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#yeah; I really didn't have time to write a detailed description
star-sim · 2 months
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hello kitty meets batman (real not clickbait!) ☆ jake sim
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☆ youtuber! super down bad! bf! jake x youtuber! fem! reader ☆summary: jake sim was youtube's cut-throat, horror creator, known for his dark video style. meanwhile, you were the cutesy beauty vlogger, lighting up every algorithmically generated home page you touched. no one would have expected you two vastly different people to know each other, let alone be in a long-term relationship. ☆ genre: fluff, youtuber! au, secret dating! au, established relationship, suggestive, im sorry im never letting the ytber au go, cutesy!reader, jake is SO down bad its kinda painful #patheticmen ☆warning(s): no, just fluffy, also reader is really feminine and girly in this ☆ word count: 13.4k words ☆ wrote half of this in spanish class so im sorry if there are mistakes, first time writing established relationship in full, kinda nervy
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Jake Sim was many things.
One of the most popular and well-respected content creators on Youtube was one of them.
As Jake's nimble fingers darted across his keyboard, his other hand rested firmly on his mouth, he thought that the blue light emitting from his computer screen should burn his eyes. Except, it didn't. Despite what most people thought, 90% of being Youtuber was just simply staring at a computer screen, rather than being in front of a camera lens. The man felt his nose prickle before he let out a soundless, but satisfying, yawn. He leaned back against his office chair, stretching his neck and arms before he rubbed his eyes.
There was a reason that he was an extremely respected creator on Youtube.
For one, the production quality of his videos were high. Down to the Closed Captions or his camera's grain, Jake's attention to detail was immaculate. Not to mention, the content itself was magnificent. 
Whenever people asked Jake what he did for work, it was hard for him to answer.
He'd said that he made horror content, but he'd only earned incredulous looks, like he was a madman. Even then, "horror" content wasn't the correct description.
In short, Jake liked to make videos about obscure things. Which just so happened to be a little spooky. Sketchy true crime cases, searches for lost media, strange Internet phenomena, government cover-ups— Name anything a little bit eerie and Jake probably already covered something of that sort on his channel. Given the nature of his content, Jake almost always maintained a serious tone, but when the opportunity came to offer his opinion, he liked to relay it in a straightforward way. 
Another reason why he was so regarded was because of his content style. He preferred using darker colors, having a crisp microphone that picked up every rasp of his deeper voice. When he had camera shots, Jake liked to be in a dimly lit room. Unfortunately, his room was dark, too. 
This all combined together to create a singular image for Jake: the cool, high-quality, but a little bit scary, guy that likes to make videos about scary topics.
Now cracking his knuckles, Jake sucked in a sharp breath. Although he could easily export his upcoming video now and upload it, garnering millions of views, he refused to. There was something missing from it; it needed a little umph, a little embellishment to really pull things together. If there was one thing about Jake, it was that he'd put quality over quantity any day.
Jake is torn out of his thoughts when his phone, long forgotten next to his mouse, lit up. Usually, when he worked long afternoons like this, he silenced his phones in order to maintain focus.
However, there was always one exception.
You.
pretty girl: hi babe, do you think you can help me take promo pictures later?
The moment that Jake saw your contact show up, he picked up his phone immediately. His fingers tapped his screen, quickly responding to you.
me: yeah i can do it rn if you want
pretty girl: if youre busy, it doesn't need to be today, it can be tomorrow or something
pretty girl: oh
pretty girl: are you sure?
Of course he was.
Jake was already shutting off his monitor, grabbing his keys and shoving his feet into his shoes at your first message.
me: yeah i'll come over right now
You were Jake Sim's girlfriend. But other than the people in your personal life, no one else knew that.
Not that either of you minded.
Like Jake, you were a Youtuber. Except, your community was the complete opposite from his.
Your niche was cute makeup and lifestyle. Your videos had cute, blushy sets, characterized by cute plushies in the background and pretty, pink decorations. When you weren't making makeup tutorials or "get ready with me's," you were giving your viewers small sneak-peeks into your life. Whether it be your rosy morning skincare, or your sunny afternoon cooking attempts, or your illuminated late night thoughts, your content was light-hearted, soft, and personable. 
And if you weren't doing any of those things, you were modeling.
You were a beauty influencer, so you had sponsors from different makeup companies and such. What was most distinguishable from your personal brand was that you were one of Sanrio's biggest ambassadors. If there was someone that was the living embodiment of Hello Kitty, it was you.
Your personability, and your ability to feel authentic to your viewers, was a key factor in your large viewerbase. And what contributed to that the most was the fact that you had no idea how to use a camera. One would think that a content creator would know how to use a camera, but you were somehow the exception.
Not a problem!
Because you had your boyfriend, Jake!
Who was basically the master of content creation and film, in your opinion.
"Jakey!" you pounced on your boyfriend the moment he appeared at your apartment doorway. You threw your arms around his neck, immediately peppering his neck and cheeks with kisses. You heard him let out a few chuckles, feeling the rumble of his strong chest as he did. 
"Geez, babe, let me take my shoes off first," Jake teased you, taking in your sweet strawberry perfume. You immediately peeled yourself off of him, your lips forming a cute frown. 
"Shut up," you murmured, punching him on the arm while you jutted your bottom lip out. The lip tint and gloss on them shined, which made Jake grin. And when you noticed that he was staring at your lips, you gave him a gentle shove before saying again, “Shut up, Jakey.”
There it was, his favorite thing about you.
You were so, very, really, undeniably, mean to him.
Okay, that sounded weird.
But it was the truth.
Your relationship could be summed up in a few words—
You were just the cutest, and could barely contain your feelings for Jake, so you'd get all cuddly and affectionate with him. He'd tease you about it, so you'd get all shy and flustered, and you would begin to be mean to him. You'd call him stupid or annoying, and you'd tell him to go away but make no effort to resist his arms wrapping around your waist, pulling you against his chest. And then he would get to tease you more, until you were so embarrassed that you relented and let him kiss you.
How could he not resist teasing you?
You were always so pretty, with makeup or not, and it was easy to tease you since you got embarrassed so easily.
Even if he was holding his most expensive camera in his hands, he'd still let you pounce on him, if it meant that he got one extra kiss from you.
You led him to your bedroom. It had the same sweet, strawberry scent as you. Your room was pink, and along the walls were shelves, all filled with the many, many plushies that Jake bought you. Plopping onto your bed, Jake watched as you dug around your filming desk.
"Sooo," he started, "You're gonna do a promotional post on Instagram?"
You hummed. Sanrio recently launched a new line of lip tints, and they sent you their newest ones to review and promote. 
"I already made a review, and it's going to go up later," you said, digging through your drawers. "I want to make a promo post, too, y'know?"
You let out an 'a-ha!' as you found what you were looking for. It was a tube of lip-tint, the newest one from the collection. You then touched up your makeup a little more. 
Jake watched you in awe. The way you applied lip gloss and brushed setting powder (or was it blush? he didn't know anything about makeup) onto your cheeks was so mesmerizing, as you weren't already so captivating to him.
Finally, you stood up, straightening out your outfit. You puckered your lips, and when you noticed Jake staring at you, you gave him a little twirl.
"How do I look?" you asked. 
Jake, with his camera in hand, pointed the lens at you. He looked through the viewfinder.
"Beautiful." 
As always.
The shoot went smoothly. As you always did when Jake was your photographer, the two of you drove to the film studio, renting out a room for a good hour. Jake was a pro with the camera and you were an even bigger pro at modeling. Other than a few compositional edits or changes in exposure, you and Jake were done as soon as you started. The two of you decided that you’d go back to your place, cook dinner together, and maybe watch a movie.
Except that got delayed.
“Y-You’re so annoying, Jake,” you struggled out. You were in the back seat of your car, legs thrown over your boyfriend’s hips, his soft lips connected to your neck. Your fingers gently tugged on his hair, you yourself pressing soft pecks against his forehead and temples. It started because you gave Jake a kiss on the cheek as a ‘thank you,’ which spiraled into a makeout session in your car.
“What,” he breathed against your skin, dark eyes flickering up to yours. “You said you’d do anything to express your thanks for me.”
Jake kissed your neck again, before trailing up your throat to your jaw. Your fingers raked through his soft hair, pushing his dark locks out of his face so that you could see his face clearly. Jake reached up, took your hand out of his hair, and instead held your palm against his cheek, nuzzling into your warm hand. The way your eyes widened into saucers, lips parting, in response made the man’s lips curve upward.
“W-Well I thought you’d ask me to hug you… or something,” you said sheepishly, your voice soft as your boyfriend’s actions flustered you.
Jake grinned to himself internally before pulling away from you altogether. 
“Then do you want to stop?” Your eyes widened a fraction. “Then, let’s go hom—“
“No!” you cut him off, your hands squeezing his shoulders. “Let’s not!”
You stared at him, brows furrowed, for a few moments, before you noticed the growing grin on your boyfriend’s face. That look you knew too well, the one that said that he was going to tease the everlasting fuck out of you.
Jake pulled you in by the waist, close enough so that your chests touched, noses almost brushing against each other. He could feel the heat radiating off your face, and you could hear the smile in his voice.
“You sure you don’t wanna stop?” His voice was teasing, but you knew better. The earnest look in his eyes, you stared into yours, was filled with sincerity. He gave your waist a squeeze, almost as if to ask, “Do you actually want this?”
“Yes, Jakey,” you breathed against his lips, matter-of-factly. “I don’t wanna stop.”
The corner of his lips begin to lift.
“So you better kiss me,” you quipped, gripping his shoulders.
“Thought you’d never ask,” he rasped back, before attacking your lips.
(Later, when you were done, you two went home and went about your plan for the night. Except, you had to yell at Jake to go wash his face, because the sight of your lipstick at the corner of his lips was too much for you to take.)
"Hi, everyone!" you greeted the camera, folding your hands in your lap. With your thick, pink, knit sweater's sleeves falling over your wrists, you shot the lens a pretty smile. It was another normal day on the job of making content.
"As you guys know, VidCon is coming up soon." You pulled your makeup pouch toward your chest, leaning against the edge of your filming desk. "So, let's pack with me!"
Vidcon was an event for people to meet all of their favorite Youtubers. This year, you were invited to be one of the featured creators, given your popularity. As you filmed your "Pack with Me!" vlog, surrounded by ring lights aided by your windows cracked open, you recalled the email you had sent earlier, squeezing your eyes shut.
You see, Jake and you were both invited to VidCon. Since no one else, not even Youtube the corporation or your fellow Youtubers, knew that you guys were dating, Jake and you were given vastly different things. Youtube booked an entire hotel complex for all of its creators, and unfortunately, your room was located 10 floors below Jake's room. And worse, your booths and events were so far apart from each other that you probably wouldn't even see your boyfriend even if he decided to traverse the Convention. 
That's what you got for being vastly different content creators.
This year would be the first year that you and Jake got invited to VidCon, and you two wanted to share this experience with each other as much as possible.
Which is why you just shot Youtube one of the most embarrassing emails of your life.
"Hi, Youtube. The hotel complex you booked has a bar, and it is much closer to the top than the bottom. I really want to visit that bar. Can I request a room change so that my room is maybe on the 15th or 16th floors?" except add more formalities and much more discreet language, and that was the email you sent to your employers. You knew that it wouldn't be hard, and that the Youtube PR manager wouldn't reject your request. After all, you were the Sanrio beauty girl. Regardless, you'd gotten a response about an hour ago, and your request was approved, luckily. 
As you continued talking to your camera, folding your clothes neatly while chatting to your viewers about updates in your life, you thought about what you and Jake should do at VidCon. It was in the LA area, but you definitely wanted to visit other places in Southern California. 
It was no surprise that you and Jake had been more than touchy and close to each other. You were dating. Still, butterflies formed in your stomach as you thought about what you would do with him. Your face heated up at the thought of you and him spending time together in the hotel's rooftop hot-tub. The idea of him sneaking in your room at night, warming you up and pepperinging your cheeks with kisses, made your heart rate speed up, and you could only relish in the thought of exploring LA, Irvine, or wherever Jake wanted to take you with him.
You were a grown woman with a job and responsibilities, but the mere thought of your boyfriend being within the same vicinity as you made you nervous.
Just as you finished folding your clothes, you heard your front door crack open.
"Babe?" you hear Jake's voice call out your name. You turn off your camera to greet him, swearing to forget all of the thoughts you just had. Except, the moment that you locked eyes with him, all determination to not be teased left your body. Your lips wobbled, trying to bite back that stupid, bashful, and lovesick smile that made its way onto your face when you thought about Jake, but your eyes gave it all away. Instead of throwing yourself at him like you usually did, you only reached for the hem of his black T-shirt, playing with it sheepishly. 
You mumbled a small, "Hi."
You could feel Jake staring at you, and you could hear the way his lips curve into a smug, shit-eating grin.
"Shut up," you told him, your eyebrows crashing together.
"Baby, I didn't even say anything," Jake said, his hands finding their place on your lower back.
You felt shy and exposed before him. "Well, I know you're going to say something."
Jake grasped your chin, gently making you look at him. You tried to avoid his eyes, but it was impossible to avoid those dreamy, caramel eyes. Then, he took your face with both his hands, leaning in.
Was he going to kiss you? Oh my god, he was! Quick! What do you do? You felt like you were going to melt.
Instinctively, your hands tightened on the hem of his shirt, the black fabric scrunching in your fists. You closed your eyes, your lips softly puckering. You could feel him coming closer and closer, until his breath fanned your cheek.
As if he hadn't kissed you a million times before, your heart felt like it was going to fall out of your chest. 
Jake ghosted his lips over yours, inching just close enough that he could brush his lip against yours. 
And then, he pulled away from you. He took off his shoes, placed down his keys, and made his way into your bedroom, leaving you there standing alone.
Heat spread across your face and neck and ears as you realized your boyfriend had just teased you once again. You hid your face in your palms, letting out a small whine of embarrassment, before recollecting yourself and joining your boyfriend.
"Woah, what's going on here, babe?" Jake asked, standing at your bedroom doorway. 
"Oh." There was clothes and film equipment sprawled across your floor and bed. "I was filming a video."
You saw Jake's expression twitch, before he took your hands in his.
"My bad, was I interrupting something?" He was sincere in how his face showed a small drop of guilt for disrupting your filming. How could someone be such a tease one moment yet be so genuine the next?
"No, it's okay, Jakey," you said. "I mean, I need to finish my video, but I don't mind if you're around."
And that's how you found yourself trying not to burst out laughing as you filmed your video. Jake kept making funny faces at you, that goofy grin growing on his face as he wiggled his eyebrows at you.
"Jake, stop making faces!" you laughed, throwing a shirt at him.
He dodged it, throwing his head back into one of the plushies that he bought you. "I'm not doing anything!"
You threw another shirt at him, this time hitting him square in the face. Instead of admitting defeat, Jake only grabbed your shirt, pulling the fabric to his nose and taking a long, dramatic, sniff. 
"You smell sooooo good, babe," he said, ignoring your contorted expression, "I think I'm gonna keep this. You won't mind, right?"
"Ugh, Jaaaaakee!"
You plopped on top of him in bed. You felt his chest rumble as chuckles left his lips, rolling your eyes at him. You gave his chest a smack, a pout forming on your lips.
"You're so annoying," you mumbled as his hands slithered up to your hips. He gave your ass a pat, gesturing you to adjust your position. You did, sitting up so that you straddled your boyfriend's hips.
"And you're so pretty," he said, squeezing your hipbone.
"Let go of me," you poked him in the chest, but made no attempt to get off of him. 
"No."
"I need to finish my video," you pouted, still not moving to get off of him. 
"I don't care." Jake instead sat up on his elbows, his hands sliding down to your lower back, his face getting suspiciously close to your boobs. "Just lay with me."
Your fingers ran through his dark locks, before giving them a tug towards your chest. Jake laid his cheek against your boobs like they were pillows, arms wrapped around your waist. You could feel his hot breath against your skin and neck. The next thing you knew, he was pressing sticky kisses against your chest and neck, soft gasps escaping your lips.
"Sorry, babe," he muttered against the shell of your ear, "I just can't resist you."
You let out a soft "ahhh!" when he bit down on your skin, his teeth brushing against the nape of your neck. Jake briefly pulled away, a smirk making its way onto his face as he admired the red-purple mark on your neck. 
"You're just too addicting."
Long story short, your video was still finished and uploaded. As Jake edited his video, he let yours play in the background, your bright voice illuminating his dark room. Somehow, your voice was the only thing that made him focus. 
However, when he heard a familiar laugh— his laugh— in your video, Jake stopped in his tracks.
His mind flashed back to what happened the other day in your apartment, when he interrupted you during your filming.
"I don't know if I turned off my camera, Jake," you had purred as Jake's tongue dipped into your collarbone. At that point, both you and him were shirtless, hair disheveled and pupils blown out with desire. Jake remembered the electricity that ran through him as those words left your lips.
"Am I supposed to care?" he had muttered, trailing kisses down your chest. "If they hear us, that's not my problem."
It was almost like you, who edited your video, added that clip to tease him. 
Immediately, his cheeks began turning the brightest shade of red possible. If you were here, he would have only coughed and looked away shyly, but since he was alone, his embarrassment spread across his face like a wildfire. Jake almost never showed it when he was flustered, at least when he was around you. 
He hid his face in his palms, sucking in a sharp breath. He squeezed his eyes shut, warmth prickling his skin. You were going to be the death of him. He let out a small, lovesick giggle, one that his friends would flame him for. He couldn't help it, not if it was you. 
When he read the comments, still flustered out of his mind, he felt a twinge of disappointment when no one seemed to notice him. 
For some reason, Jake couldn’t help but want people to know that you were his. He knew that you and him kept your relationship private to preserve it, but he still wanted to show you off.
Except, one comment caught his eye.
“Wait, does [Name] have a boyfriend? Who laughed at 6:34?” it read. Jake’s heart skipped a beat in his chest. The warmth that spread across his chest as his lips pulled upwards. He almost wanted to jump on his bed and roll around while giggling like a schoolgirl, but he contained himself.
At the corner of his eye, Jake spotted a certain plushie. 
As you were a partner of Sanrio, for a time there was a Limited Edition [Name] plushie, clad in pink with a cute, ruffle-lace bow to top it all off. Of course he bought one the moment it launched. Jake preferred his room to be completely dark and black, but he liked to keep that plushie on his bed, and although he’d never admit it, he hugged it when he slept if you weren’t with him.
Would it be wrong of him to tease you back? After all, Jake still had to film the brand deal for his new video. 
Would it hurt to position the plushie just enough so that it was in frame? 
So that maybe someone would see it.
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Vidcon came crashing on you and Jake like a meteor, and before the two of you knew it, you were in the venue, wringing your fingers as the event commenced.
Sometimes, it was difficult for you to comprehend the level of your popularity. Sure, the numbers that Youtube loved to display for you told you that you had millions watching you, but mere numerical figures were simply not enough for you to wrap your mind around.
Your schedule that day was simple: you were going to have a booth that you'd tend to for an hour or two, where your fans could take pictures with you and take a few freebies with them. Then, you'd go to your main event, which was in a smaller venue.
At your booth, where you sat currently, your personal table was set up in a very special way: your table was pink, and covered in a lacy, white tablecloth. Even the wall behind you was specifically painted pink and decorated with various Sanrio-esque decorations. You had stickers that you'd give out, as well as a Limited Edition Vidcon Sanrio plushie of you that people could buy. The pink polaroid decorated with Hello Kitty stickers hung around your neck with a pink lanyard. You genuinely looked like Sanrio and Hello Kitty vomited all over you, but you didn't mind. And plus, that didn't matter, because you were cute either way.
You were hit with pure surprise as multiple groups of fans came your way. The amount of people that came to you, rambling nervously about how much they loved you, how much they looked up to you, how much you inspired them and made their days better, made you feel light-headed. And very warm inside.
Jake was the one that did the talking for you (thank goodness!), but for some reason, you pushed through your usual shyness, instead wanting for people to come up to you and talk.
Your face lit up as one of your fans, a girl that looked around your age, maybe only a few years younger than you, approached you. You could tell by the Sanrio sticker of you on her phone case that she was most definitely here for you.
"Oh my gosh, hi [Name]!" She gazed at you with wide, glimmering eyes. 
Your initial reaction was surprise, but then you broke out into a smile. You cocked your head, fingers gripping the hem of your dress, both nervous and excited. "Hi, there."
You fan took one look at your face, and squealed. The way that she giggled, bouncing on her feet as she fangirled over you made warmth spread across your cheeks, getting shy and looking down briefly.
"I'm sorry, [Name]!" Your fan couldn't stop giggling, which you thought was very cute. It was now that you noticed the camera in your hand. "I just really love your content, and I'm just so excited to meet you in real life!"
You blinked at her a few times, before you smile only widened. 
"Don't worry about it!" you said, taking her free hand in yours. Your shyness melted away as your fan squealed again. "It really means a lot to me that you came out here to personally see me."
Your eyes flickered over to her camera, squeezing her hand and motioning to it with your other. "Can I...?"
She nodded enthusiastically, so you took her camera. Turn on the 'photo' setting, you posed for the camera, taking multiple pictures of yourself for her. You hoped that that would make up for your shyness. The two of you hugged, and you took many polaroids for her.
Almost immediately, after she left, you were tagged in a Twitter thread. It was that fan, reporting her experience with you.
"She was so much prettier in real life, I thought I was in heaven," her tweets detailed, "And [Name] was so sweet! It felt like I was meeting the real life Hello Kitty."
She posted the pictures you took on her camera, and then the videos. You couldn't help but grin like an idiot, especially at the comments (and the rapidly-accumulating likes and retweets).
"The way [Name] gets so shy is so cute!"
"I don't really watch beauty content but I love [Name] so much."
"She's like an actual Disney Princess."
You loved your fans, you really did. You were grateful for them, and you thought they were very cute. 
You were excited to see how Vidcon would treat you.
Jake was fighting.
He was fighting demons, wars, the little voices in his head.
Did you have to look so pretty today?
Jake's own event was an entire venue away from yours. He had a few events, so after his first one, he took a small break, where he looked through his notifications. 
Of course, the first thing he looked at was your texts. They were from a while ago, during his show when he didn't have his phone on him, so he responded to them now. He smiled at your cute texts, expressing how excited and happy you were. His heart jumped out of his chest when he saw the selfie you sent him: there you were, in all your cutesy Sanrio glory, smiling so prettily for him. Jake had to clasp his face to hide the stupid, love-struck grin that bled onto his face. 
"Oi, what're you giggling about?" Jake was interrupted by Jay, another one of his fellow horror Youtubers.
Jake immediately wiped his expression clean. "Nothing."
When he glanced back at his phone, that dumb grin began to form again.
Jay groaned. "This is so weird. It's like watching Batman smile."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Jake scoffed.
"I'm sayin' that you're basically Youtube's Batman," Jay scrunched his nose, "And it's weird seein' you all... smiley and stuff."
"I literally smiled earlier!"
"Not in the way that you did just now. I have a bad feeling about it."
"Shut up!"
Jake really tried his best to swallow back his pure admiration for you as he opened his phone screen again, but he failed miserably.
He wished he could see you right now. He loved to see his fans, he loved to talk to them about their shared interest: all things horror and obscure.
But Jake missed you right now.
His heart plummeted to his stomach, however, when he logged onto Twitter, and saw the worst hashtag he could ever think of: #[Name]isSoCute.
He agreed with it. No, he embraced that sentiment with every molecule in his being.
Just... he wished that he could see you right now. When he checked the tag and saw all the cute pictures that people took of you and the sweet experiences they had with you, he frowned— That should be him!
However, Jake actually saw the worst thing to ever materialize when he saw the top video under the tag.
It was a shaky video, starting off with a teenage boy walking up to you. In the background, he could hear your pretty voice in the background, exchanging small greetings and words with the poster. Jake was almost lost in his sheer love for you when his eyes narrowed. The boy in the video let out a little chuckle, before dropping a cheesy pick-up line on you.
"[Name], if you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber." What made it worse was that you only giggled, leading the boy to drop a few other dumb pick-up lines. The camera panned up to you, showing you all smiley and bashful. Then, you and the boy hugged, before taking a few polaroids together.
Jake almost snapped his phone in half.
He understood better than anyone that you were a content creator just like him. It was part of the job to interact with fans, and given your character, of course you were sweet to them. He could tell that you were perfectly comfortable in the video, and that the kid probably was just joking around with his favorite Youtuber.
But did that stop Jake from mentally lambasting every single aspect of the video? Absolutely not.
Shaky camera, probably filmed on a phone, Jake's hands balled into fists, Fucked up aperture, exposure to low, bad mic.
Was he being a little immature? Yes, and Jake knew that. 
Though, Jake would admit that he agreed with a lot of comments and retweets under that post, hearting many of them in agreement.
"[Name] is such a cutie!" one read.
Absolutely.
"I love her so much," another read.
Me too, Jake thought.
"I want her so bad."
Just as Jake's finger hovered over the 'heart' button, he let out a small hmph. Did it annoy him that other people wanted you? Yes. But did he disagree with the comment? Nope. He pressed the "like" button.
He wanted to see you so bad. As Jake was queued up on stage, ready for his second event, he hoped that he could see you soon.
And his wish came true a few hours later.
It was now past noon, and Vidcon was in its (unofficial) intermission period, where a lot of the creators were now taking breaks. As Jake traversed the convention, he texted you trying to find a spot where the two of you could meet.
He passed the many booths and venues of his fellow Youtubers. The layout was unique in the way that Youtubers of similar genres were placed in similar areas. So when he started seeing Youtubers with bright makeup and problematic pasts, Jake knew that he was near you.
And lo and behold, soon he found you. Under the fluorescent light, you still glowed. There was some kind of halo around you as you turned over your shoulder, your face instantly brightening up as you spotted your boyfriend. You had a few fans that you were talking to at the moment, so you tended to them first, while Jake made his way over to you.
You and Jake agreed that you wouldn't make your relationship too obvious at Vidcon, but all of that was left forgotten the moment that Jake saw you. 
However, as you ran up to him, people couldn't help but stop and stare.
Why wouldn't they? You were the living embodiment of Sanrio, that one Hello Kitty girl, whereas Jake was that one guy that made scary content and was often shrouded in darkness, dubbed as Youtube's personal Batman. Absolutely no one would have expected to see the two of you interacting with one another, let alone be within the same vicinity.
"Hi, Jakey," you smiled up at him, and Jake thought that he could die right there. With the amount of people staring, Jake had to restrain himself from throwing his arms around you and hugging you.
"Hey, baby," he grinned. 
Before either of you could do anything, you and Jake were interrupted by a shrill squeal. You whipped your heads around to see a young girl and her older brother, who still looked relatively young. They explained nervously that the girl liked your content, while the brother liked Jake's content. They were expecting to scour in order for each of them to meet either of you, but were surprised to see you and Jake in one place.
You and Jake took a few pictures with them, both individually. Though, the two of them requested a picture with both you and Jake in the same frame, which you happily did.
When they left, you and Jake shared a look, before going off together.
Vidcon Day 1: Over.
Jake returned to his hotel room, too tired to do anything other than wash up and order room service. 
As Jake laid in his half-hard hotel mattress, he scrolled through his phone. He was tagged in a lot of pictures and tweets, and he found himself grinning at a lot of the sweet words his fans left. Although he was tired, he could definitely do this a few more times, feeling invigorated by his fans.
As he scrolled, the trending Twitter hashtag caught his eye.
#HelloKittyMeetsBatman.
Interesting name, he thought as he clicked on it.
Jake's heart skipped a beat as he saw what came up.
Apparently, people were extremely surprised to see you and Jake so close to each other. 
There were so many pictures of you and him taken together from afar just from that one instance earlier, from multiple different angles and distances. Jake would admit, the way he was dressed in all black while you were dressed in cute pinks and whites was almost laughable.
What truly caught his attention were the captions of all these pictures.
"Craziest crossover of 2024."
"I'm crying they legitimately look like Hello Kitty and Batman."
"Jake Sim and [Name] interacting was not on my Vidcon 2024 bingo card."
"This is like seeing two worlds collide, absolutely wild but I'm pleasantly surprised."
For the most part, it seemed like everyone just thought that you and Jake were friends, but it was still a little funny how taken aback the entire internet was.
Then, he saw the picture of you, him, and those two kids together. 
"They look like a family," was one of the most popular retweets under that post. 
Family.
That word rang through Jake's head, before he buried his face in one of the pillows, giggling to himself. He felt a little ridiculous getting so excited over such a small comment, but he couldn't help it. He felt so giddy inside at the thought of having a family with you, and felt even giddier knowing that people could see it, too.
Suddenly, his phone rang. Jake wasn't going to answer it, too caught up in his flustered-ness, but when he realized that it was you, he quickly cleared his throat, instinctively straightening out his hair (because what if he accidentally turns on his camera?-- he needed to look good for you!).
"Baby," he greeted suavely, as if he wasn't just giggling like a schoolgirl seconds ago.
Maybe it was the fact that it was already getting late, or the fact that Jake barely saw you today, or the fact that you were just so goddamn perfect, but your voice sounded so attractive in that moment.
"Jakeyyy," you whined. "Come over."
His chest was already throbbing but Jake played it cool.
He chuckled. "What for?"
"I miss you," he could hear the pout in your voice. "And I want your attention."
It was rare for you to be so direct with him, and while Jake wanted to melt on the spot, he wanted to tease you a bit longer.
"What's wrong with just being on the phone with me?" Jake's lips pulled into a smirk. "You can just talk to me like this."
"Noooo," you said. "I want— I want you."
Jake tried his best to not crumble then and there, but it was too hard.
"Fuck," he muttered under his breath. "Okay then, baby. I'll come over right now."
He didn't miss the cute little "yay!" you let out before you hung up.
You were going to be the death of him.
"Eep! Jake, what are you doing here—?!”
You’re cut off when you realized that you were, in fact, backstage of one of your events. Today was the second day of Vidcon, and you had just finished up your first event. As you went backstage, carrying the little bags of gifts that your fans got you, you didn’t expect your own boyfriend to be waiting back there for you.
“Hey there, Princess,” he said cheekily, sprawled across the backstage couch. "Miss me?"
He opened his arms up, and you instinctively crawled into them, sitting on his lap and sliding your arms around his neck. 
As you did, you eyed him up and down.
Clad in black as always, he wore a black button-up, paired with black slacks, a black belt, and a loose, black tie. That's right: today, Jake was going to have a panel with a whole bunch of other horror creators, ones that transcended the internet— authors, authors that Jake spent his whole life reading and looking up to, which explained why he was dressed significantly more proper today than yesterday.
The way his shirt fit his chest and hugged his shoulders made it hard for you to not stare, and the way that it wasn't buttoned at the top, revealing his honey-tan collarbones, mixed with the scent of his rich cologne, made you feel dizzy.
"Ay, are you checkin' me out?"
On any other day, you'd be embarrassed, maybe even pushing him away, but today, you only nodded your head, humming mindlessly in agreement.
Jake blinked at you, before he pulled you in by the waist so that you were flushed against his chest completely.
"Kiss me," you mumbled, pushing his dark bangs away from his face.
Jake chuckled, rubbing your cheek with his knuckles. "What's with you these days? Getting so bold."
You only leaned into his touch. Maybe it was sometime in the LA air, or maybe it was the vigor that your fans gave you earlier, but all you could do was look at your boyfriend with glossy, wide eyes innocently, watching the way that his resolve trembled.
"Shit," Jake cursed under his breath. "Hold on—"
He grabbed your hips, then tilted your chin so that he could have a better angle. Your lips crashed into one another. Not in the way that a meteor would crash into Earth's delicate atmosphere, but in the way that gentle sea waves crashed onto themselves, dark folds of blue creasing over each other, only to brush up against the foamy seashore, none the wiser. 
Jake liked the taste of your lip gloss; it tasted sweet, but not nearly as sweet as you, hungrily squeezing your hips in his hands. He swiped his tongue over your bottom lip, earning a squeal from you, who tugged on his hair. 
When you pulled away from each other, you were breathless, chests heaving not for air, but for each other. You stared at each other for a few moments, losing time in each other's eyes, when your eyes trailed down.
God, the button-up and tie were going to drive you crazy.
Without thought, your fingers twirled around his tie, slinking up his chest before you yanked him harshly, jerking Jake toward you abruptly. 
In a moment of pure, unadulterated boldness, you attacked his neck, laying sticky kisses all across his skin. One hand laced itself in Jake's hair, keeping a firm hold of his tilted head, while your other hand crept around the buttons of his shirt. 
Each soft sigh that Jake let out made you only press more kisses on him. When he let out one particularly loud whine, his arm jerking up to grab at the couch's armrest, you knew that you found the sensitive spot on his neck. You pressed another kiss on that spot, this time sinking your teeth into his skin. The hickey was dark and purple, and when you ran your tongue over it, Jake's hands shot to your hips again.
"Shit, [Name], wait a sec—"
Skillfully, your fingers began to slowly unbutton Jake's shirt, just enough that you could see more of his chest. 
Your head was feeling fuzzy now, drunk off your desire for him. The way he threw his head back, his Adam's apple bobbing with each gulp of air he took in, curses falling from his lips, sent electricity coursing through your body.
When you unbuttoned the last button, you noticed the way Jake's eyes were squeezed shut, his other arm resting over them, hands balled into fists as his desperation for you increased.
"Jakey," you said. Jake was going to go mad, the way your voice was so soft and innocent as it said his name, all the while you were kissing and touching him in ways that made him go light-headed. He squeezed his eyes shut, another whimper escaping his lips. If he looked you in the eye right now, he was sure that he'd burst. "I want you to look at me."
He couldn't refuse you. Immediately, he opened his eyes, the arm strewn over his face dropping back to its position on your hips.
If he didn't die by combustion, Jake was certain that he'd die now— Your pupils were blown out, eyes lidded and staring at him like he was your prey to be slaughtered. He'd seen you wrought with desire so many times before, but the way you gazed at him like he was a piece of meat, like you were going to absolutely ruin him, made him feel weak.
"Watch me, Jakey," your voice sounded so sweet, but your actions said otherwise. You abruptly got up from your seat on his lap, Jake frowning at the loss of your touch. You dug through your purse thrown across the room, returning with a tube of lipstick.
You plopped back onto Jake's lap, making sure that he was watching as you applied it to your pretty, swollen lips. 
Then, you discarded it, throwing your lipstick to the side as you snatched his tie again. You brought the black fabric to your lips, staring your boyfriend down as you pressed kisses on his tie. You kissed it a few times, making sure that the color of your lipstick, as well as the shape of your lips, was well-imprinted on it.
Then, you yanked his shirt's collar toward you, pressing a harsh kiss on the fabric, making sure that the shape of your lips was once again imprinted on the fabric.
You looked back up at his face, unable to hide your smugness as his entire expression was painted with red.
"You're so hot—" Jake attempted to force out of his throat, but you only cut him off with a rough kiss to his lips. Without a word, you covered his face, from his forehead to his jaw, with kisses.
You pulled back to admire your work, before you pulled away from him.
"I have to be on stage in a few minutes," you said quietly, your back turned to him as you straightened out your skirt. Dumbfounded, Jake could only stare at you, but when you turned over your shoulder, flashing him a bright, but terribly cheeky, grin, Jake's heart fell out of chest. "I can't be late, right?"
With that, you left your boyfriend, all hot and bothered, on the couch, running off to prepare for your next event.
Almost immediately, Jake melted. He threw an arm over his eyes as he leaned back, letting out a groan.
Was this how you felt when he teased you?
Was he now sexually frustrated? Absolutely. But now he wanted you even more.
After mulling over it for a few minutes, Jake began to go back to his venue. But, as he passed the backstage vanity, he caught sight of himself in the mirror.
Some of it was obvious to him already: disheveled hair, messed up shirt. But what made Jake want to evaporate was the sight of his entire face and neck covered in lipstick marks. The corner of his lip had a big lipstick smudge, the hickey that you gave him earlier was so dark now, and he couldn't even dare to forget your lip imprints on his shirt and tie.
You little tease.
Jake's last straw was.... right now.
After the backstage fiasco, he didn't get to see you all day. That night, you had a PR event to attend with your fellow beauty creators, so he didn't get to see you at night either.
Which was why Jake was practically glowing with a dark and negative storm cloud as he pranced around the third day of Vidcon. It didn't help that he saw so many pictures of you and fans all across platforms. Poor guy almost lost it when one of your fans' vlogs blew up, the most replayed part being when you let out the most angelic and sweet laughs he'd ever heard in his life.
That should be him!
Meanwhile, Jake sat in the convention room at a panel. Lined up along the table were other horror creators, from authors to Youtubers to filmmakers, similar to yesterday. The way that this specific event operated was simple: fans got to ask anyone on the panel questions and they'd answer, which the entire room got to hear, and later there would be one-on-ones along the panel.
Jake was pulled out of his thoughts when one of the fans said that they had a question for him.
"Jake, your videos take a long time to make, how do you balance work and your personal life?"
Good question. He had a simple principle when it came to how to balance everything. Jake thought about it for a moment, before reaching for his microphone.
"I don't have any outright method," he began. Jake's mind flashed with your image: all the cute messages you'd send him throughout the day, all the times where after hours of rotting in front of his computer screen he could always count on your loving embrace to give him life, all times that he'd tune into your Spotify playlist so that he could be listening to what you were listening. It was easy to balance work and life, if it was you. "But I always put my life before the screen."
The room was quiet, intently listening to what Jake had to say. After all, he was renowned all across the Internet.
The room was quiet, intently listening to what Jake had to say. After all, he was renowned all across the Internet.
"To be clear, I understand the privilege of getting to work in a profession like mine," Jake continued. "I don't expect everyone to be able to follow my advice exactly, but the more I live, the more I realize that what happens before my very eyes will endlessly matter so much more than what happens in my own little Youtube bubble."
Jake's mouth jumped to you faster than his mind could stop him.
"My beautiful girlfriend is everything to me," he unconsciously began to grin stupidly to himself, "I'd put her above work any day if I had to."
The moment that those words left his lips, the room erupted with gasps and whispers.
"Wait, you have a girlfriend?!" one of Jake's Youtuber friends asked, leading the room to laugh.
Oh.
Shit.
Jake's eyes visibly widened. He clutched his microphone, bringing it up to his mouth, but no words came out.
There was no way in hell that he'd outright deny you, not even in a million years.
"I.... Well..." Jake stammered, trying his best to generate any words at all. He sucked in a sharp breath, a bashful expression making its way onto his face. "That's..."
The room filled with more laughter, alongside the teasing grins and pats on the back that Jake got from his colleagues.
"Oh, so that's what you were giggling about yesterday, lover boy..." Jay, also on the panel, quipped, his brows raised so high on his forehead that it could have touched his hairline.
"Sh-Shut up, Jay!"
Jake's chest felt fizzy. In a weird way.
A part of him felt on-edge. You and him always wanted to keep your relationship secret, for the sake of preserving it. He'd seen what the Internet did to relationships: it tore them apart. It wasn't like he name-dropped you, but he felt so... exposed, so vulnerable.
But at the same time, Jake felt his chest also swell with pride. That's right. He had a girlfriend (a hot girlfriend at that), a girlfriend that he was nefariously down bad for. He hoped everyone knew that, that he was taken and that if there was anyone that he'd spend the rest of his life with, it would be you.
Jake huffed. "Yeah, I have a girlfriend. What about it?"
No one questioned him further. Probably out of fear.
You were in the middle of trying your best to get through a conversation with some beauty guru that you knew one thing about: their personal makeup line launch failed horribly and they gave everyone hairy lipsticks. It was difficult, to say the least.
Exchanging your final regards, you quickly rushed back to your booth.
The first thing you saw when you checked your phone was a viral video, in which Jake admitted that he had a girlfriend. Your heart plummeted to your stomach when you initially read the caption, but when you watched the video, you had a difficult time processing your feelings.
Did you hate that Jake admitted that he had a girlfriend? … No, you didn’t. You didn’t at all. At a certain point, seeing the way that your boyfriend smiled so earnestly made your heart jump out of your chest. The way he was so giddy and smiley (of course, only you could tell that that was how he was feeling— to everyone else it probably looked like he was brooding) made your neck and cheeks warm up.
But, the way that the room erupted with voices and laughter, combined with the quirked brows of everyone on the panel, made you quiver.
You weren’t prepared for it, for how vulnerable you felt as a chorus of “ooh’s” filled the room.
Frankly, there were too many things that you had to focus on at the moment. You'd rather enjoy Vidcon now, and address it later, when things settle down. 
Pushing it to the back of your mind, you tucked your phone away, greeting another wave of fans. Though, not without taking an extra second to "heart" the post, adding it to your favorites folder, and rewatching the video one more time, feeling warmth and giddiness filling your chest.
As the cool night air kissed your cheeks, you fought the shy smile that seeped onto your face. It was late now, late enough that you could see all the city lights gleaming, lighting up the dark sky with blotches of all different colors.
There was a Vidcon party for creators, to celebrate the end of the event. Everyone was going. Although it was meant for any creator, there was a very exclusive VIP section; only those of high prestige could get in. Both you and Jake were invited, but upon realizing that nearly the entire hotel complex would be empty due to the popularity of the party, the two of you ditched it.
You'd been wanting to go to the rooftop hottub for a while now, but you never went because you wanted to go with Jake, and it was always too crowded for the two of you to go there comfortably. But now that everyone was gone, it was the perfect time.
Your boyfriend was already waiting for you up there, towel thrown over his shoulder with a shirt and swim trunks. His face lit up the moment he saw yours emerging from the elevator doors, rushing over to you to take your hands.
He paused for a moment. His dark eyes peered at yours, licking his lips before sucking in a sharp breath. Jake gave your forehead a peck, before saying a small "C'mon" and pulling you over to the hottub.
Jake took your towel for you, folding it next to his and perching it on a sunchair.
"They're gonna get off fireworks soon— Oh, damn," he cut himself off as you pulled your shirt over your head, revealing a bikini top. Your face scrunched up, squirming under his gaze. It's not like Jake has never seen you like this (in fact, he'd seen you in much more compromising positions), and it wasn't like he never complimented you, but as the hottub bubbled, the rosy scent of the water filling the air, you felt shy.
Jake slinked toward you, taking his own shirt off. 
"Hey there, Gorgeous," he said, his fingers playing with the hem of your shorts that had yet to be taken off. Your heart pounded in your chest, fighting the urge to squeeze your eyes shut and groan in embarrassment. You kept your eyes glued to the ground. Jake chuckled softly, before clutching your chin gently, making you look up at him.
"Don't get shy on me now, babe," Jake grinned when your lips pressed into an unconscious pout. He squished your cheek, relishing in the look of confusion painted across your face. Then, his hands fell to your hips, pulling them toward his. "You look so beautiful."
Jake's fingers hooked onto the hem of your shorts, meeting your eyes for permission before pulling them down himself, revealing your bikini bottoms.
Jake's eyes glazed over your figure, taking his bottom lip in between his teeth.
"Jaaakee," you whined, squeezing his hands.
"Sorry," Jake's eyes flickered up to your face. "I can't help it. You're just so hot, baby."
You rolled your eyes, biting back shyness, before you pulled him toward the hottub.
You rolled your eyes, biting back shyness, before you pulled him toward the hottub. 
The two of you got into the tub, sinking into the warm water, you felt your limbs relax. 
Vidcon was very fun, some of the most fun you've had in a while. But, it was very tiring, having to be around so many people at a time. And plus, it was hard not seeing your boyfriend whenever you wanted.
You pulled your knees to your chest. You could hear the loud techno music a few blocks away, probably coming from the club nearby. The bright night lights of LA was something that you could only imagine sleeping under.
Other than the sound of the city bustles, the hot tub’s jet system, and the occasional ripple of water, the night was silent.
“How was your day?” Jake broke the calm silence. The way the blueish water reflected off his skin made you dizzy.
“Good,” You cursed your voice for being so small. You swallowed the lump in your throat. You didn’t know why you felt so nervous. It was your boyfriend, for goodness’s sake!
Jake loved it when you were shy, but sometimes he was genuinely worried about you. Part of why he loved you was the game that was trying to figure out what was going on in that pretty head of yours.
He reached out for you, clutching your knee. "Baby, what's wrong?"
Your stomach churned. For a second, you thought about that video of him admitting that he had a girlfriend. It made your skin crawl, but when your boyfriend squeezed your knee, it all stopped.
"Nothing," you said simply.
There's a few pulses of silence, before Jake clicked his tongue.
"H-Hey—!"
Jake got up from the water, wrapping his hands around your waist, and hoisted you up so that your legs were thrown on either side of the body, before sitting back down so that you were perched right on top of his lap.
Your chest, nearly bare, pressed against his own bare chest in a way that made your heart race. The warmth of his skin as it contacted yours was an addicting feeling, enhanced only by the warm water surrounding you. Either it was the steam from the tub, or the heat collecting between the two of your bodies, that rose to your cheeks.
You rested your hands on his chest, your fingertips barely reaching his broad shoulders, while Jake’s hands stayed in their spot around your waist.
"C'mon," you could feel Jake's warm, strong chest rumble beneath you. "Tell me what's wrong."
Under the sky, his eyes gleamed, like two gems. For the flirt that he was, Jake was too genuine and pure of a person. The sincere worry in his eyes made you feel warm, even warmer than you felt right now. And sometimes that was enough for you.
You leaned into him, your hands coming up to cup his face. You rubbed your thumbs against his cheeks, to which he let his eyelids fall shut, relishing in the comfort that was your presence. Every time your thumb pressed against his lips, he kissed them, unable to hide the smile growing on his lips when you giggled softly.
At the corner of your eye, you spotted the purple hickey you left on him the other day. That combined with his wet hair, the water droplets temptingly running down his chest, and the fact that you were right on top of him made you feel light-headed.
Your hands left his face, and Jake opened his mouth to whine about it, but was shut up when your fingers tangled in his damp hair, pulling him in for a kiss.
It was a soft, innocent kiss, the type you gave when you just wanted to be close to him. Jake hummed against your lips, squeezing your thighs. You pulled away first, but Jake gently guided the back of your head back to his, pecking your lips.
"I just missed you," you said. You kissed his cheek. "I really missed you."
"It's only been a day," Jake teased you, but he knew better than anyone that he had absolutely no right to say that to you: he was practically dying each moment he couldn't see you.
The two of you sat in silence for a moment, staring into each other's eyes. You held onto his strong shoulders, eyes glued to his lips. You were feeling needy, needy in the way that you simply wanted to be close to Jake. You were already close to him, but you wanted to be even closer. Your heart thirsted for it.
Then, you heard a rustle, whipping your head around toward the sound.
"Nuh-uh," Jake whispered in your ear, gently holding your face and guiding it to look at him. "I want you to look at me."
It wasn't until a few seconds later that you understood why Jake's tone sounded so teasing: he was referencing you and him the other day backstage. 
"Stoppp," you whined, pushing your face into his neck. "You're so annoying."
Jake laughed, his chest rumbling. He stopped to admire the way you were all pressed up against him. He could feel every curve of your body, and he could feel the way your cheeks puffed with air, your lips forming a pout. He poked your cheek.
"You're so cute, baby."
"I know."
"What's with you getting so bold?"
"You're annoying me."
"Awww, you love me so—"
Fireworks fired off in the distance, painting the gray-blue sky with bright colors. 
You stayed in your position, only your eyes moving upward to admire the show. However, Jake stayed staring straight at you, practically ignoring the fiery flowers forming in the sky. He gazed into your eyes, watching the reflection in them.
"It's so pretty," you murmur.
"Yeah," Jake felt like he was falling into your eyes, "So pretty."
Just as another round of fireworks shot up into the sky, Jake grabbed your face, crashing his lips onto yours. Your lips fit into each other well, like puzzle pieces, in a way that was so satisfying, almost like you were made for kissing Jake. But for all of the desire and roughness that the kiss was filled with, it was a soft one. 
Jake swiped his tongue over your bottom lip, making you squeal and giving him the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth. His hands kneaded your body, roaming all over you with no intention of leaving a single part of your skin untouched. Likewise, you gripped his biceps, digging your nails into his skin to keep yourself grounded.
"Fuck—" Jake mumbled against your lips, only to get cut off by your lips attacking his— "Wait—"
Jake tasted sweet, like candy. He tasted like home, like love, like everything was going to be okay no matter what. How could you pull away now? 
"B-Baby, wait—"
"Stop talking, Jakey," you pulled away briefly, only to bite his lip, pulling on the pink flesh with your teeth. You let your tongue roam his mouth, feeling the warmth as your own hands began to wander his toned chest. 
"Just kiss me," you breathed.
You kept Jake like this for a few more minutes, trapping him in the heaven that was your lips. But when your bikini top began to untie at the back, something that Jake noticed immediately, he ripped away from you.
Something in his eyes had changed.
Quietly, he tied your bikini top back for you, ignoring your confused (and very breathless) gaze.
"If you keep doing what you do to me," he began into your ear, "I don't know if I'll be able to control myself."
With that, Jake threw you over his shoulder as he hoisted himself up to his feet. He grabbed everything that you brought to the rooftop, throwing your towel over you and ignoring you fussing.
"W-Where are we goin—?!"
"Back to my room."
You were in for a night.
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You and Jake were going to stay in LA for a little while longer after Vidcon, so you extended your stay in the same hotel rooms.
After last night, Jake and you fell asleep in his bed. 
It was going to be the best, Jake thought. Neither of you had anywhere to be, anyone to put on a show for. The two of you could sleep in for as long as you'd like. It didn't really matter to him, as long as he could wake up with you in his arms, he'd be all right.
Which is why Jake's heart dropped to his stomach when he woke up to you already dressed, pacing around the room nervously.
"Baby?" Jake was alarmed, even as he rubbed his sleepy eyes. "Baby, what happened?"
You whipped your head over to him, your expression pinch and painted with anxiety. 
"Check your phone," you muttered as you chewed your lip.
Jake did as you said. The moment he opened up his phone, his screen was filled with text messages from everyone: his colleagues, his friends, heck even his own mother. He was tagged in about a thousand posts all across his social media accounts, and his Youtube home page was plastered with his face. But not only his face. Your face too.
What caught his eye was an article from a major Internet news source that made its round across every platform.
Its headline?
Jake Sim and [Name] [Last Name] are reported to be dating.
The worst part was the cover page.
It was a photo of you and Jake, together in the hottub last night, with your arms thrown around his neck with your lips connected. When he read more into it, the photo evidence got more and more specific. Close-up pictures of Jake's neck to reveal a hickey and lipstick mark on his shirt, your smudged lipstick, a screenshot of the Sanrio plush in one of his videos, even that clip of his laugh in the background of one of your videos. Of course, the most crucial one was that clip of Jake admitting that he had a girlfriend.
This was what he wanted, wasn't it? For everyone to know about you, to be able to show you off.
Objectively, this was bound to happen.
But as Jake watched you pace around, your hands shaking as you looked like you were about to cry, he didn't feel the pride that he thought he would feel if everyone knew. He didn't feel happy, he didn't feel excited that he got to show you off. All he felt was a mix of guilt and anger.
And before he could reach out to hold your hand and pull you close, you quietly said that you were going to go on a walk, and left the hotel room.
The quiet that filled the hotel room was piercing. Jake stilled in his spot, still groggy and disheveled.
Had he always been like this?
He swore that at the beginning of your relationship, he took every measure to keep it private. Because you asked him to. Because he respected you.
Why did he throw it all away? 
He agreed to keep things private. 
But now he put you in an uncomfortable position and an even more vulnerable position than you'd ever been in before. 
Was he a bad boyfriend? Were you going to break up with him? Would your relationship with him ever be the same? That made Jake's heart palpitate. He couldn't lose you. No, he'd die. But then again, he fucked up, he knew that.
Jake ran a hand through his hair. This was an asshole move.
But he couldn't help feeling his fingers twitch for his phone when it ding'd.
The first thing he saw when he opened up Twitter were tweets at him.
And they were surprisingly... supportive?
"Emo boyfriend, cute girlfriend, the best combo!"
"Sending love to both of you. Hope you're doing well. We support you."
"I'm very pleasantly surprised."
"This is literally like Hello Kitty and Batman meeting this is crazy"
But as he scrolled deeper, he found more obscure comments.
"Feel so bad for [Name]. Her boyfriend is a freak."
"He doesn't deserve her."
And the nail in the coffin:
"No wonder they kept it a secret. I'd hide it too if someone like that was my boyfriend."
Why did you keep your relationship with him secret? Jake knew the answer to that: you just wanted to keep your personal life private.
But as Jake plunged himself deeper and deeper into the hole that was the media, he could only imagine alternative answers, and one stuck out.
Were you ashamed of him? 
Of course you would be.
You were beautiful in every capacity and just the most perfect person in the world. And Jake was just himself. You were always cute, and sometimes, Jake felt like he couldn't keep up with you. You were far out of his league. His content was considered "niche" and "obscure," of course people, maybe even you, considered him a freak.
He was a bastard, and you were a princess. He didn't blame you for being embarrassed about him.
That's why you were so anxious and against your relationship being exposed, right?
No, no, no!
Shut up, shut up, shut up, Jake thought, his hands balling into fists. You wouldn't. He knew you better than anyone, and he knew that you would never be embarrassed about him. You weren't like that, and he was a fool for even thinking of you in that way. He was being insecure and stupid.
But even so, as Jake let all the guilt, shame, anger, and anxiety settle in while he thought of an apology to you, he couldn't help but feel his insecurity seeping in.
You knew that you were overreacting. You shouldn't have left Jake in there all alone, you should have sat down and talked to him about it.
But there was something scary about having everybody's eyes on you at once, scorning you. You were a Youtuber, of course you knew what it felt like to be watched, but to have the entire internet so hellbent about your personal life made you jump into your own skin.
You just took a walk along the early city streets, you reflected upon yourself.
Why did you keep your relationship with Jake secret? 
Part of it was privacy. You didn't want the internet to interfere with your personal life, of course. 
But it wasn't like you wanted to hide your love for your boyfriend forever. It wasn't like you wanted to stow him away somewhere no one could find him. You were both adults, and you had to start living at some point.
You'd be lying if you said that you never thought about making a cute video with him, if you said you never wanted to post a cheesy anniversary picture on Instagram with a long caption just for him, if you said you never wanted the world to know that Jake Sim was yours.
You remembered the first time you and Jake talked about keeping it private. He was unsure, but because he cared so much about you, he agreed. Had you ever stopped to think about how he felt? You may have wanted to keep your relationship quiet, but did he? To a degree, there was something selfish about you, both now and in the past. You wanted to preserve yourself and your feelings, but you never even considered how Jake felt.
You were afraid, you felt vulnerable and too exposed to the world. But you cared far more about Jake than those fleeting emotions. Desire outweighed fear, you had to see him now.
But as you marched back to your hotel, your mind racing as you came up with paragraphs of words that you'd spill to Jake, you began to notice your worst nightmare.
A group of men, each with massive cameras that had even bigger microphones. 
They called themselves the paparazzi, but they were really only middle-aged men that made money off of being invasive towards people half their age.
Maybe you should have worn a hat, or something, as you were in a camera-infested area that was even more infested with celebrities and influencers. As they approached you, you quickened your steps, trying to get as far as you could from them. You tried your best not to make eye-contact, but alas, they got to you before you could escape.
"[Name]?" one of them called out your name, practically running to you.
Oh my god, you thought, ignoring them as you sped up. Please not right now.
"[Name], are you dating Jake Sim?" The sound of your boyfriend's name out of their mouths made your stomach churn. You kept walking, but you could feel them pointing their massive cameras at you, taking any measure to make a buck off of you.
You had a few choices.
You could make a run for it. Though, you had about six men double your age who would probably chase you down.
You could also give in to them, and give very vague answers. That would require a lot of patience, and simply, you wanted to go kiss your boyfriend, not talk to these so-called paparazzis.
Your last option was the one that seemed the most appealing, but could stir the pot of the media even more and it would give the tabloids what they wanted: you could tell them off and shut them down completely. The only issue was that you were the cutesy, sweet, Sanrio Hello Kitty girl. You've talked about adult topics before, but for you to be hostile and mean to another person? That was completely unheard of to anyone on the Internet. It would also be very reactive, and the media could twist that into something more.
But you wanted to get out of there.
You wanted to go see Jake. If you had to throw a few curse words at people if it meant that you could go home to Jake, then you'd use every curse under the sun.
"[Name], everyone is saying that your relationship with Jake Sim is real and not a publicity stunt. Any comment on that-?"
You were getting irritated.
You stopped in your tracks, turning over your shoulder.
"Will you fuck off?" Your gaze hardened on the group of men shoving cameras in your faces. You didn't even bother looking into the lens. "It's 10 in the morning, I don't have time for this."
"We didn't mean to offend you, [Name], we just wanted to know your relationship with Jake Si—"
You huffed to yourself, rolling your eyes. They loved acting polite only to violate your privacy. 
"Cut the bullshit, okay?" you narrowed your eyes. You were only a few meters from the hotel entrance, and they were still stalking you with their massive cameras. How shameless. 
Your anger was bubbling up inside you. It was rising, rising so much that you could feel it attempting to spill out of your mouth.
"You want to make a quick buck off of me so bad?" You stepped through the hotel doorway.
If the media was so curious about your life, and if they wanted to go so far as to try to disrupt your relationship, you wouldn't give them that satisfaction.
Everyone loved seeing what you were doing, everyone loved to watch you. It was your job to put on a show, to give people what they wanted. If you wanted to live, then you'd have to accept that.
You were an influencer, a micro-celebrity. You could make tides move if you wanted to. Why be so fearful of the eyes of so many?
But more than anything, you were a performer. And if that's what they wanted from you, that's what they'll get.
"Fine," you huffed. "I'll give you a story: me and Jake have been together for six years. In fact, we met each other in high school when he was my Physics lab partner. Go investigate that, won't you?"
With that, you slammed the hotel entrance door in their faces.
Jake swore he heard the trumpets of heaven when the hotel room door cracked open, revealing you.
He'd been waiting in front of it for a while now, and he jerked up immediately as he saw your face. He jumped right to his feet, ready to spill every word he thought of on you. You deserved an explanation.
But all you did was raise your hand, silencing him instantly. Instead, you took off your shoes, took his arm, and pulled him with you to the bed. You motioned for him to lay down, and did so yourself.
Jake stared at you like you were insane. Were you not going to yell at him? Why weren't you hitting him or telling him that you wanted to break up with him? Should he be on his knees begging you to stay at this point? But he complied (because of course he did, it was you).
You laid on his chest in silence, pressing your cheek up against him. 
That made his mind wander.
Maybe you were trying to ease him into a hard conversation. Maybe you were going to forget this until later.
He didn't want that. No, you deserved to hear what he had to say. If you were going to leave him, Jake wanted to say everything that he wanted to.
"I'm sorry," Jake blurted. The silence was deafening, before you took a deep breath, turning over onto your stomach so that your chin laid on his chest.
"What for?"
The gentle look in your eye as you looked at him made Jake choke up himself. He had to hold back or he'd start sobbing.
"For going against your wishes a-and..." Jake searched through his mind for all the words he practiced, but nothing came to mind. Not with you looking at him like you still loved him. "And for telling people about our relationship. I—I shouldn't have done that and I'm sorry for disrespecting the promise w-we made.... And... And—"
Jake sucked in a loud, sharp breath. His eyes were getting watery. He took your hands in his, squeezing them. 
"And I know that you're ash—ashamed of me, and I know that y-you won't— you won't want to be with me anymore, but—"
"Wait what?" you interrupted him, squeezing hands back. "I'm not ashamed of you, Jakey."
Jake stared at you.
Jakey.
"I'm not breaking up with you either. What makes you think that?"
The gate that was holding back Jake's emotions broke.
Jake let the tears that he tried so hard to hold back roll down his face. He let out a sob before he clamped a hand over his mouth.
You didn't hate him? You still wanted to be with him?
You instantly threw your leg over his hips, straddling him as you pulled his head to your chest. He melted into your touch, his wet face hiding in the crook of your neck. You pet his hair, pressing kisses to the crown of his head.
"Baby," you whispered into his ear gently. "Why are you crying?"
Jake's crying only got louder, and you couldn't help but giggle. He was a total softie. The way his hold around you tightened told you enough.
Jake sniffled through his words, cutting himself off every now and then with a hiccup and more sobs. "Th-Thought you were gonna l-leave me."
Your fingers stopped in his hair. "Leave you? Why would I?"
Jake pushed his face back into your shoulder, shaking his head.
You let him cry like that for a little while longer, whispering sweet reassurances in his ear as you patted his back. 
And when he was ready, the two of you talked it out, because that's what people did when they loved each other. You exchanged apologies, explained to each other your thought processes, and created an agreement: start anew, and you both didn’t mind that your relationship was now public, and if either of you disagreed, you had to voice it immediately. You ended it with a kiss.
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You clicked the camera on, checking in the viewfinder that you were in-frame. You were back at home, the pink Hello Kitty decorations in your room, as well as the scent of strawberries, surrounding you. 
“Hi, everyone!” you smiled brightly, clasping your hands together. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen you all. How are you?”
You chatted about a few updates since Vidcon, telling about your wonderful experience there and how you were so happy to meet all your fans.
“Now, onto the video!”
You peered to the side, where you spotted Jake sitting at the edge of your bed, waiting intently for your cue.
“Oh, Jakey!” you said in a sing-songy voice. “Come out now!”
With that, Jake popped into frame, dorkily saying a quick hi before plopping down onto the chair beside you.
“Today, I will be doing my boyfriend’s makeup!” you chirped happily. “Are you ready, boyfriend?”
The two of you shared a grin.
“Of course, girlfriend.”
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1K notes · View notes
covetyou · 6 months
Text
my bright future's behind me
joel miller x f!reader
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part 1 ⋆ part 2 ⋆ part 3 ⋆ part 4 ⋆ part 5
ao3 ⋆ main masterlist ⋆ series masterlist
pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader rating: Explicit (18+ only!) chapter warnings: dub con (reader is paying a debt), anal sex, rimming, anal douching*, oil as lube, oral (f receiving), mild spanking, masturbation (f), praise kink, brief sex toys mention, derogatory names (slut), drug reference, unspecified age gap. word count: 5.8k chapter summary: The line between wanting to help your father and wanting to see Joel again blurs, and you find yourself at a familiar door asking for help. You know what's in store for you this time... don't you?
*NO DETAIL reader is given brief instruction on how to do it, and agrees to. no description of the actual event.
A/N: it's lengthier than I intened, but I really enjoyed writing about this in detail okay, let a girl have some fun. Like yeah, our reader is living in a hellish apocalyptic society and is an anal virgin going to a drug dealer to pay a debt with some serious dubcon vibes, but that man is going to be soft and gentle (ish?) af with her butthole and make her enjoy the hell out of it, okay? okay. let's go.
follow @covetedfics and turn notifications on for updates on future work
song: anything but(t) by Hozier dividers: @saradika
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Five weeks ago, heavy feet had carried you away from Joel's door in a daze.
You'd spent the first day waiting for your fathers pain medication to kick in. You spent the next getting him up and ready to go find work again. It was like watching a newborn deer finding its first footing; once he was up, a few stumbles and he was off, throwing himself back into work. He'd even picked up his medication himself at the end of the second week - you'd offered to go for him, but he declined. You deserved the rest, he'd said.
He'd come back, pills in hand, proclaiming how much of a "nice man" Joel Miller was. You didn't disagree.
You spent that night, fingers buried in yourself, whispering Joel's name into the dark as you clenched around fingers too small to feel satisfying.
Every night since then you remembered the look of Joel through the haze of the orgasm he'd slapped out of you. The weight of his cock, glistening head leaking precum as he rutted against you, the pressure of being filled over and over. His face, mouth agape, eyes glued to where you joined, mesmerized.
You came every time, whether it was to the thought of the first push of his cock into you, the firm, repetitive slap of his hand against your bare pussy, or his cum spattering across your naked body.
You didn't just grind pillows any more. Not all the time anyway. You bit into them, hard, stifling moans that you didn't dare let echo around the bare confines of your room. You made yourself writhe in sheets on a bed that felt too small, fingers stuffed to the knuckle, unable to reach the depths you craved. You'd even tried spanking yourself, desperate to chase that zinging feeling he'd given your pussy that day.
Weeks had gone by, and you'd spent every one using your own hands to chase the feeling of Joel Miller between your legs.
And now, an opportunity to grab those feelings presented to you all over again and, although your father was in pain, a part of you you'd kept hidden for weeks was glad for it. Five weeks to the day, and you were stood outside of Joel's apartment once again.
You knew what to expect now, you thought. You'd done this before, it was familiar. He was familiar. You knew how he moved, the sound of his voice, the look on his face when he came.
So, arm raised and feeling braver than you had any right to feel, you knock on Joel Miller's door for the second time.
A moment passes. Then another. You hear nothing beyond the door, and think about turning to leave, when there's a sudden click of the latch and the door flies open.
You'd psyched yourself up all day, but standing here you come to the stark realization that you're not ready to see him again at all. You shrink at the expanse of him.
His eyebrows raise as he leans toward the door frame. His dark eyes look you up and down and you stand there like an idiot, staring at him like you've never seen a man before.
"Can't say I expected to see you again so soon," he says, ticking his head to the side, inviting you in.
You walk past him, he doesn't move from the door way again, and you squeeze into his home.
The door snaps shut behind him, his feet thudding on the floor as he walks up behind you. You stay facing into his living room, staring at a deep scratch on the dining table he'd placed his whisky glass on five weeks ago.
"What can I do for you, sweetheart," he says, and you can hear the shit eating grin in his voice. He knew it was a stupid question. There was no other reason why you'd be here.
"My dad. He needs more. He's bad again and we can't..." you trail off, your poverty unspoken but understood.
Your eyes are locked on the table, you're trying not to clench your hands into fists. You weren't nervous this morning when you'd made up your mind, and now, trapped in this room with him your blood hummed with nerves, anticipation, fear, arousal. It was a cocktail you weren't familiar with and it was making you lightheaded.
Joel's footsteps thud again and you hear the nearby open and close of a cupboard door. He rounds back, appearing in front of you holding another familiar packet. He shakes it and you hear the rattle of pills.
"You ain't got any debt to pay off this time, sweetheart. You can take these right now and owe me... or you can pay me off right now."
You were waiting for this, but even so his offer makes your breath stop and your heart pound. You weren't just expecting it, you were wanting it, and you had a feeling he knew and his offer just proved that. He may as well have said do you want me or not. Your answer would be the same.
"What'll it be?" he says, extending the pill packet out with two thick fingers.
You take a deep breath. "I can... I can do right now. I-if that's okay?"
You can practically see the gotcha flash across his eyes.
"S'more than okay, sweetheart," he says, pocketing the pills with a smirk and crossing his arms over his broad chest.
"You know the drill - show me."
You begin to undress for him, stripping off your jacket and simple dress you'd worn to accommodate the dwindling summer heat. You'd worn your best underwear this time, the black cotton bra, faded to dark grey over the years, actually lifted you and showed off the valley between your tits. Equally faded black panties sat high over your hips.
He watches you like someone would have watched a boring TV show years ago - almost disinterested, but watching anyway. You remove your bra, freeing your breasts and dropping it to the floor. Hands come to your hips to shimmy your panties down your legs when he suddenly moves toward you. You stop immediately. He walks past you, around you, circling like a vulture, assessing your nearly bare body. He's so close you can feel the heat radiate off of him, but he doesn't lay a finger on you.
He completes another half circle, stopping when he's directly behind you. He can see the way the skant fabric of your panties parts the cleft of your ass.
"Take 'em off," his deep voice comes from behind you, closer than you'd expected.
You bend - perhaps more than you usually would - and pull your panties down your legs, pulling them past your knees and stepping out of them as you rise.
Warm hands smooth down the plush of your hips and to the swell of your ass, gripping and lifting your cheeks briefly before releasing. Both hands smack back onto your ass before he speaks again.
"It's a damn shame I never got to do this last time."
He kneads your ass some more, the feel of his massive hands foreign, all things considered. He'd touched you in ways no one ever had, in ways that had you reeling and dreaming of them still weeks later, and yet he had barely ever really touched you. He touched your thighs and your wet cunt, he'd tasted you and been inside you, but his hands had barely ventured further than that. You were unkissed, relatively untouched, and totally, utterly, fucked.
You steady yourself just as he withdraws, leaving your skin burning for him to touch you again.
"C'mon, bedroom. Got somethin' for you." You hear a smirk in his voice. You don't think the grin has left his face since you got here.
Once in his room, he pulls open a drawer on the large dresser. You peer inside. Colorful shapes fill it - you know these things, you've seen them before, but not in a long time. The last you'd seen being your own as you frantically stuffed underwear into a bag, ready to leave your home during the first evacuation at the end of the world.
The man is a god damned a sex toy collector.
"Why do you have all that?" Fuck. The words are out of your mouth before you can stop them. If there's anything you shouldn't do, it's question a strange man about his sex toy collection.
He leans toward you, whispering in mock conspiracy, "I use 'em on sweet girls who come to see me when they can't pay."
He pulls out an unfamiliar object. You had seen the other things in the drawer before, but you'd never seen this.
"You know what this is?"
It looks like a fucking mutant turkey baster.
You shake your head.
"It's an anal douche, sweetheart." He trails a finger down your arm, the skin pimpling in its wake.
"You never seen one before, let alone used one, huh?"
You shake your head again. Your body immediately set on fire with the mention of it. He'd ghosted a finger over your asshole last time and promised you that he'd have it next time. Now, here you were. Next time. You'd be lying if you said you didn't get off from those exact words, if you hadn't tried touching yourself in the same way, going further and breaching yourself with a spit slicked finger, stopping barely a fingernail in, embarrassed even by yourself in the dark.
"You're gonna fill that up. Put that nozzle right in your pretty little asshole. Squeeze," he says softly, squeezing your arm. "Hold it in there for a little bit, and then you go push it out. Okay?"
You stare at him in dumbfounded silence - you'd never heard of this before and felt naive. One hand comes up and clasps your jaw, snapping your mouth shut, as he forces your head into a nod. He hands you the douche, and you take it. It's soft, but the nozzle is hard and unyielding.
"Good. Now you're gonna do that till the water runs clear, you got that? Don't want no messes." He moves to your side, looking between your face and your ass. Your face heats as his calloused hand smooths over your ass, giving another light slap to one of your cheeks.
You don't know what makes you do it, but you start talking. Rambling. Maybe panic at the unfamiliar had taken over, the nerves too much to bare, but the words are out of your mouth before you can stop them.
"Or we could do the same as last time! I could even -" he cuts you off.
"You'll do this. Don't want anythin' else. Way I see it, I'm the one callin' the shots here. Of course, if you'd like me to do it for you..."
"What?!" you yelp in shock, your embarassement growing threefold. "No, no, please I-"
A dark laugh escapes his lips, he was fucking with you. "Didn't think so. Now, go on. You don't want to make a mess, do you?" You feel your cheeks heat with the preemptive embarrassment of that happening.
"I-I'll do it," you stutter, nodding your head once and looking down at your feet, willing the heat in your face to go away. You wanted what this led to, at least you thought you did. You'd thought about it enough, at least.
A kiss presses into your hair, the unfamiliar action melting your bones, sending you soaring. "Good girl."
A slap to your ass brings you back into the room.
"Get to it then, sweetheart. I'll be waiting outside. I want you clean, so no rushing."
The warmth of him moves away from you, back into the living room. You follow, watching, and he gestures to a partially open door next to his bedroom. You didn't pay attention to it last time, fear and tunnel vision blinding you to most of the details of his home.
You enter, close the door behind you, and take a shaky breath as you lean against the cool door.
You can do this. You just hope to fuck he doesn't hear a thing.
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Joel is lounging on his couch reading a worn book when you exit the bathroom 15 minutes later.
"All good?" he says, not bothering to look up.
"Mhm," you nod. You didn't trust yourself with words and honestly, you had no real clue. You'd never done any of this before. You'd had thoughts, sure, but you were not familiar with any of it in practice.
He's up and moving toward you in an instant, the book thrown to his dining table as he passes it. You think you can see a growing hardness in his pants as he walks.
He looms over you, tracing gentle shapes over the bare skin of your upper arm, watching your nipples harden and a shudder run down your spine.
"Let's get you someplace more comfortable," he says with a softness to his voice that doesn't meet his eyes. His eyes are dark and molten.
He leads you back to his room and deposits you at the end of his bed once again. You stand awkwardly, hands and feet flexed in an attempt to push away your nerves. If Joel notices, he doesn't say anything.
"I've never-" you start.
"Oh, I know you've never had anything back here," he says, coming to stroke down your back and over the curve of your backside. "If you did you wouldn'ta jumped away from me last time."
Any humiliation that was bubbling beneath the surface floats away as he strokes gently over your hips and ass. The roughness of his hands against your soft skin makes your pussy thrum. If you were being honest, you'd turned up to his door wet and ready. By this point you were positively dripping.
"Have you ever..." you say breathlessly, closing your eyes. He laughs, it's raspy and deep, the sound of it sending another trickle from your pussy despite the anxious feeling in your belly.
"You ain't even the first I've ass fucked this week, sweetheart."
With that, he wordlessly moves you into place, turning you to face his bed, legs slightly parted. A hand comes between your shoulders to he push you down, making you hinge at the hips to bend over. Joel steps back, leaving you there nude, bent over his bed, and alone.
"Spread yourself for me."
You let out a shaky breath you didn't realised you'd been holding and reach behind you, gripping one plush ass cheek in each hand as you spread yourself for him. He approaches again, only to grip the meat of your ass with his massive hands to spread you wider, exposing both your holes completely to his gaze.
You slam your hands down on the bedsheets to steady yourself, the sound of blood rushing through your ears as you think of how much he's staring and where he's staring. Someone didn't tell your pussy this was meant to be embarrassing though, and you feel your heartbeat in your cunt.
Strong hands knead at you, pulling you apart and pressing you together over and over. You can hear Joel's breath get deeper behind you, enjoying the sight of your ass being manhandled.
Turning, you look around and up at him. His eyes are transfixed, and he's nodding gently, tilting his head from side to side as he drinks you in from every possible angle.
"Fuck yeah," he murmurs, looking up at you as he notices your stare. "Beautiful ass, sweetheart. You gonna let me play with it?"
You already want to moan. As if you fucking wouldn't let him play with it now.
You bite your lip and nod at him.
"Ain't I lucky," he grins, before crouching behind you. You feel a nip of his teeth on your ass cheek, then the same on the other. Your breath catches when you feel his tongue dip down into your folds, catching your clit and swiping upwards through the wetness of your pussy, pushing in briefly to taste you. He does it again, and again, and again. You're moaning softly with each swipe, his tongue moving closer to your ass with each lick. You're pouting, trying not to whine, when he pulls away just before he touches your tight ring.
"Someone's enjoying this," he mutters into your ass, soft lips placing another kiss to your cheek as he circles a finger around your dripping cunt.
Fuck yes I am.
You hear him laugh behind you, the puff of air from his nose fluttering across your spread holes. Your eyes go wide, realizing you'd been so lost in it all that you'd said it out loud.
He moves away from you completely, reaching to drag pillows down his bed. A tap to your ass prompts you to move.
"Get comfortable, sweetheart, might be a while."
Draping yourself over his pillows, you get to your knees and rest your forearms on the bed. He's moving around behind you when you duck your head lightly, trying to be discreet as you breathe in the rich scent of him from his pillow. The smell of him fills your lungs, leaving no space for nervousness now.
The bed shifts as Joel climbs on behind you, a hand stroking up your thigh. You can't help but sigh. You were really enjoying this - your dad and your 'reason' for coming here long forgotten.
Hands pull you apart once again, and he's back to kissing across both your cheeks. He returns to where he's spread you, and you feel the scruff on his chin scratch against your ass, another huff of his breath, and then a warm, wet tongue is finally licking over your asshole.
Your toes curl as he licks you in gentle circles, tasting you. You'd never felt anything like it, the sensation strange and not exactly as exhilarating as you were expecting. And then he moans and you finally get it.
"Oh."
He wiggles his tongue gently into your tight hole, not quite breaching you but adding a pressure that has you pushing back into him slightly, willing him on. A broad lick and a kiss to your hole later and he's pulling away again. He keeps pulling away but you're desperate for him to continue.
"Good girl. Stay nice and relaxed just like that for me, okay?"
"Okay," you whisper into his pillow.
"Just a little longer, sweetheart," he says, stroking a finger up and down over your asshole.
There's a small snick behind you, and the finger stroking you pulls your cheek to the side.
A dribble of something cold, thick, and wet trickles over your asshole, and drips down to your cunt. You flinch and wiggle at the feeling, but a hand clamps down around your calf, keeping you in place.
"What's that," you gasp.
Hand on your calf keeping you steady, you hear another snick behind you. A finger traces the trail the substance took, up from your pussy, spreading the slickness of it around as he gets to your tight hole.
"Cooking oil. Ain't no lube in the fuckin' apocalypse and I don't wanna go in dry. Tear my dick straight off, and I quite like you havin' two holes instead of just one."
The tip of his thick finger, slick with oil, pushes into your asshole. You take a deep breath and the pressure gives way, allowing his finger to breach you. The hand on your calf releases, and traces up to your ass, squeezing.
This is as much as you'd ever managed with yourself, but with Joel doing it, it feels so much more. The tip of one of his fingers so much thicker than yours, and the oil easing his way so much better than your spit slicked finger.
He wiggles and swirls the finger just inside your hole, and you whimper, toes clenching. This is nothing like his tongue. Something like this shouldn't feel so good, none of it should, but the embarassment is long gone and all you want is more.
The finger pulls from you before he can give you what you want, and you feel more oil being poured onto you.
You arch your back, hoping he'll go right back to what he was doing, and he does. Finger to your asshole, he circles gently once, before pushing in again, not stopping at one knuckle this time.
"Nnngh," you moan, as his finger settles deep into you.
"All the way in all in one, good fuckin' girl."
He pulls out half way before pushing back in, fingering your ass with his index finger and holding you open with the other hand so he can get a clear look at your ass taking his finger.
There's no stretch, just a fullness, and goosebumps prickling over you as he moves in and out. You settle into it after a few more pumps, skin calming as you do.
"How's that feel?" he says. He must have seen you relax back down into his pillows, or felt it as his finger moved inside you more easily.
"S'good," you mumble into his pillow.
"You like my finger in your ass?"
"Mm," you moan, as he picks up the pace, fucking you a little harder with his thick digit.
"Let's get another in you, huh? Sweet pussy would like that too, I can see her twitchin'."
He begins to curl his finger, swirling it around and stretching against your hole. Your skin prickles again and you let out a whine, the fullness and added stretch feeling so good.
The finger retreats again but it's quickly replaced with the feeling of two pushing into your ass, one slipping in just before the second starts to spread your hole further than ever.
You groan deep and low, the sound being pulled from your chest without warning. When he's down to the knuckles of his fist, he holds there, twisting and scissoring them deep in you.
You're breathing heavy, whimpering, as Joel plays with your asshole. At one point you hear the snick of the bottle again and feel his fingers withdraw half way before spreading, creating a valley between them and spreading your asshole open for him, when a drizzle of oil is poured onto them. His spread fingers funnel the oil into your ass, and he pushes them back deep into your needy hole.
Over and over, he pulls his fingers completely from you before punching them in quickly, giving you no time to recover as he watches your hole barely wink closed each time.
"Nice and oiled up now, sweetheart. Just a little more. Wanna see somethin'."
His voice is thick and heavy, loving watching the way your ass is taking his fingers, listening to the whimpers and moans you try to hold back.
He's not touched himself, but you can tell he's rock solid and desperate just from touching you. You lick your lips at the thought of his cock, remembering the faint taste of him he'd smeared on your mouth weeks ago, and you feel more slick drip from you.
It was funny, if you thought about it. The attention to your cunt last time such a stark contrast to the neglect it was receiving now. You didn't mind.
Slicked fingers speed up in your asshole, really fucking you now, your ass jiggling with each thrust of his hand. You let out a high pitched whine, and he fucks you through it, before burying his two digits deep in your ass. He keeps pushing against you, never ending pressure making him feel deeper and deeper than he is. As if reading your mind, his other hand comes down to swipe drips of oil across your clit, using the tips of his fingers to rub in soft circles.
He keeps the pressure in your ass, releasing and pushing rhythmically so it feels like he's fucking you impossibly deep. Another wave of goosebumps cascades over you, and you feel your neglected cunt tremble.
"Joel I - fuck - I'm gonna come. Please, I-" you gasp, holding onto the pillow tighter with one hand but scrambling frantically with the other, not knowing what to do. The pressure is so deep, so foreign, but so incredible. You've never felt like this.
"Fuuuck yeah," he grunts from behind you, pushing his fingers deep in you again. Instead of releasing them, he starts shaking his fist, fingers still buried in your tight asshole. His other hand swipes over your clit in tandem, and you feel it.
The crashing wave of it comes for you, and there's no running. You're consumed by him; nothing but the scent of him in your lungs, and his fingers deep inside you. Moans that only he has ever pulled from you. Nothing else exists. The world falling to shit, caring for your ailing father, the years of loneliness at the end of the world. Gone - chewed up and spit out and gone, all at the hands of Joel Miller.
Before you know it, your thighs and cunt are twitching as an orgasm batters into you, knocking the air out of you with a scream you can't give sound to.
"Comin' from bein' ass fucked, thatta girl. Filthy fuckin' girl," he pulls his fingers from your ass as you still twitch, riding through your orgasm totally empty. A slicked up hand slaps your buttcheek, sending another aftershock through you.
Joel rises to his knees and you hear the tell tale clatter of his buckle through the white noise in your head - you'd long forgotten you were nude and he was not.
You look around to see him stroking his thick cock with an oily hand. You whine, you could come again just from watching. Every nerve in your body is on absolute fire.
He slides his slick hard length up your ass, rutting himself against your crack.
"I'm fucking one of your holes today, sweetheart. Don't have to be this one though, but I'd like it to be."
"I want it," you moan without hesitation.
"That's a good girl," he says, sliding his cock between your cheeks a little quicker. "You give me what I want, and I give you what you want."
His solid cock pulls away from you, and he rests a hand on your lower back, pushing down on you gently to hold you still. You feel the tip of his cock drag down through the slick of your pussy before he swipes back upward toward your ass.
Knuckles drag across your ass as he pushes his hips forward, the tip of his cock in line with your hole. A firm press of his thumb to the tip of his cock, and your asshole gives way, letting him slip in.
"Would you look at that," he says, before pulling his thick tip out of your ass. You immediately feel more oil drizzle into your hole, still opened from his slicked head breaching you.
He pushes back in, even easier than before. The stretch of it sends the most ferocious wave of goosebumps over you yet, drawing a babbling moan out of you.
"Jus' look at that," he groans, eyes locked on his cock fucking into your asshole. He fucks his tip in and out of you for a moment, your moans dying down as you adjust to the feeling, before his hips push forward again.
"Fuck, I could just slip all the way in sweetheart," he says, pushing deeper into you. "All the way in." As he says it, he slips his cock further into you with ease, sliding down impossibly far in one smooth thrust.
He stills. You feel so full, so stretched, but you don't feel the weight of his balls against you, or the heat of his warm belly. There must be more to go, but this is already so much. You whimper, almost begging him to pull out, when a hand slips around between your legs and starts lightly caressing your pussy.
"If you want more you're gonna have to ask for it."
"P-please, Joel. I want more."
Finally, he pushes all the way in, his entire dick encased in your oiled heat. He throws his head back with a groan, drowning out your whimpers as he bottoms out, grabbing both of your hips to steady himself.
"Fuuuck."
There's so much of him in you, you try to wiggle forward to relieve the pressure, even with both his hands clamped on your hips.
"Hold still," he shushes you. "Hold still and take it."
You'd do anything he told you right now. You quieten and let him push into you more, his dick twitching in your ass sending a jolt through you. You can feel his balls on your cunt, slicked up from your pussy and the oil covering you.
"Hold that slutty little hole open for me," he growls.
There is no hesitation in you as you reach back with both hands to spread your cheeks for him. Your grip is hindered by the oil, but you hold firmly and pull, spreading yourself and allowing him even deeper into your ass. He was quickly making being spread for him your favorite thing in the world.
He pulls out, leaving just the tip in you once again, before fucking all the way back in in one motion, pushing the air out of you when his pelvis meets your thighs.
Somehow you still hold yourself open, moaning and rocking your hips, and he fucks into you, his large hands on you pulling you toward his cock with each thrust.
Joel's breathing is heavy as he fucks into your ass, grunting softly every so often. He shuffles his legs as they slip away, unable to get purchase on his sheets in the constraints of his jeans.
They slip again and he slams into you, hard, with a growl.
"Fuck," he grunts in frustration and you hear the frantic shuffle of fabric as he pulls his pants down his thighs, his dick still buried in your ass. His belt clatters again, and he quickly pulls out of you. The bed rocks as he moves to discard his jeans, before he climbs back behind you, placing his feet either side of your knees. You try to look around in confusion, but then he lifts your hips, lines himself up, and in one smooth move, he's pushing his entire cock down into you.
"Oh, fuck," you whine, high pitched and desperate.
You let out a keening high pitched scream as he pulls out and slams into you again, and then he's fucking you in earnest.
He's like an animal, grunting as he ruts into you, fucking his cock down deep into you so far you swear you can feel your organs shift.
"That's it, she's likin' it now, huh. She's fuckin' likin' it now," he snarls.
"Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes," you chant with each gasping breath.
Your hands slap down onto the bed, white knuckle gripping the sheets as he pounds into your asshole from above.
"Ohhhh, yes - fuck - yeeaaahhhh," you groan. You can't tell if you're coming, it feels so good that you could be but it doesn't feel the same. You have definitely never felt this before.
"Takin' it so - fuck - fuckin' well, sweetheart," he gasps. "So. fuckin'. well."
He speeds up, pounding faster and faster, his balls smacking against the meat of your ass.
"Gonna come in this fuckin' asshole. Gonna get my cum all up in you."
"Please," you don't know what you're begging for, but his thrusts accelerate and that might just be it. You're screaming around him, his hips stutter, slamming into you. Joel's thighs quiver with the force of his orgasm, rattling the entire bed as he shakes and unloads deep into your ass.
You've deafened yourself. You've maybe came, you can't tell. All you know is your body is on fire and your mouth is dry. You could sob and you don't know anything, you just know it feels so good and so much.
Not knowing what to do with yourself, you lie there, face down, in a daze.
Joel lowers his shaking knees to the bed, still buried in your ass. His grip on your hips relaxes, fingers unconciously soothing you in gentle circles. His breath is heavy, and for a moment you feel him lean over your spent body to press a kiss to your back, before he retreats, pulling out of you and leaving your asshole still full of him.
You don't know how long you're there, ass still in the air, head floating through a million different universes, too fucked out to care you're still naked on Joel's bed.
"C'mon, sweetheart," says Joel, his voice gruff from heavy breathing. "Gotta get you home." You feel his oily hand softly pat you on the thigh, bringing you back to reality.
There's a thump as your clothes hit the bed, and you look around to see him for the first time since he put his dick in your ass. He's fully dressed again already, running a hand through his graying hair, sweat patches blooming on his t-shirt.
You nod at him and sit up - the floaty feeling has escaped your head and is buzzing all through your veins, creating a distance between you and your body. You mindlessly dress yourself, and he watches.
When you stand, your legs are somehow steadier than last time, and you don't even stumble as you pull your panties up the rest of the way.
Joel guides you out of his home, no offer of a hand or a touch to steady you. You slide your feet into abandoned shoes when he unlatches the door and pulls it open. Fishing around in his jean pocket, he pulls out the packet of pills, holding it out for you to take.
You thank him, taking the pills and walking from his apartment. You don't turn, intending to walk away from him before he can close the door on you again.
"I'll make you a deal," he calls out to you. You stop in your tracks. "You keep comin' to collect for your daddy and I'll give you those pills for free."
You frown and turn to look at him. He's standing in the doorway with his arms crossed like you'd just arrived. "That's not free. I won't whore myself for pills."
He lets out a wry laugh, "You already are, sweetheart."
Shaking his head, he closes the door on you once again, leaving you alone in the hallway.
And he still hasn't kissed you.
next part
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adventuringblind · 10 days
Text
Band-Aids are for Speed
Lando Norris x Reader
Genre: Fluff, Street Racer AU
Summary: The five times she patched Lando up, and the one time he patched up her.
Warnings: Injury descriptions, broken bones, cuts, bruises, blood, illigal street racing, car accidents
Notes: Author is not a doctor but has watched medical dramas... don't judge my knowledge!
Side Note: I hope le requester enjoys this as much as I enjoyed writing it!
Masterlist // Request Form // My Website // buy me a Ko-Fi
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The first time she met Lando, he was siting in the emergency room waiting to be stitched up. She quietly hums to herself while setting up as the other nurse changes places with her.
The deep gash on his arm makes her wonder what he did to get it, but she also knows better then to ask. He doesn't look like he's in the mood to talk anyway.
It takes approximately three minutes for her to retract that statement. "So, you come here often?"
The question takes her so of guard that she doesn't know what to do with it aside from take the next few seconds to process. Is it not obvious that she works here?
"Do you mean the hospital? Or in this room specifically?" She laughs lightly at the ridiculousness of her patient and blames the minor blood loss.
"Nah, I mean in my presence." He smirks.
She tries to focus on her work. "Can't say I have."
"Would you like to be in it more?"
He gives her his number before he leaves. He dots the 'i' in his name with a heart.
She texts him the second she gets him to ask if he's bless her with his presence again.
♡♡♡♡♡♡
In the few months they've been seeing each other she's learned that Lando is obsessed with cars. It's cute when he jumps into excited rants about his favorite subject.
With the amount they've been talking, it's not shocking that Lando texts her in the evening. She assumes it'll be another silly joke. Instead she's met with frenzied sentences and misspelled words about need medical attention.
She doesn't hesitate to drive to his place. In hindsight, she really should've asked him why he didn't go to A&E when he's bleeding all over the bathroom floor.
"Please tell me you didn't get jumped." She kneels down and sets about getting him a position where she can see what she's doing.
He groans in pain as she moves him. "Nope! It was spectacular though."
"What do you mean by that?"
"I crashed the car but still won." He lets out a triumphant hoot.
This man can never give her all the details at one. "You got in a car accident?! How is that winning?!"
"Because I won the money... duh." He's definitely delirious now. Probably has a concussion. "Oh, I didn't tell you? I street race."
There's that strange part of her that is intrigued and curious to know more, specifically because that adds to his sex appeal (like he wasn't hot enough already). The logical side of her brain that is currently staring at Lando bleeding says otherwise. "Uh, no... you didn't."
"Well isn't that unfortunate! You coulda seen me crash today if you had."
Lando is half asleep by the time she is done. She's barely able to wrangle him into bed with how uncoordinated he is. It's useless keeping him awake.
She turns the lights off and is about to leave - "Will you stay?"
"I can, yeah, do you want me on the couch or is there another bedroom?"
"In bed with me. You can stay here - with me."
Against her better judgment, she does.
♡♡♡♡♡♡
She doesn't usually work the weekend shift but one of the nurses is on vacation and she could us the extra hours. She leaves her phone on vibrate in her pocket in case of a 'family emergency.'
Said emergency being Lando who is more accident prone on the weekends. Somehow, less accident prone in the car and more when he's doing normal people tasks.
Sometimes she wonders if her gets hurt on purpose just so he has an excuse to see her. She keeps telling him he doesn't need one - just in case - but he still calls and she goes. It's not like she has much else to do with her time aside.
She really shouldn't be shocked when he ends up in emergency clutching his arm. He gives her a bashful smile and tries to awkwardly wave. "Hi."
"And what, my love, are you in for this time?"
"I slipped on the stairs..."
Another male, a tall brunette who she knows as George, hits him playfully on the head. "No he did not! This idiot decided it would be a brilliant idea to tie a skateboard to the back of Alex's car and sit on it while Alex drove."
She throws a stern look at Lando and his smile goes from bashful to downright embarrassed. "You're lucky it's just you're arm."
By the time he's set free into the world to make more impulsive decisions, she makes the executive decision to make him wait until she's done working. He puts a pout on his lips, but it goes away when she sends him to the cafeteria.
They drive home listening to the indie station. The one he's made her fall in love with.
"Thank you, again."
"You've got to stop thanking me, Lan. It is literally my job." She laughs a little at herself for that one.
"Yeah, but, that's not all. You're the only person who doesn't freak out on me for doing stupid shit. Like I know I shouldn't do it but it gives me that adrenaline that racing does." The sincerity in his voice nearly takes her off guard.
"I can't tell what to do, but I'll always be there when you need a patch job."
"And I'll be there when you need a ride." He winks.
♡♡♡♡♡♡
The first time she's at one of Lando's races, she can feel the thrumming in her heart. The excitement of the start and the fear that he could possibly die doing this.
He jogs over to her right before the start. His hands clumsily find her waist and he smash his lips on hers. "For good luck." He whispers as he pulls away.
She doesn't let go, however. She pulls a band aide out of her pocket and sticks it to his hand. It's a crayon, but she highly doubts he'll care to much.
"What's this for?"
"I had a little girl today who told me that Band-Aids give you speed. I thought you might try it."
"When I win, it'll be all because of you."
Lando does win. She buys more Band-Aids with some of the prize money.
♡♡♡♡♡♡
She's there when the crash happens. The boys had deemed her the official medical personnel. Which she's glad for, since they are the ones getting her to the crash site. In record time - it has to be - she's sure she's never gone this fast before.
She dives out of the back of the truck to the driver side door. Lando sits there, a few visible cuts, but he's smiling at her. She has half a mind to give the boy an earful, but refrains since he did just crash.
It takes her, Alex, and George to get him out of the car and into the truck. She stitches him up before they go home. In her car, mind you, since the one Lando drove is out of order.
"I'm sorry..."
"Don't be - just - please remember that I can't fix every kind of injury."
They curl up in bed together. The long night having drained them both of their energy.
"Maybe, but at least my odds of surviving until my thirties have gone up with you around."
"At this rate, you're more likely to die doing dishes then driving."
"That was one time!"
♡♡♡♡♡♡
It wasn't supposed to be this way. She was supposed to go home, not end up back at her job.
Granted, she's here for a different reason now. One that's not her fault and she's pissed about it. She's going to explode with emotions. Her body hurts so much.
Fucking drunk drivers. Who gave them the right to say it's her fault? Telling her she's lucky it wasn't worse.
A soft knock at the door draws her attention. Lando stands there look mildly disheveled. Still, he has his hands on his hips and rolls his eyes. "Whatever am I going to do with you, my love? Always getting into accidents!"
He comes to lay beside her on the bed and she wiggles to make accommodate him. He pulls out a box of bandages from his pocket and proceeds to put them everywhere she has a new mark.
The stress of it all finally breaks through. She sobs into his shoulder and clings to his sweatshirt. "Thank you."
"Hey, none of that. I owe you for all the Band-Aids you've used on me and all those times you've patched me up."
"Does this mean I can drive your car now? Since I have extra speed?"
Lando raises his eyebrows. "Maybe not drive, but I can think of other things we can do with speed." He wiggles said eyebrows suggestively.
"How about, a speedy recovery? You have plenty of those."
"Alright fine, a speedy recovery - and I'll be here for all of it with a plethora of crayon Band-Aids because I bought them all just for you."
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Note
another sickfic/period prompt.. living together as friends/housemates and H finds her on the floor in the night feeling really sick from her period and sits with her + helps her out 🥲 changes her sheets for her, rubs her back and just holds her on the floor with a blanket round them. she's absolutely mortified with no choice but to be accepting of his help and all he wants to do is make her feel a little better :(
Period Cramps Are No Fun
AN: thank you for this request. it's not exactly as the request said but i hope it's close enough. and i normally don't write harry as anything other than y/n's lover but made an exception with this story. please share your feedback with me and let me know how you liked it. enjoy. xoxoxoxo
This story contains: small period leak, severe period cramping, puking due to period cramps, crying due to pain and embarrassment, mentions of sex toys, comfort, fluff
{ housemate!harry - friend!harry - softrry - any harry era - au!harry }
word count- 1,956
You wake up in the middle of the night with severe period cramps and when your housemate and friend Harry happens to wake up for a glass of water, he sees you on the bathroom floor crying and has no choice but to be by your side and comfort you.
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You were looking to be someones flatmate or housemate. You'd put offer after offer online and one day a guy named Harry accepted your offer. He had a pretty nice townhouse in London and from his brief description of himself, seemed to be an alright guy. You didn't want to move in with some lazy scumbag and you'd come to find Harry is the opposite of that.
He's probably the cleanest guy you've ever met. He enjoys keeping things organized and loves to keep the house smelling fresh with candles on every shelf and table. And you get along quite nicely. You'd even go as far to say over the six months of living in his townhouse that you've become friends.
Doing things friends do such as order take-out food together, watch movies on the couch, paint each others nails, share juicy details about your love lives (or lack thereof). Harry is a very fun guy to be around and if you're being honest with yourself, you'd say you've developed a slight crush on him. I mean how could you not? He has nearly all the characteristics of what every woman's ideal man would have. Physical characteristics and things through the actions he does.
Now even though you've became great friends over the six months of living here, there is still stuff you try to keep private. For instance, your periods. Harry's not dumb and obviously knows you get a period. Mainly from seeing your sanitary products under the bathroom sink or in the bin by the toilet. You don't try to keep your periods a secret, just private.
And though Harry knows you get periods, as do most females, he has yet to see the bad side of your periods. The periods that make you sob on the bathroom floor from the amount of pain your cramps are causing. The periods that make you nausous and throw up. Luckily those periods aren't a monthly thing but they do happen a few times a year for whatever reason and it sucks.
--------------------------
Late last night as you and Harry were watching a movie on his sofa, you began to feel crampy in your lower stomach. You asked if he could pause the film while you went to the bathroom down the hall and he agreed. And that's when you realized your period had came and you'd leaked. It's not a bad leak but it's enough for you to need to change your underwear and your shorts. Which the shorts barely had any blood on them but still called for a fresh pair.
Once you got yourself situated, you returned to the living room where the first thing Harry commented on is your changed clothes. "Did you change your shorts or somethin'?"
Quickly, you answered, "Yeah, my period started and I kinda leaked. Okay, you can press play on the movie."
Harry nodded sympathetically but followed your orders. He would have said something else to try and comfort you but knew you prefered to keep your periods more private. He doesn't understand why though. All women get periods. It's not something you should be ashamed of and he wished you'd understand that.
Now it's four in the morning and you're woken up to what feels like the worst period cramps of your whole life. Fuck, you scream in your head, it's gonna be one of those months. The longer you lay in bed the more nausous you began to feel from how painful your cramps are and that leads to you stumbling out of bed and rushing to the bathroom down the hall.
After what felt like an eternity, you made it to the bathroom and literally crawled on the floor over to the toilet. Now that you're in the bathroom you feel less nauseous but the pain is still in full force. That's when the tears start flowing. With your back against the wall and your knees up to your chest, sobs roll out your body as you fight against the waves of your uterus contracting to release its lining.
Harry is a heavy sleeper and usually don't wake up unless someone outwardly calls his name or pushes him awake. What wakes him up right now though is a dry mouth and a craving for a glass of water. So he gets out of bed and heads to the kitchen. But before he can even make it to the kitchen, he hears what sounds like crying coming from the hall bathroom.
Rushing over to the bathroom door, the sight before him breaks his heart. You didn't have the strength to shut the door so from the hall, Harry sees you sobbing in front of the toilet, back against the wall, and a hand clutching your stomach. "Oh, Y/n," he steps inside, "what's the matter?"
You slowly lift your head and the first thought in your mind was you didn't want him to see you like this. This was too embarrassing and you were too vulnerable at the moment. "Harry, go. Don't look at me."
Taken back by your words, Harry retorts in concern, "Not until you tell me what's wrong. Are you sick? Why're cryin'?"
Realising it's no use to deny your housemates help in your condition, you answer through the pain and tears, "My.....my cramps are SO bad. It hurts so much, H...Harry. *sob* It's making me feel so sick."
Harry frowns sympathetically and kneels down beside you in just his boxer briefs, which is his usual sleep attire. He would have covered up a bit more if he'd known this is what he was going to be walking into on his trip for a glass of water. As soon as he kneels down, you get the real urge to puke.
You push yourself off the wall and hang your head over the toilet. A harsh dry heave leaves your mouth that makes him cringe but nothing more, yet. Harry quickly scoots behind you and collects your hair with one hand and runs his other hand over your back. He doesn't know if you want to be touched right now but knows that when he's getting sick he finds that if someone rubs on his back it makes him feel a little better.
"Shhh," Harry whispers gently, "it's okay. You're okay. I've got you." He patiently waits until your feel better or actually get sick. After a few more jarring dry heaves, you end up throwing up in the toilet. And though the act feels like hell and is gross, you hope it will also relive the sickness your belly feels due to your period cramps.
You slowly lift your head up, taking deep breaths, and start crying again. This time not from the pain but from embarrassment. Harry's quick to ask, "Hey, what is it, Y/n? The cramps again?"
A little more coherently then the last time you spoke, you answer, "No. Just embarrassed. I threw up in front of you." That has Harry throwing his head back with a laugh.
"Y/n, I don't give a single fuck about you throwing up in front of me. Everyone gets sick from time to time. Just want to make sure you're alright. I hate that your period cramps are causin' you so much pain."
While subconsciously rubbing circles in your lower tummy, you ask desperately in a near whispered voice, "H, can you please go get me some pain medicine. It's in my bedside table drawer in my bedroom. Once I have that I think I'll feel better. At least for a couple of hours."
"Of course." Harry agrees and gets up off the bathroom floor to head to your bedroom. Once inside, he walks straight to your bedside table and opens the drawer to find your bottle of pain medication. While rummaging through to find the bottle, Harry tries to ignore the assortment of sex toys you have in there; bullet vibrator, dildo, clit sucker. Shit, this is the wrong time for him to get all hot and flustered at the thought of you using those under his roof.
He finally finds the bottle of pills and heads back to the bathroom where you still are. Within the time it took him to grab your medicine, you've stood up off the floor, flushed the toilet of course, and now sit on a closed toilet seat. Harry opens the bottle and asks, "How many? One or Two or....?"
"Two please." Harry hands you two tablets and grabs a paper cup used for rinsing your mouths out by the sink and fills it up with tap water. You carefully grab the small cup from his hands and take the pills with urgency, just wanting to be out of pain as soon as possible.
Once that's over with, Harry annonces, "Well, I'll let you get cleaned up in here and I'll be out there waiting for you."
"Okay, thank you." you respond gratefully. Harry really is the best housemate you could have asked for. While he's gone, you change out your tampon and brush the taste of vomit from your mouth. Then you exit the hall bathroom, ready to try and get a few more hours of sleep.
As you step inside your bedroom, you're taken back. Harry has managed to change your sheets and duvet, claiming a fresh pair will help you relax and hopefully sleep better. He's also set an actual glass of water on your nightstand, as well as plugged in his heating pad for you to use. "Harry....... what's all this?"
Nervously, because he doesn't know if this is all too much to do to someone who is just his housemate and friend, Harry replies, "Um, just wanted to make sure you come back to a comfy room. Hopefully you'll get a few more hours of sleep. And if you get thirsty or need to take more medicine, there's a glass of water there. Then my old heating pad that you can use across your tummy to also help with your cramps. Hope it's not too much."
You turn around with a small smile on your face and reach out to hug him. He's startled at first but soon relaxes and hugs you back. You hug for a minute before you break away first and mutter your appreciation. "No, this is great, Harry. Not too much at all. Thank you for your kindness tonight. And thank you for putting up with me in the bathroom. I know that wasn't a pretty sight. So yeah, just, thank you so much."
Looking down at you, Harry gets the urge to kiss you, but instead, says, "Y/n, it's no big deal, really. I would have helped anyone in that situation. Just want you to feel better s'all. Now get back into bed and around ten I'll wake up and make us a brunch. Sound good?"
"Yeah, sounds perfect." You crawl back into your bed that now has fresh sheets and maneuver the heating pad over your tummy. The pain medicine has begun to work but your uterus is still quite achy. As Harry turns around and heads out your door, you yell out, "Night." even though it's five in the morning by now.
"Night, Y/n." Harry speaks as well before slipping back into his bed across the hall. Now laying in your separate beds, all you can think about is how much you would have loved if Harry was in your bed cuddling you. And all Harry can think about is how much he wishes you were in his bed, so he could cuddle you. Maybe one day that day will come. But for now, you're just silly housemates that's turned into friends.
(PLEASE REBLOG BECAUSE WRITING IS NOT EASY AND IT'S FREE SO JUST DO IT)
(no more tags are allowed because i've hit my number limit. sorry : ( )
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My Masterlist Masterpost
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leidensygdom · 17 days
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AI bros from hell
Hello! Do you have a bit of your time for a story on AI bros and clients from hell? I bring a really fun one!
I met this guy at a con I was tabling at over a year ago, before AI was a thing. He said he enjoyed my art, and inquired me about whether I did book illustrations. I said yes- He was specifically interested in my bigger pieces, the fully rendered and detailed ones. He agreed to send me later a DM to discuss specifics.
For two weeks, he kept DMing me on details about his book, what he wanted, etc. He wanted full illustrations for inside the book as well as a cover, all of them fully colored, painted and rendered. He also wanted illustrations in this style to post on social media to promote the book. I had warned him that something like that would be costly, but he insisted that he needed this to be the best of the best.
Now, I was getting bad vibes from the guy. I shit y'all not, his instagram handle was "The next tolkien". I wasn't however gonna refuse a job opportunity. Now, he finally asked for prices: He had reassured me he was willing to pay fairly for this. Since he's a starting author, I gave him my non-commercial quotes, which are much, much, much lower than the standard for book illustrations. I mean "if you search for how much this costs on google, the lower prices are x5 times more expensive than what I offered".
The guy, upon receiving that, just ghosted me. Immediately unfollowed, didn't reply me with a "sorry, I can't afford it" or "sorry, i was expecting to pay $10 for a full rendered full background several-characters-picture". Nothing.
The other day I decided to search what he was up to. He's now released... THREE books for this series. There's a single review in the first one. Not even written, just a stars one. Also, notably, he had a webpage put together promoting the book, and. Yeah.
All the art is AI crap.
Which makes sense. My guy was very on his high horse about how fantastic of a writer he is, but I guess art isn't really to be compensated fairly. When he saw the "art stealing machine you just pay a subscription for", I'm guessing he was very excited.
So, uh, here's some of the marvelous pictures he generated of the characters, which surely tell you about how great the book is. AI is theft, so I don't give a f*** about reposting it.
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I have a lot of opinions about creators who write, draw or make music, who are more than happy to use AI for other stuff- Album covers made with AI, writers using AI crap for book illustrations, artists using AI-made music. It feels like you're sh*tting in any other artistic field and showing how little you respect anyone but yourself. Like, I'll be honest, I don't have interest reading a book from someone who considers that other forms of art aren't real or worth any money. It just tells me you're devoid of any interest for art or humanity.
As an ending note, his instagram description is "More closer to god than to human", which does add to the clownery.
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Hi hi. I’m not sure if you do request like this and this isn’t detailed or anything so I get if you don’t want to but like could I request something smut chishiya? Maybe him and reader are friends and get into an argument about their feelings for each other and they end up having really romantic love making and confess to each other or something. Probably makes like zero sense sorry.
i do requests like this, yes! just bear with me because i am not the most skilled smut writer but i am absolutely open to writing it, ask away! and it makes perfect sense, don't worry! also, i assumed you wanted fem!bodied reader but since you didn't specify, i didn't. so hopefully i think everyone can read. this is so fucking long i'm sorry. was it good? i don't think so, no. is it the best i could do? absolutely. enjoy!
ok, content warning/this fic contains: sexy times, non descriptive penetrative sex as a way to keep this as inclusive as possible, no body descriptions for reader, unprotected sex (not good! don't do this!), chishiya being vulnerable (or, as the kids call it, a bit subby), a smidge of angst at the beginning, probably kind of shitty aftercare bc i don't know how and i'm going off of vibes. absolutely not proofread so most likely grammar mistakes.
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT WITH THIS POST OR I'LL CALL YOUR MOM!!!
"What do you mean? I'm being careless by talking to people?", you exclaimed. Chishiya was being more and more unreasonable lately. You knew he thought you were gullible and naive, and you suspected that's why he decided to get closer to you; who'd suspect you, after all? You weren't all that wide eyed ingenue, you just believed that people could still be good in this world. Kuina shared the same belief, and he wasn't nagging on her like he did with you.
"Of course you can! But not so much to make yourself vulnerable to threats! What are you doing, cozying up to someone you don't even know during a game?", his tone raised the slightest bit, what was already a lot for Chishiya. He may have been acting unreasonably but he knew what he was saying had reason. Chishiya had feelings for you, and once he got to know you the desire to protect you only grew. He knew that you were selfless to the point of bordering stupidity, and would sacrifice yourself for someone. What made Chishiya's heart clench even more is that you'd sacrifice for him given the chance. Without even thinking. The flame of his anger was fanned at the thought that someone may have used your good will to trick you into dying in their place if he wasn't around.
"I wasn't cozying up! I was talking to a teammate! On a game of clubs! You know, one of those we depend on other people to live?", you said, exasperated. You took a calming breath and sighed. "You know what, think what you want of me. I'm tired, I don't want to fight", you started to pace around, something you often did to release anxious energy after a game.
"We're not fighting. We're having a conversation", Chishiya deadpanned, raising his eyebrows when you turned to look at him.
"A conversation of you laying it thick the implication that I'm some dumb thing with stars in my eyes? That I can let anyone trick me into sacrifice?", you said, and his eyes darted across the room, avoiding your eyes. Red-handed. "Chishiya, listen to me", you sat besides him, taking his hand in yours. "I may still be a bit too hopeful of people sometimes. Everyone copes in their own way, right?", you earned yourself a dry chuckle. "But I am hopeful because of what I've seen. Yeah, there's death and sadness and betrayal but there's good things. Friendship and love. For every bad person there's a few good ones, I truly believe that. And don't worry about me. You and Kuina drilled in my brain to be street smart", you smiled. Now it was your turn to avoid his eyes. "The only person in this entire world that can trick me is you, Chishiya. I trust you wholeheartedly", you whispered, clenching his hand in yours tight but still refusing to turn your warm face towards his. He was your lifeline but made you mortified at the same time.
"I don't think you're dumb. I'm sorry if I came across that way. I wouldn't have made an ally out of you if I didn't trust your abilities. And... I wouldn't made a friend out of you if I thought you're stupid. I just didn't want to lose you, that's all", he said. "I trust you too. Wholeheartedly", he said, giving you one of his Monalisa smiles. Sutil enough he may not even be smiling at all.
"Not in the way I trust you. Not by far", you said, finally managing to gather yourself enough to look at him. You may die at any point, Chishiya was kind enough to remind you. So what if he didn't love you back? You had the right to say it and he had the right to know. Even if he scolded you for wearing your heart on your sleeve. Even if he betrayed you.
"Why do you say that?", he asked, frowning. Did you know believe him? After all this time, he thought he was opening up to you. That you saw something more inside of him, the optimism, the sliver of hope he kept hidden for emergencies and you.
"Because I love you. And I trust you. Blindly", you said after being in silence for a while, and the atmosphere of the room shifted. You could feel the hairs in your body standing in attention, the room felt colder, the air felt heavy and sticky when you breathed in and you thought that if you took a deep breath like you've been dying to, you'd choke. You could hear a pin drop. And Chishiya was still as a statue.
It happened in a blink of an eye. Chishiya was tense, his lips pressed against yours and shoulders almost up to his ears, like someone had pushed him into you and he was still trying to process it. You had your eyes wide open, looking around the room, hands up like someone was pointing a gun at you, not knowing where to place them. For a few seconds it was like this, until something clicked. Chishiya kissed you. Chishiya was kissing you. You parted for a second before looking into each other's eyes, bewildered like you had been possessed. And then you kissed him.
This was much more like an actual kiss. It was soft, slow, steady. You cupped his face between your hands and got up on your knees to get closer to him, his hands snaking their way up to your waist. Soon enough, you had to breathe, breaking apart just enough for your mouths to disconnect but staying close. Neither of you thought you could let each other go after what you knew it was about to transpire.
"Chishiya... I...", you were breathless, you brain had turned to mush and you couldn't speak, and Chishiya took the opportunity to kiss you yet again.
You could've been kissing for ages. The games might've been over, everyone dead, the land completely taken over by vegetation at this point. But you were still kissing Chishiya, slow and deep, melting and molding into his arms, straddling his lap. Not letting your hands leave him not for a second, as he did with you. Your hands were on his face, his on your waist. His hands moved up your back, yours into his hair. Your hands on his chest, his in yours.
The kisses started growing hot and sloppy. You needed each other bad. So when Chishiya pulled apart to catch his breath and you couldn't stay away from him, you started to kiss down his neck, hands pulling off his hoodie off like it was offending you, desperately mouthing at the parts of his collarbones and chest not covered by his shirt. And the sounds were driving you insane. The little sighs and moans made you want to beg him to fuck you already but you decided to contain yourself. You wanted him to feel appreciated. Loved.
"Ah... That's good", he whispered, and when you parted from his neck to see his head thrown back, his mouth slightly opened, eyes half lidded like he was intoxicated, you couldn't help but to slip your tongue into his mouth yet again, shifting your hips against his slightly, making you both moan in each other's mouths. "Can I undress you?", he asked between pecks on your lips, and you nodded so hard you made yourself dizzy. "No, no. I need to hear you say it", he said, stopping to look at you looking at him. How you were still bashful at a situation like this he couldn't figure out for the life of him, but he gave you a low chuckle when you hid your face in his neck, only to shiver after feeling your teeth pressed against his pulse point. If the room wasn't so quiet he wouldn't be able to hear the small "Please, Chishiya, undress me" that followed.
His hands were fast as they were precise and in no time you were fully naked in his lap, kissing him like your life depended on it. Your hands made your way down his chest, getting to the hem and making their way up again, now under the fabric, lifting it up and off of his torso, breaking the kiss just long enough to pull it over his head.
You proceeded to kiss every newly discovered inch of his warm skin. From his fingertips, up his arms, his shoulders, nipping and sucking and licking down his chest, over his sensitive nipples, down his stomach and the soft trail of hair that dissapeared under the waistband of his pants.
"Y/N...", he sighed, hand coming up under your chin to pull you off of obsessively mouthing him over his pants. "Y/N...", he sighed yet again when you came up, making eye contact with him and giving him a peck on the lips.
"Can I finish undressing you, Chishiya? Please?", you were desperate, and Chishiya hissed at the thought of what was to come. How could he hold back when you were so sweet, so beautiful, so eager, looking at him like he painted the sky midnight blue and hung the moon and stars up there?
"Yes. Yes, please", he breathed. You touched your forehead to his, fiddling with the ties of his loose pants. Meanwhile, he pressed two of his fingers to your lips, slowly but surely shoving them inside your warm and wet mouth. As you sucked them, you started to pull his pants and underwear down his slim hips, and he lifted his hips to aid you.
Soon enough, you were both naked, you straddling his thighs. There was nothing in between you anymore. He took his fingers off of your mouth as you looked down to take him in, all the parts hidden that you'd been fantasizing about. His chest with a bit of hair, now covered in red splotches from your sucking, his stomach and happy trail covered in love bites, his pale hairy legs, his cock that now slapped against his stomach, not too long but just enough to make your mouth water, with a leaking pink tip, girthy and veiny, nestled in his pubes, his balls hanging low, filled with cum.
"Chishiya, you're so beautiful", you moaned in pure agony. His body, the way he was looking up at you so reverently; he looked like an angel. He wasted no time in using his fingers lubed by your spit to start prepping you, carefully but firmly shoving them inside of you, finger fucking you in efforts to find that sweet spot inside of you.
"You're beautiful too. Ah, that's it, take my fingers inside you", he moaned as you started to move your hips in tandem with his hand. You slowly started to play with his balls, earning yourself a low groan.
"Chishiya. Chishiya", you moaned, convulsing when he managed to graze what he was looking for. "I'm going to- ah! Kiss me, please", he placed his hand in the back of your neck and pulled you to him, his tongue messily meeting yours while you mewled into his mouth and you shivered from your orgasm.
You only parted after you finished riding out your orgasm, after your lungs were burning, and you felt weak and feverish. You looked into his eyes for a little while and Chishiya opened his mouth to speak, only to come up with nothing but shallow gasps and a smile. His heart jumped when you smiled back.
"Chishiya, make love to me, please", he'd think you were in pain if it wasn't your smile. The way you were looking at him.
"Of course", he said, laying you down on the floor on your back, parting your knees, taking a moment to just look at you, making you feel shy. "You're so gorgeous. Are you ready for me?", he asked.
"Yes!", you moaned. You couldn't believe this was happening. Not in the Borderlands of all places.
Slowly, he started to put it inside of you, and the stretch of him was amazing. You blindly reached for one of his hands that was bracketing your head, him holding the back of it to his lips for a second before continuing.
"Almost there. Are you ok? Fuck. Does it hurt?", he said. He wanted nothing more than to fuck you into the floor but he wanted to be gentle with you. Wanted to see you fall apart slowly for him.
"Ah... You're amazing. It feels amazing", you sighed, dreamily; you never felt so full in your entire life, it was an all encompassing feeling, you couldn't do anything but to lay there and feel him inside you. Your eyes meeting his with another dazzling smile, and he almost came on the spot.
"Ah, ah!", he bottomed out inside of you and he couldn't believe how warm and wet you were. "So good...", he started to grind his hips into yours, not really pulling out. He couldn't pull away from you right now, not when you felt so good.
The both of you were in a frenzy, hips grinding into each other desperately, the both of you sweaty and moaning. One of you hands was tightly clasped in one of Chishiya's, the other with their nails deep into the skin of his shoulder, the other hand of Chishiya was gripping your tigh, his arm wrapped around it. Your mouth was open in ecstacy, moaning like an animal in heat. Chishiya didn't know where to place his mouth. Dragging across yours, on your neck, your shoulders, your collarbones, down your chest.
"Chishiya, Chishiya, Chishiya", you wanted to let him know you were about to cum, but your mind was numb and the only thing you could say was his name over and over.
"Are you close?", he breathed out and you nodded feverishly. "Me too. Will you cum with me?", he moaned and it was the most beautiful sound you heard in your life. You didn't stand a chance, clenching around him with a desperate cry of his name while he pressed his hips to yours, pumping you full of his cum.
It felt like you both were locked together, standing still against each other like a statue for ages. You didn't know how long until your soul returned to your body but when it did, you knew yours and his were intertwined. "Hi", you breathed, and he smiled. Not a quirk of his lips, a full fledged smile, teeth and all. "I should clean you up", he said, using his shirt to clean the cum seeping out of you, being mindful of how sensitive you were. "Hurts?", he asked. "No, I'm fine", you said. After dressing you and himself, discarding the shirt and zipping his hoodie with nothing underneath, he held you to his chest.
"I believe there's good in this world too", he said.
"Hm?", you asked, sleepy, your cheek pressed against his chest, with his arms around you.
"I believe there's good in the world too. Maybe less than you but I do. Believe that there's good out there. I'll go back with you, if we get lost I'll find you. And then I'll make love to you again, and hold you close, to remember that there's good in the real world too", he said. "I love you too", he said, squeezing you to him.
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maniculum · 3 months
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scorpion in the 'buch der natur' by konrad von megenberg, alsace, c. 1440 (Stuttgart, Landesbibl., Cod. med. et phys. 2° 14, fol. 243v). interesting detail: the german text starts with the typical description of the scorpion as a snake with a pretty woman's face. over this passage, somebody added in latin: "non est ita" = "it's not like that". lmaoo. a paradigm shift. to ME
[Image ID: an arthropod with some odd tripartite mouthparts, a sort of neck raising its head from a beetle-like body, eight legs that end in pincers, a row of nodules along its back, and a fishhook-like tail. It is shown in an outdoor scene that makes it look gigantic.]
(Sorry for the delay on this. I've had deadlines keeping me busy, but they're done now and I'm trying to catch up on various things that fell by the wayside.)
Some remarkable stuff here. I absolutely love someone writing "it's not like that" over the description, and I really have to wonder (not that an answer is likely forthcoming) about the context. On one hand, the idea that someone is just straight-up (correctly) disputing the claim that a scorpion is a serpent with a woman's face is pretty funny. On the other hand, I also like the idea that this comment is meant to be juxtaposed with the illustration: "hey, I'm not sure if you've noticed, but the giant rampaging monster you've drawn here does not have a woman's face. it's not like that."
Also, I know the scale is often not meant to be representative in these illustrations, but wow that's a big scorpion. We're back to prehistoric vibes, but this time our scorpion looks more like an actual dinosaur than any other thing I can think of. I suppose that's just my only referent for an armored creature of that size. It looks like it's a serious challenge for 4-6 mid-level adventurers.
No idea what's going on with those mouthparts, also. They need to be acknowledged, but I don't know what to say about them.
Anyway, points:
Small Scuttling Beaſtie? ½, definitely looks like it scuttles but is not small in the least
Pincers? eight on the ends of its legs rather than as a separate pair of limbs, but sure, ✓
Exoskeleton or Shell? ✓
Visible Stinger? ✓
Limbs? 8
As for vibes, I am enjoying this one. I don't want it to be near me, but it has a certain majesty when observed from a distance. Like this:
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Yeah, we're still on the dinosaur comparison. 4 / 5.
And that means that this is officially the Best Scorpion So Far, coming in at a total score of:
8.3 / 10
Our bestiary illustrator was so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should. (They absolutely should.)
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ash5monster01 · 9 months
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Speak Now
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pairing: Steve Harrington x FemReader
warnings: fluff, language, mentions of heart ache, mentions of past trauma, angst.
summary: based off the song Speak Now by Taylor Swift, in honor of Taylor’s version dropping today. Listening to it today I thought of this and I just couldn’t help myself. I rushed and the writing is sloppy, but it’s still cute 💜 I just had to do it to celebrate. For a very basic description the reader crashes Steve’s wedding, enjoy xx
word count: 2,080
Masterlist
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7/7/89
It had been three years since you had received a letter from him. Three years almost exactly. Three years since he gave up writing because you never wrote back. Yet this time the letter was in a purple envelope, sealed with a gold wax stamp, and cursive writing in dainty loops across the corner. Not the normal chicken scratch you were used too. Yet there it was, your name scribbled in a rush, center of the envelope. Heart hammering in your chest you opened to see what you absolutely dreaded.
Save The Date!
Tears burned at the back of your eyes but you knew you couldn’t let them fall. Crying would be useless now. You did it to yourself and now you had to deal with the consequences. Running away from Hawkins all those years ago meant running away from him too, but now maybe it was for the best. You could go back, attend the wedding, and show him you had moved on, prove to yourself you had moved on. Yet you were lying to yourself, you knew that wasn't your motive when you taped the invite to your fridge and called work to ask off.
So here you were, driving back to a town you promised yourself you'd never go back to on this extremely hot and sunny day. The purple dress wrapped in plastic laying across the passenger seat. Robin shocked she had recieved a call from you saying you'd needed somewhere to stay for the wedding, mainly because she didn't even know they invited you. She didn't hesitate to say yes though, she had missed you, and even if it was for a day she would take it. So she planned to get ready and let you do her makeup just because it had been so long. She knew not to mention the wedding as you applied eyeshadow to her eyes, curlers wrapped in your hair.
"I'm glad you're here" she tould you fondly, fingers playing with a stray makeup brush. "It's been a really long time"
"Yeah, three years" you muttered, focused on blending the pinks across her eyes.
"I'm glad you came" she told you again, trying to reinforce how much it meant to her and everyone that you were here.
"I'm surprised you’re wearing makeup for this" you told her, trying to stray from the obvious conversation you didn't want to have.
"Not really my choice, Steve wanted me up there in a tux on his side but she told me it was too tacky, that if he needed me in the wedding so bad I could stand up there in a bridesmaid dress" you couldn’t help the roll of your eyes as Robin told you this, clearly not comfortable with the fancy hair, makeup, dress, any of it.
"You can wear a tux at my wedding Rob, and I'd happily wear one to yours" you told her and she smiled brightly, missing you in a way she couldn't even explain. You should be the one marrying Steve and even she knew it. So she caught you up on her life, not leaving out a single detail because maybe if you knew everything you wouldn't leave this time.
Walking up to the church was when you finally addmitted to yourself why you were here. You’re not the kind of girl who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion, but he was not the kind of boy who should be marrying the wrong girl. So despite how everything ended all those years ago you knew you had to do something whether you were stopping the wedding for yourself or him, you weren't quite sure yet.
"You go ahead, I'm gonna get some fresh air" You told Robin, her bridesmaid dress a gorgeous pastel color. You were jealous she was in the wedding, standing on the side of his future wife but you knew she was up there for him, not her.
"I'll see you after" Robin set a comforting hand on your shoulder and you nodded, half tempted to light a cigarette despite not smoking one since high school. Yet before you could ask to bum one you found yourself sneaking through the back door, the bustling of the busy wedding party surrounding you. The boys stood in matching tuxes, now so much more grown in the last three years, and girls you had never seen before in matching pastels to Robin whispered in a corner. Unrecognizable family wearing pastels to match rushed around as well, quickly you walked by as if to go unnoticed. That's when you heard the shrill voice, your head peering into a room to see blonde hair curled perfectly laying a top a dress shaped like a pastry as she yelled at a briesmaid. This was not what you had thought it'd be, not what you both had imagined for your own wedding. Knowing Steve never planned something like this.
"Only a few people, none of my family if I can help it, and screw the stuffy church we should get married in a big field with a ton of wildflowers. Hell we should even ask Hopper to marry us, just our friends and the kids. There is no need to make such a big show of your love unless you're trying to prove something, and what do we have to prove?"
"Absolutely nothing, we're as real as it gets"

Those words burned in the back of your mind. The terrible truth that this wedding was him trying to prove something, maybe that's why you had recieved an invite with your name written in such a rush. Maybe it was a cry for help, or maybe you were delusional. No matter what the fantasy of standing and saying 'Don't say yes, run away now, I'll meet you when you're out of the church at the back door. Don't wait, or say a single vow. You need to hear me out' stamped permanently in your brain. Realizing the wedding was about to start you snuck back out, at least before you caught sight of him. Spotting Nancy and Johnathon in a pew, shocked faces painted on as you approached them, you slipped into the seat beside them.
"Y/N what're you doing here?" Nancy asked, moving her purse to make more room for you.
"I was invited" you told her, knowing she wasn't upset just confused.
"No you weren't, I helped send the invites" your heart tripled in speed as she informed you of this, the confirmation that Steve had invited you last minute without saying a word to anyone. A cry for help. You watched people speak fondly to eachother as the organ began to play, the song way to similar to a death march. Seeing the faces around you, the clear shock proved you were not invited by the bride to be, that you were out of place in your bright purple dress, the color of the wildflowers you imagined him marrying you in. Thats when you saw him standing at the alter, big fluffly hair, sleek black tux, and bright eyes. His eyes scanning the crowd.
Then right before they landed on you the bride appeared in the aisle, everyone standing because the wedding had now officially started, her looking like a pageant queen. But you knew he wished it was you, you looked back at him trying to read his thoughts. He would only send an invite if it truly meant he wished it was you and he wanted you to save him. The daydream came to mind again, the hope of meeting at the back door and rushing to find a field of wildflowers fit for you to remember your great love. As the wedding progressed Nancy noticed you bouncing your leg and she shot a worried glance to Johnathon. It may have been three years but she still knew you, knew that you were about to do something so crazy you had to bounce your leg to ease the nerves.
"Speak now or forever hold your peace" The preacher fianlly said and there's the silence, there's you last chance. So you stand up with shaky hands, all eyes on you, horrified looks from everyone in the room, but you're only looking at him. Steve.
Eyes scanned the room, waiting to see what happened next as the bride wore an offended look. Nancy hid her face against Johnathon, unsure what to do as Robin wore a grin bigger than the entire wedding itself. People in the pews whispered, the kids standing beside Steve hitting each other, not realizing you were here until now. Yet you never removed your eyes from his as you waited to see if what you had just did is what he had wanted. That he invited you because he wanted to not say yes, run away now, meet you when you're out of the church at the back door. To not wait, or say a single vow because your time is running out.
Your not the kind of girl who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion, but you are not the kind of boy who should be marrying the wrong girl, so here you were standing now when the preacher says speak now.
"What do you have to prove Steve?" you watched as his jaw clenched slightly and then he was dropping her hands, a gasp eliciting from the action yet you couldn't help the smile that appeard on your face.
"Absolutley nothing" and then looking like a dream in that tux he floated down the alter, meeting you in the aisle and rushing out the door. The hum of whispers and shocked gaps filled the church as you disappeared into the entryway, your hands locked together, grins etched across your faces as you let out heavy breaths of air.
"Let's run away now, I'll meet you when I'm out of my tux at the back door. Baby, I didn't say my vows, so glad you were around when they said, speak now" you nodded quickly, adrenaline, excitment, and love flowing through your veins. Steve grinned, hands gripping your face as he pressed a hard and quick kiss to your lips before rushing to the back room of the church where he had left his clothes.
You wasted no time getting to the backdoor, your foot bouncing as you spotted his BMW in the parking spot. The door pushed open and there was the Steve you were used to, the one that wore tight jeans and soft sweaters. He flashed you a smile as he locked hands with you again and you were sprinting to his car, laughs falling from your lips. He shut you in as fast as he could before rushing around the side of the vehicle and turning the engine to life. He peeled out so fast dirt flew up in the air but you both knew that you had already started and there was no point in stopping now.
"You came?" he smiled, hand locking with your own again.
"I did, turns out I wasn't supposed to be invited" you smiled at him and he chuckled.
"I thought I could do it, forget all about you, and do the big white wedding. Then I kept thinking about the field of wild flowers, free of my family and full of the people who actually do love me, and when I thought of that I thought of you" pulling his hand up you pressed a soft kiss to his knuckles, unbelieving that you were in Steve Harrington’s front seat again.
"I wasn't going to come but then I thought of how lonely the last three years have been and some part of me knew it was a cry for help, so I came to try one last time" you honestly told him and he smiled from his seat, continuing to drive towards where he hoped to be by the end of the day.
Looking up you saw he approached a field, just outside of Hawkins, and purple wild flowers waved in the wind, bathed by the sunlight. You realized it was exactly like the wedding you both had imagined. “I planted them a few months ago, I was going to suggest it but I realized I couldn’t share them with anyone but you”
“I love it Steve”
“Just don’t leave again”
“How could I? I just crashed your wedding!”
212 notes · View notes
mycheersricochet · 6 months
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All Reason Aside
Tumblr media
description: Things are heating up between Tyler and a silent enemy.
warnings: fight, jealousy, cliffhanger
note: my favorite chapter because there's SO much drama. I had so much fun writing it in the moment (and funny enough editing it too)
word count: 4.8k
Previous | Playlist | Masterlist
Hey, I'm free this weekend to work on the project.
Cool. How about tomorrow morning?
Tyler groaned next to me as he turned onto his side and saw me sitting up in bed. It was past midnight and we were both tired from working all week. I took a few extra shifts at the restaurant and he had some late nights dealing with some business. 
We still didn't know who attacked him a few weeks ago. So I still worried for him when he was out but after a few deep talks with him, we came to the understanding that he'd tell me as much as he could. 
For now, we just lived our life and I was spending more time with him at his place. He squinted his eyes sleepily at me as I smiled at him. 
"What are you still doing up?" He asked.
"Texting a friend. Plans for a school project."
"It's Friday night," he complained.
"Actually it's now Saturday. You fell asleep after our second sesh," I winked at him. "It's been crazy with our schedules but we finally got time to work on it."
He slid closer, nestling his head onto my side. 
"Tell em' to text you in the morning."
"We're meeting in the morning," I touched his head, caressing his hair as I stared at my phone.
"I thought we were doing a brunch thing with Skye at the restaurant." He asked, tilting his head up.
"We can do it another day."
"That sucks. I love brunch," he deadpans, making me hold in a laugh.
Sorry babes gotta cancel brunch. Gonna work on my project tomorrow.
Noooooooo 😭😭
"Tyler," I giggled as he slid his hand under the side of my spaghetti shirt. He knew it tickled me. "Stop," I told him, laughing again. "Go back to sleep, I'm just gonna sort out a few details."
"I'm not tired." The yawn he let out right after betrayed him.
"Sure sleepy head," I glanced down at him amused. "But seriously go to sleep. I want you to be alert and awake when you're out."
He gave me a closed smile and sighed. "I'll take a nap while you're studying. How early are we going?"
"I don't know yet. I'm waiting on confirmation and you're not going."
"Why?" He whined.
"Because you distract me." My phone vibrated and I checked to see if Jack responded.
Can't believe you're ditching me for your boy toy.
I rolled my eyes at Skye's text.
Shut up. We're going to work on our project. And I'm in bed with Tyler right now!
"Well you can keep talking to your friend. I'll be busy down here," he smirked, going under the sheet where I was only wearing my panties. "Distracting you."
"Tyler!" I laughed again.
Oops well, careful with Jack anyway. Have a feeling he wants you in a whole other way.
I rolled my eyes. Jack knew I had a boyfriend and never again said anything flirty to me again. Plus he was a bit of a player from the stories he's told me. Jack's probably out partying now which is why he's taking so long to answer. And Tyler really fucking knows what he's doing "distracting me" so he better respond quick.
Meet you at the library at 10 🖤🖤🖤
The next day Jack and I worked on our project at the library. We worked well together and we're halfway done when I realized I forgot something important.
"Oh no."
"What is it?" Jack looked up from his laptop.
"I left my notebook with all my notes at my job," I groaned.
"It's alright. We can go get them and come back or go to my place. It's closer to the restaurant than the library."
"You sure?"
Jack chuckled and closed his laptop, "Yeah, no worries."
"Alright let's go," I dumped my stuff back in my bag and picked up my laptop.
We made it there in twenty minutes and Jack idled in the car while I went inside.
"I'll be right back." He smiled and nodded. I quickly made my way in to pick up my notebook.
"Oh hey," Skye greeted me on her way out of the restroom. "What are you doing here? I thought you were studying with Jack."
"I left my notebook here," I sighed, going to the back where we left our things while we worked.
"Ah. Tyler is here by the way. If you want to stop and say hi."
"He is?" I brightened up immediately. "Jack is waiting for me in the car so I have to be quick."
"The boy toy and your lover in the same place," she joked.
"No," I hit her back lightly. "Oh my god don't let Tyler hear you say that. You know Jack is just a friend."
"Yeah but if Tyler hadn't appeared before Jack who knows what could have been," she laughed as I rolled my eyes.
I followed her out and found Tyler at a rowdy table with the lads. I lifted a finger to shush the guys who saw me and placed my hands over his eyes.
He reached up his hands to uncover his eyes and I leaned over him, hugging his neck. 
"Hey."
"Hey," Tyler tilted his head back to grin up at me, dimples showing. "I thought you were at school. Why didn't you call me to pick you up?"
"My friend brought me. I'm just here to pick up my notebook but I gotta go," I kissed his cheek. 
"I'll walk you out," he said and the guys teased him as he put his arm over my shoulders as he walked me out of the restaurant.
We crossed paths with Danhausen on the way. He looked a bit troubled as he stopped in front of us.
"YN, can I talk to you? I need to tell you something."
"Uh, yeah sure," I smiled and turned to kiss Tyler quickly. "I'll see you later."
He grinned, knowing we had plans for later at my place and went back to his table. Giving a bump to Dan as he passed him.
"What do you need, Dan?" I turned to him. "I have to go, my friend is waiting in the car."
"Jack Perry?"
"Uh yeah, he's my study partner. You guys know each other?" What a small world, I thought to myself.
"Unfortunately," he said. "YN you need to stay away from him," he warned.
"What?" I furrow my brow. "Why?"
"Just trust me. Hook can not know you're hanging out with Jack."
I tilted my head in thought. 
"Tyler, knows Jack?" 
"Long story short," Dan gave me a pointed look. "They hate each other."
"Wait, how do they even know each other?" 
At one point I wondered if they would get along because they were into some of the same things but Jack was a party boy and Tyler the most chill guy ever.
The way Dan looked at me told me there was a whole story here that I didn't have time to hear. I just wanted to finish this project and be done with summer school. Why did my life have to be so complicated?
"It's a long story but please listen to me," he pleaded with his eyes too and damn I had a soft spot for him. Danhausen could do no wrong so I nodded.
"Okay, but I need to finish this project with Jack today. We're in the same class and I really need to pass it to take my classes this semester."
Dan sighed. 
"Fine but if anything happens and YN, I mean anything. Call me, I'll be here with Hook. And–" he reached for Skye's hand as she passed by, startling her. "Take Skye with you. Just as a buffer."
"Dan, it's not that serious," I protested.
"What's not that serious?" Skye asked. "Go where?"
"With Jack," I turned to her and her eyes widened. 
"Boy toy is here?"
"Would you shut up Skye?" I snapped at her. "I told you it's not like that."
Dan's mouth dropped comically. 
"It's not like that, Dan," I repeated to him. "I'll be fine."
"Just take her with you," he told me. 
"Alright, come on Blue," I pulled Skye with me and went to Jack's car waiting outside.
"Hey Jack," she waved at him as I pushed her into the back seat. 
"Hi," he grinned, turning to look at me surprised. "Coming with us?"
"Hope you don't mind," I told him, getting in. "Promised her we were going to spend the day together and she's already buzzed. I didn't want to leave her."
"Yeah, no problem. She can chill by the pool while we work on the project."
"You have a pool," Skye piped up in the back and I rolled my eyes. She was like a kid. "Dude how rich are you?" 
Skye asked again when we arrived at Jack's mansion. I knew he was well off but not this wealthy.
Jack chuckled and we followed him into the house. Inside were two guys playing video games. Jack introduced us and I noticed Skye and one of them checking each other out. 
"This Mark and this is Kyle," Jack turned to Skye. Noticing the attraction between them too. "This is my friend Skye from school and YN."
"Hey," Kyle got up and smiled at Skye. 
"Hey," she replied.
"Y/N and I are going to work on a project. Do you guys mind keeping Skye company in the pool?" Jack asked, ushering toward the deck where there were couches and a table for us to work at.
"Sure," Kyle said. "Do you want to borrow a swimsuit? There's some in the pool house."
"Yeah," she grinned. "Have fun nerds," she waved at us while we stayed behind.
Jack shook his head laughing and sat back with his laptop. 
"So where were we?" He asked.
"Um, my notes," I lifted my notebook and passed it to him. "I wrote down here some things I thought we should add to the paper."
We fell back into the grind and I tried not to think about what Dan said about being careful around Jack. He seemed like a normal guy. He was nice to me. I wonder what could have gone on for Tyler not to like him.
"You seem distracted," Jack commented. "Let's go into the pool. We're nearly done anyway. We can finish up another day."
"Uh, no I'm good. I think we should go though."
"Come on, just take a dip. It's too hot today and we deserve it," he said, taking off his shirt. 
"Are you guys done?" Skye shouted. "Come in the pool!"
Jack smiled at her then looked back at me. I rolled my eyes at them. Skye came running over and took my hand as she led my reluctant self to the pool house to change.
"Skye, I don't know about this. I think we should go," I told her as she lifted up some bikinis to see how they looked on me. 
"No," she whined. "I'm just getting to know Kyle. I really like him. I want a boyfriend this summer too."
"Then get his number. I don't think we should be here."
"Why?" 
"Just something Dan said. He told me Jack and Tyler used to know each other and some shit went down."
Skye raised an eyebrow. "Oh, well that makes things awkward. But we're already here," she smiled. "Let's stay just one more hour and you can ask Jack what happened. Maybe you can fix things between them and we'll all be friends."
"Mmhmm, what about Dante?" She rolled her eyes in response.
"That's over and hey you're the one who has a boyfriend. Does Hook know you're here with Jack? Does he even know your study partner is a guy?"
Now that she mentioned it, I never talked to Tyler about Jack. Or told him that he was a guy. I guess I never really thought about it.
"No and Dan told me not to tell him," I bit my lip. I reached for my phone in my pocket. I had an unread text from Tyler.
I heard you took Skye with you but not me 😔 
It was last minute. I'm sorry
I was joking 😁 call me if you guys need a ride. I'm still at the restaurant with the lads.
"So can we stay?" She asked silently, begging with her eyes. 
"Fine but just an hour," I pointed at her and took the bikini from her.
We're okay. Skye wants to stay a little longer. I'll see you tonight 💕
I went out to the pool and Skye went back to talking with Kyle. Jack passed me a drink and I smiled at him. 
"I think Kyle likes Skye."
"Yeah she likes him too."
Jack studied me silently. 
"Is something wrong?" He inquired. "You've seemed out of it since we came back from the restaurant."
"Um," I swallowed my drink. "I need to ask you something."
"Go ahead," he shrugged, then sat up on the edge as he looked down at me in the pool.
"Do you know Hook?"
I couldn't see his reaction with his sunglasses on but his shoulders tensed.
"Yeah," he nodded. "He and I used to hang out. Don't tell me he's the Tyler you're dating?"
"Yeah," I replied, awkwardly.
He snickered. "Small world."
"So why did you stop hanging out?" I asked him tentatively. I was still weirded out by Danhausen's reaction.
Jack remained silent for a minute. 
"We didn't see eye to eye on some things. So we had a falling out and I haven't talked to him since," he smiled but I knew there was more he wasn't telling me.
I wondered if it has to do with the mob. Could Jack also be part of that world? Did I fall into a universe where everyone was in the mob or something?
"That doesn't mean we can't be friends," he looked at me. "Tyler will respect that. He's a cool dude…usually," he murmured more quietly. 
There was definitely more to the story. But baby steps. I wanted to talk to Tyler first to gauge his reaction. 
"Yeah, we're still friends Jack," I gave him a reassuring grin and let it go for now. 
Skye called us over and we played some games for a little while. She was taking pics and videos of us while I drank some more margaritas and let loose.
I was going up the stairs to get my towel and catch some sun when I heard some commotion going on inside. Mark had gone in to get more drinks so I thought it was just him. But I heard some other voices yelling too. 
Skye and I shared a look before I glanced inside and found Tyler coming through the double doors. The lads followed right behind him and they did not look happy.
"Tyler?" I asked, confused by his sudden appearance.
Before I could ask how he knew where I was, he punched Jack in the face as he was going toward him. The awful crack resounded all through the pool area.
"Tyler!" I shouted in surprise and ran toward them. Jack on the floor bleeding from his mouth. "What's wrong with you?" 
He scoffed. "What are you doing here with him? Like that," he motioned to my two piece bikini.
"We were just working on a project. I told you!" I screamed in his face as he glared at me.
"This doesn't look like it. How long have you been seeing him?"
"What?" He's got to be kidding me. Did he think I had something going on with Jack behind his back? "We go to the same class!"
Tyler didn't say anything, just stared at me with his jaw clenched and his accusing eyes. I sighed, exasperated with him and bent down to check on Jack who was spitting blood on the wet floor.
"Jack, are you okay?" I asked. Jack's lip was busted open and Tyler didn't look guilty at all. "Shit, I think you need stitches." 
"I'm alright YN," he put his hand on my waist as I helped him stand up.
"Don't touch her."
Tyler pushed Jack's hand away from me.
"You haven't changed," Jack sneered at Tyler.
Clearly, there was bad blood between them long before I met them. But I wasn't impressed with this macho act by Tyler.
"Stay away from my girlfriend, Jack," Tyler warned.
"Or what? You're gonna shoot me? You psychopath," Jack yelled and Tyler shoved him into the water. 
"Tyler!" I screamed for the third time since he got here.
"Get your things. We're going."
"No, Tyler what the fuck are you doing? We gotta take Jack to the E.R.," I looked back at Jack and Tyler took my distraction and picked me up over his shoulder.
"Tyler!" I squawked.
"Get her things," he told Anthony who nodded as Tyler carried me out of the house.
"No, Tyler let me go!"
He let me go until we reached his car and he threw me in the passenger seat. 
"Are you insane?" I shouted when he got inside the car. "You can't just burst into people's houses and knock them out."
"Jack's done so much worse."
"What happened between you two? How did you know where we were? Did Dan tell you?" I groaned, I had so many questions, I couldn't understand Tyler.
"Dante saw Skye's insta story and saw you in the background with Jack." He pulled out of the driveway roughly. "Wait, did Dan know about you and Jack?"
"There's no me and Jack!" I screamed. "You're being ridiculous. There's nothing going on with me and Jack for the record. We're just friends from school, even Skye knows him."
Tyler didn't say anything or turned to me. He just gripped the steering wheel and clenched his jaw the entire way. I didn't even know where we were going.
"You don't trust me," I murmured quietly. 
For him not to trust me was a low blow I couldn't take. Especially when I had no clue that he and Jack knew each other until this morning. 
As he arrived at my house. We sat in the car both seething while I dared him to look at me. But he didn't. He kept looking to the side, away from me. 
"You're an asshole," I choked over a sob as I started crying. 
I got out of the car and opened my gate. Dante barely gave me my things as I slammed my door and ran inside my house.
The rest of the weekend I stewed in my house. Tyler didn't call me and I refused to be the first to give in. I opted out of going to work on Monday. I didn't know if Tyler would be there but I didn't want to risk it. I didn't want to see him.
Then on Tuesday I went back to class. Jack wasn't there and I was kind of relieved even though we really needed to talk. He did show up after class when I was walking out.
"Hey," Jack said with his hands in his pockets, he had stitches on his lip and I winced in sympathy.
"I'm sorry about Tyler."
Jack scoffed, "You don't need to apologize for him. He overreacted, it wasn't your fault."
"What happened between you two?"
Jack looked uncomfortable but answered. "Uhh, how much do you know about Hook's business…?"
"Are you also in the…it?"
He nodded silently. 
"So are you guys some kind of rivals or something?"
"Uh," Jack lingered. "More like best friends turned enemies. Last summer we were best buds but things happened and now he can't see me without," he paused and motioned to his mouth.
"Sorry."
"I hope this doesn't change our friendship. But if Tyler doesn't want you near me, we can do this through emails..texts until we're done with class."
"Don't be ridiculous," I smiled. "We'll work on this together. We can meet in the library. And of course we're still friends."
"And Tyler?"
"I don't know what's going to happen with him. We haven't talked since Saturday."
"If you want I can try to talk to him," Jack offered.
"No, that's okay. Don't worry about that."
This was something Tyler and I needed to fix ourselves. If there even was an us after Saturday.
"Wow," Skye said as I told her everything that happened. "That's why Tyler burst in there with the Lads hot on his heels."
"I can't even look at him. He's being such a jerk."
"Can you blame him though? He sees you soaking wet in a pool at his nemesis house. I'd be jealous too."
I glared at her, maybe it wouldn't have gone down like that if she hadn't made us stay. Or posted that video on Instagram. But I couldn't blame her. Plus I hadn't looked at it that way but my point still stands. He overreacted.
"Whatever, I just hope he doesn't come by the restaurant. If he comes, will you take his table?"
Skye gave me an unimpressed look. 
"You're going to have to talk to him someday."
Tyler did stop by the restaurant but I was attending another table. It was lunch time and we were full. I had a perfect excuse to ignore Tyler's stares whenever I passed by without giving him the time of day. 
Finally, he left and I breathed a sigh of relief. But it only lasted so long until I got a note from Skye.
"He told me to give it to you," she told me and gave me a "if you better not rip it i'll kill you" look so I rolled my eyes at her warning look and continued with my work.
The note burned in my pocket throughout the day. I finally opened it when I had a break.
We need to talk. I'll pick you up when your shift is over. 
I put it back in my pocket and tried not to think about it for the rest of the evening. When it was finally time to leave I debated on leaving through another exit. I fixed myself a few times and finally decided to go meet with Tyler.
He was leaning on his car, looking down at the floor. I hated him so much at that moment. I hated his stupid hair, his oversized clothes that hid his perfectly lean body, mostly I hated his stupid pout that made him look like a cute scolded overgrown baby.
I stopped in front of him and he glanced up at me with his stupid brown eyes. They softened as soon as he saw me and I resisted the urge to kiss his stupid face.
"I'm here," I crossed my arms in front of me.
He moved forward until we were face to face but I turned away when he tried to kiss me. He sighed and opened the door so I'd get inside the car. I sighed mentally and got in. 
He drove us to my place. We sat in silence inside his car, the windows down to let in the warm night air. The car's A.C. always gave me goosebumps so it wasn't too bothersome.
"I'm sorry," he said.
I let out a sigh and tilted my head against the seat. Softening at his pretty brown eyes.
"I'm sorry too. I should have talked to you about Jack when I found out you knew each other. Or at least told you what we were up to. I can't blame you for being jealous."
Tyler was silent for a moment. 
"More than jealous, I was worried about you."
I took in his words and processed them. 
"I'm okay. Jack wouldn't hurt me."
He side eyed me from the seat and I noticed his fists clenched in his lap. 
"You don't know what Jack is capable of… he's not who you think he is."
"Are you going to tell me who he is then? What happened between you guys last summer? He said you were best friends."
Tyler snapped his head to face me.
"You talked to him?" I ignored the accusatory tone in his voice.
"I saw him yesterday," Tyler's eyes slit. "His lip looks terrible by the way." Tyler rolled his eyes. "Can't you guys talk this out?"
"It's not that simple, babe."
I sighed once again and felt him touch my hand and let him intertwine our hands together.
"I don't want this to affect us," I whispered.
"It won't. I won't let it," he reached for my cheek and leaned in closer.
"Promise me that you will talk to me before jumping to any conclusions. This doesn't work if you don't trust me."
He lowered his eyes and smiled softly. "I trust you. I just don't trust him."
Now it was my turn to roll my eyes. 
"Jack is just a friend. He's nothing compared to you."
Tyler gave me one of his gorgeous smiles and I lent in to take his lips with mine. He grabbed my face with both hands and pressed deeper while I grasped his white t-shirt. 
He groaned into the kiss as our mouths devoured each other. Suddenly the heat in the air felt unbearable. My skin turned hot and I wanted Tyler to feel it. I broke the kiss as Tyler tried to keep kissing me.
"Wait," I said, taking a breath. "Do you want to come in?"
Tyler gave me a wide smile in return and nodded. We got out of the car like school kids. Meeting outside as I skipped and grasped his hand before we walked into my home.
"Good morning," I whispered to Tyler as he opened his eyes.
"Mmm morning'" he smiled sleepily.
His bare back was covered by the warm summer sun. The sheets pooled at his waist since we made up last night.
"Did you sleep well?"
He put a hand over my waist and pulled me over him as he sat up.
"You know I did," he mumbled into my chest as I huffed a laugh above. I laid my hand over his shoulder and massaged his neck and head for a minute.
"You know we have to get up and I need to go to work today right?"
Tyler groaned and pressed kisses to my neck. 
"I don't want you to leave this bed," he groaned.
"Tony may love me but I don't think he'll like it if I  take another day off, baby," I chuckled as he lifted his head, almost hitting me in the face.
"Sorry," he said sheepishly. He was too cute. Not the big bad monster I once thought he was going to be with me. I pecked his lips and smiled back at him, pushing his hair back.
Tyler shook his head like a wet dog and I chuckled. "Let me see your pretty face," I cooed.
"Not pretty. Handsome," he corrected. 
"Oh the cold hearted handsome devil," I teased him to his embarrassment.
"I didn't come up with that name," he said.
"You're too cute," he pouted. "Sorry, handsome," I giggled as I pushed him off and started to climb out of the bed. I was wearing my panties and his shirt while he put on his shorts and followed me to the kitchen. "Do you want pancakes?"
"Sure."
I opened the fridge and realized there were no eggs. "Oh damn, no eggs or bacon."
"I can go get some. Store is close by," he offered.
"Okay but hurry back," I told him as he pressed a kiss to my lips and I pulled him in deeper, moaning into the kiss.
Tyler left and I got to mixing the pancake batter. A few minutes later, I heard the doorbell ring.
"Did you run there? That was fast," I opened the door and gasped as I saw two masked men waiting and pushing inside.
I opened my mouth to scream but one covered it with a white towel. It came out muffled and I smelled an awful smell that I realized too late was chloroform. My eyes stung and I tried to keep them open as we got in the car.
I barely noticed Tyler coming down ahead of the road. He was running toward the car with a gun at the ready. But he wasn't shooting, probably for my protection. The car started and it looked to be heading toward Tyler when I pushed my way forward and hit the driver making him steer away from running over Tyler. An elbow came to my face quickly knocking me out and everything turned dark.
Tag List: @crowleysqueenofhell @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @legit9thlunaticwarrior @triscillal @wwenhlimagines @99hook @5secondsofmoxley (ask/dm to be added or removed)
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soonknight · 1 year
Text
[ Incoming 3:47pm ]
Jake Lockley x Reader (Dialogue Story)
Summary: You get a call from Jake. He's not very happy with you trying to get a rise out of him.
Warnings/Content: NSFW (minors DNI), smut, phone sex, dom!Jake x brat!reader, pre-negotiated kink rules, sexual threats, degradation kink, detailed descriptions of sexual activity/BDSM, dialogue story
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Hi, Jake-"
"-You fucking whore. You really think you can get away with that?"
"Get away with what?"
"Sending me pictures of you touching yourself, damn it, what do you think I'm talkin' about?"
"I don't know, I've sent a lot of texts to you today-"
"-That's two rules broken and you know it. You didn't have permission and you're not allowed to send me that shit at work. I'm walking to my car right now."
"Is it really that big of a deal to you, baby? I didn't think you'd get so upset."
"I'm not upset. I'm pissed. You're in so much fucking trouble."
"Yeah?"
"You think this is funny? Tryin' to rile me up?"
"...A little."
"It's not gonna be funny when I walk through that door. If you're not on your knees and undressed in the living room with our box by the time I get home, I will make sure you can't sit down for a week. Is that understood?"
"..."
"Fucking answer me. Is that understood?"
"Yes, sir."
"That's better. Now here's what's gonna happen. I'll be home in fifteen minutes, and when I get there, I'm tying you up and fucking your face until I decide I'm done with you. Then, I'm gonna lay you down on the couch and finger you until you're screaming. I'll decide on the drive if it'll be from getting edged or coming too much. You don't get my cock, you don't get my tongue. That's what you want, and I'm not gonna give it to you."
"Jake-"
"-See you soon."
thanks for reading! i might write what happens when jake gets home, but feel free to beat me to it and tag me <3 {masterlist}
650 notes · View notes
curatoroffiction · 2 years
Note
Can i get a comfort fic of MC who's on their monthly and is having a really hard time, and Mammon cares for MC throughout? Im in need of some comfort T^T
Thankieww - artist anon♡
Absolutely! I hope that your time of the month gets a little easier. I had a lot of fun writing this. I hope it's every bit as fun for you to read!
Warnings:
AFAB MC
Detailed and graphic descriptions of menstrual cycle experiences
Gender-Neutral MC
Slightly dramatic beginning, because ✨I live for the drama.✨
------------------------------------------------------------------------------ You pause in your step, feeling a very familiar clawing in your gut. You reach out and grasp around, catching Mammon's worried forearm as he realizes you're lagging behind by more than a few steps. His blue-gold eyes look to you with concern as he sees your brow furrow. "Hey, hey, what's wrong?? What's goin' on??" He asks, stopping everything for you.
"A demon is trying to claw its way out of my uterus and it's trying to use my spine as a set of double doors" You gasp the vivid imagery to him and he's instantly concerned. He checks your back, but he's not seeing anything. He reaches to touch it, nervous, and when he does, you can feel the way his fingers gently massage into your lower back. Your shoulders relax to his touch.
"Issit a curse?? Are you dying?? I don't feel anythin' back here." The grip you have on his forearm relaxes as you get used to the cramping. It came on so suddenly. You thought you'd be fine for school, but obviously this just isn't going to work.
".. I need to go back home. Help me..?"
"Don't hafta ask me twice!" He goes to hoist you up and you groan, causing him to realize he needs to be more delicate with your midsection. He instead moves to gently ease you into his arms, your back against his right arm, your knees slung over his left. Your face is resting against his chest as he carries you, more worried for you than anything.
The shame is, today, you guys were the first to actually leave the house. You were going to be on-track to beat even Lucifer to school, but things didn't pan out in your favor.
Which also means, as he's carrying you back, the brothers each spot you two, and you end up collecting a worried entourage as Mammon gets you home.
"Why can't they walk?" Satan is more than a little worried, considering how much he's read on human ailments.
You groan. "Pain."
"Why are they in pain??" Asmodeus pouts, sad that you're having to deal with something so unpleasant.
"Dunno." Mammon doesn't care what the cause is - You asked him to take you home, so that's what he's going to do.
"Are you gonna be okay, ___?" Beelzebub is visibly concerned for you, Belphegor quietly following after the group as he takes note of every answer.
"Yeah. I think. Just. Can't do school. Not today."
Lucifer steps out of the house, locking up, only to turn to see a commotion at the gate. His brothers, not going to school, crowding around you, crumpled in Mammon's arms. ". . ."
Mammon calls out to him "Open the damn door! They gotta get inside!"
Lucifer opens the door, but he does take the lead of the brothers following after Mammon so he can get to the bottom of this problem.
Mammon sets you down on the couch in the main area and you miss the comforting security of his arms as he pulls away- But being able to curl up on your side is making you feel significantly better.
"Was something wrong with breakfast? What's happening?"
"It's my monthly." You tiredly hiss as you soothe yourself, hugging a pillow to your chest.
A few lightbulbs go off in the heads of the demons around you. Some, however, stay dim.
"Monthly what? Monthly bitch? Monthly pest? Monthly pain in the ass that's gonna get fucked up??" Mammon's pretty much ready to fight anything. "You said a demon was tryin'a claw its way outta yer spine, where are they?!"
Satan puts a hand on his shoulder. "Mammon. They're shedding their uterine lining. It's a painful process, but they'll ultimately be okay."
"Is it gonna be this painful the whole time?!" He looks to you, worried.
You've finally gotten a handle on the pain. You slump against the couch, shaking your head tiredly. "No.. But I'm not fit for school.." You look up to Mammon, his concern flooding through you as he worries about you.
"I'll have Levi set you up for distanced learning." Lucifer is already working on contingencies. "Is there anything we can get you to make the day easier?"
".. Can someone stay with me..?" You're shy as you ask. You can take care of yourself, but, it'd really make you feel loved if someone else could help you instead. "… I just.. don't want to be alone.. … And my needs might change throughout the day."
Lucifer can't even give his input when Mammon declares himself as your protector and caretaker for the day. "I'm the one you put in charge of 'em, ain't I?!" He almost looks like he's ready to fight Lucifer if he's about to say anything in protest. Lucifer exhales with a soft smile. He loves seeing how soft you've made his family.
"Alright. Everyone else; To school. Mammon will take care of ___ from here."
"Take care~" Asmodeus leans over the back of the couch, tugging you into a hug, giving you a gentle squeeze. "Mammon's lucky, getting to share all day with you ~"
Satan yoinks Asmodeus away from you, handing you your D.D.D, which fell earlier. "Don't hesitate to ask for help if you need it."
"Or to use the HoL Akuzon account to get yourself the things you need for your monthly." Lucifer adds, giving you a nod of his approval.
Belphegor scowls at Mammon. "Do you even know how to take care of a human on their period?"
"I know how to kick yer ass, how's that?"
Mammon shoots him a scowl in return and Belphegor motions to his D.D.D as he looks past Mammon to you. "Seriously, don't hesitate to ask for help. Don't cover for this dumbass if he fucks something up."
You gently grasp the back of Mammon's shirt, preventing him from getting angry at Belphegor as he softens to your touch. "I'll be okay. Mammon's a good caretaker."
Mammon's face heats up as he looks away from you at his brothers. "That's right!! ___'s number one! No one's gonna be a better caretaker!"
You chuckle softly, which causes his heart to pitter away in his chest. When his brothers have left, he kneels beside your couch, holding your hand. He softly grips your hand, giving it a squeeze, flustered. You speak softly; "Thank you for helping me. Can you get a bath run for me? A hot bath always makes my cramps better. 100°-105° fahrenheit." You always have to specify specific temperatures, otherwise most of the demon brothers will accidentally almost boil you alive.
Mammon nods, gently caressing your head with his free hand. He was so worried earlier. Seeing you crumple against him made him glad he was able to be there for you, but it didn't make it any less scary.. He catches himself looking to you tenderly and gets flustered, quickly escaping to the nearest bathroom to prepare it for you.
He's no Barbatos or Asmodeus when it comes to setting up baths, but he does bring you a robe and a towel when he comes to get you. As you walk together, he explains what he did. "I stole some of Asmo's bath salts - There was a basket in his room with yer name on it, I just assumed it was stuff he set aside for ya'. Also I took a bubble bath from that basket too. I didn't wanna overwhelm ya' in case scents nausiate ya', so I didn't go addin' any of those bath melts or bath bombs?? But I put some on the counter if y'want them. There's also a bucket beside the bathtub if y'need to hurl."
"Scents nausiating me? Needing to hurl?" You're confused. What does he think you're going through?
"Yeah, don't humans on their monthly get super sensitive to foods and cravings, and have pain and sometimes puke?"
".. While there is some overlap, I think you're mistaking this for pregnancy. I'm not pregnant, Mammon."
"…" Mammon digests this new information. "What exactly's gonna happen to you?"
"Well, I'm going to have cravings, I sometimes get some intense emotions, and I experience pain. I get bloating, my body feels gross, everything's going to feel gross, and I'm going to be knocked on my ass with fatigue. That's all pretty normal considering I have an open internal wound right now."
"WAIT WHAT" Mammon's shocked. That's what a monthly is? An open wound internally every month?!
You can't help but laugh a little. "Yeah, my body has an organ that just rips its own inner lining out once a month. It's kind of like if your colon shed its inner skin once a month."
"WHAT THE FUCK" Mammon's visibly upset at the sheer idea, and his asshole clenches at the thought. He couldn't imagine that kind of pain, let alone every single month. He will not be getting over this any time soon.
You're looking around as he's grappling with the mortifying ordeal of having a uterus, and you ask "Mammon, did you bring any tampons for this bath? Or a menstrual cup or something?"
"Huh?"
"To soak up or catch the blood"
"WHAT"
"Yeah, the blood comes out. I don't want to be soaking in it in the bath."
Mammon shakes his head. Okay, so there's a lot more to this than he realized - But that doesn't mean you have to hold his hand through this. He's going to be the best protector/caretaker you ever had. "Okay, where do I find 'em?"
"I keep a drawer of them in my bathroom upstairs. The tampons are these little insertion type things in plastic wrapping, and the cup is in a box labeled appropriately."
"Got it."
He rushes upstairs and comes down to bring you the entire damn drawer and its contents. When you laugh, he feels embarrassed, but in a good way. It made you smile. You shoo him out of the bathroom so you can take a long soak and get the muscles in your lower back to stop spasming.
As you do, Mammon asks from outside the door "Hey, is there anythin' you're craving right now?"
"Oh man, that super greasy food from Hell's Burger sounds amazing.. but the sweetbread from Madame Scream's sounds really good too.. And Godevil Chocolatier's fudge? Mmm.. Oh, and that thing you made for dinner last week was amazing, but I don't think we have anymore leftovers.." You list off all the foods that sound good to you, that you can feel your body craving. "Mmm.. I can't choose. Anything I've listed would be awesome."
"Gotcha." Mammon heads off, leaving you to soak in your tub in peace.
Beside the tub, you see your favorite cold drink that Mammon forgot to tell you he grabbed for you. Popping it open, you rest back against the back of the tub, letting your body soak in the heat and the comfort. Mammon's very good at complimenting scents - He wears enough colognes and body products to know how to use products that compliment each other and don't overwhelm the person. Even as he was scrambling to figure everything out on the fly, he was focused enough to get the important details right.
You had a good choice of bath additives, and you were able to add whatever you wanted to the bath which made it comfy and soothing, but also fun and an experience. You almost forget about your situation as you get out of the tub and apply your moisturizers, then don your robe, putting on some slippers. The robe is fluffy and comfy and fits you perfectly. Asmodeus got it for you because it reminded him of when you were in your sheep form. You're hungry, so when you step out of the bathroom and smell some amazing food down the hall, you almost miss the pjs and underwear he left sitting, neatly folded on a small stepstool in the hall for you. You grab them, put them on, and then meander into the kitchen to find Mammon cooking the food he made last week for dinner. …. Surrounded by bags from various restaurants and stores of every other thing you rattled off the top of your head.
Mammon grins to you as you enter. "Eat up! You can have whatever you like! An' anything you don't wanna eat now, we can save for later. An' if you don't want it later, we'll let Beelzebub eat it."
You're a little overwhelmed at his generosity and kindness, shyly unwrapping some of the greasier food as he cooks and you sit at the kitchen island. "… thank you." Your voice is quiet. Mammon grins even bigger as he sets another of your favorite drinks that he knows goes well with the food you're eating in front of you.
"You'll never want for a thing while I'm around. You got that?"
You nod, smiling warmly to him as you rest against the counter. The way you look at him so warmly gets him flustered, so he turns away.
"… I was, uh, readin' up on these monthly things. I read massages are good for them?"
"Yeah, they can be. My body's feeling okay right now, I just wanna lay down and be cuddled for a while though.."
"Well I can do that too!" He quickly adds, as though you were going to go upstairs and ask Levi to snuggle with you instead or something. When he's done cooking, you grab a plate of the food he cooked, some fries from Hell's Burger, some chocolates, and two of your favorite drinks, and you head into the living room with him. Here, you find that he has a whole collection of blankets and pillows for you, which you quickly make a nest in with Mammon as the center. He hugs you as you rest atop him, the both of you laying on the couch as you watch tv and you snack on anything you crave in the moment.
Any moment that you shift to get up, or you want something, Mammon's quick to take it on his shoulders if he can instead, each moment just loving on you through his attentive service. But, you don't end up needing much because he's already met every need. His hands massage into your back as he holds you, and you hug him close, your head resting on his chest. You're buried in a mound of comfy blankets in the cool HoL air. It's warm, and Mammon's your key source of heat, enveloping you in comfort as he wouldn't let you go for anything.
It's easy for you to fall asleep in his arms like this.
You wake up a few hours later, and he's still awake, just gently caressing your back, affectionately looking to you. When he realizes you're awake again though, he quickly looks away in embarrassment. ".. mornin'."
".. Mornin'." You smile against him, stretching out against him, and then hugging him close. ".. thank you. I feel a lot better than I did this morning."
"Well of course y'do. Yer first and best man ain't about to let you down."
"I knew you wouldn't." You can feel the way his skin warms against yours with your praise. He hugs you close. The way you trust in him, and the way you come to him when you need someone, it never fails to make him feel proud of himself.
You never fail to make him feel on top of the world. He wonders if you realize just how wonderful you are to him, and how much you mean to him. Looking at you like this, he almost wants to say something and tell you exactly how he feels, but the sound of Levi entering the room causes him to chicken out. Levi brings in a laptop set up for you to do distanced learning, so you can catch up on the classes you missed today, as well as attend the remaining ones on your roster. Mammon almost sighs at just how bad Levi's timing is as you start to sit up.
Maybe for now, this moment here is good enough with you.
After all, it means the absolute world to him.
Even as you do your learning, Mammon hugs you from behind, resting his head anywhere from the top of your head to your shoulder, depending on how much you sink down.
He's here beside you every step of the way, until you tell him otherwise.
You did, after all, choose him to ask for help. And Mammon will never let you down if he can help it.
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altraviolet · 3 months
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I saw someone ask about the joint door, decided to share my notes on chapter 21 about said door— I find it sort of as a tool (? Not sure if that’s the right word for it) to show Rodimus’ growth specifically but that’s just my interpretation, I could be mistaken ofc:
This was the door to Drift's room.
No, this was the door to Soundwave's room. The one they shared. The one Rodimus had sealed up over and over. He lowered his hand. Wrong door.
I love that as his feelings for SW grow his hesitancy to open the down vanishes. Here he’s still a little hung up on Drift because he has never been able to vent about the gray years yet, later when Soundwave is ignoring him after the Stardrive incident he sneaks in the room— Update: In chapter 46 he just bursts in there and it is implied he comes through there all the time to be with Soundwave. I have the suspicion he barely leaves SWs room at this point.
Would love to hear more about your thought process including the door<3
First, the fact that you took notes and put down your thoughts concerning this detail makes my heart really happy, thank you for sharing 😭❤️
Second, you're spot on! The 'relationship' between Rodimus and the door changes as we move through the fic, and what you've stated above is correct. I'll admit, while writing, it wasn't cemented firmly in my brain in actual words. I just knew that the door would be ready when Rodimus was, and he'd use it.
Though! It might interest you to know that in my mind, for most of the fic, it was about Rodimus getting over his unhappiness with Drift. So, while you phrased it as, "Rodimus becomes more comfortable with Soundwave, so the door opens more," which to be clear IS TRUE, in my mind it started as "Rodimus becomes less uncomfortable that the room used to be Drift's, so the door opens more." There's a definite distinction there, but the two things happen to go hand-in-hand. One can't happen without the other.
I honestly can't remember labeling the door as a symbol in my brain early on while writing (some things are definitely Symbols and other things just Become Symbolic When I Look Back At Them), but if I had sat down and thought about it, or been directly asked, I would've realized that it is xD It's a literal door opening onto a new part of Rodimus's life, where he has let Drift go and welcomed SW in. By degrees, of course. There are a lot of messy feelings still, regarding Drift. And it's not always easy to let people in... we'll see more next chapter about that ;)
I'm trying to think if there was anything else about the door... oh yeah, he definitely used it when Drift lived next to him. For nighttime visits xD That's why he was so bitter about it later and had it sealed up. Those things aren't directly stated in the fic, but I'm hoping they don't have to be. It's all implied and follows the internal logic, so I hope folks picked that up.
And oh yes! One other thing. Folks may remember we got a description of Rodimus's room early on. I'mma copy paste that here as a reference for the next thing I wanted to share. Oh oh but while we're here:
The walls didn't answer. They did erupt into shifting holograms, photos and looping videos. Some were of Rodimus posing for the camera, action shots of him in battle or meteor surfing. Over the years, most of the solo images had been replaced by grinning selfies with friends, arms around shoulders, hoisting up a minibot or two.
The above, actually, isn't door related. I just wanted to say that the bolded sentence was meant to show that Rodimus had matured a little since LL #25. The tolls of their journey had forced him to recognize others above himself, and we see that reflected in the decor he chooses to display in his private space. OKAY back to the door:
Across the room was a collage of special images. Rodimus with the original crew of the Lost Light. Individual pics of him with 0001 Mirage and 0001 Trailbreaker and 0001 Skids. A pic of 0001 Ambulon with the rest of the medic crew. Tripodecta, Shock, and Ore sitting down for a drink together. Rodimus didn't have a picture with 0001 Atomizer. He did have a security footage loop of him and Whirl sneaking down a hallway. As always, Rodimus's gaze shifted from the photographs to the section of wall they adorned. It had once been a door. A door between his and Drift's room.
The door, very very specifically, is where he displays pictures of the mechs who died during the LL's canon adventure. These are the mechs he's always looking for. The ones he's already found, of course, are Trailbreaker, Ambulon, and Mirage.
So the door symbolizes not just his past with Drift, but his failures (in his mind) as a captain to keep those original crew members alive. That detail was deliberately chosen to link all those things together. No one's ever asked about it or mentioned it, as far as I can recall, but now you know :)
Woo, that's a lot of pressure for one little door!
So swinging back to your ask, in Ch 21 Rodimus was so excited to talk to Soundwave, he momentarily forgot how much he hated that door, and went right for it. And yes, when SW was avoiding him, he sneaked in that way (since there's a camera in the hall). And yup, he does spend quite a few nights at SW's now ;D
Hmmmmmmm... ok, I think that's it for the door! If you have any other questions just let me know. Thank you again for the interest in my writing!!
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cardassiangoodreads · 2 months
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Oh another recent YA book that I really liked was Firekeeper's Daughter by Angeline Boulley, but I think some of that was personal bias as well - it may be one of the most Pure Michigan (TM) books ever written, which is why I even recommended it to fellow YA-hater @larkandkatydid
But it also felt like a bit of a throwback to the kind of YA that was bigger in the 90s and early 00s, when I was reading YA regularly as a preteen: It's a thriller that is about contemporary Social Problems (specifically, drug crime in rural/small-town minority communities) that is frank about them in a way that appeals to bookish teenagers' curiosity about that stuff but also doesn't talk down to them. It knows that they can handle a description of how meth is made without it meaning they're going to go out and try it, for instance. It was very refreshing relative to how so much contemporary YA feels like it has to be something that would be T-rated on AO3, like teenagers can't "handle" "darker" topics dealt with seriously and in detail. It's still unsubtle and didactic in places, but not to a degree that I found particularly irritating, just like "oh yeah, well, this was definitely written for someone a lot younger than me." (It's more irritating in something like Babel because that is supposed to be a book for adults! In a lot of actual YA I'm just like, well okay fine I'm not the intended audience for this book, that's okay.)
I've also complained a lot about how "#OwnVoices" has become more of a marketing category that ends up actually stifling a lot of true diversity of experiences being represented (which is also apparently one of the things that R.F. Kuang's newest book is about, another reason it seems a bit more encouraging to me I suppose), so I appreciate that Firekeeper's Daughter is the most genuine expression of OwnVoices. Angeline Boulley is Ojibwe from Sault Ste. Marie and she is writing about that community, during the time when she would've been living there as a teenager. You can really, really tell that with this book, and as someone from a completely different part of that state who is not indigenous American, all of it still felt so real to me - some of it resonated with my own growing-up-in-Michigan-in-the-2000s experience (ice hockey being a huge deal! crossing the border to Canada as this routine, everyday thing! gigantic cars and garages as status symbols! snow pants!) but the parts that didn't you could just tell were every bit as authentic. I really love books that just submerge you in a community you'd never get to experience otherwise and that book does that 1000%.
(And at the same time, it's not autobiography. You can tell these characters, including the protagonist, are similar to people she might have known growing up but not exactly the same.)
And there's also that in being about contemporary indigenous American communities, rather than a historical novel (I mean, it's historical in that it's set in 2004, but you know what I mean), it's bucking the usual trend for what "progressive" non-indigenous people want to see in those kinds of stories. They really just did let Boulley write what she knows.
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jacksprostate · 3 months
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Was just wondering how you manage to replicate palahniuk’s style so well and also obviously write his characters?
Love your blog btw!
There's a few things that go into it!
Firstly, I have the advantage of, according to my friends, before I read any of his stuff my style was already kind of Chuck adjacent. I tend to be very rhythmic in my writing, I do like to have little repetitions, I like fun descriptions — similar to how he focuses on things reading aloud well, and favoring offbeat descriptions, his little ritual words, etc. That's my biggest secret, I just already wrote pretty close to it without knowing, so I didn't have a whole lot to change. Similar dog learning new tricks sort of deal. That said, there IS stuff I actively think about, especially with regard to character voice:
There's some things I'd call window dressing — minor changes that make it more recognizable. This would be things such as: the narrator does not get put in quotes, slips into 2nd person, using a rhythm where the dialogue tag goes in front (generally Tyler says, blah, not blah, Tyler says). That also makes it feel more active and present. I also like to outright include the occasional line from the book as a referential repetition, or a spoof on a line, I think that's the fun of fanfiction. But if those lines stand out glaringly it can be a sign you either need to change your style or maybe you're just trying to stick it somewhere it doesn't belong.
There's some bigger things: sentence variation is another thing I've invested pretty heavily in on my own and something I highly recommend any writer get in the habit of, but in trying to match his character voice I do consciously feel for when something is getting too long, specifically. The key with Chuck is he can have long sentences, but they're made out of short ideas. Long sentences often become grammatically incorrect as they're separate ideas jammed together for rhythm and sense.
He also shies away from adjectives; I kind of ignore this because I love a good adjective, but I've learned from it by making sure each one is impactful in its own way. Avoid superfluousness, keep things moving. He also shies away from stereotypical descriptions, I enjoyed building my confidence making weird ones. It's something I'm keeping going forward.
Another thing with his style is he loves fun facts. Fortunately I also love fun facts. To do those you have to keep it relevant, symbolic/metaphorical, purposeful, and simple. You can totally get complex, but only using simple building blocks. It's not to show everyone you know something, it's to build a little cliff to push the narrator off of. People don't need the detailed rockwork.
He often has little... almost like an aside? The narrator will ramble or think about something else for a little bit before getting back to the present. That shaky hold on the Now contrasts with how action focused everything is and allows moments of rest even if its still action.
As for character voice, the narrator; by following the above, you can get most of it, and then remembering his general view of the world to keep things in theme. He shouldn't be happy. He should have a lot of surpressed rage. Etc. Good character writing starts with a good understanding of the character, and that's real important for whoever your pov is. Always important to check if stuff passes the "he wouldn't fucking say that" test. When I have dialogue for him, it's almost an extension of his thoughts. I mentally read it to myself with the dull affect Ed Norton used for the movie monologue, really that shit was perfect. I usually can't keep a voice in my head like that but that one... yeah.
Tyler on the other hand I have to be pretty conscious about, sometimes I'll go back through the book and read some of his lines. He tends to be very direct. Very rarely uses names, it's tempting to use psycho boy or ikea boy all the time but it's the devil speaking. Tyler is direct, always serious even when he's laughing, his statements are not mitigated at all, if he is saying a pet name it is for its own impact not to soften any sort of statement. Rhythmically I find this directness difficult sometimes, but the 'Tyler says' dialogue tag makes it feel like a religious call and response on the narrators part and serves to soften things — but have that be the narrator's perspective and choice, not Tyler's. It's pretty heavily repeated in the book. Tyler also requires a "He would not fucking say that" test and I think I've gotten better at his dialogue over time (ex: retroactively, Tyler's dialogue in my psychoactive fish story s u c k s. I mean, it works, but I didn't really have a strong grasp on him at the time and while the actions sound like him, the words and delivery don't. Now though I think my snippets and the dildo fic are pretty strong!) A lot of it is just practice and tuning your ear. Reference the original material and try to dissect it.
Hope this makes sense :) if there's anything specific where you're like "how'd you write that" I can try to answer. Glad you enjoy my blog!
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Text
Head over heels in love.
Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem!Reader (no physical descriptions) 
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Summary: Steve goes with Y/N to an admissions college party and things don´t go exactly as they expected. (Yep, keeping it vague bc i suck at summarys)
Word count: 2.6k
Warnings: Based in the beginning of season 3. Arguments, fluff, and a tiny bit of angst. Steve is one year older than reader. Some curse words. (English is NOT my first language)
A/N: Hi! Tbh I thought I would only write one fic but I got super motivated to do like a whole different scenes from Dawson´s Creek and incorporate it to Stranger Things somehow…so yeah- hope you guys enjoy! <3 thank you so much for reading my other fic too!
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Steve found himself outside of Hawkins High waiting for his girlfriend to come out so they could hang out, it's been a while since they had their fun, you know, with Y/N worrying about her college applications and Steve working full time at the new mall.
When Y/N didn't show he decided to go inside what could be described by many as the hell hole. Steve was a little nervous, but he had to do something, so, he walked in and started looking for the Y/H/C girl. After what seemed like an eternity of looking and asking around, he saw her going down the stairs by herself and he thought it would be the perfect time to surprise her.
“Steve! what are you doing here?”
Steve moved very quietly to where Y/N was now standing and picked her up from behind causing her to yelp for a moment until she realized what was happening. They both started to giggle in a way that would make lots of people throw up. It was way too adorable.
“Well, Missy, you took a while and I decided to come to look for you”
“Right…sorry, I was looking at the last details for the party on Saturday night.”
Oh, yeah, Steve remembers 'the party'. “Do we have to?” he whined.
“Yes, Steve, we have to,” said Y/N for what felt like the tenth time.
“Well, have you thought about hiring an escort? Because from what I'm told you can't take me anywhere.”
“I called around, but they're all out of socially-presentable man-meat.”
“What if I just broke up with you? What would you do then?”
“Look, do what you have to do. You're still coming with me.”
“Fascist.” Steve sighed.
“Scaredy-cat,” said Y/N with a dramatic shocked voice.
“Are we at least gonna have a good time?” he said hopefully but deep down he knew it wasn't very likely.
“My guess is no.” Why sugarcoat it?
“So why can't we just say “Nay” to the whole idea of hanging out with the prep school contingent, and go over to Dustin's party?”
"Because, Steve, that would severely diminish my chances of getting into college," she said a matter of factly.
"Well, when you put it that way--"
"Stevie?" she started doing that pouty face that melted Steve's heart. Every. Time.
"Yes." he looked down, it was hard to look at that face and stay in check with your initial argument.
"You know how important this party is to me."
"Yes, I know," he said in a whisper-like voice.
"And being in a relationship means that sometimes you have to do things that you don't particularly enjoy for that other person."
"Yeah."
That made Steve finally look up. "Oh, hold on. Do you think that I enjoy those dinners for one second? For the record, we could stop those at any time." his voice becoming more excited.
Y/N decided to continue to prove her point. "You know, for me, that would be Sunday dinners with your parents."
Steve chuckled lightly. "Yeah, I really am. Is it working?"
Y/N could read his intentions. At the end of the day, she knew him better than anyone. "I know you're still trying to get out of this party."
"It's like watching a train wreck." She deadpanned and gave him a kiss on the cheek with a grin on her face.
Later that week
The couple started walking with arms linked to each other. Y/N was wearing a simple black dress that cut at the knee with some sensible black heels. Steve, on the other hand, was wearing a suit, which Y/N haven't seen him in since his graduation day. Let's be real, he looked extremely handsome, with his perfect hair and that smile that could cure disease.
"You know, we can always just turn around. Which would, of course, be incredibly cowardly."
Walking through the stairs you could tell Y/N was nervous by how she kept furrowing her face making her look worried. Steve like always, noticed that.
Y/N breathed out. "Yet sounds incredibly appealing." she let out a nervous laugh.
By this point Steve couldn't take his eyes off her, he felt truly lucky to be able to call her his. Lost in thought he couldn't help but smile.
Y/N looked at Steve with confusion in her eyes, yet his face also made her smile. "You're grinning like an idiot."
"Yeah, I know. I can't help it," he said with such a gentle voice.
"Why?" She was beginning to get nervous. What could he possibly be smiling about right now?
"Because…I'm the only guy at this party who gets to walk in with Audrey Hepburn on his arm." Yep. Steve in love was a total sap. No one can convince us otherwise.
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"You've certainly been quiet tonight, Miss Y/L/N."
Steve and Y/N sat at the table with Walter, the head figure of admissions. Making Y/N even more nervous if that's even possible.
Y/N chuckled awkwardly. "Just soaking it all in, I guess."
"Why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself?"
Damn, could this get any worse? "Um...there's really not much to tell. I'm pretty much your average teenage girl," she said with a tender smile that she hoped would hide all her insecurities right now.
By now Y/N was hoping for a miracle that would make things less awkward.
"Having reviewed your application, I hardly think so. I seem to remember a certain fondness for art. Have you been to the Guggenheim?"
"No, but I have always wanted to go to New York..."
"Well, the building itself…It's really the most amazing feat of construction. It's an extraordinary combination of intersecting shapes. It's an architectural epiphany."
Steve could tell how uncomfortable Y/N was, she had this embarrassed look on her face so he thought it wouldn't hurt if he cut in on the conversation.
"Nah, I don't know. You ask me, the thing just looks like a big artichoke."
Y/N turned to him in total shock and so did the other guests. Silence overcame the table until of course Steve kept talking.
"No, I'm serious, it does."
Walter looked intrigued by his comment. "Oh, so you've been?" you could tell it was a genuine question with genuine interest.
"Well, no, but my parents, their big architecture buffs, and they're into those coffee table art books. So, I've seen all the pictures, and I'm here to tell you, it looks like a big artichoke."
After what felt like the most awkward tension they had ever lived, Walter started to laugh, making everyone laugh with him like some type of clockwork.
"Big artichoke. You're right. It does look like an artichoke." he seemed to not be able to control his laughter. Y/N smiled confused and gave a little laugh at the scene.
----------------------------------
"So, then the Rabbi says, “Rectum? I damn near killed 'em!”
Y/N seemed to not be able to make a profound conversation like she hoped to make the best impression. She just sat there contemplating what she could do to make this better while Steve here was making Walter have a great time with his funny little comments. Y/N knew Steve had always been a social butterfly, he used to be “King Steve” for a reason. But she certainly wasn't expecting him to enjoy this so much after the crap he gave her earlier this week about the event.
Walter kept laughing the entire time. "Good one, right?" said Steve with that smile.
He was nearly choking by how much he was laughing at this point. While Y/N just could help but be a little jealous of Steve's social skills.
"It's very good. Y/N, I had no idea your boyfriend was such a charmer."
She gave a fake smile that only Steve could read. "Who knew?"
Walter got serious for a moment. "Emerson could use a young man like you, Steve. Why haven't you applied?" Well, this got interesting.
Y/N saw this as an opportunity to get some time in the conversation. "Yeah, Steve, why haven't you? She knew the answer, he didn't get into any college yet and his parents were trying to teach him a lesson by making him work his ass off.
Steve got quiet for a moment trying to think of an answer. "Well, I-- To be perfectly honest, uh, both of my parents are real big lefties, so for me, it's Yale or nothing."
"Well, that certainly is our loss." Walter seemed genuinely sad at that answer.
Y/N had enough by now, she didn't understand what the hell was happening right now.
"Hey, Steve, can I talk to you for a second?"
"Yeah sure." he seemed very calm.
"Outside. Excuse us." she faked a smile again.
--------------
Y/N started to walk as fast as she could, and she looked pissed.
"Steve, I can't believe you just did that."
"Just did what?" he didn't see any problem.
"You lied!" she got more and more desperate by the second.
That's when Steve started to understand where she was going with this.
"Hold on a second--"
"After that whole pseudo-motivational diatribe, you flat out lied."
"Y/N/N, can I have the floor for just a second--" he really wanted to explain what was going on inside.
"Why are you trying so hard to impress these people?"
"Are you done yet?" he deadpanned.
She seemed to not be able to stop saying all her thoughts making it impossible for Steve to explain himself.
"I don't even know who you are right now." she sighed.
"All I'm try-"
"Excuse me, Steve. Excuse me. I would love for you to meet the dean. Do you mind, Y/N?" Walter seemed very excited.
And of course, with their luck, they were interrupted. By Walter of all people.
What was Y/N supposed to even say to that? "Course not." she fake smiled for the third time that night.
"Sure," said Steve, looking at Y/N with an unreadable expression while he turned the other way.
Walter started to chuckle. "He's a great guy. An old friend. I'd love for him to hear the, uh…"
"Two Rabbis."
"Yeah." He laughed.
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Y/N sat at one of the benches outside and couldn't help but cry. What happened tonight? It clearly didn't go as she wanted, and sadness took over her while she sobbed. She didn't even notice Walter coming back outside.
"Hi, Y/N," he said with an understanding tone.
Shit. Y/N thought. She wiped her tears and acted like he didn't see her crying her eyes out just a second ago. "Uh, hi, Mr. Kubelik, um…I'm sorry, I…I think I need to apologize."
He was confused but calmed. "Really? Whatever for?"
Y/N sighed. "Well, I think I blew it tonight. And it's just, um, this is kind of a whole new world for me, and I, um, I don't really know what to do or what to say, and I know that I don't fit in very well--"
"Y/N, you didn't blow anything. Your academic record stands on its own. You're a stunningly bright young lady. No one is grading you on your social skills.
She looked a little more relieved. Like she could breathe again.
"Be that as it may, you couldn't ask for a better character witness than that boyfriend of yours."
Y/N looked up into his eyes confused and wanting him to elaborate on his last comment.
"Seriously. He just talked the dean's ear off, all about you. How you've changed him, how you've helped him. How he couldn't imagine a better life than one with you by his side. What a rare gift, to have someone say such things about you."
She couldn't help to smile a little and get all shy about it.
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Finally, the party was over, and Y/N joined Steve after she said her goodbyes to some people at the event. Even though the last time they saw each other they didn't see eye to eye, the moment they looked at each other, they felt the need to be in each other's arms.
"Apology accepted," mumbled Steve.
Y/N removed her head from his shoulder. "I didn't apologize, Stevie," she said while furrowing her eyebrows in confusion.
"Well, no, but you were going to."
Y/N gave him a smug smile. "I was?"
"Yeah, you were going to apologize for bitching me out earlier." he was being pretty forward about the whole situation, you had to give him that.
Y/N started to match his energy. "And what about you? You're the one who lied."
Of course. Steve looked deep into her eyes so she could see his honesty. "Did it ever occur to you that maybe I was doing that all for you?"
Y/N's eyebrows shoot up. "And how, exactly, do I benefit from your distortion of the truth?"
"Well," he started to stroke her hair very delicately and continued with all he wanted to say earlier.
"Maybe I just wanted these people to see you through my eyes just for one night. To see this girl, this woman, who has more class and intelligence and beauty and grace than anyone else who's walking the face of the planet."
Y/N's eyes started to water; she opened her mouth to say something, but she shut it again when he kept going.
"And maybe things like this just come tumbling out of my mouth because I happen to be head over heels in love with you, but the really scary thing is--is…I think that they're true."
Y/N's heart melted but at the same time, she started to feel guilt and embarrassment because of her reaction earlier.
"Sorry, Steve. I just wanted to impress these people so bad, you know, to fit in, and I completely froze."
Steve cupped her face and with the softest voice, one could ever imagine he said. "Hey, that doesn't matter."
She took a step back from his embrace. Anxiety took over her. "Yes, it does! I've never wanted anything so bad in my whole life. And you--you just fit right in better than I ever will."
So that's what this was about. "Because there's nothing at stake for me here, Y/N/N. I have nothing to prove to these people. And Y/N/N, this world, is opening its doors to you. And when you step through, you are going to be such an amazing part of all of this.  And wherever you choose to go, you're doing them the favor, not the other way around.
"You know, your mom should get a medal."
Jeez. Y/N truly was tearing up with a small smile. She would never get used to Steve's love words. It made her heart do flip-flops, to say the least.
Well, Steve wasn't expecting that, but he went along with it. "Mom? Really, why's that?"
"Because she raised the perfect boy. And maybe things like that just tumble out of my mouth because I happen to be head over heels in love with you, but the scary thing is, I think it's true," she said with the biggest smile.
Steve pulled away for a second, staying very close to her."Mmm. What do you say if you and I take our little mutual admiration society on the road? Please, can we go someplace we both fit in?"
They couldn't help but chuckle at each other's words making them have the most passionate yet tender kiss that day.
"Yeah. Let's go."
FEEDBACK IS GREATLY APPRECIATED <3
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simplyanotherartist · 11 months
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How much salt do you think a salt fic should have before it becomes too unpleasent to read?
Hmm, I think it all comes down to the delivery really. I don't care for salt fics much with they just dump a whole truckload of backstory salt on us- Like a few fics have told how terribly Marinette's been treated, but they explain it all in one or two sittings? Like- okay, yeah, it's terrible that they abused her trust and used her to get free stuff, but could you wait a bit before telling us about the very-detailed 13 times they've physically abused her? It kinda takes away from whatever else you were trying to tell us before.
I get the need and want to just get the backstory over with to show readers just what the characters have been put through, but most of the time, doing that just feels wordy and takes away from good writing.
For instance; in my Mar'inette story, I didn't just tell people right off the bat how horrible Adrien was. I hinted to some of the things he'd done, and presented his actions in flashback chapters(I find it important to limit flashbacks to full sized chapters so that people don't confuse if it's happening at the present when it hops back and forth in the timeline). I took the Adrien salt, and I drew it out over the course story.
Sometimes, it works well with the fic if you put it all into a singular description but most of the times I've seen this, it's kinda turned me off from the fic. "Great! Now I know how horrible these salt characters are; I don't expect anything from them then." If you draw it out longer, then it makes readers more interested to see just how far these characters will go, and let us wonder about redemptions(if you tell me right at the start that they broke Marinette's hand by slamming her locker on it, I'm not going to buy it when it says they looked at her with worry or guilt or possibly wanting to be friends again).
So yeah, I think salt fics are nice, but only when they're written out well. If they squish the salt into a little ball(think of playdough or bread dough) and set it in only a few chapters in giant lumps, it won't look so good. The salt ball needs to be flattened out and spread over the course of the story, you know? I'm not saying the fic has to be centered on the salt, but it should still let it be its own side plot at least, rather than just a character description on peoples personalities and lack of braincells.
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