the fact that Glinda couldn't sleep well the night Elphaba died, even though she didn't know she was dead, that she light up a candle for reasons she couldn't articulate.
they were soulmates. you cannot convince me otherwise
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i have a feeling elphaba already knew in her heart she was going to leave shiz and never come back, and that’s why she brought glinda along, because she wanted to at least properly say goodbye to her.
even if everything went well with the wizard, she still would’ve left. she couldn’t deal with being under madame morrible’s thumb, couldn’t deal with the murder of dr. dillamond. she couldn’t deal with that school.
so she brought glinda along, for company, and maybe because she thought having a nice gillikinese girl along with her would help with her plea to the wizard. better presentation, a rhetoric sort of thing. but most importantly because she had a plan, a plan to say goodbye.
or, she didn’t know what she knew, she knew half of it, had half a plan. she at least knew she wasn’t ever going back to shiz. maybe a part of her hoped glinda would stay with her, would leave shiz too, if all went well with the wizard, if she didn’t have a reason to go “underground.” maybe she would’ve let glinda go underground with her, if things weren’t so dire. she'd stay up all night, nervous about their meeting with his ozness, but nervous about other things, too. how to tell her? how to tell her i’m leaving, and i want her to come with me? how to tell her i’m leaving, and i DON’T want her to come with me? not necessarily in a lovey, romantic way, but in an “acknowledging she (elphaba) can’t be alone” kind of way. she can’t be alone, not now, when she’s gotten so used to how the other half lives, but she also can’t bear to put glinda in danger. so she ponders, wondering what will happen, wondering if she’s made the right choice to have even asked glinda to come with her, if that was right of her, morally, and feeling the girl nuzzle in closer suddenly and deciding yes, she needs this.
then it goes wrong. the wizard won’t listen. the wizard is toying with her. her plan changes and she knows glinda suddenly can’t come with her, it’d be too dangerous, she feels herself becoming too angry. it’d be asking too much, and she realizes almost with a laugh that she doesn’t know why she’d even ever thought that such a thing was possible. and it almost trips her up when glinda asks, rather frantically, where elphaba is going. she thinks for a split moment that maybe it can happen, maybe she can come, but squanders it. she kisses glinda when she leaves because it’s the best thing she can do. she kisses her twice because she needs it for herself.
she’s been alone for so long, and being alone for longer will have to do. because it’s the right thing to do, and elphaba always tries to do the “right” thing.
and glinda’s crying, because she’s now lost two very important people in her life. because her elphie doesn’t care about her.
and elphaba isn’t crying. because if she did, she wouldn’t be able to stop.
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