#when I was in 10th grade I realized I wanted to be a psychologist | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

livsworld-ndstyle · 2 months

Text

save the date

tomorrow.

2/26/24.

save the date.

at least for me.

i have the meeting which i mentioned a couple of posts back and i’ve been scared for it. AND ITS TOMORROW!?

also why is there a big gap in between save the date and the word tomorrow?-

also i digressed a lot teehee!

second period. 8:32am. i’m so mad that it’s immediately after february / president’s day break, even though my past meeting dates, which i have memorized, have been in a similar timeframe.

this year - 2/26/24

last year - 3/1/23

the year before last - 3/21/22

but anyways i have to miss spanish class for the second year in a row!! my spanish teacher is gonna flip, im in a college level and college credit bearing spanish class and its the second highest. we’re prepping for the national spanish exam, which is a standardized spanish exam that i have taken in years past.

last year i got bronze, the year before last i got an honorable mention. this year i want silver and next year i want gold to show progressive improvement.

some other patterns i’ve noticed with my meetings is the teacher and class they choose that i should miss

10th & 11th: missed spanish, chose my math teacher to be the general education teacher.

8th & 9th: missed social studies/global, chose my english teacher to be the general education teacher.

6th & 7th: missed support class, chose my social studies teacher to be the general education teacher.

so i’m highly convinced there’s a method to the madness.

anyways now i’m going to go into depth of each of the invited teachers.

if you remember this pic:

yes i have this picture somewhere in my favorites album, it’s easier to access that way.

also on the doc it has my real name (cuz liv is derived from olivia) but PLEASE DO NOT CALL ME OLIVIA. ty.

person #1: the chairperson/psychologist

if i get any testing done within the triennial period, like how i did my freshman year, i would get pulled out to take a variety of tests. i remember being so mad when i realized my IQ from grade 4 is the same as it was in grade 9, and i’m in the above average range for VSI.

which is insane. i used to be below average for VSI.

VSI, or Visual Spatial Index, is a subtest in the WISC-V tests for an ability to evaluate visual details and understand visual-spatial relationships to construct geometric designs from a model. (Child Psychologist AU).

the link to that article ->

also i don’t live in AUS, but this is the best definition on it.

2. my math teacher, also my favorite teacher! she recommended me to take two math classes, which is a shock even for me and also i love her so much because it’s fun to see her teach and her teaching style brings so much joy to my life and i can’t wait to see what the rest of the year has in store.

the only part i’m worried about, well, maybe two things.

general ed teachers have to take notes on me leading up to the meeting…and i don’t know what’s contained in these notes she’s written, so yeah that’s one. also, i told her that if she ever sees me distracted., she can redirect me — i guess i have never realized just how much i do get distracted until she tells me to stay on task when we do group work!

pretty much every group i’ve been in with my friends (so like clover, daniela, and meredith) we’ve been told to stop talking about other topics, and the only reason why is because im there.

clover & daniela normally work alone, together, without meredith and i and they’re super productive. they talk AND get work done.

meredith & i are the opposite. we work together any chance we get when she doesn’t pick partners and while meredith and i work we both distract each other.

the only annoying problem is, every time i get redirected from talking to meredith, we are always talking about a math problem.

when i got redirected with clover and daniela, we were distinctly talking about a different topic…!

3. my case manager/special ed teacher:

well i think she has a plethora of things to say about me. but like a plethora of GOOD things. because im a great student. i have a 92 in english and she’s the coteacher so it works out perfectly for me! :)

plus my writing is super strong, i wrote a 507-word response for english when it was supposed to be 5-7, and my other english teacher wrote this lovely comment!

you don’t have to read the whole thing, especially if you haven’t read the great gatsby.

but my english teacher gave 7 perfect scores on this assignment so of course i’m so proud of this.

4. my guidance counselor

even though i just saw her for my junior meeting, i know she also has a plethora of good things to say, so im not worried about her input.

5. my speech teacher

worried- i have not gone to speech in a while, either because my case manager hasn’t sent me my speech schedule and because i use the period i have speech to finish any tests so my teachers don’t hunt me down in the testing room…which HAS happened.

6. also not mentioned, at least on the document, but my other general class teachers get an email the monday of and have to write like 3-6 sentences on my progress in their class.

the other 3 blurred people are my parents and i., but i don’t want information out there on my parents on tumblr.

also i accidentally blurred the location. it’s supposed to be a video conference, but i told the committee to make it in-person and now both my parents are coming so yay!

anyways this is a long post but i hope you enjoyed! i wrote this at my local hairdresser 🤗

im gonna prob post after the meeting, so like period 3 or 5 or even 9 about what went down in a new post.

thanks for reading :)

ps if you’re still there, i’m gonna make a new style where i use the quote text as a header for my posts.

bye now! :)

#neurodivergent #actually autistic #i don’t know what to tag this #actually neurodivergent #school #autism #learning disability #asd #autism masking #low support needs

3 notes · View notes

giftedsupport · 2 years

Note

Hello! Really finding some camaraderie in this community. A recurring theme seems to be having to develop study skills in the beginning of college. How can I start working on this now?

Oo, good question. It's tough to figure out what study skills will work for you until you find yourself in a situation where you really need to study. Here are a couple things that might help:

--google about different kinds of study skills and what works for people so you have some ideas to try when you need to study.

--When you DO find yourself in a situation where you need to study for something, go with the technique that works for YOU, not the technique everybody else says SHOULD work. The first time I really needed to study (basically memorize!) a large amount of information for a test was in 10th grade, when we had to memorize the charges of various elements (that chemistry class was bizarrely intense for 15-year-olds...). The teacher suggested we study with flashcards. I tried that... and got HORRIBLY frustrated, because it just was NOT working for me. Finally, at my wit's end, I went and got a box of crayons and color-coded my notes. I memorized the information through color association. Because that's what worked for me! I'm very visual. Later in high school I extrapolated this and realized that I could also memorize material by putting the information into little drawings and cartoons. That's what worked for me. So if you try a technique and it doesn't work for you, ditch it and try something else!

--try to develop some good study habits now, while things are easier, so that when things are harder, you've already got those habits established. For instance, if you find that you study better in quiet spaces than loud ones, try making it a habit to make time to study in a quiet space regularly, even if you don't need to study very much at a time. That way, when you're in a harder class and you're going to have to study, you'll automatically gravitate toward the good study habit you've established.

--One thing I would suggest practicing in particular is planning ahead. When you're in college, your assignments will all be listed out in each class's syllabus, in the form of a little calendar. Generally, listed under each class date is the homework and readings that will be due that day. Likewise, the major due dates for big projects will be listed. The professors often will NOT remind you of your homework and reading assignments: they expect you to know, because it's in your syllabus! This means that for a lot of students, their planner is their best friend. So try to start the habit of keeping some kind of planner with homework, due dates, projects, etc in it. Some people do better with a paper planner and some people do better with keeping it in their phones. I personally did extra planning ahead, so that if a big project was due on a certain week, I would write in a little reminder two weeks ahead of the due date to start working on the project if I hadn't already. You'll want to find the techniques that work for you. So I would recommend trying to establish some kind of calendar/planner habit now!

I'm not an educational psychologist (and it was MANY years ago now that I took an ed psych class!) but that's my advice, off the top of my head! If any of you have any other suggestions, please do share!

Also, I don't know if my readers know this, but I used to be a college instructor (it was my job while I was in graduate school, studying for my MA and my PhD). I have a pretty good insight into how college classes work, from both the perspective of a student and the perspective of a professor. So if you have any questions about college or grad school, feel free to ask!

#college #study skills #study tips #high school #school

4 notes · View notes

ugh-tsumu · 3 years

Text

New school year is fast approaching and I have never been this scared

#i usually don't believe my gut feeling but #something tells me that I'll fail this school year #which I really shouldn't wish for because I'm a scholar and I'd lose it once I fail twice #but #to fail means freedom #i... really want to change my course #i just don't have the courage to tell my parents #ever since I was a child they always told me that I'd be an accountant #bc my aunts can help me secure a job once I graduate #I didn't really mind when I was younger because I didn't have a dream #when I was in 10th grade I realized I wanted to be a psychologist #yk the psychologist that interrogates children for the court to acquire more data to observe for the case?#yes #I really want something to do with medicine but less bloody like in nursing or whay #*what #but they told me I shouldn't pursue it #man...#growing up #I realize I have a lot if regrets in this lifetime #I wish I can turn back the time #I wish I fought #People often say to go with the flow is the easiest way #But here I am: completely lost #I wish I persisted man #hikbi.shares

5 notes · View notes

scholastc · 5 years

Text

YA GIRL IS FINALLY DONE WITH HIGH SCHOOL!!! I’ll be graduating soon (in literally 2 weeks aaaah), so I decided to reflect on the experience and put this post together. Here are the 4 things I learned in high school (that’s not all about the maths and the sciences)!!

1. Give yourself some credit

After receiving a test paper with a low mark or hearing negative feedback from my research adviser about a thesis paper that I’ve been working so so hard on, I would understandably feel upset with myself, especially if it’s something I put a lot of effort in. Situations like these make me feel extremely distressed and leave my mind clouded with negative thoughts and emotions. In times like these, it is super important to give yourself some credit. Don’t discredit your achievements just because something didn’t go right! Remember your achievements! They don’t have to be big achievements but rather, things you’ve done that made you feel accomplished and fulfilled. Don’t focus on the things your shortcomings. Give yourself credit for your achievements and your abilities!

2. Find ways to love the ‘pain’

High school is hella tedious and routinely and for most of my high school days, I obviously was never excited to go through any of it. This lead to numerous absences and tardiness sanctions that messed with my conduct and overall academic standing. After my first two years of high school, I finally decided to find ways to love the ‘pain’. I decided to get up at 4am every day to cook myself a hearty meal for lunch so I would have something to look forward to during the day. In addition to this, I always took the time to rewrite my notes in the school library after classes because I loved using colorful pens and highlighters to make my notes look visually appealing, even if no one else would see them but myself. It’s things like these that seem small, but actually made the mundane high school routine actually bearable for me.

3. Give yourself a break

I don’t even know how many times I found myself breaking down in my room or in the school library because of assignments, readings, and tests. I also have ended up pulling multiple all-nighters to finish my thesis. One time, I even had to pull out my laptop in the middle of a family trip to do some research for another paper. I’ve spent so much of my time working my ass off to do well in terms of academics. Whenever I would have free time, I would still insist on doing schoolwork and whatnot. In the end, I would just feel overworked and too exhausted to do anything else and that’s the absolute worst thing you can do to yourself.

Be kind to yourself! Go on a milk tea date, put on a face mask, take a nap. Overworking yourself isn’t being productive. In fact, it even damages your productivity, so do yourself a favor and give yourself a break.

4. You don’t have to have everything figured out right now

Damn, this was probably the hardest thing I ever had to come to terms with. It took countless nights of crying and panicking for me to realize that it’s okay not to have everything figured out right at this second. When I was in middle school, I was set on becoming a musician. Then, I wanted to become a seismologist. Then, I found interest in Psychology when I was in 9th and 10th grade. I was so certain I was going to be a Psychologist until 11th grade where we had sudden introduction to Psychology lesson where we learned about the brain. There, I realized it wasn’t for me.

All my friends have been decided on what course they’ll be taking, and I felt immensely panicked and anxious about how undecided I am about my course, what school I’m going to take, what career I’m going to take on after university. At family gatherings, relatives would always ask me what I want to be considering I’m so close to graduating high school. I would always say I’m unsure yet, and that’s where the pressure gets even more intense and the “when I was your age, …” stories begin.

It took such a long while for me to realize that it’s okay to be undecided and uncertain about the future. For most of my senior year, I made the effort to talk to my friends, parents, and our school guidance counselor to ask them for help and advice. I journaled constantly. Through this experience, I learned more about myself and my personality and figured that maybe I would do well in the field of Communications. As for now, that’s really all I know and that’s okay. You have a whole life ahead of you, you have tons of time to figure things out :)

#emmastudies #studylustre #studyquill #intellectys #adelinestudiess #tbhstudying #eintsein #heypat #heyaestudier #renae talks #mine #high school #studyblr #serendistudy #lawyerd #heypooh #akydemics #obsidianstudy

760 notes · View notes

epilepticcunt · 3 years

Text

Making an appointment with Dr. Bowers, the psychological and behavioral psychologist I used to see from the beginning of 7th grade to the end of 10th grade. She diagnosed me with BPD in front of my dad and Gwyn. Within the continuum of Ryan and I’s relationship I got kicked out of my mom and Mike’s house due to my loyalty and unwillingness to break up with him for them. I was sixteen at the time. I am now twenty four. My ex told me in a fit of anger how much of a cunt I was for perpetuating a BPD relationship cycle. Maybe he’s right. The least I can do is clean my side of the street for my future self.

Still doesn’t change the fact that he stole a shit load of my clothes, my butt plug he bought me for Christmas 2 years ago (like four times, we only used it together once when he first gave it to me but every time we broke up he would jack it from me...) My first bottle of lube we got as a couple is gone, lingerie missing, makeup missing, he got caught on Tinder 3 times, he ruined a friendship I have had for over a decade. I caught him with a girl a few years back a prior time that we had dated and he chose her over me -- and he went to talk shit to her when we broke up. He didn’t get a job in three years but watched me have mental breakdowns over worrying about not being able to pay the bills, not having sex with me for literally 3 months at a time, telling me he was a-sexual to get out of fucking me, pretending to not hear me cry myself to sleep because he didn’t want me for such a prolonged period of time, promising to communicate but ghosting me for a week, shattering my Nintendo Switch, refusing to touch my pussy unless I complained enough for him to finger me for five mins or less. I have literally dated this person for 13 years on and off and I can still count on one hand how many times he has eaten me out. He would make stupid promises to go to bed at the same time as me, or wake up the same time as I do. They would mean a lot to me in the beginning. I soon realized he was full of shit. Just like when he said he would meet me at my house on my lunch breaks from work. He would always fall through and flake out. I was pushed to my breaking point. YES I loved him, but at what cost? I was depressed as fuck, exhausted trying to explain he needed to grow up and get a fucking job and help me with the bills so I could chill for a second when I get off work. Instead, I would leave for work with him sleeping instead of being awake like he promised. get home from work to him sleeping on my lunch most days. If he wasn’t sleeping he was un-showered and playing video games. I’d leave to go back to work, come back home at five PM and he would be sleeping. Two of my grandparents have gone into Hospice and passed away in the last two years. He knew they were going downhill and knew they weren’t all too present in my life, so it did mean a lot to me. I wanted to be there for them and be there for anything I missed out on before. I visited my grandpa Dick and my grandma Phyllis frequently leading up to their deaths. HE MISSED BOTH OF THEM BECAUSE HE WAS PLAYING OVERWATCH. IGNORED MY MESSAGES FOR FIVE HOURS while I bagged my own grandma with the funeral home. I hate to rate my grandparents like this, but my grandpa really meant a lot to me due to the fact that he was not there a lot of my life. He would show up and give me $50 and feel like that made up for it. It didn’t, I just wanted to spend time with him. I finally got to spend that time with him at the end of his life. and he died. and Ryan fucking missed his death. of course. Because I don’t mean shit and I never meant shit. I specifically remember Valentine’s day 2019 I woke up and he refused to get up with me. Had to go to work so I got ready, left, came and home for lunch. He was sleeping so I said fuck it and didn’t wake him up. I cried on my lunch while he slept on the couch. Came home after work and he was still sleeping on the couch. I tried to wake him up a couple times. He slept all night. I cried.

So I was very angry for the majority of the relationship. I said a lot of things I regret saying. I felt as though he didn’t care either way. He wasn’t giving me any attention at all and even if I freaked out he still didn’t provide any attention after a while. Moral of the story - don’t point out anyone’s personality disorders if you are the one perpetuating them. OF COURSE I have abandonment issues that stem from my father. YOU KNEW THAT - you shouldn’t throw that shit in someone’s face if you were privileged enough to have your father present during your childhood. Fuck you for throwing that in my face. OF COURSE I have problems from that. My own mother told me he chose drugs over my sister and I. I thought my dad was Ken while I was growing up, not James because HE WAS NEVER FUCKING THERE! But you fed into my fear of abandonment anyway just to see what would happen. This. This is what would happen. Are you happy now? My mind can’t stop racing about every misdeed I’ve made in the last 24 years.

I know you think I am the worst person ever Ryan, but you ripped me into pieces. I don’t wish you any ill will either. I just hope you find someone “who can put up with your shit.”

I’m going to get help for my problem. What about you?

0 notes

joeys-pp · 4 years

Photo

This was my first real attempt at a poem, although I didn’t know what it would become at the time. The story behind this one and how I got into poems in the first place is kind of a funny one. I originally wrote this after being frustrated with a school project. The date that my google doc says I wrote this project is January 10th, 2019 which would place me in my junior year in high school. As the message in the poem suggests, I remember being frustrated with the strict guidelines set in place for a project and in my frustration I cranked this poem out in a couple of minutes. In high school, I remember having several options to complete projects whether it be through a power point or a video presentation, or an essay but the one that always appealed to me most was the poem. I feel like if you are ever given the opportunity to write a poem for a project and you want to minimize the amount of time spent on a project just go with the poem. To be able to write four stanzas on a topic in under 15 minutes and to just call it ‘free verse’ was very appealing to me. I remember for this specific project I was very frustrated with the strict guidelines it had for what I could and could not do. I wasn’t familiar with the sentiment but I guess deep inside of me I wanted to be able to complete the project my way- in a better way than the parameters allowed me to do, but since I didn’t want to sacrifice my grade I had to churn out another soulless poem. I guess I was sick of the soulless and pointless written that had followed me throughout my school experience and I wanted to write something with complete freedom that really reflected how I felt. I never wanted to write poems due to the societal portrayal of the edgy high school poet who wasn’t very good at it but still did it just to feel special or come off as deep or whatever. In the moment I wrote this my mind wasn’t really set on the idea of poetry itself it was more conveying my feelings in a new way. The idea of adding rules to writing doesn’t mean that it has to take away from the message that you are trying to express, sometimes it strengthens your message by getting straight to the point. So much of human communication is unspoken or unheard and the thoughts and connotations that are expressed in between the lines and stanzas are just as apparent as the ones that come straight off of the page. The saying little goes a long way is definitely appropriate for poetry and that is what really appealed to me about this peace because in my mind at least it definitely captured the emotions I had towards this subject perfectly and i think that is what drove me to try writing just for fun again and again and again.

Let’s get on to the analysis or explanation of the poem itself. The title; ‘Instruction, instruction!’ is meant to paint the picture of a teacher who is fed up with her class trying to call the class into order but inevitably losing their youthful minds in the process. The way I worded the title is meant to echo the common phrase that teachers use to try and call their class to order; “Class, class!” Something that I have noticed about the school system is that they believe the teaching and retention of a student is the end rather than the means towards their introduction of how this world works. Teachers make the crucial mistake of holding the proper completion of lessons as gospel instead of the progress of the individual student. I think the idea of forcing a kid to learn pointless lessons that are so insignificant in their academic journey is so detrimental to their growth as little humans and this evil in the growth of the student is only amplified when they are put on prescription meth because they have more energy than their already soulless peers. I am not going to get into the argument of letting boys be boys but at the very least don’t pump them full of artificial hormones when they are in the third grade. I don’t think the adults that handle a child’s education or even development (Teachers, Administrative staff, Developmental Psychologists) are competent because I remember as a kid feeling like I had better answers to the problems that my colleagues faced. to sum up this little rabbit trail I think the idiom “ Those who can, do; those who can't, teach.” is pretty appropriate. The first stanza is meant to echo a young me, a student who is confused as to why there is so much structure in the academic system when he wants to explore all of these ideas that are in his mind. He really needs help to explore the relevant topics that are in his mind because he is unsure how to navigate it all or even where to start. Instead of the teacher helping a student in the dark he instead feels that he is propelled deeper into the unknown slowly losing his interest in pursuing anything academic and losing his motivation to even go to school. The next stanza talks about how the approach that the school system takes is a type of ‘One size fits all” system. Instead, the “Path of many options” I feel is a learning system that is much more adapted to the many different types of ways children learn and places an emphasis on personal growth rather than high marks among arbitrary and inconsistent grading criteria. So the second stanza leads directly into the third stanza the second stanza declares something (we don’t know what) and the third stanza sort of clarifies what the second stance was hinting at. What was the second stanza hinting at? Well, “the very soul of essence be.” What is the soul of essence? I guess that is a child's curiosity or the spirit of wanting to learn more about the nature of the things around us- wanting to make it work and finding our place into the society we are thrust in. This is a terrifying concept that we are thrust into this great unknown it strikes every human being straight to their heart of hearts or core whether they realize it or not. The narrator suggests that the best way to go about unlocking the secrets of the universe is to maintain intellectual honesty. So, much of schooling is propaganda, much of it is run on the agenda of the state in order to make perfectly complacent sheep that aren’t capable of fighting the system or the status quo. Why would the system that maintains that status quo give you the tools needed to overthrow it? I think this is why some of the most vacuous or shallow people you could meet have some of the highest gpa’s you’ve seen. In the fourth stanza I show how I wish to be scrutinized by good teachers and in that scrutiny I would actually able to achieve a better understanding of the world around me even though it would take a lot out of me. The fifth stanza is a callback to reality snapping out of the daydream during a teachers lecture if you will, to all the same drivel of a lot of pointless instruction from an inherently corrupted system.

#prose #poetry #school #corruption #school system

0 notes

vashwoodtears · 7 years

Text

My Struggles with Depression

Ever since 8th grade, I’ve been struggling with depression.

I’m a graduating senior in high school right now, so that means I’ve dealt with this for 5 years. I’ve never even talked to a counselor or psychologist about this. I’ve always been too scared. However, I did try to bring it up to one of my friends when I first started feeling that way in 8th grade.

She completely ignored it, which wasn’t good for my mental health whatsoever. I’d tell her that a song has a really deep meaning that I could relate to and would quote specific lyrics, and she’d be like, “oh, cool. This is the song I’m really into right now,” pretending to not have noticed the depressing lyrics (or, I’m sure she did, she just … kinda sucked, and still does, regarding mental illnesses).

Anyway, after that, my depression got worse.

9th grade came, and I met my best friend. Yeah, my depression got bad, but at least I made an awesome friend! I’m sure that if I hadn’t met her, I’d probably be much worse.

But yeah, 9th grade, my depression got bad. I started self-harming. Which, I knew wasn’t good. But I felt like I deserved it, and I liked the temporary physical pain as opposed to the permanent emotional pain. I cut on my left breast, above my heart. I didn’t know why at the time, other than the fact that it was easiest to hide. Now, though, looking back, I think it might have also been because I felt too much, I cared too much. I loved too much. Luckily, I didn’t take a step away from feeling. If I had, I’d probably be off much worse.

But my best friend found out, and always checked to make sure I hadn’t done it again. She’s the frickin best tbh.

10th grade came around, I was still cutting, I was still pretty badly depressed, but I had a better handle on everything, compared to 8th and 9th grade.

11th grade, I grew out of my shell a little bit. I made more friends and actually talked to people. I mean, not many, just a couple people sprinkled throughout my classes. I was still self harming, though. But my best friend was most definitely still my closest friend—duh. No one can replace her. Anyway, my depression was starting to get more manageable, but I was cutting more than ever.

I realized the relationship I was in wasnt a very good one. I told him about my depression once or twice, and he had a slightly more tentative response than my friend from 8th grade. He still never brought it up again, never really checked how I was doing. Not only that, but we couldn’t talk about anything serious. Ever. And being me, I need serious talk at least 40-70% of the time, depending on the day. So, I broke up with him about 2 weeks after prom, a whole month and a half after I had been wanting to originally.

After that, I started to get better. I no longer had a boyfriend a year older than me that acted 5 years younger than me. I took about 6 months to be single, the longest time I’ve ever been single since middle school (I dated a guy for a total of 3 years (broken up into 2 segments), another guy for a month, and another guy for a year and a half). During those 6 months, I worked on self-recovery, and hey! It worked!

But only kind of. I was still self harming, I was still depressed. I still am.

Anyway, 12th grade, I cut once or twice in August, at the beginning of the school year. You could tell that was an improvement for. The almost every day thing I had going on in my junior year. I still have no clue how I consider that year to not be as depressing as my first two. Anyway, I haven’t cut since! That means 9 months clean, as of last week.

But that still doesnt mean I’m better. I still find myself holding the blade between my fingers, an inch away from my left breast. I still catch myself having suicidal thoughts. I still find myself wishing I was prettier, that I could look like that girl. I still hear myself sobbing quietly some nights. I still find myself having unironic existential crises. I still can’t imagine a future for myself, not even for the next year. I’m still not 100% better. Who knows if I’ll ever be?

But that’s okay. It’s okay if I never end up completely better, completely depression-free. It’s okay, because I know I’m trying. I’m trying so, so hard to get better. I’m in a better relationship now. And despite my best friend now living hundreds of miles away from me, I know she’s still here for me, even if I kind of suck at replying to her texts. I know I only have to deal with battling myself, that I am the only person I have ever been fighting.

I know I am getting better, and that I want to help others get better. So please, feel free to come and talk to me about anything. Whether it be your family and how terrible they’re being, or how amazing they’re being. About friend drama, about a stressful situation, your cute new pet, anything. If it’ll make you feel better, please, talk to me. Or even anyone else, if you don’t feel like ranting to a stranger.

I love you all, and am working on loving myself. -Candice

#postitforward #my struggle #self harm #my experience with depression #depression #suicide mention #candi talks

5 notes · View notes

prettylittleliarsxxxx · 7 years

Note

Could you answer like all the questions you posted? (If you feel comfortable) I was literally going down the list and thinking of asking you every single one! Haha

alksghldgh sure! I love doing these!

1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged? Nope, last person I texted was my brother so. Nope nope nope.2. You talked to an ex today, correct? I would rather jump out of a plane without a parachute.3. Have you taken someone's virginity? I guess? Does it count if he ‘took’ mine too? lol4. Is trust a big issue for you? Sometimes. I tend to trust other people more than I trust myself, which is a problem.5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently? Naw. I don’t really like anyone hehe. I’ve had crushes over the years but they’ve mostly been on online people!

the rest is under the cut!

6. What are you excited for? I go to the UK in like…3 weeks or something! I get to see my best friend!!!7. What happened tonight? It’s 7am. I can tell you there’ll be hockey tonight but Idk if my team is gonna win or lose...8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted? No. You do you, honey. Unless you have a drinking problem, then maybe it’s not the best idea9. Is confidence cute? Confidence is great10. What is the last beverage you had? Water or diet coke11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? Uhhhh two, I suppose. My brothers lol12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans? Ya Old Navy surprisingly has super comfy plus size skinny jeans and I love them13. What are you gonna do Saturday night? I have absolutely nothing planned :D14. What are you going to spend money on next? The bus15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed? God no16. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months? I hope so17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything? Really anyone I’d consider a friend. But Ellie & Joy for sure, I don’t know what I’d do without them18. The last time you felt broken? Every day of my life for 15 years19. Have you had sex today? No20. Are you starting to realize anything? I realize stuff every day lol. It’s normally about my depression. Lately I’ve come to realize that I try to make myself available 24/7 for people. I stay near my phone or computer in case anybody is in a crisis and needs to talk because I feel bad if I’m not there for people. I need to work on that.21. Are you in a good mood? Meh, decent enough22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks? BINCH I ALREADY DID23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s? Errrr maybe. I don’t remember what colour his eyes are24. What do you want right this second? Take a nap25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy? If we weren’t dating, I’d say go for it. If we were dating, we’d obviously have to talk about some things.26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color? No. I dyed my hair 7 fucking months ago and IT’S STILL RED!!!!!! It’s faded decently but it’s still red!!! I’m tired of red! I gotta get my hair dyed again lol27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh? No.28. What was the last thing that made you laugh? I dunno, probably something I said to my mom last night29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now? Ya30. Does everyone deserve a second chance? I used to think yes but now, I’m not sure. I think it depends what you did. If you’re a ped*phile? No, no you don’t. If you break someone’s trust or something, yeah, I think people deserve a second chance.31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to? Literally the only boys I talk to are my cousin and my brothers, so no.32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do? WHY ARE YOU SO INTERESTED IN MY LOVE LIFE!! Not everyone is into that, Brenda!!!33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda? No. I literally always have a diet coke with me.34. Listening to? Nothing right now35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore? Sometimes but not usually.36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is? No, it’s been like 2 years37. Do you believe in love at first sight? Eh. Sort of. I think people have connections at first sight, I think people can know if there’s a capacity to love someone at first sight. But I don’t know if I think love at first sight exists.38. Who did you last call? My brother39. Who was the last person you danced with? My ex boyfriend when we were in 9th grade.40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? Because he wouldn’t leave me alone so I caved.41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake? No idea tbh42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today? No. We’re not the hugging type43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush? Of course. I embarrass myself in front of everyone lol44. Do you tan in the nude? No45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss? Yeah I’d take back that whole like 1 week relationship tbh46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night? Naw47. Who was the last person to call you? A telemarketer48. Do you sing in the shower? Boy do I!!!! I put on like a full fucking concert in the shower49. Do you dance in the car? Ya! Only if I’m with my friend though. Our playlist is basically a bunch of songs we listened to in high school.50. Ever used a bow and arrow? Yes51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? My brothers wedding, so I think 201352. Do you think musicals are cheesy? Some can be but I like them anyway53. Is Christmas stressful? Oh my god yes. Mostly just the big dinner part but once the excess people leave and it’s just me, my mom, my brothers & their other halves, and my cousin, it’s great!54. Ever eat a pierogi? Yeah55. Favorite type of fruit pie? Cherry56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? Meteorologist, marine biologist, psychologist, social worker, interior designer57. Do you believe in ghosts? Yes58. Ever have a deja-vu feeling? YES. I get that all the time, I hate it59. Take a vitamin daily? No, just my anti depressants lol60. Wear slippers? Only in the winter if I’m really cold61. Wear a bath robe? No, never62. What do you wear to bed? Tank top and sweatpants63. First concert? Simple Plan, 10th Grade.64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart? Walmart because I’m Canadian and we ain’t got Target or K-mart anymore65. Nike or Adidas? Neither66. Cheetos Or Fritos? Cheetos67. Peanuts or sunflower seeds? I love both68. Favorite Taylor Swift song? Long Live69. Ever take dance lessons? I took ballet for a hot second when I was like 3 or 4. It didn’t last long lol70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? I don’t intend on having a future spouse, but if I do settle down with anyone (and I don’t think it’s likely), they’d have to be a creative type71. Can you curl your tongue? No but I can roll it72. Ever won a spelling bee? No because I never entered one lol73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy? Probably74. What is your favorite book? Aristotle and Dante Discover The Secrets of The Universe75. Do you study better with or without music? With76. Regularly burn incense? No77. Ever been in love? Yeah78. Who would you like to see in concert? I’ve seen most of my faves in concert but the one group that alludes me because they never come here is The Script.79. What was the last concert you saw? Simple Plan, July 201680. Hot tea or cold tea? Either81. Tea or coffee? BOTH82. Favorite type of cookie? Oatmeal raisin or peanut butter83. Can you swim well? Extremely well.84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose? Like in regards to swimming?? If so, then nope.85. Are you patient? Sometimes overly so.86. DJ or band at a wedding? DJ87. Ever won a contest? No88. Ever have plastic surgery? No but I’m hoping to get a breast reduction within the next few years.89. Which are better, black or green olives? Black olives but basically only on pizza or in salad.90. Opinions on sex before marriage? Whatever floats your boat91. Best room for a fireplace? Living room92. Do you want to get married? No

#not pll #ask meme #long post #get to know yer admin!!#anon #ask #answered #chatting with sara

4 notes · View notes

mcjoelcain · 6 years

Text

Ikigai Is Why You Shouldn’t Be Afraid Of Retirement

生き甲斐, pronounced ikigai, is a Japanese concept that means “reason for being.” What makes you get up in the morning without an alarm clock because you’re just so damn excited?

From 1999 – 2001, I had to get to the office by 5:30am because I was a lowly grunt in the investment banking world. Making photocopies of last night’s research, getting coffee for the traders, and making presentations was all part of the morning equities routine. But I was excited because I had a fast-paced job right out of college in NYC.

From 2001 – 2007, despite having to continue getting to work at a goodness forsaken hour, I was still excited because I got a new job in San Francisco with the opportunity to build my own little business out west. Working in a satellite office gave me my first glimpse of what entrepreneurship could be like.

But when the financial crisis hit in 2008, my excitement turned into fear. I no longer went to the office because I loved all that went on in the stock markets. I started setting multiple alarm clocks to ensure I got in on time because I didn’t want to give management a reason for firing me. It was depressing to come in and see everything crumbling so quickly.

Despite a recovery by 2012, my excitement for work no longer existed. Work had become a bureaucratic nightmare, so I figured a way out. In retrospect, what I thought was my ikigai for 13 years was simply a job where I traded time for money. Helping institutions make more money felt shallow, even if some of the institutions were responsible for a teacher’s pension.

But through work, I learned how to be a better communicator. Through the practice of writing daily newsletters about what went on in Asia while we slept, I slowly found my ikigai through storytelling. Clients and colleagues alike would regularly reach out to say how much they enjoyed the newsletter.

Now that I don’t have a compliance department breathing down my neck with Financial Samurai, it’s a joy to help make people believe a little more in themselves by showing what’s possible.

A Closer Look At Ikigai

According to Akihiro Hasegawa, a clinical psychologist and associate professor at Toyo Eiwa University, the origin of the word ikigai goes back to the Heian period (794 to 1185). “Gai comes from the word kai (“shell” in Japanese) which were deemed highly valuable, and from there ikigai derived as a word that means value in living.”

“Japanese people believe that the sum of small joys in everyday life results in a more fulfilling life as a whole,” writes Hasegawa. I believe it. Small things for me like winning a high school conference tennis title and watching my boy take his first steps collectively bring an immense amount of joy.

Mieko Kamiya, author of the book, Ikigai-nitsuite, explains that as a word, ikigai is similar to “happiness” but with some subtle differences. He writes, “Ikigai is what allows you to look forward to the future even if you’re miserable right now.”

One sunny October day in 2011, I found hope that there could be life after finance. For a couple years prior, I was in a funk, no longer enjoying the day-to-day of the business.

After three hours of hiking up and around Santorini, Greece, I stopped to rest at an open bar overlooking the crater. I had my iPhone and the bar had WiFi. Perfect!

My moment of hope: October 2011, Santorini, Greece

I ordered an overpriced $10 Mythos beer and began to check my messages. In my inbox was an advertising client based in London whom I had worked with before. He said he’d pay me $1,100 if I’d put a link on the homepage of this site.

I told him sure! So he sent me the code, I managed to copy and paste the code onto my homepage with my iPhone, and he Paypaled me the $1,100 within 10 minutes after I was done. The whole process took 30 minutes.

That was the moment when I finally realized I could finally escape my job. I immediately ordered another overpriced $10 Mythos beer and devised my layoff plans.

Ikigai Is Why You’ll Be Fine After Retiring

Despite having enough money to survive, after you retire you’ll always be worried for an unknown period of time. My worry lasted for about two years before I could confidently say that I 100% no longer feared running out of money or had made the wrong decision.

After you retire from a conventional job, you’re not going to just sit on your hands and do nothing. You will naturally start doing what provides you the most amount of purpose. And because you will be so focused on making sure retiring when you did was the right choice, you will inevitably find your ikigai!

Please take a look at this graphic explaining ikigai. It might look like a lot of New Age mumbo jumbo, but ikigai has been around for centuries.

Now it’s time to list all the things that will help you find your ikigai. Here’s my list.

What I Love:

Connecting with people

Learning different perspectives

Traveling abroad

Creating something from nothing

Getting recognized for my efforts

Reading great stories

Taking care of my family

Writing

What I’m Good At:

Telling stories

Doing what I say

Not giving up

Building partnerships

Simplifying the complex

Getting the most out of my body and mind

Writing

What The World Needs:

Access to free financial education

More interesting stories

Geographic, racial, and socioeconomic diversity in personal finance

As many different perspectives as possible

A stronger support network for those most in need

What I Can Be Paid For:

My writing

My speaking

The Financial Samurai brand

Always Find Your Ikigai

Having something to live for truly matters.

The Fear Of Running Out Of Money In Retirement Is Overblown

Overcoming The One More Year Syndrome To Do Something New

How To Retire Early And Never Have To Work Again

Readers, please share with me your reason for being! Have you found your ikigai? Or are you still on the search? Why do we settle, when there is so much opportunity?

https://www.financialsamurai.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/09/Ikigai-Is-why-you-shouldnt-fear-retirement.m4a

The post Ikigai Is Why You Shouldn’t Be Afraid Of Retirement appeared first on Financial Samurai.

from https://www.financialsamurai.com/ikigai-is-why-you-shouldnt-be-afraid-of-retirement/

#Financial Samurai

0 notes

unofficially-closeted-blog · 6 years

Text

The Story and The Plan

It's 1 o'clock AM and here I am:

THE STORY :

I've always been the one to be extremely in denial about anything that seemed weird or off. So with that in mind let's begin.

It all started in 6th grade, the peak of hormones and self awareness. Everything mattered, appearance, intelligence, friends, and so one and so forth. But most importantly, the one thing that started to become to some degree serious was relationships.

I admit, I have had my fair share of relationships in middle school, godawful ones, but they were real. I asked the question and everything . Up until 7th grade, I thought I was straight, but then I started to question it. As a matter of fact, I started questioning everything. This is what I believe to be my coming of age. I realized I wasn't comfortable within my own skin and had an attraction for guys, but being me, I ignored it. Completely. Dropped it and pushed it away, denied the existence of this mind set.

I've been doing it for 4 to 5 years.

I know to some, this number it's nothing compared, but it was hell for me. It wasn't up until 8th/9th grade that I came out as bisexual, still sexually confused and lost. It wasn't until this year that I realized I don't have an attraction romantically towards women. It reached a point where I stopped looking at women in a way of wanting to have them to wanting to be like them. I sexual need for women was no longer strong and dominant, instead my want to look like one was strong. But I pushed it away.

I saw the things they'd say on the internet, I saw the things they'd say on the news. Some friends I used to have would say things. I was depressed. Ultimately unhappy.

Moving onto 8th grade. I got into a almost 2 year relationship with a girl I swore I loved, but one thing I never told anyone was that at times I didn't feel like I loved her. When things would go bad, I wouldn't cry or get butthurt about it. The only times I'd actually be effected by it was when threats would be played in order to get a leverage on me. Other than that, it simply mattered less to me. And it wasn't because I didn't care or know the fundamentals of a relationship, it was because I had minimal interest in her as a girl.

That took up to like 9th grade, here comes 10th.

This was a crazy year, I dropped my 8th grade girlfriend due to differences (she was a partier, I was not, it didn't mix), I got involved in another relationship with a girl (still trying to figure it my sexuality), and I was becoming more depressed. I was still very denial about my feelings and thoughts, and I was still acting this part that has now become habitual.

Off topic (but like kind of on topic): You know how some times you are so used to doing something that it becomes habitual? Alright, now do you know how some times you do it in public, but realize it probably isn't wise, so you stop yourself? Do you also know the feeling of that habit ending and now that new habit forming? That kicks in here.

My natural self is very much feminine and attracted to certain things that society would label "Feminine", but I had to put on this masculine mask because that is who I believed myself to be. I refused to accept myself for who I was in fear of not being accepted by my peers or my family. So I got myself into a relationship that lasted 4 months at first. I ended it because I want attracted to her.

I came out as gay to my family a month afterwards. They accepted it, they told me they loved me either way, I was relieved. My sister already had a hunch, and my mom and dad just kind of said they didn't care who I was, but I was their son and they loved me either way.

A couple months later, my denial kicks back into full throttle. I start fighting the feeling of being a homosexual and put myself into a relationship with a girl that I had clearly no attraction to. It sucked. I ended it like a week or 2 in.

Comes 11th grade, I finally tell my parents how I feel during summer break, how in depressed and I feel alone. That's when I started therapy, a moment of self discovery starts. This is no mere moment, this is like months.

I'm still in denial about being a homosexual, so I go back out with the first ex from 10th grade. This only last a month though because after months (already a couple of months into the school year) of going through therapy and searching myself, I came to the agreement with myself that I am a homosexual.

I realized why I was never comfortable within my own skin. What I didn't include in this story was that meanwhile I wasn't attracted to women, I wanted to be a women (oh wait I did include it), it wasn't until a few months back that I realized I have Gender Dysphoria.

I told my parents, I told my doctor. They were both happy for me. There weren't any problems, my mom and dad are completely with me on it and supportive of me becoming who I want to be as are my doctors. But damn is it expensive.

The Plan:

So this is what I plan to do, I'll list the steps. I am not going through treatment or seeing a special psychologist yet because of the cost, so here the plan I have:

Continue my education and pursue college in psychology.

Get a job, a real one. Save up this money and put it into a bank account that's some purpose is for the transition.

Graduate from high school and go to college where it is want to go.

Continue with whatever job I have to get a new job to wherever it is I'm going.

Keep saving up money!

Graduate college

Get a good job as a psychiatrist

Start going through the steps for transition.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anyways, thanks for reading and sticking around. Sorry for the horrible grammar and story telling, it is now 2 in the morning and I'm tired and my head doesn't want to think too hard so yeah. Goodnight!

#transgender #trans #homosexual #gay #pride #family #confession #late night #transition #female #feminine #cute #I tried #I swear #story #storytime #therapy #future #plans

0 notes

newstfionline · 7 years

Text

Prozac Nation Is Now the United States of Xanax

By Alex Williams, NY Times, June 10, 2017

This past winter, Sarah Fader, a 37-year-old social media consultant in Brooklyn who has generalized anxiety disorder, texted a friend in Oregon about an impending visit, and when a quick response failed to materialize, she posted on Twitter to her 16,000-plus followers. “I don’t hear from my friend for a day--my thought, they don’t want to be my friend anymore,” she wrote, appending the hashtag #ThisIsWhatAnxietyFeelsLike.

Thousands of people were soon offering up their own examples under the hashtag; some were retweeted more than 1,000 times. You might say Ms. Fader struck a nerve. “If you’re a human being living in 2017 and you’re not anxious,” she said on the telephone, “there’s something wrong with you.”

It was 70 years ago that the poet W.H. Auden published “The Age of Anxiety,” a six-part verse framing modern humankind’s condition over the course of more than 100 pages, and now it seems we are too rattled to even sit down and read something that long.

Anxiety has become our everyday argot, our thrumming lifeblood: not just on Twitter (the ur-anxious medium, with its constant updates), but also in blogger diaries, celebrity confessionals, a hit Broadway show (“Dear Evan Hansen”), a magazine start-up (Anxy, a mental-health publication based in Berkeley, Calif.), buzzed-about television series (like “Maniac,” a coming Netflix series by Cary Fukunaga, the lauded “True Detective” director) and, defying our abbreviated attention spans, on bookshelves.

While to epidemiologists both disorders are medical conditions, anxiety is starting to seem like a sociological condition, too: a shared cultural experience that feeds on alarmist CNN graphics and metastasizes through social media. As depression was to the 1990s--summoned forth by Kurt Cobain, “Listening to Prozac,” Seattle fog and Temple of the Dog dirges on MTV, viewed from under a flannel blanket--so it seems we have entered a new Age of Anxiety. Monitoring our heart rates. Swiping ceaselessly at our iPhones. Filling meditation studios in an effort to calm our racing thoughts.

Consider the fidget spinner: endlessly whirring between the fingertips of “Generation Alpha,” annoying teachers, baffling parents. Originally marketed as a therapeutic device to chill out children with anxiety, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder or autism, these colorful daisy-shaped gizmos have suddenly found an unlikely off-label use as perhaps the an explosively popular toy, this generation’s Rubik’s Cube.

But the Cube was fundamentally a cerebral, calm pursuit, perfect for the latchkey children of the 1980s to while away their lonely, Xbox-free hours. The fidget spinner is nothing but nervous energy rendered in plastic and steel, a perfect metaphor for the overscheduled, overstimulated children of today as they search for a way to unplug between jujitsu lessons, clarinet practice and Advanced Placement tutoring.

According to data from the National Institute of Mental Health, some 38 percent of girls ages 13 through 17, and 26 percent of boys, have an anxiety disorder. On college campuses, anxiety is running well ahead of depression as the most common mental health concern, according to a 2016 national study of more than 150,000 students by the Center for Collegiate Mental Health at Pennsylvania State University. Meanwhile, the number of web searches involving the term has nearly doubled over the last five years, according to Google Trends. (The trendline for “depression” was relatively flat.)

To Kai Wright, the host of the politically themed podcast “The United States of Anxiety” from WNYC, which debuted this past fall, such numbers are all too explicable. “We’ve been at war since 2003, we’ve seen two recessions,” Mr. Wright said. “Just digital life alone has been a massive change. Work life has changed. Everything we consider to be normal has changed. And nobody seems to trust the people in charge to tell them where they fit into the future.”

For “On Edge,” Ms. Petersen, a longtime reporter for The Wall Street Journal, traveled back to her alma mater, the University of Michigan, to talk to students about stress. One student, who has A.D.H.D., anxiety and depression, said the pressure began building in middle school when she realized she had to be at the top of her class to get into high school honors classes, which she needed to get into Advanced Placement classes, which she needed to get into college.

“In sixth grade,” she said, “kids were freaking out.”

This was not the stereotypical experience of Generation X.

Urban Dictionary defines a slacker as “someone who while being intelligent, doesn’t really feel like doing anything,” and that certainly captures the ripped-jean torpor of 1990s Xers.

For these youths of the 1990s, Nirvana’s “Lithium” was an anthem; coffee was a constant and Ms. Wurtzel’s “Prozac Nation: Young and Depressed in America,” about an anhedonic Harvard graduate from a broken home, dressed as if she could have played bass in Hole, was a bible.

The millennial equivalent of Ms. Wurtzel is, of course, Lena Dunham, who recently told an audience at the 92nd Street Y in Manhattan, “I don’t remember a time not being anxious.” Having suffered debilitating anxiety since age 4, the creator, writer and star of the anxiety-ridden “Girls” recalled how she “missed 74 days of 10th grade” because she was afraid to leave her house. This was around the time that the largest act of terrorism in United States history unfolded near the TriBeCa loft where she grew up.

But monitored by helicopter parents, showered with participation awards and then smacked with the Great Recession, Generation Y has also suffered from the low-level anxiety that comes from failing to meet expectations. Thus the invention of terms like “quarter-life crisis” and “FOMO” (“fear of missing out,” as it is fueled by social media apps like Instagram). Thus cannabis, the quintessential chill-out drug, is turned into a $6.7 billion industry.

Sexual hedonism no longer offers escape; it’s now filtered through the stress of Tinder. “If someone rejects you, there’s no, ‘Well, maybe there just wasn’t chemistry …,’” Jacob Geers, a 22-year-old in New York who works in digital sales, said. “It’s like you’re afraid that through the app you’ll finally look into the mirror and realize that you’re butt ugly,” he added.

If anxiety is the melody of the moment, President Trump is a fitting maestro. Unlike his predecessor, Barack Obama, a low-key ironist from the mellow shores of Oahu, the incumbent is a fast-talking agitator from New York, a city of 8.5 million people and, seemingly, three million shrinks.

In its more benign form, only a few beats from ambition, anxiety is, in part, what made Mr. Trump as a businessman. In his real estate career, enough was never enough. “Controlled neurosis” is the common characteristic of most “highly successful entrepreneurs,” according to Mr. Trump (or Tony Schwartz, his ghostwriter) in the 1987 book, “The Art of the Deal.” “I don’t say that this trait leads to a happier life, or a better life,” he adds, “but it’s great when it comes to getting what you want.”

Everything had to be bigger, bolder, gold-er. And it made him as a politician, spinning nightmare tales on the stump about an America under siege from Mexican immigrants and Muslim terrorists.

But if Mr. Trump became president because voters were anxious, as a recent Atlantic article would have readers believe, other voters have become more anxious because he became president. Even those not distressed by the content of his messages might find the manner in which they are dispensed jarring.

“In addition to the normal chaos of being a human being, there is what almost feels like weaponized uncertainty thrown at us on a daily basis,” said Kat Kinsman, the “Hi, Anxiety” author. “It’s coming so quickly and messily, some of it straight from the president’s own fingers.”

Indeed, Mr. Trump is the first politician in world history whose preferred mode of communication is the 3 a.m. tweet--evidence of a sleepless body, a restless mind, a worrier.

“We live in a country where we can’t even agree on a basic set of facts,” said Dan Harris, an ABC news correspondent and “Nightline” anchor who found a side career as an anti-anxiety guru with the publication of his 2014 best-seller, “10% Happier.” Mr. Harris now also offers a meditation app, a weekly email newsletter and a podcast that has been downloaded some 3.5 million times in the past year.

The political mess has been “a topic of conversation and a source of anxiety in nearly every clinical case that I have worked with since the presidential election,” said Robert Duff, a psychologist in California. He wrote a 2014 book, “Hardcore Self-Help,” whose subtitle proposes to conquer anxiety in the coarse language that has also defined a generation.

The Cold War, starring China, North Korea and Russia, is back, inspiring headline-induced visions of mushroom clouds not seen in our collective nightmares since that Sunday evening in 1983 when everyone watched “The Day After” on ABC.

And television was, as Marshall McLuhan famously wrote, a cool medium. Our devices are literally hot, warming our laps and our palms.

“In our always-on culture, checking your phone is the last thing you do before you go to sleep, and the first thing you do if you wake up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom,” Mr. Harris said. “Just today, I got an alert on my phone about the collapsing Arctic ice shelf. That’s scary as hell.”

Push notifications. Apocalyptic headlines. Rancorous tweets. Countless studies have found links between online culture and anxiety. But if social media can lead to anxiety, it also might help relieve it.

The “we have no secrets here” ethos of online discourse has helped bring anxiety into the open, and allowed its clinical sufferers to band together in a virtual group-therapy setting. Hence the success of campaigns like #ThisIsWhatAnxietyFeelsLike, which helped turn anxiety--a disorder that afflicts some 40 million American adults--into a kind of rights movement. “People with anxiety were previously labeled dramatic,” said Sarah Fader, the Brooklyn social media consultant who also runs a mental-health advocacy organization called Stigma Fighters. “Now we are seen as human beings with a legitimate mental health challenge.”

And let’s remember that we survived previous heydays of anxiety without a 24-hour digital support system. Weren’t the Woody Allen ‘70s the height of neurosis, with their five-days-a-week analysis sessions and encounter groups? What about the 1950s, with their duck-and-cover songs and backyard bomb shelters?

That era “was the high-water mark of Freudian psychoanalysis, and any symptom or personality trait was attributed to an anxiety neurosis,” said Peter D. Kramer, the Brown University psychiatrist who wrote the landmark 1990s best-seller, “Listening to Prozac.” “And then there were substantial social spurs to anxiety: the World Wars, the atom bomb. If you weren’t anxious, you were scarcely normal.”

Scott Stossel, editor of The Atlantic, whose “My Age of Anxiety” helped kick off the anxiety memoir boom three years ago, urged people to pause, not for deep cleansing breaths, but for historical perspective.

“Every generation, going back to Periclean Greece, to second century Rome, to the Enlightenment, to the Georgians and to the Victorians, believes itself to be the most anxious age ever,” Mr. Stossel said.

That said, the Americans of 2017 can make a pretty strong case that they are gold medalists in the Anxiety Olympics.

“There is widespread inequality of wealth and status, general confusion over gender roles and identities, and of course the fear, dormant for several decades, that ICBMs will rain nuclear fire on American cities,” Mr. Stossel said. “The silver lining for those with nervous disorders is that we can welcome our previously non-neurotic fellow citizens into the anxious fold.”

#anxiety #worry #age of anxiety

0 notes