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devilfic · 11 months

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❝small favor❞

III. peters, peters, peters.

parts: previously / next plot: what’s in a name, anyway? pairing: mcu!peter parker x gn!reader. cw: angst, fluff, lots of feelings, lots of unresolved feelings, protective!peter, a whole lot of overthinking on your part, two steps forward one step back, j jonah jameson jumpscare. words: 4.5k.

a/n: don’t look at me,,, it has been almost THREE years since I updated this series. a lot has changed for peter in the mcu since then....... anyway hope you enjoy ^^

It’s such an ordinary name, “Peter”. There were probably a million Peters in the state of New York alone. Peters of all colors, shapes, sizes. Peters in high school. Peters who were fathers. Peters in punk bands. Peters working bodegas. Peters in retirement. Peters in your house.

Your hand is slack in his grip. His smile wobbles as you stare through your lashes, struggling to comprehend what you’ve just heard. Of course he would spring this on you when you’re least prepared to hear it.

When it becomes evident that you’re just going to sit there gaping like a fish out of water, Spidey releases your hand and backs away. Unconsciously, you follow.

Your knees dig into the arm of the couch, then your feet touch the floor one by one, all the while keeping eye contact with the Spider. Afraid he’ll slip away. He has a wall up all of a sudden. Every time you step too close he puts a little distance between you again.

“That was… not the best time to do that, huh?” Spidey- Peter is all over the place now. Your living room is as familiar to him as the name “Spidey” is to you, yet now both of you were out of your depth with either. “You know when you have a really good idea in your head, and then you say it out loud and it doesn’t sound as good as you planned? But you’ve already said it, so you’ve gotta stick by it-”

“Peter.” He stumbles at the name. So it definitely belonged to him. You feel strange calling him anything other than Spidey, “Why’d you tell me your name?”

“Peter”. Peter worries his bottom lip. You wondered if he did that all the time, discreetly, beneath the mask he’d chosen to leave up this time. “Because... I’m not good at stuff like this. You know? I’ve made a lot of mistakes. Trusted the wrong people, made stupid decisions. One thing they don’t prepare you for in superhero school is how to keep a secret identity. I mean, Iron Man had one for all of two seconds and I- well, I’ve never known life without one. So when I met you, and you never asked or bargained... I knew. You know? Not like when I was a stupid kid and didn’t really know. I knew. Even when you had the chance to unmask me, you never took it. It’s... my name. And it’s a lot. But I trust you.”

He stops worrying his lip. He’s still now, watching you through those prodding white eyes.

It’s weird. A week ago, you only knew the figure that was Spider-Man. Now, in your living room, half his face exposed and his name (such an ordinary name, and still so much) feeling full in your mouth, a boundary had been crossed.

No, not a boundary. A threshold. Your threshold. The threshold of this living room that was so familiar to him as Spider-Man, now being crossed for the first time. As “Peter”.

If Jameson was a fly on the wall, he’d have you tracking down every Peter within an eighty mile radius right about now.

You fall back against the arm of your couch and Peter reaches out to you, fingers outstretched but never confident enough to make contact. You look winded, you’re sure.

The only thing that snaps you out of it is when he pulls down his mask, “It’s late. You really should get some sleep. You’ve got work in the morning, right?”

He’s bouncing backwards, sliding your window up and gracefully climbing out onto your fire escape before you can call out with a weak “Peter!”

But your voice barely echoes after him into the night. He leaps off your fire escape and out of sight by the time you reach your window on shaky legs. His red and blue is nowhere to be seen, as if he’d never been there at all. Your stomach is doing flip after flip and you brace yourself against the window sill for some kind of support.

You’d known him for so long as Spidey—just Spidey—and yet this new name was finding a home on your tongue all the same.

As much as you would have liked to heed Peter’s warning, you, in fact, did not get any sleep.

You’d stayed in a weird, shocked daze from the moment he left, barely having the wits about you to crawl into bed. Even then, you continued to stare off into the dark wondering if, by some magic or cosmic design, you had made all this up in your head. Some mad blogger pretending to know Spider-Man. Know him so well that he kept record of your favorite snacks, had baked with you in your kitchen, had a favorite mug of yours, gave you his name. His real name.

But maybe it wasn’t real? Maybe he’d grown tired of being called Spidey, maybe he wanted to give you an alias that felt more natural? Perhaps he wasn’t a Peter. Maybe he was a Preston or a Pedro...

...but then he said he trusted you. And if Peter was a lie, then that too was a lie. And as much as your frenzied mind would have liked to entertain the idea, the reality was that there was no one else like you to him. What he had started with you had never been done before. Unless he was lying about that too, and Spider-Man never gave the impression he had that kind of time on his hands.

You felt like a little kid, sitting on your hands or busying yourself with menial tasks to distract yourself. He’d been wicked, that Peter, for giving you so much. His voice, his name, his trust. He’d given it all to you willingly. He trusted you. You could slap rhinestones on your forehead and start spinning from the ceiling like a disco ball right now.

Your jitters don’t go unnoticed by your boss, unfortunately, because your name is barked at you the minute you head for your third cup of coffee that afternoon. Nearly spilling it all over yourself, you brace for the inevitable, “Yes, sir?”

Jameson was an irritable man of average stature, but he carried himself like a blimp, inflating the space with his temper and bellow suffocating you all up the walls. He rarely spoke in an octave below a shout, and when he did, he was often working up to it. Your favorite day on the job thus far was when he’d come down with a serious case of strep throat, “Your last article was trash,” he delivers the news as a greeting, giving you no room to argue, “I need you to cover the Stark Charity Ball this Friday.”

You blink, “Me?”

“Am I talking to the coffee machine? Yes, you!”

The Stark Charity Ball had become an annual tradition over the years, an effort on behalf of the late Tony Stark and the surviving Pepper Potts to keep the dream of science alive. The ball was like any other rich person event: full of Forbes’ 30 under 30, the 0.001% of the 1%, and more PhDs in one room than you’d ever reasonably come across in your lifetime. It also wasn’t your scene. You make that clear, “It’s not really my scene.”

Exasperated, Jameson begins walking to his office. You know better than to not follow. “I don’t care if it’s not your scene,” he mocks you, “Jillian’s still out on maternity leave and I don’t trust any other bozos to get me the scoop I need. You, on the other hand, could pass for half-decent. That’s why I need you to make it your scene.”

“But sir, I do crime journalism. I’m not a… ‘stand around and ask billionaires what they think about the stock market’ type of journalist.”

“You won’t be asking about the stock market. You’ll be asking about Wilson Fisk.”

That catches your attention. You pass the threshold of his office, “Fisk? What for?”

Jameson takes a harsh swig of his coffee and starts ruffling one-handed through some files on his desk, “I have a few sources claiming he’ll be at the ball.”

“How’d he even get invited?” By no means was Fisk so socially controversial that being invited to an event like this was unthinkable, but his involvement in the city’s less-than-savory underbelly was more than just rumor. The Pepper Potts wouldn’t entertain that. Tony Stark sure hadn’t.

“He wasn’t, but I trust my sources just like I trust that fat wallet of his to get him through the door. I need you to be there when he is. I’ve got a hunch you’ll get something good. Besides, you won’t be going it alone.” Jameson eyes you excitedly nibbling your thumb nail, his gaze judging, “Still wanna put up a fight about it?”

Damn him, he knew you too well.

“Who’s coming with me?”

Jameson rolls his eyes, “Parker, of course. Despite all his whining. He won’t be on the floor with you all night but he will be there.”

Your interest, already piqued, intensifies. “Parker? You mean the Spidey Stalker?”

As owner of the Web-Blog, the early days of Spider-Man had largely been photographed through citizens on fuzzy phones or street cameras and the news. It wasn’t until someone new had come onto the scene, getting the best pictures of Spidey to date: a (mostly) anonymous freelancer who Jameson exclusively referred to as Parker. You never saw him, even when you tried to.

He sent his photos by email, rarely came by the office, and those of your coworkers that had caught a glimpse had only ever insisted that you weren’t “missing out on anything”. His credit in every article on the web-slinger was simply “P. B. Parker”.

His photos were fucking amazing, and nobody knew anything else about him.

You feel a tingle of curiosity that hadn’t been there before. It would be all too easy, too convenient, if...

“If I’m right—and I always am—Fisk is gonna make a scene and Spider-Man’s gonna have a hand in the pie. He’ll probably swing in and destroy a few million dollars worth of charitable contributions to the needy before ‘saving the day’. Orchestrating the whole thing for good publicity, no doubt...”

You keep your lips sealed on that matter. You’d fought the good fight plenty of times and always managed to come out the loser, somehow. Instead, you think about Parker. How funny would it be if you became friends with the only other person at the Daily Bugle whose contributions in the Spidey community rivaled yours? Maybe you could get him to release some never before seen shots of Spidey for the blog. Or for yourself. But mainly for the blog.

At the very least, meeting him could put that silly thought out of your mind. Among other things. “Is there a budget for my outfit?”

You hear her before she approaches.

In all your time working at the Daily Bugle, you had never seen a hair on Jillian Reyes’ head out of place. She commanded awe whenever she entered a room, taking Jameson’s verbal beatings and spitting them right back at him. She was a powerhouse of a woman with the charm to make her perfect for the culture beat of NYC.

Even now, as her wife struggled to put their newborn to rest, she had a smile about a mile wide waiting for you at the front door. She’s crushing you in a hug before you even get the chance to say hello, “It’s so good to see you! I feel like I haven’t been to the office in forever,” she shoves you back an inch just to look you in the eyes, “tell me: how’s JJ treating you?”

“Like I’ve just handed him a parking ticket.”

Jillian replies with a pitying smile and lets you in. “You know, when JJ told me you’d be taking the charity ball feature, I had a feeling he muscled you into it.”

“I’m sorry for interrupting your time off,” Jillian leads you to her office, your hands wringing each other for something to do, “I just... I’m not exactly built for this kind of thing.”

“Nonsense! You’ve covered plenty of brouhahas in your time. What’s the difference between covering a robbery and a charity ball?”

“A lot, actually. A lot.”

Jillian immediately sits in the nearest chair, looking winded just from the walk here. You take the seat across from her, minding a burp cloth. “Don’t tell me you’re scared of a few Richie Riches. They’ll only bite if you tell them you’re for the taking. All you’ve gotta do is channel that fearlessness you have when you’re covering the crime beat and you’ll be fine.”

“But, Jill, I’m not you. You’re... exciting, and personable, and funny. You can fit in places like that. I’m gonna stick out like a sore thumb. Not to mention that Jameson wants me to keep tabs on Wilson Fisk while I’m there.”

Jillian suddenly lurches forward, her scent of baby powder circling around you, “Wilson Fisk is gonna be there? Maternity leave be damned. I’ll take the article off your hands.”

“Ah, no you will not,” you press your hands to her shoulders as she makes a move to get up, no doubt intent on berating Jameson to let her back early, “you just had a baby. The last place you need to be is in the same room as Kingpin.”

She sinks back into her seat with a pout that could rival her newborn’s. “So... JJ thinks Fisk’s got something planned?” When you nod, her brows draw together in thought, “And he’s making you go all alone?”

“No. Not alone. With... Parker.”

Jillian doesn’t always wear her emotions on her face. With the types of people she interviews, she has to have something of a poker face, but you can see everything when you say Parker’s name.

Her eyes light up like two jades hit by the sun. She scoops your hands up in hers and you try not to focus on the vague stickiness of them. You didn’t want or need to know what part of the baby played a part in it, “The Spidey Stalker? Do you... do you think Spider-Man is gonna show up?”

You swallow much harder than necessary.

The truth was that you had yet to even mention any of this to him. Part of you hoped that Jameson’s sources were wrong and that come Thursday (if the web-slinger found it in him to grace your fire escape once more), he’d fact check the news and that would be that.

But first, you’d have to talk to him. Talk to Peter.

Your paths had crossed a few times in the line of duty but this was Kingpin, the man behind the attack that had started this whole mess with Spidey. His lackeys had done a number on him, you hated to imagine what Fisk could pull in person.

You feel Jillian squeeze your hands and that brings you back to reality. “Maybe. He’s the only one who could stop him if he plans to do something... the only one around to do something.”

Your co-worker’s face has morphed from wonder into worry. For a moment, the way she’s looking at you is almost maternal, “You should really be careful. I love a good story as much as you but JJ sounds sure this’ll get ugly. I don’t care if Parker wants to stick around for Spider-Man, you hightail it outta there as soon as shit hits the fan, okay?”

You know she’s right to warn you. You’d do the same if it was the other way around. “Yeah, of course, Jill.”

But if shit were to hit the fan... did you really want to be anywhere else?

You tell yourself you’re not avoiding the inevitable. You fuss over tomorrow’s outfit and scrub at your nicest shoes, not because you need something to busy your hands or your mind, but because you’ve got to be ready. You keep your back to the window while you iron, not because you’d probably lose hours just staring out into the dark waiting for him to swing by, but because you... well, you would think of a better excuse later.

Time began to tick away as you consumed yourself in tasks. Sometimes, when your skin prickled in that telltale way, you’d look to the windows, but it was hard to see anything but your reflection and the speckles of city light swallowing the last rays of sunset.

At some point, when your eyes began to imagine his shape on the dark of your fire escape, you forced yourself to the kitchen for tea.

Tea (and hot cocoa and coffee) had become a staple of your evenings together, the method kneaded into your hands until eventually, frustratingly, you found yourself staring at a Hulkitty cup with no idea if you should bother filling it up. He liked cream and honey in his, it’d suck to leave it out for too long.

Just as you’re debating putting it out of your line of sight, the lighting in your apartment dims.

It’s silent, other than the kettle bubbling and the ever-present drone of the city. You look past the kitchen and into the living room where the overhead light’s been shut off and the window left open a crack. All that you can see is all that the lamp light touches.

Then there’s a knock. It’s timid, so quiet you probably wouldn’t have heard it if you were still stuck in your own thoughts. For some reason, you’re glued to your spot.

The shape your brain had been imagining was there again.

When you continue to stand still, the window opens, revealing one leg after the other until he’s standing in your living room. Mask down. You think that the awkwardness is on behalf of your last encounter at first, until... “Don’t go.”

Something is off. Spidey—the hero you met first—had never sounded so severe. Even when the city beat him down, he managed to crack a joke. Put a little humor in his voice. Keep the tone light, make you think that even the things that hurt him couldn’t keep him down for long.

Peter—the hero before you now—didn’t bother. Perhaps he’d unmasked more than just his name that night.

You leave the kitchen, kettle abandoned, tip-toeing around the last time you’d seen each other to get to the heart of his words, “What are you talking about?”

“The ball. Don’t go.” He shifts in place. Something else you’d learned about Spidey was that he couldn’t stay still for long. There’s still a whole room of space between the two of you and you see him rock forward onto the balls of his feet like a runner preparing to take off at the sound of a whistle.

The longer you stand there, confused, the more he fidgets. “How... did you know I was going?”

He stops moving. His hands (that he’d been clenching at his sides) splayed out on his thighs. Whatever he’s thinking, his brain can’t be moving faster than yours right now.

Your first thought would be a betrayal if he knew. There’s a small voice in your head (your reporter voice, the one that makes you push where your common sense tells you not to) that tells you there are camera lenses somewhere, his doing. A fail-safe, perhaps. He had the technological repertoire of one of the world’s greatest minds at his disposal. He could bug an apartment. He had plenty of time to do it, and how else would he know something that only Jameson, Jillian, and Parker should know?

Your second thought hits you like a ton of bricks, more fantastical and breathtaking. There were probably a million Peters in the state of New York alone, but how many-

“Someone told me.”

You blink, “Who?”

“...Parker.”

“Parker. P. B. Parker.”

“Uh-huh.”

“At the Daily Bugle?”

“Yup.”

“The Spidey Stalker?”

He makes something of a choked noise, “He’s not a stalker. I... let him take pictures of me. I give him the exclusive and he makes me look pretty damn good. That’s it.”

A disbelieving breath slips past your lips. You think back to every photo that you’d seen of his, some you’d even lifted and used on the Web-Blog, and how unbelievably... photogenic they were. Staged, some could argue.

“I thought I was your source at the Daily Bugle.”

“You are!”

“Your only source. How long have you and Parker been... working together?”

“Couple months, maybe? Not as long as you and me. I promise.” Peter surges forward, unable to keep himself still any longer. He takes your shoulders in his hands and the warmth from his palms are welcome against the bitter breeze. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was just short of apologizing, “I know it’s a little weird. It feels weird.”

But you think about it, about how weird it should feel, and how it’s really more funny than weird, “All the reporters in the city, and you choose the paper that hates you. You’re more of a masochist than I first thought.”

Peter’s hand loosens, slips down your bicep a hair. “I didn’t choose the Daily Bugle. I chose you.”

You look away. “And Parker?”

He releases you. Bounces back on his toes, starts admiring the cracks in the wall. “What can I say? The guy needs the money. It was like looking in the mirror.”

“Peter,” you whisper, and his head whips to you before you’ve even drawn the breath to say his name, “you know if you... if you need anything...” I will help you, I will always help you, “there’s a whole city out there that wants to help you.”

The eyes of his suit softens.

You’d been tossing his name around in your head ever since he’d told you, wondering how long it’d take you to get used to using it, and yet repeatedly, consistently, it fell from your lips so easily.

It was funny. You’d been so worried about the conversation you’d have to have about all this, and you’d broken the ice without even thinking about it. “I’m sorry about freezing up last time. I just wasn’t expecting that... I mean, it’s not like I think you don’t trust me, it’s just... it’s your name.”

Peter shrugs, “And it’s you.”

Your throat closes up at that. The simplicity of it, the certainty of it. Your breath shudders, “It’s that easy?”

Peter laughs, muffled by the mask, but he might as well have been right beside you, it sounded so clear and light, “I meant what I said. I trust you with it. And I’d like to maybe one day trust you with more. But this whole, uh, superhero thing? It’s dangerous. I know they say that all the time in comic books but I don’t want to lose this. Lose you.” You hope his super-hearing can’t pick up how your heart stutters, clenches in your chest. “So don’t go.”

You swear that you have nothing close to Spidey senses of your own, but even without seeing his face, you can feel the tension rolling off of him in waves, “I have to. If Kingpin is gonna be there, I should be too. And I know what you’re thinking-”

“Oh, you have no idea-”

“-but this is a big deal, Peter. You mentioned before that Kingpin might be planning something big. This... this might be it.”

His voice quirks up an octave, cracking in exasperation, “And you want to be there? Where the big thing is supposed to happen?”

“I mean, don’t you think I oughta?”

“And risk getting hurt in the crossfire? Hell no. No job is worth your life.”

“Peter-” the name gets easier and easier to say the more you say it, “...you and I both know there’s no way in hell I can turn this down. Jameson would have my head.”

“Then let him have it. I’ll web you up a new one. Early Christmas gift.”

A shocked laugh leaves you at that, melting some of the tension in the room. Even Peter’s shoulders sag at the sound. “I really appreciate it... but no deal. I’m going.”

You watch the way Peter’s eyes narrow in thought. You can practically hear the gears whirring and turning behind that mask of his, unable to accept the situation for what it is. You’d only known him for so long, but his stubbornness truly knew no bounds. He had to have the solution to everything. He always had to save the day. “Why can’t you just be a friendly, neighborhood blogger and do your crime-fighting at home?”

Snorting, you roll your eyes, “Did you give Parker this much of a hard time, too?”

In the same moment, the long-forgotten kettle starts singing on the stovetop. Peter glances past you into the kitchen and latches onto the kettle handle with a sharp thwip!, dragging it to another eye until the hissing stops. He then beats you to the kitchen and grabs cups out of the cupboard, your cups (he even searches for the one you happen to favor, moves the other mugs out of the way until he spots it), and starts mixing the tea. You notice he memorized how you like yours.

You watch him, silently for a time, letting him feel his way around the kitchen having seen you do it a million times before. It doesn’t really hit you until this moment that perhaps Peter knows you better than you’d ever realized.

“You should come.” You decide, suddenly.

“Hm?” Peter hums, barely looking up from the fridge as he forages around your top shelf for the milk.

“To the ball. If you’re worried about things going wrong. Maybe you should come.”

Peter finds his treasure and returns to his Hulkitty mug, “What, in a Spidey-themed suit and tie?”

“I mean, maybe not at first... maybe you could come as yourself.”

You get the feeling he’s side-eyeing you even with his head turned to the backsplash. “With what invitation?”

“You’re telling me Spider-Man is afraid of a little breaking and entering?”

“Afraid of Pepper Potts? Absolutely.” He turns and hands you your mug, careful to hold the handle to you so you don’t burn yourself.

“But didn’t you know Iron Man? Didn’t he know you? I’m sure she wouldn’t mind extending an invitation to you, especially if there’s an emergency. And, and! If Kingpin doesn’t show, that means you get to let loose for a night.” You try not to startle too much when he flips up the bottom of his mask to drink.

“I think I’d have a better vantage point from outside anyway.”

“Maybe, but still...” You frown, realizing that Peter’s shoulders start to tense again, “No. You’re right. And you’ll still be there. Maybe me and Parker can sneak you a glass of champagne on the rooftop or something.”

Peter’s lip twitches up into a smile, holding his mug to his lips, “No drinking and swinging, sorry.”

taglist: @yikes-buddy @alexxavicry @theclassicvinyldragon @bi-andready-tocry @thescarletfang

#peter parker x reader #peter parker scenarios #peter parker imagines #peter parker fic #peter parker fluff #peter parker angst #peter parker #tom holland peter parker #spiderman x reader #spiderman scenarios #spiderman imagines #spiderman fic #spiderman fluff #spiderman angst #spiderman #tom holland spiderman #marvel #mjwrites

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fuckyeahpunkflower · 10 months

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Guys guys guys its AU time! With older Miles(18) and older Hobie (20). (Also no spider man powers, normal times)

Miles is attending a prestigious University in Northern New York after years of studying and applying for scholarships at Visions. Rio and Jefferson are super proud of him although a bit sadden that their baby boy is now a young man leaving the house.

On the plus side, Miles is SUPER stoke to finally FINALLY have his very own dorm ALL TO HIMSELF! no more cramped spaces, uncomfortable bunk beds or missing shoes (that somehow always made an appearance again when Ganke returned to the room) Miles admits he will miss Ganke but they'll definitely catch up over some games on the PS4 and summer breaks.

But the best part about this university in Mile's opinion is the fact they allow pets on campus and in dorms. Which means he can live his dream of owning a dog. He's always wanted a dog since he was a kid but his parents never thought he was responsible enough to take care of it ( but mainly because Rio and Jefferson didn't want to deal with a toddler and training a puppy at the same time) Now that Miles is grown he's decided its time to make his own decisions. And that decision was to get a dog the moment he moves into his dorm. It took him 2 weeks to get settled in with his belongings and getting familiar with his classes around campus but after that he was heading towards the nearest pet shelter he could find.

And here we enter Hobie Brown! He works at the local pet shelter which houses all sorts of abandoned and neglected pets. From your typical cats and dogs to reptiles, birds, and even fishes, Hobie is there to take care of them all! And on the weekends he playing with his band mates.

Anyway Cue Miles entering the pet shelter and he's immediately greeted with the site of Hobie. They make brief eye contact and Miles freezes in place lost in thought *Damn, I was not expecting to see someone so fucking cool and hot today oh my gosh get it together you're here for a dog you're here for a dog you're here for a-*

"You know usually people tend to rush straight to the pups and ignore me but with the way your staring at me right now I can't say I'm complaining. your face is the same shade as the pups little red rockets back there" Hobie snickers

"Bro WHAT!?" Miles yelled in utter shock. He was NOT prepared for any amount of what was said to him in that moment. "What- I mean- like man- that was the wildest response I've ever-" He stops rambling to gain his composure back. "Look man, I came in here hoping to adopt a dog, can you help me or what?"

Hobie looks at Miles with amusement in his eyes "Sure thing love, straight to the back we go!"

And that was Hobies and Miles first interaction at the pet shelter.

Back to the p o i n t!!!

This is basically a college Miles and pet shop worker Hobie (except its a shelter) AU merged into one. Basically Miles visits the shelter every week looking for a dog to adopt and Hobie shows him around. With each visit Miles begins to learn more about Hobie and his relationship with the animals at the shelter. Like how Hobie absolutely adores this grey African parrot that was left in the cage on the street. Its feathers are sparse and sheds but it loves to mimic Hobies Cockney accent.

Eventually Miles adopts a cute senior black Labrador named Orca due to the white and gray furs around her eyes. Even after getting his dog he still visits the shelter between classes to talk to Hobie.

So like yeah in order to keep this short before I literally write the first fucking chapter of this AU on here.

Miles is in college and develops feelings for Hobie while he helps him adopt a dog. They hang out sometime later and Eventually BOOM they're boyfriends :D

#punkflower #miles x hobie #i NEED to see more domestic stuff with these two #WHERE ARE THE COFFE SHOP AUs?!#THE TATTO AND PIERCINGS PALOR MEETS FLOURIST AU'S?!#come on yall i belivs in us

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stillflight · 2 years

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I would like to offer this resource for therians, an extensive list of all of Sir David Attenborough’s nature documentaries that are available on soap2day, and a full list of what species* they each (notably, prominently) feature the natural behaviors of, separated by episode, and omitting species that were only shown dead, juvenile or being predated on. This took me a while (I have been working on it since Prehistoric Planet’s release) because I did in fact have to watch every single series in full in order to list all the species and the episodes are around 50 minutes long, but enjoy.

Long post ahead:

Most of these shows have closed captioning, which is why I’ve picked soap2day. Planet Earth is the only one that doesn’t. I did not include Dynasties and Dynasties II because each episode only features one species.

Thank you to Birch (@ambiguousmutt) for his help (he watched about half of the episodes) so I didn’t have to do it individually. Credit goes to him as well.

*Sometimes Attenborough doesn’t say the specific species and I was too busy trying to get through the episodes to identify it. In those cases I just put the most specific name I could.

Planet Earth

Episode one (From Pole to Pole): emperor penguin, polar bear, caribou, arctic grey wolf, Amur leopard, six-plumed bird-of-paradise, superb bird-of-paradise, great white shark, African elephant, African buffalo, lechwe, baboon, African wild dog

Episode two (Mountains): gelada, walia ibex, Ethiopian wolf, guanaco, cougar, grizzly bear, markhor, snow leopard, golden eagle, grey wolf, panda, golden snub-nosed monkey, red panda, demoiselle crane

Episode three (Fresh Water): giant salamander, grizzly bear, smooth-coated otter, Nile crocodile, dolphin fish, midge, Amazon river dolphin, dorado, piranha, spectacled caiman, crab-eating macaque, snow goose

Episode four (Caves): wrinkle-lipped free-tailed bat, cockroach, bat hawk, cave swiftlet, yellow-red rat snake, Texas blind salamander

Episode five (Deserts): Bactrian camel, dromedary camel, red kangaroo, fennec fox, guanaco, long-nosed bat, Nubian ibex, flat lizard, lion, African elephant, locust

Episode six (Ice Worlds): snow petrel, Antarctic petrel, south polar skua, humpback whale, emperor penguin, eider, muskox, arctic grey wolf, polar bear, little auk, arctic fox

Episode seven (Great Plains): Mongolian gazelle, red-billed quelea, wildebeest, snow goose, arctic fox, arctic grey wolf, bison, wild ass, Tibetan fox, pygmy hog, African elephant, lion, baboon

Episode eight (Jungles): magnificent bird-of-paradise, spider monkey, howler monkey, siamang gibbon, gliding tree frog, colugo, red crab spider, African elephant, chimpanzee

Episode nine (The Shallow Seas): humpback whale, multiple corals, banded sea krait, trevally, dugong, bottlenose dolphin, Socotra cormorant, salp, comb jelly, sea lion, dusky dolphin, sea urchin, sunflower starfish, short-tailed stingray, great white shark, king penguin, fur seal

Episode ten (Seasonal Forests): Eurasian lynx, moose, crossbill, wolverine, western capercaillie, pine marten, great grey owl, pudu, kodkod, mandarin duck, cicada, red deer, Amur leopard, tiger, mouse lemur

Episode eleven (Ocean Deep): whale shark, oceanic whitetip shark, common dolphin, Cory's shearwater, manta ray, sea spider, vampire squid, spider crab, unnamed deep sea eel, giant isopod, chambered nautilus, Pacific spotted dolphin, mola mola, frigatebird, sailfish, blue whale

Planet Earth II

Episode one (Islands): pygmy three-toed sloth, Komodo dragon, sifaka, marine iguana, Galapagos racer, Buller's albatross, fairy tern, Christmas Island red crab, yellow crazy ant, chinstrap penguin

Episode two (Mountains): Nubian ibex, red fox, golden eagle, grizzly bear, bobcat, flamingo, mountain viscacha rat, snow leopard

Episode three (Jungles): spider monkey, flying lizard, sword-billed hummingbird, river dolphin, jaguar, glass frog, paper wasp, click beetle, red bird of paradise, Wilson's bird of paradise, indri

Episode four (Deserts): lion, Harris's hawk, shrike, locust, sand grouse, pale chanting goshawk, feral mustang, golden mole, desert long-eared bat, darkling beetle, Namaqua chameleon

Episode five (Grasslands): saiga antelope, lion, harvest mouse, carmine bee-eater, Kori bustard, African elephant, serval, Jackson's widowbird, grasscutter ant, compass termite, giant anteater, bison, red fox, arctic grey wolf

Episode six (Cities): langur, peregrine falcon, leopard, European starling, great bowerbird, raccoon, rhesus macaque, spotted hyena, wels catfish

Our Planet

Episode one (One Planet): lesser flamingo, orchid bee, golden-collared manakin, red-capped manakin, blue manakin, cormorant, booby, common dolphin, shearwater, African wild dog, timber wolf

Episode two (Frozen Worlds): gentoo penguin, wandering albatross, narwhal, Pacific walrus, humpback whale, orca, leopard seal, polar bear

Episode three (Jungles): lowland gorilla, forest elephant, black sicklebill, twelve-wired bird-of-paradise, western parotia, mountain treeshrew, Philippine eagle, black spider monkey, leafcutter ant, Sumatra orangutan, velvet worm

Episode four (Coastal Seas): northern fur seal, compass jellyfish, giant trevally, mobula ray, Atlantic stingray, bottlenose dolphin, grey reef shark, whitetip reef shark, sea otter, California sheephead wrasse, Steller's sea lion, bald eagle, humpback whale, Guanay cormorant, Inca tern, Peruvian booby, South American sea lion

Episode five (From Deserts to Grasslands): Socotran cormorant, Arabian leopard, Arabian oryx, African elephant, cheetah, bison, Alcon blue butterfly, saiga, Przewalski's wild horse, tiger

Episode six (The High Seas): blue whale, spinner dolphin, mobula ray, oarfish, anglerfish, bristle worm, giant petrel, black-browed albatross, wandering albatross, bluefin tuna, sea lion, humpback whale

Episode seven (Fresh Water): Australian pelican, torrent duck, grizzly bear, manatee, giant mayfly, common kingfisher, osprey, jaguar, callipterus cichlid, Siamese fighting fish, hippopotamus, lion, African elephant, sandhill crane

Episode eight (Forests): Siberian tiger, bald eagle, rough-skinned newt, great hornbill, African elephant, African wild dog, fossa, gray mouse lemur

A Perfect Planet

Episode one (Volcano): lesser flamingo, marabou stork, Galápagos land iguana, vampire ground finch, Aldabra giant tortoise, North American river otter, coyote, Kamchatka brown bear, wildebeest

Episode two (The Sun): yellow-cheeked gibbon, fig wasp, arctic grey wolf, wood frog, garter snake, arctic fox, Saharan silver ant, golden snub-nosed monkey, sooty shearwater, humpback whales

Episode three (Weather): straw-colored fruit bat, fire ant, Amazonian giant river turtle, desert rain frog, Bactrian camel, Christmas Island red crab, carmine bee-eater, Nile crocodile, African fish eagle, hippopotamus

Episode four (Oceans): common dolphin, marine iguana, flightless cormorant, flamboyant cuttlefish, eider, bottlenose dolphin, lemon shark, manta ray, blacktip reef shark, trevally, rockhopper pengin, Eden's whale

Episode five (Humans): none

Life

Episode one (Challenges of Life): bottlenose dolphins, cheetah, panther chameleon, orca, brown-tufted capuchin, stalk-eyed fly, hippopotamus, Clark's grebe, giant Pacific octopus, strawberry poison-dart frog, leopard seal, orangutan

Episode two (Reptiles and Amphibians): pebble toad, caiman, basilisk, Brazilian pygmy gecko, panther chameleon, Namaqua chameleon, red-sided garter snake, collared iguana, hog-nosed snake, horned lizard, sea krait, African bullfrog, Komodo dragon

Episode three (Mammals): Weddell seal, elephant shrew, aye-aye, caribou, straw-colored fruit bat, lion, spotted hyena, polar bear, brown-nosed coati, meerkat, African elephant, humpback whale

Episode four (Fish): sailfish, flying fish, weedy sea dragon, convict fish, sarcastic fringehead, mudskipper, Hawaiian freshwater goby, hippopotamus, barbel, silvertip shark, clownfish, sea lion, ragged tooth shark, multiple snapper, whale shark

Episode five (Birds): spatuletail hummingbird, lammergeier, red-billed tropicbird, magnificent frigatebird, red knot, horseshoe crab, lesser flamingo, chinstrap penguin, great white pelican, Clark’s grebe, sage grouse, Vogelkop bowerbird

Episode six (Insects): Darwin’s beetle, unnamed damselfly, monarch butterfly, alkali fly, Wilson’s phalarope, oogpister beetle, mongoose, bombardier beetle, honey bee, black bear, Japanese red bug, Dawson’s bee, grass cutter ant

Episode seven (Hunters and Hunted): ibex, short-tailed stoat, brown bear, Ethiopian wolf, California ground squirrel, star-nosed mole, cheetah, red fox, greater bulldog bat, bottlenose dolphin, Bengal tiger, rattlesnake, orca

Episode eight (Creatures of the Deep): Pompeii worm, Humboldt squid, nemertean worm, moon jelly, fried egg jellyfish, spider crab, stingray, cuttlefish, giant Pacific octopus, sunflower sea star, king crab, cleaner shrimp

Episode nine (Plants): monarch butterfly, purple-throated carib hummingbird

Episode ten (Primates): Hamadryas baboon, Japanese macaque, lowland gorilla, spectral tarsier, phayre's leaf monkey, ring-tailed lemur, Sumatra orangutan, chacma baboon, white-faced capuchin, brown-tufted capuchin, western chimpanzee

Blue Planet II

Episode one (One Ocean): bottlenose dolphin, tuskfish, tern, giant trevally, mobula ray, false killer whale, Asian sheepshead wrasse, orca, humpback whale, walrus

Episode two (The Deep): sea toad, Venus’ flower basket, unnamed shrimp, ethereal snailfish, cock-eyed squid, pyrosome, barrel-eyed fish, unnamed siphonophore, yeti crab, Humboldt squid, fangtooth fish, sixgill shark, scabbardfish, zombie worm

Episode three (Coral Reefs): broadclub cuttlefish, coral grouper, day octopus, multiple corals, green turtle, bottlenose dolphin, manta ray, bobbit worm, saddleback clownfish, marbled grouper, grey reef shark

Episode four (Big Blue): spinner dolphin, yellowfin tuna, mobula ray, sailfish, sperm whale, sea turtle, blue shark, great white shark, multiple jellyfish, Portuguese man o' war, whale shark, wandering albatross, shortfin pilot whale

Episode five (Green Seas): Garibaldi, Australian giant cuttlefish, weedy seadragon, common octopus, pyjama shark, sea otter, tiger shark, smooth stingray, zebra mantis shrimp, common dolphin, humpback whale

Episode six (Coasts): Pacific leaping blenny, king penguin, southern elephant seal, Sally Lightfoot crab, Galápagos sea lion, ochre starfish, clingfish, chain moray eel, Atlantic puffin, arctic skua

Episode seven (Our Blue Planet): none

Prehistoric Planet

Episode one (Coasts): Tyrannosaurus rex, Tethydraco, Phosphatodraco, Tuarangisaurus, Mosasaurus hoffmannii, pycnodont fish, ammonites, Kaikaifilu

Episode two (Deserts): Dreadnoughtus, Tarbosaurus, Velociraptor, Mononykus, Barbaridactylus, Secernosaurus

Episode three (Freshwater): Velociraptor, Tyrannosaurus rex, Deinocheirus, Quetzalcoatlus, Masiakasaurus, Beelzebufo, elasmosaur

Episode four (Ice Worlds): dromaeosaur, hadrosaur, Ornithomimus, Olorotitan, troodontid, Antarctopelta, Pachyrhinosaurus, Nanuqsaurus

Episode five (Forests): Austroposeidon, Triceratops, Carnotaurus, Qianzhousaurus, Edmontosaurus, Atrociraptor, Anodontosaurus, Therizinosaurus, Telmatosaurus, Hatzegopteryx

The Hunt

Episode one (The Hardest Challenge): African leopard, African wild dog, Parson’s chameleon, nose-horned chameleon, African mantis, Darwin’s bark spider, Nile crocodile, Amur falcon, orca, cheetah

Episode two (Arctic): polar bear, arctic grey wolf, arctic fox, glaucous gull

Episode three (Forests): tiger, American marten, sparrow hawk, Portia spider, tarsier, harpy eagle, chimpanzee, army ant

Episode four (Oceans): blue whale, frigatebird, dorado, sargassum fish, spinner dolphin, Beroe ovata, Chiroteuthis, lionfish, black-browed albatross, sea lion, tuna, copper shark, common dolphin, Bryde's whale

Episode five (Plains): cheetah, caracal, honey badger, termite, bald eagle, lion, Ethiopian wolf, hotrod ant, spoor spider

Episode six (Coasts): bottlenose dolphin, algae octopus, sand bubbler crab, long-tailed macaque, marine otter, grizzly bear, grey wolf, peregrine falcon, orca, humpback whale

Episode seven (Conservation): none

Life In Colour

Episode one (Seeing In Color): Indian peafowl, mandrill, Costa’s hummingbird, magnificent bird-of-paradise, blue moon butterfly, fiddler crab, mantis shrimp, flamingo, poison dart frog

Episode two (Hiding In Color): Bengal tiger, langur, ptarmigan, crab spider, zebra, Cuban painted snail, blue-striped fangblenny, common waxbill, pin-tailed wydah, Augrabies flat lizard

Frozen Planet II

Episode one (Frozen Worlds): emperor penguin, orca, Pallas’s cat, Siberian tiger, grizzly bear, hooded seal, polar bear

Episode two (Frozen Ocean): polar bear, beluga, harp seal, skeleton shrimp, crested auklet, orca

Episode three (Frozen Peaks): high-casqued chameleon, japanese macaque, kea, andean flamingo, giant panda, golden eagle, andean mountain lion

Episode four (Frozen South): king penguin, Antipodean wandering albatross, blue whale, Weddell seal, chinstrap penguin, snow petrel, leopard seal, orca

Episode five (Frozen Lands): grey wolf, arctic fox, Amur leopard, Siberian tiger, painted turtl, Lapland bumblebee, snowy owl, caribou, grizzly bear

Episode six (Our Frozen Planet): none

Africa

Episode one (Kalahari): fork-tailed drongo, ostrich, black rhinoceros, Angolan giraffe, African leopard, armored ground cricket, spider wasp

Episode two (Savannah): Agama lizard, shoebill, bee-eaters and rollers, lesser flamingo, African elephant, crowned eagle, African fish eagle, martial eagle

Episode three (Congo): chimpanzee, central African rock python, Angola banana frog, African skimmer, rockfowl, African elephant

Episode four (Cape): emperor swallowtail, giant kingfish, African penguin, monkey beetle, springbok, yellow-billed kite, pied crow, ghost crab, vundu catfish, Nile crocodile, Bryde’s whale, great white shark, common dolphin

Episode five (Sahara): Grevy’s zebra, naked mole rat, barn swallow, Dromedary camel, dung beetle, crocodile, western yellow wagtail, Saharan silver ant

Episode six (The Future): none

#alterhuman #therian #resources

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silent-raven13 · 8 months

Text

When Hobie gets drunk

The Spider Band decided to go to one of Hobie's kickback parties. Well, it's one of his bandmate's kick back party, there's alcohol, weed, and other crazy stuff for the teenagers to have a good time. For once, the Spider Band had their day off taking the opportunity to be teenagers. The group put on their best punk outfit to fit into Hobie's world, just so they avoid looks.

Gwen grins widely having to wear plaided cargo pants with many zippers, an oversize shirt with a vest, and thick combat boots: Man, this is gonna be fucking exciting! -she shakes Pav with excitement. Finally, she gets to enjoy partying with her friends after weeks of being Spider-heroes-

Pav being dizzy from Gwen shaking him: Ahahaha, ye-yeah! I really want to do fun beer games! -He wore a much simpler outfit; a black tank top with ripped slashes around and skinny blue jeans with chains. The outfit works with rock boots.-

Margo smirks at Gwen: Hahaha, you're excited to get shitfaced, huh? -wearing a more Androgynous outfit; a long half skirt that is over black buckles black skinny ripped jeans, her tube top with fishnets and a thick belt slanted to the side of her wide hips. Her hair in thick locs with neon colors to stay true to her Spider Byte colors.-

Gwen blushes at Margo's smirk: Huh, ye-yeah! Come on, we finally got to enjoy ourselves. -the two noticed short knotted locs with red dye under their noses-

Spider Zeros: Yo! -she holds her Spiderling as she wore more a Gothic Punk style; a huge over size t-shirt with rip hems and certain parts with an asymmetrical collar stitched fish necks, one long fishnet glove from her arm to her hands, and a black fingerless glove on the other. She had thick big black buckled platform boots, with uneven stockings of black and red. Her makeup dark and dramatic with purple lipstick- What's good!

Pav: I keep forgetting how short you are!

Spider Zero: Excuse you! I am older than all of ya! -she huffs- Anyway, i heard there's free alcohol and join in! Where's Peni?

Gwen sighs: She's busy.

Spider Zero arched her eyebrows: Wow, so boring.

Margo: Hey, she's always working on her machines.

Miles spotted them: Hey guys! -Everyone stares at his outfit being surprised. Miles blushed being shy, his arm rub his other arm- Is is too much?

They squealed: Your so cute, Miles!

Gwen: OMG are you wearing a skirt!

Pav: Look at the lipstick!

Margo: Damn, Miles! I didn't know you like to dress up like that! -she giggles-

Spider Zero awed: Awe, you got to show off your tattoo!

Miles' cheeks felt super warm: Really? Thanks! I wanted to impress Hobie, since he's hardcore and... I'm just simple! -He went all out on his outfit: a red plaided half skirt with a cut to show the black one pants/short and tartan around his reavealing left thigh. His right leg being covered by the ripped one pant. He had on a shredded Hobie's band crop top and underneath the top is one layer of fishnets covering his his right arm to his tummy. The left arm with ripped up plaided sleeve purpose to cover only the forearm and hand. His revealing stomach had a heart shape buckle belt with studs and chains as decor. Then he had a black leather jacket from Hobie with patches and paint on it with words and slang around it. The same goes with his messily painted sunflowers on the sides on his Devil Games Mismatched combat boots. His face being covered with black lipsticks, and smokey red and black eyeshadow with white wing eyeliner. Put on a fake lip piercing, but had his earrings on.-

Gwen: Trust me, Hobie is gonna be so happy!

Hobie: OI! OI! Peter Pan! -the group heard their friend calling out for him. They turned their head toward the voice is coming from through the thick crowd of the underground warehouse party. They saw him walking so sloppy, so drunk!-

Miles gasps with a cute pout: Hobie, you got drunk before we got here!

Hobie finally noticed his boyfriend as he got closer. His vision was blurry as he pushed people out of his way, until his vision came clear when he saw his beaming Angel, his Sunflower: Miles? -he kinda slur his words-

Spider Zeros: A DOY! No shit Sherlock! -she rolled her eyes-

Hobie scowls: Eh, are you being a Xenophobic -his eyes at Zero-

Zero: No, it's an expression for no shit! -she grins- Anyway, I wanna get shitfaced! Right, Spiderling! -her spider happily nodded- Come on, let's drink!

Hobie look at his friends: Ya'll look freaking amazing -he turns to Miles- You look amazing, luv! -he holds his partner's cheek having to stare deep into his eyes like he was the only man in the party-

Miles smiles shyly feeling his cheeks warm again: Heh, thanks, bae.

Pav: Yeah, we should start partying! I finally got the chance to get wasted!

Hobie drunkily slouch on his Miles: The alcohol is that way -he use his thumb to point the area where all the alcohol is at- Come!

It wasn't long till the party went hard! Gwen challenging Hobie into shots. Margo cheering on Gwen while Pav cheer for Hobie. Zero drinks her beer watching with Miles. The young man had a red cup filled with alcohol, he took small sip. If he's honest, he hates alcohol. The taste is too bitter to him, he hates beer the most: Luv! Luv! Were you watching? -Hobie called for him-

Miles laughs: I am, bae! Wow, ten shots! That's crazy.

Hobie grins widely until Pav shouted: Holy Shit, Gwen! -She chugged a bottle of Vodka-

Margo cheers: Hahaha, I never knew you can hold your liquor, Gwen!

Gwen grins wildly being sluggish and slur her words: Ye-yeahh, I ams am'zing...

Miles laughs: Shit, she's gonna feel that in the morning.

Zero: Nah, she got white girl wasted, she can handle it!

Pav giggles having to get another round of shots ready: Miles! Come, join us!

Miles: Ohh, I dunno... I'm not that good with liquor!

Zero: Come on, man. Let's take a shot! -she nudges as her Spiderling slurps her cup with a straw as he rest on her shoulder-

Miles: Is he allowed to drink that?

Zero: Yeah, stop changing the subject.

Miles gave in: Alright. Hobie wanna take a hot with me.

Hobie already too drunk: YEAH! -being much hyper, more louder than his cool self- Let's do this! -The group got their shots to cheer and drink. Miles shudders at the vodka burning down his throat-

Miles: Ugh!

Hobie kisses his forehead being more clingy: It's alright, Brooklyn! You were great.

Gwen drunkly said: Ugh, ya two are always so lovey lovey! Makes me upset I got no one! -she slouches on Margo-

Margo: Whoa easy. Maybe you should take a little break.

Gwen pouts: Nuuhhh!

Margo: Yeeesss

Zero snorted: Oh brother...

Pav: Hehehe, will Ghostbyte happen?

Zero: A what?

Pav: Gwen is Ghost-spider and Margo is Spiderbyte. Ghostbyte.

Hobie chuckles still being drunk with his words: Wat's he talking' bout, darling? -he sat with Miles having his arms around his lover's shoulder-

Miles: Ship names! Pav, I let you watch one anime and now you're shipping everyone, man! -he chuckles-

Pav: Oh pfft, your just mad because I got to name Miguel and Peter, Spiderdads!

Zero: I like SpiderDaddies more.

Gwen hugs Margo being clingy: Ghostbyte!!! -Margo just laughs as she held Gwen to help her not fall-

Miles: And you couldn't find a name for you?

Pav snorted: Pfft me and Gayatri is easy! Pavitri! See! -he looks at Hobie and Miles- Hmm, I'll come up one for you two. It's hard since you got no specific Spiderman name.

Miles gasp: What? I have cool powers!

Zero: Hobie is easy. He's Punk Spiderman.

Hobie grunts: I don't call myself a punk, that's labeling me a-

Zero cut him off: Yeah, we get it. It's just that's how it is.

Pav: Hmmm, Hobie calls Miles, Sunflower- OH! PUNKFLOWER!

Margo listens: That's cute.

Zero nodded: Or Flowerpunk!

Gwen: I like -she burps as talks- that one! -still slouching on Margo-

Miles laughs: Okay, it's cute. Not gonna lie.

Hobie grunts: Who cares about labels, luv? It's not really us! You're my Sunflower! -he snuggle his partner- why should we care what others think of us?

Miles: I like it. -he chuckles- We got our secret ship names, bae.

Zero: Unless you're in Earth 1218, they already know your ships.

Pav: Oh, isn't that world where reality is soo real! Like their laws of nature is so powerful that their super-heroes don't exist- only through imagination! -He gasps with awe look on his face, and hands on his head-

Zero: Yeah! How did you know?

Hobie: This guy knows everything! He's always hearing the latest gossip at HQ!

Margo: And you can't tell him NOTHING! He's the first one to spread it!

Pav fake gasp: ME? How dare you!

Margo: It's true. You always instigating and being the first one to spread the word. Last time, I mention about Ben being in the pain in the ass and he quickly told everyone. Like, bro! -she laughs at Pam's expression-

Pav: To be fair, you also said to other Spiderpeople! -He laughs- Not my fault, Miguel got involved!

Zero: Man, that man is always up in everyone asses tho! He one time got mad because I didn't signed in or out.

Margo: But you go through multiverses?

Zero: I know!

Hobie: He's a control arse!

Gwen: Yeah, fuck Miguel! -being too drunk to care what she said-

Margo: Opp! I wouldn't say that.

Miles: Yeah, he's not all bad. He's like an old building that needs a clean up!

Pav: I see, FlowerFang happening! -Getting a dark glare from Hobie. Huh oh, jealous Hobie is back-

Zero: Ohhh, nice one!

Miles pouts: Nah, Pav. Now, you're being an instigator! I just think Miguel got some rough patches.

Margo: Before we continue this convo! Miles, I'm curious -she and Gwen sat down on chairs behind them. Gwen still cuddling against Margo- Like no offense, but- but would you?

Miles: Huh?

Pav laughs: And I'm the instigator, huh?

Margo: Oh hush!

Zero laughs: Now, we're getting to the juicy detail!

Hobie glares at them: Aye, are ya gonna disrespect me like this? In front of my face!

Margo hold her hands in defense: I'm just saying. Okay, let me be more honest. Would ya'll tap Miguel?

Everyone went silent except for Hobie with a scowl: No.

Margo grins: Why?

Hobie: Because he's a bloody bloke! A fucking pig within this whole society controlling all of us! What do you mean? Would you all do him! -his eyes widen in shock-

Zero: No! I'm Asexual and- that man got issues.

Margo: Paving is thinking pretty hard there, huh? Hey, you okay, bud?

Pav: What da fuck? I can't even think without you calling me out! -Zero laughs out loud-

Margo: It's like you're really thinking about it. Look, I'ma be honest. Miguel is a fine man... -she explains- We are not gonna sit here and lie about that, and he got some sweet cake. I mean, have you look at that man? -The group except for Hobie nodded with agreement. Hobie looks at Miles' who gave a slight nod-

Hobie: LUV!

Miles: What? I'm just agreeing that Miguel is handsome!

Pav: Look, I think I would if I wasn't in a serious relationship! -he spotted Zero about to say something to him- Considering- Considering we are all adults, so it should be fine! -he sips his drink-

Zero: So you would since your 18, now.

Pav: Ya! I mean, why not?

Margo: Lowkey, same. High key, only for a night stand, like have you seen that man's ass. Lord!

Zero: It's like two bouncing balls!

Pav: Gwen is all knocked out.

Gwen snoring in Margo's shoulders: Let her sleep. Anyway, Miles? Your opinion.

Miles: I'm in a relationship! I can't say that.

Hobie smirks: Yeah, he shouldn't think about it. -he slouch on his boyfriend-

Margo: Hypothetically speaking-

Hobie getting jealous: nah, fuck your hypo!

Zero and Pav laughs: He's mad mad, now!

Miles: Me and Hobie are in a great relationship! Why would I wanna think about another man?

Zero: Sheesh, loyal man.

Margo: But like imagine tho.

Hobie: Margo, your being a Pav!

Pav: Me! No, what da hell did I do?

Margo laughs: Relax, Hobs!

Hobie scowls having to go to his Miles: You know, I love you, right!

Miles blink surprised: Huh? Hobie, where-

Hobie got in front of his partner with his hands cupping his lover: I told you before I love you! I love you, mate! -his drunk self getting emotional-

Miles: I love you, too-

Zero: Wow, and three years strong!

Hobie being clingy to Miles: I love you, Sunflower! You know, that! I would fucking become a villain if you leave me or if anything happen to you! I'll fucking kill anyone who hurts you! I would be nothing without you, Miles! -kissing him on the lips and cheek-

Miles: Hobie, Hobie! Baby, you're drunk. Calm down!

Hobie: I love you, you're my baby! -he holds Miles in his arms- This is man is mine!

Miles never knew how clingy his boyfriend could get, even how easily tick off: Baby, I love you, too! -he hugs him back-

Hobie: I love you, MILES! You're my SUNFLOWER! -His arms wrapped around his Miles as they cuddle on the couch. Everyone laughs while Miles tries to calm his boyfriend down-

#punkflower #miles morales #hobie brown #spiderman #spider verse #across the spider verse

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happy--birthday--kiddo · 10 months

Text

Silly Lil ATSV Headcannons

Miles Morales:

Always burns his tongue on foods even when people warn him it's hot

Hops on one foot when putting socks on

Had eczema as a lil kid

Used to absolutely love those marker dot stamps and made a ton of pictures with them (Rio has them all ofc).

Never liked classical music until he saw Gwen perform Swan Lake (but if you accuse him of liking it he'll adamantly deny it)

Snorts when he laughs

Dreams in colors and shapes rather than images

Secretly spends forever in front of the mirror doing impressions of the other spiders when he's supposed to be getting ready

On Mothers' Day he always wakes up at the crack of dawn to cook Rio a meal 🫶 He's a pretty good cook and likes to experiment with her recipes to make her something special

Always has a million bruises at any given time cuz he's so clumsy

Wears contacts

Can root out snacks from a mile away. If you have a bag of chips in your bag, it'll be found and gone in 5 minutes. (HE'S A GROWING BOI OKAY)

Had like 10 fish as a kid because they kept dying and his parents felt bad so they kept replacing them (also they were probably named Bubbles)

Was definitely a gullible kid and when someone at school told him "gosh" was a bad word he solemnly believed it

Gwen Stacy:

Vegetarian

The first time she dyed her hair she had her dad do it and she ended up with really uneven coloring. Her dad felt so bad but she thought it was hilarious.

Fidgets with her tongue on her tooth gap when she's swinging

Always wanted a dog but she's allergic

Has an extremely low spice tolerance but loves it anyway

Prefers cold over hot (probably why her suit is white to reflect heat)

She was lonely as an only child and had a lot of imaginary friends until she met Peter

Loves scary movies and forces Miles to watch them with her

Blushes red when she laughs (not bashfully, she's just really pale)

Terrified of deep water

Hums when she showers

Joined the band as a joke but realized she had a talent and enjoyed it

Loves to scare Miles by waiting for him on his ceiling or on the inside of doors (bonus points if she'd just forced him to watch a scary movie)

Actually cackles when she bullies Miles

Drinks a ton of water for like, no reason

Miguel O'Hara:

Needs reading glasses but stopped using them in public after Peter B. made fun of him for it. Now he just squints and uses them when he's alone (or alone with Lyla: she knows he's sensitive about it so she doesn't comment for once)

Has insomnia due to nightmares so he's always tired

Drinks a lot of coffee but doesn't eat much

He's ticklish like it's NOBODY'S business, especially around the hip area and ears

He excelled at math in school because numbers always made more sense to him than people

Stubs his toe unnaturally often and one time he got so pissed that he threw the offending table into the wall (Lyla filmed the whole thing and showed Peter B)

His back gets really itchy but he can't reach it so he either suffers an existential crisis or scratches his back on his wall like a bear

Used to have an intense phobia of needles

Has special gloves he sleeps in to help protect his sheets from being torn up by his claws (they come out with the nightmares)

Compulsively exercises when he can't sleep

You're welcome 💥 Also I have a shit ton more where that came from so lmk if anyone wants more <3

#atsv #atsv headcanons #headcanons #miles morales #gwen stacy #atsv miguel #miguel o'hara #across the spiderverse #lex says wise things

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dansnaturepictures · 3 months

Text

Fishlake Meadows, Romsey: A special place

This nature reserve is equally as uplifting to visit in the spring and summer months when exotic Hobbies dash through the sky and colossal Stag Beetles roam the canal side path as it is in winter when Gadwall, Pintail, Pochard and Teal immerse me in a world of waterfowl.

A magnificent raptor is a star attraction to this reserve in spring and summer, Ospreys (particularly one) standing like grand statues and offering breathtaking moments of natural wonder when they fish. Many raptors adorn the skies here, Marsh Harrier in its prime habitat, ravishing Red Kite, Buzzard and Kestrel. Sparrowhawk also a key species in this oasis of wild in an urban area and a non-bird of prey evolutionary lookalike is a mesmerising sight and sound here on spring days, the Cuckoo. Its similarly in appearance to the predatory Sparrowhawk able to fool the adults of its host species into leaving their nest so it can insert its imposter egg. Other key waterbirds to see here include bight Egyptian Geese and Greylags, Great Crested Grebe, Common Gull, Snipe and dazzling Water Rail always a species to cherish seeing. Another of the main stars of this reserve is an elegant giant which is gripping the south of the country now, Great White Egret. Purple Heron and Glossy Ibis are two rarities I was lucky to see here. I was ecstatic to see a Kingfisher catch a fish along the canal when reaching the reserve as was I when I was so fortunate to see a splendid Cetti’s Warbler after being surrounded by their bright and cherry calls evocative of a reedbed paradise. Sedge and Garden Warbler other amazing warblers I’ve seen here. Other passerines it’s a treat to see here include Wren, Bullfinch, Blackcap, Treecreeper, captivating Nuthatch, vibrant Stonechat and Reed Bunting. A Roe Deer a delight to see.

It's an insect haven too with Hairy Dragonfly one of the first spring dragonflies to see and the gem of Banded Demoiselle another key species with Migrant Hawker enjoyed here too. Speckled Wood and Green-veined White fly the flag for beautiful butterflies and Brimstone moth and Grey Birch are among sensational moths I’ve seen here. Drinker moth caterpillar and vigorous ruby Cardinal beetle are other key insects I’ve seen here. Nursery web spider was another of nature’s fascinating little stars which has thrilled me here. Onto plants and there is an array of colour here throughout the seasons created by stunning species such as wood avens, comfrey, meadowsweet, cuckooflower, forget-me-not, hemp agrimony, bird vetch, yellow iris, water lily, hogweed, traveller’s joy and marsh marigold. A sight of intricate and alluring turkey tail fungi clinging to a stump beside the canal at one time lit up by the glorious winter sun was wonderful.

This brilliant nature reserve with its distinctive dead trees and thriving reedbed, wetland, canal and woodland habitat is a star of a reserve that has risen over the past few years and an exciting vision of how to use land for nature and let a landscape be transformed. A lesson of hope, a place I always come back from inspired.

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weirdanimal-tournament · 1 year

Text

THE COMPETITORS

After hours of filtering, I have a list! From 411 submisstions to 134 competitors. Of course, that means that not all the submissions are competing. My main rule for filtering was that when many similar animals were submitted, one was selected. This means that even if your submission din't get in, there is likely somthing else similar you can vote for instead! I'm hoping to get the polls out this Saturday or Sunday, and I'll post the time once it's decided. That being said... here's the list!

Mouse deer

Blanket octopus

Twenty plume moth

Anomalocaris

Caecilian

Bagworm moth caterpillars

Balaenognathus

Banded archerfish

Barnacle

Barreleye fish

Tripod fish

Bigfin squid

Bilby

Black sea hare

Black snub nosed monkey

Blobfish

Blue sea dragon

Nano-chameleon

Bush brown caterpillar

Chinese water deer

Maned wolf

Colugo

Common spotted cuscus

Corpse Assassin Bug

Messmate pipefish

Cotylorhynchus

creatonotos gangis

Tongue eating louse

Ganges river dolphin

ghost pipefish

Giant Anteater

Giant gippsland earthworm

Giant tube worm

Giraffe Weevil

Glowworms

Goblin shark

Golden mole

Green-banded broodsac

Greenland shark

Gum leaf skeletonizer caterpillars

Hagfish

Hallucigenia

Hammer head bat

Helicoprion

Honduran white bat

Short horned lizard

Green hydra

Jerboa

Jerusalem cricket

Lamprey

Largetooth sawfish

Bulwer’s pheasant

Lowland Streaked Tenrec

Lyrebird

Marbled polecat

Mata mata

Mexican mole lizard

Ghost faced bat

Mudskipper

Muntjac

Naked bulldog bat

Naked mole rat

Phillipene tube nosed fruit bat

Oarfish

Mantis shrimp

Ogre faced spider

Okapi

platypus

Pangolin

Parrot fish

Partridge bug

Pelican eel

Asian giant softshell turtle

Pink fairy armadillo

Pipa pipa

Platybelodon

Portuguese Man O War

Potoos

Predatory tunicate

Pufferfish

Sea spider

Red lipped batfish

Bowmouth guitarfish

Roseate spoonbill

Pink iguana

Royal albatross

Sage grouse

Saiga antelope

Sailfin dragon

Volcano snail

Schaefer’s anglerfish

Sea cucumber

Sea pig

Sea sheep

Sharovipteryx

Echidna

Assassin spider

Spider tailed viper

Siphonophore

Solenodon

Spectral bat

Spix’s disc winged bat

Spotted wobbegong

Stalk-eyed fly

Stoplight loosejaw

Giant phantom jelly

Sunfish

Sword billed hummingbird

Tailless whip scorpion

Tapir

Tardigrade

Tarsier

Telescopefish

Woodcock

Aye-aye

Bobbit worm

Nautilus

Glass frog

Immortal jellyfish

Olm

Mirror spider

Trilobite Beetle

Trumpetfish

Vampire bat

Vampire squid

Velvetworm

Wonderfish

Wrinkle-faced bat

#animals #animal #weird animals #weird animal #tournament #competition #poll #polls #zoology

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o-craven-canto · 6 months

Text

All animal species (and a couple algae) that have kept the same scientific name since Linnaeus

The first work of taxonomy that is considered as having any scientific authority for animal species was the 10th edition of Linnaeus' Systema Naturae, published in 1758. (Also a book on spiders called Aranei Suecici, published one year before.) That's the foundational text of the binominal system of nomenclature of species still in use today. Since then most of Linnaeus' original species (4379 species, of which 185 mammals, 554 birds, 217 "amphibians" (including reptiles and cartilaginous fish), 379 fishes, 2104 "insects" (including various arthropods, of which 664 are beetles and 543 are moths & butterflies crammed into only 3 genera), and 940 "worms" (including basically all other invertebrates, and even some protists and algae)) have been dismembered, renamed, or at least moved to different genera (e.g. the house sparrow went from Fringilla domestica to Passer domesticus).

Here is a list of all of Linnaeus' original species from 1758 that still retain their original name. I believe they are 484 in total.

"Mammalia"

(Primates)

Homo sapiens (human)

Lemur catta (ring-tailed lemur)

Vespertilio murinus (rearmouse bat)

(Bruta)

Elephas maximus (Asian elephant)

Trichechus manatus (West Indian manatee)

Bradypus tridactylus (three-toed sloth)

Myrmecophaga tridactyla (giant anteater)

Manis pentadactylus (Chinese pangolin)

(Ferae)

Phoca vitulina (harbor seal)

Canis familiaris (dog)

Canis lupus (grey wolf)

Felis catus (house cat)

Viverra zibetha (Indian civet)

Mustela erminea (stoat)

Mustela furo (ferret)

Mustela lutreola (European mink)

Mustela putorius (wild ferret)

Ursus arctos (brown bear)

(Bestiae)

Sus scrofa (wild boar/pig)

Dasypus septemcinctus (seven-banded armadillo)

Dasypus novemcinctus (nine-banded armadillo)

Erinaceus europaeus (European hedgehog)

Talpa europaea (European mole)

Sorex araneus (common shrew)

Didelphis marsupialis (common opossum)

(Glires)

Rhinoceros unicornis (Indian rhinoceros)

Hystrix brachyura (Malayan porcupine)

Hystrix cristata (crested porcupine)

Lepus timidus (common hare)

Castor fiber (European beaver)

Mus musculus (house mouse)

Sciurus vulgaris (red squirrel)

(Pecora)

Camelus dromedarius (dromedary camel)

Camelus bactrianus (Asian camel)

Moschus moschiferus (musk deer)

Cervus elaphus (red deer)

Capra hircus (goat)

Capra ibex (Alpine ibex)

Ovis aries (sheep)

Bos taurus (cow)

Bos indicus (zebu)

(Belluae)

Equus caballus (horse)

Equus asinus (donkey)

Equus zebra (mountain zebra)

Hippopotamus amphibius (hippopotamus)

(Cete)

Monodon monoceros (narwhal)

Balaena mysticetus (bowhead whale)

Physeter macrocephalus (sperm whale)

Delphinus delphis (common dolphin)

"Aves"

(Accipitres)

Vultur gryphus (Andean condor)

Falco tinnunculus (common kenstrel)

Falco sparverius (sparrowhawk)

Falco columbarius (pigeonhawk)

Falco subbuteo (Eurasian hobby)

Falco rusticolus (gyrfalcon)

Strix aluco (tawny owl)

Lanius excubitor (great grey shrike)

Lanius collurio (red-backed shrike)

Lanius schach (long-tailed shrike)

(Picae)

Psittacus erithacus (grey parrot)

Ramphastos tucanus (white-throated toucan)

Buceros bicornis (great hornbill)

Buceros rhinoceros (rhinoceros hornbill)

Crotophaga ani (smooth-billed ani)

Corvus corax (raven)

Corvus corone (carrion crow)

Corvus frugilegus (rook)

Corvus cornix (hooded crow)

Coracias oriolus (golden oriole)

Coracias garrulus (European roller)

Gracula religiosa (hill myna)

Paradisaea apoda (greater bird-of-paradise)

Cuculus canorus (common cuckoo)

Jynx torquilla (wryneck)

Picus viridis (green woodpecker)

Sitta europaea (Eurasian nuthatch)

Merops apiaster (European bee-eater)

Merops viridis (blue-throated bee-eater)

Upupa epops (Eurasian hoopoe)

Certhia familiaris (Eurasian treecreeper)

Trochilus polytmus (red-billed streamertail hummingbird)

(Anseres)

Anas platyrhynchos (mallard duck)

Anas crecca (teal duck)

Mergus merganser (common merganser)

Mergus serrator (red-breasted merganser)

Alca torda (razorbill auk)

Procellaria aequinoctialis (white-chinned petrel)

Diomedea exulans (wandering albatross)

Pelecanus onocrotalus (great white pelican)

Phaeton aethereus (red-billed tropicbird)

Larus canus (common gull)

Larus marinus (great black-backed gull)

Larus fuscus (lesser black-backed gull)

Sterna hirundo (common tern)

Rhynchops niger (black skimmer)

(Grallae)

Phoenicopterus ruber (American flamingo)

Platalea leucorodia (Eurasian spoonbill)

Platalea ajaia (roseate spoonbill)

Mycteria americana (wood stork)

Ardea cinerea (grey heron)

Ardea herodias (blue heron)

Ardea alba (great egret)

Scolopax rusticola (Eurasian woodcock)

Charadrius hiaticula (ringed plover)

Charadrius alexandrinus (Kentish plover)

Charadrius vociferus (killdeer plover)

Charadrius morinellus (Eurasian dotterel)

Recurvirostra avosetta (pied avocet)

Haematopus ostralegus (Eurasian oystercatcher)

Fulica atra (Eurasian coot)

Rallus aquaticus (water rail)

Psophia crepitans (grey-winged trumpeter)

Otis tarda (great bustard)

Struthio camelus (ostrich)

(Gallinae)

Pavo cristatus (Indian peafowl)

Meleagris gallopavo (wild turkey)

Crax rubra (great curassow)

Phasianus colchicus (common pheasant)

Tetrao urogallus (western capercaillie)

(Passeres)

Columba oenas (stock dove)

Columba palumbus (wood pigeon)

Alauda arvensis (Eurasian skylark)

Sturnus vulgaris (European starling)

Turdus viscivorus (mistle thrush)

Turdus pilaris (fieldfare thrush)

Turdus iliacus (redwing thrush)

Turdus plumbeus (red-legged thrush)

Turdus torquatus (ring ouzel)

Turdus merula (blackbird)

Loxia curvirostra (crossbill)

Emberiza hortulana (ortolan bunting)

Emberiza citrinella (yellowhammer)

Emberiza calandra (corn bunting)

Fringilla coelebs (common chaffinch)

Motacilla alba (white wagtail)

Motacilla lava (yellow wagtail)

Parus major (great tit)

Hirundo rustica (barn swallow)

Caprimulgus europaeus (European nightjar)

"Amphibia"

(Reptiles)

Testudo graeca (Greek tortoise)

Draco volans (flying dragon)

Lacerta agilis (sand lizard)

Rana temporaria (common frog)

(Serpentes)

Crotalus horridus (timber rattlesnake)

Crotalus durissus (tropical rattlesnake)

Boa constrictor (common boa)

Coluber constrictor (eastern racer)

Anguis fragilis (slowworm)

Amphisbaena alba (red worm lizard)

Caecilia tentaculata (white-bellied caecilian)

(Nantes)

Petromyzon marinus (sea lamprey)

Raja clavata (thornback ray)

Raja miraletus (brown ray)

Squalus acanthias (spiny dogfish)

Chimaera monstrosa (rabbitfish)

Lophius piscatorius (anglerfish)

Acipenser sturio (sea sturgeon)

Acipenser ruthenus (sterlet sturgeon)

"Pisces"

(Apodes)

Muraena helena (Mediterranean moray)

Gymnotus carapo (banded knifefish)

Trichiurus lepturus (cutlassfish)

Anarhichas lupus (Atlantic wolffish)

Ammodytes tobianus (lesser sandeel)

Xiphias gladius (swordfish)

Stromateus fiatola (blue butterfish)

(Jugulares)

Callionymus lyra (common dragonet)

Uranoscopus scaber (stargazer)

Trachinus draco (greater weever)

Gadus morhua (Atlantic cod)

Blennius ocellaris (butterfly blenny)

Ophidion barbatum (snake cusk-eel)

(Thoracici)

Cyclopterus lumpus (lumpsucker)

Echeneis naucrates (sharksucker)

Coryphaena equiselis (pompano)

Coryphaena hippurus (dorado)

Gobius niger (black goby)

Govius paganellus (rock goby)

Cottus gobio (European bullhead)

Scorpaena porcus (black scorpionfish)

Scorpaena scrofa (red scorpionfish)

Zeus faber (John Dory)

Pleuronectes platessa (European plaice)

Chaetodon striatus (banded butterflyfish)

Chaetodon capistratus (foureye butterflyfish)

Sparus aurata (gilt-head bream)

Labrus merula (brown wrasse)

Labrus mixtus (cuckoo wrasse)

Labrus viridis (green wrasse)

Sciaena umbra (brown meagre)

Perca fluviatilis (European perch)

Gasterosteus aculeatus (three-spined stickleback)

Scomber scombrus (Atlanti mackerel)

Mullus barbatus (red mullet)

Mullus surmuletus (surmullet)

Trigla lyra (piper gurnard)

(Abdominales)

Cobitis taenia (spined loach)

Silurus asotus (Amur catfish)

Silurus glanis (Wels catfish)

Loricaria cataphracta (suckermouth catfish)

Salmo carpio (Garda trout)

Salmo trutta (brown trout)

Salmo salar (Atlantic salmon)

Fistularia tabacaria (bluespotted cornetfish)

Esox lucius (northern pike)

Argentina sphyraena (European argentine)

Atherina hepsetus (Mediterranean sand smelt)

Mugil cephalus (flathead mullet)

Exocoetus volitans (tropical flying fish)

Polynemus paradiseus (Paradise threadfin)

Clupea harengus (Atlantic herring)

Cyprinus carpio (common carp)

(Branchiostegi)

Mormyrus caschive (bottlenose elephantfish)

Balistes vetula (queen triggerfish)

Ostracion cornutus (longhorn cowfish)

Ostracion cubicus (yellow boxfish)

Tetraodon lineatus (Fahaka pufferfish)

Diodon hystrix (spot-fin porcupinefish)

Diodon holocanthus (long-spine porcupinefish)

Centriscus scutatus (grooved shrimpfish)

Syngnathus acus (common pipefish)

Syngnathus pelagicus (pelagic pipefish)

Syngnathus typhle (broad-nosed pipefish)

Pegasus volitans (longtail seamoth)

"Insecta"

(Coleoptera)

Scarabaeus sacer (sacred scarab)

Dermestes lardarius (larder beetle)

Dermestes murinus (larder beetle)

Hister unicolor (clown beetle)

Hister quadrimaculatus (clown beetle)

Silpha obscura (carrion beetle)

Cassida viridis (tortoise beetle)

Cassida nebulosa (tortoise beetle)

Cassida nobilis (tortoise beetle)

Coccinella trifasciata (ladybug)

Coccinella hieroglyphica (ladybug) [Coccinella 5-punctata, 7-punctata, 11-punctata, and 24-punctata survive as quinquepunctata, septempunctata, undecimpunctata, and vigintiquatorpunctata]

Chrysomela populi (leaf beetle)

Chrysomela lapponica (leaf beetle)

Chrysomela collaris (leaf beetle)

Chrysomela erythrocephala (leaf beetle)

Curculio nucum (nut weevil)

Attelabus surinamensis (leaf-rolling weevil)

Cerambyx cerdo (capricorn beetle)

Leptura quadrifasciata (longhorn beetle)

Cantharis fusca (soldier beetle)

Cantharis livida (soldier beetle)

Cantharis oscura (soldier beetle)

Cantharis rufa (soldier beetle)

Cantharis lateralis (soldier beetle)

Elater ferrugineus (rusty click beetle)

Cicindela campestris (green tiger beetle)

Cicindela sylvatica (wood tiger beetle)

Buprestis rustica (jewel beetle) [Buprestis 8-guttata survives as octoguttata]

Dytiscus latissimus (diving beetle)

Carabus coriaceus (ground beetle)

Carabus granulatus (ground beetle)

Carabus nitens (ground beetle)

Carabus hortensis (ground beetle)

Carabus violaceus (ground beetle)

Tenebrio molitor (mealworm)

Meloe algiricus (blister beetle)

Meloe proscarabaeus (blister beetle)

Meloe spec (blister beetle)

Mordela aculeata (tumbling glower beetle)

Necydalis major (longhorn beetle)

Staphylinus erythropterus (rove beetle)

Forficula auricularia (common earwig)

Blatta orientalis (Oriental cockroach)

Gryllus campestris (field cricket)

(Hemiptera)

Cicada orni (cicada)

Notonecta glauca (backswimmer)

Nepa cinerea (water scorpion)

Cimex lectularius (bedbug)

Aphis rumici (black aphid)

Aphis craccae (vetch aphid)

Coccus hesperidum (brown scale insect)

Thrips physapus (thrips)

Thrips minutissimum (thrips)

Thrips juniperinus (thrips)

(Lepidoptera)

Papilio paris (Paris peacock butterfly)

Papilio helenus (red Helen butterfly)

Papilio troilus (spicebush swallowtail butterfly)

Papilio deiphobus (Deiphobus swallowtail butterfly)

Papilio polytes (common Mormon butterfly)

Papilio glaucus (eastern tiger swallowtail butterfly)

Papilio memnon (great Mormon butterfly)

Papilio ulysses (Ulysses butterfly)

Papilio machaon (Old World swallowtail butterfly)

Papilio demoleus (lime swallowtail butterfly)

Papilio nireus (blue-banded swallowtail butterfly)

Papilio clytia (common mime butterfly)

Sphinx ligustri (privet hawk-moth)

Sphinx pinastri (pine hawk-moth) [genus Phalaena was suppressed, but seven subgenera created by Linnaeus are now valid as genera]

(Neuroptera)

Libellula depressa (chaser dragonfly)

Libellula quadrimaculata (four-spotted skimmer dragonfly)

Ephemera vulgata (mayfly)

Phryganea grandis (caddisfly)

Hemerobius humulinus (lacewing)

Panorpa communis (scorpionfly)

Panorpa germanica (scorpionfly)

Raphidia ophiopsis (snakefly)

(Hymenoptera)

Cynips quercusfolii (oak gall wasp)

Tenthredo atra (sawfly)

Tenthredo campestris (sawfly)

Tenthredo livida (sawfly)

Tenthredo mesomela (sawfly)

Tenthredo scrophulariae (sawfly)

Ichneumon extensorius (parasitoid wasp)

Ichneumon sarcitorius (parasitoid wasp)

Sphex ichneumoneus (digger wasp)

Vespa crabro (European hornet)

Apis mellifera (honey bee)

Formica fusca (silky ant)

Mutilla europaea (large velvet ant)

(Diptera)

Oestrus ovis (sheep botfly)

Tipula oleracea (marsh cranefly)

Tipula hortorum (cranefly)

Tipula lunata (cranefly)

Musca domestica (housefly)

Tabanus bovinus (pale horsefly)

Tabanus calens (horsefly)

Tabanus bromius (brown horsefly)

Tabanus occidentalis (horsefly)

Tabanus antarcticus (horsefly)

Culex pipiens (house mosquito)

Empis borealis (dance fly)

Empis pennipes (dance fly)

Empis livida (dance fly)

Conops flavipes (thick-headed fly)

Asilus barbarus (robberfly)

Asilus crabroniformis (hornet robberfly)

Bombylius major (bee fly)

Bombylius medius (bee fly)

Bombylius minor (bee fly)

Hippobosca equina (forest fly)

(Aptera)

Lepisma saccharina (silverfish)

Podura aquatica (water springtail)

Termes fatale (termite)

Pediculus humanus (human louse)

Pulex irritans (human flea)

Acarus siro (flour mite)

Phalangium opilio (harvestman)

Araneus angulatus (orb-weaving spider)

Araneus diadematus (European garden spider)

Araneus marmoreus (marbled orbweaver)

Araneus quadratus (four-spotted orbweaver -- last four are by Clerck 1757, some of the very few surviving pre-Linnean names!)

Scorpio maurus (large-clawed scorpion)

Cancer pagurus (brown crab)

Oniscus asellus (common woodlouse)

Scolopendra gigantea (giant centipede)

Scolopendra morsitans (red-headed centipede)

Julus fuscus (millipede)

Julus terrestris (millipede)

"Vermes"

(Intestina)

Gordius aquaticus (horsehair worm)

Lumbricus terrestris (common earthworm)

Ascaris lumbricoides (giant roundworm)

Fasciola hepatica (liver fluke)

Hirudo medicinalis (medicinal leech)

Myxine glutinosa (Atlantic hagfish)

Teredo navalis (shipworm)

[shout out to Furia infernalis, a terrifying carnivorous jumping worm that Linnaeus described, but which doesn't seem to actually exist]

(Mollusca)

Limax maximus (leopard slug)

Doris verrucosa (warty nudibranch)

Nereis caerulea (ragworm)

Nereis pelagica (ragworm)

Aphrodita aculeata (sea mouse)

Lernaea cyprinacea (anchor worm)

Scyllaea pelagica (Sargassum nudibranch)

Sepia officinalis (common cuttlefish)

Asterias rubens (common starfish)

Echinus esculentus (edible sea urchin)

(Testacea)

Chiton tuberculatus (West Indian green chiton)

Lepas anatifera (goose barnacle)

Pholas dactylus (common piddock)

Mya arenaria (softshell clam)

Mya truncata (truncate softshell)

Solen vagina (razor clam)

Tellina laevigata (smooth tellin)

Tellina linguafelis (cat-tongue tellin)

Tellina radiata (sunrise tellin)

Tellina scobinata (tellin)

Cardium costatum (ribbed cockle)

Donax cuneatus (wedge clam)

Donas denticulatus (wedge clam)

Donax trunculus (wedge clam)

Venus casina (Venus clam)

Venus verrucosa (warty venus)

Spondylus gaederopus (thorny oyster)

Spondylus regius (thorny oyster)

Chama lazarus (jewel box shell)

Chama gryphoides (jewel box shell)

Arca noae (Noah's ark shell)

Ostrea edulis (edible oyster)

Anomia aurita (saddle oyster)

Anomia ephippium (saddle oyster)

Anomia hysterita (saddle oyster)

Anomia lacunosa (saddle oyster)

Anomia spec (saddle oyster)

Anomia striatula (saddle oyster)

Mytilus edulis (blue mussel)

Pinna muricata (pen shell)

Pinna nobilis (fan mussel)

Pinna rudis (rough pen shell)

Argonauta argo (argonaut)

Nautilus pompilius (chambered nautilus)

Conus ammiralis (admiral cone snail)

Conus aulicus (princely cone snail)

Conus aurisiacus (cone snail)

Conus betulinus (betuline cone snail)

Conus bullatus (bubble cone snail)

Conus capitaneus (captain cone snail)

Conus cedonulli (cone snail)

Conus ebraeus (black-and-white cone snail)

Conus figulinus (fig cone snail)

Conus genuanus (garter cone snail)

Conus geographus (geographer cone snail)

Conus glaucus (glaucous cone snail)

Conus granulatus (cone snail)

Conus imperialis (imperial cone snail)

Conus litteratus (lettered cone snail)

Conus magus (magical cone snail)

Conus marmoreus (marbled cone snail)

Conus mercator (trader cone snail)

Conus miles (soldier cone snail)

Conus monachus (monastic cone snail)

Conus nobilis (noble cone snail)

Conus nussatella (cone snail)

Conus princeps (prince cone snail)

Conus spectrum (spectrecone snail)

Conus stercusmuscarum (fly-specked cone snail)

Conus striatus (striated cone snail)

Conus textile (cloth-of-gold cone snail)

Conus tulipa (tulip cone snail)

Conus varius (freckled cone snail)

Conus virgo (cone snail)

Cypraea tigris (tiger cowry shell)

Bulla ampulla (Pacific bubble shell)

Voluta ebraea (Hebrew volute)

Voluta musica (music volute)

Buccinum undatum (common whelk)

Strombus pugilis (fighting conch)

Murex tribulus (caltrop murex)

Trochus maculatus (maculated top shell)

Turbo acutangulus (turban shell)

Turbo argyrostomus (silver-mouth turban shell)

Turbo chrystostomus (gold-mouth turban shell)

Turbo marmoratus (green turban shell)

Turbo petholatus (turban shell)

Turbo sarmaticus (giant turban shell)

Helix lucorum (Mediterranean snail)

Helix pomatia (Roman snail)

Nerita albicilla (blotched nerite)

Nerita chamaeleon (nerite)

Nerita exuvia (snakeskin nerite)

Nerita grossa (nerite)

Nerita histrio (nerite)

Nerita peloronta (bleeding tooth)

Nerita plicata (nerite)

Nerita polita (nerite)

Nerita undata (nerite)

Haliotis asinina (ass-ear abalone)

Haliotis marmorata (marbled abalone)

Haliotis midae (South African abalone)

Haliotis parva (canaliculate abalone)

Haliotis tuberculata (green ormer)

Haliotis varia (common abalone)

Patella caerulea (Mediterranean limpet)

Patella pellucida (blue-rayed limpet)

Patella vulgata (European limpet)

Dentalium elephantinum (elephant tusk)

Dentalium entale (tusk shell)

[genus Serpula is still in use with none of its original species]

(Lithophyta)

Tubipora musica (organ pipe coral)

Millepora alcicornis (sea ginger fire coral)

Madrepora oculata (zigzag stone coral)

(Zoophyta)

Isis hippuris (sea bamboo)

Isis ochracea (sea bamboo)

Gorgonia flabellum (Venus fan)

Gorgonia ventalina (purple sea fan)

Alcyonium bursa (soft coral)

Alcyonium digitatum (dead man's fingers)

Tubularia indivisa (oaten ipes hydroid)

Corallina officinalis (coralline red alga)

Sertularia argentea (sea fern)

Sertularia cupressoides (hydroid)

Pennatula phosphorea (sea pen)

Taenia solium (pork tapeworm)

Volvox globator (colonial alga)

[genus Hydra is still in use with none of its original species]

#taxonomy #biology #history of science #uselesseffortpost #very long post

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wipsbymor · 9 months

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𝐨𝐜 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 : 𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐦

finally got tommy's intro together! i have such a soft spot for him, y'all have no idea <3 also, i'm very aware of the fact that that first picture is a picture of kelly nickels and that might be a bit too on the nose, but i just couldn't resist (tommy is a hot bassist, kelly is a hot bassist, i mean, the book practically writes itself). anyways, here he is!

nobody back home would've imagined that tommy—shy, reserved tommy salem—would become the most infamous partier in overconsumption, but fame does things to people. especially people who don't enjoy it.

tommy is, above all else, a person with an appreciation for the gentle things, things that can be hard to come by in the industry he's made a life for himself in. he's also a man of several bad habits that are quite difficult to break, but nobody's perfect, right? in reality, they're not so much habits as distractions from the eyes that constantly seem to be on the band nowadays, but tommy would never admit that, except maybe to his best friend since middle school, logan. he doesn't want to cause any problems with the rest of the band, or the public eye. that's rj's job.

tommy's just here for a good time.

𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ⋆｡°✩

full name: thomas ezra salem

age: 21 (1985)–tbd

birthday: november 5

pronouns: he/him

sexuality: heterosexual

ethnicity: white american

occupation: bassist for overconsumption

love interest(s): tigerlily caddigan, may costa

likes: motorcycling, foggy weather, privacy, adrenaline rushes, cool rocks, logan and may, slightly coarse textures, the eagles

dislikes: attention, the taste of warm water, confrontation, waking up in the middle of the night, big fish, seeing his friends unhappy, spiders

height: 5'9

build: inverted triangle

hair: long, curly, black

skin: light ivory

eyes: deep brown

noticeable features: gap between two front teeth, brittle nails from iron deficiency

𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ⋆｡°✩

⋆ one of these nights - eagles

⋆ who wants to be lonely - kiss

⋆ crazy - aerosmith

⋆ take me - kiss

⋆ rip it out - ace frehley

⋆ you shook me all night long - ac/dc

⋆ i want you - kiss

⋆ rock and roll all nite - kiss

⋆ take it easy - eagles

⋆ uh! all night - kiss

⋆ baby driver - kiss

⋆ speedin' back to my baby - ace frehley

⋆ tears are falling - kiss

⋆ king of the night time world - kiss

𝐟𝐮𝐧 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐬 ⋆｡°✩

he has an iron deficiency, which causes an incident where he faints onstage during a show

the original inspiration for him was a combination of duff mckagan and, please, god, forgive me, eddie munson (i'm not actually sorry)

he and may date each other for a time, but the relationship doesn't last

his first pet was a frog he found outside his house that he named don after don henley from the eagles, his favorite band

he's one of those dudes that wants, like, five kids when he's older, but at the same time he's scared of the idea of having even one because he doesn't know if he'd be a good dad or not

he and logan were the ones who started overconsumption

not much else to say to be honest, he's just babygirl, need i really say more?

#oc : tommy salem #wip : the nona incident!#my wips #my ocs #writeblr #creative writing #oc intro #oc introduction #meet the oc #meet my ocs #wipsbymor

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yourbelovedissy · 2 months

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FEBESTIARY 2024

Throughout all of February, I did an art challenge I called Febestiary! The idea is simple: make 5 diff picker wheels of different prompts based on various animal species, body types, biomes, art styles, and unique traits. Then, smack 'em all together! This is the result of my month-long artistic pursuit :3

Oh also, I waive all rights to these creature designs, and release them under the CC0 license. No rights reserved.

[ID: Eleven images, each showing a different original fantasy monster design, labeled Febestiary with the day, and a bullet point list of traits with a drawing.

Day 1: Cosmic Clam: Bivalve, asymetrical, cosmos, cool, herds, saber teeth, monogamous.

The cosmic clams are drawn flying through a starscale, with deep blue shells on one side and a spike for a tail, with soft pale flesh on the other side like an oyster.

Day 1: Mind Magma Money: primate, tripedal, lava beds, low effort, mind control, diurnal, scavenger.

The mind magma monkey has three legs and two arms, with dark fur striped with cream on the arms and legs and above the pink face. It holds a bone in one hand, with lines of green going from its head to the heads of stick figures with swirly eyes, showing they are brainwashed into doing the money's bidding, one of them offering it energy. The background is black rock and lava.

Day 2: Diplopoltus: Dolpocaulus, hexapedal, tir na nog, minimalist, strong smell, spectral, levitation.

The Diplopoltus is shown as a long, blue and white spectral creature with a curved head like a hammerhead shark, and six short legs with three toes. It has four clusters of whiskers on its head, and blank white eyes with slits for a nose. It floats over a fantastic blue field at night the stars covering the sky.

Day 2: David Bowfish: Walleye, bipedal, cosmos, low effort, telekenesis, supersonic roars, bright colors.

The David Blowfish is drawn as a bipedal fish standing on the surface of the moon. It has two fins on its back, one blue, one green, a dark green fin on its tail and matching duck-like feet, red legs and belly, and a body white on the face with a stripe of red around the eye, a thick black band in the center, and the end striped white and green. It telekinetically holds a walkie taklie and has its mouth open, calling into it.

Day 3: Voltacuda: Barracuda, hexapedal, digital, skeleton, venemous bite, scavenger, elemental kinesis.

The Voltacuda is drawn as the skeleton of a barracuda in a digital grid world, with cables sparking with blue electricity ectending from the head, tail, and fins.

Day 4: Digitulas: Tarantula, quadrupedal, nightmares, creepy, nocturnal, sexual dimorphism, hibernation.

There are two digitulas, shrouded behind hazy darkness making them very hard to see, with their six front eyes the easiest thing to see, white-ish with pupils that seem dark red. One is shorter and closer to the ground, the other is much taller, with long hair partially obscuring its eyes. Aside from vague outlines of spider-like limbs and bodies, nothing else can be seen clearly.

Day 5: Proffo Pelican: Pelican, hexapedal, jungles, cutesy, burrowing, eusocial, strong vision.

The Proffo pelican is drawn sitting, with a bird body that is mostly grey-tan, with darker brown on the head, belly, and tail. It has four dark webbed feet, a fan-shaped tail with a center white feather, and the others dark brown with an orange and red-shaped base. The belly is striped with dotted lines of white. Its wing is tan-grey with white tips, and folded. It has a long tall neck, with a yellow face, a round eye, and a pale orange beak that is red at the base, with a large, striped, red, orange, and pale orange pouch below the beak that is puffed up. Atop the head is a small swirl of white, and smaller white "whiskers" on the cheek. The eye has a white line like a cheetah trailing down.

Day 6: Flying Frankfarter: Canine, limbless, clouds, cool, clairvoyance, poison secretions, migration.

The Flying Frankfarter is drawn as a dark brown hotdot with the head of a dog wearing sunglasses, with yellow stripes along the back in loops, and the top of the head like mustard. It has no limbs except for a short fluffy tail. It farts out fire as it flies through the sky like a missile, with a compass in a thought bubble over its head to show it knows where it's going.

Day 7: Soaring Sea Sloth: Sloth, Aquatic, Islands, Ancient, undead, levitation, healing powers.

The Soaring Sea Sloth is drawn in a stylized form with a long head, two large paws or hands off to either side above and below, tipped with three long claws, a long body, and a tail that seems like backlegs used together, with three claw sets on either side. It has a row of dots along the neck and body, and two dots above each paw. The center of the body has five asymetrical partial rings around it like ribs. There is an overlay like smoke or an old map.

Day 8: Mantid Mast: Mantis, many-limbed, underworld, goofy, time travel, camoflage, immortality. The Mantis Mast is drawn as a swimming praying mantis with large cartoony eyes, and a body that is brown and shaped like a canoe, with the legs disguised as oars, ending in duck-like feet below the water. Semi-transparent swirls of ghosts perch on its back as they are ferried down the river, with one swimming besides it. The Mantid Mast has a watch around its neck like a collar or necklace.

Day 8: Cnitaurian: Cnidarian, centaurian, oceans, scary cute, elemental kinesis, chromatophores, strong vision. The Cnitaurian is drawn as a jelly-fish like creature that is partly transparent, with other parts lit up bright blue, red, purple, and yellow. It has a head like structure with two whit eyes, a shoulder structure like the bell of a jellyfish, and a lower body as another bell, appearing shaped like a centaur, with tentacles forming arms and legs. The inside shows all the connections of the tentacles, and small flecks of white like stars.

End ID.]

#issy art #febestiary #art challenge #public domain #spec evo #speculative biology #cc0 #fantasy creature

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whatnext10 · 2 years

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I Really Love Combining Photography and Drawing

I Really Love Combining Photography and Drawing shows readers a combination drawing and photograph. It also explains the artist’s background an the motivation for this piece.

Kaleidoscopic Spider I got my start as an artist when I took a drawing class in college. It was originally chosen as an “easy” (meaning no math!) non-science class to fulfill one of my liberal arts requirements for graduation. I knew there would be plenty of homework, but it would be very different from my usual studies, so I thought it might be fun. When I took the class I found that I really…

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#artwork #colorful spiders #fishing spiders #Florida nature #Florida spiders #Florida wildlife #large spiders #nature #nature inspired artwork #nature photographs #nature photography #photography #spiders #white banded fishing spider #wildlife #wildlife inspired artwork #wildlife photographs #wildlife photography

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messinwthkid · 9 months

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HERE IT IS.

THE BLUES BROTHERS BAND [+ FAMILY] AND WHAT PETS THEY WOULD HAVE:

JAKE:

jake seems like a classic dog guy, but at the same time i would absolutely see him with smth really fucking weird like he brings a snake in n is like "this is jake jr." would be mixed on walking a dog every single day.

ELWOOD:

he likes loud but doesn't at the same time, dog mayb ?? no, he would absolutely get like a fish or a cat- maybe both just for funsies. he wouldn't exactly get a pet tho officially, he would find smth in an alleyway that vaguely looks like a cat n go "hell yeah"

MACK:

DOG. BIG FLUFFY DOG. CRUSTY EYED WHITE DOG YOU NAME IT THIS MAN WOULD GET A DOG. fun n absolutely whimsical like him ! not much 2 say abt him unfortunately, but i am absolutely certain mack is a golden retriever dude

CURTIS:

i don't really think he'd actually get a pet ? curtis has lots on his plate already and pets are a lot to handle, but he probs has smth nice like a fish. fish are complicated yes, but he thinks he has the gist of it, likes to come down to the basement after a long day and put on a record, watch the fish swimming around and talk to it. has a fish care routine

BUSTER:

something ridiculous. elwood and sister mary do not trust this creature with animals so the closest thing would be some real "my first pet !!!1!1!" stuff like a hamster who gets lost in the bluesmobile on the way home from the store and is never found again. that or a skink he found in a puddle and decided was cool

CAB:

most likely a cat ! something sleek, smart and sort of mirrors him in a way. he likes how mischievous cats are along with the history and such of cats being worshipped and decides cats are pretty neat. absolutely not an animal person but warms up to the cat after a while and then devotes all of his possessions to it

SISTER MARY:

turtle. that's it. turtle. specifically the really angry one from the amazing world of gumball. yeah, the one that dried up but somehow lived ?? like cab, the turtle mirrors her in a way where it looks alright but will bite you if you come toward it. she has to feed it with a pair of tongs

ALAN:

a fish, just one though, and just one he will have. he watches the other bandmembers pets from time to time and doesn't exactly mind animals, just does not have the time or energy to be taking care of anything but himself at the moment with such a busy schedule being in the band and having like, every job ever in the highbrow end of town

TOM:

gerbil- i have no idea !!!! a rodent that's really strange looking but he absolutely adores it, shows it off to everyone and sacrifices things to it. the rodent is insane and tom doesn't keep it in an enclosure or anything overnight or if he's out so you just have to hope and pray u have not let the gerbil out into the street to commit mass crime

LOU:

doggie :] that or !!!! a bird :]]]] something whimsical like mack's animal choices. lou probably enjoys walks outside, song and something that finds interest in everything like a bird or a dog. even though you can't exactly walk a bird he will absolutely try, he will buy a little baby harness and take that bird for a walk down the street.

MURPH:

this man is a farm, he goes to pet supply stores just to take the crickets home [he has no animals that eat crickets, he just wants crickets], will get everything he sees. has a little crusty eyed white dog that he dresses up and goes full old lady mode on. ur honour murph is just a little old woman leave him alone in his farmhouse with his little creatures

WILLIE:

willie is absolutely strange and outspoken and i love him. he gets a spider, a cool little jumping spider that he hangs out with- it takes him a while to warm up to it as well, like others, but he ends up really appreciating insects n bugs more when he spends time watching his spider or letting it crawl on his hands, a desk or just around in its little house

STEVE:

this man gives off country boy cowgirl cowboy girl boy horsegirl energy and i will NOT accept anything else. steve is a horsegirl he goes to the stables n specifically choses this one horse to hang out with so much that it's straight up his horse now. country boyyyyy i loooove uuuuuuuu

DONALD:

crusty eyed white dog. this came up before with murph but istg he would be such a crust dog defender. "it's cute ! stop it !!" he can't even bring it to band practice anymore because the band think it's a creature from the underworld. his problem is he keeps getting them. he has one in the 70s that freaks the entire band out and then again in the 90s he's like "hey guys" and pulls out a CRUST DOG

MATT:

a bird :] something like lou but i think i'm leaning toward bird because birds are fun, annoying, musical and are great for loneliness. mrs. murphy hates the bird but matt will not take bird slander, tries to teach the bird to talk and has little conversations with it. animals in general trust him with just a look from how idk. trustworthy matt looks - i would trust him with my drink 100%

#blues brothers #HELLO #the long awaited post .......#idk why this took so long #probs from being burnt out n shid but ITS HERE #cannot be bothered tagging the entire band atm so remind me or smth ................... later

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lordeemailarchive · 1 year

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OUR SUN SETS — tour reflections edition

(28/03/2023) (Solar Institute Bulletin No. 21) (From Auckland)

She emerges! by Aleks Zaric

Hello darling friend, Whoaaaaah it’s been a minute since I wrote. Something died inside my laptop, and I’ve been putting off the repair for a few months (stubborn refusal to form a relationship with another bit of tech?), but the realisation that I was actively not doing my job due to not having one made me bite the bullet. How have you been??? Last time we spoke I was in South America, just about to turn twenty six, at the tail end of a big year of shows. Got off the plane in New Zealand and torpedoed straight into bed with a fevery cold, emerged a week later into the chaos of December, typically the start of the beautiful summer days here, instead that of several months of storms and humid rain. I wrote this, back then: “I’m playing this song my brother showed me, Mariella, over and over. It sounds like how I feel these days, soft with some pain, the voice of someone who’s touched a lot of beautiful things. This year has wrung me out. I’m a rag. I’m the t-shirts and underwear I hand-washed in so many hotel sinks. Christmas is a tall wave and I haven’t bought anyone gifts.” Always amused by the drama of the past self! Had some lush swims between the storms, cooked a lot of fish, set off on the Aus/NZ tour feeling relaxed and unwound.

Off grid bb.

A couple days ago, we played the last official sundial-and-eight-band-members show for Solar Power, the last of 70 shows in 20 countries (!!). I feel actual pride in myself, something that’s extremely hard for me to let myself feel, not just for completing it but for loving it, relaxing into it, feeling really open and free and not tight and fearful like tours past. I want to thank you for your part. I’ve always felt that pop music is a collaboration between artist and audience, that a pop song isn’t truly finished until listeners add their voices to it, and I think the same goes for your participation in the show. You show up and you sing every word, and all of our voices is what we all hear. At this stage in the piece I feel there are no casual fans, just people singing extremely loudly and clearly for 100+ minutes, and the commitment and generosity of this is not lost on me. The final show in Perth was an encapsulation of how special and right this tour has felt. We played at a beautiful grass and stone amphitheatre outside the city. I cried at soundcheck thanking the crew, overwhelmed by the love and care behind this group of people working so hard to get it right for me. At showtime the stars were clear and you could smell eucalyptus mixing with the smoke machine. We did the show for the last time looking over at one another and smiling, savouring all the last times we’d do things. I took my place for Royals and in the first flash of white light I saw a silk thread. In the next flash I followed the thread down to find a thick black spider, maybe an inch and a half long, two feet away from my eyes. I gasped and drew the microphone towards me, watched it slowly travel all the way back up the truss. Some kind of special omen.

Touring this record changed how I heard and saw the album — I wonder if you felt this too? — showed me that a work is constantly shifting and in progress, the definition changing all the time. Looking back yesterday at some of your pictures from the show, sourced by the very dedicated and special twitter account Lorde_fix, I realised that you give me the opportunity to see myself in states of power, glory, grace, sides of myself I don’t think I’d be able to access or see as clearly if not for these nights together.

Your pix I loveeeeee <333

I said onstage that night that making and touring this album has set so much right inside me, I truly think it’s bought me decades in this bizzzzniz, can’t wait to show you what I mean. I finish this chapter feeling for the first time not like I need to get away from the world but like I want to get deeper inside it, more countries, more flavours, more life. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Here’s a little Aus tour diary, by Aleks Zaric:

Moments after coming offstage in Perth

Levitating!

Makeup removal, and a scenario with MUNA that I cannot fucking explain -so special to have them join us on this run

11:52pm: standing on the stage in Sydney after you all went home.

So. Where to now? [REDACTED] I guess I’m not telling, not for a while. I’ll send you an update from time to time though, now that the laptop’s back online. Special books I’ve read recently: Notes by Eleanor Coppola My Phantoms by Gwendoline Riley Getting Lost by Annie Ernaux Second Place by Rachel Cusk Life’s Work by David Milch Dinner With Lenny by Jonathan Cott Books I’ve ordered: Love Me Tender - Constance Debre The Nature Book - Tom Comitta Small Fires - Rebecca May Johnson Animal Joy - Nuar Alsadir Alma Mahler’s diaries The People’s Hospital - Ricardo Nuila Idra Novey - Take What You Need Gwendoline Riley - First Love Jenny Odell - Saving Time

Oh, I had a party in December and made a really nice punch based off a post I saw from Stissing House. I’m copying the loose/made-up recipe here, give it a try if you like! 1 cup gin 1/2 cup chartreuse 1 1/2 cup green tea 1/2 cup pineapple 3 cups soda water 1/2 cup citrus (lemon/grapefruit/lime) Lots of fresh mint Topped up with extra citrus as the night went on.

Leaving you with a beautiful bit of fan art, basically how I envisioned the SP universe, a fitting way to say — for the last time — serve the bees… wear sunscreen… thank you and goodniiiiiiiiight! I love you so much. Speak soon, from somewhere, E

PS. BONUS SECRET CONTENT::: The pillow I commissioned from Bode for my dressing room before the tour started, feat. all the things that make me feel calm — grapefruit fruju, hibiscus, kissing, Pearl, books, bud.

(source: received this email)

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salmonskinrolltf · 2 years

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Anniversary Present - Pt. 4

Click here to read Part 3 and find out how Levi and Jace ended up in 1994. Or start at the beginning with Part 1.

“What the fuck do you mean I’m grounded?! I’m twenty-five fucking years old!” screamed Jace, his lank hair swinging in his face as he angrily jabbed his finger at his father, who sat across from him in the living room.

“I don’t care! Young man, you can’t expect to live under my roof and not follow my rules!” Levi shouted back. He clapped a hand on Jace’s shoulder and a shudder went through his body. “Oh shit… Jace.” He snapped his fingers in front of the grungey young man. “Remember who you are, Jace! Snap out of it!”

Jace’s eyes seem to unfocus for a second, then they snapped to attention. “Shit. The watch must have done something again.”

“It made you my son? Ew! It can do that?” Levi shivered with revulsion.

“We don’t know ANYTHING it’s capable of, really. But wait, why did it send us back? I thought we decided to stay in… whenever we came from. I can’t remember anymore.”

“I don’t know, maybe you jostled it when you were doing the dishes last night?”

“Well if that’s the case, then we wouldn’t be in this mess if you cleaned up after yourself for once in your life! You said you’d clear the table!”

“I was going to! I needed to recharge! I don’t have the ability to just up and do chores a second after fucking, you gotta cut me some slack!”

“You sure had enough energy to sit down and… whatever it is you were doing. I only remember you watching TV, but I KNOW I was mad about you doing something for yourself.”

“As if! You’re just mad I don’t do everything YOU want, WHEN you want it!”

“OK, OK. Let’s both just take a breath. We clearly need to resolve this issue, but we should probably do it in a timeline where we’re not fucking related. Also I can’t take you seriously when you’re dressed like that.” Jace pointed at Levi’s pink and blue shorts and hyper color tee.

“What’s wrong with these? I just bought them!” Levi complained.

“Focus, Levi! We can’t go forward, but we can go backward! What if we just jog a couple years backward and hope we end up the same age so we can talk about this like adults.”

“…Fine. But I still don’t see what’s wrong with fish. You LIKE fish.”

Jace tucked a strand of hair behind his ear. “Sure. It’s great. Keep wearing that forever. So when should we go to? 1991?”

Levi shook his head. “No, let’s go back to before T2 came out so I can see it again for the first time.”

Jace rolled his eyes. “Let’s do 1988 then. And then we can sort everything out and try to get us back to our real time.” He turned the dial back on the watch until it read 19:88.

FLASH

As if he had just stuck his fingers in an electrical socket, Jace’s long blonde hair began to stick straight into the air. The straw-yellow color began to fade to green, as if he had been swimming in an overchlorinated pool, before settling into an unnaturally bright snow cone blue. The strands hanging down at the side of his head vanished one by one as if invisible shears were running along them, rendering them into nothing but short stubble. The same thing happened to his face, as his mustache and goatee vanished as well.

He blinked and his eyes brightened to a cobalt blue, almost as dazzling as his new hair. He felt two pinpricks of pain as two spider-bite piercings poked their way out of his lower lip, giving him a tough, in-your-face look. One by one, the white stripes on his shirt filled in with dye, becoming a fully black shirt that blossomed with the logo for a punk band. His wrist suddenly felt heavy as a studded bracelet encircled it. He expected his thoughts and emotions to change somewhat, marking the final part of the change, but they didn’t. He still felt a deep well of rage in his chest, and he turned to look at Levi, ready to give the new him a piece of his mind.

Levi had taken off his shirt to better scratch at his chest, on which his copious fluffy mat of chest hair was slowly vanishing. As the individual hairs wriggled their way back into his skin, the fat on his torso drained away, leaving the faint shadow of abs and pecs on his skinny frame, only present because there was nothing to obscure them than rather than because he actually worked them out. Suddenly his torso vanished as a green Lacoste polo wrapped itself around him, the collar popping as the center stitched itself up in an unbroken line. His mustache also pulled itself back into his upper lip, the hair seeming to relocate to the top of his head, as his receding hairline pushed forward, his follicles working overtime to produce a gravity-defying quiff.

He grinned cockily and gave Jace a punch on the shoulder. “So, bro, what did you want to talk to me about?”

Jace rolled his eyes. He wanted to smack that cocky grin off his brother’s face, the preppy fuck. “I just wanted to ask if you could give me a ride to the Bad Religion show tonight?”

Levi grinned, clearly relishing the power he had over Jace. “Sorry bro, no can do. I’ve got field hockey practice all afternoon, you know that.”

Jace sighed. “Fine. I’ll take the fucking bus, you prick.” He exited the room, flipping Levi the bird as he grabbed his leather jacket from the hall table on his way out the door.

———

That evening, Jace bummed a ride from a friend he made at the concert.

As he walked back into the house, reeking of sweat and pot smoke, he noticed Levi sitting on the couch doing homework. He had changed into a knit sweater that made him look like he was an 80-year-old retiree. Jace was about to crack a joke about his outfit, but stopped when he noticed something. “Hey fuck-o, since when did you have chest hair?”

Levi looked at him suspiciously. “Since high school, man. It’s a Burt Reynolds thing. Guys dig it.”

Jace shook his head, confused, but not wanting to admit it. “Whatever. I’m going to bed.” As he walked up the stairs, the light glinted off the face of his watch, which now read 19:80.

Continue to Part 5

#Era #Punk #Preppy

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