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ducknotinarow · 11 months

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03 RaphYvonne 🍷💖

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Raphael didn’t have a drinking problem it was far more he became a problem when he did drink well everyone else’s problem not so much to himself. In truth he should count himself lucky people put up with him when he did go just a tad to far on a drinking binge. And right now? He as the problem of his Twin brother and basically sister Yvonne. They might not be married but Raph had already saw her as part of the family heck if those two broke up? He would still see Yvoone as his sister. Which was good for him on both counts, his poor twin brother who made worrying a special skill and his ever kind heart sister being willing to find him when no one was sure where he landed up. Raphael recalled asking Casey to crash with him, Casey offered to get him bu he assured them he was fine to get there on his own. Raphael wasn’t all that far from their place anyway. Something he planned ahead of time just in case he did drink more than he maybe should, which often he did. Traveling the roof tops was a bit well risky, sure it meant it take the turtle longer to get to his boyfriend, but he didn’t need to add to Casey’s worries showing up a mess too. It was dark enough so if he stuck to the alleyways and such going by the streets would be fine too he’d just give Case a call when was outside so he could help him from there.

Only problem was Raph had no sense of direction when he got drunk, as he stumbled around holding a hand to the closet building for support. Working like a maze was it Don or Leo who told him that trick about doing that? He decided it was Donnie because he was pissed off with Leo at that moment. What should had only taken him ten minutes, twenty at the latest. Went on for hours streets got so mangled and twisted he got turned around so many times. Heard voices a time or two and needed to duck and hide which just made him go in the wrong direction. Honestly Raphael had no idea where he as anymore he stopped and tried to catch his bearings when he heard a familiar voice call his name suddenly turning to see Yvonne.

“Heeeeey!” He loudly calls out waving his arm in the air in truth glad to see someone he knew not fully aware what she was saying when he let himself wobble over towards her arm thrown over a shoulder in need of the support he nods as if he heard what she was saying. When he lifted his head to speak he paused and looked across the way. Eyes narrowing as he tried to focus “I think ‘hat Crees checkin’ ya out Von.”

That was sort of the last thing he recalls before being at Vons place now with her and Don. Soon as they got him inside he just fall on to the floor. Uninjuried as he laid like so trying to get his head to stop spinning. Confused because he swore he was heading to Casey's? He slowly rolled to rest on his shell man he felt like time was skipping on him was he blacking out?

The world felt like it was spinning, or maybe Raphael was spinning? Nah that don’t make sense he sure of that because he’s laying flat on the floor of Von’s place so he can’t be spinning clearly. Right? Brow slowly furrowed as he tried to make sense of his line of thought in that moment, this was nothing new Raphael drunk to a point he couldn’t use his brain. Not much loss there he didn’t use it all that much in the first place after all Raph moved to lift himself up to try and sit best he could but that wasn’t proving to be a good choice as he felt his head go light suddenly, leaning over to grab on to the couch where Von was sitting still seeming to be talking to someone? Jeez his vision was nothing but a blur he might have drank more than he should have. Raph was in for a harsh morning that’s for sure.

Heading turning a little when eyeing his brother Donnie who didn’t seem all to amused right now, not mad either more annoyed. Raphael only catching every maybe fifth rod coming out from his brothers beak as they turned to look towards Raph now. A remark about him being awake being made that Raph just shrugs off.

“Hard to believe when all ya crap bores me to death” he snickers very maturely after to himself mostly “blah blah don’ drink so much and blah blah somethin’ ‘bout not runnin’ round tryin’ ya start stuff with the guy making weird looks at Von here.” That wasn’t exactly what happened it was just some mascot cardboard cut out that sat outside the drive through of some burger place not to far from the docks. But to a drunk turtle? It was a guy trying to pick up on his sister, Don’s girlfriend. Cause quite a scene when the night shift team working the place found a mutant turtle fighting with the cut out. “Don’ see why ya mad Don, fine next time ‘lol jus’ lets the guy eyein ya girl get her number too.” He huffs a bit annoyed at Donatello with not justified reasoning in the least.

Well he grumbles something incoherently against the fabric of the couch. Mostly along the lines of how ungrateful Donnie was for Raph having his back clearly. And, that he liked Von better than Donatello in this moment because at least she wasn’t being a jerk to him like Donatello was. Yes very mature of the red banded turtle. H’es should count himself lucky Von and Don were near by when he was off and about drunken wandering around the city as he had been. Raph just needed to blow off some steam after another one and his and Leo’s famous arguments broke out but, sometimes Leo’s word stung and well alcohol numbed those stings in him. But one drink was always quick to turn into far more that Raph soon lost count, he meant to go to Casey even called to ask if that be fine but guess he miss judge the trip before winding up found by Von and Don. He was compliant in going with them till he saw that stupid looking chef eyeing up Yvonne and right in front of Donnie? Pfft what he was just meant to let it go? Well clearly seeing how it was just a cardboard cut out. Raph ignored that bit even after he realized it after ripping it’s head off. Still didn’t stop the drunk idiot from mumbling that he liked Von better.

“gonna call her Vonnie now,” Raph speaks up with suddenly as he lifts up his head and yells at Don “ Ya ‘hat’s ‘ight you lose your nickname now Donatello cause ya wanna be a big dumb jerk!” Raph managed to make his legs work to get himself to climb up on the couch so he could sit next to Von. Throwing an arm over her shoulders as he casually pulls her over his way and away from Donatello extra measures even given as he scoots to the other end of the couch with her.

“Actually ya don’ get Von at all either, cause ya let anyone flirt with her, and then act ‘ike a big ol’ jerk when I try and have ya back ‘bout it. So no more Vonnie for you lost ya rights.” As if Raphael had like any power to make these claims sticking his tongue out as his brother though because yes clearly Raphael did have the power to make these claims. Yvonne didn’t seem all to bothered by his antics which he took as a good sign. “Side’s I found her first anyway.”

Okay no where was Raphael going with this? Sure that as true Raph was the one spying on Bishop that night when he saw them with Yvonne that night they met and was in a sense the one to introduce them. Though actually Mikey did that bit when she came to the lair but eh that was splitting hairs at that point. But that aside clearly the drunk has some thought going through his skull right now. Leaning back a bit to shift attention towards Yvonne over his twin more putting him on full ignore in this moment. Didn’t care for the looks they aimed his way or whatever he was saying easily brushing them off without a single care.

“Ya know Vonnie if I had a nickel every time I saw someone as pretty as you, ‘d have five cents.” He casually remarks on, hey Raphael wasn’t gay he was in fact attracted to both guys and gals. Honestly, he never understood why was it girls an guys were both so hot to him? Yeah sure he leaned more towards men cause well they were more his speed he just got along with guys a tad more seeing how he was a tough guy and all he liked the excuse of picking fights with good looking gays. But that didn’t mean he was unaware or blind to a women’s good looks. And yeah that meant Yvonne. Who was objectively pretty not his type but hey he knew a pretty face when he saw one.

“I ain’t good at holding conversation like big mouth” He says gesturing over to Donatello “an’ sure he has talked ya ears ‘ight off ya more ‘Han once been there I get it. But would it be okay if I held ya hand instead? Mean got four of ‘em even.”

Thankfully even drunk Raph can’t keep his face straight as he starts to laugh letting his face fall into the couch as his shoulder shake, it was Von after all even drunk he knows that much at least. Beside he had Casey all he was doing was trying to piss Don off.

“Sorry Von I ain’t serious” he laughs even more to himself as he lifts up his face and moves to sit on the other side of Yvonne “But Don still can’ have ya cause he’s a big dumb jerk, so shoo go back to lair. Von’s my friend so ya can’ hang out with her anymore.”

#muse| hamato donatello #madamkezzie #aflockoffeathers #[ ones trash is anothers treasure aflockoffeathers]#[ you think first i hit first aflockoffeathers]#drunk flirting meme #meme answers #ic reply #stay queued #tw: alchohol mention #tw: alcholism #((Donnie I’m sorry you have t deal with your twin acting like a complete child to you right now when your trying to look out for him XD))#((Von normally drunk with him so ya know she gets to deal with him to but least she can laugh it off pfft XD))#((nickels are five cents so yeah he called her pretty again uwu))

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ghostlythunderbird · 1 year

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The Pack ~ The Letter

Pairings: Alpha!Konig, Alpha!Simon “Ghost” Riley, Alpha!Keegan P. Russ X Omega!Fem!Reader

Warnings: 18+ Minors/Ageless Blogs DNI, Omegaverse, Mentions of Anxiety/Panic attack, Ghost and Keegan are kinda mean for this one (Im sorry!), Konig being a big softie for Reader, Mostly Fluff for this one!

Words: 4,437 (Went a little too wild with this one!)

Author’s Notes: Please do not repost, edit, or translate my work. This blog and all content will be marked 18+ even if there is no NSFW content, if you are underage or have no age I don't want to deal with you. So sorry for the long time to update, I'm currently recouping after my hand surgery so ill try and update when I can, it sucks trying to write with one hand XD.

Summary: After being introduced to your new pack, you are taken to your new home or 'Den' at this point. While the introduction part went almost seamlessly, your starting to figure out that these alphas might be a little hard to get along with.

The drive home was nothing less than silent; aside from König sitting in the back seat with you, the two other alphas were quiet. 'Maybe they are the strong silent type.' You had told yourself. While you wanted to ask anything about themselves, you had a strong feeling that you would be told to be quiet by these alphas.

Close to an hour later, the car had come to pull into a short driveway. Looking out the window, the house itself was decent from the outside. A standard brick suburban house, copied and pasted much like many others on both sides of the street. The red bricks and white paneling nearly blinded you as you stared at it. Before you could ponder more on the look of your new 'home' the door on your side opened, The Alpha known as Ghost stood there "Come on, out ya get."

Sliding out of the vehicle you were snatched up by König who gently guided you up the steps to the front door. "Don't worry about your stuff right now, Schatz. We will get it later." Without another word, the front door was finally opened.

Your new home was lackluster; if you googled a Bachelor pad, this would be the definition of one. While there was furniture, it didn't feel as homey as you had expected. The living room was bare other than the oversized L-shaped couch and T.V. stand it faced. Hell, these guys didn't even have a fucking coffee table, of all things. As you further overlooked the room, you noticed the bare white walls. No different colored paint, picture frames, or calendar was hung up.

Just an empty minimalistic house. Perfect for three military bachelors.

As you stepped through the front door, you nearly lost your breath after the mix of alphas scents. The overall musk almost sent you to your knees, through the overbearing scent hints of Cinnamon, Vanilla, Mint, Smoke, and Leather blended in almost perfectly.

Minutes passed as you regained yourself before you looked back towards the door to find König waiting for you to continue. "Are you okay, Schatz?" His voice was soft as he began to approach you. While you knew his second gender and the horror stories your family had told you growing up, none seemed to fit his character. His sheer size alone would make anyone panic if he approached, but with him nervously clutching his hands to soothe his anxiety. It made him appear much less intimidating and rough around the edges, reminding you more of a large shelter dog being welcomed into a new house for the first time. He wanted you to accept his home, his den, as somewhere you would feel comfortable and safe.

From Konig's point of view, None of this seemed real to him.

In two weeks, König went from a pack-less and omega-less Apex to not just having his own pack but an omega that he could protect and care for. Everything was a mirage that could disappear should he touch it. But seeing you here before him, nothing less of a goddess, made it much more believable. "If you two are going to have an emotional moment, at least move out of the fucking doorway so people can get into the damn house." Ghost growled out as he passed both of you. Keegan followed close behind, but unlike Ghost, he gave you a blank stare as he passed.

Looking down towards you, König felt his anxiety rear its head. Your face had fallen and a sour tone began to line your once relaxing scent. as you watched the two alphas walk away from the door.

As wordlessly they came in, they disappeared up the stairs to their shared room. This brought König to sigh heavily as he looked down at you again. "Don't worry, Schatz. They will warm up to you……eventually" He wasn't sure if he was telling you this or trying to reassure himself at the pair's attitude that one eighty once they were back in their den.

He didn't want you to feel they despised your existence as soon as you entered their lives. "Why don't we get you settled? I'm sure you're ready to rest." With the Apex mentioning this, your eyes lit up, and you couldn't help but smile at him. "Definitely; it seems like we all need a fat nap."

Both you and König laughed before he led you up the stairs. Reaching the next floor, he showed you where the single bathroom was and his, Ghost, and Keegan's bedrooms, just in case. At the end of the hallway was the final room. "This was Ghost's room originally, but once we were accepted, we all decided to leave one room open for you. So that you have your own space away from us." Upon opening the room, you were presented with one of the most enormous beds you'd ever seen. Resting on top were bags on bags of not just new nesting material. This ranged from thick fluffy comforters to sleek silk sheets; however, they lacked color.

It was a swirl of black and white with an underlying mix of grey.

It rendered you motionless as you took in the sheer amount, had these alphas gone out and bought you a whole nest and a half of material? You had never heard of alphas going to these lengths to make an omega comfortable. As you looked toward the Apex in the doorway, the anxiety in his posture was evident.

His hands were drawn up to his chest, clutching pieces of his shirt into his hands. He was even slouched forward to lower his overall height to match yours, even with it being impossible without him going to his knees.

"Well, I uh.....I'll leave you to get settled. Just call for us if you need anything." Without another word, the Apex left, closing the door behind him.

With that, you turned back to look at the covered bed before finally moving to clear off the excessive amount of nesting material lumped together. What you thought was an easy 15-minute job turned into 45 simply because your omega was getting too far distracted by the number of gifts she was given.

'Soft and Secure. Alphas are perfect, bringing nice gifts for a nest. The perfect nest for Alpha's pups.' She yipped. You were startled back to reality, god you haven't even known these alphas for a whole day, and suddenly, your omega is presenting herself, begging to be bred by these practical strangers. 'Jesus, you need to focus' Shacking your head to rid your mind of the intrusive thoughts, you attempted to finish your task.

Why would your omega be so enamored even after how the other two alphas seemed to want nothing to do with you?

Once all the material was put away for the time being, you had a yawn slip from your mouth. How long have you been up today? It was well over 14 hours at this point. Why not take a quick break. Deciding to rest, you had walked towards the sorted assortment of nesting materials before you settled on one of the larger and softer blankets. The void color overtook your view as you pulled it from its packaging.

'So soft,' You tiredly thought. After making it onto the bed and ensuring the blanket fully covers you, you finally lay down. Letting the bed hold the weight of your body.

It was quiet as you brought the blanket further up your chin. The only audible noise in the room was the sound of the ceiling fan. You hadn't realized how mentally exhausted you were from the entirety of not just today but the past few weeks. Each blink drew slower and slower until your vision went black, and your mind drifted to dreamless slumber.

~~~~~Flashback~~~~~

The sound of the T.V. did so little to drown out König's thoughts; König primarily spent the little time he had away from his rather dangerous occupation thinking about the 'What ifs' of his life. He was so caught in his thoughts he didn't realize Ghost had come back into the house, his hands full with mail. Most were bills, but one was large and thick compared to the rest.

Ghost placed all the envelopes on the counter before sorting them; the largest was addressed to König. From the Alpha Pack Selection Program. Something that the resident Apex had waited for close to 4 weeks for a response, one that hopefully bared good news. "König." His gruff voice echoed out.

Being pulled from his overreactive mind, the Apex leaned slightly to look at the other Alpha. The manilla folder being held transformed into a brightly lit target to the Austrian sprawled out on the couch.

The large man lunged off the couch, startling the smaller Alpha, who had just descended the stairs. "Jesus, König, a bit of a fucking warning." Keegan couldn't help but snarl after nearly getting run over by the Apex. It was rare for these sorts of incidents to happen in the house; the two alphas and the Apex were incredibly aware of where each was and their schedules.

König was zeroed entirely in on the envelope in Ghost's hand, while he may have been eager to receive this letter. He couldn't help but fear their answer; after their last response, it would make seven rejections from the program. Each time was for the same reason "Due to your Apex representation, we regretfully have to decline your enrollment to our program." But it still didn't stop him from taking it and tore the envelope open. "well, come on mate, what does it say?" Ghost nudged his arm; the Apex hadn't realized that Ghost had even rounded the corner to stand beside him.

König took in a deep breath before releasing as he unfolded the papers to read the words printed onto the paper.

Dear Applicant,

It has come to our attention that you have sent multiple applications over the last few years. Each one followed with a swift rejection from our programs as your representation would cause an upset in both our application alphas who may be paired with you and in the omegas who could be assigned to your care.

While we appreciate the time and effort you have invested in becoming part of this program, we have concluded that we will no longer accept any future applications from you. However, with this harsh news, we will allow a new application with you, but you must have at least two other alphas willing to become paired with you in a pack.

This envelope contains four applications for alphas willing to work and be assigned to a shared omega. These applications are only viable for 30 days; afterward, we will no longer accept any attempts to pair you. As well as, all previous information you provided will be deleted from our database.

~ The Alpha Pack Selection Program council

The silence that surrounded the air of the Alphas was suffocating. Even with the tv playing in the background, it was drowned out by the tense atmosphere. König felt like he couldn't breathe; until a sob forced its way out, and air seemed to flood his lungs again. How was he supposed to find someone willing to pack with him? and within 30 days? No one wanted to be stuck with him, and he hardly knew any other Alphas outside his work. And those he did work with? Most were already packed or swore off mating altogether.

This was it, his final chance to be accepted. With no potential pack-mates, he would lose his only chance of finding a mate and having pups. The world wanted him to live the rest of his life, never knowing the sweet touch of the omega for which he would lay down his life. To never know the feeling of pure happiness looking at a pup made from his omega and himself. A piece of him that he helped create.

Why? Why. Why. Why. WHY.

He hadn't realized that he was beginning to have a panic attack until Ghost dug his fingers into his shoulder. König could feel his body trembling, rolling off in waves, making his balance waver. "König, mate, you need to breathe," Ghost told him hushedly. Ghost and Keegan shared a look as the Apex slumped forward onto the counter, his head falling forward into his hands.

Steadying his breathing, König straightened his back and pushed the papers away as they burned him. While his day may have been uneventful, he wished he had never opened the damn letter now. The crushing weight that bared on his shoulders now seemed to grow heavier as the seconds passed. Looking at the stack of papers, Ghost couldn't help but look at the pages that caused König to damn near crumble before them.

The words spilled out before he made him sick. Why are they just now sending this? After all those years König spent trying to be accepted in this shitty program and getting rejected every time, they decide now to tell him what he needs to be accepted. Talk about hitting a man while he's down. Looking towards the dark-haired Alpha, leaning against the back of the couch, "Keegan, take a look at this fuckin' shit." While reading over the papers, the smaller Alpha couldn't believe the audacity of these fucking people. All this just because he was a slightly different second gender?

Casting a glance at the large Apex, who seemed to be on the verge of shutting down completely. While Keegan was a hardass, usually, he couldn't help but feel bad for his brother-in-arms. "So they are telling you to find a pack outside this program to be accepted? What a load of crap." His brain couldn't help but reel at the fact they were giving him only 30 days to figure this out; who could even help him now? He paused. Looking between Ghost and König, he knew what he was about to say would either be genius or he was about to be hit for. "What if Ghost and I pack with you?"

König and Ghost both wheeled around, both wearing surprised expressions. "The fuck are you on about? Did you hit your head on your last O.P.?" Ghost exclaimed as he stepped toward the smaller Alpha. "How are we the best options for a fuckin pack?" Keegan took a step backward as Ghost entered his space. 'Fuck, probably should have kept my mouth shut.'

Clearing his throat, "Think about it, Ghost, we're both unbonded alphas who know König the best; hell, we already live with him. And he needs a pack to be accepted. Why not throw us in and see where we go?" The air between them grew tense as the larger Alpha stared at him. "Right, and we're the best choices to take care of an omega; last I checked, neither of us have been around one." Ghost spoke through a tense jaw. As much as he was against being anywhere around an omega, he knew it was the best option between them.

König looked at them both. "A-are you guys sure? I know you guys aren't comfortable with this; I don't want you to force yourselves into this just because of me." The Apex was ecstatic to hear that they would try, but he knew he couldn't get his hopes up with this. There was still the possibility they would all be rejected.

"If this gets you into that program, I will push for it as much as possible." Keegan calmly stated. The Apex looked towards Ghost, who still looked unsure, giving him a kicked puppy look.

The blonde Alpha signed before giving König a look. "Alright, we'll give it a go. But if they reject us, this Program business stops. Are we clear on that?" König nodded ecstatically while Keegan released a deep chuff. The emotions swept over the Apex so much he didn't realize he had dragged Ghost into a bear hug. "GET OFF ME, YOU FUCKIN MUPPET; Keegan, help me out ere'!"

~~~~~~

After sending in the paperwork, they got their response two weeks later.

They were accepted.

König felt like he was about to pass out; everything was starting to work out. But it was only the beginning for the newly formed pack. Not only were they a pre-formed pack, but due to their extended military service, they were also notified that they could choose their omega. Hence the giant pile of files on the kitchen table.

It felt like they'd been at this for hours, passing the scent samples for each one to inhale. Each Alpha had the scent samples they liked, but when presented to the other two, it was met with a swift rejection and sometimes with a comment. While some omegas looked good on paper or had a decent scent, the Alphas couldn't agree.

"How about this one? She comes from a wealthy family in Italy, and it even says, 'She enjoys the finer things in life.'

"No, Keegan, It sounds like she'd be more of a glorified brat. Anyone born with a silver spoon in their mouth is nothing but trouble for people in our job."

Or it's a same-answer vote.

"Yeah fuck this one; smells like a Hospital."

"I'm going to have to agree with Ghost on this one. It reminds me of when my mom used so much cleaner in the house when I was a kid."

They thought this would be the easiest part, but they were definitely over their heads. Ghost finally stood up in a rage. "We've been sitting here for fuckin HOURS, and not a single one we have agreed on. Most of them smell like shite too." The Alpha raised his hands and walked to the fridge to grab another beer. KKönig stood as well at the other Alpha's tone. "No one said the selection was easy, and there's only a few left. Let's get through them, and then we can take a break." The Apex pleaded.

That only seemed to rile up the exasperated Alpha more "How the hell are we going to find an omega at this point? We can't agree on a single one?" Both alphas stared at each other "HOW DO YOU KNOW? WE ARENT EVEN DONE!"

Keegan watched as both alphas continued to argue; their conversation slowly was tuned out as he watched while resting his head in one hand. As much as he wanted to pipe up to aid König in calming Ghost down, He knew better than to get between these two during times like this. Before Keegan could intervene, a quick breeze of something sweet passed his nose, and the Alpha couldn't help but follow it back to the remaining folders. This scent was the best one he'd had all day, so he couldn't help but be curious.

It led him to a file towards the bottom that seemed much newer but was thinner than the other files in the stack. Once he opened it, the sweet scent was no longer teasing him. Taking the scent sample from the file, Keegan couldn't stop himself from pressing it to his nose and inhaling deeply.

It felt like he became weightless for those seconds; how had he not noticed this one earlier? It reminded him of the smell of fresh rainfall, a sweet yet calming scent. His Alpha couldn't help but be drawn to whoever the smell belonged to; without a second thought, Keegan pulled back from the cloth to look at the pages in the folder. Whoever's file this was about was the smallest one he had seen from the entire stack.

The picture attached gave him a view of the person that caught his Alpha’s attention.

You were stunning; His Alpha yipped in delight. ‘Yes, yes! Pretty mate! Must mate, Must protect!’

However, something felt wrong in the picture. Looking closer, the smile that graced your features didn't seem to reach your eyes. Your eyes held sadness and hidden anger that could reveal itself should you choose to snap. As his eyes flickered across the pages, Keegan stored everything he could about you away.

Omega Profile

Name: (Y/N) (L/N)

Age: 23

Sex: Female

Second Gender: Omega

Personality: N/A. Omega and Family declined to file the Omega Attribute survey.

The sickening sound of glass crack made Keegan snap his head upwards; the sight before him was far from good. Ghost and König stood only a few feet apart; the Apex and Alpha had their teeth bared and chests puffed up. Ghost was making his displeasure clear to the Apex while König was getting close to putting him back in his place among the three. It wasn't often it happened due to each other's work schedule, but when it did, someone was going to have their ego bruised, and some furniture might end up being broken.

“I highly recommend to watch what you say next, Simon.” The Apex spoke. His voice had dropped an octave; His Apex was close to taking over to deal with the Alpha. Ghost was silent before scoffing, moving to clean up his broken glass of bourbon. Keegan took this as his chance to break the tense air. “If you two are done with your pissing contest, I think I got one.” He slowly held up the small cloth between his index and middle fingers. As much as Keegan wanted to hoard the small cloth to himself, he needed to let at least his newfound packmates have a chance to decide if the omega was a good fit.

König was the only one who returned to the table to remove the cloth from Keegan’s hand. Lifting it towards his nose, he caught the scent almost immediately. It had him completely forgetting his altercation just minutes prior. “wow….I like this one; her scent is not overpowering and smells good. Simon, wanna try this one?” The Apex had turned back to the Alpha, who was leaning on the counter nursing a new glass of bourbon. The look in his eyes made Konig nervous; the Blonde Alpha was definitely over the whole experience, but seeing how both Keegan and König agreed on the scent patch, it seemed to be at least a contender.

Sighing, He set his drink on the counter before returning to the table. König slowly held the cloth towards him, but before he took it, he looked towards the two Alphas. “If this one smells like shite, I'm punching both of you.” Simon grumbled before snatching the small fabric. He stared at the cloth before finally giving in; as soon as the scent filled his nose, it was as if all the tension in his body had just melted away.

The other Alphas held their breath as they waited to see what the blonde alpha had to say. Simon looked at the pair as he set the cloth on the table near the open file. “Well, she doesn't smell bad. What's in her file?”

Keegan and König shared a look before handing Simon the file; It seemed they finally agreed on their potential omega.

~~~~~

The days counting down to them finally meeting you and bringing you home were absolutely hectic, to say the least. So many emotions filled the small townhouse as all three alphas cleaned and organized the house as best as they could, no omega should have a dirty home when they come home in the alpha's mind. Most were bouts of Anxiousness and Frustration, a vast majority were from the poor Apex who checked everything twice to make sure everything was perfect.

At the one-week mark Ghost and Keegan decided to move into the same room to make sure you have a space for yourself as you settled down. The move sparked from just the simple question "Where is our omega going to stay until she's warmed up to us?" To say it had the alphas taking multiple steps back was an understatement. Another thing that was brought up (By Ghost mind you) was what were you going to use should you decide to make a nest.

It may have not been something the Alphas were well versed in, but they at least made an effort. Cue the three alphas going out and buying almost two whole carts full of nesting material, plus the whole material selection boot camp.

"What about this one? It's big and it's super soft!" ~ König

"No no, She needs something that won't stick to her if she uses this for her heats. What about that silk sheet kinda stuff?" ~ Keegan

"Why not just get her some fucking blankets and pillows, This nesting shit can't be that complicated" ~ Ghost

It was definitely quite the scene watching these big alphas carry multiple bags worth of nesting material due to them being unsure what to get.

Once everything was settled, the day when they finally got to meet you arrived. The checking-in process was seamless, soon leading to the alphas being led to a smaller room waiting for the actual introduction. From what the receptionist had told them the Omegas family still needed to finalize paperwork, It had been the longest wait any of the alphas had ever done. But when the door finally opened to reveal the betas and you, time seemed to stand still.

They collectively decided they would die for you if it made you happy.

~~~~~

It had been a few hours since König had left your room. Call him paranoid, but no noise was coming from the door. Worried about you, he walked back to your door before knocking.

"(Y/N)? Is everything okay?" Hearing no response, he slowly opened the door and was greeted by a dimly lit room. And there on the bed, you laid completely still on the massive bed, sound asleep.

Once you walked in through that door, all his fears and worries seemed to implode and no longer existed. You were more than everything he could have dreamed of; how you weren't already paired was beyond him. You entangled him. Everything about you was beautiful, from your hair and eyes to your body. It wasn't until he had heard his name from downstairs that he was brought out of his trance.

He was casting you one last glance, taking in your sleeping form before turning to leave. König told himself he would make this work. Because now that he had you, He wasn't ever going to let you go.

Tag List: @silentmel, @thisperspective, @thebestgirlever2, @ghostalina, @pascallllllll1, @jujitsuito2069, @hypernovaxx, @frazie99, @v1naco, @littlezarp, @thatoneautor0123, @credince--writes, @4ndjelij4, @alonelyteenagebroncinbuck, @alonelyteenagebroncinbuck, @random0lover, @wintersnnowie, @operatorinvestigatesco, @marytvirgin, @nightriver99, @l-lend, @kelpiesummer, @quietlyignoringyou

#simon riley x reader #keegan russ x reader #konig x reader #cod ghost #konig cod #cod keegan #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x you #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley #konig x you #konig #konig mw2 #keegan russ #keegan p russ #omega reader #omegaverse #female reader

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bareee · 2 months

Text

New Armor

24 panels, AHHHHHH I love killin myself don’t I…

If boy hasn’t had new clothes in centuries, ya can’t tell me he’s had any other type of armor in that time ether. And Lae’zel practicin her people skills, with one of the hardest to deal with in camp, but none the less. She’s absolutely a take the hardest challenge first type of gal for sure

This has nothing to do to do with me wantin to draw easier armor for these peeps, nooooo I would neverrrrr… but leather armor does look so fun to doodle so yessss, and scalemail armor is so fun and was so much better for Karlach in the game. The Tanks get matching uniforms XD

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honeybubblebeeeeee · 4 months

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Breaking Up Slowly || Gojo Satoru x fem!reader

Gojo had broken up with you, for his own reasons but he still couldn’t stay away from you.

Part 2

You may read this and be like huh not realistic but i am writing this bec i was in this situation and it still got me messed up XD smut/hurt no comfort ://// (oral giving/receiving, penetration, creampie, nothing crazy) bad at writing smut bear with me

(also send requests! i appreciate them they help smmmm with writers block <3)

Your relationship with Satoru wasn’t ever a negative one. You two were compatible in all aspects. Your relationship was healthy. Until it wasn’t.

“I don’t understand! Just tell me what I did!” Tears were overflowing from your eyes as Satoru just stood at the door, a bag of his clothes over his shoulder. He couldn’t look at you even thought he was the one that ended things.

“It’s not you. I just don’t want a relationship anymore.” He looked to his feet and shifted uncomfortably.

You stared in disbelief. You had done nothing but give him everything. Anything he needed, you gave. You didn’t make a big deal when he was gone a long time and wouldn’t even answer his phone. You didn’t make a scene even when he was around and still needed space. You understood his job was hard. You didn't get mad at him when you hadn't seen him for weeks and when you finally did he didn't want to spend time with you.

“But why? Am I too much? Did I do something? Did I not do something?” You overthought every moment in an instant. You two had always talked when something was wrong. This is the first time there has been an issue and it wasn’t spoken about.

“No. I told you it’s not you. I just don’t want to be in a relationship. I have other things to focus on.” His blindfold masked any emotion that could be behind his eyes. It wasn’t often he wore it around you. So this felt like a punishment.

Taking in a breath you asked the hard question. “Are you seeing someone else?”

His head snapped to you and he took a step towards you but stopped himself from advancing further. “What? No. Of course not. I still want to be friends with you. I want to help you when you need it and….. and if you want we can still be, ya know, intimate.”

You scoffed at him. “You want nothing to do with me but you still want to have sex with me.”

Satoru sighed. “I still want you around. I just don’t want a relationship.”

Your heart felt like it was snapping in two. “Go. Get out.”

Satoru held out a hand. “Look Y/N, I-“

“Just go Gojo.” A flash of hurt crossed his face at your refusal to even use his name. He merely nodded at you and left.

. . .

A few days had gone by. Gojo had not spoken to you. You considered blocking his contact but it hurt too much. Part of you wanted him to take it back. To say he didn’t mean it and to come back. However part of you felt better with him gone. True feelings of how lonely you actually felt around him had risen to the surface now that you weren’t blinded by your love for him.

You were making your way to a hiking trail nearby your house when your phone started to ring. Pulling it out of your pocket, Gojo’s face lit up the screen. It felt like your heart was breaking all over again.

You considered not answering it but as the last ring started you accepted the call.

“Hello?”

“Hey! I just had to tell you this so I’m out with Yuji right. We were walking through the market and this curse comes out of nowhere. Sukuna and Yuji switch and apparently Sukuna knew the curse.” Gojo ranted on about whatever predicament he had been in. You were too stunned to say anything but oh, okay and force a laugh where it seemed appropriate. “So yeah I just thought it was so funny I had to call you to tell you.”

“Um yeah that is pretty funny.” Your mind spun. Did you imagine him breaking up with you?

“Anyway sorry to interrupt if you were busy. I just really wanted to tell you.” He sounded as if not a single aspect of this seemed wrong.

“I uh no. I wasn’t busy. I was just going to the trail by my apartment for a walk.” Through all his talking you had made it out of your apartment and almost to the trail.

“Oh really? I’m pretty close to there. I’ll come with you. I wouldn’t mind a walk. See you in a sec.” And with that he hung up.

You gaped at your phone. You almost wanted to call him back just to scream at him. You shook your head and kept walking, maybe he wouldn't be able to find you.

Just as you entered the trail, Gojo came up behind you. He smiled and waved, his dark sunglasses on. "Hey! It's nice out today huh?" You swallowed harshly and forced a smile at him. You walked in silence for a little while, Gojo's phone ringing broke the silence. "Oh sorry let me answer this." He walked away answering his phone, you stood there still in shock of how to even react to this entire situation. He was your ex-boyfriend now. So why was he acting like nothing ever happened?

He hung up and walked back towards you. "I have to go sorry but I'll catch up with you later?" He waved to you and made his way back in the direction you had both come from. You raised your hand weakly to wave to him.

. . .

A few weeks had gone by. Gojo hadn't spoken to you much. A few 'hey' and 'how are you' texts but they never went past a couple messages. Ironically it was him that was leaving you on read even though it was him who was texting you first. You hadn't physically seen him since that day in the woods.

It was late in the evening. You weren't tired but you didn't feel like doing anything in particular. In cases like this you resorted to weird hobbies at unconventional times, like baking at 11:00 pm. You had made a few batches of double chocolate chips cookies. One that had been your favourite and Gojo's. The man had a ridiculous sweet tooth and had always begged you to make them. You rarely had time to bake. It was one of those things you took for granted and regretted. If you had more time would he have stayed? Is that one of the reasons why he left?

Unsure what possessed you in the moment but you went for your phone and snapped a picture. Then sent it to him.

You: (Pic) i finally had time to make some more Gojo: ....are those the double chocolate chip ones that always stay super soft???!!! You: maybe Gojo: this physically pains me

You smiled at his silliness. You wanted to punch yourself for what you were about to do.

You: you could come by and have some i can even put some in a container for you to take home

He read the message and a few minutes had gone by. You cursed yourself. Gojo was your ex. Gojo broke up with you and here you were inviting him over cookies late at night. Smart. Real smart. You sighed ready to bask in your melancholy as your phone rang. Gojo was calling. You shouldn't answer right away right? Don't want to seem desperate... right?

"Hello?"

"I'm outside, buzz me in?"

You gaped for a moment before coming back to reality. "Oh right." You hung up and walked towards the pad by your front door, pressing the button, allowing him to enter the building. After a few minutes a knock sounded at the front door and of course you opened it to reveal Gojo. He had his black circle sunglasses on.

"Oh uh come in." Stepping out of the way to let him enter. Gojo slipped off his shoes and made his was to the kitchen. You shut the door quickly and followed him. He was practically drooling over the cookies. "Did you want a glass of milk or something?"

He turned to you. "Yeah but don't worry I'll get it. You sit."

You nodded as you leaned against the counter while he munched down the cookies in front of you. "These are so good. You always make the best treats." He leaned against the opposite counter across from you.

You two were really only an arms length apart from each other. You could reach over and pull off his glasses without even moving too much. "I'm glad you like them."

Gojo picked up another one. "You want one?"

"Sure" You shrugged and moved to reach for it but he moved faster and held it to you lips. You took a soft and tentative bite out of it. His sunglasses covered anything his eyes would reveal. He moved it away for a moment before feeding you the rest of it, then leaning back and simply watching you.

He took a shuddering breath before standing straight. "Did you see that movie sequel that came out? We used to watch the first one all the time." He moved over to your living room and plopped himself on the couch. You followed behind him, sitting on the farthest side from him. "Yeah... I haven't had any way to watch it though."

He smiled boyishly. "I downloaded it." He took a few minutes plugging something into the tv, where he pulled it out of you were not sure.

You sat separately as the movie started. Gojo paused it and looked to you. "Do you want popcorn?"

"Uh, yeah sure" You got up to move, but he ushered you to stay put.

"No, no I got it. Don't worry." He sauntered off to the kitchen. I guess on the plus side he knew where everything was. After a few minutes he came back, a large bowl of popcorn in hand. He sat more in the middle of the couch now. The bowl taking up the only space remaining between. Gojo slipped off his glasses placing them on his head.

The movie resumed. Both of you slowly ate at the popcorn while watching. Your hands brushed periodically and it made your skin heat. Occasionally you snuck glances at him. His soft frosty locks, his white eyelashes fluttering as he blinked. You could just barely see the crystal blue of his eyes.

You looked away quickly before he could notice but at some points you could just barely see him turning to you in your peripheral and not turning back right away. Sure, he could be looking past you but you doubted it.

The popcorn had been devoured. It was one of your favourite snacks and you knew he knew that. He placed the empty bowl on the table and subtly moved closer to you. You pulled your legs up in front of you, your feet facing him.

Your toes brushed the side of his legs. Even that little bit of contact almost had you begging for him. Mentally you scolded yourself. Swiftly, he scooped his arm under your legs and stretched them across his lap. "You can stretch out, it's a long movie." Gojo looked to you, a soft smile playing on his lips. His blue eyes dipped to your lips, your neck before snapping back up and then returning to the movie.

You swallowed sharply before looking back to the tv. Was it hot in here? You felt hot.

Gojo settled his hands atop your legs and leaned more into the couch. His fingers playing with the fabric of your pants absentmindedly as he watched on. You shivered slightly at the touch. "You cold?"

Coughing to cover your stutter, "Oh uh yeah a little." Actually your body was on fire and your heart was racing but you didn't stop him from reaching over and grabbing the throw blanket that rested on the side of the couch. Gojo strategically threw it over you both. You thought this would give you more of a barrier between you to stop his incessant touching that you were not going to out right say no to.

However to your horror or your relief his hands stayed under the blanket and continued his movements. You could feel him testing how far you would let him go. His hand rubbed up and down your shins, massaging softly. Could he hear the pounding in your chest?

Slowly the area he occupied increased, his hand running up your thigh, squeezing after a random amount of strokes. Could he feel you squeeze your thighs together every time he did? You were fidgeting. Flexing and wriggling your feet. Your hands busily picked at your shirt under the blanket.

Gojo's hand slowed and stopped. You took in a deep breath. Maybe his torment had stopped but you hated that it did. He readjusted your legs to move from sitting by his knees, to right in his lap. One hand moved to rest just above your hip and the other stayed, making taunting circles on your thigh. You forgot you were staring when he turned and looked at you. "You okay?"

"Uhuh." Swallowing you turned back to the movie. A few minutes passed. His hand on the thigh kept making taunting delicious circles while the other slowly started to move back and fourth.

You hated this, how he broke your heart, acted like nothing happened and then came over here like he still had some sort of say over your body. What you hated more was that your body didn't hate it, that you couldn't stop him. You could feel the slickness collecting between your legs. The way your body begged for his touch.

The circles above your hip had started out on top of your shirt. At some point that you hadn't noticed his thumb had slipped underneath and was toying with the skin right above your waistband. You adjusted your legs, he halted for a moment letting you move. You brushed the need that had developed in his pants. His face pinched at the contact, his chest rising and falling heavily.

As you settled, Gojo returned to his current occupation. The movie still played, you didn't even know what was happening. You pulled your legs away and stood up. The blanket falling, your eyes catching his hardness but you quickly looked away. "I um just need some water. Would you like anything?"

He spread his arms along the back of the couch, not even remotely embarrassed of his length pushing through his pants. "No, I'm okay. Thank you." You nodded quickly and moved to the kitchen. He continued watching the movie.

Grabbing a glass and a straw, some ice and some cold water you sat back onto the couch. What had possessed you to sit right next to him, under his arm? He threw the blanket back over you, draping your legs over his, while the arm behind the couch wrapped around you and he slipped his hand into your waistband.

You could feel his fingers running up and down the skin of your hip, if he moved anymore to the side he would have a handful of your ass.

Shakily, you sipped on your water, the ice clinking grabbed his attention. Gojo's crystal blue eyes looked down on you and you hated the way it made your core tighten.

"Thirsty?" You held the straw towards him in offering. Watching as his mouth found the straw, sucking softly, his throat bobbing as he swallowed. God, you have never wanted to be a straw so bad. What was wrong with you? He let it go, water droplets on his lips. "Thank you."

A shaky hand reached up and wiped the water from hip lip with your thumb. You hesitated right over his mouth. His lips parting, his warmth breath caressing your skin. Without hesitation he kissed the tip of your thumb, taking back the water droplets, the moisture wetting his already soft pink lips.

You let out a shuttering breath, his hands gripped you. One free hand grabbed your glass and set it on the table. You couldn't stop yourself from staring at his lips, against your better judgement your hands snakes around his neck, tangling your fingers into his white locks.

Gojo licked his lips, eyeing yours. "Can I kiss you princess?" Words failed you, so you settled for nodding your head. You wanted him bad. It was wrong but it didn't matter.

He hesitated at first then in record speed gripped the back of your head and pulled you into him. You couldn't even stay you didn't also pull him towards you. You clashed in a frenzy of lips, teeth and tongue.

Tugging at his hair caused delicious moans to leave his mouth and you swallowed them greedily. You nipped at his lip and he opened easily allowing you to slip your tongue past his lips. He pulled away for a breath. Both you of gasping, chests rising and falling rapidly. The way you had looked, eyes blown, hair a mess, lips puffy, must have triggered something primal in him. He latched onto your neck biting, nipping and sucking down to your collar bones and across. You knew he was leaving red angry marks but you had no intention of stopping him.

He couldn’t take it much longer. His hard throbbing length ground into you and it only made your core flare with need. Almost as if sensing it, Gojo picked you up, wrapping your legs around his waist and walking you to the bedroom. In that time it became a personal mission to leave just as many red marks on him as you were sure he left on you.

He deposited you on the bed, his glasses thrown to the side and his shirt discarded on the floor. Gojo grabbed you by the thighs and pulled you to the edge of the bed, slipping off your shorts and underwear in record timing.

"Wait, Toru I-" He stopped and looked up as you sat up and moved away a bit. A wave of disappointment crossed his face. "Do you not want to?"

"No, I do I just.." He grabbed you again, pulling you back down. "Then lay down baby and let me taste you yeah?"

His kissed up the inside of your thighs, nipping and sucking as he went. Small gasps left you lips and you looked down to see him already watching you. As he approached your center, you both stared at each other. His tongue licked a slow strip. "Mmmm... I missed the way you tasted. So sweet." You could not control the soft moans that left you lips as he slowed licked and sucked your clit. You writhed under him, to stop you from moving away he wrapped an arm around your waist, gripping your thighs.

With his other hand, he teased a finger along your opening. "You're so wet for me baby, fuck." Whining you gripped his locks, pulling his face back towards you. Gojo chuckled at your neediness. His long index finger slowly pushed into you as he sucked harshly on your clit.

"Toru, i- fuck" Your breaths were heavy as your chest heaved. His movements continued, his pace increased as he brought you closer and closer to the edge. "Toru, I'm so close, I- I can't-"

"Come for me princess, I wanna taste you, it's okay baby" Gojo continued his assault as he pulled you over the edge and let you ride his face as you rode out your high. Your body relaxed, eyes closed as his touch disappeared. You were too strung out to even really think.

He moved around the room but you didn't pay attention to him. You were so relaxed now you could have slept. Probably better than you had since he had left.

Satoru grabbed the back of your head and pulled you up to your knees on the edge of the bed. His cock on your lips, pre cum dripping out as you took him in. "Ugh fuck baby" His hand on the back of your head encouraged your movements as his length hit the back of your throat.

He did not give you time in between thrusts, relentlessly fucking your face until you were a drooling mess upon him.

Gojo pulled out with a pop and leaned down to bring his face to your level. "You look so good with my cock in your mouth princess. Did you miss my cock?" You couldn't say much, your brain clearly was not working so you nodded at him. His blue eyes were wide with desire as he smashed his lips against yours and pulled away abruptly.

"Turn around. I want to fuck you from behind. I love the way you look when I'm deep inside you from this angle." With slow movements you turned around, he grabbed your thighs to pull your knees right to the edge. Your reflection in the mirror on the other side of the room stared back at you.

His cock caressed your folds as he pressed down on your back making you arch into position. "Look at me." Your eyes snapped to his in the mirror. Slowly he pushed into you. Groaning as he did. Holding still once he was fully seated.

"Fuck~ you're so wet, your pussy is gripping my dick so hard it almost hurts. I can tell you missed me inside you." Both of you shuddered as he slowly pulled out to the tip and slammed back in.

Your nails dug into the blanket, soft moans leaving you both as his paced increased. One hand gripping your hip and the other pushing you down, keeping you in position as he slammed into you relentlessly. "I'm going to come baby, you feel too good I can't stop..."

His thrusts became stuttered as he pushed into you with one last thrust. Bending over you as you both panted heavily. Gojo kissed along your shoulder, across your back and down your other shoulder while still being seated inside of you. After a few moments he reached for the towel and set it underneath you, wincing as he pulled out and left you in a pool of your own mess while he cleaned himself off.

Your brain was still jumbled as your sat on the towel, before you even could come to your senses he was already dressed. His white locks a sweaty mess upon his head, his black sunglasses covering his eyes.

"Oh, you're leaving?" You couldn't stop the disappointment from entangling with your voice.

"Uh... yeah. I can't stay so." Gojo kissed the top of your head and went for the bedroom door. "I'm free later in the week. We can hang out again if you like. I'll text you." Before you could usher a response he left, closing the door behind him.

Tears welled and fell and quiet whimpers turned into full sobs as you sat in the mess of the both of you. You hated yourself for giving into him, for letting him touch you and be inside you again but what you hated more was that you knew he would be over again and you knew you couldn't bring yourself to say no.

#jjk gojo #gojo x you #gojo saturo x reader #gojo x reader #gojo satoru #jjk x reader #satoru gojo x reader #gojo angst

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l3viat8an · 1 year

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Repost! fluff! and idk if you’ll see this again anon but thank youu 💚💚💚

Asmo; "Come on sweetie~ it'll feel amazing~” Asmo practically sings in your ear as he leads you to his bathtub "Asmo, | just want to sleep..." you mumble half heartedly pulling back to his bed, "I know~ but the bubbles and warm water will feel amazing, so just come on and relax ‘kay?" you sigh, you know he's right so you agree, "Fine, but I want cuddles after." "Deal!" When you get into his bathroom, Asmo helps you out of your clothes and into the tub, you let out another sigh but this time it's a content one "Oh, Asmo this is nice~” "Told you~! So enjoy~"

Mammon; it only takes one text from you, 'Mams, can you get me (thing)? Oh and some pads / tampons plz' and he's off to the store, grabbing everything you asked for, plus a few crappy $5 rom-com movies and some junk food 'n chocolate. Walking straight into your room and setting the bags on your desk as he shows you everything he got "-and that's everything I got! So now ya can spend the next few days with me! Relaxin' after all nothing but the best for my human!" The others do drag you off at some point-

Beel; "I know Mammon already got you some snacks, but, I thought you might want some real food." whether it's homemade or takeaway from Hell's Kitchen, Beel's more then happy to share his food with you! he'll even feed it to you, if you want!

Satan; Picks out your favorite book or one you'd asked him about before and with his back resting against your headboard, reads to you, his left hand absently playing with your hair in-between turning pages~ "Enjoying the book love?" “Mimhhh" you hum contentedly. All while Belphie Is laying on your other side his arms wrapped around you and listening to Satan read. Obviously Belphie is the best living bodypillow ever~ He's just so warm it helps you relax. (Think of Belphie like a demon sized heating pad XD)

Levi; has all your favorite games on standby for ‘emergencies' like this!! "I thought this would help you, uhh not think about the pain and stuff…and well, games are always fun!" extra points if your favorite game is something you two can co-op!

Lucifer; knows it's no picnic constantly being hounded by his brothers, even when they're trying to take care of you. Sometimes peace and quiet is the best thing~ he's even got some over the counter human pain meds if you want them! Plus the softest pillows and blankets ever on his bed~ laying down in his bed and pulling you closer, placing a soft kiss on your forehead while muttering "Goodnight darling~"

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the-demonus-aunt · 1 year

Note

If mc started to have a nosebleed how would the brothers react (and dateables)

I love this one, it's random and chaotic xD

Belphie

It's the smell that wakes him

He opens his sleepy eyes as copper lingers all around him

His first reaction is one he's ashamed of later: Excitement. It's been too long since he's smelt something so delicious

His second reaction is fear, gripping his insides and tossing them around when he realises that it was you he fell asleep next to

When he sees you awkwardly pressing a tissue to your face, but otherwise okay, relief mixes with confusion

Once you explain the situation to him, he'll take care of you, but he WILL laugh and tease

"Little human, oh so fragile, aren't you?"

Beel

Utter shock spread across his face. Why? Because he really didn't mean to push you against the kitchen door frame face first

He was on a hunt for food, blinkers on and only one thought on his mind: hunger

Well, he forgot about yesterday's burger in the fridge now

Instead he holds a tissue to your nose, as careful as he can, and gives you some affectionate little pecks on the cheek

Who knew the giant could be so gentle

"I'm so sorry, MC. I'll make it up to you! Do you want some of my chocolate pudding?"

Asmo

Ew. Don't get any blood on his white satin scarf??

Don't worry, he'll get over himself and help you

He'll make face about it but he's already getting you a towel

Ok but why is he kinda into it? Teary eyes, metallic taste, little moans

He'll pat your head and make sure to fix your make up and clothes if they got dirty

"Oh honey, don't worry. You're still so cute, even with blood all over your face!"

Satan

He read about that!!

Yes, he gets a bit too excited about it

Can you blame him, though? You're bleeding...out of your nose! Do you not realise how weird that is?

When he realises you don't really find the situation funny, he immediately pulls himself together and is there for you

"So how can I help? More tissues? Sure! Might these cat pics comfort you?"

Levi

Oi!! What got you so horny so suddenly??

There's no use in explaining to him that that's not what nosebleeds mean after all

It couldn't have been him, could it?

...could it have been?

This seems easier in anime

He'll give you a tissue, but he'll blush way too hard

"Let's...let's just go back to playing games, 'mkay?"

Mammon

Human?! Are you dying?!

Oh man, he's freaking out

You're bleeding, you're his human and you're losing life juice!

It takes some effort to calm him down, but eventually, he learns to deal

Gives you a smelly old t-shirt to bleed onto tbh

Takes you on a gambling night out when you're okay again, bc you both deserve some fun now

"...we could prolly sell that shirt for a buncha money now, ya know?"

Lucifer

No listen. He loves you.

But he scoffs and turns his gaze back to his paperwork

He knows nose bleeds happen to humans. They're rarely dangerous. So what?

Well, you're kinda butthurt he didn't even ask if you're okay and you're showing it, too

He realises he could have been more compassionate later and apologises

He'll give you a tender flick on the nose and offer to share some demonus with you

"Do you feel better, love? Let's make you forget. What do you think?"

Diavolo

Frankly, when he smells it, he first thinks you just started your period

But when he turns around and sees what's happening, he doesn't hesitate

He wraps you up in his massive arms, pressing you to his chest without any regard for his white shirt or expensive jacket

This man will show you love and comfort, no matter what

Why? Because you're bleeding and he loves you

"MC, oh no. I'll take care of you!"

Barbatos

He gives you a handkerchief. And another one. And another one. Where does he keep all of them?

He'll clean you right up, too, when you stop bleeding.

He has also already prepared a tea that heals from the inside. When did he do that?

You'll have forgotten about your pain within minutes. How couldn't you?

"How unfortunate. Here, don't mind it. We'll have you fixed in no time."

Solomon

Well, he's human, so he gets it

He lends you a cloth with a weird gel already stuck to it and makes you some hot chocolate as solace

"MC? Where did you go? I made us some hot drinks?"

Simeon

Oh?

MC, are you alright? You seem to have something on your face...

He's never seen anything like it before but he remains calm and curious

He asks about what to do and follows your explanations to the letter

He also tries to search the internet for advice but all the spelling mistakes let the searches go nowhere

"Oh my. What's happening? This is normal, you say? Okay, what do we do?"

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doggone-devil · 2 months

Text

How (Not) to Summon a Demon: Chapter 7

SURPRISE!!!!!! It's another chapter! What? So soon! You betcha! The last chapter had me in a chokehold and I just couldn't. Stop. Writing. So here's chapter seven, lengthy af. Like... it's longer than all the others. I'm so sorry, but it's necessary, I promise! Pairing: Alastor x fem!Reader Warnings: mentions of blood, death, violence, Alastor being Alastor Word Count: 3,477 … what have I done XD (Link to the Ao3 posting just in case you wanna read it there and not here!)

“Maybe it’s about a subscription,” Veronica says as you pace back and forth in your room. “You know, letting you know a free trial is up?” You shake your head. You knew what the text was as soon as you saw it. It had woken you up from such a wonderful dream, your mind reeling when those seven letters glared at you. You had laid there, waiting for hours, until you heard Veronica leave her room in the morning before dragging her into yours.

“It’s him, I know it,” you seethe, trying to stay calm. You’re unsure how he even got your number, but if he had that much, then he knew everything. Where you lived, where you worked, who you were in contact with. Veronica. You glance towards her, guilt rising in your chest. She was only aware of the basics of your past fuck up, barely scratching the surface of the shit pile that laid beneath. He could hurt her, no. He would hurt her. Just to get to you.

“Ok, so your crazy ex has your number, no big deal! Just block him.” Veronica grabs your phone, tapping the number of the message. It disappears. “See? Gone.”

“It’s not that simple,” you say, sitting on your bed, placing your head in your hands. “He’s a creep, a level ten stalker. He’ll stop at nothing to find me. Again.” You flinch as you remember everything. He had been such a smooth talker, charming his way into your heart with empty promises. It was a high school love, a dream come true. The unpopular girl getting the prom king type story. After graduation, when the two of you moved north, that dream turned sour. His true colors slowly showed themselves as he took his anger out on you, the marks on your lower back and upper thighs evidence to that. You managed to run away, to leave him but not for long. Within a few months, he had found you and the treatment was worse. You thought you were going to die, at the hands of that merciless pig.

How you managed to escape the second time, you were unsure. Call it the will of the Divine, but you did escape. You had returned home, scared and always looking over your shoulder. It took Veronica nearly a year just to get you to go anywhere. She thought it was just cause your ex was an asshole. She didn’t know how his hands had been wrapped around your throat, how he sneered at your face turning blue, or how he laughed when you coughed in attempt to regain your breath. He was a monster and now he had found you.

“Girlie, ain’t nothing going to happen,” Veronica says, bringing you back to the present. You don’t mean to flinch when she reaches for you and she pulls away. You apologize but she shakes her head. “Not in this house. There ain’t nothing to say sorry for, ok? You got me here, and even Alastor! He sure as hell will protect ya!”

“Yeah, ok.”

“Oh come on, don’t tell me you don’t see how he looks at you?” You gawk at her, eyes wide. “Figured you didn’t. You’re blind as a bat, you know that?”

“What are you talking about?” you ask in disbelief.

“Girlie, that man has looked at you with hearts in his eyes since he showed up. He is hooked.”

You bark out a laugh, bewildered by her statement. “Veronica, I’ve only known him for, what, two days? Three? We barely know each other!”

“Time has nothing to do with love, honey. It can show up and bite you on the butt whenever it wants to.”

“No,” you deny, shaking your head. “It’s impossible.” Not to mention, he’s a demon. You’re pretty sure love is an emotion demons can’t feel, whether they were human before or not. Right? You stand and walk to the foot of your bed, crossing your arms.

“Any why is it impossible, hm?” Veronica follows, stepping in front of you with her hands on her hips. “For the past five years, I’ve been trying to get you set up with someone. I’ve been patient cause I figure it’s hard getting over shitty exes, but girlie, I’m tired of seeing you feel bad for yourself.” You look away from her gaze, guilt rising in your throat. “It’s about time you let someone love you.”

“I can’t.” Your arms drop to your side. “I’m not…”

“What? Worthy?” Veronica looks at you angrily. “You’re worth far more than you think. I see it.” She tilts your chin up, forcing you to look at her. “And he does, too. Give him a chance.”

“Veronica,” you sigh. “He doesn’t like me.” He can’t, you think. He’s only here because you summoned him.

“Alright, that’s it!” You startle when Veronica claps her hands. She walks to your closet and starts yanking out clothes, throwing them right and left.

“What are you doing?”

“Picking an outfit for you,” she answers, spending a second to look at a pink shirt before tossing it, too.

“Why?”

“We’re going out, that’s why!” She stops finally on one of your nicer, pastel blue shirts. It’s cropped with a white daisy printed on the back. She pairs it with some blue jeans shorts and shoves them into your arms. “Put this on. I’m going to go tell Alastor.”

“Wait, what if he’s asleep?” you ask, trying to stop her without dropping your clothes.

“It’s nearly noon, girlie, I’m sure he’s awake. Now hurry up!” She’s out the door before you can protest, leaving you to stand alone the middle of your room. You sigh and drop the clothes onto your bed, knowing there wasn’t any way you were getting out of this.

—

Alastor quirks a brow when it’s the black haired woman at his door and not you, taking a second to applaud himself for answering with his human disguise. “May I help you?” he asks, making sure not to sound annoyed.

“Wear something comfortable, we’re going out.”

“Beg your pardon?” Alastor’s grip on his door tightens. Veronica looks at him with a smile.

“Not like that, ya goof,” she explains. “Me, you, and girlie are going out for today. She needs it.” Veronica leaves him after, heading to her own room to no doubt get dressed. Alastor glances towards your bedroom, relaxing slightly. An outing did sound nice. He only got to see New Orleans at night when you had taken him to that strange sandwich place with the green interior. The fact that you thought the food there was worthy of multiple visits astounds him. You obviously didn’t know what good food was and he had been tempted since to show you. Perhaps, after the outing, he’d offer to cook tonight’s supper. Yes, that’s what he’ll do.

With a snap of his fingers, Alastor fixed his clothing. It was an outfit he adored when he was alive; a white button up, dark brown pants with suspenders attached, and black dress shoes. Satisfied, he walks out to the living room, finding it empty. Not wanting to wrinkle his clothes, he stayed standing by the coffee table, idling himself with nails.

Your door opened first as you step out and Alastor can’t tear his eyes off you. It’s a simple outfit, nothing extraordinary about it, but on you, Alastor is captivated. The blue of your shirt makes your skin glow like the sunrise, beckoning him to come bask in its warmth. He has to still himself to keep from moving toward you as you sit on the couch.

“Sorry about this,” you say, your voice meek and shy. Your cheeks are red and you keep looking at his body. Alastor feels his smile widen, eyes lidded. How deliciously adorable.

Before he can respond to you, Veronica comes out of her room, very loudly to Alastor’s distaste. She’s wearing a more revealing outfit than you, her breasts pushed together and up. Men will no doubt be staring once she’s outside, but Alastor’s attention is already back on you, barely giving her a thought.

“Damn, Al, you don’t dress to disappoint, do ya?” Veronica comments, the nickname sounding revolting from her lips.

“Yes, well, one should always strive to look their best, wouldn’t you agree?”

“Fair,” she shrugs. Alastor’s lip twitches. “Let’s get going. I’m ready to have some fun.”

“Where are we even going?” you ask, standing up. Alastor once again has to still himself, the urge to stand next to you pulling at his core.

Veronica garbs her wallet and tosses you your keys. You’re caught off guard and attempt to catch them, but they slip past your fingers. Alastor reaches out swiftly and grabs them. “Here you go,” he says, watching you take them, the blush from before returning. He chuckles and watches it deepen as you dip away from him, following after Veronica. He straightens up and trails after you, holding the front door open for you to pass through. Veronica is already waiting outside in the hall.

“I figured we could go to Bourbon Street. I haven’t been in a while and it’s got lots of things for us to do there.” Alastor’s eyes widen. He remembers Bourbon Street, the nightlife of New Orleans back in his day, littered with speakeasies and jazz clubs. It wasn’t exactly what he imagined when invited to ‘hang out’. Waiting for Veronica to get a few steps ahead, he lowers himself to reach your ear.

“Is this the same Bourbon Street in the French Quarter?” he whispers, nearly laughing when you jump at his voice. Your face has been a constant red this entire time and he finds the color becoming his favorite all over again.

“Yeah, you know it?” she asks, her voice low to keep Veronica from hearing. He glances at the black haired girl before answering.

“Darling, I was the highlight of it,” he teases. “Though I doubt it’s still the same scandalous street I once knew it to be.”

“What do you mean by scandalous?” she asks but Alastor straightens back up just as he sees Veronica turn toward them. She’s standing by your car now, waiting. Alastor is quick to walk around to the driver’s side and hold open the door as you step in. You thank him, hiding from his gaze as he shuts the door. Veronica waits by hers for him to do the same, but Alastor simply hops into the back. He chuckles low when Veronica huffs with a frown and gets in, fascinating her seatbelt.

The drive to the French Quarter isn’t long and Alastor feels nostalgic watching the newer parts of New Orleans bleed into the city he once called home. It both shocked him and made him proud to see some parts of her never changing despite how big she’d gotten. Since his death, it seemed New Orleans doubled in size, gaining attraction for its historical beauty. It kind of irked him knowing his era was only a fad, a quick interest to younger folks nowadays. They knew more of it than he did, getting to see the evolution through time.

Ignoring the annoyance, he chose to look at you as you drove. Your attention was hard focused on the road, your eyes checking the mirrors and streets every so often. When you caught him looking in the rear view mirror, your eyes would widen slightly and blush. Alastor was becoming addicted to that look on you. He wanted to see more. Too bad it wasn’t just the two of you right now, he thought to himself. He looks away from you. Too bad? Was he disappointed he wasn’t alone with you? Veronica had said this was for your sake, a chance to get you out of the house. He understand that, knowing how important it was to change scenery when things were becoming stale, but why did he want to be alone with you?

This was becoming absurd. Ever since you summoned him up him, things have been different and new. You were suppose to have made your wish by now. Most humans he’d heard of usually did. The demons he heard talk about being summoned would boast about how easy it had been to get the human to wish, especially when told they could be granted anything. Humans were easily entertained and were greedy, wanting nothing but money, fame, or sex. Yet you were different. You wanted nothing, it seemed, even going as far as to asking if you could use your wish for another. Such a selfless act, it had Alastor baffled. He assumed it was then that you caught his attention, wiggling your way into his thoughts. Yes, all you were to him was a fascination, a curious mortal he wanted to know more about. That’s all.

“Woo, we’re here!” Veronica shouts, breaking his train of thought. Alastor looks up to see her climbing out the car, you as well and so he follows. Looking around, he’s once again surprised at just how much hasn’t changed. His smile grows.

“What do you think?” you ask him.

“It’s like I’ve never left,” Alastor answers, smiling down at you. You don’t seem to notice but your small hands grab his arm, interlocking as you wait by his side. His chest swells and he feels heat itching his nose. “Shall we, my dear?” You giggle, a heavenly sound to his ears, and nod your head. He begins to walk, following Veronica who is already heading down the street into a bustling crowd. It’s definitely more crowded than he remembers.

“I bet these shops weren’t here,” you say. Alastor agrees, looking at all the colorful signs lining the buildings you pass.

“The buildings were, but - oh!” Alastor points to a small shop with an antique sign. “That one is still the same.” You look to where he’s pointing and laugh.

“A dentist? Really?”

“Well, the dentist himself may be long since parted, but the shop itself was around, yes,” he tells you.

“This is so weird,” you comment and Alastor tilts his head.

“How so?”

“I mean, I’ve lived here my whole life practically. I’ve seen these streets hundreds of times, but, walking with you, it’s like seeing them again for the first time.” Your eyes light up as you talk, leaning into him slightly. “You have access to a history I would’ve never been able to know had I not met you. It’s nice, being with you.” Alastor feels something in his stomach stir, something moving around. It’s a strange feeling and he doesn’t like it. Perhaps he’s just hungry.

“I’m glad you think so,” he says. He looks around for your roommate, the other woman long since disappeared. He wants to find something to eat, but doesn’t want to be rude. Then again, if she was doing her own thing, that meant it was just you and him. How nice that sounded, you and him. “Are you hungry, my dear?” You look relieved that he asked.

“Starving. I haven’t ate breakfast yet,” you admit. Alastor hums, searching for a decent spot to pick. There are plenty of restaurants to choose from, some small while others seem to take up a whole block. Some have awfully bright colors and he decides to stay away, not wanting to eat at a place with a giant, yellow M fixated above its doors.

“How about that one?” you ask. You’re pointing at a bistro tucked away in the middle of two larger businesses. There’s barely a soul inside. It’s perfect.

Alastor happily leads you to it, opening the door for you like the gentleman he was raised to be. He finds it unpleasant that you’ve had to deal with men incapable of even this much, wondering just how many have attempted to court you and failed. It would be such a pleasant sight to watch them perish at his hand, watching as they realize with fearful eyes that they never stood a chance with you. He bites his inner cheek to keep his smile from growing sinister, feeling bloodlust crawling through.

“Welcome to The Little Easy! Table for two?" a middle aged woman asks, approaching the two of you with menus. You nod and together, the waitress leads you to an open table. Alastor pulls out your chair, waiting for you to sit before he does. The woman chuckles. "I haven't seen manners like that since my husband was alive!"

"Your husband sounds like a gentleman, then," Alastor comments.

"Oh, he was. A dying breed today, I'm afraid." Again, that statement angers Alastor. Has the world of men truly fell so far after his passing? "What can I get you folks started with?"

"Um," you look at the menu provided, worrying your bottom lip between your teeth. He wants to bite it. Wait, what? Alastor quickly looks down, jaw aching. He wants to bite, to maim, to eat. His mouth waters. Hopefully there is something appetizing here, for his sake.

"Can I get the pulled pork po-boy, a side of fries, and a glass of water?" you ask and Alastor perks up. He checks the menu and sure enough, there's a list of famous pressed po-boys. Excitement fills him. He hasn't eaten a po-boy since he was alive, a delicacy that had just recently caught on before his death.

"Sure can, honey, and what about you?" the waitress asks.

"I'll have the roast beef debris, swiss cheese, thank you." She nods and takes the menus.

"And to drink?"

"Water, as well."

"Coming right up!" The waitress leaves and Alastor glances over to you. You're fiddling your thumbs on the table, obviously trying to avoid looking at him. He chuckles, making you look up now.

"What?" you ask.

"I was just surprised, is all," he answers. You tilt your head, nose scrunching up. It reminds him of a rabbit. "Po-boys were a classic in my time. I'm surprised they're still around." You smile, nodding.

"They're still a classic," you state, folding your arms on the table and leaning forward. He forces himself to stay locked on your face, ignoring the way the collar of your shirt dips down. "New Orleans is famous for it's shrimp, jambalaya, po-boys, and voodoo. At least, to tourists, it is."

"And what do you find it famous for?" Alastor asks.

"Well, as silly as it sounds, I kind of like it for the bayous," you admit, blushing slightly. Whether from him or embarrassment, he's unsure. "Most people look at them and think, ew, muddy waters and alligators. I look at them and think -"

"Beautiful."

You look back up at him and smile. "Yeah, beautiful. The moss covered cypresses, the way the sunlight dances on the waters, it's captivating. I love them." Alastor nods, knowing the feeling.

"The bayous were also an admiration of mine when I was alive," Alastor says, watching how you lean closer to listen, enthralled. "They weren't exactly a playground back then, people often warning not to go in unless you sought the workings of a voodoo witch. Yet I found them peaceful, using them to take quiet walks whenever the city became too much."

"I get that," you comment and he knows you're telling the truth. He can see it in your eyes, that you've dealt with some hardships in life. He wants to take those away, to never let you be burdened by anything ever again. That terrifies him.

"Here's your drinks," the waitress announces, setting down the red plastic cups in the middle of the table. "I'll be right back with your plates." She's gone again and your quick to grab your water, gulping some down to ease your nerves, he assumes. Alastor takes a sip from his.

"I should probably text Veronica," you say, taking out your phone. "I totally forgot about her for moment." As you mess with the annoying hand held thing, Alastor can't help but feel a bit proud. He had caused you to forget about her, your focus only on him. It made him strangely happy.

Happy.

No. What was he doing, acting like some school boy? He was a powerful Overlord, for Hell's sake. A wretched demon who tore apart any who defied him, devouring them and basking in their screams. He sent fear shivering down the spines of all who unluckily crossed his path. To you, he would - he… He sighs inwardly.

Who was he kidding? Whatever it was you were doing to him, no matter how much it angered him with the way his dead heart felt, he wasn't going to stop it. Alastor had already decided, soul or not, that you were his.

Now he just needed you to make the wish, so that you could never escape him, even in death.

taglist: @i-like-potatoes12533, @girl-nahh-two, @mcntsee, @projectdreamwalker, @sassmasterxx, @alsemain, @yunimimii, @noraunor, @justneo11, @dragonlover123a, @falsemain, @ephemeralxv, @theshello, @wonderlandangelsposts, @weirdflower2024, @yourworstgf

Phew! So long, again, so sorry, but hope you dear readers enjoyed! Comment below to get added to the taglist and, as always, see you all in the next chapter!

Masterlist , Ao3

#hazbin hotel fanfiction #hazbin hotel fanfic #hazbin fanfiction #hazbin fanfic #alastor fanfiction #alastor fanfic #alastor x reader #alastor x you #hazbin hotel alastor x reader #hazbin hotel alastor x you #hazbin alastor x reader #hazbin alastor x you #the radio demon x reader #the radio demon x you #the radio demon #alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin alastor

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factual-fantasy · 1 month

Text

27 asks! :00 Thanks ya'll!! :} 💖💖💖

Nope! Sorry, I don't take direct drawing requests or suggestions. <:/

Now I hear a few people saying; "But you've taken requests before" Now I do draw things in response to asks sometimes. But its rarely a direct request that I'm responding to. Usually its someone complimenting me on "something" and I feel so flattered and inspired that I draw that "something" again for them..

Would you think less of me if I said I legitimately was? For what I think is a very valid reason? Hypothetically of course-

@wolfie-777

:DD Oh hey!! Thanks!! Happy early Easter!! :}}} 💖🥚🥚🐺🥚💖

Oh there's no need to worry Anon, my body is kind'a forcing me to take a break... 😅

@yourstrulylightstar283 (In response to this post)

Thank you! And no worries, I'm sure I wont have to deal with all of this forever <:}

Happy late reply Friday! <XDD

@midnight193

Aww! Sweet widdol baby!! :DD

And thank you, I'm doing my best to take it easy.. <:}

Woof. That is quite the sentence to say to someone who's grieving their late wife-

Its especially strange considering that my Bowser isn't in love with Peach at all and isn't interested in replacing his wife-

I've heavily considered Louis having a crush on Ellie... 👀👀

The biggest eater is probably Louis, followed by Seafoam. Now Seafoam is no glutton mind you, he just eats a ton because he's so big and tall. He's got a lot of muscle that needs to be fed and maintained. Louis however just loves food and loves to eat <XDD

The pickiest eaterr.... couuuld be Red. Kids am I right? <XD Or maybe Spidercrab. He's rather thin so I imagine there isn't much he likes to eat. <:/ Or maybe Spidercrab isn't picky, he just doesn't have much appetite--?? <:DD

Aww! What a fun idea! :D I wonder if the game has anything like that.. and I wonder how a land animal like that would fare out on the ocean :0

(In response to this post)

Y-You realy mean all dat?.. Thank you.. 🥺😭💖

@manybrokenquills

XDD I am everywhere

(Also if you ever feel like getting those photos those would be hilarious to see XDD)

@rubyplayz12

YA- AWWWW... :(( sorry about the lost progress! I hope you catch back up to where you were pretty quick :( But YAY YOU HAVE IT BACK! XDD

A marshmallow cookie and a S'mores cookie already exist in the game :( so I shan't make my own 😔

I'm still working out the order of their ages.. So far I have decided that Ludwig is the oldest. And I'm leaning on Iggy being right below him, the second to oldest.

I'm solid on Bowser JR being the youngest, and Lemmy being right above him, the second to youngest. As for everyone else though..? I'm still trying to figure it out.

Thinking that Roy and Morton are on the older side, and Wendy and Larry are on the younger side. I just don't quite know what the order will be-

Hmm... I want Larry to be very different looking from Lemmy, maybe a bigger age gap would help. And I made Roy rather mature.. he could be older.. hmm...

Mayyybe.. in order from oldest to youngest, it goes,

Ludwig - Iggy - Roy - Morton - Larry - Wendy - Lemmy - JR..? I think I'll go with that for now <XDD

Now Bowser is complicated. Originally I wanted Bowser to be this ruthless monster. Both as a King and as a Dad.. But I made that Bowser around when the Movie trailers were all the hype. And boy, I hated how Bowser was shaping up to be. So my rotten Bowser was mostly just to make him more intimidating then the movie Bowser.

Since then I've settled down and thought that a purely evil Bowser is not that interesting.. or lore accurate. So I began to lean on him being a rather good dad, if not emotionally awkward.

....buuut then I saw the movie, and now I'm back on the Bowser hate train <XDD I guess right now its up in the air. He's not meant to be intentionally abusive or awful to his kids though. I'm thinking that maybe the gentle fatherly side of Bowser was usually brought out by his wife.. Since she's gone now.. well.. I guess he's a little emotionally absent at the least-

As strictly a King, I'm thinking that he's pretty rough. At least he's more ruthless than he may have been before. I guess a way to describe him as King would be.. The health and safety of his people are not his #1 concern. The strength of his kingdom and his position of power however, is. Though this Bowser is subject to change.. :/

XD He'd probably look like this 👇

@kaiserdarken

I'm not sure if the Pizzaplex would have decorated the place for Easter or not.. In present day or in the past.

But if they did in the past, I imagine it didn't feel much different compared to any other time of the year..

And if the present day Pizzaplex celebrates it..? I imagine its hard for the animatronics to see all the bunny imagery everywhere.. 💔

@beryl-shade

Google seems to suggest that there are no sirens in the games.. :( So Blue Beauty wouldn't be one, 😔

@hazardhazel20

Thank you!! I'm glad you do! :DD

You mean my Refinedtale Toriel.?

Man.. I'm sure she does.. (Though heck if I know what their names would be or any of that stuff-- but I'm sure Toriel would know <XDD)

Ooooo that's a good idea! :00 I haven't thought about it that way before..

@collisionofthestars-newblog

That sounds really fun actually! And normally I could see that happening.. though unfortunately, some of the structures I have set up in my AU make this scenario less likely..

For one, I intended for healing magic to be extremely complex and very difficult to master. And its intended to always leave a mark of some kind. A warning that Kamek gives to Lemmy and Iggy is something along the lines of "Whether you are healing, or destroying. Magic will always leave a scar." That's why Iggy's eyes look so strange and half of Lemmy's face and hair is discolored. The act of repairing their eyes left a mark on them..

What I mean by this, is that Kamek couldn't just turn around and heal them after every sparring session. Because it is very challenging to heal with magic and they would both be left with scars.. So they would both have to heal naturally over time after sparring. And considering that the Commander has a very important job, it would be wise to not tire him out or injure for the sake of some emotional relief.. :(

Although.. there could be a more mild version of this perhaps? Where the commander is involved in Bowser's training.? But not as his opponent. Perhaps he flies up high and chucks projectiles at Bowser for him to deflect. But not really getting involved on a way beyond that where he becomes overly exhausted or inured.

...Now for the Koopalings?? Dude, that's genius. Bowser is a hefty opponent and is sure to exhaust Commander and possibly even injure him.. But the Koopalings?? Commander would make a GREAT sparring partner for nearly all of them! :00

Specifically I can see him sparing with Morton, Roy, Ludwig and possibly Iggy. (The older Koopalings primarily) Whether its just muscle against muscle or being Iggy's target practice, I think he'd make a great sparring partner for the youngins :}}

It started with being inspired by my band-aid covered hands (due to dry hands and cat scratches) and adding them into my sona

Nowadays its maintained by me having reaaaaally dry hands 💀 (I wash them way to often/harshly and don't rehydrate with lotion often enough-)

You mean the factual fam? Aw, I'd like to think so. :}}}

Bold of you to assume Jangles doesn't have hair

@ghfhgkfngjvfnvfnvmfkf

<XD Yes, Bibi is around 2 years old-

#my response #super mario bros #fnaf security breach #cookie run #cookie run kingdom #cookie run ocs #my ocs #factual fam

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quitealotofsodapop · 24 days

Note

Ok, but in the Mother-Child Preggers Tang au... what if it crosses over with Slow Boiled au?

Referencing this post I made about Tang accidentally drinking from the Mother-Child River while the gang are travelling in S3.

Oh gosh i love the idea. In all the chaos of Wukong having his Stone Egg, Tang accidentally gets himself in a similar postition. XD

Throughout the Slow-Boiled Au, Pigsy and Tang frequently prove themselves to be good parents, and with all the talk of Wukong's overdue baby, the freenoodles pair both start to wonder...

Both brush the thoughts off cus they're in their 30s at least, and MK is enough. But the thoughts still crop up time to time.

Then cue Tang getting so thirsty during the S3 team-split, that he takes a big mouthful of river water without boiling it first. Pigsy initially blames the scholar's cramps on giardia. But they were oh so wrong.

Scorpion Queen pretty much forces herself into the gang because she's the only one around who *knows* how the Mother-Child River works. And she's not gonna let her new friends get hurt with all this bone demon business!

Pigsy, unsure: "Hey, Scorpion? I have something I really need to ask about the River." Scorpion Queen: "Sure thing! Ask me anything!" Pigsy, hesistating: "Will... will the baby look just like Tang? Or is some... river god involved?" Scorpion Queen, catching on quickly: "OH! Oh no no no! Theres no river god baby-daddy!" *starts laughing* Pigsy, relieved: "Phew!" Tang: "Aww! Piggy, you were worried!" Pigsy: "I dont mind our kid being a mini-you. I just dont want some gross minor god to have his mitts on ya'." Scorpion Queen, still laughing: "Nah dude! You guys are gonna have a cute little piglet!" Pigsy & Tang: "Wut." Scorpion Queen: "Couples came to the River to have babies all the time! If the drinker had a mate, then the baby would take on the appearance of their partner by absorbing some of their dao. If it didn't, then the Kingdom of Women would have been overrun with inbred clones!" Tang: "Ah, that makes sense." Pigsy: *completely dumbstruck with joy* Wukong, quiet until now: "...wait. Did the ladies back at the village think Master and Zhu Bajie were a mated couple that fumbled the process!? Is that why they laughed so much!?"

And ofc because of their shared situation, Tang and Wukong bond over the rest of the roadtrip. Tang would 100% wear a cringey matching maternity shirt with the Monkey King if they had time to stop for some shopping.

Pigsy breaks the news to the rest of the gang in an... unelegant fashion after the Samadhi Fire ritual went belly-up.

Pigsy: "So uh... stuff happened when we all got separated back in the desert." MK: "Yeah, you said Monkey King got amnesia and thats how Scorpion Queen joined the team." Scorpion Queen: *delighted wave!* Tang: "There's more to it MK..." MK, panicking: "Oh gods, you guys aren't hiding a world-ending secret too, right!? Cus I cannot deal with-" Pigsy, cutting him off: "Tang is pregnant. And we've decided to keep the baby." MK: *struck silent* Sandy, joyfully: "Congratulations! I hope the Monkey King didn't hear too much of you guys making it!" Pigsy, blushing furiously: "NOT LIKE THAT!!!" Tang, amused grin: "How else are babies made, Piggy? I'm certainly not having a stone egg.~" Pigsy, red-faced: "'CUS YOU DRANK THAT STANKY MUD WATER, THATS HOW!" MK, frozen stiff: "Wut."

Needless to say, MK is happy for his parents, but the timing isn't ideal. After LBD is defeated though, MK fully embraces his upcoming baby sibling! XD

Unfortunately the timing also means that Tang spends S4 in a very compromised position.

Yeah, Mother-Child River Tang isn't having a fun time...

#slow boiled stone egg au #mother child river tang au #slow boiled stone egg #pregnancy tw #lmk tang #sun wukong #lmk pigsy #lmk scorpion queen #freenoodles #freenoodlesshipping #lmk #lego monkie kid

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dapg-otmebytheballs · 2 months

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Not Phil randomly dropping three different unrelated incidents he feels bad about at us knowing he'll get validation and reassurance here, lol, like when people do something wrong and go to their friend who will always tell them they're in the right to deal with it yas bestie you have come to the right place for an objective third person perspective on this XD

#amazingphil #phil lester #dan and phil

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lozchi · 9 months

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A little tiger?

A/N: first fic, edited, I don't think I could balance the length to separate it into chapters, so here ya go XD Decided to write for Hoon-ie after not getting enough fics of him. I read every possible fic in existence, so now I'm joining the rabbit hole. Pairing: Taehoon Seong x !F reader (Gender Neutral, actually. But it steers more towards a female reader.) Themes: Fluff, profane language, actual fluff

i am convinced this man wears eyeliner.

There were a few things that you came to agree on with Taehoon before you moved in together, in which he took the time to hash out the nitty-gritty details that would shape your lifestyle.

First things first, cleanliness was non-negotiable. Clean up after your own mess, get rid of those stinky socks on the coffee table, and don't you dare delay washing those dirty dishes. A fair share of chores is just as important. Fuck gender roles. That shit doesn't matter to Taehoon, neither to you. You embraced a fair distribution of chores, because who needs traditional gender norms cramping your style?

Communication was key to keeping your domestic life intact. You made it a rule to give each other a heads-up before inviting anyone over. Taehoon didn't want to be caught by your dad walking out of his room after he just woke up, walking around the place while he was shirtless, and you couldn't blame him. No free fanservice for your old man, sorry.

And then, there was the ultimate deal-breaker: absolutely, ABSOLUTELY no pets allowed. Sad, but necessary. You both recognized the responsibilities and potential burden that a furry friend could bring into your peaceful (chaotic mostly, thanks to your petty bickerings) haven. So, you made the tough call to keep your space pet-free, even though it meant missing out on endless cuteness.

These seemingly straightforward house rules were the backbone of your cohabitation. You can see where this is going at, just basic house rules you'd need to abide by. Easy peasy, right?

Dragging your exhausted self through the threshold, you fumbled with your keys, the metallic jingle filling the air as you struggled to unlock the door. With a half-hearted stretch and a lazy rub of your bleary eyes, you muttered curses under your breath. Fuck them. The sheer stupidity of your project groupmates. Ugh, seriously, could life get any more frustrating? But hey, that's fine since you have-

"You cute little shit. You're mine."

Are your ears lying to you? Is your menace of a boyfriend baby talking someone… Who's not you?!? To hear him speak so sweetly that he would never even bring himself to talk to you in the same way as he did just now. That's right, give him a piece of your mind.

Brows furrowing in frustration and jealousy, you'd speak up. You need to talk to him, he deserves a little lecture. As you walked inside your humble abode, you grumpily stomped your way to the bedroom.

"Taehoon Seong, What the f-"

Caught red-handed, Taehoon's eyes widened as he notices your enraged expression. In a panicked manner, he swiftly hurled a nearby blanket into a corner of the room, as if hoping to hide the evidence of his silly stunt. You'd rarely see such a horrified look on his usually stoic expression, Calling this pretty boy other than the stupid nicknames you give him feels so strangely threatening, almost like stepping into uncharted territory. Hello? He's "Hoon-ie", "Pretty Boy", "Sneaky Link", "Sexy Bastard"… Who the fuck is "Taehoon Seong"?

But before you could launch into a full-blown confrontation, a soft and unmistakable "Meow" reverberated through the air, breaking the awkward tension. Busted. Who would have ever thought that Taehoon, the seemingly more composed and level-headed one in the relationship, would dare to break the sacred "no pets" rule? It was unbelievable, mind-boggling, and to make matters worse, it wasn't even you who did this cheeky act. This left you momentarily stunned.

Now, off to berating your boyfriend.

"Oi, I thought we–"

"That was me."

"Didn't know that my man can meow like a harmless creature–"

"Shut the fuck up…"

An awkward silence fills the air for a moment, with you thinking about the act Taehoon pulled, while he starts contemplating whether or not he should break it. The tension was then interrupted by this "unwanted guest". Of course, the cat manages to escape from the blanket, heading its way towards you, its tiny paws padding across the floor.

You know that you can't stay mad, especially when Taehoon is being unusually soft – except that it's not being directed towards you. Your boyfriend is an immature dick of a tsundere, deal with it.

Leaning down to stroke the adorable creature that had stolen your boyfriend's heart, you couldn't help but be enthralled by its soft, velvety fur. Okay, let's admit it, the cat was undeniably cute, but that didn't mean you could suppress the pangs of jealousy that surged within you as Taehoon showered the little feline with affection.

"Why on earth didn't you give me a heads up about bringing this cute shit home? Seriously, you've broken not one, but two rules,"

You exclaimed, unable to hide your frustration.

He glanced at you, a hint of guilt flickering in his eyes.

"I acted impulsively, and I'm sorry."

Is what you imagined he would say. After all, he should apologize for his thoughtless actions. But let's face it, again – your boyfriend had a knack for being a dick. Instead of the heartfelt apology you expected, all you received was a blank stare and a nonchalant shrug.

"Oh, for fuck's sake."

You exclaimed, exasperatedly. Pinching the bridge of your nose, you let out a weary sigh. Finally, he broke his silence, bringing an end to the internal debate he seemed to be having.

"I brought it home because it reminded me of you."

And that's a good thing right? He probably brought it home since the cat was cute, like you, right?

"Where did you even get this? Did you buy it, take it from an animal shelter, take it from the streets… Or did you steal this from someone?"

Too many questions, Taehoon is NOT willing to answer them. But he does anyway because you being an interrogative bitch needs to stop.

"Took it from the streets after I-"

Taehoon began, but you interrupted him, already familiar with the story.

"Lemme guess, another round of beating assholes up?"

You asked, a hint of sarcasm in your voice as you gave him that annoying, knowing, AUDACIOUS smirk. It turns him on a little though, not that he'd admit that.

"They were hurting it."

So, instead of mindlessly beating the shit out of random thugs just for 500 won, he had actually stepped in to protect the defenseless creature? For once, Taehoon had an actual reason for his actions – okay, maybe not once – but it caused a surprising warmth to spread through your heart. You couldn't help but feel a sense of admiration for him. It was as if he genuinely wanted to provide a safe haven for the cat, and that realization melted away any lingering resentment.

You looked at Taehoon, noticing a glimmer of excitement in his eyes as he gazed at the little feline. You could've sworn he looked so determined to keep the rascal. In that moment, your heart softened at the oddity of your dear menace.

"Okay, but for real, why did the cat remind you of me?"

Ugh, seriously. Stop with the questions. It's slightly pissing Taehoon off to the extent that he'd kick your ass (only lightly though, knowing full well that it'd rile you up anyway).

"Weak and helpless like you. Especially during training. At least sometimes. Most of the time."

If you expected a better answer than that, then prepare to be dissapointed. He's Taehoon Seong after all, you brought yourself into this.

"And in bed too-"

You send a series of aggressive smacks on his ass. His comment was a little uncalled for! Oh, come on, Taehoon!

"And cute. And cute! Stop it, bitch!"

He chuckled in amusement; those little hits would do little to no damage. And once you stopped, the both of you would look at the cat with another question in mind.

"What are you gonna name it?"

"Ratface."

"Disgusting. Let's go for it."

"Bitch, I was kidding."

"Hoon-ie Junior, then?"

"That's a shitty name."

"It stemmed from yours though-"

"Exactly."

"Meow~"

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Taehoon's naming skills were straight up shitty, and it was painfully obvious considering the ridiculous names he had come up with so far. Some were unnecessarily flamboyant, meant purely for sarcastic amusement, while others were downright horrendous. But let's face it, naming a cat after a character from Tekken would be a vast improvement compared to "Ratface." It had been ten fucking minutes, and neither you nor Taehoon had managed to think of a decent name yet.

"What about 'Hwoarang'?"

"Seriously? Haha, you're terrible at this."

You couldn't help but sneer at Taehoon, teasing him mercilessly as he futilely attempted to push your face away, only for you to playfully bring it even closer, peppering his face with kisses. Deep down, he wanted to do the same to you right now, but his entire focus was fixated on finding a proper name for the cat.

"Bitch, you're no better yourself,"

He retorted with a scoff, rolling his eyes in exasperation. I mean, who in their right mind would name something as sweet as this little feline "Tabasco"?

"Pocachip."

You suggested, realizing that both you and Taehoon were nowhere near finding a suitable name.

With a defeated sigh, Taehoon gave up, flopping down on the bed with the cat resting in his lap. It seemed better to leave the poor thing unnamed than to burden it with a ridiculous moniker. Naming could wait for now.

Ugh, if you ever considered having mini Taehoons then- whoops, too early for that.

But honestly, if you couldn't even come up with a name for a cat, how on earth would you manage to name your own children? Then again, it was too early to think about starting a family, and having kids wasn't currently an option on the table.

"I'll go out and buy some things for the cat."

Leaving again? You just got home. Not on your pretty boy's watch. Before you could make a move, Taehoon swiftly grabbed your wrist, his expression turning blank as he stared at you intently.

"I already took care of that."

He stated firmly.

This man was full of surprises. It was evident that he truly wanted to take care of the cat. Seeing Taehoon in this soft and caring state was unusual but endearing. If you got to witness this side of him every day, then you had no choice but to happily play the third wheel while he tended to the little kitten.

"You're really serious about this. Hah! I always knew you were a softy deep down~"

Bitch, you're teasing him so much. Stop poking his cheeks and shit, it's making him feel all giddy. He smacked your hand away, but you could have sworn to god you saw a faint pink tint on his usually pale complexion. Damn it, his fair skin made it difficult for him to hide the blush.

Minutes, hours then days pass by in a blur. Yet you and Taehoon are still no closer to giving the furball a decent name, not that the little stray needs one. The cat shall remain nameless for now, no big deal. Your life's still pretty much the same, at least a little.

Though there were times you felt a pang of jealousy creep over you as Taehoon would DELIBERATELY sweet talk the kitten just to get a reaction out of you. LOL! You have no idea how smug he feels whenever you pout or sulk in the corner of the room. He knows what he's doing, and once you caught on, he turned it down a little. Keyword: A little.

You thought caring for the adorable kitten while Taehoon was away for taekwondo practice would be easy-peasy-Taehoon-tease-me. But you were so wrong.

"Psspspspss kitty kitty!"

You call, desperately trying to gain the cat's affection. But to no avail. How does Taehoon make it look so effortless?

Every time you and Taehoon want some lovey-dovey time, that furry menace does everything to steal your man's attention. The lion, the witch, the audacity of this bitch. This goddamn motherfucker's gonna keep Taehoon all to itself.

"Cockblocker."

You sigh in frustration.

The furball has now wormed its way into your hearts. Yet giving it a name seems impossible. For now, the nameless stray shall remain…causing mischief and mayhem, one purr at a time.

"Hoon-ie, I have no idea how you get that little shit listen to you."

Other than Taehoon being the one to bring the cat home, is there really something else that would make the fluffball listen to him? Okay, he's intimidating, that's a plus. And it's the same reason as to why Hobin and Snapper would have to deal with his antics.

"My words are law."

"Not to me, they're not."

Taehoon chuckles. Oh, how could you be so stubborn? Accept the fact that this man will get anything he wants, no matter what sort of measures he'd take.

"I'm just better than you at everything else."

You gasped in mock offense, though deep down you knew that his statement was about 49.99% correct. But hey, at least you're better in making his heart pound of his chest. He gets all tingly and warm, ew, cringe. You make him feel so weak and you're not just better at it, you're the best.

"Huh? Wanna bet, pretty boy?!?"

Once you've started, know that you shouldn't back down. After all, you don't want to deal with Taehoon's teasing all week for such a petty argument.

"Alright, how about this - whoever can get the little shit to sit on their lap first wins."

Damn, this pretty boy loves you so much to the point he'll participate or even suggest bullshit.

"HAH! YOU'LL SEE."

You and Taehoon shoot challenging glances at each other as you call the cat, trying to lure it over with treats and toys. The furball pays you no heed and walks between the two of you, seemingly ignoring your bets and bickering.

"We really need a name for it."

And "Pocachip", "Tabasco", "Hoon-ie Jr." is not allowed. Taehoon starts to think whether or not you were hungry during thinking about those names. "Sh-"

"No."

#taehoon x reader #seong taehoon #viral hit #ptj universe #help idk what im doing #viral hit taehoon #how to fight taehoon #taehoon bb #seong taehun #seong taehoon x reader #taehun seong #doyouhave500won #taehoon seong #i wish there was only one way to spell his name I'm struggling

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shygirl4991 · 5 months

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SMG3 Sussy Notebook

ima tag smg3 sussy notebook spoilers and have the pics of the notebook under read more so you can pick if ya wanna see the notebook! These are highlights and not every page!

now that we have the pw for club penguin we can all log in and get all the cool skins, honestly i feel if mario just guess the password it wouldnt take him long to get it xD be faster then stealing the notebook and all

ah yes the start of the worlds longest slowburn its a super funny thought that right out the usb he gets his notebook and goes this bitch here ima make him my life rival

oh shit shout out to these two that showed up in SMG3 Gauntlet of gloom

suuuure buddy keep telling yourself that, seems even tho SMG3 marked him as his rival and hated him over what happen in college he still wanted to hang out with 4 and be friends but its not like he cares or anything...baka!

lmao the censor on what happen in the igloo ah yes nothing but hugging happen there nothing to M rated xD im guessing the real book in universe might have it a bit more detail given the big deal it was for wotfi 2023

we really dont talk about that hug

did...did i call it in my fic that this man legit is crazy about beans and hot sauce im dying i guess when your the bad guy with low budget for food you get use to the good classic beans and hot sauce

oh honey thats not how that works xD this man is smart but also oh so dumb i think he gets that from his avatar that and he is a few years fresh from the usb Update: @alianarepasa let me know its from a mad max episode i manage to miss it was a fun watch and now i understand what this means xD these peeps really went wild without internet poor toad

pifft im guessing he has masters degree specialized in psychology? other wise idk how he is a psychologist and he seems to be a good one from what we have seen but who knows he could be bullshitting his way through how evil xD

both our boys are ready to ride forklifts into the sunset someone draw this please xD

im laughing i guess SMG3 isnt much a fan of boopkins but seems he really enjoys being with the crew he wont say it but im sure he is a happy bean to finally be with the cool kids after years of being jealous.

he says but give this man eggdog or eggdog memes and he becomes Tari in a second

hey lads we found the page from SMG4 We Dont Talk About What Happened in the Elevator

he wants a castle but ended up with a sick lair in a coffee shop i think thats better!

okay putting my shipping heart away this is so interesting to me like he starts off thinking 4 is a loser and makes him his rival then gets jealous he has these friends and he isnt apart of them. We know SMG3 is lonely and lost as he doesn't know his purpose before becoming lord of the graveyard now being apart of the crew and now knowing who is he, SMG3 is much happier and closer to the crew. But the way he writes this feels like he likes the close contact with 4 and while he doesnt want to admit it could it be he legit does have romantic feelings? idk i feel these past episodes and this part really gets me thinking they have something here to really make smg34 canon naturally and not have the way they act with each other be to different might go more into this later.

this sparks joy thank you for including this and thats it for my ted talk thanks for reading again this is just my highlights i dont want to post the whole notebook here just stuff that gets my mind going!

#smg3 sussy notebook #smg3 sussy notebook spoilers #shay talks about the notebook #smg3 #smg4

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nerdycanible1 · 2 months

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Am back! :D

Omg guys! Almost forgot I had this ((joking)) but nah seriously! It had been years since I've posted anything here! 💀

Anyways imma go back to my roots!! Y'all remember the days of Legend of Korra where I've only simped for Lin Beifong? 👀 But I've found a new lady, well not really but I've got a new love!!

So y'all remember (if not don't worry about it) the whole genderbent au thing I've created and it was female Tenzin and male Lin and stuff like that? Well I've got some stuff for y'all!

So first and foremost, this is Tenna. She is genderbent Tenzin (female Tenzin). She is literally so hot and I cannot stop drawing her! Currently working on the backstory and this will be nothing like tLoK, actually it will in some places but yes! A lot will be changed!

But look at her! She's gorgeous! 🥺 Also I just wanted to show y'all my improvement of art over the years! QwQ it has improved so much and I'm so proud! Anyways I'll stop rambling and let ya get to the photo!

Tenna: 55 years old

Tenna in swimsuit enjoy 🗿

Side note: Tell me this isn't the most Tenzin expression ever xD

Anyways, my thoughts are simple. Make hot women. :D I am smooth brained and frankly I've been a simp for my genderbent Tenzin for years.

I wanted to update her concept instead of the one I've created years ago (plz forget that 💀) and frankly I love this version better. She looks kind, soft, hot, and first and foremost Tenzin-ish.

What I have for her so far:

She is 51-50 just like Tenzin in tLoK

She has one confirmed boy that I've come up with and one confirmed girl.

Their names are Jin (Jinora) and Ming (Meelo). I haven't come up with anything else for the kids as of yet.

She is pansexual. No discussion on this xD

She is currently in a relationship with Peng (Pema). But ma'am is known to wander around.

Tenna is also more in tune with her nomadic life style instead of the whole business stuff.

Tenna left RC at the ripe age of 16, leaving Ling (Lin) in the process but no hate. It was a mutual break up. Ling wanted to keep RC safe and promised Tenna that everything would still be up and running whenever she wanted to settle down.

Tenna fell in love with an air acolyte (whom I haven't decided to name as of yet) and stayed there for a year before the world called for her once more. It was a short but painful romance, one that Tenna often thinks about.

Once she was back on the road she fell in love with a non bender (Not Peng yet), got pregnant and went to RC for Air Temple Island. She stayed on the island for a few years raising her newborn son Jin.

Ling helped with all he could, being there for Tenna, taking care of her and feeding her and dealing with her grumpiness. He took care of her and once the baby was born, Ling knew he would protect the child as if he were the one to help make the baby.

Tenna couldn't have thanked Ling enough and felt horrible she was "holding him back" from finding his true love. Ling wanted to confess right then and there that he loved her but knew it wasn't the right time.

During the time of the whole pregnancy and the raising of Jin, Ling and Tenna fell into a romance. Stealing kisses, sharing deep secrets, touches that crossed the very thin line of friendship.

It wasn't until Jin started talking and walking that Tenna thought it would be a great time to start exploring the world. Jin barely being the age of 3 or 4. Ling confessed to her that he loves her and that she wished she'd stay for him but told her it was a selfish request. He instead kissed her goodbye and told her to look at the Northern Lights for her on one of her trips. Tenna never felt such sadness and sorrow but she promised to keep in touch. She watched as Ling got smaller and smaller as the boat began to leave the harbor and leave behind her very best friend and lover.

Sorry friends but this is where imma stop it before I bore you! Let me know if you want more Headcanons or if you want more art of this fine wine of a milf!

Send me asks, or ask simply in the comments or Dms about any of this au. I'm happy to reply and I'm excited to say that I'll be posting here regularly soon! And you know of course that there's gonna be more Lin Beifong art so prepare yourselves!

As usual, all art belongs to me. If reposted please credit. Thank you!

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b4mpyre-k1zz3s · 3 months

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The Blue Eyed Bandit

When a wanna-be cowboy rides in all the way from Tennessee, he’s laughed out of town, but Y/N can see something in him that others can’t, especially when their town becomes the target of ruthless gang of bandits.

Johnny Knoxville X Fem!Reader

(Cowboy!Au, Angst, Fluff)

5.9k Words

Warnings: Extremely suggestive content, prostitution, flirting, drinking, bar fights, guns, stalking, blood, wound care, knives, makeouts, hickeys, description of injury, gun sucking, degredation, groping, (attempted) kidnapping

An: I’ve wanted to write a story about Johnny as a cowboy for a while XD This was inspired by a lot of things, but especially the Mexico episode of Viva la Bam! I specificly wrote this story to be set in the ‘1850s, though it’s not explicitly stated. I did more research for this fic than any other I’ve written before, on topics from wound care to desert fruits and breeds of horses! It was super fun to write so please let me know if you would be interested in something similar to this in the future!!

You were lucky. It’s odd to say that working as a prostitute in a parlor house would be the luckier of any number of options, but it was. Leaning against the dry, rotting wooden post that held up the roofed porch of Madame Evette’s Gentleman Parlor, your current place of board and employment, you rolled this idea of luck around your mind. There’s always worse options, like that brothel up the road that had half its staff wiped out in the last smallpox outbreak. Working here, you always had a hot meal, warm baths, proper living quarters, health insurance, and much more reputable clients. In fact, you had started to get familiar with your regulars because nobody new ever seemed to come there. Looking out at the high, sandy bluffs that framed the desolate, arid New Mexico landscape, you realized that this was a town that new people didn't want to come to, but whose citizens seemed to want to leave by any means.

Lost in thought, you hardly noticed when a man walked up to the creaky railing you were leaning against until he tipped his hat at you with a warm, half smile, “Howdy, ma’am.” It shocked you how cordial he acted to you of all people. Still, you met his eyes. “Hi.” You recognized him- one week ago, this wanna-be cowboy from out east rode into here of all places to pursue his wild west fantasy, and he was already the laughingstock of the town. Still, you humored him a little, “What can I do ya for?” While he was a little dorky, you recognized the charming air he had about him that none of your other clients seemed to possess as he made conversation, “Well, I was under the assumption that this is the place for a gentleman like myself to find some company and,” Holding out his palm flat to take yours, he spoke low and with an accent you couldn’t quite place, “I would be delighted to be graced with yours.” Part of you assumed this was some sort of cruel trick he was pulling, treating a woman like you as a common lady, but you gave him your hand anyways.

Just then, the Madame caught sight of this through the window and swiftly came storming outside with a broom, “Keep those dirty paws away from my girls!” The commotion seemed to draw a good deal of attention as some of the girls inside peered out the door in various states of undress to giggle at the spectacle going down on the porch, and then there was you, caught in the middle of all this. “This is a proper establishment! You can take those dusty boots of yours down to the whorehouse across the street!” She chased him out into the streets, and there went the cowboy, ducking down an alleyway, laughing to himself.

You and the rest of the girls spent the evening lounging about the well furnished parlor, drinking wine in your garters and stockings while you entertained tonight’s men. Despite what people may think, your interactions with patrons didn’t start in the bedroom- there’s some drinking and singing and fraternizing one would usually have to get past before the fun stuff started. But the whole time you were chatting up the fat cat town banker while he puffed away at his cigar, you couldn’t help but think back to your interaction with that cowboy from earlier. There was something different in the way he treated you- how he saw you compared to how the rest of the town did. Most of the men you tended to wouldn’t be caught dead in your presence outside of this place, but he felt no shame in the slightest to interact with you. In fact, he seemed to have taken a liking to you. The thought made your chest feel warm.

Then, out of the blue, there was this great commotion outside, loud enough to rattle the crystal chandelier that hung from the ceiling. Oh. This couldn’t be an earthquake- earthquakes aren’t usually accompanied by the whip cracking sounds of gunfire. Oh. This had to be a saloon fight gone bad. You nearly fell to the ground as everyone in the parlor flooded out the front door for a chance to bear witness to this spectacle, and of course you followed shortly behind because while you were a lady, you were never one to miss a good fight. There was always something or other going on in this town, whether it be a shootout or a bank robbery, so most people were sort of desensitized to it at this point. Dashing out onto the dusty streets, all indigo from the night, so many people crowded into the little tavern next door that you would’ve thought the cheap wooden floors would’ve given out from sheer weight. The place was buzzing. You weaseled in, squirming past people. At first, all you could see over the heads of those in front of her was the town bartender Steve, the one with the shaved head, cautiously emerging from where he had ducked behind the counter, all pale under yellow lamplight. The bar in front of him was completely splintered and half of the bottles that sat behind it were shattered, sticky amber liquid draining down the walls and to the floor. The whole thing was pretty damn tragic- you knew Steve, and by extension knew how he had been busting his behind, having practically built this place from the ground up and kept it running with only a couple saloon girls for help. It was his way of fulfilling a passion you always found to be pretty selfless: making people happy. Albeit, it was through alcohol and cheap bar tricks, he still took it seriously, like it was his baby, and in one moment it was destroyed.

As you squirmed closer to the front of the crowd, that’s when you caught it. A blur of mauve then step on a chair, step on a table- crash! A man leapt out of a window with an armful of cash, green bills fluttering in the air with the sparkling shower of glass. Immediately, you recognized him, but anyone in town could with one look at that purple mink duster with the strange heart symbol on the back that hung from his shoulders or with a glance at that face that was just made for wanted posters. But just like that, he disappeared into the night. And there, on the floor at the feet of the people who had front row seats to all this, was the cowboy from earlier, and he did not look good. Well, he looked good, but he looked unwell, especially with the slowly growing red stain on his shirtfront. “My, my, my…you gotta deathwish, boy? Or are you just plain stupid?” A man standing at the front of the crowd glowered down at him like he was horseshit on his shoe, “Ana’body five miles round’d know not to mess with them bandits.” If it wasn't bad enough, he had picked a fight with the leader of the meanest gang of ruffians in the west, this ruthless fellow that went by the name Bam on account of all the chaos he caused wherever he set foot and that subtleness wasn't necessarily his style. Of course he didn’t know what he was getting into, but the bandit king was gone, and everyone had forgotten about the cowboy that was still bleeding on the hardwood, so you ran over to the bar for a wet towel. Still shaken up, Steve handed you the bar cloth he was unconsciously gripping and, as the townspeople filtered out, you went to tend to the man in the ground.

“Whats’re name, cowboy?” It was pity that urged you to help him, surely. As you peeled away the dark cloth that stuck to his skin, his chest rose with heavy breaths. He watched with half lidded eyes as you dabbed away the blood that was steadily trickling from where he was grazed with a bullet, swallowing as your hands ghosted over a faded tattoo of a woman’s name on his chest before he murmured in a voice still hoarse, “Johnny.” Smiling softly, you finished up cleaning his wound, “Well, what you did back there was mighty brave, Johnny.” Now that you got a look at him, you couldn’t deny that he was a pretty well shaped young man. Cracking an exhausted grin, he let out a labored chuckle, still polite despite the circumstances, “Well thank’y, ma’am.” Gazing up at you with those blood loss dazed eyes, Johnny murmured, a little embarrassed, “I’d invite you back to mine, but I don't think it’d be your style, considering. I, uh- I’ve been sleepin’ in the horse stables for the past week…” There was something undeniably endearing about that fact. You helped him to stand as you went to pull yourself up, “Well, what about tomorrow? We could have lunch together.” Stumbling to his feet, Johnny drawled, “That sounds like a fine idea.”

So you dressed up nice that Sunday in a dress you “borrowed” from one of the other girls that worked at the parlor with you- this vibrant pink dress, the color of ripe red pitaya fruit. The usually lively streets of the town were deserted on Sunday mornings, and since you avoided leaving the parlor during the day due to the looks you got on the street, Sundays were the only day you really went out for fresh air. Johnny was already waiting for you in front of the bar, still in the same clothes as yesterday, bloodstains and all. Seeing you fully dressed for the first time in a sort of ‘you clean up well’ moment, he looked you up and down before a smile crept onto his lips, “Why aren’t you at church?” You shrugged, “I ain’t exactly the churchgoing type, and if I was, they don’t take too well to my kind. You?” The two of you began to walk down the dusty streets, the midday sun beating down and warming your skin. Johnny walked in step with you, inching a little closer, “Well, neither am I.”

You ended up at this little oasis up on a hill at the outskirts of town- one of the few green places left in this god forsaken place. Sitting down on the grass under a Blue Jacaranda tree, you set your woven basket that you carried the food in down and you caught Johnny nearly drooling as you opened it. It was all food you found lying around the parlor- fluffy pink and white conchas, warm boiled esquites, and a package of salt pork wrapped in brown paper and twine. Handing him one of the pastries, he tore into it like a starved man. Noticing your surprise at his eagerness, Johnny stopped himself and added bashfully, “Sorry…In- In all truth, ma’am, I’ve been livin’ off’a bar peanuts for the past few days…” It was believable- that cowboy was looking mighty thin. Of course, he went right back to eating.

The two of you talked for a while. He told you all about the mishaps that happened to him on his journey there all the way from Tennessee, a part of the old Southwest territory, and about how before he realized he wanted to move out west to pursue his cowboy dreams, he was a writer for his town’s newspaper. There was no shortage of stories with this man, and you couldn’t complain because he spoke with this vividness to his words that just captivated you. Johnny asked you about what it’s like in your line of work. You told him that you grew up on a farm and came here for a better life, some life that turned out to be. But as long as you had a clean bed to sleep in and warm meals, you’d be pretty content.

“So,” You started after a silence, “How’s that wound healin’ up?” Swallowing what was in his mouth, Johnny loostend the top few buttons of his shirt and pulled the collar to the side over his bicep, exposing the half scabbed over pink flesh. Maybe it was just an excuse to touch his chest, the intimacy made more so that you were leaning over his body as he sat up on his elbows, looking down at you. Fighting back a blush from creeping onto your cheeks, you blinked and met his eyes, “It, uh…doesn’t look infected, no.” As you pulled away, your gaze lingered on his still open shirt, “Is that your woman’s name- on your chest?” Johnny glanced down at the name scrawled on his tan skin, “Nah. S’my daughter’s.” Never in your days could you imagine a man as young as him a father. Still, you couldn’t help but ask, “So she’s waitin’ for you with your lady back home?” Shaking his head, he smiled gently as if remembering something fondly, “Oh, no- my little girl’s all grown up. And my wife,” he wiped some crumbs off of the side of his mouth, his voice falling a little serious, “well, she left me ‘bout a year ago this November.” You asked for an inch and he gave you a mile. At this point, you couldn’t deny that you were interested in him, but you still maintained your stuff demeanor, “Well, I’m sorry to hear that.” Glancing up at the sky, you shielded your eyes with your hand, “S’noon. Church should be letting out soon.”

Conversation was light as you walked back in town and he dropped you off at the parlor like a gentleman. You made a resolution that this would be routine- outcasts like you needed to stick together after all, or at least that was what Johnny said. It was cute, in a way, all this wisdom he had. As the two of you were chatting as you passed an alleyway, you saw something out of the corner of your eyes- this dark figure and a glint of something diamond blue that sent chills down your spine. But when you turned to take a second look, the shadow disappeared.

That next morning, you and some of the other girls were relaxing on the porch in your frilly underclothes and chatting because you had no clients and, in your line of work, that is what you call advertising. Every now and then a man passing by would whistle at you and you’d have to go up to the rail and flirt with them a little, standing just where you did on that day you first ran into Johnny. His plight still occupied your mind. Poor guy- his daughter left him and so did his wife. He’s probably a very lonely man. Before you could get to thinking about how you would be more than happy to help him out a little with that loneliness, your attention was drawn elsewhere. It seemed that you were too slow to notice the panicked looks and the people starting to make themselves scarce until a hush fell over the street and the air was so tense you could cut it with a knife. Just as you could’ve sworn you could hear yourself sweat, that’s when you saw him.

This hulking, dark mass looked like a vulture on the prowl as he sulked past a roadside fruit stand. There was no question who this was. Your blood ran cold at the dark chuckle that reverberated through the bandit king’s throat at the poor, shivering man who owned the stand as Bam snatched something out of one of the baskets full of fruit, not bothering to pay for it. He was subtle and silent there, something nobody had ever known him to be. Flicking his Bowie knife out of its leather sheath, the silver blade glimmered under the hot southwestern sun like sparkling hot oil as he wasted no time carving the skin off of that pitaya fruit. Though his eyes were concealed under the shadow of the brim of his hat, you felt Bam’s chilling gaze on you from that predatory grin he wore as sticky, red juices bubbled up around the Damascus steel, smearing across his blade and dribbling down his fingers. As if to emphasize a point, he dropped the now discarded peel to the ground and brought the knife to his lips, a serpent-like tongue flicking out to lap at the last traces of sweet nectar from the sharp, glinting edge.

And he smiled at you.

A cool wind blew through the air as you and Johnny sat down at the top of the hill that Sunday. “You know, ma’am,” Sitting with his legs out, cowhide boots stretched out in front of him on the grass, he turned to you, “I never caught your name- your real one, I mean.” Glancing up from the basket, you shook yourself from your thoughts of your encounter with Bam that last week, swallowing before you replied, “It’s, uh- it’s Y/N.” A warm smile spread across his face as you spoke, the corners of his eyes crinkling up. “Y/N. That is a mighty beautiful name.” That warm feeling- that same feeling as before, swelled up in your chest as you stared out onto the golden desert that seemed to stretch on for miles in the early morning sun. “Johnny.” You cleared your throat, “Is this how you expected it to go? Life, I mean.” God knows that you didn’t. You came here looking for a better life. What a sham that was. It was rare that you really got to feeling sorry for yourself, but sometimes, and especially after what happened, it was hard. Feeling nauseated, you hadn’t touched a crumb of the food you brought for the both of you, while Johnny had eagerly gotten through more than half the basket by the time you spoke up. “If you’re askin’ me if I thought I’d end up a cowboy, traveling the land and rightin’ wrongs, I would say yes.” He added hurriedly, a little embarrassed, “But, so far in this town, that ain’t exactly what I’ve been doin’...”

“So, you’re not gonna stay?” Unconsciously, you had inched just a little closer to him, nearly laying your head on his shoulder as the two of you talked. This clearly didn’t pass under Johnny’s notice as his voice fell sweet like honey against your ears, “Well, I didn’t say that. What I mean is, “ He turned toward you slightly, so close to your face that his lips nearly brushed against your cheek as he spoke in a low, slow voice, “all I’d need is a reason to stay.” You only then just noticed how, with the way your face was tilted towards his, your lips were nearly, almost touching. And then they did. But it felt nice- different from the sloppy men who had stolen kisses from you before. It felt soft, and natural. Almost upon contact, Johnny sat back with wide eyes, surprised at his own impulsive actions, “O-Oh lord…” His voice got real quiet, nearly wavering, as he blushed softly, “That may’ve been the least gentlemanly thing I’ve ever done.“

You stopped him, placing a hand against the soft fabric of his dark, half unbuttoned shirt front and leaning back in to gently press your lips to his, your eyelashes fluttering shut. Johnny’s warm muscles were initially tense under your touch but as he relaxed into the kiss, so did his body, letting out a soft groan against your lips. You had never made a man blush before, much less react so earnestly. Reaching out to you, the cowboy’s hands found purchase in your clothing, calloused fingers tangling into your calico dress as he hurriedly undid the brass buttons. Your heart fluttered in your chest and your head swam from the passion and desert heat as you started to think that this was maybe what love was supposed to be. Johnny’s breath came out in hot pants against your newly exposed skin as he hungrily sucked mauve blotches onto your neck and chest, his facial scruff tickling a little as he practically devoured you. But he was gentle with it. So sweet and gentle.

Nothing could have pulled Johnny away from you then, not even the gunshot that cracked out loud in the town below while the two of you were still caught up in the heat of the moment, so you were the one who had to pull his face away from your bosom by his hair. You could feel his breath fanning out against your skin as you sat up to get a better look at the commotion. Howling and cackling like twin coyotes, off rode the bandit king away with his fair haired cohort, arms full of loot from their latest hit- the town general store. They had swiped a small fortune in gunpowder, dynamite, and tobacco. Of course, this drew the townspeople away from church early, especially when one of the two young men who owned the store ran out, shouting and brandishing a shotgun. He fired three or four shells in their general direction, but his shots didn’t come near the hides of the bay mustangs nor the bandits that rode away on them, kicking up dust.

Johnny went back to the horse stables that night and realized just how much everything was looking up for him. He had a roof over his head, the favor of a lovely woman he would quite frankly lay down his life for, and hot meals every night courtesy of the man who owned the stable, a fellow by the name of Chris who he had gotten to know pretty well. In fact, besides the town bartender Steve, he was his only friend, but it was hard to count Steve as a friend because he was always tacking extra tequila shots onto Johnny’s tab while he distracted him with some trick he picked up in the circus. Still, he could let that slide because business was business. Chris, on the other hand, was just a sweet guy who loved horses, and he had taken such a liking to Johnny’s horse, Noami, that he let him sleep in her horse stall there free of charge.

So that explained why he was in the stables in the middle of the night, laying back against her shiny, chestnut coat as she slept with her head against his chest, snoring softly. Funnily enough, it was the horse sleeping against him that woke up first when a dark figure hopped the front gates into the stables. Blinking awake after she stood up, Johnny sat up curiously to catch sight of the silhouette opening stall doors. He thought about Chris- all those nights of charity and companionship, just for him to let some two bit their run off with his buddy’s pride and joy? Oh, no way in hell he was going to let that happen. A flash of emotions went through his mind as he threw himself to his feet and stood up to block the front gate. Johnny’s voice was nearly a growl as he gazed across at the bandit who was currently trying to make off with Jezebel, Chris’ prized palomino mare. “Y’aint leavin’ with her.” Though he didn’t initially recognize him, Johnny put two and two together quickly.

Bam was dead quiet, only visible as the tombstone shape he made in the darkness as he got low, light glinting off of the silver spurs affixed to his heels. Then, all at once it was as if the cowboy had taken a steam engine to the solar plexus, while in actuality it was a black suede wrapped fist that had knocked the air from his lungs. Still, Johnny stayed on his feet, coughing hard and hitting him with a poorly placed uppercut that knocked that hat clean off of his head. Bam sputtered, his mouth now bloodied and dripping onto the sand as he ducked down, taking a step to the side as his right hand reached for the gun afixed to his hip. It was no wonder the bandit king would fight dirty. Before Johnny could duck away, cold steel collided with his orbital bone in a skillfully placed pistol whip and he was knocked out cold. As the cowboy’s body fell limp to the ground, Bam huffed and spun his trusty piece around a finger before slotting it back in its leather holster, shooting a look at the man below him that spelled out that his resistance would not go unpunished.

When Johnny woke up, the first person to come to his aid was the stable owner himself. Chris picked him up under the armpits, lugging his half awake self over to a wooden chair in a corner and leaving him there as he went to fetch some medical supplies from his home next door, leaving the door open as midday sun flooded in. Blinking awake, the first thing Johnny did was look around to see if maybe what had happened last night was a bad dream and that the horse was still waiting in her stable, which was especially hard given the purple swelling around his left eye, but her stall door was wide open from the previous night. As Chris returned with a leather medical bag, Johnny coughed, his voice gravelly, “He- he got away with Jezebel…” This was a low point for him. It seemed that no matter how or when he tried to intervene, there was nothing this cowboy could do, even for the man who had shown him such charity. Kneeling down and threading catgut sutures onto the curved needle, Chris seemed forlorn, yes, but there was an appreciative inflection to his voice as he stitched up the split in Johnny’s cheek, “But he could’ve gotten away with a lot more if you weren't here. I’d say that makes you a hero in my book!” Turning it over in his head, he decided that maybe he had a point with that, but he still wasn't going to tell Y/N. She didn’t need to know. As the needle pierced the cowboy’s skin, he winced, sucking a breath in through his teeth. As Johnny peered down at the dried blood that certainly wasn't his that still remained on his knuckles, he swallowed hard, his voice still tense and very grave, “I’ll get’re back for you. Promise.”

So you heard no word of the stolen horses the next morning and went about your day without a care in the world, tending to clients as usual. You were especially busy that night, feverishly going from man to man, doing your thing and racking up quite a sum in commissions from all the whiskey you pawned off. In fact, you were so focused that you nearly jumped when you heard your name, “Y/N.” Madame Evette tapped you on the shoulder, drawing your attention away from the client you were currently entertaining, “Room seven. There’s a gentleman waitin’ for you upstairs.” It struck you as odd because while men who wanted to skip all the fluff wasn't that uncommon, it didn’t happen every night. Apologizing to the fellow you were talking to with a red lipsticked kiss on the cheek, you turned to hurry up the creaky staircase, making clicky noises against the wood in your little heeled boots.

Wandering down the hall of rooms upstairs, you cracked open the door of room seven to darkness inside from a put out lantern. Oh, poor guy- he must be shy. That makes the whole no canoodling thing make more sense. As you closed the door behind you, you noticed that there was just enough light from the moon trickling in the open window that you could still see a general outline of the man sitting in the wooden chair at the far corner of the room with his knees about a mile apart as you approached him, doing your little flirty routine, “So, what can I do ya’ for, handsome?” Wordlessly, the figure gestured down with two fingers and you knew what he was asking for, especially after he shifted his hips to sit lower in the chair with a huff. Getting onto your knees, you positioned yourself between his thighs, the floor chilling the skin of your bare legs. Reaching out, you started to undo his pants, and while the downstairs parlor was consistently noisy, the soft metallic clinking of a belt buckle was the only noise in the otherwise silent room. Your lips fell open and your eyes suddenly went wide at the sudden, unmistakable ice cold feeling against your forehead.

It was the muzzle of a revolver. The voice that rumbled out of the man above you was nearly a snarl as he spoke through his teeth, “You make one peep an’ I swear to god,” he pressed the tip harder against your head for emphasis and you could swear you heard a smirk in his voice, “I’m puttin’ this bullet in your fuckin’ skull.” Your heartbeat pounded in your ribcage as you felt your head swim and you thought that this is what it feels like to be a jackrabbit caught in the jaws of a coyote. Quivering, your gaze nervously trailed up his body, and you could feel the color drain from your face when your sight fell upon his glinting, all too familiar vulture eyes, flickering like blue hot steel. Click. The bandit king slowly pulled back on the hammer, his hand so close to your face you could see his fingers curl around the mother of pearl handle and read the words etched into the barrel as he tightened his grip with his finger on the trigger. And he chuckled this deep, predatory laugh, grinning down at you with a mouth full of fangs as he spoke slow, deliberately, “Now you’re gonna stand up nice n’ slow with those hands b’hind yer back- and you are gonna be real quiet.” Frozen in fear, you couldn’t move under the shadow that looked over you even if you wanted to keep your brain inside your skull, which you really, really did. “Y’takin’ me fr’a fool, whore?” Bam’s thick accent deepened with agitation as he spit his words, nearly barking, “I said,”

“Stand. Up.” A gloved hand roughly tangled in your hair and yanked you up on shaky deer legs, forcing you to weakly comply much to his satisfaction with the gun still snugly pressed against your forehead. Standing maybe six inches away from you, you picked up on the distinct scent of alcohol and tobacco on his breath. With how his gaze lingered at your lips, you could tell he was getting an idea of something else he could do with that gun, but he just nodded, relenting just slightly at your compliance, “That’s it, girl. Now turn around.” Standing up after you, Bam jabbed the revolver between your shoulder blades making you arch your back as he harshly grabbed your wrists and deftly bound them with the red bandana he wore around his neck. Pulling the gun away from your spine for a second, a warning shot cracked out through the ceiling that made you jump, your eyes nearly bugging out of your skull in fear as you yelped. But your terror was funny- so damn funny to Bam as he pushed you along, the burning hot muzzle returning to where it once was.

The scene downstairs was absolute chaos after that bullet went through the ceiling. Startled patrons and half clothed women scrambled outside, flooding into the streets and attracting quite a bit of attention, especially from the cowboy that was lingering outside the horse stables before he was set to retire for the night. Even though every instinct in him told him to stay away based on the outcome of his previous heroic efforts, Johnny’s body lurched forward almost involuntarily, dashing towards the chaos that Madame Evette’s Gentleman Parlor had become. Pushing past frightened patrons, he stormed in right as Bam was walking you down the staircase as you stumbled in front of him. Your panic-stricken eyes met Johnny’s (or at least, the one eye that wasn’t swollen shut) as he stared at the scene in front of him, his tone stern but his fear giving way to a trace of vulnerability in his voice after he swallowed hard, “Let her go.” The man behind you tugged you back hard by your bound wrists as the gun relocated to your temple, wedging you in place between the weapon and where the bandit king rested his head on your shoulder, nuzzling against your cheek. “Oh, no way…” Bam held eye contact with Johnny as purred into your ear, speaking melodically as he taunted both you and him, “I gotch’re woman…an’ I don’t feel like givin’ her back.” Adding insult to injury, with his torso pressed snug against your back in a crude imitation of intimacy, his free hand, which was sitting on your hip, slid up your body posessively, reaching to roughly fondle your chest as he let out a low, predatory growl, his gaze challenging the cowboy across from him.

If you could’ve seen the white hot fury in Johnny’s eyes. Blinded by rage, he didn’t even consider using the pistol tucked into his holster, instead lunging to tackle Bam to the ground. You slipped out of his tight grasp just in time, clamoring to safety on your hands and knees on the hardwood floor as the cowboy just wailed on the guy. The struggle between the two was like watching two bighorn sheep with their horns locked in conflict, a blur of instinct and emotion, all rabid and teeth and fists. Letting out shuddering breaths, all you could do was watch the violent scene in front of you with your heart pounding out of your chest, not daring to move an inch. The only thing that could’ve pulled Johnny off of the man beneath him was when the town sheriff stormed in, grabbing him by the back of his shirt collar and throwing him off of the bandit king, or what was left of him as he lay limp on the ground. He was beaten to a pulp, almost literally- just a wheezing, bubbling mess of blood and bruising with a few teeth missing. Pulling Bam up by his sweat soaked black curls, Sheriff Tremaine held him to dangle in the air, glaring at the man in his hand with unadulterated disgust, “You’n you’re little gang’re goin’ away for a while.” There was no doubt that he had witnessed the brutality the cowboy inflicted, especially with the blood still dripping off of his still raw knuckles, but it seemed that he would let it slide this time, glancing to you and Johnny and tipping his hat, “We’re gonna get to roundin’ up the rest’a these bandits.”

Without a proper leader, the most fearsome gang of criminals in the west were left with nothing to hold them together, letting the sheriff's men easily pick them off and throw them in the slammer where they rightfully belonged. Life, for once in that godforsaken town, was peaceful. And Johnny? Well, after he was credited as the man who took down the bandits, he was hailed as the town hero, especially after he helped rebuild the bar and returned Jezebel to her stall at the town stables. Even Madame Evette had taken a liking to him, permitting him to come and go to the parlor whenever he felt the need to visit you- on the condition that he got a new pair of boots.

#jackass #bam margera #johnny knoxville #ryan dunn #chris pontius #steve o #ehren mcghehey #dave england #jeff tremaine #jackass fanfiction #jackass fanfic #fluff #cowboy!au #angst #jackass x reader #johnny knoxville x reader #yes I know pitaya isn’t realisticly that juicy but for euphemism purposes #Spotify

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