#witcher tag
danceinshadowundermoonlight · 23 hours ago
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Stinky adorable man.
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roughentumble · 2 days ago
But more importantly I'm thinking about Ciri as Supergirl! Instead of being his cousin she's his god daughter (insert some hand wavey explanation for their age difference, like idk maybe some kinda Kryptonian stasis and she arrived later bc of a miscalculation or something idk)
ooo, i thought that was supergirl's backstory, that she was sent out in stasis and so she left before clark but ended up there after he was already an adult, making her his older-younger cousin, and him her younger-older cousin?? but i dont really follow supergirl comics so that idea is definitely cobbled together from multiple sources and assumptions lol.
i googled her really quickly and apparently there was some kind of power struggle in her family?? which i think works well for ciri, this little princess at the center of a huge power struggle. she gets to earth as if a day has passed, her planet and people and FAMILY all dead, the wounds still fresh, and then as if by fate she finds another kryptonian-- the only other kryptonian-- who takes her in and raises her. and there's a lot of him teaching her, but he also has a lot of questions for her about life on their home planet(something he'll never get to know on his own, landing here as a babe)
idk. idk! incheresting. my thoughts are very scattered, perhaps they'll coalesce more once i eat dinner lol
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herbatahleb · 4 months ago
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just relax
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takingoffmyshoes · a year ago
modern-with-magic au where geralt is like a one-person paranormal home inspector team and yeah sometimes it's a wraith or whatever but do you know how many times he's had to explain, like, basic facts about wildlife. and plumbing. he's like "for sure you're not haunted" and people are like "haha no no no I'm definitely haunted there's no other explanation" and he just stares at them like. "buddy. listen. ghosts are real. wraiths are real. necrophages are real. shit, I had to clear out a lower vampire nest in someone's attic two weeks ago. I've been doing this job for 400 years and I am telling you, with absolute certainty, that your problem is squirrels."
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wawa-evg · 3 months ago
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I think I’m in love with Jaskier 👌✨
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mono-no-ke · 7 months ago
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lilac and gooseberries 💜
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popcorn1989 · 7 months ago
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Photoshooting - Eamon Farren
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triibufest · a month ago
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incorrectthewitcher · 7 months ago
Jaskier: I found that I have been happier ever since I changed from drinking coffee in the morning to orange juice
Jaskier: Yennefer says it's the vitamin-C, I personally think it's the vodka
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augusta-imperatrix · 5 months ago
Circus Horse
Geralt's voice echoed through the empty hallways of Kaer Morhen like thunder.
Jaskier, who was just putting new strings into his lute looked up from his task when Geralt stormed into the hall.
The Witcher had a furious grimace on his face, almost fuming with anger as he pointed at Jaskier.
Jaskier lifted one eyebrow:
"We're back to job titles, are we, witcher?"
Geralt pressed his lips together, obviously trying (and failing) to keep calm.
"Where's Ciri?"
"Ciri? Not 'the princess'? Not 'my unbearable child surprise'? Not 'my nerve-wracking daughter'?"
Jaskier asked with a smug grin on his face.
He loved it when Geralt was angry, as long as he wasn't the cause or the target of his anger.
Which he of course was most of the time. Like today, but today Geralt didn't know who's idea all of this had been.
"She's all of that, so YES, her. Have you seen her?"
That was a lie. Of course Jaskier had seen her. He, in fact, had told her where to hide. Because he knew as long as he was around distracting the witcher, Geralt's nose wouldn't be able to detect his daughter.
Ciri was sitting behind one of the dusty curtains at the wall behind Jaskier, choking her giggling with her fists pressed to her lips.
The curtains where thick and heavy. They covered the windows to keep the wind blowing through the chinks, so they swallowed the surpressed laughter behind them perfectly.
"Why are you searching for her anyway?"
Jaskier asked, seemingly being the most innocent person to ever have walked this continent.
Cirilla slumped her body across the table Jaskier was sitting at. He had taken a seat next to the windows to have enough light while patching up a hole in his doublet.
"I'm boooooored."
Jaskier smiled. He understood. Being a teenager was annoying as it was, but being surrounded only by considerably older people, rough witchers, a sorceress, and a bard, was an additional burden.
Jaskier lowered his hands.
"And what am I supposed to do?"
"I don't know."
Ciri had buried her head in her folded arms and huffed in annoyance.
"But if I tell Geralt or Yen that I'm bored they ALWAYS come up with work I can do. But I don't want to do anything."
Her voice sounded dull against her arms and the wooden table.
"Hmh..." Jaskier thought about it for a moment, his doublet by now completely abandoned.
"We could practice braiding hair again? I still keep messing up the strands. And when Geralt and I leave in the spring and you stay with Yen, I want to be able to reliably braid your father's hair."
Ciri lifted her head:
"Yeah, but who to practice on? Yen and Geralt? They'll just tell us to do something productive. Lambert..."
Without lifting his head, the witcher who sat a few tables over and was busy derusting his swords said:
"Don't even think about it."
Jaskier grinned and leaned closer to Ciri, whispering:
"Lambert, Lambert, what a jolly nice chap."
"I heard that."
Jaskier stifled a laugh. He shot Ciri a glance that very clearly said: those witchers and their damn heightened senses.
Ciri grinned back and rolled her eyes in agreement.
"So, who to ask?" Ciri sat up straight, propped up her arm and leaned her head into her open palm.
Jaskier thought about it for a moment:
"How about Roach? You know, the new Roach..."
A short moment of pain flickered over Ciri's features, but I vanished as quickly as it had appeared.
"She has a pretty long mane and tail. We could practice on her?"
Ciri's face light up:
"Oh, yes! Yen brought me some velvet ribbons, last time when she was buying potion ingredients. We could braid some of them into Roach's hair?"
Jaskier nodded:
"Good idea. You get the ribbons, I finish my sewing and we meet at the stable."
Ciri smiled widely, jumped onto her feet and ran out of the hall.
"Why are you searching for her anyway?"
"Because she defaced my poor horse."
Geralt's voice sounded slightly more calm by now.
"Oh, come on, Geralt. Those ribbons don't deface Roach. You can still ride her!"
"Yeah, but how am I supposed to take myself seriously when Roach looks like a second-rate circus horse and..."
The witcher stopped in his tracks and Jaskier immediately knew why.
"Oh shit." He mumbled under his breath, grinning apologetically up at Geralt.
"So it was your idea?"
Jaskier blushed.
"I...well...yes it was. She was bored and I..."
"So my lover and my daughter teamed up against me and my poor horse? Unbelievable."
Geralt's anger seemed to have evaporated and the bard shot him another glance.
The witcher walked around the table, and when he had almost reached Jaskier, the bard suddenly knew what would happen to him.
"Oh no, Geralt, please, have mercy, we...AHH!"
Strong fingers drilled into both sides of Jaskier's ribcage and the bard howled with laughter.
"Ciri, HELP! Humble bard in danger! Save meeeee!"
With a holler, Ciri jumped out of her hideout and onto Geralt's broad back. She tried to get his hands off of Jaskier, an action that left the witcher completely unfazed.
"Mercy, have mercy!" Jaskier gasped, tears streaming down his cheeks.
"Please, good sir, have mercy!"
Finally, Geralt quit torturing the bard, who sunk back down on the bench, while the witcher plucked his daughter off his back and planted her down next to Jaskier.
"So...What do you two have to say for yourself?"
Jaskier knew Geralt tried to be strict, but the soft expression in his golden eyes told the bard that he and the princess had already won and were off the hook.
He still made an appropriately contrite face.
"Sorry, Geralt."
Ciri nodded:
"Yes. Sorry, father."
The corner of Geralt's mouth twitched. Ciri knew very well that he couldn't resist her when she called him father.
"For fucks sake. All right. Ciri, please go and free poor Roach from your... beautification."
The princess nodded and left the hall as fast as she could.
"And you."
The witcher grinned down at the bard, who stood up and wrapped his arms around the older man's torso, leaning his head against his chest.
"You stop and sabotage my already poor attempts at education."
Jaskier grinned and lifted his head, looking at Geralt.
"If you're honest with yourself, you know that you yourself are the one who's sabotaging her education."
Geralt laughed and pressed a small kiss to the bard's nose.
"Maybe you're right."
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adrianspoison · 8 months ago
joey batey rlly didn’t have to growl out the word ‘disappointing’ when singing burn, butcher, burn but i thank god every single day that he did
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roughentumble · 7 months ago
wait wait wait WAIT one day geralt mentions his husband in a sort of roundabout way, and jaskier is like YOUR HUSBAND???? and geralt’s like *amused* yes? my husband? and jaskier goes off to lick his wounds about it, because he had no idea, and he’s a little insulted that he didnt get an invite to the wedding, but mostly he’s just-- yearning. he thought he might have a chance with geralt, SOMEday, but not if the man’s already married!
the mystery man keeps coming up, albeit rarely, little comments like “i think my husband would like these,” while pointing out some jewelry at a vendor’s stall, or once jaskier caught him with a quill and ink and geralt said he was writing to his husband, “parting is hard but letters help to ease the ache, a bit.” at least jaskier gets his own letter, too, that winter. a little consolation prize.
or so he thinks, until it’s finally revealed that geralt has been talking about jaskier this whole time
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herbatahleb · 4 months ago
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thinking that Geralt's eyes are like a cat's and-
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halfpricedprincess · 7 days ago
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masternest · 7 months ago
Just two orphan dads with their orphan kids
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Credit: Raiddo @ DeviantArt
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popcorn1989 · 6 months ago
When you suddenly stand in front of the naked Witcher boys.
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- Just look at you. And makes no attempt to turn around or cover himself.
- thinks it's funny that you can't tear yourself away from his sight.
- was telling a joke that isn't funny. And leads to him wrapping you around his finger and Its ending up in bed. Fuck.
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- Gets mad as you stand there and look at him, his body, his property.
- Gets louder when he asks you to at least turn around, but doesn't bother to cover himself. You Mad too.
- His eyes are piercing you. He won the look duel and you decide to turn around.
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- sees you and screams like a woman. Still trying to look cool.
- grabs things he holds in front of his privates. He looks around with his eyes confused.
- gives you a lecture on how to behave when entering a room... next time just knock.
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- he looks at you and grins, nods at you and confronts you in a combative manner.. no idea why.
- rubs his chest and raises an eyebrow questioningly.
- draws his sword when you decided to help him dress.. get out of here quickly.
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- angrily strides towards you and grabs your shoulder. He looks you so deep in the eyes that you get goosebumps.
- he is quiet and asks you to leave the room. Otherwise he would burn your ass. Shit
- lets you go and presents you his shapely buttocks. You don't see his grin anymore. You don't want a burned butt.
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- starts laughing and pats his thigh. Ask you to throw his pants over him. Sure
- jokes about how he can't zip his pants and you could help him.. should you really?
- asks you if you enjoyed the view. And laughs wildly again. You try to laugh with him.
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veebeeart · 11 months ago
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