#writing analysis

[thecagedsong]

Okay, so I've seen a lot of complaints about the writing in totk, but I think the critiques are taking too narrow a view. Sure the arcs seem flat if you start from the point of Zelda and Link traveling below hyrule castle, but I don't think that's where you, the viewer, are supposed to start. You're supposed to start the story from the true ending of botw, and in doing so, the character arcs become not only beautiful, but complimentary and fulfilling. Spoilers under the cut.

Why should you start at the end of botw instead of the start of the game? Easy, because the game has to start in medias res, it's the nature of the game, but the story the game tells starts where botw leaves off.

They did this in botw. The game starts in the shrine of resurrection, but the story starts with Zelda's first journal entry/memory and the story is really about discovering your own fall and the rebirth that comes after destruction once hope exists in the light. The character arcs are about Zelda going from stubborn isolated powerless princess to conquering evil with the power of love. Link goes from the stoic knight that puts up with every expectation and falls to Link the amnesiac going at his own pace, at his own freedom, and succeeding.

The same way botw's story starts 100 years earlier, you have to start Zelda and Link's totk arcs from the true ending of botw. From the girl that had come to terms with her own powerlessness and sought to begin rebuilding from ash and the boy who fulfilled his one task, and is still choosing to use his freedom to help the dethroned princess rebuild.

The way Zelda is written is beautiful if you start from there. Because botw ended with her accepting that she had worth and duty beyond the golden power, and totk tells you how she showed that worth through service to her people. That girl that dreamed of being a scholar became a school teacher. That girl that had to fight so hard for her father's love and was convinced that everyone hated her own powerlessness? In her powerlessness she shared her knowledge with people and became loved for it. That girl who we left seeking the Zora, the only people that would remember her, when almost no one knows about the princess who was locked in the castle, is now known throughout the land. The girl that was missing for 100 years with only the sheikah remembering her, she disappears and the whole kingdom fights to find her.

The girl we saw walking away from the ruins of her home and her cage, listening to the distant goodbyes of her long-deceased loved ones, now has a home in Hateno where children run up to her house with just as much love screaming her name.

Now, in the middle of her arc, the start of totk, Zelda goes to confront the ghosts of Hyrule castle. In all her adventures in the time skip, Castletown and the castle are nowhere on the list. They are as destroyed as they were at the end of botw. BUT she has healed and grown, and is now strong enough, and ready enough to fulfill her duty, that she can return.

But she doesn't come back as it's princess, seeking to rebuild, she comes back as the archeologist, seeking to plunder its secrets. She hides the Champion's tunic there, (with a riddle involving light) and gasps in delight over all the archeological discoveries that had laid hidden beneath her feet all these years. She can handle the empty castle as a scholar.

But then she's in the past, and she's without Link, and she's meeting the people that established the kingdom she let fall to ruin. Zelda learns about the importance of being unified, as seen from her requests to the ancient sages, a central theme of totk. Zelda faces her own powerlessness when Mineru tells her there is no way back, and when Sonia begins to teach her control. Zelda immediately despairs over ever having the control and power Sonia wields, and it's the same frustration she had with her golden power when she was younger. But she asks for and accepts help this time (like she should have from Mipha in botw) and she gains control and power and it isn't enough in the past, but she knows how to make it enough.

Having united the sages, they watch her sacrifice in a sign of respect. The sheer ceremony of the moment is like nothing we've heard about what Zelda was like during the time skip. It isn't Miss Zelda the teacher that built a school in hateno, or Zelda the scholar that walked through Hyrule castle, it is once again Zelda the Princess making this sacrifice to swallow the stone.

It's meant to parallel the moment in botw where Zelda gets swallowed up by the Calamity. But you can see that she is surer of herself, centered, unafraid, and she does not ask Link to save her. She is not praying and looking back and asking Link to come save her. Instead, she tells him to save Hyrule. And it has meaning because she is also Zelda the scholar and Zelda the teacher and the thousand of other things we learn about her activities during the time skip. That is the hyrule she wants to save. That is the Hyrule she seeks to unite by asking the sages to bind their people to help Link in the future.

(She pressed the sword to her chest in a way that mirrored her stabbing herself, this time it is Zelda who died so that Link might live in the future.)

When Zelda tells Link that she's come home, you cannot say she has not changed from the homeless girl who had just learned to accept that her worth did not lie in birthrights and golden power. Zelda had learned her worth in the skills completely absent of any power, political or golden, but in the second half of her arc took up power and leadership again because that was what Hyrule needed of her. Because of the examples of Sonia and Rauru and because her fallen kingdom wasn't united and it needed to be. She is so much more complete than at the ending of botw, or even the start of totk. She has retaken the mantle of Princess, but she knows what it is about now and I don't know how else to say it if you aren't getting it.

Then comes Link, whose flexibility as the player has always required a less complex character arc, and probably deserves its own post, but I want to give it a quickshot anyway. Link leaves off botw probably still missing most of his memories, with the mastersword on his back, this time choosing to protect and walk with Zelda on her journey around Hyrule.

In the time skip, we learn that he sticks to her like glue. Princess Zelda and Link are perpetually paired by the people of Hyrule. Link barely even registers in people's memories without Zelda around, because he hasn't truly left her in all 5-7 years during the timeskip. He is known (again?) as 'Princess Zelda's loyal swordsman'. Is that a sign of him reclaiming some of his past life? Could be. What's important to learn about Link in the time skip is that he is no longer alone. Which is a big step from botw ending Link, who was always alone and had just begun traveling with Zelda again. From the rootlessness of botw, to saving Zelda, to making Zelda the place he always chooses to be, that's how Link's grown in the timeskip. He is no longer alone because he has Zelda.

He has someone worth fighting for now, he has memories of someone precious, someone he scours Hyrule to find. Link's freedom in botw was about discovering himself, but in totk, he is using his freedom to do everything to go to her. HE HAS A HOME NOW AND ITS CALLED ZELDA. Investigating rumors, walking into obvious traps, asking everyone and their dog about her. The goal of the game is to find Zelda. Bring her back.

And then you learn about Zelda's transformation. You see her crying. He pulls each of her tears and memories into himself. And this time it's Link asking 'do you really remember me?'. He has to take up Zelda's role and bring the amnesiac back to herself, give her back her memories. The job's not done because he found her transformed, she needs her memory back, it's not done until she's back and knows herself.

This arc is coupled with Link confronting his own failures. He was at the height of his powers when the demon king Zapped him and he let Zelda slip through his fingers. He failed her, just like he did before. And the people that do recognize him without Zelda all ask him where she is, and he has to admit he failed to them too, something he didn't have to do in botw.

But unlike botw, where he failed and the solution was to get strong enough not to fail/be strong at the same time Zelda is, in totk, the solution is to unite with allies. Unite the tribes, accept their help, and only then is Link and crew strong enough to take on the demon king.

It is only when he also takes up the mantle of Rauru and Sonia and unites Hyrule into a single force, it is only when he accepts aid from the past and pulls their vision of hyrule into the future, that he gets Zelda back. Zelda needed to learn how to take up being a princess again for the sake of Hyrule. Link needed to learn how to unite Hyrule for the sake of Zelda.

And though I would have liked Zelda to be a little dragonish, or Link to deal with being an amputee, it doesn't bother me that much because their arcs weren't about that. I don't think it makes the stories bad writing.

But you have to start from the true ending of botw to get that.

#totk meta #Link #Zelda #zelink #totk #totk spoilers #writing analysis #positive writing analysis #I spent way too much time on this but it's been a while since I've done this so its okay

[42starsintheuniverse]

Sokka & Zuko- The Invisible Winner of the Kataang/Zutara Debate.

Please don't take this as "Shipping War Bait", I'm doing a character analysis of ATLA about my opinion on which close Zuko relationship makes the most sense!

I feel like fandom treated Zuko/ Sokka as a crack ship but like?? That's never made sense to me.

Firstly I personally think that Aang will always remember how the fire nation destroyed his people. No matter how much he consciously says he forgives Zuko (& the fire nation) I would BET that unconsciously there's still something deeply hurt in Aang that can never truly be healed about that. As a result, Aang would not be able to LOVE Zuko as close as his other relationships. It's one of those hard to swallow pills but it's just how I interpret the characters. Aang's body has that bias, the deepest parts of his mind won't ever forget the horrific fact that his people are dead because of Ozai, and Zuko is Ozai's firstborn.

I know Aang's whole thing is that he preaches forgiveness, but here's the thing... We aren't always aware of how deeply our trauma affects us. Sometimes you don't hold a conscious bias against people... You hold an Unconscious bias. And to me, Aang holding an unconscious bias against Zuko, and not being as close to him, makes sense.

Toph could honestly work with Zuko, I think she's also a good contender for closest relationship. Though I see it in either a platonic or romantic sense (depends on the vibe). I think there could be a bit of 'fandom implicit bias' there in having Zuko and Toph constantly presented as platonic only. Like, Toph is disabled, she's blind... Do we ever question that maybe we don't like putting her with people romantically because she's disabled? Is Katara the one people ship Zuko with romantically- because Katara is more traditionally attractive? Toph is short, stocky, has short hair, is brash, and blind... Like, there's a chance she doesn't get the same treatment as Katara because she's not traditionally attractive in the way Katara is.... Something to think about.

-All that being said, I like Toph and Zuko as having a close bond either romantically or platonically. I think it's funny that they're both born rich kids, I think it's funny that they only have one fully functioning eye between them (and the comedy and hijinks that leads to). And they do work really well together throughout the show, Toph forgives Zuko when he accidentally burns her feet. And Zuko clearly appreciates how chill Toph is- she doesn't have PERSONAL bias towards Zuko as the son of the Fire Lord, in the way that the other three do.

Moving on to Katara, I have a similar sort of feeling there. It's made obvious that Katara SAW her mother die at the hands of the fire nation. It was traumatic, it was horrific, and because she was a child watching it- that is likely a DEEP core memory. In the context of the show, Zuko helps Katara find the man who killed her mother, because it's sort of a levelling of the scales. It doesn't even make Katara LIKE Zuko, it makes her neutral towards him. He helped her to basically right a wrong (that's her perspective). So yeah- for the same reasons, I've just never been convinced that Zuko and Katara could have a strong and intimate relationship because of the deepness of Katara's trauma. It takes a significant amount of time in terms of the show for her to even start talking and trusting Zuko at all. Doesn't FEEL like good romantic potential to me.

But Sokka, Sokka is the best fit of them so far. The thing is, Zuko and Sokka have a lot of different experiences- but shared values. Consider the things they've had to deal with, Sokka had to handle a huge level of grief & pressure as he quickly became responsible for his family and community at a noticeably young age. Then consider how that parallels (it is not THE SAME, but there is a PARALLEL) to Zuko's abuse & exile. They're both young men, they're both conditioned to think they should be a certain way (Sokka a warrior, Zuko a tyrant). Sokka is creative & inventive, which mirrors how Zuko has to create a new emotional source for his fire bending- once again, these are parallel elements of their characters, and demonstrate how they could relate to each other.

Sokka as a character is also slightly more separated from the association between the fire nation and the death of his mother- compared to Katara. Once again, she saw it happen right in front of her as a small child, Sokka was slightly older when the event happened, and didn't see it first hand.

There are some more generic elements of their characters that might suggest gay subtext; such as Sokka's hypermasculinity being a masking behaviour so no-one would think he's attracted to men. (Most people understand why that is; but if you don't know- leaning into very masculine things as a man, can make it feel like people won't question your assumed "straightness").

But I think what I've touched on is more relevant because it's very much tied to THESE specific characters, and how they interact, and how they could relate to each other.

TLDR; Zuko and Sokka work as a ship cos they have less things stopping them (barriers to intimacy & trauma to heal from). And they have probably the highest relatability to each other's lives, allowing them to trust each other and open up, compared to the other characters.

#ATLA #zukka #atla zukka #sokka x zuko #writing analysis #character analysis #character study #shipping #ship discussion #Please don't start huge fights about this #It's not supposed to be an attack #It's supposed to be a deconstruction of the relationships #I just hope people understand that

[oleanderblume]

I like that sir pentious is the first to ascend to heaven. I think that was actually a really clever bait and switch from the [perceived] plotting of the previous episodes, because a lot of people were lead to believe it'd be angel, the characters are more focused on Angel's path to redemption, particularly in the latter half of the series— understandably so, he has been at the hotel longer than pentious.

But the entire time, pentious does have a clear redemption arc, starting when he arrives and up to his sacrifice, it is short, and in the moment you likely dont recognize it, but he begins as a spy, and begins his redemption arc with his genuine apology to Charlie, he also shows growth in the trust episode, and a surprising amount of affection and compassion for his egg bois.

Also from a writing standpoint, Angel logistically couodnt be redeemed by the end of the first season, he's 1. A staple main cast member and 2. His arc doesn't *officially* start until episode 4. It would be deeply unsatisfying for him to be redeemed and heaven bound when his arc doesn't start until halfway through the first season and doesn't cover the full depth of his character.

So, adding sir pentious— a fairly morally innocent character from the get go, being based off classic villian of the week archetypes— into the hotel early on and ending his arc with his selfless sacrifice to comolete his redemption was a very smart move. Especially considering the time constraints the team was working with [8 episode limit]

#hazbin hotel #writing analysis #spoilers

[prof-ramses]

A Mammon Analysis Written By A Mammon Kinnie! :8D

It's time to make y'all love this magnificent bastard even more than you already do so we can finally have something just happen in this fandom!

First off, the analysis.

A lot of people seem to think of Mammon as "dumb" or "oblivious", when he's far from either. Mammon is actually a very intelligent and attentive person, but just like most subtle things about him, it can be hard to notice because of his eccentricities.

As far as I see it, Mammon views everything he does as an investment to some extent, whether it be a literal monetary one or one of time, effort and/or attention. This is also one of the big things that make him so relatable to me. It's also worth noting that as a flipside to this, he also sees any option he's presented with in terms of physical or emotional value and trying to maximize said value as much as possible.

Mam doesn't interrupt "Two Minutes Notice" not because he's stupid, but because insults don't truly detract from the value of him or anything he has, not to mention the fact that he could tell that a lot of people would be willing to buy the song, just look how many are hanging of Fizz's every word when he describes having a crappy boss.

Likewise, criticizing Fizz's weight is something Mam solely does because it helps profits and has no genuine personal issue with Fizz potentially getting chunkier.

This shows something else interesting about Mammon, he doesn't really want to do destructive things, people just keep giving him every reason to do so, he's not dangerous on his own.

Every action Mam takes that makes Fizz uncomfortable is a direct result of him catering to what the consumers want, whether it be religiously watching his spokesman's weight for the sake of keeping the skinny sex-bots accurate, or forcing a mentally unstable person to spend a lot of time socializing to get people to pay admission for a meet-&-greet.

There's also the fact that he runs Greed in such a way that benefits Hell as a whole way more than Ozzie and Bee do. Admittedly, he over charges for his products, but said products are up to snuff, you'd expect him to peddle cheap junk that falls apart almost instantly, but no, he makes quality products and just charges extra. He really is a shrewd businessman when you get down to it, and that's something a lot of people have sadly overlooked when discussing our favorite spider.

Which brings me to my next point, Mammon being a spider is actually really clever, assuming what I'm about to describe was intended and not just me reading too much into a cheap Australia joke. Spiders are often shown as eerie and a way of reminding the viewer of a piece of media that nature can be scary, and though they do some really weird and freaky stuff, that's also the beauty of spiders. They have some of the most innovative and distinct hunting patterns in nature, they're more of a neutral presence, just like greed itself.

I've seen many people claim in their analysis of Mammon that "greed can't be good" which is just demonstrably untrue, greed is really just any action that prioritizes bettering oneself, it's only destructive if you are willing to be destructive, but even then it can lead to innovation and broad positive change, even if someone is worse off because of it.

Lastly, I want to discuss Mammon's obvious need for personal affection, the big guy is blatantly touch starved and craves a close connection, I have a rather headcanon-y idea about the origin of this behavior and I plan to link to it once I post about it in detail, but that can wait. However, this does reflect that idea of value and investment, Mam has yet to find someone who is both pleasant for him to be around and whose company has a reasonable "price". I see many possibilities for exploring this facet of his characterization and look forward to seeing the discussion about it grow.

Stay tuned for my HCs and theories about his Stinginess! ALL HAIL MAMMON!

#helluva boss #hellaverse #writing analysis #hb Mammon #helluva Mammon #hellaverse Mammon #Mammonposting #hb Fizzarolli #hb Asmodeus #helluva Fizzarolli #helluva Asmodeus #hellaverse Fizzarolli #hellaverse Asmodeus

[brabblesblog]

The case of the two Astarions, on the importance of characterization and having a beta for feedback, and how one word can entirely influence character dialog.

In light of Neil Newbon's characterization of Ascendant!Astarion and Spawn!Astarion, I wanted to post this little example of an interaction between me, and my beloved beta @leomonae that demonstrates exactly how important characterization is to dialogue and how important beta work can be. Context: I, Brabbles, was working on 'Whither is thy beloved gone?', an Ascendant!Astarion romance; Mona was working on 'Thy People Shall Be My People', a Spawn!Astarion x Illithid Tav romance. Both works are specifically character-driven pieces. I beta her work, she betas mine. On this particular day, I was beta-ing her chapter 11 and found a line of dialogue I disagreed with. Here is the line, delivered from spawn Astarion to an Illithid Tav:

“No, I could have bought this from the old Tav, but you can’t seriously expect me to believe that you still care this much about respecting people’s privacy." I took issue with the bolded 'that' in that line; I felt like it should be removed. Here was my gdocs comment from then:

(Context: I write and beta with a mental construct of Ascended Astarion in my head)

We discuss the issue further, of what differentiates our Astarions in our heads - why does she like having that word in there, and why does it feel off to me?

We both sat down, and realized exactly this - that she was aiming for her spawn to have that more flamboyant way of speaking; I, working off my AA writing, was trying to smooth it out. We hashed everything out and figured out our characterization - and to see Neil talk about it was just an amazing experience. TLDR tip for spawn vs ascendant dialog: Your cue for whether it's theatrical is flamboyant, unneccessary words vs a smoother flow, but grander statements for operatic.

Notes:

The swapping clothes thing was basically me making my mental construct Ascendant swap into Spawn clothes, and then read Mona's work acting as Spawn.

"He's more insecure in her love" - Ascendant's need to turn your Tav the moment he ascends; a need to ensure he does not lose them anymore (her being my OC Ban). Would absolutely love to hear your ideas about this, and I hope this gives everyone some insight into I suppose our rather unorthodox (especially mine) writing method. <3 And to @leomonae my dear, I love you.

#astarion #astarion baldurs gate #baldurs gate astarion #bg3 #astarion x tav #bg3 astarion #astarion fic #astarion ancunin #astarion bg3 #bg3 fanfiction #bg3 fanfic #astarion analysis #ascended astarion x tav #astarion ascended #ascendant astarion #vampire ascendant #ascended astarion #writing analysis #bg3 analysis #creative writing #bg3 writing #fanfic writing #astarion fanfiction #astarion fanfic #on writing

[pinkeoni]

When I would have byler get together (if it were up to me)

I think that byler getting together is a 2-step process.

Step 1) Have them both realize that the other one likes them back, and establish this to the audience as well. This would probably be done through some kind of confession.

Step 2) Have both of them realize that they deserve to be together.

I don’t expect byler to solve homophobia, but it is an obstacle that is keeping them apart, and they need to overcome their internal conflicts to be together. Will needs to realize that he does deserve to have happiness, and Mike needs to realize that he’s at his best when he is being himself. Byler is different from other couples, and I wouldn’t want them to be treated the same as say a relationship like Jancy. Maybe a kiss can happen at step one, but there would have to be a personal development between the first two steps before they can be together together.

Realistically there are way more steps before this esp concerning Mike, including establishing to the audience that he is gay, breaking up mileven and establishing that he loves Will. This would likely require some build-up in the first half of the season.

But where would I put these steps in the story?

Byler being together together, being boyfriends and established, is something that I can only see happening at the very end. Although those two developments I mentioned I can see happening a lot earlier.

So this is a breakdown of the three act structure:

Pretty standard stuff. Not every story follows this exactly although ST follows pretty classic storytelling rules.

I would put step one around the midpoint. This might not be exactly in the middle of the season, I would likely place it in episode 6. Three act structures are not evenly divided into three, the third act of the whole season would probably be the last episode— or two depending on how they do it.

There is a confirmation of feelings— maybe a kiss comes with that. But they aren't out of the woods yet, and it's not the only thing that they have to contend with.

In-between steps one and two is where I would put a challenge that forces them to really confront those internal conflicts. Is Mike willing to live this life truthfully? Is Will able to accept that he is allowed to live his life happily.

And step-two would come during the third act climax, so the final battle of the series. I put it here because not only is it the climax of the entire season, but it's also a climax for their emotions and their character arcs, where they are able to overcome their personal conflicts, complete their arcs, and finally be together and know that they deserve to be together.

But ya know, that's just how I would do it.

#byler #will byers #mike wheeler #stranger things #writing analysis

[shyjusticewarrior]

Don't know if this'll make sense to anyone else, but Rosenberg writes Jason with men written by women energy.

#dc #dc comics #comic books #comics #matthew rosenberg #jason todd #red hood #jason peter todd #jason todd wayne #batfamily #batfam #batkids #batboys #robins #media analysis #writing analysis #character analysis #comic analysis #character appreciation #men written by women #media commentary #batman characters #opinions #writer appreciation #detective comics

[mdhwrites]

Why Is Liar Reveal So Big?

It's hated after all. Maybe behind fridging and some other miscommunication plots, it seems to be one of the all time hated tropes ever. So why would a writer be dumb enough to use it? Let alone so many writers, even ones considered to be great, use it?

Because on paper it's a perfect plot structure.

I'm not exaggerating and I'm not setting something up. I'll of course talk about why so many of these plots face plant but from a writer's perspective, the use of lies like this is tantalizing. It comes with a three act structure baked in after all:

The cause for the lie and using it.

Growing closer to those you have lied to and realizing that other people and the truth are better than whatever you're getting out of the lie, creating a character arc for the main character and an underlying tension to everything.

Big climax when the lie comes out, people get upset and something has to be done to showcase that growth before a denouement that highlights how the liar is a better person now.

And even better is that you don't have to justify the conflict essentially at all beyond why the person is lying. After all, lying is one of the very few universal taboos that someone can do while still be redeemable to a general audience. You can't really walk back murder without it being almost entirely altruistic after all. You can have someone lie for selfish reasons though, or even good reasons, and have everyone understand that you just need to learn a lesson but that people will be justifiably pissed at you, even if you claim to have a good reason.

This is actually a really big deal with how The Liar Reveal trope is seen nowadays because, frankly, I think some people have been desensitized to the fact that lying is a big fucking deal actually. Everyone focuses on what the lie was about. Why the person lied. If they lied for a good reason or the thing they were lying about is nothing major, doesn't affect anyone in the grand scheme of things, what did it matter?

Well... Why did the person lie then? Lying is a universal taboo because it is a breach of trust and a show that someone around you doesn't deserve honesty. For one reason or another, lying to them was preferable to even a short conversation explaining what the fuck happened. This is weirdly actually why cheating, or more so getting caught cheating, is such a big deal. It's not that you cheated, it's what cheating represents: A break in how you let your partner see reality, a breach of trust and a dismissal of their worth because they didn't deserve to be talked to about these issues but instead, you decided it was better to run around behind their back. In both cases, worse yet, you only do it like this because you KNOW you wouldn't get away with it otherwise, or you believe that, so rather than own up to the consequences or put in the work to earn what you want to do or make up for the mistake you made, you lie.

That's genuinely reprehensible and will hurt people when they find out regardless of the reasons you had. You still broke their trust and they now have to deal with that. It's frankly why when I talk about Luz lying in The Owl House, i emphasize both how she's willing to tell the truth to some people but then explicitly, after being called out multiple times and making a promise to be more open/honest to her girlfriend, she lies to her partner more than ANYONE ELSE in the entire show. That is just strictly unhealthy and Amity should be fucking losing it by the end, either with self loathing by the diminishment of her person hood that having her partner so flippantly dismiss any reason to communicate with her would cause, or with fury at Luz for the fact that despite so many times seeing how lies hurt her, Luz just keeps fucking doing it!

But that would lead to the classic third act breakup in a romance story and EVERYONE hates that... Right?

Yeah no. The Third Act Breakup from lazy writers is admittedly where a LOT of the hate for this trope comes from but that's usually because the lie itself is dumb. You've already been chafing at the lie the entire time because frankly no one in their right mind wouldn't have just told the other person. That or it wasn't actually a lie and instead just the other person finding out something that their partner had literally no reason to ever bring up and then wildly overreact to. The lie only exists for this moment of cheap drama rather than having actually been a conflict in the story.

BUT. A good romance that has lying as a part of its premise will recognize that that's not okay. That it's just a dog shit foundation for a relationship. So... Then we get the climax I talked about. We get this big moment where the liar has to prove that they've changed, that they've learned and are willing to put the work into fixing the trust they broke and abused and come out the other side stronger for it. You know, actually give a satisfying conclusion to the fact that we've had to put up with this character lying about this from anywhere from ten minutes to fucking HOURS. Without that payoff, especially if the character doesn't appear to learn anything or grow without it... Why the fuck did we put up with the lie?

It's why SpyxFamily's conclusion can ONLY be when the three lies are likely revealed at the same time to Loid and Yor. Or, potentially better, Anya's lie is revealed first and as they deal with that, they realize each other's lie. Now SpyxFamily is actually one of the best examples of a liar reveal plot because you understand the stakes of these lies and why they must be kept, even by the child, VERY WELL. After all, in that story, if the lies come out, everyone? dies. Maybe Anya just gets sent back to an orphanage but that already is pretty bad but there's no doubt that Loid dies and Yor's job going public would still mean the Secret Police likely having to kill her. There's no doubt in any viewers' mind that these secrets HAVE to be kept.

But that tension has to pay off eventually. If the whole series goes by without our principal cast learning these secrets... Well, it's a Chekov's gun that never fires. You're waiting for it, it clearly needs to happen to resolve this plot point... And then it never does. If it does happen and Yor goes "Oh, you may be an enemy of my country but you're a good guy so I'm going to skip along," that's equally dissatisfying. It was such a big deal that an anti-climax like that would just kind of rob every bit of weight to it and probably cause rewatches to be a lot less satisfying than a big, knockout brawl over it or a big, heartfelt speech about how it doesn't matter what country they're from, what matters is that they're good people.

TOH spends like an hour and a half having the main character freaking out about how everyone will hate her for her what she thinks she needs to lie about... And then it never leads anywhere. It even gets resolved and then continues, making the very small, minuscule bit of payoff feel like nothing for a plot point that has been making the tone of the show MISERABLE. It's not even like we get a big group hug with Luz being overjoyed about being wrong to payoff all that angst. We get essentially nothing and the arc is left pretty much unresolved for no reason despite them having such a clear opportunity to wrap it up when her friends do get told the truth.

But people praised it because it didn't follow the formula. But... Did that actually make it better? Tropes exist for a reason. The Liar Reveal trope especially exists for a reason. They're very good at giving audiences the satisfaction they may want or to create good drama. If you do all the initial steps, include all of the deeply frustrating elements to a trope like this, all of those that have good drama and tension, and then only subvert the payoff?

I'm sorry but that's not clever storytelling. That's just bad. It's like when a tutorial makes fun of hand holding tutorials as it's painstakingly holding your hand through every step of the process. All you're doing is making the pain of the tropes worse while patting yourself on the back. While lying to me about not doing the thing you're doing.

And sorry but... Apparently you need to go through your own arc of this trope then since even only okay/mediocre versions of this trope like Over the Hedge recognize that by the end, it's better to be honest than being self congratulating and lying. Almost like themes like that are baked into the trope.

So maybe stop jumping on the band wagon and actually ask what the other problems are with how this trope is used rather than claiming this trope as a whole should never be done. It's a tool in a writer's toolbox like any trope and (besides fridging) it shouldn't be thrown out just because it has a bad rep. Not when it so clearly exists for a reason.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

#Liar reveal #Tropes #writing analysis #writing #TOH critical #spy x family

[aetherin21]

And with kindness leads to greatness

Patroclus is a kind man, written in between his words of doubt and low self esteem. The way he treats women he encounters with care and empathy speaks volumes then the words he utters.

His mother, everly so writtenly as meek and homely seemed to shine in his eyes as the sandy beaches of his home. As though, supposedly to dispise her from his father's lament. He remembers her simpleness like the warmth of the fading sky. Drifting and disappearing. But as the strings of her lyre, she is there only existing.

When Deidameia got pregnant with Achilles and learned that he will never ever love her, she was angry, disappointed and thrown away. She was promised of the boy and so she gave. And out of sheer destruction of a heart break, she agonizingly seeked comfort from Patroclus and demanded to lay with her so she could even by a small margin feel the soul of Achilles mending her broken heart. Cause as Patroclus quoted he is half of Achilles soul.

She's a victim in all of this as much as she tries to stand between the two lovers. And Patroclus understands this. Bedding her too but out of sympathy and kindness that she wanted to feel.

He was so human that when Briseis was turned into a prize of war, he urged his lover to take her and save her from being soiled by Agamemnon. He befriended her, clothed her, and taught her the way of the greeks. And as more prizes come, if by means possible, he wished for Achilles to take them from the humiliation to come.

In return for his selflessness, he was loved by the girl. Even offering him a child she could bare, knowing full well that she wont be the apple of his eye. But Patroclus could not dirty her like that. He knew she deserved better.

Thetis, on the other hand, had loathed him since the beginning. Yet she unknowingly seeked comfort from his memories of her lost child. Never to truly knowing the boy she had given birth to but only from the words of his lover. Patroclus was at her mercy, begging to reunite with his lover and yet instead of hating her even until death, he sang her Achilles' song.

And with the last hymns of his memory, she obliged writing his name beside her child's. The only motherly thing she had ever done.

Patroclus was the best of the Myrmidons for his sheer kindness alone. The cowardice that was bestowed by his true father was a lie but the name 'Patroclus' that meant glory of the father was true. Chiron is proud of his child. He honored him, using the knowledge he had bestowed and saved dozens of lives of hardened greek soldiers. Memorizing their names and each of their stories like his father did. Although, unlike them, he did not fight with swords and spears, he fought with his empathy in hand.

And the boy he had accidentally killed as a prince? It was not an act of cowardice of his confession, it was atonement. Acceptance of what he had done. Unlike those other kings and princes, he took the punishment as one should supposed to.

And that is why Achilles loved him. And that's why Achilles died when he did. Because he is the mortal half of his supposed to be godhood.

He is his other half, as the poet say.

#the song of achilles #song of achilles #patroclus #patrochilles #achilles #tsoa #thetis #briseis #writing analysis #idk I pulled this out of my ass but Patroclus treats women really well unlike the other greek characters #when he saved briseis through achilles I just felt so amazed by his actions #as someone who has been assaulted the huge relief I had when he did that #and when he bedded deidameia because she wanted it after her hysteria didnt feel forced or anything in some sense #it was just out of pure sympathy really although #I guess its also cheating but then again it is a diff culture at that time too lol #i just see it as a symbolism of his actions ngl #pls dont fight me hahaha I am too tender #I just want to give Patroclus some credit with how low he sees himself

[the-sleep-paralysis-demon]

Six Splits For Four New Character Prediction

Spoilers for Chapter 1 & 2 and Spilt into Threes below cut

@shygirl4991 @alianarepasa (Notice me senpai /j)

Alright so we know three of the six so far:

Producer (Insecurity and Need to be perfect)

Ringmaster (Ego and Imagination)

Artist (Creativity and Humor)

And we have a hint at our fourth with the final paragraph of Chapter 2

From this introduction we know a few things about them as a character.

They call SMG3 a “fair maiden” which shows us their perception of the pairs relationship.

Fair maiden is often used in fictional works to describe a woman that could be described as “perfect” so the use of fair maiden shows they see 3 in an incredibly positive way.

Fair maiden can also describe the damsel in distress archetype. This archetype represents a helpless character in need of saving by (usually) the hero archetype. In fairy tales, this hero is usually a prince or knight and a romantic interest.

Through some logical backtracking, if SMG3 (the damsel in distress) is saved by our fourth SMG4 split, then the forth split sees himself as the hero aka either a prince or a knight.

I believe that our fourth split is Prince4. My biggest piece of evidence comes from the art from the fic.

We have a sneak peek of this mysterious split. And there hat/crown has the letters “PR”, which can represent Prince, as every SMG4 split has letters on there hat representing there name (R for Ringmaster, A for Artist, PD for Producer)

Going back to the romance part of our analysis, we see a small peak of there outfit in the fanfics cover art

Not only does it show a knight like outfit, reaffirming the idea of him being a hero archetype, but he seems to be holding something in his teeth which I outlined below:

Going off of our previous assumption of being a romantic interest, we can safely assume that this is a rose.

Roses being held in ones teeth is a classic romantic move which further backs up not only the romantic side but also backs up his code name.

We can safely assume that Red Caine is Ringmaster (Has a cane and is a reference to Caine from TADC) and Purple Slab is Artist (Slab often is used to describe materials used in art). Since the colors all follow the SMG4 splits color schemes then we know that Prince4 (white) has to be White Roman.

But how does White Roman confirm the rose and vice verses? Historians believe the rose between the teeth originated from Ancient Greek and Rome. So in the code name Roman represents the rose in his teeth which represents the romance element of his personality.

My conclusion?

I predict the fourth SMG4 split is called Prince4 and represents Fours heroism and romantic feelings.

#Becoming sherlock homes over here #I’m still trying to figure out the last two #If I do I’m posting them #six splits for fours #split into threes #fanfiction #smg4 fanfic #smg34 fanfiction #predictions #analysis #writing analysis #smg34 #smg4 #smg3 #smg4 smg3

[katapotato55]

Undertale analysis: Chara was a bad person but not because they were an "evil serial killer child" like the fandom portrays.

TW: mentions of mental illness, self harm, and suicide. SPOILER FOR UNDERTALE. yes this game is 8 years old and scarily popular, but its still worth playing! its 10 bucks on steam! get it! Post also contains stupid edits I made to ENHANCE your experience by at least 50% guaranteed or your money back (post cost $0)

first: some backstory. I played Undertale way back in like, 2016 when the game was still fresh yet gaining popularity quickly. The fandom soon after became criminally insane and went on a moral panic where people were harassed for "playing the game wrong". I remember stories of youtubers cancelling Undertale let's plays because they would kill a character and people would get upset. other than AUs, the biggest thing that stuck out to me was the strange obsession with claiming Chara is an evil demon child who is the root of all evil and eats puppies and enjoys drinking the blood of the innocent. and then counter-culture made it so that chara is actually innocent and that the PLAYER is the horrible evil monster eating puppies etc etc.

two extremes that i half-agree with, but mostly disagree with. There was an INSANE black and white mentality that flooded the Undertale space with no breathing room for mistakes. nowadays people have matured and the fandom calmed down, so now would be a great time to explain why i think Chara is a more complex character than people give them credit for. please don't hurt me.

1- Chara very much had mental health issues.

and not in the horror movie way where they were a caraaazay evil serial murderer

a huge misconception is that people assumed the garden tools in toriel's house being dulled was somehow "proof" that Chara was an evil serial murder or something.

though... I think people also forget Chara heavily hinted at struggling with serious depression and misanthropic tendencies.

Chara climbed the mountain to end their own life. the reason the garden tools were dulled wasn't because the Dreemurs were trying to protect other people from Chara, they were trying to protect Chara from themself. it baffles me how a lot of people didn't catch onto that. It could be that we were young teens and didn't know better... but i digress! "but kat? how is Chara a bad person ? are you saying people with depression are-" get that objectively wrong idea out of your head. Having a mental illness does not make you a bad person. If you struggle with suicidal thoughts please get help from loved ones and don't EVER think you are a bad person for struggling. no. chara is a bad person because...

2- Chara was a bitter misanthrope that didn't care about anyone else or their feelings.

there are several lines of dialogue that point to the fact Chara did not like humans. There is a high probability that Chara had a hard home life before falling to the underground and that is possibly why Chara was the way they were. I am not going to send you a million screenshots as to every single bit of evidence of this, I am not made of time and jpegs. (besides i spent the entire budget on photoshop edits) I am however, going to send you the most damning evidence on my side: the true lab tapes. In the pacifist run, you can visit the true lab and find Asgore and Toriel's old home videos. The tapes basically showcase Chara's plan to Asriel where they were to eat the butterscotch flowers, and then Asriel will absorb their soul when they died.

you can watch this youtube video on all of the true lab tapes. to recap the story, Chara died, Asriel absorbed the soul, took Chara's body to the human village and then the humans thought Asriel killed Chara. Asriel refused to fight, walked back to their home and died in the flowerbed. Later on if you talk to Asriel, He mentions he wasn't the one who went to the human village, but it was Chara that was controlling him. He refused to hurt the humans and fight back and essentially they were both taken down. so here are my thoughts (please remember this is my interpretation you are OK to disagree with me)

-Chara probably just used the freedom of the monsters as an excuse to off themselves, Then put that emotional responsibility on Asriel. -They then USED Asriel's body to try and enact revenge on the humans in their death as some kind of messed up murder-suicide but in the wrong order -This ends up Killing Asriel, then he later became a bitter misanthropic husk after being reincarnated by Flowey. Possibly due to the trauma. -This ends up putting the ENTIRE underground in a depressed state with no hope and causing a massive war with the humans -their adopted parents are now divorced due to this tragedy and both Toriel and Asgore started to have conflicting issues on the topic of humans -Asgore basically trapping everyone with him in his own grief because he didn't want to actually face what happened and played the long game collecting souls one by one. -Toriel struggling to move on and essentially trying to mother any human that falls down without facing her demons. -Litterally all of undertale happened. essentially Chara was not a bad person because they were a child version of Jason Voorhees Chara was a bad person because they manipulated their family into having emotional responsibility for their self-inflicted death and hatred of humanity. They made their issues everyone else's problem and didn't consider how their horrible actions would affect others. and in a way, that is one of the morals of Undertale If you don't care about others and how your actions will affect others, then you would be making the world a shitty place in the end. Lets get back to that thing I said earlier about fans harassing other players for little mistakes. killed Toriel on your first play through ? congratulations! you are a horrible irredeemable person who deserves to get death threats ! /s God forbid we have nuance and acknowledge that most players at this point feel BAD about what happened since this is their first play through! And that they CARE about what they did to their new friend! These kind of people ignore the fact that the issue with the genocide run wasn't just the deaths, but that the player didn't consider how the monsters felt after you just ripped away their happy ending. which is the mentality that both Chara and Flowey had.

here is a video i recommend. to quote this video about the sans fight: "They call out the player not for acting immorally but for acting with no moral guidance whatsoever. Flipping back and forth between good and evil for no real reason except that they want to see what happens. In the boss’s own words, committing genocide “because you think you can, and because you can, you have to.” " Chara offed themself and made Asriel emotionally responsible for Chara's fucked up revenge fantasy without considering others feelings The player restarted the timeline (more than likely the good ending) to kill everyone all for the reason of curiosity without considering others feelings. the reason why Chara goes after you at the end of the genocide run is because you basically VALIDATED the deep dark desires of a mentally damaged person and made them watch their loved ones get ritualistically murdered. meanwhile in the pacifist run (with no history of the genocide path on your file), you simply let Chara remain as they were when they passed away. You didn't validate their dark mentally unstable desires, you simply shown Chara that the world isn't a horrible place and that actually caring about other people leads to a better life. If you HAVE played genocide before the pacifist ending, then the lesson does not sit because you still basically led them down a dark path in the end. By caring about how others feel and the impact you leave on people, you are helping retain hope for a better future for everyone, and that is one of the many reasons why i love Undertale.

thank you for reading this massively long analysis, it took me a lot of time and effort to get this put together.

#Youtube #undertale #undertale chara #undertale asriel #asriel dremuur #asgore #toriel #undertale theory #gaming #video games #pc gaming #videogame #games #writing analysis #meta analysis #media analysis #analysis #character analysis #zero punctuation #undertale analysis #theory #speculation #undertale memes

[42starsintheuniverse]

Obsessed with Zuko falling ill after he lets Appa go, people rag on him but... What if Zuko has just been fighting off a cold for days, and then when he lets Appa go a part of him is just like "Bro, we can't live like this." And he keels over.

Zuko lets himself rest for half a second, and the plague is like "Excellent choice sir, we will descend on you immediately."

#atla #zuko #season 2 #zuko sick boy #writing analysis

[minu-moni]

What I think is interesting to analyze when looking into a character portrayal is to notice how the author influences in the character’s actions.

Let’s compare Gamzee to Jevil, from Deltarune.

Both characters are essentially “character who came in contact with someone that gave them more knowledge than they could handle and they went insane because of it” but how Hussie and Toby run with this idea is majorly different.

While Hussie writes Gamzee to be an irredeemable monster, an abuser and overall a shitty person, Toby goes the other way with Jevil.

Throughout Deltarune’s chapter one if you’re going to do the hidden boss, you get some information from Seam about Jevil. He speaks about Jevil mostly with caution, but he never villainizes him. And while Jevil is implied to have hurt people, so much so that he had to be locked up, Seam never treats him as a villain. He treats him as an old friend and even speaks fondly of him after you beat his fight. There is no instance where Toby writes Jevil to be inherently evil, abusive or a shitty person overall, and the fandom mostly sees him on a positive light.

Gamzee however, is the opposite. His encounter with Lil Cal turns him into a villain with no redeeming qualities and strips him of any personality and nuance to the point he doesn’t even speak. He is also retconned to always have been an asshole and then Hussie goes out of his way to villainize him and treat his situation as something that turned him into a villain, instead of a character with flaws who was manipulated and used in some way.

And how does the fandom treat Gamzee? They absolutely despise him. There’s a pretty vocal bunch in the Homestuck fandom that thinks Gamzee is just a shitty person who chose to serve Lord English and kill all his friends, and part of this is because of how he’s portrayed in the comic.

Let’s not also forget about how Gamzee is written as neurodivergent and black-coded, while those characteristics are missing in Jevil’s character (at least in any major way). And while maybe not intentional, I absolutely believe that this influenced Hussie’s way of writing Gamzee. There’s too many influences of this to not be so.

People, specifically people of color and disabled people, have said this for a long time now, but this discussion goes unaddressed and recognized by the part of the fandom that hates Gamzee, which downplays these concerns, and Hussie, who doesn’t address them at all and even makes fun of people for thinking of Gamzee with more nuance on the epilogues.

Comparing those two characters and the way they’re written, we can see that it’s clearly an author problem. Hussie writes Gamzee so poorly that people have actually found instances of possible racism and ableism in him, meanwhile there’s way less of an issue with Jevil, who is written as nuanced and the fandom absolutely loves him for it.

Y’all need to stop talking about characters like they actually chose what they did. They’re not real. Someone wrote them to act the way they do. They’re not independent, they’re not conscientious, they don’t choose anything. It’s the author that chooses what they will do, and their biases absolutely influences the writing of such.

#deltarune #homestuck #gamzee makara #Jevil #writing analysis #moni speaks

[goldsrc-hl1]

RWBY Writing Analysis Number One - Roman Torchwick's death and why it's so good

Hello all.

Roman Torchwick, the glorious bastard of RWBY, is by far my favorite villain in the entire show.

A smooth talking criminal with a sense of humor, a perfect foil to Ruby, and a character who's impact lasts all the way to the present volume. He's got humor, consistent writing, and one hell of a sense of style.

But one thing I've seen many people complain about is his death scene. Many have claimed that it's unsatisfying. I disagree wholeheartedly, as there is a LOT of nuance and messaging behind the way Roman Torchwick dies.

Let's talk about it!

Roman's motivation

First thing's first, let's establish Roman's modus operandi. We can identify his main goal and his motive from a few lines in Volume 3 Episode 11, Heroes and Monsters.

Roman: You're asking the wrong questions, Red! It's not what I have to gain, it's that I can't afford to lose!

Roman: I may be a gambling man, but even I know that there are some bets you just don't take.

Roman: Like it or not, the people that hired me are going to change the world! You can't stop 'em, I can't stop 'em!

Roman: You know the old saying, "If you can't beat 'em-"

He gets cut off, but the "old saying" he's referring to is "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em"

Roman's goal is to survive. He'll do whatever it takes to survive, no matter how morally black. Nothing is off limits as long as it keeps him alive.

The writers want to prove his modus operandi / philosophy (being that he'll do whatever it takes to survive) wrong.

Roman's death

Throughout the first 3 volumes of RWBY, Roman aids Cinder Fall in her plan to take down Beacon Academy. This involves hijacking an Atlesian airship and shooting down two other airships, the whole train bomb stuff at the end of Volume 2, providing the White Fang with Atlesian military technology, and stealing dust en masse.

Ultimately, it's him working with Cinder Fall that gets him killed. He helps Cinder with her plan, helps her wreak havoc in Vale all in the name of survival, and how does it end up for him? He is killed by the very Grimm that Cinder herself had unleashed on Vale.

He did everything it took to survive, no matter the cost, and it ended up getting him killed. All that talk about "if you can't beat them, join them" ended up being the very thing that gets him killed. It's ironic, really, and it proves his philosophy wrong.

The Real World

Another facet of Roman's final moments is his last monologue to Ruby.

Roman: You got spirit, Red. But this is the real world!

Roman: The real world is cold!

Roman: The real world doesn't care about spirit!

Roman: You wanna be a hero!? Then play the part and die like every other Huntsman in history!

Roman: As for me, I'll do what I do best: lie, steal, cheat, and SURVIVE!

Although the writers wanted to prove his philosophy of doing whatever it takes to survive wrong, they want to prove him right in this respect - the real world is cold, and the real world doesn't care about spirit.

Despite what he says about spirit, he also has spirit himself. That spirit isn't spent on making the world a better place, however, it's spent on his own survival. And, despite all that effort to survive, he dies a pitiful death at the hands of the very Grimm he helped unleash on Vale.

The world didn't give him a satisfying death. The real world doesn't care that he's a major villain. The real world is cold, and doesn't care about spirit. Roman's death proves him right.

However, that shouldn't stop you from doing the right thing. Roman knows the world is cold, and doesn't care about it. He only cares about himself and Neo's survival.

Ruby, on the other hand, learns that the real world is cold after the Fall of Beacon, in no small part due to Roman Torchwick. However, unlike Roman, she doesn't let this stop her from still doing the right thing.

"that's why we're here, to make it better"

So yeah. To all who say Roman's death is unsatisfying, take a read.

#rwby writing is actually pretty damn good #rwby analysis #rwby #anti rwde #roman torchwick #ruby rose #writing analysis

[brabblesblog]

Hi!!! This might be a super obvious answer to most but I saw your post about Astarion characterization (10/10 btw) and you said you use a mental construct of AA for writing/beta? I have not stopped thinking about this, it's fascinating to me- can you explain that more in depth? I feel like I might do a similar thing whenever I write but I'm not sure I understand it, so I would love if you could clarify/talk about how/why and all that (if you're comfy with it, of course!)

Hi! This is a very good (and relevant) question nowadays, and I realize I didn't expound clearly about this method in my characterization post.

So this method is likely to be uncommon. My beta does not do this, nor do any of the other great writers in the fandom I've encountered. More of them sort of get into the character's headspace.

EDIT: Apparently so does @pursuitseternal! OMG ILY now I know why we're both on the same brainwave LOLOL What I do have, is a sort of imaginary friend, if you will. An AA, lounging around in his throne inside my head. When I write, I will look to him and wait for the message I want to impart to be spoken from his mouth, in his voice. If it sounds weird, or off, then I know that I need to tweak the line, and do so, then let him reread. For spawn (when I beta, and when/if I ever write for spawn), what I do is dress him up in clothes that are distinctly spawn (so either origin armor, or epilogue out fit) and then let him do the same thing, asking him to consciously act like spawn.

The reason why Ascendant dialogue is easier for me to kind of figure out is because I have been writing Ascendant stuff for quite some time know so it's kind of stuck. But this also works for other than dialogue. I try to figure out whether he would do something. This helps with small character moments that flesh him out further; for example in a yet unpublished piece of work I actually have him reconsider sitting on a chair because it's dirty. To get that like idea I just imagine him in a dingy location, with chair in question. Would he sit? Would he sort of refuse, because no way are his expensive clothes getting fucked by whatever's on that chair? A lot of bringing a character to life, especially for fics that are heavily character driven are these tiny details, because they make them seem more real on page. I hope this answers your questions, and feel free to ask more.

#astarion #astarion baldurs gate #baldurs gate astarion #bg3 #bg3 astarion #astarion fic #astarion ancunin #astarion bg3 #bg3 fanfiction #astarion fanfiction #astarion analysis #ascended astarion x tav #writing analysis #bg3 analysis

[ghouljams]

winter weather is making me super soft and needy, even though I live alone 😭

could you share which excerpts in any of your pieces that mean a lot to you? could be just the writing itself or its significance to the story

Yes absolutely I can. This is going to get long I can just feel it lol

The entirety of "A Small Quiet Moment" for Cowboy!Ghost means a lot to me, I think it's an excellent moment in his story of growth. It's a solid healthy change. But more specifically: "There are no bullets flying at him here, no mercenaries to betray him, no bombs or end of the world scenarios. Just his boots, and his hat, and a well worn mask that he seems to wear more out of habit than necessity these days." Is just so *chef's kiss* to me. Like he's safe, and he's comfortable, and he's accepted that it's what's best for him.

In that same cowboy vein: "I could do it with you," he tells you, and your heart could burst at how soft and honest he sounds, "I'm better with you." Is my favorite line I've written for Ghost. It's so core to his story in the au, and it speaks volumes to just who he is as a person. He's someone that's always claimed to work better alone, but somehow always has a partner. I think about him telling jokes with Soap in MW2 and wonder if Ghost knows how desperately he wants to belong to someone. He gets that with Goose and he is truly better with her. "Better together" as they say in the baby fic.

Fae!Price and Witch's whole story is just near and dear to my heart but I do have pieces that I cherish above others, and things that I consider to be steps in their relationship that I don't think anyone else noticed.

There's a short exchange in "Testing the Threshold" that I particularly like:

"Why do you do that?" Price asks, and again you feel the threshold almost... part for him. It seems to thin at least. You'll have to fix that.

"Do what?"

"Disagree with me."

Which feels very much indicative of their relationship up to that point. Because it isn't just that Witch disagrees with him it's that she always disagrees with him, even when he's talking about her. He calls her overprotective and means it as a joke but she refutes it immediately. She's almost playful with him up to this point, she doesn't take him seriously and Price sort of realizes that here. He lets his smoke slip free, shows her that he can get his magic into the garden, that he's obeying her rules for her not himself. At the same time there's this sense that he knows she's disagreeing with him because she likes him, she's comfortable with him. IDK it's such a short fic but I have so many thoughts on it.

Then in the follow up fic we have more of Price begging Witch to realize he likes her:

“It shouldn’t do that,” You look up at him finally, moving closer to inspect the air between you, “Are you doing something to it?”

“What would I be doing?” He asks, and you don’t really have an answer for that. You hum, upset that you don’t know. “Come on smart girl,” Price mumbles, you shake your head.

That short "Come on smart girl" fucking KILLS ME. HE WANTS HER TO KNOW. He wants her to know that he's pushing her wards, that they're starting to let him through. He wants her to figure it out, she's smart, he knows she's smart. But it's again this sense from Witch that she doesn't see Price as a threat. And if he were smarter he'd see that as the compliment that it is. She likes him, even when she's warding against him she likes him. Her magic likes him, it wants him close. Witch's magic is always more honest than she is and it responds to her wishes even when she doesn't know what those are.

Also Price mentally calling Witch "wickedly clever" is just... god he's in love with her. Yet at the end of the fic he goes back to thinking with his dick, he can't fully conceptualize that he wants her more than just physically. He's never been in love before but it's there, his feelings shine through in every interaction with Witch.

This isn't exactly a fic quote but every Witch fic where she leans over and Price peaks down her shirt. Good great, she doesn't realize it the first few times but by the end she's doing it on purpose. IDK just that small appreciation from Price literally every time makes me giggle.

This line from "Invisible Claims": "He kisses you like it's special every time, like he'll never get another chance for it." Just drives me insane. Like fucking of course he does, of course Price grabs Witch every time like it'll be the last time. He's so far gone for her.

Last I'm going to grab something from fae!Ghost. Love giving him her last name that soft "you can take mine." Is so lovely to me. Just the unthinking care behind the gesture. The assurance, the claim over Ghost, the "it doesn't matter what happened in the past you're mine now" that it signifies. I feel like it says a lot about Love's character and that was before she was "named." That to me is where Ghost and Love are truly shown to be in love. It's not just obsession, it's not just codependency, they're truly in love. Much like Price with Witch, Love is offering to take Ghost's burden, she's offering him salvation and a fresh start. Here's her name, he can be something new, he can be something loved for the rest of his life.

Anyway there are my thoughts and faves. <3

#ghoul speaks #writing analysis #for my own dumbass fic no less #I have a million favorite things #The Price/Witch sex fic is my favorite too but I don't want to analyze that rn #too much to analyze lol