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annabelinlove · 2 months

Text

No Games

Pairing: Wolfstar x reader (Sirius Black x Reader, Remus Lupin x Reader)

Summary: You were injured by some Slytherins and the boys worry for you.

Word Count: 5.9k

Warnings: angst, description of violence, language, Snape is a dick, English isn’t my first language, Peter doesn’t exist in this, lmk if I missed any

Being a muggle born never really bothered you. You loved your parents, and you were glad for the childhood you had. They were really surprised when you had gotten your letter but were supportive nevertheless. They didn’t understand your new world and even though they were happy for you, they never cared to learn more about it. Part of you was bothered about it, because living in two different worlds, yet still trying to communicate, was hard. You drifted apart and whenever you visited during the breaks, they never wanted to hear about your school year or the magical world. It was usually awkward and uncomfortable, but you still loved them dearly and knew they loved you. You weren’t ashamed of your parents and defended them any chance you got.

Your first year was pretty hard. Not only were you getting used to this whole new world you were suddenly thrown into, but you’ve also learned the hard way, that being a muggle born was viewed as a bad thing. Being called worthless, stain on the wizarding world and mudblood were suddenly a daily occurrence. Thankfully, being sorted into Gryffindor led you to meet some amazing people and become best friends with Lily Evans. You tried to get through it together and it was suddenly much easier to have someone who understood you. You’ve befriended the Marauders as well and since the start of the second year, you were inseparable. Lily had some apprehension at the beginning, since James Potter was an ‘arrogant toerag’ in her words, but you’ve helped her realize, that there was much more then mischief in the boys. It didn’t take long for you to develop feelings for two of the troublemakers. There was just something about Sirius Black and Remus Lupin that made you fall, and you fell hard. You still remembered the conversation with Lily, where you revealed your feeling by accident. It was soon after Sirius and Remus started dating.

“I don’t get how the two of them could be together! Don’t get me wrong, I’m really happy for them and I hope they’ll be happy but they’re just... they’re so different!” Lily told you drunkenly at one of the famous Gryffindor parties, looking at the couple snogging in the middle of the made-up dance floor.

“And that’s the beauty of it, you know? When Sirius is hotheaded, Remus is there to calm him down and where Remus is reserved, Sirius helps him get out of his shelf. They’re two sides of the same coin,” you defended them fiercely. Seeing them like that made you so happy, but the darker side of you was jealous, wishing you could be part of it.

“I kinda wish a coin had three sides, you know? Can you imagine how amazing that would be?” You said without thinking, gaze fixed on the two boys. Lily shot you a confused look.

“A coin with three sides? How would that even look? And what kind of shape would it have to have? Why would you want a three-sided coin?” Her confusion was not only in her eyes, but you could also detect it in her voice as well. You just rolled your eyes at her oblivion.

“I don’t want a three-sided coin Lily, I wanna be part of their relationship. How you’re on top of every class, I have no idea.”

The memory always made you smile. And your wish came true. Not long after your conversation with Lily, even though it felt like years for you, you became a part of the relationship. It was quite complicated at the beginning, you were no stranger to dating, but dating not only two boys but two Golden boys of Hogwarts was no easy task. But you’ve happily settled and after some long conversations, when you all tried to figure out, you were as happy as you could ever be.

Your sixth year was however when things turned complicated once again. The war raging outside the walls of the castle was taking a tool on you. You were constantly worried about the safety of your family as well as your own. It was no secret that you had muggle parents, which made you a target at the school as well. Every time you saw some Slytherins, mostly Snape with Malfoy and Mulciber, you were called names and even hexed multiple times. But it wasn’t only you, every muggle born was treated like that, which didn’t make it better, yet it seemed like you were the biggest target, wether it was because of your connection and close friendship with the Marauders, the constant pranks you pulled on them or the fact, that you always fought back and never let them get away with it. You had many serious talks with Lily about this topic. She tried to tell you to take it easy and ignore them like she did, and they’d get bored of it soon. You never had the heart to tell her, that the reason the boys didn’t target her as much was because Severus still had feelings for her, even after their falling-out, and threatened other Slytherins to take it easy on her.

“Why did you do that?” Lily asked you as you laid on your bed with a pack of ice on your face that still stung from the hex they threw at you.

“You mean why did I turned them into snakes? Because that’s what they fucking are Lily. I can’t juste let them call me names and walk away. Plus, they started it,” you said tiredly, the headache making you nauseous.

“But you could! If you had just ignored them, you wouldn’t have been hurt and in detention” she tried once again “that’s what I do, just walk away. So what if the call us mudbloods, its not like its harmful anymore.”

“But its not about the name calling. They’re fucking death eaters and acting like they’re better than us, but they’re not! It’s about the principle. You can’t do something bad and not get punished for it.” The conversation was almost identical to the one you’ve had many times in the past.

“Well, at least you’ve answered your question why you have to go to detention for the following week,” Lily sighed and went to change you ice pack.

The boys tried their best to protect you, they always made sure that at least one of them was with you. Wether it was in library with Remus, quidditch with James, the kitchen with Sirius or at least one of them walking you to every class and the Great Hall. They never talked to you about it, but you knew what they were doing, and the thoughtfulness warmed your heart. But they couldn’t be with you every second of the day no matter how much you wanted them to or how much they tried. That’s how you found yourself walking to your common room late at night after another detention with McGonagall.

“I’m sorry, you did what?!” Remus shrieked, staring at you in disbelief.

“I set Snivellus on fire. I mean, just his robes,” you mumbled sheepishly. Your boyfriends stared at you with mixed amazement and incredulity. James bursted into laughter.

“How come we never thought of that?” He said between laughter.

“Pff, don’t encourage her Prongs or she’ll think it was a good idea and will do something analogously stupid.” Your scarred boyfriend scoffed, but the corner of his mouth twitching.

“And what was I supposed to do? Let him torture the poor second year and just walk away?” You tried to defend your actions, slowly getting worked up.

“That’s not what he meant, pet. We just want you to be careful. Moony means well, he’s scared, just like the rest of us. They’re getting bolder and bolder. We’re proud of you for defending the kid, aren’t we, Moons?” Sirius finally joined the conversation, trying to calm you all down. He pulled you into his arms, kissing your head. Remus sighed and took your face into his hands, looking deeply into your eyes.

“Of course I’m proud, you're our brave girl, darling. Just don’t wanna see you hurt.” And with those words he kissed you deeply.

Walking down the dark and empty corridor, you tried not to think about the sickening smell you’ve been inhaling for the least couple of hours. Professor McGonagall made you wash one of the dirty bathrooms without magic as your punishment. You were disgusted with the Hogwarts students and the mess they could make. So lost in your own head, you didn’t even hear the steps of people behind you. Not until it was too late anyway.

“Well, well, well, who do we have here?” Said the voice behind you that belonged to no other then Severus Snape. Before you could even pull out your wand, it flew out of your hands with a simple Expelliarmus from Mulciber, whom you just noticed standing behind Snape.

“I’m not in a mood for your games Snivellus,” you snapped at him, already tired from the day you had.

“Oh, trust me, this is no game,” he threatened, smiling at you maliciously. You wanted to punch him so hard.

“What are you even doing here, aren’t you supposed to be at the infirmary? Those burns looked pretty nasty earlier.” His smile disappeared and something much more dangerous appeaed on his face.

“You’re gonna pay for that, you stupid bitch,” he sneered at you. Your fight or flight instincts kicked in and you moved to him with the intention to rip his head off his body. But before you could take more than few steps, he hit you with a Petrificus Totalus spell. You tried to mask your panic when you realized you could possibly be in an immense danger without your wand and the ability to move with two deatheaters, who loathed you. The grin Snape and Mulciber gave you was a sign of how much of a shit job you did to hide your emotions.

“Not so brave now, are you, mudblood?” Mulciber gave you a sickening smirk. You could see nothing but madness in his eyes. They started to circle around you, eyeing you like predators wanting to hurt their prey. You watched them carefully, waiting for their next move.

“Not in a mood for games, did you say? What a shame because I’m ready to play,” said Mulciber before casting a Flipendo and suddenly, you were upside down, your head hitting the floor. You wanted to do something, protect yourself, scream for help, but you were powerless, unable to do any of the things you wanted to.

“I feel like it’d be much more fun if she didn’t see us, don’t you agree?” He asked Severus who chuckled and nodded.

“For once, I must agree with you. Obscurs!” And all of a sudden you were blindfold, your panic rising. You had no idea what they had planned for you, but were sure it was nothing pleasant. Everything went pretty hazy after they hit you with the Confundus charm. The two deatheaters were taking turns hexing you. They made you slowly bleed and ache, but they haven’t done anything terrible to really harm you, which somehow made you even more nervous. They were slowly becoming more and more harmful with their hexes, causing you more pain. Until they grew bored of the wand work. You were thrown on the floor, all spells lifted from you, and you thought it was finally over before you were harshly kicked into the stomach. You could hear them laughing as they continued to hit you and kick you around the cold floor. They’ve caused you more then enough harm. You were bleeding from various places and was more than sure that you had a few broken bones as well as a concussion from them throwing you around like a ragdoll. Your foggy brain couldn’t comprehend all that was happening. Both of them suddenly stopped and quietned down as you tried to crawl away from them. The silence was broken with a shout.

“Crucio!” Yelled one of the boys. You couldn’t care less which one, as you were hit with an immense pain. You were on the floor, whirling in pain. You trashed on the ground, somehow in hopes off gettin rid of the pain, but all in vain. You tried to let out a scream, but you weren’t sure if you did because you couldn’t hear anything but their laughter. The curse was lifted and you sucked a breath of air into your lungs, or at least you tried to. You didn’t have time to even move before they’ve casted the curse again. And again and again. You felt like your insides were being twisted and ripped out of you. At that point, you just wanted them to kill you. You didn’t know how much time has passed, before Snape leaned over you.

“You’ll learn where your place is. You don’t deserve to breathe the same air as we do, mugblood. Let this be your lesson. Hopefully one you’ll remember until your pathetic life ends. Which may not be that long, now that I think about it.” You didn’t even notice that the curse wasn’t on you anymore. You couldn’t move, couldn’t see, couldn’t do anything then whisper a pathetic please, hoping your suffering would end soon. He just smirked at you and looked like he wanted to say something else, but Mulciber beat him to it, shouting Crucio once again. There was nothing you could do than just to take it while begging them to stop. You were slipping into unconsciousness, the pain being too much. You couldn’t even tell the difference between being under the curse and not because all you could feel was agony. You thought you heard someone shouting, but it may have just been a hallucination. Opening your eyes, you could make out a silhouette of someone else coming and you were praying to Merlin it wasn’t Malfoy wanting to join in on all the ‘fun’. To your surprise you saw, or at least thought you did, Snape and Mulciber running away, but not before the last curse Snape sent your way. Sectumsempra were the last words of Severus Snape, before he took of, disappearing in the darkness. You realized; you didn’t know pain until now. Your body was on fire and instead of drawing in a breath, you coughed out blood.

“Hey, hey, can you hear me?” Somebody was leaning over you, but you couldn’t make out who it was.

“It’s okay now, please just try to breathe. You’re safe, you’re safe.” Those were the last words before the darkness took over you.

“Lay her here, carefully! And quickly, sent for Dumbledore!”

“I don’t know what to do, I’ve never dealt with something like this.”

“Just hold on, it’s gonna be okay.”

“What the fuck happened?!” “You can’t be here right now, mister Black.”

“This is gonna hurt, dear. I’m so sorry.”

“You’re safe now, my love. I’m never gonna let anything like that happen to you. I swear on my life.”

“What the hell do you mean, they’re not gonna be punished?!” “We are not discussing this topic with you, mister Lupin.” “They can’t just walk away, have you seen what they’ve done to her? She’s fucking dying!” “Enough Remus, please.”

“Please, wake up. I know it’s selfish of me to ask this, considering everything that happened, but please, I really need you to wake up.”

You kept slipping in an out of consciousness, hearing bits and peaces of the conversations happening around you, but the darkness has always won and took you under.

The first thing you felt was something wet on your hand. You tried to open your eyes, but even such easy task seemed like something impossible. You tried to move, but it was like you were under the binding curse all over again. After much effort, you were able to open your eyes very slowly. The bright light made you blink a couple of times, but you were able to recognize your surroundings. The hospital wing. You wanted to sit up, but the pain suddenly consumed you like a tsunami, and a groan tore itself out of your throat.

“You’re awake!” Said a quiet voice. Your eyes met Lily’s beautiful green ones. Tears rolled down her cheeks and the realization that you’ve felt her tears on your hand hit you. You tried to open your mouth to say something, but your throat felt like sandpaper and nothing came out.

“Shh, don’t say anything, its okay. Here, try to drink some water instead.” She handed you a cool glass of water, but you were unable to sit up and drink. When she noticed, more tears welled up in her eyes and she softly squeezed your hand and with the words, that she’ll be back soon left you alone and disappeared behind the white curtains around your bed. You didn’t know how much time passed with you just looking at the ceiling, but Madam Pomfrey was suddenly by your side with some other woman in white.

“This is nurse Bimley, we’re just gonna do a quick check, okay?” She asked and both her and the nurse started to examine you and move you around. They asked you some questions, but you didn’t really pay attention, your mind tired to function properly. With their hands on you and calming words, you fell into the darkness.

Opening you eyes the second time was easier and even adjusting to the light was quicker. You found yourself half sitting, half laying on the hospital bed. Did they move you again? How long has it been since I last woke up? Why am I even here?

“Hey.” Whispered a voice beside you, interrupting your train of thoughts. You looked at the boy sitting on a very uncomfortable looking chair next to your bed. You’d recognize his stormy eyes everywhere, but the ever-present spark in them seemed to disappear, worry replacing it. Your hand was squeezed and you looked on your other side, seeing a scarred hand placed in yours. You felt somewhat calmer knowing that your boyfriends were with you.

“Here, drink this.” Remus lifted a glass of some murky liquid to your mouth waited patiently for you to drink the whole thing and you did even though it tasted like shit. He placed the, now empty, glass on the table, avoiding eye contact the whole time, contrary to your other boyfriend. You were all quiet for a while, just studying each other before Sirius broke the silence.

“How are you feeling, love?” You wanted to answer, but instead of words, you started to cough. To your horror you’ve realized droplets of blood came out of your throat, and Sirius was quick to hold a small bucket near your mouth.

“Shh, its okay darling. Just let it out. It’s okay.” Remus tried to soothe you, suddenly standing next to you. He looked like he wanted to place his hand on your back, but for a reason unknown to you, he decided against it. After your coughing fit, you closed your eyes and tried to properly breathe, which suddenly seemed like almost impossible task. When you calmed down a bit and looked up, you saw Sirius’s eyes pooling with unshed tears. He tried to smile at you reassuringly, but it felt fake.

“We should get madame Pomfrey,” Remus murmured, the words aimed to Sirius who slowly nodded, but before any of them could move, you croaked barely audible no. Your voice sounded like nails on chalkboard, and you cringed before starting to cough again. Sirius held up the bucket again while Remus spoke.

“Okay, okay. We won’t call anyone just yet. Just try to breathe for us darling.” And you did what he told you. He sat on the chair again. After you stopped coughing, you tried to speak once again.

“What..” but before you could finish your sentence, Sirius gently shushed you. “Don’t speak, my love. You need to rest and talking just makes it worse.” You nodded at his words, resting your head on the pillow behind you.

“Do you remember what happened, angel?” Remus asked you carefully to which you just shook your head. You didn’t remember anything; you mind still not working properly. The only thing you knew was that you were in terrible pain. Remus sighed before continuing.

“You were attacked darling. When you were walking from detention, some Slytherin cornered you and..” his voice broke, not being able to finish his sentence. Thankfully, Sirius took over.

“They did horrible, horrible things to you, angel. They didn’t tell us exactly what happened, but it almost killed you.” His voice was barely above a whisper at the end, a single tear rolling down his cheek. It almost killed you kept on replaying in your head over and over again as you started to remember bits and pieces. Their laughter, their hexes and curses, the pain. You didn’t even realize you started shaking before Sirius gently laid his hand on your cheek.

“Hey, hey, baby listen to me, you’re safe now. It’s over and you’re safe, do you hear me? We’re never gonna let anything like that happen to you again, okay? You’re safe with us. I promise.” He tried to calm you but you didn’t register his words as you kept on remembering everything. It felt like you were in a trance, not being able to do anything beside cry and shake, ugly sobs tearing out of your throat. You didn’t even realize that Remus quickly left your side to get Poppy to help you. To you, she appeared out of nowhere, suddenly by your side.

“I told you to get me when she wakes up, mainly to prevent something like this from happening. Now leave us alone and get professor McGonagall.” Both of your boyfriends left rather quickly without a word but sending you a sorry look. You really didn’t want them to leave but were unable to voice you thoughts through the sobbing. The sweet nurse got you to calm down after a while of sweet talk and reassurance that you were safe.

“Let me check the injuries, okay?” She asked but already started to take off your hospital robe that you didn’t even notice you were wearing. Underneath your whole body was bandaged, some of the bandages red from the blood seeping through them, you could see black and blue bruises where your skin was showing and you felt like you were going to be sick. Madam Pomfrey, thankfully, saw that coming and quickly brought a bucket to your mouth, the same that Sirius gave you earlier, and you puked your guts out, all that while she whispered calming words to you. When you were done, you closed your eyes and let the nurse rewrap your wounds after rubbing some ointment on them. The second she was done, professor McGonagall came into sight with Dumbledore on her heels, it was like they scented they could come.

“Good evening miss Y/S. How are you feeling?” He asked you politely, his eyes searching yours. You shrugged your shoulders, not trusting yourself to talk just yet.

“Do you remember what happened?” He asked you again to which you just nodded your head, avoiding eye contact with anyone.

“I know its hard, but would you be able to tell us what happened?” You dreaded this question, but took a deep breath before finally answering verbally. You vaguely told them the events of that night. I don’t even know how long I was asleep ran through your head, but you pushed it aside and continued talking. About how they cornered you, taking your want and hexing you. How they grew tired of it after a while and decided to beat you up. How they used one of the Unforgivables on you before someone came to your rescue. How they ran but not before sending some unknown spell in your way. By the end, you were silently crying once again.

“Thank you, dear. You should rest now. Don’t worry about anything else. I’ll come and talk to you when you feel better.” Professor McGonagall thanked you and you heard in her voice how sorry she felt for you. You sent a smile her way, or at least tried to, before they left you again.

“You should really rest now. I’ve put some sleeping and calming draught next to your bed, if you want it.” Madame Pomfrey decided and went to leave you alone before you stopped her.

“May I speak to Remus and Sirius please?” You pleaded with her before adding “it’d make me feel much more at ease.” To which the nurse nodded before disappearing behind the curtain, hopefully snatching the boys. And soon enough, Remus’s head poked from behind the curtain, smiling at you soflty.

“Hi there, darling. James and Lily are here to see you, if you feel like it. If not, that’s completely okay and they understand. Anything to make you comfortable.” You smiled at his thoughtfulness, and you considered it for a second. You didn’t want your friends to see you in such state but you knew that seeing them would make you feel better so you nodded. Soon enough, around your bed were the four most important people of your life. You gently smiled at them, feeling calmer already. Remus carefully sat on your bed, Sirius in the chair next to him with Lily in the chair and James standing next to her on your other side.

“Hi.” you said timidly. Lily almost started to cry when she heard your voice and James laid a protective hand or her shoulder, smiling gently at you.

“Hello there, sunshine.” He responded just as gently.

“Are you feeling any better?” Remus asked you carefully, not wanting to make you cry again or overall worsen your state. You didn’t know whether to say yes or no so you just shrugged.

“I’m so glad you’re okay. We were all so worried.” Lily whispered, looking deep into your eyes. A flashback of her crying when you woke up suddenly popped up in your mind.

“You were here, before I mean.” You realized, looking at her.

“We were all here at some point. You kept on waking up and falling asleep the whole time you were here.” She looked like she wanted to add something, but her quiet sobs prevented it.

“Yeah, you’ve been here for two days. We sneaked in whenever we could. Sometimes you woke up and started babbling some nonsense, sometimes you just screamed. Do you remember any of that?” James added and that’s when you noticed the dark circles under all of their eyes. You felt bad for making them so worried.

“No. I mean, I remember some of it, but it’s all blurry. I remember some other woman tho, I think she was a nurse.” You tried to fish for your memories, but nothing else came to the surface.

“That was nurse Bimley, she came from St. Mungo’s after Dumbledore sent for someone to help you.” Lily explained, now more composed, but it left you even more confused.

“Why? What happened?” You decided to ask, wanting to hear their side of the story. They all looked at each other in apprehension, apart from Sirius, who was uncharacteristically quiet and avoiding eye contact, before Remus decided to put you out of your misery and explain.

“When you didn’t come from your detention, we started to worry. The more time passed, the more terrified we were. James tried to look for the map, but we’ve put it somewhere and none of us were able to find it. We kept on telling ourselves that you were fine, and that Minnie was just making you work extra hard, so we didn’t go to search for you. Something that I’ll never forgive myself for and I’m terribly sorry for it, love.” He took your hand into his and softly squeezed before continuing. “Then some Gryffindor prefect bursted into the command room, ordering everyone to go to bed, that there was an attack on a student, and we weren’t to leave our dorms. I felt my soul leave my body at his words, I swear. We didn’t even take the cloak, we just ran straight to the infirmary. There, we saw...” but before he could continue, Sirius interrupted him, his eyes unfocused as if he was remembering the night.

“It was Reggie. He found you and took you straight to Madam Pomfrey. He saved your life. We found him sitting on the floor, looking like he might pass out or puke. When he spotted us, he quickly started to explain how he didn’t have anything to do with it, how he wasn’t part of it and just tried to help you. I was so confused at that minute but when I saw the look on his face… I just knew that something horrible must have happened to you.” He exhaled, still not looking at you. It was Regulus who helped you. Regulus saved your life. You were tremendously grateful for Sirius’s little brother. Sirius took a deep breath.

“After he calmed down, he explained what happened. Told us that he was just wandering around when he heard screaming, so he went to see what was going on. He found you on the floor with Snape and Mulciber above you with wands in their hands. Doesn’t take a genius to know what was going on. He went to you aid, yelling at them to leave you alone. Before he could make it to your side, they ran away, but Snivellus casted some weird curse at the very last moment. We don’t know what it was but..” he choked on his words, not being able to continued. You could feel the anxiety from remembering that night rolling off of him. James decided to add to his speech.

“It slashed up your whole body.” He said before Remus send a dark and disapproving look his was which shut him up pretty quickly. Thank Merlin for Lily who decided to carry on explaining before the two of them started fighting.

“The curse made numerous of gashes appear on your body, they were all so deep and you were slowly, but surely bleeding out. If Regulus hadn’t brought you to the infirmary so quickly, you’d bleed to death.” She said quietly, not looking into your eyes.

“We heard Poppy screaming at Dumbledore to sent for help, that she wouldn’t be able to safe you by herself. Then he and McGonagall came out of the door and saw us. I don’t think they were even surprised to see us there. Dumbledore left without saying a word, surely to sent for someone from St. Mungo’s, while Minnie stayed behind. She was crying but tried to look strong for us. Told us that you were hurt really badly, but that they were going to help you. Then she made us all leave with a promise that we would be updated as soon as she knew something. She walked us all back to our dorms, even Regulus, to make sure that we wouldn’t try to stay. But once inside the common room, we just snatched the cloak and decided that one of us would always be by your side and we were until you woke up. And now we’re here.” Remus ended the story and a long pause followed. You tried to compose your thoughts but it all seemed too much for you. So I did scream. Your head started to hurt and you were just so fucking exhausted from everything.

“We’re gonna let you rest now, Merlin knows you need it. We’ll be back tomorrow, I promise. I hope you’ll feel better, sunshine.” James broke the silence first and he gently kissed your forehead.

“Thank you, Jamie. For everything. You too, Lils. Please, try to get some proper sleep as well, okay?” You pleaded with them and softly.

“Only you would worry about us getting some sleep while laying in a hospital bed.” Lily shook her head but laughed a little bit and you smiled at them as James took Lily’s hands and they both left, leaving you with your boys.

“I’m so fucking incredibly sorry, my love. We promised you that we wouldn’t let anything happen to you and look where we are now. I’m so so so sorry.” Remus whispered, ashamed of himself.

“We won’t let anything like that happen to you again. I swear on my life. We failed you once, but it’ll never happen again, okay? I’d rather die than seeing you like this again. I’m so sorry, my darling.” Sirius apologized as well and your hear hurt for them.

“This wasn’t your fault, you couldn’t have done anything. I don’t blame you and never will. Please, don’t blame yourself either. I’ll be okay.” You tried to reassure them, wishing they wouldn’t be so hard on themselves.

“But it is out fault. We should’ve protect you but instead left you alone to your misery.” Sirius kept on beating himself but you were quick to stop him.

“Please, don’t. You can’t be with me every second and that’s okay. You’re here now and that’s what matters.” Remus looked like he wanted to say something as well, but you stopped him. “Let’s talk some more tomorrow. I’m exhausted and in pain and I just want to sleep. I’m here and I’m alive, that’s what matters.”

“Of course, of course. We’re gonna leave you to rest. Merlin knows you need it. We’ll come back tomorrow.” Remus said as he started to stand up, but you quickly shot your hand to stop him, the quick move making your whole body ache again and you let out a groan. Sirius quickly brought the draughts that Pomfrey left for you to drink and you happily did so while smiling at him in thankfulness.

“Please stay, I don’t wan to be alone.” You whisper shyly when you’ve set the potion down, still holding Remus’s hand. He smiled at you gently but looked unsure.

“Are you sure? You need to get some sleep and we don’t wanna bother you or make you uncomfortable.” He made sure to know you’re comfortable.

“You could never make me uncomfortable. Please, I really need you right now.” You assured him and pleaded with both of them to which Remus nodded and performed a spell to make your bed bigger so all three of you would fit and have space.

“Oh, thank Merlin. I don’t think I’d be able to leave you alone tonight.” Sirius sighed as he laid next to you, very careful not to hurt you. You smiled at his words and turned to him.

“Have you talked to Regulus?” You whispered to him while Remus drew the curtain shut and went to lay on your other side.

“Yeah, sent him a message thanking him and telling him you were okay. He asked if he could see you.” He whispered back to you and gently put his arm under your head, to pull you just a bit closer.

“I’d like that. I wanna thank him myself.”

“I’ll let him know tomorrow. Wanna talk to him myself. But now sleep and don’t worry about a thing okay?” He kissed your head just as Remus lied on your other side and took you into his arms slowly, waiting for a sign of discomfort from you but when you didn’t show any, she kissed your head as well before whispering.

“Sleep now, my darling angel. We’ll be here when you wake up and then every second for the rest of our lives.”

#the marauders #marauders era #marauders x y/n #poly!marauders x reader #sirius black x you #remus lupin x you #sirius black x reader #remus lupin x reader #wolfstar x reader #wolfstar angst #angst #harry potter #marauders x reader #remus x sirius x reader #fluff

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finelinevogue · 3 months

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sad beginnings,

summary - everyone sees you as this weird and crazy ravenclaw. everyone except remus and sirius. part 2

pairing - ravenclaw!reader x wolfstar

word count - ~1.5k

[part 1]

Your face stung like a swarm of bees.

The pace you were running through the corridors, causing the cold wind to cut through the cat scratches on your face were so sore. Cat scratches that had been put there purposefully by someone who didn’t like you; Darcy.

Her and her band of Ravenclaw elites thought they ran the House, including Philip who was like the devil incarnate. They have never liked you and have turned the majority of the school against you, claiming that you’re weird and crazy.

Weird? Maybe. Crazy? Well, you certainly wouldn’t use your pet cat to scratch out someone’s cheek just because you had a little more power over them.

Now you were going to have to walk in late to Potions, all because you’d left your textbook in your dorm and then had a run-in with Darcy and her cat.

You’d cleaned up the wound the best you could, but it was just so sore now.

The tears stung in your eyes, willing you to set them free. However, you had already figured out that tears in your cuts were worse than holding back the tears.

You took a deep breath before walking into the Potions class that Professor Slughorn taught.

He didn’t particularly care for favourites and he didn’t really have least favourites, but he did make a deal about his students being late to his lessons.

The door made a loud screech as it opened. Way to walk in subtly.

You kept your head down as everyone’s eyes turned to yours.

Lots of whispering started up and it no doubt had everything to the scratches down your cheek, and the fact you were never ever late.

“Ah. Nice of you to join us, Miss L/N.” Professor Slughorn spoke, making you cringe at his tone.

“Sorry I’m late, Sir.” You looked up at him and saw him cringe in return as he saw your cheek. He made no move to comment on it though.

“Take a seat now, please. See me after class for a detention.”

You shamefully dropped your head. Now your perfect record would be screwed over.

Sirius dramatically stood up from his chair, the sound of metal upon the stone floor grating everyone’s ears to pieces.

“Actually that won’t be necessary, Sir. Y/N gave me her textbook since I’d forgotten mine at breakfast, so Y/N went to the Hall for me to retrieve it. Wouldn’t want your precious textbooks going missing, Professor.”

“Oh, well, never mind then.” Slughorn shrugged. Sirius knew he was wrapped around Slughorn’s finger and used it to his advantage to save you a detention.

You looked over to him and smiled in thanks, but Sirius didn’t smile back. Neither did Remus. They were both looking at you with concern, or at least what you thought was concern. It might be anger for nearly getting them in trouble.

James tugged on Sirius’ shirt for him to sit down again. Sirius tugged away from him though, fists clenching against his sides as he watched you.

You attempted to find a seat then.

You walked over to a table full of other Ravenclaw girls in your year, but the one empty seat at the table instantly became unavailable as a girl dumped her bag on the chair next to her.

“Seats taken.”

“Oh, sorry.” You said softly, walking to another table where there were only three of them sat. Plenty of room.

You went to pull out a chair next to one of the guys there, only to realise there was black ink all over the stool for some reason - meaning it was also unavailable.

“Tough luck.” One of the boys said and the rest snickered.

“Miss L/N, why don’t you just go and sit over there.” Slughorn pointed his hand over to where an empty table was. It should’ve seated 6 people, but currently no one was sat there.

You nodded your head and quickly made your way to the table before any more attention could be drawn towards you.

It was a table at the back of the room and quite far out of sight of the blackboard, making it difficult to copy out the notes. You tried your best.

At one point during the lesson you turned your head to the wall to let out a few tears, knowing no one could see you. A few salty tears burned over your wound, but you bit on your lip to cover the sob that wanted to erupt from your chest.

This really fucking sucked.

You were all for self-wallowing, but when it was in the middle of a class you hated it.

There was a time and a place for it and it was not here and it wasn’t now.

You dug your blunt fingernails, from all the anxious biting, into your palms to suppress the emotions you wanted to let out. Focusing on the lesson and Slughorn’s words were your best chance of getting through this.

You were busy writing away, trying to keep up with the notes, when you felt someone sit down next to you. Your natural instinct was to tense and shuffle away only slightly, because who wanted to sit next to you if not to torment you further?

“Y/N?”

You were shocked to see Remus sat next to you.

“Oh, hi, Remus. Are you okay? Am I in the way or something?” You looked around you to make sure you weren’t.

“No, no! We- I mean, I, just wanted to ask you something?” He stumbled over his words.

“Sure.”

“Uh.. Well….”

“Oh my God, Remus! Are you okay?” You gasped when you saw a cut along his forehead, which was hidden beneath his hair and you’d only seen because of how close you were sitting.

So close, in fact, that you could smell his cologne: Cedar wood and… something else.

“Me? Are you seriously asking me that right now?” He looked shocked and you blushed like mad.

“I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked, it wasn’t my place. I apologise.” You shook your head and tried to refocus on your work.

“Y/N…” Remus said ever so softly.

His voice was so pretty. So delicate.

Sirius’ was more rough and deeper. Both were a song to listen to.

You didn’t reply, thinking that if you just ignored them he wouldn’t be mad at you anymore. Because he was mad, right? You shouldn’t have questioned something so personal about him.

“Y/N?” He asked again.

You’d never get over hours name sounded coming from him.

Slowly, you tilted your head towards him. Instead of being met with a furious gaze you were met with something much softer. His warm eyes looked troubled.

You looked at him nervously, hoping for the best out of whatever this situation was.

He reached up a hand towards your face, a couple of rings placed on his ridiculously well structured fingers. You followed the movement of his hand, whilst Remus followed your eyes.

His fingers carefully brushed your fallen hair that covered your cheek and only slightly pushed it to the side, his fingers barely touching your skin.

You let out a shaky breath.

You were one to wear your emotions on your sleeve and Remus had you feeling very nervous in that moment. Not nervous like you’d been around Darcy or Philip. A different kind. A better kind.

“Who did this to you?” He asked.

You looked up to see him studying the cuts like you’d seen him in the library studying for a test. He was trying to map out all the details of your scratches, so it seemed.

“What?”

“Please, Y/N. Let us know who did this to you? Hell, even what did this?”

“Us?” Was the word you chose to focus on.

“Yes—.”

“Mr Lupin, there’s a time and a place for funny business and it won’t be in my classroom.” Slughorn broke whatever moment had happened between you and Remus.

Remus had been quick to drop your hair, apologise and return to his seat.

Your cheeks flushed red with the thought of someone catching you looking, almost, intimate with Remus.

Oh God.

What if Sirius had seen?

You looked over to where Remus had rejoined Sirius. Remus was whispering to Sirius whilst you watched Sirius’ jaw click.

The chill that surpassed you when Sirius turned to face you across the room told you everything you needed to know.

Stay. The hell. Away. From. My boyfriend.

•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-•

As Slughorn finished the class Remus quickly tried to stuff everything into his satchel before everyone left without him.

“C’mon! Hurry up!” Sirius urged him - only because he obviously didn’t have his own bag and made Remus carry everything.

“Shut it.” Remus snipped, shoving his textbook in his bag before grabbing his cloak and moving.

“Hey, calm down.” Sirius tried to soothe him, slipping his hand into Remus’.

“Calm down— Are you insane?”

“A bit.”

“How am I supposed to be calm when half of Y/N’s face is missing?” Remus whisper shouted and Sirius quickly pushed him back against a stone wall for a time-out.

“Calm down. I mean it, Rem.”

Remus let the cool of the stone wall sink in through his skin and allow him to breathe again.

He didn’t know what was coming over him recently.

“Y/N’s gone now, because I couldn’t pull myself together.” Remus sighed.

Sirius brought his hand up to cup underneath Remus’ chin lightly, making it so he had no choice but to look at him.

“Look at me.” Remus tried to move away, but Sirius’ hands held strong. “Hey, don’t. Look at me. We are going to find Y/N and get to the bottom of whatever has happened, okay? But you need to calm down first.”

Remus let his shoulders exhale and he nodded. “Okay.”

Sirius smiled, leaning in to give Remus a few kisses. One for listening to him and another just because he loved him so much. Sirius could really feel Remus calming down after those.

“I just… Y/N is… she means…” Remus struggled to find the right words to say, but it didn’t really matter.

“I know. She means the same to me.”

Sirius rested his forehead against Remus, as they calmed each other and maybe one day hoping you’d be right there beside them.

#wolfstar angst #wolfstar fic #wolfstar #wolfstar x reader #wolfstar x reader angst #ravenclaw reader fic #harry potter fic #marauders era fic #marauders x reader #wolfstar x ravenclaw reader #wolfstar blurbs #sad beginnings finelinevogue #finelinevogue masterlist #polywolfstar x reader #poly!wolfstar

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paintmegrey · 8 months

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Sirius and Regulus only knowing how to get their crushes’ attention through arguments because that’s the only way they could get it from their parents. 😬

#i’m very funny #black brother angst #regulus black #sirius black #james potter #wolfstar #jegulus angst #starchaser #jegulus #wolfstar angst #remus lupin #marauders #marauders brainrot

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cndarts · 1 year

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angst!! :D

from that time a read a bunch of fics of wolfstar rising harry and sirius getting out of azkaban sooner

#bittersweet feeling #i live in denial #gay dads!#lil harry ily #marauders fanart #marauders #sirius black #remus lupin #wolfstar #siriusxremus #harry potter #wolfstar angst

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aspiring-artist-em · 6 months

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They never got married.

Not really.

But Sirius likes to count the one time they went to London and used the muggle marriage machine. It was like magic, how the screen lit up and displayed vows. Sirius was hanging onto his lover's arm as he input their names.

"Love, you have to let go, I need to get my coin."

Sirius remembers groaning and releasing his hold for a brief minute, choosing to wrap himself around his boyfriend's waist. He earned himself a chuckle. Sirius would cling to the sound of that laugh, grasp at the memory to keep himself sane.

The machine chimed. Sirius was guided in front of the screen, the prompt reading, "Sirius Black, do you take --- to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

Sirius had smiled and clicked "I do."

His lover did the same.

The sound of the machine whirring to life filled their ears, the gears turning inside the broken down thing marking themselves known, until it chimed as a small thud could be heard. His lover reached in and grabbed the small container, getting on one knee and revealing a ring. Sirius remembers the way he smiled and nodded as his lover slipped it over his finger and sealed their counterfeit matrimony with a kiss.

They never got married.

Not really.

After the sentencing, when Sirius was shoveled into Azkaban, Remus had thrown away that ring. It was cheap plastic, he had no use for it. And besides, why would he want to be tied to the man who betrayed and killed his best friends. He wasn't the man Remus thought he was, therefore their relationship was nothing but fake, a game of childhood pretend. It never happened, as far as Remus was concerned.

Besides, Remus was better off without Sirius, and so the ring now lies in a landfill on the outskirts of London, and the two had never even dated.

They never got married.

Not really.

But Sirius refuses to let the memory go, and the ring still sits on his finger, broken down by the wear and tear of twelve years in prison. It falls off of his bony fingers, but it's miraculously still there. Sirius twists it around and around and around to ground himself and oh, the memory keeps his fragile mind from shattering beyond repair.

Sirius just wishes he could remember who he made it with.

#ems writing #wolfstar #marauders #sirius black #sirius orion black #marauder era #remus lupin #remus x sirius #harry potter #sirius angst #remus angst #wolfstar angst #writing #haven't posted in a while #here we go again

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slytherweasley · 1 year

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Crushing (dbf!wolfstar x reader)

Warnings: age gap (legal), kissing, nipple play, mentions scars, oral (f&m giving/receiving), penetration, fingering, unprotected sex, female reader

Summary: James Potter’s oldest child comes back to England to help her brother with the war. Y/n stays at Grimmauld place with her late father’s best friends but she can’t get over her feelings for them.

You hadn’t seen any of your family or father’s friends since you were a child. After your parents died you were separated from your brother and sent to a kind family in France who were willing to hide you until you were of age.

Last year you became of age and this year you decided to move back to help your brother who you hadn’t seen in years but you never stopped contacting him. Over the past few weeks you’d met so many people who had been desperate to meet you. You immediately had a lot of involvement in the order since you were the closest thing to a parent to your younger brother.

You’d met Sirius Black and Remus Lupin for the first time, you’d heard so much about them, seen many pictures and yet you’d never expected to meet two more handsome men in your life. Their charm makes you blush every time.

“You look just like your parents, I can’t believe I didn’t instantly recognise you” Remus says his hand brushing your cheek. When you first met the two men they were confused by your presence, Molly Weasley explained you are James and Lily’s daughter. “You’ve grown up to be such a beautiful young woman, at first we were just stunned by your beauty” Sirius says making your cheeks turn red. Sirius was kind enough to let you stay with him and Remus at Grimmauld place instead of cooped up at the Weasley’s burrow.

Your room is across from Remus and Sirius’ room each time you walk past it, you have the urge to knock on the door and crawl into bed with them. You know you would never considering you just met them and it’s probably wrong for you to want to get into bed with your dead father’s best friends.

But the more you get to know them the more you long for them. They treat you like a princess, you don’t have to lift a finger, something as simple as taking your plate to the sink is too much. Not to mention the pet names that make your heart pound and pussy wet. They are very affectionate with you, there were many instances where things have gotten so touchy you had to stop yourself from leaning in to kiss them.

After dinner the two men meet you in the living room with a bottle of expensive alcohol.

“I just want to thank you for letting me stay in your home, everyone has been so welcoming and I really enjoy spending time with you two” “it is no trouble darling” Sirius’ lips brush against your cheek and then he presses a kiss to it. “Oh god” you sigh “something wrong, baby?” Remus asks rubbing your thigh when noticing your change in expression. “When you guys touch me it’s hard not to kiss you” “then don’t try to resist” Remus says his face getting closer to yours but you go in for the kiss.

As you’re kissing Remus, Sirius’ hands are on your waist and kissing your neck, Remus pulls you onto his lap. You pull away to kiss Sirius, his hands move to your hair pulling it the way you like it. You feel Remus’ erection growing underneath you “Let’s go to our room, it will be much comfier” Remus picks you up and you wrap your legs around his waist.

Remus gently places you on the bed and the two men help you undress you down to your underwear. You so desperately want to see them naked. You kneel on the bed and help Remus out of his shirt, you notice the scars you find them very attractive but make an effort to only glance at them once since you’d heard he’s quite insecure about his transformation.

Meanwhile, Sirius is already shirtless and kissing you again. Both men now had painful erections, you found it kind of hot that you’d only snogged and they were so aroused, you weren’t one to judge you were wet the moment you laid eyes on them.

You pull away briefly and Remus plays with the straps on your bra letting them fall and unclasps your bra letting your breasts fall. “Oh darling, look at those perky things” Sirius wastes no time in taking one into his mouth, Remus follows suit placing kisses on your boob and flicking your nipples with his tongue.

Sirius kisses down your stomach while Remus pays close attention to your sensitive nipples, he begins nibbling on them making you groan and throw your head back. At the same time, Sirius pulls your underwear down and spreads your legs letting out a groan at the sight of your glistening pussy.

“Prettier than I imagined” Sirius says running a finger through your folds making you whimper, he puts his finger to his mouth sucking on it “God, you taste so good.”

Sirius’ head moves between your legs kissing up your thighs and taking the time to suck on your upper thighs causing you to squirm. Suddenly, he dives into your pussy making you let out a loud moan, his tongue works your clit and finger slides inside you.

Remus kisses your lips again before standing beside the bed and undoing his pants, you help him with his underwear pulling it down to reveal his big aching cock. “Fucking hell” you groan and take him into your mouth, you found it hard to take him all the way as you kept choking. Sirius takes a breath and watches you choking on Remus’ cock.

“Just wait until he’s inside you, darling you’re going to be so full” Sirius says.

You taste the precum on your tongue the taste fuelling you to take him as far as you can without gagging until you choke. “Feels amazing darling, keep going.”

Sirius has multiple fingers deep inside you bringing you close to your orgasm. “That’s it Princess, squeeze around my fingers, let it go” you take your mouth off Remus’ dick letting yourself ride your orgasm.

Remus flips you around while you’re still recovering. Remus takes you from the back slowly sliding inside you “Fuck” he lets out a long groan “so fuckin’ wet” he mutters and begins pounding into you. Sirius tugs his pants and underwear down pumping himself at the sight of the both of you.

“Siri, lemme suck your cock” you say breathless, Sirius guides his cock to your mouth. Each moan vibrates through Sirius’ sensitive cock “oh princess, I’m going to cum if you keep going.”

Remus rubs your clit with his free hand and you get closer, “Fuck I’m close” Remus says as you find yourself squeezing around his cock. Remus finishes inside you and you almost collapse after finishing so hard. Remus holds you up and Sirius pulls out of your mouth. “Did so well my darling girl” Remus says.

Sirius sits in the middle of the bed stroking his cock. You and Remus make your way over to him and suck him off together. “Fuck” Sirius groans as you and Remus lick from base to tip and suck on his tip. You kiss down his cock and take his balls into your mouth while Remus takes him in his mouth.

“So close” Sirius throws his head back moaning until Remus pulls out “Cum on her tongue” he says and Sirius kneels in front of you stroking his cock until he eventually finishes and you swallow his cum.

You were so incredibly tired, you lay beside the two boys in their bed as they take care of you, cleaning you up. “Oh Darling, look at you” Remus kisses your forehead “It’s okay, go to sleep, honey” Sirius rubs your back and shoulders placing lots of kisses to your skin as you drift off to sleep.

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jaioes · 2 months

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“You said we’d clean when we got back, now that mess is a ghost i cant bare to deal with” 18 june 1996 as remus returns home alone

.im sorry

(Im not)

All my links including coms and patreon (shameless plug)

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sstarmoon · 2 months

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When Remus told Sirius that Freddie Mercury had died during the time he was in Azkaban, Sirius didn't cry, he didn't say anything, but he felt a horrible lump in his throat that went all the way to his chest. He felt in some way that everything he had ever loved, when he was still young and happy, was abandoning him. Slipping out of his hands. And so it was. Death seemed to be infatuated with him, chasing him but never catching him. Killing all of his loved ones but not him.

“He died, Sirius.” Remus said in a gentle voice, as if he was afraid of hurting the fragile, skeletal man in front of him. Sirius looked at him, silently, as if in shock, and some tears began to run down his cheeks when a thought came to his mind; Oh, death, don't take this one from me. Not this one.

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lookingforsneha · 2 days

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Do you guys have any wolfstar fic recs? I'll read just about anything that's good, but if you've got something post-prank, that would be awesome! It's all I can think about right now.

#remus lupin #wolfstar #marauders era #remus x sirius #the marauders #sirius orion black #wolfstar angst #anything for our moony #james potter

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jamespotterbbg · 1 month

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sirius ‘i would die for you’ black & remus ‘i would live for you’ lupin

#marauders #marauders era #the marauders #marauders fandom #the marauders era #incorrect marauders quotes #remus lupin #sirius black #cute wolfstar #wolfstar #wolfstar angst #sirius and remus #sirius x lupin #sirius orion black #remus loves sirius #remus x sirius #remus john lupin #show some damn appreciation to wolfstar

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lulublack90 · 24 days

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Prompt 29 - Memory Potion

@wolfstarmicrofic March 29, word count 337

Sirius sat on the bathroom floor, raking his claw-like hands through his hair, trying in vain to recall his lost memories. The dementors had stolen so much. But Remus had said there was a possibility that the memories could be recovered the longer he was away from the foul creatures. He wasn’t so sure.

He’d been taking the memory potions every morning when Remus handed them to him after breakfast and shut himself in the bathroom to help him concentrate on the fuzzy images the potion helped retrieve.

“Gahhh!” He yelled as he yanked his hair, pulling chunks of his grey-streaked hair out. The door opened, and Remus was holding him.

“Shhhh, sweetheart. It’s okay.” Remus soothed, stroking his hands down Sirius’s thin back.

“What if I never remember?” He looked up sadly at the man he barely remembered. He knew they were more than the friends his broken memory showed him, but he just couldn’t get a grasp on the lost memories. Remus was being so kind and gentle with him, and he just kept letting him down.

“Then we make new memories,” He said, smiling calmly at Sirius. Sirius hadn’t been completely happy with Remus’s answer, but he kept quiet and didn’t argue.

Every morning, he took the potion and every morning, nothing happened. His memory was still patchy and dark.

Then, one night, he had a dream. He dreamt of red bed hangings and whispered words as a warm body pressed against his naked skin.

In the morning, he met Remus in the kitchen and kissed his cheek as though it was the most normal thing in the world. As he reached around him to grab his cup of coffee.

“Why are you staring at me?” He asked as he sat down at the kitchen table.

“You kissed me,” Remus told him.

“I—I—I…” He stammered. Remus held out the vial of Memory Potion, and Sirius automatically drank it.

Bright, vivid memories long lost to him suddenly flooded his mind. He had to close his eyes as they flashed past so quickly.

When he opened his eyes again, Remus was watching him carefully. He smiled up at the man he now knew better than he knew himself. “Hi, darling. Did you miss me?”

#wolfstar #wolfstar microfic #wolfstar fic #wolfstar angst #wolfstar fluff #sirius black #remus lupin #dead gay wizards #sirius orion black #remus john lupin #sirius x remus #remus x sirius #sirius and remus #remus and sirius #post azkaban sirius #memory potion

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strwbi-laces · 9 months

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Sirius always insists he has a terrible memory. "Really terrible," he'll laugh. "Actually, what was your name again?"

Remus doesn't see it though. Not when Sirius always knows exactly where James left his socks, or what obscure extracurricular Pete's packed into his schedule now. Especially not when he learnt the dates for every full moon in the next fifty years when researching lycanthropy.

"You know, I don't think your memory is as bad as you say Padfoot," he mentions while they're alone in the dorm. Remus doesn't have a clue where James and Pete are but Sirius wouldn't even have to check the map.

"What're you on about? It's literally rubbish."

Remus raises a brow. "You had every single possible quidditch infraction stuck in your brain - before James did!"

"Yeah well," Sirius shrugs. "That's quidditch. It's just for stuff I care about."

Reaching over and grabbing the nearest textbook, History of Magic: Year 3, Remus flips to a random chapter. "Really? You cannot convince be you care about, hmm," he clears his throat and in his poshest, most snooty voice, says "Changes in potion composition during the French occupation of England." No one could care about that. Not even he did and he actually liked History of Magic.

At least the voice made Sirius giggle. "Shut up. History is easy, it's just dates."

"Then what isn't?"

"Uhh, I don't know," Sirius goes quiet more a moment, then laughs again. Though this time it doesn't quite reach his eyes. "See, this is what I mean."

Remus waits while Sirius works his tongue into words.

"I can't really remember much from my childhood. Sometimes my mum will say something, like 'you were such a difficult child, remember when you did so-and-so' and I pull up a complete blank. Merlin that's bad of me, huh? Forgetting how I hurt people."

Sirius' fists ball up in his lap and Remus wants nothing more than to take them between his hands and smooth them out. He settles for shuffling closer and pressing their sides together.

"And I make things up. That feels like a memory thing too. It's not out of thin air but in my head I'll make something my mum said seem a lot worse than it was. Or I'll forget what prompted it so she seems like the bad guy. Usually I'd call her a lying cunt y'know, but even my dad and Reg agree that it's something I do a lot. Making myself the victim."

He's shaking now, Remus can feel his tremors ripping through him as well. "Sorry," Sirius sniffs. "I'm doing it right now-" he tries to say but Remus cuts him off.

"I think," he whispers, taking hold of Sirius' hand in his palm and tracing the heart line with his finger, "that you're a far better person than you give yourself credit for. And maybe your mum is a bit of a lying cunt."

#tw gaslighting #cw memory issues #smart sirius as the lord (james potter) intended him to be #its so unfun not trusting ur own brain #sirius black #remus lupin #wolfstar #marauders era #marauders #wolfstar angst

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finelinevogue · 3 months

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sad beginnings,

summary - everyone sees you as this weird and crazy ravenclaw. everyone except remus and sirius.

pairing - ravenclaw!reader x wolfstar

word count - ~2.5k

You thought breakfast would be better than a bowl of porridge, but that’s what you get for waking up late.

You’d overslept on your alarm clock by 45 minutes and were now paying the consequences by eating disgusting gruel for breakfast. There wasn’t even any honey to drizzle on top, thanks to some older Ravenclaws hogging it for their pancakes.

Half the tables were empty, as people started to head off for their first lessons of the day.

You had potions in half an hour.

Potions was one of your favourite lessons of the day, not because you liked the subject - in fact you despised it - but because you got to secretly crush on two of the prettiest boys in school.

Remus Lupin and Sirius Black.

They were currently the only group of Gryffindors still at their table, making a rather loud ruckus as they stood up from the table to leave.

James was teasing Lily about something and Sirius and Remus couldn’t stop laughing over it. Lily pretended to be offended and fake punched Sirius for laughing at her, only to have Remus lean down only slightly and kiss Sirius’ clothed arm all better.

It didn’t help that the two boys you would of course have a heavy crush on would already be in a well established relationship.

I mean, they were the prettiest boys in the school and they were opposites to each other so their relationship made perfect sense.

You just wished you had gotten there with one of them first. But who? You admired them both the same.

Both of them had—

“Oi, Y/N!” A Ravenclaw in your year, named Philip, shouted from down the table, making your porridge slide off your spoon and splat against the table.

You looked towards where Philip and his band of quite mean friends sat.

“Daydreaming about boys you could never get, again?!” Philip laughed, causing others around him to as well.

You didn’t reply. You knew better than to reply. Just keep your head down and trouble should go away.

Your eyes drifted from Philip over to where the Gryffindors had nearly exited the Hall, only Sirius and Remus had stopped just shy of leaving.

They were stood talking to each other.

“Who is it this time Y/N? Hm?” Darcy, one of Philip’s friends teased.

“Remember when Y/N tried to date Isaac? As if she could ever date him.” Someone else joked.

You looked back down at your porridge, still listening to them but trying your best to block them out.

Looking at your breakfast made you think about Isaac. He was just as bland and boring. Until he wanted to have sex with you and you really didn’t want that, well then he became an absolute prick. Started spreading horrible rumours about you, showing his true colours.

Isaac started spreading stories about how you tried to come onto him, only to deny him. How you had been weird and crazy the entire night, when in fact it was the opposite.

Now everyone thinks you’re weird, a prude and a bitch.

One of the reasons you have no friends.

Isaac had managed to isolate you and Philip and his cronies had taken advantage of that.

“Think she was looking at Remus and Sirius.” Someone snickered, making you love uncomfortably.

“No way! Y/N has hots for the dogs,” They thought they were funny, “Is that true, Y/N? You want Remus and Sirius to be your little boyfriends?”

They all laughed, until they went silent.

“You alright, Phil? Can I call you Phil?”

Your head shot up to see Sirius leaning down over the bench next to Philip, resting his palms on the table and glaring him down. Remus stood right behind him.

Your heart rate increased at the sight of them magically appearing.

Did they hear? Did they know? Were they in on the sad and pathetic joke?

“It’s just Philip.” Philip gulped.

“Great, Phil.” Sirius smiled, but it definitely wasn’t genuine. “We heard your filthy mouth speak our names and, well, I for one don’t like pricks speaking about me or my boyfriend behind me back. So keep your goddamn mouth shut or I’ll hex you back to Year 1. Okay?”

“Uhhh…”

“I said, okay?” Sirius asked again.

“Yes, yes!” Philip stuttered.

“Good.” Sirius moved back to stand up.

It was lovely that Sirius had come over here to defend his boyfriend like that. You craved someone having the kindness, and definitely the courage, to stand up for you like that.

You watched as Sirius took Remus’ hand and you wondered what that felt like.

You could imagine Sirius’ hands being quite rough and Remus’ hands being calloused, but both still having a sense of softness to them. They’d both be very grounding and warm to hold on to.

Then they both walked your way.

You quickly started to eat your porridge again, keeping your head down. You don’t think either of them would make a scene with you, but maybe they’d caught on to your gazes and blushing and they’d had enough.

You thought you were subtle but maybe you’d been far more obvious than you intended. You cursed yourself, but only knew it was a matter of time before you made a fool of yourself.

Maybe they weren’t even walking towards you. Why would they? They didn’t know you, except for your name maybe.

But then you saw them stop in front of the bench on the other side of you.

You looked up to find them both smiling warmly down at you. You gulped, thinking the worst.

“You have potions next right, Y/N?” Remus asked kindly.

He did know your name…

And he knew your timetable…

“Yes?” You asked, cautiously.

“You want to walk over with us? We’re heading there now.” Remus asked.

You were a little gobsmacked that they were asking you to do something with them.

No one has asked you to do anything in a very long time, even something as simple as being asked to walk to class with them. So this was a huge deal to you.

“Really? I mean, sorry, I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

“Intrude?” Sirius laughed, “Never. C’mon.” He kindly smiled and you nervously got up from the table.

You picked up your robe and wand.

“Are you sure?” You asked to make sure a second time.

“Y/N, if you don’t hurry up then Sirius is probably going to pick you up and carry you there himself and then I’m going to have to deal with him moaning about crippling back ache later on… Oh my God… That want be implying anything about your weight… Um… Should I just stop?” Remus rambled and looked to Sirius for help.

“You really should.”

And you smiled.

Genuinely smiled, for what felt like the first time in a long time.

•-•-•-•-•-•

The hallways were starting to become busy.

People moving from morning time to lesson time, especially the first years with their overpacked bags and reckless running through the corridors to get to their lessons on time.

One darted past you, causing you to wobble. Luckily Remus was behind you and he put his hand on the lower part of your back to balance you carefully.

“Thank you.” You said, whilst trying really hard not to blush.

You failed to notice Remus blushing too as you turned back around. You definitely didn’t fail to notice the way Remus kept his hand on your lower back, helping you weave through the halls.

With two of the most popular guys in school, you didn’t realise how easy it was to actually manoeuvre through the corridors.

You’d spent too much time being infatuated with the time that Remus and Sirius were giving you, though, that you’d forgotten your potions book.

You stopped short, feeling the boys bump into the back of you abruptly.

“Bloody… Are you alright Y/N?” Sirius asked.

“I’ve forgotten my potions book. I’ll catch up with you, I just need to run to get it.” You turned to say to them, feeling slightly small underneath both their pretty eyes looking at you.

“Here, just take mine.” Sirius offered.

“No.” Remus swatted his hands, “Another “forgotten” book and you are going to get detention.”

“Oh screw that.” Sirius rolled his eyes.

“Y/N, take mine instead.” Remus insisted.

“What?” This time Sirius hit Remus’ hands away, “And mess with your perfect record? I don’t think so. Y/N…”

“Hey, listen.” You chuckled at the sight of them arguing… over you. It felt like the most surreal situation. “I’m just going to get my book, okay? Then none of us will be in trouble. I’ll see you in a few minutes.”

You smiled at them in thanks, before darting around and away from them.

After you’r turned the corner, Remus hit Sirius over the head with his textbook.

“Ow! What the…” Sirius rubbed the back of his head.

“Really? You were about to give yourself a detention?” Remus chuckled, knowing exactly that was what Sirius was about to do and why.

“For Y/N? Absolutely.” Sirius smirked.

Remus shook his head and kissed Sirius’ cheek in admiration, before taking his hand and leading him off to potions.

•-•-•-•-•-•

As you rooted through your belongings in your dorm, you hummed to yourself with content.

You felt ten times lighter than you ever had felt before and all because the two pretty boys you’ve been admiring for so long had looked right back at you. They’d even gone as far as walk with you to potions.

Sirius was willing to get a detention for you and Remus was willing to break his golden reputation. That was flattery of their highest form.

You finally found your book, before pivoting to leave your dorm.

Only to find Darcy standing there with a cat in her arms, looking malicious as ever.

“O-oh Darcy. Hello.” You said, losing your hum and your smile with one look at her.

“Cut the pleasantries. You made us look like fools at breakfast in front of Sirius and Remus, you foul witch.” Darcy spat at you.

“I’m sorry, I never meant for that to happen.”

You felt yourself caving in on yourself, becoming that shelter of a shy person that these horrible people made you.

“And you think an apology will make it all better?”

“I don’t know.” You lowered your head.

“Well it doesn’t.” She moved towards you and you gulped in fear of her. She’d pulled at your hair and enchanted curses on you before, so you were terrified of what she might do now. Especially when it was just you two here.

“I’m sorry.” You looked up at her, hating that she could probably see the fear in your eyes.

“Show us up like that again and you’ll leave with more than just a scratch.”

“A scratch?” You asked, but maybe you shouldn’t have.

Before you knew what was happening Darcy’s cat attacked your face, clawing at your cheek with one powerful hit. The cat screamed what sounded like a war cry and you screamed in pain.

Your head turned to the side, leaving the cat’s claws to drag slightly down your cheek before letting go. You didn’t reveal your face again until you heard the door slam shut.

It only took a minute for you to delicately touch your cheek and see the blood for the pain to come flying in. You cried as you sat on your bed, cupping your cheek from dripping blood everywhere with one hand and the other hand resting on your forehead as you came to terms with what just happened.

You’d just been attacked for trying to apologise for something you hadn’t been in control of.

Your tears ran down your cheek and stung as they ran into the cuts on your cheek.

Walking to the little mirror hanging up on the wall, you looked in to see yourself. There were three lines scraped down your once bare cheek, running from just under your eye to resting on your jawline.

You cried some more, completely getting lost in the self loathing, before rushing around the dorm to find some healing lotion and tissues.

It took you ten minutes to clean up the mess on your face, and another five for the bleeding to calm down. It was an angry red mess, but you had to get to potions before the class ended.

You breathed out through your mouth a shaky breath, dabbing under your eyes with the sleeve of your jumper to wipe away the tears.

“You’re okay.” You said to yourself in the mirror. “You’re okay.”

You found that talking moved the cuts on your face and they stung even worse. So no talking it was. Brilliant.

“You’re okay.” You reminded yourself one last time.

But your words felt far from convincing.

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