onto your neck :) you turning your head back occasionally to meet his mouth with your own,, hnng his hand thats on your breast :) moving to tweak your hardened nipple :)) his other hand that was supporting your leg, traveling down :) to your swollen clit :) wetly rolling it in between his fingers,, smiling against you when you break away from his lips to toss your head back,, your moans spilling out like the air you breathe :) and with the pinshe vista of mazatlan in front of you both :) i cant oh go- but also not me wanting to imagine how i know he would love to have you in that position, you know with your back to his chest but sitting up :) reverse cowgirl :))) but with this mirror thats propped up in front of you in your bedroom instead of the vista :) the thought of you being able to fully see how your pussy can take him full,, your breasts perfectly bouncing on time every time he thrusts up into you,, him holding your legs open :) one of his fingers :) playing with your clit :) and you being able to see his eyes :) through the mirror :) as you scrunch your face up from pleasure and how stimulating youre feeling from both the feeling of him and the view :)) hearing him groan out behind you when he feels you flutter around him :) and you throwing your head back against his shoulder,, his fingers just applying more and more pressure as he snaps his hips from roughly up into you,, him sucking little hickies onto your shoulder and along your neck :) praising you :) and just saying something like “su puta madre- mirame mi reina” wanting you to look back at him through the mirror :) im- him just encouraging you until you deliriously look up again only to lose all common sense and thought when you see him, again through the mirror,, and feel him and watch him :)) spread your pussy lips apart with his fingers :)) exposing yourself even more to him as he thrusts his cock up into your slick heat , an mesmerized look in his eyes as he watches you react :) small smirk on his face when he sees you scrunch your eyebrows together, you keening back into him again and im so sorRY woW

g-goofy (is he more serious or more humerous during the moment?) 

i see him not being too serious but not too goofy ya feel me ? i would say he’s definitely fuckin cocky all the time and there might be times he makes the both of your dreamily sex drunk minds smile lazily at eachother because of something he let slip out of his mouth or something,, but it’s all definitely heartfelt almost and in the moment passion, but never too much goofy-ness? it’s just right

i-intimacy (how are they during the moment?)

intimacyyy,, when it comes to you,,,,,, i def can see him leaning into his more intimate side ,, being so much more intimate than he would be with anyone else that exists in the world , eres special for him, especially if your relationship with him has gone on for a good while it just cranks it up even more,, i feel like other than him wanting to ruin you and see you walk funny for the next week which makes him get that even cockier attitude with everyone else,, it’s definitely something special for him to be able to let his walls down for once with you by being intimate and be able to tell you physically el nomas es para tu, and nothing will ever change that now, and so i feel like there will be days maybe specifically on some special occasion where he takes things slow for once and shows you how much he really does love you and how whipped you have him just to remind you where he stands with you :( because again as much as he tries to act all egoistic, it’s a drastic difference when it comes to you on the daily and he definitely tries to let you know that intimally when he can and doesn’t want to make you cockdumb-

j-jack off (does he jack off? how often etc)

ok,,, so sure maybe before you i could see him having his own time to himself and all,it’s definitely crossed his mind ,, but it wouldn’t be excessive nor it it be a regular occurrence ,, i have a feeling like before you it was more of little to none,, and i say that because i feel like he’s always so busy with his boat and negocios and all that that i feel like he wouldn’t take the time off to have time for himself, ? if you get what i mean ? but he’s definitely done it once or twice but it’s rare you know? i feel like he’d rather find some other method - or someone iykyk what i mean by that but when you do waltz into his life,, i just see him keeping the same vibe? he never / very rarely on the 0.01% does it because he has you now ,, you get his needs done and over-the-topped with so he sees no other method that can do that for him which includes even his own fist, so i see him as someone would would rather wait for any and all urges he may have until he has you with him, he doesn’t care for jacking off by himself

k-kink (one or more of their kinks)

hnnng i have already made a whole ass kink list for him so its tough for me to think of something else so I’ll just give you all this because listen, bondage,,, ,,\listen listen,,, mayo works on boats right,, its his front to cover up what he really does but hes continuously always working on his boat catching camarones,,, and we’ve seen him work on nets right? now im only reading the rules off to you guys so dont look at me because you cant tell me he doesnt know or at least an expert in tying knots because wow,, i just know he knows some special shit and if youre open to it :) best believe hes going to know the best way to tie you up :)) while he gets to fuck you :))) just- its such a sight for him to see you struggling :) not a single way for you to wiggle away from him :) when he has you spread out for him :) him chuckling when he gets you so desperate for him when he opens your legs for him,, slowly and agonizly thrusting his cock into you,, this thumb ghosting over your clit so him not giving you any buildup whatsoever even though youre throbbing around him,, the only thing you can really do as youre helplessly laying there is whine out to him,, trying to thrust your own hips up into him for any release while he just gives you the cockiet smirk ever and i cant do this byeE im about to -

l-location (favorite places to do the deed)

to be simple,,, i can always see him being intimate and doing the deed at home, probably even at almost any damn surface you can find hes probably had his way with you,, but best yet in your own shared room,, because only then does he actually 100% know no one is going to walk in and see what only he should be able to see ? he could care less how loud you want to be when youre both going at it at in your bedroom because as long as no one sees your body hes great,, i feel like he definitely likes the idea of privacy because then :) he can do as he pleases with you :) with no rush which is just fan-fucking-tastic for him, you know like take his time, and have his fun with you and the same for you,, its just a safe space basically for you both do to whatever you please,,, but obviously besides the comfort and “freedom” of your own shared bedroom which i feel 98% everything happens in there because its a place for sure no one can bother the two of you as ive said,, but :) i did mention “voyeuristic” vibes to an extent right ? wellll >:) i see no problem with him taking risks as hed like with you,,, loving to see the sight of either you or him whoever took the initiative to see the other crumble and try to be as quiet as possible so no one gets the clear idea of what you two are doing :) like he for sure has done it on his boat with you :),, at a party in some random but private place, but not private enough that either of you can make too much noise :) but yeah,, i can see him doing to do really almost any location if youre down, but leaning on the latter he likes doing it at home :)

m-motivation (what motivates them)

what gets him going? in all honesty, it does not take much for him when it comes to you,, something ive always pictured and imagined when it comes to him and getting him in the mood is the way you could look at him in a certain way and he’s forgetting whatever task hes at hand with and giving you his full attention,, or :) if you’re looking to get him all the way in until he’s making sure to absolutely ruin you by the first round is if you tease him, and you can definitely go down the road of wearing something skimpy and just going from there,, but it can also be you being more atrevida , giving him looks :) touching him “innocently” :) and then leaving him alone for the next hour like you didn’t just acknowledge him :) , so it takes little to no effort really to get him going,, he’s always down for you

n-no (something he wont do)

would hate to share you,, thats it,, or even the simple fact that someone looks at you for far too long/eating you up with their eyes you know? and yeah i feel like it goes for everyone because i keep seeing this pattern i do for this letter but its true, and it definitely applies to mayo here because he seems like the type to get bothered so quick he just doesn’t like to voice it or let it notice, and he just doesn’t ever like to admit he gets jealous to say the least on simple terms,, because i can just picture when some bum is eyeing you up or when someone is trying to talk you up into a more than friendly way,, this man would be lowkey throwing the harshest glare known to man at whoever is trying to take your time, his jaw starting to clench up,, and just trying to scoot you as close as possible to him just to quietly make it known your accompanied,, and i shit you not he probably starts to get a little more pda thrown out there like holding your hand, pecking the side of your head, maybe squeezing you tighter against him in the most nonchalant way to make sure you don’t get the hint he’s starting to get bothered,, lol and if you turn to look at him,, he’s back to normal, as cool as a cucumber and giving you a soft smile, and ugh him giving you an even bigger smile if you lean in to kiss him, boosting his attitude even more and once you turn around again, his fucking anger comes back but directed at whoever’s in front of you until he makes them uncomfortable heh, not wanting to descalate things into bigger shit because he doesn’t want that kind of attention you know? he kind of knows how to keep himself in check enough to not cause chaos ;) hnnnng but if you do :) try to push his buttons :) and entertain whoever it is :) is trying to talk you up :) best know the jealous sex :) is going to hit different :)) because he hates the idea of you being anyone else’s but his and i stand by my case :))))

o-oral (is he into oral? giving? recieving? 

both he is both go ahead and try to change my opinion turned fact,,, because give him the time,, and the view of you spreading your legs for him with the most atrevida look on your face and he’s already on his knees in front of you,, with his hands holding your legs even more open for him, dragging your body down to his face so he has better access,,,, his face pushed into your heat as his tongue spreads your folds,, just lapping you up through your soaked lips,, pushing :) his tongue into you, it has his fucking nose bumping your clit everytime he moves,,, im,, :) ugh him never moving his eyes away from your face, his smirk being hidden away from your folds, picking his pace up eveytime you look down at him through half-lidded eyes,, him grunTinG into you when your hands tangle into his hair and pull with fistfulls,,the vibrations from his muffled grunts shaking you through your core,, you cant help but lift your hips up :) to grind against his face him :) moving one of his hands down to spread your folds apart for him :) so he can focus on your clit with his mouth :)) wrapping his arms around your thighs so you cant move your hips so much against him :) just :)sucking your clit into his mouth :) not letting any of your slick go to waste :))) your moans and his name coming off of your lips higher each time it only encourages him to hold you in place for him even more until hes satisfies with how he leaves you :) hnng ,, going down on you would for sure bring him as much pleasure as you would be feeling :)

and ofc he is never one to ever turn down from receiving when it comes to you :)) seeing you on your knees is just a sight for him to enjoy way too much,, seeing your lips that he loves so much :) wrapped around his cock willingly :) ugh bye,,, , your eyes becoming teary as you look up at him,, some tears managing to run down your cheeks but him wiping them away as he grunts out watching you , mesmerized ,,, just you pushing his cock all the way into your mouth as much as you can fit :) until you gag on him :)) one of your hands is prettily resting at the base of his crotch :) and your other braced on his upper thigh :)) his hand is tangled into your hair to control the speed :) im- him throwing his head back slightly when you hollow your cheeks :) and he cant help but thrust his hips gently and gradually to meet the bobs of your mouth against him :) SoRry i just- ok

p-pace (is he slow and sweet? or fast and rough?)

oh my god ,,,, he is the type to give those slow, deep and rough strokes one minute but then absolutely jackhammer into you it has your body bouncing uncontrollably you have to blindly bring your hand down to hold some part of him because he could easily switch in a second to either pace,, so i want to say both,, because for one scenario,, like regular sex ? i feel like he has a buildup going on with him,, like como te digo,,, even on nights when hes fast and rough with you,, in the very beginning, when he first slides into you,, he starts slow and sensual you know? and then he just gradually builds his pace up from there until he starts pounding you into the bed you forget even what day of the week it is, and i feel like this type of sex is happening 95% of time you both take,, because i mean he loves seeing you go cockdumb ok,,, but ofc i can see him being slow and sensual sometimes, usually i can see it for when its a special occasion maybe, and he wants to make it special and vulnerable,, hacerte el amor pues,, so he’ll do slow and deep thrusts but his thrusts would still make you shake every time he bottoms out fully in you,, his hips rubbing against your pubic mound it makes you roll your eyes back wow :),, but hes a mix of both,, just leaning a bit more into rough and fast

q-quickie (is he into quickies?)

while i see him loving to drag any and all time he has for you ,, it doesn’t mean he wont push quickies out of the picture,,, while i feel like he wouldnt rely too much on quickies because he prefers the buildup without the rushing,, sometimes the ganas to have you are too much for him to patiently wait until he gets home to you,, so quickies are something the both of you might do if either 1) the teasing you both do to eachother become too much at some party or something so he takes you to the nearest secluded spot to release some tension,, or 2) it might be something where when the business starts to take off and hes not home all the time as he would like to be with you,, and quickies might bridge those gaps like early morning showers together for example :) or a quick morning sex thing just so youre both content for the time being but other than that, he definitely makes it all up in the end when time is available, he just uses quickies for when either of you break out in public :) or when things get tight

r-risk (does he take risks? experiments?)

would take risks in like the air he breathes ,,yes he’s all for it to be honest,, some of the ways i can see him taking such risks would be like car sex :) or maybe in some coat closet at some boring party,, :))) or up against the wall somewhere secluded enough but still running the risk someone curios enough to round the corner if they hear something could catch the two of you :)) i kind of explained it a bit earlier but i feel like he would definitely like the feeling of the rush/adrenaline that someone could walk around the corner or something and find you both in the middle of it,, going hard,,, because its really something about it (if he began it first) to see you try to hold yourself together as he has you up against the wall of some place, your hands palming and gripping onto his clothed back and shoulders as he thrusts up into you,, the overwhelming sensation of his hips snapping up into you in a rush, his hands grasping your legs and ass under this dress you you would have as he holds you up,, his face buried in between your neck that youre not sure if its to muffle himself from grunting too loudly if its for him to pepper kisses and bite into your skin to try and get some noise out of you just because hes feeling cocky :) and he wants to see you struggle even further than you are right at that moment and wow- but best believe the roles could most definetly switch if youre up for it :) maybe you giving him head :) because he was bored at some party you both would be at :) and what better way for you to help him with his problem by giving him a distraction :) his hand thats grabbing ahold of your hair struggling to not mess your hair up too much,, him struggling to hold his groans in and he just cant help himself but slowly thrust into your mouth when he hears you slightly gag on him :) hnng sorry im just enforcing it upon you guys that yeah hes down for taking risks no matter the place if youre comfortable enough :))

s-stamina (how long can he last?)

i want to say that i imagine he can go pretty far,, :)) he loves the sight of you having aftershocks after sex from both the intensity and time he took with you,, so i just have to say his stamina is definitely up there somewhere enough so he can fullfill that promise and sight for the both of you,, and he’s never one to turn you down whatsoever no matter what, so if you even ask him either verbally or con tus ojitos hes signing his name down to take care of anything for you and your pleasure,, he definitely vows to some secret shit that he wants to make every orgasm he makes you have to be better than the last, so he gets his stamina in check for you

u-unfair (how often does he tease?)

ok so again,, i just know he getss a kick out of it when he hears how desperate you can get for him,,(like the foreplayyyy my guys im telling you all,, because the build-up from him getting you to your breaking point before he even gets to fuck you fully is just my absoulte favorite palete sorry,, but anyways,,, i feel like he has a thing for when hes continuously teasing you,, and then giving into you but backing away all together when he feels youre about to cum,, and just the way your moans and breaths come out quicker,, the way your body might seem more sensitive and reactive to either his hand lightly traveling over your body pleases him to no extent, he loves the whole package of teasing alright ,,

but im sorry to add in that i also love the idea of you teasing him back :) like if you wear clothing thats barely covering you at all and not giving him any attention so much it gets him desperate for you is just ugghhh or when youre encabronada at him for some stupid shit he mightve pulled to get him on your nerves and if he doesnt see any wrong in whatever he did :) you just playing along with him when youre at your point,, indulging him in things like making out with him, wearing lingerie perhaps :)),,, maybe youre on top of him when hes leaned back on your shared bed frame ready to get ready to go to sleep but you have other plans :) like you starting to grind your hips down onto his :) building him up until hes heavily breathing against you,, his grip on your hips rock hard as you lean down to kiss him :) your hand coming in between you both,, under his pants, :))))) beginning to palm his hard on and getting him built up even more as you pump him in your hand,, and just when hes on the verge of coming :) you stopping everything and just getting up :) giving him this fake smile as he looks up at you all drunk but confused on why you stopped until you remind him that youre mad at him :) and youre not giving him the satisfaction of releasing :))) y that you want him sleeping on the couch for the rest of the week as you move to get yourself ready for bed,, acting like he doesnt even exist at the moment lol,, ayy you literally make him get blue balls and i laugh he probably wont ever do any dumb shit after all of this to be honest but i just love the thought of you teasing him back to the full extent as well :)

v-volume (is he loud while doing it?)

his volume,,, i dont see him doing a lot or overboard for that matter,, what i picture coming from him are groans and grunts ? but only for you to hear, so he’s either always grunting into your skin when he’s thrusting into you repeatedly or groaning in your ear when he feels you scratch down his back and shoulders or :) when he feels you tighten around him as he snaps his hips into yours :) or something else that falls under volume is the way he will whisper/lowly speak shit to you or praise you :) ,, just letting it be known to you how good you’re making him feel and all :))) and when it comes to you, ive said it before and i still stand by it he lives and breathes for volume / noises coming from you :) it makes him know he’s doing shit right if he’s coaxing you to make those noises for him :) and it only boosts his encouragement/ego if he hears you go louder :)))

w-wild card (something random)

i am currently screaming because im reading off of my little brainstorming list of ideas i have for him , dont look at me,, and i cant choose,, i want to share them all but ofc this whole work is long enough so let me just focus on one thing here because get this ,, i was originally going to add this into his nsfw headcanon i wrote a while back but i chickened out and scribbled it out in my final draft but it’s always been on the back of my mind and everytime i come to add something down on mayos ideas/left over writing, it’s one of the first fucking things i see which :) is cockwarming , now hold on let me tell you something because you know how i keep saying that i feel like he loves to see you lose your common sense by the seconds if hes teasing you or just building you up ? :) c*ockwarming is one of those traits :) because hes inside of you,, filling you to the brim as he :) perhaps :))) has you on top of him,, while hes slouched back :) youre just fluttering around him, your nails digging into his clothed chest/shoulders ,, him not wanting you to move or grind against him :) he just wants you on top of him with his cock inside of you,, and if you do try to move him :) him stopping you by gripping your hips,, :) quieting your whimpers :) by kissing you :)) whispering soft praises into you hnng im sorry i cant or something else i can picture thats somewhat differently is when he has you in bed,, and it happens during foreplay,, right before hes going to fuck you,, like :))) maybe him pushing your final button by sliding into you,, but stopping once hes all the way in you and staying there,, :) distracting you by kissing your lips :) and when you slightly buck your hips up into his to like signal him youre ready :) him coming to hold your hips down towards the bed in a harsh grip :) so you cant move :),, him leaning his body back so he can see you fully, youre eyes half closed, mouth open with small pants coming out from the pressure of his cock filling you all the way :)))) him just pushing his cocky side of his attitude out that he has by bringing one of his thumbs to massage circles onto your clit :)) wanting to see how he can make you moan this way without pumping into you :) just filled completely by him only and feeling your warmth wrapped around him wow ok

y-yearning (how high is his sex drive?)

probably average to high?? and i say that because i feel like his yearning is definitely always sitting on the back of his mind simply because i can picture him always wanting or needing to touch/hold some part of you when he has you near him and i dont know if it’s because he’s whipped for you so much he just needs to feel you next to him :) or if maybe he likes having that security sense that he has you close to him in case something goes sideways and he can protect you but it might be both,, so i feel like all of that definitely transfers to his yearning/sex drive to say the least since i feel like he’s always down for whatever as long as you give the green light to him,, because for example say his name once in the most neutral or even yet the softest tone ever and he’s internally turning into a puddle because it’s you his favorita mujer/tesoro de sus ojos that’s calling out to him and he’s dropping everything pendiente to see why you need him and :) if it’s you :) needing him :) or showing him a surprise :)))) of you wearing something :) his ass is 100% ready :) just imagine a light switch if you will when it comes to his yearning, he keeps it away when not needed but he’s ready to go once you say so :)

z-zzz (how quickly does he fall asleep afterwards?)

listen he won’t ever admit it,, but he turns into such a sap for you after sex, even if he’s cocky 99% of the time,, i know mi hombre like no other because you both were just being intimate with one another , even if he fucked you into no tomorrow but you both were literally at your most vurnable points he can’t help but literally let all of his walls down (not that he doesn’t already with you around ) but he feels like it’s his “duty” to make sure you’re alright and attended to ? so he definitely waits for you to fall asleep first, and in the meantime :) i can most definitely as i slam my hand down see him filling up the time in between you slowing down your heavy breaths to the time you fall asleep by just holding you against him, your head just on his chest as he wraps his arm around your shoulders,, saying the most random shit it would have you softly giggling against him, ugh him planting soft kisses to the top of your head,, loving the feeling :( of you cuddling against him :( your hand that’s on top of his chest probably drawing random figures but it makes him burst on the inside :( and ughhh him just holding you closer when he sees you starting to fall asleep :(( giving you hardcore h e a r t e y e s :(

taglist: @coaxium-captain-rex @visintaes @sheeshgivemeabreak @artemiseamoon @wtfisgoingonlol @boomclapxox @carlislecullenisadilf @ashlingiswriting @fleurfatale89​ 

let me know if you want to be added! 

#mi hombre de oro te amo #narcos mexico #narcos: mexico #ismael el mayo zambada #el mayo #ismael el mayo zambada x reader #el mayo x reader #narcos mexico imagine #narcos mexico imagines

[twstwonderlandstuff]

HEY CONGRARS ON 500 FOLLOWES MWAMWA /p

can i req yan! azul with a pretty apathetic/uninterested gn! reader ? like whatever he does the reader doesnt really care and turn a blind eye or smth ig SJDKFJK ig if it gets the creative juice runnin you can make the reader a lil mean ?? like

azul : the finest treassures, from the bottom of the ocean, all for you my dear beloved !

reader : L + ratio + no bitches + idc + no one asked + touch sea grass

TOUCH SEA GRASS LMAOOOO

no bitches in the sea nor land lad's down bad with nobody to hold onto

man gets NO bitches, NONE

also, azul is VERY delusional in this piece

trigger warning: delusional love, yandere, toxic thoughts about someone, unhealthy worshipping

it’s funny how something so simple like a fascination can turn morbid, azul thinks as he gazes at your figure far across the classroom, who’s pointedly ignoring him, completely transfixed on grim, who lied on your lap.

he knows you’re ignoring him and while it hurts, it gives him some sort of thrill- a thrill that you at least acknowledged him enough that you’ll actively avoid him, and it’s enough to make azul sigh lovingly. 

“azul.” you call out sharply, belching when you see his attention snap directly at you. it would be cute if he weren’t so horrendously creepy. “stop staring, you pervert.”

he finds himself nodding at the words. He is a creep, but just for you!

“then stop!” you hiss. “I don’t know what I did to you, but STOP IT. you must be pretty pathetic to spend all your time tailing me instead of focusing on your scam business.”

the normal azul would deflect, but not this one. no, he nods again, agreeing with you. you’re talking to him, you’re talking to him! isn’t this the most blessed day-!

“fuck you, touch some sea grass, you freak.” you growl, rushing to get out of the classroom, flipping a finger along the way.

“no, wait, please-!” Azul stands up, hurriedly following you. “I just-”

“Just what, huh? you gross 8-legged weirdo- find some other hobby, stupid.” you stalk off after that, slamming the door shut.

8-legged… you knew? you know about his true form…and you acknowledged it?! azul feels his heart hammer against his chest, completely ignoring the other end of your words. he’s so happy!

azul rushes to where you sat, scrounging through your things and, as if the Great Seven blessed him, found a piece of hair- your hair. even if you claim to hate him, you leave things like this for him to find, huh…? how shy of you.

just you wait, love, he’ll crack that hard shell of yours. 

#twisted wonderland #twst wonderland #twst #azul ashengrotto #yandere azul ashengrotto x reader #yandere azul ashengrotto #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere twst #i hope the reader is as mine as you envisioned #anon! #LOLOL #gn reader #gn! reader #gender neutral reader #cherry picking