#why do I have such a hard time setting my boundaries | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

not-poignant · 1 year

Note

Hi Pia,

I need some advice. I've been writing a story and posting it online and it's acquired a decent amount of readers.

I have this one character who is a secondary character, not a main, but they've become very popular with my readers and I've been getting many asks on when I'll be writing a story for this character, where they are the mc.

The problem is I don't feel the same way about this side character as my readers do. In fact I don't care much for them at all which I suppose is weird? I care about my main characters obviously but this side character is like... honestly I have no idea why they've become so popular. I've been trying to see them the way my readers see them, because surely there's a reason they've become a fan favourite, but I just... can't. It's so upsetting and frustrating because I love my main characters and want to focus on them but then I feel like I'm betraying my readership because they clearly want me to write a story about this character.

And then I feel angry at myself because why the hell can't I feel the same way about a character that I myself created? What's wrong with me?? Do I just need time to sit and flesh them out more? Will it take time for them to grow on me?

Anyway I would just really appreciate your thoughts on this. Have you ever created a character that you don't hate but don't particularly love either and then that character becoming extremely popular with readers?

How do you deal with that?

Thanks for reading my rant.

Hi anon,

There's actually a very simple answer to this which is (probably) going to make my response a lot shorter than your ask (probably not given how long my responses are).

You cannot make everyone happy because you are not all the same person. That's just...normal. It's normal. You're a human person and therefore have your own likes and dislikes, and other people who are not you have their own likes and dislikes, and our job in life isn't to make sure we all share exactly the same likes and dislikes.

Therefore all you have to do when people start talking to you about this other character is just go 'that's cool that you like them so much! I don't feel the same way though.' And if people are becoming too pushy in your comments, just make an author's note like 'please stop asking me to write stuff about (second character) because I don't want to and I'm getting tired of saying so, thanks!'

That's it. Done. You can find 100 ways to put down the boundary, but the idea that there is something wrong with you simply because you have preferences, is like, nope. Nothing wrong with you, stop giving yourself a hard time for being a human being.

Like in this instance, you are just a plain ordinary human being who has preferences like the rest of us and all you need to say is 'that isn't my preference' in the way that feels natural to you.

And yes, this happens to me a lot re: some of the characters I've made, in different permutations, and I'll I say - and have said in comments, ask responses and more - is 'that's cool that you like them so much, unfortunately I just don't feel the same way.' It's happening these days when people keep asking for Augus/Gwyn and I smile and say 'you have 1.5 million words of them, please go read it or write your own.' It happened all the way back when people cared way more about Bunnymund as a protagonist than I ever did or have since. And for every single really annoying 'will you ever make one of them get pregnant and have babies' request, I lay down a boundary.

That's a normal part of life, anon. People are different to you and have likes and preferences of their own. Sometimes they'll try and persuade you to share in those likes. And sometimes you will and you'll feel inspired. But not sharing in them is completely normal.

You deal with it by having boundaries, anon, that respect your preferences. :)

Tl;dr - You are not other people. Stop trying to become other people. Stop giving yourself a hard time for not being other people. Respect what you like and dislike, and set your boundaries accordingly.

PS: You invented the character as a secondary character, that's probably why you don't feel like writing them as a primary character; as it was never their/your intention in the first place. It's normal to not feel the same way for them / about them!

#asks and answers #on writing #on fanfiction #tbh my response to this was going to be really short #which was basically like your job in life isn't to make sure your likes and dislikes unify with everyone else's #even if it's your readers and you want to make them happy #instead of seeing it as a pressure to write the character as a primary character #why not instead choose to see it as a compliment that they love your character construction so much #that they daydream about your characters getting stories of their own #when folks get to that point #i start encouraging them to write and draw what they want to see in the world #because like - i'm not going to do it - i already have the stories i want to write #but it's also very like humbling and flattering that they love this character #that you don't even really like that much #instead of giving yourself a hard time #see it as the compliment to your writing and characterisation that it is #and then set down your boundary #if you're getting a LOT of these requests #i would be putting in an author's note on a future chapter #or just deleting comments that *only* ask you to write stuff #you're not interested in writing #the answer here is to have a boundary #not to become other people

15 notes · View notes

thotsfortherapy · 1 year

Text

bruh I had a social for my club and my housemate ruined the vibes so bad like. The way I feel like I need to send out a mass apology for their behaviour now :////

#cy says stuff #personal #idk man they are an asshole and they were making everyone very uncomfortable #and it's like idk what to tell you you are being mean. i don't care if it's in the context of a game no one is having fun anymore #they literally made my other housemate cry because of how aggressive they were being about it #like how can you not tell you are literally ruining this for everyone bro #my friend texted me afterwards like YIKES and we were looking at each other like 👀👀 the entire night so that was reassuring #but yeah this is why I'm literally never home anymore because they are so draining to be around and all they do is cause problems LMAO #i will probably have to have a conversation about it but it's very difficult because I've already tried setting boundaries so many times #and if I didn't live with them i would literally cut them out so fast #last time i tried to set boundaries they were like ugh I'm so sorry but it totally wasn't a representation of who i actually am #like i was just having a really bad week :(((((#and I'm like that is not an excuse to be awful to your friends #if you are only a good friend when you're in a good mood and then take all your negative emotions out on the ppl around you #but yeah it's also hard because i genuinely do not want to continue this relationship but I'm renting with them at the moment #so I'm just avoiding them as much as possible #just like 🙄 it's so annoying #venting #rant

4 notes · View notes

kindacreepy-kindaugly · 11 months

Text

I thought maybe it was getting a bit better slowly but actually I think it's just been getting worse again

#can this brain maybe reiterate why it was necessary to have him here. why he has to keep doing this shit.#it's not about me now it's silk but it's bad again n we just keep goin back lookin for some fucking closure or something #plus not going feels like we're just running away from our problems #as if just lettin him do whatever he wants is any better #you try to set boundaries you try to negotiate but it doesn't really do much in the end #for the past few days i've been havin a hard time even remembering it hasn't all been my fault. i didn't ask for all or even most of it.#i don't wanna become this heavy weight dragging down everyone around me but fuck if it hasn't been gettin bad again #spdrvent

0 notes

unpackingmyshit · 1 year

Text

Why can’t people see what I see

#9 years is a long time and you said yourself it’s been a while since you saw each other.#no one owes anyone anything of course but this feels like a boundary set too far #i know I’m close to the situation #people treat me like I’m some sort of victim when the truth is #I’ve never felt more sure in my life that this relationship is right for me #I don’t feel like I’m compromising on my wants #I feel understood in ways I cannot articulate #why can’t people see the way things truly are #I don’t know what it is. I just know he sometimes tries too hard because he’s afraid everyone around him hates him #it felt wrong telling him for you #it felt like actually you should tel him yourself. why am I enforcing boundaries that you should set with someone directly #fear of conflict is one thing but making me do your dirty work is another #he’s a good person. it just comes across like you can’t forgive him #but then why am I surprised by that when you have never been a forgiving person #you write people out of your life before you tell them there’s a problem.#you set lines in the sand and never cross them before talking to people with the honesty we all deserve.#now it feels like I’m looking over my shoulder and I’m on the fucking Truman show #like ok. you have been holding a grudge for 6 #3 #and 8 years #now those are bigger in your head than his personhood is

0 notes

lightningfilledsaber · 1 year

Text

BPD fucking sucks ×2

#mud rambles #injust cant fucking take it anymore #why does being healthy mean i dont get closure #why does being healthy mean i dont get an actual fucking apology. or change #why does being healthy mean accepting that the people around me wont change #all i fucking wanted was an OUNCE of what i was giving #all i fucking wanted was SOMETHING #and yet time and fucking time again i get NOTHING #im too fucking much for people???? i give and i give and i fucking give #i listen. and i learn. and i change. and i NEVER fucking get that in return #im doing my fucking best and because of that i seem to fucking attract people at their fucking worst #which. i fucking get it okay. ive been at my worst SO MUCH #BUT FUCKING CHANGE #BE BETTER. DO BETTER. IT'S NOT FUCKING HARD #WHY DO I HAVE TO BE A GOOD PERSON AND YET BE TREATED LIKE IM THE FUCKING BAD GUY #WHY AM I MADE INTO THE FUCKING BAD GUY #BECAUSE I BREAK???#I KNOW I HAVE AN ISSUE WITH SETTING BOUNDARIES BUT IVE BEEN WORKING ON THAT! AND REGARDLESS.#THATS NOT A FUCJING EXCUSE TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!#why. why why why why why is it so fucking hard to be good?????#the BEING good isnt the hard part its the fucking. SHIT you deal with from other people #all ive ever wanted was to be good why the fuck do people hurt me because of it #i can recognize that there are and have been good people in my life and i love them so much #but why the fuck is it that the shitty people leave the most impact on me???#how is it fair that i cant fucking trust ANYONE because of the people who hurt me???#im a good fucking person. i know theyre good fucking people. but. i also let myself believe the shitty ones were good #what if im doing the same thing??#idk i just. i cant. i cant anymore. it's so fucking hard to keep giving when everything gets taken from me so fucking much #and i know ive done shitty things and have been a shitty person but i LISTEN. i CHANGE. i LEARN. HOLY. FUCK.#maybe it's my fucking fault. maybe this is what i get for being a shitty teen

1 note · View note

astrobydalia · 6 months

Text

🍂Cozy observations 🎃

Itssss fall you guys!!!! 🥰🥰🥰🥰 It’s actually super hot still where I live but that won’t stop me from living my cozy era. Anyways, I want to avoid collecting posts on my drafts for centuries so here’s more general observations!

work by astrobydalia

🍂Aquarius placements are simultaneously the most understanding and empathetic people ever and the biggest assholes out there. I don't know how they pull that contradiction off but it's true (I mean this in the best way possible btw)

Moreover, I’ve noticed Aquarius placements are way more appreciative of kindness and social harmony than Libra tbh. Libra's desire for harmony can be just for the sake of keeping appearances but they are actually very judgmental. Aquarius on the other hand tend to appreciate authenticity and have a “live and let live” philosophy where they accept people unconditionally that’s why they attract popularity. Underdeveloped Aquarius tho do have a tendency to break social harmony due to pick-me behavior

🍂 Cardinal moons are serial daters. I swear every person I’ve met who had a rather active love life or were always crushing on someone was more often than on Cardinal moon

Also, Cardinal moons are always very dominant people even when don’t intend to be. They have a very summoning aura/personality that just demands engagement. They also tend to be social butterflies, even when they’re introverted they always end up surrounded by people somehow

🍂 I like to think Pisces is the final movie while Virgo is all the behind the scenes and editing

🍂I've seen this endless times where people with Mars in Libra or 7th house always end up either in law or business (mostly creating their own business, freelancers, entrepreneurs, etc)

🍂Any Venusian influence on the MC/10th house/6th house indicates a career or job where you’re required to dress up and appear very put together, having a certain aesthetic can be important in your career

🍂Saturn square or opposite MC/10th house ruler indicates the native was forced into a career they never chose/wanted in the first place or they had to wait a long time to finally have the opportunity to pursue their ideal career OR the path towards the career they chose could have been harder/more unfulfilling than they expected

🍂 I also like to think Taurus stops to smell the flowers and creates a flower bed for herself. Virgo studies the flowers and learns all about photosynthesis and shit. Capricorn creates a flower business and monopolizes the flower market

🍂 Those with Mars influence on their moon (Moon-Mars aspects, Aries/Scorpio moon) are really good at throwing shade but they’re unable to take it themselves. They don’t like to feel called out.

🍂 Mars in the 12th house people will 👏🏼hold 👏🏼 grudges 👏🏼

🍂 To be quite honest with you, every single Virgo sun I’ve met had a very standoffish personality.

🍂 Saturn retrograde individuals raised themselves. That’s why this placement is known to have issues with authority and discipline because their parents didn’t really parent them at all, so they had to set their own boundaries, rules and systems to navigate life. Getting their life together and materializing their ambitions could take extra effort for them

🍂 I usually like Capricorn Moons cause I always find that they are very loyal to everyone (friends, family, partner, etc) but honestly they are not as emotionally mature as you might think. They have a really hard time moving on from the past to the point where they can stay stuck in their wounded child self and spend a big chunk of their lives trying to overcompensate this with work, productivity and success. Tendency to depression, low emotional intelligence and being emotionally stunted. Deep down they feel like the victim of their own story

🍂 Aquarius sun+Scorpio moon: I’ve met quite a few people with this combo and with all of them I’ve noticed they always have a cult leader kinda mentality towards their friendships and connections (might apply to Aquarius+Scorpio combos in general). You’re either with them or against them. If you're not a follower they’ll hit you with the "cool kids table" attitude

🍂 My mom has Mercury in the 4th house and she once said "I don't mind moving abroad but I can't live in a place where people don't speak my native language. I need to hear my native language"

🍂 When it’s said that Venus in the 1st house people know how to make themselves look good it doesn’t mean just physically. The know how to present themselves as a more virtuous person than they actually are...

🍂Mutable risings, Mars in a mutable sign/house: their motto is “work smarter not harder”. Their first instinct will always be to find a way around challenges and difficulties. They usually aren’t the most action oriented people, but they are cunning. Their way to success is basically beating the system to make things easier for themselves.

🍂I can easily recognize Taurus Sun because they always ooze BDE. Also they always tend to have very rugged and bold physique/features

🍂From what I've seen Gemini Venus is a placement that easily makes someone stereotypically extroverted. Golden retriever energy

🍂Has anyone else noticed that succedent houses (aka fixed houses) are all related to money and wealth in some way?

2nd house: your resources, what spend your money on 5th house: gamble 8th house: shared resources, investments and debt 11th house: production of wealth

🍂All Gemini and Cancer risings I’ve met had some sort of hypersensitivity to stimuli. Gemini rising is more mental; anxiety, overthinking, information overload, etc they easily get triggered by immediate stimuli, specially noise around them. For Cancer risings this manifests more in the senses (photosensitivity, very sensitive to smells, flavors, etc) and heightened intuition just like Spiderman with spider-sense

🍂I’m sorry but why are Cancer Mercuries so elusive in their communication??? Everything they say has this "well, maybe. I don't know" or "I guess" undertone to it, they never openly say what they really mean. They are good listeners tho

🍂Underdeveloped Taurus placements feel entitled to use and dispose of people to benefit themselves. Tend to be very selfish and stingy. They do something for you they'll hang it over your head forever and act like they have ownership over you. You do something for them, they owe you nothing.

🍂Pisces Moons grew up in their own little bubble. It's very likely they missed out on 'normal' mundane experiences and this makes them feel very separated from the rest of the world and the rest of the people which is why they often come off as clueless and disconnected. They often give off the impression they've been living under a rock or a parallel universe. A perfect example of this is when Kim Kardashian said she's never been to a grocery store💀

Every single Pisces moon I’ve met never ever wanted to have kids and if they do have them they tend to not be too present in their kids’ lives. The harsh truth is pisces moons are not reliable, generally they are the ones who want to be saved and cared for

🍂I've noticed earth Venus and Venus-Saturn aspects are a little bit too good at showing contempt. To some degree they always remind me of Disgust from the Inside Out movie 😂

🍂 When I see Moon-Saturn conjunction in a chart I flinch a little tbh cause idk what’s worse the fact that their mothers couldn’t be bothered to give the native any sort of emotional comfort or the fact that these natives have normalized conditional love as the only kind of love possible. I've also noticed they grew up with strong authoritarian values and were never allowed to question hierarchies or status

Also, natives with Moon-Saturn conjunction are extremely shady people if you ask me. It's true they are insanely observant but what people don't seem to notice is that they are observant in a Joe Goldberg or Light Yagami kind of way without the murder They do be having inner monologues like that. They come across as calm, intelligent, respectful and trusted. Can use emotional expression (theirs and others') in strategic ways to influence others. Big tendency towards materialistic, utilitarian and/or elitist mindset too. I can't quite put my finger on it but I've met a lot of people with this aspect and the deeper I dig the more I keep feeling something very dark and/or disingenuous about them

🍂Venus square Neptune people and their lack of self-respect… 🙁

🍂Aquarius Moons always give off the impression of having a rather lazy or passive personality. I'm not talking about their productivity but the fact that they seem to always have a "meh" attitude towards everything to the point where they can feel a bit disconnected similar to pisces moon

🍂Virgo risings often have freelance jobs due to Aquarius ruling their 6th house

🍂People with Industria rx (389) may actually dislike their work environment even if they like their job. I’ve noticed they often find the industry they work in to be toxic, depleting or too demanding

🍂Enterprise rx (9777) might always feel unsatisfied with their position, they might be the type to always want more and more

🍂 Aries Moon women and always attracting very immature and selfish men omg I've seen this time and time again

🍂 Scorpio moon/Moon 8th house is an underrated wealth indicator imo. I've noticed they always have a "from rags to riches" kinda life story. They however often face issues with fraud or debt along the way cause they have a tendency to take huge financial risks

🍂 you ever heard about the crabs in a bucket phenomenon? Well Ive actually observed underdeveloped 4th house placements do tend to have this kind of clingy and envious behavior particularly towards people that are really close to them. You can also experience this with people you have 4th house Synastry with; you get too attached to the comfort zone they provide to the point where they stifle your growth

🍂Pisces placements 🤝 falling for people who are bluntly abusive, controlling and narcissistic. They want to believe they’re living a beauty and the beast love story when in reality they’re trauma bonding

🍂Libra/Taurus Mars people ARE problematic and petty as fuck, they’re just good at the social game and making it look like they didn't do anything. Underdeveloped Venus energy is the opposite of peaceful, it gives major mean girl vibes and Mars being debilitated in these signs easily brings out this hostile side of Venus. The type to passively instigate drama just to make themselves look better. Very hypocritical

🍂What natives with Saturn in Taurus will consider first when choosing a career is make sure that it is well payed and gives them financial status. Other factors come second

🍂Fixed+cardinal combo in the luminaries is hands down the best sun-moon combo I've seen tbh (specially fixed sun+cardinal moon), they're a force to be reckoned with. Very charismatic, outspoken and confident people with healthy ego if developed. Most people I've met with this combo were very extroverted and/or excellent leaders

🍂Sagittarius placements 🤝 this pose 😜✌🏼

🍂Libra/7th house Lilith have a tendency to judge a book by its cover all the time

🍂I've noticed Pisces MC/10th house natives aren't very ambitious. They seem to not really care about things like self-development or being on top. From what I've seen they mostly aspire to have a pleasant and glamurous life that frees them form real life mundane worries and could desire to retire as early as possible. In some cases I've seen they could want a "princess" kinda lifestyle where they literally have no responsibilities. They want a career that liberates them from any pressure of achieving material expectations and allows them to just go brain dead all the time following a higher power/inspiration/knowledge. That's why many artists have this placements and I've also seen cases of Pisces MC people who wanted to be nuns and nurses. I've noticed that when they genuinely don't care about recieving recognition or achievements but rather do things bc it aligns with their soul that's when they become successful

🍂Scorpio placements have a tendency to be very cynical I've noticed, specially mercury and mars

🍂Gemini/3rd house Lilith can spot lies from miles away and will not be sacred to call it out

🍂As per my observation the water sign that gets idolized the most is not Pisces but Cancer 100%. Yes Pisces does get idolized but I’ve noticed that’s actually very short-lived, people tend to switch up on them SO fast cause they project a deeply unrealistic image on them and eventually fall off the pedestal. Cancer placements on the other hand are not infantized like Pisces, they are consistently very sought after people I’ve observed. They always come across as emotionally reliable even when they’re not, people always go soft for them while simultaneously respecting them so they’re always seen as perfect,kind,charming,etc. Their personality naturally portrays an energy of unconditional love and understanding so people easily get obsessed and addicted to them

🍂I always find that Pisces Venus natives have a very whimsical and juvenile personality. They also have a very extravagant taste they may like anything with bright colors, glittery shiny stuff, squishy toys, etc. they have a tendency to be a bit tacky and corny I’ve noticed

🍂Every fixed moon I've seen avoided any sort of emotional rehabilitation like the plague unless it’s strictly necessary. They believe no one can begin to understand them better than themselves and they got it all figured out already. Now this is more my opinion but I feel like they low-key underestimate the amount of healing they actually need to do cause they really struggle taking emotional accountability. They have a tendency to act like their needs and feelings justify everything so there's not much to "fix" or heal

🍂People who have at least 2 out of their big 3 in cardinal signs are often seen as the golden girl/boy

🍂Capricorn/Virgo moons will be literally the best at what they do and make it seem so effortless. If you ask them how they got so successful they'll be like "idk I guess I just practiced a lot"

🍂I’ve noticed your 8th house sign(s) represent themes that people are consistently using against you as the fastest way to tear you down, so you always end up feeling powerless here at some point. That’s why you tend to resent this energy and have toxic dynamics with people who have their planets here. This house is literally the death of you (8th from 1st), but it can also be the source of your empowerment once you claim this energy so it's best that you keep this house to yourself as much as possible. Some examples:

Gemini 8th house: using what you say against you. you could have a hard time with people believing your words, what you say is always scandalous and/or rubs people the wrong way. Gossip or information that makes you look bad. People always think you’re lying or deceiving or have ulterior motives Cancer 8th house: you could struggle with getting sympathy and emotional support from people. Others think you’re just being vulnerable and complaining for clout. Any display of emotion or care will be seen as manipulative. People trying to break or ruin your relationship with your family or closed ones Capricorn 8th house: you struggle with people respecting you, others don't take you seriously and don't see you as a valid authority. Any attempt to make yourself respected will be seen as dictatorial or elitist behavior, any desire to succeed will be seen as you being power hungry. People try to dismiss or belittle your achievements

work by astrobydalia

#astrology #astro #astro observations #astro notes #zodiac #birth chart #astrobydalia

2K notes · View notes

springtrappd · 9 months

Text

kellen goff (voice of glamrock freddy, the daycare attendant/sun/moon and funtime freddy) has spoken out on twitter re: ai replicas of his voice. if you continue to produce or consume ai reproductions of his work, you are not only explicitly violating his boundaries, but you are contributing to a culture that will make it more difficult for him to continue to gain sustainable work in the future. now that he's made them known, let's please respect his wishes regarding the matter.

full text of thread beneath the cut for brevity:

I do not consent to any AI reproduction of my voice. I respectfully ask any who provide AI TTS services to delete the voices of those who didn't consent. Will that stop anyone? Hell no. Why would it? It's not illegal. It should be, but it's not. Hopefully someday, but not yet. People are a-ok violating others. They'll justify it any way they can. We've seen it time and time again, and we've seen that again today. I'm so sorry, Erica. You did not deserve the onslaught that came from setting up a boundary. Maybe one day, we'll get legislation on it. Maybe not. In the meantime, let me make this clear: If you use AI text to speech that originated from a VA that never consented to it, my opinion of you will lower significantly. If that doesn't matter to you, oh well. Can't stop you. But if you respect what we do and how hard we had and have to work to get here and keep it going, please reconsider. It really makes us uncomfortable, and encourages companies to devalue what we do more and more. Look at Secret Invasion. It's already happening. You can say no. I already see Glamrock Freddy covers of songs on YouTube and TikTok. You may think it's harmless fun, but in the long run, you're going to see more and more VAs disappear. If that's your goal, well done. You found the way. If it isn't, I encourage you to help us push against it. Anyway, that's my word on it. I tried to state it respectfully as I could. I'm a firm believer in treating others the way you want to be treated. We'll see how many hold that same principle I guess.

#fnaf #daycare attendant #glamrock freddy #five nights at freddy's #fnaf sb #speaking!#(hope i did the alt text right!)#but yeah don't do this shit #ESPECIALLLLYYYY for h/orny shit #vas are real people with real jobs and real identities #not objects in your fantasies #there is a word for forcing people into s/exual situations they did not consent to!#and you're not gonna like what it is!

2K notes · View notes

moonkissedvisions · 28 days

Text

PAC ♡ 𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐚 𝐦𝐢𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐫: 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐣𝐞𝐜𝐭 ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆ please read:

Hey! welcome to another reading. This reading includes the following questions, I drew one card for each of them: -How do you see yourself? -How do you think others see you? -How do you project yourself to others? -How can you improve your projection/image? -Who/How are you, really? Use your own intuition and discernment to read my interpretations. Remember that this is a general reading so not everything has to resonate. This reading was only made for guidance and entertainment, it´s not a replacement for professional advice of any kind. I use a Rider-Waite deck and you can ask me about the cards if they aren´t named in the reading. Check out my other readings at the end of this post and consider liking/reblogging/following if you liked this one.

ʚ♡ɞ Now, look for your pile and hope you enjoy it. ʚ♡ɞ

♡ Pile 1

How do you see yourself?

You see yourself as a joyful person who likes to have fun and juggle many things at once. You view yourself as adaptable, dynamic, and fast-paced. You strive to maintain balance in your life. Perhaps you see yourself as someone who is too agitated, trying to keep everything together but struggling with a bit of messiness. You are worried that you can't always solve every problem or you aren't versatile enough. You are practical and you tend to take too much at once, but you know you are good at that.

How do you think others see you?

You believe that others perceive you as a resilient and strong individual who has gone through many challenges in life. You think they see you as a warrior who can endure any obstacle that comes your way. You also believe that you excel at setting boundaries and people recognize your persistence, ability to push forward, durability, and unwavering stance on important matters.

What do you project?

You project that you are struggling emotionally. maybe you suffered from heartbreak recently and that's why others see you struggling. When you experience heartbreak, loss, or betrayal, it can be difficult to hide the impact it has on you. Often, others can sense that you are not feeling your best. This may be due to your facial expressions, gestures, and body language projecting your sorrow, depression, or grief. However, others may also sense that you possess the strength to endure emotional pain and anguish, and that you have the capacity to cope with difficult times and emotions. Despite the challenging circumstances, they can see that you are getting through it.

How can you improve your image?

To build a positive image, focus on developing self-confidence, optimism, and a sense of self-assurance. Recognize your own strengths, resilience, and determination, and celebrate your successes and progress with others. Cultivate a positive self-image by showcasing your talents, achievements, and skills, and don't be afraid to reward yourself for your hard work. By accepting love and attention from others, you can build strong and supportive relationships that will help you achieve your goals and thrive in life. Remember, with dedication and perseverance, you can create a positive image that reflects your true potential and inspires others to do the same.

Who/How are you?

Whether it's in the present, past or an ongoing experience, you may have encountered a sense of loss, betrayal, heartbreak or any other kind of ending that has left you feeling defeated, physically and mentally exhausted, unable to react, powerless, discouraged, and sad. It's a feeling that things have come to an end and a new beginning is approaching. You may feel resigned to this situation, and it may have taken you by surprise. Someone or something may have hurt you deeply, and you may feel like there is nothing you can do about it. But with time, a new beginning will approach, and you'll be able to start your life anew. ♡

♡ Pile 2

How do you see yourself?

You perceive yourself as someone who is often lost in thought, too absorbed in your mind to notice what is happening around you. Perhaps you are moody, bored, or indifferent. You don't seem to experience gratitude or joy for anything in particular. You may overanalyze things and miss out on opportunities as a result. You see yourself as someone who is introspective and contemplative, but you struggle to feel content or fulfilled. You don't have a passion or feel emotionally connected to anything. You may be stuck in a negative/lack mindset and find it difficult to appreciate what you already have.

How do you think others see you?

You believe that others perceive you as a patient, moderate, balanced, and a calm person. You think that people see you as someone who enjoys going on adventures and embracing all kinds of experiences. Additionally, you think that others view you as open-minded, flexible, and capable of accepting diverse opinions and ways of living. You don't consider yourself as a person who thinks in black and white, but rather as someone who avoids extreme points of view. Perhaps you believe that people see you as someone who is not vengeful, holds no grudges, and is diplomatic and stable.

What do you project?

You exude calmness and balance while projecting emotional intelligence and the ability to empathize with people's feelings. You possess the skills to help others with their emotional problems and have the ability to connect with your own emotions and creativity. People feel heard and understood when they talk to you, and you have a reassuring presence that can comfort and uplift them. You healthily express your emotions and are unafraid of being perceived as sensitive or emotional. You have a strong intuition that enables you to read others' emotions accurately and know when someone needs support. You are a loving, artistic, and magnetic individual who is capable of dreaming big and inspiring others with your creativity and passion.

How can you improve your image?

Be ready to unleash your inner child by embracing your childlike wonder and free-spirited personality. Ignite your adventurous side and discover new horizons with an open and curious mind. Don't let a lack of enthusiasm hold you back - break free from routine and indulge your curiosity. Follow what intrigues you. Get out of your head, and look at the bright side. The key to finding your passion is to approach life with a playful attitude and a desire to explore new ideas. Don't take yourself too seriously and don't worry about making sense of everything. You don't need to get attached to something to find it fun. Work on your fears. As you embrace your journey, you'll inspire others to follow your lead and tap into their own sense of wonder. Let humor be your guide and start smiling more as you uncover all the exciting experiences that await you.

Who/How are you?

You possess a reflective, methodical, and calm personality. You are someone who doesn't rush into things and takes their time to contemplate and evaluate the situation before action. You are careful with your work and like to commit yourself fully to it. You are a perfectionist. Your introspective and composed nature allows you to think through things deeply and come up with practical solutions. You value your work and like to reflect on the outcome, which helps you learn from your experiences and grow. You are intellectually practical and don't take any risks without careful planning. You are a patient, dedicated, and meticulous individual who values quality work and likes to appreaciate the fruits of their labor.

♡ Pile 3

How do you see yourself?

You see yourself as someone who possesses a remarkable collaborative personality that enables you to effortlessly blend the energies and abilities of all team members, resulting in outstanding project outcomes. Your ability to work in teams is a testament to your skill and capability. You are focused, dedicated, and driven to succeed, with a good eye for detail and a talent for employing practical skills to achieve your goals. Your meticulous planning and thoughtful consideration of all aspects of a project reflect your reliability and conscientious nature. You are aware of your strong work ethic, combined with your friendly and trustworthy demeanor. You are highly committed to your work, practical, and reliable which inspires confidence in your abilities.

How do you think others see you?

You may feel like others don't fully understand you or perceive you accurately. It's possible that you have an unclear sense of your own identity, or that your identity is constantly changing based on your emotions or what's currently going on in your life. This can make it difficult for others to get a clear picture of who you are, and you may feel misunderstood. You might even feel like you can't be your true self, or that there isn't a true version of you that you can show to people. It's possible that you feel like others see you as fake or delusional, or that they pick up on your insecurities and emotional struggles so their perception of you is clouded by emotional projections. You may worry that you confuse people or that they have false beliefs and wrong ideas about you.

What do you project?

You might unknowingly convey your inner feelings of doubt and unease to those around you. Perhaps you are currently low on energy, and those around you can sense that you are feeling defeated. You might be projecting an absence of assertiveness in your communication and actions, indicating that you are unsure of your ability to win your battles and succeed. It's also possible that you are projecting a lack of confidence in yourself and your boundaries, giving off the impression that you are easily giving up and that you don't stand up for yourself. Maybe others perceive you as someone who starts unnecessary conflicts and behaves recklessly. You may also be projecting a lack of experience and commitment, which could result in you frequently stepping back from challenging situations. Overall, you project insecurity and a lack of motivation.

How can you improve your image?

To improve your image, you must embrace the unknown and uncertainty with boldness, readiness, and vitality. Identify the factors that are holding you back and draining your energy. Instead of wasting your time and focusing on insecurities, learn to be assertive, spontaneous, and willing to take risks. Redirect your focus intelligently. Feel the fear, and do it anyway. Trust in your ability to overcome any challenge that comes your way. Don't hold back your wild side; be authentic and unapologetic. Take care of your health and engage in sports that will help you gain confidence and vigor. Expand yourself and seek ways to grow instead of limiting yourself. Remember, you are capable of achieving anything you set your mind to.

Who/How are you?

You may be currently undergoing a process of healing, or are considering such a journey. You are beginning to view your pain, struggle, and grief in a new light, and as a result, you are experiencing a sense of release from emotional pain. You are starting to feel more peaceful and serene, and you are gaining a deeper sense of self-awareness. You are recovering from a past event that has had a profound impact on you, and you are gaining hope and faith in your healing journey. You are engaging in various forms of emotional release, such as journaling, meditation, or talking to someone. You help others to heal by sharing your own journey. You are attuned to your feelings and learning to experience them, rather than trying to control or over-analyze them. You are someone who is overcoming emotional obstacles and developing a sense of self-acceptance and inner peace. Your journey of healing is a testament to your strength and resilience, and serves as an inspiration to others who may be going through similar experiences.

♡ Pile 4

How do you see yourself?

You appear to be someone who possesses a strong sense of willpower. You are confident in your abilities to manifest your desires and you have all the resources at your disposal to achieve your goals. Your skills and creativity are impressive, and you possess the strategic prowess and focus to make things happen. You also possess a sense of empowerment and cunning, which makes you a natural leader with a flair for innovation.

Your persuasive and analytical abilities have made you a force to be reckoned with, and you are well aware of your power and influence. However, you may have noticed that this energy is not always directed in a positive direction. You may have used your persuasive abilities to manipulate, control, or deceive others, rather than using them to inspire and motivate. Perhaps you have struggled to channel your creativity in a way that benefits yourself and others, and as a result, you may have suppressed it altogether. You may also feel that you lack consistency in your endeavors, which can lead to wasted potential or a lack of progress. You may struggle to be honest and coherent with your thoughts and actions, which can lead to a sense of confusion or frustration. Despite these challenges, you deeply understand that you have the potential to overcome them and tap into your full potential.

How do you think others see you?

You believe that others perceive you as a deep and dynamic individual, characterized by a continual process of transformation and evolution in your life. You feel that they recognize your innate ability to undergo significant metamorphoses and serve as a catalyst for change. You sense that others regard you as someone who wields profound influence, capable of instigating transformative shifts within themselves and their surroundings. You believe that people perceive your resilience and profound depth, viewing you as a revolutionary figure who fosters renewal and facilitates healing processes. You think others see you as a radical person.

What do you project?

You appear to be experiencing a sense of detachment from your expertise and proficiency. You project that your level of engagement with your work has diminished compared to previous times. Your attention and organizational skills seem to be faltering, leaving others with a feeling of uncertainty regarding your reliability and dependability. It appears that practicality eludes you, and you are out of harmony with those around you, resulting in a lack of confidence in your abilities both professionally and in your daily pursuits. Your friends or colleagues may detect a noticeable disconnect, sensing that you are not resonating on the same wavelength as before and that your connection with them has weakened. Don't take this as a further discouraging message. Remember that this is also part of your journey so embrace it, and seek to realign at your own pace. You may be projecting this however it doesn't have to be the truth about you.

How can you improve your image?

Enhancing your image begins with embracing both your triumphs and setbacks, as they are integral parts of your journey toward personal and professional growth. By acknowledging and learning from your experiences, you pave the way for self-improvement and evolution. Make time for introspection, allowing yourself to release any burdens and cultivate gratitude for the lessons learned. Reclaim your power by reframing disappointments as opportunities for growth and resilience. Stay proactive in seeking out avenues for advancement and expansion. Re-center yourself by decluttering not only your physical surroundings but also your mental and spiritual spaces. Through this deliberate process of self-care and empowerment, you position yourself to thrive and radiate confidence in all aspects of your life. Remember that you can't grow new flowers until the old ones have decomposed into soil. Focus on growing new flowers, not in the decomposed old ones.

Who/How are you?

You have a vibrant persona thar radiates humor, making interactions with you a delight. You exude a carefree optimism that uplifts those around you. Your approach to life is characterized by a refreshing lack of attachment to material possessions, opting instead to savor experiences with an insatiable curiosity and boundless enthusiasm. You embrace each moment as an opportunity for joy and discovery. Recognizing the analogy of life to a perpetual celebration, you conscientiously cultivate an attitude of a gracious host, ensuring that every encounter is filled with warmth and vitality. Your capacity to maintain a lighthearted perspective, coupled with an unwavering focus on the bright side of life, reflects a remarkable depth of wisdom and resilience. You have an infectious smile and unforgettable laughter, and you embrace your childlike wonder.

Thank you for supporting my blog. I love you.

CHECK OUT MY OTHER READINGS

Discover your NATAL BIRTH CARDS

Astro notes

Your beauty and how to enhance it

The Divine Feminine messages

Your natural gifts and talents

600 notes · View notes

cherubfae · 2 months

Note

Hello! I love your writing, it's so cute! Here's an Idea bouncing around in my head: Reader is a shy and easily flustered individual who's developed a crush on Alastor. However they try to keep their distance as they know he's Aro/Ace and doesn't want to overstep boundaries. They go to Lucifer a (somewhat) expert on romance and feelings of longing to vent, also developing a crush on Lucifer- (Reader is a hopeless romantic lol)

Anyway, hope you have a nice day and remember to drink water!

|| The Price of Love || Alastor x Reader x Lucifer

tags: gn!sinner!reader, fluff, hurt/comfort, love triangle, miscommunication, blood/injuries, mild nudity mention, divorced!Luci, I had to make it a bit comical, I made this too angsty for my own liking now I'm sad 😭, protective bois

This is a one shot. I won't be writing a part two. Thank you! :)

A dreamy sigh echoes from your lips, swirling down the empty hallway. You're sitting on your bed with your knees pulled to your chest with a clawed hand over your heart. Sometimes you miss the thrum of your heartbeat against your fingers. With all of the people occupying Hell, you didn't expect to feel quite this lonely.

You stare down at the pocket watch in your hands. Such a tiny device cost quite a fortune, but it was a true antique having been manufactured in the 1920s. Your intention was to give it to Alastor. Yet, you never did.

Despite everything in your being wanting you to give him the simple gift, a token of your love and your friendship, you just couldn't. You were already internally setting yourself up for a failure that may not even come. You weren't sure Alastor would ever be into someone, let alone you. So, allowing these thoughts to fester you withdrew yourself from him. Forcing smiles when around him and the others, faking laughter; all of which Alastor could see right through. Every time he tried to seek you out, to confront you, you were already engaged with someone else or another task for the hotel.

You were actively allowing your depression to swallow you whole all the whole not realizing that if you had only asked, Alastor's feelings are the same as yours. He just didn't know how to approach you and Rosie thought it best to let you come to him; yet you never did. Even Alastor was finding it a bit hard to keep that smile on his face. Why won't you just approach him? He...He can't do it. Please.

A dreary day in Hell with violent lightning and thunderclouds and acidic rain brought you into the company of Lucifer Morningstar himself. He could smell your sadness from miles away and like clockwork, he instantly pulls you under his wings.

"Now then, sweetling, what brings you to see the Big Boss Man Himself?" Lucifer grins, crossing his leg over his knee nursing an apple martini with an apple slice hanging off the sugar-dusted edge. He serves you whatever drink you may like, alcoholic or non-alcoholic.

"I'm in love with Alastor and I don't know what to do! I'm scared to get too close to him because I'm not even sure he's into me like that and I don't want to get hurt!" You sob, the words come pooling out of your mouth like a waterfall and so do the tears.

Lucifer visibly bristles at the mention of his rival, almost choking on his drink. With a snap of his fingers, his martini glass vanishes with a poof! His full attention now on you. Gently, he takes your hand in his gloved one.

Softly, he begins. "Getting hurt is unfortunately part of the risk of being in love. It lets you know what you feel is or was real. It's not the end of the world, not by a long shot. Everyone who we meet and who we love crosses our paths for a reason. To teach us something, either for a short chapter or they'll be lifelong companions. Even in the afterlife, there are still people worth risking the hurt for." Smiling wobbly, Lucifer embraces you close. "Take a few deep breaths. If this is truly how you feel, talk to him about it. We may be magic down here in Hell but not all of us are mind-readers, darlin'."

For the first time in a long while, you smile too. Embracing him again with a laugh.

Standing to leave, you turn to your friend. "May I see you again?"

Lucifer let out a tiny gasp, a slight pink hue coating his cheeks. "I'd like that a lot!" He jumps up. "I can show you how to paint rubber ducks!"

When you finally return from your outing, you're in a much more visibly happy mood. With eyebrows raised, Alastor watches from the shadows as you whistle a happy little tune and make your way up the stairs and veer to the left towards your bedroom. A familiar scent clings to your own, one that makes his lips curl back in a vicious snarl. Lucifer.

"Now darling, I think it's time that we have a talk--" Alastor materializes from the shadows, fully manifesting into your bedroom. You shriek in surprise.

Immediately, you snap. "Alastor, what the fuck! OUT."

Alastor, who has been turned away from you, spins to face you aghast that you'd speak to him in such a manner as you never have before, only to quickly cover his eyes. You were standing in the privacy of your bedroom, almost entirely naked except for those flimsy bottoms you called your underwear. Alastor swallows thickly at the sight of your bare skin, even when you wrap your blanket around your body. He feels lightheaded.

"My apologies, dearest. Ta-ta!" In a plume of smoke, Alastor fades out of the room. By the time he returns to his radio tower, he's gasping with his palm covering his face which was now nearly as red as his hair. He's ashamed he hadn't shown more decorum and instead witnessed you in such a state. Even when angry with him, you had never looked more alluring.

Lucifer swung by the hotel rather unexpectedly, surprising Charlie with a new plant for her bedroom and crushing Maggie into a huge hug! The place was really coming along, he had to admit. There was a more inviting atmosphere to the hotel now since it was rebuilt. It almost felt cozy.

"Dad, what brings you by?" Charlie smiles, carefully handing the plant over to Vaggie.

Lucifer smiles. "I'm here to pick up a friend for a little coffee date and I figured I'd say hi to my favorite daughter and my favorite soon-to-be daughter-in-law!" He coos, squishing Charlie's cheeks between his gloved hands.

On queue, you're walking down the stairs into the foyer. "Lucifer!" You beam, a large smile crossing your cheeks. His tummy flutters at the sight. The outfit you had on was darling, suiting you to a T.

A crackle of static explodes into the front lobby, the Radio Demon taking form between you and the Morningstars. Alastor's eyes immediately narrowing at the unwelcomed guest, at least in his mind.

Laughing nervously, Charlie wedges herself between her father and friend. The air rippled with electricity as the two stared the other down.

"Okay, you two, calm down. Let's not start anything, ok?" She glances at Vaggie for help who simply shrugs her shoulders; setting Charlie's new plant baby aside. Approaching slowly you stand by Lucifer's side. Placing a hand on the King's shoulder, Alastor nearly explodes with radio feedback. An eerie green glow consuming his form.

Static voice dripping with malice spits out, "You're going out with him." It wasn't a question.

Casting a look over your shoulder, you nod at Alastor. "We're going out for coffee."

The Radio Demon is practically seething with venomous rage--not at you, but at the puny little shortstack of a King who thinks he can meddle with those in his life. "You don't deserve their attention, Morningstar."

Lucifer balks. "You had your chance, pal! You snooze, you lose." Alastor's expression turns to one of confusion.

"What do you mean?" The radio filter is gone from his voice.

Snarling, Lucifer glowers at him. "They were in love with you! And now I'm here to pick up the pieces-- oh, fuck, you didn't tell him did you, sweetling?" His gaze is gentle as he regards you. You're begging for the ground to swallow you up.

Fighting back tears, you fidget on the spot. You're looking everywhere but at the two men who have held your heart captive. There was the love you held for Alastor, pure and genuine. How you got together like pieces of a puzzle. And then there was your love for Lucifer, intimate and loving. He was able to teach a part of you that you'd long forgotten. He helped you smile again.

Alastor shoves Lucifer out of the way, his clawed hands cupping your face. He wipes away those tiny tears with a gentleness no one in the hotel had seen. "Je t'aime tellement, mon cour."

Lucifer, now in his Full Demon form, shoves Alastor aside and grasps your arm. You let out a cry of pain, making the two males jump. With the appearance of his full form his claws had accidentally sunk too deep into your skin. Red leaked from the four deep gashes slashed across your skin, staining the sleeve of your lovely shirt. Your pretty eyes pooling with tears.

Like a true beast, Alastor explodes into his demonic form, arms outstretched to shield you behind him. Lucifer can only fixate on the blood dripping down your arm. Vaggie and Charlie are tugging you away while Husk prepares the First-Aid kit.

Lucifer is only able to stare at the tiny pool of blood you had left behind and the pain in his eyes. And then there was Alastor, ever the gentleman, always the one fighting for your honor, looking damn well ready to devour the entire fucking Earth for you.

And Lucifer felt he deserved whatever he had coming to him. His own words echo in his head: "Getting hurt is unfortunately part of the risk of being in love. It lets you know what you feel is or was real."

|| I DON'T GIVE PERMISSION FOR MY WORKS TO BE REPOSTED, RESHARED, OR EDITED. TUMBLR IS MY ONLY ACCOUNT AND THE ONLY PLACE WHERE I POST MY WRITING. ALL CHARACTERS BELONG TO THEIR RIGHTFUL OWNERS, THE STORY BELONGS TO ME. || CHERUBFAE © 2024

#hazbin hotel imagines #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you #hazbin imagines #alastor x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #cherubfae 2024

773 notes · View notes

visenyaism · 18 days

Note

I’m SO glad you called Ned an “enabler”.

Ned gets so much praise (and hate ??) for warning Cersei before wanting to sell her out to her rapist but I disagree with that praise. No one looks at the patriarchal violence lurking beneath. You know exactly the nature of the man you’re dealing with, you saw him slapped Cersei so hard she fell to the floor and threatening to slap her again, and you think giving one flimsy warning will be enough ?? Ned is absolutely a misogynistic fool. When Robert comes back from his hunt he’ll tell Robert the truth and he thinks Cersei will have enough time to flee with her guard and children and retinue ??

“Wherever you go, Robert’s wrath will follow you”, Ned knows that sooner or later (in a few weeks, a few months), Cersei and her children will be slaughtered, he just postponed their deaths. Ned would have received a letter informing him that Robert eventually murdered Cersei and her children and think “how could this have happened ? At least, I wasn’t the one holding the knife so I don’t have their blood on my hands.”

@translannisters and @kristevanstark have much more coherent thoughts about this than me on their very fun deeply excellent asoiaf podcast but yeah in AGOT ned ends up taking this almost wife-like role (stay with me here) with robert where he’s trying to gently guide robert into doing the right thing without ever setting hard boundaries or really flat-out saying no. And ned resents cersei for not being as good at this with her abusive husband as he is. you can really see it in that conversation with cersei where he straight up says well anyone (like me) would’ve been happy to marry robert why couldn’t you have just been better because as a fellow robert baratheon dickrider he refuses to acknowledge that there IS no “doing better” at gently guiding this chaotic abusive man with absolute power into doing the right thing when he does not want to.

ned stark is a HUGE enabler of robert with a big case of “i refuse to see it” syndrome. him watching robert hit cersei and not intervene is like when stannis watched robert hit joffrey and didn’t intervene or all of the standing by as atrocities happened that people like Jaime Lannister and Arthur Dayne did. It’s absolutely an essential part of his character but i think it can be hard to see because we only see him through his wife and children and vassal house’s eyes who still very much see him as a perfect martyr figure.

#wow is this ANOTHER thing cersei pov gets right. just like her based Baelor and Jon Arryn hating #asoiaf

521 notes · View notes

juicedaloe · 9 months

Text

Mithrun and brain damage

I'm not sure if anyone is interested in this, but I wanted to make a post talking about why I think that Mithrun has brain damage from a traumatic brain injury instead of him being a representation of other neurological disorders or mental illness. I'm not that involved in the dunmesh fandom so I don't know how common this headcanon is, though I've seen a few people mention it here and there.

This is just my own opinion so if you disagree then that's fine. Some of this is just speculation and I can't say what Kui's intentions were. This post isn't meant to be that serious. I just wanted to talk about it and hopefully inform about how brain damage can affect some people in a way that I hope is interesting and relevant.

This will be kind of long because I like to talk so it will be under the cut. Apologies for the length and how much I ramble. Feel free to give input especially if I got anything wrong or if this is too confusing.

Okay let's go

Traumatic brain injury (TBI) is incredibly complex. The long-term effects of a TBI include a wide array of symptoms. Each injury is different, and some people can completely recover rather quickly while others can become permanently disabled, even for seemingly "minor" injuries. What I'll cover here isn't a definitive representation of the experiences of all those who have long-term effects from TBI, nor do I speak for everyone with brain damage.

Here are some long term symptoms relevant to this post:

Alexithymia (inability to process and name emotions)

Inability to process and name physical perceptions

Mood swings and emotional regulation difficulties

Communication difficulties

Social impairment

Apathy about caring for oneself

Lack of motivation

Alexithymia and inability to process physical perceptions

This one is rather obvious. While Mithrun is shown to feel emotions and have physical sensations (for instance, describing his location when he gets lost in the dungeon as "a cold place"), he is also apathetic to how this affects him. This means that his physical and emotional perceptions are reduced in some way. He says that becoming lord of the dungeon will leave someone "empty", showing he is aware of his dulled emotional state.

A good example of this is can be seen here in a bonus comic where he doesn't give much of a reaction to burning his mouth on hot food.

(I love these two a lot, by the way. Pattadol is really under appreciated.)

He is also not able to recognize bodily signals, such as hunger or when he is tired. Despite collapsing from exhaustion and not eating for long periods of time, he still insists he is not tired or hungry.

Mood swings

Mood swings in combination with alexithymia can be an especially disorientating experience. Those who struggle to perceive their own emotions can still feel them even if they don't know how to recognize it.

Individuals with brain injuries often experience drastic mood swings, particularly anger. To those around them, they can appear to go from 0 to 100 in an instant.

This is more speculation/headcanon on my part, as the strongest emotion Mithrun has for most of his appearances is anger. However one could interpret this as being unrelated as he is seeking revenge for a traumatic experience.

Communication difficulties and social impairment

Not only can naming personal experiences be incredibly difficult with a brain injury, but other areas of communication are often affected as well.

Mithrun is not able to set boundaries for himself even if someone is doing something he would not actually want them to do, which can leave him in a vulnerable position.

People with brain injuries can sometimes have a paradoxical experience when it comes to communicating with others. They can go from being very quiet to speaking at length about one topic, seemingly without regard for the importance of each bit of information. (I see it like Newton's first law of motion. It is hard to start speaking and it can be just as hard to stop.)

I really like this aspect of Mithrun's characterization. Usually, he is very quiet because he has no reason to speak. However, once he starts talking he is shown to be overly specific and goes on for long periods of time. Kabru has to spend multiple days figuring out his story.

In a side comic, Kabru tells Mithrun he should condense some of the personal details that Kabru finds irrelevant to the topic of the dungeon.

Mithrun shares many details about himself because his desire not to do so is gone. This mirrors the experience of many people who have brain damage to overshare and not understand how their words will come across to others. Sometimes they say or do things that are insensitive or inappropriate for the situation.

Caring for oneself and motivation

In the dungeon, Mithrun becomes reliant on others for self care. He also seems especially incapable of motivating himself to take care of his body when he is particularly focused on his goals.

In these panels, thus far he had been fairly receptive of Kabru trying to take care of him. However, he could sense that the demon was close and was too focused on that to care to eat.

Refusal of care and treatment is often an effect of traumatic brain injury. This can be for seemingly no reason, even if the person knows that this will help them. Sometimes people will lie about receiving treatment or doing things to take care of themselves, either so they can avoid it or avoid having someone take care of them.

He knows that eating regularly and not pushing himself too much will help him - he's been told multiple times on-screen - but he still has to be continuously told by others to give him that motivation to take care of himself. He's very apathetic to his physical state, even if it seems his only desire is for revenge and he should be doing anything he can to achieve that.

Other things of note

I wasn't sure where to put this, but while Mithrun's sense of direction is speculated by Kabru to be left over from his time as lord of an ever-changing, confusing dungeon, having poor sense of direction in the way he does could also be indicative of brain injury as well.

While the dungeon is confusing and illogical, he is known to have a poor sense of direction and to get frequently lost by those around him, even trying to exit an entrance he just came through. He is shown to be very intelligent, but memory is greatly impacted by brain injuries which affects a person's sense of direction and location.

Something that really stands out to me about Mithrun is how much the things that help him are particularly helpful to those with brain damage. He is physically capable of performing tasks, but he needs an outside source to remind him and get him started. He relies entirely on routine, and when that regularity is taken away he shows extreme difficulty taking care of himself.

Sometimes, the care that some people need is simply someone else to encourage them or to tell them when to do things. The care that he needs is pretty consistent with a person with a brain injury who does not need a full time caretaker and would prefer to have some independence.

Also, healing magic is specified to not work with brain injury unless the person is killed and revived. Mithrun had not been revived after his injuries, so it is entirely possible for him to have sustained a TBI. I don't think this matters that much because one is still allowed to have headcanons even if there is a magical explanation or isn't really possible in canon, but I thought it was an interesting detail.

In conclusion

Because of all this I don't believe that his lack of self care is due solely to mental illness. While mental illnesses like depression or PTSD can cause a decline in self care, the reasons why the affected individual is avoidant of these tasks differs. These disorders can also cause cognitive difficulties and emotional regulation issues, but not to the same extent or in the same way that brain damage would. I think that he does have both depression and PTSD (both are common after a TBI) but those are not his only disabilities.

And on a personal note, I just think that having a character with brain damage is really cool. Most of the time I've seen it the characters are not given very much respect and they are treated as comic relief and a joke. Regardless of whether you agree with this post or not, it is still nice to see a character with a disability like this.

Thank you if you read all of this. I hope it was easy to understand and I did not ramble too much. I don't have anything else to say but I've been wanting to write this out for a while.

Okay bye

#Dungeon Meshi #Mithrun

1K notes · View notes

ageingfangirl2 · 3 months

Text

I Take Care Of My Crew! Shanks x Reader SMUT!

You think you're alone, but your captain knows your dirty little secret and how can you refuse him, especially when all Shanks wants to do is take care of his crew. Shanks x Reader (Female) SMUT!

The Red Force had docked on another island to restock, and while the rest of the crew decided to enjoy the pleasures the taverns had to offer, you stayed on the ship to indulge in a little alone time with a purchase from a shop on the island. It was difficult being the only girl on the crew, and it wasn't helped that the guys took every opportunity to flex their bodies while treating you like a little sister since you were the youngest officer. Your last vibrator had died a couple of months ago and it wasn't until this island you could buy a new one.

You had built up respect from the crew, but if they found your toy there would be no end to the teasing. So you had to keep quiet when the ship was on the open sea, but tonight you could enjoy the sweet sensation of pleasuring yourself. After a relaxing bath, you slip into one of your nightgowns and light a candle on your dresser. This vibrator was different to the other one and the lady said this one would rock your world because one end was a bullet while the other end had a clit sucker.

You climb onto your bed lying on top of the sheets and start to play with your nipples through the gown which were hard because of the ship being naturally cold. You move your other hand to push up the hem of the gown feeling cold touch your intimate area making you shiver. You start to gently rub your folds, moving up to your clit which you circle slowly. You had enough mental material and imagination to quickly become aroused.

'Let's see what you can do,' you say teasingly, picking up the vibrator and bringing the bullet end down to your clit, 'let's start with old faithful.'

You probably should have played around with the settings beforehand because your whole body jolts at even the first setting, 'oh shit!' you moan.

You throw your head back and close your eyes, holding the toy on your clit allowing the pulsating vibes to go through your body to the very core.

'Mmm...yes...' you moan loudly, biting your lip as you scroll through the different settings.

Pleasure ripples across your lower half as your thighs buck, but you still hold firm, feeling tension build, a little ashamed at how quickly you were brought to orgasm.

'HELL YES...' you gasp, opening your eyes, taking note of your messy bedsheets from where your other hand had been clenching and your body writhing.

A sudden knock on your door scares you, and your thighs close around the toy instinctively forgetting to turn it off. No one should be back yet, it was too early.

'Hello, who is it?' you call out, quickly trying to get under the sheets to give the illusion of heading to bed.

'It's me, can I come in?' Shanks answers back, and you mentally curse yourself, Shanks didn't know how to keep a secret. Why the hell had he come back to check on you?

'Err...' you pause, your hands fidgeting under the sheets to stop the vibrator.

He opens the door and strolls in holding a box under his arm, he looks you over and frowns, 'a little early for bed isn't it?'

You hum, biting your lip, 'felt tired captain.'

He puts the box next to the candle on the dresser and smirks, 'Why are you squirming under the sheets?'

Shanks had no boundaries, as he pulled back the sheets revealing the vibrator you'd managed to turn off fall from between your thighs, 'you don't understand how hurt I am right now,' he pouts while still smirking.

'Excuse me, how are you hurt?' you question, quickly sitting up in bed after pulling your gown back down.

Shanks casually picks up the vibrator, 'I'm a good captain who takes care of his crew's needs. You had a need and didn't come to me.'

You stare at your captain dumbfounded, 'Err you'd tell the guys and they'd tease me, no offence when it comes to sex and secrets you can't keep your lips shut captain.'

Shanks nods in acknowledgement, 'Maybe, but I've known about your toys for the last year. Some nights I was curious about noises coming from your room, and despite being a good hider I found your vibrator during a search.'

You were shocked by his admission. He didn't sound disgusted, in fact, the way he was eyeing up the toy told you he might be curious. He was your main source of material, and even right now your pussy clenched at the fact he'd caught you.

You take a deep breath and decide to be bold, 'Do you want to try it on me captain?'

He raises an eyebrow and gulps as you pull your gown back up showing off your soaked pussy in all its glory, 'are you sure? I thought this was something girls did alone.'

You shake your head and lie back, your eyes not leaving his as you tempt him towards you with your hand, 'I have a need captain, aren't you going to take care of it?'

His smirk reaches his ears as his eyes darken and he licks his lips, 'I didn't know you were this horny, it's always the quiet ones.'

He picks up the box on the dresser and places it by you on the bed. You watch him take off his boots before he gets onto the bed with you. You relax, 'I can't have sex with anyone on the crew so this is the next best thing.'

Shanks turns on the sucker end of the vibrator and scrolls through the settings, 'do you have a crew member you think about the most?' he asks teasingly, stopping on a random setting.

You nod, 'I do captain.'

He brings the sucker down towards your clit nudging your legs further apart, 'do tell, I'm curious.'

You shiver in anticipation, 'he has red hair, scars across one eye, and don't get me started on his perfect chest.'

The toy touches your clit and you curse loudly as it sticks to you, 'FUCK!'

If the bullet got you, the way this attacked your clit with so much pressure was enough to blow your mind.

Shanks sits back on his heels admiration and lust on his face, 'I'm flattered you chose your captain, you're not too bad on the eyes yourself.'

You clench the sheets on either side of you as you come undone, 'Mmn...so...good...'

You notice Shanks pick up the box and hold it in front of him, 'I take care of my crew's needs. I got you something, I don't think you've owned one of these before.'

While writhing you manage to watch him take off the lid and pull out a toy that has caught your eye in the shop but had intimidated you. It was a vibrating dildo, 'that looks big,' you gasp.

Shanks runs his hand down the length of the dildo, 'I'll tell you the real thing is better, but if you've actually thought about my dick inside you then this is a good place to start, stretch you out properly.'

Your eyes widen, was he suggesting he was bigger than the dildo, that thought alone pulled another orgasm from you, 'then stretch me out, captain.'

You spread your legs as far as they'll go, your juices slick enough to coat the dildo without much prep. Shanks grunts as he runs the tip of the dildo up and down your folds, 'turn off the vibrator,' he orders, 'the only noise I want to hear is you imagining getting off on my dick fucking you.'

With shaky hands you turn off the vibrator and remove it from your now sensitive clit, 'I'm ready captain.'

Shanks pushes the tip against your entrance that throbs around it before engulfing it, 'good girl,' he praises.

He slides the whole length inside you, your body betraying you as it eagerly stretches around it without much pain or protest.

'Are you comfortable?' he asks.

You nod, 'Yes captain.'

Your body should have been prepared after the vibrator power but the second Shanks turns on the dildo you're overcome with a sensation you haven't experienced before, with a dildo penetrating you instead of using your fingers.

'So good...SHIT!' you curse, back arching.

Shanks chuckles darkly, 'Close your eyes and think of me.'

You comply closing your eyes, and moan sharply as he pushes it in and out of you at varying speeds. It had been a good month since you had sex so you were a little tight, but your walls hugged the dildo leaving you at the mercy of your captain who was grunting and praising you. He was clearly getting off himself at the scene the two of you found yourselves in.

You let your imagination go wild as pleasure consumes every inch of your body, 'going to cum...' you mumble, words coming out of your lips between gasps and moans.

'Cum for me, cum for your captain,' Shanks commands, his voice firm like he was casually shouting orders at the crew.

You buck your hips and release around the dildo, breathing heavily as Shanks allows you to ride your high. You open your eyes and sigh contently, 'Thank you, captain.'

Shanks removes the dildo and pulls down your gown, 'Get yourself cleaned up and straight to bed young lady.'

You sit up and motion towards his obvious bulge, 'What about your needs captain?'

Shanks grins, 'I have plenty of material, don't you worry your pretty head. But the dildo comes with me.'

You pout, 'why? I thought you got it for me.'

Shanks laughs as he gets up from the bed and picks up the dildo, 'If you want to use it you will do so in my presence, can't have you having too much fun on your own.'

Before you can argue, he bends down and kisses you softly on the forehead, this man was very confusing and always had ulterior motives. But he had rocked your world, so you'd let him off the hook for now, but you would get your hands on that dildo again.

466 notes · View notes