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Hello to the invisible girl

With hair that curls

And eyes that burn like fire

With a voice that sings

And a heart that races to be acknowledged.

Hello to the invisible girl

With pain that needs to be seen.

You feel it hot and cold

It inches toward your soul

It winds around your arms

Takes breath from your lungs.

Hello to the invisible girl

Who sits alone in the dark

Whispers surround you ears

Emptiness seeps into your eyes

Silence leaves your mouth

And nothing grips your hands.

Hello to the invisible girl

Let yourself be free

Let yourself be free from here

Let yourself be free

They won’t ever see you

Not the way you want to be seen

So here and now I beg you

Let yourself be free

Let yourself be free

Hello to the invisible girl

You control the world

Scream and yell

Kick and cuss

Throw those middle fingers up

Hello to the invisible girl

Let your rage fly free

Let your truth be known

Let yourself be free

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When depicting the moon, we always picture this lovely young woman with silvery hair in beautiful flowing robes. But what if she wasn’t young. It’s indisputable that the moon is a beautiful woman, she waxes and wanes, and in the grand scheme of the universe, of our solar system, she is relatively young, but what if she were instead an elegant ageing woman. Her strength comes and goes, but the dark of the night is always there, spotted with stars, eternally youthful, supporting her. As her strength wanes, he slowly embraces her, his arms cocooning her in his blanket of stars until she has enough strength to shine ever so brightly once more.

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Hey Tumblr! Great news, I’ve made some progress in my NaNoWriMo novel… mostly in technically the wrong section but it helped me figure out why I’ve been struggling the past few weeks. Let me explain.

So this year, rather than doing a full novel for NaNoWriMo, I’m only doing a specific section of my book. Due to the way my novel is structured, my book has about three to four groups of chapters that could each separately be considered its own arc, like a mini-novel within a novel. Also, my book is a literal behemoth (I say not having written most of it) taking place over five years of this one kid’s life in a city in the midst of extreme political turmoil, with an array of different characters I had to make interesting and complex, all while keeping track of the book’s many themes and my own less-than-mediocre prose! 

Because of all this self-inflicted insanity, I knew I could not write the entire book in a month and do it justice, so I did the section after the opening arc. Because my chapters tended to be very lofty word-count wise, I split this arc of the book further into two sections so I was more likely to complete it in one NaNoWriMo. Thus, the chapter I made the most progress on was still in the same arc as the one I was writing for NaNoWriMo, but not the right section of said arc

But I don’t care, because I wrote seven pages in the span of a few days, and its some of the best writing I’ve done since I started writing this arc of the book.

So, for context, due to my protagonist, Davy, and his classmates effectively antagonizing the city’s basically evil and somewhat fashy version of the Boy Scouts, the school he attends ends up getting burned down (not by the evil knock-off Boy Scouts, just a group associated with them). The chapter I made tons of progress in is basically the fallout of that event, and the first scene of the chapter is extremely dreamlike and almost poetic. The only problem I had was transitioning out of the scene and making it seem like Davy cared more for a certain character that went missing in the fire than he actually did (when part of the point of this chapter is that he doesn’t care more about said character he wasn’t very close too and the guilt he felt over that). The chapter is very angsty, and floaty, and I actually manage to describe stuff in a way that doesn’t suck. Is it very good? Probably not, but it’s a good and cool enough first attempt for me to be proud of it.

Writing that section of the book made me realize that my problem I’d been having all NaNoWriMo was that I was kinda dreading moving all my writing from the YWP site to Google Docs. When I realized this and transferred all my current work, my productivity increased ten-fold, and I’ve even broken into chapter seven of the novel with five pages written! Now, whenever I finish writing for the day, I transfer all of my writing from my chapters in Google Docs to the NaNoWriMo site (because I’m still determined to reach that write every day for thirty days goal goshdarnit!). I know that there’s an option to just manually update your word count goal instead of copy-pasting stuff onto the sight but… copy-pasting what I wrote feels easier to me so…

Boy, this was a super long update. Thanksgiving Break has given me a lot of breathing room to work on my project clearly. Anyway, that’s all for now. See you next week Tumblr!

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Thank you for the tag @pheita!

“Funny thing. Storm rolled right down off the mountain. Rained so hard the whole plain turned to mud.”

Tagging: Anyone who’d like to take part!

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T[ hree nights ago I dreamt that I ate a single chip.

The taste of sour vinegar hit my tongue, and for once in months I felt like maybe I was allowing myself to enjoy again.

I woke up in tears, gagging and screaming and choking,

The fake chip lodged in my throat;

Lodged in my heart.

It took me minutes to come to, but longer to stop the tears that started out of fear and in slumber. ]


[ I do not enjoy.

I may not indulge. ]


[ Your favourite food won’t make you skinny.

Your favourite song won’t make you happy.

But I pray that one day I can view myself the same way that I view others.

Because if you are reading this, you deserve love.

And I hope that one day so will I. ]


[ I am biddable but I put on brave faces.

I sit down as if pride has never been a word in my vocabulary.

I am humble and hungry and hurting.

I no longer know satisfaction or joy, just expectations and the need to excel. ]


[ I am a woman of superstition.

Woman.

The word is foreign on my lips.

The word does not belong to me.

I may appropriate what I do not know.

But fortune cookies do not come true unless you swallow them down.

378 calories, and all just for luck.

That doesn’t feel like luck to me.

It is a personal torture that I refuse to keep down. ]


[ Is this who I am now?

Throwing up ice cream cake on my birthday because I can’t bear the thought of those calories digesting?

Or them manifesting into my darkest demons?

They’ll tell me that I didn’t deserve it.

I don’t deserve a full stomach or a happy face.

And they would be right. ]


[ Linoleum doesn’t feel nice on my knees, but it is cold.

It’s alright, I think.

My skin is always running hot anyways. ]

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A Midnight Melt

enveloping hues in the heat of our bodies we’re closer to melt

motionless powers of an unconsumed magic bind us together

alone and in sync lost in the embrace of time welcoming slumber

.

3in1 haiku #321

.

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That’s 2,555 words written today and just over 10k for the month over the past 8 days! Plus a LOT of editing for Aspirancy, which will be finished with edits next week!!!

I’m gonna post some excerpts of what I’ve been working on tomorrow I think, I’m really proud of it so far!

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Thank you for the tag @akindofmagictoo !

From the Nano project To The Mountain:

Will that work? She sounded equally suspicious.

“Trust me.”

Very well. Aubi gathered herself and stooped through the clouds, wings tucked tight to her side. He was convinced she was about to crash into the ground, such was the speed at which she dropped, but held himself in abeyance. He had to trust her, and thus allow her to trust herself.

But he was grateful when a hand reached out to squeeze his.

Tagging (No pressure): @rhyaxxyn @thel3tterm @catharticallysarcastic @writemares @adelinemwriting and YOU

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Little secret from my WIP: The ‘whispering’ characters often hear when an ELF or Changeling is around is actually a form of echolocation - they themselves are blind when completely invisible since all light bends around them.

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