#where my dreamself was getting tired

[abundantchewtoys]

HS^2 reread till p407 - reaction post

So, in preparation of Homestuck 2 restarting, I’ve reread the whole first few pages.

First I reread the epilogues recap page, then the story proper up until page 407.

It was a good refreshener, because a lot of events were already gone from my memory or very vague.

Which, given the nature of Candy Earth C, is rather appropriate, heh.

Reactions under the cut!

That Dirk called his ship Theseus may say something on how he views his mission.

Then again, he declared himself the villain of the story.

page 4: he called authors alliterative, I wouldn't really call 'AH' that, nor his full name.

Rose really goes hard on the 'being a robot' thing. I guess between Aradiabot, Jadebot, and AR, it was time for someone to unequivocally enjoy the state.

p5 : Cool to see his 'omniscience' is only pseudo, like Doc Scratch' was. He didn't know about the missing landing gear.

Hah, and Rose still sees Dirk as heroic. Pretty blind for a Seer of Light.

p6 : OOh, I still had dark mode on, I realize. Let's change that 'n return to the old format, it influences the feel of the story, especially Dirk' bright text.

p9 : You know, it feels like a missed opportunity not to command him to shit his desk.

p12 : Okay, pretty sure I didn't spot Jade's mug on the well, flower mug on my initial read. I own that mug, actually.

And oh yeah, it was a three-year journey to the new planet, nice parallel to the travel time between Universe B1 and B2.

p13 : So, uh, Bro had a relationship with Barack Obama, I'm reading this right, right?

p15 : Dirk claims to have researched his trollsona extensively, yet doesn't display their blood colour on his shirt, smh.

p17: Riiiight, Terezi was aware of Dirk's narration, as a Mind player, right?  

And hah, as a troll, with Alternia's awkward synonyms, her roasting Dirk for his verbose prose? Gold.  

Pff, and I forgot Dirk was tired of Rose's psychoanalysis, too.  

p33: Right, both paths were distinguished by the arrows.  

p34: It's heartwarming to see Jake actually having mastered the supposedly basic (yet oft neglected) skill of housekeeping.

p38: We never really saw Jake have Skaian dreams, did we? His Prospit self never woke up on account of a peanut allergy.

I wonder if the dreams of a non-awoken dreamself could have ever been prophetic...

And anyway, he's his ascended self now.

Hmm, but right, his dreambubbleself did have a rather prescient twist to it, in the form of Brain Ghost Dirk...

p41: Speak of the devil, I forgot about this part here, heheh.

Soooo, wait, we're getting back in muddy waters.

Jake is from the post-retcon timeline, where Vriska was on the meteor.

But the ghosts in the Furthest Ring weren't duplicated by the retcon.

If we assume they only met the post-retcon kids chronologically (for them) afterwards, there were a bunch of conversations that happened twice.

And Aranea's ghost 'survived' the Game Over timeline aka got thrown back to the Furthest Ring.

Still, it's gold to have Brain Ghost Dirk be his own self, distinct from ascended Dirk.

p47: "DIRK: You’ve spent years feeling sorry for yourself, totally convinced you made the wrong choices and that it’s all over. And it’s easier that way, isn’t it? If you’re a lost cause you don’t have to try to be better."

That's the challenge for the Candy timeline people isn't it? Continuing to try even if it feels like nothing matters.

Brain Ghost Dirk stopped correcting Jake there that he didn't actually was Jane's running mate, since he wasn't that Dirk.

Well, 'I' and 'you' could be seen as located between air-quotes, of course...

P54: Jake being hopeful again probably triggered the return of Brain Ghost Dirk  

P59, 60: The new kids’ quirks are something to get used to again  

P64: Almost seems like a Hope glow, around the car  

P70 : By shedding his purple sweater, we now see Tavros is dressed in layers similarly to Calliope & Caliborn.  

P90 : Note how she doesn't even really counted Jake as part of her family, there.

P95 : Gotta love cross-culture influences on Earth C, like the carapace derp face.

P96 : Introducing the world's most pollutive missile.  

P97 : You'd think once it reached critical speed it wouldn't need the propulsion anymore. Maybe the sails actually serve as (stellar) wind breakers, hahah, and the giant pipe is a countermeasure.

p101 : Showing Karkat has started living at human hours since he's asleep at 5 AM, n'aww.

p105 : Meat timeline folks just keep on being couped up in small spaces for extended periods, don't they?

Meat timeline just really focuses on the cabin fever side of things.

p108 : I swear I forgot Dave pointing this out :p101

p109 : In the story people & the appearance of them in other's minds is important. It's the same for the old Homestuck kids.

Who they are and who they were to us are two separate things.

At the same time, in story, who they are to each other is also very important. Brain Ghost Dirk's a culmination of that.

p114 : Dave really just drew the short stick there w/r his best friends' fates, didn't he.

And Bro still casts a long shadow.

At least it's good to see Dave is in a somewhat good place. Just a little sad he has to basically be a hermit apart from some close friends to achieve it.

p115 : So Karkat never really was close with Rose, interesting.

p130 : I wonder if Dirk started discarding things "pointlessly difficult and irritating" as a way to cope with his isolation growing up.

Roxy had the carapaces around, he only had seagulls...

And eesh, being your ascended self, as in, knowing full well what you'd do in any situation... Really kind of sucks, doesn't it? Not seeing room for growth for yourself.

p131 : So, recap: A2 was coded blue and had a purple game design. A1 probably had the reverse.

B1 was coded red and had a lime green game design, B2 was the reverse.

The C universe is coded white (see: the door they went through) and the game design will be cyan.

Meanwhile, Dirk and Rose's species might be associated with the color purple & orange.

Kind of makes you think of Prospit & Derse, doesn't it?

Makes you wonder if the trolls in A1 were also guided by their universe's gods, or not.

p133 : 10:25 hours ago

p135 : "ROSE: It's amazing what pieces of inconsequential information your mind can recall at a moment's notice, a whole decade after they were last relevant or interesting to anyone.

ROSE: ...

ROSE: I think I missed this."

Appropriate, given that it's been so long since Homestuck ended.

p141 : Basically, Dirk's DNA was used to animate the result of the alchemization. Not ecto-alchemologization, but more like... alchemogenesis?

p144 : Trial 'n error creation of species, with of course, Dirk focusing on the equine & Rose on the cephaloid. (Is that the right Latin word for tentacle-y?)

Right, Rosebot was only a projection of Rose's consciousness.

Weird to think stories about the Psionic survived two squashed rebellions. Then again, he was )(IC's Helmsman for the remainder of Alternian history.

"ROSE: Now [Earth] is protected, in the steady hands of a duly-elected ruler, sure to have a boring and uneventful perpetual term in office."

Ah, if only Rose could see into the bonus stories :P Guess they don't count as part of her domain. ;)

"ROSE: What value is a marriage, temporary domestic bliss, if all is lost?

ROSE: You understand this bargain.

ROSE: At least, you should. It's one that was made to leave you alone.

ROSE: Is your resentment towards my choice about Kanaya, or about V–"

Not sure I understand this fully. Does Rose feel like she had to leave Kanaya because Terezi didn't give up on Vriska?

p146: Calliope embraces irrelevance as Dirk embraces the opposite

P150: Forgot about this part. Good for Jade, not being kept down.

P160: Guess Caaliope has a preference for orsnge juice’s strings because it’s a bit like tendons from red meat? Maybe?

Trials and errors like Dirk’s with DNA, but for food. Wouldn’t Dave have still have codes from the meteor trip?

P171: Getting insight into how red & black romance works for Vrissy, might help us understand where it all went wrong for Vriska.

P172: Vriska trolling herself there

P194: Vrissy - Harry - Tavvy - Yiffy?

P215 : Oh right, Roxy lived in the Carapacian Kingdom? So then Harry just went to and from the human kingdom for school? And the human reporters have crossed the border to report?

P222: Derpy black-haired kid hiding a surprising amount of brawn. Truly, Tavros fits right in with Jake, Jade & John.

P223: Gotta love John was waiting on the "highest point of the building there", while they had to "ascend".

P232: "from somewhere out of a half-remembered dream, comes the sensation of falling. A burning golden city. A girl's screaming." Oooh, [S] Descend reference!

P234: Ohhhh, their naming their daughter like so wasn't 'really' serious, but a result of a a game between them taken too far, I really forgot that!

P240: Forgot that Jane really did <3< Gamzee.

P268: And that the trees walked

P286: Got to say, Aradia and Dave’s unruliness reaaly meshes well with the narrative device of Alt!Calliope’s speech+captions

P339: Maintainer of Peace and Plenty is sure one way to fill in the role of Maid of Life!

P401: Candy John crammed himself into a house-shaped box in a spiritual sense, Meat John got crammed in one literally.

Got to say, I wonder if the June Egbert crowd will get theirs in the end or not, with what John was not saying here. Mostly it might be the topic of masculinity and how to fill that in, I personally think.

P404 : Don’t tell me Dirk & Roxy have the Hiveswap portals under their respective curtains

P405: Didn’t we visit the meteor on Candy Earth before?

Or was that in the Epilogues/bonus stories?

P406: “the natUre of space and time is a little finicky in here” as in, time flows faster? Or geography & history are just weird and inconsistent?

See: Jake having gotten send divorce papers according to the epilogues, or The Felt, Ms Paint & Spades Slick ending up on Earth C according to the snapchat logs...

"CALLIOPE: [...] as far as i can see, there's simply no way for Us to commUnicate with the world oUtside the black hole.  

CALLIOPE: i woUld certainly be very sUrprised to find oUt that anyone had managed sUch a thing!

JOHN: ...right."

Terezi & John communicated just fine through John's Dad's PDA. Is there anything the device is not capable of?!

Ooh boy, and now I'm caught up again!

Seems like the "prelude" to Beyond Canon is done now!  

Wow, feels oddly comforting to be in the thick of it again.

I'm just going to buckle myself to this ride again.

The idea is to not go too deep into analysis this time around, but hahah yeah, that boat'll float till it sinks.

#homestuck #homestuck^2 #reaction #upd8 #john egbert #terezi pyrope #homestuck 2 #dirk strider #alt calliope #davebot #tavros crocker english #vriska serket

[soudakuwunmoment]

DirkJake Dreamworld [NSFW]

I wrote this instead of sleeping lol Uh, so yeah! DirkJake NSFW! Hope you enjoy:)

"Golly gosh, another long day!" he huffed with a satisfied tune. "That robot sure takes a lot out of a fella, I'll say!"

Jake pulls on his pajama pants, becoming damp from the shower water still dripping from his hair. A quick shake and water sprays everywhere, he laughs lightly to himself.

"I've been in an awfully good mood today, I wonder why that is? No matter, tomorrow is another day of adventures, better rest up!"

Jake didn't realize quite how fatigued he was until his sore bones hit the soft sheets and his eyelids suddenly dropped. He was so tired, yet his good mood only hummed stronger. A feeling most euphoria-like, he couldn't help his grin as he drifted to sleep.

A gentle breeze. From where? Jakes room doesn't have any windows. The presence of another person makes itself apparent, and his eyes shoot open in alarm, ready to fight, but he only manages a squeak at what he sees not 5 inches from his face.

"D..Dirk..?" Could it be? ..What was he wearing? Where was this? Jake was dreaming, right? Why was Dirk in his dreams, and why did he seem so.. real?

A warm breath tickled his face. This is the real deal, alright.

"I-I have.. so many questions!"

No response. Dirk seemed to be lost in thought, his emotions naturally unreadable, even now in person. Jake gave him a nervous tilt of the head, then glanced around to better take in his surroundings.

A simple bed in a room with a globe for walls and a roof. Almost no furniture, yet it still felt eerily similar to his own room. The edges were dark and foreboding, except for one area of the room, brightly lit by a singular window, letting in a dazzling yellow light from outside that made his eyes squint and cast a glittering sparkle on the floor.

No time for that! Although, time seemed to have stopped. Dirk continued to just stare, mouth hanging open just slightly as though in awe or shock. Jakes hand touched Dirks cheek gently before he had even realized he moved it, bringing a sudden flush to his cheeks.

'Naughty hand! It's no good to go caressing the cheek of my good pal the first time we meet!'

He quickly tries to pull his hand away but just as swiftly he is held in place by a surprisingly warm and soft hand. Is he getting closer? Oh boy.

Dirk drags in a sharp breath,

"Jake," fuck his voice is so smooth, what is even happening? "Jake, I.."

Jake shifted to sit up but was pushed back down with Dirks free hand, a bit more roughly than he would have expected. Jake could have sworn he saw Dirks face heat up slightly.

"Hey, I'm so happy to see you, pal! But, uh, what's going on..? Where are we? I'm all kinds of befuddled!" Jake smiled nervously and attempted to sit up again. Dirks grip didn't give in the slightest. Jake felt a jump in his gut at that, ‘but why?’ Jake frowned. "Di-"

He was cut off by lips on his. His breath hitched and every thought in his brain screeched to a grinding halt. He waited for the kiss to break so he could ask Dirk what the hell he was thinking, but his chance didn't come. To his dismay, he finds himself returning the kiss, which he also did not remember giving his body the permission to do.

A tongue presses against his lips, not a moment later it's inside them. Jake panics again, realizing he doesn't have control over his body, and he feels the vibration of a moan. He doesn't know whose it was, but likely it was Dirk who was turned on to all hell by how eagerly Jake had accepted him.

Finally, the kiss breaks for a breath of air.

"Dirk-!"

"Jake! Shh!!" Dirk sounded annoyed, Jake felt a sting in his chest.

"B-but-"

Dirk leaned in closer, mouth right next to Jakes ear, causing him to shudder. Then, in a low, urgent voice;

"Jake, we don't have forever, alright?"

It was a lie. Not fully, as they would indeed wake up at any time. But now that Jakes dreamself was awake, they could meet every night if they wanted to. Jake didn't know that yet. He simply nodded, getting the point, and the kiss resumed with more urgency, Dirks hands pushing up the inside of Jakes pajama shirt.

This wasn't how he thought his first time meeting his best chum would be. But.. if this was the only time they would get to see each other, he would admit that he would probably rather be doing this than learning about all the details; those could wait for the waking world. It's not like he had much of a choice anyways, as his body continued to move without his permission, doing things far more daring than he would ever do consciously.

Dirk grunted at the feeling of his pants being tugged down an inch. In an instant, he reached down and pulled them off entirely on his own, uncannily floating above the bed to do so before dropping back down. A small startled gasp came from Jake before he was cut off by yet another kiss.

Jakes pants were next, then his shirt. He whined and Dirk removed his own as well.

Then for a moment, all they did was stare at each other, pupils dilated with lust and love, feelings neither knew the other had. Everything was moving so fast, but for some reason it felt okay if it was him.

Another kiss, a palm pressing down on sensitive skin, muffled and desperate moans before they had even really done anything of significance.

"Fuck, Jake. You have no idea how long I've waited" he panted out between kisses and whimpers.

"F-For wha- mff!" His mouth was suddenly filled with 2 long fingers. His ears burned hot.

"You don't need to understand. Just know this has been a long time coming. Suck." The latter half of the sentence seemed to come out more as a growl. Jake obeyed and eagerly licked the fingers and covered them in saliva, his brain not quite processing why Dirk would need slicked up fingers.

As Dirk waited, he impatiently rutted his hips against Jakes, causing a pleased drawn out groan from both of them. The dry humping continued, cocks only separated by two layers of thin cloth.

Jake once again tugged down at the last obstacle between them, bringing a smug grin to Dirks face which did not help the fire in his cheeks. In a blink, they were completely stripped. Neither bothered to look down, they were content staring into each others eyes. Say, when did dirk remove his glasses? His eyes are such a vibrant orange, it made Jakes heart swell.

However, his heart wasn't his only swelled organ, and Dirk intended to see to that. He removed his fingers from Jakes mouth, scissoring them in the air to test just how wet they were. Drops of saliva trailed in drops down Dirks arm, sending shivers up his spine. Yup, that'll do, Jake. That'll do.

Just now it seems to have dawned on Jake the purpose that his spit would serve. Humiliation spread through his body like a wildfire, but Dirk just initiated another kiss and pressed a finger against Jakes entrance. Jake shuddered and moaned into the kiss at the sudden coldness against such a sensitive spot. His stomach muscles twitched as he felt Dirks dick press against it, twitching a bit itself. He broke away from the kiss and shoved his face against Dirks shoulder, letting out a pitiful moan and showering his neck with kisses and soft nips. Dirk sighed and rutted up against Jakes stomach a bit, pressing his first finger into Jake with surprising ease.

"Ah, J-Jake, have you, nh.. do you..?"

No asshole could be this loose untouched. Dirk experimentally pushed the second in already. The muscle clenched around him, and he heard a whimper from Jake signaling that this was enough to hurt. He stopped, slowing his soft thrusting to a stop also so as to not accidentally hurt him. 

A moment passed, then a shaky breath, then Jake attempted to push himself down on Dirks hand. A really fucking sexy way to signal he wants more, and who is Dirk to refuse?

A third finger. Jake hissed through clenched teeth and Dirk pulled back to kiss him again, doing everything in his power to distract him from the pain.

Eventually, Dirk could move his fingers. He heard a soft moan and began searching for a specific spot, continuing to pepper Jakes entire face with kisses.

"Fu-uck, Dirk--! Ah! Ah, Dirk, right there!"

Found it.

Dirk memorized the spot, and pushed against it a couple more times before stopping, pulling his fingers out and looking down. Neither of them would last much longer. Dreamselves were strangely sensitive, it seems.

Dirk came back from his thoughts and looked back up at a whimpering and pouting Jake. He couldn't help but smile.

"Don't you want something better?" His voice was so low it almost hurt his throat. But it was worth it to see that Jakes face could in fact become a deeper shade of red, contrary to popular belief. He didn't need an answer though, as if the actual forest fire on Jakes face wasn't enough of one already. He was already pressing the tip gently against the already slicked hole.

Jakes mouth was once again busied with passionate and loving kisses while his mind strained from burning pain. Compared to before though, it did not last long. Three fingers seemed to be the perfect amount of preparation. Just as he managed to catch his breath again, a completely different feeling flooded his nerves. Pure pleasure. Dirk was already nailing Jakes prostate repeatedly with pinpoint accuracy. Any pain from the speed was swallowed whole by such a shocking amount of pleasure that all of Jakes muscles locked up and his eyes rolled back instantly, mouth open in a silent scream. His whole body trembled, schlong especially. This was so unfair. He wanted to enjoy it, but now he was just moments away from his limit. A brief stop,

"Sorry, Jake. At that rate I was going to finish first."

Then the movements continued, only faster, and Jake gasped breathlessly at what Dirk said, and at the desperate breathing he now noticed against his ear. It was just too much, so much, it was perfect, oh god,

Jake shot up from his sleeping position, panting, out of breath, the brunt of his orgasm spilling to wet his pants. He grunted and gripped the sheets, unable to help but flop back down, arch his back and grip his still clothed dick as he rode out the climax.

"Fuck! Agh, Dirk! What the hell!" The sounds of panting and gasping filled the room, then,

Silence. It was morning. Jake came to terms with the fact his heart rate wasn't going to slow down anytime soon. He laid for a few minutes until he could at least breathe properly, then sat up again. He glanced over at his phone. The screen was lit up with a message.

timaeusTestified [TT] began pestering golgothasTerror [GT]

TT: Have fun? That's a rhetorical question. I know you did. Congrats on waking up, let's do that again tonight.

#homestuck #dirkjake #dirk strider #jake english #homestuck fanfic #dirkjake fanfic #homestuck smut

[moondragon618]

I should probably make an intro post huh

Well here it is ig lol

You can call me Moon or Moondra, and Luna or Lunar is okay too :) My pronouns are they/them, it/its, she/her, + multiple neos which I'll list here:

xey/xem/xeir/xeirs/xemself (this one works like they/them, eg. xey are/xey're)

lun/lunar/lunars/lunarself

moon/moons/moonself

dre/dream/dreams/dreamself

sh:)/h:)r/h:)rs/h:)rself

drae/draer/draers/draerself (this one works more like she/her, eg. That's draer cat, That cat is draers)

dra/dragon/dragons/dragonself

🌙/🌙s/🌙self

🐉/🐉s/🐉self

Feel free to use any of these, and also feel free to ask me about how to use the neos if you're confused :)

I am bi and questioning if I'm aroace-spec, and I'm a genderfluid enby- more specifically I'm fluid between any combination of feminine aligned, neutral/androgynous aligned, and an assortment of xenogenders lol :) I'm fine with any gender-neutral terms and pretty much all gendered terms outside of male/female and woman/man, though I do prefer gendered terms to be used in a lighthearted/joking way rather than seriously lol <3

I'm also (self-diagnosed) ADHD + Autistic and have social anxiety- be warned I'm often very slow to answer asks/reblogs/DMs/etc and that's probably why lmao

I'm currently a dsmp/c!primeboys enjoyer as you've probably noticed lol but my other interests include Gravity Falls, The Owl House, Undertale/Deltarune, the MCU (specifically Irondad lol), Markiplier/Unus Annus, and the Legend of Spyro trilogy (my first fandom <3)

I am also fictionkin- my c!Dream kin tag is ad infinitum :) and my Protegeinnit kin tag is everlasting daydream ❤️

I tag all of my c!primeboys posts with c!prime thoughts so they're easier to find bc I reblog a lot and post rarely lol

Here's a link to my Ao3 and here's my writing tag which has all my fics + me talking about my writing lol

Some AU tags I use sometimes:

Immortal c!Prime (also includes Divine c!Prime where c!Dream becomes a god and makes c!Tommy into an angel)

Shapeshifter c!Dream AU (exactly what it sounds like lol)

Hybrid c!Prime AU (in which c!Dream in an ender dragon hybrid and c!Tommy is a cardinal avian)

Reblogs from my c!Prime RP blogs (@haver-of-wives and @your-eternal-nightmare) will be tagged with rp c!Prime :)

My reblogs will all be fandom tagged except for non-fandom stuff which will just be untagged.

And just to be very clear about this due to Certain Recent Events: I absolutely Do Not support cc!dream in any way.

I enjoy c!Dream strictly as a fictional character. I completely understand if others personally find c!Dream posting uncomfortable and if that's you, then you might want to block me. If you harass me over this, or for not supporting cc!dream, or any other reason lol, enjoy getting blocked on sight <3

As for a DNI, I don't really care as long as you're not on some terf shit, generally just hateful and/or bigoted, super NSFW, or shipping incest or adult/minor ships (p*ppytwit/blr this means you too stay tf away from me istg). Also cc!dream stans will be blocked on sight, and c!Dream apologists I Do Not fucking trust you lmaooo

Oh also I tend to avoid discourse posting but if I do it will be tagged as such. I try to tag for triggering content as well and feel free to let me know if I should tag something. (also be warned that I occasionally forget to tag if I'm doing some late night reblogging and really tired lol. I usually notice it and fix it the next day though)

And don't be alarmed if I suddenly switch fandoms at some point that just kind of happens sometimes lmao

Anyway that is all and welcome to my deranged fandom blog <3

[theacewithoutgrace]

Hey so uh I had a nightmare whoops if you wanna read it go ahead ig

tl;dr — lucid dreams are fucking horrifying if you aren't careful (semi exaggerating but you'll see my point)

also tw for a bunch of stuff considering its a nightmare i dont exactly know all the stufff to tag rn but there'll be a warning when it starts getting bad

if you'd like me to tag everything tho just say please i dont wanna offend or scar anybody sniff

it started off with me in class, except the class was the room of a computer science tuition i went to for only a month in 2020. i had this fur coat too and either my art or english teacher was presenting something, i dont know

then my eyelids started getting heavy, so i put my head on the desk and fell asleep for a bit. literally just by this fact alone i think i already knew it was somewhat of a lucid dream, but my dreamself didnt mention it in the plot. i did wake up once here and then go back to sleep while like leaning on my friend sitting next to me, who just let me sleep cause she's irl famous for always sleeping in class

she woke me up when it was over and we had to switch classes, i dont remember the conversation but i talked to the girls near me in line while going downstairs. its what id usually do normally too, nothing seemed out of the place. it was all really natural in the moment at least, now its all just eerie since im lowkey traumatized by everything coming up holy shit

i immediately fell asleep in the new class too once i got there. also i only notice this later on, but the whole room was so strange. there were a lot lot of broken light fixtures on the ceiling leaking water, and the floor was constantly wet and had these really ugly ass dirt looking black and white marble tiles. try imagining that classroom from the one fight scene in mob psycho 100 where the school just evaporates. i think it was on the 2nd floor

the leading teacher woke me up and told me to go outside for a ceremony because i apparently got selected as one of the candidates for this competition (which i actually gave a submission for just yesterday) i didnt take it seriously, and was still tired, so i went back to sleep. when i awoke, everybody had left- it was just be by my lonesome. i looked outside and the ceremony just then ended too. still not registering that it wasnt real, i ran outside upon spotting my mother in the crowd

when i reached the end of the stairs, i was inside this pub bar thing with all of the other candidates and their parents. apparently my parents just took the uh, 'certificates' they gave. it was like, flowers in vases? i got 3? im not sure what this means, i dont remember the type of flowers. i got mostly red ones, other kids had other types too, it has literally nothing to do eith the actual event i submitted for tho

between the class and the pub scene was when things started getting eerie for me, its when i noticed all of the off broken things in the classroom. i cant fully explain it, but it all started feeling just noticeably slightly off,,,,,,,

there was a great time skip, and i was in my own room, wearing the clothes i am in right now. it was 1am, and it felt like it was ramadan?? i dont know how to explain how it 'felt' like a literal religious month but ok. i think it has to do with everyone still being awake and the cleaning. oh yea, so, when i went to my parents room, some of my classmates were there cleaning and repairing stuff. my parents said they asked them to help when they were at school while i was asleep

everyone in the house was awake doing stuff, all the lights were on and it was noisy, but i clearly knew it was 1am. i think i mightve seen a clock but im not sure if im just remembering seeing the actual clock at 1am before i went to sleep irl. so after my classmates left, i sat next to the door along with two girls from the grade above me. i dont even know who they are, but i just knew somehow i guess

i was talking to them about calculators, specifically about how some older models sometimes give wrong answers and how i liked that my one worked perfectly without me having to switch into degree mode or something. i kept getting interrupted, and actually couldnt finish explaining it to them, cause my social studies teacher was also there? and needed to leave through the door i was in front of? ok then

it time skipped just a little bit more again, and i was upstairs in the 5th floor (im on the 3rd). well, i say 5th floor, but this place doesnt look like the actual 5th floor, its entirely different. ive been to this place in my dream a few times already now, so it kinda felt normal. the 'living room' was really small, the only way i know how to describe it is like its half of a resort hotel's bathroom. the fancy-yet-outdated-design counters and beige yellow cream brown and maroon colour palettes and all. although i dont see it in this dream, the bedrooms look like the old and new house of one of my mom's friends

my aunt offered me some chocolate banana bread, and i ate it while seating in this weird place, i could barely even put the plate on the table cause it was shaped weirdly. this aunt of mine always offers me food when i go to her room, so ive had dreams before where i eat food in this weird dream room. but this time, my grandma and other aunt were there? and they were gossiping about something having to do with me? they first mentioned the weird table counter but then they went onto something else. dream me didnt hear anything - or i just dont remember, but, at then it almost felt like they knew what was going to happen next. like they were talking about how im a poor little meow meow and will have to go through all the upcoming shit

i was above average uncomfortable and left, and then arrived back on the 3rd floor. ok now look i swear it feels like a alot of shit happened here somewhere in this dream but i dont exactly remember. we're getting close to the end of this now.

i was in my parents' room, everything looked normal. it was around 6 - 7pm? again, not sure how i knew, just felt it. it was really windy and the windows kept shaking, so i tried to hold it down for funsies. thats when i noticed,, these pipes? In my eyes they just suddenly appeared out of nowhere, but after seeing them it felt like they were there the whole time, without me noticing. the steampunk-esque pipes were like all across the room btw. I actually even saw them in the part where my classmates appeared, but i didnt enter the room at that time

I first saw the pipes when looking at the top of my window, it was dented somehow without the glass being broken, and the pipe went through it and outside. i started semi panicking, while my eyes traced the pipes back into my room, and saw them everywhere. i looked back outside the window after opening it, it was somehow morning again. as soon as i looked, there was a small explosion. a huge smoke cloud blew into my face, there were people outside my house, screaming

this scene particularly made me start actually panicking, because there was a fire near my house around a month ago maybe? and at the time, it was really scary - as everyone in my house thought our house was the one on fire, due to the way the smoke came. my aunt and i were the first ones to see it, and it looked exactly like the way i saw in my dream. i really didnt wanna live through that moment again

ok so uhm tw it gets really gorey here? mentions of death, blood, violence, such and such

i closed my window, and laid down in my bed halfway sitting, trying to comprehend everything. it was back to the 6 - 7pm again, but this time it was heavy raining. i really didn't want to, but my dream self opened up the window again, and,,,, there was this woman, being stabbed by some guy. there was screaming, and people running around everywhere. the people on the street heard it, there were running, they saw it, they know it, but no one came to help her. i was horrified, but no matter how hard i tried to peel away from the window, close my eyes, and block it all out,, i couldnt stop staring. i couldnt control anything anymore, yet i was practically already completely awake at this point. i wanted to wake up.

i was trying super hard to blink, just merely shut my eyes, practically begging my dream self to do so. it worked for a little bit but it wasnt enough. i finally stopped when i heard my mother's voice in the living room. i finally closed my eyes, the screaming and sounds of heavy storms stopped. i waited for a few seconds to calm myself down before going back to the goal of waking up in real life

except, i couldnt open my eyes anymore. i felt myself blinking intensely, desperately trying to see the room i was sleeping in irl, but it was all black and reddish. i was on the verge of tears pls - and when i finally managed to open my eyes, it was only halfway. i kept blinking over and over, saying repeatedly that i wanted to wake up

and then, i did. i saw the room, the room in real life. i was actually awake for a few seconds. but, i couldnt move. i still wasnt fully awake, every part of me was tired. i wanted to get up and run away so badly, and yet, when i blinked again, i was back to the dream world. however, i was able to get up

i ran to the living room, all of my family was there. i asked them, if it was finally all over, if i was awake for real now. they sat silent, all just staring at me. I knew it, I'm still in the dream, aren't I? I wanted to scream, and cry so badly. I tried too, but it was no use. I couldnt go any louder than this specific limit. If I tried, it sounded like i was aggressively whispering while losing my voice. the screams of the woman in my front yard were so vivid, yet i couldnt. yknow that fun fact about how your thinking voice while reading also cant be louder than how it usually is? i think it has to do with that actually. so yea, not-so-fun fact

i looked at my parents, trying to find an answer, a way to get out of this mess. I wished they could help me, they could tell me, and they could hold me in their arms and tell me everything's alright, that it's over now. But they too, were silent. I ran back to my parents' room, and they were there, on the bed, smoking cigarettes? my mom doesnt even smoke, but my dad does smoke everything in existence other than weed so eh. they were also the younger versions of themselves? Just above 18 i would say? I kept pleading for the way out, but they kinda just continued smoking, slightly grinning. kinda making fun of me i guess?

in the end i just dropped to the floor, knees all wobbly, crying - well, crying but, no tears were flowing, and i couldnt make a sound. i think i eventually passed out in the dream from being overwhelmed, and once again, i woke up in the real world. I could move, I shouldn't moved, I should've stood up and walked away from the bed. but y'see, I already was sleep deprived, and had less than an hour of horrible sleep - I was tired ok. I ended up just staring at the ceiling trying to calm my breathing for a few minutes, before accidentally falling asleep again. I actually did consider leaving the room at that time, but uh, I was afraid that seeing the uhm, not safe things in the kitchen while in a mental state like that would give me thought i really did not need

i was back in the living room of that dream world. at this point, i kinda accepted that id be stuck there for a while. i'll just wake up to my alarm to go to school, yea? its going to be ok - everything would be fine, as long as i just did nothing. it will only feel like a few minutes right? it'll be morning any time now. i hoped. anyway, my aunt said something to me before going to her room to sleep. i knew that there was nobody else in the house somehow too. things were pretty quiet for a few minutes. i just kinda looked around, trying to comprehend everything

then suddenly, miku (the vocaloid in case you didnt know ndjhjsjd) showed up? not her usual clothes, but like casual summer short sleeve white crop top with shorts look with her hair down. the plot went down like it was dating sim now?? i mean, there was still no 'plot' but yk what i mean shh. it kinda went like, those my talking tom games? or the ddlc talking to monika thing? it was just miku talking to me, though i dont remember anything that was said. okok but then, i somehow triggered a cutscene? which looked like those 'emotional montages' of lovers having a reunion at the beach during sunset or something, but it was just in my living room.

the important part is how it ended tho. i twirled miku around a few times holding her hands, grabbed her by the waist, then threw her up. she started floating, like it a slowmotion scene, but she ultimately came back down when i grabbed her again. it happened directly below where the ceiling fan was. when it ended, i was thinking - wow, it actually isnt that bad this time. maybe i wont be traumatized further, bleh. for some reason, the cutscene repeated, and,, i really shouldn't have done it, i don't know why i didn't do it willingly by myself, but, my sanity was probably slipping away. when miku started floating,,, i was curious, what would happen if i just, purposely not pull her down,? would my brain allow it to happen? would it really make me see,,,?

when miku floated up, i wanted to see how my brain would even create the image for me, of miku, being chopped up by the ceiling fan. i can somehow still remember, the way she grabbed arm, telling me to stop, telling me to please not let go - and I, forcefully shoved her away? And in the end, I didn't see it happen, but I heard her screams. and saw her laying on the sofa, bleeding out with her head half open- and she started like, having a breakdown, like she suddenly understood that she isn't real and that the dating sim esque thing was fake, that it wasn't all cupcakes and rainbows?

the were bloodstains everywhere, on the ceiling, walls, floors, on myself - my vision had a red tint too, and the room was shaky like an acid trip or something. this weirdass deformed baby thing appeared too?? think of like, the regular show artstyle, but semi 3D. everything was loud. miku crying, her echoes wailing, the baby thing pointing and laughing at me, insulting and shaming me- apparently i just- couldnt take it anymore- its literally all in my head, so its not like its illegal, but its still a horrible thing to do i guess. i just began kicking the cursed baby thing. it wasnt human afterall. everytime it passed out, it became a more deformed version. it eventually turned into this weird green thing that looked like slime in a transparent sack. imagine one of those stress toy type stuff but gooey.

the dream finally, actually ended, when i gave up kicking the thing, and threw the leftovers in the trash. up until the final moment, everything was still loud and ringing in my head. the laughing and screaming. when i woke up, i still couldnt really believe it. but i felt the coldness of the air conditioner and heard the super loud sound of the fan next to me, so it had to be real. i checked the time on my phone, and relied washed over me (i only got an hour of sleep apparenly) but, that relied didn't last for long since i started crying nfjndjhd. ive had sadder, more worse dreams, where my parents die or something. but somehow, this dream really affected me alot- ive never had a dream quite thing gorey i know at least

ive been kinda purposefully staying up for a few days now, only sleeping after really really exhausting myself so my brain wont have the time or energy to put me back there again. also because im afraid but ok- also, the reason i googled hatsune miku horror games was because i swear ive seen games where it was creepy and almost just like this. where everything was fine until you do something wrong. but, i think i mightve been thinking of a mix of ddlc and this game called 'can your pet'. which, i watched back in 2017 or something?? also, i mightve thought of miku in a horror game because of the vocaloid song 'bacterial infection'

uhm anyways, if you read this, i apologize, sorry, you probably shouldve stopped huh- this is probably trauma dumping or something i dont even know im sorry s o b

#tw gore #long post

[gangstaluigi613]

It's 4 in the morning right now.

Have you ever woken up from a dream where you knew you'd wake up?

With events occuring that you yourself can't even comprehend? And not like in a "million different things happened like this and this and.." way.

But in a "profound deconstruction of life" sense.

I can't sleep now.

#it's 4am #when I'm writing this #late night thoughts #weird dreams #dreams #all I remember #is the very end #where my dreamself was getting tired #and knew that when he went to sleep #i would wake up #so he tried to stay awake just a bit longer #to confuse the screen in front of him #by telling it that it was curious #and that it wanted to ask a simple question about machines learning emotions #and my dreamself said it wanted to ask #Why? #the screen turned red #and new text appeared saying #Yes. Why? #that's when my dreamself #hugged a pillow #layed down on the bed #closed his eyes #and as soon as he did #i woke up

[waterfall-mirage]

So I wanted to write some theif Chat Noir and Marichat and came up with this

Sorry if the spacing is off this is being Sent from iPhone™️

A criminal.

Explained simply by the dictionary: a person who has committed a crime. A lawbreaker, delinquent, villain, culprit. These are all words you’d associate with someone who lived a life of crime.

So clearly- speaking in an obvious term- one should not get themselves into any trouble of the outlaw type. Yet somehow the bad luck seemed to find Marinette everywhere she went. She didn’t know when the infatuation had started, but she could remember seeing him on the news a few weeks ago when she had gotten home from her internship with Agreste fashion. She had to stay late as Natalie had requested her to revise some upcoming fall designs. As tired as Marinette was there could possibly be no way she could turn down an opportunity to add her own touch to such a massive collection.

Stepping through the door she lazily threw on some sweatpants, let her hair down from a tight headache inducing bun, and flicked on the small box t.v that sat on her kitchen counter. There was a low humming noise from the device as it tuned to find a channel. Marinette rolled her eyes, she needed to save up for an appliance that wasn't almost older than her. She turned away grabbing the pink kettle off of her stove filling it with some water. Another classic dinner for a starving artist, instant ramen. Pulling her bowl and chopsticks from their designated spot she listened into the news channel. Chat Noir had struck again, this time a watch store. The helicopter cam followed him as he seamlessly bounced between the roofs of homes. Marinette stepped forward from her position of leaning on the stove trying to get a better look at the tiny screen. Dressed clad in black as usual the unknown street cat did what he does best vanishing in between two buildings, a considerably dark alley even for seven o’clock in late summer. The helicopter hovered for a moment before the screen changed back to Nadja Chamack. Marinette let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. Turning back to the stove to finish her meal. Chat Noir was a force to be messed with, he had already stolen three paintings from the Louvre successfully, rumours saying his fourth was nearing soon. The police have no clue on where to look or how to find him. Nicknamed by the public Chat Noir was “the vanishing kitten”. The name undermined his work, so he claimed he was going to step it up a notch.

Although Marinette never agreed to be a part of it.

The sweetest of dreams were brought to her that night. A wonderful extravaganza of her showing off her very own fashion line at Agreste fashion. The theme was 1960’s era mixed into modern fashion. Blissful, teals, reds, ivories, yellow, pinks dancing along with patterns, skirts, and thigh high boots washed over her. An Airy white translucent button up blouse with bell sleeves paired with a deep red pencil skirt. She could feel her dreamself twitching to start the sketching process. However, instead of witnessing her dream unfold she was unfortunately startled out of it in her dark room. Marinette rubbed her eyes as the sirens of Paris’ police department whizzed by flashing red and blue lights briefly through her windows. Groggily she reached over smacking her night table until her hand came in contact with her phone. Squinting at the brightness the phone displayed the time of two in the morning. She groaned pulling the pillow over her head to try to drown the noise out. Until she heard a thud from her balcony. Blue eyes opening behind the soft pillow Marinette’s heart dropped at the sound.The wind must’ve knocked one of her plants over, that's all. She sat up peering over to her french doors there was nothing to be seen in the pitch blackness of the night. Marinette let out a sigh of relief, what was she thinking? She placed her pillow back in its original position laying back down.

“C’mon, Marinette” she whispers to herself. “Get a grip”. She closed her eyes once again.

Chk. Chk. Chk.

Then she hears it, a slight rattle. A familiar rattle, the same rattle she’d dealt with when she first moved in trying to unlock the door. She now knew there was a slight left turn jiggle she had to do to get it to unlock. But clearly this intruder isn't one of the friends Marinette told this trick to. She panics jumping out of bed, she has no place to hide in a studio apartment. In the dark she blindly reaches for any sort of weapon. Her small hand grasps the baseball bat her dad had given her as a defense weapon when she moved out. Of course at the time she laughed at it but still hugged her papa anyway, joking that she’d take up baseball soon. Her blood goes cold, what an awful thing to come true, she thinks.

The rattling stops Marinette lets out a mini sigh, maybe it was a Chat Noir copycat that just wasn’t cut out for the robbing life. She lowered the rod down her shoulders sinking a little. “Whew” she manages to let out.

Then the door swings open. Marinette holds back a scream lifting up her weapon “Whoever is trying to get in here I don’t have much but I will defend my life for it!” She pathetically calls out in no particular direction. Marinette can’t see much of anything until she spots them. Two glowing green eyes in the darkness of the room. She lets out a tiny shriek waving her bat around, she feels a “thwoop” in her hands. In fear of the unknown Marinette swings her arm frantically towards the wall her fingers just barely smacking the light switch. The baseball bat which she thought she had acquired was actually an umbrella, that was now spread. Still holding her guard Marinette lifts the “weapon” pointedly towards the black figure in her partially lit apartment.

A chuckle leaves the cats lips as he walks towards her. “Aw, Princess opening up so soon? We just met” he smiles coyly at her. The hairs on the back of Marinette’s neck rise. Up close Chat Noir is handsome, which Marinette decides is very unfair as she’s currently being robbed by him. However, she’s also certain he couldn’t be much older than her as well. Which gave her a bit more confidence to tell him off. As he approached she jabbed the umbrella at him which humoured the cat as he lifted his hands up in the air as if he had been caught in the act. A devilish smile displayed in amusement. Chat Noir began to move in closer and she got a better look at the thief. His golden hair disheveled in front of his face casting a slight shadow over his viridescent eyes which seemed to glow. There was a black mask covering his upper face from cheek bones to brow. Black cat ears were perky twitching as he moved as if picking up on things. He had a small black pouch tied around his waist which seemed to be full. Marinette speculated it was used to stash smaller items such as jewelry or watches as he had stolen earlier that day. His boots were somehow quiet as he maneuvered towards her. She tried to keep distance with the umbrella at arms length but quite true to his cat nature he slipped through the barrier. Red and blue lights flashed outside her apartment once again. Marinette left with only a few options left resorted to the cry for help. As she parted her lips the cat seemingly doubled his speed to prevent what he knew was about to happen his leather clad hand covered her mouth in seconds.

“Shh they’re coming.” He coo’s pointing upwards and winking as the sound of a helicopter chopped past them. Marinette noticed a puff of air that had left his chest. A sigh of relief most likely. “Chat Noir, charmed to meet you” He turned to her, sneaky green eyes burning a permanent image in her mind. He gently removes the umbrella from her grasp lifting her hand to place a kiss on her knuckles. Marinette makes a face in disgust retreating her arm back to her side.

“You are?” Chat continued on pretending Marinette had not just clearly shown she wanted nothing to do with him. A smile so sweet perked up his features even the baker’s daughter felt her stomach protest. Marinette confused, and quite frankly still scared gathered the courage to fiercely bark back at the mangy cat. “None of your business, now leave!” She crosses her arms over her chest. He sighs in a feigned love sick kind of way placing the back of his hand against his forehead gloved fingers curled. “Such a shame I don’t get to match such a pretty name to an even prettier face” his body language shifts and a devilish glint in his eye shows he’s toying with her, playing with his prey before he feasts. “However, I think Princess suits you well.” Chat practically purrs. Marinette can’t help the shiver that runs down her spine. Her cheeks heat up and she curses her body for being weak to even a compliment from a criminal.

“Relax, okay?” He spins the now closed umbrella between them. “I’m not here to rob you, i'm here for refuge” Chat states matter of factly before turning away from her and walking around her apartment like he owns the place. Spotting the kitchen a little “oh!” leaves the self proclaimed non-burglars mouth as he struts over to the fridge. Marinette who was previously frozen to her spot comes back to reality. Well who does this mangy cat think he is? She stomps after him shutting the fridge. Chat Noir mewls pulling his thumb out of the closed fridge door suckling on the injured digit. “I don’t know who you think you are, but you don’t just go around taking refuge in random peoples homes!” Marinette whisper yelled pointing at him. Chat rolls his glowing eyes still sucking on his thumb. “Now look at me im involved in your stupid crime” she pokes his chest which she refuses to admit is very hard at the moment. He gives her a deadpan as if to say “yeah, yeah, i’m listening”. This enrages the bluenette further.

“And give me my umbrella back!” She swipes the black umbrella from his greedy paws. Marinette marches over to the still open french door the cool August night breeze flowing into her apartment. “Out!” She calls pointing with the umbrella. Chat grins a cheshire smile appearing ear to ear. Marinette isn’t completely sure how to feel about his demeanor. A snicker leaves him and his shoulders bounce as if to show his amusement.

“Oh, i’ll go” Chat smirks walking towards her from the shadows of the kitchen.

“But I like you princess” he firmly states. Chat Noir saunters towards her in true cat fashion in long strides of his legs. Marinette's heart rate picks up as he nears. What is going on with her? He’s close, too close Marinette decides. When she takes a step back it’s into the door she realizes she can’t get enough distance between them. His nose mere centimeters from her face she blinks, once, twice, his glowing eyes still boring into hers.

“So I'll be seeing you again” he whispers. Marinette’s breath hitches, hands pressed to the glass door behind her. He salutes her with a wink “Goodnight, Princess, see you soon!” With that he leaps off of her balcony and into the night. Wide blue eyes stare at the bright white moon. Her hands clutch her chest wrinkling her newly made pyjama shirt. “Oh Marinette what have you gotten yourself into now” she whispered into the night. Marinette slid down the door continuing to keep eye contact with the moon. Safe to say she didn't sleep well that night.

#miraculous ladybug #i have more to post the word doc is 5k #just testing the waters loll #i havent written in a long ass time #sorry if its bad but it needed to be out of my word doc #marichat #marinette dupain cheng #chat noir #maricat #adrien agreste #miraculous tales of ladybug and chat noir #theif chat noir #ml fic #ml fics #mlb fic

[ambergrief]

had a dream i moved to the forest to get away from the city and the suburbs and an old man left his ranch to me because i had done him a favor in his final days. on his ranch were only two animals: a very tall pregnant horse, and a smaller male horse. i had a lot of tasks to take care of around the ranch, and i even enrolled in a beginners painting class down the mountain where a lot of other mountain dwellers did activities to hopefully make some friends and relax.

in that class i met the brother of the old man, and as we talked he promised he would take me under his wing and help me get the hang of running a ranch by myself. something told me he had ulterior motives, and it kind of baffled me that an old man i barely knew would leave his property to me, instead of his brother, his only living relative. i think the brother was trying to swindle me out of the ranch, but my dreamself brushed off any suspicions, considering i was very very new at taking care of property and i was kind of desperate for guidance.

he showed me how to take care of the small variety of crops that were growing on the land, and even showed me where to forage for the wild growing berries around the edges of the property. he taught me what kind of feed to give the horses, and how to be prepared for when the pregnant horse gave birth, which was going to be soon.

as he was teaching me about the horses, his tone dramatically shifted from one of a gentle mentor to cruel and stern. he expressed the importance of the horses, and told me if i failed to care for them something very very bad would happen to me. this scared the christ out of me and i promised i would do everything in my power to see they were taken proper care of.

as the days chugged along i grew increasingly tired and weak from the daily chores and duties i had to fulfill. even though i only had so much time in the day for leisure, i made it a point to go down the mountain for the painting class. i really enjoyed painting and i wanted to establish some good will from the other mountain dwellers so i’d have some friends to look out for me, considering i was a 20 year old running a large property alone in the middle of the forest. unfortunately even in my dream realm i was very shy and it was pretty difficult for me to try and start conversations with anyone. for the first few weeks i hadn’t made a single friend. still, i like being surrounded by other people and the class reminded me of days i’d spend at school back home.

as time went on i spent more and more time down the mountain, attracted to the people and shops, ignoring my duties and regrettably letting the ranch suffer a little bit. i was walking down the street when it hit me that i hadnt fed the horses in a while. i rushed up the mountain and ran in a panic to the stable. when i got there the horses looked very ill. their food trough was dry and their water trough was dirty and murky. i ran to the shed to get more food and water, but then realized that i hadnt bought horse food in a while, and i only had enough to feed one of them. i decided that the life of the pregnant was more important, and put the food in her trough, reasoning with myself that the male horse could always fight the pregnant horse if he wanted any food, which is pretty fucked up but this was my reasoning.

i drove down the mountain to buy more food for the horses, but when i came back up, the male horse was dead, and the pregnant gave birth to a stillborn, and old man’s brother was there waiting for me at the stable. he told me he warned me about the importance of the horses, that i failed, and that i was going to pay the ultimate price. he chased me with a rifle, and i ran to my car drove off, and he got into his truck and chase me around the mountain roads, shooting at me.

as i tried to escape, i noticed more and more people emerging from the woods and brush, yelling at me to stop. they knew that i fucked up, and were trying to kill me as well. so as the old man chased me in his truck, i was also being shot at from all the different angles, as i tried to dodge the people running into the middle of the road to stop my car.

after a while of chasing me, the old man lost control of his truck and crashed into a tree, and after losing him, i managed to make it onto the highway south, and started to make my way back home to the southern coast.

#dream #long #this ones like a short story lol

[interviewswith-warfstachetonight]

Interview: Vriska Serket (11/20/19)

Interviewer: Wilford Warfstache (WW)

Interviewee: Vriska Serket ( @aquaticculler ) (VS)

Date: Nov. 20, 2019

Time: 12:33 AM - 2:33 AM (CST)

(*”8″ = “B” and “eight” sounds; I.e “no8ility” = “nobility,” “expect8ions” = “expectations”)

WW: Okay! I think I’m all set- now.. you were a blueblooded troll, correct? Did bluebloods have any set roles or expectations? (Like how jades were more or less all caretakers, from what I understand.)

VS: I was a cerulean, yes. Expect8ions were really just what you'd expect, nothing too out of the ordinary. Our caste was mostly just the troll version of "lower upper class", we had the 8enefits of wealth without the responsi8ility or expect8ions of no8ility

WW: Well, that certainly sounds like it’d be interesting..! Were there any, ah.. differences?, I suppose?, between the blues? (Ah.. teal, cerulean, and indigo, I believe?) As in.. well, like physical abilities and such, how some trolls seemed to have certain abilities that others didn’t.

VS: Yes! Generally speaking, teal 8looded trolls (apparently) could "S3NSE TH3 1NT3NT1ONS OF OTH3RS" -something my terezi said, once. Cerulean 8loods like me tended to fall into one of two categories, either we could mind control to a certain extent or we had higher strength for lack of psychic a8ilities, on par with an indigo vs the normal cerulean strength. I was in the former camp so to speak. Indigos just had a8surd strength, that's kind of their whole deal

WW: And you could mind control, you say? Did you do that often?

VS: Not particularly, it only worked on castes with stronger psychic a8ilities (Rust, 8ronze, Gold) and for the most part I had no reason to

WW: Ah, that’s fair, that’s fair.. was it something you had to train/learn? Or was it more of an.. innate ability?

VS:  At it's 8ase level it was inn8, 8ut when I was a little wriggler I pro8a8ly had to practice it to get 8etter at it, I don't remem8er much of 8eing a wriggler though, that was thousands of sweeps ago. Or hundreds. Or millions. Time flows weirdly in paradox space

WW: Oh, goodness gracious, what in the world happened to bring paradox space into it all? Was that something that happened then or a matter of ending up here?

VS: I died as a god tier, then woke up in paradox space. After what felt like a very long time in paradox space I woke up here missing a lot of memories.

VS: I do remem8er finding this place though, it was a dream 8u88le and it looked interesting. Didn't know it was one way only though, we are 8asically stuck here

WW: Well, that’s odd, hm? Ah.. what is a dream bubble, exactly?

VS: Simply put, pocket worlds in paradox space

VS: Less simply put

VS: Dream 8u88les are essentially pocket dimentions typically created 8y memories of whoever is residing in them, and those are scattered throughout paradox space. Apparently though, "inworlds" can also 8e found there too, though I am presently unsure if only certain ones are present, or if every8ody's are. I also do not have an explan8ion for memory loss while travelling certain dream 8u88les and not others, perhaps there are different types that can 8e distinguished. I did not put enough time into researching them while I was active in paradox space

VS: At least that's how I see them

VS: I do know that they transcend canons though! I met our meenah in paradox space, and her canon is wildly different from my own

WW: How odd! I wonder if that means they still exist in our world.. (oh! And you mentioned a, ah.. god tier? What is that?)

VS: A god tier is a s8ur8 mechanic, as a method to reach higher powers according to your classpect. You find your quest8ed, which is a stone 8lock with your aspect engraved, wherever you're destined to, and then you die on it and merge with your dreamself, and gain a 8unch of powers

WW: And what was your godtier, if you don’t mind?

VS: Here's where I differ the most from other Vriska's, I was a seer of life

VS: And I still am

WW: Oh? What are other Vriskas usually, then?

VS: Thief of Light

WW: And is that a huge change? (As in, like.. total opposites or something to that effect.)

VS: It's not total oppos8s, 8ut it is going from an active class to a passive class

WW: And I figure that would be a big change? (At least, in the sense of a shift from one to the other.)

VS: That one isn't a huge change 8ut it is sizea8le enough

VS: Classpects are still highly de88d to this day, with no one set system of explaining it all is agreed upon

WW: Oh, that does sound like it could cause a lot of confusion..

WW: If you don’t mind my asking, what does a Seer of Life do? Or.. what can they do?

VS: Well a seer is the passive understanding class, so I understand life, and I invite understanding through life

VS:  Though life as an aspect tends to more dou8le down on your class, from source examples

VS: So in my case I understand [a lot] and I invite understanding through [usually oversharing]

VS: It's a little 8it iffy

WW: Well, that sounds interesting..! What do you mean by understanding a lot?

VS: Knowing things, seeing things (metaphorically, literally we're 8lind as fuck), just in general. In my time on this planet I've studied everything from mathematics, to 8iology, to quantum physics, to cooking, to astronomy, ect. ect.

VS: Of course I'm aware of my own 8lind spots, I know there are gaps in my knowledge, lots of them in fact

WW: And you said you overshare a lot? Does that ever cause any trouble for you?

VS: Sometimes, 8ut I also know when to shut my mouth so to speak. Whether or not I do is another matter........

WW: Well, that’s certainly a relatable statement— Has there been anything you’ve found issue in learning?

VS: Human anatomy

VS: Dear god what is with these 8odies

VS: Programming is something we've collectively had issues with, 8ut we're okay at it now

VS: And any form of art that isn't music or writing

WW: Oh? Is there a form of music you prefer over the others?

VS: Violin was always fun

WW: Violin? Is that one that’s particularly hard to learn?

VS: It varies from person to person, 8ut it is considered one of the more difficult instruments. All instruments have difficulties in learning though, so it's hard to r8 one over another in terms of difficulty

VS: Instruments we've at least started learning to d8 are(in no particular order):

-Voice

-Trumpet

-Trom8one

-Flute

-Cello

-Viola

-Violin

-Piano

-Guitar

VS: Though we were only competent at:

-Voice

-Violin

-Piano

VS: I have never 8een good with the voice, personally

WW: Oh, gosh, that’s a lot! Were you doing more than one at a time?

VS: We did voice along piano and violin. Other than that, no

VS: Some of those we did for less than a year

WW: What’s the longest one you’ve done?

VS: 5 years of voice pro8a8ly?

VS: May8e longer

VS:  *We only did viola for two weeks 8efore swapping to violin, 8ut I'm counting it 8ecause I can still play it through violin skills

WW: Oh! Is there a difference between viola and violin?

VS: Viola's are similar to a violin, 8ut are larger and play lower notes than a violin. It's 8etween a cello and a violin in scale and size, and is played similarly to a violin

WW: Ooooooooh! Well, I didn’t even know those existed, heh— and you mentioned writing? Is that something you like doing?

VS:  I personally don't write often, 8ut Eva likes to write poetry. She's also trying to write a 8ook

VS:  I guess you can count this as writing though, I do love answering questions or going on lectures a8out things

WW: It does sound fun! Are there any particular subjects you like talking about?

VS: Quantum physics, Astronomy, and Philosophy

VS: All at once ::::)

VS: They're all connected

VS: Well everything is, really, 8ut those three are the most o8vious

WW: How so? 

VS: Well using quantum physics to explain certain aspects of astronomy, and how they rel8 has several different theories that we do not have the energy to get into right now, 8ut it is fun to use those to 8oth prove and disprove free will ::::)

WW: Disprove free will?

VS: Mhm!

VS: Certain theories of how the universe works ends up with us having no free will at all

VS: That everything is predetermined, 8ut at the same time having free will

VS: It's the theory that I su8scri8e to that eventually the universe will stop expanding, then contract upon itself, and then eventually another 8ig 8ang in exactly the same way will happen. At the end of the day we're just atoms and electrical signals 8umping next to each other in a specific way, like a game of pool with a good enough computer if you run the same shot over and over again the 8alls will end up in the same exact place, right? It's the same concept only applied to every single particle in the universe. That we've had this convers8ion potentially 8illions of times 8efore in the same exact way and we will have it 8illions of times again. Oh 8ut this is usually the end of my ram8le on the su8ject, this is missing all the material that leads up to it

WW: Well, that all sounds quite interesting..!

VS: 8ut we are tired so the condensed version of the ending will do

WW: That’s quite alright! I’ve never heard it before anyways, so I’m simply happy to learn something new!

VS: I'm glad to have presented you something new and interesting to learn

VS: I'll go over other theories at a l8r d8

VS: We seemed to have side tracked quite a 8it whoops

WW: Eh, it happens sometimes!

VS: Or I have rather hahahaha

WW: Hey, I think it’s still just as valid! It is something you’re interested in, after all!

VS: Alright next question~

WW: Hm.. well, did you have anyone you considered most important to you?

VS: During my time alive in my own 8ody, pro8a8ly terezi. In paradox space, meenah (the one I'm here with)

WW: What was your Terezi like? (If you don’t mind sharing)

VS: She was a sylph of doom, she talked 8out the inevita8le a lot, rules, limits, things I don't care a8out. She was also really strict, 8ut I liked her. I can't remem8er 8ut we were either flushed or pale

WW: What do those mean?

VS: M8sprit or moirail, respectively

VS: Oh you don't- okay

WW: Well, I know they’re types of romance!

VS: Good start! So

VS: M8spritship resem8les typical human romantic rel8ionships the most, it's not 1:1 8ut there's a lot of love

VS: Moirailegence is like the human concept of soul m8s, 8ut not like "I love this person" more "We need each other", you t8ke care of each other and keep each other pacified and calm. Stopping them from doing stupid things, or they stop you from doing stupid things (or try to, and then they're there to say "I told you so")

WW: Pfft- Well, I can think of more than a few people I knew who were like that.. but no matter, ah- you said Terezi was a.. Sylph of Doom? What does that entail?

VS: Sylph is the passive cre8ion class, they create for others, and invite the creation of their aspect

VS: In this case doom, which is all a8out rules, limit8ions, f8, ect.

VS: It is the oppos8 of life, which is generally a8out freedom, choices, and change

WW: So, does that mean that she created rules and such for others? (Or is that what you meant by strict?)

VS: To all those reading along who are versed in classpects, I am extremely tired and doing a terri8le jo8 of explaining things

VS: 8ut yes, that is exactly what she did

WW: Did you think they were patricularly fair?

VS: Some times I have to admit they are, 8ut I'm not a 8ig rules person. I like to passively oper8 doing what I do, and usually that falls within the rules

VS: If I can't do something, that just m8kes me want to do it more, until I can do it

WW: Had you two ever had any fights over them? (And ah, that is- a mood)

VS: Small tiffs, 8ut nothing major most of the time

WW: Well, that’s good to hear! And, hm.. what’s Meenah like?

VS: Meenah isn't from my canon, 8ut I met her in paradox space

VS: She resem8les meenah from homestuck itself decently well

WW: Would you say that’s a good thing?

VS: She's nice, a 8it crass at times, I like her

WW: Well, that’s good to hear! It can always be a bit frustrating when people don’t get along.. and- hmm.. who would you say is somebody you didn’t like in your canon?

VS: Tavros

VS: He was annoying as fuck

VS: I 8roke his legs though, that was fun

VS: (On that topic, I also 8roke joke's legs too!)

VS: Or jape or whatever his name was

VS: I didn't like him either

VS: 8ut tavros I just couldn't stand

VS: (And now he can't either hahahaha)

WW: Pfft- Goodness..! What happened to lead up to that?

VS: He was 8eing super annoying while we were playing flarp, so I introduced him to a scenario where there was a cliff, and there was my mind control powers, and suddenly there was a tavros jumping off said cliff

VS:  I wouldn't do that again, I've mellowed out a lot over the sweeps, 8ut I don't regret it

VS: Terezi got pissed at me for that one

VS: That was the only major fight we had

WW: Well, I could certainly imagine- but, ah.. what is.. flarp?

VS: Fantasy Live Action Role Play

WW: Oh! Were there particular things you could do? Or just whatever you wanted?

VS: GM (Game master)'s discretion (aka mine), 8ut for the most part you could do anything. Funnily enough it also had classes like in s8ur8

WW: Oh?

VS:  I don't have the energy to go over that, so let's wrap this up with any closing questions you may have and then we can continue l8r ::::)

WW: Ah, alright! I believe the only closing question I can think of is.. what, if anything, do you wish people would stop assuming about you?

VS: Stop assuming all vriska's are 8ad! I'm working on 8eing 8etter 8y human standards, it's annoying to 8e written off as a 8ad person just 8ecause "Oh she's a serket what do you expect"

VS: Anyways that's all the time we have for tonight, thank you for 8eing here, and thank you whoever actually read all this

WW: Oh, I’m glad to be here! Thank you for allowing me to! (And I hope you rest well!)

#wilford’s interviews #11/20/2019 #interviews #wilford warfstache #vriska serket #interview transcriptions

[crippledboyfriend]

I’ve had a couple of medication changes (going off of morphine to different opiates and changing muscle relaxants) so I’ve not been sleeping as well, but it also caused me to have a really elaborate dream about Yuri on Ice. It’s pretty clearly inspired from some things I’ve seen on tumblr recently, and the character flaws were really evident to my subconscious. Now, Yuuri doesn’t do anything cringy-er than he already has in canon, but I know there are a lot of Yurio purists who don’t like the idea of him being in a sickfic or being remotely involved in anything where Yuuri and Viktor are all over each other. If this is you, this is not your fic. I still don’t think I’m doing anything wrong, but my dreamself cooked up something a little more extreme than I usually go for and I decided not to change it.

It Happened Once in a Dream

“Our opening act for Yurio’s exhibition is going to be so amazing!” Yuuri leaned into Viktor, hugging him. Viktor sat down the notebook with details about the routine in it and closed his eyes as his fiancé kissed his cheek.

“And it’s been going so well! I was worried that getting back into this would be harder for you,” said Yuuri. “Do you think you could maybe do another season competing alongside me?”

“Yuuri,” Viktor’s face fell. “You know I haven’t been feel well lately.”

“I-I-I I know, I j-just…” Yuuri stammered. “I got excited. Even if it’s hard, skating is our lives and you’ve been managing —“

“To a certain extent this has been fine, Yuuri, but I can’t keep this up.”

“Okay,” Yuuri got embarrassed. “I’m sorry, I was just hopeful, and you’re so strong, not that it’s bad that you don’t think you can push through the pain, it’s j-just…I know you really hurt your back, I know that. I believe you. I…I…please forget I said anything.”

“Alright,”

“I’m serious,” said Yuuri. “I don’t want you to think that I don’t believe you.”

“It’s fine, Yuuri.” Viktor smiled, but Yuuri couldn’t help but be nervous that it was fake.

“We should get ready for bed,” suggested Viktor. “Let’s make sure Yurio’s on track.”

“Y-yeah…”

Viktor got up and as he opened the door, Yurio stopped in front of him, pale-faced and tired.

“Oh, Yuri! We were just going to check that you were about ready to sleep.”

“I don’t know, Viktor,” Yurio looked down. “I’m not feeling too great all of a sudden…”

“When did this start?” asked Yuuri. “He was just fine…”

“I don’t know, my stomach started making noise like, an hour ago?” The blonde shuddered and covered a burp as Viktor placed his hands on the sides of his face.

“Mm, Yuri —“ Viktor started to comment on the heat as the teenager leaned forward and suddenly hurled on him.

“Oh, god,” Viktor covered his nose and gagged dryly as the hot mess settled on his bare feet.

Yuuri pulled the dog back by her collar and tried to slip around Yurio to leave the bedroom.

“I’ll go get paper towels,” Yuuri explained as Yurio hiccuped and threw up some more chunks on the floor.

Yuuri shut the door behind him to keep Makkachin out as he came back with the roll to clean up the floor and Viktor’s feet. Yurio was shuddering and had tears streaming down his face.

“Yurochka, do you think it was something you ate..?” Viktor asked, still covering his nose and trying not to look down.

“I don’t think he has food poisoning,” said Yuuri. “We all ate together.”

“I just…I don’t know why he’d be so ill all of a sudden,” Viktor trailed off, lifting his foot for his fiancé as he cleaned it off for him. “Is it on his clothes?”

“Yeah, I think he should shower if he thinks he can.”

“…I can shower…” said Yurio.

“Okay,” said Viktor. “I’ll…get in first. Yuuri, can you clean up?”

“Uh, yeah, um —“

“Great,” with his feet wiped off enough, Viktor walked to the bathroom and started to strip out of his filthy pants.

Yuuri brought the trash close and tried to pick up chunks of vomit from the carpet with the paper towels.

Yurio blushed redder and tried to take a paper towel to help.

“Sorry,”

“No, stay resting, I’ll take care of it,” Yuuri insisted. “Do you think you’re done?”

“No,” said Yurio.

“Okay, um,” Yuuri tried to think. “Why don’t you take off your clothes so the puke doesn’t get anywhere else?”

“Alright,” said Yurio, he slowly slipped out of his pants and left them on the floor vomit-side up.

“I’ll take care of it,” Yuuri promised, pushing several paper towels into the carpet to soak up the moisture. He tried to ignore the feeling of it on his hands as Yurio took his shirt off. Once he had taken care of most of the mess, Yurio was settled on the floor by the trash, looking weak.

“I’ll be right back,” Yuuri promised, slipping out of the room again. He lined the kitchen garbage with a new bag and got out some baking soda to bring back to the bedroom. Makkachin and Puma Tiger Scorpion both tried to follow him inside, but he managed to keep them back with just his foot.

“Here,” Yuuri handed the garbage can to the sick boy and put some baking soda on the vomit. Standing up straight now, Yuuri paused. He looked around and took in what had happened.

“Can I do anything for you?” Yuuri wiped away some sweat that he worked up in the hectic mess of it all.

“Umm,” Yurio paused. “I’ll just wait for Viktor.”

“Okay,” Yuuri nodded. “I’m going to talk to him.” Yuuri let himself into the bathroom.

“Viktor?” Yuuri called over the shower water. “I cleaned up for the most part…What should I do now?”

“I’m almost done in here, but could you take his temp before he gets all hot in the shower?” asked Viktor. “That would be fabulous.”

“Uhh, yeah, sure,” said Yuuri, starting to look around in the cabinet. “Found the thermometer. I’ll go take care of it.”

Yuuri slipped out and bent down on the floor next to the sick teenager.

“Hey, Viktor wants me to take your temperature,” Yuuri pushed Yurio’s bangs back and felt his forehead.

“Okay,” said Yurio as the older man turned on the thermometer and brought it to his mouth.

“That’s new, right?” Yurio asked.

“Huh?” asked Yuuri. “I don’t think so.”

“Viktor doesn’t take my temperature in my mouth,” Yurio explained. “He checks it in my armpit…and he’s had to put it in my butt when I was really sick.”

“Oh my god,” Yuuri sat the thermometer down and apologetically held Yurio’s face in his hands.. “I am so sorry. I didn’t know white people did that. I should’ve asked Viktor how he takes your temp. I don’t know why I just assumed this would be okay, I just got so frazzled, and I wanted to make this easy…” Yuuri blushed and stroked down Yurio’s cheeks. Then, he look away, nervously covered his mouth as he gathered his thoughts, and picked up the thermometer again to reset it.

“We’re in Europe, American boy.” Yurio looked a bit annoyed as he gazed off to the side, but he didn’t seem too uncomfortable with the whole situation. Yuuri was humiliated, but at least the kid seemed to forgive him.

“Here,” Yuuri took Yurio’s arm and pushed the metal tip of the device into his armpit. “I’m sorry. I’m really trying.”

“It’s okay,” said Yurio.

Yuuri still couldn’t believe that he was off the hook that easy.

The thermometer was ready when Viktor came out of the shower, completely naked except for a towel around his waist.

Crouched down by the younger skater, Yuuri took the beeping thermometer and read it.

“101.8,” Yuuri told Viktor.

“That high?” Viktor’s mouth gaped open.

“I can believe it,” said Yuuri, feeling Yurio’s face again. “Maybe even higher.”

“My normal’s probably lower than you’re thinking…” Yurio said softly.

Yuuri wasn’t completely sure what to make of that, but Viktor was ready to take over.

“Yurochka, do you need help in the shower?”

“No,” Yurio shook his head and stood up slowly, letting Yuuri take his clammy hand.

“Okay,” said Viktor. “If you take long, I’m going to check on you, alright? I left the shower on.”

“Alright,” Yurio agreed as he slipped into the bathroom and shut the door.

“Thanks for taking care of that,” Viktor frowned at Yuuri.

“Your welcome,” Yuuri looked away, not wanting to admit yet to humiliating himself while Viktor was in the shower.

“When he gets ill, it just triggers something in me,” Viktor shivered as he went to the closet for clean clothes. “At least I managed not to vomit.”

Yurio had become completely cuddly after getting sick again. This time, fortunately, it all went into the trash, and Viktor managed to excuse himself so he wouldn’t gag. After finding that Yurio’s temperature had risen, Viktor stepped out of the room to speak with Yuuri as he came in from taking out the trash.

“Do you think it would be okay to give him some of my prescription anti-nausea medication I’ve had left over?” asked Viktor. “It wouldn’t be okay, would it? It has harsh side effects…”

“No…Well, we do need Yurio to stop barfing so we can get fever reducers in him, though…” Yuuri started to go against his better judgement. “Do you think you could break it in half?”

“No,” Viktor folded his arms. “I’m just not sure what to do. This all came on so suddenly.”

“Do you think we have to take him to the hospital?” asked Yuuri.

“No,” said Viktor. “Well, at this rate, yes, but I think we’re worrying too much.”

“Maybe you should give him the anti-nausea,” said Yuuri. “I really don’t want to have to take him to the hospital, and I know he doesn’t want to have blood drawn.”

“I’ll try to get him to hold down a snack and have some sports drink with it,” Viktor decided.

“Where’s your medicine? I’ll try to research it and…” Yuuri looked around, realising all sense of time had been lost to him. “What time is it?”

“It’s just a little after midnight,” said Viktor. “And the pills are in the freezer.”

“Okay, I’m going to text my mom.”

“Alright. I’ll go see what sounds good to him,”

Yuuri was so preoccupied with translating Russian and writing to his mom for advice that he didn’t even notice what Viktor came back to get from the kitchen for Yurio. Yuuri’s phone beeped at the exact same time Yurio start to retch his snack back up. He rushed to the bedroom to take over for his fiancé.

“Aww, Yurio…” Yuri cooed and rubbed the boy’s back as he hiccuped. “I guess that didn’t work…”

After gasping for air, Yurio added,

“Maybe a cookie wasn’t the best thing to try,”

Even when not looking, Viktor could feel Yuuri glaring at him from across the room.

“Viktor, did you give him sweets as a snack to settle his stomach?”

“It sounded good to him,” Viktor reasoned, clearly regretting his decision.

“I thought you meant that you were giving him a handful of crackers or something,”

“Well, I didn’t.”

Yuri sighed and gently touched Yurio’s lower stomach.

“I’m sorry,” Yuuri said, and then he brushed back Yurio’s hair and fixed it back into a neater ponytail. “Viktor, I’m going to go clean this out, and I just got a message from my mom. I’m going to talk with her for a bit, and then we’ll finally know what to do.”

“Okay,” Viktor sighed and touched his temples. “Can you stay out and give us some privacy for me to examine him? I’ll open the door when I’m done.”

“Yeah, sure.” Yuuri forced Viktor into making eye contact with him as he left. Viktor gave an apologetic look and then raised his eyebrows.

Potya followed Yuuri out.

The cat kept rubbing up against the door, trying to open it from underneath with her paws as Yuuri finished talking on the phone.

“Potya?” Yuuri called as he hung up. “Potya, here, kitty, kitty.”

Puma Tiger Scorpion ignored him, so Yuuri stood up and went to the door. He listened to Viktor and Yurio speaking softly in Russian. Yurio had the hiccups, and Viktor sounded so comforting. Yuuri smiled, a little less angry at him for feeding Yurio poorly.

“Yurio? Potya really wants to check on you. Do you mind if I crack the door and let her in?”

Yurio and Viktor spoke in Russian a bit more, but they both clearly heard Yuuri.

“You can let her in; I’m taking Yuri’s temp, but I’m mostly shielding him from the doorway.” Viktor decided.

Yuuri slowly cracked the door and Puma Tiger Scorpion pushed her way in. As Yuuri closed it again, he could see Viktor’s back facing him, tending to Yurio as his bare legs stuck out. Yuuri blushed and leaned up against the wall, a bit aroused. He really didn’t mean to see anything, and technically, he didn’t see anything, but seeing Viktor tending to the sick Russian just turned him on. The way Viktor was watching over Yurio, making sure he was doing the absolute best for him to make him better…Yuuri could picture himself in Yurio’s position and couldn’t believe that he was marrying someone so kind and attentive.

Yuuri sat back down and waited on the couch with Makkachin. His reaction felt disgusting. Yuuri was completely ashamed for seeing what he saw.

“I’m the worst.” Yuuri thought. “They shouldn’t have to deal with me.”

Viktor was out in just a minute.

“Alright, rectally, Yurochka has a fever of 104. I’m going to try to keep an eye on it, but I’m really worried, what did —“ Viktor got distracted by the embarrassed look on Yuuri’s face. “What’s the problem?”

“I-I saw,”

“You saw?”

“Well, I didn’t really see Yurio, I just saw you, for like a split second, but I saw your muscular back and you were tending to him so sweetly…You make such a hot dad and doctor…”

“Oh,” Viktor looked a bit confused. “I don’t think Yurio needs to know you just saw me; you shouldn’t be ashamed. He trusted you to let the kitty cat in, да?”

“I-I know,” Yuuri bit his lip and turned even redder. “I’m sorry, it was just erotic to me, and it shouldn’t have been. Why am I like this? I just got excited, and I could picture myself with you watching over me…and just…you looked so loving…I’m sorry.”

“Yuuri, it’s alright,” Viktor innocently smiled and turned Yuuri’s chin up to face him. “But I’m scared for Yurio. Please tell me your mother told us that we’re getting everything wrong and we can just change our ways and make him better.”

“Actually, I sort of can tell you that,” said Yuuri. “But we’re going to need to stay up with him and check his fever every hour or so until it lowers and he’s done throwing up, but I don’t think you need to do it that way each time unless you or Yakov or Nikolai really think so. Since this came on so fast, she hopes it should go away fast, too.”

“Okay, I can totally stay up,” Viktor nodded, eager to hear what else Yuuri had to say.

“But, she doesn’t think he needs any medicine or anything not natural so it’s okay that we haven’t been able to give him anything to take.”

“Good,” said Viktor, still seeming a bit unsure at that statement.

“If he can hold things down later, we can give him some fever-reducers. And to her it sounded like simethicone would help make his belly feel better, but he doesn’t need it.”

“Okay, I’ll look for that.”

“I know we just went to the Asian market, so I should be able to cook him something that should settle a lot better and make him less nauseous. You look for that medicine and keep getting him to drink, okay?”

“Alright,” Viktor gave Yuuri a quick kiss as Yuuri stood up to make some rice porridge. Fortunately, it looked like they had green onion and ginger for him to follow his mom’s recipe perfectly.

Yurio sat down the bowl after a few bites, and Yuuri gently rubbed the boy’s tummy.

“That’s good, take a break.” Yuuri offered.

Yurio’s stomach was making a lot of noise, and the gurgling made them all nervous, but they were all impressed and relieved that he hadn’t started vomiting already with the way the night was going.

“I feel a little better,” Yurio yawned and took another bite.

“Thank god,” Yuuri smiled, and Viktor felt the side of Yurio’s forehead with the back of his hand. His temperature wasn’t letting up yet, but it wasn’t getting worse, either.

Yurio finished off the sports drink Viktor had given him, and Viktor took it and stood up.

“Should we switch to water now?” Viktor asked Yuuri.

“Yeah, I think so,” said Yuuri, turning to the patient. “That okay with you?”

“Yeah,” Yurio nodded. His lips were chapped and he looked exhausted.

Yuuri was really tired, too.

As Viktor left to get water, Yurio looked up to Yuuri and told him,

“Thanks for cleaning up after me,” The food tried to settle in Yurio’s bubbly tummy.

“No problem,” Yuuri promised, and Yurio turned to hug him.

“I’m glad you’re here,”

Yuuri gently stroked down Yurio’s back, thinking that maybe he hadn’t done more harm than good like he had been worrying with each mistake he made that night. Him and Viktor were both still young and trying to figure things out.

#yuri on ice #yoi #viktor nikiforov #yuuri katsuki #yuri plisetsky #emeto #fanfic

[citrus-feline]

Maybe like once or twice every two weeks I'll have a dream where my fucking toilet is filled to the brim with clothes? What the fuck does that mean? Why the fuck do I see it in my dreams so often? It bothers me SO MUCH. Like usually my dreamself interacts with stuff in this case as "anxiety overload" and end up crying because for some reason this weird shit is my fault and I can't seem to handle it?? Sometimes I will get over that and try to like get the fucking clothes out of it but like you can probably guess just how grossed out I would be doing that, all while cursing at myself for "always doing this"????? What the fuck. Sure, I leave clothes on my bathroom floor at lot, but Wow is that vastly different. Idk I usually keep weird dream symbols like this to myself esp if they are gross but this has been happening for months now and I'm so tired of it.

[strangeauthorarchive]

About Chaos

inspired by @pyonkotchi‘s MWDH post (which, btw, if u love magical girls you should play it! it’s super cute!) i decided to make one about my book, Chaos

under cut because oh buddy dis LONG 

Chaos is the first book (out of possibly five) in a series of sci fi/fantasy/action/adventure novels. (the second book is Skies, third book is Truths, fourth book is Control, and the fifth and last book is Anew)

For nine years, following the disappearance of his father, sixteen-year-old Nick Riverson has had nothing but unanswered questions in his life. But it seemed that no matter how much he tried, he could never get an answer. As a result, he’s on the verge of just giving up entirely, never expecting his father to come home, or any explanation as to why he left in the first place.

That all changes when he rescues his new neighbor from an attacker, who claims to be looking for his father. Soon, a mysterious messenger warns him of a group name Chaos, who have made it their very goal to hunt him down, dead or alive.

It appears that his father has left a lot of secrets behind when he vanished. So, with the help of his new neighbor, some friends he makes along the way, and his aunt and uncle, Nick sets out to find his father and learn the real story behind his disappearance–all while trying to stay alive in the process.

The main characters are:

Nick Riverson: The main protagonist. He’s a black, determined sixteen year old boy who’s main goal is to find his father, no matter the costs. However, he also has a huge desire to keep anyone he cares about safe, due to an incident that happened when he was seven that haunts him to this day. He’s a boxer, and his fighting style is close range.

Adam Maroon: Nick’s new neighbor. He’s a shy biracial (black mother and white father; identifies as black) fifteen year old boy. He moved to Nick’s neighborhood with his older adopted brother in order to start a new life, following their parents abandoning them. After his life was saved by Nick, he loyally follows him on his quest to find his father, with hopes that maybe he could see his parents again as well. He’s an archer, and his fighting style is long range.

Marie Spring: A local baker. She’s an outgoing sixteen year old black Latina trans girl. She meets Nick and Adam when they arrive at her bakery, and after hearing their story, decides to help them out. For she has seen what Chaos has done, and was tired of people not taking action against them; she refuses to sit by while familes are destoryed. Her fighting style is mostly long range, since she has flower shaped daggers in her hair that she uses as some sort of boomerang.

Jackson Ruth: An inventor, inspired by Nick’s father. He’s a strict seventeen year old biracial (black father and Korean mother) trans boy. Originally from the UK, he moved to the states to get away from his family and start a life on his own. After Marie tells him about Nick, he decides to help them on their journey, providing them with weapons that are powered by mysterious pearls. His fighting style is mostly close range, using an electric glove to shock people.

Akira Michi: A man who was at the wrong place at the wrong time. Only twenty years old, he left his home in Osaka to take up a teaching job in the states. Unfortunately, he had no idea that this would lead him straight to Nick and Adam…and into an adventure he did not sign up for in the slightest. While he’s very reluctant, he does decide to help fight as well…with his car.

John Richman: Nick’s friendly cat-loving uncle and Thomas’s younger twin. He’s his town local gunstore owner, though times have been slightly hard. Recently married, he and his wife live a simple life. At least, as simple as it could be. That is, until he discovers that his nephew is on a dangerous journey to find his father. Even though he clearly resents his brother for reasons unknown, he decides to help out his nephew. Anyone that messes with his family gets a shotgun blast in the face.

Abieyuwa Richman: John’s loving wife and Nick’s caring aunt. She’s a Nigerian nurse, who almost everyone in the town loves and respect due to her caring nature. She’s a pacifist, and therefore doesn’t fight or has any fighting experiences, but she still tags along on the adventure and becomes the team’s healer. However, there are days where she wonders if she’s truly making the right choice.

The story is very much shounen anime inspired, and thus, has a lot of shounen anime inspired characters and tropes. However, while it is an action series, the main theme of it is learning about others and learning about yourself. As a result, there’s a huge emphasis on friendship (and some romance as well!)

The first ten chapters are available, just so you can get the feel on how the story and the rest of the novels are suppose to go! Note that this is still a draft, so many things might be/will be changed, but hopefully you can get idea on how the story is suppose to be!

You can also learn more in depth about the characters here! The pics are dreamself/rinmaru/kisekae place holders until I either get an artist or my art improves. Hopefully lol

The (still in progress) blog about it is here!

Thank you for reading this super long post about Chaos!

#author makes a speech #chaos stuff #oc stuff #like or reblog if you can pls!

[promptoargentumsgirlfriend]

Fix You

And here we have the first fic! And it’s full of angst! This is part of something I’ve been doing for years now called The 100 Songs Challenge, so it’s a song fic set to Coldplay’s Fix You. It’s not “canon”, it’s just something I wrote because the idea came to me. Either way, enjoy the angst.

When you try your best, but you don't succeed When you get what you want, but not what you need When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep Stuck in reverse "equius! youre here!" The blue blood's eyes flashed open at the sound of the voice. He jolted up from the floor where he had been lying, unable to recall how he got there in the first place. He searched around the room, trying to search for the source of the voice which had awakened him. As he did, he noticed that he was laying on the floor of his hive. But... that was impossible... His hive had been destroyed. Right...? So how was he here?

"dont worry equius. you must be confused about all this, but youll remember everything in time." The voice spoke once again, causing Equius to move his head around the room once again. "look up." the voice suggested. Equius did as the voice told him, looking straight up. Floating above him was a female troll with red wings and pajamas. Her horns were curled like a ram's, sparking some memory back into the blue blood. "D--> ...Aradia?" The girl nodded her head. "D--> Aradia, what's happened to me? Why am I in my hive? And why are you a god teir?" he asked. "im sorry, but there isnt any time to answer those questions." Aradia said, landing on the floor beside Equius. "there are things to see, and little time to see them!" "D--> What do you mean?" Equius asked as the scene around them began to change. "see for yourself." Aradia said. ---------------------------------- "Hello~? I6 anyone there~?" Kumori called out, trying to find anyone who would still be alive. After recieving a message from Karkat that  some trolls had gone on killing sprees, she became nervous over the state of her friends. She had to check and make sure they were still alive. She tried trolling some of them, but she recieved no answer from anyone. The only thing she could do was look for them herself. "Hello~?" She stopped walking. Not too far away from where she stood, she could see a few trolls lying on the ground. She couldn't make out who they were, but she knew that them just lying there couldn't be good. She ran as quickly as she could towards them, worried thoughts rushing through her head. She just hoped that if they were dead, that neither of them would be- And the tears come streaming down your face When you lose something you can't replace When you love someone but it goes to waste Could it be worse? Kumori stared at the two bodies that lied in front of her, a look of pure fear on her face. Lying there were the bodies of two of her best friends, Nepeta Leijon and Equius Zahhak, and neither of them were breathing. Equius wasn't breathing. Lights will guide you home And ignite your bones And I will try To fix you "No...no...thi6 can't be happening~!" Kumori shouted, falling to her knees. "No~! They can't be dead~! YOU CAN'T BE DEAD~! WAKE UP~! EQUIU6, PLEA6E WAKE UP~! YOU CAN'T DIE~! NOT NOW~! EQUIU6, PLEA6E~! I'M BEGGING YOU~! PLEA6E~! ...Plea6e~" her pleading stopped as she burried her face into her hands, unable to keep control of her tears. It was no use. Equius was dead. He wouldn't wake up. Ever. No mater what she did, no matter how much she wished, nothing could bring him back. Unless... High up above, or down below When you're too in love to let it go But if you never try you'll never know Just what you're worth It was a crazy idea, but it was worth a shot. Kumori grabbed hold of Equius, taking deep breaths in order to prepare herself. If she was going to do this, it had to be now. Without second thought, Kumori planted her lips on Equius with the hope that he would wake up. But it was no use. His dreamself had been slain. Lights will guide you home And ignite your bones And I will try To fix you "...No~" Kumori had no ideas left. That was it. Equius was lost to her forever. "...Equiu6~ I never got to tell you the truth~ I know thi6 won't matter anymore, but if I don't tell you now then I never will~ Equiu6... I'm flu6hed for you~" Lost in her sorrow, Kumori didn't even notice the sound of honking drawing closer to her --------------------------------------- "D--> Aradia...is what she said true?" Equius asked. "yes. every word is true." Aradia answered. "she wanted to tell you but never got the chance to do so." "D--> How long has she felt this way?" "for quite a long time now." Tears stream down your face When you lose something you cannot replace Tears stream down your face And I... Equius could only stand there in thought. All this time the turquoise blood had been flushed for him, and he had never given her the time of day. Her friendly behavior towards him, Nepeta's pestering of how the two of them were doing, it all made sense now. The only question was why? Why him? Out of all the trolls on Alternia, why would she be flushed for him? "D--> I suppose it's too late anyway." Equius said. "D--> Besides, there is no way we would ever be..." He stopped there and began to walk away. Tears stream down your face When you lose something you cannot replace Tears stream down your face And I... Aradia watched as the blue blood left, dissapointed in what had happened. "oh well. i tried." she said, about to fly off to another dream bubble. "...Aradia~?" Lights will guide you home And ignite your bones Aradia turned at the sound of another voice, seeing that Kumori was looking right at her. She was looking straight at her with dead, white eyes. "Aradia, what'6 going on here~? I don't feel like my6elf...~" And I will try To fix you...

#Snapshot speak #Strong Mint

[foxhenki-blog]

Both Sides of the Veil

FRONT MATTER

“I have frequently wondered if the majority of mankind every pause to reflect upon the occasionally titanic significance of dreams, and of the obscure world to which they belong” - H.P. Lovecraft

I worked ahead for all my posts this entire month, researching them, planning out their proposed course, which included pulling this quote. Little did I know (but should start to suspect at this point, really) how significant this quote would be for my practice.

I think I mentioned in my post last week, that I put my daily practice on hiatus. Mainly because some of the behind-the-scenes stuff in my life wasn’t going the way I had planned or enchanted for, and I needed to take a step back to examine my practice, which is hard to do while you’re in the middle of it. At least, it is hard for me to do. Daily practice can get tiring, in fact, that is a big part of the point, the sacrifice. I had been calling out (trying to find other terms other than ‘working with’) to the planetary spirits, the decans, and a trio of saints, Barbara, Cyprian, and Santa Muerte, but for two weeks now no candle has been lit and no incantations uttered.

It was Sunday night or Monday morning, when I had the dream. I was in a house, a cabin maybe, it was rustic and not a place I had been before. You know, those kinds of houses that you visit in a dream, or landscapes, they seem familiar but strange at the same time. I had the sense that I was in that house because I was ghost hunting. I walked from a furnitureless middle room into a living room. There was an old console television with pictures on top of it, and a ratty chair. It was not a big space. There was a hallway to a closed front door leading off of the living room. I don’t recall any windows and every surface seemed to be made of wood. My attention was drawn to the pictures. There was one, a portrait of a man that frankly, no one had any business taking a picture of. He was a sailor and I saw his first name on the frame; ‘Boone’. My dreamself knew that was the spirit in the home.

I had a ball, or a piece of foam, and knew that a particular part of the house, down the hall by the front door, was a trigger point for paranormal activity. I walked out of the living room back into the middle room and threw the ball down the hallway. It hovered in mid-air and was kicked back to me. I repeated this a few times and then, maybe bored, maybe seeking a stronger point of contact, I called the spirit in the place out by the name I had seen on the picture frame. I demanded that he appear.

The entire house responded. The walls, doorframes, wood panels and flooring, began to tilt to shake with a terrifying ferocity. I was genuinely petrified. Standing there, trying to maintain my bearings in the tilting crooked shifting reality of the place, I felt an arm and hand reach out and grab my left arm. It grabbed it again and again and my terror reached the point that I was more animal than man, at which point I tried to bite the phantom hand that kept grabbing me.

That is when I woke up, as my wife pulled her hand away from my dream bite in the real. We laughed a lot about it later. She rolled her eyes at ‘another ghost dream’, not in a, I-don’t-believe-you way but a why-you-haz-so-many-of-these way, if that makes sense. She said she was used to getting bit by our two year old, who is teething now.

Laying in bed right after the dream I tried to make sense of it. At first I connected it to our own house, thinking maybe there was a spirit there, a local in-the-place spirit trying to make contact. But then, later, the spirit’s name popped back up, I had heard it before, in a Rune Soup Premium Member Q+A cable. I don’t recall the question, only Gordon White uttering the phrase ‘Oh, poor Bune.’ The memory sent me down the rabbit hole and I discovered (rediscovered, idk at this point) the Goetic Spirit by the name of Bune. 

Bune, for those that are like I was, and are not versed in the what and who of this spirit, Bune is a spirit mentioned in the Lesser Key of Solomon. She is described as appearing as a three headed dragon, with the heads being that of a griffon, a man, and a dog, or as a man, or as a woman. More importantly, Bune is the Lord of the Graveyard and co-opts the spirits of the dead, turning them into demons to do his (or the magician’s) bidding. That part stuck with me right away. Saint Cyprian and Santa Muerte are both in that same sphere of influence. I had recently done a lot of work over Halloween and into the month of November trying to repair what I felt was a relationship with the dead that I had damaged. It seems rational (magico-rational) that this work trying to heal my general relationship with the dead and trying to heal or fix the after-life lives of some close family members, could have attracted Bune to me or lined me up with his sphere of influence.

Bune’s alignment wasn’t the only magically adjacent thing that happened with me this week either. In the US, this is Thanksgiving week, and as such the wife and I packed the kids into the car and made the two and a half hour sojourn to the area where I grew up to have a country meal. We had a grand time, as always, at my brother Mike’s compound, which is situated about five miles from the farm I grew up on. After dinner, for literally the first time since my grandmother died in 2002, I felt comfortable enough to take the wife and kids, as the sun was setting on fields still being picked, the quick hop over the Pecatonica River to the family farm. The house I grew up in is no longer there, replaced by a very nice and functional machine shed by my uncle who now owns and works the land. I saw lights on and some heads bobbing back and forth so I pulled in. The result was a second visit with my uncle whom I hadn’t seen in person since maybe my wedding and meeting two great young cousins of mine, his grandkids. My uncle, almost immediately, had my daughter in the cab of a tractor and within minutes her gleeful five year old self was steering the John Deer front loader out across some empty fields. We stayed and chatted, my boy got absolutely covered in dirt, it was super. I think that my ancestor work had a lot to do with this. The house up the hill, no dark and uninhabited for years, is where I am convinced my grandparents still are. The chances that my uncle and his grandkids would be working on Thanksgiving is actually pretty good and if you are from a farm community you know this is fact, but what placed them there, in that shed, right by the road I was just sight seeing on? I’m going to say that’s evidence of the spirit world at work. 

We actually talked about building bridges between the living (and aging) members of the family quite a bit and I came away from the visit with a part of my heart lit that had been dark for quite awhile. I’m taking away from that experience that it is just as important to connect with family (real, inherited, or chosen) as it is with ancestors tooling about the after-life. I am thinking now, after that visit, that those two pieces of work — the healing of connections with family in this life and connecting with ancestors in the afterlife — are two sides of the same coin.

There has also been a lot of talk in my cohort revolving around American Indians and Mound Builders and generally the localized pre-historical ghost forest of the Americas. I have some experience with the local American Indian community in Milwaukee, and wanted to say a bit about how to make connections to these spirits. If you are magically operant or adjacent and you, admirably, seek to make contact with, appease, or otherwise engage with the spirits-of-place in your area that are the in-the-real ancestors of American Indians walking around today, I want to encourage you to follow the same model I have found to work with my family (on both sides of the veil). If you are seeking out abandoned Indian Mounds, leaving water or tobacco or squash or other offerings, make an effort to flip that coin over and also reach out to the living American Indian community in your area. Volunteer at a Native American church, attend some Pow Wows, find some craft fairs, buy some gas, chips, and venison at a reservation gas station. Don’t just work with the dead, but make connections to their family in-the-real as well. I think you’ll find that your work on both sides of the veil will be that much more rewarding.

IMBRICATIONS 

This week’s imbrications are all fairly straight-forward magical intersections with our Lovecraft tale and my own magical adjacencies. The first was pointed out to me on the Rune Soup Premium Member forums when I asked an open question about resources for working with Bune. I really learned to appreciate both community and extended friends and family in a much deeper way this week, which is pretty much a sea-change as I’m a inveterate introvert. The first resource I was pointed to was this really insightful reading and interpretation of Bune from Alkistis Dimech of Scarlet Imprint.

  Now I wouldn’t say I am 100% aligned with this interpretation, I think it might go a bit too far across the occult correspondence table for my liking (the reason I don’t want to go that direction, btw, is because that was all the magic I used to manage, charts and correspondence and no real practice, this is nothing against Alkistis fine essay). What did pop out, however, was her alignment of Bune with the sea (her representative in my dream was a dead sailor) and especially where she goes into how Bune uses terror as an initiation. The fact that I had never heard this essay prior to my dream and all the elements that lined up between them had a profound effect on me.

The second imbrication comes from Trey Spruance of Secret Chiefs 3 (and formerly the lead guitar for the late great Mr. Bungle). He recently collaborated with the Kronos Quartet and I’ve shared the Soundcloud file below. I consider this an imbrication due to my long standing fanboydom of Secret Chiefs 3. They were probably one of the first musical manifestations of the magical aesthetic that I was introduced to. Normally, Trey brings a real Djinn / Sumerian feel to his work (accompanied by Hellbilly Surfrock and other [read: pretty much all] musical genres) but this composition crosses over into a ceremonial magic adjacency, with the second movement being a type of invocation of Baphomet. Check it out below.

Our third and final imbrication is, at the very least, something every magically adjacent individual needs to see. It is Dr. Dean Radin’s latest presentation on the study of magic and its alignment with the past 150 years of psi-research. Lovecraft was, and especially in the tale we are going to examine, one of the first to make the ancient alien / occult / ceremonial magic / cutting edge tech connections in his weird fiction. Watch this one through to the end. You can thank me later.

COSMIC WORD-PICTURES

This week’s Lovecraft tale is Beyond the Wall of Sleep. An early layering of technology and ultra-dimensional occult entities by Lovecraft. The protagonist is one Joe Slater, a denizen of the back country, a citizen of a loose cohort of neighbors and kin. To reiterate the quote from the beginning of the post, the unnamed narrator of the tale states:

“I have frequently wondered if the majority of mankind every pause to reflect upon the occasionally titanic significance of dreams, and of the obscure world to which they belong.”

At this point it is clear that this entire post was set in motion and revolves around the significance of dreams, dreams of my grandmother that resulted in my necromantic power-ups and now, possibly, that power-up and my chattering at two other necromantic folk heroes has put the Goetic spirit Bune on my scent. Beyond the Wall of Sleep, among other things, is a tale of journeying. It is described by Lovecraft, the first instance that sent the good Ol’ Boy Joe Slater down the mountain and into the hands of the local sanitarium:

“One day near noon, after a profound sleep begun in a whiskey debauch… the man had roused himself most suddenly… rushing out into the snow, he had flung his arms aloft and commenced a series of leaps directly upward in the air; the while shouting his determination to reach some ‘big, big cabin with brightness in the roof and walls and floor, and the loud queer music far away.”

his is a curious excerpt that makes me think of how, when journeying, we are given more than we can understand and that our minds, as is the theme in Lovecraft, often interpret, redefine, or rephrase what we are given in a journey. We have incredible magical potential as humans but are limited by our materialist conditioning, by our culture, and our religion. I think is true for Lovecraft's 'rustics' as well as the educated, encultured, or seasoned magician. 

There is also described a spirit entity antagonist, named only as 'The Thing That Shines and Shakes and Laughs'.

We will come back to her.

Pulling a bit harder on the journeying silver cord, we find this short description of the world that Slater visits in his dreams:

“great edifices of light, oceans of space, strange music, and shadowy mountains and valleys”

 I quite like this as this simple sentence could be used to focus and begin a journeying session on, offering us some very usable Lovecraftian magical tech. 

As one would expect in an analysis of Lovecraft, there are multiple layers of meaning here, it isn’t just a tale about journeying. Take for instance the below sentence:

“The alienists soon agreed that abnormal dreams were the foundation of the trouble; dreams whose vividness could for a time completely dominate the waking mind of this basically inferior man.”

Unpacking this sentence we see several things, that Lovecraft is writing not from a place of superiority, for he writes the alienists as essentially clueless when it comes to the true nature of the man's visions. He is also reapplying the trope that those of 'rustic' mind, the others, those not part of civilized society, are in fact the ones that are in touch with universal consciousness.

And then we are given a glimpse of some more of Lovecraft’s particular brand of Steampunk technology, along with some fairly intuitive theorizing on the nature of thought and mind:

“It had long been my belief that human thought consists basically of atomic or molecular motion, convertible into ether waves of radiant energy like heat, light, and electricity. This belief had early led me to contemplate the possibility of telepathy of mental communication by means of suitable apparatus, and I had in my college days prepared a set of transmitting and receiving instruments somewhat similar to the cumbrous devices employed in wireless telegraphy at that crude, pre-radio period. These I had tested with a fellow student; but achieving no result had soon packed them away with other scientific odds and ends…”

There is a solid imbrication here with the movie, City of Lost Children, as the dream reading apparatus described in ‘Beyond’ and shown to us in CoLC are one and the same.

We are also given a specific date, the 21st of February. This is the day that the human counterpart of Joe Slater meets his end and contact is made with an extra-dimensional being. February 21st, The Feast Day of Joe Slater, should be observed through practicing some form of journeying and a celebration of the folk wisdom of the Appalachia or similar areas in other parts of the world. Those places you have to pass a sign that states something along the lines of ‘Pavement Ends’ in order to reach.

The day after the Feast Day of Joe Slater, February 22nd, is also mentioned as significant in the end of ‘Beyond’:

“On Febuary 22, 1901, a marvellous new star was discovered by Dr. Anderson, of Edinburgh, not very far from Algol. No star had been visible at that point before. Within twenty-four hours the stranger had become so bright that it outshone Capella. In a week or two it had visibly faded, and in the course of a few months it was hardly discernible with the naked eye.”

This event actually occurred on the 21st as well. The astronomer, Thomas D. Anderson was the first recorded as noticing what is now known as nova GK Persei. This star’s explosion connects this story and our tech to the distant past, the year 367 AD, to be exact. This is the year where what is known as ‘The Great Conspiracy’ took place, setting in motion a year long state of war in Roman controlled Britain that ended their occupation of the island and brought Saxon, Pict, and Caledonian culture to Britain, Scotland, and Ireland. If, on the Feast Day of Joe Slater, you are looking for some more material to fuel your journeying’s magical aesthetic, you can try with the first novel in Stephen R. Lawhead’s Pendragon Cycle, Taliesin, which folds in the fall of Atlantis and the events set in motion by the Great Conspiracy. It is also worth noting that Nova GK Persei, or the Thing That Was Once Joe Slater, was pursued and tormented by The Thing That Shines and Shakes and Laughs. Given the Nova’s location in the sky when it occurred, it can be extrapolated that Joe Slater’s extra-dimensional antagonist is none other than the Demon Star, Algol. If we are to believe (and I do) the work and theories of Peter Mark Adams in the Game of Saturn surrounding this star, the Feast Day of Joe Slater takes on an incredible new complexity in our magical calendar.

The Thing That Shines and Shakes and Laughs is also our archetype when we map this tale to the tarot. Using her reversed form, we find that the Queen of Coins is an excellent map for Lovecraft’s representation of Algol as the Thing that Shines and Shakes and Laughs. Etteilla gave her reversed form the key phrase ‘Mal Certain’. This is a bit difficult for me to translate, as I normally rely on the babelfish to do this and I might have stuck my pink towel a bit too far down my ear canal the last time I showered, as it didn’t spit out anything coherent.

That doesn’t stop a linguist, however, so I broke it into its two components, ‘Bad’ and ‘Certain’. The term ‘bad’ was rare before 1400, when evil was a more common term, which tells us that ‘bad’ is a synonym of evil, or at least it was. It has since lost its potency. ‘Bad’, in the 15th c. context means ‘wicked’, ‘evil’, ‘visions’, and ‘counterfeit’. Joe Slater was, in the end, considered a counterfeit human version of the entity that was forced to dream itself as a human throughout Slater’s young life. If we use this same logic, Algol has or did have a human form somewhere on the planet, I’d like to think of Algol as a Victorian era woman who nightly dreamt of being one of the most powerful interstellar demons in the sky. 

The term ‘Certain’, from the same period means ‘determined’, ‘fixed’, and ‘settled’. In Old French, it is the past participle of ‘decide’, which maps back to ‘sift’, ‘separate’, or ‘to sieve’. ‘Certain’ is also related to the Greek word ‘krisis’, which means a ‘turning point’, or a ‘judgement’. If we look again at the Great Conspiracy we can see this as a turning point for Britain and British magic, which then saw an influx of the myth, lore, and tech of the barbarous tribes that overran the inheritors of Alexandria.

We can view the Queen of Coins as a representation of ‘A Fixed Evil’, which suits her astronomical manifestation of Algol, the demon star. Her traditional reversed definition  suggests a lack of self-sufficiency, vulnerability, shyness, and barriers to realizing ones potential. I’d like to think that when we apply our Lovecraftian magic to this definition, that The Thing That Shines and Shakes and Laughs is an archetype that can help the magician break through her barriers and realize her full potential as she paints cosmic word-pictures on both sides of veil that separates the real and spirit manifestations of life on our planet and beyond.