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vaguely-concerned · 3 years

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The Mandalorian Chapter 15 rewatch thoughts

- mayfeld does hear when the droid talks to him the first time, you can see him pretending not to like he hopes he’ll just go away haha. I also guess he’s had a lot of time to think, picking apart pieces of the large fascist machine he used to be a part of and going over everything he clearly regrets

- hahaha fennec and boba are in the back intensely keeping watch the entire time they’re on the prison planet. I suppose a good two thirds of this crew is uuuuh extremely wanted by the new republic lol

- the thing din’s voice does at the end when he says “but you still know your imperial clearances and protocols. don’t you.” is beyond fucking words, it sends a chill right through me

1) din fiddling with that panel; I think he’s phenomenally nervous behind the helmet here, that’s the sort of keeping his hands busy he does when he’s anxious and 2) why the hell does boba have this many chairs instead of like space for cargo haha does he throw bounty hunter parties in here or what

- ngl boba correctly guessing at a glance what sort of ore they’re mining and informing everyone in his sardonic deadpan voice is Big Sexy

I love how he and fennec are standing together when they’re both present in these opening scenes too, first at the very back when they’re keeping a lookout:

and then in the foreground while they discuss the scan

it’s a nice subtle way to get across that they already have a dynamic, they’re somewhat used to working together as a unit at this point. (she’s also looking over at him when she asks what they might be mining in there, like she’s mostly asking his opinion instead of opening it to the floor. they’re talking the mission out between them before din enters the conversation)

- the inside of slave 1 when the ship’s moving makes me a little bit motion sick, I really love seeing it but I hope we don’t stay in here too often haha

- aaaw the small weary sigh din gives upon realizing none of his bros can go with mayfeld. I’m sorry about basically your entire life buddy

the awkward way din adjusts the helmet like he’s trying to get used to the way it feels ;______;

- ah the distinct implication that mayfeld is needling din about this because he’s actually feeling super uncomfortable being back in empire gear and he needs to transfer that discomfort over onto someone else so he won’t have to feel through it... very psychologically understandable and such a fucking piece of shit asshole character trait to give in to haha

- din’s level of side eye is so epic you can see it straight through the helmet fhaskjfhd

- neat detail: din’s head turns slightly toward mayfeld when he calls mandalorians a ‘race’. (it’s sort of cool that we as the audience know why that bothers him, but mayfeld probably didn’t even pick up on it). also shows that mayfeld doesn’t actually quite understand what he’s talking about, even when he makes decent points he’s caught up in his own myopic nihilistic point of view. ‘we’re all the same’ ------> ‘everyone’s secretly as shitty as me deep down’. (which also betrays a lot of self loathing, since we see later he does have the capacity to NOT be that shitty when he chooses to. rick famuyiwa manages to get a LOT of really interesting nuanced stuff into this character in two short episodes, that’s super impressive)

the bright sunny look on mayfeld’s face when din finally gives in and takes the bait tho fsajdkfhasj he’s awful but that’s very funny

- rip all these excellent dudes who really only wanted to accomplish the noble goal of ruining the empire’s entire day and didn’t know they were also trying to blow up My Dad Who Does Not Deserve Any Of This, it’s honestly just really sad that there’s no moment to talk that out

well at least they blew up the entire refinery on their way out, I’m sure that’s the way they would have wanted their memories honored lol

- the comedy beat of din running out of ammo for the first time ever and the music briefly cutting out for it is so so good for me

hahahaha din seems to actually take a moment to be a little aghast at that dude who ends up crushed under the treads of the tank thing, he’s just sort of staring for a few seconds too long and that’s how pirate nr 2 takes him by surprise and shatters his shoulder armour

- I feel a bit bad -- two of the ‘pirates’ try to hold on to each other for balance and then din punches them apart and off the tank :( I mean it’s not like he could just let them murderate him either but like. ouch I’m guessing this one might haunt him for a while for several reasons huh

(the sequence is actually this guy, let’s call him pirate 3, swings the spear at din and misses, instead hitting his buddy who’s trying to get to his feet, then looks horrified and grabs for him to make sure he doesn’t fall off, and then... mando’s forehead happens to them haha)

- poor fennec and cara just running up that hill while everything’s on fire, they must be wondering what the FUCK is going on (at least cara knows that things blowing up is a sure sign din djarin is in the middle there somewhere)

- everything about carano in real life aside for one second -- I do like that we get this contrast in build between our main female characters of the episode and the way their costume designs enhance it

- awwww the little gesture din does with his hand after he removes it from mayfeld’s chest after stopping him from leaving, it’s just so... sweet. it’s a little bit appeal, a little bit reassurance, it just lightens/softens the tone of what he says a bit (he has quite a lot of like... not conciliatory mannerisms exactly, but small touches here and there that are there to communicate that he’s not angry/aggressive or trying to be a dick about it even when he’s emphatic. I keep wondering how much that is just him being him and how much is him being practiced at settling other people’s hot tempers)

- this shot is just... genius

it’s din seen entirely from the outside, with nothing of what we’ve learned to recognize as him for almost two seasons now in view -- not even his face, which we have at least a tenuous fledgling attachment to from before. it’s like we get introduced to him almost as if anew again and again in this episode, just like he’s getting introduced to new aspects of himself and what he’s willing to do and having to struggle to find ways to have that fit with who he is. his discomfort and stress is our discomfort and stress. it’s so interesting

- I can’t stop cackling at this moment even in all the tension -- you only get a sliver of din’s profile but you can feel the sheer MURDER radiating off him sdhfasjk

- aaaaaaaagh the way you get a whole different view of din’s habitual impassiveness when you can actually see his face... the way he keeps appealing to mayfeld ‘just don’t make more trouble, just shut up’, the way he goes completely silent and watchful and frozen..... those are all really obvious trauma responses, and it leads you to wonder how often he touches into that even when he’s in his element, when he’s got the full armour on. hmngh my heart

- ‘the believer’ is such a galaxy brain title for this episode, because it could be referring to either of the three men around this table or all of them at once. (and crucially the only person whose beliefs aren’t in a living, breathing state of adapting to the world around them is the empire officer, with his horrific inhuman ideology. mayfeld thinks he believes in nothing, and proves himself explosively wrong by the end of the episode, and it’s redeeming for him in some capacity. din is facing a more internal dilemma of different parts of his (and his culture’s) beliefs/values clashing and having to decide which one’s more important, to his identity and to how to exist in the world as a person (and love for the baby wins out supremely in the end. of course it does Y_____Y). the empire dude only sees the same sterile fascist world at the end of his shit rainbow that he’s clearly always done, even when faced with proof that it’s untenable. (I mean he wouldn’t give a fuck that it’s immoral because he’s y’know evil, but he’s not even fazed by the fact that the empire provably FAILED, and failed so quickly) his belief is a dead and deadening thing to contrast the others. man when this show goes off with the themes it goes OFF haha)

- love the triumphant heroic mando music kicking in as we’re finally getting to pick off imps, love that for us

- din’s protective instincts at work again, he helps mayfeld to his feet and makes sure he’s safely on board before going further in himself ;_______;

- fennec’s professional approval at mayfeld’s shot hahaha. well I guess he was supposed to be a sharpshooter back in the day huh

I do Not think she likes mayfeld even after all that, though, the withering look she sends him on her way past... should have killed him stone dead on the spot

- seeing din back in the armour is like a physical relief, I can breathe again haha

- tfw you catch yourself thinking ‘at least when all this is over we can go back to the razor crest and everything will be normal again’ and then you rEMEMBER 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

#star wars #the mandalorian #the mandalorian spoilers #the mandalorian meta #honestly I could add a lot more of my boba thirst in this lol (idk din is always Dad not Daddy to me but boba's Doing something for me haha)

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m-y-fandoms · 3 years

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1 Thing I Love & 1 Thing I Hate About EVERY Danganronpa Character Part 1

Part 2

SPOILERS FOR ALL THREE MAIN GAMES

I’d love to hear our opinions as well in the comments or my inbox or DM’s! If you try this trend with DR characters, tag me!

Sayaka Maizono

♡ Her passion for her career and friends.

✘ The way she tries to screw over Makoto when the game had just begun. Like wait and see what happens before screwing over such a great guy? Leon didn’t deserve it either.

Leon Kuwata

♡ His voice actor (English), and how real and human his execution was in that we all would be so scared and irrational. It was just so iconic and sad as it’s our first introduction to the death in this series and we all think: “shit, this is real... they are really killing these kids.” I didn’t think it would be that brutal, just seeing his body limp at the end with the haunting music.

✘ His design is disgusting. I hate how he looks.

Chihiro Fujisaki

♡ So innocent, so kind, so intelligent

✘ Shouldn’t have been killed for such a stupid reason, also they did Mondo dirty with that motive for killing as well. Just a mess. As for the actual character, Chihiro cries right off the bat when you do your introductions and that was kind of annoying to me personally.

Mondo Oowada

♡ He has a lot of respect, understanding and emotions for someone I thought would be a hard-ass douche biker.

✘ The worst motive to kill ever in a game where you know you’re getting executed if you’re found out. Like you’d be extra careful and that’s his reason to kill? Lazy writing.

Celestia Ludenberg

♡ Bad bitch energy and her goth lolita design.

✘ Manipulation and double murder. Bad bitch energy only goes so far. Confidence is different then selfishness. Also, of all the chapter 3 triple murders... the worst motive to kill.

Kiyotaka Ishimaru

♡ Emotions: secure in his masculinity, able to cry, show emotions, and apologize when he’s wrong. He’s funny and likable.

✘ The Ishimondo white hair thing was stupid. Taka was fine on his own.

Hifumi Yamada

♡ Writing takes talent, fan fiction as much as any other style or genre. Also the talent of his voice actor (who also voices Kiibo/K1-B0).

✘ Literally everything else about him.

Sakura Oogami

♡ I love everything about her. I love her wisdom, loyalty, design, voice etc. Just step on me, mother.

✘ Why the hell would she ever agree to be a spy even if it meant the end of her dojo? I just don’t think she would do that rationally because she isn’t selfish. The others would suffer for her spying. She remedies this with redemption in her letter in chapter 4 but still she should’ve said no off the bat. Everyone had something to lose. The dojo wasn’t worth spying for monokuma. Also I just don’t think she would commit suicide. She can’t help the remaining students survive and redeem herself truly if she’s dead.

Kyoko Kirigiri

♡ Bad bitch energy, calm and collected when I could never be.

✘ Especially in future arc of the anime, damn can you show some emotion please? Through your words and expressions not just your actions. Sure she was willing to “die” for Makoto but like I just want more emotion from her sometimes, even in THH.

Makoto Naegi

♡ So pure. I Love Bryce Papenbrook. Makoto reminds me of Sora and I love his design.

✘ In THH I didn’t mind his innocence but in the Danganronpa 3 future arc anime, when people started straight up abusing him and accusing him, he needed to grow a little backbone.

Byakuya Togami

♡ Love my dad, king shit, also love how over the progression of the games and animes he becomes a little more kind to his friends.

✘ Why the fuck did he mess with Chihiro’s body? Just so cruel and disrespectful.

Yasuhiro Hagakure

♡ Funny magic man. Sexy voice.

✘ Please. Please Hiro use your brain just once. Why do we have to prove Kyoko isn’t a ghost?!

Toko Fukawa

♡ Character development in UDG and I love Genocider.

✘ Putting down herself and others constantly gets old in THH.

Aoi Asahina

♡ Love her voice actress and her personality

✘ We really just gonna get everyone killed in chapter 4 huh? Surely you know they don’t all deserve that.

Junko Enoshima

♡ A very memorable villain with great hair and design.

✘ I just can’t stand her. I hate her so much.

Mukuro Ikusaba

♡ Her mercenary background is super cool as a concept.

✘ Too bad it wasn’t explored nearly enough.

Hajime Hinata

♡ Seeing the protagonist be a little less naive, innocent and positive than Makoto was a refreshing change, although I loved Makoto. I liked Hajime’s cynicism and expressions that sometimes just screamed “this shit again, huh?”

✘ I enjoy the way Izuru looks but I hate him as a character. He is sexy to look at but Hajime is just a better character overall

Teruteru Hanamura

♡ His love for his family and mother especially is so cute and heart breaking if you know the full story.

✘ He needs to know when to dial it back and quit with the perversions. And no it’s not just how he looks, Miu needs to chill at times, too.

Twogami

♡ I feel like he genuinely cares about his friends, just hides it well

✘ His death felt like a cop out and poorly written. It just didn’t sit right with me. Also his design is disgusting to me, his outfit and such.

Mahiru Koizumi

♡ Loyal to her close friends.

✘ I just have no interest in her as a character and I find her boring.

Peko Pekoyama

♡ Loyalty. Loyalty is something I value very highly in every form of relationship. Peko is also very hot.

✘ Come on girl... I know how you were raised but you should’ve known Fuyuhiko didn’t think of you as just a tool and you two should’ve expressed your true feelings long ago. Like even in secret. How do you live like this? Also I feel like killing Mahiru could’ve been avoided with a calm talk.

Ibuki Mioda

♡ Cute design, positive vibes.

✘ Cringe sometimes in the way she talks.

Hiyoko Saionji

♡ Beautiful character design and some very good insults and snarky remarks at times.

✘ Just irredeemably mean and annoying. Even when you do her free time events she is just so annoying.

Mikan Tsumiki

♡ I like her design as well as her hair, expressions, sprites and clothing.

✘ I hate her. I just hate her whether she’s in her true psycho form or timid stuttering form. She’s just annoying in my opinion.

Nekomaru Nidai

♡ So supportive, can hold my drink at a party. Respects everyone and wants the best for them.

✘ Bro Mechamaru was a stupid plot point. I just couldn’t stand looking at him and couldn’t take it seriously. Still sad when he died though.

Chiaki Nanami

♡ From chapter 5 of sdr2 on she is impossible not to love if you didn’t already. Just the selflessness, the sadness of the reveal and execution, how she returns to help Hajime at the end???? I love her. I love her hair design, color palette, her personality, everything.

✘ I’m bitter and miserable about her being the only class member to actually die (the despair arc anime) also her falling asleep at random times is kind of odd and she doesn’t seem to be like that later on in the game??? Like it seemed like a cheap joke but not actually who she is? Hard for me to explain.

Gundham Tanaka

♡ King shit, couldn’t praise him enough. He’s sexy, loves animals, and is funny as hell sometimes. His voice actor is a saint and a cool dude and I named my guinea pigs after the Dark Devas (yes I know they are hamsters in the games.)

✘ Come on dude. I get that being from Hell and magic and having evil powers is your shtick, but we all know that you and Nekomaru sacrificed yourselves so the others wouldn’t starve. We know you care about your classmates. There comes a time when it’s time to let personas and facades fade and be true to your heart. I just feel like him denying he cared at the end hurt. We all know he cared. I didn’t like how he was haughty until the end. He deserved better. I love him.

Nagito Komaeda

♡ I love him so much. So cunning and intelligent, always a step ahead. And he’s big sexy.

✘ Him killing himself in chapter 5 hurt me so bad I was like in denial for days. Also hate how Bryce Papenbrook gives him a raspy stoner psycho voice in the game then a light airy higher-pitched voice in the despair arc anime. It just bothers me. I love his voice still but the inconsistency just hurts my OCD

Sonia Nevermind

♡ I love that she’s so interested in her passions and love her feelings for Gundham

✘ Her outfit and bow are atrocious. Also why didn’t she start liking and talking to Gundham sooner on? Their romance bloomed late and it would’ve made for a better chapter 4 ending if they were a bit closer.

Kazuichi Souda

♡ Cool design and outfit, love his voice (also voices Kaito in V3) and his backstory is relatable at times. He’s also very human in that he’s scared a lot of the time or insecure or blames others in panicked situations. It’s not always a good thing but it’s human and realistic.

✘ Gosh he can be so annoying. Sometimes flirting or whining too much is well... too much.

Akane Owari

♡ Strong-willed and definitely someone I would be friends with

✘ What the hell is her outfit? Gymnasts and athletes don’t wear that shit. Stop objectifying her when it doesn’t even make the product or plot better. Like there’s absolutely no point to making her dress that way. I was a gymnast for 15 years. Even those who do parkour (which Akane seems to do more often than actual gymnastics in the anime and game) don’t wear what she wears. Also she’s underrated.

Fuyuhiko Kuzuryuu

♡ I love him. He’s the DR character I’m most like out of all the games and anime. Tenko is a close second. I think he’s adorable, love his character arc, development, redemption, and love his voice.

✘ In the anime/despair arc, Fuyuhiko is not done justice. He doesn’t get enough lines, has a different voice actor, just doesn’t give off the same vibes.

Izuru Kamakura

♡ Sexy man long hair good.

✘ Boring character. I wish he were just Hajime.

Kaede Akamatsu

♡ Loyalty and leadership are such attractive qualities in her. Also she faced her death with such class and dignity and I respect her because I could never.

✘ Some of the voice lines Erika does for her are just weird and cringe. Just random moans or grunts... I don’t know it’s like when Ann Takamaki from Persona 5 (also voiced by Erika) makes suggestive noises as well. Just grinds my gears. Also hate her outfit down to the hair pins.

Shuichi Saihara

♡ I love his nasally voice. I love his design and he’s so adorable. I love how emotional and compassionate he can be. He ties with Makoto for favorite protag of mine.

✘ That sprite where he sniffs his hand. And his ugly ass hat.

Rantarou Amami

♡ Sexy man, sexy voice, sexy piercings

✘ Ugly outfit, and wasted potential

Ryoma Hoshi

♡ I respect him and feel bad for his outlook on life and for how poorly he views himself. I love his little hat as well and he’s the first “different styled” character (Hifumi, Bandai, Teruteru) that I liked the design of.

✘ I hate when he says “got a long ways to go,” it’s overused and annoying, and wish he gave himself more credit. Also hate that when you first meet him he warns you that he’s killed people and is dangerous to be around. Come on buddy, you know you wouldn’t hurt your friends. Stop pushing them away.

Kirumi Tojo

♡ Competence, well rounded, skillful

✘ Boring as hell. I wouldn’t waste one free time event on her.

Angie Yonaga

♡ Dark skin, super cute, love her talent as an artist myself.

✘ Gives religious people a bad name and is super manipulative which I hate.

Tenko Chabashira

♡ I relate to her and feel bad when she’s misunderstood. She’s a good person deep down. Also love her sprites.

✘ There’s more cunning, funny and clever ways to write her digs at men.

Korekiyo Shunguuji

♡ I’m in love with this man. Long hair, voice, mystery, mask, intelligence, passion, talent.

✘ He definitely was a victim of abuse and a lot of people refuse to see that and just hate him. Team Danganronpa should’ve given him a redemption arc where he realized his sister abused him and changed.

Gonta Gokuhara

♡ I love his design except for his suit. Also he’s so cute and naive. I cried for his trail.

✘ No need talk like caveman. Better way to do this.

Kokichi Ouma

♡ Like Nagito, I value his intelligence and crazy cunning.

✘ Shouldn't have died. Also shouldn’t have manipulated Gonta. That was just cruel.

Miu Iruma

♡ She has her hilarious moments and her death surprised me and was sad.

✘ Sometimes she lacks basic empathy, i.e. calling Tenko “Tencrotch” when she just fucking died.

Maki Harukawa

♡ Amazing character development. Didn’t see her surviving until the end at the start. Also her love and passion for Kaito.

✘ “Do you wanna die?” gets old.

Kaito Momota

♡ Just the overall best bro you could ever have.

✘ Has some toxic masculinity issues and anger issues.

K1-B0

♡ Pretty much everything about him. His design, his attitude and personality, especially how amazing and cool he is chapter 5 onward, his execution made me so sad. He’s so innocent and funny without trying.

✘ When you do his free time events he’s very arrogant and just talks about himself a lot... it seems odd and not similar to the Kiibo we see throughout the game.

Himiko Yumeno

♡ Super cute design, love her voice and “Nyeh...” and her sprites. Her character development is great as well.

✘ Why did they take so long to make her important and likable?

Tsumugi Shirogane

♡ An excellent and well hidden reveal

✘ I hate her. So annoying, from the voice to the references and her personality.

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bellamioneotp · 4 years

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Bellamione Fic Master List

Making a list of Bellamione fics to guide the poor innocent souls into temptation organize stories based on AU type.

DARK AU’s

Bellatrix isn’t a bright ball of sunshine, but rather than have a story where she becomes a better person, Hermione becomes like her, or even joins her side. This AU type isn’t limited to only that, but also to general dark themes in the story such as violence, war and ‘wtf this is so wrong but yet I can’t stop reading’.

Reign Down Like wow. A whole world built around what if Voldemort survived and used Hermione in his evil schemes and had Bellatrix engaged to her. Very detailed and the author doesn’t hold back on aspects of the new world that can be somewhat unsettling. 25/10 this will leave you wondering just how sexy dark magic can truly feel.

The Dark Corners of the Earth This one is dark in an entirely different sense. Bellatrix and Snape are pitted in an ancient war against one another and Hermione is caught in the middle. The romance moves a bit too fast paced for me but the lore and detail in this will have you really thinking this story over the next few days, trying to figure out just wtf is going on. 45/10 will have you hoping your nightlight can keep Cthulhu away.

Haunted This story won’t leave you haunted, but it is pretty good even with it’s short chapters and all. It tells the story of Hermione sort of losing her marbles but I won’t get into too much detail. Just read it for yourself; it’s a quick easy read. 10/10 is poetic as fuck.

I Dream of Sin Takes place in a sort of canon world in which Hermione is an American teen being bullied. You can imagine how well that goes for the bullies especially when she learns she has magic and is taught by Bellatrix herself on how to use it. It gets progressively darker each chapter. 16/10 don’t want to mess with magical nerds ever.

For whom the Bell Tolls is an interesting look into how Hermione’s actually a death eater and Bellatrix is not. While Hermione is not bat shit insane, she is a murderer and Bellatrix is the sane one. Nice to see things switched up. This story is not necessarily as dark as the others but it gets brownie points for making the usually good Hermione evil right off the bat. 9/10 come to the dark side, we have cookies.

Staring at Nothing is just...wow. A very powerful one shot about Hermione’s descent into darkness as told by Harry’s perspective. 10/10 for who needs friends anyways, when you’ve got black leather.

Visions of You in which Hermione is a depressed youth after the war and has to deal with hallucinations of Bellatrix. Hermione isn’t dark here so much as she is gray type, and the story has a permeating tinge of sadness to it, given the circumstances. 8/10 for maybe Bellatrix isn’t a hallucination?

Deep Below what’s more awful than being accused of Harry’s death? Being falsely accused of it, and having to deal with trying to prove your innocent. This is a situation Hermione ends up in. But will she get out of it? 8/10 for this gets deep.

How to Love Bellatrix captures Hermione and sort of indoctrinates her into the world of darkness. Hermione is mad at first, but then she realizes how sexy Bellatrix is and is like, ‘alright fam, sign me up’ and boom Bellamione. 8/10 you love this story but not it’s update schedule.

TIME TRAVELER AU’s

Basically, what it says on the tin. Someway or another, Hermione goes back into time to stop Bellatrix from ever becoming evil. Drama and romance ensue.

Future Shocks A good time turner fic with a more modern take on war. It’s pretty long and it is the slowburn of all slowburns. But it’s a very interesting story and the ending will have you definitely shook. 8/10 will shock you awake from that boring lecture you’re reading fanfic in.

Time Heals all Wounds Hermione gets sent back in time to ‘redeem’ Bellatrix but not in the gift card way, more like saving the future type way. They end up, you guessed it, falling in love and changing the future somewhat. 6/10 is a young teen romance that will have you reliving your adventures as a young sapphic witch.

Mirror, Mirror Not exactly a time turner fic, more like a parallel world, I suppose. Hard to explain but has good amounts of mystery and trying to understand what is happening. Focuses more on Bellatrix’s POV which is a nice change of pace. 8/10 will have you looking in the mirror and summoning Bellatrix like she was Bloody Mary.

Let the Light Come and Take me A time turner fic that ends up with Bellatrix time traveling but to the future and the chaos her arrival there causes for those who are acquainted with her devious ways. Looks at the growth of our two ladies relationship into something more. 5/10 if it’s not slowburn romance is it really Bellamione?

The One Within the Other this story is about, you guessed it, time travel! Hermione goes back on purpose to stop Bellatrix from achieving her evil potential and in the process love blossoms. 7/10 for never enough time to read Bellamione in peace!

Caught in the Time series this is a series of three full length stories about Bellamione stuck in different times and universes. So much happens in them it’s kind of hard to summarize so the best thing to do is read them. 8, 8.5, 7/10 I’ll let you figure out which score goes for which series.

Just say When started off as a time turner story but then it ended up becoming something more of an espionage tale. It’s a good read and interesting to see how Bellatrix aims to save Hermione from a dementor’s kiss (spoilers!) in order to save their future together. A good mix of romance and action. 8/10 The name’s Black. Bellatrix, Black.

The Broken Wand It all starts with a wand and then before you know it, boom, time travel happens. Featuring Loki and adventure all around, this fic has interesting plot points to keep you engaged despite the slower update times. 7/10, will break your wand too.

Hourglass basically, a young Bellatrix is brought into the future and consequences abound from that mishap. The plot is a bit wonky and there are some logic mistakes, but if you can get over it, it’s a decent time travel story. 5/10 for it must be canon that Bellatrix has a lovely hourglass figure.

Times they are a Changing where Bellatrix travels back in time to save her wife, Hermione. Nice to see a story where Hermione isn’t the one doing all the saving. Unfortunately there’s only six chapters to this story and it’s unlikely it’ll ever get finished but it’s a nice fresh concept. 6/10 for that’s how many chapters there are.

Destined in this one, Hermione experiences some wonky times after the battle at the department of mysteries. Hermione has to find a way back home, but perhaps she might find love along the way? 10/10 for this is destined to be an interesting read.

HEALER AU’s

Let’s be real, Bellatrix has got a lot of problems and these authors try to solve them, with sex. And you know, medical help. But sex definitely helps a lot.

Portrait of a Tragic Woman Not a typical healer type au, because Hermione is a therapist whose helping Bellatrix with her mental disorders. Focuses a lot on the relationship between the two and really makes you try to figure out what exactly is up with Bellatrix and what is her past, etc. The ending chapters will leave you shooketh and wondering what even is real anymore. 50/10 because it feels like an acid trip, man.

The Healer is only one chapter but still worth a read. Hopefully the author will have some time to get back to it because it has a huge potential. 6/10 because I need some healing.

1k is a one shot, featuring Hermione as a therapist and Bellatrix as her patient. Can’t say too much without spoiling it, but despite it’s short length, the author paints a vivid look into Bellatrix’s mind if she was just an insane muggle. 1k/10 because that’s one patient I would never like to meet.

Darkness Underneath I mean, Hermione runs a team of healers, so technically it’s kinda a healer au fic, right? This story looks more in depth at the Death Eaters and dark magic surrounding them. 9/10 is that a dark mark or are you just happy to see me?

TEACHER AU

We all know this is the holy grail au of this fandom and yet there’s only a couple of long stories for this. Someone, write some more!

Fractures A long fic, that has a sequel. Basically, Bellatrix is Hermione’s teacher during a very trying time for Hermione when a competition goes very wrong and dark truths are revealed. Lot’s of action, Bellamione interactions, and overall interesting plot. 8/10 will leave your heart in fractures when you find out the sequel is unfinished.

In the Dead of Night Hermione asks Bellatrix if she can teach her some.....magic and things end up becoming very magical indeed. Bellatrix is the teacher in this story (because who wouldn’t want her as a teacher). It’s a WIP with only a couple of chapters out. 7/10 time to learn some real lessons, Granger ;)

Just a Brand features not only Bellatrix as a professor, but a magical soul mate bond between Bellatrix and Hermione that leads to much deliciousness. There’s a lot of chapters to this story but they’re pretty short. An updated and revised version can be found on a03 for those who like longer chapters. 7/10 Bellamione is branded on my soul.

It Just Felt Right is another fic with Bellatrix as the professor. Hermione starts off hating her and then it evolves into liking Bellatrix. The fic leaves off before any real progress can be made so if anyone is up for reading an unfinished fic from 2012 then go for it. 6/10 for this story feels right but not write because it’s abandoned :(

CRIME AU

Because there is never enough crime involved even with Bellatrix, these authors amp up the trouble and make it double. And gay. So very gay.

Two Sides of the Same Coin where Bellatrix is basically an auror. It’s only five chapters and it hasn’t been updated in a long time but it’s an interesting concept worth checking out. 9/10 wish there were more sides to the coin.

Murder Most Horrid A crime story, where Bellatrix is a magical cop and Hermione is a murder suspect. Bellatrix interrogates Hermione by banging her and then the two of them proceed to basically get married the day after. A bit ooc for Bellatrix but very in character if you consider this world not from the canon. -89/10 for how badly your vision will deteriorate if you try to read this all in one night.

The Mysterious Department Technically Bellatrix and Hermione are both magical detectives and they go and solve crimes and shit while also possibly trying to prevent the world from ending. You know, just casual stuff. 10/10 for the perfect crime, would commit again.

Darkness is Falling A story that has Hermione as an auror who replaces Bellatrix’s old partner. They butt heads, they solve cases, and naturally, begin to fall in love. 7/10 for this case is closed.

Some Things Aren’t Seen Hermione investigates Bellatrix’s crimes and past and ends up over her head. There are two follow ups to this finished work, all in the same vein. It’s all a good bit of fun watching Hermione try to take on the criminal Lestrange. 7/10, no, this has no relation to the musical Wicked.

SOUL MATE BOND

In one way or another Bellatrix and Hermione have a special bond in between them that destines them to be together. Angst, love, friendship, all abound in this au type. Features a combination of other factors thrown in, but the stories put in here are largely advertised in the blurb as more focused on the bond.

Lotus Flower Hermione finds out after Bellatrix’s death that they are bound together and that because Bellatrix is dead, Hermione is dying as a result too. This begs the question, will Hermione go back in time and save Bellatrix, or will she willingly submit to the bond’s curse? 8/10 I think we all know what Hermione chooses.

Our Mercurial Selves ever wonder what it would be like to have a murderer share your mind? In this one, Hermione and Bellatrix can communicate telepathically with each other, creating a bond that draws them together. Features evil schemes by Voldemort, a flying horse, and Narcissa beating the ever loving shit out of Bellatrix for even daring to breathe in Hermione’s direction. 9/10 will leave you with warm fuzzies for the Malfoy family before the ending crushes you.

The House Ring Bellatrix sends Hermione a magical ring that engages them and basically makes them wives. Prophecies abound about how Bellamione is meant to be the one and only true pairing. 7/10 for that ring better come with diamonds.

Demons AU

As if Voldemort isn’t scary enough, there are demons and scary things in this au type that will leave you and Voldemort both calling for mommy.

Unsteady Precipice technically also a time traveling fic, except Hermione ends up in an alternative universe. where she tries to change things from happening in the canon world like they did. But will it work? Who knows! Only a few chapters are out so it’s hard to tell where this story will go, but one things for sure, it’ll be good. 9/10 if you don’t pray after reading this the demons will get you.

A Demon in the Mist is also about, gasp, demons! Dangerous things are afoot in this story and Hermione is caught in the middle of it all. It takes part in the same universe as the caught in time series by the same author, but with slight alterations. Unsure if the story will be finished as the author has contemplated leaving fanfic writing. 7/10 can you find the demon in the mist?

MAGICAL CREATURES AU

Technically a category, right? Let’s pretend it is, because there are some stories out there that pit our two ladies as other than human and it’s fun to read about it.

As we Chase the Sun Very Black family centric and features Bellatrix as a big fluffy wolf. What’s not to love? Cuddles, and hair balls, and good times all around. 9/10 would tame that wolf.

Sing to me Your Insanity in which Hermione and Bellatrix are both sirens and will basically die if they don’t do the ol’ frickity frack. This is a long story and the slowburn feels like hellburn but it’s worth the read. 56/10 but you will need earplugs so those sirens don’t seduce you too.

Metamorphosis in which Bellatrix is also a wolf and doesn’t like being stuck with Hermione but gets used to it and basically they’re house wives of London and don’t know it. 8/10 for your mind with undergo metamorphosis from slightly obsessed with Bellamione to even more obsessed.

This Poisoned Blood of Ours vampires, vampires everywhere! Two parts to this series and features a confused Bellatrix and a changing Hermione. 7/10 do you think vampires like steak rare?

Cursed Doll Pretty self explanatory title. Someone ends up as a doll and shenanigans ensue. Won’t say more because it’s only two chapters, but it’s well written and worth a read. 10/10 Chucky? Is that your sister?

Liquid Measure these chapters are thicc boy. Only two chapters but such a good set up and everything. I hope the author is able to update at some point. 10/10 makes me thirsty for more!

My Demons in the Dark Hermione is a ghost. That’s it, that’s the plot. Boo/10 for this not so spooky spirit.

#Harry Potter #Harry Potter Books #Bellamione #Hermione Granger #Bellatrix Lestrange #emma Watson #Helena Bonham Carter #Bellamione fic recs #Fic recs #all gay stories #vampires #wolves #witches #time turner fics

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carmichealroyals · 3 years

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CHARACTER INSPIRATION // C H A L L E N G E

Rules: Write up a blurb or make a visual collage of the people or characters (from books, TV shows, movies, etc.) that inspired your OC, either visually, personality wise, or just a general vibe.

I was tagged by this by so many lovely pals -- @thelockwoodroyals, @wa-royal-tea AND @ourwillowcreekroyals !!! I only feel bad that it took me so long but I wanted it to be as perfect as it could be while taking time to fiddle with Photoshop more (thank you @royaldevilliers for answering my silly questions). Below the cut are the descriptions for the personality types and tropes for each of the main three kids of this next generation!

Not sure who’s done this yet, so if you see this and you want to do it, this is me telling you to do it!

CHARLOTTE:

The Protagonist: Protagonists are natural-born leaders, full of passion and charisma. Forming around two percent of the population, they are oftentimes our politicians, our coaches and our teachers, reaching out and inspiring others to achieve and to do good in the world. With a natural confidence that begets influence, Protagonists take a great deal of pride and joy in guiding others to work together to improve themselves and their community.

Spirited Young Lady: She is the girl who bends the rules just a little. Oh, she can dance a country dance or pour tea with the best of them, but she may also be a good walker or horseback rider. She may be the most intelligent girl in the story, and she is almost certainly the wittiest and the most outspoken, sometimes earning her the title of spitfire. She may be talented in more practical ways, as well: if given the opportunity, she may turn out to be a wise investor, and she may harbor talent for music, writing, or art that goes beyond drawing room entertainment and might become a means of financial independence if necessary. In rare cases, she may even solve a murder. Though she occasionally runs into some trouble, especially if she fails to obey the powers that be, she usually comes through in the end.

Deadpan Snarker: A character prone to gnomic, sarcastic, sometimes bitter, occasionally whimsical asides.The Deadpan Snarker exists to deflate pomposity, point out the unlikelihood of certain plans, and deliver funny lines. Typically the most cynical supporting character. In most cases, it is implied that the snarker would make a good leader, strategist, or consultant given their ability to instantly see the flaws in a constructed plan. More often than not, their innate snarkiness is the only thing preventing the other characters from comprehending this for themselves.

Politically Active Princess: The Politically Active Princess is a princess that takes active interest in and plays an active role in politics. Naive courtiers and commoners alike might view her only as a figurehead, but in truth, she discreetly uses her position and guile in order to achieve her ends. Skilled in diplomacy, she will usually attempt to solve conflicts via conversation or bargaining, rather than combat. Her defining trait is her involvement in politics or diplomatic matters, without letting herself serve only as a bargaining chip.

Inspired by: Mia Thermopolis (The Princess Diaries); Lorelai Gilmore (Gilmore Girls); Vex’ahlia (Critical Role); Jenny Lee (Call the Midwife)

PETER:

The Architect: It can be lonely at the top. As one of the rarest personality types – and one of the most capable – Architects (INTJs) know this all too well. Rational and quick-witted, Architects may struggle to find people who can keep up with their nonstop analysis of everything around them.

The Dog Bites Back: Unlike the Bastard Understudy and The Starscream, this character attacks as a crime of opportunity. There is no danger that he will take over the villain's place in the grand scheme of things. There is, however, a possibility that he will menace the others as a True Final Boss. The backstabber often ends up dead, but this is usually not Redemption Equals Death because their motive is not noble. Innocent victims who turn on the villain typically do it only for revenge, while evil victims prove that they were fine with all of the Big Bad's crimes except the one committed against them.

Middle Child Syndrome: Everyone loves the oldest child because the parents can rely on them, they watch out for their siblings, and they're so confidently attractive. The Youngest Child Wins because they're the "baby". But what does that leave the one in the middle? That's essentially the definition of Middle Child Syndrome, in which a child automatically may become The Unfavorite or the rebellious Black Sheep, specifically because they are the easiest child to overlook. They're not old enough to be given the responsibilities and privileges of the oldest, and the youngest child took their spot as the spoiled and doted-on "baby" of the family. This tends to be more of an issue when there are three children rather than four or more. Oftentimes in media, the middle child ends up becoming more of the Deadpan Snarker or the quirky one for this reason.

The Un-Favorite: Where there's an Alpha wolf, there's got to be a Beta. When there is a first banana, there is a second banana. This is the person in the family who can't get a break. For example, this is the child who's the big let-down to their parents, the daughter that was supposed to be a son (or vice-versa), the child the parents had by accident when they'd already decided they didn't need another mouth to feed, the adoptive, foster, or stepchild that came before the parents had a biological child, the illegitimate child conceived by infidelity on the part of one of the parents (if not even worse). But all in all, this is basically the kid who is always getting the short-end of the stick. In some extreme cases, this may cause Rich Sibling, Poor Sibling, especially if one sibling is forced into service to the other. A regular line that may be entailed with this is a variant of, "Honestly, [name], why can't you be more like [favorite's name]?"

Inspired by: Edith Crawley (Downton Abbey); Fiyero (Wicked: The Musical); Logan Huntzberger (Gilmore Girls); Rafael Solano (Jane the Virgin)

PEGGY:

The Mediator: Idealistic and empathetic, Mediators long for deep, soulful relationships, and they feel called to help others. But because this personality type makes up such a small portion of the population, Mediators may sometimes feel lonely or invisible, adrift in a world that doesn’t seem to appreciate the traits that make them unique.

The Baby of the Bunch: Being the youngest of your group typically comes with some perks and challenges. On one side you're probably the cutest, have a pass to act immature, people like taking care of you, and you can embrace your fun side, knowing that the elders are there to handle the serious stuff. And if there's anything you're naïve about, you have plenty of others to give you the realest unfiltered advice without the generational gap and detachment that your parents or the Old Master have. On the other end, sometimes people don't take you seriously. There you're kinda stuck because no matter how old you get, you'll always be "the baby" in their eyes.

Indifferent Beauty: A character who is attractive, aware of their effect on other people, but doesn't care or at least doesn't value their physical attractiveness over their other traits. Often, this character is a consummate professional who is well aware of the fact that they could use their "assets" to get what they want by other means, but feels that it would be unprofessional or beneath their dignity, and is instead focused on proving that they can compete purely on skill, often to the exclusion of romantic opportunities. While such characters are not averse to dressing in sexy outfits, they don't plan on relying on or even exploiting their sex appeal - but the camera will often do that for them. Other characters' indifference is not due to regarding relying on appearance to be beneath their dignity, but rather that they consider it to be unimportant.

Spoiled Sweet: The Spoiled Sweet character is a naive, spoiled, rich or comfortably upper-class or upper-middle-class girl, who has everything they could ever want, but instead of being mean, she is as nice as can be to everyone. While still spoiled, slightly naive, perhaps shallow, maybe even a bit selfish at times, when it comes right down to it, she is a loyal friend and doesn't use her money or popularity as an excuse to treat everyone like garbage — though the trope Rich in Dollars, Poor in Sense is in play, especially since a particularly common sticking point is that characters of this type often believe their friends and other loved ones deserve to live just as well as they do.

Inspired by: Rory Gilmore (Gilmore Girls); Beth March (Little Women); Pike Trickfoot (Critical Role); Peggy Schuyler (Hamilton: An American Musical)

#sim: princess charlotte #sim: prince peter #sim: princess margaret

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luminisvii · 3 years

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RATING! ALL! THE CHAR CLONES!

i love char and gundam loves him too so because i am BORED i'm gonna rate all characters that the wiki tells me qualifies as a char clone!

many of these men will be rated on aesthetics and their wiki blurb alone since i have not watched all gundams

i tried to include pics but it SAID i can only use ten. WHAT? how am i supposed to rate how sexy they are?

Char Aznable

the man. the myth. the legend. i love him so much. hes super fucking hot bc of how bad he is. like an absolute madlad he goes around destroying the zabis and giving amuro hell. hes so good that despite being on team evil he regularly tops popularity polls and is widely regarded as being super attractive. im asexual but i agree. char is supreme. he and his red mobile suits cannot be topped. 20/10

Quattro Bajeena

now, char might be evil, but this guy is totally a stand up dude who is definitely not char. and the hyaku shiki? top tier. also very sexy. maybe char should take a lesson or two from this lovely man. 18/10 could not possibly be char himself

Glemy Toto

i have not watched ZZ. this dude upholds the tradition of stupid ass names in gundam. he just kinda look like hes a good person, though, which would be nice, but i prefer the evil men here. 6/10 love the idiotic name

Afranche Char

apparently a literal char clone. don't give a fuck. 1/10

Carozzo Ronah/Iron Mask

this guy really takes the mask thing seriously. i have also not watched F91. i love the just robot lookin mask and the purple color scheme. 8/10

Anavel Gato

this guy is kind of a chump. i get the feeling i'm supposed to find gato very cool, but all i could see was a total loser pushover as long as it was in the name of zeon. although to be fair, he was basically one of the most enjoyable characters in the mess that is stardust memory. 7/10 too much of a zeon apologist

Chronicle Asher

i called gato a chump but this guy looks like a tool. hes got the mask! i know nothing about victory gundam but this guy looks like, okay. 5/10

Schwarz Bruder

im ignoring the other guy listed with him on the wiki bc Herr Bruder is in fact, awesome. he isn't on team evil like some others, but he doesn't need to be. hes a JESTER NINJA. what's not to love? somehow, despite me thinking i knew the twist that was coming, he was still full of surprises. you cannot possibly predict the actual twist here. he really teaches domon how to get shit done. 15/10 absolutely sublime take on the trope

Zechs Marquise

not only is he voiced by takehito koyasu, but he chars so hard he chars three times as fast! we LOVE his dedication to being a char clone. i will never forget how treize challenged him to a fair fight and he was just like nah lmao. you go you stinky man! 10/10 for char-ing hard

Lancerow Dawell and Jamil Neate

i am fascinated by after war X and i'll watch it one day. it seems like the wiki is confused about these two and is going with very surface level details for these two being char clones. however i'll rate them both higher bc i think mr. neate's sideburns and glasses are just top tier character design. 9/10

Harry Ord

10/10

Rau le Creuset

i think i saw him in the like three episodes of SEED i watched. he definitely looks the part. seems kinda lame though. 6/10

Athrun Zala

this kid is hilarious, and also the most likable character i met in SEED, and he even has a quattro phase as he goes by alex dino! we'll give him points for effort. 9/10 you tried

Neo Roanoke

definitely not mu la flaga. hes also voiced by takehito koyasu. his mask looks kinda dumb, but i think the long hair look upgrades my man mu. takehito koyasu makes everything sexier. 8/10 bc i also simp for dio brando

Rey Za Burrel

how many char clones does the SEEDverse have? i do appreciate rey's early 2000s brooding anime boy look, though. 5/10

Gilbert Durandal

WHY ARE THERE SO MANY SEED CHARS!!! this guy doesn't even look like a char clone, but he has the same voice actor and also apparently tries to drop shit on earth. we stan a king, honestly. 6/10 being in SEED deducts points

Hal Vizardt and Vladi Zarth

the wiki wont even give me a picture of these guys. 2/10 they get a point each

Ali Al-Saachez

i hate this guy. he sucks. normally i would find such endless villainy entertaining, but ali simply cannot work it in a way that's fun to watch or even in a way where you're like 'he's got a point.' he just sucks and i wish he could have been funny. we already have a char clone in graham anyway, so why are you here? bitch. 0/10 i was waiting for him to die

Graham Aker

he has all the tropes of being a char clone, and i loved him at first bc of his flair for drama and poetry, but alas! he got more and more sidelined for a different motherfucker. it's okay graham, i still love you! your mr. bushido phase was hilarious! 9/10 you deserved so much more

Full Frontal

hes getting points for the hilarious name but thats it. he is otherwise very boring. you cannot make me love a man just bc he is a literal char clone. 3/10

Zeheart Galette

AGE is also on my "deeply fascinated" list. eventually, eventually. i kinda dig this one's look. 7/10

Tatsuya Yuuki

initially, i hated yuuki bc i thought he was beating on middle schoolers for fun, but then i learned the dude is so goddamn passionate about gundam that he HAS to share it with others and honestly? king shit. while he's technically a char clone, i think he's actually a graham aker clone. the dude stans 00. an admirable position to be in. i love yuuki so much and hes my favorite build fighters character. 15/10 i will always respect the meijin

Captain Mask

the name is hilarious. hes got a cool mask too. i'll maybe watch recon one day bc of how ridiculous the reputation is. 8/10

Lady Kawaguchi

the rare female one, and proves that the kawaguchi name requires you to be extra as fuck. compared to yuuki's raw passion, she's cool and knows it, and doesn't need to flex. sadly doesn't get to do a lot. 10/10

McGillis Fareed

MCGILLIS MY BELOVED!!!! perhaps the only char clone that matters. this dude brings back the classic level of backstabbing, the supreme attractiveness, and in general, being an awful person. but i can't help but feel for the guy. he was trying his goddamn hardest to overturn a fucked up system. he also simply could not fathom having friends. mcgillis might only do the mask thing for a little and also wears a wig (McWiggis) but i forgive him, because the moves he does in bael are truly sexy. i adore mcgillis i have to rate him high but he cannot overtake the classic. 19/10 would let him betray me

Kyoya Kujo

even the wiki doesn't seem confident in this one. i like his look though. hes kinda got some gentle eyes, so i will assume he's the more quattro flavor of things. 6/10

Masaki Shido

BRUHHHH HE LOOKS LIKE A KNIGHT. 10/10

Honorable Mentions:

Master Asia

i didn't think he truly qualified as a char clone. he hits the villain thing and technically has some ideals aligned with char ? but he's a little too different. lacks majority of the archetype tropes. i still love him though 9/10

Vidar

hes got a mask and wants revenge. definitely not gaelio. the problem is, we already have mcgillis in IBO. i just don't register gaelio as being a char clone, because mcgillis is out here being the worst. gaelio is a wonderful character in his own right for all the opposite reasons that mcgillis is fantastic for being the worst. 10/10 i want nothing but the best for him

Ulube Ishikawa

just bc he has a mask covering half his face and is evil doesn't mean he's a char clone, wiki! and how dare you take away from schwarz just to be like "well ulube has a mask" WE HAVE ONE ALREADY!!! i also hate ulube. he is not a particularly charismatic character, but he isn't supposed to be. 2/10

and thus is my arbitrary ranking of the char clones. some people think char clones are bad. i for one, love them! i hope future entries have more masked men.

#luminiscore

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musette22 · 4 years

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Anal Fingering 101

By @paper-storm & @musette22

Pairing: Chris Evans x Sebastian Stan (Evanstan)

Word count: 6.6k

Rating: E (so 18+ only please!)

A/N: Yup. Anal Fingering 101. That’s what we’re calling it. That’s the fic. We're just still quarantine horny and got excited about this concept after discussing the above gif and then we wrote this. It got weird but also (we think) strangely sweet and hot. We hope you agree 🤷🏻

Summary: The one where Sebastian (jokingly) suggests they should make a sex tutorial video and upload it to PornHub, Chris (not jokingly) agrees, and Sebastian doesn't know what he's gotten himself into.

Read on AO3

**************************************************

Sebastian stretches languidly. Feels a slow moan rumble through his chest, unsure if it actually escapes his lips or if it dies before it gets there. He’s warm, and the sheets below his bare skin are soft, and it feels like hours, they’ve been at this, Sebastian laid out on their bed like a sultan and Chris down between his legs, two fingers buried in him. It’s leisurely, this time.

Certainly not always. They have their quick, we have to be there in less than an hour, hurry up! times and their intense, emotional times and their wild times where Chris is worked up and is rough and punishing, making Sebastian see stars and hiss in pleasure-pain and forget his own name six times before they’re done. Other times, like this one, Chris likes to go meticulously slow. Take his sweet time, sliding his warm tongue over every inch of Sebastian’s body, touching him gently and then taking his hands away to prolong it, playing Sebastian like a treasured instrument so that by the time he finally comes, eons later, it’s not with a kick and a shout but unhurried and deep and soulful, like it’s trapped in honey.

He loves every possible way they do this, every single thing Chris does to him and every single thing he does to Chris in return, but it’s possible this is his favorite way. When Chris just adores him, slathers him in attention and kisses to his hipbones and quiet, heartfelt praises. It’s also possible his favorite way is whatever is currently happening, and he’ll change his mind by tomorrow.

“Mm,” Sebastian hums, making a real noise this time, as the tips of Chris’s talented fingers find his prostate again and rub slowly against the gland.

“Feelin’ good?” Chris asks, Boston charm, sweetly eager to please him, while at the same time smug because he knows he is.

“Yeah,” Sebastian sighs. “You gonna get on with it at some point? Or just torture me forever?”

“Hmm.” Chris pretends to think about it. While he contemplates, he takes the head of Sebastian’s leaking cock into his mouth, and swirls his tongue around the head, into the foreskin, where it’s hot and sensitive. Then he slides down, taking Sebastian fully into his mouth, sucking just once before he rises up and lets it fall away. Sebastian swears in a whisper and pants, the tease lighting him up, the cool air on his now-wet dick making him shiver and ache for more.

“Chris,” he says, on a shaky laugh, draping an arm over his eyes.

“I’m undecided,” Chris says, even though he isn’t. He cups one of Sebastian’s legs, just under the knee, and lifts it, so he can slide his tongue along Sebastian’s inner thigh, leaving trails of moisture and blowing on them. The fingers of his other hand, still massaging Sebastian’s prostate, withdraw and press back in a few times, but slow enough that it couldn’t be described as a thrust. Just teasing him.

“You’re evil,” Sebastian tells him.

“You’re beautiful,” Chris returns, earnest against the junction of Sebastian’s hip and thigh.

It makes Sebastian shiver again, for reasons other than physical this time.

“Love this so much.” Chris puts Sebastian’s leg over his shoulder and leans back down, nuzzling into his heavy balls as he continues, “love this body. Love you letting me have it. Love the noises you make.”

His fingers search, again finding that fireworks spot inside and working it, a little more insistent, now, but still meant as a tease. It’s one of those times, Sebastian can tell. It will be ages before Chris lets him come. Chris might not even fuck him. They might not even get that far. He might just stay right where he is, massaging inside, until Sebastian gets too close to the edge of that cliff and can’t stop himself from tipping over it.

“You’re… oh,” Sebastian breathes, chest heaving suddenly, as Chris rubs harder unexpectedly, just for a moment, and then lets up again. “Fuck. You’re good at this.”

“I had a good teacher,” Chris says, earnest again, all that sweetness that ruined Sebastian so thoroughly when they’d first met.

Sebastian closes his eyes and smiles, remembering. Remembering how Chris had experimented a few times with other guys but it had mostly consisted of quick, shameful hand-jobs or hurriedly sticking his dick down some extra’s throat in a back office, before rushing back out onto a set feeling hot and wrong. He remembers showing Chris so many things, when they finally stopped dancing around each other and gave into what they’d both wanted since the moment they shook hands.

“The student has become the master,” Sebastian jokes, and Chris rumbles out a chuckle. “I mean it. You should do like, one of those sex tutorials on PornHub. ‘Finding the G-Spot 101’, except for anal fingering.”

“Ooh, baby, say anal fingering again,” Chris says, faking a moan, and Sebastian giggles and covers his face, his whole body flushing, but in a good way.

Chris returns to his task, dragging the flat of his tongue up the underside of Sebastian’s erection, digging the tip in below the head. Then, in a contemplative voice, he says, “maybe we should.”

Sebastian laughs again, and reaches down to thread his fingers into Chris’s hair, soft right now because they’d showered earlier and Chris hadn’t put any product in it. “Sure,” he says.

Chris looks up at him. Blue eyes shining, through his thick eyelashes, blinking at him with an expression that takes Sebastian by surprise. He pushes up to his own elbows, so they can exchange a more significant look. Not breaking their eye contact, Chris licks at him again, making a show of sliding his tongue in a zigzag across Sebastian’s dick, apparently intent on breaking Sebastian’s brain.

Chris replies to the question in Sebastian’s eyes with a shrug. “Let’s do it,” he says, and Sebastian can’t, for the life of him, work out whether Chris is still kidding.

But then Chris crooks his fingers while his soft, lush lips close around the head of his cock again, and for a while Sebastian forgets everything that isn’t heat and slide and wonderful, delicious pressure.

---

“So, about that video.”

Sebastian lowers his book and looks up at Chris upside down, from where he’s resting his head in Chris’s lap. “Huh?”

“That tutorial you mentioned last night.”

Instead of replying, Sebastian gets temporarily sidetracked by Chris’s ridiculous eyelashes, fanning out delicately over his cheekbones. When the words finally register, he blinks.

“Tutorial? What are you – oh.”

“Whaddaya say?” Chris asks, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Sebastian’s own eyebrows rise slowly towards his hairline. “You’re not serious.”

“Why wouldn’t I be? Come ooooon, Sebby,” he cajoles. “It’ll be fun.”

“So,” Sebastian says pushing himself up into a sitting position and turning to look at Chris. “You wanna like… roleplay? Pretend we’re shooting some sort of porn video?”

Chris shrugs easily. “Who says we’ll be pretending? You know me, I’m a show off. I kind of like the idea of showing other people how to please their partner.” He raises an eyebrow. “Plus, I’d be showing off my beautiful boyfriend in the process, right? And you can’t tell me you don’t like the idea of me putting you on display and having my way with you in front of thousands of strangers.”

Sebastian swallows. There really isn’t any use trying to pretend he doesn’t like the sound of that – Chris knows him far, far too well for that, judging by the devious twinkle in his eye.

“Think about it,” Chris goes on, slowly running a hand up Sebastian’s thigh. Sebastian helplessly lets his legs fall open a little bit wider. “I’ll lay you out on the bed, make sure the camera captures all of that beautiful, smooth skin. Spread those beautiful legs wide to give ‘em a good view, hm? And then I’ll slick you up and rub on you a little until you’re all pliant and relaxed, slide a couple’a fingers inside, one by one, open you up slowly for everyone to see. And then I’ll show ‘em how to find your sweet spot, all the way up inside you, rub it nice ‘n slow until you start makin’ those pretty little noises for me…”

“Jesus, Chris,” Sebastian breathes, blood rushing in his ears, dick throbbing in his sweats. “You’re a fucking menace, you know that? Everyone thinks you’re this big, happy golden retriever, but really your mind’s in the gutter twenty-four seven.”

Chris’s grin isn’t repentant in the slightest. “Only when I’m around you, sugar. Can’t help it, you’re just so fuckin’ sexy all the time. ‘Sides, there’s no need to act all virtuous, baby. I’ve got your number. I know you need it just as bad as I do.” To prove his point, his big hand slides over the bulge in Sebastian’s sweatpants, squeezing it lightly.

Sebastian curses, hips jerking into Chris’s grip, which only makes the smirk on Chris’s handsome face that much more smug.

“So?” Chris asks again, leaning in to press his nose into the spot just below Sebastian’s left ear. “You in, sweetheart? You gonna let me show you off?”

“Fuck you, Evans,” Sebastian says weakly, tilting back his head to give Chris better access. “Of course I’m fucking in, what do you think?”

“I can’t decide whether you’re being a good boy or a brat right now,” Chris rumbles in his ear, teeth nipping briefly at his earlobe. “But I guess it doesn’t matter so much if I’m getting what I want.”

Before Sebastian can object, Chris is climbing off the couch, his big, lean body towering over him as he holds out his hand. Sebastian takes it instinctively and Chris pulls him up so quickly Sebastian stumbles a little.

“Whoa, we in a hurry or something?” he asks, steadying himself on Chris’s tiny waist.

“To get you naked?” Chris grins, leaning down to steal a quick kiss. “Always.”

---

“Move up a little higher for me, baby.”

The instruction comes from where Chris is squatting behind their side table, looking at Sebastian through the lens of his expensive camera, which he propped up against a stack of books – Foucault’s History of Sexuality among them, Sebastian notes with faint amusement. He wonders briefly how Michel would’ve felt about his seminal work being used for this particular purpose, and then decides that he probably would’ve cheered them on.

“Shift that pillow a bit to the right, don’t want it hiding that pretty face of yours.”

Sebastian still blushes like Chris hasn’t called him pretty a thousand times before, and does as he’s told. “Like this?”

Chris regards him critically, tilting his head a little as if he’s assessing the shot. He’s got his director’s hat on, Sebastian thinks, and something about that, about Chris looking so capable and in charge, has him feeling hot under the collar. Well, that’s if he were wearing one. As it is, he’s not wearing anything at all. He’s stretched out in the center of the king-size bed, propped up a little on a couple of pillows, as naked as the day he was born.

“Perfect,” Chris decides. “Stay right there for me.”

“Yes, sir,” Sebastian mumbles, and Chris shoots him a look that says, don’t get smart with me, sweetheart.

All that does is make Sebastian squirm, which earns him a raised eyebrow, which only makes him want to squirm more. It’s a vicious circle, really. Chris can play him too easily.

“Now what?” he asks, eyes tracking Chris’s movement through their bedroom. Chris is wearing dark wash jeans and a white, short-sleeved t-shirt that strains across his shoulders and biceps but hangs loosely around his waist. His proportions are so ridiculous, it’s damn-near impossible to find shirts that fit him properly. Sebastian thinks he should probably mind that Chris gets to be fully clothed for this while Sebastian’s got all his most private parts out for everyone to see, but he can’t find it in himself to object. If he’s honest, he likes it. Likes it a whole lot.

Chris grabs the lube from the nightstand, tossing it onto the mattress. “Patience,” he says, belatedly replying to Sebastian’s question. “All I need you to do for this one is lay back and look pretty.” He comes to stand at the side of the bed, one hand on the mattress as he leans over Sebastian and brushes a feather-light kiss over his forehead, his cheeks, the cleft in his chin. “You think you can do that for me, Sebastian?”

Sebastian exhales, feeling a little unsteady. “Yeah, I think so,” he nods. He tilts his face up, shamelessly angling for a proper kiss.

Chris laughs silently but obliges, catching Sebastian’s lips in a soft, fairly innocent kiss that still leaves Sebastian feeling like there’s an electrical current running through his skin. When Chris pulls back, Sebastian runs the tip of his tongue over his tingling lips. He wants more, wants Chris to climb on top of him, kiss him again, devour him, but Chris doesn’t, and other parts of Sebastian are left tingling as Chris turns his attention toward the camera and Sebastian realizes again how utterly naked he is while Chris is still fully clothed.

“So, hi,” Chris starts. His voice is different. Higher, clearer, like he’s performing. Which, Sebastian realizes with a swoop in his gut, he is. “I’m, uh, Chris. Evans. You probably know that already. Or maybe you don’t, I don’t wanna act like I’m some big shot.”

He chuckles, and shrugs modestly, and Sebastian snorts. “You’re Captain America,” he reminds him.

“Yes, I am,” Chris agrees, grinning down at Sebastian, and then back at the camera. He gestures at Sebastian, who cringes as he’s slapped in the face with how completely ridiculous this is. “This gorgeous slab of man-meat is Sebastian Stan, my – oh. I guess technically most of you didn’t know, yet, that he’s my boyfriend.”

“Well they fuckin’ know now,” Sebastian cracks up, a little delirious at the notion of what a completely insane way this would be to come out to millions of people. “Man-meat?”

“I also said you were gorgeous,” Chris points out, winking.

Sebastian laughs. “That makes it better.” He feels crazy, like he’s spinning around on an amusement park ride and can’t get off. They’re not going to actually post this. There’s no way Chris was serious, Sebastian thinks. But he doesn’t know. And that thrills him a little more than it probably should.

It’s all hot and confusing and Sebastian is undeniably turned on even though Chris has barely touched him below the shoulders, his cock thickening where it’s laying against his belly.

“Today, we’re going to show you how to… God, how do I even say this?” Chris giggles, embarrassed, and then gives himself a shake and restarts. He points authoritatively in the direction of the lens. “No, this is important. Today we’re going to show you how to make your biologically male partner feel real good using just – ” he wiggles his thick fingers, “ – these.”

He sits, making the mattress dip next to Sebastian’s hip, and looks down at him. There’s nerves and excitement swimming in Chris’s clear turquoise eyes, and he smiles a little, and Sebastian feels like that one is just for him. He’s likely pleading again, with his own eyes, for a kiss, because Chris braces a hand next to his arm on the bed and leans further over to slide their mouths together. His tongue slips in, and Sebastian moans quietly around it, bringing his hands up to hold Chris’s face.

Chris is smiling into their kiss and whispers, “love you,” barely loud enough for Sebastian to hear. Then, louder, talking to the camera and their future audience again, he says, “you gotta warm them up first. Never wanna just dive right in, gotta get them feelin’ good and relaxed and turned on.”

Again, Sebastian is about to say something, add to the commentary somehow, but he’s too embarrassed so he doesn’t. The heated flush travels all the way down his chest. Chris follows it with his lips, sucking small bruises into Sebastian’s neck, collarbone, lips finding a nipple and closing around it. Teeth squeeze the bud and then his tongue soothes the sting and Sebastian gasps a little and buries his fingers in Chris’s hair.

“Not all guys are into this so much,” Chris says, as he moves over to the other nipple. He turns his head to look at the camera, adding, “try it out, though, so you know for sure. ‘Cause he is.”

“I’m –” Sebastian begins, searching for something to protect his dignity, but the words die in his throat as Chris closes his lips around his other nipple and sucks, hard. Sebastian twitches, and pleasure rolls through him, and he whimpers.

Chris lingers, for a lot longer than he needs to, like he forgot himself a bit and got lost it kissing and licking at Sebastian’s chest. By the time warm fingers curl around his erection as Chris sits up, Sebastian barely needs them before they move onto the reason they’re actually here. He’s already hard, moisture already left in trails across his hip, but Chris strokes him anyway, looking down at him with darkened eyes that leave Sebastian shivering. Chris squeezes, twists his fist, works him just perfect, and Sebastian reaches out, patting his forearm.

“Chris,” he breathes. Get on with it, is what he’s trying to communicate, if you want me to last. It’s hardly been anything, it’s humiliating that he’s this worked up already, but it’s everything. Sebastian can’t lie even to himself, the idea that a camera is rolling, that thousands, maybe even millions of people might watch this, has his head spinning. It isn’t news to him that he has tendencies like this, that he likes being on display and appreciated, consumed by hungry eyes and maybe embarrassed a little. It’s news to him that he likes the idea of strangers watching him quite this much.

“Kinda wanna do everything to you,” Chris murmurs to him, probably loud enough that the microphone will pick it up, but soft enough that he’s talking to Sebastian and not their audience. “Show ‘em how to suck you off, how to eat you out, how to fuck you.”

“Chris.” Sebastian shivers again, hot and cold running through him like a fever, and gets dizzy at the thought of it. At people he knows seeing him like this. Seeing him laid out and cherished, brought to orgasm in any number of ways by Chris’s talented hands and mouth and cock. Seeing him loved, but also used. It’s a confusing, desperately arousing tangle of emotions deep in his gut.

“Make sure your fingernails are short and clean,” Chris instructs, suddenly all business again, focusing back on the camera and his task, “and use lots of lube.”

Sebastian can’t even tell if he’s also turned on, because he’s still in jeans and Sebastian can’t really see his lower half from this position. Sebastian almost wouldn’t be surprised if he wasn’t – if Chris was taking this so seriously, so earnestly, like he does everything, that it wasn’t even affecting him in that way. Too busy being a professional, too busy caring about what they’re doing as if it’s actually important. That thought thrills him too. That in a way, this isn’t even really sex. Not if Chris isn’t getting off on it, too. It’s entirely performative.

“Especially if they’ve never done it before. It’s gonna feel a bit strange at first, before he gets used to it and knows what to expect, so making sure it’s nice and slippery helps. You don’t want it to hurt.”

“Speaking from experience?” Sebastian asks, finally finding his voice enough to make a shadow of a quip.

Chris grins at him. “Yeah, I am.” He looks back at the camera, but nods his head toward Sebastian. “He’s pretty good at this, too. Maybe we’ll have to show you that, sometime.”

Sebastian shudders at the thought. He’s pretty sure he’d be so embarrassed he’d melt right out of his skin, if he was expected to run this show. He’s also pretty sure he’d love it. Getting his hands on Chris’s body and waxing poetic about it are kind of two of his favorite things in the world, after all.

“Now,” Chris goes on, “find a position that works for you both. Your partner could be on his front for this, which could give you easier access, but Sebastian here usually prefers to be on his back.” He pauses and quirks a cheeky eyebrow at the camera before adding, “he likes to watch.”

He’s not wrong. Sebastian can never get enough of watching Chris’s face while they make love, seeing the awe and hunger and adoration there as he lavishes attention on Sebastian’s body, wringing every last drop of pleasure from it. It’s humbling and intoxicating and so goddamn sexy. Still, Chris saying those words to the camera, in that tone, makes Sebastian feel almost dirty, like he’s some sort of voyeur, peeping on his own life. A voyeur and an exhibitionist, it seems.

Chris is kneeled on the mattress now, between Sebastian’s spread legs. “As you can see, Sebastian likes to keep himself nice and tidy. Some people will opt to go natural – not everyone’s going to like waxing or shaving and that’s completely fine, as long as you make sure you’re clean.”

Oh God, Sebastian thinks, a trickle of shame running through him. This shouldn’t be hot. He’s discussing intimate hygiene, for crying out loud. Chris talking about whether Sebastian washed his ass before he presented himself like an offering should not be turning him on, and yet it does. It’s something about the detached tone of Chris’s voice, his almost clinical instructions, that have Sebastian feeling like he’s there just for Chris’s convenience and enjoyment. Like he’s a prop; an instrument that Chris is teaching their audience how to play. It makes Sebastian so wildly, unreasonably horny, it’s almost unbearable. He tries to hide how much it’s affecting him, to steady his breathing as much as possible, but Chris doesn’t even seem to notice, focused as he is on his task.

“Lube’s naturally quite chilly,” Chris states matter-of-factly, as he squirts a generous amount of it onto the fingers of his right hand. Some spills onto the comforter, but he doesn’t pay it any mind. “So you’re gonna want to warm it up a little, by rubbin’ it between your fingers. It’s not imperative, but it is the nice thing to do.”

Sebastian huffs a breathless laugh. “Thanks,” he says weakly.

Chris winks at him. “Anytime, sweetheart.” His expression turns a bit more serious. “Ready?” he asks, as if making sure that Sebastian is still up for this.

“God, yeah.”

Chris smirks and turns towards the camera. “If you’ve done a good job warming him up, he’ll be pretty eager at this point. That’s good, ‘cause that means he’ll be more likely to be relaxed and receptive.”

Sebastian’s face is flaming. He can’t believe Chris is calling him out like that, basically calling Sebastian a needy bottom, but fuck if that isn’t true, at this point. He almost wants to tell Chris to hurry up, to put his fingers inside him already, but stays silent. He doesn’t get to make demands right now. He just gets to lie there and look pretty, let Chris use him however he sees fit.

The next moment, Chris is reaching down, sliding his slippery fingers between Sebastian’s cheeks and starting to slick him up. Sebastian shivers, goosebumps erupting all over his body at finally being touched where he’s been aching for it.

“Like I said before, it’s important to use lots of lube, make sure he’s nice and wet. When that’s done, you can start by rubbing on him a little, to try and relax the muscle as much as possible before you penetrate it.” He does exactly as he says, rubbing slow, insistent little circles around Sebastian’s entrance with his thumb, before switching to his forefinger and finally pressing the wide tip of it inside.

Even though this is hardly the first time Chris has done this to him, Sebastian still clenches instinctively around Chris’s thick forefinger, and Chris reaches for Sebastian’s cock with his left hand, slowly stroking him as he pushes his finger in deeper.

“Always start with a single finger, and go slow when you push it in. It’s normal to feel resistance, it’s the body’s natural response to an unusual intrusion, but do make sure your partner is comfortable and try to help him relax as much as possible.”

“Mmm,” Sebastian sighs, wiggling his hips a little bit to spur Chris on.

Chris chuckles, a low, rumbling sound. “For some people, it might take a while before they get used to the feeling, so make sure you give them time to adjust before you try to up the dosage. Other people, like Sebastian here, are more… experienced, and will want you to start moving right away.” He demonstrates by pulling his finger most of the way out again before pushing back in, rotating his finger as he slides it in and out of him easily. “As you can see, Sebastian has no trouble taking a single finger. He also likes it when it burns, just a little bit – don’tcha, baby?”

Already, Chris is lining up a second finger next to the first and starts to push against his rim, forcing his middle finger inside, too. Sebastian blows out a quick breath, trying to relax. It still burns a bit, because Chris’s fingers are solid and wide, but like Chris said, he does like the sting.

“Uh huh,” Sebastian groans, gritting his teeth.

“Yeah,” Chris replies, sounding almost contemplative, “that’s it. See how well he takes it?”

That last bit is aimed at the camera again, and Sebastian has to stifle a moan. Jesus. Hearing Chris talk like that, as if Sebastian isn’t even there, is so much hotter than he would ever have anticipated.

“Now, with two fingers, you can start scissoring a little. Don’t try to force anything, just incrementally widen your fingers, gently loosening that tight ring of muscle, coaxing him open. Be patient. Don’t rush, and don’t forget to keep checking in on your partner, see if he’s doing alright. You want to be making him feel good, first and foremost. If he’s not feeling good at this point, chances are you’re not doin’ it right.” Chris has been mostly watching either his own hand or the camera up until this point, but now he’s looking up at Sebastian, his expression earnest and attentive. “You feelin’ good, sweetheart? Nothin’ hurting?”

Sebastian, struggling to keep his breathing level, shakes his head. “Nothing hurts. Feels good.”

“Good,” Chris hums, satisfied. “That’s good, baby.”

It’s not even really praise, and yet Sebastian lights up at Chris’s words. Chris is pleased with him. He’s being good. That knowledge alone feels almost as good as the two thick fingers buried in his ass, rubbing against his inner walls as Chris starts to slowly fingerfuck him.

Getting distracted from his lesson plan for a moment, Chris leans down and licks up the underside of Sebastian’s dick. He takes it into his mouth, the same way he had the other day. He sucks, slow and controlled, and Sebastian swears and covers his face. It’s so good, and at the same time it feels dangerous, because they didn’t discuss him doing that.

Chris lets it fall out of his mouth again, and turns back toward where the camera is still rolling, faithfully capturing every inch of this hot, confusing, crazy thing Chris managed to goad him into. “Seb likes just being fingered for a while, not having it immediately leading anywhere, just enjoying the sensations. Other guys might not be into that, so keep communicating.”

He does as he says, just slowly sliding his fingers in and out of Sebastian, slippery from the lube, catching on his rim, Sebastian’s whole body still thrumming with the dirty thrill of having an audience, even though that audience doesn’t technically exist yet.

“When you want to find the prostate,” Chris says, a little quieter, the only sign he’s affected at all by any of this, “you wanna aim about two inches in, and upwards. It’ll feel like… you’ll feel it, when you find it. Kinda unmistakable. Then crook your fingers up and towards yourself, like you’re doing that ‘come here’ motion.”

He does it, and Sebastian gasps.

“Right there?” Chris asks, a self-satisfied grin apparent in his voice.

Sebastian nods and feels like he can’t open his eyes or the room will spin away into space. “Fuck, yeah. There.”

“It feels really good,” Chris tells the camera. “Orgasms from just this are out of this world, I’m tellin’ you. You can also provide additional stimulation of the prostate from the outside, by rubbing your thumb over his perineum, applying light pressure.”

He keeps talking as he fingers and strokes, but Sebastian can’t hear him anymore. It’s just more instructions, more tips, and it all falls away into the white noise rushing through his head. He’d meant what he said, when he made the comment that started all this. Chris is good at this. Too good at it, and Sebastian’s whole body is on fire. Warmth spreads out, his skin prickles, and he wants Chris’s mouth back on his dick but at the same time, like this, he can focus solely on the other sensations because there aren’t competing ones.

“Chris,” he mumbles, feeling it bubble up unexpectedly fast, whether because Chris is paying so much attention to the gland inside or because the idea of doing this on camera is so hot and shameful all wrapped up into one, he couldn’t say, but his gut is clenching. He tries to warn Chris, tries to stop it, but then Chris’s fingers press right there, unrelenting right on the perfect spot, and Sebastian loses it. He grunts and comes in slow, all-consuming waves, cock spilling over his quivering stomach as his breath comes in pants so harsh they burn in his lungs.

Chris stops mid-sentence, and his fingers stop moving, and when Sebastian opens his eyes Chris is staring at him, eyes wide and lips slightly parted. Sebastian wants to hide. To recoil into himself, dive under the covers and never, ever come back out. He wasn’t supposed to do that. They’d discussed it, all the details, this morning. It was meant to be educational, Chris had dutifully insisted with doe-eyes, not actual pornography. Chris was going to demonstrate what needed to be demonstrated and then turn the camera off, and keep the ending just between them. Chris may be a show off, as he’d said, but he’s also possessive, and didn’t want anybody else to see what Sebastian looks or sounds like when he comes. Chris wanted that to remain just his.

Renewed embarrassment flies like wildfire over Sebastian’s bare skin, and he covers his face with his hand. “I’m sorry,” he whines.

Chris is quiet just for another moment, and his fingers slowly retreat and leave Sebastian’s body, and Sebastian prepares himself to be scolded. Instead, Chris’s fingers drag through the mess Sebastian left on his stomach. Sebastian looks down at it, the mess of sticky white on his own skin and Chris’s fingertips in it, and then up at Chris, blinking in confusion. Chris looks back, his mouth still open and his eyes wild.

“Jesus Christ,” he whispers, shaking his head, and then he’s surging down, mouth crashing into Sebastian’s so hard it hurts, devouring his lips in a ravenous kiss.

“That felt so good,” Sebastian breathes, admitting it into the space between them, and Chris growls low in his throat.

“You’re so fuckin’ sexy, I can’t stand it,” he says, sounding almost pained.

It’s a half hour at least before they remember the camera is still rolling.

---

They take a shower, and a nap, and order a pizza. Neither of them brings up watching the recording, but Sebastian knows they both want to. Chris doesn’t mention it, so Sebastian doesn’t either, but it remains unspoken between them. Finally, well after the sun has gone down, Chris just grabs the camera and an HDMI cable and starts hooking it up to the T.V. in his living room, without a word. Sebastian gets nervous all over again, and excited, and ashamed, that confusing jumble of emotions returning in his chest as he settles on the couch and Chris plops heavily down beside him.

“What if it’s awful?” he asks, with a laugh, trying to make it a joke to hide how unsure he is about it. He’s heard horror stories, of people making their own sex tapes and finding out they don’t look nearly as good as they thought.

“Then we delete it and never speak of it again,” Chris says. He puts an arm around Sebastian, pulling him in and kissing his hair. “But it won’t be. You’re gorgeous. Everyone thinks so.”

“Everyone hasn’t seen my dick,” Sebastian points out, and Chris chuckles warmly.

“I’m glad to hear it. But, that’s gorgeous too.” He presses a button on the remote, and they appear on the screen, Sebastian naked on the bed and Chris’s voice behind the camera.

The thing is, Sebastian is an actor, and as such he’s used to seeing himself on the screen. Not that he watches his own movies in his spare time or anything like that, but since he has to attend his own movie premieres, he sees all of his movies at least once. So he’s not a stranger to watching his own face. Watching his own, stark naked body on a T.V. screen, however, is a bit of a novelty. He’s been pretty damn close to fully nude on camera a couple of times but between the combination of movie magic and stunt doubles, it was nothing like this. This is just him. No filters, no clever angles. Bare in a way he never has been before, the shot immobile and continuous and leaving absolutely nothing to the imagination.

“That’s what I look like naked?” He’s seen himself in the mirror, but somehow this feels different from that, too.

“It is,” Chris says into Sebastian’s hair. “What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking I look…” Sebastian hesitates before finishing, “…pretty good.”

Chris huffs, jostling his shoulders. “You don’t gotta be so modest, baby. Admit it, you look incredible.”

“I don’t look incredible,” Sebastian protests, but that’s the moment when on-screen Chris leans over on-screen Sebastian and kisses him, and Sebastian transforms. From one moment to the next, he goes from self-conscious and tense, seemingly hyper-aware of the fact that he’s naked and being filmed, to just melting into Chris’s touch. The Sebastian on the T.V. positively flourishes, turning into Chris like a flower turns to the sun, moaning softly as Chris kisses his neck, his chest and then pays special attention to his nipples. Real-life Sebastian’s skin prickles watching it, like feeling ghosts of those lips on his body right now.

And suddenly, Sebastian thinks Chris kind of has a point. Together, they look pretty stunning.

“Oh,” he says, softly.

“Wow,” Chris whispers, seeing it too, just as captivated as Sebastian. “I’ve never… I mean, I see you, all the time. But never like this, never get to just sit back and watch you… fuck, sweetheart. So responsive, so perfect for me, I can’t believe-” He trails off, distracted by the scene unfolding on the T.V. screen.

Sebastian’s not sure whether to focus on the way Chris is lavishing attention on his chest as Sebastian arches up to meet him, or the way Sebastian can see his own cock thickening against his stomach the longer Chris loves on him. It’s mindboggling and strangely exciting at the same time. Watching Chris turn his attention back to the camera, going methodically through his instructions about lube and clean fingernails, fills Sebastian with the same dirty thrill as it did at the time. Although watching it back, he feels a lot less like he’s just a body for Chris to demonstrate on. He sees love in Chris’s open expression, that he hadn’t noticed when it was really happening.

“See that?” Chris asks, as if there’s any chance Sebastian could not be watching the screen right now. He couldn’t tear his eyes away if he tried. Chris is so close to him, still with his arm snug around Sebastian’s shoulders, talking reverently into his hairline. “Now you see why I can’t keep my eyes or my hands off you? You’re fucking gorgeous, Seb, especially when you’re naked and laid out like that, all open and willing. Wanting me so badly.”

“Needy, you mean,” Sebastian murmurs.

“Sexy as hell,” Chris corrects, lifting Sebastian’s left hand to his face and pressing a kiss to the back of it. He nods towards the screen. “Look at yourself. Look how turned on you are from just one of my fingers inside you. Imagine how that makes me feel.”

“How?” Sebastian asks breathlessly, eyes still glued to the screen, where Chris is now pushing a second finger into him, all the while describing what he’s doing while Sebastian tries his hardest not to burst into flames.

From the corner of his eye, he can see Chris turning his head to look at him. When Sebastian does the same and meets his gaze, he shivers at the naked want and adoration reflected back at him.

“Like I’m the king of the fucking world, baby,” Chris tells him in that almost painfully sincere way of his, leaving Sebastian with no choice but to attack him with kisses, breathless, rash and joyful.

A loud moan from the direction of the T.V. pulls their attention back to the screen, just in time to see Sebastian’s eyes rolling back as he comes with his dick untouched, spilling onto his own stomach while Chris looks at him like he’s one of the seven wonders of the world. With a rush of heat in his gut, Sebastian remembers how embarrassing that was, and how hot it was at the same time. How intense it felt, how intense it looks, his own chest rising and falling as on-screen Chris reaches out to drag his fingers through the mess Sebastian made of himself.

“Holy shit, Sebastian,” real life Chris curses, and Sebastian – surprising even himself – giggles. It’s just all so absurd. Hearing himself moan like that and watching himself having sex on T.V. like he’s in some sort of cheap, homemade porno (which he supposes this is, actually) is just a bit of a trip, really.

His laughter is infectious, it seems, because soon Chris is giggling right along with him, pulling him into his arms as Sebastian winds his arms around Chris’s waist and buries his face in Chris’s neck again.

“So yeah,” Sebastian says dryly, once they’ve calmed down a little, “we’re probably not going to actually put this online, are we?”

Chris snorts into Sebastian’s hair. “Probably not, no. This was really fun but also really fucking weird.”

“So weird,” Sebastian agrees, then feels compelled to add, “but I kinda really enjoyed it, too.”

“I had an inkling you might have, yeah.” There’s a pause, before Chris asks, “So we’re totally gonna make more of these, right? Just for us?”

“Fuck yes.”

“God, I love you.”

And then Chris is pushing him back into the couch cushions, while in the background, on-screen Chris and Sebastian are getting increasingly noisy. It’s kind of odd, the notion of having sex to the soundtrack of themselves having sex, but it’s like, good odd. Sebastian and his body are fully on board with it. No one ever claimed actors were not slightly narcissistic creatures.

Read on AO3

#evanstan #rpf #chris evans x sebastian stan #chris evans #sebastian stan #smut #ao3 #my fic #paper-storm writes #mandie things #evanstan collab #we don't know what this is either #🤷🏻‍♀️#enjoy!

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bright-eyes-strawberry-lies · 4 years

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Annabeth “triflers need not apply” Chase

In my last post, I said “another Annabeth hot take” as if I’ve ever posted any of my musing about Annabeth’s character (the posts Percy’s Personal Sense Of Evil and Every Time Annabeth Is Mean To Percy In The Riordanverse] do not count) here on the blue hellscape.

Two disclaimers before I write this: the first is that PJO is my jam. I’ve read those books forward and back more than five times this year. HOO...I’ve read as a whole once; read Son of Neptune twice; and recently skipped through House of Hades specifically for the parts about Tartarus. Every series beyond that in the Riordanverse (Kane, Magnus, Apollo) have been woefully neglected by me as in I haven’t even cracked the spines on them.

The second disclaimer is that I don’t like Annabeth, she’s basically the Christian Gray of the Percy Jackson series. I ship Percy with everyone who isn’t Annabeth because I think he deserves to be happy. But some people were calling for meta so here are your hot takes, folks.

Annabeth is only with Percy because he’s the chosen one.

She disdained Percy from day one, thought that he was worth less than the mud on her shoes and made sure that he knew it. This was before she found out that he’s a child of Poseidon so you can miss me with the “well their parents are enemies” bullshit. After Percy got claimed, Annabeth invited herself on his quest because she’s all about obtaining personal glory and he couldn’t say no because he only had two friends at camp (Luke and Grover).

“He wouldn’t tell her the whole thing, but he said Annabeth wasn’t destined to go on a quest yet. She had to until...somebody special came to the camp.” [...] “Annabeth wants to think every new camper who comes through here is the omen she’s been waiting for.” [Luke] (TLT, pg 102)

“I’ve been waiting a long time for a quest, seaweed brain.” [Annabeth] (TLT, pg 147)

She was silent for a few more steps. “It’s just that if you died…aside from the fact that it would really suck for you, it would mean the quest was over. This may be my only chance to see the real world.” [Annabeth] (TLT, pg 169)

Well, that’s not the only reason she’s with Percy.

Chiron made Annabeth swear on the River Styx that she would try to keep Percy from danger. Which comes in handy during the Last Olympian, when she takes Ethan’s dagger for Percy (saving his life) but sucks for her because now her life is tied to his forever. Maybe that’s why she calls Percy crazy literally every time that he has a plan.

“Swear you will do your best to keep Percy from danger,” he insisted. “Swear upon the River Styx.”

“I-I swear it upon the River Styx,” Annabeth said.

Thunder rumbled outside. [SOM, pg 54)

Actually Annabeth is the creepy one.

Luke always refers to Annabeth as such: daughter, little sister, cousin, family. From the moment he saw her, it was a familial love for him. He constantly reminds her that they were a family and that he wants to be a family.

Annabeth, on the other hand, likes to call him “family” but she has a mad crush on Luke for the entire series that has got to be super weird for Luke. It was super weird for me, the reader. This girl can’t even hug Luke without panting like a bitch in heat (yeah, I said it, and I refuse to take it back).

“This is Luke,” Annabeth said, and her voice sounded different somehow. I glanced over and could’ve sworn she was blushing. (TLT, pg 84)

Annabeth blushed, like she always did when Luke was around. (TLT, pg 151)

Luke patted Grover’s head between his horns, then gave a goodbye hug to Annabeth, who looked like she might pass out. After Luke was gone, I told her, “You’re hyperventilating.” (TLT, pg 151)

It isn’t until Luke is literally on his death bed that Annabeth finally agrees that he’s a brother to her.

“Did you...” Luke coughed and his lips glistened red. “Did you love me?”

“You were like a brother to me, Luke,” she said softly. “But I didn’t love you.”

He nodded, as if he’d expected it. (TLO, pg 337/338)

NO SHIT HE EXPECTED IT. LUKE HAS BEEN AIMING FOR THIS FOR FIVE FUCKING YEARS. HIS ENTIRE LIFE IS ALL ABOUT FINDING A FAMILY THAT LOVES HIM (and equal rights for all demigods).

Then there’s the other creepy stuff

Remember that time that she stalked Percy and fans are like “well it’s so romantic!” You’re the same people who thought Edward watching Bella sleep without her knowledge or consent was sexy.

I thought I saw a shadow flicker across the glass – a humanlike shape. (SOM, pg 3)

As I stepped outside, I glanced at the brownstone building across the street. Just for a second I saw a dark shape in the morning sunlight – a human silhouette against the brick wall, a shadow that belonged to no one. Then it rippled and vanished. (SOM, pg 7)

[Percy realizes Annabeth has been stalking him] “Pretty much all morning.” She sheathed her bronze knife. “I’ve been trying to find a good time to talk to you, but you were never alone.” [ … ] “There’s no time to explain!” she snapped, though she looked a little red-faced herself. (SOM, pg 23)

For those of you who are like “well she was waiting for him to be alone!” First of all, bitch it’s called knocking on the door and asking to speak to someone like a normal human being. But if that isn’t good enough for you, HE WAS ALONE RIGHT AFTER HE WALKED OUT OF HIS BUILDING. Talk to him then.

But we all know the real reason she’s creeping outside Percy’s window. She’s a peeping tom. Anyone who has been around teenage boys (like, say, the girl who lived with teenage boys for five years) would know that the morning isn’t really the best time to be creeping outside a dude’s window unless you’re hoping for a show.

All she cares about is glory.

Look, we know she’s a glory hound. Annabeth is in this war for the sweet, sweet recognition. She doesn’t care about the unclaimed demigods, she doesn’t care about all of the minor demigods being shoved in one cabin (here’s more info on that). Annabeth is off in her own little world where she’s the only thing that matters.

Meanwhile, our boy Percy is fighting for his mom. And then he’s fighting for his best friend. He actually looks at Camp Half-Blood and goes “maybe this isn’t really right...” Yes, it takes him forever to get to the point where he’s like “Oh, Luke was right about everything” but he does get there.

And then there’s our sweet baby angel, Luke Castellan, fighting from the get-go for fair treatment. Because Luke has suffered his whole life (since he was literally an infant); because Hal Green died to save Luke; because Luke has spent five years in a cabin full of kids who are hurting and whose pain is entirely preventable; because at fourteen, he thinks of himself (and Thalia) as heroes but Hermes says that he needs to go on a quest to be a great hero, so Luke does and it turns out to be the worst mistake he made in his life (up until Kronos).

Which brings up a point, Luke always thought that they were heroes. For him, just being demigods and fighting monsters made them heroes. He didn’t need to go on a quest to prove himself to anyone. But for Annabeth, that is never enough. She needs to go bigger and bigger and bigger.

Glory and being better than everyone else...

Wow, here we are again talking about Annabeth and Percy’s relationship. I really wish we couldn’t, because I’ve already taken literal days to find every instance of Annabeth being a dick to Percy (in the PJO series) and writing them down, conveniently located here if you’re interested in reading it... But it just keeps coming up.

So, being better than everyone else. Where do I begin with that? How about the times that Annabeth thinks that the children of Demeter, yes Demeter the major goddess of the earth, are weak? Or the children of Aphrodite, you know, like Piper who charmspoke Gaea to sleep or Silena who charged into battle against a drakon are nothing but whisy washy airheads? Or really, anyone who isn’t booksmart like her. Like Percy, for instance.

Annabeth’s nickname for Percy means stupid. Every time she uses it, she’s calling him stupid. You know, when she doesn’t actually use the word stupid or idiot. She’s also very fond of calling Percy’s plans crazy, every time he has a plan, despite the fact that his plans have never failed. Now who’s crazy, Annabeth?

For real, though, she’s doing this because she wants to keep him in his place. Annabeth is shit for Percy’s self esteem. She constantly berates him for every little thing he does. She threatens to (and does) hit him on multiple occasions. Every time Percy says or does anything around Annabeth, he always thinks she’s going to punch me.

GUYS THAT ISN’T CUTE. GUYS REMEMBER HOW PERCY USED TO GET PUNCHED INTO UNCONSCIOUSNESS BY HIS STEPDAD?

Oh, and does everyone remember where Annabeth mocked Percy’s every choice in TLT but in Battle Of The Labyrinth where Annabeth is put in charge of the quest for the first time and she spends most of it freaking out and cracking under the pressure. It sounds like someone isn’t actually as good as she thought was.

I know I said I wasn’t going to talk about this but in Tartarus, Annabeth is scared of Percy. He’s stronger than even she knew. Percy just wakes up from passing out and kills Arachne before Annabeth can even move. That caught her by surprise. Percy manipulates poison in an attempt to kill the goddess of misery, who has just tricked them and is planning on killing them. Annabeth immediately shuts that down. Because Percy isn’t allowed to be that powerful. She also freaks out when Percy jumps blind over a 20ft chasm while holding her because she didn’t know he could do that.

And Percy is so used to not arguing with her (because she’s going to kick his butt, because it just isn’t worth it) that he just accepts it.

Her home life didn’t suck that bad.

Because I was just talking about Tartarus, Percy says that it smells like Gabe in Tartarus and Annabeth....laughs? She thinks he’s joking. She thinks he’s trying to cheer her up. Why would she think that when they’re in literal hell and Gabe abused Percy for years? Because she’s on a different plane of existence than everyone else.

Annabeth’s home life didn’t actually suck in the way that she’s told everyone it did. It sucked that she got attacked by monsters. It sucked that Arachne sent spiders to scare her for three nights.

Her parents don’t suck. Not even Athena. After ten years of hanging around all of these abused, neglected, traumatized people she finally got...what is it called? Oh yeah, some fucking perspective.

Frederick and Mrs. Chase (who doesn’t even have a name) did their best. There’s absolutely nothing unreasonable about Frederick not wanting Annabeth when she floated down from the heavens like the little Grinch she is. The dude had a few conversations with a woman and the next thing he knows, she’s dropping off a baby and won’t even help him raise it? Yeah, no thanks.

Either way, the entire family was getting attacked because of Annabeth’s presence in the house. So Mrs. Chase not letting her kids play with Annabeth? Makes total sense. It’s like quarantining the kid with chicken pox so that the rest don’t get it.

Fighting about how to handle being attacked regularly? Also makes total sense but the fact that Frederick and Mrs. Chase stayed together is like couple goals. They’re the real power couple of the series.

You know what else makes total sense? Thinking that Annabeth had a series of bad dreams about spiders because Mrs. Chase and her husband are mortals with mortal sight and cannot see divine shit.

Is all of this terribly confusing for a child? Yes. Does her family deserve to die or be vilified because she’s too young for logical thought? No.

Plus they kept asking her to come home. And when she finally did, she ran away again shortly after? She does this twice. Frederick literally flew into battle for her. She is so ungrateful for what she has (she’s rich, with a family who loves her. Literally her only problem is monster attacks).

Annabeth wasn’t homeless for that long

Look, Annabeth ran away from home between July 12, 2000 (her 7th birthday) and was at Camp Half-Blood by December 22, 2000 (which would have been Thalia’s 13th birthday). Her first couple of months were spent alone...unless you count Athena helping her fight monsters and guiding her towards Luke and Thalia.

Which directly breaks the Don’t Interfere Rule. You know, the one that Hermes used as an excuse for not helping his nine-year-old son while he was homeless for five years. Yeah. That one.

Luke and Thalia took really good care of her for those few months. Annabeth mentions that the three of them built shelters all over the place, and since Luke doesn’t mention shelters in his diary or any (pre-Annabeth) flashbacks, we can assume that they built those specifically because they adopted a little girl.

The whole “Family, Luke. You promised.” Is bullshit.

Here’s why. First of all, Luke was fourteen, a baby, barely out of puberty when he made that promise to be a family. He’s only ever wanted to be loved his entire life so that was him desperately trying to add another member to what he considered to be his family (Thalia never considered them family). He also never hurts her (see my post about holding the sky for more details).

Annabeth was with Luke and Thalia for a couple of months at maximum. Then Thalia dies. Luke and Annabeth are split up into different cabins so they cannot eat, sleep in the same room, or do activities together except during the off-season. Annabeth does her best to get into Luke’s pants because I don’t know what else to call it when you pant all over the person hugging you.

Luke also asks Annabeth to join him and be a family again for three whole books to which she repeatedly says no. His last attempt at being a family and keeping his promise happens literally before Kronos possesses him (after which, it is far too late to be a family because Luke barely exists anymore).

“He came under a flag of truce. He said he only wanted five minutes to talk. He looked scared, Percy. He told me Kronos was going to use him to take over the world. He said he wanted to run away, like the old days. He wanted me to come with him. [...] I told him no way. He got mad. He said...he said I might as well fight him right there, because it was the last chance I’d get.” [Annabeth] (TLO, pg 201).

Luke asks her to kill him because if he can’t escape Kronos and can’t have his family back, then Luke just doesn’t want to live anymore. Then he dies knowing that Annabeth doesn’t know that familial and platonic love are things so her “you’re my brother but I don’t love you” actually means that Luke dies thinking no one loves him. Probably why Luke immediately turned to Percy with his request for positive change. At least Luke can count on Percy to let him know that his entire life and death weren’t meaningless.

.Fin. Fucking finally.

#percabeth #annabeth chase #percy jackson #luke castellan #pjo #percy jackson series #riordanverse #long post #meta

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malecacidd · 4 years

Note

So... Do you have any fic recs? 👀👀👀

Um????? Vi?????? Yes absolutely?????? Ily????? Kfkzkdnsk 🥺🥺🥺 and aaaaaaa I'm sorry if you've read some of these but!!! Here are some recs 🥺🥺 aaaaa

Chaptered Fics

So I'm splitting this into categories between chaptered and one shots because I can. Also if I know the person has a Tumblr I'll be tagging them too kfkskfks

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Turn Your Back on Mother Nature by @siriuspiggyback

Ghosts aren't people. This is something that Klaus learned when he was small. Ghosts aren't people, because people are more than the hate and fear and anger inside of them.

But Ben is different. Isn't he?

/Evil Ben fic that brought me loads of pain/10 chapters/36k words/Rated teen and up with a warning of graphic violence/

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This Is the First Day of My Life by @dyll-pickless

There was a stretch of silence. “Fine,” he eventually said. “Don’t get yourself killed.”

Klaus grinned. “I won’t.”

-OR-

In attempting to find more information on his brother's death, Klaus Hargreeves gets caught up in a lot of trouble with some very powerful people.

/Mob au that I love very very much/14 chapters/40.5k words/Rated teen and up with a warning of graphic violence/

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Unfamiliar by @caedi

A sleep deprived Klaus accidentally stumbles into a difficult discussion with Ben. One that's been haunting them both for sixteen years.

This changes a few things for the 1963 apocalypse. Other things stay the same.

/A kind of rewrite of the last few episodes of s2 that broke my heart and I love very much/4 chapters/25.5k words/Rated mature with no archive warnings/

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What was Lost in the Portal by @is-jus-me

“Five? What happened?” Vanya asked.

“I- I don’t remember,”

Five managed to successfully return to 2019, but there was a problem, not only did he return to his 13 year old body, but he also lost his memories about the apocalypse and the commission.

Basically, life was shit.

/Amazing fic that I love and beta'd mdnsjd/5 out of 7 chapters posted/4.3k words/Rated general with no archive warning/

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last ones standing by penhaligon (on ao3)

Ben's only haunt options are the apocalypse or a cold dark slithering place, and he thinks that the universe must really have it out for him.

/idk how to describe this but basically, 'good' kfkdkdkd it's good/2 chapters/12.6k words/Rated general with no archive warnings/

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One shot timeeeee kfmskdks

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To Be Or Not To Be by AllThoseOtherWorlds (on ao3)

When Five took them back to the start of the week for a re-do, Ben wasn't expecting to suddenly find himself in Klaus's body, but sometimes things like that happen. Now he has to explain some things to their siblings, figure out Klaus's powers so they can switch back, and perhaps most importantly, convince himself and Klaus that switching back is the right thing to do.

/One of my favorite fics/7.7k words/Rated teen and up with no archive warnings/

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A quiet kind of hurt by @whatisthis-whatamidoing

Ben had been having a nice day, eating his ice cream and watching his brothers bicker. Until a friendly dog tried to say hello.

Ben has trauma surrounding animals

/Have you ever wanted pain and sibling bonding all in one fic? Read this jfkskd I love it/2.5k words/Rated teen and up with warning for graphic violence/

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don't forget your lines by @zontiky

Dave goes on a lot of dates, and a lot of people die.

/I can't believe I'm reccing this but it's actually good minus the bit of bave/murder mystery shitshow/2.7k words/Rated teen and up with a warning for major character death/

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the first day of the rest of our lives by hujwernoo (on ao3)

Klaus should really stop coming to the alley. It's not like it helps anyone. Everyone is probably dead, so all he's accomplishing is making himself feel shitty. This is the last time, he decides. After today, he'll stop coming.

Turns out he's real fucking lucky he didn't decide that earlier.

/s2 fix it or rewrite of Klaus' arc in which he finds Allison at the alley and I love/5.2k words/Rated teen and up with no archive warnings/

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Two Presents by @evelinaonline

How does one surprise their dead brother that follows them around everywhere with a Christmas gift? Well, Klaus better figure it out soon, because Christmas is right around the corner and Ben isn't going anywhere.

/GENUINELY IN MY TOP 3 FAVORITE FICS GO READ RN/2.5k words/Rated general with no archive warnings/

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Life After Death, Literally by Tremble (on ao3)

Ben Hargreeves is a lot of things. He’s a brother, an ex-superhero and now an ex-ghost. He was dead, but he “lived” over ten years as a ghost. Becoming a living human, or as human as somebody with eldritch horrors living just under the skin can be, is going to take a bit of an adjustment period.

AKA 5 times Ben forgot he was alive +1 time he remembered.

/The cutest most wholesome shit I've ever read/5k words/Not rated with no archive warnings/

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The Dead Make Better Company Than The Living Sometimes by Scarlet_Nin (on ao3)

“This is a bad idea.”

“You’re such a worrywart, Benny!” Klaus squints at him, shifting on his feet at the entrance of a graveyard. He can hear the faint howls of screams in his ears, the coldness seeping into his bones, freezing him into place. “It’s gonna be fine. As easy as a piece of cake. Hey, you know what? We should go out and eat cake after this. You love cake.”

Ben shakes his head. “Look at yourself! You don’t even want to do this, so let’s leave.”

Klaus glances down at him, sexy boots with heels and his favorite fur trimmed jacket. “I look fabulous. Don’t know what you mean.”

“You’ve been standing here for the past hour, trembling and trying to talk yourself up to take a single step further and yet you’re still standing here. Let’s go home, Klaus.”

Yeah, no. Not happening. He's here to prove something. Leaving now would be a waste of time. It would prove Daddy dearest right and Klaus hates that thought more than what he's about to do. If it all goes well, Five and the others would stop being so stressed and he'd earn himself some browney points in family bounding. Easy peasy.

Or not. Because ghosts in a graveyard are like rabid dogs fighting over a juicy steak.

/The summary is so long I'm so sorry nfjsjdjs/This fic is amazing pls read/8.2k words/Not rated with no archive warnings/

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So, with nothing else to do, Ben drifted. He just didn't expect to be pulled back into where most people go to enjoy their afterlife.

Take Me Home (I've Lost Myself) by @malecacidd

~^~

Reginald dies and god pulls Ben up to let them talk.

/FUCK IT I'M DOING A SELF PROMO BC THIS FIC GOT LESS ATTENTION THAN I WANTED AND I GENUINELY LIKE IT KCJZJDMSMS/2.8k words/Rated teen and up with no archive warnings/

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Okay that's all I'm doing because this is getting long JFJZJDNZNDNSKSK but 🥺🥺🥺 I hope you like these!!

#these are all honestly so good kfkdndnd i love them #fic recs #tua #the umbrella academy #ask #asks

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2o2o-kit · 4 years

Text

An American’s Thoughts on Horrible Histories Songs

Born 2 Rule: Iconic, really set the stage for Horrible Histories, not my favorite George III song though that prize goes to Hamilton, (also I was always taught George III was mad in an angry way)

Wives of Henry VIII: This song walked so Six can run, still iconic

Making a Mummy: Kind of forgettable, but if we are going by the pattern as seen in the first two, I predict the next big history musical will be about making mummies

The Tudors: I don’t know why but I love this song’s intro, but I find the dance moves cringe worthy

Georgian Lady: It’s great when you can read along to it, but Martha is still iconic

I’m a Knight: I love the whole Monty Python inspiration, this always makes me smile, just pure wholesome knight energy, one of my favorite season 1 songs

Caveman Love: It gets better the more you listen to it

It’s Not True: Probably my least favorite Horrible Histories song, still better than most songs on the radio

The Plague: The plague was made for musical theatre, besides this check out Spamalot and Something Rotten

British Things: Drags on a bit, but haha Britain, you are not perfect, (but America is far from perfect)

We are Greek: It’s king boring, but lyrics are still pretty clever

Burke and Hare: I’m not a fan of this TBH, maybe it’s because I’m not a huge fan of true crime and stuff like that, it’s not that catchy either

Literally: Nothing like an 80s rock parody, it’s also one of the funniest songs

Charles II: This was the first HH song I listened to and I’m glad, because it’s a banger, and this is probably the closest you will get to a kid friendly Eminem

Spartan Musical: This is so camp and just you have to watch to understand

WWII Girls: Katy Wix needs to be in more songs, I love the costumes in this

George IV: I’m obsessed with this one, Jim’s vocals in this are perfection, definitely one of my favorite of the whole series, I wish I could belt like that

Blackbeard: The acting in this is perfection, I still laugh while watching it

Victorian inventions: I’m not a big fan of this type of music, but it’s still funny

Hieroglyphics: Idk why Mat did a Texas accent, and I’m not sure but it’s not bad, but it’s not as great as the other songs

Cowboys: The accents are good but I could go without all the farts

Boudicca: This is an inspiration

Funky Monks: I’m not a big fan of this one, it’s funny but I wish they had more singing in this, but Terry is great as always

Pachacuti: At first I was bit nervous to watch it because of the brown face, and yes it’s in there and I also thought it would be too cheesy but that’s the point and makes it so much fun, also what’s a northern accent

Dick Turpin: For most people it’s the guyliner that makes this a thirst trap, for me it’s all the tricorn hats 😍. When I first watched this video I recently developed my tricorn fetish and this song was just... The music to this is great too, I listen to this daily. And imagine me learning that this thirst trap’s name is Dick

Monarchs: Iconic, super helpful, now I can name all the English monarchs, thanks

William Wallace: Better than Braveheart, seems like a lot of fun to film

Work! Terrible Work: Hey look theatre reference, this so is definitely not a mood booster, but those sideburns (and I’m not really into sideburns)

Ra ra Cleopatra: Martha is killing it, and I love all the Lady Gaga references

Richard III: Thanks for talking about the horrors of Tudor Propaganda and the lyrics in this are amazing

Evil Emperors: If you claim your bad, don’t make such a catchy song that can easily be confused as another thirst trap, love the parody and Caligula and Nero and some of my favorite HH characters

Suffragettes: This song proved how hard these ladies worked, also I want to sing this song with others, who’s in?

Ain’t Stain Alive: Okay just like Pachacuti, I’m sure this song can’t work today, but it’s great, so catchy and the screams, also the behind the scenes of this is iconic

Age of Stone: I like how it explains the time periods but I’m not really a big fan of how it was presented

English Civil War: The choreography is on point, Lawry needed to be in more songs and I love the song they parodied, it’s Cool from West Side Story

Celtic Boast Battle: I don’t know, I find it a bit too much but the ending is perfection

RAF Pilots: Now I’m not big on war history, epically WWII, but song is perfection, I love the coloring used for this, the music is just awesome, and this along with The Captain from Ghosts and Molly McIntire are proving the WWII is gay

Nature Selection: I’ve been using this phrase a lot during the pandemic,

The Thinkers: Alright, no strong opinions

It’s a New World: A jam, love the shade of how the pilgrims treated the natives, and it’s a great parody altogether, also I need a New New Castle now

Mary Seacole: So catchy I love it, and the dancing is great. I wish they didn’t cut out that one lyric about Florence because that’s important

Victoria and Albert: It’s kind of slow, but I can see why others like it, maybe it’s just because I’m alone

Blue Blooded Blues: I don’t really like Blues music, even though I’ve lived in cities known for their blues, but James Cape™️, GAAAYYYY!!!

The Luddites: Definitely one of my favorites, I love the cinematography, the costumes are my type, and nothing like historical heavy metal, ironic right, and Jim has the vocal range

The Borgia Family: I love everything about this, the music, the accents, costumes, this is better than the Showtime series, wish Ben got a solo in this song though, (also is it just me or do the Borgias remind you of the Trumps expect the Borgias are more like able)

Mary I: It’s okay, Sarah in this is great and it’s a great parody but I always thought of Mary having a deeper voice (I know weird)

William Shakespeare and the Quills: I love Shakespeare, but I’m not a big fan of this type of music, also I low key wish Shakespeare was sexy in this one

Georgian Navy: Please forgive my star spangled ass, but I’m not a fan of the British military during the Georgian era, and yes I know Nelson didn’t really fight in the American Revolution, but I’m not a big fan of war history

Flame: Will get stuck in your head, but who cares it’s an awesome parody, Jesse Owens in amazing, we love Jim’s Nero, and Mat you said you were all nude (I feel cheated)

Death’s Favorite Things: Hilarious, and a mood for me

Rosa Parks: Now Rosa’s story is something we get drilled in our heads in America, which is good, this song is so catchy and I love the costumes, but the ending did say ‘segregation was ended in America,’ but technically...

Vikings and Garfunkel: Aww so peaceful,

Charles Dickens: I love the music on this and the cinematograph, but there is something about it that I’m not a big fan of it, but I’m not sure what

Crassus Minted: A freaking underrated banger, just like the real Crassus

Joan of Arc: I’m sorry but this song is a bit cringe worthy but still way better than the new seasons

Alexander the Great: I mean is there any other song that can truly depict Alex

Owain Glynwr: Wish they had more Welsh history on the show but Tom Jones parody I never knew I needed

Transportation: The dancing in this is amaze, and I’m obsessed with Ben’s accent in this, how is his Midwestern accent better than mine, and I have a Midwestern accent, (stop making me like Henry Ford!) and I love whenever they do musical parodies

Henry VII: This song makes me want to be Henry VII, he made the monarchy great again

Matilda Stephen and Henry: There are more ABBA references in this than a production of Mamma Mia, and it’s brilliant,

Australia: I’m surprised they got away with saying Hellhole in this, but still very catchy, low key wish Thomas sang this in Ghosts

Cousins: It’s silly and I like it

Love Rats: Lyrics make me want to remain single, video is having me crush on actors that are old enough to be my parents

Final: Supersweet, but I can only watch it once because it makes me emotional

#horrible histories #my opinion #history

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hotcoffeecoldmornings · 4 years

Text

(This shit is long so bear with me.)

Can’t Eat, Can’t Sleep, Reach for the Stars

I haven’t felt this way in awhile. This ‘can't eat, can't sleep, reach for the stars, over the fence, world series kind of love.’

It’s hard to describe. The last time I was all-consumed like this by a TV show and a ship, that TV show was The 100, that ship was Clexa, and my world was, quite honestly, turned upside down by it.

I used the first two seasons of The 100 as background noise as I wrote my Master’s Thesis in 2015. To be honest, I didn’t really know exactly what was happening until Bodyguard of Lies (an episode anyone reading this post probably remembers well) came on. And a passionate kiss between two world leaders left me speechless and shocked. I was blindsided by it, unaware that that kiss would be the beginning of not only finding myself, but also accepting myself, and then finding a chosen family I never knew that I needed because of it.

There’s been alot of (okay, not a lot, but more) f/f ships on TV since then. Maggie and Alex. Nicole and Waverly. Elena and Syd. Kat and Adena. Anissa and Grace. Stef and Lena. Karolina and Nico. And the list goes on… While each of these ships is equally important, and each one represents another push towards more inclusive storytelling, there was never a ship that hit me as hard as Clarke and Lexa did.

Until now.

Harold, They’re Lesbians

Gay. Witches.

Motherland: Fort Salem said the words. And I fucking came running.

Okay, so it took me a few weeks… Thank you, twitter timeline, for finally getting my ass on board. It’s not that I didn’t want to start the show. It’s that my anxiety-ridden brain had other plans for me in mid-March. Like spending the majority of my time researching a global pandemic and then crawling into a depression hole because of it… Or something like that.

But nonetheless, I’m here now. And I’m fucking staying.

I knew I’d love this show. The concept of witches peppered with the idea that sexuality is irrelevant is honestly my one and only weakness. So I went into episode one with high hopes. And I sure as hell was not disappointed.

Episode 1 gave me even more than I could’ve asked for. We meet three uniquely powerful individuals, who all come from three uniquely interesting backgrounds. Abigail Bellweather, born into a lineage of the most powerful and elite witches Fort Salem has ever seen. Tally Craven, the last one standing in her family’s long-line of service, selflessly choosing to say the oath when she didn’t technically have to. And Raelle Collar, who has an unparalleled set of powers, combining her mother’s Christo-Pagan ways with those of the seeds learned at Fort Salem.

Rounding out that already brilliant cast is Scylla Ramshorm, the ‘sexy weird’ Necro who may or may not be evil (but we love her all the same). General Sarah Alder, the original witch who signed the Salem Accord, selling out every future witch to the United States Army, and whose ego quite often gets the best of her. And Anacostia Quartermaine, the Bellweather Unit’s Drill Sergeant who has a peculiar fondness (and leniency) for Raelle Collar.

The fact that this television show is entirely female centered (like, we’re talking 60 seconds of male screen time in the pilot), is what separates this show from most. Men exist in the world of Fort Salem as characters to exclusively propel the female leads forward, which is a stark contrast to the majority of shows right now. And not only is the entire main cast female, the main lead is gay. And honestly, the sexuality of every character on the show is questionably debatable as well. Except for Abigail, who quite clearly is into any and all men, and Tally, who grew up on a Matrifocal Compound and ended up in Fort Salem as a virgin. Which, of course, no shade to her, but it did strike me as odd when Abigail immediately assumed Tally’s virgin-ness when growing up in an all-female world was brought up.

So let’s start there, shall we?

The Heteronormative Narrative (or not…)

Something I did find puzzling about Motherland: Fort Salem (and the only thing, really) is how they portray sexuality, relationships, and love. In regards to sexuality, Eliot Laurence, the creator and executive producer, has been incredibly forward in interviews with the narrative that ‘your sexual preference doesn’t matter in this world.’ Which I appreciate to the fullest, trust me. But pardon my slight hesitation when I hear that line, because I think we’ve all been burned by it once before.

Motherland: Fort Salem has done a tremendous job of this. They’ve allowed characters to own their sexuality without question. It was never a thing when Raelle started dating Scylla. At Beltane, everyone went off with whomever the dance paired them with - even if that meant the same gender, and even if that meant three or four or five of them. Sexuality, in regards to same-sex partners, is never a character arc in this show, and it’s never there to create a plot point.

HowEVER, there were a few things I noticed that confused that fact.

Like I said about Abigail in the very first episode, when the Bellweather Unit is meeting for the first time, why was Abigail so quick to question Tally’s virginity after learning she comes from a Matrifocal Compound? If there are no heteronorms in the world of Motherland: Fort Salem, then why is it assumed that losing your virginity is related to relations with a man? Even though Tally is (well… was) a virgin, why would that question be brought up? If roles were reversed and it was Raelle living on the Matrifocal Compound, the conversation would’ve gone strikingly different, and it would’ve supported this heteronormative narrative that I thought we were trying to avoid. I’m just going to blame this one line on how badly Abigail wants the D, so sleeping with a woman wouldn’t even cross her mind.

But then what about the idea of this ‘five-year marriage contract’? It’s simply about producing a child, so I assume a woman could never have that sort of thing with another woman, and that those women could never add to their lineage (unless they entered into a five-year marriage contract simply to reproduce). Doesn’t this, alone, signify a heteronormative world without even meaning to do so? While they accept LGBTQ+ relationships, how do they actually fit into the society and culture that this show has created? Wouldn’t the gay witches be seen as almost inadequate in carrying on the gene if they don’t have a child? (AmI just thinking too much into this...?)

But then again, the whole concept of ‘love’ in Fort Salem is rather insignificant itself. As Gerit mentions, no one is supposed to spend their life with just one person. Witches are committed to one another in five-year partnerships to reproduce, and then that’s it. So in a way, I understand that nobody, no matter what their sexuality is, really gets to experience this fairytale ending that we’re used to seeing in a (*cough* heterosexual) ship on TV. And in a way, I also think that’s what makes this show all the more fascinating. Eliot Laurence gave everyone a level playing field by just removing the idea of a happily ever after altogether. In Laurence’s world, witches are meant to train and fight and die for their country. Love is their weakness. But what’s so compelling about that is even though love is their weakness, he made sure that love also manifests into their greatest strength.

From what I’ve seen in interviews for Laurence, every single thing has a purpose. So I’m quick to let this go, and see where he takes us. He’s been building this world inside his head for nine years, so I know that there’s so much more to this story than what can be told in a 10-episode season.

But Back to the Lesbians

Anyway, back to love. Specifically gay love. I wish I could put into simple words my obsession with Raelle and Scylla.

From the incredible chemistry that Taylor Hickson and Amalia Holm share on-screen together to the directors and writers who’ve portrayed their love story so magically, Raelle and Scylla are truly something special. They’ve taken the place of a ship this queer fandom lost when Lexa was killed. It’s a ship that you want to hate, because every part of this story tells me to hate Scylla. She’s Spree. She’s vindictive. She’s dangerous. Yet every part of my brain tells me to love her. And to love them together.

I don’t like easy stories. I want stories that make the ending worth it. I want hardships and pain and hurt and work when it comes to love. Which is why I like the story of Raelle and Scylla. There was a spark between them in their very first scene together- a spark you could feel through the TV. It was believable and real. They come from similar backgrounds of loss and solitude, and that’s what originally bound them together. And over the next seven episodes, we watched their relationship grow. We saw their vulnerabilities, their growth, their passion. But now we’re going to see the hardship. The pain, the anger, the betrayal.

I appreciate that they’re not skimping on telling any part of their story. The two are special together, and so far, this show has proved that.

She’s Special

I want to break down Raelle Collar before bringing up anything else, because, well, obviously she’s the main character, but she’s also got a lot going on. The fact that Raelle channels her power through something other than the typical ‘seed’ is something that will be of importance to why she’s so powerful. Petra Bellweather, herself, claims that Raelle’s mom, Willa, used unconventional methods that delivered incredible results. “She was the fixer every unit wanted to deploy with.”

While all witches in Basic Training are learning about utilizing their extra set of vocal cords to create magic songs, Raelle can do it in a way that’s reminiscent of where she grew up- Chippewa Cession. In the very first episode, she makes note that her family was there before it became a Cession. Aka, before the land was given to the Chippewa tribe in exchange for their magic.

Raelle comes from a line of witches that all have more unique abilities than what’s taught at Basic Training. She uses a combination of Native American spirituality/Christo-Paganism skills during her days at Fort Salem, which brings up questions (and judgment) from other witches. It seems as though that kind of magic was the way witches used to do things before Sarah Alder released her song into the world and created a vocalizing army with it. Raelle’s peers look disgusted when they see her still using the same ways witches once did. It’s particularly noticeable when she heals people, and recites Matthew 7:7, “Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.” The entire theme of the Book of Matthew, in regards to Christianity, is about prayer. Asking and receiving. That God will provide you with what’s needed, and nothing more. But when it comes to Paganism, it’s about the law of attraction and return in our universe. It outlines that there is no life without balance - that all prayers can be answered, but they’ll be answered with things that are taken from elsewhere. All prayers almost have a consequence. Just like all magic has a consequence.

Raelle’s power, at least what she knows of it up until now, is based on a consensual balance, bringing the theme of Paganism’s Matthew 7:7 into the type of witchcraft she practices. She can heal someone, but what she heals them from will be transferred onto her. Balance. Consequence.

Bringing General Sarah Alder back into this, this is the same type of magic that she traded for back in the 1700’s when she granted the Chippewa Tribe the entire length of the Mississippi River. In exchange, she gained the magic that could keep her eternally young. But just like the magic that Raelle does, this age defying practice has consequences too, and requires balance. Every 50-60 additional years that General Alder adds on to her endless life, a young witch must be sacrificed to take on those years, and must stand by General Alder the rest of her short-lived life.

But where does the balance go?

Adil is such a great addition to the cast because he sheds a light on something so crucially ignored on campus. All magic has balance. This is teased throughout the season, like when General Alder hits turbulence on her way to The Hague and jokes (but not really jokes), “I assume I have one of you to blame for that.” Or how Raelle soaks up her ‘patients’ illness. But it’s not truly smacked in our faces until Adil says it.

As Abigail is flaunting her ability to *one day* “grind iron into ore and mountains into dust,” Adil drops a truth bomb on her. “All that weather you fight with has a cost. Floods. Failing crops. Famine. Every war, people starve.” She’s quick to reply that the good they do far outweighs the bad. But to who? Certainly not to Adil and his people. Meeting him is going to give our recruits a serious insight into just how consequential their ‘work’ can be. He’s going to play a crucial role in realizing how manipulative and egotistical General Alder has been.

Not only is weather an issue, but plagues. “Like the one attacking my sister.” Adil and Khalida come into the storyline because Khalida is sick with a deathly black webbing wrapped around her body. When they first make it to the Military Outpost (somewhere in the dessert between Russia and China?), the Soldier who meets them at the gate yells, “they’re here.” So were they expecting them?

Raelle eventually is the one who heals Khalida, (by using her Christo-pagan means) but instead of taking up the illness like it usually does, instead, it infects the giant mushroom that Raelle touched earlier.

The balance of Mother Mushroom.

I go back and forth between theories for the giant mushroom growing under Fort Salem. But today, I’m convinced the mushroom is attached to General Alder’s vitality. And consequently, the entire vitality of Fort Salem as well. In one episode, Berryessa reminds us that all life on campus is directly connected to Alder. And if what Scylla says in My Witches, that “life becomes death, which becomes life again,” is relative to the life on campus and how General Alder parallels that, then this theme of balance throughout the series is more prominent than we realize.

The giant mushroom living under campus is clearly important. It has hands and replicates faces and takes on diseases and Izadora is not a fan of anyone touching it. So yes, you could say this fungi is a main character now.

But. Why?

“In the kingdom of plants, mushrooms occupy the underworld. Nothing ever really dies.” Mushrooms have an entire underground network of language to one another. And they are responsible for the breakdown and decomposition of death so that organic matter can become something else. Necros have an obvious connection to this ecological process too, so they must have a connection to the continuous process that General Alder goes through to support and sustain life on her campus.

I think that the “Mother Mycelium” signifies each and every consequence that Fort Salem has accumulated. It holds the hurt and death and pain and regret of everything General Alder has created. And now that the Mushroom is infected with whatever plague Khalida had, I think it’s going to wreak havoc on Fort Salem. Magic is based on balance, and I think massive consequences are coming to make up for years of disparity.

One last thing on my mushroom-thoughts, is when Helen Graves said “the dead make excellent eyes and ears.” An underground network of mushrooms all connected to recently dead organisms would certainly be a great way to gain insight too. Scylla mentions that she needs something recently dead to grow her deathcap, so does this Mushroom need to be constantly “fed” with death to continue the creation of life?

Does Alder know about that? Are the mass-murders that the Spree are doing related to this? Killing hundreds of people at a time would definitely be a good way to keep the mushroom o’ death fed. Is Alder behind the Spree!?

Sexy Weird

Speaking of Spree... Can we talk Scylla now? First of all, what the hell is this girl’s timeline? When we first meet her, she’s a cadet (second year) in War College already, meaning she would’ve had to enlist on Conscription Day the year before Raelle. Yes? In Mother Mycelium, we see that she *might* (still don’t believe it) have been the person behind that first Spree attack on Conscription Day of this year (so when Raelle, Tally, and Abigail enlisted), so was she at Basic Training for an entire year before deciding to become Spree? Did she enlist knowing that she would eventually be Spree? Does this ever get addressed in the show?

Since we’re here, I might as well say there’s no way Scylla did that. I’ll never believe it. And I’m using my one semester of Greek Mythology in college to tell you why (who knew that class would eventually come in handy)

In My Witches, when Tally, Abigail, and Glory first meet Scylla, Tally makes it clear that ‘Scylla’ is a Greek name. Okay. Greek. Cool. Mythology. Let’s go. I already knew that Eliot Laurence doesn’t waste any minute of screen time when it comes to plot development and storytelling, so my meta brain did a little digging.

In Greek Mythology, Scylla was a sea-monster who haunted the rocks of a very narrow strait, opposite of the whirlpool of Charybdis. The monster’s purpose was to lead ships and boats towards the whirlpool, which was lethal to all who attempted to pass. Scylla was used to lure boats towards Charybdis, but was never meant for actually destroying them. Scylla was a fear tactic, not a murderous monster. In poetry, it’s often said that Scylla isn’t a monster at all, just born into a monstrous family. In conclusion (from my 4 months of Freshman-level Greek Mythology and a little refreshment on Google) I think Scylla is simply being used to lure people to the Spree, but not actually doing the mass-murdering that is being shown in the episode.

What I do know is that Scylla Ramshorn is absolutely Amalia Holm. Mainly because I refuse to accept that Raelle is falling for the red head (sorry, red head). But also because at the end of the Pilot, when Scylla (in red head disguise) looked into the mirror, the balloon was her reflection, and it followed everything that she did. But in other scenes, when Scylla’s face is the normal Scylla face, she can see her own reflection. So the redhead girl is unimportant. Plus, IMDB says she never appears again this season...

We Are The Spree

As much as I hate to believe that Raelle’s mom (or Aunt!) is alive and leading the Spree, the connections between the two entities do add up. Both (Spree and Collar’s) are against the authority and power that the Witch Army has over populations of witches. They’re both against General Sarah Alder. I believe they both use spoken word magic rather than just vocalized magic. When the Spree carry out their attacks, they’re whispering words under their breath, not singing any song. Which is reminiscent of how the Collar’s do magic. Additionally, it would make sense as to why the Spree would want Scylla to bring them Raelle. And I still can’t get over the conversation between Raelle and Tally when Raelle explains her family’s combat charm. “A bowerbird’s foot. They love anything blue.”

Blue? Why. WHY.

Maybe Willa Collar was captured by the Spree? Or the Aunt was? Or the Spree needs Raelle to heal someone?

One last weird very unthought out theory goes with the other Biblical verse Raelle recites - Isaiah 43:2. “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” The fact that all Spree attacks have happened with something to do water- in the snow, at the pool, on a cruiseship. And the fact that the last line of that verse is literally, “you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” This type of witchcraft has to relate to how the Spree does magic. Right??

Now I’m re-talking myself into the fact that the Collar’s might be somehow leading Spree...

But who’s ‘we’?

If the Collar’s are in charge of Spree then this next theory would actually check out.

Anacostia has been a little more over-bearing with Raelle than any of the other girls. On multiple occasions, she’s said how Raelle is gifted. In fact, they all have. Even Abigail in Hail Beltane mentions that “Raelle didn’t go outside of canon, she’s naturally gifted.” They all know she’s gifted. It would make sense if the Collar’s were the ones running Spree, and that Anacostia, aka. General Alder’s head bitch, was sent to protect Raelle from ever joining them. Alder wants to capitalize on the powers that Raelle has, and keep them in the Witch Army.

But I also think Anacostia could be playing General Alder. There have been too many times where she stares at Alder just a little bit too intently, and I can’t stop thinking that she might be in some sort of rebellious group too. Maybe a certain cell of Spree?

Because you can’t deny that Anacostia has also taken in interest in Scylla, particular to keep her away from Raelle. When Anacostia first caught them flying high on Salva, she told Scylla to stay away from Raelle, and it seemed as though she (tried) to use some sort of coercion magic while doing so. When Anacostia then saw them together at the Bellweather wedding, she almost sounded shocked, “I expressly told you to stay away from her.” Did Anacostia attempt coercion magic on Scylla and it didn’t work? And if she did, why didn’t it work?

That entire exchange felt odd yet familiar. Like the two have history. “Your name wouldn’t have been on the list. You’re not supposed to be here.” Particularly the “you’re not supposed to be here.” Did Anacostia know about the attack on the Bellweather’s? And did she think it would be threatened with Scylla there? Or did she know that Scylla was supposed to bring Raelle to the Spree at 6pm. And was sent to make sure Scylla never completed that task.

I found it interesting that Anacostia was never seen fighting off the balloons like every other Witch was when they appeared. And her being at the actual wedding felt odd too. Especially if she’s General Alder’s right-hand (wo)man, because last time I checked, Alder and Petra Bellweather weren’t on the greatest terms. In fact, none of the General’s are on great terms with Alder.

Since we’re now on Bellweather season...

Camarilla. No, not Carmilla.

There’s certainly a second threat in this show. And they were the ones behind the attack at the Bellweather’s. Not only has this already been proven by Jessica Sutton on Twitter (lols) but the clues were literally all there. They didn’t use any magic to fight. They had to use a mechanized sound machine to stop Abigail and Petra from using their powers. Then they covered themselves with gasoline and lit themselves on fire before the mother-daughter duo blew them away. It wasn’t Spree. But it was meant to look like Spree. And I think the balloons were simply a distraction, so all efforts and power would be outside fighting off the balloons while the civilian waiter’s could attack.

But who is doing this?

It’s been brought up that there are alot of humans who don’t agree with the Witch Army that Alder leads. Even the President of the United States is hesitant about them. “You, too, are bound by rule of law to the will of the American people, who have elected me to represent their interests and protect them. Don’t you forget it. Or you may find yourself reminded.” Then Tally gets confronted later in that episode by a civilian who says, “It’s witches who are committing these attacks. It’s your kind of people .” And then even later in the series, there’s talk of a “growing debate in congress to revoke the Accord and disband the army.” So you could say there are definite opinions about this Army by civilians.

In A Biddy’s Life, there’s a shot when Raelle and Scylla are in the room with weapons once used to kill witches. There’s an undeniably important shot of the Camarilla Scythe. Camarilla, itself, is defined as a small group of people acting as private advisers to a ruler or politician with a shared and nefarious purpose to carry out secret plots.

Since civilians are the ones that are most opposed to the Witch Army, it makes sense that maybe the President, herself, is the one behind these attacks. She’s trying to take down the most Elite of the Witches (the Bellweather’s), hence inhibiting the Army from being as successful as it’s been in the past. And what better way than to kill the most elite witches of child-bearing age.

While this theory checks out, I can’t help but to also think that Petra Bellweather could be behind the attacks. I know, it’s a stretch, (specifically because it’s her own family that’s being targeted) but I do love that ‘good powers, bad people’ trope. And what better way to make sure nobody questions your efforts if you’re the last one they’d suspect? Petra Bellweather has been itching to boot Alder from head witch honcho for awhile. Since killing Bellweather’s is the ultimate attack against witches, this would be a great strategy to showcase that Alder is inept in dealing with these enemies, creating a fall in power. And eventually, a rise in another. A Bellweather.

Okay, I know what you’re all probably thinking. “So you’re saying that she wanted her own daughter killed!?” Not necessarily. When you watch Bellweather Season, and specifically the wedding scenes, they put an insane emphasis on timing. And I don’t believe that that’s just because of Scylla trying to get Raelle out of there by 6pm. When you watch the sequence back, the Bellweather Unit was supposed to be having their interview with the Dean of War College, starting at 5:30ish. If the interview took a good bit, say 30-45 minutes, this would strategically put Abigail not in the line of fire (aka Charvel’s room) at 6pm when they struck.

But on the complete other hand, Abigail was supposed to be up with Charvel at that time helping her get ready. Meaning if it wasn’t Petra Bellweather, someone perfectly timed both Bellweather’s of childbearing age to conveniently be in the same place at the same time.

Then the fact that Scylla was meant to leave with Raelle at 6pm (the exact moment the waiter’s and balloons struck), can’t go unnoticed. Did they want her to leave with Raelle at 6pm because the Spree knew about the attack? Did someone warn them? Does this explain why Anacostia was shocked to see Scyalla. “You’re not supposed to be here.” Why wasn’t she supposed to be there????

I’m just going to tap out of this theory now.

But One More Thing

This might be a totally aggressive theory, and I have to credit the initial spark of this idea to my girlfriend, because during my 67th rewatch of this show, she brought up something I’d never thought of before. She asked me what Scylla’s purpose of attending the wedding was, and if the person she was supposed to bring to Penelope Road at 6pm really was Raelle?

This got thinkING. What if it was someone else???

When you look back at all the times Scylla spends talking to her balloon mirror, they never actually say Raelle’s name. Sure, we’re meant to believe that Raelle is the obvious target. But what if that’s a cover?? What if she’s using Raelle to infiltrate something else and get to someone else??

It would make sense to use Raelle to target Abigail instead- an elite Bellweather. Like I said, this is a very unlikely theory but it would definitely be a shock to literally everyone (except my girlfriend apparently)...

Has the entirety of the show been leading us down a path to distract us from something else going on!? With every other ounce of brilliance here, I wouldn’t even doubt it.

In Conclusion

I went into this show expecting to be seen and represented as a queer woman, but what I actually got was so much more. What I got from this show is the realization that me being queer doesn’t have to have anything to do with me being a woman at all. My strength, and will, and mistakes, and growth, and grace, and support, and passion, are what make me a woman. Each of our stories are deserving enough to be told just because we are women.

I’ve struggled with that fact my entire life - my womanhood.

Femininity, feminism, and female empowerment are all things I’ve only recently connected with. I was raised in the culture of traditional gender roles. My dad went to work and my mom stayed home. It’s not that I was necessarily taught that men and women must occupy those roles; it’s just that’s all I knew. To even further confuse my adolescent existentialism, not only was my mother a stay-at-home mom, she was also in the Marine Corps. And she never really understood the fact that not all women are as strong as she is.

My mom’s a badass, don’t get me wrong. She’s one of my hero’s. She came from a family who didn’t have much, and after realizing that she couldn’t afford to go to college, she enlisted instead. Six years later, she went to Penn State on a full-ride. She’s worked for every ounce of success that she’s seen, and she’s worked her ass off for it. But because of that, she struggles with the idea of feminism.

I can’t blame her too much. I understand the mindset she’s coming from. Growing up with that being instilled in my mind was hard though. Because it was expected that I, too, grow up to be a strong independent woman.

I graduated in the predominantly male industry of agriculture (I want to be a farmer, okay!?). All through college, grad school, and post-grad school, I worked on farm after farm after farm. And it was there that I was introduced to the idea of toxic masculinity. I tolerated comments that I won’t even say out loud. I’ve “accidentally” been touched in more ways than I care to count. And what I hate the most about it all, is that I fucking tolerated it. I’d laugh it off, and then I’d walk away, mortified at what I’d actually just put up with. And while by no means do I blame my upbringing and home life on this, I do blame the upbringing and home life on the female characters I saw on television. If Brooke Davis was constantly and overly sexualized in high school then I guess I was supposed to, too. Right??

Sure, I still hear comments that I wish I didn’t. But I’m also surrounded by people and characters who taught me to never put up with the shit I once did. Female characters are portraying a storyline that people take more seriously now. They’re persevering. And that jumps off the screen in Motherland: Fort Salem.

It’s taken me a while to realize how Raelle and Scylla have affected me as much as Clakre and Lexa did (two characters who literally awakened my sexuality). But I think I get it now.

I love both Raelle and Scylla. Each one. Individually. As witches. As warriors. As females. As humans. As strong female characters. So, in a way, watching this show has awakened something else in me that I’ve also been suppressing all along. My femininity. My strength. My perseverance.

Sure, Raelle and Scylla are my favorite ship right now, but it wasn’t them being together that made me fall in love with this show. Oddly enough, it was them being apart. It’s the fact that each one stands on her own as a unique and beautifully complicated story. And it’s the fact that I, too, am deserving of a beautifully complicated story.

Last Section, I Swear

Motherland: Fort Salem is a magical mix of intense story building, relatable character development, and fascinating cinematography, all while being told through a gender and sexuality normative opposite of what we’re used to seeing. It’s a show that encompasses female strength unlike anything I’ve experienced before, where men are the background noise who aid in pushing the plot forward. It’s a show that deserves another season. And another and another and another and another.

It’s a show I needed ten+ years ago, at 18 years old, freshly out of high school and wondering why the fuck I never had crushes on guys like everyone else my age did. It’s the show I needed so I didn’t always wonder why I was so obsessed with Peyton Sawyer and Summer Roberts and why I was the only one I knew who thought Torrance and Missy should’ve ended up together. It’s the show I needed to learn that my femininity doesn’t make me any less tough than my male counterparts. It’s the show I needed so I never put up with anyone’s shit. It’s the show I needed to teach me that I am storm and I am fury.

It’s the show I needed then. But it’s also the show I’m so happy that I have now.

#motherlandfortsalem #motherland fort salem #raylla #clexa #motherland fort salem theory #scylla ramshorn #scylla #raelle #raelleandscylla #raelle collar #lgbtq #this is so long i'm so sorry #abigail bellweather #tally craven

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crowgale · 3 years

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Resident Evil 2 AU

Claire Redfield x Elza Walker

Generally the characters are the same, but with a kick of real so they aren't blank slates. Elza herself is a street-smart, confident young woman with a troubled past.

Born Elizibeth Walker in Anchorage, Alaska to parents separated before she was born, her father was an fortuitous yet endearing construction worker who took custody of her until he went missing during the construction of an Umbrella Research Facility in the Rockies during her early teens and was then sent to Connecticut to live with her mother, who was an abusive drug addict.

In her teens she developed a keen interest in motorcycles while overstudying in a library to avoid her mother and further strengthed it with part-time jobs in various mechanics. Eventually she lost hope in her father being found and her increasingly hostile mother drove her to runaway from home, using connections she developed through gangs and mechanics to move to Florida and join an amatuer racing contest in Daytona under the alias 'Elza' (Her father's nickname for her)... where she broke the track record 4 times (The first was the previous fastest lap time, she then broke her own fastest laps 3 times).

By her 18th birthday she had left her criminal ties behind and became a minor celebrity on the fast track to becoming a professional bike racer. She had sponsers ready to pay her into any university she wanted, emancipation from her mother and enough money saved up from work and victories to let her live as an independant young woman.

Elizabeth was gone. She was Elza now, and she had found her path to happiness.

By 1996 Claire had enrolled in the University of Houstan, Texas. Chris hoped she would enrol in Kansas City so she'd be closer to him but she wasn't going to be his little sister forever. She had grown up quick after their parents died... they both did.

Elza and Claire first met the week before classes started, Claire having just moved into the dorms a day before; Elza arriving like a perfect storm the next day on an customised kawasaki sports bike and a trailer full of her belongings.

Claire recognised her of course, her debut into the racing world made national headlines. So like a dork Claire was shy and tried to avoid Elza as she rode in on her Harley Davidson, after running an errand off campus.

Elza however, heard the sound of a Harley and wanted to know who owned it. She took one look at Claire in her red leather shorts, that 'Made in Heaven' jacket tied around her waist and that tight black bodysuit she had no business looking so sexy in, decided 'Yeah, I'm chilling with you!" and was having none of it.

There was, what a native of Northern Ireland like myself would call, a fresher's fair that night and like a hawk Elza seeked out the introverted Claire and started asking about her bike.

By the end of the night, Claire's shyness vanished upon realising that the seemingly untouchable queen of bikers, whose body was covered in tattoos and whose hair was as wild and untamed as the wind, was actually a massive dork. Elza however found someone who had quickly seen her and not the racing queen. The dealbreaker came when Elza asked what made her get a bike to begin with.

"Well... my brother owned a Suzuki before but... I guess I saw the film 'Akira' and that's what made me do it"

"Oh my god bitch me too!!!"

The two would then become firm friends. Elza being the misadventurous one who managed to talk Claire into actually leaving the library and give herself a break from studying; Claire being the one to get them out of trouble and keep Elza grounded. The two became a power-couple without realising, defending the other from rude people who mocked Elza for daring to be a woman racer or harassed Claire for her looks or for trying to latch onto a celebrity. It went without saying no one could harass these women if they wanted their hearing and face intact.

Things would eventually become more personal between the two. The week after New Years, Elza received news that her mother had died from a drug overdose. Although she didn't need to, Claire bought a side-car for her bike and rode her to New London for the funeral.

The service itself was tense. Elza being uncharacteristically silent and the lack of relatives worried Claire as the service ended. She never saw Elza's eyes look so cold as she gave her eulogy, which she soon realised was a stock eulogy the minister gave to those who didn't write one.

A while after she was buried in the a man approached Elza in the cemetary, introduced himself as her mother's dealer and decided that since she was a famous racer her mother's debt would pass on to Elza and that she would pay him else there would be cpnsequences; it goes without saying she refused to pay off the debt and apathetically asked him to leave.

Claire was on him like a wolf the moment he slapped her and was ready to kill him when he started to threaten her with a knife.

She very nearly did.

They left New London that evening amidst a police BOLO for a woman with auburn hair seen kicking the living shit out of a man in a graveyard. They made it to Kent Island before a blizzard rolled in and they had to say at an inn along the Chesepeake Bay.

That night Claire meant to apologise for her actions, stating she saw her get hit and just... reacted. But Elza pulled her into a tight hug and finally released her pent up emotions. She told Claire about her fathers disappearance, about the years of torment at her mothers hands, that this wasn't the first time something like this happened, that she doesn't understand why she's crying if she hated her mother so much and how much it hurt to remember all those terrrible things and have someone make her feel like that scared little girl again.

Claire, feeling her best friend shake in her arms, doesn't know what to say. She's silent for a time as Elza holds onto her like a lifeline, as if letting go would make her fall off the Earth itself. She finally tells Elza that she isn't that little girl anymore.

"You are Elza Walker! Yhe Woman who can never be slowed! You're unreachable! Unstoppable! And no one will ever hurt you again!... I... don't want to see you hurt again"

Elza didn't speak for a while after that... but eventually she did and what she said broke Claire.

"I've wished for someone like you my whole life Claire"

Life returned to normal soon after that. One tournament race was enough to bring Elza Walker roaring back to life and with a vengeance. She was faster, she was braver, her smile after each weekly victory able to light up the world... or at least Claire's, who now made it a point to go to every race, or at least watch it on TV if the race was in a city too far out of reach.

Elza knew Claire was watching her... she figured that's why she was doing better now.

Spring came and went, the summer exams now already a fading memory to the pair, but foreshadowed by Claire losing her part-time job and being unable to find another one. With no means to pay for her student fees it looked like she would be forced to drop-out.

But Elza wouldn't have any of it.

"I know how you can pay off your fees. A guy in my pit crew retired a month ago and I've been short two hands ever since. It's hard work but the pays good and if I make pro next month it'll be even better"; she said idly at a bar one evening.

"You... you want me in your pit crew?"; Claire asked incredulously.

"No, I want you as my personal pitbabe so I can drool at you in a tight spandex jumpsuit looking all cute with dirt on your face"; Elza said with a lop-sided smile.

"Ha!"

"Hm... seriously Claire, I want you there with me. I can't imagine anyone better to look after me on the track"; Elza said confidently.

"...You do take way too many risks"; Claire mused, before Elza held her cheek in her hands.

"You told me once that I am the woman who can never be slowed... well Redfield, I'd slow down for you!"

Elza's manager might have called her decision to hire Claire personally driven and entirely unprofessional. However, Claire proved herself highly compotent within a week of employment, being able to keep up with the repairs, adjustments and tyre changes her job demanded.

It was also found that Elza actually listened to Claire whenever she was pushing her luck, which turned out to be a blessing in the final race of the season in San Francesco. Her main rival who was tied for 1st with Elza didn't want to lose to a woman, and in the final 3 laps had begun making poor judgement calls to try and keep up with her. Risky overtakes, tight cornering and high speed was equally met, and soon Elza found herself in a dogfight she refused to lose.

If Claire hadn't screamed at her to brake before the last corner, she would have been thrown off her bike with her rival after an attemped inside lane overtake resulted in them losing control of the bike and wiping out.

Elza won of course, making it into the professional league. It was a dream come true. At no point after she took off her helmet and locked teary eyes with Claire could she make any expression that wasn't a bashful smile or tears of joy. It also seemed like she couldn't stop looking at Claire during the victory reception or later that night on the train ride home... where she had too much to drink, leaving Claire having to help Elza meander into the sleeping car after the 8th Buttery Nipple.

She helped her move herself onto the bed, but Elza didn't let go of her hand. Instead she brought her hand to her lips and kissed her knuckles and held it to her cheek as she openly wept.

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percilout · 4 years

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Why I think Jaskier is queer-coded and also bi/pan: An Essay

Earlier today I made a post [x] asking for opinions on Jaskier being queer-coded and now I’m presenting you my 1.5k word long essay on why I think that’s the case and why I also think that Jaskier is bi/pan (even though the character most definitely wasn’t planned that way).

I used lots of gifsets and Tumblr posts as inspiration and sources and humbly thank everyone who has made my life much easier with those.

Okay, so, let me start this off by saying that the showrunners don‘t and most probably won‘t want to make Jaskier queer in any way. But there‘s a bit of a problem there because there‘s a good chance that the actor (Joey Batey) is going to go against that with his personal choices in acting the character out.

It doesn‘t help that there‘s an interview in which he actively goes against calling Jaskier a womaniser and says that he is just „falling in love with everyone“ as soon as he sees „them“, he spots „someone“ and is obsessed with „whoever“ is in front of him. You can see it in this post (https://heydrichmuller.tumblr.com/post/189946596054/my-brother-played-the-pronoun-game-wound-up) in which what the actor does is called „playing the pronoun game“. That‘s what lots of queer people do when talking about their love life/sexuality/partners/etc. I say it doesn‘t help because it actively paints the character he‘s playing as bi/pan, especially with the „he just loves everyone“ comment.

Then there‘s another thing, now something that we can see in the show - movement.

Queer-coding hugely depends on clichés, I know that, but that doesn‘t mean that those clichés aren‘t true sometimes. So when I look at Jaskier‘s movements and he‘s moving his hands a certain way, cocking his hips and holding his hands there, cocking his head, I can‘t help seeing a queer person there. (https://gayregis.tumblr.com/post/189807338329/its-all-about-the-hand-gestures-joey-batey-as)

That also brings me to the next point:

He‘s a Drama Queen. He gasps! And argues! And cannot believe the way he’s treated! He deserves better!

Now, one could say that He‘s a bard! That‘s what he does! It‘s to entertain people! But. Jaskier doesn‘t entertain people when he‘s being a drama queen. Instead, he‘s greatly annoying them with it and, at the most, only entertaining himself. This is mostly visible in the „You need a nap!“ scene, which also shows his exaggerated movements pretty well. (https://captainpoe.tumblr.com/post/189836119464/the-witcher-1x05-bottled-appetites)

Then there are some other scenes that (to any queer person, I‘d say) just scream „this can‘t be straight, can it?“, simply bc it‘d be So Fucking Weird if it‘s actually meant to be straight...

One of those is the bathtub scene. Like, what, it‘s normal to rub your friend-not-friend‘s „lovely bottom“ with camomile? In what world??? And there‘s no reason Jaskier needs to do any of that, Geralt could have just bathed himself. (https://mrcavill.tumblr.com/post/189812738178)

From that we can go on to another part of the bathtub scene: „And yet, here we are“ (https://catness-tchalla.tumblr.com/post/his-189817475480), implying that Jaskier wants/needs Geralt.

Jaskier‘s basically running after a fruitless friendship for over 10 years. He‘s showing real perseverance in befriending someone, while also employing excuses to do so (using the fact of being a bard and /having/ to sing about him/sharing his legacy as an excuse to stick close to him for so long). And he does try to have a kind of intimacy with a man who‘s generally seen as someone who‘s intimidating and driving everyone away. (https://thewitchersdaily.tumblr.com/post/189937577863/no-lord-in-his-right-mind-will-come-close-if)

Still, Jaskier‘s desperate to have his company and wants to continue travelling together to prove that he can be a good partner. (https://meldvnsk.tumblr.com/post/189961512351/me-when-i-see-how-desperately-jaskier-want-to-be)

I do also want to make a point about Jaskier‘s outfits, although most of it can really be condensed into Well, He Is A Bard, So.

But I just want to state that there is no reason for him to still dress so extravagantly when he‘s just walking through the woods for days and weeks with Geralt. At first he has no other choice but, with the years, surely he can learn to have something more.... practical.... in his bag with him? But no, he chooses to keep his style and always look out of place. And, well, queer people are kinda known for the special care they take of their clothing (https://meldvnsk.tumblr.com/post/189960250906/jaskiers-outfits)

Then I want to shine some light on the way Jaskier talks about him on their first day of meeting: https://thewitchersdaily.tumblr.com/post/189776322313/same-geralt-of-rivia-and-jaskier-in-the-witcher and https://skywalkrluke.tumblr.com/post/189956240667/the-witcher-2019. He is basically trying to please this, well, Manly Man™, with his (very awkward) compliments, akin to another scene we know - the „sexy goose“ fiasco, in which Jaskier totally fails in Flirting 101. (https://thewitcherdaily.tumblr.com/post/189811062630/the-witcher-1x06-rare-species)

In episode 6, there‘s a scene that a lot of queer people can identify with (or at least I think so and I actually do). Jaskier is trying to comfort Geralt in a way, but also himself. He suggests leaving together, to „get away for a while“, to run away from all their problems while still sharing each other’s company. And what hits the most is the bard saying that No, he is not thinking about a new song right now, this is just about them, this is just about him trying to figure out what he himself wants. (https://skyvalker.tumblr.com/post/189947455079/the-witcher-2019-s01e06-rare-species)

And now we come to the point where I can seriously not think anything else but „Oh boy, that guy is love with another man“: Her Sweet Kiss (https://youtu.be/NyZvWBFbIRw).

First off, the song is a reaction to Geralt‘s rejection of him and states how hurt he is by that rejection (https://captnswilson.tumblr.com/post/189886399796/if-life-could-give-me-one-blessing-it-would-be-to).

But I will go into a bit more detail, starting with the changes in the song that happened between the first time we hear it (start of episode 6) and the time we finally hear the finished song at the end of the episode.

Firstly, „I‘m weak, love“ changed to „I‘m weak, my love“, underlining with the use of the possessive pronoun that whoever is the „I“ sings about their personal loved one.

Secondly, there‘s the line „garroter, jury and judge“.

We know that Geralt is the mentioned garroter (remember Marilka saying Geralt sounds like garroter in the first ep?). Now, what does it say that Jaskier is debating whether to use „gorgeous garroter“ or „lovely garroter“ in the song and then ends up using neither? My take on this is that the finished song focuses more on the pain he experiences than being a hymn on the heroic actions of the handsome Witcher. The idea of a gorgeous garroter has actually become, as Jaskier calls it, „too cerebral“.

I‘ve talked quite a bit about the song now without having explained what I think it actually means, so let‘s come to that.

Her Sweet Kiss has three sets of personal pronouns - I, you, and she. I believe that those stand for Jaskier, Geralt and Yennefer respectively. Going with this choice of characters, it‘s fairly easy to see what the lyrics want to tell us.

In the first verse, Jaskier is basically just complaining about Yennefer. He paints her as the evil one, the one causing him heartache and pain.

I do not think that this verse, as I have read quite often, is written from Geralt‘s perspective. It doesn‘t make much sense regarding the use of pronouns and the meaning of the verse.

Why would Geralt complain about her and then call her his love? Why would he talk about her (using „she“ and „her“) and then switch to talking to her („Tell me, love“)?

It makes much more sense to say that this is Jaskier talking about „her“ (Yennefer) to his „love“ (Geralt), especially when one thinks about the line „How is that just?“.

That last line of the verse shows Jaskier criticising Geralt‘s actions. It directly accuses him of being unjust towards Jaskier, something that was previously unheard of because the Witcher always does the thing that does the world justice. But in this case, the bard was left hurt by him without a good reason.

When it comes to the chorus, there is nothing much to interpret. The lyrics plainly state that Geralt‘s relationship with Yennefer is destroying something. Looking at the context of Geralt and Yennefer „breaking up“, followed by Geralt forcing Jaskier to leave, this must clearly mean the destruction of Geralt‘s and Jaskier‘s friendship.

The second verse starts with Jaskier warning Geralt of Yennefer, who is depicted as a dangerous current, pulling him closer into her clutches.

The verse then ends with the part we already know from the beginning of the episode.

„I’m weak my love, and I am wanting

If this is the path I must trudge

I welcome my sentence

Give to you my penance

Garrotter, jury and judge“

If you think this is Jaskier giving up and leaving Geralt alone after having accompanied him for more than a decade, having finally been judged and sentenced to a life without him by the famous garroter, then yes, we are exactly on the same wavelength there.

(Of course I don‘t think that that‘s what the producers thought while making it but hey, that‘s exactly where the accidental queer-coding comes in again!

So, anyway, this is exactly why I see Jaskier as bi/pan but of course that‘s only my personal perspective.)

Tagging the people who helped me by making gifsets and sharing their thoughts on Jaskier:

@lola1b @pocketlibrary @heydrichmuller @gayregis @captainpoe @mrcavill @his-catness-tchalla @thewitchersdaily @meldvnsk @skywalkrluke @skyvalker @captnswilson

#jaskier #geraskier #gerlion #geralt x jaskier #the witcher #geralt/jaskier #lgbtq

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ridiasfangirlings · 4 years

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There would probably be a lot of bidders for Fushimi's kiss XD Like maybe it's not just the one Strain who has a crush on Fushimi but quite a few of them do, that's why he's so often their target after all. The Strain gets a good idea on how to capitalize on this, capture Fushimi and then try to auction off his kiss. Maybe this Strain has like some mind control-type powers similar to the Prince in DOB, so if the Strain tells Fushimi to kiss someone he will. The Strain sets a trap for Fushimi and manages to catch him, Fushimi probably expects that this Strain is like plotting some revenge against him or something and is totally confused when the Strain starts plotting his evil plan: an auction at a nearby club for Fushimi Saruhiko's kiss. Fushimi is like what the actual fuck but the Strain is pretty pleased with himself, sending out invitations to the auction and getting Fushimi ready for the big event (by dressing him in something gauzy and skimpy so that he looks nice and tempting).

Meanwhile of course Scepter 4 and Homra are looking for Fushimi and all worried about his well being. Say at this point Fushimi hasn't expressed feelings for anyone yet but Yata has definitely realized that he likes Fushimi as more than a friend, and beyond that he's also starting to suspect that Munakata feels that way about Fushimi too. This makes Munakata Yata's rival and Yata totally doesn't trust him, like who knows what this guy was doing to Saruhiko while he and Yata were fighting. Munakata doesn't seem to recognize Yata as his rival at all which also irritates Yata, like he thinks this is Munakata acting as if he's already won and Yata's going to prove him wrong, like Yata's determined that he's gonna be the one who wins Saruhiko's heart. Yata thinks if he could rescue Fushimi then that would be the perfect time to like confess his love (after kicking the ass of whoever kidnapped Saruhiko of course).

Munakata manages to find out that Fushimi's been transported to this particular night club where there are invitations going out for some big auction. Everyone assumes that the Strain is planning to auction Fushimi off to criminals for like revenge plots and such, worried that Fushimi could end up in some horrible situation if they can't save him before it's too late. Munakata quickly puts into motion a plan, the Homra and Scepter 4 alphabet will work together to get set up as workers at the club while Munakata and Yata will take point and actually infiltrate the auction itself. Yata wonders how they're going to do that and Munakata gives him a brilliant grin as he says he already has that particular issue taken care of.

Cue the day of the auction and Yata and Munakata are portraying a loving couple entering the club together. Yata's really not into having to act lovey-dovey with the Blue King but if it'll save Saruhiko he's willing to do anything. Munakata appears to have no problems with the situation whatsoever and Yata really wishes this guy would stop getting so close into his personal space. They enter the club and the auction is just beginning, there's Fushimi all dolled up and maybe like held in a cage looking all sexy and helpless on stage. Yata almost chokes seeing Fushimi in that outfit and Munakata has to like fake a kiss to keep him from giving them away. Up on stage Fushimi sees this and he feels his heart drop, like he recognizes Yata and Munakata even in their disguises but he didn't think those two were actually this close and seeing someone else get so close to Misaki reminds him how he'll never really be good enough to be with Yata himself.

The auction starts, the Strain stating that the winner will get Fushimi's first kiss and even though this means at least Fushimi's life isn't in danger Yata's like wait what the fuck over my dead body, no one is stealing Saruhiko's first kiss except him. It turns out though that this isn't just a monetary auction, it's like a battle royale for Fushimi's kiss and suddenly Munakata and Yata are pitted against all these Strains all fighting for Fushimi's kiss. Yata fights his hardest but even he can't hold a candle to Munakata, who manages to take down every Strain that approaches him and in the end gets to dramatically throw off his disguise as he defeats the Strain who kidnapped Fushimi in the first place.

The Strain can't believe that the Blue King himself came here and he tosses Munakata the key to Fushimi's cage, saying the kiss is his. Yata finds his fists clenching as he steps up on the stage and he has to hold himself back, like if this is what Saruhiko wants Yata can't interfere. Munakata glances back at Yata as he says that there is someone else with a stronger claim than himself to that particular kiss, throwing Yata the keys. Yata's eyes widen and he goes to free Fushimi, who is still very confused about Yata and Munakata and why they're suddenly a couple. Yata says he knows he wasn't the highest bidder or anything but he can't let anyone else kiss the person he loves, sweeping Fushimi up all dramatically and giving him a kiss right in front of all the gathered clansmen.

#sarumi #Talking K #the best auction XD #everyone wants Fushimi's kiss #even some of the undercover alphabet boys get in on the fight #you know just in case #yata's even more pumped than if Fushimi was in actual danger though #like no way he's letting anyone else take Saruhiko's first kiss #then they get to have dramatic love confessions while Fushimi is still only half dressed

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theliterateape · 3 years

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Wonder Woman 1984 Couldn’t Save the Story

By David Himmel

I’ve been looking forward to the sequel to 2017’s Wonder Woman since the film ended with Wonder Woman herself leaping from the top of a building and soaring into the credits. So when it was announced that Wonder Woman 1984 was going to be available on HBO Max Christmas Day, I went to bed each night with visions of indestructible bracelets dancing in my head.

Then it finally arrived. Christmas. WW84.

My wife and I settled into the couch with a bucket of Cherry Coke, a cornucopia of candy, and two obnoxious bowls of fresh popped popcorn soaked in butter. It was the movie-going experience I had been missing this year.

I love Wonder Woman. I didn’t grow up on the source material. I grew up on Lynda Carter. Reruns of the campy Wonder Woman TV show, which originally ran from 1975–1979 were a favorite of mine as a little kid. Not only was it an entertaining show for a preschooler in the eighties with the jumping and bullet-blocking and running, but I was also in love with Lynda Carter both as Diana Prince and Wonder Woman.

You see—sounding all Freudian alarms—my mother is a brunette and, from what I could tell at that young age, she could do anything and everything, so I grew up likening my mom to the Amazonian goddess. I also thought any pretty lady with brown hair was my mom including the woman on the Sun-Maid raisins box. (Despite my mother being a beauty queen and model—just like Lynda Carter—the real Sun-Maid Girl died at age 90 two months before I turned four.) From my vantage point, my mom was completely capable of saving the day and harvesting yummy raisins. A true wonder woman.

I wasn’t a big reader of the Wonder Woman comics. Blame that on my time as a boy in 1984. Wonder Woman comics didn’t make their way to me and by the time I was old enough to choose my own reads, I was too deep into graphic novels about the Vietnam War, X-Men comics, and other Marvel titles. But I always knew Diana’s story and powers, and recognized her as one of the most powerful characters to grace the pages of comic books.

Settled into the couch, we hit play and HBO Max glowed to life to give me the Christmas gift I’d been waiting months for.

The opening scene set the tone. A thrilling action scene showcasing the abilities of Diana’s people back on Themyscira. It dropped a few hints of what challenges Diana/Wonder Woman might face and the lessons she will learn or be reminded of. Good opening. And then the film fell apart and Christmas was ruined.

Nah, Christmas was fine, but Wonder Woman 1984 was a disappointment. And not as much for me as for Diana and Wonder Woman. And for actor Gal Gadot. She was robbed of an interesting story. There is no character development in WW84 for our hero. Diana is in the exact same place as she was at the end of the first film. She picks up a few new abilities along the way, but one, like flying in an invisible jet felt like director/writer/producer Patty Jenkins was force feeding me a MacGuffin only to throw it away after I agreed to swallow it. Flight is a big thing in this film but Wonder Woman learning to master it seemed wasteful as I was convinced she was learning to fly based on the way the first film ended. That’s on me.

When we left Wonder Woman in the first film, she was heartbroken for Steve Trevor (Chris Pine). When we meet her again in 1984, some seventy years after his death, she still pines for him. (See what I did there?) By the end, she’s the same. Closed off, unwilling or unable to open herself up to people, most notably to people who could love her and she could love in return. This, despite that Steve tells her that’s a stupid thing to do—remain closed off. When he comes back to life through a wish, he is filled with a zest for life, a chance to experience something again. Pine plays Steve with an almost childlike wonder and it’s fun to watch.

They missed an incredible opportunity to build an interesting story tying in time, the struggle and pain of being ageless—timeless. Maybe that’s how Steve comes back. He exists in a tear in time. What is the hardship of a god living among men? Not her challenging duty but her struggle.

And why 1984? For the fashion jokes? The nukes? Missed opportunity there. Especially since the year is in the title.

Kristin Wiig is great. She’s surprising as she anchors her Ghostbusters (2016) character into Barbara Minerva/Cheetah. But I wanted more form her relationship with Diana. When Barbara wishes to be like Diana, “Sexy, cool… special,” there’s a chance for her to also face the backlash of being an ageless goddess. That opportunity was dampened when Barbara cartoonishly chooses to become a full baddy. But you can’t blame Barbara, she was written that way.

Everything was written as a MacGuffin. One little thing to get us to the big moment with the big baddy—a Donald Trump-ish huckster played by Pedro Pascal. Pascal as Max Lord at first is a slimey but sympathetic character. That quickly devolves into him being a super-duper bad guy bent on world domination that overcorrects in heightening the stakes. The manner in which he goes about dominating the world is trite but also is based on a lazy Orwellian approach to what technology would be like in 1984. It gives the sense that the film was written during Lynda Carter’s heyday where 1984 still seemed futuristic.

There’s so much opportunity squandered. Diana/Wonder Woman is an ageless goddess with a lonely heart and incredible powers. How does one live like that? In the first film, Diana is learning what it means to be human. This film could have had her learning what it means to be a god among humans. Instead, the character is a pawn. She’s not driven by anything. And that’s what gets me.

Diana could be relatable. Make her the troubled messiah. She lives among us so long, she longs or struggles to be like us. And maybe losing her power—the unknown risk she takes when Steve comes back—is attractive to her so she can live and love. And if they had to bring back Chris Cline, the could have dipped into the mystique and magic of Diana’s world. Something more than a silly wish. Something more interesting that pushes Diana to face new internal struggles while working to defeat the external forces of evil.

The film sets itself up as movie that’ll deal with time. There’s a date in the title. But why 1984? For the nukes? For the broadcast Max Lord needs to tap into? For the fanny pack jokes? Jenkins and Co. could have given the theme a little more oompf by leaning into their own ideas of time and address the hardships a an ageless, nearly all powerful goddess faces. Instead, we get a joke about modern public art being trash and a WWI watch coming to life because… because the ghost of the man who owned it has come back from the beyond. Two completely unrelated things. But they didn’t have to be.

The film takes its time with the wrong beats. There are many big moments, often in the middle of the action, where Wonder Woman’s face is the focus. The only takeaway from these slowed down moments of intensity are for the sake of empowerment. And, okay, fine. That’s cool. I get it. Wonder Woman is empowering. The movie, however, is not empowering. It’s a vehicle that reduces Wonder Woman to a physically strong woman who does not develop as an individual. She’s the most dimensional inspiring cinematic female character since the offensive Captain Marvel.

Time proves to be a major influencer in the film in the way it’s wasted. When they have to fly to Cairo, they do so by stealing a jet that Diana has access to thanks to her job at the museum, and allegedly will face no consequences for hoarking a fighter jet for personal reasons. Regardless… They have to get from Washington D.C. to Cairo, a trip of just over 5,000 nautical miles. A modern Boeing 747 can fly 8,255 nautical miles on a full tank of gas. A fighter jet with a smaller tank would likely need every last drop and the wind at their backs the entire time to make the tip without refueling or plummeting into the ocean. Instead of being concerned with that, Steve and Diana choose that time to have their romantic scene. Flips and tricks and dawdling through a Fourth of July fireworks show. And why was Steve surprised by the fireworks and it being July 4th? He just arrived in a new body the day before. He certainly checked the date on a newspaper or heard something on the radio or a TV. And the Fourth of July was already a holiday before he was killed in World War I.

These gripes would be nitpicking if they weren’t so easily remedied by giving the main character an actual story arc.

Wonder Woman 1984 was a fine superhero movie. Far from the best (Captain America: Civil War). Better than the worst (Justice League). It had its share of fun action moments, but even in an action film, the action must be secondary to the story.

After watching the film, we turned on the old TV show. There’s not much character development there either. But it’s a 1970s network television procedural. It’s meant to be campy. And it was more than enough.

Following the three-hour Lynda Carter bender, I realized that you could totally edit scenes in WW84 to make a trailer about a woman who takes care of, then falls in love with, a mentally handicapped man. And that would be a great story to tell. Wonder Woman with Hollywood blockbuster money behind her deserves something interesting.

#Wonder Woman #Wonder Woman 1984 #WW84 #Gal Gadot #Kristin Wiig #Pedro Pascal #Lynda Carter

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xsecretblastsx · 4 years

Text

1x18 Much I do about nothing

So, here it is the final recap for S1. Once again this one took way too long, but long story short I have limited access to a laptop I’m basically only able to do this on mobile, which is not the best.

I normally do the recaps in one sitting, which takes me quite a while and it’s hard for me to find the time to do it. So going forward I’m going to try to do it a bit differently and watch the epsiode in parts, I’m hoping that will help to have the recaps out there faster.

Anyway, here’s the recap.

Thoughts I had while watching the episode

Serena calling after Dan all night... he isnt’t worthy of that but she loves him so there’s that

Rufus and Lily finally got their sexy time. Too bad is the morning of Lily’s wedding. Talk about akward.

This is one of my fave scenes of Chuck and Blair, there’s cuteness, there’s flirty banter and feisty Blair, what’s not to love.

I still want to know the story about him not removing that scarf. Just for entertaining purposes.

Nate and his dad running is a nice little call back to the early episodes of S1, which feels like ages ago.

And here we are with Dan and Georgina and Serena finally exposing her as a manipulative evil mastermind

Thanks Serena for reminding that Lily & Rufus can’t coexist with Dan and Serena 😪

That scene between Bart and Lily is actually good, he’s obviously making a point and letting her know she must make a choice, the good old days when Bart was actually a character and not a cartoon villian.

I remember thinking on my first watch while Dan and Blair are scheming, the show should make them snarky friends that would be fun. 😪

Seriously Dan and ‘Sarah’ have known each other for how long and they already have “their spot” guys are the worst

“Humphrey you’re a born liar” you don’t even know the half of it Blair

As much as I love Blair and this iconic line “haven’t you heard, I’m the crazy bitch around here” I still can’t believe that aftet plotting the whole night with Chuck their plan was just ratting her out to her parents.

Sorry Jenny but that dress Vanessa is wearing is awful. Actually I’m not a fan of Blair’s dress either. Anyway everything is a tad better with ‘Time to pretend’ playing in the background, overplayed as it was I still love it.

Also Blair and Chuck again with the flirty bantering, reminiscing a bit about that first time and Chuck getting kicked. Quality content all around.

I don’t know about Serena but luckily for Blair twenty years in the future she won’t be on her fourth husband

I always hated that “I didn’t sleep with Georgina, but I may as well have” like first of all what does that even mean. Second it’s so frustating because it feels like the show went through great lengths to keep Dan as the “good guy” on this particular situation, and that wasn’t fair to Serena.

Even though I know this is only the end of S1 and there’s more to come I’ll forever be bitter about Rufus and Lily not being together. I do like the bittersweet note of this particular moment though.

Rufly aside I have such a soft spot for the Van der Basses. Sure it was far from perfect but still.

That earlier bit between Nate and Chuck with the captain pointing out that whoever the girl they’re fighting about ain’t worth it and Chuck agreeing and Nate saying that’s the problem may seem like another of Chuck douchbag smarmy moments, but I actually like how it sort of makes sense later in the episode, because is only when Chuck admits the truth to Nate about how he felt about Blair, that Nate not only finally listens to him about the captain, but is also willing to have his friend back.

Poor Nate, always being let down by his father, at least he got to make his point, even if he had to punch his dad (again) to do it.

Even though Blair is on full bitch mode towards Vanessa, she ain’t actually wrong about Nate: endless family drama and never getting over Serena.

Nate and Chuck’s friendship isn’t as larger than life as Blair and Serenas, but is one I still love, and finally is back on. Also Nate’s amused and surprised smile about Chuck’s feelings for Blair is priceless. Chuck’s reaction too, how con someone be smug and shy at the same time?

Dan makes me want to scream like what bullshit is thid “i got seduced by a girl who was pretending to someone else and you knew” so somehow that’s Serenad fault? “I am the most understanding person in the world” Excuse me!!! In what universe, like honestly Dan just shut up.

The fact that this show actually has Serena saying “we are exactly we were at the Bass brunch when we started dating I wasn’t the person you thought I was and you can’t forgive that” and then Dan just sidetracks and claims a lot has happen... and we’re only on season one

Beside the fact that I love the scene of Chuck’s speech while he’s looking at Blair, this line is so spot on “in the face of true love you don’t give up, even if the object of your affection is begging you to” the whole speech is basically the abreviated version of the Chuck and Blair story.

Serena’s is in her own cloud of missery and yet she still makes a face when she sees Chuck and Blair are kissing 😂

Chuck Bass is a romantic, and that’s all that matters 😉.

As much as I’m not sad about Dan and Serena breaking up, it is kind of sad watching them have a last dance with ‘the ice’s getting thinner” playing in the background (such a good song btw)

I had honestly forgot about Jenny for a bit here.

I feel so robbed because they just skip a week and we didn’t got to see any of it, like Chuck being a complete gentlemen? C’mon! Anyway Blair’s traveling outfit is almos customy, nevermind I still love it, it also helps how fears about helicopters aside, she’s excited she’s about the Tuscany trip,

I remember the first time I was like so that’s the end of Nate and Vanessa? How swift. Not that I mind because that scene between Nate and Serena was so promising about summer and the Hamptons... but that’s a rant for S2

The way Bart can’t help but messing up Chuck’s head, even if he doesn’t try to, though whith Bart one never knows. Fun fact: the first time I watched this episode when Chuck goes after Amelia I literally screamed to the screen: “NO!!!’ You idiot”.

So that’s a wrap on Season 1! It was such a fun ride and I’m going to miss it. This last episode was really packed, it also felt quite long for some reason. It also ends with every major ship on the outs, which sucks a bit but it’s also a great set up for season 2.

First there’s Dan and Serena, who call it quits because for the last few episodes their relationship has been a constance struggle of secret and lies. One could make the point that their relationship was always dishonest by Dan’s secret identity as gossip girl, god knows I’ve been ranting about that the whole season particularly the last episode, because in principle is very hypocrital of Dan to be so mad about Serena’s lies when he’s keeping the biggest secret of all. But since she doesn’t know this the whole discussion is centered about her mistakes... Serena makes the very valid (and true) point that Dan can’t forgive her for not being who he thought she was, and this is something that’s going to keep being an issue for them the whole show, but for this particular break up the other big issue is lack of trust

Trust is the key point in a relationship and how can Dan trust Serena if she lies and hides stuff, they can’t have a relationship that way, even if she has come clean about her past who’s not to say if they come across another issue Serena will be honest this time and not hide and try to handle it on her own, truth is she most likely will, (she does act this way in future seasons) but what I would like to point out is that as much as Dan can’t trust her now, Serena actually never trusted him, not in the sense that he would spill her secrets but rather that she didn’t trust him not to judge her and she also didn’t trust that he would still love her if he knew everything about her. And in her mind he proves her right that’s why she points out they’re having the same argument they had at the Bass brunch and even so (sadly) Serena still wants to work through this and Dan is the one that says no, let’s break up. I don’t disagree with him is better for them to be separated but I ‘m petty and so I kind of hate he’s the one in his high horse breaking up with her, when he almost cheated on her with Georgina and even has the nerve to be like “i only did that because you cheated on me and you’re a liar and you let me get involved with a psycho” and it’s just hell no Dan! First of all no one force you to do anything, and also how long did he knew this girl Sarah and they already have “their spot” like that’s on you, and I’m not even mentioning how this argument of the psycho pretty much destroys itself when one remember he’s gossip girl so... who’s the most twisted manipulative one there. I would have issues with Dan and Serena even if he wasn’t Gossip Gilr, but the fact that he is... seriously he’s one devious guy.

Also not a fan of the show going out of their way to keep Dan’s nice guy image, they keep teasing his night with Georgina and then they decide to be light, well he didn’t actually slept with her, the intention was there, but he didn’t because he’s good Dan and sex is meaningful for him, so it’s a big deal for him, but still he was nice and faithful. Sorry but no, have him cheat, everyone else in this show makes questionable decisions and surely the UES changes Dan, so I would like for the show to embrace, they eventualy show it, but they had the space to start to show it much earlier, also just for the record sex with Dan was meaningful for Serena, it wasn’t something she had really experienced before, and it was pointed out earlier in the season, so sex it’s not only meaningful for Dan.

Other two relationships have a quick death this episode: Rufly & Nate and Vanessa. The later gets set aside almost like and afterthought which was dissapointing because it was like why bother then in the first place? Also I actually like their interactions and Vanessa while still judgemental makes and effort for Nate to be more understanding and in turn allows her to show different sides of her character and that’s nice. Then we have that scene between Nate and serena and it’s iluminatinhg, because at list at this point it looke like the show wanted to set something up there and it’s like finally! let’s unravel this (and then...😪 but that’s a rant for the next recap). Rufly on the other hand I like how it went, it felt natural and yet sad because basically they don’t take their chance because they feel that boat sailed a long time ago, it’s been 20 years, and they could have stolen moments, but more than that is just not possible, doesn’t seem like it could work at this stage of their lifes, and while it’s exciting to take the plunge I totally get why they didn’t here.

Finally there’s Chuck and Blair, and me screaming into infinity. Don’t get me wrong I love this episode and even when I still was like No Chuck you idiot! In some ways it needed to happen. Or at least some version of it, but I’m getting ahead of myself. What I love about this episode is all their flirty banter, their chemistry shines through every single scene they have, and they truly make me think of much ado about nothing, i like the back and forth and the obvious subtext of how much they truly like each other, and one can also tell how this is exciting for them, these thing between it’s a first for both of them for him it’s the first time he wanted more from a girl, he yearns for her in a way he never has feel before, he feels, he’s in love, and to her is quite a heady experience to be so openly wanted by someone, she doesn’t even have to try, to force it like she did Nate whose eyes were always following her best friend, Chuck’s eyes follow her and no else. For a minute there they take the plunge, armed with having his best friend back and getting a family Chuck’s goes for it via a best man speech and an apology. He’s a romantic at heart and he wants her to know, and she can’t resist it and goes for it to.

We’re robbed from that week they’re together after that night and is such a shame because while I feel internally each of them have acknowledged they’re in love with each other, there’s a difference between falling in love with someone and actually loving someone, and I feel this is the time that while they obviously don’t speak about it, I don’t even think they fully realized then but they truly fell for each other to the point where it was never the same again. It’s a scary thought, and it’s Bart who brings those fears to the front of Chuck’s mind, the guy is scared to death, is not only because the change of going from womanizing playboy to boyfriend seems monumental for a guy like him but more importantly Chuck’s someone who believes the worst of himself, and it wasn’t a big deal for him, because to eyes of the person whose opinion matters the most to him he’s alreayd a failure and that’s not got to change, but Blair is his second thoughest critic, what she thinks matters and unlike Bart she actually believes he has it in him, to be whatever he wants to and Bart’s words make him think of the expectations Blair may have of him now, and the thought of proving her wrong, he doesn’t want her to see that, and sure he’s going to fail and she’ll hate him for it... and that would be it. So better to end it now, on his terms while he’s the one in control of the situation and put a stop to it.

Bottom line he ain’t ready for it at all, he actually won’t be for a long time, and because of this is going to take Blair a lot of time too to be ready for it. Is what I like about Chuck’s best man speech at first glance is his way to tell Blair he feels something for her and he wants her to give him, them the chance to be something. It’s a plight at heart. It also works perfectly as a summary of what their relationship will be for a while. That no matter what, they love each other, theirs is true love and even if it’s hard almost impossible at times, they can’t give up, and that when one of them wants to throw the towel there’s the other one to remind them of why is worth it in the end.

The game between them is really about to start, here we go S2.

Random bits I’ve noticed:

Chuck lightly squeezing his dad’s arm when Lily’s almost at the end of the altar warmed my heart.

#gossip girl rewatch #gossip girl recap #gossip girl #1x18 #much i do about nothing

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