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#wow okay wow damn fuck shit we gonna have such pretty kids wow
loveinhawkins · 1 year
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“Why are you wearing cologne?” Dustin asks after barely one second in the van.
“I’m not,” Eddie says, and promptly wants to die at how unconvincing that was. It’s not even technically a lie…
He makes it out of the school parking lot with Dustin saying jackshit, so for a little while, he thinks he’s gotten away with it.
More fool him.
Dustin abruptly lunges to the side, all up in his face like the world’s most dedicated sniffer dog.
“Ew, gross! Get off, man, I’m gonna crash,” Eddie says, even though they’ve been at a stop light for the past minute.
“Okay, correction,” Dustin says, drawing back. “Why are you wearing Steve’s cologne?”
Eddie stares into the middle distance, prays for The Upside Down to come and swallow him up.
An agonising silence.
“Oh my god,” Dustin whisper-screams. “Oh my god.”
“Look, just—”
“Oh my god!”
And yup, ow, that’s definitely become a full blown scream now, and double ow, Dustin has just socked him one in the arm.
“Hey!”
“What the fuck, Eddie?! How could you not—”
“Jesus! Take a damn chill pill, Henderson, I swear to—”
“Since when you do you say shit like—oh my God, Steve says shit like that. You can’t let him get to you like this, Eddie, you’re too young to die.”
“What does that even mean?”
Dustin keeps jiggling Eddie by the arm as he pulls up to Dustin’s house. Even when his stomach is jangling with nerves, he can’t fight a smile at the kid’s antics.
“Holy shit, this is big,” Dustin says with wide eyes, and it bothers Eddie that he can’t get a hold of what sort of expression is on his face. “This is huge.”
And all of a sudden, it doesn’t seem all that funny anymore.
“It’s not,” Eddie says quietly. “It’s really not. It doesn’t have to be, like… look, Dustin, can we just—if it bothers you, just drop it, and we can pretend like—”
“Wait, what? No.” And now Eddie can read the remorse on his face. “Shit, sorry. Eddie, I didn’t mean, like… big in a bad way, I swear.”
And goddamn it, Eddie trusts him. Of course he does.
“Okay.” He lets out a long sigh, tipping his head back in his seat. “Okay.”
“I just meant… like, you know The Royal Family? In England.”
…What.
“Oh, please, run with this analogy,” Eddie says, a mixture of curious and hysterical, “I’m dying to see where it goes.”
“You know, when they have news, they put it outside the… Palace? Like, on a stand. So people know.”
“Are you fucking implying that you are the public to our… wow, I’m so sorry, Henderson.” Eddie can’t take it anymore; he wheezes with laughter, can’t hide how relieved he sounds. “Next time I’ll ruin your front lawn and put a huge fucking sign there, then you’ll know that—”
“I didn’t mean it literally, asshole. I just…” Dustin shrugs. “Just meant if you wanted to, like… mention it. It would be cool. It is cool.”
“Cool,” Eddie echoes faintly.
“Cool,” Dustin repeats, emphatic.
Jesus Christ, I love you so much.
“Aw, Henderson,” Eddie says, “were you gonna make us a card or something?”
“Do you want a card?” Dustin says dryly.
And yeah, he’s being a little shit about it, but there’s also a note of sincerity hiding in there that has Eddie fighting a lump in his throat. He chuckles through it, flicks Dustin’s forehead.
“C’mon, get out before your mom thinks I’ve kidnapped you.”
“She thinks you’re an angel now, and you know it. It’s horrifying.”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m a Saint.”
Eddie waits until Dustin’s at his front door before reversing, watches him with silent fondness as he greets his cat.
He says through the side window, “Hey, Dustin?”
Dustin turns back. “Yeah?”
“We’d have told you first anyway. We were gonna, I swear.” Eddie scoffs. Smiles. “Not our fault you’re Sherlock Holmes, man.”
Dustin smirks, but his eyes are soft. “It was pretty elementary.”
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wisteria-cherry · 6 months
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forty days and forty nights (day thirty-two!)
the last thing you wanted was to scare off your most recent friend, and by no means did you mean to, but it was painfully obvious what you’d done when katsuki got his coffee to-go.
that night had been horrible. you barely got any sleep because you were just so incredibly anxious that you were tossing and turning all night. you didn’t want to scare katsuki off, but it was just as scary confronting him about it. however, after a very long night of internal struggle/debate, you opted to confront him. after all, it was that, or lose him.
“medium black. t’go.” katsuki grunted as usual when he came in. you nod, your lips sealed tight. you had told yourself you were going to mention it immediately, but, well, it just didn’t feel right.
who were you kidding? you were just chickening out.
“okay.” you rung him up, made his coffee, and set it down on the countertop. he took his coffee and turned to leave and you could already feel the regret washing over you. you’d missed it. you missed your chan-
“katsuki!”
katsuki turned around. you swallowed, immensely relieved but twice as nervous.
“what?”
“can.. can we talk?” you ask breathlessly. katsuki narrowed his eyes.
“…yeah.” he agreed finally. “what?”
“i’m sorry.” you confess, before glancing around. you come out from behind the counter, your hands sweating as much as you’d imagine katsuki’s did. you swallowed a lump in your throat as you approached him. he looked down at you. he really was quite tall. “for all this.”
“you mean your weird-ass behavior.” katsuki ascertained. you nod, looking down at your feet. katsuki was silent for a few moments before he spoke again. you looked up when he did.
“did… did i do somethin’ or some shit?” he grumbled, looking away and scratching the back of his neck.
“what?” you blink, processing for a moment before frantically reassuring him. “oh, no, no! not at all! trust me, it’s not in any way your fault.” technically speaking, it was, because he was the one you were pining over, but you weren’t about to tell him that.
katsuki finally looked back at you. as usual, you could read him like a book— he was trying so hard to maintain his tough-guy attitude, but he clearly felt like he might’ve had a part in your strange behavior.
“i’m happy we’re friends.” you tell him, meeting his eyes. such pretty eyes— carmine red, with the outer ring of his iris a beautiful crimson. “and i’m sorry for acting how i did. i don’t want this to become the norm.”
“yeah, whatever.” katsuki’s lips twitched into the slightest smirk. “fuckin’ dumbass.”
you smile, and your shoulders go limp. you knew him, and you knew that his smirk was the telltale sign that he’d be back tomorrow, sitting in his rightful seat.
“thank you,” you exhale. “katsuki.”
“tch!” katsuki clicked his tongue. “shut up, loser.”
“you shut up.” you manage a breathy laugh amidst intense relief, lightly hitting his chest.
“you’re fuckin’ tiny, y’know that?” katsuki snickered. “tiny fuckin’ hands, didn’t even feel ‘em.” there was only one natural response to a short joke, though, and you executed it perfectly: a swift kick in the shins.
“oi, what the fuck?!” katsuki demanded, jerking his now incapacitated leg back and grabbing his ankle to support it. “the hell was that for, huh?!”
“serves you right.” you stick your tongue out, and katsuki flicked your forehead. “hey!” you laughed, and it was the first time you’d laughed since that period of awkwardness.
“i hate you.” you gasp amidst laughter.
“nah, you love me.”
“so, um…” you trail off to catch your breath. “are… are we good?”
“obviously.” katsuki rolled his eyes. “same as always.”
“but you got your coffee to go yesterday.”
“some chucklefuck scheduled a meeting at 5.” katsuki scowled. “dunno who yet. gonna kill ‘em when i find out.”
“so��� so it wasn’t me?” you gape. wow, how self centered of you.
“like hell, moron.” katsuki flicked your forehead again. “now move it. i have to get to a damn follow-up meeting.”
“the door is behind you, i’m not in the way.” you retort, poking him in the chest in retaliation.
“whatever. go do your damn job.” katsuki snapped, whirling around to head to the door. you smiled to yourself as he walked out.
it was good to be back.
“i’m happy we’re friends.”
(feel free to comment + give ur thoughts :)
tags: @k0z3me @cherryblossomclarity @jazzafayesworld @failingstudents-blog @stevenknightmarc @chuugarettes
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sleepingnova · 2 months
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Resiliency
Pairing: Ray x fem! black! reader
Summary: it's the summer of 1996, and Los Angeles is all the rage. Living life and maybe, you'll have some friends to enjoy the ride of life with.
I have such a brainrot for this movie omg I love this movie, it's so good. I actually wanna get back into writing fr, so send asks guys !!
As always, likes and reblog are appreciated, mwah mwah mwah <3
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Working at the local corner store, it's always some sort of racket outside. Loud chattering every day. Yelling and screaming from the store manager for whoever's outside to get away.
“man come on, we ain't even doing nothing for real! we just chillin’!” someone's voice rings out from outside, followed by the store manager. Rolling your eyes, you walk out, seeing your manager walking away and down the street.
“fuck. shit, what the fuck is his problem?” a curly haired boy rings out, drinking from what looked like a jug of water.
“sorry about him. he's just not used to a bunch of noise everyday. neither am I, to be honest.” your voice rings out, honey sweet and kind.
“damn, you kinda fine. you wanna see sumn?” the same boy rings out, his eyes hooded.
“fuckshit, shut up. damn. you'll have to excuse my friend here.” a black boy politely says, looking you up and down respectfully.
“wow, you are really pretty. I— woah!” a younger boy says, tripping over your skateboard. you act quick, catching him and helping him back up.
“Be careful sunburn. who the hell puts a random skateboard in the middle of the sidewalk anyway, right? I mean, just dumb,” the dark-skinned boy looks at you, a little dazed at your beauty. “ray. I-I’m Ray, nice to meet you.”
You smile, as a car comes up to you, catcalling you, telling you to ‘bring that ass here’.
“Yo, you know that fool?” Ray looks back and forth from you and the car.
“Yeah, he's my ex boyfriend. Won't leave me alone.” You smile at him, the car getting closer, the profanities getting more and more grotesque. “guess I should get going. I'll, uh.. see you around, Ray, right?” You pick up the skateboard, starting to walk as you walk away.
“Yeah. Wait, yo, what's ya name?” Ray yells down the sidewalk as you start to run, hopping on your skateboard in the distance.
“It’s whateva you want it to be, baby!” You yell back, turning the corner to get away from the car that's gaining on you. You run, running until it starts to hurt, seeing your house in sight. Going in your house, you watch at your window for the car to drive past, sighing as it finally does.
Over the next few days, your boyfriend— or well, ex, has been tannin’ your hide. It's up whenever he sees you outside. You've been getting a few hits in, but you're a heavy hitter, so he looks worse than you. Running from your ex again, you run into the skateboard shop, not expecting to see Ray.
“Yo, ain't that the chick from the other day? The one that had Ray all blushin’?” A kid asks, apparently called Ruben, followed by a ‘black people can blush?’ by someone, who they all seem to call “fourth grade”. You and Ray exchange a glance, but even though you're out of breath, you defo have time to pull a ‘is this nigga serious?’ look at him, before putting your hands on your knees, panting, your face flushed from the heat outside.
“Yo, you breathing like you just got fucked, calm down.” Ruben laughs, lighting a cigarette.
“Shut up, Ruben. Hey, you okay? I still ain't got your name from the other day.” Ray jokes, helping you over to the couch.
You wheeze, taking your jacket off, wincing as dark bruises and scars paint against your brown skin.
“Need you to hide me.. please. My ex— he's..he's coming and he's gonna beat my ass.” You pant, Ray nodding, looking at everyone else. Just as he starts to speak, your ex comes busting through the door. Ray and fuckshit block him, taunting him as he stares you down. They eventually get him away and out of the store, leaving you a mess.
“That was dope as hell, not gonna lie. You was all starin’ him down like ‘yeah, nigga I got the juice now. what's up?’ even though you look really bad.” fuckshit comments, Ray looking at you with concern.
“He did all that? Yo, he's a pussy, man, beating on a woman like that,” Ray tilts his head, pointing up and down. “ay, you finna roll with us from now on.”
“You got bitched. Why you ain't fight back?” Ruben laughs, sunburn and fourth grade looking at him with a side eye.
“Shut up, Ruben. You suck, nigga. Real shit, are you okay? Come on, go into the bathroom, you bleeding through your shirt.” Ray helps you up and into the bathroom.
Closing the door, you're pressed against the sink as Ray tries his best to help you.
“Where're you from, again? Remember you said we was too loud. Y'know, cause you aren't used to all the noise where you're from,” Ray asks, his hands around your hips, trying to lift you. “sorry, where are my manners? can I? need you to jump, so you can sit on the sink.” He asks, you mumbling a ‘mhm.’ before lifting you onto the sink, his hand lifting up your shirt to see your whole stomach area covered in blood and sweat.
“m from the east side.” you mumble, blushing from being so close to him.
As he finishes cleaning as best he can and putting a bandage on your stomach, he helps you down with a smile.
After a while, after adopting the name ‘babydoll’ or doll or sweets, or honey, and after fighting with your parents so much about the friends you hang with and finally getting your ex to leave you alone, it brings you to here— waking up in the hospital bed, after apparently being asleep for 3 and a half days from the accident, extremely drowsy as Ray and the others come in your room, Stevie sitting on your bed, facing you.
“Hey, sunny baby, thought you couldn't be out the bed?” you slur, still on all of the painkillers.
“Convinced them to let me out my room.” Stevie shrugs, drinking a carton of orange juice.
“How you feeling?” Ray grabs at your file, looking over all your injuries as you groan, collective gasps and ‘damn’s come out of everyone's mouth.
“Everything hurts. All the bruises n stuff don't help neither.” You groan, not moving.
“One thing's for sure; you're resilient. I like that about you. Get some rest. I'll be here, babydoll,” Ray hugs you, kissing your cheek, followed by all of them snuggling up next to you. “we all will. for real.”
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marichive · 1 year
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𝐓 𝐎 𝐗 𝐈 𝐂 𝐈 𝐓 𝐀
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A compilation of things a muse of mine has said. Ranges from 100% seriousness to absolute chaos (but mostly chaos). Change pronouns / etc. when sending as needed.
tw for drinking/alcohol mentions, suggestive content, violence mentions, lots of swearing / insults, other non-PG shenanigans.
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❝ Get the heart eyes away from me. ❞
❝ I can't help it, I'm just too hot. ❞
❝ Was I supposed to NOT be mean? ❞
❝ I am what the boomers like to call a "delinquent". ❞
❝ Just think before you say anything, "would I say this to [name] for fun", and if the answer is yes, do not say that shit to her. ❞
❝ Aw, did that hurt your little feelings? ❞
❝ Oh dear god, what torture are you going to put me through now? ❞
❝ Words cannot express how much I hate the words that I just read with my own two eyes. ❞
❝ Call me [nickname] again and I'll break your face. ❞
❝ If you turn that into a sex joke I swear to god — ❞
❝ Cursed. Horrible. Disappointing. ❞
❝ Adorable that you think you're worth the effort. ❞
❝ The only kink here is gonna be the one in your fucking spine. ❞
❝ One, I'm not your babe. Two, I will fucking strangle you. ❞
❝ Do you have a death wish or something? ❞
❝ Feel like doing something ridiculous? ❞
❝ I feel like this is what happens before someone walks into an intervention. ❞
❝ My entire support system is having a crisis right now. ❞
❝ I'm just not ready to deal with it right now. ❞
❝ I'm not gonna try to fix things and get myself in another fight as a consequence. ❞
❝ I fucked up and kinda shut down before I could. ❞
❝ I don't know how to make this right. ❞
❝ Maybe he's better off without me. ❞
❝ You went right back to blaming me for everything the first chance you got. ❞
❝ I imagine it's hard for you to feel sorry for anyone at all. ❞
❝ I can't catch a fucking break. ❞
❝ I actually liked the idea that we could maybe be friends and move past everything, but you're always going to think the worst of me. ❞
❝ I guess I did ruin everything, didn't I? ❞
❝ I needed to win to prove to myself that I could do it. ❞
❝ No no, this one is actually a good idea! ❞
❝ See, this is why you're perfect for each other. ❞
❝ Maybe he'll be more receptive to it if you're there. Or at least less hostile about it. ❞
❝ I think you're probably the only person who could get through to him on this. ❞
❝ I've had to do a lot of things I didn't want to do to try to get by. I get what that's like. ❞
❝ You're not a snack, you're a whole damn meal. Don't be humble. ❞
❝ Soooo I might have done something. ❞
❝ He's too much of a petty bitch for that. ❞
❝ I'm going to terrorize him. ❞
❝ Guess I better get the bullying out of my system before then. ❞
❝ Wow, that's like, third base. ❞
❝ Hold my [object] while I kick ass for you. ❞
❝ You're the cutest duck, though. ❞
❝ That's the option with the least violence. ❞
❝ You're probably the only person I trust that much. ❞
❝ Okay that was cute, you can have a kiss for that one. ❞
❝ Um, that's me. I'm the Precious here. ❞
❝ I'm a scam of a person. ❞
❝ Don't worry, I'm sure all her murder energy is focused on [name]. ❞
❝ Want me to make mean faces at them? ❞
❝ There is something and I need you for impulse control. Or you can enable me, that's cool too. ❞
❝ Yeah but like, we're little shits by choice. He's a little shit out of hatred or spite or whatever the fuck fuels him to act like this. ❞
❝ I'm pretty sure my brain stopped working several times. ❞
❝ It's scandalous! I mean we're just SO wholesome and innocent. ❞
❝ People might start to think we're in love or something. ❞
❝ Getting kicked out of [location] sounds fun. ❞
❝ They are looking at me with their EYES. ❞
❝ . . . I've never seen that. ❞
❝ The trauma is half the fun. I'm just melodramatic. ❞
❝ Don't tell me how to breathe, mouth breather. ❞
❝ Why were you listening you fucking creature !? ❞
❝ Dude go to fucking therapy, I'm not even kidding. ❞
❝ I need to bleach my brain. ❞
❝ It was for safety purposes you nasty bastard! ❞
❝ Dishonor on you, gambling satan! ❞
❝ I don't know how you're still alive. ❞
❝ You call me the antichrist and accuse me of being pregnant at least three times per month. He gives me hugs and pizza. ❞
❝ No you're right, I set my expectations too high. ❞
❝ Why did you bet on THIS of all things oh my fucking god??? ❞
❝ Everyone's always like "[name] you have daddy issues" but I have no dad to have issues with so??? ❞
❝ I will beat you to death with your own limbs. ❞
❝ You Gary Busey lookin' bitch. ❞
❝ We have to watch you guys make bedroom eyes at each other all the time, we just want it to stop. ❞
❝ You use my horny behavior against me, it's only fair I get to use yours against you. ❞
❝ I have no sense of self preservation. It's why I get into so many fights. ❞
❝ Glad to know you approve of horrendously spiteful revenge tactics. ❞
❝ I may talk shit but I do worry about you. ❞
❝ Oh, I'm completely vile. I'm well aware. ❞
❝ At least I don't look like I got hit by a school bus because the driver thought you were a threat to the children on board. ❞
❝ Why are you the way that you are? I hate so much about the things you choose to be. ❞
❝ Well maybe you should, I don't know, talk to him about his trauma before you give him sex advice? Seems a bit out of order. ❞
❝ [name], don't touch my baby boy! ❞
❝ Did he drop kick my son !? ❞
❝ You told me you dropped [name/object] down the stairs, I do not trust you. ❞
❝ Say sike right now !! ❞
❝ Is this actually happening?? Am I having an aneurysm???? ❞
❝ I feel like this was a big accomplishment, we came out of this with no attempted murder. So it's a win. ❞
❝ Maybe we DO have the power of god and anime on our side. ❞
❝ I don't know if I trust you two drinking around each other. ❞
❝ I said behave oh my fucking god. ❞
❝ Do it for Voltron! ❞
❝ You like [food/brand/name], you clearly have no taste. ❞
❝ No breaking of the sacred pinky oath! ❞
❝ That was so stupid, but thanks for the attempted save. ❞
❝ I'm gonna hit you in the dick with a car while listening to the Power Rangers theme song, and I'm gonna have so much fun doing it, dickhead. ❞
❝ The rules are reasonable. The problem is that I am unreasonable and I know I will break them. ❞
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missjanjie · 1 year
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100 Prompts #4
im so obsessed with seeing my other hundred prompt list being used so much, seeing what different people do with the same sentences is so cool! so, here’s another one! please send me a number + ship (au/trope where applicable)
“There is something profoundly wrong with you. I like it.” 
“It’s okay to be wrong sometimes.”
“Pretty sure that’s illegal.”
“A candlelit dinner? Okay, what did you do?”
“Don’t fucking start with me.”
“Well, I’m pretty sure I’m not dying, at least.” 
“I chose you. I’ll always choose you.”
“That kid is too cute to be yours.”
“What the hell happened here?”
“It doesn’t have to be like this.”
“I don’t need to be saved.”
“Just shut up and listen.”
“It’s nice to feel wanted for once.”
“I could be perfect for you.” 
“You have to stop working so hard.”
“I’m on the verge of breaking down!” 
“Only you could make me swoon at something so corny.”
“I just wanna sleep.” 
“Can you ever forgive me?”
“Things are gonna get better, I promise.”
“You’re such a lightweight, it’s adorable.”
“This thing has been following me everywhere.”
“That can’t be healthy.”
“Where am I? Why are we naked?” 
“I made this for you.” 
“Oh my god, I’ve been so stupid.”
“That shouldn’t be arousing, and yet…”
“You didn’t really think I’d forget, did you?”
“Please don’t leave.”
“I can’t believe you actually did that.”
“Oh, you’re drunk drunk.”
“I wasn’t staring at your ass! I mean… I was, but I was trying to be subtle.”
“You don’t know me as well as you think you do.”
“At least you’re pretty.”
“When did that happen?”
“You sure know how to keep me on my toes.”
“There’s something I should’ve told you.”
“You’re too good to be in a place like this.”
“I don’t know who I am anymore.”
“That face won’t work on me, babe.” 
“You did all of this for me?” 
“I’m not saying making out would help, but it couldn’t hurt.” 
“You are exhausting sometimes.” 
“You little brat.”
“I want to be there so you don’t have to be brave.”
“What’s in it for me?”
“I am giving you one chance to explain yourself.”
“Wow, I’ve never been anywhere so fancy.”
“C’mon, live a little.”
“I have to go.”
“I can’t look at you, it’s like staring into the sun.”
“Don’t touch me!”
“Pack a bag, let’s get out of here.”
“I don’t belong here.”
“Sorry, I think I’m lost.”
“I’m in love with you.”
“Damn, when did you get hot?”
“I miss what we used to be.”
“You don’t have to say you love me.”
“I didn’t know where else to go.”
“No one's gonna hurt you while I’m around.”
“You’re a mess, come inside.”
“I thought I knew what falling in love felt like before I met you.”
“It’s all coming back to me now.”
“I just… I couldn’t do it.” 
“Listen, I love Britney Spears as much as the next person, but we have to put a curfew on your singing along.” 
“I don’t have anything figured out.” 
“Take a chance on me.” 
“How long have you been there?”
“I think I’m finally ready for love.” 
“Maybe in another life, we would’ve been perfect together.”
“I can’t explain all the things you make me feel.”
“You look familiar.”
“I hate how lonely I’ve become.”
“Come a little closer, baby.” 
“I’ll wait for you, I always do.”
“There is a completely normal explanation for this, I swear.” 
“It’s too early for this shit.” 
“I don’t wanna talk.” 
“You’re the most important thing in my life.” 
“What are you staring at?”
“By the way, you were my first.”
“You knew I loved you.”
“I realized I was trying to make my life into a movie, but the story continues after the happy ending.” 
“So all of this meant nothing to you?” 
“I plead the fifth.”
“You have no idea how badly I need you.” 
“I didn’t think it would get this bad.” 
“Hey. Turn around.” 
“Um, sorry about your friend.”
“Can I make it up to you?”
“This just doesn’t feel right.”
“I just want a fairytale ending after everything I’ve been through.” 
“Take care of yourself.”
“Could you relax for like, five minutes? For once?” 
“I… wow, you look incredible.” 
“Let’s go back to my place.” 
“I’m not high enough for this.” 
“Why do you hate me?” 
“Fuck this, I’m out.”
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Text
Best SAO Abridged Lines As RP Starters Pt.1
"I am going to burn this fucker to the ground."
"I have a feeling you get beat up a lot."
“Fuck you, man, that’s like the pig from Hell!”
“The legacy of the pebble lives on.”
“Well, thanks for the quick tutorial on pig slaying, and the not-so-quick tutorial on... rocks.”
"Come on, I can't alt+F4 this shit!"
“...And the sky is bleeding.”
“Well Ballsy, I believe the locals call it a... hex...a...gon? Not sure if I’m pronouncing that right I’ll have to get back to you.”
"Man, they're really working for that M rating."
"Much like the World of Warcraft, you're not here by choice anymore. Unlike WoW however, you're being held here by me, not by the need to escape your empty fucking life."
"Sometimes things are born. They live... and then they stop. Forever."
"Yeah I'm just gonna keep that tabbed."
"As... tempting as that sounds, I really should stick with my friends back there. They're about as skilled as I am so I figure we have a better chance of surviving if we stick together."
"Well, monkeys and typewriters..."
"You might be the most unbearable asshole I've ever met, but you are really good at this. We could use you in our group, what do you say?"
"So many poor souls came to an abrupt and tragic end... some, by bad luck, others by sheer stupidity. I mean really, why would you just stand in fire?"
"Oh wow, what brilliant insight. That's so deep it loops right back around to being stupid."
"Its all bullshit metaphors with you."
"He cried... not knowing the difference between a simile and a metaphor."
"The tininess of his brain dwarfed only by the tininess of his di--"
"You can silence me but you can't silence the truth!"
"Oh jeez I am just making things worse."
"Pssht. Evidence... I don't need no evidence. Isn't that right _____?"
"Its pronounced ______, and... I don't know you."
"______, huh? That's a... pretty masculine name."
"Shouldn't be. Its a woman's name."
"...'kay, I dunno how to talk to you."
"Good, then you can shut up and listen."
"Good rule of thumb: if someone asks for money two seconds after meeting you, front lines. If they hijack conversations to rant about their political views, front lines. If they ask women to see pics of their boobs, front lines."
"Jesus, who wrote this thing?"
"Okay, so the guide's a bust, but it'll be fine! I'll come up with a great plan for us!"
"Well, we could--.... uhh... I'm open to suggestions!"
"We could group up, and hit it til it dies!"
"Fuck it, group up."
“What, a whole month? How have you survived this long?”
"HOW DO I EAT YOU?"
“It’s been...a challenge.”
"Oh I have lots of reasons for not grouping up. Mostly because they're a bunch of mouth-breathing neck-beards who think L M A O is how french people laugh."
“You sure have a way of... eh... speaking from the heart?”
"Funny, I thought I was speaking from my mouth, but shows what I know about biology."
"No one else wanted you in their group, did they?"
"Shut up, it was mutual!"
"Fine, we leave at the crack of... 2:30... I guess."
"Okay, so... apparently there were a few more stairs than we realized."
"Jesus... why don't you just take a cheetos and mountain dew break and we'll reconvene in an hour."
"Damn it I was kidding! You weren't actually supposed to actually take an hour!"
"Stop attacking from the front! Do you even know what 'Flank' means?!"
"For fuck's sake, stop playing Bejeweled!"
"Alright, this last part's going to take careful coordination... which is why I'm just gonna do it myself!"
"While both are primarily slashing weapons, a Talwar was favored by cavalrymen, as opposed to an Odachi which was mainly used for dick measuring."
"And why couldn't you say that first?"
"I like to think of myself as a teacher."
"Our best player is a girl who thinks DPS is some kind of sex thing."
"I've been doing this a long time, and if there's one thing I learned, its that lions do not concern themselves with the opinions of sheep. Just take that little voice in the back of your head that tells you to be tactful and understanding, and shoot it. Shoot it in the god damn face."
"Here's what we'll do. One counters his blows to knock him off balance, and the other switches in to attack. Rinse, repeat, victory."
"You came up with that but you can't open a menu..."
"Congratulations! That was even more impressive than that cat that learned to play."
"Oh my god, you guys can see it too?! So I'm not crazy!
“Isn't that right _____?"
"That's right ______! Now... kill them all."
"As you command my lord."
"We have traveled far, and up many stairs to get to this point, fighting side by side, noobs and elites alike. I'd like to take a moment to say I couldn't have done it without the help of each and every one of you... of course I'm not a liar, so I'm not gonna say any of that."
"I mean to be honest I could have done this whole thing myself, BUT, to be fair, I guess you DID absorb a bit of damage for me, which was nice."
"You were an adequate meat shield, and no one can ever take that away from you."
"Fuck... fuck! Shut up! Shut up!"
"Shoot for the stars! It'll make it more fun for me when I kick you back into the dirt."
"You're not better than us!"
"My sweet ass coat begs to differ."
"No, its not fabric I can cut, its a bunch of 1's and 0's."
"Fine, then give me the 1's."
"Fuck you I want the 1's."
51 notes · View notes
sheinthatfandom · 1 year
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Prompt: A reluctant trip to the zoo to make their partner happy
Rating: teen
Word count: 4226
Pairing: Dante Martin/Nick Jackson, Eddie Kingston/Nick Jackson
AN: thank you to @sarahcakes613 for letting me play in your Eddie’s brats au
@wrestleprompts
He really needed to get better at telling his brats no. Or at least coming up with a plausible reason to get out of things.
“Oh wow look at the baby giraffe running”
Nicks voice was so soft and awestruck that it brought a reluctant smile to Eddie’s face. His green eyes catching the way Dante and Nick held their pinkies together down underneath the fence to the enclosure.
Okay, maybe the trip to the Zoo wasn’t the worst thing in the world. Nick had been good lately, and the relationship with Dante seemed to really help give the younger Buck the confidence to step out of his more boisterous brother's shadow. It’s positive reinforcement, it’s science. You reward the behavior you want to continue.
“The map says there’s a food court over this way.” Dante pointed them towards the cement path leading away from the giraffes.
Nick saddled up to Eddie who wrapped him in a one armed hug. “Thanks for coming Eddie, I know this probably isn’t your thing?”
“What you kidding me? What Bronx kid hasn’t been to the Bronx Zoo? No way could I let you two come here without me. Take a wrong turn and end up in the botanical garden. You know how fucking boring that place is? Only fun there is at Christmas time when all the schools in the borough send their kids there to decorate a tree with pinecones they painted.” He pressed a quick kiss to Nicks blonde hair. “I’m having a great time.”
He’s not whipped, shut up. And even if he was those bucks and their big ol’ boo boo eyes are just all around unfair. What man can deny them? No one that’s who!
“Oh man, you guys are gonna love this.” Dante ran over in an excited bounce before gripping both their hands and pulling them forward.
He should find out what kinda workout top flight had been doing with Fox cause wow, Eddie had timbs on and Dante was still pulling him with no effort. The smell was his first warning that things were about to not go his way.
“What the fuck?”
“Oh wow that’s so effing cool, can we actually ride them?” Nick was already taking off running before he actually finished speaking.
In the middle of the area was a large flight of stairs and platform with camels walking around a ring. Dante and Nick were already on the platform waving him over.
“Fuck.”
He reached the top just as a handler got to them with a camel and the ticket taker was explaining the rules to the younger men.
“Uh, you guys have fun. I’ll go and wait behind the fence, maybe snap some pics for you.” Eddie offered, with a far too even tone.
“Not necessary sir, the ride comes with free photos. Please step right up.”
Did the camel just glare at him? Can camels glare? Shit, do they bite?
“Nah, my man I’m good.”
“Come on Eddie, there’s nothing to worry about.”
“Please Eddie.” And there went the big buck booboo eyes, damn.
The man helped Dante and Nick onto their camels as another trainer came over with a third camel for Eddie. This one wasn’t looking at him angrily, just kinda eyed him then looked away.
“I don’t think so, pretty sure there’s a weight limit or something.”
“There’s no weight limit sir, you’re fine. Step up please.”
Well now what was he gonna do? The owner ain’t worried, the workers ain’t worried, the camel looking at him like he ain’t worried so now it’s just Eddie being a little bitch and ain’t that bout a muthafucka.
With a tired sigh he walked up to the platform and allowed the workers to help him onto the seat. His legs stretched far too wide to be comfortable and damn he had apologizes to make to some of his brats cause his balls and dick were gonna be sore. The camel's knobby knees knocked while they walked around the ring. Eddie’s body flopped around as he tried to not look as ridiculous as he felt.
“Yay Eddie!” Nick and Dante cheered for him on top of the platform as he, the camel and trainer made their way over.
The group hug both men gave him pretty much made up for any annoyance or embarrassment he had.
“Here’s your photos.” A staff member passed over print outs of each one as they rode the large beasts. He didn’t get to see Dante and Nicks because he was on the top and Nick was already pulling out his phone.
“Oh my effing God I gotta send this to the group chat. They’ll never believe this.”
Jesus, Mary and Joseph, the things he lets himself get talked into.
13 notes · View notes
spacedhead · 8 months
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homestuck rereading post #3: hivebent part 2
(im adding this part when im done with this whole thing but most of my text is referring to the image under it unless stated otherwise. but i think you can tell based on the spacing when that isnt the case)
im beginning to think these titles are too long. anyway LETS FUCKING GOOOO I LOVE TAVROS NITRAM
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one thing about him is that he loves fiduspawn. which as we all know is an allegory for pokemon. is allegory the right word? sources say: probably not
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:) hes clappingggg
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do not answer that message. keep looking at your posters. if you know whats good for you you wont even look at your computer . throw that shit away
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whats her deal????
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⬆️ okay well that was actually a pretty tame first interaction. she was just like haha tavros im gonna beat you at this game L and tavros was like uhhh i think we shouldnt talk . but you know him. he continued talking to her anyway. like a chump or something
what is her deal!!!!!!!!!!!!! why does the story keep framing kanaya as this bugger/meddler/fusser . she is so cool though and Normal.
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tell me why this is so scary . what is this a horror story. relax
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/ROLLS EYES
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me on the overwatch grind every damn day
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karkat wishes he had even an ounce of the swag and rizz nepeta has. you will never be her.
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this is kinda funny. but he is lame its true
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TAVROS GAHH YOU KILLED YOUR LUSUS. FUCK
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foreshadowing.... this is like in dragon ball z when goku and piccolo are fighting raditz and goku is like "well strength isnt the only thing that matters in a fight!" and raditz is like "you are a fucking moron LMAO"
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it actually isnt a real thing to say. so
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oh man this is so fucked up
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man he cannot catch a break right now
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this interaction between karkat and vriska is interesting to me cause its karkat being like a really awful person to vriska and i would feel bad but i JUST watched her paralyze tavros while berating him and laughing at him. so its like damn. i dunno how to feel ...
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okay well . this is a little bit rude but whatever
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this is so awesome . you love to see a girlboss winning
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what is she waffling about
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i have nothing to say about the equius stuff. anyway check out this particular interaction. ⬇️
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⬆️surely no more stabbing in the back between these two.
me when someone tells me vriska has w rizz. idk . this is crazy though
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oh Wow
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she is fuh reaking out right now . someone please get her some therapy. also all of them? all of them need it
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tavros is on that no hate grindset i love to see it
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i wonder if i had different color blood if my fans would turn on me. some fans they would be.... i actually have no idea what im talking about right now but i love to ramble on and on about inane bullshit so
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handshakes all around to those who made it this far.
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WOOOO RESIDENT LESBIAN INTRODUCED. the crowd goes fucking insane
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ROSE MENTIONED!!! gosh it feels like its been so long since ive seen her.....i miss those damn kids....
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im being forced to end this one here (i hit the image limit) but im coming back with a vengeance soon because we are just getting started with this DAMN SESSION
6 notes · View notes
grigori77 · 1 year
Text
Critical Role Campaign 3 Episode 38
Matt, attempting to pick between a French and Cajun accent as Gambit ... oh dear ... on the other hand, Taliesin for the Mr Sinister love, nice one mate. Then there's Laura, looking PARTICULARLY cute as Rogue, which is nice. And then there's Marisha, who genuinely IS Jean Grey in that outfit ...
Meanwhile Sam clearly didn't get the memo since he turned up as Mr Fantastic. WHO ISN'T AN X-MAN!!! As the others continually remind him ... also those ridiculous extendo-arms are CLEARLY gonna be an issue going forward. I foresee considerable dice chaos with THAT shit.
Mighty Nein reunion? Really? Oooooooh ... sweet!
Liamreally committing to the Cyclops goggles might be a mistake too. We shall see ...
More whispers of U'kotoa ... XD
IT'S THURSDAY NIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT ...
Damn it ... yet again Marisha is missing from the table. I really am starting to hate this.
Okay, come on ... come on ... this really is gonna be weird if we get super emotional with everybody in fancy dress like this.
FCG: "Lady Vex, is your husband gonna be okay with this?" Vex: "He'll have to be."
Pike says to stay hydrated, kids!
Friend or a fight ... hmmmm ...
Fearne complimenting Pike is still some meta weirdness. That ain't going away any time soon.
Yeah, Delilah's kind of like herpes, really ...
FCG: "You need to hold my hand?" Sam shoves an extendo-arm into Matt's face. He accepts the joke with impressive grace, actually. Somehow Sam does not derail the solemnity of the moment.
Come back to us, Laudna. Please come back ...
Orym making red poppies bloom in Laudna's hair, that's so sweet. ONE SUCCESS!!! YES!!!
FCG: "You may not have been perfect, but you have loved, and a soul that loves at least TOUCHES perfection." Cast Compel? Seriously? NATURAL 1?!!! SHIT!!! Did he ... did he lose her?
Imogen, you're our BEST HOPE. You got this ...
Fuck, Imogen's contribution ... that's just ... fuck, she's crying and I'm crying and we're all crying ... persuasion check ... oh fuck, no ... 7? Shit ...
Gods, please, PLEASE let this work anyway ...
Wait, Pike's all floaty, that's a good sign, right?
Matt, get this resurrection roll right, man ... damn it, he's taking a picture again ...
Oh no ... what ... what does that mean?
Pike slaps Laudna awake! Wait ... MARISHA IS BACK!!! SHE'S BACK!!! YES!!! Everybody's so happy and everything is right with the world again.
Oh gods I love that Laudna's first thoughts are to ask after IMOGEN. That's love, baby!
FCG casts Detect Thoughts on her ... tiny emotional roller-coaster, man!
Vex is aiming a bow at Laudna! Yeah, that's about right ...
Seriously? Sam's gonna take a piss NOW?!!!
It's Laudna. Pike says it's JUST Laudna ... so is she gone? Insight check? Pike seems honest ... phew.
Yeah, they're in Whitestone. Chetney, to Laudna: "It's not like it was!"
Laudna has NOTHING to be sorry for ... hey, stop messing with her, stop telling her it's been YEARS!!! I mean yeah it's funny but still!
Whoa, riflemen? Fascinating ...
Yeah, that's right, WOULD SHE know who either of these women are? Intelligence of 6? Really?
Laudna: "You're very pretty." Vex: "So are you." Okay ... more meta weirdness.
Holy shit, the place is SURROUNDED!!! Yup, that's gotta be Percy. Yeah, it is. I am not even remotely surprised.
Laudna remembers what it used to be as she sees what is now ... oh, the Sun Tree, that's gotta be a hell of a thing. Laudna wants to go to it and I do not blame her at all.
Raise Dead ... yeah, that's right, she's gonna be a mess for a while after that.
Travis continues to roll like shit and I love how enthusiastic he is about it. XD
Laudna wondering if this isn't just one of Delilah's tricks hurts so much ... she's just TRAUMATISED right now, isn't she? She's still imagining the OLD Sun Tree with the hanging bodies ... the kids! Oh ...
Wow, the kid actually getting that she's FUN scary is so sweet ... oh man, Pate is gonna just blow this kid's mind fight now! "He smells funny!" Laudna: "He knows, he's a little sensitive about it."
That is SUCH a different thing from the scared kid's in the first episode, it hits SO HARD ...
Laudna hugs the Sun Tree ...
New Form of Dread ... wow ... she's embodying the Sun Tree in its life cycle! That's so awesome! Like magical therapy!
Uh oh, here comes Percy ... be nice, please ...
Holy fuck ... is he actually APOLOGISING?!!! My gods he is ... wow ... growth, man! Nice one!
Laudna: "I named my pet rat after you." Percy: "I'm sorry?"
The Sun Tree is warm ... EVERYBODY TOUCH IT!!! Ashton: "I'm just enjoying the view right now, I don't know if I can. It's just hilarious." Meanwhile Chetney gets wood ...
Yeah, Keyleth talks to the tree, everybody knows that. Laudna: "Hello, tree."
Vex continues to twist Percy around her little finger and I love it. To be honest I think he's mellowing in his old age ...
Ooooh ... Vex takes them on a tour of Whitestone.
Pike REALLY has to look up at Fearne. I love it. Seriously, Ashley are you REALLY gonna pick your old character's pocket? Whoa ... the holy symbol? Oh boy ... yeah, that wasn't gonna work, was it? Nice she gave her a pass, though. XD
Sam sneezes during Laudna's big emotional revelation. For once Ashley doesn't tell him to stop it ...
Ooooooh ... Find Familiar? Is this gonna work? Oh please let this work, the possibilities for chaos are GIGANTIC.
Fuck, it speaks! That is BRILLIANT!!!
Matt doing Familiar Pate is so fucking mental, I love it! XD this is gonna ne a riot.
Fuck, this just keeps getting better ... and Travis is DEFINITELY creeped out ... Laudna is starting to rethink this and realising it won't actually end ... hmmmm ... oh, yes, he hides in her hair, that could work ...
FCG is reminded of Shithead ... Laudna suggests he use it as therapy. Yeah, that's actually smart.
Awwwww ... Vox Machina memory lane ...
Okay, fancy dinner, this should be entertaining.
Guide Osly Kamida. Okay.
Okay, is FCG actually offering Percy some THERAPY right now?
Oh sweet, a reminder of Taryon and Doty! Awwww ... yeah, actually that might be a smart port of call for FCG actually.
Oh boy, Fearne is actually really asking for a tiny pistol for Mister. A Gunkey! Adorable ... XD Flaming shit, yes ... Holy shit, this is actually gonna work ...
Percy: "Certainly the most interesting dinner we've had in a while."
Imogen's quick thinking helps Vex avoid a Laudna triggering lobster course crisis ... Nice one. Then she checks for invisible guards with Detect Thoughts. Smart.
Mister gets his tiny pistol. Okay ... this could be problematic ... Percy advises Fearne wait until AFTER they leave the city before giving it to him, which is definitely for the best ...
Rapidly prepared potato soup ... yeah ...
One last little talk before retirement ... here we go. Oh yeah, Everybody Loves Manners ...
Oh fuck yeah, the residuum ... hmmm ... AND the Potions of Possibility ... yeah, this is gonna unsettle them a bit.
Yeah, nobody like the Cerberus Assembly much ...
So Percy already hashish eye on the Apogee Solstice, makes sense. Yeah, tell him about Ruidus. The cage, AND the city ... whoa, he doesn't seem surprised at all. That is FASCINATING. Does he know something already? Holy fuck HE DOES!!!
The Divine Gate. The post Calamity boundary between this world and that of the gods. Oh ... so the thing with Ruidus MIGHT be something else, then ...
Bloody hell Sam, what the fuck are you doing with your flask this time? Bloody hell, way to derail the whole episode ... XD
Friends in Vasselheim ... oh yes indeed ...
Fearne: "So this ... I'm sorry, I don't know anything." XD
Chetney compliments Percy on his clock tower. Uh huh ... years of intensity. Yup ...
No Chetney, the world is NOT flat. Percy sets him straight. I doubt it'll take ...
Oh yeah, call up Eshteross' friend to open the tree up for them. Smart.
Oh boy, the moment Percy leaves Chetney starts flirting with Vex. That's adorable.
D'awwwwwwww ... Laudna and Vex bonding ... it's gone beyond just a shocking reminder for her now, she really has become find of her now, hasn't she?
Did Fearne just invite Vex to some bedroom shenanigans?
LIKE a real family? They ARE a real one now, surely. XD Taliesin's costume makes the group hug a bit weird.
Camping trip out by the Sun Tree. Perfect. Oh, and it's warm there too, that works.
Matt: "And we're gonna go to break!" Everybody cheers when they realise the group are FINALLY back together, and NOW they're doing the mTh on JUST HOW CLOSE they came to failing ... oof ...
Yeah, that 2 part Mighty Nein reunion special sounds pretty frickin sweet, my man ...
Oh fuck no not another FUCKING RUIDUS DREAM for Imogen! And she's just IN THE STORM straight away ... FCG is with her, okay, that worked. Interesting ...
Is Otohan there? 16 on a Perception roll ... there's SOMEONE here, moving around in the dust. They go to follow them ...
Not Otohan, someone BIGGER. Hmmm ... ah shit, they're gone. Oh, so they were a ghost ... like with Bertrand ... someone just died? Oh fuck, who is it? Please not Eshteross ...
Really? You guys are gonna try to FLY in this? Well, at least that means they CAN use their spells here. But what kind of spell slots do they have? Ah ... FCG can't use HIS magic here, then. Hmmm ...
Oh, well THAT didn't work ... now they're just getting CHUCKED AROUND something awful.
19 Perception check ... Imogen is the same, but indistinct. Because it's a dream of course, surely. FCG thinks it makes her look cool.
Imogen tries to Message Eshteross through her dream ... no joy? What does THAT mean?
Oh, so it's not her magic, just her WILL that makes all that work. Okay.
And now they're in SPACE. FCG: "Where are we?" Imogen: "We're on the moon, bitch!"
Wake up ... well, at least they got a long rest.
Liam: "Orym's been doing crunches for 20 minutes."
Does Fearne have Speak With Plants? Technically since she just woke up, she could ...
Laudna lets Imogen keep the necklace. She will get a lot more use out of it, after all.
Matt: "So Fearne, are you doing this?" Cue laughter ... arexwe gonna get Sun Tree?
Oh cool, we are! XD I have totally missed that voice ... I love stoner Sun Tree ...
Fearne asks Sun Tree if he has any plans for the Solstice ... Nd he gives her consent to open him up, too ... that's so adorable ...
Oh fuck ... no response from Lord Eshteross ... no. Please no ...
Okay, maybe he's just sleeping. But they need to get back ... they need to contact Shania Twain or whatever her name was ... but first, BREAKFAST!!! It is awful early still over there.
That IS the only face he can actually make, so ...
Chetney in Imogen's dream ... not sure that would be the smartest move.
More flat earth humour ... XD I swear that is not getting old.
Goodbye to Vex, then? Chetney tries to drum up a little extra business.
Oh, here we go ... he finished Imogen's wooden horse ... with no metal of any kind! Special rare wood ... is it called "plastic", perhaps? "By the way if you wind it the wrong way it WILL EXPLODE!!!"
Ah yes ... SHOPPING. Might be a good idea.
Trying to get the horse to work ... Taliesin: "The tension is killing me."
Sam making podcast narration jokes ...
Is it just me or is Matt's Vex getting increasingly camp?
FCG's message to Shania is a total mess ... I am NOT surprised she hasn't got a clue who she's talking to ...
Matt: "THERE IS A GIANT CLOCK ... LITERALLY RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE TOWN!!!"
Oh gods ... second message is WORSE ... they're all dying of laughter and so am I ...
Two hours ... REMEMBER THAT, people!
Gilmour's Glorious Goods! OMG!!!!
Oh man ... it's not ACTUALLY Gilmour, though. Just Jerry ... guess he'll have to do.
Ah, the in-game abridged version ... yeah well since it's not Gilmour it's probably best.
Ashton seeks a bigger stick ...
Healing Potions, always a sound investment.
Magical trinkets ... Laudna makes Jerry show off his inner nerd. Oh wow ... NOBODY speaks Elven? Really? Fancy little magic flying griffon toy ...
FCG beelines to Horizon Temple. Ooh, this place is really pretty, sweet statue ...
Ah, here's the Guide himself, he seems nice. FCG seeks answers of the Changebringer. I still suspect he's finally found his goddess. Sounds like I may be right.
Ah, the tongue ... the tongue ... witness Matt die inside a little again ...
FCG tries praying to the Changebringer ... and now he's lost in the town ...
Sam continues to play around Sith his extendo-arms. Cue chiding from Liam: "Samuel!" Laura: "Ooooh, full name!"
Back home through the tree. It's only six in the morning there ... might be all right after all ... whatever, back to Eshteross' place. But CAREFULLY ...
House looks fine ... 18 perception check from Orym ... seems okay ...
Imogen tries another message ... still nothing? Damn it, this is making me crazy now ...
FCG is going to try Locate Creature on Eshteross ... it works, it senses Eshteross. But DOES THAT mean he's still alive?
Cue in depth discussion about whether they can send Pate in to check without him getting destroyed?
Now Chetney's going in invisibly. Is he not worried about the traps?
29 to pick the front door lock ... nice. Now Time for the flying undead rat ... here we go ...
Pate continues to be hilarious. He's ridiculous and it's adorable. Given Marisha's still learning how to have a familiar it's extra fun watcher go mad trying to work out what she's doing ...
Shit ... DOES Pate have Dark Vision?
Signed of a struggle ... oh fuck ... yeah, Eshteross' traps have clearly wreaked havoc on whoever came calling. Not good.
Chetney smells blood ... oh boy ...
Oh, I have missed Laudna's creepy whispers, even under the circumstances they're still fun.
No ... no ... Eshteross is down.
That perception check is BALLS. Chetney is going to get WRECKED going in this room.
Man, Eshteross is a MESS. Perception check for familiar scents ... NATURAL 20!!! Yup. Smells like Otohan WAS here. Thought so.
Chetney tries to move a lockbox and triggers a trap, gets himself AND Eshteross hit. Ouch ...
Nope, Eshteross is OFFICIALLY dead. Argh ... why can't we have nice things, Matt? WHY?!!!
The lockbox opens. Travis: "And I die." Matt: "Game over." Travis: (imitates explosion)
Lots of letters ... oh, there's one for Bells Hells ... noooooo ...
Oh man ... he really did like them. That makes me so sad ... HE LEFT THEM THE COOKIE RECIPE?!!! SERIOUSLY?!!!
Holy fuck he left them the Silver Sun! THEY HAVE A FUCKING AIRSHIP OF THEIR OWN!!!
Matt, being a sadist, makes Travis roll for stealth to make sure he's not tracking through the blood ... 21! Nice ...
They can NEVER remember that bloody name ... the Soot and Swill, good call. Go see Pretty! Yes!
The blood smell on the cane makes Orym remember his husband's death ... and THAT'S IT for tonight! Oh man!
Eshteross, nooooooo ... just when we got Laudna back, too ...
23 notes · View notes
epickiya722 · 1 year
Text
REACTIONS TO EPISODE 19 - FULL POWER!!
You know what goes on here.
LAST EPISODE'S REACTIONS
And here's the beginning of the one Deku Arc that gets me in my feels.
Yes, give me that Izuku narration! Even though it was just for the letter reading.
Ochaco, don't cry. Please don't cry! 😭
There goes his pose! That he makes looks cooler than Batman.
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He looks and depressed already and this arc just started!!
The last time he wore that hoodie was back in season 4.
Oh, it's Shindo and Nakagame!! Grand and fucking Turtle Neck!!! Why is her hero name so funny to me?! 🤣
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Shindo and his thot version of Froppy's hero suit. Keep doing you, boo!
It's nice Shindo mentions Ms. Joke since she is their teacher. I like that. And I like Ms. Joke, she funny.
"Now they're sending in kids." Yeah, but GROWN FUCKING ADULT HEROES ARE FUCKING QUITTING. THOSE KIDS ARE YOUR BEST BET, ASSHOLE.
I'm okay, I'm fine.
I get that you want to defend yourselves, but allow the heroes that are still around to help.
That's right, Shindo, tell them.
"... sticking their noses in our lives?" Uh, if Shindo and Nakagame are there to take you to their school...
I can't stand the citizens sometimes because oh, you were worshipping heroes before but now that they're quitting you want to give the heroes who are still around a hard time? They ain't perfect but damn.
"If we could take them by force..." May be extreme, but you gotta protect folks and if they're giving you a hard time... return the fafor. I'm joking.
Ah, shit, it's that muscly fuck!!! I HATE HIM!!! SO MUCH!!!
"You two, let's have fun!" SIR, THOSE ARE KIDS, DAMN!!!
WHEN DID SHINDO INVEST IN SWORDS?!
Did he just push her?!
SOMEONE KILL THAT BITCH!!
WHY RUN BACK TO THE WINDOW?!
12000 layers? Sir, that is disgusting.
"Sometimes, we have to sacrifice our lives!" SHINDO! 😭
"I'll turn your brain into a milkshake!" PLEASE DO!! I HATE HIM!!
Ew
LET'S GOOOOO!!!
I'm glad, as a purple lover, that Smokescreen is purple!!! 💜
"It's you, isn't it?" You're gonna wish it wasn't Deku, bitch.
Dingy looking ass rabbit... looking like a cryptid... I adore him.
"I'm just a human, too." You are???
Why would he put that rock there?
"Fight me will all you have, Midoriya!" Alright then, you asked for it. Don't cry now, don't cry.
"I can't see his face through the smoke." You won't be able to anyways, Tatami. He's wearing a mask.
EN!!! Wait... you're the purple one?! YES!!
En is also very pretty to me.
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Ooooh, he's still being all calculating and stuff in a fight. My green boy!!!
Real quick, I love how Midoriya's mask makes his eyes look like All Might's. Especially since All Might's eyes like that are a reflection of him being a shell of what he used to be in his prime. Current Midoriya is well... a shell of himself. He's pushing himself and neglecting how others feel just as All Might did.
"I want a life without regret." Bitch, you ain't Miruko.
BEAT HIS ASS, DEKU!!! DON'T ASK HIM NO QUESTIONS!!!
I'm not fighting anyone who looks at me like this and just standing there. That is a person ready to snap your kneecaps.
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I LOVE MY GREEN BOY!!!
But damn it, this arc just makes me sad...
Fucking wow...
FINALLY ALL MIGHT GOT ONE!!
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Oh, it's those other hero kids!!!
"We don't want him to die." OH DO YOU?!
Deku passing by the glass just like All Might... THE DAMN PARALLELS!!!
You think Smokescreen smells like lavender? I hope so.
All Might got drip, huh? Them glasses!!
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He still has that ringtone?! 😆
I need Izuku to get a bath and a blanket like today.
INKOOOOOO!!!!
I forget how buff Midoriya is sometimes... his face just hides that, okay?
"Please be more cautious." We can only hope...
All Might standing there like "... ah, crap, here we go again..."
Pretty shot of Izuku. He gets his looks from his mom. She is a damn pretty woman.
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I'll be honest, out of all the families, the Midoriya's is my favorite. They have had the most tender moments and I swear I shed tears with them.
Ooh, the baby Izuku flashback playing with Inkoooo... 😭😭😭💚💚💚
"Don't worry. I'll come home." 😭😭😭😭😭
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NOT ALL MIGHT CRYING, STOOOP!!! 😭😭😭😭😭
DOES HISASHI CRY, TOO?!
Why in the absolute hell is Best Jeanist holding that phone like that?
"The way he holds that phone is so cool." Hawks, stop lying.
I am impressed though.
Ooooh, Gran Torino giving him the cape...
Ooooh, getting more of the 2nd & 3rd Users next episode? 👀 Lady Nagant??
9 notes · View notes
tsuki-sennin · 7 months
Text
Kamen Rider Gotchard, Episode 2! It's felt like months since last I saw our boy. Man, I still can't believe this show is real, it's so goddamn cool. If I were a kid, I'd be losing my goddamn mind like three times as hard.
Spoilers, I guess...
-Houtarou-kun befriended the Chemy Hopper1, and with his help becomes Pretty Cure- I mean, Kamen Rider~!
-Okay, you're a person of higher authority in a Kamen Rider organization, that means you're definitely hiding something, Minato-sensei.
-Fun fact about me, I used to be super into studying alchemy as a belief system, and it's all because of the ol' massive Gnoggin Pokémon conspiracy theory of a franchise reboot, which was basically just an excuse for them to unload every cool interpretation about certain Pokémon they could parse.
-...and in a weird way, that reboot ended up being true.
-Shout outs to Lockstin tho, fr, makes fantastic content.
-Never heard of cram school, my dude?
-What do?
-Do alchemists get paid real money, or does Houtarou have to spin lead into gold?
-Oh, opening!
-All these goofy ahhh characters we'll get to know over the next year.
-Ooooh, he says Henshin in sequence!
-Who's this person with their face censored, I wonder?
-Skebows...
-Golddash...
-The Alchemist Academy uniform feels very Golden Sun-y.
-Ohhhhh...
-Traitor, I see.
-Poor Kudoh. Her Dad is under the "traitor" curse.
-The Alchemist of Dawn...
-This is so magic school manga, holy crap.
-Kamantis is a thicc boy
-"Change the weights. Balance them perfectly."
-Hello, Ma.
-Wow okay
-Dad didn't die, he just dipped.
-Skateboarding~!
-Oh hello, Ryo.
-SKEBOW
-I love them
-Skebow~!
-Kid's got the moves.
-Oh shit, robbers.
-...why did you stop in front of a playground, are you stupid or something?
-Malice.
-Houtarou's having a bit of a hard time parsing the material.
-Holy shit, that play structure looks so cool.
-Wish my town had budget like that.
-Kudoh, are you sure you wanna perform out here?
-To create... life...
-It seems our new Malgam's a bit of a tricky dicky.
-Malgam Nation.
-These're some damn creative monster designs.
-Money, money, money, money~!
-Free the Hopper.
-Man, I hope we're gonna see Rinne keep being cool. We're 4 for 4 on Reiwa seasons with great female leads, I hope we can hit 5.
-"You will not evade me, Skateboard Fairy!"
-Violence time.
-Lots of kick flips.
-Gotchanko!
-OdoriMantis~!
-Oh no you don't~!
-...oh yes you do!
-Hello, Minato-sensei!
-GoldDash...
-"Dash! Dash!"
-Oh hello
-That must be Mr. Spanner.
-Spinout!
-That's one way to go around!
-OH INSERT SONG?
-HELL YEAH LET'S GO
-OH FUCK BEVERLY IS THAT YOU????
-Oooooh, right in the trucks.
-Hop, hop, hop~!
-God, this is so cool.
-Skebows~!
-MY MONEYYYYYYYYYYY
-Later, pal.
-Balance~!
-If it works, it works!
-Ring~!
-That means you're part of a
-BIG SHOT
-Alchemy~!
-New people.
-Oh fuck, speaking through a tablet. It's Banno 2.
-"Kamen Rider? Not Funny, Didn't Laugh."
-AppareBushido~!
-Valvarad comes.
-See you all around, I suppoooooose.
2 notes · View notes
grendelsmilf · 2 years
Note
this is an excuse to talk abt amphibia to your hearts content (if there’s any thoughts that’s still unsaid)
debating whether to use this ask as an excuse to talk about the ten years in between w the gorls and sasha and anne’s relationship specifically or whether i should discuss hop pop’s ambiguous backstory which keeps me up at night. ok ykw im gonna do both
gonna start w the hop pop thing:
so we know that he went to college because he says he majored in theater, but the only university we see in amphibia is in newtopia, and it’s pretty damn clear he didn’t go there. maybe there are bigger frog cities, or smaller newt cities? there are literally no schools in wartwood, but he obviously grew up there bc he’s a plantar, so like. what’s the deal with that. and then there’s the fact that he’s The Wrecker, which is literally never brought up again. sprig asks him if he’s ever killed a man and he’s just like “ha ha okay!” and they move past it. but hop pop has definitely killed a man. if not multiple. much to think about.
and then of course, the ultimate mystery, which is hop pop’s kid(s). since he’s sprig and polly’s grandpa, that means that his kid was either their mother or father (I’m gonna say mother bc it seems more thematically appropriate, what with leif, and sprig’s discussion of his mom and everything). and we know he never had kids with sylvia, because sylvia’s kid is ivy’s mom, and that would be weird as fuck, so he must have had some other frog wife or smth, that he talks about just as little as his dead kid (okay maybe they weren’t married, but then again, hop pop is very traditional and a huge romantic, so I do think he was probably once married and she died, maybe even in the same heron attack). but yeah, obviously the funny little frog show would not go much in depth about the tragedy that has plagued hop pop’s life, but it makes me so sad to think about how he lost his family, and we know so little of his past otherwise. hop pop is a really underrated character and I think about him a lot ok.
and okay now onto the sashanne of it all:
first of all i think sasha and anne would start dating a little after marcy first leaves, because it just feels like the natural extension of their relationship. and it feels so right, but it also starts to occurs to them that they’re actually too attached to each other, and with all their baggage and codependency, they’re stagnating as individuals outside of this specific relationship. i think anne’s parents would probably help her wake up to this fact, but it would be difficult to talk to sasha about it at first because anne is literally her only real support system, and even then she’s only very recently learned how to be vulnerable in front of her. sasha’s like “man I miss grime. he always had the best advice.” and anne’s like “girl wtf are u talking about his advice was always to like. behead ur enemies and die gloriously in battle” and sasha’s like “yeah........... <3”
anyway anne tells sasha that even if they should make new friends and see other people for the time being, that doesn’t mean they’ll stop being friends and sasha is like “you better fucking mean that bc idk what i would do if i lost you (again)” and anne is like “same tho” so they find new friendgroups and new interests and people to date outside of just each other, but sometimes they still just call each other up at night and have a sleepover and talk about all the fucked up shit that happened to them, or they’ll find each other at school and just hug for a really long time without saying a word and then be like “thanks” and walk away. and their new friends in their new friendgroups are always like “wow it’s always so weird to me when I remember that you’re friends with her” which causes them to laugh so hard.
anne sort of dates some of the dykes in her friend group, but she realizes she still has a lot to work on emotionally before entering a serious relationship again. I see her first serious relationship (outside of sasha) being in college with an indonesian girl who really loves reptiles and softball (everyone always jokes about them being girlfriend twins and they’re like NO we are SO DIFFERENT ACTUALLY!!!!), whereas sasha actually gets a serious boyfriend when she’s 16 and they’re together until they part ways for college. at first anne is kind of blindsided by the fact that sasha is with a GUY, not because she’s biphobic, prommy!!!!! but because it never occurred to her that sasha would actually have different taste from her in any area ever, and here she is liking MEN. but sasha’s bf is actually really good for her, and they’re genuinely happy together, even if no one is more surprised that sasha likes a boy than sasha herself.
when sasha has sex with him for the first time she calls anne up afterwards and is like “ok so I technically lost my virginity??? that was Sooo weird” and anne’s like “weird bad?” and sasha’s like “no it was really good.... just weird. I guess I always pictured you there..” and anne’s like “you mean like, in the corner, watching?” and sasha laughs but then she doesn’t really elaborate bc she knows anne knows what she means. the fact that they’re not literally experiencing everything together is still kind of surreal. and then anne is like “okay well you should tell marcy too bc this is the kind of thing she’d find fascinating. like anthropologically” and sasha does but almost immediately regrets it bc marcy seems to care way more about the details of the sex, like “how does it work?” and “is the female orgasm actually a myth?” etc etc. but then sasha asks marcy about the new ttrpg she’s playing and oh so cleverly diverts marcy away from analyzing her nascent sex life. thank god.
they do end up going to prom together (sasha’s bf is just like “okay I mean. I guess I have to be fine with this.” hes rly chill so he doesn’t mind that sasha is still clearly in love with her ex and said ex loves to affectionately bully him at all times) and the night kind of gets weird towards the end when they’re just drunk enough to get emotional but not too drunk that their brains don’t work, so they ditch the afterparty together to go sit on the swingset from their childhood in the middle of the night in their fancy little outfits (I think anne would wear a suit but idk if sasha would wear a dress or a suit. either way they’re matching in purple lol) and they just talk and drink and cry a little. and then sasha’s bf drives them both home. the next morning anne wakes up to her first raging hangover and she calls up sasha like “ok do u feel as awful as i do right now” and sasha’s like “honey I am so sorry to tell u this but not even a little bit. I’ve been drinking since I was like 12” and anne’s like “WHAT??!?” and then sasha reminds her that she is descended from white people who love vodka and anne is like oh right. okay yeah.
after sasha and her bf break up on mutual amicable terms bc they’re going to different colleges, she only ever dates girls afterwards. anne sort of wants to chalk it up to a fluke but sasha insists that she’s bi, even if she is like, a kinsey 5, and anne’s like “okay fine. I think [insert guy from kpop group here] is hot but you don’t see me iding as bi” and sasha’s like “anne I had SEX with him. a LOT.” they text pretty frequently even though they’re at different schools entirely for the first time ever. obviously they’re in a groupchat with marcy and they have been forever, but they also have their own private chat for when they wanna talk about things that marcy just wouldn’t get, or when they wanna talk about marcy (mostly just about how happy they are for her that she seems to be really thriving with her friend group of likeminded nerds who actually care about tolkien and shit like that). but they don’t see each other every day anymore, and that’s kind of weird. but then again, it’s also part of growing up, and they’ve grown a lot since their amphibia days.
when marcy visits for anne’s rebirthday, they are all so happy to see one another, and they talk long into the night. at which point marcy finally learns that anne and sasha dated for like a year after she left LA. and she’s like “why did you keep this from me???” and they’re like “oh.... it wasn’t on purpose” but it suddenly occurs to them that they never mentioned it in the groupchat or even when marcy came back to visit all those times. that’s probably bad... right? at least they’re not codependent like that any more though. and sasha’s like “yeah we are fully formed individuals now” and they high five and at that exact moment they both realize that if they wanted to try dating again it would probably go a lot better this time around. at the very least, they’d have the tools and real life experience (and not just experience leading armies) to work through their issues when they arise. so in real time marcy watches them be like “wait do you wanna try this again? I mean im down if you are but like....” and then they both turn to marcy and are like “you’re invited too of course” and marcys like “wow im so flattered! this is a dream come true for little ol me! but actually, im in a serious relationship hehe!” and it’s their turn to be like “WHAT??????”
14 notes · View notes
lemmypilled · 2 years
Conversation
TD incorrect quote dump
tojika, handing out popsicles: Which flavor do you want?
yoshika: Blue flavor!
tojika: Uh, you mean Blue Raspberry?
yoshika: Blue flavor! Blue flavor!
tojika: Blue is not a flavor!
yoshika: BLUE FLAVOR!
--
futo: LOWERCASE LETTERS ARE FOR THE LOWER CLASS!
seiga: And here we have a capitalist.
mamizou: Did you just-
miko: Let us all take a moment to appreciate that all of human history, human language, and the universe itself aligned to make this joke possible.
--
miko: Did you like the food I made?
kogasa: No, not really.
miko: But I put my heart and soul into it!
kogasa: No wonder it tastes so cold and dead.
--
tojika: I fell—
miko: From heaven?
tojika: No, I literally fell—
miko: In love with me the moment you saw me?
tojika: MY ARM IS BROKEN!
miko: Okay, but do you think I'm pretty? Be honest.
--
kyouko: So, nue is late today. Anyone wanna bet why?
kyouko: I say they slipped through the subway grate and are having terrible sex with the mole man.
futo: I don't know about that...I think either their alarm clock didn't go off, or they're in line at the bank.
seiga: Take this more seriously! nue was clearly taken in their sleep!
tojika: I bet they tucked themselves into the bed too tightly and got stuck.
mamizou: Maybe they fell into another dimension where they're more interesting...?
*nue arrives*
nue: Sorry I'm late - there was a problem at the bank.
futo, clapping their hands in excitement: HOT DAMN!
--
mamizou: *angrily presses nue against a wall* WHERE'S THE MONEY?!
nue: ...
nue: Are we about to kiss-
--
yoshika: What’s sexting?
nue: I'm not having this conversation with you.
--
tojika: That's not funny.
kyouko: I thought it was funny.
tojika: You don't count. You started laughing in the middle of a funeral because you started thinking of a meme you saw on Facebook.
--
kogasa: Do we have any orange juice left?
futo: *pours the remaining juice into their cup*
futo: Sorry, we’re all out.
--
kogasa, to mamizou: You know, nue can be really aggressive, so it's important to take all the necessary precautions when approaching.
kogasa: *blows airhorn at nue* GET FUCKED!
--
kyouko: The first time yoshika opened a box of Cheerios and looked inside they yelled, "OH WOW! DONUT SEEDS!"
--
tojika: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?
miko: Milfs.
kogasa: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.
tojika: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???
kyouko: Mom in late forties, dad in late forties.
kyouko: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.
kogasa: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck.
tojika: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—
tojika: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!
kyouko: Oh, is it not mom in late forties?
miko: What? No! It isn't!
kyouko: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!
kogasa: kyouko...
kyouko: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!
kogasa: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.
kyouko: TOJIKA, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!
tojika: The word milf has been ruined for me.
miko: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!
kogasa: Y'all are dumbasses.
--
seiga: Why cant trees give off something important like wifi??
yoshika: So fuck oxygen, I guess.
--
kyouko: *is wearing silk pants* How does this look?
futo: Like its slips on and off really easily.
kyouko:
futo: No, I didn't mean it like that-
tojika: We know what you meant.
--
futo: *slams books down in front of tojika*
futo: Boil up some Mountain Dew. It’s gonna be a long night.
tojika: You could of said literally anything else.
futo: Cauldron boil and cauldron bubble, Baja Blast to fuel my trouble.
tojika: I’m going to just stop challenging you when you say random shit. I won’t win. I realize this now.
--
mamizou: Get your hand off my shield!
kogasa: There's like a million other shields.
mamizou: Take that one, it has a flower on it. Girls like flowers.
kogasa: *hits mamizou with the shield* Oops! Now this one has blood on it.
--
yoshika: What are you two arguing about this time?
kogasa: They’re always using common phrases incorrectly!
futo: Cry me a table, kogasa.
--
nue: I can’t believe all these people are wearing black. black is supposed to be my thing, they’re all just posers.
miko: nue, for the last time, we’re at a funeral.
--
miko: I am so horny and angry all the time.
--
miko: As top in this relationship, I think we should-
tojika: I can't believe you're pulling rank on me.
11 notes · View notes
waynes-multiverse · 1 year
Note
Oh, Wayne - this was GLORIOUS!!! This is the first time I’ve laughed today, and I needed it so bad! Starting with “Seth Rogen” I get it - looks may fade, but sarcasm? That shit is forever! Intelligence and personality means far more than a pretty face.
And I swear you were reading my mind in this! “Yep, Dean fucking Winchester – God of all Gods, monster hunter extraordinaire, hero of all innocent damsels, and idiotic clown of all clowns, shamelessly stole her heart since… well, pretty much the minute they met and she first laid eyes on him.” Yep, this is so me - have tried to deny love at first sight, but Han Solo and Dean Winchester - I was a goner at first sight! And “Dear fucking God, why did she have to fall in love with that dork? Why can’t it be some nice, normal guy without an abundance of commitment issues?” Again?!?! Get. Out. Of. My. Head - It’s scary in here! (But then again, I have more issues than a magazine stand - but then again, so do the real and fictional men I love, sooo…but I digress)
You made me laugh so hard with the collision and Dean’s reactions: ““Baseball, Sam drinking green smoothies, a scratch on Baby’s new coat of paint…” “We should, uh, probably, uhm, detangle…” “His dick is an escaped zoo animal and clearly on the prowl tonight.” BWAHAHAHA!!!! All three dogs were passed out, so all three got treats thanks to your glorious sense of humor! (Quinn says thanks again, BTW)
“It’s-, uhm, it’s okay,” she says surprisingly,”. Damn right it is! (Or maybe left). “Or that… you could do that…”. Yes, yes he could - all damn day…and night…and…oh, wait, where was I? And “Well, uhm, like I said – not that long… Just a very short period of time… Like, since November 29th… 2012,” I’m sure if we give it a couple more years, I’ll be completely over you.” AWWWW!!! I love bashful, silly Dean. But I love her response even more: “Uhm, well… is that something you would like? I mean, to get-, uh, would you wanna get under me?” Girl, I would have stood up and clapped, because that is a total boss move, but I’d drop my phone! In a million years I’d never be brave enough to do that, or “No, I think we’ve been taking things slow for long enough.” QUEEN! She needs to be worshipped for her quick wit and bountiful blessings she is about to receive!
And then I’m giggling again at “Jesus, Y/N… Going in for the kill, huh? You can’t say stuff like that to a man in a compromising position,” and “grabbing her a little tighter before bolting down the bunker hallway like a little kid on Christmas morning.” Then right back to sweetness with “he hopes the thing does as advertised and fucking remembers her forever.” That was just so perfect!
And that thorough fucking? “Wow” indeed! How could you not be after something like that with someone like him? But him asking if she was lonely, then straight to moving into his room - so damn sweet!
And the sass with the whole scene with Sam’s return and knocking him out of bed? Bwahahaha!!! “Oh, because I’m gonna rail Y/N in every room we have.” HELL YEAH!! Yeah, book that room, Sammy - right after your therapy session! This was SO DAMN GOOD! I needed this silliness and sweetness today more than you know. Thank you so much for this wonderful, hysterical, hot ride!! Happy Unattached Drifter Christmas to you ❤️
Are you aiming for a best reader award? What’s happening? 😳 Also, I literally love you to death for this 😘❤️ Here’s your award. You may take the boy and the prize:
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And yes, thank you! Humor and personality is so important! I don’t wanna be bored to death for the rest of my life 😂 And who wouldn’t love this adorable idiot?
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Besides, who’d want a perfect person? The pressure! Like, I don’t trust those motherfuckers. Nuh-uh, if you don’t have obvious flaws, you’re definitely a psycho and I don’t wanna be dismembered and buried in your yard 😒
Hahaha and well, that thorough fucking came from my prompt in the initial request (“soft love making”). You know me well enough by now to know I just run with that shit 😂🖤
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And yeah, I guess Sam thought they were like Ross and Rachel, buy really they turned out to be Monica and Chandler 🤣
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So happy I made your day a bit better with a few laughs, hun! And thank you for this amazing ask! Love you 🥰❤️😘
2 notes · View notes
saitama-division · 2 years
Text
ARB Birthday Special: Lola Takahashi
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~~ July 30th ~~
“A wonderful dress can infuse a woman with confidence and inner beauty, empowering the way she moves and feels.”
Login Lines:
“A present? For me? Aw, babe! You shouldn’t have!”
“That’s right, it’s my birthday today! I’m so happy you remembered! *mwah*”
Voice Lines:
“I know it’s my birthday but I feel like giving back, after all, I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for all of you!”
“Okay, what’s the schedule for today? Hmm, partying, partying aaaaaand….more partying! Perfect! This is gonna be good!”
“I’m calling up Dolly and the girls, my birthday ain’t complete until me and my squad paint this town pink!”
“You know, you really made it in life when an entire city celebrates your birthday with you, seriously, they placed pink streamers and even changed the street lights pink! Isn’t that amazing?!”
“All of my modeling agencies threw me a surprise party! Even the girls I recruited sang my favorite song! It was adorable as it was hilarious but it really made me happy.”
“Hmm? Ooh! More gifts! Yeah, you can put them with the others, yeah, I know, there’s a tooooon, I had to put them in the guest room but even then it got filled up so quick. I’m looking forward to opening them! God, cleanup is gonna be a nightmare…”
“Sayaka!! Aww, thank you, sweetness! Y’know, you really didn’t have to get me anything, as sappy as it sounds, just having you here already makes me happy but knowing you, you probably already have something for me, okay, what has my special mommy got for me?”
“Wow, this is…actually pretty sweet…wait, you said you and Yoshiko worked on this?! Didn’t think she would sacrifice some of her dolls for little ol’ me. I swear, that kid’s got more talent than most people I know! Aw, c’mere! *hugs* You are the absolute best! I’ll come over later tonight but give Yoshi lots of hugs and kisses for me!”
“Okay, now I’m really excited for what you have for me, sunshine. You’re still not too upset about what I got for you for birthday, right? Okay okay, just making sure, so to be clear, you have used it rig-ow! *laughs* Alright alright, I’ll stop!”
“Sweetheart, you really know a way into a gal’s heart. I mean, the sculpture is fucking gorgeous and makes me look like the goddess that I am but the fact that you got my favorite drinks, my favorite pack of smokes and a pretty pink pocket knife makes it all the more better! *hugs* You’re really something else, Kureha, I’m really glad I met you.”
Sayaka Lines:
“Lola! Happy birthday, dear! It’s hard to believe you’re 26, you still look like you haven’t aged over 20! I can only imagine the envy some women have over you, how do you do it? Ah, sorry, I got off track, I’m here with your gift!…Aww, having you here makes me happy too, I know we didn’t get along at first but now I can’t imagine my life without you. Here, your present.”
“Do you like it? It was actually Yoshiko’s idea, I was actually surprised myself. I actually made the catwalk while Yoshiko dressed up the dolls, she paid a lot more attention to you though but I think it’s because she got to dress you up all pretty *giggles*. See? You’re in the middle on the catwalk and me, Yoshiko, and Kureha are on the side cheering you on!”
Kureha Lines:
“Happy birthday, Lola. Damn, time really flies by. Feels like yesterday that we…ah, nevermind. Yeah yeah, I got your presents. I swear, you’re like a kid…but it is your birthday so I guess I’ll let it slide. I still haven’t forgotten your “present” on my birthday but because I’m so nice, I’ll spare you…for now.”
“Look, I know you’ve been getting fancy shit from everyone all day, I mean, the sculpture isn’t really any better but by the time I decided to get you something else, it was already done so…here, another thing to brag about I guess but still, I hope the other gifts are okay, I kinda had to cut a few corners to get the alcohol and cigarettes and don’t even ask about where I got the pocket knife, I’m only slightly breaking the law because you’re like a sister to me…happy birthday.”
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captorsicallfriends · 2 years
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Right so pretty much-
It was a lovely day. The sun was shining. Birds were chirping. Mosquitos were having an orgy on every available surface. And my friend and I were enjoying our ice creams we bought from the school tuckshop. Could this day truly get any better? Oh goodness, how convenient, a group of teenage boys have come to enjoy the day with us! "Hello divine creatures of the earth, what questions are you pondering on this beautiful day? I'm so grateful to walk and share the land with which we exist, god, what a blissful morni-" "oi ya friend's got a fat arse innit bruv?" Oh.... Oh I see....... Yes.... Good morning to you too, holy blessing of which I exist in the vicinity of. God fucking damn it I hate this school. Also why are you British all of a sudden we're in the middle of the Australian summer where are you boys coming from I swear you had an Aussie accent the other day now all your friends are turning British which is arguably the worst philosophy you can choose like what So anyway my friend just so happened to hear this which must have been a massive mood booster I'm sure 🙄 but I said to her "dearest friend of mine do you give consent for me to drag this fucknugget to hell and trudge him back a tarnished rag of sweat and entrails?" And she was like "yea sure idc go wild" and like. You know when you're dog is a fucking crack addict and probable serial killer and you throw him stuffed toys on occasion to watch him rip it to shreds while foaming at the mouth with the spirit of Satan and all 10 deadly sins (greed, lust, pride, envy, gluttony, sloth, wrath, advertising, police officer, and Sagittarius btw if U even care) ripping through his eyeballs and turning them to lasers while he tears through the suffie's throat and lights it on fire, which is of course a normal human experience shared throughout humans which I am. I am a normal human and have normal human life experiences. I can be trusted with the bouncy rubber balls because I am normal. A normal human who has not eaten half of one as a dare in primary school and had to sit in the nurse's office for 2 hours. I would not do that because I am normal. Ok good? Okay. So yeah that was gonna be me with this poor fucker in a second. So there I was: storming over there faster than the white ladies at the McDonald's storm over to the manager's office. I didn't know what I was gonna do once I got to this kid but it wasn't gonna be glamorous. And as I got closer I realised that my 5'1 ass probably didn't stand a chance against a kid who looks like he does hard drugs and is willingly on a sports team. Fuck. But oh ho ho what do we have here,,, it seems a rather large and pointed stick is conveniently lying on the ground in my general direction. Excellent. I'll spare you the details Diya but what I will say is there was a lot of "holy shit this bitch fuckin' mental ay G" and "god damn bruv calm down you on ya period ay dog" and a distinct lack of "wow that person sure looks hot chasing that frat boy around the school oval with a stick while reciting the communist manifesto and spitting on his shoes I wonder if they'd like to get tea with me and maybe kiss a bit idk" honestly Diya the things I'm robbed of. But anyway once I was done torturing disciplining this child I went over to the only other frat boy who remained and threatened to snitch on him to his mum if he watched shit like that happen again and did nothing. Saving humanity one girlboss at a time ig ✌️✨ but yeah don't do crack kids or do idk none of my business if you need a dealer my dog's been living with me for ages I'd appreciate if he'd get off his arse and get some money or something but yeah U didn't hear it from me (you can find me in the nearest sewer btw bring cookies) yeah okay peace love U baaiiiiii 💖💖💖
things like these are precisely the reason your alias is insane anon.
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