#yeah there are some cheap ones but... god knows im not the. only one who gets the mail LMAO

[rafeandonlyrafe]

feeling generous

words: 1.3k

warnings: 18+ only!, smut, dubcon!!, blackmail!!, blowjob, cum eating???, voyeurism, public sex, car crash but like its in a parking lot lol, pogue!/broke!reader

“shit, shit, shit.” you groan, quickly putting the car into drive and moving a few feet, cringing when you hear the crunch of metal coming undone. you throw the car into park and hop out to see your worst fears actualized.

“are you fucking blind?” the shout makes you jump. you didn't even realize that the owner of the car was sat in the driver's seat.

“im-im so so sorry.” you shake your head quickly, surveying the damage. you caught their back bumper with your own, the red paint from their car flaking onto your silver one. “i-i didn't see how close-”

“no shit you didn't see! jesus fucking christ, do you know how expensive this car is?” he shouts, standing to his full height and slamming the car door closed. you don't know how much the car is, but judging by the look of it and the man driving it, certainly not cheap. “this is a custom paint job too.” 

he places his hands on his hips, eyes shifting between glaring at the ruined back end of his car and you.

“insurance and id. now.” he huffs out. “before i call the cops.”

your eyes widen. you have the minimum required insurance, and even that payment is killing you, there's no way you'll be able to afford it if you get an increase for a crash.

“can i pay you out of pocket?” you offer, clearing your throat, trying to keep a level head.

“no way you're able to afford it.” his eyes turn towards your car. it's old, a junker, but gets you around fine enough. and best part, it was free, a hand me down after your grandma bought a newer car.

“i-i probably cant, but i can't afford the insurance increase either and i- we can work something out. please.” you don't care how pathetic it is, you'll get down on your knees in the parking lot if you have to. you're not beyond begging and pleading.

he looks you up and down before grunting, heading back towards his car. your feet spring into action, grabbing onto his wrist, not wanting him to reach for his phone.

“no, please, sir-”

“rafe.” he says, hand twisting so now he's the one holding your wrist. “my name is rafe.”

“oh.” you blink up at him before responding. “my name is y/n”

“you shouldn't have told me.” rafe holds his hand up. “in case i change my mind. you're lucky im feeling generous today.”

“oh my god, thank you so much!” you feel tears well up in your eyes.

“don't thank me yet, darling.” his gaze turns dark as he looks down at you, only now realizing how tall he is, how he towers over you.

“what do you mean?” you question.

rafe takes your hand gripped tightly in his fist, turning it and bringing it down to place it on his crotch. your eyes widen when he moves your fingers back and forth over his shorts, stroking along your length.

“i- what are you doing?” you try to pull your hand away, but he's holding on too tightly.

“it's either this or we can get insurance involved.” rafe looks at you, the shiny lip gloss smeared over your mouth. you may be a broke pogue, but your mouth should be good enough to please him, to ease some of the tension from getting his car hit.

“im not a prostitute.” you say, certainly not meaning this when offering to work something out.

“yet you're gonna get on your knees and suck me off. or i call the cops.”

“right here?” you look around the parking lot. it's pretty empty, but it's the middle of the day, the sun shining down on you, making the illicit act obvious to anyone who looks between where your two cars are parked.

“yeah.” he shrugs, pressing your hand harder into his crotch. he's obviously hard, seemingly almost painfully so.

you look back to the damage, the cherry red color that you're sure isn't stock, and then sink down to your knees. rafe smirks down at you as he drops his hand away from your wrist, light purple bruises already forming.

you gulp and resolve yourself to what you're about to do, tugging at his zipper before undoing the button on his shorts. you open up the flaps, eyes widening when you take in his length through his underwear.

rafe chuckles before pushing the elastic down to pull his cock out, exposing it to the warm summer air.

“suck.” he simply commands.

you open your mouth, taking an experimental lick at his tip, surprised that the taste isn't completely repulsive. you lick again before wrapping your lips around the head of his cock.

“come on.” he spurs you on. “do it good or ill cum in your mouth and still make you pay.”

the threat has you moving quickly, sinking down onto his cock, closing your eyes so you don't have to see rafe looking down at you. he may be attractive, but you're still getting forced to do this. 

“ahh, that's good.” he groans as you set a quick pace, bobbing your head up and down. you pray no one pulls into this part of the parking lot or looks your way. you'd be absolutely mortified to be seen on your knees for a man in the middle of the day, not even going into his car to suck him off.

rafes hands grip your hair, pulling them into two makeshift pigtails.

he lets you stay in control for a while longer before he gets sick of you sucking him off however you please. he shoves his hips forward, causing you to gag when his cock buries deep in your throat.

rafe doesn't give you time to recover, thrusting while holding your head still by the hair, tears now streaming down your eyes as he pushes in then out, in then out.

“fuck, you're actually good.” rafe chuckles. just his luck the dumb bitch who hit his car gives good head, your throat tightening as you swallow around him with every thrust.

you feel the combination of drool and tears drip down your chin, hoping rafe cums soon so this can end.

you place your hands on his thighs as your knees dig into the pavement. your jeans are going to be completely ruined by the time rafe is done with you, but at least you'll have money to buy a new pair.

you feel rafes cock swell in your mouth, your eyes widening to look up at him, the sun behind his head, illuminating him in a perfect halo, but he's no angel.

rafe pulls his cock out before he can cum. you stick your tongue out, knowing exactly what to expect as rafe strokes himself quickly, moaning as if he doesn't care about being seen as his cock shoots out ropes of white cum onto your face and awaiting tongue.

he taps the tip against your tongue, smearing it through the mess of white. “kiss it.”

it's humiliating, but not any more than what just happened. you pucker your lips and press a kiss to the tip of his cock, seeing that it's already beginning to soften.

rafe tucks his cock back in as you pant on the ground, hands coming to your thighs as you try to gain composure.

“hey.” rafes voice has you looking back up, your eyes widening when you see he's got his phone now, taking a picture of your disheveled state, face still covered in his cum.

“what was that for?” you shout.

“part of your repayment in case you ever try to go back on our agreement.” you understand what rafe means. in case you try to tell anyone he forced you into it.

rafe smiles when the look of acceptance sinks into your features as you resign to your fate. he bends down, looking you in the eye before his tongue presses against your jaw, dragging up your cheek, tracing the trail of your tears, not caring that he also tastes his own cum on his tongue. 

“see you around.” he smirks, swallowing your tears dramatically as he gets into his car, speeding away before you even get your knees off the ground.

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[italiansteebie]

something you'd never expect about steve harrington is that he loves halloween.

i mean, he really gets into it.

he dresses up, decorates the house, hands out candy and even goes trick or treating with the kids as an excuse. "i'm keeping an eye on you guys!"

"you didn't have to dress up though,"

"yes i did, dustin. you don't know everything."

even after the upside down bullshit, he still loves it, and maybe he kept his scoops uniform with blood and barf stains so he could use it as a costume. and maybe that was kind of fucked, but he's coping with it.

now, steve's love for halloween is one of robins favorite things about him. especially since his house is equipped for an exceptional party, what with the size and the decorations steve is going to put up anyways? it's perfect.

so the halloween after scoops, they throw a masquerade of sorts. it's quite a rager, despite steve's expectations.

he decided to go as a masked cowboy.

he got the boots, the hat, and he wore a leather vest that ended up giving him a chill for the night since other than some chaps, it was all he was wearing on his body. he did the whole nine yards with a red bandana and some sunglasses.

"hey cowboy."

steve turned, taking in the sight in-front of him.

a guy, with long curly hair, somehow making a jason voorhees costume work.

he tipped his hat, always committed to the bit, "jason." he said simply, thanking the bandana gods for hiding his blush.

"never woulda thought king steve would throw a party like this."

"why not?"

"i dunno. it's cool though, guy seems to have changed."

"for the better?"

jason tilted his head, "yeah man. for the better." he said it as though the decision had been made, and locked in place.

so they sat.

and talked.

all night.

and the rest of the party seemed to fade away. that is until a drunk robin, dressed as micheal myers laid across his lap, "kick everyone out, im tired."

he checked his watch, it was 4 am, probably about time for them to go home. so he stood, gearing up to say his farewell to jason, maybe ask him for his number, but when he turned again, he was gone. only the smell of weed and cheap cologne remained. (and later, he'd find, a lone 36 sided die, that he'd end up asking dustin about).

it's silly to think that steve was falling in love with this guy after only just meeting him, but he'd grappled with his sexuality on a bathroom floor, appropriately, and was ready to dive back into the dating pool. or maybe the puddle, because halloween jason, seemed to be the one.

the only thing is, steve has no idea who the guy is.

that is at least until, none other than eddie munson had a broke bottle pressed against his neck. now he didn't figure it out in that moment, but when they were fleeing for their lives, eddie's hand found a way into steve's, and back at eddie's trailer, steve caught a glimpse of none other than the jason voorhees mask he'd been searching for ever since that party.

and maybe it was a sappy declaration of love, but steve was nothing if not a hopeless romantic.

"don't be heroes."

it was pleading.

steve tossed the dice eddie's way, watching fondly as he struggled to catch it.

"steve- wh?" he could see the moment it clicked in eddie's eyes. steve turned, ready to finish this mess, so he could talk to eddie, to jason, and figure out some shit.

"hey, steve?"

he turned, meeting eddie's eyes.

"make him pay, cowboy."

--

it was done.

they did it.

a few were in the hospital but, hey. they did it. eddie had been in a rough way for a little while, eventually pulling through but not before some physical therapy.

steve was there when he woke up.

had been ever since he'd explained to eddie's uncle wayne how they knew each other and what eddie meant to steve.

eddie cracked open his eyes.

"howdy, cowboy." it came out scratched, and rough.

"eddie," steve breathed, grasping his hand.

"i knew i liked those chaps."

steve rolled his eyes, smiling while tears rolled down his cheeks. "you saved my life." eddie said, reaching a hand to steve's cheek. steve shook his head, "how can i ever repay you?" eddie said, a glint in his eye.

steve laughed, "no thanks necessary," he said, tipping his imaginary hat, leaning into eddie's touch. "there must be someway," he said, southern drawl creeping into his voice. "how about a kiss?" steve asked, eyes flickering down to the metal heads lips.

wayne shook his head at the boys' antics. "will y'all just kiss already? im getting old waitin' for ya!"

eddie laughed at his uncle's testimony, before nodding, "c'mere, cowboy," he said, before closing the gap between him and steve.

"was it rootin' n tootin'?" eddie asked, a cheesy grin on his face as he pulled away. "sure was, partner."

"oh my god."

"hey robs,"

"steve, shut up. eddie's jason! jason from-" robin stumbled into the room. "from the party!" she all but squealed. steve laughed, nodding, "yeah, babe. we figured that one out ourselves."

#steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #robin buckley #best friend robin #steddie ficlet #stranger things #halloween #steve loves halloween #best friend robin buckley #platonic stobin #steddie fic #steve harrington character study #spooky steve harrington #steve loves eddie #eddie loves steve #western steddie

[vargskelegore]

heyy im here with a request for shuri ^__^ how do you think being roommates with her would work? id love to see slow burn, angst, maybe a lil jealousy (nsfw maybe?), and fluff <3 thank you!

oh my god i think it’d be all over the place??? theres a lot of things that could happen, so here is what i think. (also.. all of this is fluff-- with implied sexual stuff. also black reader. forever and always.) this is also illiterate headcanons, meaning it’s not written in the way i write my fics with bulletpoints, its just thoughts i have and i write them down.

literally the reason why you don’t have shuri as your roommate in any of my fics is BECAUSE it would be so dramatic.

i like to think it’s a dream in theory but like pair that with all the other shit, and it would be a bit of a shit show. but in a good way. kinda.

y’all spend so much time decorating the dorm room tbh. lots of records that you and shuri picked up at the local mom & pop record shop.

i also like to think that shuri designed some stupid app for y’all to use to alert each other on dorm room things.

it’s nothing big to her, but to you it means a lot bc it shows she cares about how you two function as roommates.

basically a whole honeymoon phase when you two are first becoming roommates because y’all were already friends

but of course,,,, that kinda ends.

you two had a routine of who did what in terms of “chores”

usually shuri washed your clothes for you. you genuinely never asked her to do it, but she always did it because she was sweet like that.

for her, you would clean up the room.

it’s a healthy balance, and considering y’all are friends, it’s not awkward at all.

you two also eat lunch and dinner together all the time, and usually one of you pays for lunch, the other pays for dinner.

this only became a thing because you hated shuri paying for meals all the time, and so she thought it’d be a better idea for there to be equal playing.

so yeah, y’all live in peace and harmony for a while!

until she’s starting to get comfortable around other people on campus

you can’t blame her bc you literally were the one to give her advice on feeling comfortable around everyone

and since she’s known for being a princess, it’s expected to get attention from people.

but she definitely starts enjoying this attention

don’t get me wrong, she’s humble

but now she’s comfortable with... other girls.

you weren’t worried about guys, honestly.

guys were like. always shut down by her to begin with

or they just saw her as “one of the boys” (a cringe term, but a truthful one)

but because shuri was incredibly attractive, carried herself in a masculine way but knew how to be respectful to women because she is one

all of the girls are falling head over heels for her.

shuri is lowkey oblivious to this too.

like, one time you had dinner alone, some cheap chinese food on fry street or whatever,

you had told shuri but she didn’t even respond. kinda hurt too because y’all loved getting chinese food from this spot on friday nights.

so you’re back at the dorm, probably watching pose on your bed (it’s a very angsty show.. makes sense on why you would watch it.)

eating the chinese food.

and here comes shuri coming back into your dorm with a girl.

yes, you heard me,

a mfkn girl.

now y’all aren’t officially together so you couldn’t say shit but at the same time it’s like, mf you always text me back whenever i tell you plans????? why didn’t you do it this time???

she’s looking at you like ‘oh shit’

and you’re like

“yeah u done goofed, alright.”

and this girl she done brought to y’alls dorm is talkin bout some

“uh.. you didn’t tell me your roommate would be here.. your roommate is a majorette?”

so now this girl has a bone to pick with you as a majorette??? girl huh???

“uh, yeah. i hope that’s not a problem.. i just thought we could watch a movie or something.” shuri is freaking out like craaazy in her head

“..nah, that’s cool. text me later, shuri.” before you know it, that girl was GONE.

the silence between you and shuri is mad awkward now

literally you gotta be the first one to speak

“my text message wasn’t good enough to reply to?” your tone? bitter as hell.

shuri is cringing now bc she KNEW you were gonna bring that up.

“i swear my phone died. i was at a party.” oh shes going to PARTIES without YOU, now???? psh thats CRAZY

because you’re known for usually going to a house party but this time you wanted to chill at the dorm.

“a party, huh? you didn’t ask if i was gonna go?”

“you usually go, so i didn’t think to ask.”

“so now you just assuming?”

the way you two are responding to each other so quickly now is unreal. that’s how you know some shit is going down.

“i don’t see why it matters so much, i want to experience college life too.”

dammit, she has a point.

all you can do is stare at her.

“look, i’m here now, we can just watch whatever-”

“nah, too late now. i’m going to bed.” petty ass reader, you. you want her to KNOW you’re heartbroken 😭

shuri isn’t budging anymore. she can clearly see you don’t want to engage in conversation anymore.

you turn your laptop off, and don’t even bother plugging it in because you’re just so mad.

you turn off that lamp on your side of the room, and you pull them covers over you mad hard and turn around so she can’t see you.

mind you, she’s watching you do all of this.

it’s about twenty minutes of silence. you’re awake during all of this.

now theres some extra weight on your bed.

can you guess what it is?

hint, it’s shuri climbing into your bed to come cuddle you.

“look, i know i fucked up. usually i don’t mess up and not respond like this. i guess i’m just desperate to fit in, especially since this culture is so much different than mine. i want to experience it.” shes whispering in your ear now.

she stops talking for a moment to see if you’ll say anything, but you stay silent to keep pretending that you’re asleep. you can hear her lightly breathing, and god, does it send shivers down your spine.

“i guess i screwed over the person who showed me all of this stuff in the first place. i enjoy being roommates with you, your company is amazing and i wouldn’t want it any other way.”

you hear her stop for a moment, and her breathing stops with it. now she’s choosing her next words carefully.

“i know you’re awake. you don’t have to say anything, but just know, i really appreciate you.”

smooch.

this girl fr kissed your cheek.

now you can sleep in peace.

...

do you see why being roommates with her would be absolutely dramatic, now?

#shuri #shuri udaku #shuri udaku x reader #shuri x reader #shuri x black!reader #hbcu!shuri #black reader #headcanons #headcanon #sam answers asks #sam is obsessed with shuri #princess shuri

[captain-mj]

I absolutely adore your writing, you got me majorly hooked on PriceGraves and I thank you for that 🫶 I'm offering my first born child and my liver for some hurt/comfort with PriceGraves, you carry the ship so much and ily for that 😭🫶

Cw: pet death, im still working through stuff

Price tapped his pen against his desk over and over again. They were having another meeting to try to work out a deal with Graves.

Unfortunately, they were having to pay him for information. Luckily, Graves really just wanted compensation for his services that were used since Shepherd wouldn’t be paying him if they worked together.

“It’s a huge hit to my reputation if it gets out i told people secrets about my clients. I need to make it seem like he stiffed payment so i had to go somewhere else. Plus, i have to keep my men paid.” Graves had explained the first day of these meetings. “I have proof I’m not getting paid so you guys are going to pay me.”

Laswell and Price were both unhappy about this, it took a lot of strings and desperation, but they got it. This was the last meeting.

And when it was over, Price could go back to John, Graves’s boyfriend, when they hung out. God he missed that. He was tired of having to be careful around each other in case they risked tainting the deal. All words had to be kept professional, couldn’t be caught speaking publicly right now.

“He’s late.” Laswell frowned. “He’s never late.”

Price checked the time and sure enough, it was three minutes past their meeting time.

As if on cue, Mila knocked and waited to be let in.

She seemed tense, barely really looking at them. “I do apologize, Commander Graves wants to reschedule.”

Laswell and Price glanced at each other. “Why? Did he get a counter offer?”

“No. We’re still going through with our deal. Something has come up.”

“Shepherd is loose and could be colluding with anyone. We need the information Graves has.” Price insisted.

Mila tensed her jaw. “I’m sorry, Captain. But Graves is in no condition to continue these conversations. As soon as he's able, he'll be back."

Laswell frowned, picking up on her verbiage. "Is he okay?"

Price's stomach dropped.

"Mila?"

Mila hesitated. "He's not injured. Really, this is something he should handle."

Price frowned and called Graves. No response. "Kate."

"Yeah, John. Go."

He pulled on his coat and followed after Mila who looked embarrassed. "Don't let him know I let this slip. He'll be so upset."

not angry

upset

Price frowned. "What happened?"

"You know Dumpling?"

"His shih tzu. Six years old. Darling little thing."

"She had a heart condition. Some birth defect. It got her last night."

Oh. Oh no.

"She isn't...."

"She died. He found her body when he woke up. Please don't be mad he didn't message you, none of us found out until we went to his room to find out why he wasn't out yet."

As if Price would be mad at him for that.

His poor boyfriend was dealing with this alone. Well. He doubted the Shadows really left him alone. But he still wanted to be there for him.

Mila led him to where the base nearby was. It was a cheap hotel that had been bought by Graves and renovated to fit their needs. Every single door had a small dog door for Dumpling to run around except for the gun area and the shooting range.

Graves had made his room in one of the slightly larger areas, one that had a small kitchen in it. He only ever made himself coffee there, but Price occasionally cooked.

And in his room, he found him curled up tight. A small box sat on the table. It was a simple, plain box. Probably from someone packing. A quick look inside at the fragile body there, unmoving and unseeing. He quickly looked away and back towards Graves.

Oz was comforting him, speaking to him in low voices something that sounded reassuring. About rainbow bridges or something.

Price smiled at him thankfully and then wrapped Graves in his arms. He tucked him under his jaw and felt Graves give a full body sob.

"I woke up and she was just there. Laying on my bed. She wouldn't wake up." Graves sobbed harder.

Price bundled him to his chest and squeezed him. "Get it all out, Love."

Graves buried his face in John's chest and wailed. it was heavy and angry and so loud. Price just held him tighter.

He was trying his best to not cry. Dumpling wasn't his dog, but still, it got to him.

His poor love.

"I raised her. Bottle fed her after her surgeries. I thought I had more time." Graves sniffled and scratched at Price's shoulders like a wild animal.

Oz made coffee silently. He brought a cup to them and Price helped Graves sit up. "Love, it's pretty late in the day. Have you eaten?"

Graves shook his head. "No."

"Oz, get something easy for him."

Oz gave a small salute and stepped back, trusting Price to keep Graves together.

Price rocked him gently, letting him just lay there as long as he needed. He helped him eat, gently bringing bites of food to his mouth and letting Graves eat at his own pace. Tears never stopped streaming down his face, but food definitely helped.

"What am I going to do?"

"I don't know, sweetheart." Price answered honestly. "You're going to be okay though."

Graves sobbed. "I don't think so."

#cod #call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #Phillip graves #Price x Graves #Graves x Price

[sistervirtue]

the barbie movie like. ok so [spoilers and long paragraphs under the cut]

yeah it was really basic ideologically it didnt cover all the various intersections and theories of feminism but i think when people saw conservatives flipping their shit people expected it to be like, a manifesto. its a film, and more importantly, it's the Barbie Movie. i think expecting a gender and womens studies class from it would be silly, and while i get why people are disappointed in how much sympathy it lends to the men in the movie, i dont think like, once again, that was ever something to not expect?

furthermore on that point i think showing misogyny from a place of defining the self around a sense of loneliness by men isn't...far off. theres never an excuse for misogyny but thats rhetoric that radicalizes a lot of incels and shit i would rather that than they treat it like some mysterious miasma.

also, i think, once again while it was pretty basic in the ideas it presented... how often is it show that explicitly in broad-audience film? like stated directly to the audience in that manner? theres no flirting with the feminist theory in the movie; it says it outright, which is something a lot of films shy away from out of fear of alienating men once it becomes too "girl power"-y. im not usually for the use of a lot of buzzwords in film and discussion of issues but these buzzwords are never said with cheapness or to obfuscate. it could be heavyhanded at times, but that heavyhandedness wasnt ever really obnoxious? it walked the line of "haha silly" but still took its point seriously enough that you could appreciate the use of that heavyhandedness for comedic effect without being mocked

i also think the fact they just like "solve" the patriarchy in the barbie world isnt meant to imply that you can just fix the real world with a woman president or by being aware of misogyny. in fact a lot of the movie is dedicated to showing how the barbie world and real world are different. the conclusion of the movie is that barbie wants to become human, even though the human world is messy and unsolved and nothing like she assumed it was. she believed barbie had solved misogyny forever, which is a direct jab at the idea that any "one thing" or "girl power" movement can just suddenly whisk away the very power structures that created that sort of oppression.

its very much coming from a cis/heterosexual/white basis. they flirt with further intersection but dont commit, which im really not a fan of. my friends after the film were like "it was more homoerotic than i expected haha" and...yeah, it was, but it didnt do anything to address gayness or what that means in such a heavily gendered heterosexual society. you could read that subtext through allen and his thing.... but allen is a joke. his story is never resolved. hes one of the guys but he isnt, hes one of the girls but he isnt, he benefits not at all from "kendom" but conversely is not oppressed the way the barbies are and vice versa. he's just allen, and the only allen there is. when sasha and her mom want to go back to help barbie, the fact he just goes "God im never getting out of here" and thats just like, left was kinda. well. it was something for sure.

still. i know i just wrote like 200 words on the ideology of this movie but first and foremost its a pg13 comedy meant to be shown to broad audiences in theaters for money. its meant to be an enjoyable watch, and it is! its a gorgeous film, its funny, the songs are fine, and the way it makes its side comments arent distracting nor meanspirited. it knows when to take itself seriously, and i like that. i was actually expecting it to be a general audiences like, kids movie i was so fucking surprised when barbie said penis.

i also think saying the line at the end about the gynecologist is like "saying you need a vagina to be a real woman" is disingenuous honestly. one its meant to be a bit of a shock quip to get a giggle but two i think a lot of people who need gynecological care (which can include trans women) are afraid when it comes to that first visit and finally sitting down and talking about those areas because of the shame and lack of proper education. maybe its bc i grew up mormon but i dont think its meant to imply thats what MADE barbie a real woman or that its fundamental to being one.

once again it definitely isnt a perfect movie. i think the way the ken and barbie talk happened at the end was still a bit coddly and the scope of the ideology underneath the movie was, once again, still very much centered in white cishetero society and thought with only passing mentions of intersectionality that felt both shallow and (especially with the gayness and racial dynamics) occasionally like it was being turned into a joke

still all in all it was a pretty good movie. weird barbie #1. allen get behind me i will protect u

#barbie movie #barbie movie spoilers

[traumacat800]

Every Kiss Begins with Kill♡

okay so my story was taken down on a03 and my account was suspended for “abuse”. I literally don’t know why. I’m actually very angry about it and if I wasn’t going to jump off then I’m going to jump off now. So I’ll just be uploading the chapters here on tumblr.

Im honestly sorry about this folks, I really am. But I’m already living on the edge and a03 takes forever to fix problems so I might just stay on tumblr. This one isn’t as edited as the original because I usually do the formatting and stuff IN A03. So this is copied straight out of google docs. I know it’s not exactly convenient but this is what we have to work with 😕 I’m sorry yall

Now! Onto the first chapter!

No TW for the first chapter! (I think)

•

It was the big day.

Today was Halloween. 

You had to admit, you were excited, not for the costumes or cool decorations, more for the candy. It was always the candy. Last year, you couldn’t go trick or treating due to your dog being sick. You decided to stay home and watch over poor Brazen to make sure she didn’t pass. You didn’t regret it though, thankfully candy was cheap and the next day you went down to the dollar store and rewarded yourself with a big bag of lollipops. So as must do on Halloween day, you put on your costume and went outside. You dressed up as something not too overly complicated. It was a bit hot under the costume but you knew it might be cold.  Your mother reminded you to be safe before you left the house. 

You walked down the street happily, collecting candy from your neighbors. Although you felt you were a bit too old to be doing this, especially as a high school student. Your shame quickly faded when you saw just how full your candy bag really was. All that walking paid off, although you were a bit out of breath. It wasn’t surprising considering you couldn’t even run that one lap in PE. For someone who played sports, you were really out of shape. You couldn’t run for the life of you, not commenting on the fact that if you walked too much you also were somehow out of breath.

You happily stopped at the side of the sidewalk to examine your candy (and to catch your breath). You had a lot of Jolly Ranchers, your favorite flavor was grape but you thought blue was good as well. You had chocolate too of course, but you had more Snickers than Jolly Ranchers at this point. You settled for a few of the grape Jolly Ranchers, pulling out your phone, you watch TimeWatch (tiktok) for a bit before deciding to keep going. You stood up, stretching then you headed onto the next neighborhood, I mean, your bag wasn’t completely full yet. It’s not like God would get on you for taking advantage of the gifts of other people. 

“Hey is that Y/n?” A voice called out.

“I think so,” One responded.

“Oh god…” Another voice replied.

Oh yeah, he would.

Fuck.

Gluttony is a sin.

God dammit.

•

As per usual, your friends were absolute assholes. They made you feel unwanted, as if they didn’t want you to be there. Whenever you needed groups, they find some way to exclude you unless you did the work for them. They had no idea how smart you really were. You supposed it was their loss but still, they made you feel some type of way. So you left early, you just slipped away. They didn’t even notice, you didn’t think they ever did. It always hurts you to think about it, the fact that it even still surprises you.. You assumed they’d finally accepted you, but it stayed the same. 

You huffed, making your way back down the neighborhood. It was completely dark now, the temperature was a bit cold. You could feel the breeze on your face, you shivered a bit at it. However, you thought you’d saw something behind you, you brushed it off as you being paranoid. You didn’t blame yourself, it was cold and dark outside. You were almost home, you only had to pass through one more neighborhood before you got to your house. The neighborhood lights in front of you flickered ominously. There stood a man, he was large and red with long horns on the top of his head.

That’s when you heard it—

“Did you know that the human body tastes similar to pork?”

You were terrified for 10 seconds before realizing that he was probably just another trick or treater trying to scare you.

“Uh no? Nice costume by the way,” You said before casually walking away. 

He stopped in front of you once more. 

“Did you know that ribs are the hardest part for the average person to pull out?” 

Maybe they just were just very dedicated to the character. Probably a Game of Thrones fan. 

“Who are you dressed up as?”

“Mmh…a murderer….”  His voice was deep, it was smooth almost like soft velvet or tissue. It made you feel a sense of anxiety, I mean, you just met the guy. Somehow, you thought he was hot, classic you. 

It was kind of attractive if you thought about it. Nothing you couldn’t control though. 

He must be a horror fan, cool. 

“Cool, I thought you were the devil. You know, with the horns and stuff,” You pointed to his horns and shrugged.

He continued to breathe heavily, that’s when you noticed he didn’t have any candy. 

“Hey man, you don’t have any candy. You want some of mine?,” You said, offering your bag to him. He grabbed it slowly, picking up a piece of candy. (Specifically a blue Jolly rancher, the man had taste apparently) He ate it with the wrapper on and then smiled creepily at your terrified face. Perhaps you realized who he really was—-

“Did you just eat that with the wrapper on?” 

He stopped and looked at you. In fact, he looked confused. Who took the wrapper off? You grabbed another blue Jolly Rancher, you opened it right in front of him. He stared at you, still a bit confused at the point you were making. You shook your head, handing the candy over to him. He looked at you once more, giving you a skeptical look. He sighed and put it in his mouth. A burst of favor immediately hit him, the demon looked shocked. As if he was learning a great discovery. You, on the other hand, laughed at him. 

“You’re funny man,” Shaking your hand once more, you handed him an armful of candy. 

“I’ll see you around,”

And with that you headed home.

•

Bob was pissed.

It was his FIRST failed murder of the day, Halloween had just begun, it was only 10 pm. The kids didn’t shut down till about 1 am. Still, it really did make him think about you. He didn’t even get to pull out his knife before you were offering him something. There’s no way you knew who he was. Not with how chill you were acting about it. His usual smile dropped into a somewhat confused look. You’d left by now.

All Bob had to do was go through the other neighborhood, the more popular ones would sure have possible victims.

But he couldn’t help finding himself thinking about going after you. 

#bob velseb x reader #Every Kiss Begins With Kill #yandere bob x reader #yandere bob velseb #bob velseb #spooky month bob #spooky month #spooky month 5 #bob x reader

[sweetlikehoneystingslikeabee]

Happy Valentine's Day! I'd like to request date night hcs for Black Mask and a fem!reader. Someone else hits on the reader - not realizing they're hitting on the Black Mask's s/o - and Roman gets jealous and possessive about it.

Reader is a sweetheart and Roman is very protective of her and likes to spoil her, but she can also be a bit of brat sometimes. Do with that what you will ;).

"What's mine is NOT yours" - Black Mask x F!reader (Valentine's Event 2024)

Happy late Valentine's Day! The whole month of February is about love it's fine. This is for the (now over) Valentine's Day Event. Also riiiiip that dude.

TW: NSFW, harassment, creep that doesn't want to hear no, possessiveness, jealousy

It was a fairly average date night apart from it being Valentine's Day. You'd had a light dinner with Roman wherein he gave you flowers, a flattering necklace and a promise to fuck stars into your eyes once you got home. After all, you were such a sweet little thing, how could he resist? You were kind, not only to him but to others. Made him protective that others could take advantage.

And you were loyal to him, in every sense.

This was to be tested as you were walking back from the bathroom. Eyes clung to you and as you turned, there was a stranger leaning over you. Grinning.

"Can I help you?" You asked directly.

The man got closer in your space, " Yeah I uh, lost my number. Can I have yours?"

"...That's your opener?" Your eyes roll, "I have a boyfriend, sorry." You were smiling half-heartedly. Already amused thinking of telling this story to other people.

It was when the man grabbed your arm that you stopped smiling. He was still going strong, "No, no, listen- I'm sorry. You're just. I saw you going in and I just think you're really cute-" Cheap alcohol on his breath.

"I really do have a boyfriend, I need to get back to him before he starts to worry." You iterate slowly. The man doesn't seem to be a threat. But as many know, even a creep who isn't a threat can become one quickly in the wrong circumstance.

"Baby, I can make you forget aaaaaall about 'im." The man is swaying before trying to be seductive in your ear. Incomprehensible nonsense that surpassed the vile.

That was when you shoved him off, "I said no."

It was then you were both surrounded by Roman's personal security on either side. Keeping the guy out of your orbit. Grabbing him by the scruff. Asking if you're okay. Once you give them confirmation, they're bringing you back to your table. Roman looks... anxious.

The man looks more anxious. Trying to spout out what happened while you calmly went over the short interaction. Afterwards, you then take your seat next to your boyfriend, feeling safe again. His knee brushes yours, a subtle reassurance that he's there. Yet his eyes never leave the stranger.

"So you wanna fuck my girl?" He says simply, "I mean ey. What's mine is yours, right?"

"No- No, I uh- I really didn't know. I'm so sorry." The man pales considerably and is waving his hands in front of him.

Roman pulls his pistol out on the table, "You didn't seem to care much when you thought it was some other guy."

"Please, I'm so sorry ma'am and mr. Black Mask, I'll never do it again, I swear to GOD-"

You can see Roman's grip tight on his gun. Hand just ghosting over the trigger. The man is sweating and looks as though he might get sick. As a kindness, you scoot your chair closer to your boyfriend, lean your head on his shoulder and put one hand firmly on his thigh.

You whisper, "I really think he's sorry, don't you?" A squeeze. Roman grunts. His grip loosens.

As he puts the gun away, he waves his hand, "Get ridda this guy. You see him again, break his fuckin' ankle." Just like that, the man who had been flirting with you is weeping thank you's towards you both as the grunts drag him away.

"That was nice of you." You almost purr.

"That's me. A nice fuckin' guy. Don't I get a reward for being such a sweet guy?" He's demanding your lips on his neck and mask which you oblige in kindly. He sighs, "You alright?"

You stop for a moment, "I'm good now. Just got scary for a second. Not the fun kind."

That made him laugh, "No? What's the fun kind?"

For a moment you genuinely think on it. Then you put your body flush to his, "If you'd walked over instead of your guards and you had to... show him who I belonged to."

"Oh? You would have wanted that? That's fun?" He's grabbing your hand and pressing it to his pants against his hard cock, "You think it's fun when I fuck you to tell everybody else to back off?"

You shudder, "Y-yeah... Love being yours-" You're almost tempted to start something here, now.

"You love it? Cute. That's my sweet thing." Then he's pulling away, "Be careful, I might fuck you on a table next time."

A mild groan of disappointment, "Tease."

The two of you laughed while he hailed down for the check. Both of you were riled up and the night was young. You felt safe and he felt secure. There was no doubt as the two of you left for the night that were in love. It would become a story whispered in rumor for why you never hit on Black Mask's girlfriend.

#roman sionis x f!reader #black mask x f!reader #black mask #roman sionis #suggestive #foxwriting #foxy valentines event

[blindmagdalena]

i been listening to too much lana del rey, and You Can Be The Boss drives me so insane like it fits homelander so well in my mind GRAHHH. imagine being some employee for vought, not too low but not too high up. youre at a vought hosted party, supes and all that but you never really cared for that; after all, you only took this job because it paid well. the company party was mandatory but to be honest you were just looking for a chance to escape and go home. the dress you had on was too tight, the smell of alcohol and all the fake laughter overwhelmed your senses when you didnt even drink much. stumbling in the crowd of well dressed business men and gorgeous women, you walk straight into him, the homelander. he doesnt know why you really caught his attention, maybe he could tell you didnt belong among the crowd of money hungry business people and drunk out of their mind supes, or maybe the tight dress just complimented your figure a bit too well for him to brush you off. he doesnt make it obvious at first, he just laughs and assures you that you didnt cause him trouble by walking into him, "woah, you better watch your step dear... you alright?" he puts his hand on your waist although he knows you dont need help balancing yourself anymore. he really just wants your scent to last longer on him. like a bloodhound, later through the night he'll try to find you through the crowd of people, tracking the smell of that cheap perfume you wore. he finds you by some desk makeshifted into a well made table for the night, drink in hand he approaches you. "ah, you! youre the uh, the girl who walked into me earlier, right?" he asks even though he damn well knows the answer.

"oh, god, im so sorry about that, sir... i wasnt paying attention and-"

"oh, please... dont be sorry! hell, i should be thanking you for saving me from those black ties... ah, i never caught your name..."

although youre completely starstruck you manage to make some small talk, mentioning somewhere along the way that he was your favorite hero. he practically shows his smirk at this point.

"oh, please... what, you young people are still into classic supes like me?" he fucking knows the answer but he needs his ego stroked.

as you answer he leans over, grabbing a cocktail napkin (also using this as a sneaky opportunity to look over at your tits, just to see if hes really gonna do this.) and pulling out a pen, he carries one around everywhere just in case a fan comes up to him.

"c'mon... ill give you an autograph... ah, after this i have to go and y'know... give the big toast..." he practically sighs it out.

youre completely flattered... and, yeah, a little weirded out but hey, free autograph.

he hands back the now folded napkin, walking back into the crowd, cape flowing behind him as you lose sight of the red white and blue.

unfolding the napkin, you see written clearly his perfect signature.... under it, a phone number.

[AHHHH IVE NEVER WRITTEN ANYTHING BEFORE AND I GOT CARRIED AWAY IM SORRY] i also didnt proof read so sorry if anything is misspelled!!

You hold on to that number for a couple of days, looking at it every so often. There's a new undertone of anxiety at work; suddenly you're nervous about running into him, even though it's never happened before. You don't work anywhere near the 99th floor, and yet there's a constant prickle at the back of your neck, the presence of the napkin in your pocket a constant reminder.

The feeling follows you home. You can't shake it, you can't stop thinking about it. About him. You pull out the napkin just to stare at it sometimes, to remind yourself that really happened. Why the hell would The Homelander give a nobody like you his number?

On the evening of the third day, thoroughly plagued by this accursed napkin burning a hole in your pocket, you finally call the number elegantly scrawled across it. It rings once, twice, thrice. Your heart is pounding so hard you can barely hear the ringing. There's a click, and your heart stops. You hear an amused huff of breath on the other end of the line in place of a greeting. "I was beginning to think you were blowing me off," Homelander says, but you think you can hear the smile in his voice. Your mouth feels dry, full of cotton. "No, no, I wasn't, uhm... Sorry, I would have called sooner, I was just—" "Nervous?" Homelander cuts in. His voice is low, and feels unbelievably intimate in your ear. You bite your tongue, feeling a flush crawl up your chest. "Don't be nervous, sweetheart. I'm glad you called."

You try to laugh it off, try to regain an ounce of calm. This guy really is larger than life, even over the phone. "Yeah? Why's that?" "Because I have not been able to get you off my mind," he purrs. You can't see the absent way he's flipping a pen, the same one he used to sign that napkin, between his fingers. Just like you couldn't see the way he has been watching you through the floors and walls of Vought tower, or in your own home, how his lips would twitch every time you pulled out that napkin to stare at his signature, and his phone number. Fuck, the fact you carried around that napkin everywhere haunted him. The way you would take it out just to stare or run your fingers along the writing was damn near reverent. The look of worship in your clueless eyes, totally unaware your god was watching you in your moment of prayer, was almost too much for him. Still, he remained patient, and now it's finally paying off. As all worthwhile hunts do. Caught off guard, you stammer, mouth opening and closing. "I, uhm, I've been thinking about you, too," you say. Your tongue feels clumsy, like a brick of lead in your mouth. "I really enjoyed meeting you that night."

"Well, I would hope so. You did tell me that I'm your favorite," he goes on. God, is he flirting with you, or trying to humiliate you? You're not sure which is worse. Your whole body feels hot, and your brain simply refuses to work correctly. "I'd just love to hear more about you." "So, like... Coffee?" You offer. Your hand is starting to tingle from how tightly you're gripping your phone. Is this really happening? You just asked The Homelander for a coffee date. "Not really a coffee kind of guy," Homelander replies. "How about dinner? My apartment in Vought Tower, tomorrow night. You like steak?" "Oh, okay, I— yes, I do," you fumble slightly, clearing your throat. "That'd be nice," you say, cleaning up your tone, attempting to gain any semblance of composure in this conversation. "Perrrrrfect," he rumbles. The near growl of his voice right in your ear makes you feel a touch faint. Jesus Christ. He must know exactly what he's doing. "It's a date." "It's a date," you echo, as if to confirm for yourself that's really true. "Okay, I will... see you soon." "You have a good night. Be seein' you." The line disconnects, and you're left in the too-loud silence of your apartment, staring at your phone in disbelief Holy shit.

#homelander x reader #homelander x you #THIS WAS SOOO GOOD ANON I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND THAT I RAN WITH IT #my voice kink has been activated i am in desperate need of devoted voice kink fic now omg #WAIT i think i still have an ask about voice kink in my inbox.... #ask and you shall receive #darling anon #my writing #i'm sorry the ask is so long that it apparently breaks read-more's dfghj #every time i add one in it just deletes it #voice kink

[frostbite-the-bat]

WHAT AN AMAZING COLLECTION !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love the dragons protecting the display OOOOOOOUGH SHARKS TEETH YEAAAAAAAAA Do you have any specific favorites? (& What about them said Pick Me to you? (i love rocks sm but have none space so i only have a lil bag of my own) )

YESS!!! THANK YUOU!!! and ofc i gotta have dragons B)

and HMMM OKAY lemme THInks

so *now* pick and buy gems at trinket stores whenver i go travelling and see any tha i just dont own yet (or if theres a piece that's really pretty to me that i DO have, but it's just unique and cool and i want it)

but back then id just..! buy whatever was Cool to me . id always buy so many at once my god

my favorites are defo my extra silly fancy lookin gems!! lemme show em here (older pics) (some are fancier bc i took them for my personal collection list google doc)

bismuth!!

these quartz! i was told they are some type of quartz! these are special to me because i got them a year ago during a school trip to germany - i only had a few euros on me and i ended up spending it all on gems. we checked out the christmas markets and there was an friendly old fellow who was selling gemstones and other things! he even had a cutter and could speak english. we chatted a bit and i listened to him talk about things (like how these lil fellas are formed. i know nothing about chemicals but i just think these things are interesting!!!! i actually get most my gems from giftshops near cave tours because i love visiting them and think it's interesting ^^

anyways he had a little box of various "rocks" that could possibly be geodes that he'd cut and see if they are! the price depended on their size. he said that i could guess with the weight and feel of the "rock" and let me pick from a few that could possible be ones. i said it didn't matter to me if it's gonna be hollow or not, since it's cool to me anyways!

so while my classmates waited and stared at me i just watched this guy cut it nicely in half like this - and he then even cut the smaller flatter piece of it, too. it was very nice! it's also where i bought the tooth, the bismuth, and some other things that i forgot as well... oops. i got a lot of gems

this shimmery pretty goldstone / aventurine glass ! wacky picture quality but i don't feel like getting new pics (+ im on pc now) (lie: i ended up getting new pics later)

. it's a man-made lil' mineral, but it's very lovely regardless! i honestly only care about the "realness" only i it's a scam of some sort. any rock, trinket, gem or mineral, man-made or not is very niceys to me. (i still want an opal tho i only got an opalite which was mislabeled. i dont think on purpose since these stores sometimes accidentally mislabel or misspell things. or use czech names which gets confusing. yeah i may have inaccurate names for some of my gems but i try my best to be accurate. im no pro im just a collector little beast)

some type of peacock ore! (either treated chalcopyrite or bornite, as i've previously written down. i'll trust my past self)

aura quartz! one of my first 3 pieces ive ever gotten that sparked my collection

all of these little fellas i bought at the same place for really cheap! filled my lil collection quite a bitso. i loves tghem. theyre like cereal To Me

in order: garnet, carnelian, emerald, tusquoise (why isnt this one in my list. oh my god how many gems did i miss. i still have a few to add that ill list on the list later that i need to re-check what gems they are. lord.) opalite, chalcedony, snowflake obsidian, obsidian (?), onyx. + not pictured an aquamarine which...? i cant find? im not checking if i put it behind a bigger gem and i cant FIND IT.

i really need to do a new and better gem list . oops. i cant always rely on my memory for these names

my EYES! in order: tiger's eye 2x, hawk's eye, bull's eye

my funny silly mosly multicolor fellas idk they fit the Vibes. i likes thgem (appreciae this secion i had to make sure and like re-identify half of these but i still could be incorrect)

in ORDER... lapis lazuli, sodalite 2x, elbaite (most likely), chrysocolla, rhodonite, blue apatite, amazonite, kyanite

dalmatian jasper and unakite

...some kinda jasper?

so ya!! thats some of my Rocks. this took a while bc i had to look what some of these are again @_@ i loaves them . todays guzma enrichment: this

#[answered] #guz rock tag #<- FOR FUTURE REFERENCE.

[vampirepersay]

The smell of cheap strawberry car air fresheners and greasy fast food entered butters nose as Eric handed Butterss back his wallet after using his money to pay for their meal.

"Really Bro hello kitty wallet what are you a five-year-old girl"? Eric says 

"hey, Hello Kitty's gender neutral!" 

"Whatever you say, Gaylord" Eric replies before finding an empty parking spot for the two to eat their food 

After a few minutes of the two eating, the only thing breaking their silence was eric's occasional complaint about whatever happened to be pissing him off today, Eric said something that surprised Butterss who while listening was more so focusing on his meal until he heard something come out of erics mouth that was shocking, to say the least.

"So you know Kyle's annoying ass cousin?" 

"yeah who could forget someone like that, but what about him". 

"he's a chick now". Said Eric with clear range in his voice. 

"I'm sorry what!"Replied butters he was genuinely shocked. It's not like he had anything against trans people, hell he didn't even have anything against kyle's cousin other than finding her a little annoying. 

"yeah you heard me right, he's claiming his a chick now it's so fucking funny dude"! Said Eric laughing as if it was some hilarious joke and not someone's identity he just made fun of.

"I don't see why you're laughing Eric. That's not funny, it probably was really hard for her to come out, and honestly good for her. I'm glad she has the confidence to do that; it must have been a default thing to say". Replies butters with sadness in his voice he knows Eric could be judgmental but transphobia that was just immature and rude". 

"what do you mean her don't tell me you believe this bullshit butters come fucking on!". Eric yelled back in a fury 

"What do you mean bullshit? I see nothing wrong with what she's doing! Yelled back butter he could feel his face heating up from anger 

"This she your defending so much has a fucking dick butters" replied Eric.

"I don't see why that matters Eric, why are you so obsessed with Kyle's cousin's genitals anyways?

Butters answers back, his voice getting louder than he expected it to.

"what's gotten into me you're the one going out of your way to defend some tranny!".

" Wait a second butters I knew you were a total fag but are you a fucking tranny too?

Eric says while laughing 

"what no of course im not!" 

Replies butters his voice, shaking tears begin to form in his eyes.

If your not then why the fuck are you crying?

Eric replied his anger still very clearly lacing his voice 

"Because, umm because". Butters 

 stuttered out unable to make words. 

"spit it out tranny".

Eric replies not phased by the tears in his friend's eyes 

"I think I may be a trans girl okay"

Butters replies in the smallest whisper he physically can 

"What was that, I'm sorry I couldn't hear you, you're going to have to repeat it, tranny this time say loud enough so that I can actually hear you. Eric says mockingly, putting his hands around his ear. 

"I THINK I MAY BE A TRANS GIRL, YOU GOD DANM FATASS. Butters yells.

#south park #south park fanfiction #sp butters #butters leopold stotch #eric cartman #eric theodore cartman #butters stotch #trans butters #kyle schwartz #Transfemkyleschwatz #Transfembutters

[snaileo]

Top 5 batshit characters you’ve encountered

in Nooooo particular order...hmmm i really gotta think about this cuz i feel there are Easy ones i could list. but then again this isnt objective, nor do i need to dig deep for this to be a nice list. 1. Umataro Tenma

Of course I feel the first i should mention is Umataro Tenma. like I can't start this list off any other way, this man recreated his own son in the form of a robot and then abandoned him when his senses came to him ( but they left as soon as they showed bc man was back on his bullshit next day) like truly. Batshit King. and thats only his most well know Shit. like this one time he deliberately went back in time, i dont even remember what for, i think it was steal the not Yet Awake atom, and his younger self SEES HIM and LIGHTS HIM UP. theyre BOTH batshit young and old

like. i feel like we dont talk about how tenma was strapped enough.

2. Terry Silver

The next batshit queen on my mind recently is none other than Terry Silver. It Is Very Normal And Well Adjusted Behavior to terrorize a teenager, torturing him physically and emotionally, all because your Bestie, Your Cinnamon Fucking Apple, told you to. You know. Very Normal Behavior for people in their idk. 40s. Dude is a coked up billionaire and he wanted to play the part of Humble Down to earth man so well that he bought a beat up truck, all just to fuck with daniel.

And Oh Totally normal to go through extensive therapy, turning your life around and overcoming it all, only for it all to be undone because?? Oh?? My Wrongdoings CAnnot BE UNDONE??? BY SAYING IM SORRY???" like the moment he realized daniel wasnt gonna accept his sorry ass excuse it was Over. 30 years of therapy down the toilet.

3. Diva

Here's a more tragic one. The me from 6 years ago would kill me right now for even posting her face because I use to be SUCH a stickler for spoilers regarding her but idc right now

ANYWAY shes for real batshit and shes one of those characters who you can be sympathetic towards, the tragedy of knowing how she got to be this way but god you deserve everything coming to you. There are many things she does as truly batshit but an often forgotten one is stealing the shoes of a man she just killed. And she's later shown putting them on, before continuing her killing spree and doing something that altered the trajectory of the story forever

she also has an operatic voice, which her singing alone is an omen for bad things to come

4. The Monarch

This is a more recent one as rock had showed me The Venture Brothers and i hate this man. I hate him and i love him. I don't have much to say other than i want to bully him I genuinely want to bully him

hes just so pathetic. he didnt want rusty getting therapy because he couldnt shit on his day , because well...he was in therapy and theres rules, so he killed his therapist so he'd be free. to. Shit on his day like i dont kno waht to tell you.

5.Hannibal

this one may feel cheap but understand that like. him being batshit is the greatest thing ever .and hes def one of my favs in terms of being batshit. he made the show such a wild ride and like Cookie I am Looking at you we WILL watch Hannibal (tv show) idk wanna say anything else for spoilers but yeah theres some batshit characters for u

#long post #honorable mention goes to all the women from Black Lagoon

[upagainstthesunset]

Kate update!

I had the day off so ran some errands, then took a few hours to hit up three stores that have back issue comics. Sometimes it's a total strikeout bc two of the places just have random dollar bin stuff, and the third place is more complete but also kind of expensive.

BUT on this day of days I ended up picking up a ton of stuff!!!!!! I got a whole mess of Flash comics, and I started collecting Impulse bc they were so cheap and not the most common and the plan was always to get going on those after the Flash run. I also finally found the Swamp Thing issue w Metron in it, as well as the New Gods story by Evanier that gives Metron a love interest (kinda lol). And they had the tpb of Bug so I bought that too. This visit really crossed a lot off my shortlist of stuff to find. Now i just need to come across that one Spectre comic in the wild.

[Image: Photo of many comics fanned out on a table. There are ten from Flash volume 2, 7 from Impulse, and single issues from New Gods and Swamp Thing. On top is a trade paper back of Bug the Adventures of Forager. /End]

The first store I went to is a used book store and theyve always got really cool, eclectic stuff and everything is hella cheap. It's a local fave and everyone who works there is interesting and full of personality. They only have two boxes of comics, plus some miscellaneous collections, but stock moves fast and I've surprisingly found quite a few there.

The second store is across the street and half a block away, so I usually pop in there if I'm already visiting the first place. They're primarily a record store though, and they have soooo many cool albums I've never even heard of, and always have something good playing. It makes me miss record stores from back in the day. Anyway, they have about 24 short boxes and none of them are sorted. So its kind of a pain unless you really know what youre looking for. It took me about 50 min to go through all of them, which feels like a world record lol.

And the last store. Oh, the last store. I don't go to it often bc as I mentioned, it's kind of expensive. Issues that I know are only worth $3 go for up to $6. But they have THE MOST stock I've ever seen. Like, I am not kidding when I say it's like if you had a dream about looking at comic back issues and it was surreal with boxes stacked everywhere. Also the dude that runs the place is so nice. Oh and they also keep a little shelf of TwoMorrows stuff I particularly appreciate bc 1) they publish the Kirby Collector, and 2) theyre local to the area. But yeah i dont go to this one unless there are issues i have not been able to find elsewhere, since it's highly likely I'll find it there (and for more $). But it's a good place. I still like it a lot. Here are some pics I took inside the place today. The vibe there is really something.

[Images: First is a photo of a comic store interior. Many boxes are stacked in the foreground on both sides, reaching about six to seven feet high. Further into the room is a table are tables that have more boxes of comics which are open and not stacked.

The second photo is of the same room but from a different angle. In the foreground are the open comic boxes. In the background are the many stacked boxes that nearly reach the ceiling. End\]

Anywho, thats it. Thats all. Im just very pleased and i have a lot of love for these local places still keeping it going out there.

#kateliftstheveil #it was honestly SUCH a good day #i get so overly pleased when i have a good day bc it feels like oh i actually can have quality time #and i really really and grateful #now to actually sit down and read everything i bought lol #metron if i fits i sits

[romeoandjulietyouwish]

okay so im thinking about your 🏠 imodna au and i feel like they couldn’t meet ALL the bells hells as roommates at once (because that’d be a lot of roommates to get at once lol) so if you don’t mind here’s some other ways they could meet people i’d love to hear your thoughts on because your writing mind is genius

i feel like chet does actually have to be the roommate (or the first, i do agree they all end up moving in eventually) but like. he sees the ad for another roommate and he answers it. and they end up with this curmudgeonly old guy. and i feel like imogen especially keeps telling laudna she’s gonna kick him out (on days when chet is being especially frustrating) and laudna is just like, darling. first of all no you won’t, but second of all, what if he left and just died of old age? how would you feel then? and so imogen puts up with him (until she finally realizes that ofc she does like him, beneath it all)

imogen and laudna have great minds for design and what they want to do. what they don’t have? strength! so that’s where ashton comes in for sure. he’s not technically a construction worker, sure, but they’ll take any job you offer them and he’s a whole lot cheaper too (and shit they’re good at it? and actually beneath their tough demeanor they’re really cool and nice too)

i feel like FCG always has to come along with ashton so i guess they’re just a friend who maybe just tags along one day? maybe ashton mentions that they think FCG would like their new clients?

imogen is at a flea market one day (with laudna of course, laudna keeps her from getting too anxious in crowds) to get barter for some cheap decor and she sees fearne steal something. she wouldn’t care except she was just about to buy it—she chases fearne down and tries to convince fearne to give it to her or she’ll turn fearne in (once fearne realizes that imogen is not really a do-gooder/snitch type and in fact just really wants whatever she just stole, fearne instantly adores her. she does not give imogen the item, but helps her look around the flea market and get good deals on similar things (and sometimes steals things for imogen although imogen doesn’t encourage this))

maybe when they have a second bedroom open, orym is the next to take it? it’s been very interesting watching cr3 versus the fanon version of him because im so used to fanon that im like “oh yeah he moves into town all sad and lonely because of will’s death (and/or not being with Dorian anymore)” but im behind in cr3 and im at the point where they’re talking about the fact he’s actually the most normal/stable of them all and tbh that’s true (although he obviously is hiding all his shit) but for those reasons idk what fits for a good way to get orym into this au

so yeah some of these ideas make more sense than others in my brain so I’d love to hear your thoughts

I hope it’s okay that I decided to tweak your idea, im just avoiding homework and really love all your aus but am especially excited about this new one so my brain was like “ahh them all becoming roommates at once would be awesome but also a little chaotic, how could they all slowly be incorporated to the au over time?”

It's absolutely okay!

I actually think that Chetney is someone they hire to help them, ya know because he's good at working with wood and there's a shit ton of waterlogged floorboard in the house. And over time, you're so right, the two of them do grow begrudgingly fond of him to the point that when construction is almost over, they offer him the extra attic room.

Oh my god I love the idea of Ashton being a construction worker and FCG being their best friend that just goes everywhere that they do (I love the idea of modern au FCG being in a wheelchair and maybe Ashton learned construction and shit to help build ramps and lifts for them). And the same thing happens, construction is almost done and Imogen offers the two of them a room.

Orym is probably the only one who responds to the roommate ad. He doesn't know much about construction, but he needs a cheap place to live. And he's the connection between the witches and Fearne, when they find out that Orym and Fearne are friends, she moves in too. So everyone but Chetney is doubled up in rooms.

#whitestone house au #bells hells #critical role #lis makes hcs

[somehowmags]

HAHA i guess i haven't seen enough bad takes from the fandom about leona (albeit i definitely have seen some) so i get the impression that vil is mischaracterized more often on average. regardless, ive also seen a lot of fanfic characterizing vil as this emotionally constipated and constantly nagging narcissist who is incapable of showing affection and it makes me [rat clenches fist of rage]. im aware angst often draw out the worst part of a character for the feels, which in this case is vil's strict scrutiny BUT PLELALSLELADE IM SCREAMING MY TEARS ARE ON THE FLOOR.... how are you gonna ignore the scene in chapter 6 where vil literally moves past his stern housewarden persona in order to be vil schoenheit. not the actor, not the model, not the housewarden countless students look towards as a leader-- but vil schoenheit, friend of yours and ally. all to give epel, rook, and yoy; his beloved poison apple, his beloved hunter, and his beloved prefect, a hug and kiss.?? like. kuekd emfusjbfe.??? when he literally squeals for joy after getting his youth back from malleus? when he weeps as an old man? vil schoenheit IS an emotional person! he's an actor with responsibilities on his back, he's not gonna let others see him be anything but strict when the time isn't right! but the point is that he knows when to be soft and loving ESPECIALLY after his overblot!!! 3!&!$!!$!#! he cares so deeply for each and everyone of his pomefiore students and especially those closest to him-- his method of expressing his affection isn't just limited to the occasional praise or hug and kiss, he genuinely wants the best for you when he cares and he'll support you/offer help in achieving your best self! it's not just a byproduct of his need for perfection, but to love is to grow and change and metamorphosize from the flower to the succulent apple and he can see your potential. for the man who knows what it's like to never be enough, he knows you're more than. if only you try. if only you grasped your dreams with your bare hands because god does he dream of it for you. my point is that vil is genuinely one of the most loving characters, even if his ways aren't the most conventional or he may seem harsh. he's not heartless-- though im aware his reaction towards epels moment of emotional vulnerability in the vdc rehearsal gives off said impression, he's grown and changed. i doubt current vil would be so uncaring and stern still if you expressed hurt or discomfort over an austere sentiment he's said or done. if he knows it's what you need, he probably would take a softer and kinder approach. the same water that hardens the egg, softens the potato. he can learn, or perhaps he already understands that some people reach their potential differently-- especially as someone who has lived in the entertainment industry his whole lived, he may be accustomed to the unforgiving nature of its expectations BUT HES NOT ANYMORE!!! and he knows others lead a normal life outside of it, so the same approach taken to him likely wouldn't be suited for them! he won't ever stop trying to suggest betterments for your health, appearance, and outfits but if you express different sentiments he wouldn't take to forcing them onto you!! he just wants you to live your best life, because from what he knows, it brings you gratification and he WANTS you to succeed and be satisfied! im sorry i have a lot to feel about him, i just really despise seeing people overlook the caring trait of his in favor of cheap angst. for someone who has rook as his favorite i really cannot shut my zest fest mouth up about vil <|:-( love his ass

- same anon raving about vil from earlier pt.2 except im more insane

god yeah this is so true....i think about him cheering and crying after malleus restored his youth literally every day of my life he sounds so happy and relieved!!!! had to replay the scene of him kissing rook and epel and yuu like twice to process everything bc i was so !!! at him showing emotion it was so. and like him crying as an old man is mostly played for laughs but it's also so. holy shit. (also the fact that he isn't crying because he's "ugly" but because he wanted more time to play young roles before he started doing older ones.) he's so much more open and emotional in book 6 it's like he's realized he can stop being "the fairest of them all" and just start being vil. like the ice has melted!!! he's so endearing i have gotta hit him with a 2003 toyota corolla

also no this is in character for someone whose fave is rook. this is rook behavior alksjddfhalksjfhlkasdfh he would definitely be on magicam defending vil with his LIFE

#asks #twst #vil schoenheit

[safyresky]

I ENDED UP CALLING MY MOM AND I GOT SOME T E A (a follow up to this post)

Obligatory out of context Jacqueline to preface the vent:

another oldie but goodie, lmao

SO I GAVE INTO THE FEELING IN MY BONES AND CALLED MY MOM

"hey mom, im feelin a lil low bc MIL is mad about the car and is giving Richard crap--"

"oh girl I KNOW I got the lecture too"

I was like UM. HELLO?? GIRL D I S H

so she DISHED and y'all. when my MIL went over last week for a help with technology (bc she is very bad with even the most basic of shit), she APPARENTLY went on the same rant with my MOM, who did NOT appreciate it as my Mom is A) very excited and happy that I got a new car, bc, y'know, now I can go places SAFELY and B) she is of the opinion that it is 100% MY CAR. Which isn't wrong! This was to replace MY car, not Richard's; we just went together and co-signed bc I was more than happy to share it in name (and he was too bc cheaper rates lol). "I didn't want to tell you bc, you know, Richard is ALWAYS with you," says my mom, to which I reply

"JANE it is A-OKAY bc she's giving him SHIT for it too and he's ready to explode about it, they are NOT of the same mind"

It's hard to talk turkey about Richard and his mum with my mom bc back in HS when we met he was v much a Momma's boy, but then, as most people do, he grew up and, as some people do, went away for school and learnt oh god, my mom's kinda toxic??? and emotionally incestuous sometimes??? and does NOT treat me WELL??? and has been working VEYR HARD in the last. 8 or so years. to draw up boundaries with her and such, and this has only increased post-marriage and post me starting therapy a couple of years back as well.

But my Mom does not recognize that, and trying to explain it to her is, frankly, exhausting. So I do what I can to defend his cute lil ass and get on with the point, which is what I did today, but that's not the cruz of the matter here

THE CRUX IS THE TEA!

WHICH IS THAT. MY MIL'S RANT TO MY MOM INCLUDED THE JUICY, JUICY DETAIL OF "you know, why didn't they talk to ME about this decision, I could've helped them get a CHEAP CAR and save MONEY"

Well, Margie. Margie. Sweetie. My darling darling MIL.

1. RICHARD AND I ARE MARRIED IT IS ME AND HIM NOT ME AND HIM AND YOU, AND THIS WAS AN US DECISION, WITH OUR FINANCES, AND OUR TRAVEL/WORK-LIFE BALANCE/MENTAL HEALTH/SAFETY ISSUE.

2. IT ORIGINATED OUT OF ME REPLACING MY CAR; NOT RICHARD REPLACING HIS. AND THAT IS WHY. YOU WERE NOT CONSULTED, BC THE PEOPLE WHO NEEDED TO BE CONSULTED--ME AND RICHARD AND MY DAD (whomst is Fitzy's proper owner) WERE CONSULTED! AND WE TOOK CARE OF IT OURSELVES!

3. WHY WOULD I CONSULT YOU ABOUT A DECISION THAT DOESN'T INVOLVE YOU? AH!

So, there was some interesting stuff I immediately told Richard who replied to my four option plan with a "Well I tried B, and we seem to be going back to C, so I am now going to focus on D" and like, GOOD! YOU DON'T NEED HER OPINION!

ALSO

MY GOD! I DO NOT WANT A CHEAPER CAR. I WANT A GOOD CAR THAT IS RELIABLE AND ISN'T GOING TO BREAK IN ~5 YEARS! AND IF IT DOES, GUESS WHAT? BC IT'S NEWER AND ACQUIRED THROUGH A DEALER, IT'LL BE UNDER A WARRANTY! I DON'T WANT TO GET A LESS SHITTY CAR TO REPLACE MY SHITTY CAR, I WOULD RATHER GET A NEWER ONE THAT I KNOW IS GOING TO LAST A HOT MINUTE! THE LAST 2 HONDAS MY FAM HAS HAD HAVE LASTED 16 YEARS! 16 YEARS! WITH CANADIAN WINTERS! MY GOD! THAT'S IMPRESSIVE AS FUCK AND I LOVE THAT RELIABILITY! AHHHH

So YEAH it's been a DAY and like, I was under the impression that it was ME and RICHARD who were married, not me and him AND MIL! AHHHHH

anyway, I felt better after chatting with my mom, even if she didn't really get it, bc A) TEA and B) she's up at the Falls with my aunts rn and at one point on the phone this happened:

My aunt in the background: JANE. JANE. GIVE ME THE PHONE GIVE ME THE. DANIELLA. DANIELLA CAN YOU HEAR ME

Me: yeah

Aunt: LISTEN, I DON'T KNOW WHY YOUR MIL IS MAD AT YOU, AND IT'S CERTAINLY NONE OF MY BUSINESS, BUT I AM GOING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING THAT I TRULY BELIEVE GRANDPA WOULD'VE TOLD YOU. FOR HOW TO DEAL WITH THIS SITUATION. WHAT TO SAY TO HER

Me: okay...

Aunt: HE HAD A SPECIAL PHRASE, ALRIGHT? NOW, DON'T GET ME WRONG. HE LOVED HIS MOTHER IN LAW. BUT WHEN SHE GOT TO BE TOO MUCH, HE'D TURN TO HER AND SAY, "comes merda"

Me, RECOGNIZING the Portuguese immediately and having to recalculate: DO YOU MEAN TO TELL ME MY GRANDFATHER WOULD WANT ME TO TELL MY MIL TO EAT SHIT

My Aunt, without missing a beat: YES

My Mom was laughing soo hard in the background my aunt had to hold the phone for a hot minute lmao.

#dani speaks #dani vents #dani vents 2: electric bugaloo #i do love my mil. she has her moments. HOWEVER #IT SEEMS HER BAD MOMENTS OUTWEIGH HER GOOD ONES #MAINLY BC OF HOW THEY EFFECT MY BIG OL MANS!! #I WILL KILL FOR THIS MAN Y'ALL DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!! I LOVE HIM VERY MUCH!!! I WILL BE VERY WINTER ON MAIN #AND STAB A BITCH THE MOMENT THEY ARE RUDE TO HIM #GOD i'm not about to SIT HERE and CONSULT HER for EVERY DECISION RICHARD AND I MAKE #ESPESH WHEN IT DOESN'T INVOLVE HER AND IT'S MROE A ME THING THAN A HIM THING #My mom was so funny on the phone lmao. she was ready to go OFF #she was like 'and she's sitting here bashing this decision YOU made for YOUR car and im like uh. hello???? that's my DAUGHTER ur talkin bou #sometimes my mom DELIGHTS me #and my aunts have their moments too! #but my GOD has this been EXHAUSTING #anyway. it is now evening time and im sure richard will check in once mil is in bed bc my GOD #POOR MANS IS HAVING A TIME #dani doodles #out of context jacquelines

[honestandveiled]

Part I - Spinach Lasagne

The first thing I noticed about him was the tattoos on his fingers when he served me my spinach lasagne. Yum, I thought to myself referring to the fingers. I live right across the restaurant and I come here every evening and order the same thing but those fingers are new. I usually bring my papers in a binder to read while I eat and stay a little longer and watch people. I look up to see the fingers' owner, new guy. He's got these chiseled arms, dishelved curls and sheen of hardwork on his face. He looked distracted. I smile at him and thank him, trying to hide my perving. Oh God, its been so long since I've gotten laid. Im perving on random guys who are serving me food. Ever since I started my PhD program, I barely had time for anything else - which is also why I get my dinner at this place everyday - its cheap and delicious and I'm too busy to cook. 

He nods in acknowledgment with a slight smile. Bon appetit he says and leaves. Usually I never stay until the place closes because id like to give the staff their space while closing it up, today however, I wanna see him again, even if it's just briefly. I had my papers to keep me company. Unconsciously curling my hair with my fingers with one hand and using the other to fidget with my pen, I was deeply engrossed in my papers. I only looked up because I noticed a sound at the counter - there he was. There's nobody else around. It was closing time. I lost track of time, I apologize and try to organize my mess of papers and ready to get up. 

"Um-uh you can actually stay longer if you'd like? I mean-n, we are closed but ill be around to finish up some cleaning and stuff. you're welcome to stay."

"You sure?

"Yeah, you look like you're in the zone with your work and I won't be done for another 45 mins so you're fine until then."

 "Thank you, that's so considerate! But that's okay ill head home - I need some coffee anyway." I know they don't sell coffee and I feel bad for imposing without buying anything extra.

"I can make you some coffee. God knows I could use a coffee and cigarette before my cleaning" 

"Huh. I didnt realize you folks sold coffee"

"Oh we dont. But I can make you one"

"Aw, thanks! Can you let me pay for it at least?"

"Do you smoke?"

"Mhm" I nod, embarrassed of my infinite attempts at quitting. In fact I successfully quit before I started my phd only to pick it back up. 

"You can pay me in company when I'm done making the coffee" 

--- 

We are standing at the back of the building in the biting cold, with the coffee warming our fingers and cigarette smoke our faces. 

"I'm y/n btw."  I extend my hand.

"Carmy". He closes in. Those fingers again. 

"Im actually a regular" 

"Oh I know. Spinach lasagne. You know I have like 8 other things on the menu right?" 

"Haha what can I say? The chef in there knows what theyre doing.  Id marry them for the lasagne" 

He laughed. "No, im serious. This is most pleasure I've experienced carnally in literally 10 months. Thank your chef for me - the lasagne has been a sex replacement for a poor ol phd student." Ugh I'm so horny its showing. I should probably shut up.

He blushed, blowing smoke from his mouth. "The chef's probably super deprived himself and uses food as a replacement too"

"What if the chef is deriving his talent from deprivation". We are talking about sex (or the lack thereof) very nonchalantly and I need to get used to it but my vagina is screaming. 

"Or- or - or hear me out. What if he actually gets a real good fucking and and - " he pauses and laughs "actually i have nothing to add. I think he needs some fucking"

"Id fuck him" i say without thinking. Clearly we are not talking about the chef anymore

"Right now?" He asks coming tad bit closer. 

"Right now." 

He comes closer, kissing me desparetely, lifting my thigh to wrap it around him. I can feel him grow against me while he's thrusting into me. I pull his curls closer and moan. 

"Inside. Now"

We sloppily move through the kitchen dropping our clothes as we head to an office thats dimly lit and scattered with papers. He pushes some papers to clear some space and puts me on the desk. He tries to go down on me. I pull him by his curls stopping him.

"Um-uh im very hairy down there. Havent exactly planned for this"

"Even better" he replies and goes to town. I bite my lip, conscious of my moaning sounds

"I like it when you're loud. Tell me how much you want this"

"Oh please keep going, i want you so bad."

He's moaning while he's eating me. "That feels so good. Please keep going", I mumble between my moans. He is flicking his tongue on my clit so firm and hard that it almost kills me, then he digs his finger into me while sucking on my clit. 

"Tell me what you want" he demands.

"This is so good. Keep going". Im going feral!

"Tell me or ill stop" he says almost pulling out his finger".

I let out a small cry. "Fuck me with more fingers!"

"Tell me how"

"Harder!"

He adds one more finger and fucks me really hard and fast with them. 

"More?" He asks and before I could say anything, "of course you'd want more, don't you my poor ol desperate student?" He mocks.

"Tell me exactly how many" he asks using the same demanding voice

"All your fingers. Please"

"I knew it" he quickly changes his stance to fist me hard and lifts his head up close and sucks on tongue and biting my lip lightly. I hold him tightly by his hair while he's fisting the daylights out of me. "You're driving me crazy" I breathe into his mouth. He kisses harder

"Ready to be fucked?" He asks almost earnestly

"Not yet. My turn" I try to grab his cock

"We are fucking. Im going to go inside you and thats the way this works"

"Nope. You don't make all the rules here.'  I look at him sternly while I hold his cock tightly in my hand pulling him towards me. Touching his balls lightly while I hold his length hard. He holds my jaw tightly "You wanna play hard? I could do hard" he says and before he could do anything I push him back to the wall, get on my knees and put him in my mouth. 

He moans as I suck on his tip and squeeze his ass towards me, lightly touching between his cheeks. He stands there accepting temporary defeat. I look him in the eye and say. "Grab my hair and make me go at the speed you'd like"

He uses my mouth to fuck hard and fast as I make glucking noies. "Fuck. You're so hot." 

He pulls my head away from his and brings me to his lips. "I need to be inside you." He pauses before he says "please" 

I kiss him back while he puts me back on the counter. I put my legs over his shoulders but he holds them by the ankles and moves them above my head and fucks me like its his last. When he finally comes he lets out one last groan and drops his head into my chest and gives small kisses. I kiss him on his face, my legs shaking visibly. He laughs and rubs my thighs along the sides and kisses them  "sh sh calm down. You did so good" I laugh a little embarrassed by my legs. 

"Water?"

"Water." I reply 

"I'll be back" he comes back with a glass of water for both of us. He kisses me with his water filled mouth. Spitting into mine and slowly moves away while I quench my thirst.

He drops a mattress on the floor 

"You had a mattress all along?"

"Sorry yeah." He runs his fingers through the back of his head sheepishly. "Got carried away. Come lie beside me"

Our naked backs to the floor we look up while he plays with my long curly hair while I his tattooed fingers. 

"Whats your phd in?" He asks 

"Computer science. Specifically machine learning. Statistical modelling that kind of thing"

"Tell me more"

"Some other night. Tell me about your finger tattoos"

"I got them when i was in juvie. Don't mean much now. Some other night"

We lie in silence and slowly drift away to sleep.

 -- 

An alarm goes off around 4.30 am. 

"Fuck!shit! Im sorry arrghh" he curses while trying to shut it down. I make sleepy noises and see his face looking at me.

"Darling. Hey- hey mwah, darling. I've got to leave now. Okay? Got some errands to run". I nod trying to make sense of my surroundings. 

"Im really sorry but you probably should too. My crew is gonna come in a couple of hours." I stretch my body while he runs his fingers against me and kisses my stomach. 

"What errands at..."I look at the watch "..4.30 in the morning?"

"Gotta pick up produce for today. Need spinach for your lasagna" he smiles 

"What kind of chef makes his waiter get produce at 4 in the morning and clean up at the end of the day?" I ask while we are putting on clothes. I steal a last kiss on his bare back before he puts his shirt on. 

"The chef who is deprived, remember? Actually not anymore apparently"

"You're the chef?" I laugh thinking we are still joking "why were you waiting tables?" 

"Short staffed yesterday"

"You're being serious? Omg. I said stupid things about the chef, sorry"

"I did too. Don't be sorry. It's all true. Ill walk you home?"

"Yes please". 

#carmy smut #carmen berzatto #carmen berzatto x you