#why did i choose a profession that requires early starts

[kdxart]

Mornings are some bullshit and 5am is an unholy hour that should not exist.

#kdx chatter #so fucking tired #why did i choose a profession that requires early starts #need sleeeeeeeeep

[byologee]

an actually practical guide to being premed and getting into med school by someone who did it successfully

Majors and Classes:

Personally I feel you should choose a major that will be complementary to your premed studies-- something STEM or social science based that overlaps with your premed classes and will allow you to take upper level science classes that relate to physiology, disease and illness, pharmacology, etc. HOWEVER do not let this deter you from majoring in a non-bio STEM area like biochem or from pursuing a different science or liberal arts major.

That being said, consider double majoring in Public Health because it is very relevant to premed and going into medicine.

Make sure you take the correct order of bio and chem classes. This is important so that you take classes at the appropriate time when you have the appropriate skill level and so that you do not have any gaps in your premed education or major classes.

Be aware of what upper level bio and chem classes require prereqs that are not a part of your major requirements or premed requirements; for example some upper level bio classes require microbio which is not a premed requirement at all schools NOR always a major requirement. Plan your underclassmen years accordingly to allow you to fit in certain prereqs for upper level classes.

If you plan on taking lower level lab intensive courses, take them as an underclassman-- they will prepare you with basic lab skills you can apply to upper level classes and to irl lab work, plus most of your classmates will be underclassmen. You do not want to take these lower level lab intensive courses as an upperclassman. You will be bored and probably annoyed.

Take an intro level public health class as an underclassmen to see if you are interested in public health; this will also be relevant to your med school apps.

Gen chem 1 and orgo 1 are weedout classes. Many people will switch from premed and/or bio to public health or prePA after taking gen chem 1 and orgo 1. This is normal; don’t be judgemental. If you’re the one switching to public health or prePA, don’t feel bad or ashamed.

Do not take orgo 1 or 2 with super hard progressors. It’s just not worth it. Many people say that harder orgo progressors prepare you better for the MCAT, but this is false as the MCAT does not have a lot of orgo on it. Many people will fail out of orgo even without super hard professors. Set yourself up for success by taking orgo profs with good reputations, not profs with reputations for failing everyone, being purposefully difficult, or just nasty.

If you take a (relatively) “easy” professor for orgo 1, under no circumstances should you take a hard prof for orgo 2. You will suffer.

The best way to study orgo 1 and 2 is to memorize all the reactions. Copy reactions until you have them memorized. Then you can simply apply what you’ve memorized to synthesis reactions. This works for NMR too, just memorize what NMR specs look like and apply.

Always go to TA office hours for gen chem 1, 2 lab and orgo 1, 2 lab. The lab reports are very difficult and the TAs can help you more than professors can. Professors will be mostly absent for labs. TAs will know what’s up.

You do not need to take biochem 2 for the MCAT, biochem 1 will suffice as it generally covers amino acids and proteins and not respiration and metabolism. Most of the biochem on the MCAT is about amino acids and proteins; all metabolism can be self-studied. (This is my opinion to save you time, if your advisors tell you otherwise LISTEN TO THEM and not me).

If you take AP psychology you do not need to take intro psych.

You need to take a sociology course for the MCAT and premed reqs. You should take The Sociology of Deviance if offered at your college as this is more relevant to the MCAT than intro socy.

If you have to take a professional writing class for Gen Eds, try to take a science writing or health professions writing course as these will be relevant to you.

Take stats even if you don’t have to as it is very relevant for understanding papers.

If you switch to another pre-health path like prePA or prepharm you will generally have to take different prereqs. Clear this with your advisors and come up with a plan.

Med schools like to see a diversity in courses and not just science courses, so you need to take at least 8 humanities credit hours. Diversify your college education and take interesting and relevant humanities courses; this will also help with CARS on the MCAT.

Research

Many medical schools want you to have research experience. You can do clinical research or bench research.

You should start research early, either 2nd semester freshman year or summer before sophomore year.

The best advice is to research professors and PIs in the BSCI and public health departments and email ones you are interested in about working in their lab. You can do this before 2nd semester freshman year or during that semester. Email example: Hi Dr. X, I am an undergraduate freshman at UMD and am looking for research opportunities in X field. I discovered your lab and read your paper, “X,” and am very interested in this subject! Elaborate on what interested you I was wondering if there are any open positions in your lab for an undergraduate researcher. I have taken X, X, X, courses. I would be interested in working in your lab for 2 years. Please let me know if you have any openings! Best, X

PIs generally look for undergrads to commit to 2 years of research, but you can quit earlier if you feel like it. This is also why you should do research earlier-- that way you are not cramming it in during your upperclassman years.

The goal is to get some abstracts, posters, presentations, and maybe a pub out of it, but these things aren’t absolutely necessary.

Clinical Experience

Med schools like to see 10 months of continuous clinical experience, which translates to about 200 hours. However, this number is too low and to be really competitive for med school apps you should aim for 1000 hours if not more.

The best way to gain clinical experience is to work part time as a scribe, CNA, MA, or tech. You can take CNA and MA courses the summer before sophomore or junior year and apply to positions online. CNA/MA gives you a lot of experience working with patients. Scribing gives you a lot of experience working with doctors and seeing what they do. It’s best to start clinical experience sophomore year or junior year so you can gain enough hours prior to applying.

You should also have clinical volunteering hours which you can get by volunteering at hospitals such as Children’s or Shady Grove or any other local hospital. Other clinics also accept volunteers, you just have to look around. Check your health professions advising office (hereon abbreviated as HPAO) for their recommendations and job listings if available.

You can also shadow doctors. Your HPAO may have a continuously updating list of physicians in your area who are available to shadow. You can also genuinely just email local providers. Note that you will need to shadow a DO if applying DO.

Check your HPAO listserv for job openings and clinical volunteering opportunities.

You can find jobs by googling “CNA job near me” or “scribe job near me” and browsing postings on Indeed and other job sites, or alternatively postings on hospital sites.

Community Service

Med schools like to see 10-12 months of continuous community service, or around 200 hours. This is too low, and you should aim for around 600 to be a competitive applicant.

Join school listservs and look for volunteer postings. Go to your school’s First Look Fair or college organization fair (usually held at the beginning of each semester) and sign up for emails from clubs that do volunteering or other various organizations. There are many organizations on campus that do volunteering and service.

Ideally you want to work with marginalized communities off campus. This sounds shitty but you want to work with communities who need it. You should also aim for a sustained service opportunity, not a once a month thing but a weekly, continuous experience. Volunteering through clubs and societies like the women’s premed organization are not valid experiences.

Google local homeless shelters, women’s shelters, STD testing clinics, and food banks-- these are all really good places to volunteer at. You can also volunteer at crisis hotlines.

You can also utilize clinical experience for community service, so volunteering at a hospital, clinic, urgent care, etc. But you also need non-clinical community service, so make sure to prioritize both.

Consistency is key. Doing an experience for a longer period of time (ex. 4 hours every week for 10 months- year) is very valuable. Even doing an hour of volunteering at the same place every week for two years is great. Building relationships, gaining experience, understanding consistency-- med schools value this. Long term experience is very important.

Extracurriculars

You should also be involved in extraneous, non-community service based organizations and extracurriculars. It’s ok if these organizations include some aspect of community service. This can also include paid-positions that are not clinical.

Examples include campus ministries, sports, dance, art clubs, music/choir, social, restorative, and environmental justice organizations, interest groups, tutoring, co-ed frats, etc.

Joining societies, like the American Women’s Medical Association or your college’s namesake Pre-Med Society is a great way to do extracurriculars, build your resume, and get leadership experience. You can also join major-specific societies.

Check with your HPAO for a list of pre-health societies you can join. Your college will also have a website or list of clubs and orgs you can investigate.

Med schools like to see that you are well-rounded, so having a variety of experiences is important.

Advising

It is extremely important that you build a relationship with your advisors. It is very important that you outline all the classes you want to take with them and when AND that you meet with them every semester. Discuss your plans with them, ask questions, ask for suggestions and tips. If you make any major or minor changes you need to speak with them too. They are a resource; use them.

You will also need to build a relationship with your pre-med advisors at your HPAO. You may need to do an intro workshop to be able to meet with an advisor at your HPAO.

Meet with an HPAO advisor every semester to outline your courseload, volunteering, clinical work, extracurriculars, and application plan. Your HPAO advisor will help you craft a narrative for med school apps and can help advise you with regards to coursework and what opportunities to pursue. They can help you decide when to take the MCAT, when to apply, devise a school list, etc. so it’s best to start meeting with them early. The better your relationship with your HPAO advisor, the stronger the recommendation letter you’ll get from them.

If your grades drop you NEED to speak with an HPAO advisor. You should be checking in with them every semester to go over your grades and course history and make sure you are on the right track to apply. This is really really crucial.

If your HPAO offers workshops for applying to med school, crafting a school list, financing med school, writing a personal statement, etc. then GO TO THEM. Utilize the resources that are available to you.

Make sure you are on your HPAO listserv.

If your HPAO offers peer to peer advising consider using this resource to speak with current college students who are going through the application process.

2 Areas Med Schools Look At: Leadership + Diversity and Inclusion

These are two hot topics med schools care about. Here is how to address them.

Leadership: there are numerous ways to gain leadership experience; getting elected to a leadership position in a club or organization, being a TA or UA, getting a management position at your job, or being any kind of team leader in a community service endeavor. The important thing is that you are able to express what you learned and how you grew or changed from that experience, plus how you will apply what you learned in the future.

Diversity and Inclusion: Hot topics in medicine right now, my advice is to read about diversity and inclusion in medicine and what it means-- read articles, op-eds, peer-reviewed papers, etc. There are a few ways to go about this issue; one is to find out what is unique about you that you can contribute to medicine, the second (and most important) is to work with underserved and marginalized communities. Being able to express in med school apps and interviews that you understand the difficulties faced by marginalized groups and are committed to better health and wellness outcomes is REALLY important. Being able to show awareness about diversity in medicine is so key. To do this, spend time working with the marginalized and underserved through community service and clinical work. Be able to show med schools that you understand and care about diversity and inclusion.

You should be thinking about leadership and diversity/inclusion throughout all four years of undergrad-- how will you incorporate these things into your app?

Letters of Rec

Getting letters of rec (you will need 5-6) is very important. To do this you will need to build relationships with the following…

Professors: You will need recommendations from 2 science professors and 1-2 non-science professors. To get recs you need to go to office hours, ask questions in class and outside of class, email profs questions, stay after class to ask questions, participate, show an interest in what they are teaching. Office hours are important unless the class is small. Build relationships with professors ALL THROUGHOUT undergrad. Go to office hours even if you don’t have questions, especially in junior and senior year. Go and ask them to review prior tests and papers. Ask if you can explain concepts to them to get clarification. Listen to other peoples’ questions, piggyback off them. A prof is not going to write a LOR unless they know you.

Physicians: You need to have clinical experience to get an MD LOR. And you NEED an MD or DO LOR. Get the clinical experience, then ask whatever physician you worked with the most for an LOR. Many will say you do not need a DO LOR to apply to DO schools; I cannot advocate for this as I was told by my premed advisor that I needed one. Be safe and get one if you plan to apply DO.

Other: If there is anyone else who knows you well and can write a strong LOR, ask them. Your boss, manager, volunteering organizer, team leader, club sponsor-- whomever.

Committee Letter (CL): Many med schools require these. Your college probably has a unique CL process. Go to workshops, research, and ask your advisors how this process works. Maintain a relationship with your premed advisors to obtain a good CL letter.

Building a Narrative

This is talked about a lot junior and senior year when you are applying, but it’s important to think about building your narrative all four years of undergrad.

What this means is that you want to center your application around a theme or common experiences. You want to build a cohesive resume of common volunteering, clinical, and extracurricular experiences that complement each other. You should be able to summarize all of your experiences and draw a narrative about you based on what you have done.

For example, my narrative centered around marginalized and underserved communities as well as social and restorative justice. I used my volunteering experience with marginalized, underserved kids and my experience working with traditionally underserved patients to explain why I want to be a physician, what my medical vision and mission is, and what I have learned about medicine. Because I am interested in family medicine I was able to tie my experience working with the underserved into my goal of improving community health and welfare among marginalized groups. I also discussed how my passion for social and restorative justice ties into my clinical experiences and how I plan to integrate this passion into my practice of medicine.

One of my friends centered her narrative around being a Spanish-speaking person of color AND the descendent of physicians and how this has shaped many of her experiences in medicine and healthcare.

You don’t have to plan out your experiences to conform to a pre-chosen narrative. You do have to be able to draw common themes and lessons from your experiences, however.

MCAT

Talk to your premed advisor about when to take the MCAT and what classes you need to take prior to taking the MCAT. Ideally you want to take biochem 1, physics 2, and sociology of deviance before taking the mcat along with all other prereqs.

You also want to take the MCAT before applying (ideally) so that you can craft an appropriate school list. Your MCAT will give you a boundary for which schools you can apply to. Think of the MCAT as a checkpoint you must pass to apply to certain med schools.

Many people start content review six months before their test. Some start 2-3 months prior. Do what you think is comfortable.

You can use books or purchase review courses (Kaplan, Princeton Review) or use free online review content (Khan Academy).

Practicing how to take the test is more important than content review. What that means is that doing practice tests will help you more than reviewing content. Take as many practice tests as you can (AAMC makes their own).

Do a practice test one day, review what you got wrong the next day. Repeat this enough times and you will do well on the MCAT (511+).

Don’t anticipate retaking the MCAT. But don’t exclude it as a possibility either, so plan when you take the MCAT accordingly.

General Advice:

ALWAYS listen to your premed advisors. Do not elevate advice given by random strangers (including me) on the internet above advice given by your advisors. They know you. They know your history, your transcript, your personality. Us internet people do not. Trust your advisors. They know what they are doing.

Take everything said on the internet by supposed med school app experts, med students, doctors, premeds, SDN mods and commenters, premed redditors, and other random internet people with a BIG grain of salt. We don’t always know what we are talking about.

Limit the amount of time spent on SDN and premed reddit as well as other premed online forums. It can get unhealthy real fast.

You don’t have to study all the time. It’s ok to take breaks and have fun.

Don’t be afraid to reach out and get help or ask questions. Everyone else is struggling too. Your professors want you to do well.

Do non-science related things. Give your mind a break and diversify your experience.

Failing a test is not the end of the world. Many people fail tests and classes. You won’t be alone. Always remember that the curve exists.

If you are having a problem, talk to your professors and TAs. They are there to help.

Study with people. Quiz each other. Make study guides and ask each other questions. Help each other out.

Utilize campus resources- tutoring, study groups, yoga classes, conferences and seminars, counseling, etc.

Buy the MSAR when you start building your school list. It will make comparing schools so much easier.

A B or even a C is not going to ruin your chance of getting into medical school. People get in to med schools with 3.1 GPAs. You will be ok if you fail one test, have a few Cs or Bs, withdraw from a class, etc.

Getting into med school is more about fit than anything else. It’s not about how smart you are or how good your GPA or MCAT is. Everyone has a 4.0 Everyone has a 528. What matters is fit-- who you are, what you believe, what your values are, what your aspirations are-- and how you can demonstrate these things through your application, interview, and overall experiences. Remember that top tier schools are research-oriented (Einstein, Baylor, Johns Hopkins, Harvard, Stanford, NYU, Duke, Mayo, UChicago, Mt Sinai) whereas other lower tier will be more community focused.

ALL med schools (excluding caribbean med schools and a few DO schools, looking at you DMUCOM and LECOM) are valid. All med schools are good med schools. Med school is med school is med school. You will come out with an MD or DO and you will get into residency.

Always apply DO. Just do it. DO is great, DO is a viable option and good opportunity. Do it. Do not exclude it.

Links and other Resources:

AAMC: MD applicants, helpful resources in general https://students-residents.aamc.org/preparing-medical-school/preparing-medical-school

AACOM: DO applicants https://www.aacom.org/become-a-doctor/how-to-apply-to-osteopathic-medical-college

MSAR: handbook to med schools (MD) https://students-residents.aamc.org/medical-school-admission-requirements/medical-school-admission-requirements-applicants

AAMC’s how to apply to med school https://students-residents.aamc.org/applying-medical-school/applying-medical-school

AAMC’s FAQ and tips to creating a good app: https://students-residents.aamc.org/ask-experts/ask-experts-create-winning-application

Why Diversity Matters in Healthcare https://explorehealthcareers.org/career-explorer/diversity-matters-health-care/

#premed #prehealth #studyblr #med school #mcat #my posts #mine

[trans-cuchulainn]

What are the major details that confused you about the Hound blurb? The major one that stood put to me was the "way of the farmer opposed to the sword" thing which felt very...un-Cú Chulainn. Also, if you don't mind expanding further, which details didn't you question/be confused by?

and also for anon:

okay so it is like. 2am so there are not going to be any sources here but i can't sleep so here goes!! i will go through this blurb line by line and give youse my thoughts

In 50 BCE,

reasonable. this is roughly the right time period for when the ulster cycle is set. maybe marginally earlier than i'd place cú chulainn, but i'm talking a few years, nothing to get worked up about.

Morrigan, the goddess of war,

fine. normally i'm wary of pantheonising impulses with regard to irish characters (almost none of them can be identified as a god of anything in particular, it doesn't work like that) but tbh the morrigan is like, the most plausible exception to that, so whatever. normally her name has the definite article attached to it because it's kind of a species term as well but whatevs.

has become restless as a long-lasting peace settles over Ireland.

dubious. closest i can think of to peace being reference in any texts is togail bruidne da derga talking about conaire mor's reign being like, prosperous and peaceful and whatever, and even there you've got díberg (plundering/reaving) which is what eventually fucks him over and starts the otherworldly hell spiral situation. that's roughly the right period here but conaire's doom proves you don't have to do much to nudge peace into war, and connacht and ulster are at each other's throats for years before cú chulainn comes on the scene anyway

Deciding the time of peace must end, she chooses Setanta, the nephew of the king of the north, to become her ward.

hmm. i mean. like, this isn't the WEIRDEST choice they could have made. it's still completely made-up, don't get me wrong -- cú chulainn has a lot of different foster parents in different texts and they don't agree with each other but none of them ever mentions the morrígan. but like, they do have a connection of some sort, as evidenced by their conversations. and there's that one moment in the r1 boyhood deeds where little cú chulainn is out on the battlefield and hears her (not sure which name is used here) calling out to him and it like. motivates him to do some deeds or whatever, and i guess you could extrapolate that into some kind of teaching capacity.

so like. could be weirder. if you're gonna pick anyone, you could do worse. still seems weird to me! but not on its own a major issue, i could get past this and consider it a Fun But Unorthodox Creative Decision

(the fact that she tries to seduce him in the táin probably wouldn't get in the way of this considering sleeping with his teachers/foster-mothers is far from unheard of where cú chulainn is concerned)

After a young Setanta slays the demon-hound of Cullan, he becomes known as Cú Cullan—The Hound of Cullan.

weird spelling choices, they could have at least bothered to use the genitive properly. also the hound isn't a demon, it's a ferocious watchdog -- making it sound all Otherworldly and Hellish like this kinda confuses the issue of why he would need to take its place. he needs to take its place because the cattle and people still need protecting because it is a watchdog!! but whatevs, again, it's a brief summary so they can't exactly give us all the details and this is not actively objectionable

As Cú Cullan grows older, it is apparent that an extraordinary power lies within him … and a great darkness.

ugh boring. this makes it sound like he's going to be ~tortured~ and angsty about it. give me an unapologetic murder teen please. is the ríastrad dark? sure i guess, if you're going to be boring about it. it's more like, grotesque neon in my head

When he chooses the quiet life of a farmer over the sword,

this would fucking never happen on like five different levels. obviously like anyone who has ever read anything about cú chulainn can see that this is not in his nature. he is never going to choose a quiet life. this is the kid who tricked his way into taking arms before everyone thought he was ready. also juxtaposed with the "darkness" comment makes it sound like he would Angst his way into this quiet life which. again. have you seen this kid. he is an unapologetic murder teen

the only thing i can think of that might make him temporarily want to walk away is connla's death which... depends where you position that in the timeline really, he does seem a bit fucked up by it and maybe he'd want a holiday although i can see that lasting precisely 5 minutes before someone pissed him off enough for him to murder them. but if he's being raised by the morrígan i can't see him going to train with scáthach so then he'd never meet aífe and therefore connla would never be born so that wouldn't happen. so like. whatever.

but also like. he would not become a farmer. he just wouldn't! it doesn't work! the ireland of the stories is super hierarchical, right? and this blurb has already fucking told us that he's the king's nephew (canon) so we can tell that being a farmer is Not His Place. when we see upper class figures becoming menial labourers in texts, like in cath maige tuired, it's because Things Are Fucked, Shit's Gone Wrong. people don't just decide to change their entire social class on a whim lmfao

if cú chulainn really wanted to turn his back on being a warrior he could probably make recourse to certain other Suitable Professions ... his grandad's a druid so he might have a route into that, though his dad's not so that might fuck things up a bit bc it's one of those things that's usually inherited. he does give "wisdom" in at least one text though and we also know he can write (he carves riddles in ogham in the táin) and he composes verses on various occasions so idk, maybe something in a poetic direction, though again, usually requires two generations of inheritance to be a real poet and not just a lower-class bard. warrior's kinda the main thing he's got open to him tbh. but farming? i'm not a legal expert but as far as i'm aware based on what i have read, that would fuck shit up

more likely an upset cú chulainn would just go off in search of an adventure somewhere conveniently far away until he'd calmed down (alba, or the tyrrhenian sea, or -- if we're going to get early modern about it -- somewhere like india, which frequently gets thrown into the texts with absolutely no cultural context and it's always hilarious)

Morrigan, angry at the betrayal,

of the entire social order, yes,

instigates an invasion of his homeland

i mean. if they intend this to be the táin then.... táin bó regamna does kinda make the morrígan responsible for it? not in the sense of triggering the pillow talk argument that it's in the book of leinster -- it's her getting up to her usual cow-nicking behaviours for shits and giggles. [note to readers: it is probably for more than shits and giggles but did i mention it's 2am]

but all in all, not particularly out of character that she would be at least some way responsible for this so i can vibe with this. echtra nerai also supports the TBR explanation with her fucking around with otherworldly cows and pissing people off so, yeah, whatever. the morrígan engineered this. sure.

and Cú Cullan must challenge fate itself

this is probably a controversial stance but fate feels like a difficult concept to apply to medieval irish texts. like are people sometimes Doomed? yes. there are prophecies, there are gessi, there's all manner of otherworldly fuckery that can trip you up. is that the same thing as fate? no idea. considering cú chulainn comes out alive from the táin though and his doom prophecies don't catch up to him for like, at least another decade, maybe 16 years depending on who you listen to, hard to see how that would apply here

to keep the goddess at bay.

again like she IS causing fuckery in the táin but also it's like... one time. really not the main character. but she or maybe just some crows, hard to say, do get implicated in the death tale so maybe they're doing what people often do and conflating the two? even though there's like 10-16 years in between them?

anyway as you can see i don’t think it’s wholly terrible / i’m not completely thinkshaming it. like, having cú chulainn raised by the morrígan is unorthodox but it could be a fun and creative direction so i don't object to it. making cú chulainn get sad about murder and choose to be a farmer is just fucking laughable tho, and makes me doubt their characterisations in general. so that's offputting and would probably make me think twice about buying it, if that had ever been on the cards.*

and of course sure, their cú chulainn can be a Sad Boy Who Likes Sheep, but that means he's not the cú chulainn of medieval irish lit / irish myth, because that cú chulainn is a feral murder teen who keeps killing his friends and also is way too high social status to ever be a farmer, and whose only relationship to livestock is as the watchdog who kills anyone trying to harm them (which is an important role on a farm! but like. not the same thing as Being A Farmer. mostly because it involves more murder and is essentially just an extension of his role as a warrior. or rather the other way around. he promises to protect mag muirthemne as a watchdog and this like. gets extended into him becoming its sole defender)

this has been my analysis of this blurb i hope you enjoyed it

it's now 2.30am i should try and sleep now that i've exorcised a few thoughts from my head

*as i mentioned in the tags of my other post, i don't tend to read graphic novels due to disability stuff. they're much harder for me to understand and follow than prose, to the point where some are incomprehensible, so i don't really enjoy them. there are a few i've read, but they tend to be short ones, and i'm usually not reading them in order, just admiring the art separately from the text. so it's unlikely i would read a graphic novel of this size anyway.

#cu chulainn #hound #hound graphic novel #answered #oddnub-eye #anonymous #irish mythology #medieval irish #tain bo cuailnge

[awesomerextyphoon]

A Warrior’s Heart | Phase 1: Welcome – 3

A Hero’s Welcome?

Summary: When someone with a connection to Steve’s past dies, he’s reminded of the promise he made to Dr. Erskine and whether or not he’s failed. Can Ife help him see that he hasn’t?

Characters: Steve Rogers, Ifekerenma ‘Ife’, Abraham Erskine (mentioned), Marlene Erskine (mentioned), Nick Fury, Eliza Maza, Azeneth Ramirez

Main Pairing: Stucky x Black!OFC (Ifekerenma ‘Ife’)

Rating: 18+/Explicit

Word Count: 5,801

Warnings: Depression, Talk of Death, Slightly Cynical Steve, Politics, Smutty Thoughts

A/N: I’m sorry that this so long. I really wanted to try something different with Erskine and the time around CA:TFA. Also, I wanted to explore how Steve would be feeling right after AoU (little bit of a downer, but it will get better). Furthermore, this story will diverge a bit from MCU in terms of Steve’s and Bucky’s abilities. Feedback is welcomed and greatly appreciated. Dividers were by the lovely @firefly-graphics​. Thanks to @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog​ for the beta!

Series Masterlist

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Early June 2015

“What do you have to report, Ifekerenma?”

Ife pursed her lips together,”Wanda is doing well with her training. Djamila and Nazaret had some sung her praises during their first session.”

It took a few days to convince the team and Fury to let her friends train Wanda. Luckily Nat had her back and Wanda was able to show the compound how much she improved from what Ife was able to teach her. Unfortunately, Azeneth was unable to make it due to being tied up with a BNA mission and relocating to the NYC division.

“That’s good to hear. Have you made made any progress with the others?”

Ife’s eyes casted down in thought. Vision was a no-go for now. Pietro was warming up to her, but he thought she was still suspicious (wasn’t wrong). She didn’t want to try Rhodey yet (too close to Tony). Nat was..difficult; she’ll try again later.

“I’m going to try Steve next. He seems like a safe bet, even with the serum. Hopefully, he won’t catch before it’s time. I will need Erskine’s folder though.”

Eliza’s lips turned upward in a small smile, “Agreed. I’ll have it sent to you within the hour. Best of luck, Ife.”

And with that, Ife got dressed and headed towards the common room.

  Steve leaned back and clasped his hands together behind his head in thought and vexation.

The 21st century must be fucking with him.

Right after Operation ‘Captain Briar Rose’, Steve went to Brooklyn. He could barely find any trace of his old neighborhood. The apartment complex where he and his mother lived was now a ritzy condominium with a Starbucks on the ground level.

All of the places he’d go with Bucky were now soulless veneers filled with empty promises of ‘happiness’ or ‘self-esteem’.

He remembered the time Bucky bailed him out of yet another beating by Arnie and his gang back in 1928. His mother berated him for getting in yet another fight while Bucky’s mom laughed and treated them to ice cream from the local sweets parlor. Bucky’s sisters – Rebecca, Rose, and Annabelle – were making a fuss and bursted out in giggles when Annabelle got ice cream in Bucky’s hair. It was one of the best days that year.

A T-Mobile now stands in its place.

All of his friends and comrades save Bucky and Peggy are dead; he nearly bawled in the middle of briefing when found out that Timothy ‘Dum Dum’ Dugan died and had a cry alone in his quarters afterwards.

Felt shitty about the current state of the country. It seemed as though everything has gotten worse. He found out about the Gulf, Afghanistan, and Iraq Wars. How income and wealth inequality has somehow gotten as bad as, if not worse, than the Gilded Age. Corruption has turned DC and NYC into dog and pony show.

He was furious at all of the politicians and corporations that wanted him to endorse them or their actions. They wanted Captain America’s helmet and shield to mask their heinous acts. They were the same if not worse than Senator Brandt.

Some days Steve wished SHIELD let him stay in the ice. Even worse, there were days he felt that Captain America was for an America that never was.

Nowadays, he felt even more like an anomaly.

It started when he got out of the ice. He felt a lot stronger and faster; only Thor knew the extent of it and he has to hold back a lot when fighting for fear of government asking for more of his blood. Though he suspected Ife and Natasha might be onto him.

He was a lot hungrier than before he went on ice as well. Often time, he would have late night ‘dinners’ (now it's every night), To be honest, he was a bit embarrassed at how much he ate, though the thought of pinning the blame on Ife did cross his mind. It wouldn’t work due to Ife almost never eating with the team and Sam said that he would know if Ife was the culprit. Steve suspected that Ife has been using her connections to restock the food between when he retired to his quarters and before the rest of the team came for breakfast. Also, she kept leaving him fun pop culture facts and media recommendations for the night.

Steve didn’t feel he could go to Dr. Cho since he doubted she had anything to go on in his case.

He did wonder if Ife could help him. She seemed to like helping the team and she was knowledgable about Non-Humans. Wanda’s rapid improvement in her powers and control bolstered his decision.

Sighing, Steve sat up straight in his chair and picked up the letter he received that morning. Marlene Philomena Erskine had passed away and he was invited to her funeral.

It was sad to have yet another link to his past slip from his grasp.

  Steve was finishing up another book to fight off his jitters. It was the night before the operation and he needed to have a few moments of respite from the war.

He was so engrossed in what he was reading that he failed to notice Dr. Erskine entering.

Erskine, for his part, was eyeing several books in Rogers’ makeshift bookshelf: They Odyssey, Of Mice and Men, Murder on the Orient Express, Tender is the Night, Their Eyes Were Watching God, Homage to Catalonia, and To Have and have Not.

“What do you think of the book?” Erskine asked as he sat across the startled recruit.

“Just finished. Y’think it wise to get buzzed before a major operation, sir?” Steve noted when he saw the bottle and two shot glasses on the bed.

Erskine chucked, “Calms my nerves a bit. What did you think of the book?”

Steve pressed his lips together for a moment, “It was a good read. The book had a lot of good points for something written eleven years ago.”

“What truths?”

“Well, for one thing, how technology is used to make the populace happy, but not better. The World Government found a way to get people to willingly trade self-expression, self-awareness, and their happiness for cheap happiness and comfort. Makes you wonder if the US was next, you know?”

Erskine was taken aback by his answer. It was much deeper than most of commanding officers gave if they even read the book.

Though that last sentence was interesting.

“What do you mean next?”

“Isn’t that what happened in Germany?”

Erskine sighed, “Yes and no. Most people here think Hitler came out of nowhere, but he didn’t. Not everyone in Germany was for WWI. There was a 100,000 person march in Berlin, but it didn’t matter since the Social Democratic Party failed to rise to the occasion and went along with war effort. Many were scapegoated for Germany failure, Matthias Erzberger for instance.”

“What about the Weimar Republic?”

Once again, Erskine was taken aback by Steve’s knowledge, “Weimar Germany was a great place to be creative, curious, and make new discoveries. I met my wife, Greta, in Berlin during that time. I made a lot of friends, friends I had to leave behind.”

Erskine frowned as his face darkened,”The terrible thing, my friend, was not that Hitler was dangerous, it was that either people didn’t take him as the threat he was or they wanted to use him for their own ends. The cops and judges sympathized with the Nazi Party to get one over the Socialists and Communists. Industrialists wanted to make money off of the Nazis getting into power. Even the German and International newspapers didn’t cover him with the urgency required.”

“That’s terrible.”

“Ja, and it almost happened here, didn’t it?”

Steve nodded in reference to the America First movement and the German American Bund. He still remembers getting the crap beaten out of him by the Silver Shirts when he spoke out against them a few years ago.

“So why did you choose me?”

“I suppose that is the best question.” Erskine admitted while glancing at Steve’s bookshelf, “What do you think of the Odyssey?”

Steve shrugged, “The adventures were fun, but they were just fantasy.”

“They may not be, Mein Freund. How old do you think I am?”

“Uh, mid sixties?”

Erskine laughed, “You’re too kind. I will be 94 this September,” he smiled noting Steve’s shock, “Things are not always as they seem. I come from a long line of ‘healers’ dating back to before Rome. One of them was able to ‘make a man more’. They inspired me to go into this profession.”

“Making super soldiers?”

“Medicine and bio-chemical engineering.”

“Oh”

“Did you know that you will not be first to undergo this?”

“Who was?”

“His name was Konrad Jager. He was a lot like you: small, frail, but had a great deal of courage and compassion. He was willing to fight Nazis in the streets knowing he’d lose. One day in 1930, his parents begged me to save him as the doctors had given up all hope.

I was woking on a serum that would make the body impervious to all diseases rather than wait for the next outbreak to occur. I thought it would propel the medical field.

The trial worked and he was healed. He became much taller and broader in size as a result.”

Erskine pulled out a picture of himself next to a tall, well-built young man.

“That’s Konrad isn’t it?”

“Yes. I was able to help eight more people through the earlier version of the serum. All but one turned out well.”

“What happened to the one?”

“Ah yes, Eren Kant. He was a shy young man before the serum, but then became more like Hodge: a philander, arrogant, and bit of a bully with a temper. He ‘grew too big for his britches’ as one would say and was arrested by the Munich police. He let his arrogance blind him and he escaped in a way that intrigued Der Fuhrer and was taken to Berlin soon after. By this time, rumors had spread of my work and the Nazis were anxious to be the ‘best of the Aryans’. They were able to get my whereabouts from Eren and sent Schmitt to fetch me, but I was already on my way to Switzerland when he reached my home.”

“How did he get you?”

Erskine slightly jerked his head to the side and back, “A year prior to my attempted escape, I met a man in Geneva who warned of the dangers that lied in Berlin. He gave me his card if I needed to escape. In retrospect, I shouldn’t have waited so long before I made the phone call. I was tipped off by an old colleague of Eren entering Nazi custody.

Everything was set. My family and I were to enter Switzerland by crossing Lake Constance. We made it to Meerburg and the lake was in sight when Schmitt and his agents cut us off.

Schmitt believed that there was a power left behind by the gods. He believed himself to be a leader of a new race of men. He wanted me to ‘perfect the serum’, make him stronger than Eren. He had my children, Klaus and Marlene, taken to the outskirts of town as insurance implying that they would be sent to Dachau if I should fail.

I stalled for as long as I could hoping Schmitt would forget about me, but it was not meant to be. A few years after I was taken hostage, Schmitt stormed into my lab and pointed a gun to Greta demanding I give him the serum.”

“Did it make him stronger than Eren?”

“It did, but it had...side effects. The serum was not ready. Schmitt’s skin turned red and his face became so disfigured that Hitler called him the Red Skull. He killed Greta with his bare hands,” Erskine wiped away a few tears, “and ordered Marlene and Klaus to be sent to Dachau while I was banished to the dungeons.

Fortunately, Agent Carter and the SOE were able to save Marlene and myself. Though Klaus sacrificed himself when the agents could only save one of them.”

“Your son is a hero.”

“I only wish I could’ve told him that myself. But, back to your original question. I chose you because, like Konrad, you are a weak man. You see, the serum amplifies everything; good becomes great and awe-inspiring, bad becomes worse and a nightmare. Men who are strong their entire lives often do not value strength and abuses it. However, a weak man who is compassionate and brave will use it to help others. You were chosen because you had the aforementioned virtues and because you use your mind.

The world does not need perfect soldiers, look where that has gotten us. No, what we need right now are good men.”

Erskine poured out two shots and gave a glass to Steve.

Steve raised his glass, “To the little guys.”

The liquor was just about to touch his lips when Erskine snatched the glass from him, “What are you doing? You have an operation tomorrow. No fluids.”

Steve chuckled as Erskine bid him farewell and good luck tomorrow.

  Ife found Steve in the Common Room hunched over a chair with a letter in his hands. Emotional echoes of gloom came off in waves as she approached him.

“Whatcha looking at, Steve?”

When Steve didn’t respond, she gently placed a hand on his shoulder, “What’s wrong?”

Steve finally turned to Ife, “I received an invite to a funeral. It’s for Marlene Philomena Erskine, Dr. Abraham Erskine’s daughter.”

Ife nodded in understanding; he feels that he failed Marlene by not protecting Dr. Abraham Erskine.

But in fact, he didn’t fail her.

She lived quite the life for a human.

Not long after her father’s assassination, Marlene became a badass mechanical engineer and physicist. Her designs and schematics for transportation vehicles and energy storage/distribution gave the colonizer nations a fighting chance during the Wars Against Colonialism.

Though part of it was because the UA was a little cocky at that point. Marlene sure lit a fire under their ass! Ife can still hear her Aunt Eziamaka pouting at the news of one of UA bases nearly falling into their control.

Marlene’s assistance with the war effort didn’t last long as her gratitude towards the people who saved both her and her father wasn’t enough to overlook the Military’s treatment of some her colleagues.

Her life from there was pretty standard. She became a professor at MIT, got married and had a few kids.

BNA took her off the ‘humans of special interest’ list in 1971.

Thinking back on it, Marlene may have had a better life by her father not making it past WWII.

Though Ife thought it would be wise not to mention this to Steve.

“When is the funeral?”

Steve didn’t raise his head, “It’s in a week.”

“In that case, might I accompany you?”

“Yes...and thank you.”

“No Problem! See you later.” Ife wrapped her arms around him in a quick hug and went on her way leaving Steve slightly bewildered.

  Steve didn’t know what to make of Ifekerenma.

She was always asked the team how they were feeling at what seemed to be the right moment. Shoot, she even talked to custodial staff that few of ever acknowledge. Compassionate to nearly everyone, especially the child hostages during the last mission.

She’s nerdy to the point of Sam jokingly calling her a weeb (anime lover?) when she walked around in an oversized Cowboy Bebop t-shirt once. Wanda mentioned a ‘digital friend’ in her room and caught her mentioning how slow Stark’s tech was much to the amusement of team at Tony’s expense.

Steve’s certain Nat sent Clint a video of the whole thing.

Also, she was what Sam called a ‘Supreme Chef’. He contently patted his midsection remembering the feast she prepared for the team last night. Her cooking would’ve put some of Stark’s gourmet chefs to shame. She asked the team what they liked and she ended up having to create a dinner rotation. Steve was especially touched when she went to an antique bookstore for a recipe that was close to what his mother would’ve made for him.

Furthermore, she would leave out little homemade treats/ snacks at night. Pietro and Sam would sneak some when they thought no one was looking. She even giggled when he accidentally let out a huge belch after an amazing dinner a couple nights ago saying it’s a sign of thanks on her home planet, Avlenia.

Ife always called him Steve; not ‘Captain’ or ‘Cap’ or even ‘Good ol’Century Virgin’ (damn it, Tony!). She never made light of him ‘taking an ice nap’ or asking him about the 1940s in a demeaning way like some reporters and ‘little upstarts on social media’. Somehow, Ife found out about his love of drawing and got him art supplies with a list of recommended artists

She made him feel more like a person and not a symbol or a far off figure who’s emotionless.

Steve felt warm whenever he was around her in a way not unlike Bucky or Peggy though much more like Bucky. She seemed to sense that he was desperate to truly be seen in way that only Sam and sometimes Nat has.

It also didn’t hurt that she was a total knockout. He had the, ahem, pleasure of seeing her out of her uniform and training outfits a few times. She usually wore clothes that were more on the modest side...except for that one time when she wore a Sailor Moon crop top and high-waisted shorts as a dare from Nat. Half of the compound was staring and Steve spent most of the day in his quarters nursing a hard on he was so aroused.

And yet, Ife was one of the toughest women he knew; even Nat was a little scared of her (at least, he thinks). She might be the strongest person physically and she doesn’t take shit from people who badmouth her or the team; Agent Roussel learned that the hard way.

All in all, Ife was...something else, someone he wanted to get close to.

  The day of Marlene’s funeral started out well enough.

Ife spent the early morning making Sam’s request of cinnamon rolls, sausage, omelettes, waffles, and hash browns since he won the raffle of Vision’s turn as he doesn’t eat.

She was handing out everyone’s first servings (didn’t care what happened afterwards) when she felt Steve’s emotional echoes of depression, melancholy, and despair noting how his eyebrows furrowed and how tense his body language was.

She just hoped she could get to him.

  Steve was walking to garage hoping his outfit wasn’t too much.

Nat somehow convinced him into wearing a Highbridge Black Custom Suit with an Eastley Dobbey Blue Shirt, a Black Solid Tie, a Navy Blue Pocket Square, and Ink Black Dress Shoes.

He ‘upped the swoon dial’ as Nat put it. Could’ve sworn he heard Sam snickering.

Steve reached the entrance hoping not to keep Ife waiting when he heard clicking of heels behind him.

He turned around to find Ife looking almost unearthly.

She was wearing a black Ankara (?) dress with a cape that was black on the outside and golden on the inside with various blue, silver, and khaki rectangle clusters. Her hair was mostly contained in a wrap with a few strands framing her lovely face. Her full, plump lips were coated in a Light Plum (?) Matte Lipstick and she wore minimal gold eye shadow.

Her outfit did a splendid job of hinting at her voluptuous curves without needlessly flaunting them like the women who throw themselves at him at press tours.

Ife smiled at him and asked which car were they taking.

Steve motioned to one of the Black SUVs and the two of them strapped in for the three hour car ride.

  Ife sighed and gazed out the window at the scenery. Neither one of them had said anything in the past twenty minutes. Steve wasn’t a fan of most of the music that’s on the radio despite Sam’s best efforts. Ife had to break out her puppy dog eyes to get him to let them listen to some instrumental music from her favorite movies.

It seemed that they weren’t going to say anything until Steve cleared his throat.

Ife, not wanting to suffer in silence, decided break it, “How did you know Marlene?”

Steve raided his eyebrows for a split second, “I didn’t. I just feel like I should pay my respects, you know? I mean, I should attend the daughter of the man I failed’s funeral.”

The last sentence struck a chord with Ife. Emotional echoes of despair hit her like a tsunami.

Tentatively, Ife continued, “How did you fail Erskine?”

“I-I don’t think I’ve fulfilled my promise to him. The country has changed so much since I was on ice. It’s funny; I thought that Brave New World would only have a one of two aspects come to life, but I didn’t see nearly the whole book being right.”

Ife didn’t argue with the last two points. The US was nothing but a never-ending commercial sometimes. People were too busy being ‘happy’ or trying to get the newest thrill to realize that they were living in a sham of a republic.

Though she was concerned about the first sentence.

“What was the promise you made to Erskine? If you don’t mind me asking.”

Steve turned slightly, “To be true to who I am; a good man, not a perfect soldier. To be more like Konrad.”

Ife nodded musing on his answer. Erskine would want everyone he helped to be a good person considering the dangers of such power.

Though she wondered if she knew Dr Abraham’s full history.

Abraham Erskine came from a long line of Homo Magis who specialized in Alchemy . He turned to science when it was clear that his magical powers would never manifest (being only 1/16 Homo Magi). Erskine started working on what would become the Super Soldier Serum in 1920 after the witnessing the horrors of WWI firsthand as a medic.

He made a breakthrough in 1927 when he found what looked to be an old power cell in the attic of his childhood home. Turns out it was a modified Atlantean battery dating back to the 1600s, but whatever.

Konrad Jager was the first of nine volunteers; most of whom went on to fight in the Spanish Civil War with the International Brigades and be part of the German Resistance’s Special Forces during WWII.

Needless to say, they were recruited into BNA’s European Division.

Only Eren Kant was deemed a failure in the end.

Ife shook her head at the info in Erskine’s folder.

Eren was pompous dumbass who broke himself out jail by bending/breaking the bars of his cell after getting arrested for being a player and bully by the Munich Police in August of 1935. His show of superhuman strength got Erskine’s work onto the Hitler’s radar. BNA had to send a cleaner to ‘handle’ Eren before he could get everyone in even more trouble.

She wondered if Konrad and the others would make an appearance.

“What do mean by not staying true to yourself?”

Steve sighed, “It seemed a lot easier to do so in my time.”

Ife wanted to go further, but she couldn’t. Steve was punishing himself up for something he couldn't control and it was tragic.

She hoped that she could actually help him, not for the mission, but for himself.

  They arrived at the venue twenty minutes early. Steve was trying (failing) to fix his tie while Ife was looking as glamorous and poised as can be.

Sensing Steve’s unease, she gave his hand a comforting squeeze, “You’ll do fine,” she whispered as she fixed his tie while not trying inhale his delicious natural scent like a creep (again).

“Let’s go inside.”

  Everyone seemed to stop what they were doing when they entered the venue. Though Ife had to hand it to the guests; no one asked Steve for an autograph or a selfie. She noted several BNA officials and a couple of Earth-based Non-Human big wigs in attendance.

Guess Marlene was popular.

“Ife!” Azeneth shouted as she strode over to from a corner and enveloped her in a hug.

“Azeneth, how are you? I didn’t think you would be back from Mexico City so soon.”

“Well, the mission was short and they wanted me in New York to accompany Eliza here. Now, who is this fine gentleman, Ife?” Azeneth queried while Steve started shifting uncomfortably.

“This is Steve Rogers, one of my new teammates and Ca-”

“Captain America. I know, Ife. I was jesting.”

Ife sighed dramatically while rolling her eyes, “Steve, this is Azeneth. She’s one of my best Earth-based friends.”

“Kickass friend.” Azeneth corrected, “How are you liking Ife? She’s not too much trouble.”

“Stop it, ‘Aze!” Ife playfully hit Azeneth’s shoulder, “Feel free to ignore her, Steve.”

“Hmm, no. I don’t think I will, especially after the stunt you pulled on the first day at the compound.”

Azeneth burst out laughing at Ife’s shocked expression and Steve’s sly grin. She probably would’ve kept goin if not for Eliza cutting into their conversation.

“Excuse us, Mr. Rogers. I’ll have to speak with Ife for a moment. My name’s Eliza Maza, by the way.”

  Once they were out of Steve’s line of sight (Azeneth was keeping him busy), Eliza activated a noise canceller.

“So did anyone die in the attack on the Magic Council?” Ife asked as she made sure Steve wasn’t looking at them.

“No one was harmed, but several books are missing from the library.”

“Shit! Okay. Well, would Dr. Strange be available to assist Wanda with her training? Wong and Nazaret are at the Sanctum and he said that he knew of some spells that could help.”

“I’ll look into it. I should have an answer in a week”

“Okay.”

“Ife, please give me a call when you get back to the compound.”

Ife eyed Konrad Jager, Gregor Eisenberg, Sonje Decker, and Lukas Denhart making their way to Steve. She hoped they weren’t going to drop an info bomb on him today.

“I will.”

  The service was short and sweet as Marlene didn’t want everyone to be bored to tears on her behalf. The crowd got a laugh out that joke.

Afterwards, Marlene granddaughter, Zahara, requested if Steve could stay for a bit. She gave him a beautifully wrapped package.

“My grandmother wanted you to have this. She saw you fighting in the Battle of New York and knew you would know what to do with it.”

“It would be an honor, Miss.”

  Ife thought about her earlier conversation with Steve on the say back. She realized what’s happened to Steve was heartbreaking.

Here was a man who gave up everything for a country that only wants him as a cudgel for their heinous deeds. Someone who, if he hadn’t fallen into the ice, would’ve probably been ruined by the same country he swore to protect. They would’ve labeled him as a communist and destroyed his good name for not immediately getting on board with the next war.

To be honest, Ife didn’t think much of Steve before joining the team. She thought he was just the banner boy for colonizers to feel good; he was the reminder of that brief moment when the US was totally the bad guys (totally being the operative word).

But now?

She saw the toll the helmet and shield had on him. Ife doubted he knew that he was going to be alive for awhile judging how neither Konrad or the others aged a day since they received Serum 1.0 and Steve supposedly got one that was at least 3x as powerful.

She wanted to comfort him somehow, but she was lost on what to do.

When she got back to the compound, she gave Steve a hug and went straight to her quarters to call Eliza.

“Eliza. I can’t do this by myself, and if we’re going to pull this off, I’m going to need some serious backup because the Avengers need some serious help.”

  Fury was going through some mission reports when he heard a knock on his door.

“Come in.”

Oddly enough, Ife was the one to enter the room and not Maria Hill.

“Good Evening, Fury. I have someone who would like speak with you.”

“Well, give me a name and contact info and I’ll see what I can do.”

“Actually,” Ife reached in her pocket for a disc, “I can do you one better.”

Ife tossed the disc into the air and a moon-door portal formed from it. Out came Eliza, Azeneth, and Angela in her gargoyle form.

Eliza gave Ife a quick nod and turned to Fury, “Good Evening, Nicolas Fury. My name is Eliza Maza and we’re from the Bureau of Non-Human Affairs or BNA. I would advice that you lower your weapon. It won’t do you a lick of good,” Fury lowered his gun,” Good. Put Maria Rambeau on speaker, we need to talk.”

  -Somewhere in France-

 Maeve was enjoying her brunch while watching the footage of Eliza officially making contact with new SHIELD and SWORD.

“Well, it looks like it’s time to ‘get the band back together’ as the kids would say.” She chirped to the woman across the table.

“That expression pretty much died in the 90s. No ‘kid’ uses that phrase anymore.” Koronis deadpanned.

Maeve scoffed, “Anyone born after 1800 is a ‘child’ to me. This is what I get for trying not to sound like ‘an old hag’ as you put it.”

“Well, is everything on track?”

Koronis, or Carol, closed her eyes for few seconds, “I see nothing standing in our organization’s way. However, we should have the meeting sooner rather than later.”

“Duly noted. Anything else?”

“The new variable, Ifekerenma, will be more useful to our plans than I originally anticipated.”

“Oh, I do love surprises! I mean, I know how it will end, but I still like to be at least a little surprised. I knew it was a good idea to let Klaue be discovered by Ultron in Istanbul!”

Another woman walked up to the pair,”You wanted to see me, Mistress?”

“Yes. Svetlana, call the others. It’s time to put our plan into high gear. Hell’s Moon is upon us.”

  Steve was having a shitty birthday.

The press was pestering him about the presidential election. Several outlets have called him a sellout and a coward for not endorsing anyone.

He was figuring out the best way to take a shower and hit the hay in less than 30 minutes when he found a beautifully written note taped to his door.

It said to come to Ife room wearing his best dancing clothes.

Ten minutes later, Steve knocked on her door and it instantly opened to reveal a modest dancing hall not unlike the ones he went to with Bucky before the war.

He was so lost in thoughts admiring the place that he failed to notice Ife hovering a few feet from him.

“Happy Birthday, Steve! How do you like it?”

Steve turned to see Ife in a knee-length golden yellow African Wax Print Ankara dress with cold shoulders, ruffled sleeves, and a v-neckline. He didn’t miss the modest view of her cleavage or how her legs looked oh, so smooth in the dress.

Ife, for her part, was super nervous about this. Nat said that people went to dance halls all the time in the late 1930s and 1940s and it took her five days to get the architecture, the music, and the lighting just right.

She hoped that Steve wouldn’t be angry with her.

Steve looked incredibly handsome in his simple dress shirt and slacks. His powerful shoulders, thick biceps, trim waist, and beefy thighs were accentuated by the lighting which made him look like he was glowing.

Ife would’ve drooled if she knew that he didn’t like it when most women would throw themselves at him.

“It’s amazing. Thank you.”

“I’m sorry about the dress. I couldn-”

Steve raised a hand to stop her from going off on a tangent,”You look beautiful.”

Ife felt a flurry of warmth in her core at the compliment.

“So, what would like to do?”

Before Steve could answer, Duke Ellington’s Don’t Mean a Thing starting playing.

Steve stretched out his hand, “Would you like to dance?”

Ife took his had and they glided onto the dance floor.

“Where did you learn to dance?”

“Bucky’s mom made us learn when Bucky started getting attention from the girls at school. She thought it best that we knew how to treat them to a good time.”

“I see,” Ife giggled, “Then she was wise to make take the lessons. Though I’m more familiar with the jitterbug.”

Steve chuckled as they resumed swinging. He hummed a bit as they danced to Ella Fitzgerald, Caro Emerald, Jo Stafford, Billie Holiday, and Gene Krupa.

Ife was impressed with Steve’s dancing skills. What were those women thinking passing him up like that?!

After a couple more rounds of dancing, the music shifted to something more modern but not (it was Howl’s Moving Castle’s Main Theme) , the colors on the walls and ceiling brightened, and several chandeliers formed on the ceiling.

Steve gave Ife a slightly confused look and asked her if she would like to try a waltz this time.

The song lasted a little more than five minutes. Steve was somehow able to lead their movements in sync with the song.

Ife felt her body was aflame with gentle yet commanding touches Steve was giving her. He even lifted her a few times making her feel as though she was flying with how gently he held her.

They were absorbed in their own world they either failed to notice or ignored Nat and Wanda entering Ife room to see if they could have another spa day. Nat even got a few pictures of the two dancing.

Steve gave Ife one last life during the climax and pulled her in when the music came to a close. They were about to come in for a kiss when Ife pressed her lips together and back away.

“We should probably retire for evening. Goodnight, Steve.”

Steve’s shoulders slumped in defeat, but left Ife’s room with a simple goodnight with Nat and Wanda in tow.

Ife frowned. She knew Steve wasn’t in the best place for a relationship and her conscience wouldn’t let her take advantage of that.

#steve rogers #steve rogers x ofc #stucky #stucky x ofc #mcu imagine #avengers imagine #marvel fanfiction #steve rogers imagine #mcu smut #mcu fanfiction #black fanfiction #black fantasy #steve rogers angst #steve rogers fluff #marvel au #a warrior's heart #mcu #alternate history #captain america #captain america angst #captain america fluff #steve x black!reader #steve x ofc

[anextraordinarymuse]

Why I think Elizabeth will choose Nathan

(AKA let’s scream about this together because apparently it’s just going to be stuck in my head until I share it)

So, there are actually two different classes of reasons why I think Elizabeth and Nathan will end up together: one that’s motivated by the characters and one that’s motivated by the editing and writing choices ( the way scenes are shot, the common themes we see in the show and even the dialogue itself). I’m going to try to talk about it all in one post, but it might get long (and I might decide to split it up, we’ll see). 

Under a read more because it gets long.

In no order, and I will forget many points I’m sure ... 

Elizabeth sought out Nathan. Granted, her initial reasons for doing so had nothing to do with romance or courtship, but I still think it’s important to note that Nathan did not seek out an acquaintance with Elizabeth. Even once they were introduced and might have occasion to speak and get to know each other, it was Elizabeth who drove that particular wagon forward. Well, and Allie since she was kind enough to get herself in trouble a few times and force them into a conversation.

Nathan and Elizabeth are presented as a united front/partners/etc very early on by giving Allie problems that require an approach from both her parent and her teacher (i.e. Nathan and Elizabeth talking to Allie about why it’s wrong to take things from the other kids). It takes almost no time for the show to demonstrate that Nathan and Elizabeth’s inherent ideals are aligned, and Elizabeth states very early on that she’s impressed by Nathan’s parenting.

Nathan and Elizabeth show each other more vulnerability very early on that we see with Elizabeth and Lucas. It’s like the second or third episode that Nathan even shows up in that he shares the story of his sister dying and him raising Allie, and it leads to a moment of vulnerability between Nathan and Elizabeth. This trend only continues from there.

Nathan is a Mountie so there’s kind of no way to avoid this, but it’s established very early that Elizabeth goes to him for help and trusts that he will fix things/find people/solve problems. But, this actually starts with Elizabeth helping Nathan find Allie on her first day of school when she doesn’t show up. So, they’re showing us that not only are these people equal partners, but that they also learn that they can trust and depend on one another pretty much from the get go. This is a big deal, especially with Elizabeth. Also, I think we know by now that she is big on trust, dependability, stability, and honor - so Nathan is bound to get her attention because he’s basically exactly what she’s drawn to. 

Nathan and Elizabeth are both basically public servants. There is a sense of duty to their professions that they share and that creates a bond between them. I think this bond is absent with Lucas and Elizabeth because Lucas is more of a business man than a public servant (which is totally fine, of course). 

Lucas (indirectly) put Elizabeth in a dangerous situation - that Nathan rescued her from. This is both a character driven and a writer’s room choice that makes me think that Elizabeth will choose Nathan, because this definitely a call back to all of the times that Jack saved Elizabeth. The situation is similar to when Elizabeth and Julie are kidnapped and Jack rides back to save them: Elizabeth and Lucas are being held at gunpoint and Nathan comes in for the rescue. I’d consider this a very deliberate choice on the writers’ part that highlights two points of interest. One is that Nathan has that hero impulse that Jack had (and that Elizabeth values and appreciates), and the other is a little more indirect and hidden. Lucas is the reason that Elizabeth was in that situation, and yet from the outside or a romantic standpoint, Lucas is the safer option because he doesn’t have a career that puts him in danger. This is an interesting  example of displayed danger vs perceived safety. 

The first man out of Lucas and Nathan to interact with little Jack is Nathan. Nathan takes notice of him in a way that is natural to someone who likes kids - he’s also the first person we see holding Jack (and Elizabeth melts faster than a plate of butter in the hot sun watching that, she’s freaking glowing when she sees that). This doesn’t mean Lucas is bad with kids or doesn’t want them, just that the writers made a conscious decision to show Nathan interacting with little Jack and highlighting that he’s also a single parent. Another score for Elizabeth and Nathan being equals and sharing things. 

Nathan and Elizabeth share some very sweet and romantically charged moments in the Christmas episode, and you know how this show likes their Christmas episodes. We not only see some shy flirting between Nathan and Elizabeth, we also see some foreshadowing of their future family when Elizabeth and Allie are telling Nathan where to put the Christmas tree and then the three of them decorating it together. 

 Elizabeth truly, genuinely doesn’t like it when Nathan is upset with her/giving her the cold shoulder/shutting her out. Her face totally gives her away. 

Elizabeth interacts with Nathan in important places: the Mountie office, her home, and the school house. Those three locations hold a lot of emotion and importance for Elizabeth, so I think it’s worth noting. At least in the case of the school house and the Mountie office, it feels natural at this point to see Elizabeth and Nathan together/interacting in those spaces. 

We’ve gotten a lot of family-centric content from the Elizabeth and Nathan relationship, and basically none from the Elizabeth and Lucas relationship. Elizabeth has a relationship with Allie outside of Nathan, but she also helps Nathan deal with Allie’s struggles and behaviors. AND, she helps Nathan with his own unresolved family issues (his anger with his father and unwillingness to believe anything good of him until Elizabeth encourages him to check out his claims of innocence). Juxtapose that with the first time that Elizabeth meets Lucas’s mom and she basically drops a bomb in Elizabeth’s lap and then asks her to keep it a secret from Lucas, which drives a wedge between Lucas and Elizabeth. 

Nathan makes inroads with Elizabeth’s friends and family (kind of without meaning to, honestly). He knows Lee and Rosemary and is friendly with them (in fact, he teams up with Lee in like episode one when they’re investigating the disappearance of Lee’s payroll, but we really see him on friendly terms with Bill. Now, again, this is somewhat unavoidable since Bill insists on doing sheriff work and Nathan’s a Mountie, but we see that Bill is also concerned with Nathan’s emotional state and reaches out to him when he needs some friendship. (I’m thinking specifically of the axe cutting scene when Nathan learns that Elizabeth is out of town with Lucas and Bill comes to chop wood with him because he knows Nathan is upset. It’s such a sweet scene). Lucas is friendly with these people too, but Nathan is literally putting down roots with the people that are important in Elizabeth’s life. Again, it might be unavoidable to some extent since Nathan is bound to create bonds with the people he’s duty bound to protect.

We get to see Nathan and Elizabeth argue. This is so important to me, and I think important to the characters and the relationship as well. Being comfortable and secure enough with one another to argue is crucial to a healthy relationship. Also worth noting here is that while they argue, they do it in a way that is not harmful (i.e. they don’t accuse or attack each other or resort to verbal jabs. They call attention to the behaviors that they don’t agree with without making it an attack on the person a la Nathan being upset with Elizabeth for running out into the storm and endangering herself, and Elizabeth calling Nathan out on shutting her out when he was jealous).

There’s more, but I’ve been working on this for longer than I want to mention, so I’m going to end it there. I might add to it later when my brain starts working again. As always, feel free to add your thoughts!

#wcth #nathan x elizabeth #nathan grant #elizabeth thornton #elizabeth x nathan #Jess's thoughts #Jess' thoughts

[fyrapartnersearch]

Looking for some sci-fi shenanigans!

Obligatory long post ahead warning: this post is quite long and I know it may be intimidating to some readers but please don’t let it put you off if you’d still like to rp with me :)

Hello ladies, gents and fellow rpers. After having a writing blast and seeing how I’ve got room for some more partners I’ve decided to come back in search of some partners who are interested in what I’m looking for.I’ve got a good ten or so odd years of rping experience under my belt but any potential partners do not necessarily have to have the same experience, they simply need to fit under these three things:

-third person only with correct spelling, grammar and punctuation.

- at least one small (no less than seven lines) paragraph per post as well as being willing to write more if the situation calls for it. Please do not contact me intending to give me only small paragraphs with each response as the above is simply the bare minimum I’ll accept if there’s not much going on in the rp that warrants a full paragraph.

-no one liners, one worders, script talk, poorly written sentences or just laziness in general.

This isn’t terribly much to ask for as picky as it sounds.

An important thing I shall mention is that NSFW (i don’t fade to black nor do I care when the smut happens. Just please don’t leave me once the smut has happened like lots of people seem to unfortunately do) and dark themes are a thing that occur in all my rp’s so I require you to at least be eighteen before you reach out to me. I will not accept anyone younger than 18 since I myself am in my early twenties. Underaged characters are also a no go as well. Please know that I’m in the eastern Australian time zone but almost any time zone Is compatible for me as I am awake at very odd hours. Another important thing I shall add is that you must be able to post at least once or more a day and if I don’t get any response after two weeks then I shall simply move on (only exception is if you notify me beforehand as to why you may not be able to post for a while. I’m not that vicious).

I only rp as male characters, as it’s simply my preference, I do MxM or FxM pairings. I will not double and I do not play multiple characters. I don’t do sub/dom dynamics when it comes to any aspect of the relationship. My characters are also non human (they’re aliens since this is a sci-fi rp after all) but what species your character is doesn’t matter to me at all as long as it’s not some god modded Mary Sue. Please remember that alien simply means a creature not from earth. Aliens can have fur, scales, feathers, etc, depending on where they come from. An alien with fur or scalies is not a furry or a scalie and please do not refer to them as such as it’s rude to label someone’s character as something they’re not. I will not write with someone who will insist that the theory of chimpanzees and humans unable to crossbreed should apply to hybrid characters regardless of whether they’re alien/alien or human/alien. This is fiction, not reality. Please also do not control my characters or dictate their actions. My characters are also premade and only have descriptions, I don’t do face claims or pics. I also do not care if you make a character up on the spot.

Please remember that this is a sci-fi rp and that I will not accept requests to do fandoms or any genre that doesn’t fit within the category of sci-fi. i will not accept a character that has no place in a sci-fi rp either like a dragon,harpy,demon, elf or some other fantasy creature.

First day on the job:

Everyone at the space academy remembers graduation day. The day where they became recognised as the very things they strived to be whether it’s a pilot, an engineer, mechanic, a simple Jack of all trades or even a commander if they worked hard enough. Everyone also remembers the few days after the big Moment as well. Days where one is expected to take to whatever rank they’ve had bestowed upon them almost immediately and the responsibilities that came with it as if they’d been born to do it from day one. Some things are easier said than done though, especially when trouble finds ways to manifest in forms that many would not suspect to be of any cause for concern.

(Important point of notice: I will be playing the newly graduated commander of a small crew. You are free to play as either a crew member of any rank or even a trouble making character like a criminal or something similar that gives my character a run for their money. Possibilities are endless)

Runaway royalty:

The life of a Royal was simple yet complex at the same time. They were weighed on hand and foot and never had to lift a finger to do anything provided there was a maid or servant nearby willing to do whatever task it was the royal had for them. They were expected to grow into decent, respectable leaders who could ruler a planet fairly without struggle. For many royals, they were content to follow this regularly repeating path of “destiny” that their ancestors had set them on. All but one it seems. What happens when a sheltered prince/princess takes their chance on the world beyond the walls of their castle for a chance to see the universe itself?

(Important point of notice: you will be playing the prince/princess. I’ll be playing the non Royal character they run into.)

Worlds apart:

War. War was a terrible thing that brought nations to their knees and saw many people lose their lives and freedom. Many people and aliens liked to think that all the major wars were over and done with, that they’d never have to relive the horrors that once fell upon them. To put it simply: if no one hears about bad happenings, then it’s not their problem that needs to be taken care of nor does it exist. Sadly, it does not seem to be the case for everyone. A stranger from a planet so far away that many do not believe it to exist turns up on the doorstep of an alien who is forced to realise that war could very well be just around the corner once more.

Forced:

“there’s no such thing as a bad person. Only bad choices.” Is a saying that is older than time itself. For many who are forced into a position where they have no other choice but to put their morals aside and do as they’re told, this is all too true. A space farer is captured by criminals and forced to choose between death or working as the criminals captain’s personal assistant. That means every order has to be obeyed and every rule must be followed or consequences will be dealt by force. As time passes and life go ons, the captured spacer starts to see his predicament in a different light.

(Important point of notice: I will be playing the captured spacer. You will be playing the captain.)

Forbidden romance:

aliens and humans are forbidden from associating with one another in any way that isn’t political. Whilst the two races have put aside enough of their differences to coexist in their own little pockets of space, not everyone is accepting of the idea that the two different species could live together as one, let alone ever simply just coexist peacefully together without insisting that alien planets and human planets are to be kept seperate. To trespass on the strictly human or alien occupied planets is a crime that few dare to commit. What starts out as a simple act of one sided rebellion and show of courage turns into an unanticipated adventure.

(Important point of notice, I shall be playing the alien. I’m open to this also being an alien X alien pairing.)

The hunter and the hunted:

bounty hunting was one of the few illegal professions in the galaxy that made any trouble you got into for participating in the act of killing or kidnapping someone for worth it depending on who it was you’d been given the task of tracking down. Many bounties were more profitable alive of course since it cut back on many of the legal troubles one could face if caught with a dead body. A galaxy renowned bounty hunter has been tasked with taking down one of the roughest and most wanted criminals known to man and alien with the orders to return them dead or alive. Will they succeed or fail like many before them have?

(Important point of notice: I shall be playing the criminal. You shall be playing the bounty hunter.)

Space criminals and the law:

humans and aliens have been living amongst each other side by side ever since humanity dared to venture beyond the Milky Way and made first contact with aliens. With the solar system no longer being man’s only playground other planets were quickly colonised under the new alliance between extraterrestrials and Homo sapiens. Whether you were an alien, human or a hybrid did not matter in the known galaxies. All that mattered was who you were. Not everyone took to the integration very well (there were numerous protests on both sides) but most people were willing to share in the hopes of peace. Not everyone had good intentions though……

Trouble in the alien kingdom:

the planet of (insert generic planet name here) was one of prosperity, hardship and wealth. The kingdom of (insert generic kingdom name here) was ruled by a king and a queen whose heir was betrothed to a rival planet in the hopes that a political marriage would prevent another war from happening. Only problem was that no one could see the rival planets true plans….all but one. Unfortunately no ones going to listen to a deranged commoner who probably may not even be telling the truth. What’s one to do when no one will listen?

Exile:

The wind howled as thunder crashed and shrieked all around the abandoned cargo ship. Rain pelted the metal hull, turning the ground into a cold, treacherously slippery and muddy shallow river. The ship itself had crashed into the planet countless centuries ago and was slowly being reclaimed by the environment. Plants grew from cracks in the floor as moss and vines decorated the walls. A figure sat miserably hunched in what was once the cockpit of the ship, their only shelter from the raging elements outside but not from the storm that raged inside of them. The figure leapt to their feet as the sounds of footsteps in the mud drew closer and they held their breath. Who would dare to venture out here on such a miserable night?

War of the worlds:

humans and aliens were never meant to coexist peacefully with one another. There was too much fear, Too much misinformation and too much bias on both sides for such a thing to have ever been successful. It was the humans fault that the war had started. They were the ones who’d shot down the alien ship that had been packed with specially chosen diplomats that represented each alien race known to the galaxies they dwelled in that had been on their way to earth to negotiate a truce and a plan for peace. They hadn’t even hesitated to shoot the ship full of aliens yet they’d been surprised when war had been declared on the spot. Two races. Two worlds so different yet the same fighting one another for what was either a mistake or intentional murder.

Rehab:

The UGWP alliance (unite the galaxies for the protection of all worlds and for peace alliance) portrayed themselves as calm, charismatic and kind men and women who held only the thoughts of a life together with all species living happily together. They advertised campaigns for inter species jobs, provided information to the public about human/alien interactions and encouraged diversity amongst planets. Their rehabilitation program for troublesome fellows was considered to be a god send to try and cut down on the amount of space related crimes. No one ever questioned what went on beyond the closed doors to the facility, if they did, the UGWP would have their darkest secrets revealed. Something they strove to keep under wraps. When the arrival of a particularly wild prisoner occurs, the threat of their first failure and first escaped prisoner is lurking around the corner.

(Important point of notice: in this rp idea I’d be playing said prisoner, I don’t mind if you choose to be one as well.)

Academy days:

the galaxy alliance and military defence force academy was one of the most respected training academies in the known galaxies. Men, women, aliens, humans and all of those who were in between went there to study, train and, one day if they passed the mentally, emotionally and physically gruelling years of tests, fly and be put in their own squadron. There were approximately six spots to fill on any team and the cadet who suited that spot the most would be given the title of pilot, squad leader, second in command, engineer, gunner and navigator. Each team was similar but unique in what they did. Not everyone gets along though and rivalries grow high during that delicate time between graduating and being put on a team. What happens when the top student and the lonesome outcast with a temper clashes?

Captured:

Space criminals have been around ever since advanced technology allowed others to travel and live in space as if they were living anywhere else. They’re often cunning, tricky to catch and more often than not are clever at disguising themselves whenever those wanted posters come up. It takes skill to be on the wrong side of space law and true talent to get away with it. The galaxy’s current most wanted man has finally been captured by an alliance captain and his crew. Will he beg for mercy? Will he be given a trial before being thrown into a cell to rot or will he be given a chance to turn himself around with some hard labour?

(Important point of notice: I’ll be playing the criminal for this one. You will be the alliance captain)

Enslaved:

imagine living the life of one of the most successful people on the run that could exist. Galaxies trembled at your name. You and your crew swam in wealth and the going was good. Mutiny, sadly and sometimes not sadly, exists on its own accord. One man reflected on this as he was forced to his feet. A collar attached to a chain and electromagnetic handcuffs prevented his escape as he stood for all those who cared to glance as they walked by in the market to see. No one wants to have their only life’s purpose to be to serve another……only sometimes people don’t get that choice.

(Important point of notice: I’ll be playing the slave/servant. You’ll be the master/mistress.)

Betrothed:

for as long as there has been civilisation and leaders, there has been arranged marriages. Arranged marriages, or betrothals as they were more often called, consisted of pairing two people together and making them get married in order to secure ties to another land or another planet. Political marriages benefited everyone but the married pair it always seemed. After all, you couldn’t possibly be happy being married to a complete and utter stranger? How does one who is betrothed build a life of love and prosperity when the one who bears the rings of their union is not the one who also bears their heart?

(Important point of notice: this can go two ways, either our characters are betrothed to each other or one character is betrothed. The idea has endless possibilities)

Invasion:

march 18th in the year of 6079 was the day that the aliens invaded earth. They’d been planning the take over for some time as they came prepared and easily took out Earth’s defence forces. No one knows exactly why the extraterrestrial beings from the outer worlds came to the humble blue and green planet the humans had existed on for millions of years nor did they seem to have any true intentions known other than conquering the planet and taking it for their own. This has led to the belief that all aliens must be the cruel monsters the humans stories have made them out to be. What happens when the actions of one alien puts that to the test?

(Important point of notice: I’m open to having this idea turned around and having the humans invade an alien world to take over.)

The chosen:

The galaxy alliance had chosen its newest crew to serve and protect the known galaxies. Five young cadets who’d graduated at the top of their classes and would hopefully mark the start of a new generation of spacers and heroes. The leader of the new crew has yet to be decided and tensions are high because of this. Can differences be put aside and acceptance shown? Or will nothing but chaos ensue?

The Walking wounded:

when one worked as a galaxy defence force member, they were on the frontline of everything. Every battle. Every loss. Every victory. Every struggle that the force went through they had to be there and follow the rules. You could not kill an unarmed person regardless of whether they were hostile or not. You could not turn down a plea for help even when there was reasons to suspect something was amiss. In simple terms: you simply couldn’t do anything that would make your morals be questioned. What happens when even the captain says to leave all those rules and everything you were taught by the door when faced with someone who seems to be the exception to the rule. What’s the right thing to do not by them but the entire galaxy?

Stowaway:

the galaxies were once a place of freedom and exploration. A place where you had no limits as to where you wanted to go. Now thanks to new laws, permits are required to access certain systems, quadrants and galaxies. Problem is, this permit is unobtainable by the average civilian so many have taken to learning the art of boarding another’s ship and hoping for the best. Discovery is more or less a matter of life and death. What happens when someone is unfortunate enough to be discovered?

Monster:

aliens. Aliens were terrifying beasts that were the monster in every bedtime story the humans told their children to keep them home at night. Many mothers wept when their sons and daughters applied to the space military in order to keep the extra terrestrial scum away from the galaxies they’d claimed as their own. When a human ship crashes on an alien world so far away from human civilisation it may as well not exist to the aliens and a crew member is found lost and alone by a wandering alien, will their fate be decided by a monster? Or a benevolent being?

(Important point of notice: I will be playing the alien in this scenario. I’m also open to the characters situations being swapped around so it’s the alien who crashes.)

On the run:

even on the most modern of planets, life on the lamb can be difficult. There’s authorities to avoid and even more rules to break in the game of survival. No one takes pity on those who have done wrong to the point that they have their face in the paper. Even if it’s not your fault will anyone give you shelter from the harsh cold winds of reality and a biased opinion. What happens when someone does take a chance on a poor wayfaring stranger? Will the wrong doer be turned in or given a new lease on life?

Disgraced:

when one entered the royal guard they took upon themselves an oath that bound them by blood and courage to the dedication of the protection of their king, queen and the kingdoms heirs. They were sworn to protect them from any harm whilst at the same time not allowed to use their position or power to hurt anyone else. When one breaks that oath, they are sent away in disgrace and branded as a traitor who must swear to never return. Life on the run changes people, sometimes for the better…..or for worse.

Space pirates and nobles:

space was a vast starry and endless sea that many voyaged across for the purpose of research, leisure or finding ones destiny. Like any real ocean, it was filled with dangers. The most feared of all was space pirates. Bands of blood thirsty cut throats and scandalous troublemakers whose sole pleasure in life was to steal, kill and take others prisoner against their will. Only pirates dare to do what other criminals would not. When a merchant ship is robbed by pirates what fate will befall the nobles onboard?

Healing wounds, growing love:

winter on the planet of malgor is one that is feared for its extreme weather. Snowstorms could appear out of nowhere and many a traveller had frozen to death whilst trying to make their way from one village to another. It was also a time where people were at their most vulnerable, relying on the winter harvest to feed every mouth that had been born and raised in the kingdom meant no mercy was spared for poor wayfaring strangers. When a kind soul finds a wounded outcast and decides to bring them home, they discover a threat that’s lurking just beyond the borders of their place of protection.

The knight and the heir:

royals could be spoilt. There was no denying that. A life of good food, wealth, the knowledge that they’d be pampered and weighed on hand and foot by servants was more than enough to turn even the most well mannered child into an insufferable brat. The knights tasked with the protection of the future royals knew this all too well. What happens when one particularly gruff, no nonsense knight refuses to bow to the whim of their future ruler and shows them what it means to be a true leader?

The last of a dying breed:

long ago, in a time when nobles, governments and space Pirates ruled the starry seas of space, there was a terrifying race of aliens that were considered to be the most dangerous creatures to have ever lived. When the great wars started up again due to rising tensions, the humans destroyed the planet these aliens lived on to ensure the battlefield was even. The aliens were furious at the death of an entire race and very quickly turned each and every human occupied planet into a warzone littered with their bases and encampments. Only in very small pockets of the universe does this war not exist. What happens when the last member of the species shows up on a small backwater planet?

(Important point of notice: I will be playing the alien who is the last of their kind, you are free to play as a human or the story can be made to suite a scenario where you are also an alien.)

Harden my heart:

once upon a time, there was two friends who were the best of friends that anyone could have ever seen. Two people who had each other’s backs through thick and thin. Two people who supported each other endlessly even if their morals weren’t entirely inline with each other’s. Two friends who swore to never leave each other’s sides. Alas with the time of great growing came changes, the two friends bond had severed and they’d gone their separate ways in life. What happens when they run into each other many years later?

(This idea is one open to brainstorming, anything is possible.)

captain on deck!:

captains weren’t meant to fall in love with their subordinates. They were supposed to be well refined leaders who only mingled with those of a similar status. They represented the people they worked for after all, therefore they had an image that had to be strictly maintained towards the public in order to not be disgraced in any form. Behind closed doors however…..feelings were allowed to be a little more free. Secret lovers were frowned upon but one could take the risk if they were careful. After all, the captains word was law.

yes sir!:

order.serve.fight.lead.mourn.sleep.eat.rethink your life choices and repeat. Such was the ways of a military lifestyle on a world where war seemed to be a permanent occurrence and the leaders of every world trying their best to outspite one another with their relentless attacks that it made one think of how they could improve the boring daily routine they endured each and every day. In the army, you have to be tough if you want to be a leader. You had to be charismatic, strong, cold, incapable of doing anything that would sway you to possibly turn the other cheek and let your comrades be hurt. However, even the most stoic and battle hardened leaders can get lonely despite the fact that attachments to ones comrades outside of anything but friendship are forbidden by an unspoken law.

I need you:

space is a cruel mistress to even those who are experienced with charting her waters. Space, although beautiful, is often the grave of many brave explorers, soldiers and other space faring strangers. When a stranger comes to scavenge parts from a newly crashed ship in the hopes of finding something useful, they come across a familiar face. Old feelings stir and clash with one another when the crash’s survivor awakens and finds out who their rescuer is.

Sooooo….. about those pairings. What has two stars next to it is what I’m going to play if we choose the scenario:

1: enemies to lovers or rivals.

2: **captured criminal** x prison guard or other prisoner.

3: two soldiers from seperate sides falling in love.

4: **academies bad boy/outcast** x top student

5: **low ranking ship crew member/second in command/captured space criminal** x captain.

6: **commoner/rogue/knight/street rat** x prince/princess/king/queen

7: **slave/servant** x master

8: army superior x **lower ranking soldier**

9: married person X unmarried person

10: stowaway x captain

11: nurse x **injured soldier**

12: human x **alien**

PLEASE DO NOT APPROACH ME IF:

1: YOU GHOST AT THE DROP OF A HAT.

2: YOU ARE NOT WILLING TO PUT EFFORT IN TO MEET MY REQUIREMENTS.

I’m open to discussing and potentially mixing these ideas up till we get something that we both like. If you want to learn more about a certain idea tell me the name and I shall expand on it.

The only platforms I rp on are discord,telegram and google hangouts. I will not rp on any other platform other than the ones listed. If you do not have any of those then unfortunately we cannot rp. When you reach out to me requesting for an rp via one of the below platforms In the opening message tell me what idea you liked, why you liked it, give me a little introduction about you and you must put 123 somewhere in your message so that I know you’ve read all of my post, don’t just put “hi wanna rp”. Make it interesting.

My contacts

Discord: crankypurplespacecat#6187

My telegram: Tiberionwars

My hangouts: [email protected]

I look forwards to meeting potential partners.

#oc rp #multiple paragraph #para #long term #literate #action #adventure #drama angst #original #post apocalyptic #romance #scifi #long post #submission

[potestessemagishomosexualitatis]

Tangled In Your Heartstrings: Bonus Material

I came up with a whole load of headcanons writing my witch/vampire Secret Santa fic that didn’t make the final cut, so here they are:

The World & Fae

Many different kinds of magic and magical creatures exist in this world, and have been known about by humans for all of human history.

As a rule of thumb, anything that would be illegal to do by non-magical means and/or is obviously immoral is illegal under human law. How much non-humans feel bound by this law varies.

Some magical creatures (”the undead”) were once human. This includes vampires, weres (as in werewolves, werecoyotes, etc.), ghouls and more. Others, including the fae, are distinct species.

Witches are not a separate species, but is a term for humans or undead who have been trained in the use of magic. Every person has some innate magical potential, but how much varies; nearly all humans (or former humans) need training to be able to consciously tap into their power.

Patton, Emile and Deceit are all trained witches with different specialities. Patton and Emile, as professional witches, have formal qualifications to prove they have completed their apprenticeships to a satisfactory level; Deceit has been a witch since before such qualifications existed, but did complete a similar kind of training when he first learned magic. (The apprenticeship tradition of witchcraft dates back hundreds of years.)

There are also higher qualifications for witchcraft that are equivalent to Masters degrees and doctorates. Emile is currently writing his doctoral dissertation on the uses of aura-reading in a therapeutic context.

Fae, on the other hand, are born with magical abilities, which they master during childhood. However, fae magical powers are different from what a witch can do, and are primarily nature-based. They also have a natural talent for enchanting people.

In case it wasn’t clear: Roman, like all fae in this world, is human-sized and has butterfly-type wings on his back, albeit much less fragile than a butterfly’s would be. Finding clothing that fits can be a challenge.

Most fae live in a parallel universe (called “fairyland” in common parlance) and only infrequently travel to the human world, normally preferring nature and outdoor spaces. Fae are big fans of music, art and poetry and have a bad reputation for kidnapping humans they find pretty or who have artistic talent.

Most fae don’t feel beholden to mortal law as they can usually return to fairyland to escape justice, but the rare few who choose to integrate with human society (like Roman) have to obey it.

Fae age slowly, reaching young adulthood at around 150 years old. At this point they stop ageing physically, and they cannot die of old age. However they are still vulnerable to injury, particularly by silver and iron.

Fae are strictly herbivorous, and often eat flowers.

Vampire Lore

Vampires in this universe feed off of “life energy” with blood acting as a conduit. Fresh blood retains more life energy than old blood, and human has more than animal, synthetic blood substitutes (created by magic) barely have any.

A typical healthy vampire feeding schedule is one portion of animal blood daily, supplemented by live human feeds on a weekly-to-monthly basis.

Donors can safely feed a vampire once every 4-6 weeks (it takes less than a typical blood donation) but should be monitored for signs of anaemia. Because Patton is Virgil’s thrall, Virgil can draw on his life energy more efficiently and takes less blood to be satiated, so he can feed from Patton more often (every 3 weeks).

Fae and (most) other magical creatures can be donors too. However, their magical nature can interfere with the energy transfer, making them a less predictable food source. In an emergency, a vampire could feed off another vampire, but because the energy transfer is not 100% efficient there are diminishing returns for this.

Most vampire covens will develop a network of donors that they work with, normally 2-3 per vampire member. Some donors work exclusively with one vampire, others are happy to donate to whoever is in need in a coven.

Feeding normally feels very intimate for the vampire in question, so vamps are often picky about who they will feed from and are reluctant to risk losing a donor to another vampire. In the past, vampires getting “territorial” over donors has been the starting point of several major conflicts between covens.

There are also professional services that will let vampires hire a donor. However, these have a somewhat shady reputation for pushing people to donate more often than is healthy and skimping on disease screening.

Vampires can catch and spread bloodbourne diseases! This is an area Logan is researching (see below) but the need for costly screening is why most vamps feed primarily from animal blood and donors they know well. There are clinics which offer blood screening for live donors.

Beyond feeding: a vampire at full strength can heal almost any injury in a matter of minutes, although doing so will rapidly drain their energy reserves. Traditional vampire weaknesses (e.g. stake through the heart, sunlight) can weaken them, slow healing, or cause them to temporarily discorporate but will not kill them outright.

Vampires typically live in covens of around 5-8 members who share a territory and often (but not always) a living space. Newer members are more likely to live with the coven leader while they are learning, while older ones might move out to live independently or leave to live alone/start their own coven.

Vampire homes typically have numerous adaptations to protect them from sunlight during daytime hours - minimal windows, black-out curtains and shutters, etc. These technologies have allowed beds to overtake coffins as the preferred sleeping space. (Patton’s spare room, primarily used by Logan and Deceit, has blackout curtains and shutters installed before Virgil’s arrival.)

Vampires are naturally nocturnal, but as with humans, they may awake during daylight hours for a number of reasons. Human business hours are a source of some consternation; vampire-friendly shops, libraries etc. will offer opening hours in the early evening through to around midnight or 1am to allow for nocturnal customers.

For the same reason, many vampires are self-employed or work in professions where they can set their own hours. Many covens are wealthy enough that their members do not have to find work, although many vampires enjoy having some kind of occupation to fill their time.

A larger coven also typically has at least one human living with them to help with whatever tasks vampires cannot do (e.g. answering the door during the daytime). These are often donors, for convenience reasons, but the majority of donors won’t live with a coven. Seth is a human donor who splits his time between Logan & Deceit’s coven and his own place.

Vampires are considered to have a solemn responsibility to their fledges (vampires they have turned), acting as mentors and protectors as they adjust to their new lifestyle. Turning a vampire is considered a major committent and normally involves discussion with the whole coven; life-or-death situations are the main exception to this, but even in these cases it is considered generous to intervene, not a requirement.

Backstory

Logan was a haematologist before he was a vampire. He was a grad student studying bloodbourne illnesses and ways of screening donor blood more efficiently when he attracted the attention of Deceit.

Deceit, normally wearing his “acceptable-to-mortals” disguise (the unremarkable face he shows Virgil) is a prominent and wealthy coven leader who was considering making a donation to Logan’s university. He got intrigued by Logan and wound up offering to collaborate on a project with him.

By the end of the project the two had fallen for one another. They dated for a few years while Logan was still human, and then Deceit briefly did the “how can I curse him to share my horrible undead existence?” thing before Logan basically told him to hurry up and make with the eternal youth already.

Deceit was turned in the 1920s, although he often pretends to be much older. At around 120 years old he’s unusually young to be leading his own coven already, but is by all accounts very good at it. He has not yet told me how he got his scars.

Deceit was the first witch Patton ever got to know and by exposing him to the magical world this piqued his curiosity. He began dabbling with witchcraft, trained under Emile for part of his apprenticeship, and after they became good friends Patton asked if he could stay on at the shop after qualifying.

Patton and Roman met and fell in love several years ago while Roman was visiting the mortal world, and he decided to stay for Patton. Roman was already a musician/actor in the fae world and was delighted to learn that this could count as the pesky “job” mortals insist on him having.

Virgil’s parents were anti-undead bigots; he let himself be dragged along to protests etc. because he had been raised that way and didn’t really know better. The night he died, he was unwillingly at a protest outside a pro-vampire rights speech Deceit was making.

Virgil woke up alone in a hospital to learn that his family had already disinherited him. Deceit stopped by to offer him a place in the coven but he didn’t want to hear it; however, he barely had any savings and wound up on the streets almost immediately.

Because of how traumatised he was by his turning, Virgil never properly learned how often he needed to feed or what the danger signs were. He began skipping feeds due to a combination of lack of funds and his disgust at his own vampirism, leading to him becoming dangerously malnourished by the start of the fic.

The reason that Patton’s spell accidentally replicated the thrall binding ritual is because he used life magic on a vampire, an undead creature that inherently feeds on that energy. It worked a little too well at mimicking the effects of feeding and instead magically tied a part of Patton’s life essence to Virgil’s hunger-for-life-essence.

The thrall spell was “designed” to create well-controlled servants/donors for vampires (and would therefore be considered seriously illegal to perform intentionally, since there are laws about magically controlling people), but there are variants (mentioned in chapter 5) that are intended to be more like a soul bond/magical marriage. Virgil rejected these initially because they make the bond unbreakable (even if Patton became undead) but the couple might consider them in future.

Possible Future

I reserve the right to change my mind about any/all of this if I choose to write more in this AU (and the same goes for everything else here, actually).

Roman and Virgil start dating not too long after the final chapter.

Virgil completes his witch apprenticeship with flying colours. He has a particular affinity for divination and for drawing wards.

As predicted in the fic, Patton will eventually choose to become immortal in order to stay with his family for the rest of their lives. There are ways to do this using fae magic or witchcraft but both are risky; he is far more likely to ask Virgil to turn him into a vampire.

(If I write a follow-up fic, it will probably be about this.)

Patton and Virgil will eventually open up a witchcraft shop together! It definitely has a groan-worthy pun as a name but I haven’t worked out what yet.

Patton, Virgil and Roman initially have a three-way wedding in the fae tradition, since it isn’t legal for humans to marry multiple people. They have a human one too when that is eventually legalised.

#tangled in your heartstrings #my fics #virgil sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #deceit sanders #moxiety #loceit #anaroyality #roxiality #moxivity #vampire au #witch au #magic au #fae au #fairy au

[c-is-for-circinate]

An M9 major arc breakdown: part 1

Arc 1: Who the fuck are you? (I think we might be mercenaries??): episodes 1-25

I was going to do a nice gloss over what I see as the four major arcs of the Mighty Nein story so far in one post, and then I realized that I am (*ahem*) long-winded, we’ll say.  And there’s a lot to be said!

Instead, a separate post for each arc, why not.  [I will stick links to parts 2-4 here when they’re written and posted!]

So: arc 1.  Covering 24 episodes and, according to critrole stats, about 35 in-game days, this arc manages to be both one of the longest and one of the shortest.  It covers levels 2-5, and everything from the first meeting in Trostenwald all the way through leaving Hupperdook.  It’s a lot!  And I thought a lot about trying to split it up, but the more I looked for a breaking point in these episodes, the more every possible division felt really arbitrary, and reinforced the idea that this chunk of episodes has the same theme at the center all the way through.

The arc of these episodes is specifically the progression of the Mighty Nein from not being a thing at all to maybe, sort of, somehow being a thing.  It’s full of great character moments, and lays the groundwork for, I suspect, pretty much every important thing to happen throughout the entire campaign, (with the possible exception of some of Caduceus’s stuff, but even then, I have suspicions), because Matt is Good At His Shit.  It’s also super interesting in terms of the entire show, because even though it establishes everything, the unsteady conclusion it seems to reach about who the M9 might be or might become gets almost completely (seemingly) thrown out the window by the very next arc--but more about that in the next arc’s post.

In this arc I think we need to take just a moment to get meta in terms of players vs characters, because this is the one part of the story so far where that division is actually, actively important.  There’s two big reasons for that.  One, the players are still learning who their own characters are, even as the characters are learning each other.  Two, there is one single, central, and encompassingly important fact that the players all know that the characters don’t, and resolving that disconnect shapes the tone of this entire arc.

The members of the Mighty Nein are going to be together for a very long and very epic journey.  It’s a fact.  Even if individual characters die or choose to leave, the group itself is destined for something big, because everybody at that table has every intention of playing straight through to level 20 all over again.  What’s more, everybody at that table is already family in nearly every real-life way that matters.  The audience knows that this group is going to be something special, expects them to become family in their own right before they’ve even met.  The DM knows.  The world itself probably knows, in-game--a group of strangers meet in Trostenwald and somewhere on her celestial plane, the Raven Queen is probably watching a bunch of fate-threads tangle together and make a mess of her pretty fate tapestry all over again.  The only people who don’t know how meaningful this group is going to be, to the world or to its own members, are the characters themselves.

And that leads to a fascinating dynamic, where these characters run into each other in Trostenwald, and then stay together for reasons even they can’t necessarily fully explain.  They never sit down and say, “okay, let’s be mercenaries together”--they get kicked out of Trostenwald and say, “I guess let’s go to Zadash together, maybe?”, and then they just...never break up.  The number one question for the whole first chunk of this arc is, “Why am I even with these assholes?”  Sure, the easy answer is, “because the players have decided the characters are going to be,” but that’s boring and kind of besides the point.  Yes the players have decided that the characters are going to be together--and that creates a story where the characters and the players both have to figure out why as they go along.

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The way this plays out is different for each character, but there are some commonalities:

Caleb and Nott both have long-term goals, and even though neither of them knows it at first, they both have the same long-term goal: somehow get back to the way the world used to be.   The trouble is, this is a really distant goal for both of them, something that requires the kind of intense magic they don’t understand and barely even believe in.  Their short-term goals are a much more basic ‘survive and also keep this other person alive long enough to figure out how to achieve that long-term goal’, and that’s what they say they’ve signed up with the rest of the group for.  It’s a relatively simple answer that ends up getting ever more complicated in reality.

Caleb and Nott’s relationships with the group actually parallel each other a lot at this early stage, and it isn’t just because they come as a prepackaged duo.  Both of their long-term goals have an undercurrent of desperate loneliness that they’ve each been living with since their lives fell apart.  In theory, getting what they’re after will help fix that one way or another--but in the mean time, suddenly they’re surrounded by people, and they can’t help but care.  They just also don’t trust the rest of the group, because how do you trust people at all, ever?  Nobody’s been particularly kind to either of them since everything went to shit, and if the universe had any kindness to begin with it never would’ve happened in the first place.  But there’s this undercurrent of...maybe, if they learned to love and trust this group, they’d find out they don’t need what they’re trying to get to begin with, because they’ve already got the secure love and acceptance they’re really craving.  Maybe.  Certainly neither of them have started to figure that out yet.  They can barely admit to liking their compatriots at all.

What’s even more tricky is that neither of them actually have much of a plan for getting from their short-term survival goals towards their long-term goals.  Nott literally doesn’t know how Caleb could turn her back into a halfling--she just has faith that he can, if he gets powerful enough, and it leads to things like the stolen letter for an academy Caleb would not set foot in again for all the love or money in the world.  Caleb is so bad at bridging the gap between what’s in front of him in this world right now, and the big nebulous world-shattering Thing he wants to eventually achieve.  After all, what’s in front of Caleb right now doesn’t matter, or it won’t once he twists the whole world into a new shape anyway--except that it is in front of him right now, and needs to be survived and dealt with, somehow, and that’s distracting in its own right.  So the whole first arc is full of moments like Caleb trying to take the spell scroll and Nott trying to steal Fjord’s letter, where they’re grabbing at an apparent immediate step towards their long-term goals at the expense of the people around them, and maybe even to the detriment of those ultimate aims.

Basically, for Caleb and Nott, being with this group is supposed to be a means to an end--but they don’t really know how being with this group is going to help them achieve that end, they’re just...pretty sure it will.  Somehow.  They’re definitely eating better now, and maybe if Caleb gets into that library it’ll help, or something, maybe, he hopes.  The unspoken question for Caleb and Nott both, as Arc 1 progresses, is--do they actually think being with the group is going to help them achieve those all-important goals, or do they just like being here?  Nott will follow Caleb anywhere, because he’s her way out of this goblin life, but she doesn’t encourage him to leave to progress somewhere else.  Caleb argues with himself when he’s alone, but he always stays in the end.  Is it practicality?  Is there a plan?  Or did they just accidentally fall in with a group of people they actually like, and the group’s constant shenanigans are a useful distraction from having to admit what they're apparently willing to sacrifice for the sake of being here rather than alone?

Fjord and Jester, meanwhile, both claim to have long-term goals, but they sure don’t show any indication that they care about pursuing them.  Which makes sense, because Jester and Fjord show up in Trostenwald with personal quests that are devoted to a very nebulous, hypothetical sort of belonging (contrast with Caleb and Nott, who want to belong in very specific ways, in places they once already lived).  Their worlds have both fallen apart, too, but far more recently and a little less dramatically.  They’re not looking to get back to what they once had, they’re looking to replace it.

Or, to be more specific: Fjord’s entire adult life thus far has been defined by his job.  Being a sailor wasn’t just his profession, it was his identity.  It’s what he did; it’s where he lived; it’s where he found the only person who ever really cared about him or called him family; it’s where he found his self-worth and his social worth, the first and only place he ever felt valuable to anyone else in the community or the world at large.  Heading up to the Soltryce Academy to figure out what’s up with this sword is about finding a whole new self, with a new purpose, a new job, a new person who can tell him what he’s good at and good for and where he belongs now.

Jester’s entire life has been defined by her mom.  Marion is her entire world.  Jester literally doesn’t know anybody outside the Lavish Chateau, and aside from the Traveller, the few people who do know she exists at all are servants or coworkers of her mother.  Jester’s world is tiny, with Marion at the center of it.  If Fjord’s self-worth is caught up in his job and what he does, Jester’s is entirely determined by making people joyful and happy, and the only two people she’s ever really had the chance to please in that way are her mother and the Traveler.  So she’s looking for her other parent, to replace the one thing she’s always had right there.

In many ways, the particulars of what Fjord and Jester are pursuing don’t actually matter that much.  Fjord doesn’t need the Soltryce to give him a job or a purpose.  He jumps headfirst into the mercenary business almost overnight; they’ve been in Zadash less than a week before he’s chatting with the Gentleman about professional networking like a man who’s about to pull out his company business cards.  Jester doesn’t need a dad, she just needs people to love her and be delighted by her presence.  It turns out that this team of people just so happens to address that core need for both of them, and that’s enough for Jester and Fjord.  They’re in this head first.

The thing about Fjord and Jester is, though, neither of them are asking any questions about the long term either.  Because rolling with the Mighty Nein is hitting all the right buttons to get at the root of what they need, they’re both super blase about letting certain details go without question.  Why does Fjord have these new powers he’s now starting to understand?  What kind of relationship does Jester actually want with a parent?  And where does the rest of the group see this whole situation going in the next weeks, months, years?  Jester and Fjord aren’t asking--and that makes sense too, because if they’re not asking, then they don’t have to face the answers.  If Fjord doesn’t ever make it to Soltryce, nobody can tell him he’s not good enough, and if Jester never quite gets around to meeting her father, she doesn’t have to find out why he never came back.  If they don’t ask questions about the group, maybe nobody will ever remember to leave.

Beau and Molly would be so pissed at being grouped together here, which is not actually why I did it, but is a nice additional nuance.  (Part of why they hate each other so much is because they’ve got a lot in common deep down--they both care very deeply and project an image of not caring very much at all, and it pisses both of them off constantly.)  The truth is, Beau and Molly are both with the Mighty Nein because they literally have nowhere else to go.   Caleb and Nott are trying to regain their old lives; Fjord and Jester are trying to replace their old lives; but Molly and Beau don’t really have lives besides this, or at least not lives they’d admit to.

These two are the closest thing to Professional Criminals in the group when it all gets started--Nott and Caleb might steal and con to survive, but for Beau and Molly it’s been an actual job, with coworkers and workplace etiquette, and bigger heists with full crews arguably similar to the M9 in the past.  The circus was Molly’s everything and it got smashed to bits within the first four episodes, but the core Mollymauk of it all means that his life fundamentally doesn’t change with its loss.  He is still on the road skipping from place to place, living out of bedrolls and carts and inns if there’s good luck; he’s still slinging bullshit and the odd con, doing a good turn when he can and keeping an eye out for coin; he’s still messing around with a couple of swords, trying not to get beat up or thrown in jail or run out of town, killing a bit when necessary; he’s still embedded in the middle of a group of walking disaster weirdos full of Issues and interpersonal conflict who somehow have to live together and rely on each other with all their broken bits and strangeness.  Beau played local contact for every reasonably-sized crew of criminals to come through Kamordah, and not a one of them ever kept her around for the long haul, but she knows seedy underbellies and she knows how to punch people for pay and she knows about honor among thieves and she knows how to trust fundamentally untrustworthy people just exactly as far as she can throw them.

So just the basic everyday operation of being part of the Mighty Nein, the important job skills and general lifestyle, is more in line with what Beau and Molly have already been doing than it is for anyone else in the group.  There’s also less conflict with their overarching long-term life goals.  Neither of them have any, besides ‘keep doing this as long as I can’.  I don’t think either Molly or Beau have any real vision of what a future even looks like, Beau because she’s young and too busy rebelling against to think about building towards, Molly because with no real past he barely even has a concept of change or becoming anything other than what he is.  The most either of them can really picture would be a life they don’t want: the Proper Lionett Daughter or Lucien Whoever-The-Fuck.  Those are nightmare scenario lives that belong to other people, and Beau and Molly will run from them literally as far and as fast as they can.

While Caleb and Nott are avoiding the question of “is this group really going to help me get what I want?” (because the answer might mean they should leave, and they want to stay); and Fjord and Jester are avoiding the question of “should I actually try to find the thing I came looking for in the first place?” (because real answers are so much scarier than unsolved questions); Beau and Molly are determinedly avoiding the high school guidance counselor question question of “where do you see yourself in five years?”.  They have no long-term plans, and neither of them want any.  What they’ve got going on right here is good.  They don’t have to be alone (which Beau has been all her life, and Molly has never been once, and they both want so badly to avoid).  They get to stay in constant motion, running and fighting and drinking and earning money and occasionally experimenting with illegal ethereal-plane-enhancing substances, and that’s just fine.

Yasha doesn’t quite fit in with anyone else because Yasha is gone so damn much, but also because she doesn’t quite match any of the categories.  Her whole life fell apart, just like practically everyone else’s, but she’s not trying to get it back, and she’s not trying to replace it.  And Yasha does have somewhere else to be, a path she thinks maybe she ought to be following if she could just figure out where it is.  She keeps coming back because Molly is the closest thing she has to family; she keeps coming back because fate keeps bumping her into the group and saying she should; she keeps coming back because it’s good coin and easy killing-things work and they’ll have her; she keeps coming back because she likes them, because Caleb is awkward with people but lends her his cat, because Jester is bright and smiling and also loves flowers, because Beau fights next to her and Fjord respects her and Nott gave her flowers once, and that matters.

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As Arc 1 progresses, as the players get to know their characters better and the characters get to know each other, they begin to collectively answer “Why am I with this group?” with another question: “Just what is this group, anyway?”.  It’s a little out of order and a little bit of a mess, just like the party itself, just like life, but the truth is that the members of the Nein find themselves more or less attached to this merry little band before they’ve even really defined what said band is.  The characters become a group by accident, by fate, by will of the players, because they’re all desperate for things and avoiding things and because why not.  Many decisions about what kind of group they become, though, are a lot more deliberate.  

‘Mercenary’ is the first thing they pick up, and they specifically don’t choose it for themselves.  (It’s also the first thing they lose when the next arc starts, or maybe at the very end of this one.)  They roll into Allfield in the middle of a gnoll attack, and Bryce offers cash for gnoll ears before they can even ask ‘what’s in it for us?’.  They already had weapons in hand to deal with the threat--it’s impossible to say what the team would’ve done without that offer, and they were all broke as fuck and badly in need of money anyway--but they didn’t present themselves as swords-for-hire until someone was already asking to hire them.

Allfield teaches them that they can be mercenaries (and gives them an excuse to stay as a group), while Zadash begins to teach them what kind of mercenaries they want to be.  It becomes very clear very quickly that this group does not like institutions of power (something I’ve already written about at length).  They do a single job for the crownsguard and then immediately turn around and start working with back-tavern insurgents and underground smugglers.  While their individual opinions may vary, collectively they do Not Like The Empire.

They also establish themselves as a group that does not trust in general, either the outside world or each other--and furthermore, a group that will push and investigate and uncover answers every time a mystery pops up.  They don’t take the Knights of Requital at face value, they investigate around the back end; they track down the Gentleman just because he’s there.  They demand answers from each other, from Molly baiting a trap to catch Nott stealing from Fjord to the whole group teaming up to demand ‘Lucien’ explain himself.  Caleb doesn’t trust Callie, and Beau doesn’t trust Caleb, and nobody trusts Fjord’s stone-swallowing, and there’s no resolution, only more questions.

Likewise, they are not trustworthy.  While they take jobs and generally deliver on what they pay for, they also ad-lib and change direction for their own benefit, and their loyalty to their employers is debatable at best.  The argument over the spell scrolls in the High Richter’s house is a major division at the time, but by the time they’re clearing out necromancy for the Gentleman, nobody really sides against stealing the journal or Yasha’s sword.  They just come up with a plan together to cheat the Gentleman effectively.  When they clear out the merrow in his safehouse in the swamp, they have no problem taking as much of his stuff as they can.  They are out for themselves, and the jobs they take are a means to their own ends, not particularly important in and of themselves.

The M9 feel very small, as a group, in the face of a world that’s very big, and we see that tie back in with the past two points over and over again.  So much of the Zadash part of the arc involves the stirrings and edges of the war with Xhorhas, and the Nein’s almost instant response of, okay, we want to stay as FAR FROM THAT AS POSSIBLE.  The major powers of the world are big enough to crush them, and they are afraid of that--but, the attitude seems to go, the major powers of the world are also big enough to miss noticing them, and that matters too.  They steal the dodecahedron and disappear off into the shadows because they know it means something huge, and that’s scary, and therefore grabbing this piece of it might somehow protect them or the world in the long run.  They’re able to do it because they’re small, because in this clash of international titans they’re still nobody.

Lastly, this group desperately wants to be doing something moral, they just don’t necessarily know how.  They debate over whether the Knights of Requital are good guys, over whether they should help the crown, over the right thing to do with the Krynn assassin.  They are so much more comfortable working for the Gentleman, who’s a criminal right there on the surface but doesn’t appear to be actively hurting anybody, than assisting the local law.  Even when it’s not a job, or maybe even more when it’s not a job, they find themselves going out of their way to be good people: rescuing Kiri, helping Callie, finding ways to help Horace and Dolan after the attack on the spire explodes everything.  For a group of self-proclaimed mercenaries, there’s a constant undercurrent of...should we be doing this?  Is this the right thing to do?  Should we totally betray our employers because that’s the right thing to do?  They’re not loyal to anybody in particular, except maybe each other, but they’re struggling to find some kind of ideal or guiding principle to be loyal to.

All of this culminates in Hupperdook.  The group is finally unbending a little, coming to trust each other that little bit more.  Beau talks about her childhood, and Caleb says Astrid’s name, and Nott says Yeza’s, and Fjord talks about the orphanage where he grew up.  They go down into a prison to fight a whirling death-robot, and it’s sort of because Rissa’s dad promised them a reward but also sort of because Rissa is Theirs Now, and more than anything it’s to save the parents of a bunch of penniless near-orphans.  It’s a way to say fuck you! to the Imperial system; it’s a way to combine two jobs at once for their own purposes.  It is above all a very new-feeling exploration of the idea that, small or not, they can in fact actually make a meaningful difference in the world.  They have power, and that power can be used for good.  

It’s by far the least mercenary-like job they’ve taken.  Between the bail money they pay for the Schuesters and the additional cash they leave with them to take care of Kiri, they probably spend half as much on the whole endeavor as that new fancy crossbow was worth to begin with.  They did something good, and it feels better and more right than all their fumbling maybes.

Aside from Trostenwald, where crisis came to them and the whole story was about getting themselves out of trouble, Allfield and Hupperdook very much bookend this arc, and that makes a lot of sense, because there’s a very similar feeling to both jobs.  They’ve done something dangerous, and saved lives, and helped people--regular, good people who hadn’t hurt anyone to get into the situations they were in.  They made some profit doing it.  Those things are not mutually exclusive, and maybe, maybe they can build something of a career path out of finding the places where they intersect.

This first arc doesn’t exactly conclude--because with an ongoing show like this, nothing ever quite concludes--so much as it reaches a point where many of its primary themes and issues begin to look as though they could, in theory, someday be resolved.  There’s a visible path ahead that combines altruism and self-interest.  The group members are talking to each other, slowly and carefully.  There are still a lot of unanswered questions about who everyone is and what they want, but it seems like the group might just be heading in a direction towards those questions at least eventually getting asked.

It’s maybe the most optimistic place the group’s been in so far, which is of course why this is the point where everything in the whole world comes crashing down--but that’s for the next arc.

#critical role #driveby meta attack #mighty nein #campaign 2 spoilers #mostly only for the first block of episodes

[aracellianton]

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Bacterial Vaginosis On Wet Prep

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#Bacterial Vaginosis Home Remedy Coconut Oil Stupendous Ideas #Bacterial Vaginosis Keeps Returning Dir

[thebluelemontree]

Would you want a sandor pov? In any case what would you expect of his internal monologue and what would you want to have revealed about him.

I do, and I don’t.  Let me start with why don’t.  I like a bit of mystery.  I like that it takes time and attention to detail to figure Sandor out.  Part of the fun for me was learning his tells, comparing his words versus his actions, then sifting through how he may be perceived by the biases of each POV he appears in.  That has sparked so many stimulating conversations I’ve had the pleasure of being in.  Different people contributing their observations until we have a pretty comprehensive, but still unfinished, portrait of the guy.  Sure, you can do that with a POV too, but as a fandom experience, not having Sandor’s POV has left a lot of room for some really thoughtful and intriguing headcanons.  Exploring those possibilities has been a lot of fun, especially with other people I enjoy talking to.  

I would love to know more about his family history in his own words, especially about his sister.  We don’t know anything about her or how her death affected Sandor.  It could have been another monumental event in his life, or he could have been barely old enough to remember much about her.  Not that I’m holding my breath on this one ever being mentioned considering GRRM’s track record, but did he know his mother?  If so, what does he remember about her before she died?  I’d also like to know precisely where his personal hostility toward Tyrion comes from.  He probably heard a twisted and incriminating version of the Tysha incident from Cersei (similar to the one LF told Sansa) since he was her shield during his formative teen years and that’s why he’s so guilt-stricken to think he abandoned Sansa to a hellish fate.  That’s my guess, but none of that has been confirmed for sure.  There’s smaller stuff like what he did during the Greyjoy rebellion, what it was like being Cersei’s shield, what he thought of Jaime or Tywin, etc.  I definitely want to know about his time with the Elder Brother and their relationship.  Thankfully though, none of this requires a Sandor POV.  He could just tell us in someone else’s POV.  Assuming he stays on his current trajectory, I think Sandor will open up more as he becomes more comfortable with peopling.  

Hypothetically speaking, I think his POV would be a pretty bleak place to be most of the time.  Definitely not dull though.  An extremely biased and exaggerated perspective no doubt.  He sees what he expects to see, so he’s never wrong or disappointed.  I’m not sure seeing inside his head would necessarily do him any favors in the sympathy department, but that’s debatable.  Most of his conscious thoughts would be a more uncensored version of all the cynical, blunt, and judgemental stuff he already says.  Everyone and everything would be some combination of stupid, weak, phony, pompous, ingratiating, hypocritical… you get the idea.  Sure he’d be right sometimes, but Sandor has convinced himself that the world is divided into butchers and meat, and you don’t want to be the meat.  I’m not sure even his fans would enjoy reading his unfavorable opinions on Robb, Eddard, or especially Mycah as he was run down.  Sandor would probably be actively thinking some pretty callous thoughts to emotionally distance himself from the victim and become indifferent to the act.  If you thought some readers were too unforgiving of Sandor now, I can only imagine how much more damning a POV recount would look.  It would be a lot harder to take a step back and judge Sandor fairly if we were privy to every cold and unempathetic thought in his head.  Not impossible because he’d still be the same character, but just harder.  So much of his attitude is him desperately trying to run from his own trauma and helplessness by refusing to identify with the helpless, thus being unable to empathize.  If early AGOT Sandor had a POV, it would get to a point where the difference between genuinely not caring about human life (like Gregor) and talking yourself into believing that you don’t care about human life starts to look indistinguishable when it yields results like being okay with obeying an order to kill a defenseless peasant kid.  I know he was on a bad path at the beginning and I think I have a pretty good idea about his thought process already.  I don’t really want to be distracted by so much darkness, because I’d rather focus on what he chooses to do in spite of those professed beliefs instead.  That’s where the deeper truth is.  I think it helps that a good portion of his story is told through Sansa’s eyes.  She looks at him with far more understanding and fairness than he does himself.  No one judges Sandor more harshly than Sandor.    

What would be interesting to see is signs of his subconscious manifesting itself, like in dreams or nightmares.  Oh boy, would I love to know if he has dreams that parallel Sansa’s!  Or his unadulterated gut reactions to things he was not prepared for.  Brief flashes of things he might have hoped for in a different life.  A home.  A wife.  Things from the past involving family members, both good and bad.  Contemplations on his conversations with the little bird and all ensuing conflicted feelings.  Anything regarding Sansa would be a hot mess.  On the one hand, he’d be stewing on how she frustrates him with her world view.  On the other, he’d feel attachment and a growing loyalty to the one person that took his side and seems to live up to that world view.  He’d be whipping back and forth between craving that connection and fiercely trying to dislodge her from his brain so she can stop making him feel all these feels.      

He’s very emotionally immature.  I think he’d lack much of the language to process what he’s feeling toward her at least with more positive words.  He knows he’d kill for her, die for her, and not lie to her.  He feels a sense of loyalty and a need to protect her, but he would only know how to express that through the language of violence that he’s accustomed to.  But how to make sense of what’s underneath that?  That’s where his drunken internal monolog would be a lot of fun to read through.  He’s way less inhibited and controlled.  We’d probably get a lot of “little bird this” and “little bird that.”  I wouldn’t be surprised if it got a little foolish and sappy with some idealized song imagery.  While he may insult her for her courtesies, there’s also the other part of him that thinks she’s a real “proper little lady,” sweet, kind, and respectable.  Then he’d be angrily chastising himself when his attempts to outwardly express the softer feelings of love come off as rough handling, but really he’s clumsy and inept like a bull in a china shop.  I’m just using the term “love” here to simplify a set of feelings that perhaps would be considered the building blocks of love, but maybe not a consciously thought of and felt in totality as love.  He doesn’t know how to ask for, receive, and reciprocate intimacy the right way.  His thoughts might come across as those of a very needy child when he wants her attention.  As she begins to grow more womanly, his physical attraction is something easier to understand, but those feelings also embarrass him as they are inappropriate due to her youth, social status, and the high pedestal he’s placed her on.  Those thoughts would pop up occasionally before being promptly stomped down with shame and self-loathing.  All of this would be mixed in with Sandor’s uncontrolled anger, PTSD, and fear of vulnerability.  That last one would be a big feature of his internal conflict:  you can’t have intimacy and connection without being vulnerable with another person.     

#valyrianscrolls #sandor clegane meta #sandor clegane #sansa stark #sansan meta #sandor POV #sorry so late with this #with the holiday weekend coming I worked through my lunch breaks #then ended up crashing when I got home #anonymous

[siriuslycollins-blog]

Single Dad Jared Headcanons

1992-1999

- becoming a father was not something on jared’s to-do list, he was still 20 years old (she was born early in the year) but he thought everything would okay if he had the mother of the child on the parenthood journey with him

but everything wasn’t okay

the mother died shortly after delivery

he was heartbroken and now here he is, a 20 year old struggling actor, and now father to a newborn daughter

- plans of moving to new york are now shot as he has to take care of a baby

speaking of

instead he now travels between louisiana and california for auditions

relying on his mom and shannon to watch her while he’s away until he has enough money to rent an apartment so they could move there.

- jared gets work sometime in 1992 and he’s so happy he could cry. finally he has just enough money to get a babysitter and to fly shannon out to la

- he gets minor roles for about a year until my so called life

by now she’s two years old, and already in daycare

 the cast and crew always ask about her (let’s give her a name and call her kaela)

 which makes him to bring her to set sometimes

they all love her and fawn over her

 during his break he reads to her and watches sesame street with her

- by 1995, jared’s career is on full steam and he’s getting roles left and right, eventually landing a movie role.

which means more money coming in and he can finally afford a house 

 he can take kaela to toys r us and buy her plenty of barbie dolls and other stuff

- he finally feels like he’s able to give his daughter the life she deserves

- maybe this dad thing isn’t so hard after all, he’s managed for three years with no accidents

- until he has to leave to prepare and film for prefontaine 

shannon takes care of kaela while he’s away

 which isn’t so bad. he’s like a second father to her

but kaela still misses her father and is too young to understand why jared is away all the time

constance visits also; she misses her grandbaby

constance may or not be pressuring shannon about having kids of his own after he sees him drawing in chalk in the driveway one day

- jared and kaela preparing for “big girl school��

she loves picking out her backpack and lunch box

he knows that kaela only needs the 24 pack of crayola crayons but 64 pack WITH THE SHARPENER IN THE BACK is on the shelf above, so he gets the 64 pack

who wouldn’t want to be friends with the kid who has the 64 pack?

- jared being emotional as he drops her off

he obviously sticks out like a sore thumb

every father is either dressed in khakis or in expensive suits with shiny black shoes and gold watches with gelled back hair or clean haircuts

and here’s jared with his longish hair, wearing the t-shirt he wore to bed last night and ripped jeans. he can already tell he won’t have anything in common with any of the parents here

maybe private school wasn’t such a good idea, but it was the school closest to the house

- jared gets bored while kaela’s at school and he doesn’t know what to do with himself

the house is way too quiet

grocery shopping isn’t all that fun without her

neither is cleaning the house

he can’t even get through the day without her, how is he supposed to get through 12 YEARS?

- he gets used to it though when he hears kaela talking about her new friends during dinner

- second grade is easier as he has stuff to do for thirty seconds to mars

they have a routine going

although jared can’t drop her off anymore and kaela now has to take the school bus

he’s a little uncomfortable because now people other than his bandmates and family and friends know where he lives

 it also teaches kaela how to be a little more independent and also about time management, so a win-win.

2000-2010

- kaela’s growing up and she’s starting to form an identity outside of jared

she has her group of friends and interests

kaela is definitely a harry potter fan

jared takes her to see the movies

thirty seconds to mars is becoming more successful in the rock world

- kaela is literally growing up right in front of his eyes

she looks just like her mother

oh god, kaela needs a mother

is he ready to start dating again?

he can’t rely on his mom for everything

- kaela starts middle school and jared is FREAKING OUT

valentine’s day in middle school is his worst nightmare

why does she have so many cards from boys???

shannon, solon, and matt teasing him about it

him glaring at any boy who stares at her for too long

- at this point jared is dating cameron diaz 

when jared introduces them, kaela doesn’t know what to do

she’s happy for him, and she likes cam a lot but she’s so used to it just being the two of them it feels... odd

they do get along though

kaela being there for jared when he and cameron breaks up

- jared now considers middle school as a cake walk compared to high school

he has to restrain himself from choking fans his daughter’s age when they comment about her

 of course the media also notices how stunning the leto girl is becoming

even more valentine’s day cards from boys

yes, my daughter is very pretty now stop staring at her, boy in front of us in the trader joe’s checkout line

- just because jared’s easy going in his interviews doesn’t mean he’ll be easy going on the guy trying to take his daughter away from him

okay, maybe not take her away from him, more like date

 he’s definitely a chaperone on dates

if jared’s not available then shannon goes

- kaela having her first boyfriend is very emotional for jared

he’s jared’s worst nightmare, the stereotypical l.a. rich kid. seriously kaela, wtf are you thinking?

he’s lowkey manipulative af (let’s call him brandon)

like that time kaela got asked to promote a clothing line. jared was happy for her, brandon, not so much

thankfully kaela dumped him before senior year

- speaking of senior year

kaela is busier than ever. she’s filling out college applications and going to college interviews every time he turns around

jared doesn’t have to pay schools to get kaela a spot in school unlike certain celeb parents. kaela works for everything she has, thank you very much

- when graduation is around the corner, he’s an emotional wreck

invitations have been sent

kaela already has a school picked out, louisiana state university to be exact

it’s also closer to constance if she needs to get away sometimes

and also closer to her mom’s side (jared knows about kaela contacting relatives from her mom’s side, and he’s happy that his daughter is getting to know them)

- jared and shannon almost fighting other parents to get the perfect shots of their kids 

did i forget to mention that kaela’s valedictorian?

jared being so incredibly proud of his little girl who is not a little girl anymore

 hearing his daughter’s full name and seeing her walk across the stage brings him to tears

her mom would be so proud

he knows that kaela’ s going to be successful no matter what she chooses to do in life

present

- kaela is absolutely stunning; she’s in her 20s now and the media always do those transformation things complete with slideshows 

she chose a profession that she loves and is passionate about

jared, shannon, constance and everyone else are so proud of her

it requires her to travel A LOT so jared has a hard time keeping track but they talk/facetime every week

kaela being in the city of angels video and it also showed pictures and videos of her growing up 

kaela being best friends with chloe since jared introduced them

-kaela is also instagram goals

she’s friends with plenty of celebs and has a good following on social media

kaela still has her own life and career that’s not in the entertainment industry

but damn does she know how to take a good selfie

- kaela helping her uncle with his coffee company

she works pop up shops around the country if she’s able to do it

kaela and shannon are partners in crime

they also drum together too

shannon being a Proud Uncle

is this really the same kid who he used to push on the swing sets and watch disney movies with?

- no matter how old kaela gets, she’s always gonna be jared’s little girl. 

this was made with @echelongaga

#jared leto x daughter #jared leto imagine #oc in the making? probably i'm not sure yet #jared leto

[seyaryminamoto]

Rejoice! Long-Winded Anon is here with another question. You have dedicated a lot of time and chapter space developing the side characters more than many fics usually would because most authors focus much more on the main characters, bending or even sacrificing other in-universe elements to fit their preferred vision, as shipping fics often do. But you take much more care writing other characters. Was that planned? Or spontaneous in the flow of plotting and world building?

On great measure it’s spontaneous, but it’s mainly because the story has required it. I will say, I did have a lot of canon characters presence when the story started out. Often readers seemed to be just thrilled to recognize old characters in new roles, and I had been working, up until then, with the notion that the more canon characters I used, the happier I’d keep everyone, pretty much.

So, all the way back in the first arc we had Shoji, a one-time character in canon, from the Headband, taking up a recurring role in the story as clerk in the Grand Royal Dome. Likewise, Song was a one-time canon character and she took on a role that turned her into a constant presence in the story, with her own development and relationships with the main characters. Smellerbee has only featured for one chapter, but she was there anyhow. Piandao trains Sokka, same role he had in canon, but for a longer period of time and eventually vanishes for yet-to-be-revealed plot reasons. Chan and Ruon Jian had roles too, Chan a relatively brief one so far, Ruon Jian a constant but background role nonetheless: marrying Mai off to a completely unknown character could have been an easier way out, but offering a one-time canon character further relevance actually might intrigue certain readers, I guessed. There’s June’s very controversial role from early on in the story too, Toph’s first sponsor is the same guy who was hired by her parents to track her down in canon, Xin Fu. Jet’s initial appearance is brief, even if his hypnosis might have helped many readers guess he’d come back for more eventually. Even Haru, who yes, is relevant in canon but he only shows up in a few episodes regardless, gets a bigger role here as Ty Lee’s gladiator. The hammer-wielding earthbender from Zuko Alone? He’s the Twin Hammer, the earthbender Sokka fights in Garsai’s Arena, and the first earthbender he defeats.

Yeah, there were lots of less important characters even at the early stages of the story, and several OCs who didn’t amount to much. Smellerbee’s sponsor? Literally got his name from a brand of eggrolls that they used to sell in my country XD Hosang bite-sized eggrolls were so nice… and as I needed a name, that came to mind and he was her sponsor. The Spawn of the Volcano is also an OC, as is the Hallowed Rock and frankly nearly every gladiator who’s not easily identifiable. But many unfamiliar and new characters, like Kuan, Aonu and Renzhi, Kino, Tiang, Seethus, the homeless people Azula helps, Haiyan and Yang, the entirety of the Blue Pack, Hina, most gladiators introduced after Haru…? Practically all of them are outright OCs, and that’s because I really felt I would have been stretching believability past an excessive point if somehow I kept choosing to repurpose characters who had showed up in canon at some point.

To put things simply… Miyuki and the Herbalist couldn’t have showed up if I didn’t have Sokka and Azula traveling to the Herbalist Institute. Aunt Wu as well, along with Meng, couldn’t have showed up believably in the story if they didn’t go to Makapu. Even Jeong Jeong is very deliberately operating in the northwestern Earth Kingdom because that is where Aang finds him in canon. If I’d featured them in locations that were completely incompatible with who they were established to be in canon, I would have been hurting the story rather than enriching it.

So I can’t, for instance, have Onji and Hide and Shoji and basically all of Aang’s classmates from the Headband moving to the Capital when they all lived in an island in the outskirts of the Fire Nation, because yeah, maybe some would have moved away (like Shoji did)! But would they all travel and move away to the same places? Would they all choose professions that coincidentally would align with whatever Sokka and Azula are up to at the moment, so that they’re relevant to the story somehow? Seems like a stretch, doesn’t it?

I really think I just reached a point where I couldn’t stretch believability so far without risking the story’s integrity. I couldn’t just make Hide Azula’s Guard Captain, for example, when all logic dictates that there should be lots of competent firebenders and soldiers in the Fire Nation who would be far more suited for the role than a completely common boy who showed no special aptitudes in canon other than being an annoying teacher’s pet. Hide apparently would have grown to be in the military, says the Wikia, but how many soldiers does the Fire Nation military have? Soooo many… and why would we not get to know them? Why should we only stick to the ones we met through canon, when there are already so few of those  and most of them wouldn’t suit the role of Azula’s Guard Captain anyhow?

That logic steered me towards OCs over canon characters in the later stages of the story. Kino, Aonu, Renzhi, Yang, Haiyan, the entire Blue Pack, Hina, Rhone, Seethus… they’re all new characters, but as long as they fit in the roles the story needs them to fulfill, there’s no real reason for them to feel out of place the way they could if I was forcing them in, the way some writers do with overpowered OCs who break all logic in the setting they’re written into. Rhone, in particular, received far from a warm welcome when I introduced his character, but his character is an answer to a question canon brought up but didn’t really address at all: Yon Rha confirmed in the Southern Raiders that there WAS a leak of information in the South Pole that enabled them to figure out there was one last waterbender there. Canon never addressed this. I’m not going to pretend my way of addressing it is the one way to go… but it’s something. Likewise, Sokka’s increasing popularity would only logically result in him developing a fanclub like the one we saw for Suki early on in the story: why should the characters in that fanclub be anyone we already knew? There are so many people living in the Capital, lots of them unknown in canon, but they’re there. Is it more reasonable for common people who live in a city to be part of this club, or for people like, I don’t know, Star, to move all the way from Ba Sing Se only to fawn all over Sokka in the Fire Nation Capital? Which option makes more sense, ultimately?

And that’s really where my logic went in the end. ATLA did a decent job at showing us the common, ordinary folk who make a living in their world despite the chaotic war. Those are the people Aang helped often, and they didn’t all need some insanely exaggerated reason to be where they were, or to be who they were. Had I dragged them out of their natural living spaces, like for instance making Jin into a gladiator? It would have been ridiculous to no end. Her role and story work in Gladiator because it feels plausible within what canon established for her. And that’s how I’ve tried to keep it for all the canon characters I use. If there are no canon characters who can fulfill a certain role? Then an OC it is!

I admit, it was a lot of fun repurposing characters, but stories like mine reach a point where you can’t really do that believably anymore. I think starting off with as many canon characters in relevant roles as possible did help a lot with capturing the interest of readers who were intrigued by how much the world they knew from ATLA had changed in this setting, but it wasn’t sustainable to do that forever.

As for focusing more on canon characters than on OCs, I’m pretty sure I’ve done that, on the most part. Perhaps the only exceptions for it are characters like Rui Shi, Xin Long and Kino, but other than them I think the core cast of the story is comprised by canon characters. I guess I might be forgetting someone important, I don’t know anymore xD but as to why OCs get attention where they would just be standing in the background in many other stories… I guess because I’m not a big fan of static characters with little to no personality. Not to say all my OCs have personalities, pretty sure I have some terribly flat ones xD but I do want my characters to feel like real people with lives of their own, whether OCs or not. So when Dong cries a river because his girlfriend Yumiko dumped him, he feels like a character whose life didn’t just begin as soon as Azula stepped into his room to inspect it. When Kino airs his grievances to Aang and Katara about how his fellow soldiers ignore him no matter what he does, he also feels like someone who’s had struggles, however ridiculous they were, before he got to know them. When Haiyan and Yang have no money because they eloped and have been struggling to get on their feet ever since, it’s clear they’re going through their own problems too. Rui Shi may not have any issues of that magnitude, but he has a very obvious difficulty: his charge makes his life unnecessarily difficult ever since she got it into her head to get a gladiator :’D And there’s next to no reason for him to be pleased for that.

Ultimately, writing an OC is no different from writing a canon character as long as you let them have lives of their own, even if simple lives. And that’s what has guided me into writing this story and the characters featuring in it as I have.

#gladiator #ocs #... secret to ocs maybe? #I dunno #anyways people need to be less afraid of using OCs if they really need them #especially in coherent roles #where you can't have anyone else #also um I've added a fuckton of my old OCs into the story since ages ago #obviously not a lot of people know or can even notice because most of them are unknown BUT #one day I'm gonna draw 'em #in all their forms (?) #because I need practice on clip art studio whatsitsname #and that's my best idea for it #so HAHAHAHA #OC SPREE GALORE ONE DAY #MARK MY WORDS!!! #long-winded anon

[the-rovarians]

Some Information on Rovarians

- Basic Appearance/Anatomy - *They look like the Spirit/Opportunity rovers, except for the following differences.

Average height-around six feet tall

Average weight-around 500 to 600 pounds

Two robotic humanoid arms with five-fingered hands

Midsection below the shoulders is thicker and slightly darker in color

Females have lighter-colored solar panels than males

Two pairs of eyes

One set of eyes (the bigger ones) sees like we do. The “regular” eyes. The smaller ones see in infrared

The four camera eyes are what create facial expression, with shutters and apertures. 

Their voices are synthesized, but still sound completely human, making it harder for others to write them off as just robots. They're beyond that, they're people

The solar panels can fold and unfold at their owner's will, allowing parents to carry the youngest ones on their backs

- “Reproduction” (Growing the Species) -

The actual Rovarian is a combination of the parents’ programming and code, which is what contains the personality, the “soul” (do not try it with Earth computers, it won’t work. They have special alien computers that do literally nothing else but this.)

Rovarian "sex" is just two people putting code into a computer.

The new code is generated by randomly selecting parts from each parent's code. These are NOT "designer babies".

Although traits are randomly selected, this doesn't mean the child could end up with an extra arm or missing eyes or anything.

The new child's code is then sent to special replicators that produce the frame, program it with the child's new code and activated.

The child “grows” as their code and programming evolves and matures. 

They start out as little Sojourner models, as their programming isn’t yet complex enough to handle a big adult body. 

They stay that way from “birth” to early toddler age (about 1 or 2 years for humans) then transition to a miniature version of the adult body. 

The old frame is then reused for another child, or is recycled for its resources (yeah, these guys are way smarter with their resources than a lot of today’s humans) 

They continue through gradually larger versions of this frame until they’re in the adult one, which on average is somewhere around 6 feet tall (of course there are 5 and 7 foot area outliers.)

When a Rovarian dies, their frame is either recycled (for another Rovarian or for resources) or buried, depending on the wishes of the family and/or the deceased person's last requests.    

This is the way historical figures are remembered. They are interned either beneath or inside their respective monuments.

- General Society Roles -

Once they reach adulthood, they’ve been schooled and educated in all the stuff that everyone needs to know. 

About a Martian year  (1.88 Earth years) after the transition to the adult frame, they either take on a profession as a civilian, enter the government in some way, or join the Rovarian equivalent of Starfleet (some choose to join Starfleet itself) where they eventually get posted to a ship and captain, such as Captain Kiali of the Rovarian flagship Artax. 

They generally choose their names from stars (Admiral Sirius), constellations  (soldiers Centaurus and Crux), or other astronomical bodies (Ensign Messier, ambassador Lady Carina). 

Metal bands worn on the upper arm indicate rank, department, and specialty. Some may also have an insignia for a specific ship on their rank band.

One does not need to be in government, military, or fleet to have department and specialty bands. For example, general practice doctors will have Medical department bands, surgeons will have Medical department bands and Surgery specialty bands

- Historical Events and Achievements -

The last of a dying race found the twins (Spirit and Opportunity), and, knowing they were going to die, decided to save the rovers, giving them their own life force, as well as their own technological knowledge of how to use resources they had stored on Mars. Very little is known about this race, except Spirit and Opportunity’s hazy memories of them. Rovarian historians suspect they purposefully erased all records of themselves, though why is unclear.

The Rovarians claimed Mars as their homeworld and an evolved Spirit and Opportunity as their co-leaders.

Before official First Contact, a human military-esque group of xenophobic extremists planning to wipe them out before they could “invade and enslave us” (which never crossed their minds) ambushed a landing party with the twins (Spirit and Opportunity), who came back to visit the place and people who made them.

The twins were the only survivors, and the group stole their ship, using it to lure others to Earth, where cells of the group waited. 

The Rovarian crews were overwhelmed and slaughtered, and the ships used to wage a short but bloody war on the Rovarians, with battles fought on both planets (Earth and Mars), and in space. 

At one point, NASA’s Reconnaissance Orbiter took pictures of a Martian plain littered with fallen Rovarian warriors, as well as their living friends and family searching for their bodies. 

Some humans did side with them, and the conflict, while essentially ending in a draw, led to Earth working with them instead of against, as it was made clear they have no desire or reason to invade us.

Opportunity was severely, almost fatally wounded in one of the war’s battles, but the JPL rover teams turned the lab into a makeshift OR and were able to save him (after figuring out how to airlift/transport him safely and without further injuring him)

JPL was on the Rovarians’ side from the start of the war, since they already kinda felt like the rovers were more than machines,  

They're the ones who got the rest of NASA to take the Rovarians' side, which helped turn the tide of the war, since the extremists then had a harder time communicating with their space and Mars forces,

NASA was in charge of almost everything space, and almost nothing got to or through space without them knowing it. 

Add to that NASA also gained access to Rovarian tech, which enabled them to make it even MORE difficult for the extremists to function by cutting off communication completely.

As a result, the stolen ships had no warning and no time to prepare before a Rovarian fleet showed up to apprehend them.

An important feat of theirs: Massive magnetic field generators at the poles, so they could give Mars an M-class atmosphere. This makes trade and diplomatic matters much easier, since most species require such an atmosphere. 

Having advanced alien tech, they were able to pick up on pretty much everything we were doing. And I mean EVERYTHING. That’s why the Rigel filter (named for its inventor) was created. It blocked out all the offensive (to a Rovarian) communications humans send. (it’s basically a spam filter (that actually works) on steroids

- Social Customs, Beliefs, and Daily Life -

Water and food are replicated as needed for visitors. 

Farming is kind of a waste, as the whole species feeds off of solar energy (which, thanks to advances in Rovarian medicine and science, can be stored in much larger amounts in the same size battery) 

There are artificial solar energy generators for emergencies.

The Rovarians actually find the human obsession with sex/sexuality/female bodies to be super weird and a little disturbing/off-putting

It's actually HUGELY insulting to make sexual comments to them. 

Relationships are based on feelings for the other person. 

They actually think the sex obsession is what holds humans back from advancing more quickly.

They avoided money. They do more of a large scale barter system, and everybody contributes to the society in various ways. 

They have stores of other species' currency, but it's only used for trade with said species.

This way, nobody ends up in poverty and there's no 1 percent elite. 

Even healthcare is given based on how urgent your need is. (the field of regular psychology is still needed. These are people, not just programs, and people always need regular psychology)

The system works smoothly, and crime is mainly just thievery and vandalism (because every species is going to have born criminals.) 

Stuff like murder, which is very rare, is obviously still a crime, as is most of the major stuff ( dealing in illegal contraband, scams, espionage, etc.)

Things like racing shuttlecraft around planets are common activities anyone could do.

- Rovarian Stardate System -

The first two digits of the stardate indicate the century

The second two indicate the exact year (Earth year*)

The third two are the Earth month

The decimal point number is the exact day. 

For example, this stardate, 215004.05, translates to April 5, 2050, in the 21st century.

They use Earth time because Mars time is only practical for those actually on Mars. For those on ships, it doesn’t make much sense. (this is just a cryptic way of saying that I am too hopeless at math to convert everything to Mars time. There’s lots of decimals involved in that.)

- Arts -

Music

No wind instruments

Non-electronic music consists of strings, percussion, and vocals (singing)

They do also play electronic music (think Daft Punk, Basshunter, or any other techno artist)

The overall style can range from sounding like Celtic or New Age to sounding like techno or dance music, or anything in between. It depends on who’s playing.

Architecture

Very futuristic, but with sharp, boxy design and edges

Lots of metals and glass for materials, very clean and shiny

No stairs, it’s all ramps or lifts (elevators)

Some buildings, usually those with huge crowds moving through, such as the spaceport, have moving sidewalks and moving ramps (Rovarian version of an escalator.

Cities have very tall buildings, thanks to the planet’s lower gravity making it easier to lift materials up to those heights.

Many buildings (especially the tallest ones) are designed to light up at night, some having patterns of color change or light movement

A plaque inside the main entrance of the building credits the architect, as well as everyone who helped construct it

Sculpture

As with architecture, metals are the primary material used

Depending on the artist, the piece can be something ethereal-looking, something futuristic, or something inspired by Earth art styles

There are many installment pieces, especially in cities. These can be inside buildings or out in parks and other public areas.

A plaque or sign placed with the piece credits the artist and anyone who helped construct it.

For smaller sculptures, a signature from the artist can be found directly on the piece itself

Visual Art

There are Rovarians who draw and paint, both traditionally and digitally

Many digital artists like to animate their work

They may also include an animated version of their signature

Traditional painters, along with ordinary paints, will also use metallic and/or glowing paints in their work 

Like traditional Earth artists, they sign their paintings. The same is true for Rovarian drawing artists.

Some Rovarians practice textile arts such as weaving fabric, as this is a commodity that can be good for trading with other species

Other media for Rovarian visual artists include, but are not limited to: holograms, fiber-optics, LEDs, found items (for “upcycling”)

Theatre/Dance

Yes, these do exist for Rovarians

The first ever live production was a retelling of the twins’ story through dance, with singers and musicians providing the music

Costumes are typically very elaborate and eyecatching, unless the production calls for more subtlety.

Dance style is usually smooth, flowing, and graceful, though it can also be sharp, snappy, and energetic.

Literature

Very similar to Earth literature, except that the genre of erotica does not exist

Some writers will collaborate with an artist to create a graphic novel or a holo-novel

FINALLY got the information on these guys up.

Photos courtesy of @nasa , myself (the craptastic drawing), and an artist whose name I couldn’t find, but I know it’s someone awesome because of that Opportunity painting

#sci-fi #aliens #original species #rovarian #nasaAU #mars rover

[justsomeantifas]

When Rokhaia Naassan gives birth in the coming days, she and her baby boy will enter a new category in the eyes of Danish law. Because she lives in a low-income immigrant neighborhood described by the government as a “ghetto,” Rokhaia will be what the Danish newspapers call a “ghetto parent” and he will be a “ghetto child.”

Starting at the age of 1, “ghetto children” must be separated from their families for at least 25 hours a week, not including nap time, for mandatory instruction in “Danish values,” including the traditions of Christmas and Easter, and Danish language. Noncompliance could result in a stoppage of welfare payments. Other Danish citizens are free to choose whether to enroll children in preschool up to the age of six.

Denmark’s government is introducing a new set of laws to regulate life in 25 low-income and heavily Muslim enclaves, saying that if families there do not willingly merge into the country’s mainstream, they should be compelled.

For decades, integrating immigrants has posed a thorny challenge to the Danish model, intended to serve a small, homogeneous population. Leaders are focusing their ire on urban neighborhoods where immigrants, some of them placed there by the government, live in dense concentrations with high rates of unemployment and gang violence.

Politicians’ description of the ghettos has become increasingly sinister. In his annual New Year’s speech, Prime Minister Lars Lokke Rasmussen warned that ghettos could “reach out their tentacles onto the streets” by spreading violence, and that because of ghettos, “cracks have appeared on the map of Denmark.” Politicians who once used the word “integration” now call frankly for “assimilation.”

That tough approach is embodied in the “ghetto package.” Of 22 proposals presented by the government in early March, most have been agreed upon by a parliamentary majority, and more will be subject to a vote in the fall.

Some are punitive: One measure under consideration would allow courts to double the punishment for certain crimes if they are committed in one of the 25 neighborhoods classified as ghettos, based on residents’ income, employment status, education levels, number of criminal convictions and “non-Western background.” Another would impose a four-year prison sentence on immigrant parents who force their children to make extended visits to their country of origin — described here as “re-education trips” —in that way damaging their “schooling, language and well-being.” Another would allow local authorities to increase their monitoring and surveillance of “ghetto” families.

Some proposals have been rejected as too radical, like one from the far-right Danish People’s Party that would confine “ghetto children” to their homes after 8 p.m. (Challenged on how this would be enforced, Martin Henriksen, the chairman of Parliament’s integration committee, suggested in earnest that young people in these areas could be fitted with electronic ankle bracelets.)

At this summer’s Folkemodet, an annual political gathering on the island of Bornholm, the justice minister, Soren Pape Poulsen, shrugged off the rights-based objection.

“Some will wail and say, ‘We’re not equal before the law in this country,’ and ‘Certain groups are punished harder,’ but that’s nonsense,” he said, adding that the increased penalties would affect only people who break the law.

To those claiming the measures single out Muslims, he said: “That’s nonsense and rubbish. To me this is about, no matter who lives in these areas and who they believe in, they have to profess to the values required to have a good life in Denmark.”

Yildiz Akdogan, a Social Democrat whose parliamentary constituency includes Tingbjerg, which is classified as a ghetto, said Danes had become so desensitized to harsh rhetoric about immigrants that they no longer register the negative connotation of the word “ghetto” and its echoes of Nazi Germany’s separation of Jews.

“We call them ‘ghetto children, ghetto parents,’ it’s so crazy,” Ms. Akdogan said. “It is becoming a mainstream word, which is so dangerous. People who know a little about history, our European not-so-nice period, we know what the word ‘ghetto’ is associated with.”

She pulled out her phone to display a Facebook post from a right-wing politician, railing furiously at a Danish supermarket for selling a cake reading “Eid Mubarak,” for the Muslim holiday of Eid. “Right now, facts don’t matter so much, it’s only feelings,” she said. “This is the dangerous part of it.”

For their part, many residents of Danish “ghettos” say they would move if they could afford to live elsewhere. On a recent afternoon, Ms. Naassan was sitting with her four sisters in Mjolnerparken, a four-story, red brick housing complex that is, by the numbers, one of Denmark’s worst ghettos: forty-three percent of its residents are unemployed, 82 percent come from “non-Western backgrounds,” 53 percent have scant education and 51 percent have relatively low earnings.

The Naassan sisters wondered aloud why they were subject to these new measures. The children of Lebanese refugees, they speak Danish without an accent and converse with their children in Danish; their children, they complain, speak so little Arabic that they can barely communicate with their grandparents. Years ago, growing up in Jutland, in Denmark’s west, they rarely encountered any anti-Muslim feeling, said Sara, 32.

“Maybe this is what they always thought, and now it’s out in the open,” she said. “Danish politics is just about Muslims now. They want us to get more assimilated or get out. I don’t know when they will be satisfied with us.”

Rokhaia, her due date fast approaching, flared with anger at the mandatory preschool program approved by the government last month: Already, she said, her daughter was being taught so much about Christmas in kindergarten that she came home begging for presents from Santa Claus.

“Nobody should tell me whether or how my daughter should go to preschool. Or when,” she said. “I’d rather lose my benefits than submit to force.”

Barwaqo Jama Hussein, 18, a Somali refugee, noted that many immigrant families, including her own, had been settled in “ghetto” neighborhoods by the government. She moved to Denmark when she was 5 and has lived in the Tingbjerg ghetto area since she was 13. She said the politicians’ description of “parallel societies” simply did not fit her, or Tingbjerg.

“It hurts that they don’t see us as equal people,” she said. “We actually live in Danish society. We follow the rules, we go to school. The only thing we don’t do is eat pork.”

About 12 miles south of the city, in the middle-class suburb of Greve, though, voters gushed with approval over the new laws.

“They spend too much Danish money,” said Dorthe Pedersen, a hairdresser, daubing chestnut dye on a client’s hairline. “We pay their rent, their clothing, their food, and then they come in broken Danish and say, ‘We can’t work because we’ve got a pain.’”

Her client, Anni Larsen, told a story about being invited by a Turkish immigrant to their child’s wedding and being scandalized to discover that the guests were separated by gender and seated in different rooms. “I think there were only 10 people from Denmark,” she said, appalled. “If you ask me, I think they shouldn’t have invited us.”

Anette Jacobsen, 64, a retired pharmacist’s assistant, said she so treasured Denmark’s welfare system, which had provided her four children with free education and health care, that she felt a surge of gratitude every time she paid her taxes, more than 50 percent of her yearly income. As for immigrants using the system, she said, “There is always a cat door for someone to sneak in.”

“Morally, they should be grateful to be allowed into our system, which was built over generations,” she said.

#denmark #what the fuck is going on news #xenophobia #islamophobia #racism #dehumanization

[patrycjazawisza-blog]

Initial Thoughts Before Starting My Research Internship

Why did you choose the activity you chose?

When I first read about the Third Term Programme, I was eager to find out whether there was an opportunity to gain experience related to my degree. After analysing all the different internships, I narrowed my options down to two. Being stuck between the Research and Exchange Internship and the Data Analyst Internship, I decided that my interest in research and academia will suit the research-based internship more. Having just completed my first year at University I am torn between wanting to be a part of the thriving corporate world or continue with my education to enter academia as an intrigued Economist. Given this opportunity, I will gain the advantage of hands-on experience of secondary based research and get a taste of what working in an academic setting is like.

Another factor that was crucial in my decision is the chance of working within the Future Economies University Research Centre led by Professor Donna Lee. Prior to starting my journey at MMU, I took time to do my own research on the University and what kind of work they are involved in and that’s how I came across Future Economies. As soon as I delved down into the details of the role Future Economies plays, within the local Northern Powerhouse as well as on a national and international level, I was extremely impressed. The focus is placed on blending the fields of economics, politics and policy together to provide scholarly research and respond to policy changes, which is crucial during times of crisis such as Brexit. Therefore, being selected to work alongside such an organization which deals with current issues and has real positive impact on the community felt like a ‘pinch-me’ kind of moment.

What specifically do you want to get out of the experience? How do you want to develop as a consequence?

Going forward, I have a variety of goals I have set myself in order to get the best out of my experience, both personal and academic that I would like to achieve by the end of my five-week internship.

From a personal point of view, I want to gain confidence in the ability of building and maintaining professional relationships. This internship is, without a doubt, something that is completely out of my comfort zone. Liaising with academics and researchers everyday will help me develop personal qualities such as confidence and assertiveness that are integral in succeeding in any workplace environment. Having such qualities is also beneficial during events such as Networking when meeting potential employers. As I will be undertaking a placement year developing such skills will be extremely beneficial during interview stages and assessment centres. Due to the competitive nature of the labour market, even more so for students securing placements, this internship will enrich my CV immensely as it demonstrates dedication and interest in addition to my degree. Plus, this experience and the process of creating a portfolio to document the whole journey means I have something to show potential employers in the near future to back-up how much I have managed to achieve during my five week internship with other physical outcomes of research and papers I will produce or be a part of.

On an academic level, developing good research skills will benefit me going into my second and third year at University. As I will be amongst full-time researchers and academics whom do this day-to-day, they will certainly shed light on the different and useful ways of tackling research-based projects. As the Future Economies Research Centre is so broad and handles a lot of different projects I suspect I may not be working on anything related to economics, however I’m positive my given task will set me up with the right framework and easily transferable skills of tackling research which will be needed for assignments such as a Dissertation in third year.

What do you think will be your personal challenges, and what can you do to make sure you overcome them?

Initially I think one of the biggest challenges I will be facing is commuting. If I am expected to be in everyday from 9 to 5 as the typical working day, it may be hard at first to adjust to getting up early to make sure I make my train on time. Total commute time will be around 3 hours in total to Manchester and back therefore my days may become very long and tiring. However, it will be a matter of getting used to and ensuring I get enough sleep. To overcome this challenge, I will need to be organised and wake up and go to sleep at reasonable times. Additionally, I can use my time effectively by working on the train to catch up on any tasks that require more work on.

Another challenge that may become apparent is the number of quantitative tasks I will be faced with. Although I have gained good quantitative skills during my first year of University, I take longer to be able to tackle quantitative tasks as it is one of my weaker areas. To make sure I overcome this, I will work on any quantitative projects in my spare time outside of my internship to understand thoroughly what I am asked to do and produce results to the highest possible standard. I will also not be shy in asking for clarification or further guidance when needed as I know that can be a personal challenge for myself due to having a very independent nature. Although this part of research may be slightly more difficult, the best way to learn is through practise.

What do you bring to the experience which will make you excel? What are your particular valuable talents or qualities?

I think I am a very hard-working person with a lot of motivation and dedication. Every piece of work I have been set I do to the best of my abilities. I am able to work independently and manage my own time well. These qualities are crucial in excelling in my particular activity as in order to be a successful researcher you need to be able to work effectively and have a lot of self-motivation. Personally, I believe my strongest attribute is the ability to write very well which can be demonstrated through achieving 68%-72% in all three of my written assignments in my first year at University. The ability to articulate myself clearly and profoundly will benefit me as the list of tasks for this activity include drafting publications and reviews. Furthermore, gaining analytical skills throughout the past year will equip me with the ability to analyse and evaluate effectively in a clear and strong academic setting.

This blog is dedicated to sharing my thoughts and experiences throughout my time as an intern. Hopefully this will give me a useful insight into the academic setting of a research-based profession and help me in deciding whether I would like to pursue a research career as opposed to other routes.

[fyrapartnersearch]

Looking for some sci-fi shenanigans!

Obligatory long post ahead warning: this post is quite long and I know it may be intimidating to some readers but please don’t let it put you off if you’d still like to rp with me :)

Hello ladies, gents and fellow rpers. After having a writing blast and seeing how I’ve got room for some more partners I’ve decided to come back in search of some partners who are interested in what I’m looking for.I’ve got a good ten or so odd years of rping experience under my belt but any potential partners do not necessarily have to have the same experience, they simply need to fit under these three things:

-third person only with correct spelling, grammar and punctuation.

- at least one small (no less than seven lines) paragraph per post as well as being willing to write more if the situation calls for it. Please do not contact me intending to give me only small paragraphs with each response as the above is simply the bare minimum I’ll accept if there’s not much going on in the rp that warrants a full paragraph.

-no one liners, one worders, script talk, poorly written sentences or just laziness in general.

This isn’t terribly much to ask for as picky as it sounds.

An important thing I shall mention is that NSFW (i don’t fade to black nor do I care when the smut happens. Just please don’t leave me once the smut has happened like lots of people seem to unfortunately do) and dark themes are a thing that occur in all my rp’s so I require you to at least be eighteen before you reach out to me. I will not accept anyone younger than 18 since I myself am in my early twenties. Underaged characters are also a no go as well. Please know that I’m in the eastern Australian time zone but almost any time zone Is compatible for me as I am awake at very odd hours. Another important thing I shall add is that you must be able to post at least once or more a day and if I don’t get any response after two weeks then I shall simply move on (only exception is if you notify me beforehand as to why you may not be able to post for a while. I’m not that vicious).

I only rp as male characters, as it’s simply my preference, I do MxM or FxM pairings. I will not double and I do not play multiple characters. I don’t do sub/dom dynamics when it comes to any aspect of the relationship. My characters are also non human (they’re aliens since this is a sci-fi rp after all) but what species your character is doesn’t matter to me at all as long as it’s not some god modded Mary Sue. Please remember that alien simply means a creature not from earth. Aliens can have fur, scales, feathers, etc, depending on where they come from. An alien with fur or scalies is not a furry or a scalie and please do not refer to them as such as it’s rude to label someone’s character as something they’re not. I will not write with someone who will insist that the theory of chimpanzees and humans unable to crossbreed should apply to hybrid characters regardless of whether they’re alien/alien or human/alien. This is fiction, not reality. Please also do not control my characters or dictate their actions. My characters are also premade and only have descriptions, I don’t do face claims or pics. I also do not care if you make a character up on the spot.

Please remember that this is a sci-fi rp and that I will not accept requests to do fandoms or any genre that doesn’t fit within the category of sci-fi. i will not accept a character that has no place in a sci-fi rp either like a dragon,harpy,demon, elf or some other fantasy creature.

First day on the job:

Everyone at the space academy remembers graduation day. The day where they became recognised as the very things they strived to be whether it’s a pilot, an engineer, mechanic, a simple Jack of all trades or even a commander if they worked hard enough. Everyone also remembers the few days after the big Moment as well. Days where one is expected to take to whatever rank they’ve had bestowed upon them almost immediately and the responsibilities that came with it as if they’d been born to do it from day one. Some things are easier said than done though, especially when trouble finds ways to manifest in forms that many would not suspect to be of any cause for concern.

(Important point of notice: I will be playing the newly graduated commander of a small crew. You are free to play as either a crew member of any rank or even a trouble making character like a criminal or something similar that gives my character a run for their money. Possibilities are endless)

Runaway royalty:

The life of a Royal was simple yet complex at the same time. They were weighed on hand and foot and never had to lift a finger to do anything provided there was a maid or servant nearby willing to do whatever task it was the royal had for them. They were expected to grow into decent, respectable leaders who could ruler a planet fairly without struggle. For many royals, they were content to follow this regularly repeating path of “destiny” that their ancestors had set them on. All but one it seems. What happens when a sheltered prince/princess takes their chance on the world beyond the walls of their castle for a chance to see the universe itself?

(Important point of notice: you will be playing the prince/princess. I’ll be playing the non Royal character they run into.)

Worlds apart:

War. War was a terrible thing that brought nations to their knees and saw many people lose their lives and freedom. Many people and aliens liked to think that all the major wars were over and done with, that they’d never have to relive the horrors that once fell upon them. To put it simply: if no one hears about bad happenings, then it’s not their problem that needs to be taken care of nor does it exist. Sadly, it does not seem to be the case for everyone. A stranger from a planet so far away that many do not believe it to exist turns up on the doorstep of an alien who is forced to realise that war could very well be just around the corner once more.

Forced:

“there’s no such thing as a bad person. Only bad choices.” Is a saying that is older than time itself. For many who are forced into a position where they have no other choice but to put their morals aside and do as they’re told, this is all too true. A space farer is captured by criminals and forced to choose between death or working as the criminals captain’s personal assistant. That means every order has to be obeyed and every rule must be followed or consequences will be dealt by force. As time passes and life go ons, the captured spacer starts to see his predicament in a different light.

(Important point of notice: I will be playing the captured spacer. You will be playing the captain.)

Forbidden romance:

aliens and humans are forbidden from associating with one another in any way that isn’t political. Whilst the two races have put aside enough of their differences to coexist in their own little pockets of space, not everyone is accepting of the idea that the two different species could live together as one, let alone ever simply just coexist peacefully together without insisting that alien planets and human planets are to be kept seperate. To trespass on the strictly human or alien occupied planets is a crime that few dare to commit. What starts out as a simple act of one sided rebellion and show of courage turns into an unanticipated adventure.

(Important point of notice, I shall be playing the alien. I’m open to this also being an alien X alien pairing.)

The hunter and the hunted:

bounty hunting was one of the few illegal professions in the galaxy that made any trouble you got into for participating in the act of killing or kidnapping someone for worth it depending on who it was you’d been given the task of tracking down. Many bounties were more profitable alive of course since it cut back on many of the legal troubles one could face if caught with a dead body. A galaxy renowned bounty hunter has been tasked with taking down one of the roughest and most wanted criminals known to man and alien with the orders to return them dead or alive. Will they succeed or fail like many before them have?

(Important point of notice: I shall be playing the criminal. You shall be playing the bounty hunter.)

Space criminals and the law:

humans and aliens have been living amongst each other side by side ever since humanity dared to venture beyond the Milky Way and made first contact with aliens. With the solar system no longer being man’s only playground other planets were quickly colonised under the new alliance between extraterrestrials and Homo sapiens. Whether you were an alien, human or a hybrid did not matter in the known galaxies. All that mattered was who you were. Not everyone took to the integration very well (there were numerous protests on both sides) but most people were willing to share in the hopes of peace. Not everyone had good intentions though……

Trouble in the alien kingdom:

the planet of (insert generic planet name here) was one of prosperity, hardship and wealth. The kingdom of (insert generic kingdom name here) was ruled by a king and a queen whose heir was betrothed to a rival planet in the hopes that a political marriage would prevent another war from happening. Only problem was that no one could see the rival planets true plans….all but one. Unfortunately no ones going to listen to a deranged commoner who probably may not even be telling the truth. What’s one to do when no one will listen?

Exile:

The wind howled as thunder crashed and shrieked all around the abandoned cargo ship. Rain pelted the metal hull, turning the ground into a cold, treacherously slippery and muddy shallow river. The ship itself had crashed into the planet countless centuries ago and was slowly being reclaimed by the environment. Plants grew from cracks in the floor as moss and vines decorated the walls. A figure sat miserably hunched in what was once the cockpit of the ship, their only shelter from the raging elements outside but not from the storm that raged inside of them. The figure leapt to their feet as the sounds of footsteps in the mud drew closer and they held their breath. Who would dare to venture out here on such a miserable night?

War of the worlds:

humans and aliens were never meant to coexist peacefully with one another. There was too much fear, Too much misinformation and too much bias on both sides for such a thing to have ever been successful. It was the humans fault that the war had started. They were the ones who’d shot down the alien ship that had been packed with specially chosen diplomats that represented each alien race known to the galaxies they dwelled in that had been on their way to earth to negotiate a truce and a plan for peace. They hadn’t even hesitated to shoot the ship full of aliens yet they’d been surprised when war had been declared on the spot. Two races. Two worlds so different yet the same fighting one another for what was either a mistake or intentional murder.

Rehab:

The UGWP alliance (unite the galaxies for the protection of all worlds and for peace alliance) portrayed themselves as calm, charismatic and kind men and women who held only the thoughts of a life together with all species living happily together. They advertised campaigns for inter species jobs, provided information to the public about human/alien interactions and encouraged diversity amongst planets. Their rehabilitation program for troublesome fellows was considered to be a god send to try and cut down on the amount of space related crimes. No one ever questioned what went on beyond the closed doors to the facility, if they did, the UGWP would have their darkest secrets revealed. Something they strove to keep under wraps. When the arrival of a particularly wild prisoner occurs, the threat of their first failure and first escaped prisoner is lurking around the corner.

(Important point of notice: in this rp idea I’d be playing said prisoner, I don’t mind if you choose to be one as well.)

Academy days:

the galaxy alliance and military defence force academy was one of the most respected training academies in the known galaxies. Men, women, aliens, humans and all of those who were in between went there to study, train and, one day if they passed the mentally, emotionally and physically gruelling years of tests, fly and be put in their own squadron. There were approximately six spots to fill on any team and the cadet who suited that spot the most would be given the title of pilot, squad leader, second in command, engineer, gunner and navigator. Each team was similar but unique in what they did. Not everyone gets along though and rivalries grow high during that delicate time between graduating and being put on a team. What happens when the top student and the lonesome outcast with a temper clashes?

Captured:

Space criminals have been around ever since advanced technology allowed others to travel and live in space as if they were living anywhere else. They’re often cunning, tricky to catch and more often than not are clever at disguising themselves whenever those wanted posters come up. It takes skill to be on the wrong side of space law and true talent to get away with it. The galaxy’s current most wanted man has finally been captured by an alliance captain and his crew. Will he beg for mercy? Will he be given a trial before being thrown into a cell to rot or will he be given a chance to turn himself around with some hard labour?

(Important point of notice: I’ll be playing the criminal for this one. You will be the alliance captain)

Enslaved:

imagine living the life of one of the most successful people on the run that could exist. Galaxies trembled at your name. You and your crew swam in wealth and the going was good. Mutiny, sadly and sometimes not sadly, exists on its own accord. One man reflected on this as he was forced to his feet. A collar attached to a chain and electromagnetic handcuffs prevented his escape as he stood for all those who cared to glance as they walked by in the market to see. No one wants to have their only life’s purpose to be to serve another……only sometimes people don’t get that choice.

(Important point of notice: I’ll be playing the slave/servant. You’ll be the master/mistress.)

Betrothed:

for as long as there has been civilisation and leaders, there has been arranged marriages. Arranged marriages, or betrothals as they were more often called, consisted of pairing two people together and making them get married in order to secure ties to another land or another planet. Political marriages benefited everyone but the married pair it always seemed. After all, you couldn’t possibly be happy being married to a complete and utter stranger? How does one who is betrothed build a life of love and prosperity when the one who bears the rings of their union is not the one who also bears their heart?

(Important point of notice: this can go two ways, either our characters are betrothed to each other or one character is betrothed. The idea has endless possibilities)

Invasion:

march 18th in the year of 6079 was the day that the aliens invaded earth. They’d been planning the take over for some time as they came prepared and easily took out Earth’s defence forces. No one knows exactly why the extraterrestrial beings from the outer worlds came to the humble blue and green planet the humans had existed on for millions of years nor did they seem to have any true intentions known other than conquering the planet and taking it for their own. This has led to the belief that all aliens must be the cruel monsters the humans stories have made them out to be. What happens when the actions of one alien puts that to the test?

(Important point of notice: I’m open to having this idea turned around and having the humans invade an alien world to take over.)

The chosen:

The galaxy alliance had chosen its newest crew to serve and protect the known galaxies. Five young cadets who’d graduated at the top of their classes and would hopefully mark the start of a new generation of spacers and heroes. The leader of the new crew has yet to be decided and tensions are high because of this. Can differences be put aside and acceptance shown? Or will nothing but chaos ensue?

The Walking wounded:

when one worked as a galaxy defence force member, they were on the frontline of everything. Every battle. Every loss. Every victory. Every struggle that the force went through they had to be there and follow the rules. You could not kill an unarmed person regardless of whether they were hostile or not. You could not turn down a plea for help even when there was reasons to suspect something was amiss. In simple terms: you simply couldn’t do anything that would make your morals be questioned. What happens when even the captain says to leave all those rules and everything you were taught by the door when faced with someone who seems to be the exception to the rule. What’s the right thing to do not by them but the entire galaxy?

Stowaway:

the galaxies were once a place of freedom and exploration. A place where you had no limits as to where you wanted to go. Now thanks to new laws, permits are required to access certain systems, quadrants and galaxies. Problem is, this permit is unobtainable by the average civilian so many have taken to learning the art of boarding another’s ship and hoping for the best. Discovery is more or less a matter of life and death. What happens when someone is unfortunate enough to be discovered?

Monster:

aliens. Aliens were terrifying beasts that were the monster in every bedtime story the humans told their children to keep them home at night. Many mothers wept when their sons and daughters applied to the space military in order to keep the extra terrestrial scum away from the galaxies they’d claimed as their own. When a human ship crashes on an alien world so far away from human civilisation it may as well not exist to the aliens and a crew member is found lost and alone by a wandering alien, will their fate be decided by a monster? Or a benevolent being?

(Important point of notice: I will be playing the alien in this scenario. I’m also open to the characters situations being swapped around so it’s the alien who crashes.)

On the run:

even on the most modern of planets, life on the lamb can be difficult. There’s authorities to avoid and even more rules to break in the game of survival. No one takes pity on those who have done wrong to the point that they have their face in the paper. Even if it’s not your fault will anyone give you shelter from the harsh cold winds of reality and a biased opinion. What happens when someone does take a chance on a poor wayfaring stranger? Will the wrong doer be turned in or given a new lease on life?

Disgraced:

when one entered the royal guard they took upon themselves an oath that bound them by blood and courage to the dedication of the protection of their king, queen and the kingdoms heirs. They were sworn to protect them from any harm whilst at the same time not allowed to use their position or power to hurt anyone else. When one breaks that oath, they are sent away in disgrace and branded as a traitor who must swear to never return. Life on the run changes people, sometimes for the better…..or for worse.

Space pirates and nobles:

space was a vast starry and endless sea that many voyaged across for the purpose of research, leisure or finding ones destiny. Like any real ocean, it was filled with dangers. The most feared of all was space pirates. Bands of blood thirsty cut throats and scandalous troublemakers whose sole pleasure in life was to steal, kill and take others prisoner against their will. Only pirates dare to do what other criminals would not. When a merchant ship is robbed by pirates what fate will befall the nobles onboard?

Healing wounds, growing love:

winter on the planet of malgor is one that is feared for its extreme weather. Snowstorms could appear out of nowhere and many a traveller had frozen to death whilst trying to make their way from one village to another. It was also a time where people were at their most vulnerable, relying on the winter harvest to feed every mouth that had been born and raised in the kingdom meant no mercy was spared for poor wayfaring strangers. When a kind soul finds a wounded outcast and decides to bring them home, they discover a threat that’s lurking just beyond the borders of their place of protection.

The knight and the heir:

royals could be spoilt. There was no denying that. A life of good food, wealth, the knowledge that they’d be pampered and weighed on hand and foot by servants was more than enough to turn even the most well mannered child into an insufferable brat. The knights tasked with the protection of the future royals knew this all too well. What happens when one particularly gruff, no nonsense knight refuses to bow to the whim of their future ruler and shows them what it means to be a true leader?

The last of a dying breed:

long ago, in a time when nobles, governments and space Pirates ruled the starry seas of space, there was a terrifying race of aliens that were considered to be the most dangerous creatures to have ever lived. When the great wars started up again due to rising tensions, the humans destroyed the planet these aliens lived on to ensure the battlefield was even. The aliens were furious at the death of an entire race and very quickly turned each and every human occupied planet into a warzone littered with their bases and encampments. Only in very small pockets of the universe does this war not exist. What happens when the last member of the species shows up on a small backwater planet?

(Important point of notice: I will be playing the alien who is the last of their kind, you are free to play as a human or the story can be made to suite a scenario where you are also an alien.)

Harden my heart:

once upon a time, there was two friends who were the best of friends that anyone could have ever seen. Two people who had each other’s backs through thick and thin. Two people who supported each other endlessly even if their morals weren’t entirely inline with each other’s. Two friends who swore to never leave each other’s sides. Alas with the time of great growing came changes, the two friends bond had severed and they’d gone their separate ways in life. What happens when they run into each other many years later?

(This idea is one open to brainstorming, anything is possible.)

captain on deck!:

captains weren’t meant to fall in love with their subordinates. They were supposed to be well refined leaders who only mingled with those of a similar status. They represented the people they worked for after all, therefore they had an image that had to be strictly maintained towards the public in order to not be disgraced in any form. Behind closed doors however…..feelings were allowed to be a little more free. Secret lovers were frowned upon but one could take the risk if they were careful. After all, the captains word was law.

yes sir!:

order.serve.fight.lead.mourn.sleep.eat.rethink your life choices and repeat. Such was the ways of a military lifestyle on a world where war seemed to be a permanent occurrence and the leaders of every world trying their best to outspite one another with their relentless attacks that it made one think of how they could improve the boring daily routine they endured each and every day. In the army, you have to be tough if you want to be a leader. You had to be charismatic, strong, cold, incapable of doing anything that would sway you to possibly turn the other cheek and let your comrades be hurt. However, even the most stoic and battle hardened leaders can get lonely despite the fact that attachments to ones comrades outside of anything but friendship are forbidden by an unspoken law.

I need you:

space is a cruel mistress to even those who are experienced with charting her waters. Space, although beautiful, is often the grave of many brave explorers, soldiers and other space faring strangers. When a stranger comes to scavenge parts from a newly crashed ship in the hopes of finding something useful, they come across a familiar face. Old feelings stir and clash with one another when the crash’s survivor awakens and finds out who their rescuer is.

Sooooo….. about those pairings. What has two stars next to it is what I’m going to play if we choose the scenario:

1: enemies to lovers or rivals.

2: **captured criminal** x prison guard or other prisoner.

3: two soldiers from seperate sides falling in love.

4: **academies bad boy/outcast** x top student

5: **low ranking ship crew member/second in command/captured space criminal** x captain.

6: **commoner/rogue/knight/street rat** x prince/princess/king/queen

7: **slave/servant** x master

8: army superior x **lower ranking soldier**

9: married person X unmarried person

10: stowaway x captain

11: nurse x **injured soldier**

12: human x **alien**

PLEASE DO NOT APPROACH ME IF:

1: YOU GHOST AT THE DROP OF A HAT.

2: YOU ARE NOT WILLING TO PUT EFFORT IN TO MEET MY REQUIREMENTS.

I’m open to discussing and potentially mixing these ideas up till we get something that we both like. If you want to learn more about a certain idea tell me the name and I shall expand on it.

The only platforms I rp on are discord,telegram and google hangouts. I will not rp on any other platform other than the ones listed. If you do not have any of those then unfortunately we cannot rp. When you reach out to me requesting for an rp via one of the below platforms In the opening message tell me what idea you liked, why you liked it, give me a little introduction about you and you must put 123 somewhere in your message so that I know you’ve read all of my post, don’t just put “hi wanna rp”. Make it interesting.

My contacts

Discord: crankypurplespacecat#6187

My telegram: Tiberionwars

My hangouts: [email protected]

I look forwards to meeting potential partners.

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