Marisa isn't happy.
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Quit throwing parties on the island! They’re loud and obnoxious! We already know that Caesar is dead, quiet the fuck down about it. Also this is far too much blood for one man, who else did y’all kill?
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Are you guys aware of Deep Sea Dishes? Located in Portland, OR. It's a seafood restaurant, but the dishes are extranormal. They have genuine kraken salt. That's not been on any known market since the 80's at least. They also seem to have minimal actual, well, "masking." The food looks normal, but as someone who's had their fair share of extranormal food, it's not. Tastes that aren't quite right. The employees almost seem artificial too. Eyes black as ink, hands don't move right. Normal people walked in and got creeped out. Really poor veil upholding here. I'm retired, but this seems worth a report at least.
Sincerely,
A Former Abnaval Officer
So, the Kraken salt is not suspicious in itself - recent negotiations with Atlantis have okayed Kraken and Kraken products for import in select markets.
I'll take your suspicion about the place itself, though. I see they're on our list, no previous strikes. New management, maybe. The lack of masking is enough that we'd get Abnormal Business Bureau over there.
The eyes and hands...I can't figure out the angle. This seems like something I've seen before...
God, what was it. 2006? We had a fast food place come up on the radar that registered with us. It was owned by a wizard, or so we thought, nothing super weird about it. When I ate there, I sort of....hm. How to phrase this...
The place was built on a leyline and was using that to create magical dynamo that harvested quantum potentiality. Quantum potentiality is when a choice could split into an alternate universe, and for a zeptosecond that energy and potentiality is there. The restaurant owner was using the possibility energy to "steal" items and ideas from alternate universes that did not exist. Being a little in tune with this stuff I felt odd in a way I had the guys in Applied Thaumaturgy examine, and it turns out the wizard stole some very personal things from me. Well, not theft, they weren't real before he apparated them, of course. It's complicated, we still got him for theft ex nihilo.
Not that I think that's what's happening here, of course, but we did find out that the workers were all constructs, like we might be seeing here. We'll send someone out.
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Real observations since I started wearing a wizard hat daily:
- Brim is so wide that I stay BONE DRY taking walks in the rain
- Brim can be positioned to block the sun from ever getting in my eyes AND keeping it off the back of my neck
- The pointed top part creates an air pocket, keeping my head from getting hot or squishing my hair as it might in a ball cap
- Hat can easily be pulled down over the tips of my ears without looking dumb, protecting them from wind chill
- Strangers say they like my hat, giving me the chance to tell them that I am a wizard
- When you’re wearing a wizard hat, ALL OTHER FASHION CHOICES become secondary, allowing you to branch out with style
Embrace ego death. Stay protected from all elements. Wear a wizard hat.
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Scissor Wizard and Paper Wizard
It’s probably fine to leave them alone together.
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Comic of this here.
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Cone minions
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I'm looking through powerpoint templates for a class presentation and was absolutely blown away by this one. I don't care what the topic is supposed to be, all of my future powerpoints have to have the Wizard
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Wizard RPG that takes the Vancian "spells are demons made of math that live in your brain" thing to its logical yet absurd conclusion and casts the player character's prepared spells as a Disco Elysium style internal peanut gallery that influences dialogue trees and makes fun of your decisions. I want to get relationship advice from magic missile.
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How do I start my journey using arcane magic safely and with a licensed mentor?
You’re going to want to contact a North American branch of the European Thaumaturgical Centre for Research and Analysis, known as ETCetRA. They’re the foremost authority on magic in the western world, and they have plenty of branches in the States.
In the US, ETCetRA-authorized institutions are pretty varied. ETCetRA sort of authorizes their basic curriculum and methods but how that actually pans out is very difficult depending on the degree, institution, lots of factors. Sometimes it’s like a university, sometimes it’s night classes, sometimes it’s a few people meeting in a library public room.
Always make sure you see the ETCetRA seal of approval. There’s plenty of fly by night diploma mills in the US that will just take your money or teach you magic irresponsibly. We walk about one in this article.
One more thing - I’m not going to say that you should learn magic yourself, but it’s my understanding that often the mentor-student relationship is sort of formality and more of a guide. Magic is incredibly personal to the point where different magic users often find it hard to cooperate, since the way they understand their relationship to the arcane is so different.
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*reblog for a more universal wizard tower*
Edit: it's supposed to say purposeless area,
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Hogwarts houses are out. Unseen University disciplines are in. Choose your side
Indefinite studies
Recent Runes
Inadvisably Applied Magic
Cruel and Unusual Geography
Post Morthem Communications
Applied Astrology
Approximate Accuracy
Applied Anthropics
Extreme Horticulture
Liberal studies
Illiberal Studies
Morbid Bibliomamcy
Recondite Architecture and Origami Map Folding
Recondite Phenomena
Slood Dynamics
Esoteric Studies
Wooly Thinking
Op you forgot-
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