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#woah shock horror monarchy bad
mummer · 3 years
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honestly f&b and especially the dance of the dragons are like..... collections of my all least favorite things about asoiaf, without any of the stuff that makes asoiaf good to me.... there’s no grand mythic sweep, no focus on story and song and prophecy and rhyming history, no theme of nature returning vengefully and no conflict between natural/heroic/chivalric paradigms, no MAGIC, no The Only True Knights Are Not Knights At All with a little hint of gendering, no human heart in conflict with itself, like Oh it’s literally all war and politics????? who wants that barf
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imaginegladions · 7 years
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Since you just did a Frozen AU, how about a Tangled AU? Obviously, Lusamine would be Gothel, and Lillie would be Rapunzel, but where would that leave Gladion?
So, I was looking around the net for an ENG SUB watch free for the new Free! Timeless Medley ~Bonds~ movie. I was waiting since last last month for it but there’s still no Eng Sub, which I get. I waited 2 months until the Aikatsu Stars movie got an Eng Sub. But still, I kept looking. And found. A downloadable version with Indo Sub. :|
Anyway, this ask cheered me up a bit. My dad told me that if I was any Disney Princess, I’d be Rapunzel. IDK what he means we are not alike. He loves this movie though.
TANGLED AU WITH A TWIST HEADCANONS:
As per canon, Lillie is part of the royal family of Aether and so is Gladion. Queen Lusamine oversees most of the politics though while Mohn tends to plants and makes cheap medicine and watches over the needy making sure there’s not too much tax and stuff. 
Bless him.
Let’s say Lusamine was with child when Mohn discovered the magic glowing flower.
It was actually a part of his medicinal garden, it just popped up there one day. 
He wanted to study it so of course he pulls it out of the ground to harvest it.
But, unlike pretty movie flower this flower has poisonous!!! thorns!!!
Of course, this kills Mohn.
I’m so sorry Mohn. But you didn’t die in the Frozen AU.
And Lusamine becomes absolutely batshit and tries almost kills Lillie and herself from the pain because she doesn’t want to live anymore.
But lil Gladion, being the sweetheart he is, manages to separate the flower from the nasty thorny stem and create a medicine that would help Lusamine give birth easier.
He also doses her with anaesthetic on the sly so the delivery is silent.
And fortunately, Lusamine sleeps long enough to get Lillie delivered safely by the chambermaids.
Lusamine however does not take kindly to being drugged by her son so she packs to leave under cover of night completely determined to live out her days alone in a boat house she recovered some years ago.
She however is still pretty hurt from labor and stumbles as she’s pacing and her leg starts bleeding.
Tiny baby Lillie hears her mummy in distress and grabs one of Lusamine’s long hair strands and hums/babbles until the wound is healed.
Big Mistake because now mumsie has pLANS FOR YOU.
Lillie - as per canon - ends up living with nutso mummy Lusamine in a boat house off the shore of the Kingdom of Alola in an underwater cave.
Too bad magical healing powers can’t heal trauma.
Anyway, this is where reader comes in.
Reader is a…
COMMONER ROUTE:
… commoner who deep sea dives to make a living.
You pretty much go down there to catch fish or collect valuable rocks.
Mostly though, you sell Pyukkumuku.
(Sea Cucumbers, yes kids do that where I’m from, collect and sell Sea Cucumbers to survive.)
You also explore caves hoping to find treasure to sell so you can go to the Capitol where you hear Prince Gladion is kind enough to take in street people and give them nicer jobs!
What you don’t expect however is to find a secret boat house in an underwater cave.
Thankfully, you watch a little confused as Lusamine leaves the cave to get food, and are not confronted with any angry ex-Queens.
But, as you’re searching for treasure you hear Lillie singing about wanting to get tf out of this boathouse and live her life.
“Your voice is pretty!”
“Than-OH MY GOD! A MONSTER!”
Aw, Lils don’t hurt my feelings.
Oops. You forgot that deep sea diving usually made it so that you’re covered in all sorts of gunk.
Lillie tells you all about her story and you’re kinda liiiiike…
“Sorry, Lils. But, I think your mother might have turned psycho on you no offence.”
“Huh?”
“Um, she needs medical care. Don’t worry, Prince Gladion has medical services open to all at the palace!”
And that’s how you and Lillie traverse Alola doing odds and end jobs until you reach the castle all the while leading Lusamine who is chasing you towards free medical treatment.
In that time, Lillie reads lots of books and you do a lot of fighting.
By the time you get to the castle, you’re an excellent street fighter and Lillie is intelligent AF enough to figure out a way to cut her hair and make medicine from its magical properties.
And when Gladion sees his sister running into the castle with Lusamine on her heels!!!
“It’s good to have you back.”
“Who? ME? Do we know each other?”
“I’m your brother… you’re… the Princess of Alola?”
“Who? ME???”
Gladion is v thankful that you brought his family home safely ah he lost so many guards trying to recover them. D:
And in thanks he offers you a job as Lillie’s personal guard.
You kick all the other guards’ butts though, so eventually you become the Captain of the Royal Guard with your right hand guy, Hau.
One evening, there is a Ball (one of many) to choose who Gladion will be marrying.
Lillie feels super bad for her brother and hates that he has to do it for politics.
But then, he sees you and Gladion chatting amicably and DING DING DING IDEA!
She decides to get you guys to fall in love before the last ball to decide Gladion’s future wife.
Lillie has her work cut out for her though since you both have crushes the size of Jupiter on each other.
On the last day of the ball, Gladion manages to insult some monarch by not asking her daughter to dance with him and said monarch pays for someone to kill Gladion.
Woah that became v Game of Thrones, lol
You saw the assassin, though.
AND YOU DIVE IN THE PATH OF THE POISONOUS KNIFE.
GLADION IS FURIOUS, RIP THAT ASSASSIN.
They think you’re a goner, it even feels like your heart stopped but then you end up miraculously alright!
“That poison… it’s-”
“Pyukkumuku poison!!! I’m immune to that!”
You become Gladion’s First Knight and Consort to the Throne.
ROYALTY ROUTE:
… royal ambassador to Alola from Kanto.
Technically, you’re one of the kids of the King and Queen.
You have so many siblings though so it’s not like you’re in charge of much. 
Just, relations with other countries.
You find interacting with other regions so fun though! And you’re often lost by the crew off adventuring somewhere in the region.
This is how you fall off of your ship and end up swimming into the secret cave where the boat house is located.
And boyyyy is Lusamine pissed to find you washed up here.
She basically yells at you loud enough to bring Lillie out of hiding.
Your gasp is loud af because you know her.
“Lillie! Oh my gosh! You’re okay! Gladion was so worried!”
“… uh- what?”
Lusamine is positively scandalised but she knows exactly who you are now and she’s not letting you take her or Lillie back to that house of horror!
“I’m afraid you’re not well right now, your Highness.”
You snap your fingers and Lusamine is taken away by your trusty guard Hau who arrived just in time to take the loony back to Gladion.
Before you arrive at the castle, you tell Lillie all about what really happened and you teach her about monarchy and being a royal.
She’s just so excited to try new things it’s rather invigorating!
So you both try commoner things together too.
You dress her up in some Fine Clothes before she formally meets her brother though.
At first, she’s very shy and intimidated but when Gladion spots you and smiles she knows he’s a good guy.
She also knows he’s suPER INTO YOU AHAHAHAHA.
She asks Gladion about it one night, demanding that he tell his lil sis all she missed out on.
Turns out, Gladion and you have met a lot of times, you being the ambassador of Kanto. You also played together with him as kids.
If he could choose, he’d want to marry you.
Lillie is super touched by this. ;-;
She goes to ask you about you and Gladion and surprise surprise! You’ve always liked him too! But you thought it wasn’t a wise match since you weren’t inheriting the throne in your own country.
You and Gladion spend lots of time together, in politics lessons and meetings and balls.
Lillie tries so hard to get you two to interact and it usually pays off.
But one day, your parents send you a letter telling you to come back imMEDIATELY.
Gladion and Lillie notice you’re so down nowadays and ask you what’s wrong.
“I’m… getting married.”
*insert that Robin gif from Betrothed here*
Gladion is too shocked to stop you from leaving.
All he and Lillie can do is watch you get back on your ship back to Kanto.
“That’s it? You’re giving up?”
“…. hell no.”
Gladion speeds onto his own royal ship to crash your royal wedding to some kid from Sinnoh!
Kid from Sinnoh is not happy about some guy crashing his wedding though so he and Gladion get into a sword fight where Gladion is mortally wounded.
You call off the wedding and rush to Gladion’s side with Lillie.
Lillie wraps her magic hair around the wound and you both sing desperately, watching him be mended back together.
You grab that boy and kiss him in relief.
And then he takes you back to Alola to get married!!!
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