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#wow i'm talking a lot bye
skeleton-headass · 9 months
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guess who's back, back again?
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diospyros-kaki · 1 year
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aah wow one piece chapter 1066 really dropping the bombs huh
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kuiinncedes · 2 years
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me last night just to let everyone else on board know: i submitted the flyer for printing :)
director today: so have we submitted the flyer for printing
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yandere-avatar · 10 months
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I'm Not Jealous... Well, Maybe a Little
Summary: How do they act when jealous? [Damn, 3 posts in one day? Wow. Popped this out in like 20 mins.] Characters: Katara, Sokka, Aang, Suki, Azula and Zuko
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Katara
She doesn't take jealousy well
She'll pretend she's not jealous and bury these feelings
But they'll end up bubbling inside her and it'll come up in a fit of rage
When your back is turned, she'll attack the person that was flirting with you
You'll be none the wiser to what she did
She'll smile at you and you'll probably be confused
The person won't even see Katara coming or even know what she did
She watches in fury though, while the person hits on you
It definitely irritates her more that you don't realize they're flirting with you
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Sokka
He's like his sister, by burying his feelings deep inside
He'll probably know his feelings are bad, but he loves you and it feels so right
He might challenge them to a fight, just out of nowhere
You'll be confused, but the person won't take Sokka seriously
Sokka would make an absolute fool of himself, as long as it meant he had your attention back
He needs your confirmation that you still love him
He'd take your pity over your distaste any day
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Aang
He's the most passive about his jealousy
He's very extroverted and will join the conversation, turning the vibe off [at least hopefully]
If they don't, he will get a little angry
He'll control the conversation and the flirter can't do anything about it, because Aang is so likeable
He makes sure the hint is thrown out there, that they need to leave you alone
If they don't? Well, let's just say their house blew down, so now they don't have time to hit on you
You'll feel bad, but Aang will come up with an excuse on why you and the gang need to leave
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Suki
Ugh, she gets so huffy
She is very forward though and will enter the conversation
If the person tries to push her out, she will get aggressive
She's very straightforward and will confront them, even if you're there
You think they're just being friendly and the flirter will use that to their advantage
"You're just being paranoid, I was just telling them about the town"
Suki will glare, knowing it's bull, but she quickly realized she was cornered
She awkwardly smiled and turn towards you, "The gang needs our help, we should go now"
You won't think about it much and wave goodbye to the flirter
As you both walk away, Suki will turn around, smirking while waving bye to the person
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Azula
Oh, you screwed up bad
When she gets jealous, she gets violent [Though she gets violent a lot]
But, she doesn't know how to healthily express her emotions, or really just express them at all, so she acts out
She hates this feeling because she's used to be confident and adored
She hates when you even waste a second of your time on someone that isn't her
She deserves all your attention, why are you wasting a second on them?
She's mad at them for talking to you, but she's also mad at you for encouraging them
You'll have to calm her down, or she's killing everyone
Her fits of rage cause a lot of casualties
She then blames you for everyone that got hurt
"Well, if you hadn't been flirting with them, this never would of happened"
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Zuko
Him and sister have anger in common
He wants to burn them into the ground
Make them suffer for making him watch
He's very annoyed, but doesn't know how to express his jealousy
He won't act out like a child, but he was glare and fire emits from his fist
Anyone can tell he's angry
He'll walk up to you both and glare at the person, before wrapping an arm around you and forcing a smile
"What are you guys talking about?"
You weren't really into the conversation, so you'll say nothing, but Zuko takes it as you not wanting him to know
Did you hate him? Wait, were you talking about him? Why won't you tell him?
God the anxiety eats him alive
He then begins regretting approaching you both. But you just grab him, before pretending to hear your name and pull Zuko along, saying something like "I think I heard Sokka call us. Let's go"
He'll apologize, but you'll laugh, and lightly punch his shoulder, "I didn't want to talk to them. They were so cocky. I'm so glad you saved me. My hero"
You kiss his cheek and he blushes a dark red and you'll continue to walk as he freezes
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samandcolby-ownme · 3 months
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Summary: anon request - "hear me out ok .. ok what if reader was getting a tattoo and JAKE is the person who does the tattoos??????"
Warnings: TW needles, getting tattooed, male tattooing female reader, mentions of being in pain and smoking, mainly fluff
Word Count: 5.5K | kind of edited
╔═══━━━─── • ───━━━═══╗
"Hello?"
"Hey y/n, it's Corey from Emblem One."
You smile, "oh hey. What's up, Corey?" You sit up and listen to him, " So, Vienna isn't going to be in today, she's got a bad, and I mean bad case of the flu."
You pout slightly, "Oh. Thats too bad. I hope she feels better soon."
"Yeah, me too. I just got done rescheduling her appointments today.. she was booked and busy so it's.. been a day so far." He laughs slightly, "But I know you trust the rest of us, and I was going down over our other appointments and Jake has an earlier opening if you want it."
"Is he the one you were talking about bringing in a few weeks ago?"
"Yeah, that's him. He does pretty sick work, if I do say so myself, but you know that if I didn't think he could do your tattoos, I wouldn't recommend him." Corey chuckles slightly, "I know it's a sternum tattoo, so if you're no-"
"Put me in." You say quickly, "I need tattoo therapy Corey. I can't wait any longer." You laugh and he clicks his tongue, "You got it."
He pauses for a second, "So instead of coming in at six like you were supposed to with V, he can get you in at two thirty. That sound okay?"
"That's absolutely perfect. Thank you so much for calling me."
"Anytime. See you in a little."
"Yep, bye." You hang up, checking the time before getting up to go shower.
You were getting a chest piece done, a floral setting under your boobs with a vine that goes in between them.
You were actually kind of nervous for this one, well.. it wouldn't be as bad if you hadn't let google and all of its pain scale ratings deter your feelings about it.
You tried not to think about it by going to the shops page, looking to see if they posted an introduction to Jake.
They did, and wow is he ever pretty.
You bite your lip, reading down over the basic info that's listed below his picture.
Emblem One would like to introduce our newest artist, Jake Webber. Jake has been tattooing for a few years and he is absolutely incredible. You can swipe to see a few of the pieces that he's done so far, and if you would like to schedule an appointment with Jake, please call the shop and we'll get you set up.
You raise your eyebrows as you swipe through the attached pictures, "Wow." You shake your head, Corey was right, his work is pretty sick.
You find yourself in the comments, and to no surprise, you're reading stuff that definitely should have stayed in the keyboard.
User1: I have no tattoos, but now I want one that will take hours
User2: I have a few openings that I can definitely schedule you in to fill.
User3: I'd leave a wet spot on the table, he's so hot
"People have no chill." You roll your eyes, laughing slightly as you double tap the picture to like it before getting in the shower.
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
You push the door to the tattoo shop open, walking in as you give Corey a smile, "Hey."
He stands up, "What's up, y/n?"
You shake your head, closing the door behind you, "Nothing really, about to get a tattoo." You laugh slightly and he chuckles, "You don't say."
He slides the paper for you to sign, "Are you nervous?"
You sign your name and shrug, "I know it's going to hurt, but I'm so excited for it."
He chuckles and nods, "Yeah, I don't really think it's going to tickle." He nods to the back, "I'll go tell Jake you're here."
He walks back, leaving you alone in the small lobby that you're very familiar with. You walk over, looking at the different paintings and drawings that are on the walls.
You've seen them a bunch of times but they always amaze you.
"Y/n."
You turn, seeing Jake standing there and your eyes move up to meet his - wow, he's a lot taller in person.
You smile, "Yes, hi." You walk over to him, "You must be Jake."
He extends his hand out, "That would be me."
You lay your hand in his and it feels like fireworks are going off inside of your stomach.
"So if you're ready.." he nods towards the door, hand still holding yours, "You can follow me this way."
You nod, blinking a few times as you smile, "Yes. I am more than ready." You slip your hand from his and he gives you a little smirk before walking back the hall.
You follow him back, saying hi to the other artists that are there today.
"You're popular here aren't you?" Jake jokes and you laugh, "I've known Corey since, middle school, I think."
"So you're friends with the owner, how sick is that?" Jake sits down on his stool and you nod, "It has its perks."
You sit your bag down on the extra chair in the corner and shrug your jacket off. You turn around letting out a quiet, but loud enough to catch Jake's attention, "shit."
"Everything okay?" Jake looks up from getting everything set up and you nod, "Yeah, well. I mean no. I wanted to bring an extra shirt with me, just so I didn't get ink all over this one, and I forgot it."
"I have an extra one if you want it." Jake offers and you raise your brows, "Do you really?"
He nods, getting up from his stool, "It's in my car, but I can go out and grab it quick."
"Are you sure?" You tilt your head, "I don't want to be a hassle. I know you have other appointments later."
He shakes his head, "Nah, just one. But that isn't until six or something, so we have plenty of time." He grabs his keys and points to the door, "I'll be right back."
"Thank you!" You say as he walks out. You turn, digging your phone from your bag and bringing it up to text your best friend, I got rescheduled so I'm here at the shop now. Corey put me with the new guy they hired and oh my gosh is he a sweetheart, and oh, he is sooo pretty, too. Go to Emblem One on IG and look. It's their new artist. Jake.
Just as you get done, basically fan girling about Jake, he walks back in, "Here you are."
You take the shirt from his hand and smile, "You are a lifesaver, Jake. Thank you."
He bats the air, "Oh shucks." He laughs slightly and walks towards the door, "I'm going to let you get comfortable, I'll be back in a few."
You watch as he leaves, closing the door behind him.
You take off your shirt off, followed by your bra before slipping on his shirt. Your eyes scan over the black walls, moving over the long mirror hung horizontally against it.
You walk over to the mirror, spending the last few minutes alone trying to figure out how you were going to keep yourself covered while he tattoos.
As you're moving the shirt around, there's a knock on the door and you quickly pull it down, "Come in."
The door opens and Jake walks in, "Comfy cozy?"
You laugh slightly, moving to sit back on the table, "As much as I can get."
"Is there anything else I can do for you before we get started?" He sits down, turning to look at you with a smile.
You tilt your head, "It's more or less how I'm going to stay covered up, I don't want anyone uncomfortable. I seen other shops have hospital gowns that they have people put on backwards.."
He smirks slightly, "I was actually thinking about that out there and, I don't have a hospital gown, but what I can do, is cut the shirt up the middle and then tape it down so you're covered."
"I don't want you ruining your shirt, Jake." You shake your head slightly and he shrugs, "That's an old shirt anyway. I won't miss it."
"Are you sure?" You ask and he smiles as he grabs the scissors, "So. Are we doing this?"
You laugh, moving to stand up, "I guess we are."
He rolls over, pinching the hem of the shirt with his fingers before gliding the scissors upward. You lay your hands on your boobs to keep them covered and your breath hitches quietly as the cool air hits your skin.
"Let me grab the tape."
You nod as you watch him wheel over, grabbing the white tape before coming back over. He look up at you, "If you feel uncomfortable at anytime and need or want me to stop, please tell me."
"You're fine, Jake." You smile.
That wasn't a lie, you were, oddly enough, more comfortable with him than you were with any of your actual guy friends.
"I'm just saying. I don't want you writing a bad yelp review." He tries not to laugh but fails which causes you to laugh, "Oh yeah, I'm going to totally go home after this and write the worst review ever."
"Maybe that'll make the girls in the instagram comments stay away." He snickers as he shakes his head while taping down the shirt to your skin.
"You saw them?" You drop your hands and he look up with a nod, "Oh yeah." He rolls his eyes and sighs, "But I seen you liked it, so thanks for that."
You can feel your cheeks heating as he pushes himself back, "Oh, that. Yeah, i was just.. showing love to my favorite tattoo shop, you know."
Way to play it cool, y/n, you mentally slap yourself as you sit down on the table again.
He chuckles, "No I appreciate that. I know being a new artist to some is kind of scary, but Corey said he would hype me up and it obviously worked, since you're sitting on my table."
You laugh, "he did. Don't worry. He said your art was sick and I have to agree with him. You do some good work, Jake."
He smiles as he holds up a fresh, unopened needle, "Steril, clean." He brings it down to open it up, "Thank you. I appreciate getting that confirmed." He chuckles as he puts everything together.
You make small talk while he gets the stencil ready, asking where you're both from, what you do for work, this and that.
"alright, if you would come stand in front of me." He points with his pinky to the floor in front of him. You walk over to him and he rubs soap onto your skin before shaving the spot the stencil is going to be.
You look in the mirror, watching Jake as he works to get you ready.
"I'm actually nervous about this. I heard this spot hurt."
He smirks, "everyone is different, you know pain tolerance and all, but considering you have a few others, I think you'll be fine. If you need to take a break or two, or five.." he laughs slightly, "Just let me know."
You nod, "Sounds good."
He applies a thin layer of the stencil solution to your skin before turning around to pick up the thin layer of paper, "Alright. Nice and straight and stay as still as you can for me."
You let your hands hang by your sides as you try to control your breathing. You glance in the mirror, watching as Jake smooths out the stencil over your sternum and under your boobs.
"I think, this is going to be a sick ass tattoo." Jake leans back, letting the stencil sit for a few seconds before gently peeling it off, "take a look at that, let me know if you need it moved or anything."
He watches as you turn to look at the stencil in the mirror. You nod, "That's good. I like where it's at."
He nods, "Then we'll let that dry for a few minutes then I guess we'll get right into it." He smiles as he turns away to pour the ink into the little cups.
"I know your post said you've been tattooing for a while, but I'm nosey, so how long is a while exactly?" You sit back down, making sure to keep your body as straight as you can.
He laughs slightly, "Well, if you must know." He glances at you with a smirk, "I was an apprentice for about two years then I worked with an artist in the city for a little bit until I got a call from Corey."
"Did Corey find you on Instagram?" You reach up to run your hand through your hair and Jake laughs, "No, actually. My friend Sam got him in touch with me."
You blink, "Wait. Sam.. what's his last name?"
"Golbach."
"Shut up."
"I'm confused." Jake laughs and you shake your head, "No, no. I know Sam."
"Really? No fuckin' way." Jake's mouth drops open, "How do you know Sam?"
"My family knows his family. Ever since we were little." You shake your head, "That's crazy. Maybe it is a small world after all."
"Yeah, yeah." He smiles, "It sure is."
You smile and after a few seconds of silence, he points, "I'm going to check your stencil if that's okay."
"Oh no." You push your chest out, "Go ahead."
He walks up, gently rubbing his finger over the end part and nods, "Ready?"
You take a deep breath, "I guess so." You laugh as you swing your legs up, lying back on the table. Jake sits down, wheeling himself and the cart over.
You hear the buzzing of the tattoo gun and you take a deep breath. Jake applies a thin layer of Vaseline over the stencil, "Alright. If you need a break at all, let me know."
"Alright." You nod, taking in a deep breath before he anchors your skin down to start.
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
Halfway through the tattoo, you opted for a break.
Jake takes your hand, helping you sit up. You swing your legs over the edge of the table, "Thank you."
He nods, taking off his gloves before shrugging off his jean jacket, revealing a t-shirt with the sleeves cut off.
"I like your tattoos." You smile as your eyes move over his tatted skin. He smiles, "Thanks. I'm kind of an addict when it comes to them."
"Tattoos are hot, so it's okay." You smirk at him as you get up to look into the mirror. He walks up behind you, "Yeah, they really are." His eyes move from your half finished tattoo to your eyes and his lips form into a smirk before he turns away.
"Do you care if I go out and have a smoke real quick?"
You shake your head, "Nope. You're good." You smile at him, "Take your time."
"So sweet." He smiles and pulls the pack from his jacket pocket, "I don't know if you smoke, but I'd feel like it would be rude of me not to offer you one."
You laugh and shake your head, "I only smoke when I'm drinking, or drunk, I should say."
"Nothing wrong with a drink and smoke." He smiles and puts a cigarette between his lips, "I'll be back."
You nod, bending down to get your phone out so you can snap a picture of your tattoo progress. You laugh when you read over the text from your friend, oh my god. He is absolutely beautiful. You're letting him see your tits? Lucky day for both of you lol
You roll your eyes, taking a picture of your current state, He gave me his shirt and cut it so he could keep me covered. He's honestly very respectful, but we're halfway done. I'll send you a picture when it's all done.
You walk back over and toss your phone in your bag before going back to sit on the table. As you sit and wait for Jake, you can't help but think about how you feel like you've known Jake for years.
You clicked with him, so fast that it was actually kind of scary.
"I brought you a water." Jake says as he rounds the corner into the room. You look up, smiling as you take it, "Thank you so much."
You open it, taking a sip before lifting your legs to rest them on the table, "How was your smoke?"
He nods, "It was alright." He laughs as he grabs new gloves, "Don't worry, I washed my hands when I came in."
"No worries, I trust you." You smile, watching as he pulls the black gloves over his hands.
He had nice hands. Very. Nice hands.
"Are you ready to start again?" Jake snaps you out of your stare and you smile, "Yes. Yes I am." You lay back on the table as look over at Jake, "So is this your first sternum piece?"
He looks up at you, "Mm, not really. I did a touch up on one other, but her boyfriend stared me down the whole time."
"Oh I bet that was awkward." You stare up at the ceiling, "I hate that. I hate people in general."
Jake chuckles before he starts tattooing, "I totally get what you mean."
"Oh, I don't hate you. I hope you didn't ta-"
He cuts you off, "Not at all. Not at all." He smiles as he continues, "Don't take this the wrong way, but you have beautiful skin."
You bite down on your lip, smiling as you feel your cheeks turning red, "Thank you? I think."
He leans back, wiping your skin, "I meant that as a compliment, sorry if it didn't sound like one."
"No, no. It did. I just.. never got that compliment before."
"Really?" He shakes his head, "People are missing out to see you smile, then." He glances up at you, and you can tell that he's just as comfortable with you as you are with him.
You didn't really believe in love at first site stuff, but you did believe in that click, and that click is what you have with him.
"Alright, now this part might hurt a lot more than the bottom piece, so if you need another break, just tell me."
You give him a nod, biting down on your lip as he starts the vine that's between your boobs.
"Oh.. gosh.." you take calming breathes as he was right, it does hurt, "you were right."
You close your eyes, trying to think of something else and Jake helps with that.
"Have you lived here long?"
"Kind of." You say instantly, "I've been here a few years. I actually only live a few streets over in the Green Ridge apartment building."
"Nice, nice." Jake wipes away and gives you a little breather, "Do you have any pets?"
"I have a cat." You laugh slightly, "I would love a dog, but my building doesn't have the grass around it for them to go out, you know."
"Oh man. Of course not. What's your cat's name?"
You laugh slightly, "Um. It's mystic. He's a fluffy grey cat and I got the name from The Vampire Diaries." You wince slightly as you feel the needle piercing your skin, "I'll show you a picture when we're done."
"I would love to see it." He smiles as he moves onto the next part, "I don't have any pets. Mainly because I spend most of my time in the shop, whether it's drawings or tattooing, I just like being here."
"Did you draw that moon phase picture above the mirror?" Your eyes move to the frame and back to him, "Yeah I did." He looks up at you with a smile, "it wasn't easy, took me forever but I finally finished it."
"Do you.. think you can draw me a flower piece that connects to the top of this one?"
He nods, "I'd be honored."
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
Two hours of talking and tattooing later, Jake is up by your shoulder, leaning over you to finish the top of your tattoo, "We are almost done, sweetheart."
The cute little pet name makes your stomach flip and your cheeks turn pink, "Okay." You say quietly with a smile, "I'm so excited to see it."
"I may be biased, since I'm the one who's doing it, but it's so pretty." He nods, "I like it."
"I'm sure I will too."
"If you don't like it, you can tell me. I promise I'll wait to cry until you leave." He laughs and turns to get more ink.
"I don't think you'll need to cry. From what I already saw, I'm in love with it already." You smile at him and he nods, "I'm glad."
His arm lays over your shoulder, resting under your chin. You close your eyes, feeling the vibrations move through his arm and before you know it.
You're done.
Jake leans back, "Well.." he wipes off your skin, "we're done."
"Already?" You smirk, "That didn't even take long."
He laughs as he helps you sit up, your hand in his and his other on the center of your back, "Take a look."
You glance down before sliding off the table. You walk over to the mirror and your jaw drops, "Oh my god."
"Go easy on me, I'm sensitive." He holds his hands up and laughs.
"No, Jake. This is .. this is beautiful." You turn back to look at it more, "By far my favorite tattoo."
"I'm glad you love it. I love it too." He sprays a paper towel and sits down, "I'm just going to wipe it off some more then take a picture if you don't mind?"
You turn to face him, "I don't mind." You smile as you step towards him, feeling that relief as he wipes over the completed tattoo. (A/n: if you ever had a tattoo, you know exactly what I'm talking about.)
He rests his hand on your hip as his eyes move over the tattoo, wiping it in different spots, "Beautiful."
You look down at him and he smirks, "That tattoo looks pretty good, too." He winks before turning to grab his phone.
Okay, so there's something there. You weren’t imagining it.
You take a deep breath, licking your lips as you turn to look at it in the mirror again, admiring his work.
"Alright." Jake says, "Ready when you are."
You turn back to him, standing up as straight as possible as he snaps a few pictures.
"Got them. I'll probably post it later if you're okay with that?" He looks up at you and you nod, "Whatever you want to do. I'm covered."
"I definitely wouldn't post them if you weren't." He chuckles and points, "Do you want me to take that tape off or did you want to do it at home?"
"You can take it off and I'll just wrap the shirt over and we can slap a new piece on if that'll work?" You motion to pulling the shirt over and he nods, "oh yeah, that will totally work. Do you want me to cover it?"
"Oh yes. Please." You nod and he gives you a thumbs up before turning around to grab some Saniderm. He holds up the piece, "I think that'll be good for the bottom, I'll cut a skinnier piece for the vine part."
You nod, letting him do whatever he needs to do.
He runs his hands over the clear covering and then moves to take the tape off, "If you wanted to grab this side, I'll go ahead and work at getting these pieces off."
"Okay." You hold the side against you as he peels each piece of tape off on the other side before you hold that side of the shirt against you.
You pull the shirt over, holding it there until he grabs a new piece, "Thank you again, for the shirt, for cutting your shirt, and for doing all of this."
"It's not a problem at all, y/n." He smiles as he rubs the piece of tape to stick to the fabric, "Thank you for allowing me to do this."
"Corey said you were good, I just wanted to see how good." You smile and step back. He smiles, "Well I appreciate your curiosity getting the best of you."
"Of course." You nod and go over to grab your jacket, slipping it on before grabbing your bag, "Do you want me to meet you out front then?"
He nods, "Yeah that'll be good."
"Okay." You walk out to the front and Corey looks up, "Well, I see you're alive. How was it?"
"Painful. But.. worth it." You laugh and rest your bag on the counter, "You have a good artist back there."
He tilts his head, "Good as in he does good work, or good as in you like him?" He smirks and you shrug, "Is it okay to say both?"
He chuckles and rolls his eyes, "I guess." His eyes move behind you as Jake walks out. He moves behind you and around to stand next to Corey.
You hand him the money the amount for the tattoo and he squints his eyes, "How much did you and Vienna agree on?"
"Three fifty." You say and Jake laughs, "I'll take two."
You sigh, "then I'm leaving you a big tip."
He chuckles and Corey looks between the two of you, "I have to go.. check on something.. I think." He laughs as he walks away, leaving you and Jake at the desk.
"I'm not leaving until you take it." You rest it down on the counter and Jake sighs, "You're persistent."
"I like to show my appreciation." You smirk and he picks up the cash, "Fine." He smirks and sets it down on the desk, "Are we looking at scheduling another?"
"Is that even a question?" You laugh and Jake sighs, "Yeah, a dumb question." He laughs and looks at his schedule, "When did you want to come back in? For the shoulder connecting piece, right?"
You nod, "Um, we can do like two, three weeks? That should give you enough time to draw it up for me."
"Okay." He bends down, clicking on the computer, "Does the twenty first sound good?"
"That's perfect." You smile and watch as he writes down the date on an appointment card. He hands it to you and right when he's about to say something else, the door opens and you both look over.
A guy walks in, smiling at both of you.
"Hey Matt, I'll be right with you." Jake nods to him and looks back at you. You sigh, "Thanks again, Jake. I really appreciate it."
"Anytime."
And with that, you leave the shop, mentally beating yourself up that you didn't ask him out.
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
A few days later
The last few days have been painful and irritating as you can't really sleep comfortably yet.
So it's two am, you're wide awake, and your phone goes off.
Who could that be, you think as you sit up, leaning over to grab it.
Hey, y/n. It's Jake. I'm so sorry that it's so late but I cannot stop thinking about you.
Your mouth drops slightly as you feel an excited rush roll over your body. You smile, biting your lip as your thumbs quickly tap the screen, Hi Jake. I'm glad to see that we both feel the same way.
You clutch your phone, anxiously awaiting his response.
Okay, wow. This is embarrassing. I honestly didn't expect you to be awake, but then again I'm glad you are. I wanted to ask you out at the shop the other day but I was so fucking nervous.
You giggle slightly, happy that you finally got the message you were waiting for, or waiting for the courage to send.
You tap the screen biting down on your lip as you send the message, You're literally taking the words right out of my mouth. I was so nervous, too.
You see the bubbles pop up, disappear, and then pop up again before he finally sends his message, This might be a long shot, but what are you doing right now?
You look at your screen confused but you answer, I can't sleep so I'm just lying in bed wide awake.
He answers, almost instantly, Do you want to take a drive?
You answer instantly, Yes, please.
You send him your address and he responds, I'll be there in twenty, I'll text you when I'm there.
You kick the blankets off, hurrying over to grab a pair of sweats and a sweatshirt from your closet. You brush your hair, not worrying about anything else before you walk out to your living room to wait.
You were kind of nervous, but at the same time, you were so excited to see him.
Twenty minutes later, your phone lights up and it's a text from Jake, I'm parked out front in the Tesla.
You grab your bag, making sure you have your keys before walking out of the door. You walk down, smiling at his car as you walk towards it.
He smiles at you through the windshield, leaning across the consol to open the door for you.
"Thank you." You say as you get in and shut the door. You turn towards him as you buckle, giving him a quiet, "Hey."
"Hey." He smiles and looks away, "god why am I so nervous?" He laughs and looks back at you. You shrug, "I asked myself that, too. A few times on the way out here."
He smile and shakes his head, "I figured we could stop, get some snacks before we drive around?"
You nod, "That's good with me."
"Okay." He nods and starts driving, "So. I have to ask. Are the lines on your tattoo straight?"
"I think so." You look at him, "Why do you ask?"
"Because.." he laughs, "I had to force myself to not shake."
You laugh slightly, "Aw, Why were you shaking?" He looks over at you, "I started shaking the minute you turned around to look at me in the lobby."
"Well you did a good job at covering it up because I couldn't even tell you were." You smirk and he sighs, "Well that's a relief." He looks over at you, "Tattoo healing okay?"
You nod, "Oh yeah. I took the stuff off two days ago I think?" You look over at him, "Do you want to see it?"
"If you're okay with that." He nods, "I'd love to."
He pulls into the parking lot and you unbuckle, bunching up your sweatshirt to reveal the underboob part of the tattoo, "I love it."
He raises his eyebrows, "That looks so good."
You nod, "It's healing perfectly."
He smiles as he points to the building, "Shall we go get some car ride snacks?"
You nod, "Let's do it."
You get out, walking in with him. You stay close to him, mainly because you're just happy to be with him. You grab some snacks and a drink, making your way up and Jake takes you stuff from your arms to pay.
"You don't have to do that." You say and he looks back at you, "You got out of bed at two in the morning for me, it's the least I could do."
You roll your eyes with a smile and wait for him to grab the bag before you walk out. You get back in the car and Jake looks over at you, staring for a few seconds.
"What?" You ask shyly, "Is there something on my face?" You brush your face and Jake laughs, "No." he sighs, "You are just.. amazing."
He laughs nervously and you smile as you look down, "So are you."
He turns towards you , word vomit spilling out, "I definitely would have asked you out the day you were at the shop, but I didn't want to do it with Matt standing and.. and then I thought that I could wait until your next appointment with me, but I couldn't so I got your number from your client profile and I just.. had to see you sooner."
"I'm glad you did. I was beating myself up over not saying anything." You sigh, "Plus. You're worth getting out of bed at two in the morning for."
He smiles and shakes his head, "That.. is sweet. Thank you."
You laugh, "I'm just glad we feel the same."
"You had me when you first looked at me, but you really got me at I hate everyone." He laughs, "I'm just glad that it wasn't all in my head."
You shake your head, "Nope. It's not."
.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.
As usual, let me know how you liked this. Thank you for reading! Love you all!
Likes and reblogs are greatly appreciated 🖤
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bigfatbreak · 5 months
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I see a lot of people talking about what Chloé and Kim did, and I think I'm missing something? What did they do?
In a more recent episode "Derision," (sloppy sum up below)
its discovered that the reason Marinette is so stunted, awkward, and generally staccato about dating Adrien in spite of genuinely liking him, is because she was a major victim of Chloe's the year prior. During that year, Chloe threatened anyone who would attempt to befriend her, isolating Marinette completely, only having a friend in a girl named Socqueline who would relentlessly defend her.
At the time, Marinette had a crush on Kim, and so Chloe, knowing Kim loves pranks, had him "prank" her at the pool as a fake confession. As Kim offered a fake, heartfelt confession in return for Marinette's own, he gifted Marinette a box full of spiders, causing her to flip out and fall into the pool from the high end. Sabine and Chloe were filming the whole thing, and planned on posting it on social media to openly mock her. The only thing stopping them is Socqueline, who legitimately kicks the phone out of Chloe's hands.
This leads into why Marinette is so bad at confessions. After a year of being harassed, bullied, and isolated, she takes a chance on love, and is only horrifically and publicly mocked. Her attitude towards Adrien makes more sense with this context - deeply and passionately loving him, but constantly hesitating on the last step, as last time was so devastating. She's got some severe trauma around confessing and connecting with love interests, as she assumes they're always going to mock her in the end.
I really wish this episode had been planned earlier in the series, because it DOES give good insight as to how bad Marinette had it, and would've been great context for the audience. Not long after, Socqueline had to move away, too, so Marinette had to rebuild her entire social network from the ground up, with several people in the class who didn't mind humiliating her for their own amusement.
Also I really liked Chat Noir/Adrien going sicko mode on Kim. PLEASE kill that boy Adrien. I am BEGGING YOU. He tries to cataclysm Kim in the fucking face. I was thrilled. I thrive off negativity
Using this as groundwork in the dad villain au, having all that shit happen to Marinette alongside losing Sabine essentially made her go "wow I am going to quit school and work at my dad's business. bye" which is super ironic because that is ALL gabriel wants adrien to do lmao
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sunflower-lilac42 · 6 months
Text
✧ 𝐅𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 | nico hischier ♔
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summary: y/n is a famous singer and on a couple of interviews, her love for the swiss hockey man comes out. or, two times y/n talked about nico hischier in an interview/on a talk show and one time he talked about her.
warnings: um, gross foods and a tiny mention of gagging.
notes: i wanted to do a third interview but i didn't want to write it really so if you want to imagine it it's the james corden carpool karaoke with niall horan and when they do a lie detector test, james and niall ask about nico. also I'm sorry, i think this is mainly dialogue and i tried to make it so it wasn't but it's an interview so that's kind of hard. pretend the niall video came out in the past year. definitely not proofread because it's two in the morning and i am delierious and have no energy to go back and edit so don't make fun of me, thanks bye! :) also let me know if you want a part two of when they actually meet or get together. part two is out!
publish date: 10/30/23
part two (his girl ) | nhl masterlist | main masterlist
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Jimmy Fallon - Mad Libs Theater ➺ reference video here!
“Welcome back, I’m hanging out with y/n y/l/n! Her new album is streaming every, apple music, Spotify, you name it. Uh, y/n I want to do something fun with you and act out a dramatic scene, but first, we have to fill in the blanks. It is time for Mad Lib Theater.”
The intro of Mad Lib Theater plays and y/n readjusts herself on the seat to look at Jimmy, “Alright. So here’s how this works. I’m going to ask you for some silly words - nouns, verbs, adjectives, et cetera - and they’ll all be written onto our cue cards here, as we’re doing this. And then we’re gonna act out a dramatic Mad Libs scene. Are you ready for this?”
“Thank god I went to fourth grade.”
Jimmy laughs along with the audience and uncaps the marker, “Okay. Here we go. I want a noun that starts with a C.”
“Candle.”
“Candle’s good. Adjective.”
“Sweaty.”
“Type of bug.”
“Mosquito.”
“Animal.”
“Elephant.”
“A chain restaurant.”
“Chipotle. I used to work there.”
“Chipotle?”
“Yeah.”
Jimmy continues, “Noun.”
“Jersey.”
“Like New Jersey or a sports Jersey?”
“Oh, uh New Jersey.”
“A kitchen appliance.”
“Spatula.”
“A plural noun.”
“Buildings.”
“Sophisticated.”
“I know right.”
“Another animal.”
“A yack.”
“One of the Seven Dwarfs.”
“Dopey.” She looks into the audience and winks.
“Celebrity name.”
“Taylor Swift. I love Taylor!”
“Name me a number,”
“13.”
“Just 13, 13-”
“1386.”
“Type of profession.”
“Hockey player.”
“Hockey player? Okay.”
“Wow! Speed round. Here we go. Another plural noun.”
“Mooses?”
“Uh, okay. Body part. Watch it.”
“Elbow.”
“Phrase that you would say if you bumped into Leonardo DiCaprio on the street.”
The audience starts yelling, lots of fans of y/n knowing how much she loves this movie as it takes her no time to come up with an answer, “Why did you let go, Jack? You should have stayed on the door. You should’ve got on the door.”
“Why did you let go, Jack? There was room for you on the door.” Y/n repeats herself for the man as he writes down her answer. 
“Another noun.” Y/n’s flustered, “You do this one.”
“Burrito.”
“Burrito, okay.”
“Type of drink.”
“Bloody Mary.”
“Another celebrity.”
“Elizabeth Olsen.”
“Verb ending in i-n-g.”
“Slaying.”
Jimmy busts out laughing, “Slaying. This is fun doing Mad Libs with you.”
“What you’d shout if you sat down in a wet seat.”
“Fudge that’s wet.”
“‘Fudge that’s wet?’ I love you.”
“First concert you ever attended.”
“Madonna.”
“Wow. Madonna. You know what, that makes sense.”
“A professional athlete.”
Without any hesitation, y/n blurts out, “Nico Hischier.”
“What?”
Y/n hides her increasingly growing red cheeks, “He’s my favorite hockey player. He’s the captain of the New Jersey Devils.”
There were some hockey or Devils fans in the crowd and they let out a couple of cheers. Jimmy wiggles his eyebrows at the girl before continuing, “Another verb ending in I-N-G.”
“Blushing.”
“Yes, very good. You’re blushing right now.”
Y/n laughs, “Two words that rhyme.”
“Swiss. Kiss.”
“A long, silly word.”
“Iridocyclitis!” A man shouts from the audience.
“What?!
“Is that a disease? Is that an actual-” 
“Yeah, what is that?” 
Jimmy attempts to spell out a word. 
“Iridocyclitis. Yeah, of course. Alright, now, we’ve filled out the words for our scene. Good look to our cue card. So sorry, Roman. Are you ready to perform our scene?”
“I don’t know now.”
“Let’s go let’s do this.” 
༶•┈┈⛧┈♛
Jimmy and y/n stand on the building after coming out in superhero costumes, “Am I green?”
“No, yeah, you’re green. Yeah, you’re green. I’m red.”
“Candle girl! What are you doing here?!”
“Oh, hello, Captain Sweaty.”
“Please call me by my nickname, Mr. Mosquito.”
“I’m here for the same reason you are here - to rescue the elephant stuck on the roof of this Chipotle.”
“I knew there was trouble tonight when I saw my signal in the sky- a light projected in the shape of… New Jersey.”
“Well, using our powers this rescue should be simple. I’m faster than a speeding spatula, and everything I touch turns to buildings.” Y/n says before Jimmy responds, “I have the agility of a yak. And when I get really dopey, I turn into Taylor Swift.”
Y/n starts laughing, unable to control herself, “Wow. I must tell you, my back story is complicated. When I was 1386 years old, I was… I was once bitten by a hockey player.” 
She then spits out more laughter and doubles over to hold her stomach, “Oh my- Oh my god. And ever since, I’ve been able to emanate mooses from my elbow.”
“Why did you let go, Jack?” Jimmy holds his hand out before y/n places her own on his shoulder, “I know. It’s amazing, but with great power comes great burrito.” Both of the two laugh beofre controlling themselves and continuing the scene. 
“Your story reminds me of my own. I became a superhero after I fell into a tub of radioactive bloody Mary. But listen. We must complete this rescue. In the trapped elephant’s collar, there’s a USB drive that contains images of Elizabeth Olsen slaying.”
Y/n snorts and covers her mouth quickly before laughing, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I thought it’d be much worse.”
“And as a warning, I do have one weakness.”
“What is it?”
“Madonna.”
“That’s okay. Just remember what Professor Nico Hischier told us. He said if we’re ever in a situation like this,” Jimmy pulls out a gold button, “You press this button, and we will both immediately start blushing. Here we go.”
Y/n laughs and the two start slapping their cheeks for them to redden, “Our blushing is causing the elephant to be saved.”
She looks at Jimmy and then the cue cards and shakes her head, “Swiss kiss! We did it!”
“Yes, let’s high-five and say the secret superhero catchphrase on ‘three’. One, two, three.”
They both squint in an attempt to read the word, “Iri-dira-calaptus.”
“Dude!”
“Yeah!”
“And scene!”
The two laugh as the scene ends and Jimmy tries to get his words out, “My thanks to y/n y/l/n.”
✧༺✎༻∞
James Corden - Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts ➺ reference video here!
The theme music plays as the camera cuts to James, Ewan, Niall, and y/n sitting at a table with a rotating top and a bunch of food laid on it.
“Okay. so let’s take a look at the food that we have here.” James proceeds to spin the top of the table to showcase the food, “We have a salmon smoothie. A beef tongue.”
Ewan sticks his tongue out and makes a noise causing y/n to laugh as she holds her napkin up to her face, “This is disgusting.”
“Bird saliva.” The audience yells in disgust and Niall makes a whiffing motion with his hands, “The smell just gets stronger and stronger.”
“A scorpion. Fish head. Hot sauce. “
“Is that safe to do hot sauce?” Ewan asks as he looks towards James, “We’re gonna find out.”
“And finally, bull penis.”
“Yay!” Y/n claps. 
“So here’s how this works. Ewan and I will be asking questions to Niall and y/n. Now if someone on your team chooses not to answer their question, you both will have to eat the disgusting food. Have we got it?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay, Niall-” y/n cuts in quickly, “I’m already mad.”
“You’re up first. Niall, I am going to giv eyou-”
Niall points, “Please don’t do that. My acid reflex will freak out.”
“Please don’t. Not the scorpion.”
“The salmon smoothie.” Y/n squels. 
“Here is your question, So if you answer the question you don’t have to eat, if you don’t answer the qeustion, you both have to have a big glug of the salmon smoothie.” Niall laughs, “I don’t know what I’m more nervous about, the question or the smoothie.”
“Well, I’ve just seen the question and I think it might be the question. Niall, who is your least favorite member or One Direction?”
Niall swears but the bleep covers it as he goes to clink smoothies with y/n. Y/n looks at him, “I think you should drink, I am not your publicist, but I don’t know that you should.”
“I think I might and just take the daily mail hit tomorrow, and throw out a crap answer. I’m trying to help y/n.” The said girl laughs and hits him, “If it’ll help you out, I’ll drink it.”
“Don’t think of your teammate, think of your life.” 
“What do you think, Nial are you going to go salmon-”
Y/n places the napkin around Niall’s neck to make a bib, “Yeah for future life, yeah, I think I will go with this.” The two pick up smoothies and drink them, well attempt to drink them. 
James hands them spoons and they both put it in their mouths. Y/n immediately gags and goes to spit it in the trash, getting some in her hair. James and Ewan immediately burst into laughter as they watch the two. 
Ewan looks at y/n, “Are you alright?”
“It is not so of the taste, it’s the texture. It;s like having salmon yogurt.” James looks at y/n, “Oh and there is some in the hair to keep for later. Right, so now y/n, you will ask your question to me.”
“Oh well, well, well.”
“Which would you like me and Ewan to have?”
“Have a look at the question first.” Niall leans over to help y/n, it was honestly like having a brother and sister team up agains someone. 
“Oh, wow. Getting tactical.”
“Oh, he is going to eat. I know– Scorpion.” Y/n turns the table so the scorpion sits in the front of the two men on the other side. 
“Scorpion. I think that is the easiest one.”
“Well, yeah, you say that until it is in your face.”
“Your question is, James, name one artist who you have turned down for carpool karaoke.” The crowd lets out a bunch of oos, “How long have you got?”
“Cheers mate,” James cheers with Ewan and the eat the scropion, seemingly without any problem. 
“What is y/n going to eat?”
“I think I’m going for the tongue.” 
“And it’s one each. You have to eat the whole tongue.” Y/n looks at him disbelief and he just shakes his head, “I’m just kidding.”
“Oh this is quite a cute one. Y/n you once said you had a favorite hockey player, Nico Hischier, is it true you might have a crush on the Swiss man?”
Y/n immediately blushes and places her head in her hands as everyone laughs, “Oh come on, this is an easy one.”
“Oh shit.” The bleep censors the word as y/n looks at the tongue, “Yes, it’s true. I do have a crush on Nico Hischier.”
The whole crowd goes wild and Niall playfully hits her on the arm, “Niall what would you like to give Ewan?”
“Ewan you’re up. Truthfully, all I’ve been thinking about is that saliva. Surely the question gets better.”
“It does. Sorry, boys.”
“Jeez, again, back to the bird saliva.”
Y/n looks at the boys, “How do they get it?” James and Ewan playfully try to mimic on what they think happens.
Niall pulls out the card and y/n reads it, immediately bursting into laughter, “This is the greatest question ever.”
The Irish man looks up at Ewan with a grin on his face, “Ewan, have you ever shit your pants?”
Everyone laughs uncontroloblly for at least 30 seconds, “The show is only an hour, Ewan.”
“I mean I could lie, there is only one or two people that would know.”
“I am really enjoying this.”
“Well, I guess, yeah.”
“Hand on, wait how old were you?”
“Well, I was very young at the time.”
“No, no there didn’t have any age in there, did it.” Ewan defends.
“Well, we’ve all technicaly shit our pants as babies.” Y/n looks at the man. 
“That is all I was referring to. I might have shit my pants in the 90s one time.”
“Ewan McGregor. Spilling it.”
“Okay, Niall I am going to give you guys.”
“Please not the hot sauce.”
“Some beef tongue, are you ready. Okay.”
“I’m going to have to eat this, aren’t I?”
“Niall, you have dated both Selena Gomex adn Ellie Goulding. It is your last night on Earth, who would you rather spend it with?”
“Just it doesn’t hurt anyone.” Y/n says, “Y/n’s going ‘it doesn’t hurt anyone’.”
Niall places his arm on the girl’s chair, “I’m afraid it does, love.”
“The trouble is, is that it’s not relaly your last night so someone’s gonna be upset tomorrow.”
“Okay, I would, cause it’s the last night on Eart, Ellie is a big fan of planet Earth by David Attenborough so I would sit and watch that with her and for that reason, Ellie Goulding.”
“Y/n it is your turn, you now will ask me a question and select a food.”
“You know what, you guys seem so keen on the beef tongue, giving it to us time and time again, so we will get revenge. James, you are definetly going to eat that, so have you got your knife and for ready.”
“Yup.”
“Which Late Night Host do you prefer, Kimmel or Fallon?”
“That’s tricky. Oh, dear are we eating this?” The two bite into the tongue and y/n gags as she watches them. 
“That was Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts. Big thanks to Y/n Y/l/n, Niall Horan, and Ewan McGregor, we’ll be right back, everybody!”
✧༺✎༻∞
Nico Hischier on Y/n Y/l/n on a random post-game interview
“So Nico, I hate to ask you about this but there’s been these videos floatinga round about y/n y/l/n talking about you, have you heard about this?”
Nico nods his head as he looks at the interviewer, “Yeah, actually I have. Jack actually showed me this video and let me tell you, that was the last thing I was expecting.”
“Everyone is dying to know after she came out and explicitly stated that she liked you, do you like her, or at least have a tiny crush on her?”
“Yeah, well you know, I haven’t actually met her so I can’t say I like her but I do think she’s cute and that’s all I’m going to say about this.”
The interviewer nods, “Thanks, Nico.”
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naivegh0ul · 7 months
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Could you possibly do a soap platonic fic where ghost has a 9 year old daughter and she is the total opposite of ghost, she just rambles and she meets soap at base and they instantly become infatuated with each other and ghost finds them talking about sharks in immense detail to each other???
Oh my gosh that is such a cute idea! 🥹🥹🥹
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Soap had no idea Ghost had a daughter. I mean, why would he, of all people, have a kid? Ghost is a lone wolf, "I work alone," may as well be his catchphrase at this point.
So, one night when the squad goes out for drinks, Ghost having been forced to come, Soap is curious as Ghost gets a call. Soap was surprised Ghost even had a phone, he just imagined he brought a radio everywhere with him, like the strict soldier he is.
Soap watched as Ghost stepped away from the bartop, murmuring a low, "Hey, sweetheart." into his phone. He assumed that maybe Ghost had a girl back home, but when Soap listened in further, he was shocked.
"I know, I know. Daddy will be home soon, alright? Behave for the babysitter. Alright, I love you too, sweetheart. Bye."
Wow, was all Soap could think. No way The Ghost has a child. Impossible, simply impossible. But, the way Ghost spoke to whoever was on the other line...
Soap had to investigate this.
For the next few weeks, Soap kept a close eye on Ghost, trying to listen in on his phone calls, peering around him when he was texting someone.
It was a little creepy, yeah, but Soap needed to know whether or not Ghost actually has a little mini-me or not.
Ghost seemed a little off one day, constantly on his phone, being mean to the recruits, (Well, meaner than usual.) It got Soap curious again. Ghost left the base around 2pm, and Soap watched with raised eyebrows.
To his knowledge, Ghost hadn't been called out on a mission, and he had left the base wearing civilian clothes, this all got the wheels turning in Soap's brain.
Ghost came back around 4pm, and Soap immediately went to greet him. Then, he saw it. Actually, he saw her. A little girl, huddled behind Ghost's back, clutching onto his jacket with a shark plushie in her small hand.
The little girl looked up at Soap with wide eyes, a twinkle of curiosity visible. "Hey, lass, I'm Soap. What's your name?" Soap said. The girl glanced up at Ghost as if to see if it was okay to talk to the strange man, and Ghost nodded down at her.
"Beth." She answered, smiling a little up at Soap. "Do you like sharks?" Beth pointed at Soap's mohawk, clearly thinking that it looked like a shark fin.
Ghost chuckled under breath, and Soap nodded. "I do. Does this little fella have a name?" Soap crouched down in front of Beth and gestured to the shark plushie she was holding.
"Sharkie!" Beth exclaimed with a happy smile. She seemed excited to be talking about her plushie. Beth toddled over to Soap and held up the toy, showing it to him while telling him facts about sharks.
Soap looked over at Ghost, smiling to himself as he saw the proud look in Ghost's eyes as he stared down at his little girl. Ghost stepped closer to the two and placed a hand on Beth's head before kneeling down.
"Daddy's gotta go finish some work, alright? I'll be back as soon as I can, you stay with Soap." Ghost said, stroking his daughter's hair lovingly. He lent down and pressed a kiss to the top of her head through his mask before walking away.
Soap felt his heart swell with happiness at the thought of Ghost trusting him enough to let him look after his daughter. "Alright, you little menace, what do you say we go get some ice cream?" Soap smiled as the little girl squealed in excitement and nodded, grabbing Soap's hand.
The entire car ride to the ice cream parlour, Beth was chattering away in the backseat, telling Soap all about sharks. "Did you know that baby sharks are called pups? Like little dogs! Isn't that cool?"
Soap pulled into the parking lot and helped Beth out, walking into the shop with her on his hip. "Mr. Soap, can I have chocolate ice cream?" Beth asked. She tugged on Soap's sleeve, looking at him hopefully.
"Of course you can, lass." Soap smiled, ruffling Beth's mousy brown hair. Soap ordered the two of them some ice cream, getting strawberry for himself and chocolate for Beth.
Beth kept talking the whole time, excitedly telling Soap about sharks, and about that one time when Ghost took her to an aquarium and she got to see a shark in person.
"It was so cool! It was kinda big and scary, but I know my Daddy could fight it off." Beth giggled at the story, beaming as she praised her father.
It was cute, to watch this little girl who is somehow Ghost's daughter despite being the complete opposite of him, ramble about sharks. "Do you work with my Daddy, Mr. Soap?" Beth asked curiously as she nibbled on her chocolate ice cream, smearing some around her lips.
"Yeah, I do. He's my friend, as well." Soap took a bite of his own ice cream, looking over at Beth as she scooped up some of her ice cream and pretending to feed it to her shark plushie, staining the shark's face a little.
Soap checked his watch after a while, his eyes widening as he realised they'd been gone for quite a while. "Let's go back, yeah? I bet Ghost- your dad is missing you." Soap said, catching himself when he referred to Ghost by his callsign, unsure if Beth knew about that.
The girl seemed oblivious and nodded her head, wiping her mouth on her sleeve before she hopped off her chair, shark plushie in hand.
The two headed back to base and Soap took Beth to the 141's common room, putting on some random kids show on the old TV for Beth to watch.
Soap sat back, watching as Beth sat cross legged on the floor and looked up at the TV, watching eagerly as Octonauts played. Beth seemed to be really enjoying the show, giggling loudly, it made Soap smile.
Beth continued to tell Soap about shark facts, pulling one off the top of her head each time a shark would show up on screen. She is actually quite smart, she knows more about sharks than any adult Soap knows.
Neither of them noticed when Ghost entered the room, Soap being too engrossed in the facts Beth is telling him. Ghost watched from the doorway, smiling under his mask as his little girl taught Soap about sharks.
(ok but why is this over 1k words. i think i've become obsessed with parent!ghost and little beth 🥹)
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lady-eris · 9 months
Note
Hi! I was wondering if you could make a Dbz android17, Goku, Vegeta, Gohan and trunks with a reader who’s exactly like misturi from demon slayer ( I’m not sure if I wrote it correctly)
my idiot self almost deleted the ask XD i was so excited to write this I almost deleted it, i didn't know if you meant personality, or stength and eating or anything else, but i basically decided to do it where the reader has there looks, but the personality and the abilities of Mitsuri
Tw/Notes?: slight description of fighting, profanities, mostly They/them pronouns, Trunks one is feminine hinted
Android 17
His foot was placed on a rock, watching as the poachers down below. They always seemed to bother him. "Again? surely the beating from last time would make them realise" He rolled his eyes, before hearing a voice. It seemed like a shout? His eyes narrowed as he scanned the men below, nothing. His audio picked up a sound from above and quickly looked up.
"Kya!" the voice shouted, jumping from the air and then posing as they landed on the ground. He almost sweat dropped, until he saw the men one bye one drop like fly's. Now just who are they? thought Android 17 it wasn't everyday you saw an average human defeat a bunch of poacher's with what seemed to be ribbon sword.
"you bitch!" one of the poachers wore as they raised their guns, before firing at them. But before the bullet could hit Android 17 quickly deflected it, and knocked the poacher out at the same time. it was child play.
"are you alright?/Will you be my boyfriend?" Android 17 paused, looking up at the taller person. They were strange, but a good strange.
Vegeta
He tsked as he looked up. He had been in a battle, and had almost had his head ripped from his spine. Almost, Just before the attack he felt arms curl around him, as the person carrying him jumped in the air. He opened his eyes, ready to shout at them feeling his pride damaged, only to quickly close them again. a bare chest/exposed. The person holding them had there chest/breast exposed. was the person holding him some harlot?!
But before he could say anything, they began to do an head twirling amount of somersaults and twists as they tried to avoid the attacks. Before landing on the ground. The dirt underneath them coming undone as they did this.
He was speechless (his ego being broken) as he was placed gently on the ground. "Don't worry! I can defeat him!" Vegeta watched them going back to fighting. were they royalty? surely they must of they were as beautiful as a god/goddess, and it seemed like they were trained by the highest of warriors.
he had been too distracted, and had only now come in to terms that they had just beaten the villain. That was HIS fight.
"woman! who are you?! and how dare you steal my fight!" Vegeta shouted, pushing himself up.
Son Goku
Goku sat on the chair (that was quite uncomfortable) as he stuffed his face with food, ordering more and more. The other people looked over in amazement. How could he eat so much? surely it should be impossible to eat that much without being sick, right? WRONG! for Goku was not like them!
"Wow! you eat a lot just like me!" An overly enthusiastic voice stated. "huh?" Goku asked, as he saw someone other then a server come over to talk to him. "can i sit down please?" Goku swallowed the rest of his food before nodding. "Yeah sure!" he stated, and they sat down with a large grin. He looked them over noticing, that they wore colourful clothing, with decorative design on it.
"OH! these look good! so do these! and these too! I'm (y/n) by the way!" They cheerfully said, calling the waitress over who then took there order.
"My nmaes Swon Gokuw" Goku said, speaking with his mouth full. "You have a lovely name Goku! i have a question for you!" Goku swallowed his food, as he waited for them to continue. "go on"
"Would you like to be my husband?"
Gohan
"can I sit here?" Gohan looked up from his spot, seeing someone with (main hair colour) and (secondary hair colour). "Oh! uh sure! Sorry give me a moment please!" He said, as he removed his bags from the chair besides him. They giggled taking the seat next to him.
"thank you!" they grinned, as they took their pen out. it was a pink colour, which had (Image) designs printed on it. Gohan watched from the corner of his eyes, as they stuck the tongue out from the corner of their lips, making there notes look cute. Everything about her was so cute.
"so what's your name? I'm (y/n)!" They asked, as they turned around placing the pen next to their notebook putting their hand out to shake his. He looked up, grabbing their hand and shaking it.
"I'm Gohan!"
"So Gohan, do you wanna go on a date with me?"
Trunks
Trunks screamed as he fell to the floor, his head looking up as that's all he could do his body was badly damaged, sore and bruised. He could only open one eye, as he watched what the villain was going to do.
"You bully! how could you harm someone as cute as him?" A voice shrieked, as suddenly the villain screamed, his arm being sliced off. Trunk's eyes widened as someone appeared in front of him. They were much taller then him, and had defined muscles. His face quickly blushed.
"Pink and green stripes" He muttered looking down. He had accidentally been flashed by the one in front of him. His face felt hot, but the sound of slashing brought him back into reality. They were in a battle, and he was watching the person in front of him fight better then he ever could.;
"i think I've got my first crush" They muttered, there cheeks blushing.
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TL;DR: the bee movie
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minggukieology · 1 year
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"Jimin and Jungkook's casualness isn't anything out of the ordinary but is still surprising"
'지민 (Jimin) Choreography Practice Sketch' write-up ✍️
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Among Jimin's gruesome practice sessions and strict work ethics leading up to Face promotions, we were given a peak into a few moments out of Jungkook's visit on day 2.
What struck me (and even k-armys) is that they didn't even bother to pretend to be formal in front of the staff and camera + crew, which just goes to show how long gone are their age barriers in communication and behavior. Once again I know we are all well aware of this development between them, however it is still a bit surprising seeing that happen in front of strangers- especially at their workplace and during work, which is a formal setting. The significance of this may appear minimal to you but in Korean culture, the way you talk to someone but also what you discuss and how you phrase it is highly influenced by the age hierarchy. Allowing someone speak to you informally (even in the public or formal settings) means they now have the same rank as you and their word is thus referred to/significant on the same level as yours and they can express things way more directly. In a highly hierarchical culture with a strong respect for authority (or anyone above) this presents a disruption in an embedded way of thought and behavior that is in the minds of all Koreans from the very early age. 반말 (banmal) of course does happen among many people even those who are not 친구 (friends- meaning people born in the same year) but it is not something that is just expected automatically and in any social setting. (I am excluding family ties here)
Thus, what the international audience may see and perceive only reading the translated subs:
"Ah cool, Jungkook came and supported Jimin"
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What the Korean audience (or anyone with just a little knowledge of the language and culture) sees and perceives:
"Oh wow they are speaking informally so naturally to each other, they seem so close"
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JK: "I'll cheer for/ support (you)"
(*said in a form that implies promise to someone for the future, informal tone)
JM: "Come again"
(*said as an informal command or request)
Other fav moments:
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JK: "Noo, do it once (for me)!"
(*주다 on its own means to give, gift someone something; in combination with other verbs like 하다 (to do) it implies doing something for someone; the most accurate but weird way in English to translate would be: "give a doing" Here Jungkook commands/requests Jimin to do the dance for him in an informal tone which sounds veeery casual, especially considering the dancers nearby 🫣)
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JK: "It's awesome/ You're awesome"
(*Again informal tone, the pronouns are not stated therefore both you/it could be inserted)
JK: "Will be cheering (for you), myself"
(Informal tone, said in a form that implies promise to someone for the future + Jungkook added 내가 at the end of the sentence to emphasize he personally will be cheering/supporting Jimin on. Reminder- Korean sentences don't need pronouns, therefore you can tell he used it for added emphasis)
All in all, Jungkook didn't use the formal level a single time besides when he was leaving and told Jimin + everyone else in the room to "take care" (수고하세요).
Finally, to anyone trying to use Jungkook's informal "nope" to Jimin's direct requests to get his ass over there more frequently probably didn't catch just how """seriously""" both of them were taking that convo, as you can see from Jungkook's smirk hidden under the mask ㅋㅋ
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Also just how long were they teasing and saying bye to each other if there is a cut and suddenly Jungkook is standing on the other side, still saying bye and holding hands with Jimin? 😆
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This short edit of Jungkook's appearance tells a lot about their dynamic and reassures everyone that can perceive the tone of their closeness. I'm glad we could see a little bit of it in this video!
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hi new one's! You open for request am I right? If you don't mind I want some Obey me smut for brothers if can't all of them just Lucifer and Satan :>
how will they react when their beloved MC is angry at them for some reason and refuses to have sex for a whole month ( wow cruel) when the MC is not angry anymore and the brothers become Brutal during their Bed activity -////- specific kink ? I'm ok with Breeding and Spanking
I hope this isn't too much to ask, Feel free to ignore if it makes you uncomfortable :> sorry for my horny feeling
Sorry for the  delay.
Please don't feel ashamed for doing such a beautiful request and ooh God this is gonna be a long ride, I think, a fun one, I hope.
You didn't specify the gender so I'm going with an non-binary approach.
Minors GET OUT
Please warn me if you see anything that triggers you.
Lucifer 
He forgot about your monthly dinner date, cause he was extremely stressed about shit his brothers had done throughout the day and he had a big and extraordinarily boring meeting with diavolo, that he also forgot to mention to you. And honestly, you would forgive him if it wasn't the third month without those dinner dates.
He would try to talk to you, try to reason, even ask for forgiveness, something extraordinarily rare because of his pride, look how much despair you create, just because you are denying him, but when the month is over, ooooooh you better run.
I think it would go like this:
The desperation of getting out of this overwhelming pleasure, as you try to wiggle as little as possible, because the ropes would dig even more into your skin. Tied up on Lucifer's ceiling, for who knows how long, with a bullet vibrator in you, he left the room right after he was done tying you up, and giving you a good old spanking, It felt like you were there for days. Then finally the door opens again, maybe he will forgive you, maybe he will use you to make up for the lost time, it doesn't matter, the only thing that matters now is that he is here.
And boy oh boy, he is gonna make you pay, consensualy of course, you revoked his funny business privileges, he is gonna revoke your walking privileges for at least a week.
Mammon
He gambled a present you gave him in horse racing. When you found out he almost lost it, for the second time, oh well Mammon, say bye bye to mc, you not only don't slam his slammer, but you also don't talk to him, and when he noticed he started to annoy the fuck out of you.
How this goes down depends on you, if you talk to him again,  before the month is over, he will annoy you less, still learn his lesson and be a little happier and will go easier on you, but if not… Skedaddle skadoodle your legs are a now noodle.
I believe that Mammon, when domming, is a soft dom, but that doesn't mean that he can't be a little rough sometimes.
"Come on, pretty thing, can't you deal with what you've done?" He looks at you while you suck on his pretty cock, as he gives a light smack on your ass. "There we go love such a good human, the best living being in the three realms." He says as he makes you go deeper.
Levi
He got a little jealous when one of the brothers was out with you doing things, let's say idiotic things, especially since you were out with mammon, probably helping him out of a pyramid scheme.
It doesn't really matter, Levi is lonely, and got so fucking jealous, he almost broke his favorite ultra rare Ruri-chan action figure. After the fit he had inside his room, he went after you and mammon,
Annoy the fuck out of you 2.0
"You're such a little brat, trying to tease this whole month, ignoring me, and in the end YOU end up crying hard and I didn't even started… that's adorable." He coos in a condescending voice.
He would whine, a lot, like really, he will go OUTSIDE just to annoy the fuck out of you and try to convince you. Yes he does relieves himself by masturbating, cause if he didn't you would be trying to kill him.
(I belive it is one of the times where admiral Leviathan comes out)
Satan
I think he would actually be really comprehensive and calm about the whole thing, he understands he fucked up, he may be the avatar of wrath and because of that he would be the best with his feelings and the others… BUT you should have been warned what would happen after the conflict had been solved. After you calm down and his privileges are back, you won't walk soon darling. He will go all out, and I mean it.
"Come on kitty, it's been a month, now it's time for us to catch up for the lost time."
You were in his favorite lingerie, a black lacy one with an opening right in the ass for easy access, a set that he chose during the month you decided to deny him, a really pretty tail plug, that matches perfectly your hair color, along with the cat ears and the adorable little collar in your favorite color. At that moment you knew it was gonna be a long night.
Asmo
Basically he would pass through the 5 stages of grief.
Now you wanna know how did he fuck up?
It was late at night and he went in too your room and you made go out, it would be fine if it wasn't for being the day before an important thing you had (think about, idk, a test?), you told him you could go tomorrow, but he told you it was something he could not delay, it was a sale on his favorite beauty products… yeah.
During the month he will try to make you give in to him, let him pleasure you and him at the same time, he will also tease the fuck out of you and try to invade your room to relive some of this pent up energy, but thanks to Lucifer's magic, he can't.
After the month is over be prepared to be edged,fucked dumb and over stimulated, it will take a while for him to get all this frustration out, you make a note to try this again cause even so the month was hard for both of you the wait was worth it, he learned his lesson and you enjoyed yourself way too much.
Beel
Tbh I don't se him fucking up something really big, unless it involves food… like he ate a present that you made for someone else. I think the conflict happened when you made some angel cakes for Luke, cause you both were exchanging typical foods from the sender's realm. You left the kitchen with your almost ready sweets, but it was missing a small detail, the edible sparkly blue confetti, you left it in your room and went to get it, but you forgot one small detail, you left the angel cakes unguarded, with just a small note for luke. Beel saw them and ate them all, forgetting about what you told him and ignoring the letter that had Luke written in capital letters.
Understandable have a good day.
That was him before he had met you, he would be fine, but after the first time you had done the deed, what was small had grown into a monster.
So you can expect some over stimulation, lots of oral and even some breeding (if he is feeling like it)
Belphie
You were horny, he denied you, you denied him for a month, well that's not the complete story, even though there is some, consensual, sonophilia here and there and shit, almost everyday either of you wakes up and have some sex. Well one day he decided to deny you, just for fun, and tease you all day long, talking dirty with his sleepy voice in the middle of the class. When you arrived at home he just eddge you and did not let you come once, all the while he gave you that lazy smirk.
Well that's when you decided to tease him for way longer and you managed to keep that up for a month, he didn't seemed bothered by it, until he just burst into your room pinning you to the bed. 
"You actually think you can go around like that, teasing me for this long and nothing would happen to you?" He growls at you.
If you want more or an actual fic,please tell me <3
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the-disemvoweler · 1 month
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coward.
According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry.
Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary.
Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman.
What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees.
We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out.
Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! -
I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing.
You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer?
No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman?
Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die!
You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check.
Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic.
That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him?
I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans.
I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure!
There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say?
I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess.
"Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church.
The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it?
You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me?
Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? -
Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s!
One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee?
How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything?
All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane!
You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here?
For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier?
I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no!
A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours.
Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead.
Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey?
That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt.
No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"?
Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee?
Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit.
This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding.
All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson?
Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you.
No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005.
Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left.
I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that?
Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them!
Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends?
Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection!
I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain?
Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over?
Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence?
Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps,?
Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal.
Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody?
Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me?
This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry?
Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got.
Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. -
The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... ...without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job.
Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke?
No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres.
They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep!
Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it!
You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance.
We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number!
:3
Absolutely not
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literally-hottopic · 21 days
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According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming!
Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special
day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distin
guished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked
your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest
advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the
difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly
functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know w
hat it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not
planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too
much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my th
roat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybeyou're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get
bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son'
s not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call
everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your
choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadifie
d. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got
the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey,
guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be
careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!
Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fa
st and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash
over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Sa
y again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad.
Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car
! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the windo
please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.
They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to
them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out i
s also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not suppose
d to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed.
Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very
funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. -
Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought
you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a
doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on t
eir toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was
nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. -
How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You
wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they
eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinkin
g bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't
respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the
roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very
carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is
pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating,
cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard
something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened
here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A
wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny
screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack.
See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring
your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's
going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our
honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still
stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action
news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our stud
io, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in
this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard
'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of
weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you.
Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon
bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This
lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a
honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The
Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the
bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be usin
g laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us
'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own
Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean
like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you
haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated
congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your
lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on ou
r side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your
resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old
stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not
as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are
other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't
overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you
allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real
parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of
destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the
honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You t
hink it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some b
ees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don
't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going
to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work c
amps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You
know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time
, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything
more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack
garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't
believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked
our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's
amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's
notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa?
Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses.
Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought
maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena,
Oalifornia. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I
could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. - The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... ...without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your
shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the
talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please
hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke? - No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not
good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob
Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We h
ave a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big dif
ference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm
not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee,
Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flo
wer. - I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked
! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain.
Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved
. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too?
I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?!
- Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody.
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faerytreealtars · 11 months
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☆•° How does your inner child view Current you? °•☆
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Hello my dears, I felt called to channel some letters from your inner children seeing as I have been working on my own inner child for the past few months, it felt only right to help all of you connect more with yours! So take a breath, clear your mind and pick whatever image speaks to your heart. Remember it is a general reading so only takes whatever resonates. Much love. Fae♡
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♡ Pile One ♡
{Cards: The hierophant, two of pentacles, nine of pentacles, five of pentacles, ace of wands & four of swords}
Dear Pile One,
I, Your inner child see you as someone I could have only dreamed of being, you have power and wisdom now than I could have ever imagined, and the way you balance & control that power is so inspiring! We really came from nothing, hard times, and challenges but now look at us prosper! Far more than little me could have ever dreamed of! so much choice & creativity flows to you and makes me so proud to be you, or at least a part of you! Even if you feel out of your element just remember to slow down & look at how far you (we) have come!
~Lot's of Love, Little You ♡
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♡ Pile Two ♡
{Cards: Five of Pentacles, page of wands, four of pentacles -reversed, The sun -Reversed, the tower and the hanging ones.}
Dear Current me.
I do not know how to start this letter, I do not know if you will even listen or care. I hope you will for I need you more than I have ever done. I do not know how to heal the hurts, only you do. Please don't neglect me anymore - It is so dark, so cold and I feel so confused. I am only little so why must my (our) heart hurt so? What was done to us was unjust but I do not want to linger on it any longer, there is a whole bright light for us. I can see it through the cracks but I am tired so I ask of you please don't hide away, can you be strong for us? I hope you can.
Your Ever-loving, little you ♡
(Note: While channeling your inner child I instantly felt drained of energy and cold, and it's a really hot day today so that tells me your inner child feels very neglected, I don't say this to make you feel bad. It's really easy to get busy and ignore the needs of your energy but seeing as I was near tears while writing your letter I urge you all to slow down and talk to your inner child, they really need you!)
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♡ Pile Three ♡
{Cards: seven of pentacles, eight of pentacles, two of wands, the world, the star & ten of swords}
Dear Pile Three,
Hi!! Letters are kind of stuffy, don't you think? So don't mind if this sounds more like a text message! But oh, wow! I think you're so cool, like we're really the best and I know I'm right! Oh I need to focus I've been told so yeah anyway, we've done so much! succeded in all my dreams and we are unstoppable, I say don't listen to the haters they don't know us, or our story, haven't seen how far we've come, the work we've put in, the swords we've pulled from our back. Keep dreaming new dreams and know I'm your biggest cheerleader (on a side note we would have been great cheerleaders) Fae says we must have run on sugar rushes exclusively but I'm just an energetic kid! Anyway, I've got nothing else to say except Bye!!
(Channeling your inner child energy was like riding a roller-coaster, It's not bad in fact I'm sure you must have been quite the comedian/character in your youth but I do hope your parents/carers are getting some well-needed rest now!!)
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I hope that you managed to find comfort, Inspiration, or a message that resonated with you out of the three piles, If not don't worry I'm sure you will receive a message in some other way. Much Love - Fae˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
TAROT DECK USED: Nicoletta Ceccoli Tarot
MOON POSITION: Full Moon - Strawberry Moon (100%)
DAY OF THE WEEK: Sunday - Sun elemental, today's energy is good for relaxation and spending time enjoying the great outdoors. Rising with the sun will give you energy and it's best to avoid doing anything too active or strenuous on the body. Clear your mind from all worries and focus on mindfulness. Lucky Colours: Gold and Burgundy
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bryce-bucher · 1 year
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Basidia Post #4
Vintage CGI:
Modus Interactive and I have been spending the last week or so learning how to use Alias Power Animator 9 which is essentially an old version of maya. It was used on sgi workstations back in the day on games like ff7 and mario64 for all the pre-rendered stuff. For a long time Modus and I have been pretty invested in learning how to replicate the look of old pre-rendered stuff, and, as it turns out, the best way was just to do it how they did it. For so long I tried to wrap my head around how old cgi stuff was modeled because the sorts of shapes that were often created seemed like they'd be unnecessarily hard to create with polygons. The thing that specifically stumped me for a while was how they handled wrinkles in clothing and organic shapes. As it turns out, the answer was hidden right under my nose the whole time. They weren't using polygons at all! Instead they were modeling with NURBS! It seems very obvious in hindsight, but I feel like I deleted the memory of NURBS once I exited highschool, and nobody ever seems to talk about or use them these days. If you don't know what they are, it's basically a style of modeling that involves making a bunch of bezier curves and using them to define surfaces. It's a totally different style of modeling from polygons with a lot of pros and cons, but it achieves that smooth look we're after extremely well.
Scout Rifle Render:
As shown in the pics above, I decided to make a model of the scout rifle in Basidia so that we could use it for an item icon. The process was definitely a learning experience, and one of the things I learned is that modeling like this is super fun. It's like creating each shape is a puzzle where you need to theorize what is the best approach to take, and following through is always a multi-step process of defining a surface and slicing it up. I find it super satisfying to pull off, and making slapping materials on it is always fun as well. Moving forward we are probably gonna use this program and/or older versions of maya to create any pre-rendered item icons or backgrounds that we'll be needing. Modus actually made new versions of the vials in it as well which I will put right here \/
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Wow there it is would u look at that. Power Animator just has an amazing way of outputting some unique, rich colors that are hard to get in modern software. I mean, just look at that cork. How do you make a cork have such interesting colors? Amazing. Fuck it, I'm gonna show off a little guy I made in power animator that has nothing to do with Basidia. I've been hyperfixating on this program since I downloaded it so I owe this to myself.
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Here he is! Power animator has this amazing glow effect you can put on any shader that adds this bloom as a post processing layer. I used it on the head in this one, and I think it achieves a particular dreamlike effect really well. The sorts of shapes I can get for cloth out of NURBS is also super fun and rewarding, as shown with the cape here. Character modeling is something I'm always really excited about, and I'll definitely be modeling some Basidia characters in this thing.
Conclusion:
I am loving this program and I cannot stop thinking about it. Anyway, I have some commissions to take care of before switching back to midwest lost development, so I may or may not be posting about that game next week. I'm trying to buy an old sgi workstation with the commission money, and, if I can pull that off, then I will have access to all the old software they used back then (including the IRIX version of poweranimator). If you want to check out power animator yourself then here is a link to the program, and here is a helpful tutorial. Oke bye take care!
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