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abhorredlara · 2 years
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finished dark and now i'm traumatized but also really amazed. from the storyline to soundtrack to filmography, it's just so freaking perfect. but at the end they just vanish into stardust? i really feel like shouting into the void to let out all the frustration but also want to vent to someone about how awesome it is. it's not just a show for me anymore, it's an emotion
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hypogryffin · 6 months
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genuinely curious by what you mean by "jewish (factual)" in your tier list. i can assume for a couple what you mean (sophia as an example) but i dont see how the others could be like jewish-coded! interested in hearing your thoughts
link to the first post for claritys sake, but this is the tier in question:
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ok so for clarification: i made the tier list a little while ago and then scheduled it for later to keep uploads consistent, something i usually do all the time but am not for this discussion for now. this means that by the day the tier list posted, i was already a few weeks or so divorced from the actual creation of it, so some of my opinions have changed (as i said in the og post, i was unsure on a good portion of the characters even when i first queued the list), and some of my reasonings behind placements have been lost to time and my silly little goldfish memory.
bc of this, as of now as im trying to find a distinct line between "jewish (factual)" and "jewish (based on vibes)", the criteria for "factual" is sort of murky. some placements in the category were serious, but a lot of them were also entirely for joking reasons, and i had moved on as soon as i was done laughing to myself without coming back to it.
all this is to say, i have no idea how to summarise it, so im going to explain everything i can remember about my thought process at the time so you can see where i was coming from.
SOPHIA:
yup 👍.
ok so for the uninformed, sophia is the name of a gnostic figure and the specifics change depending on the context of which ur referring to her in, but in judaism specifically sophia was given as a translated name for chokmah which is like a being thats like really important in kabbalah and considered like. this sort of i guess personification of divine wisdom?
anyways this is a concept that i doubt im anywhere near the first person to bring up, so im not gonna spend a lot of time on it like i will the things i havent heard other people talk about. like the whole "good friend of humanity" thing! judaism puts a lot of emphasis on kindness and care for other people and i think its important that thats so big for her character and for how jewish she can be read as. she is also jewish because i like her :^).
TATSUYA:
suffers endlessly because g-d hates *him*, specifically, and he hates g-d right back. jewish.
that was a joke. ok so right out the gate i think the whole "fighting hitler" aspect of IS should count for something during the discussion of which characters are jewish. like just putting that out there. anyways tatsuya is jewish because of eternal punishment. specifically, you know how hes like super into "atonement" and repentance? bro would really have benefited from going to a high holidays service lemme tell you. and he does it in a specific way thats like. his atonement is actively trying to repair what hes fixed right like hes not doing what hes doing to be redeemed, hes doing it because its his responsibility to fix whats been broken. i just idk how to explain it properly but thats a thought process your rabbi talks you through in jew school yknow?
also theres this thing called tikkun olam, which literally translates as "repairing the world". so it means more like. doing ur best as a citizen to improve community and country, or general social work. but just considering it as taking the literal translation, then its just like... yep. that sure is what hes doing isnt it
also, killed hitler. hashtag work
KATSUYA:
placed here mostly because being tatsuyas brother, theyd probably be at a similar "level" of religiosity. however there are some unique things i want to point out here;
katsuya like embodies the idea of "tzedek tzedek tirdof" like. its unfortunate hes a cop but for a cop hes a pretty good person? hes pretty uncompromising on right and wrong, and in a way that totally lines up w tzedek tzedek tirdof as its described in the torah.
extra emphasis on his compassion, as in theres like that core facet of judaism, the tikkun olam, where people have a moral obligation to help others; not just do good as oneself, but also stop other people from doing bad. that last bit doesnt really matter, cuz im bringing it up so i can talk about katsuya as a police officer to clear his dads name and try and ensure a better future for his brother. he gave up his dreams for them.
i mean, when i say "giving up his dreams", im kinda laughing to myself bc theres no way he ran it past his parents bc if he looked his jewish mother in the eye and said "i want to be a pastry chef" he would not make it out of the room alive. hed go "my dream is to become a pâtissier" and his mom would immediately be like "no its not its to be an accountant" and that would be the end of the discussion
also, i think he would make some of the best fucking challah in the world. hed make matzo ball soup that could make you jizz your pants just looking at it. look me in the eyes and tell me that he doesnt actually go nuts at rosh hashana when he gets to make the round challah with the raisins in it and stuff or whatever else. there is such a crystal clear vision in my mind of him rocking this apron my dad used to have that says "real men make latkes". it was pink and ugly as sin and i think it would be katsuyas most prized possession.
LABRYS:
her name is fucking labrys obviously shes a jewish lesbian. next.
/j i will actually talk about this. like not mentioning the only survivor of her upbringing, which isnt a one to one considering the death match portion of her backstory but still close enough to feel um. relavant to jewish culture. she acts very...stereotypically jewish?
its not entirely the accent, but it is...part of it. so like i know its like a new jersey accent and that the stereotype is new york, i guess? but im not american and i dont rlly know the difference. they look close enough to each other on a map tho so i think it counts
but also shes like kinda confrontational in a way i specifically associate with jewish people or jewish characters? like not really bitchy but argumentative right, shes got this really sarcastic or mocking sense of humour. and girl kvetches with the best of them.
(also, side note: since i made the original list, i found out that the voice actress for aegis in p3 reload, dawn m bennett, is actually jewish! if i were to remake the tier list, aegis would be moved up from "vibes" to "factual" because of this. mentioning that here because of the sister thing :).)
JOKER:
kills g-d which is the jewish dream. this is a another joke.
someone in the replies of the tier list said something abt a possible reason being that he has an "abrahamic figure" as his ult. persona, which could be a good point if satanael was actually an abrahamic figure! but it is not. like ok im not a history guy but satanael is a name used in the 2nd book of enoch, which arguably could be part of jewish "canon" (i know this is actually the term for it but fandom has rotted my brain and it sounds terminally online to use it in terms of real life religiosity) but most rabbis agree it like is not, and theyre kind of who im listening to on this, and quick google search says even in christianity, enoch is debatable? idk
so like satanael isnt in the torah. and if anyone says "oh its just like another name for satan so technically--" shut up i know. satan isnt real in the torah either. ok like "satan" is used as a term, but not as like the specific dude that like rules hell. hes just like at most a specific dude who is not a devil/cast from heaven or whatever, but instead is a lawyer. more often its a concept, something representative of like the urge to go against g-ds will or a kosher life, this "evil inclination" which everyone is born possessing and grapples with when trying to be a good person. NOT THE SAME AS THE CHRISTIAN SATAN. WHICH IS WHAT P5 WAS GOING FOR. SATAN IN JUDAISM IS NOT A "super demon lord" or whatever they call it in the text of the game
satanael isnt an abrahamic figure and i dont think satan is either cuz its so different between religions and honestly i think calling things abrahamic religions, at least w the context i hear of it, is like kind of a misnomer or just kind of generally misleading cuz judaism christianity and islam are all so different and if were talking about this i think whoever invented the term judeochristian should eat a sheet of glass for it because whenever i hear those terms its very clear the person saying it means just christianity but theyre trying to be inclusive without actually putting the work in and thats not the point of this.
ok if im honest, as i think abt it joker isnt like. really... super jewish, in a way that you can point out? its just like... this overall vibe im having trouble explaining which is probably also like super influenced by how much i like him. i want to say that this strict sense of right and wrong that remains uninfluenced by the rest of society is something that clearly creates or maybe just intensifies this like. empathy for other people that reminds me of this concept in judaism which i cant remember the hebrew name of rn but i think its most commonly translated to english as "lovingkindness", one word? or that the whole idea of the phantom thieves can be contributed to tikkun olam. but, on the other hand, even if lovingkindness is what i personally consider one of jokers core character traits, the other one is pure, blinding rage.
im not going to go super into it, because im a few years rusty of torah study bc its only really consistently done in my community for kids preparing for bnai mitzvah cuz of how few people we have in our congregation. but from what i remember, my interpretation of the exact limit between righteous and sinful anger is a bit more... lax than the average jew's, or at least the average rabbi's, meaning mine, lol. either way anger is almost always seen as sinful because its an emotion that can like. turn you from g-d, its the same thing that invokes that "evil inclination" we just talked abt. so, joker textually feels this rage that arsene, his other self, literally refers to as "sacrilegious", something that very clearly states that he is willing to *knowingly* commit sins for this rage and is perfectly capable of causing undue harm to others for it, which is exactly the reason why judaism warns of anger. this means jokers anger is distinctly against jewish teachings.
again, im really lax, my familys reform (/lh) and i think there are some parts of this characterisation that make me feel this rage is overall constructive, especially considering that is what feeds his constant practice of lovingkindness and tikkun olam, but it being such a huge facet of his personality (made worse bc as a silent protagonist, you really have to search to get away from this trait) brings him down on the Jew Scale(tm).
in short, now that im really discussing this id probably move him to incredibly jewish based on vibes or even to just "jewish" no further classification. but even w the undying sinful anger thing i cant not think of him as jewish and i dont think its just bc hes one of my favourite characters of all time.
also that hair texture looking really familiar is all🤔🤔. all im saying that is in the tutorial, instead of "frizzy hair", morgana deffo should have been calling them blondie and jewfro /j /j /j
EDIT AND JOKERS KITCHEN!! JOKERS KITCHEN!! FOOD AS A LOVE LANGUAGE!! IN P5 YOU MAKE FOOD FOR YOUR FRIENDS AND YOU PUT LOVE INTO IT
MORGANA:
i know i put morgana before joker in the tier but i think in order to rlly discuss morgana we needed joker first bc part of my reason for putting them in the same tier is because they really are a pair, do not separate.
anyways, morgana does have a lot of the same problems as joker when it comes to being difficult to pin down. his inclination to tikkun olam is similar, sort of even greater than jokers depending on personal characterisation of joker, but instead of this discrepancy of his jewishness being anger, the ethical conundrum with morgana is sort of. arrogance? like, i have trouble figuring out how to really put into words how i feel abt morganas "lovingkindness", because it is so hard to understand where hes at in terms of empathy?? like. fucking. idk hes definitely a very caring person but its not exactly like
ok i cant figure out how to say it moving on. i used the word arrogance even though i dont really think thats right, because morgana has never seemed haughty. his "arrogance" is really just him making up for an inferiority complex caused by the amnesia thing, its not as if he genuinely totally believes himself to be above the others. but like no matter what it stems from, the way he behaves and his personal pride hurts people. ie the okumura arc, or his entire relationship w ryuuji. he speaks ill of others, belittles them to bring himself up, etc. arrogance and excess pride is as condemned as anger in judaism if not moreso, since its even less useful/constructive to be "arrogant" than it is to be angry. OH ok so what i meant with the hard to figure out his empathy thing is this actually!! hes very caring and has a really notable respect for human life but its always at war with his need to prove himself, so even if when you think about it its like Oh Morgana Is A Really Caring Person, which makes sense because he was created from human desire and as such is really in touch with what people need, the desperation he has to be seen as "worthy" comes off as wanting to be seen as "above", even if it means trying to get the people around him as being considered "below" him.
tldr so if it was just those two traits i think id have to move morgana lower on the list, alongside joker.
HOWEVER. speaking directly to the other jews in the crowd, but morgana is totally textually a golem, right? like not exactly, obviously, but think about it. morganas a being of the velvet room because he was created from "the dregs of human hope" (canonical line from yaldaboath that i think about more than what can be considered healthy tbh), whose job is was and always will be to protect and guide the trickster and his community, the phantom thieves. hes a golem right? am i insane? am i seeing things? i dont care, im not giving up on this interpretation, so morgana is factually and canonically jewish cuz of it.
ZEN:
i do not remember.
as of today id probably move him to either jewish no other classification or not jewish. my b guys. anyways
JUN:
life is indescribable torment, and then hes also got additional, mostly unrelated, mommy issues. judaism 101.
also his suspenders when he was a kid are the most young jewish lad shit in the history of ever like i have seen that exact outfit on a young boy every time i go to temple, and each time it is a different kid
ok more seriously, i really do think juns story-- specifically his relationship with memory-- can easily be extracted into a jewish narrative. like nyarlathotep messed with his memories and convinced him that the other members of the masked circle killed maya right. and so the way he fanatically reminded himself of the past was a mix of trauma and active manipulation. but if i think abt it a certain way i also can see it as like. ok so in judaism memory is really important and like a lot of the time during for example passover, youre meant to refer to yourself as being a jew in egypt, saying "we" instead of "them" and such. but im specifically meaning how important memory/remembrance is in grieving. jun in his grief for mayas perceived death "kept her alive" in a way. she was never forgotten, and so she never died. even though the entire masked circle forgot, from trauma or fear or guilt or whatever, jun held on, remembering her, and so she survived. joker took peoples dreams but his actions also caused them to be completely be forgotten. they were alive, but they were robbed of their ability to be remembered at all, and so they were as good as dead even still breathing and talking.
retroactively, this idea enforces tatsuyas jewishness, considering the entire story of eternal punishment. he refused to forget the masked circle, even though it hurts.
anyways back to jun, i also think the whole repentance thing is important too. he hurt people in his anger and sorrow and spends the rest of his life (until the world is reset at least lol) atoning for his wrongdoings.
also, i know i said kid him is super jewish looking, but he has not gotten better as hes grown up. 17y.o him is exactly the guy your bubbe will pull up on facebook and be like "this is the grandson of my friend or whoever! you should go on a date with him, hes your age! he looks a bit gay but hes a very successful doctor! ...and hes JEWISH YAKNOW...." and ur like "ok bubbe"
ERIKO:
i actually do not recall exactly why she is in this tier specifically. the only thing i for sure remember was that i at least partially placed her here bc of her fascination with the occult.
HIKARI:
ok this one was kinda me goofing. its the whole extended family thing like whats more jewish than being actively discouraged from a creative career for something "safe" and "normal?" bro the aunt might as well have dropped the "being a doctor is very respectable" line in the song.
but like even without that, wanting to be a director or associated with film? hitting her with the jew beam. mazel tov babygirl.
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sn4pozu · 11 months
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how Richard Trager uses Instagram (yes, he would use Instagram):
this is Pre-Engine Rick because realistically post-engine Rick would have other things to worry about besides instagram
30 stories a day, from dawn till dawn again this man is addicted to the layout
doesn't use stickers because hes a grown man BUT HE DOES HAVE A BITMOJI THAT HE USES RELIGIOUSLY
its half office reels, half food pics, and a quarter just rants
overuses tags to hell, even randomly mid sentence , example: "#Amazing day today at @MurkoffOfficial ! this #Work ain't doin itself 📋💻👍🏻 #Workday #Monday #Officeday #ADayInMyLife #Job"
sometimes thinks that Murkoff should totally have a social media account, he knows its dumb but he cant help wanting more followers 😔
"Suns out guns out! #Sunday with my bud @JeremyBlaireOfficial" and its a picture of them in a golf cart holding champagne (not gay, just besties)
Not to sneak in my RickJer agenda but in my minds eye they signed eachothers golf clubs
tags the location if he could he would
username is something obnoxious like 'RichardTragerOfficial' like nobody know u lil bro 😭😭😭
buys likes and followers to feed his ego
4k followers thats like 85% bots
" @McDonaldsOffical Never fails 😂😂😂 #hangovermeal #NoRegrets" and its a fish fillet with the most inhuman bite you've ever seen taken out of it
WOULD POST A SWEATY GYM MAT AND TAG THE GYM AND IT'D HAVE A DUMB CAPTION LIKE "Workout Wednesdays! 🏋🏼‍♂️💪#Wednesday #Gym #Exercise #GymPic #Muscles" HE LACKS SELF AWARENESS DONT LAUGH
would 'ironically' comment "Hot! 🔥🔥🔥" on a mans gym pic and would slutshame a womans gym butt pic
"he hurts every woman hes ever met because his true soulmate is a man" - Sock-rates
he would unironically use hashtags in a sentence for fun, also urges Jer to be more active on Instagram
imagine the most white grown man, now add curly blonde hair, uhuh now give him a gay sweater, now make him homophobic & gay, yep .thats him officer
HAS gotten scammed on instagram, he threathened legal action and got his money back and deleted their account after a week tho
weekday streaks exist to him, no hes not a middle schooler hes actually 30
look at me in the eyes and tell me he wouldn't make fun of feminism in the comments section of those LibzDunked accounts
his Close Friends stories are just aftermaths after nights out, its either him drunk posting or filming himself talking to the camera about his hangover
its just Jer and a few other friends but it has the same intimacy of homosexuality
theres one video where hes drunk and actually tripped and fell so comically its been 7 months and Jer still makes fun of him for it (laughs along but actually hates it like viscerally)
he has 3 phones, both iphones and one is a samsung flip (he wanted the hype), a work phone, home phone, and his normal phone, why does he need so much? why is he not robbed yet? we will never know....
replies to those awareness posts about war in the middle east and goes like "damn.. thats unfortunate 💔 hearts goes out to them 🙏 @Chriswalker89"
most menacing instagram white man, cyberbullies as a past time and has 5 alts just focused on Harrassment+ Stalking people
he'd doxx which hospital your mother is staying in with no shame
"If you don't take that back I'm injecting your mothers spine with brain eating parasites" and he means that for real
would post corny atheist memes & misinformation
induces paranoia as a hobby "Yes ma'am i am a licensed doctor vaccines Do cause autism" as a treat
he fucks around too much one day his main gets suspended and he calls Instagram customer services
if you wouldn't think he'd try to hook up with an instagram influencer you are a liar
weekly self-help book recommendations that he doesn't read and actually just gets payed 7$ per link
im not saying he would make an alt to just hype up his own photos but he would.....do that.....
also gets blackmailed his own dick pic but whatever that was in the past
on a side note Jeremy does have a year old instagram account that only has 2 pictures (both just bar pics of him posing with a glass of wine like an idiot) and his entire Tagged section is just RICHARD TAGGING HIM IN ANYTHING
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bychertryntheater · 1 year
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The long introduction to this blog.
Well, i "accidentally" started reading books this year. It just kinda happened. Watching YT all evening got more and more boring. I need something more productive! Have a look at my friend, reading book after book. How do they do it? Wait, wasn't there a fantasy/romance by a content creator i follow for years and got into writing recently?
So this year in march I purchased the german funtasy romance Mona. Even read the whole 400ish pages. Took me about 2 months but I was proud. Finally a finished book!
So i went through my pile of shame and found the german edition of Good Omens. I bought it when the "TV" adoption came out, but didn't get the hang of it. The second attempt took me just two or three weeks.
In about a week I reread the german satire Qualityland and the sequel Qualityland 2.0. After that I pushed myself through Babylon Berlin, (Der nasse Fisch) a crime novel set in 1920s Berlin.
Dipped my toe into Warrior Cats! Yep I started this massive clusterfuck. No i won't learn the English names of the cats. The german ones confused me enough.
After that I read my favourite book of the year, which was the first one in english since school: Loveless. I. LOVE. THIS. BOOK. Big fucking mood. Thats me. Im Ace too! I relate to her! Yes girl, let's go!!!
Also the second part in the Mona trilogy. Cant wait for the final book! More fantasy? What about Talus Part 2 and Part 1. Yep, I read them out of order. We should do this more often.
Does anyone know about Fabian - The story of a moralist by Erich Kästner? I googled if theres an english version, which exists, but does anyone read this book if they're not in german high school? Its really scary how relevant it still is.
Now its December 2022 and I am reading book number 12. And somehow it is Shakespeare. Romeo and Juliet. Good Lord. What happened???
Big part of next year will be reading Priory of the orange tree. Im scared. 800 pages are a very high number for me. And i bought the original english version. Could take me at least 3 hard and long month to finsh.
If you're still with me, why do i start another book blog? I already do this on the light blue hell site! But more for myself (and friends who dont mute my hashtag i chose for it). But here i can do better shitpost, have more than 240 letters for rants AND can force me to write more in english. Yes, as i indirect stated and you already guessed it from the poor english and unfamiliar book titles, im from germany. But this blog should still work, even if theres no english version for some german books.
So, let's have some fun!
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wanderinglostpuppet · 4 years
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My mom finally getting bread with no milk in it is literally the best thing to happen to me in like two weeks guys I think I need a hug
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oh-for-fic-sake · 3 years
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Fearfull Proposal
Summary: henry plans a romantic proposal... and instead of coming clean about your secret fear of heights and ruining his romantic plan, you put on a brave face... well until your nearing the top of the london eye.
Warnings: fear, fluff, swearing, typos.
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You quivered as you rose higher and higher over londons skyline.
Fuck why? Why the fuck had you got in this dangling glass death trap. A faulty few bolts and you'd be plummeting into the fucking thames!
Henry was standing by the window looking out at the glittering lights in awe.
You were standing with your back turned to the houses of Parliament hands clutching the rail eitherside of you knuckles white. Knees knocking.
God this was the stupidest thing you'd ever fucking done! And it was your own fault.
"Babe, look! God big ben looks soo small never been on this at night"
You hummed nodding but continued looking to the floor.
Henry paused when you didnt correct him with the whole 'big ben is the bell' you usually countered
He turned looking back to you and his stomach dropped.
"Babe? Whoa are you okay there love?" He asked frowning as he saw your eyes clenched shut almost as if you were in pain.
You were trembling and pale to the point he fearded youd pass out.
"Here come sit down and relax, i packed some snacks-" he said placing the specially packed bag of snacks and screw top mini wine bottles.
"No! No I'm fine... I will just stay here... By the saftey bar" you said giggling nervously sparing him a glance and patting the metal you were holding onto for dear life..
Henry faltered and really took in your apperance unsure what to do. It wasn't like he could get you off, you had to ride the ride.
"Babe? Are you scared of heights?"
"Nooo dont be sillyeee- OH MY GOD IM GONNA FUCKING DIE!" you began laughing him off then screamed as the ride stopped.
Instantly you ducked crouching whilst wrapping your arms around the silver bar shouting bloody murder.
It didn't help you were bathed in purple light so couldn't see shit.
Henry got up and rushed to you standing over you arms rounding you holding you securly.
"No, no its fine love... shh its fine baby, they said it could stop to let people on poppet remember?" He said quickly rubbing your sides as you cowered trying to fend off the temptation to look at the thames below.
"Y-yeah fuck hen- im sorry i just..." you mewled turning towards him tucking your head to his chest.
"Scared of heights huh? Why didnt you tell me?" He sighed pressing kisses to your head as you whimpered adn the ride began moving once again.
"Because you went to all this trouble, you planned this surprise and i didnt want to ruin it, you were soo excited" you sniffled blinking at him.
"Hey shh you silly girl, you should have told me. You wouldnt have ruined anything you silly sausage" he cooed winding himself around you tighter.
He was actually annoyed at himself, how the fuck had he not known his girlfriend of a year and a half was scared of heights?
He'd suspected a fear of heights when you both went on holiday for your birthday, but youd managed to convince him it was a fear of flying and planes... not heights.
And come to think of it you didnt even like the glass lifts in shopping centers, you ran to the corner and held on eyes locked onto the doors the entire time.
So this was the worst surprize he could of planned for tonight. Things weren't going to plan. Fuck.
"Babe im sorry" he apologised feeling like an asshole.
"No no dont be, this was extremly sweet bear" you said quickly not wantin to make him feel bad fpr your own short commings.
"Theres noting sweet about terrifying you"
"Do... do you want to sit down? Ill hold you the entire time" he offered peaking to the central bench where both your bags sat.
"I.. yes okay i think sitting will be better" you said then yipped as he prompty scooped you up and placed you in his lap securly.
"Im so sorry love, I just wanted to make this special and romantic" he muttered holding you as close as he could letting you know that you were safe and sound.
"It is! It is love really im just a baby" you said quickly grasping his face pulling him closer before peppering his face with kisses.
"Your not a babe we all have our fears" he said quietly pressing his forehead to yours.
"You dont" you sighed closing your eyes trying to ignore the snails pace of the pod that still rose over london.
You could barely feel it, but your fear amplified it.
"Oh but i do~" he replied peering at you, as yur eyes fluttered open.
"Like what?" The questionnescaped before you could think.
"No" he said eyes now becoming worried, anxiety clouding them.
"No?"
"Yes, at the moment thats my biggest fear" he said releasing a shakey breath as you frowned at him not following but didnt dwell as your ees darted to the side seeing the houses
"You see, i was trying to be all romantic and wait untill we got tp the top, but i think you'll be too terrified"
"Henry?" You said leaning back unsure about the serious tone he seemed to take.
"I brought us here, to the spot we met two years ago today..." he said drawing deeper breaths as the reality of what was about to happen hit him.
"Was it really?" You asked surprized he'd remember something like that. Anniversary? Definitely. But the day you first met? And asked for a selfie with a series of embarrassing squeaks? No you didnt think he'd remember.
"Yep. I remember doing a promo and shoot on this thing, then got off and was sat next to you in wagamama"
"And i squeaked for a selfie" you groaned with a small giggle.
"Im glad you did, i scanned instagram for days after- scouring my hashtag trying to find you... i kicked myself for not getting your number~"
"I still cant belive you did that... but im gld you did henry"
"Who'd have thought the nervous little thing trying not to even breath in my direction would be my girlfriend six months down the line"
"Or that we'd last this long?" You quipped at him trying to reme,ber to breath.
"And.. hopefully a lifetime? Despite me dragging you intoyour actual living nightmare- which i promise to never do again! Not even lifts"
You scowled and tilted your head to him not sure if you heard him correctly.
Untill he pulled the small velvet box from his pocket.
"Henry?! What? You cant be serious?"
"Oh but i am love, as much as i want to do this right and drop to one knee i doubt you'll thank me for releasing you?"
"Dont you dare let me go!"
"I think you'll find im trying to do the opposite~" he chuckled opening the box revealing the simple elegant ring three tiny diamonds.
"Im trying to marry you..."
You gasped eyes glazing over as you locked on to the dainty ring pinched between his fingers.
"I love you y/n, and i want to know if you'd become my wife and share your life with me. Will you marry me?"
"Oh god yes of course its a yes henry i love you bear!" You cried throwing your arms around him making him grunt and quickly clench his fist arohnd the ring before he dropped it.
He groaned into you rocking from side to side littering your head with kisses before peeling you away to sit the ring on your finger.
You looked at the glittering stones on your finger weeping. You may have been cursing yourself for getting into this godforsaken glass bauble in the sky.
But now you were he happiest woman alive.
"I love you bear"
"I love you too"
"Would you like some wine? I brough the little cute bottles you like" he offered nodding to the bag of snacks.
"Err lets not push it hun" you whined not sure wine at this altitude was a good idea.
You kept glancing at him still sniffing and giggleing unable to look from your ring for long.
"Gotcha, no wine"
"You look surprized i said yes?"you quipped needing to talk and take your mind off the fact your at the tippity top.
"I made you face one of your nightmares i thought you'd slap me silly when i ask" he scoffed pressing a kiss to your cheek unable to stop.
"Never love... but please never ever get on this thing again okay?" You pleaded fluttering your lashes at him pleading.
"I swear. Never again, but seeing as this is our one and only ride we should take a few selfies? Mark the occasion?" He said standing letting your feet hit the floor but never once did he let go.
"Absolutly, gotta show off my new fiancé" you hummed rising to share another kiss with him not really paying attention to the height you'd now reached, you had more important things to think about. Like sharing the rest of your life with this glorious man.
"My thoughts exactly" he grinned pulling out his phone aiming it at the two of you, makeing sure to have the hand that rested on his chest donning his ring in shot.
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Text
So yeah dis is my blog I guess. As you can tell by my title header. Yes I am a witch. More of a witchling right now. Since in about a week it will officially be a year since I first gotten into my craft. And if you are wondering I lean more to celtic wicca and some folk wicca.
That aside on to the fun part. And explain other random stuff about me you will mostly see on here.
- I kin with gremlins and raccoons. (I am not like one of those crazy other kin peeps trust me. I just really l connect with them XDD) So yes, I am and will post a lot of Gremlin/Cottagecore esque aesthetic or pictures of things I collect or have.
-And yes since I am a witch there will be some witchy aesthetic posts and stuff.
- I love animals obviously. I have a dog and two guinea pigs. As well as a pet rock who I will show later in a bit. (Dont have a name yet XD)
- I am a artist and writer. I have a pay pal and stuff. And will make a post later on that. If you want a commission or something.
- I am bi
- For music I love anything really except for most pop and country. So pretty much anything Bon Iver to Oliver Tree to Cavetown to Melanie Martinez to TNBH to Juice Wrld to Marilyn Manson....yep. (If theres a specific one you want to know or compare music just ask)
- And thats about it really. So if want to know more just ask. I am usually bored as hell and never too busy. So if you want to chat or message me dont be shy too. 👌
- Also there will be memes or the occasional random post so yeah. Small fyi.
🌿Blessed be and have a good day/night🌿
Also I know that its not good to use the goblincore hashtag like that. But I am just using it out spreading this around since not many know really of the hashtag/name change. A lot of people are still calling it goblincore everywhere else. And just want to be sure they reach here too.
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Madelaine Petsch//Awkward Encounters
Request: madelaine hooks up with reader during a party, it’s only months later that she finds out reader is an actress that will be playing cheryl’s ex girlfriend heather. it’s kinda akward at first, but soon the fans can see that something might be going on between them because of how intense their scenes together are, and after a scene where heather kisses cheryl reader kisses madelaine and they hook up again
“Madelaine! Thank you for coming in early!” A crew member said enthusiastically. 
“No problem!” She replied. “What exactly am I here for though?” 
“We’ve found Heather and we need you to do a read-through with her so we can figure some stuff out and make sure there is enough chemistry between you so its believable.” They explained and Madelaine nodded. “So here’s your script for the first episode she’s in, and your reading the bit thats been highlighted.” 
“Got it.” She nodded. 
“She’s in there. Good luck.” They gave her a thumbs up and she laughed before entering the small room. She smiled brightly as she walked in, but as soon as she saw who was playing Heather her smile dropped. 
“Hi. I’m- Madelaine?” You asked shocked. 
“Hi Y/n.” She waved awkwardly. 
“You two know each other?” A director asked and you both nodded slowly. 
“We met at a party a few months ago.” You explained and they nodded. 
“Thats good. So you should already have a bit of chemistry together!” 
“More than a bit from what I can remember.” You mumbled and Madelaine’s eyes widened, a slight blush appearing on her cheeks. 
“So! Shall we start?” The director asked and you both nodded. “Madelaine, you start.” He smiled reassuringly at her and she nodded before you turned to face each other. 
“Heather? What are you doing back? I haven’t seen you for years.” She asked, a mixture of confusion, hurt and anger. 
“I came back for you. I missed you, and I heard your evil mother was no longer in the picture.” You replied and walked towards her. 
“She isn’t. But that doesn’t mean you get to come back and everything will be like they used to be.” She replied and took a step back from you. 
“But Cheryl.” You reached out to her, but she pulled away from you. 
“Sorry Heather.” She said sadly, before looking at the directors and producers. 
“That was great!” They smiled. “Your first scene’s together are to be filmed on Monday! So Y/n, you can have the weekend off, and Madelaine, you’re needed all day.” 
“Thank you.” You smiled gratefully at them and they nodded. Madelaine smiled at them before walking out the room, you followed after her. “Madelaine?” You asked and she turned around. “Do you think we should talk about what happened at that party, seeing as though we’re co-stars now, who will have a lot of scenes together.” 
“Maybe later.” She shrugged. “I have to get to set.” 
“Oh.” You mumbled and Madelaine walked away from you. “Well, this isn’t going to be awkward.” You muttered before walking the other way. 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Your first episode had been aired and the fans were going crazy. In the episode you had a few more scenes together which were incredibly difficult to film, however you didn’t think it showed when you watched it back. 
“You were great Y/n!” Vanessa hugged you once the episode had finished. All of the cast decided they were going to hang out and watch it seeing as though it was the first episode you were in and it was a tradition among the cast. 
“Thank you.” You smiled and hugged her back.
“It was brilliant. Well done.” Jordan congratulated you and you smiled brightly at him. You and Madelaine were sitting on opposite sides of the living room much to everyone’s amusement. They were at the party where you met. 
It was a Tuesday night and KJ had been invited to a friend of a friends party, meaning he invited the majority of the cast. You had been there for the same reason, a friend of a friend. Once you arrived you noticed a few people who looked familiar, you just couldn’t figure out where from. They were dancing awfully which made you giggle, your eyes looked to the side of them where a red headed girl was laughing at them, she looked at you and smiled. A few hours later she made her way over to you and you started to chat (mainly flirt) and the next thing you knew you were waking up the next day in your bed, to an empty pace beside you and a note explaining that she had to leave. It wasn’t until she walked through the door of the read-through that you figured out where you knew her and her friends from, and by then it was too later. 
Of course the cast thought this was hilarious as they remember you two leaving the party in a hurry, and then Madelaine coming to work in the same clothes the next day. So as you can imagine when they saw you on your first day they were highly entertained for the rest of the day (more like up until this moment).
They had tried to encourage you to talk to each other about it but neither of you were having any of it. 
“Have you been on twitter?” Camila asked and you shook your head. “You might want to.” She mumbled. “You too Mads.” She said and Madelaine looked at her confused before going on her phone. You also went on Twitter and gasped when you went on the Riverdale hashtag. 
“They all think something went on between us.” You mumbled. 
“Or that something is going on between us.” Madelaine added and you heard your friends snicker. 
“Great.” You sighed. 
“Its cute.” Lili tried to cheer you both up. “It just means your acting was amazing. Which it was.” 
“Or they could just sense the sexual tension through the tv screens.” Charles muttered and Cami hit his chest lightly, although she was trying to contain a laugh. 
“Shut up.” Madelaine rolled her eyes. “What happened is in the past.” She added and you sighed, quickly averting your eyes back to your phone. 
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Cheryl, I promise you I never stopped loving you. I have thought of you every single day since the day I left, and every single night I have dreamed of a life with you. A one where we’re happy and in love, we have a cute little house together, that you have insisted on painting red, inside and out. We come home every single day to each other and hold each other, we watch TV and read, we dance in the living room at 3am, we laugh, making memories, we cry and support each other. We get a few cats or dogs, whatever you want, maybe start a family if thats what we both want and we just make up for lost time. Cheryl Blossom, I am so undeniably in love with you and that will never change, no matter where I am or how long I’m away for.” You said, tears falling down your face. She looked at you, tears in her own eyes and smiled. You gently cupped her cheek and pulled her towards you, connecting your lips, the kiss was slow at first, but like the script instructed it started to get more heated, ending with you on top of her. 
“Cut!” The director yell, and you both pull apart. “That was great girls! Its a wrap for today. We’ll see you tomorrow!” They added and you climbed off Madelaine. 
“I err. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Madelaine said awkwardly and stood up. 
“Yep.” You replied, also standing up. 
“Bye.” She said quickly before leaving the set. 
“Yep!” You called after her, before going the opposite way. 
A few hours had passed and Madelaine couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss, and the time you hooked up and just you in general. She thought she could be able to handle working with you but apparently she was wrong, what started out as ‘yeah, you’re cute and we hooked up one time at party which was fun but now its kinda awkward’, had now turned into ‘I am utterly and completely in love with you and now I don’t know what to do with myself’, which was a slight problem to say the least. The doorbell rang and she sighed aggressively, checking her phone as she went to answer it. 
“Who is coming round at this time?” She mumbled to herself. The doorbell rang more aggressively and she huffed. “I’m coming! Calm down!” She shouted before swinging the door open. Usually she was more careful when answering the door late at night but she was annoyed and confused as to what to do about you. “Yes?” She asked aggressively as she opened the door. “Y/n? What are you doing here?” 
“I meant every single word.” You stated anxiously. 
“Huh?” She asked confused. 
“I meant everything I said when we were filming. Madelaine Petsch, I am so in love with you, you have no idea and I feel like if I don’t say it now then I never will and I’ll always wonder what if so I thought it would be better for everyone if I tell you. But literally Heathers speech to Cheryl, was what I feel for you.” You rambled and she looked at you shocked. “I’m taking the silence as ‘I don’t feel the same way’, so that is noted, I respect that. I’ll leave you alone. I mean until we see each other tomorrow at work. Then its gonna be a bit difficult to leave you alone, we literally play ex girlfriends turned girlfriends again. God that is going to be so awkwa-” 
“Kiss me.” She said. 
“Huh?” 
“Kiss me.” 
“Er. Okay?” You replied confused, before leaning in. Your hands went to her hips and you pulled her closer to you. You kissed her sweetly, almost hesitantly but once she wrapped her arms around your neck and pulled you closer to her you weren’t holding back, and neither was she. 
“Do you wanna come in?” She asked breathlessly. 
“There’s nothing I want more.” You nodded and she smiled before pulling you into her apartment and slamming the door. As Madelaine woke up the next day, with the sun shining in through the blinds and your arms wrapped around her. She smiled, knowing this was what she were meant to do, when she met you at that random party, on a Tuesday night. 
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amaralanegra · 5 years
Text
Into the Abyss (and back into you)
ao3 link
Chapter 1:  First Day
Pairings: A LOT
Warnings: none atm
Summary: After being rescued, child soldier survivor Bucky Barnes tries his hardest to have a normal, ordinary high school life despite the terrors that still haunt him. One day, he receives an email that he thought would never come -- the private investigator he had hired found his mother. He has to make a plan and act quick if he doesn't want to lose her again. Sam Wilson, aspiring therapist, loves his family and his friends. After his best friend Bucky cuts off communication from their friend group, his sister goes missing. A hashtag, a social media movement, a nationwide search. But there's no trace of her. After finishing high school, Bucky contacts him once more, telling him that he knows where to find his sister. With the help of his friends, they all travel throughout the United States to find Sam's sister and Bucky's mother. And perhaps love in the way, too.
A/N: DONT FORGET TO LIKE COMMENT AND SUBSCRIBE
Steve♢ is online
Erik ( ಠ ಠ) is online
Bucky ( ˘-___-) is online
Sammy is online
 Steve ♢: first day of school o(*^▽^*)o
Steve ♢: you guys excited?
Erik ( ಠ ಠ): of course
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): i cant wait to finally step into that hellhole we call school
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): and die.
Bucky ( ˘-__-): ^
Sammy: facts
Steve ♢: you guys…
Steve ♢: we only have this year together!
Steve ♢: we gotta enjoy it!
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): oh ill enjoy it alright
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): im always happy whenever i get home from school u know
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): its a good change from the crippling depression i feel whenever i step into those shitty gates of hell
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): did i also mention i get diabetes type fuck-school whenever i enter school
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): its life-threatening steve
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): i could die
Sammy: tick tock then bitch
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): shut up sam
Steve ♢: come ooooon
Steve ♢: you'll be ok! You have me, Sam and Bucky!
Steve ♢: i honestly think this year will be great! Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): yeah
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): i hope so too
Sammy: Alright Steve we'll see you at school
Sammy: I’m about to start driving now
Steve ♢: ok, see you guys! Bucky ( ˘-___-): Oh hey btw
Bucky ( ˘-___-): Don't forget to eat
Bucky ( ˘-___-): You always skip breakfast...
Bucky ( ˘-___-): At least drink orange juice
Bucky ( ˘-___-): That should help a bit
Steve ♢: yep!
Steve ♢: i won’t forget (。・ω・。)ノ
Bucky ( ˘-___-): Good!
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): gay
Bucky ( ˘-___-): I meant that in the most heterosexual way possible
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): when do you ever
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): remember that time you pulled down Steve’s pants while we were at the pool high af
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): because i do
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): and his ass...
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): it haunts me
Steve ♢: i tend to have that effect on people.
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): i haven’t been able to sleep since then Steve
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): you monster
Bucky ( ˘-___-): Erik hurry up we’re already waiting outside
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): dont you fucking try to change the subject
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): remember that time you pole danced and strip teased when you were drunk out of your mind
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): because i do
Steve ♢: but that happened last month
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): and yet it feels like an eternity
Bucky ( ˘-___-): Why can’t you guys forget the embarrassing shit I do for like once in your lives.
Sammy: cuz it was fucking hilarious thats why LMFAO I think I still have those polaroid pics somewhere
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): n cuz that’s what friends do
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): and apparently for you friendship is also traumatizing me with steves bare ass and your slutty pole dancing
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): i’ve had night terrors ever since
Steve ♢: lol
Bucky ( ˘-___-): Erik. hurry up. before I go in there. and beat you. in the face and ass.
Bucky ( ˘-___-): We’re already late. Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): aw
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): come on you know that my hair takes long
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): shit i should be a model for l'oreal
Sammy: we’re leaving
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): okokokok im going out
Steve ♢: lol be careful
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): we will try
Bucky ( ˘-___-): See you Steve!
Steve ♢: byeee
 Steve ♢ is offline
Bucky ( ˘-___-) is offline
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ) is offline
Sammy is offline
 “About time,” Bucky says as he reclines in his seat and pulls down his beanie with a huff, almost fully covering his eyebrows. Sam looks at the backseat through the rearview mirror as Erik lazily opens the door and sits on the middle of the backseat with a groan, his black hoodie still pulled up and hiding half his face.
“Sorry.” Erik says, sounding annoyed and not sorry at all. Both boys can hear the loud trap music coming from one bud of his gold earphones while the other hangs low down his neck. He leans back and closes his eyes, already looking drained of energy before the day even starts. “There was a problem.”
Sam starts his car while keeping both of his hands on the steering wheel, “What happened?” he asks.
“Is Valentina okay?” Bucky also asks, peeking at him over his shoulder.
Erik rolls his eyes at him. “The goddamn cat is fine.” He sighs and sinks further into his seat. “Nah. Do y'all remember my cousin?” Erik taps Bucky’s shoulder to make him fully turn around, as though he wants him to see the pain in his eyes as he speaks. “The one in Wakanda? Annoying, quiet, and thinks he’s better than everybody else?”
Bucky wrinkles his nose in confusion and looks to the side as he tries to remember, but comes up empty. He shrugs.
“Ah,” Sam says, nodding. “Yes, I remember you fondly telling us about him.”
“Well,” Erik says, putting extra emphasis on the word by rolling his eyes once again. “He moved here. Has been at my house all summer. And I have to share my room with him.”
Bucky nods in silent understanding and Sam keeps driving in silence, expecting Erik to continue talking about how his life is full of struggles. But instead Erik sits there with his arms crossed, his eyebrows knitted together and his lips forming a pout like a child. Bucky would call him cute, but starting his morning with a black eye isn’t on his to-do list.
“And um,” Bucky starts, uncertainty in his voice. “That's it?”
“That is it.” Erik scoffs, sliding further into his seat. “I don't want to share my room with him. Shit, I don't want to share it with anyone! Both him and my little cousin, Shuri, are here. They are filthy fucking rich, I don’t get why they gotta live with us.”
Bucky frowns and nods, trying to understand his unique situation. Sam instead feels the need to nervously scratch the back of his neck, but he doesn't want to let go of the steering wheel thanks to his road anxiety preventing him from even looking away. They know that Erik’s mom has been in a… feud of sorts with Erik’s paternal uncle. Erik wasn’t too specific of course, but they remember it made him upset enough to cry. And while they know he’s a soft guy under all the tough facade he puts on – he can’t say he doesn’t cry when watching the pet adoption commercials (“they are all alone, and sad, and the music doesn’t help, you assholes! Stop laughing!”) or that he doesn’t sing his heart out to the opening of his favorite anime – they also know that Erik loves his father, and he loves his mother, but one of them is gone and he has been too overprotective over the only one left. Erik’s hatred for his uncle has not stopped growing since that fight with his mom.
Remembering this, both boys feel an ache in their chest for their friend, wanting nothing more but to make him smile again.
Bucky is not much of a touchy person, so when he stretches to place his hand on Erik’s knee and shakes it in silent comfort, it doesn’t go overlooked. Erik smiles at him, and when he looks to the side of Bucky he sees Sam looking at him intensely.
“What?” He spats out on impulse under the sharp scrutiny.
Sam blinks once, twice, and finally he speaks. “You’re a better person than that old man is, you know.” He slowly says in that therapeutic, soothing voice of his, causing Erik to pause. “You’re a better person than your cousin, who didn’t stand up for you or your dad. You're kind, and you care so much. You— you're not afraid to fight for what's right. You’re way better than them, Erik, don’t you forget that, okay?”
Looking at him with wide eyes, Erik then slowly smiles, thankful for his best friend’s words. It might not fix it all, but it helps, even if just a little bit. He will be caught dead before he ever admits that, though, so instead he says ‘that’s kinda gay’ and laughs when Sam tells him to get the hell out of his car.
“We're here anyways!” He yells out, laughter still present in his voice.
Sam frantically locks his car and rushes to catch up with Erik and Bucky as both argue excitedly about an anime episode that streamed the night before. “Can one of y’all speak English, please?” He pushes them apart to be in the middle of them. “Or Patwah? Me kno ou to speak dat at least.”
Erik playfully elbows him and answers him with that smugness his teachers hate. “Amabini anokudlala oko umdlalo, uyazi,” he answers back, which makes Sam smile brightly and whisper ‘alright, okay, alright’ while elbowing him back.
Bucky, though, smiles and just watches their friendly bickering, finally feeling at home. He missed this feeling. He missed them both so much.
Somehow, they're already in front of their lockers, all three of them stopping together in order starting from Bucky to Sam to Erik. In fact, that’s how they met in middle school. They happened to have been assigned lockers right next to each other when school first started; Erik arrived first and mistook his locker for Sam’s, and when Sam got there Erik wouldn’t let him get close to it. They almost got into a fistfight until they both saw Bucky trying to open the locker they were both fighting for.
Of course, after all three of them were sent to the principal's office, they’ve been best friends ever since.
Erik starts to fumble with his lock, reciting the combination under his breath like he always does with important things he has to remember, until he hears Bucky whisper to Sam to turn around and look.
“Okoye! Koko!” The voice of some girl catches their attention. They turn their eyes to the row of lockers in front of them to see Okoye ‘Koko’ Milaje turn to her girlfriend just in time to catch her as she throws herself at her. Her girlfriend, Nakia, excitedly throws her arms around her middle, burying her face in her girlfriend’s chest. She says something that only Okoye can hear because she laughs brightly, leans down, and presses a kiss to her forehead.
Sam smiles at Bucky, who smiles back at him and says “girls” as though that explains everything and turns to focus on opening his locker. From the corner of his eye he quickly realizes that only two people stop to stare at the couple, and only one looks like they’re disgusted… though they don’t do anything about it, instead opting to turn away from them. Good, Sam thinks. He doesn't have the time for that bullshit so early in the morning. He turns to mention it to Erik, and his friend’s expression is not the annoyed one he expected for witnessing the kiss since he says to hate ‘corny romantic bullshit’ (which is a lie, because he once caught him intensely watching a telenovela in the middle of history class) but instead his expression is just one of...pain.
Sam frowns, confused. Pain...?
“So that’s why he’s here…” Erik whispers, looking away from them.
Bucky peeks over his shoulder and turns to Erik while Sam orderly puts his belongings inside his locker, who is still looking at Erik from the corner of his eye. “Who?” Bucky asks.
“Huh?” Erik stops harshly throwing his books inside his locker to look at him askew. He comes back to himself soon enough though, and he quickly closes his eyes, shaking his head with a sigh. “No, nothing. I was just talking to myself.”
Both Bucky and Sam look at each other, and suddenly, they feel the need to ask him about it again because the troubled look on their friend’s face bothers them, but the ring of the school bell interrupts before either of them can say anything.
“Well, gotta go.” Erik sighs irritably, slamming his locker door closed. “See y’all later – ah, wait. Both of you have art first period, right? With, uh, Ms. Minako?” He asks.
Sam nods. “Yeah, why?”
“Okay, so, my cousin.” Erik says, adding an eyeroll for extra measure. “He’s coming to our school.” Sam and Bucky both raise their eyebrows in surprise, and Erik nods. “Yeah, he’s gonna come to school here, sadly. For some fucking reason. Anyways, he’s probably going to be late since his dumb ass didn’t wake up on time ‘cuz he was busy moping around and I wasn't going to wait for him. He’s in the same class as y’all, I believe, so if y'all could, you know, show him around… or whatever… I’d be… uh,” he coughs into his fist. “I, uh, I’d appreciate it. Seriously.” His voice turns quieter and softer as he finishes, eyes cast away. He leans from one side to another on his heels like he always does when he’s impatient or nervous.
Bucky raises an eyebrow and decides to tease him. “Hold up,” he quickly leans over him, causing Erik to step back. “You’re asking us for a favor?”
“And does that mean you actually care about your cousin?” Sam asks, wrapping his arm around Erik’s shoulder to join in on teasing him too.
Of course, it’s a trick question. Both Bucky and Sam already know that Erik cares a lot about his family (except for his uncle) and that includes his so called ‘frigid ass cousin’, despite… current events. Erik is simply not an openly affectionate person and he would never admit that he’s not the ‘cold-hearted ass bitch’ he claims to be. He would rather dump all of his anime-inspired clothing than admit to having any sort of normal human feelings whatsoever.
“Fuck off!” He yells, pushing Sam off him as Sam laughs at his little tantrum, and Erik is suddenly thankful that his brown skin masks the heat rising to his cheeks. “Just – will you do it or not?!”
“Sure,” Bucky smiles. “He’s uh, quiet—”
“Full of himself—” Sam adds.
“Aaaand he’s annoying. Not hard to spot.” Erik scoffs.
Sam laughs and waves him goodbye. “Okay, you should go before you’re late.”
The smaller teen nods and turns around to head to his class, the sound of his boot heels echoing in the empty halls. While they walk towards their art class, Sam wonders what kind of person Erik’s cousin is and if he's as much of a jerk as Erik makes him out to be. Is he just as grumpy as Erik? Just as smart? Does he also say what’s on his mind without a filter? Does he smile? Is he just as direct? Does he care as deeply, but doesn’t show it? Is he just as soft when he wants to be?
… And is he straight?
“Good morning, Sam! Hello, James!” Ms. Minako welcomes them as they enter her room. “You guys are late.” She’s sitting on the same table as the rest of the students there, with a bunch of different colorful objects laid on it.
“Good morning, ma’am.” Sam greets her, Bucky greeting her too with a wave of his own as they make their way to the farthest seats at the other end of the table. Sam sets his backpack to his right with a pleased hum, while his best friend sits to his left and he takes comfort in the fact that nobody will sit by his right side. There’s plenty of other empty seats around so maybe he’ll have some peace of mind this year (last year he had the misfortune of being seated next to Tony fucking Stark). Besides, it’s not like anyone would decide to sit next to Bucky either, because last year the girl that did so ended up being his designated art partner… and let’s just say… not that many people can handle Bucky’s emotional outbursts. So, it’s a win-win that he gets to be with his best friend. Bucky can be a little weird, he won’t lie. But he knows his friend, he knows who he is, he knows his life and he knows what really happened during those years (news media be damned), so he's more than happy to deal with this so called 'trouble kid’ of the school. They don't know him like he does.
Ms. Minako checks them off the attendance list with a smile and counts the class again. It seems there’s students missing, judging from her confused face and her nervous pencil tapping. “Well, I guess most of you are here. Only two students are absent—”
As if on cue there’s a knock on the door, suddenly halting all talk.
“Oh! Must be the new student!” Ms. Minako declares cheerfully. Sam twists anxiously in his seat, leaning over to see who it is. Is it him…? “Open the door for him, please.”
One of the students next to her stands up and opens the door, returning to her seat quietly. From his spot, Sam can see him stride in.
The first thing he notices is his hair, his short fro perfectly shaped and adorning his face like a crown. His clothes look like they are from a quality brand -- elegant, but simple. Sam’s eyes go back up to his face and he finds warm brown eyes staring right back at him. He jumps slightly in his seat and feels his face warm up at getting caught staring, but Erik’s cousin doesn’t seem to mind because he smiles instead, winking at Sam with a tilt of his head.
Sam swiftly turns his eyes to his lap, repeating in his mind ‘STARE AT THE TABLE STARE AT THE TABLE STARE AT THE TABLE’ as he fidgets with a strand of his shirt. This definitely wasn’t on his to-do list either.
He winked at me?!
“Yo,” Bucky whispers to him. “Was it just me or did he wink at me?”
Sam blinks. “I thought he winked at me,” he whispers back.
“... Maybe at both of us? Probably you, though. I’m a mess.” He sighs, laying his head down on the table.
Sam snickers, playfully dragging Bucky’s long wavy hair to cover his face. “You wouldn’t look a mess if you used a damn brush, you lightskin 2-b Rapunzel.”
Bucky flips him off.
From across their seats he hears a couple of girls commenting on the new student’s appearance, one in particular making colorful comments in Spanish to her twin. Sam can recognize her voice without looking. Her name’s Chal, and her sister’s name is Ime. They all hang out together occasionally since their mom is good friends with his mom. They usually play video games when good ones come out and sometimes decide to have some impromptu language classes – the twins teach him Spanish, and Sam tries to teach them Patois, and they more or less manage to learn a couple of words since they use most of their learning time laughing hysterically at each other’s accents instead.
“El diablo,” Chal whispers to Ime. “Papasito… que guapo, no?”
Handsome. Sam hates that he understood that. Seems like those Spanish classes they gave him paid off.
Ime laughs and nods, saying something else to her sister’s ear. Chal giggles in response, patting Ime’s puffy hair bun until her sister pushes her hands away with a smile. Suddenly, Sam wishes he had a close relationship like that with his own sister, but he shakes the thought off as soon as the teacher speaks. Let’s not start the day with a gloomy thought.
“Hi!” Ms. Minako says. “You’re T.… challa... Uda… koh…?”
“T’Challa Udaku.” T'Challa smiles. “It’s okay.  Just T’Challa is fine.”
“T’Challa?” Ms. Minako tries again, with a concentrated face.
T'Challa smiles again, and nods. “That’s right.”
Chal elbows her sister, whispering loud enough for Sam to hear. “Suena Africano, no? O quizás del caribe?”
“Africano, me parece.” Ime whispers back.
“Nah, es caribeño.” Chal shakes her head.
“Africano.”
“Caribeño, coño.”
“You have a slight accent.” Ms. Minako asks T'Challa, interested. “Where are you from?”
“I am from Wakanda.” He answers.
A tiny ‘fuck!’ is heard from Chal, but only Ime and Sam seem to notice. He tries not to laugh as Ime elbows her sister in the stomach. These girls.
“New to the country or the town?”
“Both.” T'Challa laughs. “It’s a lovely town.”
If only you knew, Sam thinks, you wouldn’t be saying that. But he shakes the thought off, again, trying not to be negative… again. It’s hard to not to be a pessimist. But enough is enough. He wants to be a therapist when he grows up, goddamn it, so he needs to get it together.
“Well, T'Challa, welcome to the country! Come on, choose a seat. Let’s start the class!” Ms. Minako gestures towards all the empty seats as she checks him off the attendance sheet. T'Challa turns over where a group of loud white boys are seated together, but his eyes pass right over them. He looks at the seat next to Ime and Chal (the latter batting her eyelashes dramatically, making T'Challa smile) and considers it, until he looks over at the end of the table where Sam is.
There’s one empty seat right next to his.
He looks decided then, walking past everyone and stopping right next to Sam with a click of his heels. Not quite believing what’s happening, Sam can only stare at his own hands and ask to whichever god is listening to make T'Challa sit somewhere else. Next to Bucky, even. He’ll do anything. Hell, he’ll stop eating his gran’s mac and cheese! But please, god, don’t let him sit next to him. T'Challa’s too… too…
“Is this seat taken?” T'Challa’s soft voice comes from his right, and Sam makes the mistake of turning his head towards him.
… Too pretty.
T'Challa’s eyes shine like the sun, his hand resting on the table. Sam’s breath hitches as dark brown eyes lock on his. His face is a little too close for his comfort, so Sam scoots back. T’Challa tilts his head to one side in confusion, waiting for him to answer but Sam can only focus on those lovely brown eyes of his, not even caring that the silence is getting a little bit too awkward, but he just doesn’t know what to say because T'Challa’s way too close and—
Bucky elbows him in the ribs, bringing him back to earth.
“Are you feeling alright?” T'Challa’s face turns to one of worry, somehow inching even closer to Sam. “You look—”
“I’m okay!” He blurts out, laughing nervously. He looks at Bucky from the corner of his eye and sees the bastard stifling a smile. Fucker.
T'Challa’s eyes widen in surprise, waiting for him to continue. “I’m—um, the seat isn’t taken, so…” Sam's eyes slide down to the empty chair while fake coughing and pressing his lips into a thin line, trying to play it cool. Oh my god this is too embarrassing why am I acting like this.
“Alright, thank you.” T'Challa’s face lights up and Sam can’t help but smile as well, despite how nervous he feels. T'Challa drops his bag to his side and sits down gracefully on the chair with a smile. “Nice to meet you,” he says with a radiant smile, while offering his hand to him like a proper gentleman.
Sam’s brain has the decency to remember to dry his anxiously-damp hand on his jeans before he shakes T’Challa’s with an equally anxious smile. It’s kind of odd, it almost feels like they’re finishing a business meeting. Why yes, sir, I’m glad we’ve come to the mutual agreement that I’m awkward as hell, let’s shake on it. But it could be a Wakandan thing, who knows. T'Challa has a strong grip on his hand as soon as they touch, and he shakes Sam’s hand with confidence, taking Sam by surprise as the strong shake dips him forward. He has no time to be embarrassed because T'Challa smiles at him and the guy giggles as though stumbling into someone else’s personal space is charming. He lets go of Sam and instead rests his face on his hand, two fingers up to support the crown of his head.  
“What’s your name?” T'Challa asks, eyes filled with curiosity.
And it’s at this moment when there’s another knock on the door, catching everyone’s attention.
“Oh!” The teacher exclaims. “Must be the other missing student.” This time it’s her who stands up to open the door, blocking the view of Sam’s eyes to see who it is.
“You’re a bit late, mister.” She reprimands the student. “But it’s the first day, so I’ll let it slide this time, alright?”
“I appreciate it.” Says a deep, and… quite attractive masculine voice.
Ms. Minako stands to the side and shows him the way. “Come on in!”
As soon as the student enters the room he can see exactly who it is. M’Baku walks into the classroom with that confidence Sam is so jealous of, looking as handsome as ever. His dark brown skin glows despite the unflattering light of the classroom, as though M’Baku is the exception to little things like physics. His clothes, of course, always carry a Wakandan theme, showing off the beautiful African patterns and combination of colors.
Sam looks over to the twins and finds Chal fanning herself while looking at M’Baku, who suddenly has a distasteful look on his face when his eyes fall on the only acceptable empty seats in the room. The one next to Bucky, and the one next to the twins. His eyes soon fall on T’Challa, and he falters. He recovers quickly though and walks around the table to sit down right across from him – next to Bucky’s seat.
Sam’s eyes go back to T’Challa, who seems to be… frozen in place while looking at M’Baku. He gets it though. One time, he got to seat behind him in math class and every time the teacher called M’Baku’s name to mark him present, he would stand up and give Sam a great first row view of that—
“So, uh,” Bucky’s voice brings him back to earth. He turns his head towards him and sees him talking to M’Baku, who can’t look less interested. “Guess we’re art partners now, huh?”
M’Baku finally looks at him with a neutral look on his face and says, “I am lactose intolerant.”
Bucky freezes.
Sam completely loses it. He can’t help but laugh out loud, making a spectacle even though he tries his damn best to keep it in. Naturally, he attracts some of his classmates’ eyes, but he just can’t stop. He’s trying so hard, but Jesus. The look on Bucky’s face, he keeps remembering it and can’t help but laugh again.
“Mhm, keep on laughing, man. Just let it all out, you dick.” Bucky tell him as he claps Sam on the back, which only makes it worse.
Ms. Minako finally looks over at him, looking confused and quite annoyed at the noise. “Excuse me, Sam? Are you alright?”
“Yeah, Sam, are you alright?” Bucky repeats, faking the worrying tone in his voice as he scoots closer to Sam to look him right in the eye.
“Y-Yes, miss, I’m— I’m fine,” Sam tries to tell her while desperately trying to ignore Bucky’s stupid face. “Thank you. Sorry about—” and he laughs again.
“Do you need to go to the nurse, Sam?” she asks, sounding annoyed.
“Yeah, Sam, do you need to go to the nurse?” Bucky repeats again with that dumb look on his face and it makes it harder for Sam to stop laughing.
“No! N-No, I’m alright. I’m so sorry, miss, please uh, please carry on.” He coughs and bites his lip, mustering all his energy into having a poker face. It doesn’t work, it just makes him look weird with his bulging eyes, tight lips and puffy cheeks… but the teacher is satisfied enough with it to let it go.
“So, uh,” Sam turns to Bucky, a smile threatening to slip past his lips but still desperately trying to look neutral. “Wanna change seats?”
Bucky licks his lips, also trying not to smile, and nods. “Yeah, that’s— yeah, let’s change seats, man.”
Once they’re at their new seats, Bucky turns to T’Challa. “Soooo, guess we’re—”
“I’m also lactose intolerant.” He tells him with a mastered poker face.
Sam lays his head down and covers his head with his arms to tone down his loud laughter, shaking and softly smacking the table with his first a couple times. Bucky can’t hold it in either, leaning forward on the table and shaking his head as he laughs with Sam. M’Baku joins in with a loud and deep ‘HAH!’ and nothing else. T’Challa smiles ever so slightly, and the sight almost makes Bucky stop, feeling charmed by his smile and the soft crinkles at the corner of his eyes. He couldn’t quite get a look at him at first, but now he understands why Sam froze when T’Challa talked to him.
Sam coughs, and looks towards T’Challa, trying to frown in order to cancel out the dumb smile on his face. “Hey man, um, do you— uh, do you… wanna change seats?” He fake coughs into his fist, and Bucky feel his lips twitch. “Or, uh, or something?” Sam bites his lip again, praying to any god that is listening to make him stop laughing.
“I don’t see why not.” T’Challa calmly answers, picking up his stuff and changing his seat with Sam.
Once they’re finally seated, Sam speaks. “Don’t worry, Buck, I got you man. I, uh, you know, I take them lactaid tablets—”
Bucky whizzes out a small laugh, and nods. “Oh yeah?”
“Yes, sir,” Sam nods as well, patting him on the back. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, you ain’t gotta worry about that.”
“Thanks, Sam,” Bucky says, smiling at him. “I know I can always count on you.”
“Nuh-uh, uh!” Sam shakes his finger on his face. “Only as long as I got my lactaid tablets,” he adds, and after a second of dead silence they both laugh loud and hard, Sam leaning on Bucky and Bucky flinching for half a second but relaxing quickly enough against Sam’s warmth.
Sam looks up at him from his shoulder. “Stop making me laugh, man, fuck. My face hurts.”
Bucky shrugs, Sam’s head moving with it. “That’s karma, asshole.”
Sam shakes his head, and closes his eyes, smiling softly. “I hate you.”
Bucky snorts. “And I hate you too, sweetheart.” Sam smacks him for that, whispering ‘gross!’ to which Bucky replies ‘but you like it!’ to which the teacher replies ‘both of you boys better shut up unless you want to be sent to the principal’s office’.
Half way through the class, their phones both vibrate at the same time, and they instantly look at each other. After making sure the teacher isn’t looking at them, they look down to check who texted them from under the table.
 Steve♢ is online
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ) is online
Bucky ( ˘-___-) is online
Sammy is online
 Steve ♢: hey hey hey
Steve ♢: Erik told me about his cousin!
Steve ♢: is he cool?
Sammy: …….maybe
Steve ♢: ヽ( ・∀・)ノ i’ll get his number then!
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): steve
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): steve im begging you here
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): please dont fuck my cousin
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): p l e a s e
Steve ♢: you know, i wasn’t thinking about that
Steve ♢: but now that you mention it…
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): steve
Sammy: oh btw Erik your middle school crush is in our class
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): my middle school what now
Bucky ( ˘-___-): M’Baku. or did you forget about him already?
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): fuck off bucks
Steve ♢: wait what
Bucky ( ˘-___-): Erik had like… the biggest crush on him back in middle school
Sammy: it was kinda cute tbh he would like… talk to him about this anime he really liked. which he got m’baku to watch somehow someway
Bucky ( ˘-___-): And there was this couple in the show. Real romantic shit you know? Erik would say how M’Baku is so much like the romantic interest of the hero
Sammy: and also how Erik was so much like the hero himself
Bucky ( ˘-___-): M’Baku never got the hint though. But it was cute to watch. A bit pathetic, sure, but cute!
Sammy: and of course a funny story to tell every person he dates lmao
Steve ♢: aww Erik you sweet thing you!
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): this
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): is the worst day of my life
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): ever
Bucky ( ˘-___-): Hey do you remember that stupid song?
Sammy: which one Sammy: “M’baku and Erik sitting under a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G watching A-N-I-M-E”
Sammy: is it that one
Bucky ( ˘-___-): yeah! cute isn't he?
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): IM BLOCKING YOU
Steve ♢: lol erik that’s so cute
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): IM BLOCKING BOTH OF YOU
Steve ♢: cute cute cute
Sammy: cute lol
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ) is offline
Steve ♢: omg
Sammy: HE ACTUALLY LEFT LMFAOOOO
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ) is online
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): i forgot to say something :)
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ): FUCK YOU ALL
Bucky ( ˘-___-): Damn that’s hot
Steve ♢: i didn't know Erik was this adorable
Sammy: he aight i guess
Erik ( ಠ ಠ ) is offline
 This year is going to be fun.
1 note · View note
covsol · 5 years
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Impact of Social Media Marketing
Did you know that almost every business has its presence in at least one social media platform? This demonstrates that increasingly organizations are acknowledging the power of social media. Yep, it’s true about 95% of marketers believed that Social Media has generated platform to showcase their brand to billions of people around the world. So, what is this fuss on Social Media Marketing? How the brands are targeting these platforms to reach mass customers?
Let’s just start with basic of Social Media Marketing.  It is marketing of your brand using various social media platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Instagram and so on.  Organizations of all size, be it an SME or MNC use these platforms to reach their prospects and customers. It allows you to interact with your audiences.
SMM is a continuous process of gaining and retaining your customers, to achieve your marketing and branding goals.
Below are a few advantages of  Social Media Marketing:
It increases your website traffic
It increases Brand Awareness
It helps in creating a Brand Identity and Brand Association
It helps in reaching and interacting with your Target Audiences
Improved Search Engine Ranking
Cost Effective
Improved Brand Loyalty with a number of likes and followers
So How does this Social Media Marketing work? How does it help brands to achieve its goals? The answer is to create effective goal-oriented Social Media Campaigns. Below are a few pointers help you to understand what these campaigns are:
Social Media Campaigns:
Campaigns without any strategy won’t make any difference, no matter which tool you use. You need to clear the following things before creating your Social Media Campaign.
What are your Goals? (Brand Awareness, Sales, Lead Gen, Promotional event etc)
Who is your Target Audience?
Which Social Media Platform to Target?
What Message do you want to give to your Target Audience
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Various Social Media Platforms and How Brands used them for promotions:
Here is a brief overview of how to use Social Media as each Platform has its own unique User Base and environment. Different Social Media sites require different approaches to engage with Target Audiences so the strategy to acquire clients you need to develop as per the platform and the Audience present there. The most commonly used Social Media Platforms are as follows:
1: Facebook:
Facebook is arguably the most popular and loved social media platform which is been used by all age group people starting from school going kid to a 60-year-old man.
As per Statistics, it has more than 1.23 Billion active users, 62% of whom log in on daily basis. That’s the reason why Facebook is on the hot list of every company for their social media marketing. Because it will help you to reach. the maximum number of audience.
With the help of Facebook page of your product, you can engage more people by posting various and informative videos related to your brand, you can also post the funny and humorous post so that people won’t feel bored looking at your post. Facebook will also help you to understand the expectation of customers from your product and this will also encourage people to talk about your product and give away their feedback about it. So basically Facebook plays a critical role in the success of your brand.
Let’s take an example of Dacia (a subsidiary of Renault) known for their functional cars. Used Facebook Ad campaigns to generate leads and brand awareness. They have achieved 45% reduction in the cost per lead compared to standard display ads, 27 point increase in ad recall, 6 points uplift in the purchase of the product.
2. Instagram:
It’s been just 7 years since Instagram launched and introduced us to the filters and square format photos, and since then it’s taken the world by storm. If we go into statistics 28-30% of adults living in the US has an Instagram profile, not only that but more than 75% users are the people other than the US with around 700 million active monthly users. This is why now Instagram is not just limited to personal use but it is a brilliant platform for Social Media Marketing. Marketers can reach globally using this and can create brand awareness, hire/recruit new talents, showcase their products/content using Photos and Videos and Inspire the audience.
Red bull a famous energy drink brand used Instagram campaigns to drive awareness of their new product “Summer Edition” Drink in Australia. They released a promotional teaser just before summer to get audience focused on their new look of the cans. This was associated with #thissummer hashtag trend and the final result they have achieved is 10% lift in top-of-mind awareness, 1.2 Million consumer reach, 9 point lift in favorability.
3. Twitter:
Like Facebook, Twitter is also widely popular microblogging site. Currently, Twitter has 307 million active users around the world. That’s the reason why Twitter can be a really important platform for your social media marketing due to its exceptional growth and reach to the customer.
Twitter is one of the most effective & simple platforms to stay connected with your audience and also to build a strong relationship with them. Nowadays every company targeting Twitter for their branding purpose, because by posting good & useful information through tweets they will able to get the attention of more customers, people will start to follow them, so ultimately the company’s brand name is creating among the customers and with this, companies can build a strong relationship with their customer.
Girl scouts a Non-Profit Organization used Twitter as a platform to Maximize their App Installation. They have had 19500+ twitter driven App Installations.
4. YouTube:
YouTube is the number one Platform for creating and sharing Video Content. As per the Survey report “It has massive traffic and viewers, with over 1.32 Billion people using Youtube. There are currently 300 hours of video uploaded to YouTube every minute of every day – 5 hours of video content every second! Which only validates the fact that video marketing is a growing trend – the numbers say it all.” It is one of the most powerful Social Media Tool as if the video gets Viral, it will lead you to a very big audience, this is the reason why a lot of Marketers are focusing on creating/sharing a video with the aim of getting viral. But in reality instead of making a Viral video one should focus on creating “How to” Videos, as it gives you the added benefit of appearing in on the higher search result.
L’Oréal teamed up with UK’s 5 most influential beauty YouTubers to Promote their Products. This saw a genuine relationship with bloggers and Products. This was viewed more than 5 million times and had 100,000 likes on YouTube and Facebook.
5. LinkedIn
LinkedIn is a Professional Social Media Networking Platform and is a vital tool for entering a professional network of people with similar interests or industries. It is great for posting Jobs and for general employee networking. It has over 550 Million Professional Users, in which 4 out of 5 Members drive a business decision. Experts to suggest that writing posts just for LinkedIn is the fastest way to grow your Brand and Connections.
6. Pinterest:
Pinterest is one of the fastest growing Image/Info-graphic sharing Social Media Website with nearly 200 Million Users. It is basically Ideal for Retail but anyone can be benefited by using it for their Social Media Strategy or Ad runs. It allows marketers to create awareness about their organization or product/services with eye-catching, unique Pinboards.
It helps in creating brands and if you are targeting females, this is one of the best platforms to acquire them as the network does have more female users than male. Survey stats that approximately 68% of US females aged up to 54 years use Pinterest.
Burberry to promote their lashes they have asked users 3 questions about their beauty style and those answers were used to create a personalized board. This lead Burberry to tap 38.5 Million viewers monthly to the beauty category.
7. Reddit:
Reddit or any other similar Social Media Platform like StumbleUpon, Digg, Delicious, etc. are ideal for sharing unique, interesting content and can help you in getting potential leads or conversions. But the content should be unique, interesting or informative, if it is spammy, it cannot be welcomed by the community. Reddit has an Incredible Marketing Potential but it can be used wisely and smartly. According to statistics, most Reddit users are male, between the ages of 35-44 and with income levels generally around $25,000-$50,000 per year. The reason nowadays Social Media Marketers are targeting these Social Media sites too for their Marketing Strategy.
Social Media Marketing is a highly cost-effective way to reach a mass audience. If you play your cards right, you can get your product/services or anything in front of a huge audience at the most nominal cost. SMM allows you to select and target your audience as per your budget and helps to achieve your Organizational as well as Social Media Marketing Goal.
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teydious · 4 years
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a month of quarantine
since everyone is talking about #quaranthings on social media, you name it, facebook, twitter, ig, tiktok, a week ago someone even sent me a group message (i mean bruh who does that nowadays) i might as well crack some thoughts instead of yet another episode of lying and mulling over nonsense things on bed, so now im in my desk to what i assume an office-corner in my room, pretending that im absolutely focused and have nothing ever to distract me from writing this entry - sooo here it is, my hashtag-quaranthings.
i think i’ve reach the point of letting myself to go mad and do whatever my mind tells me to, i’ve been basically a slave to my own mind. yep, since i peaked teenage life there was not a day i dont protest doing what my whole being is against with and still end up doing it because im such an idiot without self-control. this apparently has led me to horrible, horrible decisions coated with a massive energy of remorse and humiliation. yay, congrats to me; a person who always been dragged by wants and spontaneous impulses. really, how do i still show my face around?! 😭
a week after lockdown i was at tug of war between my body and my screwed sleeping schedule. i literally slept between 2-3 am, wakes up around 10am and sleep again for four hours at 3pm. this was on loop for about two weeks until i mentally beat my ass and decided to get my shit together and fix my routine. ahh, yes routine🙃 that word has long been astrayed since i entered college. my high school phase was calm, too timid and organize, seems all things was in my palms and i get to dictate my good and bad habits, but boy when i came to college, it was a different level of stupidity. my time management, my habits, routines, my schedules were fucked up and tossed to the other side of the Pacific ocean - i was at loss. mentally, i was drained; physically, dehydrated and always always tired; my will and passion seems limited and i was always profoundly unmotivated; i didnt know i am and these strange people keep pushing me to cross the line, they seem to bring out something i didnt know i had in me.. or was it always within me and i’ve been concealed all my life? either way im still fucked up. now came to my terrible choices, after two weeks of lockdown, well i kind of tried to do productive things - i draw, i read books, i actually read 3 books(heh be proud self), i fixed my room, my closet and did some reformations, i wrote couple of things, i watched educational films - i basically TrIEd to iron my crampled routine. but i wouldn’t say i’ve done everything because obviously im still slacking off, not a surprise anymore. the funny thing is though im aware of my shit, i still not do anything about it😬 god i am forever be a shitty person with shitty decisions in life. im trashy than raccoons. my life has been digital, insecured, unable to write a proper piece, hang out in twitter and bragged my filtered habits, plus ignoring people who reach out and onlyrespind to selected few i feel like talking to. i know, i know stab me in the back, im a terrible friend.
i did keep track of my emotions though. i was coming back and forth with my feelings, and desperate to have someone to flirt with(because trust me, thats what everyone i know seems to be doing in quarantine). last night, someone i like drop a bomb at me. i mean, it happen so fast til now i still dont know how to digest the information. to give a little backstory, i like this guy for around 5-6 months now i guess, whoa thats long for a crush; we dont talk much especially now that social distancing have been the absolute rule of all time. we do chat sometimes, brief conversations i still squeeled about, however last night he, out of knowhere, told me he and his girl friend already called the thing off, “split na kami” he says, and i was like bruhhh what u say? u cant hust drop that to someone who’s secrelty infatuated by for months😳 trust me i was hyperventilating the moment he said that. i couldn’t breathe properly, my mind is thrown in different places, and hand itched to slap my face to knock some sense. it was a bomb i didnt know would drop so abruptly and so fast! you know, when you predicted that something will happen eventually and it did happen, only that it was sudden and terse and you were unprepared but the bomb just come dropped off at that exact moment, boom! i didnt die, but i sure am breathless, figuratively and literally. to be honest, i didnt know of i should be happy, i didnt know what appropriate emotion should i be feeling even. i didnt feel sorry for their relationship, it would be sounding hypocrite to say that. i was unconvinced, but i felt giddy. partly, i wanted to believe it was true, that they broke up and that i should be happy, but what would this happiness leads me..? false hope? because suddenly they broke up and it was my turn? that night, i dreamt about him. he’s even haunting my dream now.
anyway, this has been long and i must admit that it was a good thing that i was able to write this much instead of abiding the limited characters when i tweet. my #quaranthings aren’t finished and i’d like it to surprise me whatever it brings me.
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gracehasasimblognow · 6 years
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ITS TIME FOR OUR FAVE BLOND(E)S
its literally been so long (calm down grace dont be so dramatic) since the first one and i think i started on summer so thats what im going for
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im sorry i dont know if the black dress is summer/hot weather or party but its here (im sorry i let you down erin). Also had to have her boat shoes/sketchers somewhere bc she loves them and i support that love of hers
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I think sim lorraine’s theme was blue and she looks like an ice princess and im digging it. 
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All he wears is black and red i missed this kid so much
Ok so i think rain wear was next ( im sorry im a mess)
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ok listen let me explain this was still early in my cas adventure so i did styled looks and she had a yellow coat and a hat and i was just like yep erin is wearing a rain hat now. I think she looks great
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MATCHING BOOTS AND JACKET AMAZING
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WHY CANT THIS KID TAKE A DECENT PIC THROW ME A BONE DERRICK MY DUDE
Ummm winter clothes lets gooooo
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this looks like the jacket she already own and i found hair that looks like hers down so aaayyyy v realistic
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once again this was already on her this game knows what i want hashtag blessed
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he looks so smug and i dont know why but it making me laugh so hard
And now just random extras i suppose
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i love this new fancy dress (formal)
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this isnt like a real outfit, but it was there, under the swim category, and i refuse to get rid of it bc its too iconic (dont worry she has a normal cute one too)
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the mood today throughout the sims is dramatic swim wear
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this was Derrick’s pre loaded cold outfit and i almost fell on the floor when i saw it so i decided to keep it. Its so funny bc he would never wear this on his own, yet it is still in his colors.
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