#which works so well. like especially considering jack disappeared for a bit cause the canon side of that literally could just be

[saras-almanac]

creator tag meme

The lovely @softlass27 tagged me to do this and I am literally only seeing this now, on January 3rd. But what is time anymore? Right? And she’s also the reason her ask about my fic “letting go” has popped back up. Was that really only in September that I answered that? Seriously, what is time? 

Also... yeah I didn’t really write a lot this year. I usually write a fair amount, especially with my own original stuff too, but I just didn’t have it in me this year. My biggest problem (if you consider it a problem) is I love angst and character studies and really digging in to characters and allowing them room to speak their truth or really explore something that canon leaves unexplored. If you will. And in this year of the pandemic and staying at home and all the constant anxiety around that, I just didn’t have the emotional endurance to write a lot of the things I wanted to write. So... just know that I didn’t write a lot this year. 

1. finding one’s footing 

Summary: Two years after Robert is sentenced to prison, he comes home to Emmerdale. Unfortunately it's not that simple as Robert struggles with the anxiety and stress of leaving prison, his mind reverting him back to his post-shooting days, and Chas trying to run him from the village. She's understandably upset at how much Robert hurt Aaron, but Aaron's more closed off than Robert has seen him in years. Robert's desperate to find a way to mend things with Aaron, if only to be friends, but he's not sure he'll be able to with Aaron's strange attitudes towards him, Chas angrily coming at Robert for so much as breathing, and his own struggles.

Reunion 3.0 - Very Robert-centric as he works to rebuild himself and the relationships he "ruined" years ago. Will eventually lead to Aaron/Robert reunion.

I literally cannot believe that this was started at the beginning of the year. And I also can’t believe that I haven’t written anything for it in months. Oops. I still really love this fic idea and really being able to dive into Robert’s frame of mind after being released from prison and really trying to readjust to life again and also just sort of facing the things he tried to avoid in prison. I just love all fics where Robert gets to really voice what he wants or needs and / or fics where Aaron fights for Robert. Plus I cannot wait to write the scene were Robert basically yells at Chas and Paddy for treating Aaron like absolute shit after he was arrested. 

2.  waiting 

Summary:  It’s been two years and Aaron’s still waiting. Literally ever since he found out Robert had been released and on his way to Emmerdale. Reunion 3.0 that is really sappy…

I honestly forgot I even wrote this! (What is this year?) And I just realized that I never cross posted it to ao3 so I’m gonna have to do that this week. But I just really love reunion fics or fics where they’re just happy together. I know that seems contradictory to what I wrote above, but it’s true? And I mean, this isn’t entirely all fluff there’s definitely some emotional angst here because it wouldn’t be my fic if there wasn’t. 

****

And so we come to the end of what I actually wrote this year. Like I said... it wasn’t a lot and that’s totally cool. You gotta just live and let live, you know? But I figured I’d add a few projects / things I’m working on and want to work on for 2021. To sort of even it out in a sense.

1. finding one’s footing

Yeah. This is definitely on the list of things I want to work on this year. I really hate having unfinished works out there and usually don’t start posting a fic until it’s written or almost entirely written just in case things happen in my life and I just can’t get to writing on it. But I was really excited about this fic and wanted to post it as I went. And then the pandemic hit and all my creativity and writing drive disappeared. I do hope to continue it and make progress on it / finish it this year. 

2. letting go  sequel (commentary ask on the sequel)

It’s not secret that people have been wanting a sequel to this fic since basically the second I posted it. And to be totally honest here, I was a bit worried to write it back then because I knew it was going to be not as pro-Liv as I thought people wanted. I didn’t want to bash her or Aaron at all, but I was afraid that people would be really upset at me for daring to question Aaron or make him actually confront the fact that his sister got his boyfriend arrested and Aaron literally seemed to not understand why Robert was upset. And I was really new to writing in the fandom so I didn’t want to cause any disturbances. But now it’s been a few years and I no longer am that concerned about it. People who want to read it will, and those who don’t won’t. And if I get some drama and hate for it, well that’ll be exciting wouldn’t it? My last hateful anon was about Supernatural which was WILD. 

3. 2017 rewrite where Robert finds out he’s got a secret kid after Aaron goes to prison. 

So I’ve written a few snippets of this verse and just really love the idea of dad!Robert and thought that he was the perfect character to have a random kid turn up and turn everything upside down. So I wanted to write one and while there’s so many times that this will upset everything... I figured when Robert was frayed at the seams and Aaron’s in prison and Liv’s acting up was the perfect time for this kid (who’s Noah but not Charity’s kid cause I didn’t want to make up a new kid... *shrug*) to turn up. This is going to have a much healthier relationship between Liv and Robert because as much as she annoys me now, they had such potential in this storyline to actually build Robert and Liv up to being something of a father/daughter unit since they never were going to go there with Aaron. And the drama / tension for Aaron when he is released and for him to see that relationship and the relationship that Robert now has with this kid who Aaron doesn’t know... it’s my favorite kind of tension. 

4. Pub Share AU 

So it’s not really written in any real way, but the general idea is that Robert does end up buying Diane’s half of the pub in 2015-2016. This leads to Aaron and Robert sort of becoming friends of a sort even though Chas hates that Robert’s there. It’s just basically a small rewrite of the 2016 and trial era where they’re already friends and just the tension of living and working around someone you still have intense and complicated feelings for and sneaking around and the also slow burn of enemies (ish) to friends to lovers is just really good. 

5. And I’m honestly probably going to end up writing a Supernatural fic because that’s just who I am now and what I’m about where Dean ends up adopting Claire and Jack in a non-hunter AU. 

Look, I’m going to level with you all... I played The Witcher 3 this year and now all I care about is writing about kids being happy and my favorite characters learning to be fathers. I can’t help it... I just love the idea of this fic because I adore Claire. And after the resurgence of Supernatural in a sense, I remembered how much I love Dean (though he is hitting a bit closer to home now that I’m over 30... but we’re not going to get into that.) 

So yeah... that’s that. It’s not really what it was supposed to be... but I answered it. That counts right? 

I do have plans to work on and/or finish some of these this year but I cannot guarantee anything. I also am just going to let my inspiration and muse take me where it wants to go and work on whatever I want to work on in the moment. I might try to do some more wip wednesday snippets (when I actually start writing again) so anyone who follows me can see what I’m actually working on and just to try and get back into the habit of actually working on my stuff.  💖

#feel free to come and talk to me about any of this cause i do like hearing from people and want to write things people want to read #i sort of wish i'd written more this year but i really haven't #but i do like the idea i came up with and the things i want to work on in the future #robron #chatting about my writing #my writing #i'm gonna tag it here so it's all in one place

[askbloatedbellyblog]

Update: AKA wtf did you go AB3

Alright everyone, now that my birthday is over, I thought I should give everyone an update on why I’ve sorta disappeared. 

Well first off, life and work got extremely busy. I’m been trying to accomplish some real life goals and have made some success, got super stressed out with too many things to do and even quit a place I’ve worked at for nearly 6 years for mental health reasons even though I then worked there for another 6 months after. yeah it was super weird.

I’ve had anxiety for a while and some of the stuff I was doing was trying to get over it by confrontation, lessen some by getting out of situations, and pursuing dreams.

Now that doesn’t mean that I’ve forgotten bellies or anything else either, just been stretched thin. Or so I thought.

So what I chalked up to getting old I’m not really old just thought “aging” and apparently this is fairly common with what I will lay out and anxiety sometimes to an extreme with more panic attacks and depression which I’ve always dealt with and have been going to therapy for, which I suggest for anyone, lack of focus, ADHD, muscle aches, tiredness (which I thought was from bad sleep habits), etc; weren’t exactly what I thought they were.

I’m a fairly fit person. I workout or had but again motivation was waning or being busy but also gets to this in a second nearly every day, I don’t eat TOO badly, I sleep way worse than I should but okay, take vitamins etc. Recently leaned on energy drinks too much but oh well. But I’ve had some bad foot pain and other ailments for a while. I’ve not had a ton of money, thought part of it was from tile floors or planter fasciitis (basically a tendon injury that can be caused by over use and flat feet, which guilty). 

So after finally reaching deductible for the year, I finally went to the doctor and discovered that somehow I have peripheral neuropathy. Meaning somehow my nerves are messed up. I can move fine, but I was told my “sensory nerves were worse than an 80 year old” and that why my leg/feet were on fire. Usually this happens with advanced diabetes which I don’t have (as far as they can tell and said I’d know it by the time this would have happened). 

It’s really great to hear that your nervous system is all jacked up and you didn’t know it. I’m still trying to figure out a legit diagnosis with a few of the blood tests I’ve had be fairly normal. It still could be something with my thyroid, maybe cancer, MS, who knows. I’m still trying to get in to see other doctors to try to see what is going on, though I have a sneaking suspicion and so far way less serious than all that.

At the casual suggestion of the doctor who did my nerve test because it “helps the nerves”, I took vitamin b12. I’ve taken some before and its in BASICALLY everything as far as anything fortified, the multivitamin I take, energy drinks, cereal, you name it. It’s in there to SOME degree. Well I’ve been having digestion issues as of late (wondering if I really had like IBS or Celiac etc) so I thought “You know what, I’ll buy one of those gummy versions so I can chew it up better and see what happens.” Well boy howdy, did that affect things and not necessarily for the better at first. I had bought both a b12 gummy and a b complex and the complex happened to have a different form of b12 than is usually in all those shelf stable fortified version of food. It was the “active” version of the vitamin (because apparently there are 4 different types, who knew).

Have you ever wanted to know what it’s like to feel like you’re on fire? Or to have your whole body be electrically charged? Well basically that’s what happened. Still happening to a degree. Still trying to find out for sure (which apparently is very hard to find doctors well versed in it because it does have symptoms similar to other diseases and not always present in the blood) but it looking pretty likely I have pernicious anemia. SUPER fun let me tell you. Not sure if it’s going to be a forever thing or just somehow got a b12 deficiency but I’m really starting to suspect actually a family history with it and not having things connected together.

Normal people don’t react to vitamin B12, even if they take too much, they just pee it out. But when I’ve taken it especially at first (it’s a known issue that it can have worse symptoms when you first start getting B12 again because your system finally is screaming GIVE ME ALL THE THINGS) I’ve gotten worse symptoms of pain, migraines, spreading nerve pain, lung, heart issues, breathing, stamina, everything out the window for a little bit. Being on fire but knowing you have to deal with it as best you can is super fun let me tell you. In  a perfect world, I’d actually get shots for it but that requires finding a doctor who believes it. The big problem is that some people don’t find out they have it for YEARS and by then nerve damage is permanent. If you act fast it can be reversed. I don’t want to ruin my shot at getting better while I can. 

Now the good news is so far, I have been getting better! It’s early days but nerves are less on fire. I’ve been getting energy up, libido is better, mood is better, breathing is getting better, heck even my digestion and heartburn have been getting much better. Not perfect but improving. Hell I didn’t even realize it was an issue but I had a night a bit ago where I was tingling all over in my legs and feet and suddenly could move my pinkie toes more than I ever remember being able to. So things are communicating and trying to recalibrate. 

Fun fact: did you know lack of B12 can cause anxiety, panic attacks, depression, insomnia, sleepiness, dementia, lack of focus, bowel issues, nerve damage and more? So my anxiety and depression (not saying I’m fixed or that it will go away by any means) could be linked to chronic lack of b12? That lack of being able to concentrate and focus could also be symptoms? Did you know that if you have absorption problems (bingo from intestinal issue) and taking heart burn medication (also a check mark because have fought it for years) can cause b12 deficiency? Because you need the stomach acid to digest it and have it in your colon? WELL I KNOW NOW LET ME TELL YOU WHAT. Did you know that working out burns more B12 and so does stress and anxiety? So its very possible that because I have been working out and super stressed that I actually made the problem worse by using up what little stores of B12 I had? SUPER GREAT let me tell you. 

So while I’m still trying to get to a doctor and hopefully don’t have something more serious, it seems likely that I’ve had a chronic B12 deficiency for years and it may have just not been in the right form for me to use despite ingesting a ton and then the cycle just made it worse. It could be a long road with maybe some permanent issues but I’m hopeful things are looking up even though it seems like it’s kind of a two steps forward, one step back kind of process with some relapses even though there’s progress. I still get worried and stressed about my condition and hate being in pain and weak and probably over research on whats going on (also still hoping that it’s not something more serious) but considering I’m making improvements and doing so fairly quickly all things considered makes me okay and hopeful I’ll be better than ever and able to accomplish more and not worry that I’m “getting old” when I’m pretty young.

Where does this leave me and this blog? Well it’s not going anywhere. I still exist, I’m still pining for bellies or muscle in my own way, and while it’s been slow thanks to health, lack of time, and lack of motivation; I do have some stories I’ve been working on and hopefully can get back to more canons. I do like being creative and trying to think of new things, even if I do tend to reuse a lot of ideas sometimes. Hopefully everyone will still stick around to support me even if I’m absent for a bit either on Tumblr, Twitter, or wherever else. I’m sorry for sometimes dropping conversations from being busy or procrastinating or social anxiety. Maybe that will get fixed with this. I’m honestly horrible at being the first one to start a conversation or pick it up again, so bug me first please.

Congrats if you’ve made it this far in my big life update/rant/manifesto? Thank you those who gave me birthday wishes. I luckily was healthy enough to go out and have some fun and I think I’m well enough to rejoin society again though there may be some pain. Thanks everyone for sticking with me over the years in all the places I’ve been and for enjoying all the weird ideas and writing that I’ve done to torture various characters. I hope to continue to do so for years to come. 

Laters!

AB3

#mun speaks #health yo #everyone take b12! #apparently SUPER IMPORTANT #don't be a young old man like me #Hopefully I will grace everyone with a late christmas story soon I nearly finished #also everyone watch dr stone #Its my favorite

[nerdylittleshit]

Thoughts about Spn 13x12

SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS!

Great Episode. Many things to love. And also very meta-ish? Like, there were several moments where I looked at my screen and just thought “I see what you did there”. Definitely lot of things worth a second look, discussion and speculation. So, without further rambling, let’s get to it.

There is no I in Team

Especially if there is no team to begin with. I bet these are the moments where Cas admitted to himself that Crowley wasn’t that bad after all. I love that Cas didn’t even consider for a single moment to work together with Lucifer, that he only used him to break out (and only after he learned that Mary was in danger) and stabbed him at the first opportunity he got. Also, apparently Cas’s new superpower is to sit and wait and annoy everyone around him long enough until he gets where he wants to (I mean this worked for me as a teenager as well).

What this episode proved is that Lucifer without his power is a useless character. His one defining characteristic is that he is one of the most powerful and therefore dangerous beings, who just looks down on everyone. Take his power away there is not much left besides a man who hates everyone, and that is just pathetic. And to contrast this, we have Cas, who is a fully flashed character, who is above all things kind, and loyal and devoted. What is so special about Cas is not his powers or the fact that he is an angel, but who he is, as a person. Lucifer is not a person. And to further contrast this Cas tells him about Jack, about the things he likes, about the good in him. He never mentions Jack’s powers, the only thing he has in common with his father. Only time will tell how Jack will react to his father however. Still, all Lucifer talked about was the absence of his powers and the only time Cas talked for a longer time it was about Jack, the person, not the Nephilim.

I have seen a few complains about the Casmodeus-plot or rather people feeling like it had no use, now that Cas is free and will be reunited with the brothers. I have to admit I wasn’t invested in the Casmodeus-plot and had no real desire to see him further interacting with Sam and Dean. We already had this storyline with Casifer. If anything it is about time they set up a safe-word to make sure Cas is really Cas in the future. I think the purpose of Casmodeus was to explain Cas’s absence and at the same time to find a reason why Sam and Dean are not worried about him. It is possible though Yockey simply thought it was a stupid idea to begin with. I mean Lucifer says that shapeshifting wasn’t one of the powers he gave to Asmodeus, which might be Yockey’s way of saying it was entirely Bucklemming’s idea. And really, they could have explained Cas’s absence with him actually looking for Jack. The random demon says they have plans for Cas however, so there might be a reason why he had to be Asmodeus’s prisoner. I also thought that it was odd that Sam and Dean hadn’t filled in Cas at this point. Why wouldn’t they tell Cas that Jack is missing, especially when Cas(modeus) called every day and asked about him?

There were also a few shout-outs to the audience: Cas being called a pretty boy, Lucifer bringing up the nurture vs nature debate and Cas saying that Jack looks nothing like Lucifer (because he looks like Cas).

The queen is dead, long live the queen

Y’ALL, ROWENA IS BACK! I know I said that before, but ever since her storyline is no longer tied to Crowley’s she has become such an interesting, layered, complex character. She has been around for such a long time and every time we see her we learn a bit more about her, but there is still so much left to explore.

Speaking of Crowley though, Rowena of course greets the Winchesters the same way her son did (“Hello boys”), which might mean she is gonna replace his role in the narrative. And to be honest she is the only character that I would allow to do that. Also, we finally see someone mourn Crowley. For all the hate between Rowena and her son, I always doubted they actually wanted to see each other dead, even though they tried to kill each other. Crowley was the only link left to Rowena’s past, to the woman she was before she became a witch, to her humanity. She doesn’t care that he died as a hero, because it means he is still dead, still not with her, because the only way she can love is in a selfish way. (I wonder if she tries to bring him back from the dead?)

The biggest emotional depth about this episode was that it acknowledged Rowena’s abuse at the hands off Lucifer and with that Sam’s shared trauma as well. Which was such a huge thing, and honestly the conversation between Sam and Rowena in the car was the best part of the episode for me. 11x10 was the turning point in Rowena’s story, because it was back then when she revealed to Crowley why she hated him, because her son was a constant reminder of his father using her and that love was nothing more than a weakness. And then moments later Lucifer killed her and I remember how angry I was after the episode because just as Rowena’s was revealed as a victim of abuse she died of the hands of yet another abuser. And not only once, but twice, admitting that Lucifer showed her his true face. Rowena is scared and she is scared all the time, which is paralyzing for someone as powerful and powerhungry as her. She believes the only way to end this fear is to kill Lucifer, once and for all.

Sam of course can relate. He has seen Lucifer’s real face as well, which creates a certain kind of intimacy between these two. And just as Rowena Sam can’t outrun his abuser. After his time in hell Lucifer first returned as Hallucifer in season 7 and later from the cage wearing one of his best friends and invading his home in season 11 (and next week he will learn that Lucifer is back once again). And yet Sam knows that nothing they will do to Lucifer will make the fear and the feeling of being helpless ever disappear. And despite Sam caring around this trauma for eight years, I don’t remember it has ever been addressed so directly. In the end Sam gives Rowena the page to unlock her power nevertheless, hoping she (and maybe he as well) will find some peace with it (also glad they didn’t keep that a secret for too long).  

So what does that mean for the future? For one thing I am sure Lucifer has to die. Either through Rowena or Rowena and Sam together or Lucifer sacrifices himself as part of a redemption arc. Honestly though, after this episode and the painful reminder who Lucifer truly is I doubt he will get a redemption arc (another “no, thank you” from Yockey to Bucklemming?). Also, we learned that all this time Rowena wasn’t even operating on full power. With Rowena having all her magic back she could become the real big bad in the end. Though I would rather have it if after she kills Lucifer she realizes that all that power doesn’t bring her happiness and lets her magic go and becomes human again.  Also, that whole scene where she gets her powers back? Kudos to both Ruth and Amanda Tapping. That was such a huge powerful feminist scene. And were her eyes blue in the end or purple? Her magic has always been purple, so that would make sense, and so far we have only seen blue eyes with angels. Hmmm.

Sibling mirrors

Say what you want about Jamie and Jennie but I really liked their clothes/style. Anyway, they were meant as one big dark mirror for the Winchesters, trying to bring back their dead mother, and willing to kill everyone around them for it (at least flower guy died smiling). This is the same as Sam releasing the Darkness in order to save Dean from the MoC or Dean threating Kaia in order to save Mary. None of these things have been portrayed as positive however and in the end the sisters kill each other, which is enough of a statement for the brother’s codepency.

So, let’s talk about the love spell a bit, because Yockey did manage to sneak in a lot of Destiel stuff. First they mention that a true love’s kiss can wake you up, and obviously fandom has been giddy about the idea of Cas saving Dean from the spell through a kiss. Then we have Dean coming back, telling Sam it is time to call Cas, and the very next thing he says is that he is in love. Ahem. Dean wants Jaime to move in, because this is big time, and well who already has a room in the bunker? Cas of course. Dean calls Jaime his soulmate and talks about cosmic fate, both terms that have been used in a million fan fiction. Dean acting under a love spell is basically how most people imagine Dean to act once Destiel finally becomes canon. And isn’t it great that the only time we see Dean kissing a women this season is through a love spell, resulting in literary false love? Like the only way Dean is even remotely interested in anyway is through a spell. Because he is of course already in love. Also bless Rowena for asking about the fifth base (I had to look this up though, poor sheltered girl that I am).

So let’s talk a moment about Sam. I love that they continue to address his depression, that they have finally fully acknowledged his trauma caused by Lucifer and him opening up to Dean. For as much as the first half the season focussed on Dean’s grief I hope we get the same attention for Sam now. Despite being around for 12,5 years Sam at times still feels like a blank page and in some ways to fault is with the writers who seem to focus more on Dean than Sam. So, I’m all in for more of Sam’s struggle. Here he admits that his way of coping was to come up with a plan: helping Jack and through that being able to save Mary. Now both Jack and Mary are gone, there is no plan B and the MoL library is as useless as usual (seriously the only helpful book in there is the Grimoire and seeing that AU!Kevin used a spell to open the rift I wonder of Rowena could help them saving Mary and Jack). Without his plan Sam has nothing left to distract him, to shield him from the pain he is going through. Sam looked at a horrible situation and tried to make the best out of it, looking at the options he still had. Dean mourned different; he was in no state to even begin to hope or to form a plan. Dean drowned in his pain until Cas come back, until he had his win, and only after he was able to function again. Sam however had ignored said pain until Jack was gone as well, and now it is crushing him. Obviously I want Sam to get better as well, but for now I love that the show explores his emotional journey and I hope we see a bit more of it in the upcoming episodes.

Until next week, when my review will look like this: DANNEEL! DANNEEL! DANNEEL!!!!!

#supernatural #spn 13x12 #various and sundry villains #spn meta #spoilers #my meta

[seenashwrite]

The Midwife: Part One

Status: Complete (1 of 4) Word Count: 3K Category: Mini-series; Behind-the-scenes canon compliant; Historical; Mystery; Teamwork; On-the-hunt   Rating: Teen & Up Character(s): Various O.C.s; References to familiar people/places Pairing(s): N/A  Warnings: None Overall Summary: In the mid-1950s, a member of the New York City chapter of the Men of Letters is sent to the United Kingdom to assist with what appears to be another stack of cold case dead-ends, when he suddenly finds himself questioning one of his closest-held convictions. 

          *~* The Midwife : Master Post *~*

There was once a small pocket of unmoved time in Kansas, about half a century's worth, and it came to an end simply, no magic required. A turn of a key in a lock, two sets of steps across a threshold, then it was over, just like that. Simple maneuvers were in contrast with the Men of Letters' old hat routine but the new occupants of their abandoned shelter under Lebanon favored such actions when they had the option.

These legacies were not alone in that position, though they may have found the premise hard to swallow as the years went by, as their knowledge grew. Their encounters with a few of the more interesting members of their inherited fraternity would have done little to convince them otherwise. Seeing is believing, and what-have-you.    

Proof. Tangibility. Something solid, something that could be held in the hand, studied, documented. Rumor meets research meets methodology. Hunter meets weapon meets monster. So, in that respect, more Men of Letters than not.

No one would have faulted the Winchester brothers for missing the typewriter at the very back of the lowest, farthest space, under the rotting table, inside the water-damaged and disintegrating box, completely covered by shadows and cobwebs in that brick-walled cellar of a storage room.

Perhaps some fault - they had lived there for years by the time the typewriter's keys began to move for the first time in decades - maybe that room should have long been discovered, its items sorted. The youngest would have found the books of value, slightly molded as they were. The eldest most assuredly would have found the vintage weaponry of interest, if not use.  

Should they ever go hunting in their home, and should that hunt take them to the dark corner, and the box, and the rusted device, a yellowed paper wrapped on the roll, filled with words in faded ink would await them, though they'd need to be timely: things of such nature do eventually tend to fall to pieces.

Kendricks Academy, just outside London - 1956

.

I've heard it said that if you question your own sanity, then the thought in-and-of itself means you're not. Insane, that is. I found that reasonable, though I suspected many a lunatic had to have felt it creeping on, so reason, yes; comfort, no.

Burt flicked a tiny paper ball across the huge library table to get my attention, and I tilted my head slightly in his direction, met mischievous eyes with my own, ones I suspected were dull and glazed-over and a step shy of insanity. A small snicker was my confirmation, and it was quickly shifted into a mild throat-clearing when our monotone host glanced over his shoulder in our direction. Undeterred, the long, thin stick in his hand went back to pointing - poking, really - at the projected data on the wall, the droning getting right back on track.

This was how I'd die.

He was such a promising young man, they'd write. Twenty-four, taken long before his time, found still sitting up in the chair, his beloved research scattered around him. He is survived by an incredibly angry fiancée, bereft over the meticulously-yet-indecisively-planned wedding that shall never occur. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made in his name to the Men of Letters, United Kingdom Headquarters, London. Please earmark as funding for booze-filled credenzas in all meeting rooms.

It wasn't just the London chapter - my home chapter in New York City was filled with fellows who could bore with the best of them, and though I loved my job, this assignment was working my nerves. I'd thought my breaks in the cold cases department - especially the last one - would send me into the more active areas of our duties. Active without action, for the most part, but I would've happily taken it.

Instead they’d sent the Lily Sunder investigation on without me, then sent me across the pond, a stack of ice-colds awaiting me in the United Kingdom. And, of course, the not-so-brief briefings delivered in succession by brethren who grew increasingly brain-numbing. Thank heavens for Burt.

Per usual, he seemed to take everything in stride, easygoing to a fault. He was only around five years my senior, though his somewhat girthy physique and heavily balding scalp made him look older. And while he supported me in my desire to see what else our secret society had to offer, he seemed perfectly content languishing with the cold cases.

Even the fact that we'd been boarded at the school didn't seem to faze him, thin mattresses and bland food be damned. His pockets were always filled with candy, a bit grandfatherly, but I found myself grateful. I'd taken to munching whenever he did, and after almost three weeks, my waistband had started to protest - made sense why Burt was perpetually suspendered. Still, I took the offered piece of wax-wrapped taffy as we walked back to the dormitory.

"No more bubblegum?" I asked, pulling the sticky wad in two before I stuck it in my mouth.

"Nah," Burt replied, talking around an entire piece of taffy settled into his cheek, where it was causing a giant bulge. "Got in my mustache the other day."

"Stop blowing bubbles."

"Then what's the point, Jacky?"

"Got me."

"Say, you heard anything from home?"

"Colleen changed her bouquet again."

"I meant Lily."

"No, lilies were three bouquets ago."

"The Sunder case, you moron."

"Ah. No. Last time I asked, Peterson said it was now 'eyes only'." I capped off my response with rolled eyes, then went ahead and stuffed the other half of the taffy in my mouth. Burt knew better. I hated talking about it.

"Still makes me mad," he replied in a sympathetic tone.

"Nothing makes you mad."

"Well, that did! Jack, you're the one that found the lead, confirmed the Canada sighting---"

I sighed. "Burt---"

"And for pity's sake, the Nephi---"

I hocked my taffy into a nearby bush before I stopped in my tracks, turned, gripped his forearm. "Burt!" I hissed, glancing up and down the walkway. 

Smatterings of students were still lingering and walking about, most headed into the common areas or their next class. And though we were outside, I still couldn't believe he was speaking so loudly, so casually. Saying that word aloud at all.

Burt's brow creased slightly and those always-rosy cheeks pinked up a notch, but then he swallowed his taffy and grinned. "Wanna skip that lukewarm, eighty-percent-dough-shepherd's pie in the canteen, head to a pub? I know one that serves actual hot meals, overfill the pints...." He trailed off in a slightly sing-song voice, wiggled his eyebrows so much they almost hit the rim of his cap.

I sighed again, then shrugged my shoulders. "Why not?"

It wasn't simply that they'd taken what I'd come to consider my case away from me. It was the nagging feeling I had that despite the fact Sunder had caused no harm to civilians to our knowledge - well, excepting herself - the Men of Letters' continued interest in her was more than just loose-end tying. No reason but the pangs in my gut to think it was some kind of vendetta. Then they'd allowed more and more access to the files once my early, modest hypothesis showed promise, and I'd stumbled upon quite the reason during a fact-finding mission to the chapter house in Kansas.

House. Ha. Basement, more accurately, and the cold case guru there, Haggerty, was so excited to have company he would've let us redecorate the place in pastels if we'd asked nicely enough. Anything to keep me and Burt there longer, keep him occupied.

He was one of the more enthusiastic members, reminded me a lot of my father, truth be told. More into the metaphysical than I was, sure, but with a logical mindset. I understood why I'd been ordered to consult with him, given the nature of Sunder's appearance in the grainy photograph we'd obtained. The professor hadn't aged a day since the time she'd disappeared from what was left of her life, and our working theory was witchcraft.

Witchcraft didn't just mean magic in my business; it was one of several sub-classifications under the magical umbrella. And if you wanted the skinny on the workings of witches, you called on Haggerty. Even though he'd retired not long after we'd met, he never hesitated to get back in touch with any thoughts he had on the ideas I'd written to him about, the more far-fetched ones  I'd want to bounce off of someone before writing them up for field work consideration. Besides Burt, he was the most open-minded member of our little club. At least, that I'd ever encountered.

Which was why I was glad it was just Haggerty in the room with me when I'd had to sit down due to my shock, right there on the concrete floor, deep in the bowels of that small-town basement, just to the front of the rickety file cabinet I'd been plundering.

"You okay, kid? What's that you got there?" he'd asked.

In reply, I'd simply held out the folder to him when he'd come over and stooped down beside me.

He'd let out a low whistle, went from a stoop to taking a knee as he flipped through the papers. "This must've come from your neck of the woods, you know," he'd said cautiously. "Not sure I know how an old northeast recruitment file would've ended up here."

I knew.

They'd chalk it up to a mistake if I'd asked, a clerical error fifty-some-odd years gone, that the documentation should've gone to storage with anything else not germane to the ongoing nature of our work. Besides, they would say, it doesn't matter to the case, didn’t change the goal. Lily Sunder needed to answer for her meddling in otherworldly affairs, she needed to be monitored, needed to be questioned on her intentions.

But the truth was obvious - to me, to Burt, to Haggerty - that the real reason the file had been sent away from the New York house all those years ago was because they were embarrassed.

Sunder had refused no less than fourteen separate invitations to join the Men of Letters before the turn of the century. They'd been after her research talents since she was barely into adulthood, based on her early work in apocalyptic studies. They got more aggressive once her teaching career took off, and - judging by the verbiage in the copies of the letters they'd sent and the documentation of multiple recruitment trips to Maine - they were practically salivating over the thought of having a bonafide angel expert in their ranks.

"I still think it's why the Moles sent us here," Burt was saying, using our pet name for the ancient, die-instead-of-retire administrators in the Men of Letters.

He took large swig of beer to wash down the meat-and-two veg he'd just polished off. The rationing from the war had ended in the not-so-distant past, and it seemed all the cooks in the land - excepting the ones back at Kendricks, that is - were excited to get to do things up right again. Not that I had much of an appetite, but if we'd had to be banished, it had come at an ideal time, at least in that respect.

"We weren't banished."

Oh. I must've said that part aloud.

"Eat your food."

Burt was channeling his mother then - I knew because of the full British accent on all three words. His father was an American Mole, while his mother was the daughter of a very well-respected professor at Kendricks, not to mention all the uncles and cousins on both sides. Their family visited London for several months each year, so between that and hearing his mother every day, he was good for the occasional drift from American English, though he’d let loose around me from the jump.

There was some beef that kicked up off-and-on between the American and British leadership, and I never got invested, but a few of the older members in New York would dole out side-eyes and huffs at Burt's sporadic "pints" at "pubs", "mash" and "chips". It was more than the accent thing, though.

He kept close to the vest in general. I think because they weren’t shy about their resentment - some odd contempt for him for not being more of a go-getter, double legacy and all. Though about all that pedigree garbage, Burt couldn't have cared less. 

They didn’t know how hard he worked behind the scenes, how much Burt cared about our mission. Not how I knew. And I also knew how much he cared for me.

So I obeyed, eating a few bites of some of the best fish I'd probably ever had, and he went on.

"I'm telling you, them pulling us out here right after Sunder? It's not a coincidence. Tell me you're not thinking the same thing."

I set down my fork, wiped my mouth, then looked at him as seriously as I could manage. "If I think too much about it, I'm going to get mad. Besides, she's not out here, and they know it. She may've been, but it's not as if there's any way to determine it - she's been running since Zeppelins were all the rage. I don't know what it is, but it's not Sunder."

Burt pulled his small, leather-bound notebook from his inside pocket and untied the strings, ready to make his case. I started stuffing carrots I didn't want into my mouth so I wouldn't slip from my current irritation at his pressing into that anger I'd just warned him about. My best friend was an absolute mule.

"Wales: Llandudno - old Liddell summer home location - nothing.  Cairnholm - what was left of the Peregrine house - mild trace. You know how many kilometers we covered in Wales, total?"

"No idea, but I bet you---"

"Nine-hundred eighty-seven-point-eight, Jacko. You know how many miles that is?"

"Burt, are you going to be arriving at a point anytime in the near---"

"Then here," he continued, flipping a page. "Bloomsbury - former home of the Darlings - mild trace. All those random train depots - all the tunnels, ALL of them, Jack---"

"I was there," I said, downing the last quarter of my pint quicker than I should've, mentally crossing my fingers that his end point would have an actual theory behind it this time.

"---and we only confirmed potential - just potential - trace on one."

"You do recall when they ponied up about already knowing all this? I wanted to punch that guy."

"The short fella, the white-haired gentleman, who likely would've died on the spot if you had done?"

"Yup, that’s the one," I shot back casually, then glanced around. I caught our waitress' eye and held up my empty mug with what I hoped was a somewhat genuine smile. Burt was still going.

"All-in-all, not a definitive sign of an active hidey-hole to be found."

"I hate when you call them that."

"Window, door, aperture, passage, thinning, portal - still a hole. I stand by it."

"Fine."

"Kirke estate - every single room - not even a hint of anything."

"I'm going to rescind your best man status if you keep this up."

"Colleen can’t stand me, she'd be thrilled. Hell, Jack, make it her wedding present for all I care."

I frowned. “Jeez, Burt. What is with you?”

Then he frowned. “I was actually listening to their briefings. Were you?”

"Barely," I replied honestly. "They're sending us on follow-up field trips that first year initiates should be handling, and I actually miss our office and the city and my family and even that stupid tiny room in that overcrowded chapter house."

"And your fiancée."

I gave him a look. "I'm tired of chasing down what have always been children's stories with bits of truth in them somewhere. Bedtime tales that have been around long enough - plenty long enough - that if there were anything important to them, the Moles would've sussed it out when they were initiates."

Thankfully the waitress brought over our next round then, and I set into mine like a man just crawling in from the Sahara.  

Burt huffed at that, then said, "Tomorrow's the first time we're going somewhere that's not a rehash. You didn't notice anything new and different about the briefing today?"

"That it's the closest I've gotten to empathizing with the undead."

He flipped his notebook around to face me and planted a finger above several sets of numbers. "Exact latitudes and longitudes, exact area of square kilometers to cover." He flipped another page. “And here's the inns we'll be staying in. We're gonna be gone for a few weeks, and I know it's not just a hop-skip from here, but this shouldn't take more than four or five days, give-or-take.”

I set my mug down slowly, scanning over the notes quickly. He was right. I raised my eyes to his. He grinned when he saw he finally had my interest.

“I think they might've been testing us with all this other stuff, make sure we were accurate on the traces we'd found, see how thorough we were in following up with any living witnesses, how detailed we were in reports. I think this trip is why we're here. Because if I wanted to whip up a nice little spread, keep people away from my hidey-hole? This is exactly the type of place I'd put it.”

I stared at him for a few moments, my normally whirring, ever-processing mind at a complete standstill.

Now he leaned in closer. “And I think I have an idea about how it connects to the Sunder case - to your theory.”

Burt wisely didn't say the word - though the volume of the pub's patrons would've likely drowned it out anyway - and instead just kept studying my face.

“Spit it out,” he finally ordered.

I inhaled and exhaled a deep breath, glancing down at the scribbled locales, then back up, obeying Burt once more.

“What in damnation do they think is out on the moors?"

Feedback makes my ❤️ go boom

See Nash Write : Master  |  See Nash Write : Mobile 

🏷️🏷️Wanna be tagged? Hit me up! 🏷️🏷️

#Supernatural Fanfiction #SPN Fanfic #Nash Writes

[swipestream]

SUPERVERSIVE: Ultra Sun, Uranium, and the Quest for the Perfect Pokemon Game

I’ve thought deeply for awhile of how to approach this article. So it’ll be a bit long, but hopefully you’ll find it interesting. I’ll be going forward with the assumption that everyone knows the basic core concepts behind the pokemon franchise. And hey, even if you, specifically, don’t, I know the audience is out there.

You see, I’m a HUGE Pokémon fan. I grew up with the series but I like to think I’m pretty good at separating my opinions from nostalgia goggles. The games are just GOOD. The core concept behind the games is good. And Game Freak, whatever you might think of them, clearly puts a lot of care into the series. These games are more than cash grabs, there’s clear passion, and a willingness to listen to fan complaints.

I’m serious. A common complaint about the Pokémon games is that they are stagnant. They don’t try new things, they don’t innovate, they’re basically the same game. But look at the reviews of each game when it comes out. EVERY SINGLE ONE – literally – is complimented specifically for the different things it brings to the table.

Complaining that every Pokemon game is too similar is like complaining that My Hero Academia “just follows the standard Shonen formula”. Of course it does! The Shonen formula is REALLY GOOD when executed properly, and broad enough that you can get a lot of variety out of it. Ditto Pokémon.

Lately I’ve been going through a lot of Pokémon fan games. Pokémon Glazed, Prism, and Light Platinum are all good, especially Glazed. I recommend them all. But the king, by far the best Pokémon fan game I’ve played – maybe just the best Pokémon game ever made (we’ll get to that) – is Pokémon Uranium.

And it is this game, along with Pokémon Ultra Sun, a gen 7 mainline series Pokémon game, that I will be discussing here.

Uranium is the game made by people like me, for people like me: Millennials who grew up with the series who wanted to see a game that was more difficult without getting absurd, with a story that was more adult without getting grimdark just for the sake of it, and with a more serious tone that nevertheless kept underneath it all that same goofy Pokémon spirit. Things in Uranium get dark – REALLY dark. I won’t go into detail because I don’t want to spoil the entire story, but there is one particularly eerie moment maybe halfway or so through the game where you and your rival fly through the air on the back of a Pokémon Ranger’s Staraptor (the Rangers are in this game, and we’ll get to that). In a very brief cutscene we see in the background nuclear fallout spread over the recently evacuated city while an otherworldly version of the classic Pallet Town theme plays in the background. It’s shocking to see, it’s creepy, it recognizes that the player is going to be someone familiar with the series’ history, and I absolutely loved the game for having it.

And yet, despite all of that, never in the game did I feel things get depressing, or needlessly cruel, or lose their sense of fun and adventure.

The story goes that ten years before the plot proper starts your mother disappeared after a nuclear reactor meltdown, presumed dead. The ensuing fallout caused the pokemon in the immediate area to mutate into nuclear pokemon, hyper aggressive glowing green versions of normal pokemon with a brand new typing, the nuclear type, strong against everything but nuclear and steel but weak against everything but nuclear. At the time the game starts you are living in Moki Town with your aunt. After your mother’s disappearance your father buried himself in work and is now living in the region’s capital city as Chief of the Pokémon Rangers. At the age of (I believe) 12 you join your younger and brattier neighbor Theo, pick out your starter, and go off on your Pokémon adventure. What follows are trips into massive underground tunnels ruled by man-eating ants, a mysterious villain who seems to be intentionally causing nuclear meltdowns around the region, becoming the hokage of a clan of ninja, and more…a lot, lot more.

This project was a labor of love in every way and it shows. Your father being the chief of the Pokémon Rangers is a stroke of genius, connecting side games that are technically canonical yet all but ignored in mainline Pokémon releases and integrating them into the plot in a meaningful way that actually has an impact besides “Look, it’s there!” The pacing of the story is seamless, inserting major plot events at the proper places in the narrative without feeling like a reason to artificially jack up the story.

The world is huge, with a full 13 towns and 16 routes, plus a huge roster of original pokemon. And not only is it huge, it feels connected. An example:

At one point in the game you need to surf across a large stretch of water to get to a city on the opposite edge of the map. The game could just let you swim right across, dodging around and battling trainers moving in set patterns. Instead, you get periodically ambushed by a group of ninjas, eventually culminating in a fight with the hokage. After you win, congrats, you’re hokage now!

This comes back into play later when you have to travel to the ninja hometown and are ambushed by pirates. Sure enough who rescues you but, yes, your now-loyal ninja clan from earlier. It’s great tiny details like this that make the game shine. This doesn’t even really connect with the main story, but it fleshes out your character’s role in this world in a way that’s amusing, visceral, and memorable: You did a thing, other people remember you did a thing, because you did a thing the way people react to you changes. Pokémon really shines in terms of immersion when it can pull off these sorts of touches, and Uranium gets it.

The specter of nuclear annihilation looms over the entire game

Uranium is, as you might expect, also REALLY hard in ways a mainline game can’t be. Here you’re expected to know how to play. Nothing is easy, but it’s all *possible* to do without insane grinding. I picked a grass type starter and had a devil of a time with the fire type gym leader because I expected to take him down with a ground type…except his Pokémon were FLYING-fire types. Luckily, the game gives you the ability to counter this; early on you see at least three different types of electric pokemon you can catch and train relatively quickly, and with some work it’s possible to get past the gym without insane overleveling. Pokémon Uranium absolutely demands you strategize. At one point I was forced to catch and use pokemon I’d never need again specifically to, not take down one pokemon, but get one large HIT off so they’d be softened up for later. And it was a blast.

There’s a ton of variety in the route designs, and oftentimes getting from one town to another feels like an achievement. Again, the game expects you to know how to play. If you depend too much on one Pokémon, or one type, or one strategy, you will be punished for it. Uranium is clearly attempting to recreate that same feeling that a kid got when he made it through Viridian Forest or Victory Road for the first time for adults, and it succeeds.

Now obviously the game is not perfect. The multiplayer is glitchy, and I think some of the route and gym design choices are puzzling, to say the least. But as a whole it is a love letter to the franchise and the players who grew up with it, and I can’t commend it enough.

All right. That’s Uranium. This is probably the part of the review where you expect me to go on about all of the places Pokémon Ultra Sun fails in contrast, how Nintendo is losing touch with its core audience, how Pokémon has lost the magic, yada yada yada.

I’m not going to do that. The truth is, Pokémon Ultra Sun is REALLY good. Sometimes it’s even great. However, for a few reasons I’d probably consider it the weakest of the mainline games I’ve played. It has flaws, and I’ll discuss those first before getting into what it gets right and how it compares with Uranium.

Sun and Moon starts off really, really, really slow and easy. It remains that way for far too long as well. It’s like the first hour and a half or more of the game is basically a tutorial. I don’t need one! Game Freak should know by now that a lot of its players are 20 year vets. Slap on an optional tutorial and be done with it.

A neat map of Alola

I hear so many people rave over Alola and I don’t get it at all. Alola is – and this will sound pretty harsh, but there you go – boring. Most of the routes look really similar (partially hurt by the loss of the traditional bird’s eye view – routes with the potential to look cool you can only see from a relatively limited angle, so it looks like Yet Another Road), and only a couple of the town designs can be called anything close to memorable. One of those memorable towns – a town made up of all docks connected to each other – is even just a stolen design from generation 3 (Pacifidalog Town). Making the games set on a tropical island was a mistake, as there is much less opportunity to create varied weather and landscapes. The fact that this game has the fewest routes and towns of any generation is absolutely shameful. There is no excuse for this on the most technologically advanced game engine used to date (well, until the Let’s Go games, but they’re generation 1 remakes).

The game is also badly railroaded. Now technically every pokemon game is pretty railroaded – you are supposed to do certain things in a certain order and can’t continue if you don’t. But you feel it this time. In previous games, and, yes, in Uranium – you would be traveling and doing things for yourself, because you wanted to, that weren’t necessarily connected with the overarching structure. In one example from above, you become Hokage of a ninja clan. In the generation 2 mainline games there is a short sidequest about getting a pokemon to move out of the way of the route you want to take, which involves you searching through houses in a town to find the proper tools to do it. You’re not doing this to save the world or stop the evil team, but because you want to get to the next gym and continue your adventure. Nobody from the overarching narrative is forcing this on you. In another section you go to catch a red Gyrados terrorizing a lake. While this technically connects to the larger narrative that isn’t WHY you’re doing it. You’re doing it because you want that pokemon and the gym leader asked for help. These small details are almost absent from generation 7.

And this really messes with immersion. The sense of impact to what you’re doing, its impressiveness, seems forced. Early games set you up as a prodigy – in gen 2 you even face the protagonist of the previous game again, who has apparently hidden high up in the mountains to learn the ways of battling like some sort of warrior monk. You’re supposed to be a prodigy here too, but battles are too easy. It’s more like everyone else just sucks, a lot. Luckily, this changes in a big way for the better, and we’ll get to that when it comes to the pros of the game (there are many!).

The Exp. All device, which when on gives the battling pokemon full exp. and half exp. to every other non-fainted pokemon, is also a huge mistake. The common criticism is that it’s like taking an easy game and playing it on easy mode. This criticism is correct, but there is another problem. The original item, the Exp. Share, which split exp in half between the battling pokemon and the pokemon holding the device, was a great idea. If you wanted to bring a new pokemon into your party you can bring it up to the level of the rest of your party quickly without messing up your battles or constant grinding. By splitting the exp with the entire party it misses the point of the original Exp share, and for your pokemon to catch up you need to go back to sticking the pokemon you want to train in front and swapping it out – meaning that you lose the advantage of having an Exp. Share in the first place!

So while good for younger players who have trouble raising a balanced team it’s a mess for players who are more interested in spending time training and getting to know the world.

Now for the good. I’ll first point out that I looked up the differences between Sun and Moon and Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon. The best I can say about it is that if my understanding of the original two games is correct…I probably would have hated the original games. Because they don’t get that much harder. The rival isn’t as big a part of the game. And the postgame is weak.

Happily, Ultra Sun gets MUCH, MUCH harder, your rival has a full character arc integrated seamlessly into the story, and the postgame is unbelievably good.

Oh yeah!

The postgame of Ultra Sun, at least as of right now, since Uranium is technically still updating – is better than Uranium’s by a VERY wide margin. An addition to Ultra Sun, that was NOT in the original Sun and Moon, is the Rainbow Rocket episode. Fruity name aside, this is a fantastic addition, designed specifically with long time players in mind. It brings back the major villains of almost every previous pokemon game and gets really, REALLY hard. Seeing all of the uniforms and people you recognize, complete with remixed versions of their classic soundtracks and smart callbacks, makes the purchase of Ultra Sun worth it almost by itself. In addition to this the series of boss battles that takes place starting near the end of the game jumps in difficulty dramatically. For the first time – and to my relief – I was required to really strategize in battles, coming up with different plans and ideas each time I lost as potential counters to my in-game opponents.

A new mechanic known as “Ultra Wormholes” is also a blast. By traveling through these interdimensional portals it is possible with some work to capture almost every single legendary pokemon in the franchise thus far – which is, needless to say, pretty freaking cool.

And…to my surprise…the story is actually pretty good? It’s probably the best story the games have ever had. The character development of Lillie is by far the best part of the game, and her family drama is actually, legitimately compelling. Your rival has a real character arc and the pacing is seamlessly integrated throughout the story. There is a tradeoff here, because by getting so story heavy you lose that sense that it’s a story YOU’RE creating, but the flip side of this is that by making the characters feel more real and the narrative more compelling you’re further sucked into the world in that sense. It’s no masterpiece by any means, but it’s easily the best story in a pokemon game and perfectly good on its own merits as well. This helps make up for a lot of the game’s other flaws with respect to immersion.

While this is not a new addition, the nifty mechanic where you get to groom, feed, and play with your pokemon is a nice touch, and it’s especially fun to see the relationships you build actually bear fruit in battle.

Ultimately, despite flaws, I had a blast with Pokémon Ultra Sun. For the hardcore pokemon fans like me, the Ultra versions are definitely the definitive gen 7 games. For more casual fans, you’ll definitely enjoy it as well.

Still, Uranium is a great example of a time where fans of a franchise were able to produce a product that the original company really couldn’t make. The difficulty curve of the game and more serious story were exactly what long time fans of the franchise were waiting for and what Game Freak really couldn’t provide even if they wanted to. While neither game is perfect, if I was to recommend one game over the other I’d recommend Uranium over Ultra Sun. It is a more classic Pokémon experience updated for an older generation, and I believe it has fewer big flaws than Ultra Sun, whatever its many benefits.

In any case, both games are definitely highly recommended.

SUPERVERSIVE: Ultra Sun, Uranium, and the Quest for the Perfect Pokemon Game published first on https://medium.com/@ReloadedPCGames

[victorluvsalice]

Magical Monday: V:tM Bloodlines Vampires in Sims 4, Part II

Okay, so, in the first part, we created our vampire in CAS. Now that they're out and about in the world, it's time to consider powers! What's the point of being a vampire if you don't get some magical bonuses on top of the whole bloodsucking and immortality business, after all? However, this bit was kind of tricky, as the two games handle powers in rather different fashions:

-->Vampire: the Masquerade -- Bloodlines: Each clan has access to three "Disciplines" -- a range of supernatural powers that said clan specializes in. (There's also the common "Blood Heal" and "Blood Buff," but we're focusing on the flashier stuff here.) Disciplines range from one to five "dots" and are leveled up via XP points which the vampire gets by doing quests. (Much like everything else on a vampire's character sheet -- what do you want, this is an adaptation of a tabletop RPG!). A given Discipline may be a set of five distinct powers that you gradually unlock as you level it up (such as Animalism giving you control over different kinds of spectral animals, or Protean giving you different bestial features until you get a full vaguely-werewolfy War Form), or one power that gets stronger and better as you level it up (like Auspex allowing you to see people's auras from farther and farther away and boost your wits and perception more and more, or Fortitude allowing you to "soak" more and more damage in combat). It's unlikely that you'll be able to max out all three Disciplines unless you cheat, or focus all your experience points on them to the exclusion of all else (not a recommended tactic).

-->The Sims 4: Vampires: Vampires are sorted by power levels -- you start out as a Fledgling, then progress through Minor, Prime, and Master, before finally maxing out at Grand Master. Each new title unlocks a new level of vampire powers -- each level has five distinct powers available for purchase. You level up by earning "power points," which your vampire gains by doing vampirey things -- drinking plasma, studying vampire lore, training , sparring, or outright fighting with other vampires, meditating darkly (yes, this is a thing), and using powers that have already been purchased. All powers cover one specific thing/effect, though a handful can be leveled up to provide greater effects -- these have three tiers, each requiring another expenditure of power points. You can theoretically get all powers, but some of the weaknesses you're required to take after leveling up (these will be discussed in another post) conflict -- if you take a weakness such as Thin-Skinned, which makes you more susceptible to sunlight burning you, you can't get Sun Resistance, which has the exact opposite effect. So unless you make sure none of your weaknesses conflict, you're probably not going to get every power.

I knew going into this that going power-by-power in the Disciplines wasn't going to work, so I focused on the general "theme" of each Discipline to match them up to roughly equivalent Sims 4: Vampires powers. Below is the list I managed to come up with:

Animalism

Theme: Influence over the Beast (a vampire's monstrous side) and commanding (spectral) animals

Clans: Gangrel, Nosferatu

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Tamed Thirst -- Grand Master power, prevents the vampire from randomly feeding on another Sim when their Thirst bar bottoms out (this is the closest I can think of to having any control over a vampire's more bestial nature)

Auspex

Theme: Seeing auras, boosts wits and perception

Clans: Malkavian, Toreador, Tremere

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Detect Personality -- Fledgling power, allows vampire to instantly determine the target Sim's personality traits

Celerity

Theme: Super speed

Clans: Brujah, Toreador

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Supernatural Speed -- Master power, allows the sim to run super fast

Dementation

Theme: Causing hallucinations and madness

Clans: Malkavian

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Cast Hallucination -- Fledgling power, makes a Sim talk to themselves

-Influence Emotion -- Grand Master power, has the vampire emit an "emotion bomb" that gives all Sims within a certain radius a chosen emotion (can be upgraded three times)

Dominate

Theme: Commanding others

Clans: Tremere, Ventrue

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Command -- Minor power, makes a chosen Sim do a specific activity (clean, sit, work out, etc.)

-Mesmerize -- Prime power, puts a chosen Sim into a trance

-Irresistible Slumber -- Prime power, drops a chosen Sim into a magical sleep

Fortitude

Theme: Lessens damage done to the vampire

Clans: Gangrel, Ventrue

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Sun Resistance -- Master power, reduces the damage the vampire takes from sunlight (again, as close as we get; can be upgraded three times -- but as the third level is actually PERFECT Sun Resistance, meaning vampires take NO damage from sunlight, you shouldn't upgrade it that far if you want to be true to Masquerade canon. I'd actually only take the first level for these two clans if you're going to use it)

Obfuscate

Theme: Invisibility

Clans: Malkavian, Nosferatu

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Mist Form -- Grand Master power, allows vampire to teleport around as a cloud of mist (it's as close to invisible as you can get)

Potence

Theme: Super strength

Clans: Brujah, Nosferatu

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Vampiric Strength -- Minor power, makes vampire stronger and thus more likely to win spars/fights (can be upgraded three times)

Presence

Theme: More charming and alluring to others

Clans: Brujah, Toreador, Ventrue

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Vampiric Charm -- Minor power, the vampire projects an aura that makes Sims find them more attractive (Flirty moodlets) (can be upgraded three times)

Protean

Theme: Animal features such as claws, and eventually transformation into a bestial form

Clans: Gangrel

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Bat Form -- Fledgling power, allows vampire to “fly” (actually teleport) around as a bat

Thaumaturgy

Theme: Blood magic -- steal blood from targets, boil their blood to make them explode, etc

Clans: Tremere

Sims 4 Equivalents:

-Manipulate Life Spirit -- Prime power, allows vampire to “feed” off a person’s “life spirit” -- which completely resets all their relationships to zero. (You can also “restore” life spirit to drained Sims -- I have no idea if this actually fixes their relationships or not)

-Deprive Needs -- Master power, allows vampire to empty the Hunger, Hygiene, Bladder, or Energy need bars of another Sim

Now, this list does NOT actually cover all the powers available to a Sims 4: Vampires vampire. Here are the leftover powers that I couldn’t match up to a Discipline:

Eternally Welcome -- Fledgling power, allows a vampire to enter any house without issue and lock and unlock any door in said house. A lot of the game involves sneaking into places where you shouldn’t be, so I’d say this power should be open to anyone. The whole “locking/unlocking any door” bit is most suited to the magic-focused Tremere.

Occult Student -- Fledgling power, allows a vampire to use less of their “vampire energy” (the combined energy/mana bar for vampires) in using their powers. Another one that is good for Tremere -- I just didn’t want to make it exclusive to them as the Fledgling in Bloodlines ends up a total powerhouse regardless of clan. Can be upgraded three times.

Garlic Immunity -- Minor power, makes a vampire immune to the nauseating effects of garlic (which is a vampire weakness in Sims 4). This is a must-get as Bloodlines vampires have no issue with garlic at all. (Well, unless you’re amused by your vampire being sickened by garlic. Maybe they had a mortal life allergy/hatred that carried over?)

Vampire Creation -- Minor power, allows a vampire to create other vampires. Another must-get, as only the thinnest of thinbloods cannot create vampires in this setting, and the protagonist is far from that. (In fact, they outrank most normal tabletop PCs in blood power.)

Child of the Moon -- Prime power, increases a vampire’s power point & vampire energy gain and skill building at night, gives their powers a greater chance of success at night, and gives them a Happy moodlet during night hours. This one is another “works well for Tremere but let’s not limit it to just them” power. (Look, Thaumaturgy is ALREADY way overleveled in Bloodlines -- I’m trying to balance things out a skoosh in here!) Can be upgraded three times.

Vampiric Slumber -- Prime power, increases a vampire’s vampire energy gain from sleep. Get this one at your discretion -- it’s useful, but my own vampires tend to rely mostly on Dark Mediation (which also gets you power points). Can be upgraded three times.

Dampened Emotions -- Master power, makes a vampire less susceptible to emotional changes (mostly by drowning them out via “Fine” moodlets of increasing strength). Another “at your discretion” one, though I don’t think it’s particularly suited to Toreadors or Brujah (who tend to be more emotional as part of their “hat”).

Odorless -- Master power, completely freezes a vampire’s Hygiene need. Well, Smiling Jack only bathes once in a blue moon and no one else seems bothered by his smell, so. . .I guess it depends on whether or not you want your vampire to have any reason to enter a bathroom (the Bladder need disappears when you become a vampire in Sims 4).

Beyond the Herd -- Grand Master power, completely freezes a vampire’s Social need. This seems suited for a more “evil” vampire, and again I don’t think it’s thematically appropriate for Brujah or Toreadors (ESPECIALLY Toreadors).

Immortal Pleasures -- Grand Master power, completely freezes a vampire’s Fun need. Buy at your discretion -- I think it fits best the Tremere (so they can do more studying) and Venture (more time for running businesses/vampire society).

So that’s powers done. Next week -- the downsides of being a vampire! Because there is no power without its price. . .

#magical monday #vampires #bloodlines to sims 4 #vamptober #this was TOUGH #like some of the powers clearly had direct matches #super speed super strength etc #but I was STUCK on Animalism and Fortitude for the longest time #because controlling animals is not a thing #and Sims 4 doesn't really have combat or damage to soak #I only came up with Sun Resistance for the latter because of one of my own experiences in the game #I played a male Gangrel who used the Discipline to sprint across some magical sunlight without dying #and I'm still not sure because dying in sunlight is one of the big weaknesses of Masquerade #but then again older and stronger vampires can suffer it briefly so #and yes it was an effort not to put every slightly-magical thing under 'Thaumaturgy' #Tremere are SO overpowered #I gotta play one sometime xD #queued