#why did you do all those things

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[eerna]

in a world filled with books written by male authors that make me go "uhhhhh this writer does Not have a good outlook on masculinity and women, this was definitely written by a man", the Chaos Walking trilogy stands as a complete opposite where I spent the entire series being like "WOW I never really thought about masculinity in this way, WOW this is painting a really interesting picture of gender dynamics and generational relationships, this was definitely written by a man"

#whenever discussion on manly male book things like rape and toxic masculinity pops up i am like. cw did it and did it well. #you CAN write a lead who makes up excuses for why he participates in a system that oppresses women!!! you CAN write about a dude falling #into the spiral of toxic masculine approval!!! you CAN give him horrible role models!! i am not opposed to that!!! #but you can't do it if part of you worships those ideals and doesn't really like women all that much. patrick ness on the other hand gets i #chaos walking liveblog #every spring i think of my kids idek why. i am still too traumatized to reread. or am i <3

[kaeyachi]

Kaeya had always been an efficient and hard-working individual (he had to be to support Diluc in the background as his brother rose thru the ranks after all).

He has so much free time because he completes all his work way ahead of schedule. And if he still has enough time, he adds more to the workload in secret.

And once all of that was done and over with, he makes time for everyone. He has to. He feels as if every moment has to be given to someone else.

No one knows how he does it. No one has to know.

Every mission has a dozen strategies in line, and every battle plan is made with efficiency in mind. His perfect record will not be tarnished. He can't risk it (even if it baffles others that he would willingly activate a ruin guard just to prevent a failed mission. Jean disagrees with his methods, but Kaeya can say that the results say otherwise)

He needs to be quick.

Efficient.

Perfect.

And so he comes and goes like the wind.

Kaeya values time because he knew every second counted. He can't just stand there as if he were frozen. Time could run out in an instant.

Kaeya had only been late once his entire life.

He'd rather he never be late ever again.

It took one day of being of being imperfect for everything to fall apart. On that tragic day...had he gotten there on time... then maybe...

.

.

.

" Come on, let's get moving, traveler. We're not frozen in place after all. " Kaeya teasingly says. He stiffles a giggle at the traveler's exhasperated sigh.

"Yeah yeah, we've heard enough of you calling us a slacker. Can't you be a bit more patient?" Paimon whines at him.

Kaeya snorts, but acquiesces, hiding the shaking of his hands at the thought of being idle.

He imagines hearing a clock ticking.

Kaeya knows that that is his own problem. He tries his hardest to relax as he waits for the traveler to finish whatever they're making on the alchemy table because, seriously, it is supposed to be a relaxing day. There's nothing major going on, and his schedule is once again empty as intended. What's the hurry?

Kaeya taps his foot on the ground as he waits. He wishes he could take his own damn advice when he tells others to relax.

#kaeyachi randoms #kaeya #kaeya alberich #this is actually shorter than it originally was can yall believe? #kaeya with anxiety truther there i said it #kaeya cant stand being IDLE #get it? get it? #you see that is a play of words in reference to when he is stood idle on our screens. he is one of the more verbally impatient characters #and we also see it reflected on his actions both in fighting and at work. he has a speed boost bonus and if he isnt teleporting he is #actually moving so fast that he seems like it. this is what i also concluded that results him in large amounts of free time that only amber #seemed to be hardpressed about. the people of mondstadt find him reliable and approachable despite the lax attitude and frequent nights at #angels share. we also had lore tidbits before of kaeya straight up saying he finished all his work and jean saying that he also did the #backlogged ones. It is actually insane that we hear him relaxing frequently and i bet its not because of the lack of horses COZ LOOK AT HOW #BUSY THE OTHER CAPTAINS ARE. Also id like to think that he is a toned down noelle and that is why jean told him to watch over her training #give us noelle and kaeya interactions pls i kinda need it tbh #to all those that reached this far into the notes i actually have more to say so get ready #if it wasnt clear the only day he was late was when crepus died. everything fell apart for him that day so i can see some obsessive need to #just keep running around and doing things as efficient as possible. I also think that he found the knights slow and inefficient in several #occasions and he is willing to put them in the line of fire just to get their hearts pumping with adrenaline (and fear lol). idk kaeya is #just so anxiety-coded. impatience-core. Mr. dont waste my time type of guy. and also wow look i found a way to make his idles become angst #silly me ehe #oh youre still here? how about i tell you that kaeya-efficiency-alberich probably knows where everyone is at any time of the day? #can we honestly please give him more free time i need more of him tbh #fun reminder that bro is working around 3-4 jobs casually lmao #i also just realized that the notes is a whole nother post on its own #AND THE ACTUAL FUNNY PART IS I CAN STILL ELABORATE MORE ON THIS LMAO #wait let me add this one tiny idea too but he thinks time is so valuable. bro lost 2 dads and lost time with his bro + he significantly #lessened his time at dawn winery for quite some time. i can see why he is extroverted now.

[uncanny-tranny]

You know, I feel like other trans people might get this, but it's honestly kind of refreshing when a cis person has, like, undeniable tboy/tgirl/whatever swag. It's like when you come across somebody who speaks the same language as you and you only find out when they start speaking it, too.

#trans #transgender #lgbt #lgbtq #ftm #mtf #nonbinary #all this to say that we are existing on a rock hurling through space #and this universe is going to collide into another and does it all truly matter in the end? #a lot of this is based on ideas we have about what constitutes certain people and i think it can be a fun observation #so long as you do not inherently ascribe certain traits as being indicative of who somebody Is #it can be amusing when you're SO confident that somebody is a certain way until you realize how Wrong you were #the amusement for me only comes because it's like... 'you tried your best to box somebody and you FAILED lmao' #and in a weird way it's kind of comforting because it reminds me that we all come into this world with bias that Will be challenged... #...so the best thing you can do is recognize those biases and then try to overcome them through great effort... #...so yes maybe i did think that cis dude had tboy swag but. that's not inherently his problem you know? #it probably just means he's confident in his manhood in a way that reminds me of the trans men* i know and love #i noticed that in him and it reminded me of my friends who are trans so i think 'oh! maybe that's why he's giving off those vibes!' #so while i won't treat him any differently before or after finding out i was wrong i'm still going to appreciate the fact that... #...he and i are literally just Vibing on the same planet and we both don't have time for petty arguing about manhood #i'll acknowledge what inspired those thoughts in me but that is Not his problem and that's good and beautiful actually #i don't always mind the tboy/tgirl swag meme just so long as you don't treat it like an Inherent Trans Experience Only Trans People Have #just recognize where those ideas are inspired from and it's fine <3 #sometimes you will be Wrong and that's actually fucking neutral <<3 #anyway rant over i just think this is /generally/ harmless and fun #like astrology. sometimes you just look up your star sign without ascribing your Entire Life to it <3 #i think what i lot of people mean by saying a cis person has tboy/tgirl swag is just that... #...that cis person has an understanding of themself that comes from deep introspection that isn't necessarily expected of cis folk... #...but it is often something trans people do as part of our exploration of gender... #how is this the FIRST POST to reach tag limit... ask me for more thoughts if you want lol!

[thepoisonroom]

'I flirted with the idea that instead of being trans that I was just a cross-dresser (a quirk, I thought, that could be quietly folded into an otherwise average life) and that my dysphoria was sexual in nature, and sexual only. And if my feelings were only sexual, then, I wondered, perhaps I wasn’t actually trans.

I had read about a book called The Man Who Would Be Queen, by a Northwestern University professor who believed that transwomen who were attracted to women were really confused fetishists, they wanted to be women to satisfy an autogynephilia. And though I first read about this book in the context of its debunkment and disparagement, I thought about the electricity of slipping on those tights, zipping up those boots, and a stream of guilt followed. Maybe this professor was right, and maybe I was only a fetishist. Not trans, just a misguided boy.

About a year later, on the Internet, I come across a transwoman who added a unique message to the crowd refuting this professor. Oh, I wish I remember who this woman was, and I wish even more that I could do better than paraphrase her, but I remember her saying something like this: “Well, of course I feel sexy putting on women’s clothing and having a woman’s body. If you feel comfortable in your body for the first time, won’t that probably mean it’ll be the first time you feel comfortable, too, with delighting in your body as a sexual thing?”'

-Casey Plett, Consciousness

#this quote always moves me almost to tears when i remember it #i'm not a trans woman and i don't share the author's specific experiences with transition #but it really moves me that she frame transition as joyfully giving yourself permission to approach your body #not as something that has to be disciplined and deprived and made small in all these various ways #but as a means for experiencing pleasure and joy and delight and for insisting that our feelings and desires are worth #valuing and exploring and treasuring #i always used to think of prioritizing those things for myself as selfish and irresponsible #but who does it harm to want to experience pleasure in your own body? #it's such a beautifully simple and powerful switch to have flip in your head #and equally why are we forced to deny our own pleasure in transition and anything else related to our bodies in the name of moral rectitude #this is why i get so confused and pissed off when other trans people are fatphobic for example #like why are you so invested in politics of shame and disgust that never had any purpose other than #violently disciplining people as if they've violated moral codes by existing in a body #to say nothing of white people being racist in gay and trans communities #like again this system of violence is foundational to homophobia and transphobia #so why are you acting like it has nothing to do with you #even if you are unmoved by the urgency of other people's suffering which btw you should be moved by #what do you hope to gain by acting a collaborator and handmaiden to those systems #Casey Plett #she really is one of my favorite authors i wish more non-canadians read her #this quote is from a series of columns she did ont transition and every single one is a banger #i love when she talks about the people-pleasing elements of dysphoria and transition denial #she's so sharp about noting how many of us deny our own dysphoria on the grounds that others like and validate our bodies #that's how i always felt during my cis conventionally feminine era #it pleased other people so much and also that reception felt so hollow and joyless to me because i hated it #i get less of that positive feedback but that feels so unimportant next to the joy and pleasure i get to experience #said with the understanding that i'm very privileged in being able to prioritize those things without fear. but it was a switch flip #personal nonsense

[jasontoddenthusiastt]

The compelling thing about Jason as a character is that I never doubted that he cared about the world just because there weren’t panels of him being overly zealous about “restorative community care”

I’m not coming after anyone who wants to see that kind of stuff, but I do think seeking | that | as confirmation that Jason cares about the world is pretty narrow

#shoving an arc like that into his comics to “show he cares about people” #after having him repeatedly say things like “nothing I ever did was for good. it was all just selfish anger” in recent comics #would be the final nail in the “see! he's redeeming himself! he CAN be likable!” coffin (pathetic) #it's literally what his antis have been suggesting would make his character “so much better” #kelseethe #see also: “people would have a hard time knowing whether Jason loves them” #why did he gift Thomas' watch to Bruce all those years later + possibly even after utrh happened #why is he always silently forgiving the shitty treatment from his family almost like he wants to maintain some sort of relationship w/ them #as for “showing that he cares about the world” #the most obvious “evidence” is right there #why would he continue to fight tooth and nail to have a place in Gotham as a vigilante #both warding off and enduring harassment after harassment from Bruce while hearing the same message every time #“hey. you're doing this to yourself. you can make it all go away if you just do as I say and quit for good.” #“you'll even get to be my son again” #it’s not like he gets recognition/praise for doing what he does either unlike Bruce Dick or Tim #what could possibly be in it for him #wouldn't it be that much easier to “not give a crap about the world” on a beach in Capri instead of in the Gotham sewers every month #anyway Jason should decapitate rapists and poison more child traffickers and not cry about it five seconds after

[july-19th-club]

i know for a fact i have made this post before but for me it's very important that bbc merlin is a pointless tragedy. it wouldn't be good (it's frequently not good anyway but it would be a lot further away from good) if it wasn't a pointless tragedy! it's simply not arthuriana if it doesn't go past the high point of the heroic/legendary/high medieval romance stuff and end with detailed rundowns of exactly how everybody got betrayed and died like that is what makes it real arthuriana to me and not just a silly show about a wizard

#'why did he die at the end! why did they make us miserable? why can't we have nice things!' #BECAUSE IT'S ARTHURIANA OKAY .that's what HAPPENS #if you're doing arthuriana you're not doing it right unless when you finally get to the end of this endless string of knight adventures #the main guy is like. dead and you're like well . what am i supposed to do now #like when i first read the great illustrated classic abridged king arthur in third grade and got to the end ofi t #and guinevere had been sent to a nunnery and half the nights had died in this battle or that one and merlin had been stuck in a cave #and then arthur dies and bedivere chucks his sword in a lake and then the book just ENDS #and i sat there consumed with emotions id never felt before. well i would've been disappointed if the end of bbc merlin had #NOT made me feel those emotions again #but it did. to me that is in fact its greatest success #merlin #q #like. dont get me wrong i like a fixfic as much as the next guy and in fact i plot them out all the time #but you cant DO that if the original material is. like. already happy #or meant to be

[girlbloggercrowley]

i am a believer in the s3 1941 kiss

#good omens #it just makes Sense. #like the way i shot out of my seat when aziraphale said he did the apology dance in 1941... WE HAVEN'T SEEN THAT YET!!!! #my delusional theory: they kiss on the night of the zombies/blitz after their gay little romantic dinner #they freak out about it and crowley leaves #GOD what if aziraphale initiated it then. and then he shows up later in the year (?) to do the dance #as an olive branch cause at this point he's painfully in love he just wants to see crowley again #so he does the dance as like. “sorry for freaking you out here's our joke it's all okay right?” #and then crowley has to watch as aziraphale apologizes for kissing him. yeah that works! slams my head into the wall #that would explain the weirdness in 1960s #would NOT explain why aziraphale said you go too fast but like maybe more things happened in between them. #oh my god what if like they fully dated then during those years but had a messy breakup #and then crowley wants to keep going he's sad they broke up but aziraphale had issues with heaven or something so he's scared #every day i hurt my own feelings

[moonchild-in-blue]

Random thought I had last night. Genuinely think they're both equally outlandish - which is just ridiculous in itself if you think about it.

#ngl i think him wearing a shirt might be the most shocking thing he could do #lifting weights? shoving his tongue on the homies' throats? absolutely normal 👍 #a SHIRT?? a piece of garment covering his chest and tummy???? actual normal clothing???? no. absolutely not #but also. imagine he just says “hello” OMG i would flip #i'm not counting that small “thank you” on Wembley because those were exceptional circumstances #i mean a regular ritual were nothing bad happens. and he just decides to be verbal for once and go :::) hello 👋 #dew yew loike that? fancy seein' you 'ere #i don't know why i'm giving him a cockney accent. i know he talks more southern and posh but that's just funny #IF he did talk with us. do you think he'd be all “i have throughly enjoyed this ritual. we shall gather once more in this land with haste” #or he'd go full “yo yeah that's chill dawg” #be all “would you look at iii that wanker. that's my mate right there” #lmao idk what i'm saying. if this has a million typos IGNORE IT cus i'm writing this before bed and queuing for the morning #sleep token

[ancientbygone]

shall we renounce

from where we've come

and who we were?

#sleep token #sleep token art #sleep token vessel #sleep token sleep #sleep token him #bygone art #blood #blood tw #the most 'itself' this thing has ever been. the most it ever will be. #held together by vengefulness alone and pretending that it's something more than that #there isn't really vessel in there anymore. nor is there sleep. #it's both and neither. a mortal shell filled with barely controlled anger constantly threatening to burst. #it still tries to make itself a god. but all it's ever been and all it'll ever be is a mockery of both godhood and humanity. #a ticking time bomb of a joke. #i finished this while all of my body was in pain after a concert last night. god help me. #quick addition: #the caption is HEALTH lyrics again. while technically from DEMIGODS this specific case is intended to be the part from DSM-V #what can i say it fits Him quite well #'do unto those that which they did to you' is pretty much the reason why it came to be

[stairset]

I think the portrayal of Spider-Man 2099 in Across the Spider-Verse is in-character in that aside from like Shattered Dimensions he's always been portrayed as a bit of an asshole who slips into anti-hero territory at times and generally has a "needs of the many over the needs of the few" mindset and given his specific circumstances in the movie it's not unreasonable to think he could take the actions he does. However it does kinda suck that since like 99% of moviegoers had no idea who he was before the movie came out their first impression of him is when he's in an antagonistic role and people think "antagonist" and "villain" are synonyms so now I'm gonna have to listen to people who've never read a comic saying he's a villain or isn't a real Spider-Man for the rest of time or at least until he inevitably changes his mind in the third one.

#hell you don't even need to read a comic just look up a let's play of spider-man edge of time you'll get what i mean #but yeah i saw a post that was like #''the first movie had a joke about how spider-man doesn't wear a cape and miguel has a cape they did that to show he's not spider-man'' #as if he hasn't had that cape since his creation 30 fucking years ago #he's not even the only spider-man to have one. spider-man unlimited is also a thing that exists. #even the first movie had that call-back joke where they see the peter from miles's universe had a suit with a cape #these movies have a lot of little details with deeper meanings but the cape thing just isn't one of them sorry #but yeah. play edge of time or find it on youtube it's good. #shattered dimensions is also good but miguel's personality in that game is closer to peter's for some reason #so edge of time is better for getting a feel of what he's usually like #but yeah i do think spider-verse miguel was probably more straightforwardly heroic like other versions before the whole dead family thing #and i think he and the rest of the spider society are just genuinely misguided about how the whole canon event thing works #cause like george and gwen don't die in every universe peter doesn't get the symbiote in every universe #even uncle ben doesn't die in every universe #but miguel THINKS those things always happen. that's why he got the others to believe it cause he genuinely believes it himself #and i think they all take comfort in the idea that these bad things that happen to them happen for a reason #i know that's josh keaton's interpretation for why spectacular peter joined and i don't disagree with it #that's also why i disagree with people saying that miles is The Only True Spider-Man There just cause he was the first to outright reject it #look me in the fucking eye and tell me spectacular peter and insomniac peter don't understand what it means to be spider-man #or actually don't cause i'll bitch slap you into next week if you do #miguel o'hara #marvel #shut up tristan

[skunkes]

#prefacing this with I Know Spanish. i cant not know spanish‚ my parents don't speak english #but im the only one of my siblings that didnt get to go to school over there 🇲🇽 (just pre school) #adn the thing is like. my siblings wld talk to me in eng of course #(if they talked to me at all! what do u say to a baby when you're 9 12 and 15 yrs older.) #and my parents wld similarly jst not talk to me? i did not have conversations with them from birth to now lol. #thjere is something about how like. my sisters kids are also learning the languages at the same time #but when they mess up in spanish theyre corrected‚ by my sister (their mom)‚ my other sister‚ my parents #why not Me. why wasnt that extended to Me as a child... #the same reason I have the least amount of baby pictures while my siblings all have one full book each i bet #the same reason why my and my eldest sister are 15 yrs apart LOL #igts so crazy to me. i hate mentioning this bc people assume #im one of those ppl who isnt fluent bc their parents speak english and spanish and never taught them #my parents dont speak english❗❗❗❗ #my nephew thats older than me who is my fave family member and also only speaks spanish #is coming up on sunday idk that i can fully carry convo with him! #pure spanglish bc i didnt grow up having convos in it writing it reading it #thats why im so desperate to read books in spanish now. im so deeply ashamed #igts so crazy. i hate it. #saw a comment on smthng the other day thats like ''idk how u can have parents that only speak spanish and not know it lol'' #well can you take a guess. can u take a guess as to how that would happen via interactions. lack thereof. #idk why but its even more embarrassing this way. genuinely how cld u not know...? #its like i was born to feel isolated from my family in every single way...youngest by so many years #the language thing. the Hates Eating thing. the trans thing. most severe failure to launch #im so embarrassed to be alive....! #and i dont belong anywhere. and i am Alone wherever I am. #abandoned by direct and distant relatives. ancestors.

[robinsversion]

The most ironic thing to come out of having not one but multiple of my posts about the James Somerton situation that’s been blowing up over the past couple weeks, is people plagiarizing the additional commentary I put in the tags of those posts ON THE SAME FUCKING POSTS THEYRE USING THOSE TAGS ON

#y’all know I can see that in my notifications right? #it would be one thing if you indicated ‘previous tags’ in some way and commented on them #hell if you really like them screenshot them and add them to the post #and say ‘op you can’t just leave these in the tags’ like normal people do #or add a meme image response like someone did #(that made me crack up) #but to add them with no indication that they aren’t your original words #like #do you realize WHY Hbomberguy and more importantly James somerton started trending on here? #you were obviously reading through one of those tags to see my posts #hbomb would be disappointed in all of you #anyway #james somerton #hbomberguy #why are you booing me i’m right

[dyketubbo]

properly got the chance to read through the statements made by pomme dapper and ramons admins (plus admin 18s and some of the twitter update admins) and jeez i feel so bad for them but especially pommes admin. something incredibly sinister about focusing so much mistreatment on the admin who comes from the country where the union efforts are coming from while making merch of the character they played. capitalism is the enemy of creativity. whoever the people are that are removing admins without notice, theyre the ones that deserve to be removed from the project. not the egg/worker/animal admins that the whole fucking story is built on the backs of

#imagine being so fucking capitalism poisoned #that youd rather mistreat and kick off the people who help make the project what it is #than pay them for WORKING *DAILY* to keep the story going #what a fucking joke #mask mews #qsmp #hardly anyone is getting on the server. bads taking a break. a big part of why tubbos still getting on #is because of the tubbathon + he has to to work on his project #pierres on mostly to be afk and pac and phil get on rarely while other ccs just Arent getting on the server or are doing other things #and even when those who get on the server get on. they talk about missing the eggs. how much they wish they were there #qsmp did good for itself when the eggs werent around dont get me wrong #but the eggs are a GIGANTIC part of its success. it wouldnt be the same without them #you cant downplay how important they are to the very fucking structure of qsmp #especially because the egg admins also play the fed workers and animal characters #refuse to pay your workers what they deserve and eventually itll all fall apart. just because its a slow process with major corporations #doesnt mean itll be slow for smaller projects like this. thats just not how it works

[lumeha]

New reason unlocked for being pissed that Jeralt decided to just burn stuff down instead of, idk, talking to Rhea (ok I know why he didn't do that) or realising his kid was similar to his wife (??? there's NO way Sitri had a heartbeat she is literally Powered By A Crest Stone ??? Jeralt ???)

or

idk

leave in the middle of the night WITHOUT burning shit down actually

#barks.txt #:((( my dude BOOKS and CHRONICLES and ARCHIVES are important #like sure it's funny that Rhea is all “ooh we lost this knowledge (that I still have bc I was there)” #but at the same time #if those documents were chronicling things written by the Apostles for example #it IS a MASSIVE LOSS #she doesn't KNOW what went into their head directly #idk #jeralt #why #why did you do that

[prince-liest]

Yours was the first bottom Alastor fanfic I ever read and I was like woah, a whole new world… But I was wondering if you’re planning on ever writing Alastor indulging Vox and actually topping him? (He’d probably overheat and reboot at least twice during the ordeal)

Gonna be totally honest, probably not - and if I do, probably not the way you'd expect if you're a person who has specific top/bottom dynamics expectations!

Alastor's general progression in this fic series has been a slowly decreasing willingness to engage in more "lots of intimate body parts involved" sex acts because the more he tries them out, the more he realizes he could take or leave a lot of them. So I'm really unlikely to write him doing that unless it's with toys or something, purely because the way this fic series has progressed, he doesn't really have an interest in it!

To Vox's eternal regret, pfft. I'm kinda tempted to eventually take a hack at the subject, at least, regardless of how far along they get, and mesh that together with Alastor's extremely rudimentary understanding of what it means to be trans.

#ask #personal #Anonymous #nsft #my writing #hazbin hotel #also after watching the Genshin Impact top/bottom discourses from the sidelines #people asking about top/bottom stuff at all always makes me a little “I HOPE YOU DON'T HAVE THE EXPECTATIONS THOSE PEOPLE DID” looool #not assuming you do anon I'm just realizing how leery it made me in retrospect even tho nobody ever brought it to me #like I cannot emphasize enough how insane (and tbh homophobic) some of the shit I saw secondhand was #this is also why I tend to tag dom/sub most frequently and only sometimes include top/bottom #esp bc if you do appropriately differentiate those two things...the only time Vox has actually topped was the very first time they hooked u #when Alastor laughed himself silly #I write a lot of D/s but I also more frequently write non-penetrative sex anyway