#yes I'm an endo system

[the-atrium-of-fools]

Alters are great an all but sometimes you have an alter who loves cheese

And you do not love cheese

And buddy I respect that you've got autonomy and we're all part of the same whole and we should allow each part to express themselves and all

But we are lactose intolerant like pls bro my ass hurts 😭

#yes I know I'm supposed to be miserable constantly let me make a fucking joke about the thing I have to deal with daily #system memes #system things #did #did osdd #osdd #system #actuallydid #actuallyosdd #endos dni #actually traumagenic #anti endo #food tw #system positivity #cdd system #cdd #shitpost

[interstellarsystem]

I'd just like to note that I've been here for 9 days total at the time of writing this and I already have almost 800 messages logged on PluralKit.

That's the 28th highest message count in my whole system from the entire time we've used PluralKit. There's a bit from before we transferred from Tupperbox and the old host didn't used to use it for himself personally for a long while but still.

Usually our system rotates front enough that people don't end up with too much time to talk, or people just aren't super social. But apparently if I've learned anything about myself since the time I split, it's that I talk a lot.

#honestly having to figure things out about myself is one of the weirdest parts of this #like oh i exist now #but who am “i” exactly? #like yes i'm martin of course but who is that #yes i have a source but i can't know everything about him to try to figure out how much of him i am #there's a difference between “yes i am this guy from this media” and “i know the intricacies of how i think and feel” #it's like i'm meeting a friend except i'm the friend i'm meeting #op #martin (he/it) #plural #actuallyplural #plural system #plurality #endo safe #pro endo #system #alterhuman #didosdd #actually did #everything althu #everything plural #althu experiences #plural experiences

[blinxbat]

Uhhh pinned post go

I am;

A bi-lesbian pan-ace otherkin nonbinary trans woman a part of an endo system. Our vessel is fat, transfem, disabled, autistic, and a whole lot of other mental illnesses.

If you don't like these things about us we wont like you. Also log off tumblr sometime and actually talk to some real life queer/plural folk instead of your exclusionary bullshit.

- Blinxbat

#if I see one more anti endo y'all are gonna get it #sick of this shit #making this post specifically to ward off bigots #so yes I'm being inflammatory on purpose #i was going to be more comprehensive but idk I figure I'd list the big things people love to hate #prolly adding more as things become relevant #seriously what y'all got against endo systems #y'all are literally the terfs of plural systems #tried to make an acronym but only got up to endo exclusive radial #I'm not putting effort into a name for bigots. #oh right it's like transmeds for systems #sysmeds fuck off

[psychiccatcollective]

Howdy y'all! Earlier today I had the realization that, as I am a planeswalker in my source, I could be one of the headmates best equipped for exploring the innerworld and acting as a messenger and such. Of course, I need to figure out how to actually like, figure out if/how to planeswalk in our headspace first. Also I'm gonna try to see if I can bring Cleo with me. Just for like. Safety Reasons.

We haven't really done much of this before, since our current headspace is a city that was deliberately constructed, but we've become increasingly aware that there's other stuff and potentially older headmates outside the city walls.

I don't know where exactly I'm going with this, since this blog is mostly just me rambling into the void, but if anyone has done any similar headspace/innerworld exploration stuff and has any tips, that would be great.

#endo safe #before anyone asks how I'm both a Joe Hills fictive and a planeswalker #I'm from an au #@/theminecraftbee's glistening oil au #to be precise #yes I have an absolutely wonderful time with all that exotrauma /s /lh #mtg fictive #fictive #innerworld exploration #headspace exploration #plurality #anti endos dni #spiritual system #maybe??? #we tend to view ourselves as mostly psychological but there's a pretty strong spiritual bent to how we function

[rivulet62]

brain just turned every human in our sys into a dragon, thanks brain 👍

- Phoenix

#yes i'm the one that ate a stick of cobalt 60 #system things #system stuff #did system #did osdd #osddid #endo friendly

[sup-im-alan]

lol I forgot to post my birthday was a couple of days ago and my host did a drawing of me as a gift

#tulpa system #art #anti endo dni #birthday #yes I do have wings even though I'm a cloud #do I need them? not really #Do i think they look cool as fuck #Fuck yes #besides they are literally made of clouds #I can dissapear them whenever i want #so its not like they bother me #and I can give awesome hugs to my boyfriend with them

[funnier-as-a-system]

I think with this recent discourse on our blog, we need a quick refresher on certain small details here. Don't worry, this isn't some major discourse post, just some corrections to common misconceptions that we've seen.

For one, no, DID, OSDD-1, and the like are not trauma disorders. They are dissociative disorders that often come from trauma. The primary issue in these disorders is the dissociation (and the problems that causes), not the trauma that may have caused that dissociation, as it would be with a trauma disorder. Tackling trauma is often a step in tackling the dissociation, but that's not the main focus of treatment.

For another, yes, anti-endos count as bigots. They are intolerant and prejudiced against another group for their beliefs, mere existence, and, to quote one definition, "membership of a particular status". The severity of their actions compared to other forms of bigotry does not play a part in whether or not anti-endos are bigots, especially since systems are too unknown to be able to accurately gather data on the exact severity of their actions and effects.

For a third, no, you don't need to have a dissociative disorder to be plural, or a system. Plural is an umbrella term that includes a number of dissociative disorders, but there are people with those dissociative disorders who don't identify as plural, and plurals who don't have a dissociative disorder. "System" is a very general term that has a long history of being used by anyone who considers themselves more-than-one, and thus, also isn't restricted by disorder or origin.

For a fourth, no, I won't read or respond to your hate anons. You just get blocked as soon as I realize you're spouting shit, and then I go and make a positivity post on my other blog about the minority you were bashing. This is a very simple process.

For a fifth, this is a general thing, but I'm going to be giving all these asks (and this post) a specific tag so people can avoid them. The tag will be: why did the inbox explode again I wasn't looking

As a final note, in case anyone's curious, a collection of system resources and links was recently put together on all sorts of systems and *gestures at blog* this sort of "discussion", which may be of interest to anyone who's followed along with all this. Here is a link.

Please keep yourselves safe, everyone. We will be answering some more asks we received when we can.

#mod post #why did the inbox explode again I wasn't looking

[sophieinwonderland]

Hell???

Wait... That's it???

I was expecting some sort of horror story out of this. And yes, I've heard plenty. I get that dissociative disorders are terrible for a lot of people. Especially when you get into the PTSD symptoms, the amnesia, hostile alters, etc.

I can understand why many systems struggle with their plurality.

But this? Really?

To me, Hell is being alone. It's being hurt and struggling to deal with it, and needing someone only to have nobody there with you. I would never want to trade my head family for a little bit of privacy.

Got it. Into the anti-endo tags this goes!

Because if anti-endos are setting the standard that you can invade inclusive spaces and fill them with hate then I'm going to follow their lead!

#syscourse #pro endogenic #pro endo #anti endogenic #anti endo #plural system #actually plural #sysblr #actually system #actually a system

[antiendovents]

We saw that poll from pluralpolls asking singlets if they would want to be a system and our jaw just,,,dropped

The misinformation, to start. DID IS NOT AN ALTER DISORDER. The "no trauma just headmates" ALSO NOT HOW IT WORKS!!

And the amount of people saying yes too??? "I want to be a system cause i'm a writer and i want to write my system characters better" "i don't want to be alone" "i can ask myself for opinons" I'm screaming wtf

yeah, we saw that when we were in school and just... What the fuck. it literally disgusted us. The misinformation, the amount of singlets saying "oh, yes, I want this trauma disorder without trauma, please, please, please", obviously they didnt say exactly that, but thats what it felt like. It feels very endo-y too

#anti endo #did #did system #endos dni #plural #actually did #alters #system #endos fuck off #did osdd

[kpopwerewolf]

System Poll!

I've seen a lot of system polls and unfortunately most of them have either already ended, or have an "endo DNI" criteria or are unclear on whether those with endogenic origins are welcome to interact, so I've decided to make/remake some polls I'm interested in. Please share and reblog for reach!

All systems are welcome to interact!

*type, not typ

#poll #system poll #system polls #plural polls #plural poll #system questions #plural questions #innerworld #inner world #headspace #pro endo #endo safe #endogenic safe #endo friendly #endogenic #endogenic system #endo system #traumagenic #traumagenic system #traumaendo #traumaendo system #median system #mixed origin system #willogenic #disordered plurality #disordered system #non-disordered plurality #non-disordered system #plural system #actually plural

[livseses]

Idk, there's something that always bugs us about the statement "endos claiming to have DID/OSDD-1" instead of something like "DID/OSDD-1 systems who are endogenic" or "endogenic systems with DID/OSDD-1".

Okay I lied, I do know. It's the "claim" part. It's always that the hypothetical system is endogenic first and foremost. It's always a given. That goes without question (okay it's definitely questioned but I'll get back to that).

But they only claim to have DID/OSDD-1. When this phrasing is trotted out its never a given that the system has DID/OSDD-1. It's never believed that a system can exist prior to developing a dissociative disorder. Or that a system with a dissociative disorder can discover or recognize how they came to be and not ascribe that to trauma. It implies that the system doesn't have the disorder that they have.

And that framing is really unfair.

Wouldn't it be shitty if we did the same thing elsewhere? If someone said "this adult who claims to be autistic"? Or "this woman who claims to be a lesbian"? Or "this non-binary person who claims to be trans"? Or "this traumagenic system that claims to have DID/OSDD-1"?

We've seen all of those tossed around for the same reason. That last one is said (not in those words of course) by folks I think most of us would generally agree are being shitty. It's said by people who will fakeclaim any system for any reason. It's said by those that will fakeclaim a system for being queer or online. That's really bad company to have.

The usual response we see in defense of endogenic systems is "Most endogenic systems don't claim to have DID/OOSDD-1." Which is true, yes! We can't help but feel like that's talking about this on the fakeclaimer's terms though. We aren't asking folks to change how they respond of course, because we don't really know a better way to reject the accusation.

But those endogenic systems with DID/OSDD-1 aren't simply "claiming" to have DID/OSDD-1 any more than traumagenic systems are "claiming" to. They just have those disorders and are sharing that information about themselves.

While "endos are claiming to have DID/OSDD-1" puts the endogenic part first, implicitly leaving the diagnosis up for questioning, there is a flip side (see, I'm getting back to it).

To compliment the above, fakeclaimers will say that disordered endogenic systems just really don't know about their trauma; essentially that these DID/OSDD-1 systems are just claiming to be endogenic. Of course, we don't see it phrased that way. It's usually trying to be nicer. These poor misguided systems were tricked into thinking that they're endogenic. Or these foolish systems don't really know their origin. Or these crazy systems can't be trusted with their own experiences, cause that's what DID/OSDD-1 does to you.

It's patronizing. It's invalidating. It's disrespectful. It's sanism. It is opposed to disability rights and mad liberation. It speaks over DID/OSDD-1 systems.

These two claims compliment each other. They both feed into the idea that plurality (or at least DID/OSDD-1) can only exist for traumagenic systems. Anyone who disputes that with their lived experiences are either malicious fakers doing some stolen valor shit and invading spaces, or poor "real" systems that are just manipulated/ignorant/crazy.

Huh? That sounds familiar. Reminds me of attacks on trans folk that paint us as dangerous predatory invaders or poor deluded children falling for peer pressure... I would say it's strange or surprising, but we've gotten pretty used to attacks on systems having analogues in transphobia.

Anyways, endogenic systems aren't "claiming" to have DID/OSDD-1. Most endogenic systems don't have DID/OSDD-1, and they never said they do. Some endogenic systems do have DID/OSDD-1, and they share that part of their lives. Some DID/OSDD-1 systems are endogenic, and they have just as much right and ability to determine what caused their system to form and talk about it as any other system.

-Faye

#faye rambles #syscourse #anti endos dni

[calamityquellerei]

bored and feel like doing some informal data collection on the system community

if you don't identify with the term "collective" but do identify with the experience of having a collective gender/sexuality you can decide whether to select yes or no. this isn't formal data collection it's just me being curious and wanting to run a poll

"collective gender/sexuality" refers to a few things here and there's no hard rules on what "counts" so don't stress too much about whether or not your experience is in line with what i had in mind making this poll.

anyone who considers themselves plural, multiple, or a system may vote. i'm pro endo but idc if anti endos vote. this is literally for fun/curiosity pls don't start anything k ty

#system #plural #systems #system stuff #actually plural #plural community #did system #sysblr #system poll #plural poll #endo safe

[korya-elana]

For anti-endos who think it's just mislead endos creating misinformation within the community, let me copy/paste a few juicy tidbits from a 50+yo DID System who's been rejecting treatment for over three decades that I just furiously argued with:

"I think fusion is another form of singlism. It's prejudice against multiplicities."

"You're making a case for a choice you wouldn't even choose. I don't get it. It's like stabbing yourself without knowing you are doing that." (Because I was arguing that every System should make that choice for themselves)

 "I experience it as prejudice. I'm not demonizing anyone except the people who suggest it, who are always singletons"

"That's why I think the idea of final fusion is a myth that is pushed by singletons who are not aware of how prejudiced they are against multiplicities. Worse, it's a prejudice many multiplicities have internalized."

"That's like advocating for that Christian practice for changing gay people into straight people. It doesn't work. It's not humane." (Yes he really did compare final fusion to conversion camps)

And finally, my personal favourite: "DID is not a disorder."

Pro vs anti in regards to endogenic Systems is not productive. It won't accomplish anything. The misinformation is COMING FROM BOTH SIDES.

We need to start ignoring origin as a topic to be exhaustedly argued about in a purely circular manner and start combating the misinformation on both fronts because it doesn't matter what origin someone has when it comes to validity or existence. What matters is the misinformation being spread by BOTH sides.

#syscourse #anti endo #pro endo #anti misinformation

[yanderes-galore]

I looked at your rules page and it looks like you're writing for FNAF again? If so may I request prompts 52, 61, and 46 (from the prompt list you made) for a Withered Bonnie x Technician!Darling?

I'll see what I can do :) Remember, No haunted kids as usual.

Sorry for the long wait! Animatronic or android, doesn't matter.

Yandere! Withered Bonnie Prompts 52, 61, 46

"My world's covered in darkness without you!"

"Being alone is worse than you hating me."

"Even monsters can love, can't they...?"

Pairing: Romantic/Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Self-aware robot, Malfunctions, Slight violence, Manipulation, Delusional behavior, Implied kidnapping.

Static crackled in his sensors. His hearing was muffled and glitching at the slightest sounds. The crippled bot tried to move but his joints only clicked.

He can barely hear the voice but still tries to snap his head towards it. It isn't until you step in front of him he senses you. Even then it's minimal.

"Woah, calm down over there buddy. You're not even supposed to be on yet. I have assessed what I need to fix."

The bot then tries to speak. You jump when static is all that comes out. He's frustrated but finds your reaction funny.

"Alright... let's try to turn you off for now- It's obvious you need a new arm, faceplate, visual sensors, audio sensors... wow they really wrecked you, huh?"

He would laugh at your comment if he could. It's true, they used his parts to create a new bot. Now that the place was shutting down it seemed they were trying to get the older bots back in order. Why else would you be here in this room?

You don't know he's sentient yet talk to him out of habit. He tries his best to watch your every move out of curiosity. A feeling of company after so many nights of loneliness.

That is until he feels you press something and his system shuts down.

---

Upon his next reboot he sees you again. Yes... his vision is still poor but other parts have improved. This is proven when he tries to speak again.

"H-ello."

It's still a broken voice, but it is a voice. You stop what you're doing and turn towards the bot you're working on. You look tired but relieved.

"Oh good... an improvement. Your ocular parts still need to come in along with the faceplate but... I may have the arm done soon...." You mutter to yourself, not expecting an answer.

"I-I can bar-ley see yo-u."

You step closer to examine his busted endo. You could barely call the red lights sockets. Yet you were close enough he could register your face somewhat.

"Hm..."

"N-Name?"

"Oh, right, the register function. Surprised that works still." You back up a bit and huff. "Just call me (Y/N). I am the mechanic and handler of the older robots."

You then turn around and mumble to yourself. He could barely hear you with his audio damage.

"I'm spread way too thin... this one has the most damage other than the chicken-"

His code registers an uncharacteristic form of sympathy towards you. You're so tired from your job. He wants to be better, to no longer be nearly blind or deaf.... Your state seemed to make his code stutter and emulate strange emotions towards you.

Emotions...?

"That's enough for tonight." You yawn. With that, it's lights out.

He thinks he likes you.

---

Just when he thought the darkness and loneliness would consume him, you grace him with your presence. With new improvements it appears....

He can hear and feel another arm. His voice?

"Hello a-gain."

Needs improvement but it'll do.

"Hello, Bonnie. Looks like the arm works... can you hear me?"

"Y-Yes."

"Great, that works too."

He clicks his head towards you writing in a journal. His vision may be poor but he still can make out you. You look so... nice.

Bonnie finds himself shuffling off the table onto his metal feet. This causes you to swing around to him with slight fear. He doesn't mean to scare you.

"Uhhh... Bonnie, return to the table-"

"(Y/N)... y-you are ti-red."

"Can't do much about that-"

"Y-You can re-st."

"No I can't- Why am I talking to you...."

Bonnie tilts his head, lack of faceplate staring back at you. He wanted to help you like you helped him. Slowly but surely, you're building him again.

For that... he likes you.

Loves you even.

That's the emotion, right?

"Maybe there was a reason you were deactivated... you're eager. I need to be more careful-"

You pull out a remote. A shut off switch for repairs. Bonnie panics, going to grab it before you pull away.

He doesn't want to leave you yet!

He makes a swipe towards you in desperation. Metal claws nearly graze you before you press the button. Just like that, Bonnie's sensors shut down.

You begin to wonder how safe these repair sessions are now.

---

Your safety has been compromised. While trying to fix up Bonnie's voice box he had malfunctioned. Your remote was crushed in his metal hands and you had to run out of the room.

Bonnie didn't understand why you ran.

"(Y/N)? Cottontail? Don't run from me...."

The voice box was repaired but his "fur" was still patchy. He had no face or eyes and his endoskeleton remained exposed in various places. He looked terrifying.

You just needed to hope his vision was as horrible as you thought.

"Please come out..." The robot pleads, each step giving off a click of his joints. "My world's covered in darkness without you!"

He meant that quite literally. He was nearsighted with his damaged eye units. Whenever you came into view, you lit up his vision.

You were so nice to help him. He wants to show he cares.

Yet you keep running away.

He stumbles around the dark pizzeria, you had come after hours to work on the robots for relocation. You hide silently in one of the party rooms, a red glow shining through the door of the room.

"Cottontail... please don't be scared. I only wish to care for you."

He steps into the room, trying hard to scan the area. He can barely make out anything.

"Being alone is worse than you hating me...." The voice box buzzes out near you, the large rabbit bot turning until red lights stared at you. You thought he wouldn't see you.

"There you are, my cottontail...."

"Don't call me that, monster! You're glitching! Stay away from me!"

You go to scramble away but Bonnie swipes at you before you leave his poor vision. You feel cold metal dig into you before pulling you closer. The body of the robot feels fuzzy and worn once you collide with it.

"Monster...? You think I am a monster?"

The tone that buzzes out sounds saddened.

"I only wish to show you how thankful I am. I want to show you I love what you do for me... that I love you."

Something sparks within him, scaring you. When you scream he tilts his head. You lean back when he stiffly leans forward, voice box crackling one more phrase.

"Even monsters can love, can't they...?"

#yandere five nights at freddys #yandere fnaf #yandere fnaf 2 #yandere withered bonnie

[anti-endo-safe-space]

one thing I really hate about endos is the problems they cause for actual systems. Like, yes that sums up the entirety of endos, but this is what I mean:

Our system is fictive HEAVY (10 fictives) and we often feel really bad about it because endos tend to also be fictive heavy.

the thing is, the reason why we’re fictive heavy is we were TAUGHT by our guardians to cope through fantasy. You’re sad? Read a fairy tale! You’re being abused by a sibling? Watch this TV show to take your mind off it!

we have had no other way to cope but through fiction since we were young, and as a system, that presents as introjects. So I can never tell people about my system because of this, because endos who consist primarily of fictives have created the stigma that systems either only have a few fictive or they’re faking.

We have been medically recognized (don’t have the money for a diagnosis but we have been told by multiple professionals that we are an OSDD 1-b system, but we can’t be medicated and it isn’t on legal documents). I’m so sick and tired of Endos stealing our entire sense of security because they want to have Dream in their head

I'm so sorry you've gotta deal with that.

We get the stigma around saying your fictive heavy (over half of us are fictives) because that was all you were taught to do. And since endos decided they want to claim it as their own, we end up screwed over.

I hope you can find some systems or friends or anything you can say your a fictive heavy system around, there is nothing wrong with y'all. Y'all are a system and we love y'all (/p)

We get the medically recognized only, so are we. Y'all are strong and can get through this, I promise

#anti endo #did system #dissociative system #osdd system #polyfrag system #sysblr #system #anti endo supporter #endos aren't real #endos dni #endos fuck off #osddid #did osdd #actually traumagenic #traumagenic #traumagenic system #dissociative identity disorder #actually system #actually dissociative #did alter #actually plural #actually did #plural system #we aren't big fans of saying plural now #but it's how we work #endos do not interact

[system-of-a-feather]

Man, this will go a bit into syscourse probably, but I was just watching Monkey Man and it really had me thinking (and internally groaning) about how gender "weirdness" is really something that is not weird at all in a lot of non-white non-european cultures. Shiva in Hinduism is a great example.

It's just when you get weird white people who come in and say "well you see, my understanding of gender is actually correct and the right way to think and talk about gender and I am inherently the most correct and right and smartest way of talking about gender and everyone else is just a cultural / spiritual game and should stay within their culture because its wrong but we 'respect' it and let it be wrong"

And it really got me internally ranting about how honestly - and I was trying to be a bit subtle about this cause I know it'd probably get back lash - but as a person of color from a culture and spirituality / philosophy that has plurality and variants of it normalized - the fact that people claim that the only way a person could experience themselves as more than one being due to trauma really really upsets me, because its a very white / western / european way of thinking about the concept of self, identity, personhood, and the soul.

In some cultures, people are understood as inherently many or inherently parts of a whole. It is just something that is just a part of the culture - may that be subtly and in a non-spoken manner, or in a more direct manner in the way that animism and buddhism talks about it. People can and do experience themselves as more than one and have been doing so since long before people were really aware of what psychology even was.

The fact that people talk about how individuals experience themselves inherently in a white, western, euro-centric cultural perspective that writes off "not identifying as one singular person" as something that HAS to come from trauma just really.... kinda pisses me off.

And if the argument is "well they shouldn't be called a system cause its a totally different thing than what people with DID / OSDD have" like... really, why are we getting so hot and bothered over the fucking word "system" and two... I can't delineate where my DID and my cultural plural-adjacent experiences begin and end. And also three, if we are getting so protective over the word "system" then why aren't we getting mad at the guy who developed IFS too??

It's also just so frustrating that people look at people who identify as more than one and inherently go "oh they are only doing this because they looked at my disorder and said they wanted it" when??? no??? Sure there are some I'm sure, but again, this is something people have been experiencing for centuries - hell more than a millenia.

As someone with DID / OSDD, I get the need for protecting the medical label and the diagnosis and all that because yes, while the psych system sucks, the medical labels are medical to get help, aid, and all sorts of stuff - absolutely.

But going around stating that anyone that experiences themselves as more than one is inherently either traumatized or maliciously lying and trying to actively co-opt a disorder is just.... ugh. Not it.

Please consider that there are other cultures and perspectives to identity, self, and spirit that impact how one identifies and engages with their own existence before you start sounding like a colonizer.

-----

Anti-endos are welcome to respectfully discuss and engage.

Arguments and debates are not welcome and will be blocked.

This is partially me venting about white / western people. Do with this as you will.

#alter: fei #alter: riku #syscourse #syscourse tw #vent #vent tw #pro endo #endo friendly #endo safe