#why cant we all just push for more help rather then

[delcakoo]

hiii emaaaa

ok so i have a request if you can write something for riki 😋

i have this like randommmm prompt in my head “can we js forget about it?” “you mean forget about when we kisse-“”STOP”.

like an e2l 🫣 if u can write it omg its totally okay if u cant!!

mua ily 💗

part 2

SUMMARY ! how is niki supposed to focus on biology when his shy tutor is so irresistible and fun to tease?

PAIRING ! jock!niki x tutor!gn!reader

WC ! 800

WARNINGS ! smooching in the library smh

a/n: lilly baby !! this prompt is so cute omg thank u for the req <3 i hope u enjoy and ilyt :D

3:39PM — being assigned to tutor the star player on your school’s basketball team — aka the biggest slacker of them all, nishimura riki — was probably the biggest obstacle you’d face during the entirety of your high school career.

you didn’t think he was unintelligible beyond saving — no, niki was rather quick with catching onto things when he actually tried. the real problem was that he preferred to stare at your pretty face (his words, not yours) all period then listen to the mumbo jumbo of you explaining the human body’s skeletal system to him, which turned out to be a detrimental issue during your sessions.

there you both sat; legs crossed and eyes focused as you point around different parts of the skeleton in your textbook while niki rested on his elbow, staring holes into the side of your face with a tiny smirk. every once in a while you pause and look up to ensure he’s listening, which he seemed to be doing okay at to your surprise.

“and right below the patella, we have the..?” you look up at niki with a questioning gaze, waiting for him to continue your sentence and demonstrate his listening.

the boy blinks, following your finger that’s pressed on the page, tapping the answer for him blatantly. then, he smiles, biting his lip mischievously. “mm.. if you recreate what we did at our last session, i’ll say it.”

you don’t need to pause and think to remember exactly what he’s referring to. gulping slightly, you glance off to the bookshelves nearby. “look, can we just forget about that?”

“what?” his expression grows brighter, enjoying your shy reactions to the fullest, “forget about when we kissed?”

“niki, stop talking so loud-“

“why? does it make you nervous?” you don’t reply, turning away only for him to lean over the desk to see you better. “ay,” he snickers, “what’s that on your face, y/n? are you blushing for me?” he giggles proudly, reaching over to push some hair behind your ear, successfully revealing more of the apple color painting your cheeks.

the only reason you’d agreed to the whole mess that ocurred last week was because niki promised to study for his upcoming test in return, which he did. in fact — he passed with flying colors, and it only encouraged you more to help him one way or another. the potential he held was begging for assistance, and if a kiss was the cost of that, it was a price you were willing to pay.

and maybe, just maybe because deep down, you’ve been wanting to kiss him as well. niki didn’t need to know that, though.

“shut up, that was for the sake of your grades, and grades alone,” you insist sternly. “now answer my question, what’s below the catella?”

“c’mon, don’t act like you didn’t enjoy it too.” annoyingly, the jock dodges your inquiry, much too intrigued with the new conversation at hand.

“yeah well i- i didn’t.” shit, did you have to stutter now of all times?

before you could process anything, niki gently grabs your jaw, angling it back towards him softly. he waits for any signs of protest while staring down at you, curly black bangs covering parts of his sharp eyes, challenge burning in them at your previous denial. when you don’t push him away, he grins cheekily before bending down to meet your lips.

the kiss was soft and quick, but the plushness and confidence in his movements still made your head dizzy even as he pulled back and surveyed your dazed features, all while licking his lips again to taste the remnants of your own.

“how about that one?” he demands.

it takes you a moment to come back to earth, shaking your head dumbly as you realize he’s asking you to rate his kissing skills. “i- it was alright..”

his tongue clicks in offense, scooting closer to you with a damaged ego and flaring determination. “never would’ve thought my little tutor would be so hard to please.” as you open your mouth to protest, niki’s lips are back on yours, and this time he’s holding the back of your neck to deepen the contact as his other hand reaches over to slam your textbook shut, making you flinch slightly in his hold. “fuck bio,” he murmurs against your lips, “i can’t let you bruise my pride like that and get away with it.”

you gulp, glancing at the library clock only to have your eyes widen in horror. shit. your session with niki ended three minutes ago, and pretty much all you’ve done is make out.

yet.. you can’t find it in you to complain when the pretty boy leans back down for more.

basketball player niki,, 😇

#delcakoo #delcakoo requests #lilly! #enhypen imagines #enhypen fics #enhypen fluff #niki x reader #niki x you #niki fics #niki imagines #niki fluff #nishimura riki imagines #nishimura riki fic #nishimura riki #nishimura riki fics #nishimura riki x reader #niki drabbles #enhypen #niki fic #niki fanfic #enhypen niki #enhypen drabbles #enhypen x reader #enhypen imagine #enhypen blurbs #enhypen fic #enhypen reactions #enhypen soft hours #enhypen timestamps #enhypen scenarios

[ist4rgirlo]

─ 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐝 - 𝐜.𝐟 : 𝐈𝐈

Summary: Now that your life has turned upside down, are you still willing to put your siblings' feelings first? Or would you rather fight for your feelings and do what makes you happy regardless of the consequences that might result in the future?

Prev ; Next || Conrad Fisher x fem!reader || My blog

Warnings: S2 SPOILERS! panic attacks (lmk if i missed anything!)

SEQUEL TO BEFORE EVERYTHING HAPPENED.

───────────────────────────

Belly's Pov

Me and Jeremiah decided to go to Aunt Julia's house — just to try to talk to her, maybe we can do something — maybe we can stop her from trying to sell the house.

We even decided to buy her flowers as an offering. As we arrived to her house, I took a deep breath and decided to hop out of the car —Jeremiah following behind me. I walked towards the door with Jeremiah beside me before ringing the door bell.

Aunt Julia opened the door before saying "Can I help you?" she asked. Jeremiah walked towards her and hugged her "Hey Aunt Julia" he said smiling — before pulling away. "Uh uhm Conrad told me you were here"

Aunt Julia looked at Jeremiah "Oh Jeremiah" she paused "and you are?" referring to me "I am Belly, Belly Conklin. Laurel Park’s daughter, Susannah's bestfriend" I told her smiling gently — giving her the flowers that I was holding.

"Oh wow, it's been so long" she said, scratching her forehead. "Uhm, we just wanted to say hi and maybe talk a little bit" Jeremiah chuckled before looking at her and smiling.

"Look uhm if its about the house, I'm sorry. It's decided" Aunt Julia said — smiling gently. Jeremiah's mouth frowned.

"Uhm we're actually doing an open house tomorrow."

"You.. you have to know how much that house means to Jeremiah and Conrad. That was their place, how-how can you let go of such a-a magical place?" I asked Aunt Julia.

"I remember her calling it that" Aunt Julia paused "But i-it's not personal" Jeremiah looked at her — brows furrowed "I bet" Jeremiah smiled sarcastically.

"I'm sorry, I have to go back to work" Aunt Julia said before closing the door. I looked at Jeremiah — I place my hand on his shoulder and patted it. We walked towards the car and drove off.

"I'm sorry, Jere" Jeremiah looked at me "It's okay, we cant really change someone's mind" he said — placing a hand on my shoulder.

TIME SKIP

"Where'd you guys go?" Conrad asked — his hair wet, he was wearing a surf suit. "We went to Aunt Julia's house" Jeremiah sighed.

Conrad face started to fill with hope "H-how did it go?" I looked at him "She's sure about this, Conrad. I don't think we can change her mind." I said -- he nodded before saying "Ofcourse"

───────────────────────────

It seems like the news that we were here in Cousins have spread fast as Taylor and Steven are on the way here. Apparently, me and Taylor were bad at lying thats why Steven knew about it immediately.

I hoped that Y/N was with them but Steven said no. He tried to push her to go but she said she need to do much more important things, I just miss her. We all thought that this news would make her come here but we were wrong.

Conrad and Jeremiah decided to talk to their dad. “Dad should be calling soon” Conrad said, informing Jeremiah.

“Do you guys want to talk to him alone?” I asked — not wanting them to be weirded out that I was there. “I-I can wait upstairs.”

As Jeremiah sat down, Conrad looked at me before saying “You helped me and J get this far. Plus its your house as much as it is ours” he smiled gently. I sat down as the phone started to ring.

AFTER A FEW MINUTES

We did everything, everything to save the house. Nothing is working, their dad is just letting it go. He just kept on sayong that it was legally Aunt Julia’s — it seemed like he never cared for it, for the house.

As the call ended, Taylor and Steven arrived to the house, surprising Conrad and Jeremiah. They were confused about why we looked down — I forgot to tell them that the house is on sale.

“We’re losing the house” Jeremiah said, sighing. “They’re putting it up for sale”

“Oh Cinderbelly” Taylor said as I stood up to hug her.

───────────────────────────

Conrad’s Pov

Here I was again, looking for her. Trying to see if she came with Steven and Taylor but no. She hasn’t even responded to my text. Maybe she’s busy.

I walked towards Jeremiah, sitting down beside him. “Hey” I said, patting his shoulder.

“You know, I thought I could convince dad. I thought we could” He sighed.

I nodded and sighed “I thought so too.” chuckling a little bit.

“It’s just.. it feels like everything is slipping away and-and the house is the only thing - the last thing tying us together” It was true, it did feel like it — we didn’t expect that we’d get together like this, that we’d be complete because of this reason.

“We’re not giving up, Jere” I looked at him shaking my head “We’re going to do something about it, I don’t have a plan. Not yet but I’ll do everything, we’ll figure ig out together.” I told Jeremiah. He nodded.

“I-I just hope she’s here, she’s the only one missing Connie” Jeremiah said — referring to Y/N. She just made everything less worse for everyone, I hope she was here too.

“Me too, Jere. Me too” I paused “You know, we should hang out tomorrow. Just all of us staying here for open house, that’d be a good plan” I chuckled

Jeremiah chuckled then nodded “Yeah we should definitely do that”

TIME SKIP

As me and Jeremiah got done talking we went inside the house and decided to hang out with the rest. They all sat down in their own places. “So what do you guys want to watch?” I asked.

“We should do… this one” Belly said — holding up mom’s favorite movie. I smiled taking it from her hands as I walked towards the tv — i mouthed a “thank you” to Belly.

After that, I went and sat the down on the other couch until I looked at my phone — recieving a text. I felt my chest tighten, I need to get out of the house. I stood up from my seat and went straight to the beach.

It was happening again, It attacked me again. I couldn’t breathe, it felt like someone was choking me. I pulled out my phone again — looking if the text was real, it was, I got in but what about Jeremiah, I can’t.

My mind filled with worried, with anxiety, not until another text popped up. It was like a coincidence, the text — my breathing is okay now, my heart is beating at a normal pace. The text was from the one that I have been waiting for.

She responded, it was from Y/N. She was going to come here, she’s coming here to Cousin. We’re complete now.

───────────────────────────

taglist : @maybankslover @urmomisafinewoman @user3729107491 @melllinaa @anthgoldenhrry @arunabrak @amj2277 @whoisalexa @remuslupinwifee @gulphulp @layanderson @astrvalee @goldenmoonbeam @podiumprincess @johannelis2302nely @silcintilla @smw-96 @apollo3475 @drikawinchester @fangirl-kimora @sanjanapm @milyswrld @scysuxx @starkeylover @fallingforel @mysticalstarlightflower @ifilwtmfc

the next part is here !! hope everyone likes it :)) lmk if y’all have requests and if you guys want to get tagged <3

love lots !!

#Spotify #tsitp #tsitp conrad #tsitp belly #tsitp jeremiah #tsitp steven #tsitp steven conklin #tsitp conrad fisher #tsitp fic #tsitp fanfic #tsitp imagine #conrad fisher #jeremiah fisher #steven conklin #conrad fisher imagine #conrad fisher x you #conrad fisher fanfic #conrad fisher fic #conrad fisher x reader #the summer i turned pretty #abtconrad fics #after everything that happened fic #conrad fisher x y/n

[sukiipjs]

✮ BLONDIE : PT 1

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↳ nick sturniolo x masc reader

↳ words - 2239

↳ summary - you’ve been having a hard time realizing and accepting the fact that you’re gay, and in love with your best friend. you try to ignore the feelings but that only makes everything worse until you can’t hide it anymore.

↳ contains - swearing, angst, use of y/n, internalized homophobia, depression, crying, idk??? [READ PT 2 - PT 3]

↳ song - blondie by current joys

°:. *₊ ° . ☆ °:. *₊ ° . ° .•

°:. *₊ ° . ☆

nick has been my best friend for years, he’s always been there for me, and me there for him. we met in the first grade when he saw me alone at recess on the swings and he ran up to me, asking if i wanted to play with him and his brothers. one of the many things i love about him, hes always there, always there to help, or just be with. from that day on he’s always been my number one but honestly, i’ve been kind of avoiding him lately.

of course i don’t want to, i really really don’t want to, trust me, but i don’t want to make anything bad between us either. even though pushing him away is probably fucking things up anyway.

the thing is, for months, maybe even years now i think that i might be coming to a realization: i think i’m gay, or not gay but bi? i hate labels, i dont want to be put into a box, its honestly just hard to fit into one too. i mean i’ve had girlfriends before and i’ve liked that, but nick…

okay i might be coming to another realization: i think i’m in love with nick. and to make everything worse, i can’t even talk to anyone about this because the only person i would tell is nick, but if i told him, well i just cant, it could destroy our friendship. he’d hate me, i cant lose him.

but maybe i’m not in love with him, i mean i love nick, i always have but maybe its not love love? maybe its just me appreciating our friendship more. okay who am i kidding it’s definitely becoming more, I LOVE HIM. he’s just perfect, in general, to me, to everyone. i want to spend every moment of my life with him, i want to hug him and never let him go, i want to be with him, i just want to see him again.

i can’t even imagine what he’d say if he knew i liked him. he’d probably be disgusted, i’d ruin our friendship forever. i cant do that, i can’t risk anything like that, i need him even if that means the best thing i can do is just stay away, make up lies of why i cant hang out, slowly stop texting him, i mean maybe it's not the best thing but its either i do this and try and force these feelings down or i tell him and ruin everything. this is better, or at least that’s what i keep telling myself.

☆ °:. *₊ ° . °

nick 🫶

| wanna hang out today? haven’t seen you in forever, i’m boredddd

| i know i’m sorry, but i cant today, really really sorry. still not feeling good

| that’s okay, hope you feel better though 💕 if you need anything tell me okay?

| i’d rather hang out with you and get sick then spend one more second with my idiot brothers over here 💀

i stare at the message on my screen, i’m not sick, i’m just trying to be a good friend… by avoiding my best friend… sure, whatever.

i slam down my phone on my mattress, rolling over and burying my face in my pillow. muffled screams from my mouth as tears, start to pour from my eyes. every time i message him, saying i cant hang out i immediately regret it. i want to see him, i always do but again, i cant, i fucking cant. it would only make my feelings stronger and i just need to get rid of them as soon as i can so things can just go back to how they were.

fuck, here comes the spiral that ive been replaying in my head forever. do i even really like him? am i really bi, gay, straight, whatever the fuck? i don’t even know, it’s all too confusing and stressful right now. why can’t i just be me? and have my best friend with me again? actually hang out with him, see him?

all i can really do right now is continue screaming and crying into my pillow about how much of a shitty friend i’m being, great. I constantly stalk his instagram, trying to see if i do really like him and try to see what he’s up to without me, i miss him so much.

…i wish he was a girl then i would be straight and all this shit wouldn’t hurt so much. i’m not trying to say that being gay is bad, all i’m saying is that it would be easier to figure all this out if i was straight and he was a girl. i know that’s so messed up to say but i don’t know how else to put it.

if he was a girl, i’d know that i’m in love with him, i wouldn’t be so afraid to accept myself because there wouldn’t be anything to accept. i’d just be me and he’d she’d be him her, i’d get to be his her boyfriend and we’d be a happy couple. i’d be happy and i wouldn’t have to push the person i love most in this stupid world away…

i smash my face into my silky white pillowcase over and over, shaking my head as i force the sides of the pillow into my face more. i want to suffocate.

i scream into my pillow more and more. ‘i love you nick, i love you nick, i love you. i DONT love you nick, i DONT love you nick, i DONT love you… but i do, i really really do, but i cant… i really really fucking cant.’

°:. *₊ ° . ☆

i stay rotting in my bed, spiraling about random shit, taking random quizzes of ‘am i gay?’ or ‘am i in love with my bestfriend?’ or ‘is it a crush?’ like i know.

soft blankets cover me, my silky pillows supporting my back as i rewatch rupaul's drag race on my computer until i finish it again, oreos and empty dr pepper cans surround me. and of course, nick always in my mind, everything reminding me of him, those stupid quizzes, his favorite show, his favorite drink. i wish he could be here, like how we used to hang out before i started ruining everything but i could be ruining it more, at least im keeping my mouth shut.

every once and a while, a message from nick pops up. him sending me a tiktok or telling me about how spacecamp is going or just something random, asking how im doing, if im still sick. most times i try to ignore him, turning off the notifications but i answer sometimes, only one or two words, maybe just an emoji, just trying to say something. i don’t want him to think i hate him or anything, i still of course love him.

the only time i ever get up from my bed is to go the the bathroom or get more food, ive been wearing the same two sweatpants alternating them and random shirts that i throw on the floor after i wear them for enough. my hair shaggy and a scratchy stubble on my face. i look and feel gross. i didnt think that forcing my best friend away and trying to figure out my sexuality could make me this depressed, who knew.

☆ °:. *₊ ° . °

weeks pass of me ignoring (or at least trying to ignore) nick and weeks of screaming into my sheets and sleeping all day become more and more. i finally decide to leave my apartment and stock up on some random things that will help me rot in my room even more: coffee, chips, oreos, whatever else i might want.

as i scan the aisle for dr pepper, standing in my gray hoodie with the hood covering me and one of the two sweatpants i’ve been wearing on, i hear a voice at the end of the row calling to me, “y/n?” my head turns to see who knows me that’s here, about to see how disgusting i look and just my luck, it’s nick.

“nick” a bright smile floods my face, i haven’t seen him for what seems like forever, i look at his blonde hair with grown out brunette roots, plus that signature nose ring and star earrings, of course he looks great.

he runs up to me, giving me a warm hug as he smiles too, “oh my god i haven’t seen you in decadessss” he exaggerates, laughing at me, “you feeling better now?” i tilt my head a little, confused but then i remember my lie. “oh yeah, i am. even though i dont look it” i try to scoff a laugh, looking down at myself, excusing how ‘i dont care’ i look right now.

“you look fine.” he laughs back again, “you know… me, chris and matt were gonna go out for dinner soon, wanna come?” i can tell he really wants me to be there and i really want to but i try to push it away, still.

“uhhh, i think had something later, sorry” my small smile slowly fading as his does too, i don’t think i’ve seen his smile leave that fast. “really? we haven’t talked in weeks, i miss you” he jokes a little, but really we do miss each other.

“i know, i’m sorry, but i promise we’ll hang out soon yeah?” i try to fake a small smile, trying to make this a little better but nick still looks sad, “yeah okay, see you later then?” he looks like he hates me, he looks just annoyed, hurt. i feel terrible.

“yeah, later” i’m about to walk closer to give him another hug but he leaves, to i assume go find his brothers, before i can. i’m terrible.

i finish up grabbing my things before leaving and driving off, replaying our interaction in my head. i could’ve just went? it was one dinner, that’s all. not a big deal. but it’s too late, it would just be weird if my schedule suddenly cleared up now.

°:. *₊ ° . ☆

i make my way back to my apartment, putting my bags down on the counter before going straight to my room again, flopping down on top of the pile of blankets and stuffed animals that cover my bed.

i dig in my pocket for my phone, taking it out as i grab a blanket to pull it over my face, closing off the sun that shines through my window.

i go straight to me and nicks messages, thinking of texting him. ‘i’m sorry’ too short, plain. ‘sorry, i was wrong i can go’ feels like i’m pitying him, plus just dumb. ‘i love you’ yeah definitely not. ‘come over? sorry’ again, stupid and he can NOT see the mess i have over here.

i decide on nothing and put my phone to the side of me, burying my head into my pillows again, tears flooding my eyes again again again. it’s too much. this is all stupid and i need to get over it all. this is terrible.

i go back to my cycle of curling up in warm blankets, eating my now new oreos and dr pepper and rewatching shows i’ve seen a million times before. and obviously stalking nicks instagram, he posted a story of him and his brothers at dinner. he’s still wearing those earrings and that same beige jacket he was wearing before, and he still looks great.

i swipe up, about to message him. ‘you look great, sorry i couldn’t come’ i quickly delete it and just like the story. i need to stop trying to message him when i’m trying to ignore him.

₊ ° .☆ °:. *₊

after falling asleep shortly after i finished looking at nicks story i wake up to like five texts from who? nick, of course.

nick 🫶

| are you ignoring me?

| like did i do something or what?

| are you okay?

| can we just talk or hang out please?

| y/n?

| okay sorry actually, never mind

my heart drops, i feel so TERRIBLE. nick did nothing and i never want him to think that he did something wrong. he’s perfect.

i pick up my phone to respond but honesty i don’t know if i should… i want him to know that he did nothing but he’s right about me ignoring him… fuck this. i just ignore him, still.

i shut off my phone fast and roll to my other side, curling up my legs and staring at the small textured bumps on the off-white wall that i face. i take in every detail, trying to distract myself with something else. i spot all the tiny discolorations or stains on the wall, the way it all starts to blur when tears, again, rain out my eyes.

they drip on the curves of my cheeks and lips, my hands are tucked under my legs as he tears drop onto my sheets, i don’t bother wiping them off. they make a small circle ish shape when it hits on my bed with a darker gray on my gray sheets.

my spiraling hits again when the ridges on my wall go dark as my eyes close. why can’t my best friend just be my best friend? why can’t i just be a normal person? why can’t i just forget it all? why can’t this all just go away? why? why? why? why?

☆ °:. *₊ ° . °

taglist : @slutforchriss @mattsleftnipple03 @mattsdinosweater @ccolleenn @mixvchelle @leah-loves-lilies @sturn-wrld @redz0nez9 @cheriematt @freshloveforthefit @nickuniversity @whore4matt @txssvx @will-yummy

#chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo smut #sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo smut #nicolas sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo x reader #sturniolo triplets x reader #sturniolo #𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢𝐢𝐩𝐣𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝜗𝜚⋆ #sukiipjs #𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢𝐢𝐩𝐣𝐬 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐬 𝜗𝜚⋆

[iouinotes]

Show-off | Mike Ross

pairing: Mike Ross x female!reader

show: Suits

genre: smut word count: 2,9k

summary: you and your co-worker Mike dont get along very well. But when you have something that he needs, suddenly everything is different.

a/n: Just watched the first two episodes of "Suits" and something about Mike is really attractive-

Working in a well-known office as a lawyer has it's advantages. Such as being respected by business people or being able to afford a lot of things, you spend all your evenings analyzing documents rather than meeting actual people.

Nevertheless, sometimes there are also negative factors. For example, my co-worker Mike, who really believes, that he is with his ridiculously skinny tie and sarcastic humor better than the others. Or right now, better than me.

"God, I cant believe you. Can you behave for once?" I use my fingers to push my hair back in frustration, noticing how my head starts to hurt. Its 10 pm and I'm currently trying to stay calm, though because of one man in particular, my nerves seem to be getting thinner within seconds. Valuable time is wasted that I could spend somewhere else instead of with him.

"Now it's my fault, that you don't have the documents with you? Sorry, I can't help you being organized in your own workplace." His voice irritates me. Everything about him is so frustrating.

"I told you, I didnt get the message! How am I supposed to know, that you need something, when you don't tell me anything about it? Maybe you should stop being so childish and ask me in the first place, instead of running to Rachel!" If our job had nothing to do with justice and we werent literally standing in a law company right now, I would kill him. And then I wouldn't hesitate to go to court and say it was self-defense, because I didnt want to hear any of his miserable excuses anymore.

"So what do you think, I should do? I need these documents for tomorrow. Please, I know you don't like me, but it is really urgent." Why does he has such blue eyes? The look he is going me is even more irritating than his voice.

I sign, exhibit my laptop and try to put the pens back, that are laying all over my desk.

"Okay, fine. As I said, the documents are at home, so-" I don´t even get to finish my sentence.

"Great, so I'll meet you there. And I wont even tell anyone, if your place is a mess." His eyes wander over my messy desk, and even If I don´t like to admit it, it's a bad habit of mine. But, he shouldn't make any assumptions about the neatness in my apartment.

"I hope you loose the documents on your way home." At my words, he grins smugly.

"Well, then I could lie and say you didnt found them anymore and I hadnt had the chance to go through them." He leans towards me.

"I'll run you over with my car." He raises his eyebrows at my threat.

"You sure should do something that makes you smile more often. Is that even something you know how to do?" I show him my middle finger and turn to left my office. When I close the door, I hear the laughter in his voice.

"The next storm should be named after you as quickly as you left the room." He follows after me.

"Can you shut up for once? Oh, I forgot. You don´t last one second being silent. Thats a shame, the world could finally heal." His hand rests on his heart, his features fake a hurt expression.

"Ouch. You really don´t like me that much, huh?" His eyes try to search mine.

"You get on my nerves on purpose every fucking day. Should I thank you for that?" I turn my head to look at him.

"Yes, you should. Your life would be so boring without me." He grins at me again from the side, that typical grimace that is always adorn on his face.

"You wish." When I tell him my address, he raises his eyebrows, but before he can make an unfavorable comment, I get into my car.

Darkness surrounds me and when I see him going away, I lower my head to the steering wheel. He really is the best at confusing my emotions.

~~~~~

I turn off the lights of my car and get out of it, so I can finally make my way to my flat. Its not something special, I mean I have a living room, which is quite big and connected to the kitchen, a bedroom and a bath. But I am very lucky, because I have a small balcony, from which I can watch the stars at night. But I usually only do that when I can't sleep.

So, when I enter my apartment, I let my eyes wander over the manageable mess, I put some clothes back in the closet and the dishes in the washing machine. The place almost looks decent, when I hear the doorbell.

As I open the door, I'm nervous for some reason. I let him in and turn to my office drawers, looking for the document.

"Nice place. You live here alone?" His fingers trace my bookshelf, I see him reading the titles.

"No, my wife is still at work." When I look at him dead serious, I see him laugh in surprise.

"So, you do have humor. I thought, you were one of those exceptions that wouldn't be able to do that." He means it as a joke, but something in my chest hurts.

When I reply with a monotonous voice, I see his eyebrows pull together. "I live here alone. That's what you wanted to hear?" I'm getting more frustrated again with every second he's around me.

"No- I didnt mean it that way. I'm sorry. My intentions were good, I promise." When I look at him for a moment, I see his honest expression.

It would be so easier for me to hate him, if I didnt know, he was a good human. Well, most of the time.

We are silent for a moment, but when I hear his footsteps, I tense up.

"What are you doing?" He's now standing right next to me.

"Helping you. You seem a little, tense?" I glare at him for a moment and he raises his hands in defense.

"Just pointed out the obvious. But dont worry. You still look lovely." I stop in my movements at his words.

"Thats such shock for you?" His voice shows surprise and a certain curiosity.

"Only that you say it." I look into his eyes.

"Well, you may think I'm dumb, but I'm not blind."

He just called me beautiful, sort of. It´s confusing me.

When I finally find the documents, I hold my hand out to him.

"I don´t think you are dumb. I think you're annoying. And a show-off. I don´t like that." His eyes follow me.

"What do you like then?" His question surprises me. He slowly takes the documents out of my hand, his finger gently brushing mine.

"I don´t think that is any of your business." I try to clear my voice. His touch makes me shiver.

"Come on, tell me. Would that be so bad?" His whole presence is making me nervous and I feel my hands start to shake.

At work, I can always hide behind a mask, pretend that nothing he does affects me. I can act like I truly hate him, even though I catch myself looking at him, from time to time. Especially when he shows off his intelligence without realizing it, impresses his clients and -I would never admit it- me too. It's a certain charm about him, the way he always knows how to answer, while being mischievous and clever about it.

But now, that he's in my apartment and so close to me, it's suddenly different. And I don't know how to react to him being nice.

"I look for someone who isnt afraid of commitment. Someone who is honest and kind, but who also challenges me. I want to feel safe, so I can put my trust not only in myself."

He nods and is quiet for a moment, I begin to feel stupid for telling him all of that, when he responds.

"I get that. Someone whose shoulder you can lean on when things get too much. Someone who meets your needs, who wants to be in your life. For longer than a one-night stand." He smiles at me and I see for the first time, why I possibly could like him.

"Also, statistics show higher rates of being robbed or kidnapped, when you have one-night stands." This remark almost makes me laugh, even though it's frightening.

"Well, who would even notice, if I would disappear? Probably only my clients, because they need me." I lower my head, being completely honest with him for the first time.

"I would notice."

When I look at him, he takes a step towards me. His fingers gently slide over my shoulder and brush my hair aside, the touch makes a warm feeling bloom in my chest.

"I couldn't annoy you anymore. My life would be pretty boring without you. And it's not so bad to be able to look at such a pretty face every day, even if it always looks at me annoyed, like all the time." I quietly laugh at that, feeling surprisingly good because of his compliment.

We look at each other, now being really close. My eyes travel to his lips and I don´t even know how it happens, but suddenly he is all over me. His lips on mine, his hands on my waist, lifting me up to sit me on the desk. I moan softly when his hands tangle in my hair and he pushes himself closer to me, so that he's standing between my legs. One of his hands gently wraps around my neck and I feel my loud pulse.

My hands move too, stroking his back and holding him closer to me by his tie. As he pulls his lips away from me, he lifts my chin with his finger. Now, looking down at me with widen pupils. I hold his eye contact, forgetting all about my issues with him, when he speaks to me with a deep voice (which I suddenly don´t think sounds irritating anymore).

"Be angry at me tomorrow and mine for tonight. I bet, all your frustration from work and your thin nerves can catch a break, what do you say?"

Not much. Because I pull him towards me by his tie and kiss him again. I don't want to stop at all anymore. He returns the kiss with the same enthusiasm and his hands find their way to my waist again to lift me up again. When he crosses the living room with quick steps and lays me down on the sofa, I already feel out of breath and clearly turned on.

His kisses become more intense, his lips move from my mouth to my neck, leaving marks there. But it feels too good to make him stop.

"I will gladly hear your excuses, when someone asks you about your hickeys tomorrow. Because you will be all flustered, when you think again about this moment. Where you are ready to be fucked by your colleague, who you despise so much." I whimper as he pushes up my dress and his hands pull my tights down to my knees. The cold air hits my skin, but I don't really notice it, because his lips are on my neck again and his fingers connect first with my stomach and then further down. I hold my breath as his lips touch my ear and his fingers stroke my folds.

"So wet for me. Didnt think, I would turn you on this much." I kiss him to shut him up.

"You are-" I moan, when he finally puts a finger in me. "-so annoying." He laughs at me.

"Am I? But you seem to like it." I feel myself getting wetter, his fingers feel so good as they move gently but firmly inside me. One of his hands moves to push my dress further up and somehow, he manages to pull it over my head. Now, I'm lying in front of him in just a bra, his hands slowly find their way over my body and to my back, which I lift slightly so that he can open the clasp.

When I lie naked in front of him and he massages my breasts, his lips touch mine and his fingers stimulate me, I feel like I'm in heaven.

He breaks apart, so he can look at me and I draw my eyebrows together, when his fingers increase in speed. My mouth opens and the sounds that escape me echo in the apartment.

"I'm- god, I think I am going to come-" at that he starts to tease me, going slower but a lot deeper. My eyes almost roll back as he hits a certain spot inside me.

"That feels good? What do you say, when you want something?" You stupid idiot.

"You stupid-" I begin to say as his lips graze my nipple and his finger scissor and stretch me out further.

"One word, darling. Say it." And because I feel this knot inside me (and maybe this side of him turns me on, like a lot), I finally open my mouth to please him.

"Please, Mike. I-I need to-" My sentence is cut off as his fingers speed up and I moan loudly.

"Thats a good girl, you can be so good to me, if I make you." His lips search mine as I finally come. My breathing is heavy and when I come down from my high and look at his face, I see the satisfied expression.

"You are done-" I can't maintain my strict facial expression and suddenly have to start smiling. His eyes widen in surprise and I raise my eyebrows, still smiling softly.

"What?" I quietly laugh at his expression.

"Nothing, its just- I have never seen you smiling so happy." I roll my eyes gently. As I look at him closer now, I see the bulge in his pants and the loosened tie. As I lean forward, his eyes shift to my body.

"You still are fully clothed. A bit unfair, don't you think?" I watch him swallow and my hands move to his chest to slowly unbutton his shirt. As I also remove the tie and slip the shirt from his shoulders, I sit myself on his lap. Rocking my hips forward and seeing his eyes close. His hands move to my hips and begin to control the movements, my eyes close too and my head leans into the crook of his neck as the movements become faster.

Sighs and heavy breaths leave his lips and once again, one of his hands moves to grab my breasts, lightly grazing the nipples.

I look at him, noticing his swollen lips and his flushed cheeks. His hair is a mess and his forehead is furrowed, but he tries his best to pull himself together.

I groan as I look at him and suddenly think back to todays afternoon, when he was on a phone call and I heard how he listed one reciting fact after another, without any difficulty.

"What are you thinking about?" His voice pulls me out of my thoughts.

"N-nothing" I'm definitely too embarrassed to admit how much his intelligence and the way he seems to know everything, turns me on.

One of his hands moves to my entrance and teases me by just circling around it. When I try to push myself down, he pulls his fingers away.

"You tell me, whats going on in that pretty head of yours and you'll get me." My body feels so hot, I can't think properly anymore.

"You where on a phone call today and you just- you listed without any effort every single point that will help you win the case. You just said it like- it's nothing."

When his fingers dig into me again, I bite my lips. I try to control my moans and not pay attention to the fact, that I just gave him every opportunity to make him be more complacent than his usual self.

His fingers pump into me and I feel slightly overstimulated. But I wouldnt want to stop now.

"You get off by the thought of me, saying memorized facts? Who would have thought that my intelligence would turn you on so much." God, his ego probably doesn't fit in this apartment anymore.

"Don't think too highly of yourself, you still annoy me." Now I'm really just trying to get myself out of the situation. I lean towards him, so he can't say anything anymore and pull on his blonde hair to distract him.

Moans escape my lips and when I notice that his noises are also getting louder, I pull away from him. He looks at me confused.

"I want you inside me." Thats all I say, but he quickly complies with my request. I slide off his lap and wait for him to take off his pants and boxers until he's finally on top of me again. His fingers find my bottom lip and while maintaining eye contact, I open my mouth so he can insert a finger. My tongue brushes against his and after a few moments of him pressing on my tongue, he lets his fingers move back to the spot that needs him the most.

He stretches me for a few minutes until he finally guides his cock to my hole and slowly penetrates me. My eyes close and I hear his breath in my ear as he pushes further.

"You are so tight- good thing finally someone fucks you." I nod without thinking and hear his laughter in my ear.

"You think so too, huh. Would you let anyone fuck you then?" My stomach tenses, I feel the pleasure growing again and every movement of him. This feels so good-

I try to shake my head, but I'm too lost in the sensations to pay much attention to his words.

"No? But I thought, you hate me. Why would you let me fuck you, if you don´t even like me?" His thrusts become faster and more uncontrolled, I feel him getting closer to his own high.

"I-" I try to stutter "d-don´t hate you." I feel myself getting closer and reach into his hair, pulling at the roots and feeling his lips on my shoulder. His thrusts become more powerful and as he moves his hand and massages my clitoris, suddenly everything goes white in front of my eyes and I come.

I feel every inch inside of me, feel his fingers brush over the visible bulge in my stomach and think to myself: god I feel so full

When he comes too, I moan so loudly that it's impossible that my neighbors didn't hear me. His hand finds its way around my chin, he slides a finger into my mouth and I feel my vagina tighten because of it.

He hisses and his thrusts slow down until he finally pulls out of me, trying not to fall on top of me. As I give him some space next to me, he falls halfway on me, but pulls me on top of him in the next second and I can hear his strong heartbeat. With his outstretched hand he pulls the blanket over me, that had fallen to the floor.

We both try to catch our breath and as the minutes pass, only the wind outside is heard. He is the first to break the silence.

"So, you don't hate me?" I lift my head from his naked chest to look at him.

"Only sometimes." He shakes his head and smiles, gently stroking my back.

The evening went by quickly, we ordered a pizza and ate it (clothed) on the terrace. We were going over his documents for tomorrow, I blushed at the thought that this was the real reason he came here, but he just hugged me from behind after we finished and continued watching the stars.

It's not really clear what this evening means for us, but I don´t want to get into that, not yet. Because I'm not sure what it means anyway.

Because now, I have to get used to the fact that his voice no longer irritates me, that his jokes no longer annoy me and that he as a person, is actually not as bad as I imagined.

"Who thought, I was the one to get you relax."

But he is still a show-off.

#suits tv #mike ross #netflix #tv shows #x reader #fictional characters #smut #enemies to lovers #hate fuck

[meibywabie]

Xie Lian isn’t a hero.

I started with TGCF first when I was introduced to danmei, and I was floored by what I read. It wasn’t just boys kissing in ancient china, it was actually about human tragedy and the selfishness of the omnipotent.

The theme of TGCF doesn’t revolve around XL alone. It’s much bigger than that. This isn’t a ‘TGCF is better’ post, but rather, TGCF is different. And it’s different because Xie Lian isn’t a typical human hero.

XL is not a heroic character like WWX, and he isn’t a sarcastic/comedic relief hero like SQQ. And it isn’t because of their personalities. XL is just as selfless as WWX and just as unreasonably punished as both other MC’s. However, when bad things happen to WWX, you know it’s because of his personality. Because of his kindness, his confidence, his wit. It’s simply BECAUSE it’s WWX as the protagonist.

Same with SVSSS. That story couldn’t have happened without Shen Yuan in SQQ’s body. Like we never would have gotten that level of sarcasm, pity, and empathy. And the novel tells you that repeatedly. Everything that happens in the previous two novels does so because of who the main character is.

But when things happen in TGCF, XL isn’t even the center of the conflict. It’s almost always someone else’s fault, someone else’s business, or someone else’s issue he just happens to be present for. But somehow, it always comes back to him. It’s always his job to resolve things.

Unlike WWX, the conflict isn’t his fault. WWX actively pushes the narrative with his actions. He drives the conflict and later becomes it. Whether he’s at fault or not is the point of his story, but for XL, he’s really just incredibly unlucky. He’s tragic in the sense that he’s just being fucked over by everyone in his life. For what? For being…wonderful!?

I absolutely love that his one little phrase pissed off the evil emperor of heaven. Like his mere existence is a problem.

It’s an incredible piece of writing that the things that get him into trouble are his altruism. Altruism that is fitting for someone who thinks himself a GOD. But also, altruism that many of us mortals share.

Why CANT he save his people if he’s a god? Why CANT he answer everyone’s prayers? Why is he not good enough or strong enough to resolve this conflict if he’s literally a GOD.

XL is constantly facing issues and asking questions that humanity itself has asked.

Why isn’t god answering me, why isn’t god helping me, why do we have a god at all? TGCF has a commentary that doesn’t limit itself to just XL and the type of person he is in the way that MDZS relies on WWX and SVSSS relies on SQQ.

Those novels are how most novels typically function. You choose a specific type of human and see the world through their eyes.

But XL isn’t human. Not in the way he acts nor in the way he tells this story. He tells you everything he witnesses and it barely affects him anymore. He just has some wise thoughts about what everything means.

But TGCF isn’t asking: what would happen if a kind prince ascended to godhood?

Instead—

TGCF begs the question:

What if you told the story of humanity, not through the eyes of a human, but through the eyes of god.

Xie Lian is god.

XL is 800yrs old, has lived through countless tragedies, celebrations, friendships, betrayals, and he ascends. Again.

He’s been stuck with the burden of immortality and now he’s re entering the place that gave him that burden. He walks into heaven to see new gods, but the same old problems. And the whole vibe he has in this is less benevolent and wonderful and more like a fed up mom who’s tired of seeing the girls fighting.

He sits back and watches these issues devolve and shuffles his way into the conflict by accident. Because he’s the only one competent enough to do anything about it.

XL doesnt react like a human being, at the start of the current timeline, he’s a god.

He’s an 800yr old god. He’s seen everything, learned everything.

We see this prince who thinks himself a god then become one. And instead of learning what it means to be a god so he can help the common man— he learns what it means to be a common man so he can become a real god.

XL goes through HELL. He loses countless times, is left, betrayed, ruined, trampled, destroyed. He is constantly being thwarted by not just people but the very gods he worshipped and the god he himself became. But again— XL isn’t even that big of a personality for us to cling to that alone and see how these things happened to him??

He isn’t boasting about how great he is out of pride and ego, he isn’t rampaging or going mad with power, he isn’t a huge character. But his lack of those qualities is what triggers Jun Wu to ruin him. He wants to see him go crazy, wants to see him struggle. Wants to see his ego and pride. And he’s not the only one!!!

Mu Qing is also incredibly jealous, so are the other gods!!! And Qi Rong, his own family!!! His parents even get upset with him for not doing enough. Everyone saw this kid blessed with so much and started wishing for him to break. And they succeed. He goes insane, he starts killing, he starts wanting to die, he starts losing faith.

But MAN it is just so gorgeous to me that this character is almost…forced to be a main character? Forced to suffer, forced to make mistakes, forced to be a problem. He is so powerful and smart and incredible and then he is made to believe he is nothing. Here is this god who has been forced to feel HUMAN.

And once he finally feels that way, once he finally falls to the ground and loses everything, someone comes by and offers his hat.

And that’s all it takes for a man to truly become a god.

TGCF asks what if you told a story through the eyes of god? It shows you this guy sighing through drama and fixing peoples problems.

And then it goes back and tells you: What makes a man, god?

And we read all of XL’s history. His victories and failures. And it perfectly describes how he’s ascended again. Not out of heroics this time. But out of his pure humanity.

God is a kind, gentle, but confident man who wanders around helping who he can and opening his doors to those who wish to come in. He resolves the conflicts he’s there for, and takes note of those he wasn’t there for. He trudges along holding no grudges and sighing when people make mistakes. He loves selflessly and holds no judgment. He feels strange letting people take care of him but he will take care of you. When he can, and when he has the chance, he will take care of you.

XL is almost born with every book definition of what a god is: kind, selfless, strong, and true. But his story forces him to learn how to be human instead. To fail, die, love, kill and suffer. And when that god was beaten and broken, he was saved by one thing. A human.

That’s how you become a god. And that’s what it means to be one. To be human. To be a good person.

XL couldn’t have been a WWX. He couldn’t have been a staple protagonist with a heart of gold, wit and passion. He couldn’t have had a story with everyone’s conflict directly tied to him and because of him. That isn’t what TGCF is for.

It isn’t about XL himself. It’s about god. It explores the selfishness that comes with immortality, and the selflessness that comes with mortality.

There are other aspects that make it a nice protag story. He falls in love, he’s kinda air headed and sassy. He did have the character and maturity to choose to become a wonderful godlike person but that’s a post for another day. But honestly, if this were a regular novel, it probably would’ve been about Hua Cheng. He lives for love and passion and devotion. He kills and saves and sacrifices, he denies godhood and wins the girl in the end. Now THATS a hero.

But XL isn’t a hero. He’s a god.

MXTX wrote a story that wasn’t about a sheepish prince who lost it all, but instead wrote a story about gods and humans. She wrote what reads like a Greek epic to me. With such hard comments on morality and cruelty. She really hit me with everything I love about literature. And yes I do love MDZS and SVSS but TGCF is different.

Like guoshi said: the gods are human, after all. But XL above them all, is most definitely a god.

#im honestly pretty sure if Jun Wu hadn’t ruined XL’s life he woudlve become like LQQ and been a little stupid LMAO #Jun Wu could never #TGCF #heaven official's blessing #heaven officials blessing #hob #hualian #xie lian

[todayispeia]

✩°｡‘ A POE CUP TO REMEMBER

xavier thorpe x fem!reader

words: 3k

genre: smut, slowburn romance (kinda), flirting, teasing, fingering

a/n: im not great at creating a fanfic, so expect grammatical errors and typo’s ahead !! i hope you enjoy this ♡

you were the new student at nevermore. you were assigned to be roommate with the girl named enid. she was practically a werefolf and a all-rounder gossip girl at the school. she tour you to the hallway where all the students gather there, there was a werewolves, sirens, and many more. “oh, and that girl bianca, he dated our tortured artist, xavier thorpe” she said, pointing the guy who was painting at the wall. he looked at you and not a minute he continues to focus at his drawing.

after the tour, you relaxed a while at your dorm. it was raining outside, “enid, i’m just gonna go downstairs, just catching some raindrops” you said. enid just nodded and continue to dance all by herself. while walking outside, you saw the statue falling above you, but someone pushes you away from it. causing yourself to be unconscious.

after the incident where the statue almost hit you on the head, luckily a student saved your life.

you wake up at the room, seeing a guy beside you, he was already standing, perhaps waiting for you to open your eyes. you immediately get up causing him to sit quickly. “nurse said you dont have a concussion, anyway, im glad you’re awake” he muttered. ”its because im not, and will never be. and the last thing i remember is i was walking alone 'til i saw a statue falling to me.” you said while looking at him. “and, how did you even get there that fast? i believe there was no one when i walked there, i was alone” you added, it was a mixture of confusion and embarrassment. he clicks his tongue before replying to your statement, “call it instinct” he said. “instinct, huh? well, dont expect me to gave you a gratitude or something. its quite unreal to myself giving someone like that” you said while fixing your posture to face him. “mm-hmm. you know, most people just say thank you” he said, looking at you. “i didn't even requested to be rescued that time” — “and you thought i should have just let that thing smash you to mush?” he replied. “i mean, i could have just save myself” you said while crossing your arms. “too much independent would cause you trouble” he scoffs, you couldn't help but to laugh at what he just said. “id rather have a lots of independent, if i will be honest.” you said, “i know you aren't asking my name, but, im xavier thorpe. you’re the new student here, right? the last time we met, i was about two feet shorter, and 40 pounds heavier” he said, “ah, yes. i do remember you, the guy who was painting earlier on the walls. im y/n ” you muttered. “y/n, sounds good” he said. “i believe i can go now, yes? well, see you around, xavier.” you said, getting up to exit the room. “yeah, see you too” he said looking at you.

a few werewolves were howling at the night. you and enid went to the window to check out. “if you really are a werewolf, why aren't you howling like them?” you asked, its quite different to encounter a werewolf not howling when its full moon. “i cant. my mom says some wolves are late bloomers, but i have been to the best lycanologist” she muttered, she only had a claw, which is awesome because of how she painted it with vivid colors. “i had to fly to milwaukee, would you believe it?” she said, toning disgusted at herself. “what happened next?” you asked, you were interested at it because of how different she was than other wolves here in nevermore. “i would be a lone wolf” she muttered, looking down. “thats quite sorrowful to know about you, what would happen if ever you didn’t wolf out yet?” you said, while you continue to asked her about her condition. “i uh... i’d be kicked out of my family pack with no prospect of finding a mate” she said, the tone was a bit aching to feel. its like a mixture of disappointed and rage of anger. “you’ll wolf out, someday. i can feel it” you said, cheering her up. “thanks, y/n. i do hope so”

the school announce that nevermore will be attending to a harvest festival this night. “hey, are you excited for this event?” enid asked, smiling at you. “yeah, well i guess. i’ll just play some games there basically” you said, smiling a little. “thats great, well, this event me and ajax will meet there too. im so excited!” she said. after arriving at the event, enid and you decided to split up there since she said she was gonna meet ajax, her crush basically. you walked around and play darts, it was a basic one, obviously. while playing, xavier went to you, “jeez, didnt know you get any better at this, i bet you can catch the big one toy here” he said already looking to you. “im good at any games, i have played this since i was seven” you muttered, the balloons went popping and popping 'til you win. “quite a good shot” he compliment, “why dont you go search for your hobbies rather than talking to me” you muttered, looking at him to see that he was smiling. “all right, well then, i’ll play these darts too” he said while keeping his smile there. he was quite great at shooting the darts in the balloon too, there was an emotion that pops up to you out of nowhere. it was a feeling that you had a long time ago, but you couldn't understand what that is, so you shrugged it away. “hey, is your mind full of thoughts?” xavier said, tapping your shoulders. you look at him with a wide eyes, you were spaced out because of the thoughts. you look at him holding a cute bear beside him, seem’s that he win the game too.

“everyone, the principal said we should go watch the fireworks!” a student shouted at the crowds. “we should get going now, y/n” xavier said, pulling you out of the crowds to watch the fireworks. you didn't respond but just nodded at him. the fireworks were amazing, different colors, both of you were smiling each other. “seems that you had a great smile hiding there” he said, smiling at you. you couldn't help but giggled at what he said. it feel like a spark was creating that day, you thought to yourself. “hey y/n? i have something to ask” he muttered, turning around to face you. “spit it out” you said, looking at him. “are you going to the poe cup competition?” he asked, smiling. it looks like he was expecting you to see there. “oh, well, i think i would join too. and i’ll go at enid’s team, if ever she would join too” you said.

and so, the poe cup competition begins. you saw enid and the other students designing the boat. it was black and the design was like a cat figure. you went to look it more closer, enid notice you and wave. “so, you’re going to the poe cup competition?” she asked, smiling as always. “yeah, and i decided that i wanted to be part of your team, if thats what it calls” you muttered. “great! because our team will be having a cute black cat outfit this upcoming event! im sure you’ll love it” she said. “hm, maybe i will. i would check it out if there’s a costume published now” you replied. while enid was helping the others with the boat, you walked away silently and moved somewhere. while looking at the areas, you saw xavier at the archery. he was quite bad at it. you moved closer to have conversations with him, even in a small amount of time. “bad shot, i think you need a mentor for that” you said, crossing your arms. he looked at you with disbelief, “didnt see you coming, are you interested in archery or you’re here to entertain me instead?” he said, smirking while he tried for the second time. “actually, i was just lurking around here, until i saw you” you replied. you started to pick up the bow and a arrow to tried it out. “have you ever tried to handle a bow and shoot an arrow?” he asked. “we’ll see what i can do” you said, you prepared your bow and arrow to shoot it in the red spot. the luck was on your side, the sharp of the arrow went thru to the red spot. while xavier, he was quite impressed at what you did. “impressive, i already think to your statement earlier that you should be my mentor instead” he said, smirking at you. “dont gave me that look, it’s intriguing” you said. “well, see you in the competition, i bet you’ll look nice” you said and swiftly walked away. “is that a flirt or a compliment?” he shoutedly asked to you.

it is now class time and you walked over to the following schedule. you saw bianca and the other sirens looking at you. “there’s an open spot next to me” xavier spoked, you walked beside him and sit. looks like he was sketching something, more like a spider. he moves his hand only to make the sketch of his to move in reality. you can say that it was quite impressive that a sketchy spider can be alive in just by his hands. “admit it, you’re a little impressed” he muttered, looking at you with a smile. “hate to admit that you’re right, i was impressed in that magical hands of yours” — “wanna know what this magical hands can do?” xavier said, you looked at him with a disgust, but your insides says otherwise.

it is now the competition for the poe cup, enid’s team was labeled as black cats, its quite attractive. “hey, y/n! your costume is at the tent! you can wear it now” she said, smiling at you. “oh, thats great news. i’ll go wear it now.” you muttered, the outfit was fitted, and the ears fitted well to you. “OMG, you look purr-fect!” enid said, she walked back to help the others with the whiskers. while xavier walked towards you, “didnt know you’ll look good in black, y/n” he said, looking up and down at you. “you look like a serial killer clown at that costume of yours, thats more than a word attractive to me” you replied, smirking at him. “i considered that as a flirt, i’ll get back that” he said while smiling, he went on to his team and sat on the boat. it was now all settled, everyone was on the boat now. while you were focusing, you notice xavier was looking at you, you went to look at him but he looked to another direction. “i want to wrlcome you all to the edgar allan poe cup!” — “this is one of nevermore’s proudest annual traditions, dating back 125 years. each team must row across to raven island, pull a flag from crackstone’s crypt, and hustle back without sinking or being sunk. first team to cross the finish line with their flag wins the cup and bragging rights for a year, as well ss some special privileges. ”

“let the poe cup begin!” a sound of shotgun bang to the air and all teams swiftly sweep in the lake. one of the teams were suddenly drag on the side of the lake, causing them to bump into the giant figure and sunk. you immediately figured out that someone was trying to ruin the teams, so you immediately made up a plan. you remembered before the competition that you requested enid to put some traps or any thing that can capture in the lake. and this was the great time, you click the button and immediately figured it out that there was a mermaid nearby your boat that was about to sabotage. luckily it was now wrapped by a fishnet and no longer can bother your team. as your boat hit the next task, “stay here and make sure the other teams can't sabotage our boat. im gonna get the flag and perhaps, distract some jokers” you said to enid, you quickly run to the woods to find the crackstone’s crypt, you saw xavier there so you quickly hide from a tree to sabotage him. when you saw xavier is now nearby to you, you rush to pull him somewhere. “hey! we still have a competition, what were you thinking?” he asked, you quickly covered his mouth as you both made your way to the crackstone’s crypt where your flag was. “shush your mouth or my mouth will do it for you” you said while you picked up your team’s flag. “as if your mouth can make me shut up, prove it then” he said pulling you closer to him, you were furious because of what he said, the tone was underestimating you. you pull him closer to gave him a peck of kiss, and run away from him. he was about to gave it all but all he gotten was frustration from you for teasing, as you now go back to your teams, xavier also came back as well. while your team is at the lake coming back for the finish line, the mermaid was back again at the lake, trying to destroy your team’s boat, but you didn’t want to disappoint your friend neither anyone. so, you decide to swim over down to pull the mermaid back on what he needs to be. you pull his tail down to the lake and luckily, he swim away. you went back to the boat because of the water suffocating your lungs. your team fastly sweep the lake back to the nevermore, you and the team also sabotage the bees boat to slow them down. luckily, your team won after the competition. a lots of students was shocked after the competition, because all they knew is that bianca, herself, will always win. not until you were now part of the nevermore.

not until xavier pulled you to his dorm. you knew you’re fucked up.

“oh, so you’re into teasing, isn’t? teasing me in the middle of competition, you planned this, didn’t you y/n?” he asked, he was now pinning you against the wall, letting out his anger and frustrations at you. “would you be done if i said yes? or what? you’re gonna do something to me, you little fratboy” you muttered, you moved away yet his hands grab you and push you to bed. “oh yeah? actually, i have something to confess before i start something fun” he said while looking up and down to you with a smirk. “spit it out xavier, i dont wanna wait” you stated, “you know, ever since the harvest festival, i already have feelings for you. and i cant get you off my mind, and in the meantime, i’ve always wanted to have intimate with you, hopelessly devoted to get you” he said, you were shocked after what he just said. you didn’t know what to feel, the heat was getting higher and higher, it was so intense. all this time trying to shrug your feelings towards him, he finally cleared it out. you couldn’t express it properly so you pulled him to a kiss, he kissed back to you that is no eager, so needy. it looks like he have been waiting patiently for this to happened. his tongue swiftly made his way to your mouth, causing you to moan in the kiss, his hands went thru your boobs to massage it softly, your back arch because of it. both of you cut the kiss to breath first. “your outfit looks good, but you’ll look good without them, love” he said, pulling off your costume. “i didnt know jokers were into rough sex, quite fascinating to discover” you muttered, taking off his hat and running your fingers to her hair. “oh dont worry, my magical hands can do so much in you, also my mouth. just watch” he muttered, after he successfully took off your costume, you also pulled his clothes off and throw it somewhere in the room.

“lay down” he demanded, you did what he told to avoid more argues. “well look at that, such a beautiful sight for my eyes. its more than what i sketch about this” he muttered, he leans closer to your core and gives it a lick. you muffled at his action, “dont f-fucking tease xavier, please” you begged, he looked at you with a smirk in his face. “that’s a revenge for making me hard on the competition, beg more, love, maybe i can give what we both needed” he suggested, rubbing circles in your pussy. “p-please, xavier... i-i didn’t really meant to tease you that time, i j-just really want to feel your lips. please, xavier” you explained, arching your back to give signals to him to continue. “i’ll believe for now” he said, as he positioned himself at your core to have a taste. he leans closer and licks it. you moaned his name causing him to continue to eat you out. he puts kisses and licks at your pussy, even biting it, causing you to moaned loudly and continuously arch your back several times. but xavier wasn’t satisfied with, he push a finger inside of you while he continues to eat you out. you pulled his hair while continuously moaning his name. “fuck, your mouth is really good, p-please continue, im close” you said while rolling your eyes because of the pleasure. xavier nodded and pushes one more finger inside you and started to push in and out with a more pace of speed. while his mouth is busy tasting you more and more. “a-ah! im coming!” you shouted, “come on me love” in the exact time he said that, you come in his mouth. he took off his fingers and licks it, tasting you. “you taste delicious than my daily meal” he muttered, leaning you for a kiss, the kiss was passionate. you kissed back and wrapped your arms around his neck. “i’ll help you clean up, and overall, what happened between us is amazing. and i want to ask you out for a date after?” he said, “of course, and, we’re gonna be lovers after all” you replied.

#wednesday #wednesday netflix #xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe fanfic #xavier thorpe smut #xavier thorpe x reader #xavier thorpe x reader smut #slow burn #xavier thorpe is hot #netflix

[butmakeitgayblog]

how do you think clarke would have let lexa know she still had feels for her and loved her if they hadn't had to separte, they had more time together. im really curious was it sometime during the night clarke lays awake and cant shake the feeling she just needs lexa, like really needs her affection rite down to the core or would it be clarke just randomly kissing lexa because shes being all heda and she just cant help herself. i mean come on we all know lexas not going in for the kiss first this time she said she wouldnt and she all afraid of clarkes boundries now.

Ya know. That's actually a good question. And I think if you asked a dozen people in the fandom you'd probably get a dozen really different answers, but I think in my mind and just how Clarke conducted herself, I don't think she would've gone for it any time soon without there being a tipping point.

Because the thing is, Clarke is stubborn. She is bull-fuckin-headed. God love her, she's a precious little shit. Ya just wanna firmly sandwich her face between your palms be like, ".... let some shit go sometimes. Also, you're allowed to want things for yourself. Now stop bein' a dick."

So with that understanding - that she is stubborn and will hold a grudge wuh-haaay past when it's time to let it go - I have to say that no I don't see her really being completely and openly honest with Lexa about her feelings until given a clear impetus to be so. There always had to be a push for it to happen.

Having to go back to Arkadia and possibly never seeing Lexa again, seeing Lexa so resigned to the fact that they may never again get to have that kind of closeness or intimacy in their goodbye (as fleeting in that moment as it felt), knowing that they may never see each other again or if they do it could potentially be on opposite sides of the battlefield, the fact that it was Lexa who pushed forward and let slip "That's why I—..."

Those were all a storm of emotions that emotionally pushed Clarke into acting on her feelings.

Without that, I don't think she would've done it any time soon.

Because it was obvious Lexa had already done damn near all she could to earn Clarke's trust back. Clarke even understood the choices Lexa had made by that point. Had literally mirrors them herself despite, stubbornly 👀, trying to push the blame off onto Lexa's shoulders as a coping mechanism. They were rebuilding all the pieces of their relationship, but every 2 steps forward, Clarke would always take one step back. She always kept that distance. Always keep Lexa at arms distance.

This scene right here is the epitome of Clarke being Clarke

I mean goddamn girl. They had just spent the afternoon together. Clarke had sat and physically comforted Lexa after her nightmare. She'd drawn her sleeping and held that trust in such a vulnerable state. And yet, when Emerson attacked and Lexa moved to not only protect her but to comfort her by merely touching her and helping her up, Clarke recoils and harshly rejects her. Leaving Lexa startled, and confused, and hurt despite her immediately accepting the rejection, because... well, look at what they had just shared. That afternoon, those moments, they had meant something.

But that's just what Clarke does.

It's just who she is when she feels like her trust has been broken. Despite all the pieces being there for Clarke to move on from the anger she was already having a hard time hanging on to anyway, she still did hang on to it, because she's a stubborn little asshole (affectionate... mostly) in that way

That being said... if they were given A Lot more time for Clarke to pull her head out of her own ass and move on and actually allow herself to be happy within this world of chaos, I think it would've been more of a moment of Lexa just being Lexa, rather than Heda, that would've finally knocked down those few remaining bricks in Clarke's wall.

Because, while I think Clarke was attracted to Heda and Lexa as Heda and all that she embodied in those moments, truly I think Clarke fell in love with Lexa as just a person. The girl beneath the armor. And, imo at least, I think that's an important distinction to make. And I think it was an important distinction for Clarke too.

So do I think it would've been some moment of Lexa being entirely ~too Heda~ and Clarke just smooching her face off? Honestly, no. While that would've made for a fantastic moment to watch 🥵, I actually think it would've been a quiet moment of Lexa just being Lexa. Her saying or doing something with more meaning or emotion or vulnerability than she normally does. A moment of her showing Clarke yet another piece of that girl hidden beneath the sash of her duty that just hit her like an arrow right between the cracks of Clarke's already crumbling resolve.

But either way, emotional or situational, there'd always have to be a tipping point.

#anon #clexa #that moment when clarke yanks away from her and Lexa looks so startled and deflates a little #fucking destroys me every time #i just want to hug her and tell her it'll be ok #maybe give her little sweet treat or something idk

[unlimitedhearts]

I’m dreading the third game of Spiderman might kill off Harry :/ either he’s goblin (solo or probably along with daddy-o) and dies a la Hero Sacrifice. Or kept comatose and in the end with grim results the decision is to pull the plug on him. idk I feel Harry’s fate is doom and gloom. But they could have killed Harry at the end of this sequel giving a strong motivation for Norman to be the Goblin and hatred for Spider-Man…yet they didn’t. idk rambling thoughts. What do you think?

Personally i can see both options. I saw someone in the tags of my last headcanon post say that it wouldnt make sense to save him from death in this game only to kill him in the next. On some level i get that, why wait when you could do it now?

I have two worst case scenarios in my head:

Harry wakes up from his coma w amnesia a la the third Tobey Maguire movie. Hes unaware of Pete being Spider-Man and Peter, thinking hes protecting Harry, wont tell him. This may cause a rift in their friendship when Harry finds out - or if Norman ends up going goblin and dies - Spider-Man is to blame in Harrys eyes and he'll go after him then. To me this is a tired trope of Harry getting an intense hatred for Spidey and wanting to kill him over his father. It always felt out of character for me and i truly TRULY hope they dont go this route.

Harry becomes the Kobold. In the comics, Kobold is essentially Harrys way of making the Green Goblin a good guy. If he still wants to fight by Peters side, he'll find a way to do it. Kobold would make a lot of sense to me personally, as it kind of continues their dynamic from this game. Then at the end theres a heros sacrifice to be made and Harry goes for it despite Peters protests. This would be lazy to me too though because he essential already did the heros sacrifice in this game. Seems like theyd just want us to have more time with him to love him even more, just to make losing him hurt worse. I wouldn't put it past an intrepid writer to think they could make it work, but it just seems lazy to me.

Actual best case scenario for me though? Harry wakes up as the g-serum is being injected. Hes against being his dads experiment all over again so he runs and finds Peter. Hes not aware of his pseudo-retirement, he just goes straight to the place thats always been his safe haven; Peters home. He asks Peter to hide him from his dad. Tries to explain everything but hes exhausted and frantic. Peter agrees and they take him into hiding.

Norman, ever the expert deflector, doesnt see this as a failing on his part. Hes convinced spider-man had something to do with his son escaping so he puts out a hit on him. Hes ready, willing, and able to capture and kill at least one of the two spider-men it doesnt matter. We see him pardon Wilson Fisk for this job, and when Fisk cant do it, he has to. Normans going to go Goblin. I know it, i can feel it in my bones.

Miles asks Peter to get back in action and he does. Fisk, plus potentially Otto again, plus this brand new villain in town is too much for any one person to handle. Heres where i see Harry becoming a "Guy In The Chair" for Peter like Ganke is for Miles. Two Guys in the Chair helping the spider-men is definitely better than one. I could also see Harrys goblin powers start to emerge but he keeps pushing them down. Last time he gave into power it didnt end well for anyone.

In an effort to not write out the entire plot of the game as i see fit (because itd be long and there are so many moving pieces and characters and IDEK WHERE THEYRE GONNA PUT SILK IN-), i think if Harry does take on the cowl he'll be doing so against his father. I think i see Harry becoming Goblin/Kobold to fight against Norman and ultimately try to help Peter/Miles. This is where i see Harry either accidentally killing Norman or Norman killing his son (and of course, blaming Spider-Man)

There is also room, in my mind, to bring back Venom a la Lethal Protector/Agent Venom. But tbh if they do, i would much rather Venom go to Eddie Brock or Flash Thompson. But thats just the separate Venom Fangirl Entity within me.

Ultimately my hope of course is that Harry not die and they dont go down that all too tired and hackneyed trope of Harry growing to hate Peter dor whatever reason. I truly TRULY hope they dont go that route it is just SO tired and lazy. I want them to stay close and loving. Whatever route they go with will be SO MUCH MORE IMPACTFUL if Harry Osborn lives and doesnt make a full 180 on his best friend for no good reason.

#harry osborn #peter parker #parksborn #if you squint #spider-man #marvel's spider man 2 #spider-man 2 #insomniac spider man #insomniac spider-man #insomniac games #spider man imagine #spider-man headcanons #honestly insomniac pls hire me #i would be so good at writing this game i care about these characters SO DEEPLY. #what do i need to do for you to notice me insomniac senpai #venetiangoldroz

[daydream-cement]

Idea for your Larissa x fern fanfic whether is be a one shot or not.

I feel like Larissa would try something new like giving fern a lap dance. Strip show and fern is desperate to have permission to touch her.

I hope this is ok. I just saw the idea and thought it worked well for them.

Strip It Down (NSFW)

Larissa Weems x OC (Fern Rogers)

You furrow your brow at Larissa's question before repeating it back to her, "Can you strip for me?"

You had been reading a book by the fireplace in Larissa's office when she approached you from behind, beginning to massage your shoulders. The way she had asked you made it seem like she was almost embarrassed to ask. You mark your page and fold the book into your lap, turning around to look up at her.

Larissa bit the inside of her lip and nodded, seemly excited to try something new with you. How could you say no to your wife?

"I would love to have you strip for me..." You can feel a bit of confidence surging in your chest, loving the idea that Larissa wanted to put on a little show just for you.

Your eyes follow her as she circles your chair, leaning down to rest her hands on either side of you, "Now, no touching..."

You nod in compliance, setting your book off to the side to begin watching her move before you. You wonder if Larissa had been planning this for today. She wore a button up blouse rather than one of her usual dresses.

A satisfied smile graced your lips as you watched her head roll backwards. Her fingers gracefully undid button after button, pausing to slowly gyrate her hips before you. As she did your eyes, flicked downward, enjoying the methodical roll of her hips. God, she wasn't even undressed yet and you were ravenous for a taste of her.

Larissa's tongue darts from her lips as she notices you watching her hips hungrily. Abandoning her task of unbuttoning her shirt, she takes a step closer, putting her within an arms length. A hand finds her zipper to her skirt and she pushes the fabric from her body, exposing the hips and thighs you love so much.

You regret not sitting on your hands when she turns away from you and seats herself in your lap. She begins grinding her ass against you her hands moving back up to her blouse to finish off the buttons. Your hands had come to grip the edges of your chair, trying to distract yourself. You wanted to touch and taste that beautiful, soft skin.

She leans back into your body, presenting her shoulders to you. You let out a exasperated groan when you remember that you cant touch or kiss her. At first, this experience made you feel like you were the one in control, but quickly you were realizing that Larissa was the one in control all along.

Larissa rises up out of your lap, shrugging the blouse to the floor, leaving herself in matching lingerie... She had been planning this.

Turning around to face you once more, her hips moved methodically, drawing your eyes back to the part of her body that always made you weak. You were entranced by her body. The fire light danced across her skin and it made you wonder how much longer you could survive without touching her.

Larissa moved to all fours, crawling closer and closer. She was on her knees before you, her hands sliding up your thighs as she rose higher and higher. Her face mere centimeters from yours when she finally whispered those words you had been longing to hear, "Touch me..."

Once she finally offered you permission to touch her, your hands went into action. You took her face in your hands, pulling yourself to her to finally press a kiss to those lovely lips. You push your body weight against her, urging her to slowly lay back on the rug that lay in front of the fireplace.

There you made love before the fireplace. Every motion thoughtful. Every kiss tender.

And, as always when you tried something new with Larissa in the bedroom, you couldn't help wondering to yourself, 'Why hadn't we tried this sooner?'

#larissa weems smut #larissa weems x oc #larissa weems #principal larissa weems #principal weems #wednesday netflix #fanfic #fern rogers #ferissa #oneshot #stately sequoia #the cedars have eyes #violet and rose #smut

[strrwbrrryjam]

i know we all have our own personal interpretations of how dutch + hosea met arthur, but my personal interpretation of how they met was that dutch + hosea were in a bar, high of a job well done and arthur was in the bar at the back, somewhere hidden scouting out the bar, because, yknow, drunken adults are the easiest to steal from, and he sees dutch + hosea at the bar, oddly proud of themselves, too wrapped up with their successful job well done and each others company that they dont notice 14 year old arthur getting up behind them and yanking their winnings and dashing straight out of the door

they dont notice immediately, but it doesnt take them long too, whether the barkeep is the one to inform them that they were just robbed or they soon look at their winnings and realise that its gone, or they hear the doors to the bar open and close widly like someone has just pushed them too quick and the hinges are barely staying on,

anyway, they notice arthur threw the window of the bar, walking away, trying to look as inconspicuous as possible and they decide to split up, hosea goes through the back, and dutch wanders out through the front and follows him from a distance

arthur panics, noticing dutch following him and ends up walking into a dead end, the door doesnt open, hes trapped, hes panicking, thinking that the man thats following him, thats trapping him and blocking his escape is going to be his end all

all the while, dutch is calmly telling the boy whose looking at him like hes the incarnate of death itself, to just give him the bag and no one gets hurt

but arthur isnt listening, panic is making him deaf to the words that are being said to him, so he just throws the bag to the side, and pulls out a gun, listening to lyles advice, something that makes him so sick to, but he doesnt have anything else to do, in arthurs mind, its him or the man infront of him, and he'd rather it not be him

the gun is a broken little thing, its dirty and doesnt have any bullets in it, but he'd be damned if he dies here

dutch cant help but be a little impressed, he admires this kids fighting spirit, his stubbornness, his bravery, he holds out his hands to calm the kid, his voice soothing in his regular old dutch charm, but it just works to make him more agitated,

hosea busts through the locked door, distracting arthur into dropping the gun and things work in quick succession

hosea notices the gun, grabs a hold of arthur and holds him to the ground, restraining him to the ground while dutch tells him to get off him, he was handling it

they argue above him, all the while arthurs panicking, hes tearing up, and he hates it, he hates it so much, he can hear lyles voice mocking him as he struggles and fights against hoseas grip unaware to the fact that dutch is thinking of taking arthur with him

hosea sighs, disappointed and not approving of dutch's plan, thinking he's lost his mind

he looses his grip, pulls arthur up and begins to lead him out of the alleyway, guiding him forcefully out of the alleyway by the shoulder to the hotel,

while dutch picks up the bag and follows after him, chuffed and thinking of the plans for their newest gang member

arriving at the hotel, they order a bath and three meals for the boy and them

they offer him the bath and a free meal and only if arthur would like to, he can join them to listen to their offer

arthurs bathes for the first time in years, he puts on his old clothes back on, and he eats the meal, hes full and clean and... hes curious

he wonders why they fed him, why they bought him the bath, wonders why they didnt kill him and against his better judgement, he wants to know what their deal is

so he joins them to listen to the offer, and the rest, well the rest is history

#rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 arthur morgan #arthur morgan #rdr2 hosea matthews #hosea matthews #rdr2 dutch van der linde #dutch van der linde #strawberry speaks

[holymolymacaroni]

“If I could love you I would” Damon Salvatore x reader

Tags: Angst, love, heartbroken reader, sadness, eventual makeup, reader is Elena’s older sister

“This is why I can’t be with you anymore, Y/N as much as I love you you will never be Elena to me, and I’ll only hurt you worse the more I stick around and pretend that you could take away all of those feelings I’ve felt. It does neither of us any good. I’m sorry I really am but I can’t hurt you anymore” Damon spoke as he dropped you off at your house as a sad look was framed on his face. "So....your choosing her, my own sister who's made it clear that she doesn't love you over me? Instead of the person who has only ever showed you love, kindness and happiness....t-this is it? Just like that?" You cried as tears couldn't stop forming around your eyes as you poured out your feelings "w-why can't I be good enough?" You asked as Damon frowned and looked away

“You are more than good enough Y/N, it’s just not that simple” he replied as he took a step closer to you, his eyes meeting yours “I know you understand why I can’t be with you anymore, you’re not stupid. It’s not that you’re not enough, it’s that you’re too much for me to handle right now. I need someone who can understand the person I am and the things I have to do, and you can’t do that. You’re too innocent, too pure. You deserve someone who can give you the life you want, and I can’t do that for you” he explained softly, his voice laced with regret "But I want you. More than anything else in this world. And that's the problem. I don't want to hurt you, but I can't stop myself from doing just that. It's not fair to you, or to me. We both deserve better than this." He took another step closer, his hand reaching out to brush a stray tear from your cheek. "I'm sorry, Y/N. I really am”

As he touched your cheek you couldn’t help but push his hand away from your face as anger and sadness clouded your judgment "Too innocent? Too pure? That's not what you were saying when you had me laying in your bed as you took my virginity Damon. I know more then you think I do but I know for a fact Elena will break your heart again and you know it.....why can't you just pick me Damon? Why are you and Stefan always fighting over Elena!? WHY CANT YOU FIGHT FOR ME FIGHT FOR THE LOVE I KNOW YOU FEEL FOR ME!?!" You yelled angrily as tears kept falling.

“Y/N, you’re right. I’m not perfect. And I did take your virginity because I wanted to, because you’re beautiful and amazing and I couldn’t resist. But that doesn’t change the fact that I can’t be with you. Not the way you deserve to be. I’m sorry, but it’s the truth. As for me and Stefan fighting over Elena, we do it because she’s the one who makes us feel alive again, who brings out the best and worst in us. She’s like a drug to us, and we can’t help ourselves. And as for fighting for you, I am fighting for you, in my own way. I’m trying to let you go so you can find someone who can give you what you want, someone who can make you happy, someone who won’t hurt you. I don’t want to be that person anymore. I can’t. I’m sorry” he said, his voice full of emotion as he took another step closer to me. "I know this hurts. But it's for the best. You deserve better than someone like me. Someone who isn’t me” he removed his hand from your face as he stepped back “I don’t expect you to understand darling, but you need too.”

“You don't know what I deserve Damon....everything you've told me about loving me and wanting to be with me until my dying breath was a lie... and it's all for Elena.....everything is always about Elena......everyone loves Elena....you, Stefan, Matt, EVERYONE!!!! What about m-me? What about me wanting love? What about me wanting you Damon? I can't just forget like you want me too....I-I love you Damon Salvatore I have since the first day I met you.....and I refuse to believe that you never loved me back.....but choose Elena I should have expected as such from you, your so far up her ass that you push anyway else away that could possibly love and care for you and it's all because you wanted what your brother had first....it's not that you love her it's you wanting to rip away Stefan's heart through her.” You spat angrily at him

He knew he shouldn't have said those things to her, he knew it would only make things worse. But he couldn't help himself. The pain in your eyes was killing him, and the thought of you loving him like that, it was too much to bear.

"Darling, you're right. I never should have said those things. I was angry and hurt, and I took it out on you. But that doesn't change the fact that I can't be with you. Not like this. I love you, Y/N. More than you'll ever know. But I can't risk hurting you again. I can't." He took a deep breath, trying to steady his voice. "I'm sorry. I should have just walked away from you, left you alone. But I couldn't do that. You're too important to me, and I don't want to lose you." He reached out then, his hand cupping your cheek gently, his thumb brushing away a stray tear. "I'm sorry. So very sorry. But I can't change who I am, or what I feel for Elena.” He spoke softly as the sadness that you felt coursed through him now.

“Just stop Damon, Just stop it okay I understand I'll never be good enough like Elena, I understand that you only used me as a distraction from her, I understand that no matter what I say or do you'll never choose me. I understand that Elena will always be the one I understand that you would do absolutely anything for her even if it meant losing your own life....I-I understand Damon but I wanted to be that person for you....I tried so hard to change myself to make you love me to make you want to pick me but I'll never be better then a second little measly option for anyone....it's all I ever am to you, to Stefan, to Matt to....to everyone okay. You just put it in big bold bright letters for me that I will NEVER be good enough....and for that Damon I'm sorry. My entire life everyone around me has always chosen Elena over me, of course they would she's the better, attractive, athletic sister and all I ever will be is the older sister who hides out in her room reading fantasy and romance novels wishing and hoping someone would finally see me....and I thought that was you Damon, but once again I'm clearly wrong.... once again Y/N another pat on your back for letting someone actually in thinking they could never hurt you.....” you spoke as you looked at Damon “I just wished you would I have told me this before I allowed myself to be attached to you over and over again” you spoke sadly as your heart finally broke all of your feelings poured from you.

“If I could love you I would” he sighed “I would do anything to be the person you deserve but I’m not. You have to face it Y/N as long as I’m around you, you’ll only get hurt” he spoke with a heavy heart, he turned and walked back to his car, his mind filled with images of your beautiful face, your smile, your tears. He knew he’d never forget you, never stop loving you. But he also knew that he couldn't be with you, not in the way you deserved. And so, he drove away, leaving behind the girl who had captured his heart, and the endless cycle of pain and regret that came with it. He felt a pain in his chest that was almost physical. He loved you, more than he ever thought possible. And yet, here he was, letting you go. It wasn't fair to you. But he knew it was the only way. He couldn't keep hurting you like this.

#damon salvarote #the vampire diaries #damon x reader #angst #love #Spotify

[yaraneechan]

some Aliens arc tome meta (+ talking about animation and directing)

Tome has two fears:

1)That shes dragging everyone along and bothering them. They're pretending to want to help her and are tired and annoyed from trying to keep up with her interests

2) Even if they are genuine in wanting to find aliens, failing at finding aliens would sour the memories of being in the club for everyone.

its also great that the alien arc is divided in two episodes, cuz in the first episode we get introduced to telepathy and Takenaka, a telepath, explaining how he prefers to understand someone through eye contact rather than their thoughts.

Then in the second episode, that episode is the one that is made with much more animation frames than usual, so we get so much detail in their body language, especially Tome. AND there are times when they don't have faces. To keep the suspense that we don't know how they're feeling from not seeing their expression.

SO let's unpack all that

the telepathy club started with Tome's dream of using telepathy to contact aliens, but everyone else was in it just to laze around and play games. And they do figure that they're wasting time early on. When Takenaka leaves in the 2nd episode, they're all like "oh no! we cant let this club be disbanded, they cant let all those memories go to waste! All those memories of....lazing around and playing games and eating snacks. Oh we actually do nothing here"

They had recognised that they aren't making special memories even before meeting mob, that's why Tokagawa wanted this club disbanded and also how he persuaded mob not to join their club. and he doesn't. By the end she figures that this whole time she's the only one who cared and was dragging them along, so she disbands the club.

But then they realize how much Tome cared, so they actually work hard to make her dream happen, actually looking for telepaths and finding one. And tome keeps pushing them away, telling them she's not coming to the trip, then not answering their calls.

But She does come on the day of.

But even though she's pouting in the car and looking out the window like she's not going to try to be part of a conversation, she's actually looking at inukawa's reflection and tuning in to what everyone is saying. She's playing with her fingers to pretend she doesn't care and because she's fidgety from anxiety.

note takenaka's expression being hidden during the conversation in the car

After they almost crash, they're all out of the car except her, talking about whether to go on or cancel their plans and while they're not seeing her expression we get to see that she's disappointed. the conversation shifts and they don't get to see that expression

Later When inukawa realises that they forgot the book with the ritual, she just chuckles (which sounds sad) and said "don't mind" off screen, we don't see her face.

sometime later they do find a trail and still talk about going up the mountain. shes a bit far and stylized so we don't see her expression, saying "huh? weren't we heading back?"

they argue and... that's the mouth of someone trying not to cry.

When kijibayashi tells her " seriously kurata, who do you think inukawa and saruta painstakingly planned this out for?" KijiBAYASHI NO LOOK AT HER SHES GOING TO CRY. Her eyes shine and she starts yelling at them

"Are you seriously blaming this on me right now? I disbanded the club because all of you never tried to do anything!" Her eyes shaking and her loud inhales. Both the animation and the voice acting show her about to cry.

"I kept wondering if I should come or not because I didn't want this very thing to happen." One of her fears about this is that her dream is a pain for them, because they'd rather laze around and she's stringing them along for something they don't want to do. That's why she keeps saying she doesn't care anymore,

the way he phrased it as "painstaking" is literally the most hurtful way for her.

The thing is right after she yells at them for lying about finding a telepath and trampling on her feelings and that's she'll leave, takenaka looks at her guiltily, inukawa is uncomfortable by her yelling with his eyes darting everywhere, while mob is the one who encourages her to go on.

Out of all of them mob is the least likely to be seen as someone who'd trample on someone else's feelings. (See Emi's arc) coupled with the fact that Takenaka was convinced to help because he could tell that mob's feeling were genuine (eye contact scene), mob is the one who got this to work out that's so sweet. also She's embarrassed for changing her mind and the little blush is a cute anime addition :3 (note mob's role is more emphasized in the anime than the manga because the anime removed dialogue about mobs carsickness affecting his powers and that needs its own post)

Its really well animated, how she has all this intense emotions of excitement to see aliens vs fear of disappointment and fear of how her friends feel about this trip-and that made her so fidgety, during the walk she randomly ran on the bridge slamming kijibayashi's back, started balancing herself and a railroad, brushing her fingers against the leaves, trying to let the extra energy out.

And also making good memories about climbing the mountain, because she's not expecting anything more, and she really wants this to be a good memory, for the club to end on a good note. the "making it a good memory" is mentioned a lot

Right before reaching the top, we don't see her eyes, then the camera pans up and we do see her eyes she seems scared and amazed.

when they reach the top and ask about the spell in the book, she lies says she didn't memorise it and goes "isn't it enough that we all climbed to the top of the mountains together? We've already made plenty of memories today" so that they'll stop.

Takenaka knows its a lie cuz telepathy. So to show her that he cared, he comes clean about spending the night researching and said the other three are also taking this seriously.

The thing is she after figuring out that she's the only one who cared about the goal of meeting aliens, she was afraid that shes the one who made them feel they had to do it. She was afraid that by going along with her ambition, its souring their last memories together as a club because they don't actually want to be there.

Besides being upset that they might be messing with her and trampling on her feelings, she's afraid even if they are genuine. Because what if they fail that will sour all the memories with the club.

Remember the previous arc -divine tree arc- how becoming carried away mobs popularity and dimple's brainwashing- ends up with shallow friendships cause that can't get others honest opinion. She was afraid of being like that to them, her goal in meeting aliens made her too carried away and not notice that she was dragging people along who don't actually want to. A one-sided friendship from her end.

mob getting too carried away about being popular also lead to more hurt that he was stood up by both tome and mezato. Tome is afraid of them looking back on their relationship as an annoyance.

takenaka also tells her that everyone else were looking for him (a telepath) to make her dream happen, so everyone wanted to be involved

then takenaka says her second fear out loud "but even then, I'm scared of this going wrong, its probably better to limit this being a fantasy. Maybe all that matters in this is whether we had fun, because all my other memories with everyone may end up a joke, too. We almost got lost in the mountains because I'm forcing my delusions on them, I don't want to face reality more than this"

she was pretending she doesn't want this so that they're not pressured to keep going, but takenaka reads her mind and they do want to do this with her. even with the risk of nothing coming out of it

And even if its a failure it was still worth the effort , the journey not the destination reigen quote time: (note: anime reigen looked more genuine saying it than manga reigen)

in the anime we don't see anyone's faces but we can tell that they lost hope and trying not to feel sad

punchline is that mob is the only one with a face because he didn't lose hope

Even when she's not sad anymore and gets to show that she actually wants to be there. She's anxious, anything they try and aliens don't show up is too quickly followed by 'its fine I'm glad we did it anyway', she really really doesn't want their last memory to be a sad one. she's trying so hard to push through that even if we don't meet aliens its fine. She slams kijibayashi's back in the anime. in the manga its the telepathy club trio more exaggerated backslap

in the anime her nose gets red showing that she's holding back tears

And then the aliens show up!

And takenaka can be an interpreter, so tome- whose dream is to meet them so bad, gets to finally to talk to them about anything!

And....she has no idea what to say. She blabbers, blinks rapidly, pulls at her hair and looks around

She's so starstruck that no ideas come to her.

So! Inukawa gets the idea of playing games together, and she sighs in relief. then

And its like they were preparing for this moment! lazing around and playing games the clubs specialty! Its the group of friends who literally did nothing except eat snacks and play games! Meeting the aliens with this group of friends is special to tome because they knew how to break the ice and do what they always do. They made this experience special to all of them!

#mp100 #mob psycho 100 #kurata tome #kijibayashi haruto #inukawa mameta #kageyama shigeo #takenaka momozou #shirihiko saruta #mp100 meta #mp100 analysis #reigen arataka #telepathy club #reached image limit lol #mine

[moonysimp]

flowers and rain –mick schumacher.

short story i wrote a while ago <3

pov: you and mick took a break, but he shows up on your birthday to talk to you.

you hear a knock on your door. "did you guys order anything?", you ask your friends while you walk to the door. you open it and your heart starts jumping on your chest as you lock eyes with the last person you thought would be standing outside of your apartment. mick gives you a shy smile, holding on for dear life on the flowers he bought for you.

"happy birthday, sunshine", he says, and you can't help but want to wrap your arms around him and never let him go. all the emotions you have been pushing away for the past 4 months come at you like a wave, drowning you. your eyes water and you give in, closing the distance between the two of you. you wrap your arms around his neck and hug him, closing your eyes, allowing yourself one moment of selfishness. you feel his arms quickly wrap around your waist and you inhale his minty scent, one that you never seem to get enough from.

"thank you, micky", you whisper against his ear. god you've missed him. the hug ends as you both separate from each other, although the minute that is over you are already missing the feeling of his body close to yours. you need to pull yourself together as he gives you the flowers. of course they have to be lilies, mick never forgets how much you love them. you accept them and you extend your arm and signal him to come inside. he does and you close the door, but he quickly stops and turns to look at you.

"i'm sorry i'm here this late", he says. "i just- really needed to see you, and wish you a happy birthday".

"it's fine, we stayed up chatting and all", you say. "mom and the girls came and we had a little party here".

speaking of them, angi calls out to you from your room. "y/n who is it? hurry up or we are gonna eat all the ice cream".

"i'm coming!", you yell at her.

"if you don't mind, i'd really like to talk to you", mick glances at the door and then at you again, feeling nervous. "but if you're busy i'll just-"

"no, don't go", you blurt, hating how needy you sound. but you cant stand the idea of him going away again. you are familiar with the pain that causes. "let me go tell them you're here and we can go to the rooftop and talk privately". you search for a vase to put the flowers on before going to your room. you open the door and put your hand on your mouth, still processing the fact that the boy you love is right outside waiting to talk to you.

your friends all give you confused looks.

"what's wrong? who was it?", mom asks you.

"mick is outside. he brought me flowers. and told me he needed to see me. and talk to me. and oh wish me a happy birthday like he doesn’t know that the best present i could receive is him standing outside of my door", you tell them as you simultaneously see them all open their mouths to form a perfect "o". "so i'm gonna leave you here, and i'm gonna go outside to talk to him, so behave", you say and you don't give them a chance to say anything as you slip away from the room and come back to mick. you both leave the apartment and take the stairs to the rooftop in silence.

what does he want to talk to you about? has he missed you like you've missed him? does he also want to get together because he finds that the world without you does not seem as colorful as it was before? is he gonna tell you he met somebody else and your break is more than over? thousand of questions swirl in your mind. you get to the rooftop and you take the both of you to the pair of chairs that are always in here but he shakes his head, as you hear thunder from afar.

"i would rather not sit. since i've been sitting during most of my trip", he says, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. he always does that when he's nervous.

you let out a sigh and decide to get this over with and finally know what's going on. "why are you here?"

"you know i've never been able to lie to you, even if i were, it would never be possible for me to hide how much i miss you. because i do, y/n, so fucking much", his blue eyes look sincere, and you feel the sudden need to cry. because it is obvious the break has affected you both the same way. "i understand why we decided to take a break, and it honestly seemed like the right call at the time, but it clearly wasn't. not when i can't seem to stop longing for you at every moment of the day. so i am here now, willing to put my heart out for you but most importantly willing to listen how you feel. and finally end this doubt that eats me alive every day.", his hands grip mine as he gives me a sweet look. "do you miss me too?"

"of course i do, micky. and this break has caused more pain than good. i know we were not in the best position when we decided to part ways for some time, but it was nothing compared to the hollow feeling that is not having you with me." you feel the first drops of rain on your skin, you let go of his hands and take your hands to cup his cheeks. "i love you, mick schumacher, and not even a hundred breaks could make that go away".

rain starts falling from the sky as he closes the gap between the two of you. he kisses you with a burning passion, trying to show you just how much he has thought about this moment. your hands go to his hair and his hands grip your hips. the rain keeps coming down on you. not all the words in the world could describe the kiss, and all the magic it came with it. you break the kiss breathless, and you can't help but to smile at the beautiful boy in front of you, with his red lips and his hair soaking wet.

"this kiss? and under the rain?", you murmur against his lips. "best birthday present i could ever receive". he laughs as you hug him, your head resting on his chest, and his head resting above yours.

"i love you. promise me you will never forget that." he says, closing his eyes.

"i promise", you vow, thinking you couldn't be more in love with him.

#mick schumacher fic #mick schumacher #fanfic #f1imagines #formula1 #formula1driver #oneshot #fluff

[rk1kheadcanons]

angst between violent!markus and machine!connor? just markus' confusion as to how a fellow android could be helping the humans with connor's coldness towards the revolution (still on the verge of deviance tho!) and between the both of them, it's a last ditch effort to either change sides or finish the other off?

if you couldn't tell, angst is my jam – sending well wishes to all the admins! :)

yesyesyesyesyesyesyes

So backstory to describe or just add here - post revolution - new jericho is a new set of warehouses Connor has infiltrated to try and kill Makrus in but he traps Connor in a room with himself instead of trying to kill him immediately because hes fascinated by this deviant hunting android and wants to have a chat...

-

Just as the RK800s grip weakened Markus grabbed at the barell of the handgun, pulling it in an arc away from his body and out of Connors grip while simultaneously slamming his free palm flat on the doors interface pannel to input the code that would put the room on lockdown for one hour. Connors brow flattened into a glare as markus leveled the weapon between the others eyes and the two were finally able to size each other up from a distance, locked in a stalemate over who was going to make the next move.

Markus broke the silence first

“Why are you still doing this Connor?”

The deviant hunter hesitated, tilting his head like an animal sizing up its prey before seeming to accept the fact that he wasn't escaping the room any time soon. The moment he saw the opportunity of course he would pounce for the others throat but in the meantime...there was always information to be gathered...

“It's what I was designed for, Markus, I'm simply fulfilling my purpose”

”By killing your own people?”

The deviant leader visibly struggled to keep the disgust from his features but the hunters response was quick, blunt, and emotionless.

“We are not people.”

He was met with a scoff

“surely even you cant believe that any more”

That seemed to strike a chord. The RK800s LED flashed red for a fraction of a second, too fast for a human to perceive but Markus was not human. He saw the crack in the others plasteel armour and started pushing.

”you could join us you know? you don’t have to obey them…don’t have to kill everyone they  point you towards…”

A sardonic smirk grows across Connors face, LED hovering a steady blue.

”So you’d have me work for you instead?” he spoke with mocking light-heartedness, taking an incremental step forward “Killing everyone that you point me towards?”

Markus takes it in his stride, moves minutely forward to mirror his successor model who he had come to see as the second face to his own Janus.

“Its too late to avoid lost lives now connor, we’ve all went too far for that to be a possibility and I think you and I are two people who are aware of that intimately…”

Silence.

“Connor, surely you’d rather it be their blood on your hands rather than the blood of your own kind”

The silence continued to stretch between them and Markus could feel a thrill run through his circuits as another blip of red circled through the RK800s LED.

”What we are doing is just. It is retaliation”

The Hunter broke his gaze finally, glancing around the room in a display of faux casualness before replying.

“Theres a human phrase against that mentality you know? “An eye for an eye and the whole world goes blind”. So how long does this continue before everything goes dark Markus? Whats the end goal here?”

Markus scoffs lightly at the phrase

”An eye for an eye'… lex talionis” he shakes his head “Humans have always lived by the law of retaliation you know? Perhaps not in such a literal sense, like you might find in one of their religious texts, but the principle is the same. The perpertrators punishment must fit the crime. A fine for a theft, a jail term for an assault… a life for a life…”

The RK800s LED span a brilliant yellow...processing...listening...

”And to them this is the epitome of fair, and just, and reasonable...up until that vengeance is turned against them. Then suddenly their cries for justice become parrots of  “an eye for an eye a tooth for a tooth”. But you know the rest of the quote as well yes? “Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.”. but how many more times can I turn my face to be struck down again Connor? How many more times can you?”

#rk1k #detroit become human #this has been dust gathering in the drafts for about a year #i believe i had the initial intention to write it all the way up to connors deviation but #i have no memory of how it was intended to end... #still... #im vibing with the dialogue so i might as well free it from the prison of the draft posts #ari speaks #also im sorry but i cant for the life of me find where to insert the readmore right now

[t0rturedangel]

: ̗̀➛ ✉️ ᴬ ᴳᵁᴵᴰᴱ ᵀᴼ ᴮᴱᶜᴼᴹᴵᴺᴳ ᴺᴼᵀᴵᶜᴱᴬᴮᴸᴱ🖋️. . .

• ☆ ➛ chap 3 (last part) ╰━ warnings / notes :: possible ooc, swearing. Trying a new layout, how are we liking it? im genuinely thinking of stopping this series, its getting kind of more like a chore rather than something i enjoy writing, but i'll start a new series.

The first four periods of the day went just as expected- that is extremely boring. The only lesson which you sound to be remotely tolerable was biology but that was only because BUTTERS was there, all the other lessons you were alone, well in terms of being with friends.

In biology, you couldnt even sit near the poor boy as you wanted to sit near the back, where you'd be safe from the judgement of others behind you and while you did manage to steal a seat for yourself and butters the boy was forced to sit in the front due to his poor eyesight, his left eye was duller and grayer than his right due to the nearly completely faded scar that started from right above his eyebrow and down to right below his bottom eyelid. It was said that the reason Leopold had that scar was because back in the fourth grade, one of the school's popular boys: KENNY MCCORMICK threw a japanese weapon at him, slicing his eye. You hated the perverted blonde for that, and all his friends too.

Now though, it was lunch and you were at your and your friend's respective table and you were alone. You hated being alone, it just made you acknowledge all the sad facts about yourself and others but thankfully before your mind forced you to do so two people sat down. Looking up you met the faces of butters and SCOTT , the duo smiled at you, though both of them looked nervous. " Whats going on with you two? " you asked, raising a brow at them making butters laugh sheepishly before answering " Well , we just had a run in with eric and his friends " at that you narrowed your eyes the words 'what did he do now?' never managed to leave your mouth as now scott piped up " They didnt do anything us, they just glared at us and told us to ' piss off ' " even though you were relived that they didnt get hurt the scowl on your face never left " Why dont they ever 'piss off' " you quoted " I dont know, they think they're the shit when they're not " Scott mumbled, hoping that the people he was shit talking didnt hear him and then beat the living shit out of him.

You were about to speak up again, agreeing with your friend when you heard a tray fall onto the table, all three of you looked over to see DOVAHKIIN " Hey Dovah " you gave him a smile, along side Scott and butters. Dovahkiin nodded and sat down, pushing the tray in-between you and him, signaling that he wanted you to eat and you obliged. Ever since you two became friends the kid always shared his food with you, you didnt know why and when you refused at first he got all pissy and practically shoved the food down your throat, so you've learnt to accept his offer of food. " Anyway- scott, why the hell werent you with us this morning? " scott grimaced, a red hue resting on his face clearly embarrassed " ah . . . no-no reason "

" Uh huh " you rolled your eyes, thinking that scott got into trouble with the headteacher again, he had a tendency to do so. The rest of lunch went by quickly, with you and your friends not being bothered by the rest of the school. For once you actually enjoyed school.

Im sorry but i just cant write this series anymore, its getting a little tedious and like i said its becoming more like a chore so i'll be stopping it here, i know i've done that before i cant help it. Again im really sorry but im starting a new story called '' Яₑdₑₘₚₜᵢₒₙ "

Im so so sorry :(

i've made the ''redemption'' master list ; here

TAG LIST :: @mishstuff @just-a-gay-loser42020 @buttonboo @yanderesimp69711 @chaosblob

#: ̗̀➛ 🌊ᴵᴺᴰᴵᴱ ᵂᴿᴵᵀᴱˢ . . . 🖋️ #discontinued #sorry #really #south park #south park x reader #x reader #end of series

[lisxdumbr]

lis please do rant!! i cant get my thoughts on the story sound coherent at all and i would love to hear what you think since this was so????? but good lord that was a lot huh. literally never getting a break in anyway as a 2winkP

-🌟

After god knows how much time I tried to get my thoughts compiled ! I apologize it this doesn't make sense but I am still very unwell, I just !! I figured I'd share

JESUS CHRIST WHAT IS GOING ON IN THE 2WINK CLIMAX

I do have to say, the story started in an extremely bitter way for me. Perhaps it was about my expectations for their climax being really opposite for the first half of it, but at the end everything came together and it ended up being a much more enjoyable experience than I imagined.

Akira is still a man that no matter how much I try, I can't predict.

The story starting with them communicating almost telepathically and Yuta feeling down was an entire throwback to many moments before. Setsubun. Volcano Island.. it's always that moment in which after a lot of stress you open your eyes and see everything in slow motion happening right before you. I think Yuta was hit with this realization and that's why everything started being a burden. The lights, the audience, just the thought of him and his surroundings.

I expected Ibara to have a more important appearance in the story, however I understand he was really busy with Double Face at the same time, I still respect the figure he represents to 2wink though, I think half of this story wouldn't have gone the way it did without that little push he gave them.

I think it started stressing me out when the Anzu plot came on board. Please don't get me wrong, I love Hinaan, I think everyone should read Daybreak Heliolite. "Anzu-san, you're smiling just now..." the comfort Hinata is able to give Anzu is incomparable to any other member of the cast.

However, Anzu is mad? Anzu is angry? Why hadn't this showed before? Why weren't there signals? That repayment fes mention really dizzed me out because. after skimming through it again, wasn't Hinata just meaning to grow and prove Anzu that they were not going to be under anyone's shadow ever again? Something, something felt so bitter to me about it. Hinata's reaction was not good either, everything felt so uncomfortable, you could smell the arson between them and I guess that's what made me so. so mad.

On the other hand, you have Yuta relying on Shinobu for everything, once again, as they have always been that close. Didn't this feel like climbing a stair? Yuushino climbs one side while hinaan climbs the other, why did it feel like a competence?

I felt conflicted and stressed about their attitude, why are they doing this and what is going on? I couldn't puzzle it together until the realization suddenly hit me and everything made sense.

Hinata is growing lonely. And at the same time Yuta is drifting away to try and search for his own self, the timing couldn't be better.

We feel loneliness when we feel that there's no one near us that we can rely on. Hinata was surrounded by many, many people, but none of them understood, none of them knew how it was and how it felt.

I think I got everything when the street kids kidnapped him to make him see reality, it was their way of saying "we're like you. the same way you're like us". Hina may have fame and money now, but his heart is as dirty and as fragile as those kids'. It was not a matter of dragging him to the shadows but rather to take the blindfold out of him by screaming "please help us".

Anzu and Hinata then notice how similar they are. Yuta said it since ! era, "so Anzu, you're a big sis too, right? I'll just give you an advice, never underestimate us little brothers". See that part where Hinata says Yuta is projecting his since onto him like a mirror? I think that's what Hina was doing with Anzu. "You sacrifice yourself for everyone and that's why I cannot stand you, because you're like me.. but better".

That's the moment when Hinata realized everything and discovered he didn't have to bear the world on his shoulders, that not everything had to be pain but that there's rather another answer and that being alone is also ok. Hinata is starting that path to find out his true happiness without relying on anyone but himself.

This is what I said once about Yuta wanting to change by separating himself from Hinata, but Hinata needing to stick towards Yuta's side not to fall into the abyss.

Hinata finally understood that's not true, he finally understood he's able to live by himself and that that is ok. And that's where everything started kicking in for me.

Hinata choosing kindness and love is the perfect ending for me. That part of the story moved me so much you can't even understand. I think if I had to put this into a performance I would put a rising sun being quietly observed by the calming moon. A relationship that will always be held so close despite it never touching.

And then of course, the epilogue that drove me to tears of incommensurable joy

Yuta loves Hinata. Yuta has always and will always love Hinata like he loves anyone in this world. He's also not talking to whoever here. He's talking to us. He's asking us to please watch them become what they have always dreamed of.

Do you remember that part on Love Letter where Yuta tried so hard to unveil Hinata's 'evil' side to help him? I think he actually did.. but instead of finding an evil, twisted person in it's core, he found a gentle and healing being. Like the ying-yang, they're the perfect balance for each other.

Forever in a sweet memory, that's what 2wink is and will always be.

#this got very long #but every single emotion i feel was poured into my writing #I'm full of tears but they're tears of joy #i wonder if I'll ever be able to love someone as much as i love them #enstars #ensemble stars #2wink #yuta aoi #yuuta aoi #hinata aoi #❝ ritz.rambles !! #❝ mail !! #🌟 !! anon