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#which is literally horrendous and also terrifying and i might die in the process
eggmeralda · 3 years
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oop just unlocked 2014
#terrible idea#it's a really long story but basically i was massively obsessed with the clash in the first half of that year#and since then it was always seen as the most sacred hyperfixation of my life#so i never wanted to think about bc that era of my life was too good i couldn't even handle it#for the first time since then i am ascending to the clash and it's giving me an existential crisis#god i had such a solid identity in 2014 where did it go#i always split my ages as if they were separate people who i used to know#like deep down i know I'm still my 14yo self and she's still my 18yo and she's still my 3yo self etc. but i can't accept that?#some ages i can accept more than others? but some are almost off limits#''19 was too perfect don't touch it or you'll ruin it'' ''12 was too long ago you're not her anymore and you never will be again''#but 14#oh my god#i haven't had a nostalgia attack for early 2014 since probably late 2014 lol#I've never delved into that year#possibly bc i knew exactly who i was and i was aware of my existence but wasn't really bothered?#by the end of that year i started questioning everything but the start i was just vibing?#and if i think about my 14yo self i have to think about the fact that i am still her#which means i have to acknowledge my own existence#which is literally horrendous and also terrifying and i might die in the process#fuckfuckfuvkfuckfuvkvikvufivuccuvidifjdifisifjsisjdjfbsjfishdufysi#i just wanna go back in time and have a really long chat with my 14yo self and all my past selves#not about anything in particular we just talk about songs we like and who our fav characters are etc.#but they all die every new year to make way for a new age who will be having a completely different existential crisis to the previous one#what the fuck am i talking about#I'm literally still listening to the clash if my 14yo self could see me now she'd probably agree but she's dead rip :/#ramble#sjdbsofbs#sjdbsufhsufudsnndefjfjaai#Kvuajdhcahduyahdcyuz#hell yeah boys i reached 30 tags
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smallfrost · 4 years
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MFSRI: The Burning of Scylla Ramshorn Comprehensive Analysis; Scylla as Ovid’s Phoenix
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A while back I proposed the Burning of Scylla Ramshorn  as a theme for our Sexy Weird Necro (now re-branded, Sassy Sexy Weird Murder Nugget Necro). This was primarily about how she may have been burned in the past, either literally (her family was burned) or figuratively (Porter turned in her dodger parents). This evolved to include the fact that Scylla is literally wreathed in fire throughout the season, with actual flames and with more vague references to burning dancing around her. After having separate posts about this (here and here) in addition to my original theory, I figured I would first make a comprehensive list of all the times Scylla has referenced burning or is surrounded by actual flames throughout the season and then propose several options for what this might mean. Including, how the use of fire imagery combined with “nothing ever really dies” parallels to Ovid’s Metamorphosis and the Phoenix.
This one is a long one but come with me on this ride...
To start, we have all of the times she has used fire for Spree Glamour. (Note: Faux Raelle burning is still Scylla’s motif because she represents someone she cares about and loves, and the flames are reflected in Scylla’s eyes). 
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Then we have Scylla and Raelle in Memorial Hall discussing if the Burning Times are really over, followed directly by a shot with a fireplace in the background and Scylla in the foreground. The same fireplace Porter is standing next to a few seconds later (re: Porter burned Scylla).
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And we have Scylla saying she has been burned before and tends to burn. 
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She also mentions the recent burnings of witches, even as recent as last year while she’s in the dungeon. 
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So, what does this all mean? The strength of this theme for Scylla is ominous. Is it possible foreshadowing of a literal burning? Could be. Perhaps Scylla is terrified that she herself will be burned at the stake since a witch had been burned as recently as last year. She is terrified she will be executed. 
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Perhaps this theme is referencing something that happened in the past, such as witnessing her parents being burned or being betrayed by someone she cared about as previously proposed. The parallels to Greek mythology in MFS have been a favorite topic of discussion amongst the theorist community and at the Research Institute, leading to many posts including analyses done by @captainjeclid​ and @trash-deluxe​. We know that Scylla is a Greek monster. We know that Odysseus, whom Raelle parallels, encounters Scylla on his journey home (after having visited the underworld). Could the Burning of Scylla be referring to her own personal Odyssey through the underworld; her own inferno? Would be quite fitting, seeing that she is a Necro. But I think there is yet another possibility… and that is fire as a form of rebirth; that which has died, transforms into the living - shedding a previous nature for a new one.
After seeing how Scylla and Raelle parallel the Odyssey, I hope to convince you of yet another series of mythological parallels, this time as it relates to balance, resurrection, and life becoming death, over and over again, all while linking Scylla to the phoenix as a symbol of rebirth [through fire].
Ovid’s Metamorphosis is an epic poem thematically contemplating transformation. Here we get stories like that of Narcissus, the man doomed to love himself, and Arachne being transformed into a spider. Over 15 ‘books’, the Roman poet, Ovid weaves his tales and ends on one containing the teachings of Pythagoras. And what do we learn? To quote directly, “All things are always changing, but nothing dies. The spirit comes and goes, is housed wherever it wills, it shifts residence from beasts to men, from men to beasts, but always it keeps on living”. Sound familiar?
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Scylla teaches us the same lesson in the graveyard when she shows Raelle the Death Cap. Death is not so cut and dry. Nothing ever really dies. Life becomes death which becomes life again. Over and over. Scylla is almost quoting Ovid verbatim here, “Nothing remains the same: the great renewer, Nature, makes form from form, and, oh, believe me that nothing ever dies.”
Pythagoras really says nearly these exact words several times. He explains that death is not what it seems and not to fear it, but to understand that our souls are deathless, and that when they leave our bodies, they will find new dwelling places. Things are not static. They are always changing. The soul, the life force, is recycled in a never ending and eternal circle… That which once was, is no longer the same but still present. It is a process of renewal… In other terms, while Necros cannot bring the dead back to life, the cycle of souls shifting residence is itself, a form of resurrection. So, even if Willa Collar is death, her soul is not gone. Just… repurposed. It’s going to be up to our little Necro to find it.  
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Aside: I just want to point out that this portion of Metamorphosis is riddled with examples of duality (day and night, fire and water, life and death), one of our favorite themes throughout MFS. And the never ending, harmonious cycle of renewal fits perfectly into a magic system built on the foundation of maintaining balance. 
So besides quoting Ovid almost verbatim, giving us our MFS Necro “religion”, why else is this portion of Metamorphoses relevant? Because immediately following discussions on how the life of one creature can come from the death of another, we learn that while “all of these things have their beginning in some other creature, there is one bird which renews itself, out of itself. [They] call it the phoenix.”
Now, Pythagoras does not necessarily say that the phoenix is born out of its own ashes. In fact, the historical association of the phoenix with fire is hard to trace and I had difficulty finding anything related to the exact origin of flames. But the symbolism of the phoenix throughout its mythology associates with the sun and fire. In Egyptian mythology, the phoenix flies to Heliopolis, the “City of the Sun” and builds its nest atop the Temple of the Sun, or brings its remains there after rebirth. In various versions of this myth, the nest catches fire from the rays of the sun. I’m not about to make this a thesis on the origins of fire being associated with the phoenix, but for now, let’s fall back on our western mythology of being reborn in flames and connect them to the theme of “nothing ever dies” in Ovid’s Metamorphosis. Indeed, Pythagoras discusses fire several times throughout Book 15 and how fire itself is part of these changing cycles. Including one instance where he literally states that “[They] set wood on fire by pouring water on it in the dark of the moon.” Considering @theycallmestephlee​ established that Scylla is Fire and Raelle is Water … the parallels are hard to ignore. 
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The Phoenix from the Aberdeen Bestiary could lead us down another rabbit hole of parallels with Christianity and Lesbian Jesus Christ, Raelle Collar as @likethefoximalwayschanging​ has established. 
Ovid’s use of fire imagery throughout this portion of the poem, and the eventual association of the Phoenix with fire as a form of rebirth that is rooted in western legend, strongly suggests that Scylla is going through her own transformation by being wreathed in flames. She has lived her life by one set of values up until now, but her current nature is dying. Through that death, she will be renewed with a new moral compass. Scylla is questioning the foundations of her morality. She still believes that the Army is evil but knows that what the Spree asked her to do was equally horrendous (she has regret, she did not hand over Raelle). She has been through fire and brimstone, her own inferno. Her motivations were driven by that. She committed horrible acts. But now we’ve seen her begin strip away her old nature. Because Raelle, like water, found the cracks and flowed her way into Scylla’s fiery heart.
So even if there is a literal Burning of Scylla Ramshorn, she won’t die. She will be saved and “reborn” in a new light with a new nature. She has been scorched by fire in her past; what she has been through has led her to commit things which she regrets. There used to be no room for attachments, for love. But through her journey and through meeting and loving Raelle, her perspectives have changed. “That which has been, is not; that which was not, begins to be…”
Quotes from Rolfe Humphries’ translation of Metamorphoses.
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chocobutt-trash · 7 years
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I got tagged by @valkyrieofardyn, wheee~
Rules: tell me your favorite characters from fictional works (movies, books, tv, video games, etc.) and tag 10 people!
(This list is not ordered)
1.) Prompto Argentum (FFXV): He’s one of the realest, most fully-fleshed out characters I’ve seen in a videogame in a long time. His struggles are totally relatable to mine, which is why I like him so much. If someone with such similar hangups to me can do such great things, I can’t help but admire that and he gives me hope. He honestly tries his best, keeps his kindness and optimism despite being horrendously treated, and also has killer style. Fucking love him.
2.) Melfice (Grandia 2): He’s been my favourite character since I was fourteen. His Blood Brothers-style story arc with main character Ryudo had me completely sold. Such angst! Such sadness behind that evil persona he gained from being cursed by Valmar. And uh, such a goddamn sexy voice. My god. And with that big ol’ horn on his head, I totally will be blaming Melfice forever for my love of the D.
3.) Tails (Sonic the Hedgehog): For similar reasons to Prompto. Tails is just a little ray of sunshine, always does his best and puts others before himself, even though, with his insane mechanic skills and empathy, he should really be the MVP of the entire Sonic franchise. He doesn’t get nearly enough credit, but he’s not the sort to complain about it. As long as his friends are okay, as long as Robotnik is stopped, he’s happy. I just want to give him all the nice things.
4.) Allan Karlsson (The Hundred Year Old Man Who Climbed Out The Window And Disappeared): God, this book is the best. Allan Karlsson is, as the title says, a hundred-year-old-man who, on his centenary birthday, decides to climb out the window of his nursing home and go on an adventure. He’s characterised brilliantly, and throughout the bizarre adventure you end up finding out a lot about the escapades of his entire life. He’s SUCH a cool person. The coolest. If I could be such a lackadaisical and awesome old man I could die happy.
5.) Fujimoto (Ponyo): I’m a geology major and Fujimoto lives on a volcanic guyot under the sea alongside trilobites and other extinct creatures from the Cambrian era, so what’s not to like? But seriously, I love his backstory, there’s a lot of isolation and sadness and frustration there. Leaving humans behind to chase the call of the sea, hating what people are doing to the planet, falling in love with a goddess of the ocean. And damn if he doesn’t have the prettiest hair in the entire world.
6.) Ardyn Izunia (FFXV): One of the best-written villains in anything ever. I mean, Melfice will always be my fave for nostalgia reasons, but Ardyn is so fantastically characterised. His voice, his mannerisms, his motivation. He’s one of few characters I genuinely hate, and the backstory is so fucking tragic. He certainly knows how to hold a grudge, and I love that he’s a total morally ambiguous Judas/Jesus analogue. Like, how much of what he does is just playing the Devil’s Advocate to facilitate the end of the Starscourge, and how much of it is just the pained efforts of an old man who wants to die? God, it hurts thinking about it. And yet I can’t forgive him for hurting so many people. Damn, he’s just so complex and real.
7.) Letty Hempstock (The Ocean at the End of the Lane): From my favourite Neil Gaiman book. Like Ardyn, Letty is also an old, old soul, (in fact, Ardyn has nothing on her) but she is bright and optimistic and still exploring her power. She is mythologically tied into the real world in a way I’ve never seen before in fiction, a very, if I may say, geological way. And I simply love it. She’s got her own motivations and plans, but she’s ultimately a helpful and totally engaging, sparky character. I would feel like the Earth stood a chance if she was real.
8.) Gaara (Naruto): An old favourite from my weebiest days. I loved this character so much I cosplayed him excessively, haha. So much angst, so much demonisation, when really he was just a big softie underneath. I just wanted people to be nice to him. Gaara was a classic example of nurture creating the illusion of nature, of child-PTSD, of mental trauma and his eventual healing process over the long arcs of Naruto’s entire run made me so fucking happy. He outgrew his (literal) demons and did great things. Damn inspiring.
9.) Bruce Robertson (Filth): I debated marking Bruce as my top character of all time because, my god, he actually IS the best-written villain ever. Because he’s not entirely a villain, he’s just an ordinary person, your average copper in Edinburgh. A man who you start out almost agreeing with at the beginning of the novel, and wind up down a rabbit hole so deep you wonder how you got there, you start to worry as you read that you might have become this terrible thing - the way he’s written gets you inside his head, makes the lines blur. Bruce is utterly real, utterly believable, and completely, wholly nasty. I wish I had the skills of Irvine Welsh, to achieve a characterisation so great. I hate him but love his character, love every nuance and inflection. For the love of god, read Filth.
10.) Kilgrave (Jessica Jones): God, this man disturbs me, and it’s precisely because he’s so perfectly believable. He’s a man born with mutant powers that make people do his bidding - he’s grown up entirely within a privileged context, never having to worry about obtaining anything. People just do it for him. And as a result his personality is somewhat stunted - a literal manchild. The most terrifying thing is, we have all met someone like Kilgrave in life. He doesn’t fully understand that he’s hurting Jessica. He doesn’t understand she doesn’t love him. And he feels sleighted, hurt by this. Like all good villains, like Ardyn and Melfice and Bruce Robertson above, Kilgrave has aspects of his history and personality that are pitiable, that make me feel sorry for him. But it doesn’t make me hate him any less. God, he’s a bit of a lost cause, but such a great character study.
I tag: @yourscientistfriend, @cuiwi, @sodsta, @thatisludicrous, @shockerrbreakerr, @barcodechocobo, @chocoomba, @prettyprompto, @catbuttermargerine
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