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#yet this took me like 2 hours to find all the videos and cut them and make them into gifs
Citra emulator: Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney trilogy
A hopefully comprehensive guide on all the malfunctions ive run into so far. Because honestly, ive recommended aa on citra to so many people, the least i can do is give yall a guide for when you run into problems.
Spoilers under the cut for aa1 (rise from the ashes mostly).
1. Ema's aluminum finger print powder (Rise from the ashes)
In the final case of the first game you meet the Skye sisters. Lana is the Chief Prosecutor and Ema is a high school student who wants to become a forensics scientist. In her guest to prove her sisters innocence Ema will employ a couple of tools like Luminol blood splatter detecting spray and finger print detecting powder.
How does the aluminum powder work? You click on a suspicious surface. Make sure to cover all of the fingerprint with white powder/pixels!
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And then what? This is an emulation of a Nintendo game. You are prompted to blow in your mic to blow off the powder and reveal the fingerprint. But well. You can't exactly do that now can you?
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How can you get around this?
Maybe if you have a mic you could connect it to your laptop/pc and blow there but i don't know if that would actually work since i don't have a mic and therefore can't give it a try. But theres a way to get around this obstacle! A way that took me like an hour and a lot of research in ace attorney and emulation related forums to find 😭.
You will have to go on the top left corner of your screen and open the configuration option. I think.
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Now as you can see my program is in greek which is not exactly making this easier to understand for the rest of you. But nonetheless we will persevere!
What you have to do is go Configuration -> sound -> microphone -> real device ??? It must say something like that. It might take you a little bit of trial and error but you can find it. Try a few of these choices and see which one works. This will make your laptop/pc pick up on the games music and use it to "blow away" the powder by itself. Problem solved <3
2. Playing connect the dots with Ema's name (Rise from the ashes again)
In the final day of the trial we have a piece of evidence that almost everyone hates: that goddamn jar. Aside from its ridiculous resemblance to that monstrosity the blue badger when you rotate it in a highly specific way, this jar holds yet another secret. And that secret is a name written in blood that seems to have been wiped off. We are asked to "connect the dots" to prove whose name is written there. Normally connecting the dots would make red lines appear on the jar that make up Ema's name but well. If this worked as intended i wouldn't be making this post now would i.
When playing in Citra the lines won't show up. Nevertheless, you can still beat this new obstacle: just connect the dots anyway. Be extra careful: you don't want to forget one of the smaller ones. If you connect them all and present the evidence in court the game will progress as it should. Personally, when i was playing i kept forgetting to connect the top right dot in M and got penalised a few times too many over it. I suggest starting from the bottom of E and progressing carefully from there.
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Ema's name wiped off the jar's surface.
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Ema's name after you've connected the dots or how it would look if citra hadn't messed that one little detail up.
Aaaand those are all the malfunctions i stumbled upon on aa1. Honestly, could be worse. And they were both on the same case too, so maybe there won't be any more trouble in the rest of the trilogy games. But if i find any more i will come back and update this post. It will probably take a while tho, im very slow when it comes to video games.
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jennilesl · 5 months
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My latest project complete
Progress Report for Molten Ironworks
What is working?
So, this past week I took to the streets so to speak and went to a ton of businesses in town with my business cards, my promo video, and a bit of confidence. I met and shook hands with a lot of the business owners in town, put my business cards in multiple high traffic areas around town. I spoke to 2 of the art galleries and a local vendors market where I can rent a shelf for $65 for a month, which I'm seriously considering doing for the month of December for hopefully some Christmas sales.
What is not working?
Again, despite all my effort to meet people and get my name and my card out into the community, I don't have any new clients for the welding repair yet. But I'm still hopeful of drumming up some more business before the close of this course, I just might have to get more creative with promoting myself and the business.
How is the project coming?
I feel like I'm really starting to find my creativity again, it's starting to come more naturally, and I have a few different creations in the works. The most recent one I completed is featured in the picture above. It took me about 3 hours in total to create this, from rusted scrap metal I acquired from one of my neighbors. I cleaned it all up, cut and fit and recut and refit pieces until I was satisfied with the positioning of everything. I then welded everything solid, cleaned it up with my grinder and dremal, then polished everything until it shone. Now that its complete, I have another unique nature scene that I can take ideas from later as well and recreating it won't take me nearly as long.
What am I learning about running my business?
Time management. I always seem to underestimate how long a project might take me, and just how much work really goes into these art pieces. It's not as simple as welding it all together there's a lot of time and thought and planning that goes into each piece. Also, while taking to the art galleries, I learned so much about what people are looking for in terms of size and style, what sells really well there and what tends to stay on their shelves and walls longer before being bought. I also have a much better idea about pricing my pieces to the public, and what swings people in favor to your art.
What am I learning about myself?
I am really starting to see just how motivated I am to own and operated my own business. Every day is a learning opportunity, and I am taking in as much of it as I can. I am starting to get really confident in myself and my promotion and marketing. I'm getting a feel for how to approach people and how to keep them engaged or interested. I'm finding new and creative was and places to promote my business and myself and meeting a lot of interesting people and connections along the way.
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realsorcerershit · 1 year
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How the hell did you P-Rank P-2 so fast I suck balls at this game. I was able to P-Rank P-1 yet I literally had to turn on Major Assists just to get past that room with the Stalker.
Honest, genuine answer - I've put an obscene amount of time into this game. Something like 133.9 hours on steam right now. But - outside of that, there's a lot of like - little nitty gritty bits and pieces to it all, so if you want, I'll do a written guide under a read more? For anyone unaware - spoilers will be under the cut here. And, sorry if it's long - I have way too many thoughts about all of this, and do actually want to help as much as I can!
So - for reference, here, I actually have a video that I uploaded, which I'll use to reference? I'll try to refer to rooms as much as possible to be descriptive and whatnot, too! Video reference here. The name of the game here is threat analysis, and finding ways to keep yourself alive. What worked for me might not work for you, and vice versa.
Quad Cerberus: The name of the game for this room was speed. The upcoming Ferryman and Virtue spawn makes this one require you to go fast, so - I instantly open with a core eject + malicious railcannon nuke, dashing to avoid the damage as I shoot the nuke. This puts all of the Cerberus' to less than half HP, making projectile boosts and rocket usage the way to go to finish them all off. Then, it's all about setting up a quick sawcon trap to kill the Ferryman as soon as I can. For the double Virtues, I do my usual strat for virtue killing - shotgun swapping, punch with red arm, use whiplash to close the distance.
Double Sentry + Mindflayer 1 + Swordsmachine: For this fight - I took a look at what would be the most instantly lethal to me, in particular, for this fight. That would be the double Sentries in the back. Luckily, the Swordsmachine also spawns between them, so I go to the side where one of the Sentries spawn, charge up a slab revolver piercing shot, and follow it immediately up with a blue railcannon. From there, it's just cleaning up whatever's left. Sawcon to finish the Swordsmachine, too. If at any point, the ability to parry the Mindflayer's bullets shows up, take it. It's a free health and stamina refill. This applies all the way til the double idol room.
Hallway Cerberus + Double Streetcleaner: Once again, this is a case of threat analysis. The Cerberus needs to go first, immediately. I personally do a double railcoin setup to kill it fast - but if you can't pull that off, piercing slab revolver + blue railcannon + friendly fire damage from the Mindflayer should be enough. Finish off the streetcleaners last in any way possible, then move on.
Double Idol Mindflayer, Pack 1 (Sentry + 2x SM): Once again, the Sentry is your biggest threat due to lack of cover. However, you can just stun it with a revolver shot, and then set up saws to kill the Swordsmachines passively - keep moving to avoid the Sword swipes. This one's a lot harder to explain and just ends up looking messy no matter how you do it, and this one just takes practice.
Pack 2 (2x Virtue, 2x Maurice): My biggest enemy here, imo, are the virtues, just due to the beams they fire that stun you. So, whiplash to them with the shotgun out, and shotgun swap while punching with the red arm to kill em off quickly. Repeat the same strat for the Maurices, then break the statues.
2x Mindflayer: At last, the double mindflayers. My goal is to just - kinda also shotgun spam them. That said, if I can find the window to safely instakill one with the malicious railcannon (the timing is right as their homing bullets spawn - shoot with malicious railcannon and they instantly die) I'll take it. Don't worry about your health too much going into this - punching the idols will heal you.
2x Insurrectionist: Good lord this pack sucks for me. However, with the addition of the SRS Cannon, you can now stun one of them, which is really helpful. Make sure to set up a sawcon on them, and spam projectile boosts to keep them on fire. They take more damage while on fire, as it's a weakness. Outside of that, just continue to move, do not stop, and use the big railcannon when you can as well. I believe whiplashing the skull into them also sets them on fire, too? Don't quote me on that.
Spinning Blood Lake 1 (2x Virtue, 2x MF, 1x Sentry): This is another game of just stun the sentry first, then kill whatever leaves an opening. In the uploaded run, I snipe with blue railcannon, then use the shotgun on the virtues, re-stun the sentry with the revolver, then finish up and move on. THis one requires practice and is very open ended on how you solve it - don't be afraid to fall if you need to just get somewhere for health regen.
Spinning Blood Chamber 2 (2x Cerb, 2x Sentry, 1x MF): This room sucks and killed at least 20 runs for me. My strategy ended up being whiplashing to the Sentries to punch them off the cliff ASAP, whiplashing to the Maurice to kill THAT next, then just plinking at the Cerberus' from afar until they died. Again, it's open ended, but I think that's the most ideal threat priority.
Stalker room, wave 1 (4x Stray, 2x Swordsmachine, 1x Ferryman): The name of the game here is to continue moving, and do not STOP moving. I set up a Sawcon trap in the middle to get free plink damage on the Swordsmachines and the Ferryman, and ultimately ignore the Stray until it's convenient for me to kill them. The name of the game is to keep pulling the enemies away from the Stalker, so that they don't get sanded, so you can maintain health regeneration.
Stalker room, wave 2 (4x Sentry, 1x Idol, 1x Hideous Mass): The name of the game here is to time your dashes with the shots that you cannot cancel - and use the red fist religiously to cancel as many shots as you can in combination with the Whiplash. As long as you're moving rapidly, the Hideous Mass cannot hit you, and that's what's most important. Getting locked down by the tail claw is a total death sentence. Punching the tether, if you get stuck, with the red fist, does get rid of it, though.
Stalker room, wave 3 (3x Virtue, 4x Cerberus): Here, we really have the thing of nightmares. However, one thing becomes safe: The Idol protecting the Hideous Mass opens up, and that can be immediately punched if you're in danger of death for a free health refill. That said, I take to the sky immediately with the Whiplash, killing off the three Virtues with my usual method, shotgun swap, red fist punch. Then, while I'm in the air and falling down, I set up sawblades on the underbelly of the Hideous Mass (breaking the Idol was the first thing I did, also worth mentioning), letting those do passive damage to both it and the Cerberus'. Follow it all up with staying far away from the Cerberus' to give myself time to react to their attacks, punch the idol, kill the Stalker, and then FINALLY it's time for the PANOPTICON.
PANOPTICON: Not too much to talk about here. Just - immediately whiplash up to kill the eyes, use the pistol on the face that spawns, high speed circle strafe around the PANOPTICON while doing as much damage to it as possible. The big thing for this one is find a way to avoid its explosive lobbing that works for you, I'd say?
SISYPHUS PRIME: Here, I adopted a strat similar to how people P rank Minos Prime nowadays - sawcon setup during the cutscene. Use the pistol to break a single nail when possible. When you're ready, do a double/triple railcoin through him, and then continue to bait him into saws. I panicked a bit in the video, as you can see, when the coins didn't kill, but. That's the hardest part. Just find a high DPS route in your own way!
Holy shit this was so long. I'm so sorry. I do hope that this helps a lot, though! And don't beat yourself up about having to use major assists - these are some of the most fucked up enemy patterns that exist in the game, in conjunction with excessively difficult room design. Genuinely, it's tough. Even making it to this fight is a massive accomplishment.
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annakie · 9 months
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So, some thoughts and screenshots on the first few hours of BG3 --
Indyara is my Half-Elf Bard. She's a character I have played in several D&D games, wanting to find a game where her backstory mattered and we actually finished the game. I'm actually in that game right now, playing every other Saturday morning, though there was one other game it... almost worked out for her.
Bard is my favorite D&D class, going back to when I played one in a 3/3.5e game for several years in the early 2000's, and I played BG1 & 2 with one.
Decently high CHA (16) but not sacrificing INT, DEX, and CON (14) while having a bad WIS (9) and STR (8). Let's see how that works out for her.
High Half-elf for that sweet CHA bonus and getting Firebolt, so I have an actual useful damaging cantrip. (Do not ask me for my diatribe about why everyone is wrong about Vicious Mockery being a good spell unless you want an earful.)
Absolutely fuming that they still are leaving the version number up and it's visible in screenshots. Cannot believe that oversight. Also that they leave menu buttons visible in cutscenes, what the fuck Larian? Found out last night that apparently hitting f10 should stop that, but that removes the entire UI and obviously you need to turn it back on. But for now my entire first day's of screenshots and videos look like ass and I'm mad about it.
Lots of screenshots and commentary below the cut. I didn't make it too far in-game and honestly I don't talk about the plot much.
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Hey, look lady, we're both stuck here. Indy is very patient and diplomatic, whatever it takes to make it through every day as unscathed as possible, but this one might try that patience. At least she's useful. Let's see if we can make a friend.
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Indy did save Shadowheart from her pod, but the way she and Lae'zel bicker is already giving her a headache.
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Well this certainly is a development, and I'm sure whoever these two are will be completely unimportant in the hours to come.
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I told myself I wasn't going to savescum when I failed a roll, but look, I'm not about to let Indyara Nat 1 on a CHARISMA check about magic when she very first meets the future love of her life. I reloaded this one.
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Indy's initial impression on meeting Gale: a few seconds of "Wait, THIS is the one I'm going to fall in love with?" met with "Oh. I get it." a few seconds later. Very smart, polite, charming and funny? Sign me up, please.
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Plus, we look great in screenshots together.
(Indy's hair is definitely lighter in sunlight than I intended, her hair was supposed to be brown with pink streaks (for bardic flair) but it comes out looking dark honey in direct sun. Ah well.)
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A few minutes later though "Wait, this one is as charming and me, and extremely heroic? Are you SURE we made the right choice? They're both great. Can't we have them both?"
(Sorry Indy, we don't need two high-CHA characters in the main party. He's saved for another playthrough.)
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Oh come ON. This isn't fair. Another one?
Poly mod... when? Or at least a list of who is officially OK with poly in-game? Shadowheart is growing on me, too, after a bit of a rough introduction.
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I'm sorry, Astarion. I already took a level dip in rogue to be the party trap/lock skill monkey since we're bringing along the Wizard, Cleric and, for now at least, the fighter. (We'll see how long that lasts. This game needs more tank companions. Though I don't mind companions that are challenging, generally.)
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I love having a camp again. Need better camp clothes, though, for all of us. I did do the Twitch Stream unlock thing, but haven't found those rewards in-game yet. Anyone?
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Literally already started unlocking the Gale romance by the time I was just wandering around the Emerald Grove area. He loves almost every decision I make and I'm glad of it.
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...of course there's a catch.
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Hahahaha holy shit, Volo! I love being a bard in this game and loved bullshitting Volo, and he loved knowing he was getting bullshitted.
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See, wasn't this a nice time, ladies, listening to this other bard sing? Let's have less bickering, more listening to Bards. <3
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Astarion... I'm just not into Vampires. At least not with this character. Still, I like you. I wish I could have offered to help him find food here instead of just sending him away, but I let him down easy.
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Indy found a cute hat at camp and is wearing the FUCK out of it. I mean look at her! And it helps with song of rest! (though it does considerably shorten her hair, but hey, it's a MAGIC hat so that's just part of the magic.)
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I've played a Larian game or two before so I picked up Speak with Animals as one of my first level spells and do not regret it. However, I feel like I didn't help this Owlbear enough, though I let her and her cub be. Probably missed out on something cool here. Again, I'll pick it up in another playthrough. I'm trying to not google for answers to every puzzle this time and just play through blind.
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OH HOLY SHIT WHAT DID I WALK IN ON. I'M SO SORRY FOR YOU AND FOR ME.
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Oh no, Gale is into some other woman... oh wait that's Mystra. I get it, you're a wizard. And I'm a smart Lore bard who's also very into magic so uh, let's make some magic happen? Also, sorry we got this cutscene when Gale was at like 2hp so he's all bruised up. I love that it shows on the character models though.
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Ohhh wait you DO want to make magic together? I'm down with that, and got to put bardic flourishes on all my responses to Gale's instructions. I LOVE this game, I LOVED this scene. Though I hate what the magic VFX did to Indy's face here.
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Oh my God, is this the first flirt scene!?! Tell me it's the first flirt scene!!
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I imagined slipping my hand into his hand on a romantic walk and... he liked it. This was very, very sweet. And getting to flirt over a shared love of magic was... *chef's kiss*
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I'm also making great progress with Shadowheart. Okay, we can be BFFs. <3
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Things to come indeed, Gale.
----
In Early Access I didn't get very far and honestly I think last night I made it about as far as I ever made then, or close to it. I basically went "Whelp I love this game, I don't want to spend my time playing through this now when I can go through it fresh later in like a year." (and then it was THREE, but that's fine.)
I'm fighting Phase Spiders but fuck that, I might come back when we all hit level 4. That fight sucked. I am trying to make "good" choices but have probably really screwed some stuff up. i feel bad that Astarion and Wyll get left at camp but they don't fit into my party makeup (I think I'll do a Paladin next and bring both of them along instead of Gale and Lae.)
Absolutely love all of the chances to shortcut quests and fights by Barding / persuading / lying my way out of it. So few things I don't love so far, though I definitely feel like I'm stumbling my way through the dark, not knowing if I'm doing the right things.
Can't wait to do almost nothing this weekend but play BG3. A full day of work, first, though. :(
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I’m honestly not sure whether linking the video would be better, or not because fuck that guy, I don’t want to give him views, even to make a point.
Your Overwatch posted a video just a few hours ago, and it has by far his most egregious takes yet. The guy has been on a high rise freefall ever since the monetization schemes for Overwatch 2 were announced prior to release, but this video of his really took the fucking cake, I gotta say.
He literally cut in a clip from Seagull’s stream where he points out that an in-game keychain charm costs more than its real world equivalent. Let that fucking sink in. A real keychain costs less than a digital one. And this clown had the gall to go on and defend it.
He goes on to say, and this is a direct fucking quote:
“I’m personally kind of tired of talking about this when there’s such a good game in front of us to play, and to some degree, if I can’t convince you that these skins in the Overwatch Battlepass are far higher quality, more imaginative, more creative, more transformative...I think players sometimes forget that’s almost like designing an entirely separate character.”
Never mind the quality of the skins since, for the sake of fairness, that’s up to the individual (personally, I think the only good skins in the BP are the D’Va and Pharah ones), but his argument here is that because he believes these skins are ‘better’ than the skins we used to get in OW1, that makes them worth a premium.
Regarding the premium skins you can buy from the store he said, and this is a paraphrase: “Since we’ve already learned most people don’t even play 3 different heroes a majority of the time, why would you buy a premium skin for a hero you don’t even play?”
This is, of course, completely disregarding the most basic fact that this is a hero shooter where one of the quintessential elements of gameplay is having to swap heroes to effectively counter the enemy team. Granted, sure, you could get away without doing that, assuming you’re a decent enough player, but we don’t live in Wonderland where everyone is Grandmaster. We live in the real world where sometimes you have to pick an off hero you might not like, or might not typically play, all for the sake of winning. Just because you’re usually playing ~3 specific heroes doesn’t mean you’re not playing any of the other heroes ever.
All of that was of course so he could ‘defend’ Blizzard charging AAA video game prices, we’re talking ~$60-70 per-skin, because in his mind, you’re only buying the skins for the heroes you like, so that gives Blizzard the justification to fleece you for all you’re worth for those few skins you purchase.
He also just blatantly lied, or is willfully ignorant when he argued that lowering the prices in the shop wouldn’t encourage more people to buy them, when that’s so completely and provably false. Look at just about any mobile game ever and you will immediately see just how wrong that is. It’s infinitely easier to convince people to buy 4-6 skins at $10-15 per-skin than it is to convince them to buy a single skin for $60. This man’s ignorance knows no bounds.
And all of this was in the segment of his video where he’s literally discussing a survey that was sent out by Blizzard regarding monetization because even they are noticing that people really find their monetization scheme to be complete and utter bullshit. And none of this even touches his horrifically bad takes on the actual meta itself.
This is just further proof that people give, not only YouTubers, but ‘pro-players’ far too much credibility when it comes to discussing the design of the game. These people shouldn’t be the voices of the people playing these games because 9/10 they are completely detached from the playerbase they claim to represent, case-in-point this utter clown. Games shouldn’t be designed around the sub-1% of the playerbase.
It’s truly bewildering to me that games are designed around pro-players when the entire concept of being a professional player of a video game is that you are someone who is actually good at the game and not someone who the game was built to be good for. Instead, games should be focused on making it fun for the vast majority of players, and the people who are paid to get good at the game should, you know, actually get good at the game instead of having their every need catered to.
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lucysweatslove · 2 years
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Updates? Yeah, life updates.
The Tech concert was good. He’s a goofy dude and you can tell he just really has fun with it. Husband got smashed and had a grand ol’ time. I took a ton of videos for him.
Because of the concert yesterday, I was very clear at work that I could NOT stay late which ended up causing problems. Usually this is fine, but a) we had a late scheduled patient, b) my trainee is still working on speed, and c) literally at like 5:15 my entire workstation stopped connecting to work apps or anything on google chrome or whatever the edge thing is that replaced IE. I could access the EMR but no videos or email or even IT help. I was on my phone trying to connect and figure it out. Eventually I got it half working but I had to leave then. We had 4 notes left, one I was working on, one my trainee was working on, and two ones we hadn’t even found media for yet. My trainee said she would work on the notes herself and I could review in the morning…
I woke up early and clocked into work before I’m normally awake to finish up yesterday’s work, right? My trainee has done one extra note, staying late to do it, which was great of her, but that still meant I had to do one new note on a very long visit with a patient with a complex history, finish up the note I had started when my computer did the weird connection thing, AND THEN also review my trainee’s other two notes. It’s not a quick process because I have to fix anything missed and she’s still learning. And this doc is literally taking like an hour to do her visits.
Anyway I started work at 8 AM when I normally start at 10, and I finished getting ready for today’s clinic writing about 10:30 and then tried to find media… no media. I was stressed because this doc had a very busy AM hearing loss clinic (about twice as many patients as usual), and while she normally just does the AM clinic on those days, she also added in a busy PM clinic in person. It was just me + my trainee. Other staff who work with that doc were scheduled to only work a half day and deal with a full clinic themselves + help with another clinic, too.
Anyway, I got in touch with my supervisor who said the doc doing the hearing clinic was taking those calls during her commute into work and thus wasn’t using our services in the AM. Which was great because that meant I could work on the other doc’s clinic for my coworker who wasn’t scheduled all day.
My coworker was actually super grateful because she was a little stressed, worrying how she would be able to finish her clinic. We don’t usually have days like today with 3+ providers in with full clinic schedules.
During my PM clinic, it turned out a resident was working, and this resident is highly competent and does notes like they’re supposed to!! Which was amazing. Out of 8 patients, we only were responsible for 2 of them, so my trainee got to to both!
While trainee was working in those notes, I was able to help out with the other two clinics.
During all of this, I was SO NAUSEATED and dizzy and running to the bathroom frequently. If I move my eyes, I get sick. Imagine trying to type and listen and watch a video when you want to vomit every time you move your eyes. 0/10.
Overall I worked for ~10 hours, minus maybe 45 min or so total for breaks when I absolutely needed. It was worth it though because nobody else on my team needed to stay late or cut into study time. If I hadn’t needed to come in early to resolve issues stemming from tech failure yesterday, it would’ve been just a normal day at work.
Now I’m still feeling really sick. No fever or anything. Still not sure what’s causing the dizziness. I have tomorrow off which is nice, but I still have a ton to do so it won’t really be a restorative day. I have heard back from all MD schools now, and have gotten secondary invites from all of them except one which is still reviewing my primary app. UNR and WWAMI came in yesterday, and I was working a little on my UNR app since it’s due next Tuesday, and I had to email them to ask about my sister (current resident; unsure if that makes her a UNR student or not). They haven’t gotten back to me which is *frustrating* but oh well.
Tomorrow’s goals re: med school-
Get my official voter registration certificate thingy so I can upload it.
Finish the app to verify my MT residency status for all the programs that need it verified.
UNR application. It’s fewer essays like Mayo, but it’s also *not Mayo* and essays are max 300 words instead of 500. I think I have 6-7 essays? I can’t remember as I didn’t formally count them and I know some are optional. But 7 essays at 300 words- probably a few hours? Maybe 4?
If time, U of Utah application. They have a lot more in depth stuff- like I have to put in all my activities again but they ONLY want stuff within the last 5 years. They make it sound like a positive because “some students have to select their top 15 activities.” I’m like… or some students don’t even have 15 real quantified activities to begin with because they have one activity spanning a long period of years. Honestly this really worries me because I’m non-trad, even tho I have amazing ties to the state and school in general (would be the third generation to complete any medical Ed there- my gpa did a fellowship and dad did resident).
I doubt I’ll have time after that but if I do, probably U of Arizona applications. They have two campuses done individually, so Tucson first and maybe Phoenix if a lot of the app is the same. Otherwise the Phoenix campus has a much later true deadline and I’ll want to prioritize WSU and WWAMI.
OHSU and then U of Minnesota (both campuses) and then WWAMI and then WSU (since they got back to me later I have a little more unofficial time to complete those).
Yeah it’s gonna be a busy day tomorrow. I work Friday, so my weekend is gonna be packed too. I’m hoping- HOPING- that I can do UNR and U of Utah tomorrow and then for my final 14 apps (assuming U of Iowa offers me a secondary), if I can do them in 3 hours each, I can effectively finish 6-8 this weekend. That would put me through everything officially due before mid-November at the earliest. While they really want you to send in secondaries two weeks after they’re offered, with full time work and literally no time to prepare bc they were offered so quickly, I have to prioritize. So schools I have less ties to are going to be submitted later since I have less chance of getting in those places.
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doomboogie · 2 months
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Got through Ch 1 and Ch 2. Trying to even out my thoughts with gripes and praise but uhh so far mostly complaints. It feels very FFXV in a lot of ways that I don’t think are great! Nothing super coherent or clear yet in the critique department
My concerns were immediately founded . I hope this game can make me at least tolerate Zack since he’s obviously gonna be a major part of it and I’ve never been a fan. Remake made me change some of my reception to other characters so it’s certainly possible!
Repeating NPC dialogue still sucks, but that’s not unique to FF. Still annoying.
Zangan is interesting and I’m really wanting more of him! I like his design a lot.
Don’t like the addition of Aerith chiming in on “You asshole!” when Cloud goes through Tifa’s room, I liked when it was just Tifa in the demo.
😞 they removed the sheet music from Tifa’s piano.
The audio mixing is still bad. The music is way too loud, even when manually adjusting in the options settings. Voices get drowned out
The acoustic guitar rendition of Tifa’s theme is really cute
I don’t mind the yellow shelf paint, because the game is already so visually busy it really needs to paint to stand out
As one half of my favorite YT video gamers, ChipCheezum, said: there is a level of nuance given to Sephiroth here that he usually isn’t given, and it is very refreshing to see
Pacing is a bit slow while crawling in the village. By a bit slow I mean way too slow
Cutting the camera away from Tifa showing her scar just made the scene funny, idk why they did that
Literally laughed out loud at the weather warfare conspiracy. I get that magic exists in this world but lmfao, yeah, Wutai controls the weather. Great cover story Shinra
I see a mysterious freak with a kind disposition and dying cough and I latch on, so Broden’s inevitable doom will break my heart.
I usually like remake Aerith fine but Christ she is very aggressive in her flirting and there’s no option to tell her no. I don’t care about the love triangle and never have so it’s just exhausting.
I spent all of Ch 2 with Red and Barret as my party because I got so tired of the romance shit with the girls in the opening scenes. Doesn’t seem to matter tho because party members never really say anything unless there’s a side quest they care about.
Red’s fun to play, I like his spins a lot! He still does the standing up roaring animation on battle end which is cute, and he rides a chocobo like a human shaped person which is also cute.
Animations are slow and overbearing. Not quite rdr2 levels but still enough to be annoying.
There’s a few seconds after moving from something or getting up from a bench when you cannot enter the start menu or save menu and it trips me up every time.
MAI. Is certainly a character. I turned her voice off (and by extension Chadley) because the one introduction was too much. Chadley is fine, Chadley is good. I did not need a worse version of him chittering in my ear during combat. It’s like they saw how (some) people like Purah and wanted to make their own.
There’s a lot going on mechanics wise and I think maybe there’s too much. Crafting, synergy moves, weapon abilities, folios, equipment leveling, materia, all on top of the combat system. I do not think this game needed crafting, tbh.
Fuck queen’s blood and fuck the side quest chain for it. Sorry Tifa, I’m not helping out this bartender because i don’t like this card game and your favored side quest requires me to play it.
The field and combat versions of Hollow are great, really liked those.
Fuck those moogles, man.
I hate the overfilled open world! Society has progressed past the need for open world in everything! What took 10 minutes in the original is now 10 hours - I don’t see how people can consider that a good thing when most of that time is wandering around doing fetch quests and gathering crafting materials. Unfortunately the only way to find out which quests are actually interesting is by playing them through. A burst pipe leading to a fast approaching energy crisis? Sounds interesting, too bad fucking Kyrie ruins it. A farmer’s cows are harassed by a monster? Sounds boring as fuck, but it leads to a questline shedding light on Junon’s history and Broden’s past, both of which are interesting and relevant to the story!
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hospitalterrorizer · 4 months
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diary107
12/29/2023
friday
here's a photo i found in a magazine on internet archive today that feels too apt to not put on tumblr dot com:
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anyway i emailed me resume to that kbbq place.. i can't wait to wash dishes and think about killing myself every day. i already do that but it's less, i dunno, meaningful, it's just like, yeah that's something that happens sometimes. maybe it'll just be that when i wash dishes again. it probably will be. i'm just a stupid dramatic bitch.
anyway that picture is really funny, it's too much, it's probably been posted like a million times, it's such perfect fodder for what people put up here usually.
anyway here's some other stuff i was finding from old gyaru fashion mags (looking for references for cover art):
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a very young girl thing of me to do, stare at fashion mags to absorb their ways of expressing / presenting reality, graphical means and so on. but i guess everybody is like that in their own ways. guys staring at old mde videos for inspiration are more young girls than me, at least i know these are kind of psycho. this is a vapid way to think but it's funny, which is why i am doing it.
mde is on the mind because my gf started watching fishtank recently. it seems mostly insane and evil, but that's fascinating to see so i get her watching it. it's the next generation of jerry springer, i think, or other shit like that. drama youtube and fishtank, that's the next generation of trashy reality tv. it's scary to me that this stuff just won't disappear, an evil impulse in spectacular societies, to not ever look away from these kinds of systems that make people behave certain ways, and to goad people into being insane to feel like you see the evil parts of culture or whatever. or not just evil, the ugly degenerate stuff, to feel like you can always sense that. fishtank really seems to love that for its 2nd season.
anyway sam hyde is such a piece of shit, too much breath here has been wasted on that freak pedophile.
anyway today, since i got to every song re: mixing finally, i decided to listen to the album as i have it rn, at first i was a little over an hour but i cut songs, now it's 48 minutes. i'll say there's room for +/- 1 min (really like 1 min 30 w/ short songs). but idk. i should see if i can shorten some of the songs here naturally, like if they have parts that repeat too much, take too long to get to their points, whatever. there's one song that's a maybe, it depends on if i can get it to sound right and find the right place for it. i love the song, so i want to keep it in the album. i should see if there's any short song rn that i don't want to keep, but i feel really attached to them all. actually there's another maybe too, both need to be placed right i think. they both kind of stick funny in the album. they need to fit in a bit better, idk how to do that w/ the second one but i like it a lot, there's just a part that's not right yet i think, in terms of how it sounds, it could be a bit crazier, louder, noisier maybe.
when i listened i took notes on some of the songs that needed special attention at the front of the record, i got through 6 of those, the list is of 8, so 2 more tomorrow and then i go through and listen again and try to see what else needs to change.
there's like 33 songs, so there's still a lot to get through but if i can maintain this pace/something like this pace, i'll be very happy.
right now i am just thinking about how my misanthropy comes in waves, but for a long time now, it's been given no reason to recede. something about pessimism is basically addictive but i don't think i'm in some mental-opiate haze, where i am, about people, at least some of them. it feels solidly under my feet, i know something totally pyrrhic, so many people i know, i have to keep asterisks on my relationships with them, because they just say awful things or reveal things. communist friends, even, maybe them especially. it's not about my feeling that i'm better even, it's just this overwhelming being used to finding out someone you know says "i'm glad (x) is transphobic too", to someone you know, a closer friend meeting someone from online. it's like, i knew he felt that way, i knew the person he was talking about felt that way too, my friend probably knew too, he is frustrated because it's stupid that anyone would decide to confide this in you. when pushed on it, this person who i guess is still basically something like a friend said "well it's because of andrea dworkin. it's feminist," which is so stupid and gross. i hate what radical feminism means now, or in the hands of people like that, i also hate that i basically know and expect this kind of thing from people who are close friends w/ this other friend (with asterisks) because she sort of becomes their whole moral/political compass because she's the kind of person who you want to agree w/ you or tell you that you're fine and whatever.
beyond this, other insane social failures that have left my friends, my closer ones who i don't have to put asterisks on, miserable and paranoid. not a terrible sort of paranoid, like this other guy i knew, who believed the satanic panic was real and all kinds of other shit. he also was vaguely transphobic, worried about the biopolitical consequences of hrt. seeing that problem and not questioning the broader circumstance that put us here, and instead accepting the reactionary assumption that this kind of thing is wasteful and dangerous from the jump, and feeding a fantasy or whatever. messing with your body is too far. he accepted people otherwise though, the paranoid guy, he was very catholic and maybe just not sure of things entirely. transphobic is ultimately only half right for these people, he really did accept people, when i told him about diy hrt, he was shocked and it seemed to change his mind on something, i couldn't tell what. but his obsession with child abuse cults and conspiracies broadly made him impossible to really talk to. he was also a communist. i am not complaining about communism, just expressing that these are not fascists.
i don't really know what i'm talking about. a lot of these people are just so frustrating. i don't know why they are like this.
i am getting tired now, so
byebye!!!!!!!!!!!
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chalkarts · 5 months
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MinE now: Part 2
Fluorescents. While not as luminous nor scorching as the sun they are somehow far more uncomfortable. The angry buzz and almost imperceptible pulsations give a parasitic life to the light. Colors washed out, joy leached away, a cubicle farm aglow. A dozen other military demotees and a few renamed protected witnesses that talk too much work endlessly to keep the wheels of bureaucracy grinding along as slowly as possible, the Smiths doing their due diligence. God Bless America.
His ass hasn’t even begun to heat up the cracked vinyl of my chair when It begins.
Lewis, lanky, loud, and far too chipper for the hour fires the first shot. “Hey Maggie! You do anything fun last night?”
Maggie…they all know. He doesn’t know who told them. but they all know.
“Are there actually fun things to do in Cleveland?” He snipes back.
“C’mon man, Cleveland Rocks!” A hard gaze informs him that his banter is unwelcome so he takes the rest of the conversation back to his cubicle.
The inbox is already full. File this paperwork in triplicate. This goes to the mailroom. Why did Drew give send this here when it’s clearly labeled for Oswald? The incompetence is staggering. Every day, noble gasses bathe government ineptitude in miserable radiance. Every day, here he is, begging for an end to it all. Morning becomes lunch then afternoon. It’s getting close to quitting time. Then go can go back to his studio apartment and watch vacation videos on YouTube.
A gravel road voice rocks the office. “Maggie!! Get in here!”
Maggie. he hates that it’s become the norm. He hates himself for responding to it.
From the tone of Boss's voice, it doesn’t sound great, but at least it’s something different. He pops up to peek over the top of his cube, like a mole hoping to be whacked. His eyes are locked on him, not his mustache, him. Making his way through the cubes toward the office, glances and smirks following him to the door.
“Sit down,” The door clicks, silence. Soundproofing that could muffle a massacre plunges them into solitude. His wispy combover prevents him from being any kind of intimidating. He suspects that the Boss keeps it for the same reason he lets a world war one hedge row grow from his upper lip. It’s distracting.
The Boss sits, leaning over his desk, bidding him do the same.
In hushed tones, “It’s no secret that you hate this place.”
He tries to look surprised by the assumption. He hoped he’d hidden it better than that, “No, I don’t hate it...”
“Oh stop,” he cuts him off, “We all hate this place. You, me, the Smiths out there, you aren’t special. But you, unlike most of us, have a chance to get out of here.” Jealousy consumes his scowl for a moment before giving way to his standard air of grump and truculence. “FLAG has an assignment for you. High risk, High reward. All I can tell you now is that if you succeed, you’ll be restored to rank and given a posting of your choice.”
The possibilities explode in his mind. Getting out of here, going anywhere he wants? That is the quintessential meaning of High Reward. But what does he mean by High Risk? 30% chance of success? Does he have to jump into a volcano without a wetsuit? Are there Badgers? What exactly does high risk mean? The only way to find out is to accept. He know how this works. This isn’t his first classified assignment. He can’t see the file or any of the details until he says yes. Accept the task sight unseen. Is the risk worth it? He might be hurt, killed, or worse yet slimed…but he might also get out of Cleveland.
“I’m in.”
“Good, this assignment actually comes down from your old boss.” He pulls a file folder from his desk and slides it across the glass. “Masters was hoping you’d take this. Personnel has been tight ever since Colonel Smith took his team and went AWOL.”
“Didn’t we have a B-team in place?”
“No, we never expected them to do what they did so we never thought to double up. Now they’re gone and we don’t know how to find them.”
“Damn…” They were good men. “I don’t know why they did it, but we’ll catch up to them someday. What about your Townsend girls? I know they’re usually your first call for this sort of thing.”
“They’re down in Mexico on assignment. Might not be back for weeks. Not to be a dick about it, but you’re our bottom of the barrel.”
He opens the file and starts the quest to leave Cleveland.
It’s a bit of a gut punch to see it. Hawaii…home. A satellite photo of the islands looks back at him. The black, tan, and green piles of firmament laid out in a row contrast against the monochrome blue of the Pacific. A million mixed memories pummel his heart with minute peeks into the past that he pissed away. To the south, circled on the map, an almost imperceptible speck.
“What’s this?”
“That’s what we want to know.”
on the next page a lone island sits dead center of the image.
“One of our analysts kids found it on Google Earth. Uncharted, no one even knew it was there. We figured, hey we found an uncharted Island, can we put missiles on it? So we focused our eyes in the sky on it. Damned if it wasn’t already inhabited.”
The next page is a closer view of the tiny speck of land. Several circular buildings of varying size bearing thatched roofs dot the island. Dirt paths carved through the jungle connect them to one another, and to a dock built on the southern point near a field of blue flowers. “Satellites show It’s surrounded by a dense coral reef, but you could get a boat in there, if you were good. You might even get a ship in there if you were amazing. We need to find out what’s going on there.”
“What, exactly, do you need me to do?”
“We need recon and potential clean up. We don’t know what this is.” an exasperated shrug accents his cluelessness. “It may be an uncontacted indigenous tribe, or it might be the center of a world spanning evil organization bent on burning the earth to flinders. We hope it’s the former but can’t rule out that it’s the latter until we get eyes on the ground. Which is where you come in. We airdrop you half a mile offshore, you scoot in and get us some intel. If it’s a tribe, make no contact, bug out fast. We don’t screw around with indigenous people any more. The sentinelese were a lesson learned. If they’re evil doers, proceed with whatever you feel is the necessary course of action.”
‘Wetwork?” It’s a good question to get out of the way. Being invisible is more difficult than no witnesses.
“Only if necessary, we’re not trying to start an international incident with a bloodbath.”
“Fair enough,” He never liked killing. It’s easy to do but hangs heavy on the heart. He tries not to show that it bothers him. In this line of work, Empathy isn't necessarily frowned upon, but it will not get you a promotion so he hides the sadness behind a ridiculous mustache and moves forward.
“Back-up?” He asks, not expecting much.
“You’ll have comms and a handler but nothing on the ground.”
“Weapons?”
“Whatever you can find. We don’t want a semi auto falling into the hands of uncontacted tribes so use what you can find on the island. If you’re going to need weapons, there will already be weapons there somewhere.”
He's been there before. Wearing an earpiece, a stranger telling him the layout and feeding him intel while he reports the details back to them. Hoping to find an arsenal, maybe a medkit. It’s all pretty standard. When he finishes looking over the maps and digesting the files only one question remains.
“When do I drop?”
“Tomorrow.” He says, handing over a plane ticket to Honolulu. "You should leave now. Your plane leaves at 6, you have 3 hours."
Fleeing the office, ticket in hand, he gives the cube farm a long desired, “Fuck you Lewis!” and hits the door.
A short bus ride, efficient shower, and long Lyft later, he's on his way home.
(To Be Continued)
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fate-tumbles · 10 months
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#LIVESTREAM
I just spent almost 2 hours writing what I thought would be one of my most favorite picture essays ever. And it had music and quotes and God knows what else in it.
Because I'll never know, because you'll never know, because Tumblr fucked up and it crash and didn't end up saving the draft. Or at least I couldn't find it.
But I came up with that idea and all my thoughts on it on the spot. And even in the raw form I felt like it represented me enough to share it because I knew the people who got it, would get it. Because I used too many references and layers, and some people can't fuck with onions.
And sometimes I start cutting my peppers instead because they feel more important at the time because that's how my brain used to work. But now I'm making it my bitch, since I know I'll always go back to the onions because I started there already. It's just not the right time for me to cut them now.
But I am capable of everything. And it's scaring me. Because now I want to live since I have so much to do, I'm wondering how I'll ever have enough time.
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After my three car accidents for various reasons, I have been telling my family that I will eventually die in a car crash. But there is a reason why I didn't yet. And depending on what car I was driving and what I was doing to pay for it however much I could, I was either so grateful to survive or so. Despondent to think that it couldn't have been so easy.
I've never had a threat of suicide because I've always been too fucking chicken to actually do it myself. I've always tried, but I know half heartedly even though I thought I meant it. Because I wanted to give myself a chance to live.
Since I don't post anything to social media anymore, I didn't have anyone to bear witness, and I like that just fine.
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Because I do it all baby. I can't box myself into a dating profile, but professionals and personals are supposed to know everything they know about me through my Instagram as you may?
No. To really understand why I'm about to commit seppuku is not because you're a fucking moron. Throwing yourself on someone else's sword. And inviting yourself to someone else's war on purpose than getting mad because you didn't research your tour guides enough and they let you astray. #thats ultra maga lame tbh #so sorry #hard knock life 🎻🎻🎻
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You have access to my auto updating resume, and you might want me on your team because I'm a hard fucking worker. But you're too scared to even look because you know I'm going to come for your job as well too.
But you don't know that I never would because I'd be pushing you to succeed even more than me so I could succeed in my own ways. # we are not the same # thank glob # mutations rule # X-Men #freaksgive #beats
I'm already going to put competition, not collaboration, and I'm the fucking Capricorn on my merch so don't even think about it. I have receipts. And Tumblr always has my back.
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And I finally know why they scream witness me before they throw themselves into oblivion. Because at that moment, they're falling into oblivion thinking they're doing what that gross dude at the top of the mountain was doing in Furry Road #funtypo #feelscute #maydelete #later but #enjoying #reading it #now #sothatcanbeenough #for me and #me only
Because he had the biggest balls and access to all the water and raped every single woman and child he made and came across. Doesn't seem like the guy I want to look up to. Even though he's put himself on the highest peak. Like I said, it's all about #perspective. Sorry I figured out the ultimate cheat code to my life and you haven't yet, but it took me a while. And I'm willing to help. Because I'm great at tech and video games and cheat codes and perma death, and whatever you're going to need in the situation because I'm also a gamer.
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I'm better than you now but I've seen you succeed and outrun me every single time. And instead of getting upset, I finally get off the couch and run after you because it's fun to see if I can actually get you. Because friendly competition can exist. Because I can insult you and love you at the same time. Because you can't put me in a Venn diagram even if that's all you see your life as. Because I used to, and I used to force my thoughts into boxes. But now I'm following my thoughts and letting me take them where they lead.
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comedywalkwalk · 1 year
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youtube
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Hello and welcome back to day two of Comedy Walk! Walk! I wasnt able to find a postable clip of the episode I listened to today, so I posted a clip of Aziz Ansari (one of todays featured guests) from the Comedy Bang! Bang! Tv show; but if you’re really interested in hearing it, check out cbbworld.com
Another walk, another episode of Comedy Death Ray radio on indie 103.1. Todays guests were Aziz Ansari (Parks & Rec) and Kevin Nealon (SNL) as well as Doug Benson who makes his second appearance for another segment of “Doug Loves Movies”
This episode started with their more commonly known theme song performed by Reggie Watts, however I believe at this point in the series the song hadn’t yet been written, so after Scott read his intro, he played a song by Greg Beherents band, The Reigning Monarchs (which I will list below) the show still heavily features music like a regular radio show, however it seems as if the songs have all been cut or edited down now that the episodes have been rereleased as part of the Comedy Bang! Bang! series. They also mentioned that the show was being video taped and broadcast on G4 (but I couldn’t find any clips)
Todays episode was much shorter than yesterdays, Aziz was the cohost and Kevin was there promoting Aliens in the Attic, as well as a book he just wrote called “Yeah you’re pregnant, but what about me?” They also took a live caller who just wanted to know what the lineup was for that weeks Comedy Death Ray live show. After the call they read a few twitter questions like “Do you smoke weed?” And “How can I protect my home from the incoming zombie pig apocalypse?” Neither of which gained much traction as conversation starters. At the end of the show they get a call from Doug Benson who gives them his review of the new Star Trek movie, which he says was enjoyable even though he only stayed for the first 40 minutes before leaving. His three word review of the film was “Tyler Fucking Perry!” To finish things off Scott says Happy Birthday to Kulap his Comedy Death Ray partner BJ Porter.
As far as the walk goes, I did notice I was walking much quicker than I did yesterday, it didn’t take me as long to get to the park as it did the day before. I remembered to count my laps today, I did 4 laps around the park before heading back home on the opposite side of the neighborhood. The weather was fantastic, I didn’t even wear a sweatshirt. The park was packed with people though, not enough to deter me but uncomfortable nonetheless. I also noticed that part of the circle in the park is on an incline so I guess that’s like a bonus?
My stats weren’t as impressive today as they were yesterday, but I’m not looking to top any scores or anything, so that’s ok. The walk ended up being shorter just because todays episode was shorter in length. I ended up doing 4947 steps and 2.14 miles in just under an hour.
Overall the walk was easier, but the episode wasn’t as fun as I was hoping. Either way I enjoyed both. Episode 2/walk 2 gets a 3 out of 5.
Todays songs:
The Reigning Monarchs - “Short pants for Fatty”
The Lonely Island - “Sax Man”
Flight of the Conchords - “Business Time”
Weird Al - “Eat It”
Joe Pesci - “Wise Guy”
Hard & Phirm - “Pi”
Dragon Boy Suede - “Nut Valet”
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rankertopgoogle · 1 year
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New motivational Posts
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New Motivation Videos
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 New Motivational Posts
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the28thofseptemberr · 3 years
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so, my favorite "larry moments" are moments when something bad/unusual happens, and harry's immediate instinct is to turn to louis. these are really teeny tiny moments but i think they're really cute!
the elevator moment is my favorite out of my favorites (lol). here we have harry being an adorable frog and waving goodbye to fans as the elevator doors are closing, but the doors suddenly stop and harry immediately seeks out louis (x):
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and here's a picture (that took me a whole hour to find agh) that proves louis was in the general direction harry turned to (x):
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there's also the boba tea moment, when harry tried boba tea and evidently didn't like it very much, so he tried to give it to louis (and louis was about to take it too, but he probably stopped because he realized they were on camera :/) (x):
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and then there's this moment that sort of, maybe counts? it's a really small moment in the "live while we're young" bts, where it looks like something's going on with harry's ankle and he's showing it to louis (x):
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anyway, those are the moments i can think of that fall under the category of harry going "must find louis!! must show louis!!" whenever something's wrong. i love these moments because it sort of shows that harry's automatic instinct is just louis, and it gives me big husband behavior vibes as well!!
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wrenqueenisboss · 3 years
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DSMP x gn!reader heacanons (reader with bad sleep schedule)
Them reacting to you having a really shitty sleep schedule. Warnings: cursing (mild), mentions of wounds, showed cuts, cleaning on injuries (tell me if I forget anything, please)
Dream:
(you and dream live together in Florida (without Sapnap))
Dream had been in a call with Sapnap and George for hours and it was 2 am at this point
he had been screaming/shouting and laughing so consistently you had developed a headache (another reason it was difficult to sleep)
he had recently broken another speedrun world record so he was celebrating with his besties 
you hadn’t gone to bed yet because you knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep without your boyfriend there
(both you and Dream really like cuddles. neither of you can sleep well without the other)
so you stayed on the couch, scrolling through twitter on your phone as you laid down
Finally, you heard Dream end his call, saying goodbye to his friends. His door creaked the slightest bit as he opened and closed it
Dream was so shocked to find you sitting on the couch at this hour. he was concerned too
“Babe? You’re still awake?”
you chuckled. “obviously”
he walked over to you and cuddled into your side. “You should be asleep. It’s late.” his voice was slightly muffled because of how he had his head nuzzled into your neck
“I couldn’t sleep without you there,” you mumbled, running your hand through his soft blond hair
Dream suddenly felt guilty “staying up this late really isn’t good for you. But if it helps you get to sleep, I’ll go to sleep earlier too”
you hummed happily before falling asleep cuddling your boyfriend
you were so tired you didn’t realize Dream had picked you up bridal style and taken you to your guys’ bed
Sapnap:
(you guys are in different houses for this) (he’s streaming and is also on a discord call with Karl and Quackity)
he was streaming at 2:30 in the morning when he got a random text from you “hi :) ,” it said
He rolled his eyes affectionately before responding “it’s late, idiot” “go to bed”
you sent back “I can’t” 
Sapnap looked back over at his stream. The chat was spamming questions on who he could be texting that would make him smile like that
finally, Karl from the discord call noticed how quiet Sapnap was being
“Sap? is everything okay?”
Sapnap looked up. “Oh yeah. I’m fine. I was just texting someone.”
“Who?” Quackity asked?
Sapnap made sure to mute on stream. “My partner.”
Karl and Quackity were shocked.
don’t worry, you and Sapnap had discussed that you were okay with his friends knowing about your relationship, but you wanted to keep it off stream and private
“You never told us you had a partner!” Karl said, happily.
“Well, I do. And they desperately want my attention, so I think I’m gonna end stream.”
“nooooo!” Karl and Quackity said dramatically in unison. “Your partner is evil, taking you away from us!”
Sapnap laughed then unmuted, giving an excuse before he ended stream to FaceTime you
George:
(you live in Brighton with George) (the internet knows you guys are dating. They ship you so much)
George was in a discord call (without camera on) at a pretty reasonable time, but you were exhausted
you hadn’t gotten more than four hours of sleep in the past three days
Wanting to be near George you just walked into his room
he whipped his head around, surprised by the sudden noise of you opening his door
he took one look at your tired face and asked “are you okay?”
You laughed. “No, not at all. My sleep schedule is shitty and I feel like shit. I haven’t gotten proper sleep in three days”
George winced.
Sapnap and Dream screamed hellos into George’s headphones which made him take them off with a grimace
He unplugged his headphones and you heard your boyfriend’s friends’ greetings
you unenthusiastically waved before speaking in a tired voice “I’m taking your best friend. He’s needed for Cuddle Duty”
George smiled and shook his head playfully as his friends shouted in protest
“no!” dream shouted. “He’s-” he wheezed like a broken tea kettle “he’s my boyfriend” (George rolled his eyes at that)
Sapnap yelled, “don’t take him!!!! you’re a best friend stealer, Y/n! Shame on you!”
You frowned with mock malice. “Well, suck it up. ‘Cause I’m taking him.”
George actually laughed at that. “I guess that’s it. Bye, guys! I’m gonna help Y/n finally get some good sleep.”
Wilbur:
Wilbur was doing a YLYL stream when he needed to go get a glass of water
keep in mind, it was sorta late. Like, midnight.
so he walked into his kitchen only to find you snacking on some popcorn (potato chips for my friends with braces ;] )
he looks at you with fond sadness “my love, why aren’t you asleep?”
you look up at him with a sheepish smile “Will, you know I have a very shitty sleep schedule. I’m not gonna sleep tonight, I don’t think.”
Wilbur frowned. “I think not!” he said, moving to hug you from behind
he rested his head on your shoulder, breathing in your scent
“we’re gonna go to bed,” he mumbles. “It’s late”
“Uh... not really,” you said. “midnight isn’t that late. And plus, you’re streaming.”
Wilbur frowned again, remembering his stream 
“Oh yeah, my stream. That’s fine, I’ll just end it early. Laugh at a couple videos to make the perfect excuse.”
“That’s actually... a good idea.”
“Why do you sound so surprised, Y/n?”
You just chuckled and gently pushed yourself off from the counter, prompting Wilbur to let go of you and step back
You walked to your shared bedroom to get in bed
As you tucked yourself into bed, you finally realized just how tired you were. Your eyelids began to close as you were lulled into sleep by the sounds of your boyfriend’s laughter next door.
c!Technoblade:
he was just coming back from a patrol (protecting your guys’ home) pretty late at night when he saw you brewing potions at your desk
because it was so late, you had several lanterns lit around your workspace so you could read the tomes and instructions that you needed
Tech honestly didn’t expect you to be up this late
The voices (who love you) immediately erupt with concern
‘are they okay?’ ‘why aren’t they asleep?’ ‘are they hurt?’ ‘if someone hurt them... blood for the blood god’ ‘they look so tired’
Techno dropped his weapons in one of his chests then began to undo his armor
Noticing his presence, you dropped what you were doing and hastily walked over to him
“Let me help you,” you murmured as your fingers undid the buckles and clasps of his armor one by one
He thanked you when the armor was stored away as well, taking some more time to examine you
your sleep-lidded eyes had dark circles under them. Your movements weren’t as precise as normal, and to put it plain and simple, you looked exhausted.
“My love,” techno prompted, gently tilting your head up to get a better look at your eyes and face. “is everything alright?”
you huffed. “not really. I can’t sleep anymore and it’s really getting to me. It’s making me so clumsy.”
Technoblade’s shook as he chuckled. “I could tell. I’m surprised you didn’t knock into table on your way over to me.” It was true. On your way over to help him with his armor, you nearly ran your knee right into the heavy coffee table in the living room
You rolled your eyes and pointed at your work table. The desk that was usually so neat and organized now looked like a mini tornado had ransacked it
“The exhaustion has me so clumsy I broke a glass. I made a mess trying to clean it up, too.” 
You raise up your arms to show him the cuts on your hands and arms. There was some dried blood on your arms as well.
The Voices in Techno’s head once again exploded with comments of concern. He takes your hands in his, gently brushing his callused fingers over your wounds.
“I’ll help you clean these up and then we’ll get to bed, okay?” He pressed a gentle kiss to your lips 
“okay”
and you do just that
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salemwritesxx · 3 years
Text
𝓽𝓱𝓻𝓮𝓮 𝔂𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓼.
𝔹 𝕒 𝕜 𝕦 𝕘 𝕠 𝕦  𝕂 𝕒 𝕥 𝕤 𝕦 𝕜 𝕚
     ⇴ male reader [24, pro-hero, alpha, quirk: ice-phoenix]      ⇴ all characters are depicted as [18]+
↳ summary: Bakugou and [Your.name] were dating, about to get married. Though one morning, everything that was dear to [Your.name] was brutally ripped away when he found a letter from his fiancé. Katsuki was gone, no traces left behind. And now, after three years [Your.name] was suddenly confronted with the reason when he meets his ex-fiancé again in a small town in Hokkaido.
↣ rating: mature ↣ warnings: abo universe, male pregnancy, bonding (biting for the bond mark to appear), drama / angst that turns into a happy end though; angst ending version read here.
AN: This was inspired by @amgjiks ’ request they sent in a few months ago! posting this story under your original request feels kinda “wrong” since I’d be ignoring half of what you requested basically so imma keep the original for when inspiration kicks in, in the future :)
part 2.
。☆✼★━━━━━━━━━━━━★✼☆。
Walking along the streets, you didn’t have a destination in mind. Just walking around and letting fresh air clear your fogged up brain. You had been overthinking – again. It was one of those days were you couldn’t help but think back to three years ago. Tomorrow three years ago would have been the date were you and Katsuki would have said “Yes”, but alas… it all came differently.
Running your hand through your hair, you sighed deeply.
“I need to stop thinking about this. It’s been so long! Like this, I will never be able to forget him.”
But how were you supposed to forget the love of your life? Especially when it all came so quickly and out of nowhere? One day everything was fine, the next, he was gone. And as much as you tried to find him, despite him stating in the letter you shouldn’t try, it was all in vain anyways. It’s as if Bakugou Katsuki had never existed. Even his parents, that were always very much in love with you as their son-in-law, completely ignored you and cut you off.
It was such a deep cut, even time wasn’t able to heal anything. The last three years were rough. Sleepless nights were a normal thing by now. And while media praised you for working so hard on your hero career, you just pushed yourself like that so you wouldn’t need to think about the past. Because when you were working, it all just faded away.
However, after collapsing one day, the agency forced you to take time off and so you landed in Hokkaido. Far away from the bustling streets of Tokyo, your gloomy small apartment and your work place. With nothing to do, you found yourself overthinking day and night. If you just could ask him one question.
Why?
-
Putting on his scent-blocking collar, Bakugou suddenly felt a little tugging on his t-shirt, hence he looked down. [Eye.color], big eyes stared at him and the toothy smile immediately had him smiling as well.
“Are you ready to go outside, Hiroto?”, he asked his son who looked so much like you, reminding him every day what he had done.
“MH! Can I bring Popo?”, Hiroto’s big eyes sparkled a little, making it very difficult for Katsuki to say no, hence he nodded a little.
Watching his son, it only took a few moments before he came back with his stuffed animal, it was a phoenix. Rather, it was your merchandise. It… was complicated.
“Ready to go?”
“Yeess!”
And so, Katsuki locked the door behind him, leaving to go for a walk around the block and a quick park visit.
-
Leaning against a bridge, you stared down, still pondering. If you had just acted differently, maybe you could have saved your relationship. Whatever it was you had done, it pushed him away from you and it was eating you inside to not know what the reason was.
You didn’t know how many hours you had been wandering around town, trying to stop thinking, but as always, you only thought harder the less you had to do. Hence why you decided to go back to the inn you were staying at.
After hours outside, Hiroto was tired, his plushy Popo hugged tightly against his chest as he silently walked besides Bakugou along the streets. One more time, Katsuki tried to pick his son up, “Hiro? Want me to carry you home? Aren’t you tired?”
“NHN!”, he shook his head, “Daddy is never tired when he fights the bad guys! So I am also not tired.”
Hiroto was stubborn as he kept walking besides Bakugou who was just sighing a little. It was his own fault, but he couldn’t lie to his son. Without even thinking about it, Katsuki talked about you whenever you were on TV. He didn’t know why he just couldn’t keep quiet about you being Hiroto’s father. So now, whenever you were on TV, Bakugou had to lie and say you were in another country fighting the bad guys, even though you were still in Tokyo, mere 4 hours away with the train. But Katsuki couldn’t come back. Not after he had hurt you so much. It was his decision to raise Hiroto alone. You deserved to be successful, it had been your dream. Kids just weren’t a thing you had planned for, at least not with 21.
Being caught up in his own thoughts, Bakugou didn’t see you on the other side of the street. Neither did you see him. Both of you staring ahead, thinking back to three years ago, what had been and what it could have become. However, something connected you both. You never had a chance to bond with him, was it a tradition in your alpha family to bond during the wedding night, but your connection was different. Said connection was looking up and across the street.
Hiroto just looked around tiredly when he saw someone. Someone he had seen on TV multiple times. The little boy didn’t know how many times he had wanted Katsuki to show him YouTube videos of you fighting.
“HAAAHHH!? DADDY!?”, a piercing cry came from the little one, shaking you and Katsuki awake. The latter immediately grabbing Hiroto, but.. it was too late.
“HIRO?!”, he yelled, though his son ran across the streets.
You, on the other hand, were so incredibly confused. There he was, standing literally on the other side and then there was a little child, running towards you and calling for you. Was this the “Why?” you had searched for, for so long? You couldn’t think about it when your legs moved on their own to get the kid out of a potential dangerous situation.
It was a blessing that the small town didn’t have much traffic, hence why you could easily run towards him, scoop him up and get back to the safe sidewalks in mere seconds. You didn’t want to imagine what could have happened in a busy city like Tokyo.
Then you stood there, awkwardly holding Hiroto who was crying and sobbing into your t-shirt while Katsuki’s own emotions were all over the place. The Omega had never imagined the possible chance of meeting you again. After three years, all he had built up from scratch to have a comfortable life far, far away from you, as to not disturb your career, it all broke apart.
However, Bakugou wasn’t the only one hearing something shattering, your own heart dropped into your stomach. The already broken pieces shattering more when you saw the pure horror displayed on his face. This was not how you imagined meeting him again. He hated you. You were certain of that. Whatever you had done to him, he never wanted to see you again. It all was so clear to you now it almost brought you to tears then and there.
Your inner Alpha was strongly urging you to just grab him, Katsuki was your Omega, even if you never had a chance to mark him, that’s just how it was. He was yours. But…
Slowly pushing your son away you put him into Bakugou’s arms. There were no words said, the only thing disturbing the silence was Hiroto’s sobbing. Especially when you loosened his tight grip on your t-shirt, he started squirming and screaming, trying to grab onto you more. He had seen you on TV so many times and now you were right in front of him. Yet, Hiroto had to watch when you turned around and left him behind.
You had so many questions rushing through your head, but at the same time, you couldn’t bring yourself to utter them out loud. Not after seeing Bakugou’s expression. This was never supposed to happen. Even if your heart yearned for answers, especially regarding his son… your son?
Without thinking about it, Katsuki put Hiroto down to let him run after you once again. It was such an impulse thing to do, he truly didn’t know why he had done it. Though after three years, why should he hide anymore when you had seen everything now? Also… after so long, he might have not been able to ignore his heart’s desire and yearning any longer.
It was so incredibly hard to ignore Hiroto’s crying and just walk away as if it had never happened, but for the sake of Katsuki’s happiness, you chose to go. However, a sudden tug made you stop. Looking down you saw ice around your ankles. It was weak and thin, easily breakable really. Hiroto’s? When you turned around, he had already clutched your leg tightly. Why?
When you looked back up, Bakugou also stood in front of you, his ruby eyes shimmering a little.
“Do you … want to talk?”, he finally asked, his voice breaking at the end though as he tried his hardest not to cry. What was he doing? It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen you in like three weeks, it had been YEARS since he left without any other word. Why would you even want to have anything to do with him or Hiroto?
“Yes!”, you said and it truly caught the Omega off-guard. After everything he put you through… If he was in your position he probably would have been so angry and furious, but you just seemed exhausted and tired.
But finally, you would be getting some answers.
--
All night long, you couldn’t sleep. After you had calmed down Hiroto enough, Bakugou gave you a little piece of paper with his address on it. “I work until 7. So we can talk without any disturbance.”, he said when he gave you the information. It was probably for the best. You didn’t want to imagine what would happen when your feelings would overcome you out in a café. [Your.hero.name] seen screaming in Hokkaido – you could see the news all over the internet already. So, it was probably for the best to meet him at home.
But that didn’t mean you weren’t nervous. How had your ex-fiancé been living his life the past three years? It was all exciting and scary at the same time to find out those things.
When you knocked on his door, your inner Alpha was impatiently pacing up and down. It was as nervous as you. But when the door opened and Katsuki stood there, you were sure for the first time in the last 12 hours, that it wasn’t a dream. Walking inside was heaven and hell at the same time. Everything smelled like him. The Omega’s scent was so familiar, but another one was mixed in – probably Hiroto’s.
“A friend of mine is looking after Hiroto tonight so he won’t be dragged into this.”, he said, nervously fumbling with his scent-blocking collar.
It was weird wearing it at home, but for you and himself, he had to wear it. His Omega had been going in circles ever since he met you again yesterday. It wanted to be taken and to be honest, Bakugou was also close to surrender to you. But it wasn’t that easy. You probably had so many questions.
“Oh… Yeah that’s for the best. Katsuki.”, you suddenly stopped in the middle of the hallways.
“Hm?”
“I’m sorry I can't wait, but you need to tell me now. Hiroto, he… called me Daddy and he has an ice quirk… so I am not wrong to assume that he is… our son?”
Katsuki could vividly feel your emotions, the Omega was shuddering, his throat dry and hands sweatier than usual.
“Yeah…”, was all he could choke out.
“Oh.. my God.”, you just mumbled to yourself. Hearing it out loud was like another punch in your stomach.
“Did you… leave me when you were pregnant?”, was your next question, still standing in the middle of the hallway.
However, Katsuki couldn’t even blame you. There were so many questions left unanswered.
“We were too young…”, his ruby eyes were shimmering again with tears, but he tried his best to keep them at bay.
“Too young?”, you were speechless for a moment, before looking back, “Why didn’t you tell me?! Why did you just… leave? Why… did you do everything yourself?!”
Now you were finally angry. After so long, you just couldn’t understand why he would leave you without saying anything. It could have all come differently if Katsuki would have just been honest!
“You had your career?! A baby didn’t just… fucking fit into our lifestyle! What else could I have done?!”, Bakugou yelled back. He knew it would come to this.
“SO?! You also had your career, we were both working hard to become well-known heroes so that’s not a fucking excuse. What else?? You seriously ask me?!”, you gestured wildly.
“You wouldn’t have wanted to raise a child, it was too soon!”
“It was NOT your right to decide that for me!”, you yelled, your voice breaking as tears welled up.
Bakugou once again being a little taken aback. His heart was racing and his tears so close to falling.
“You could have asked me, we could have worked it out.”, the first tears successfully fought their way out as they rolled over your cheeks.
“I loved you SO MUCH. If it was possible I would have literally brought you the stars from the sky. I would have done anything. And you? You just leave. Without anything but a letter telling me you cannot marry me. Do you have the slightest idea how I felt?”, your voice was shaking and breaking here and there, but it was freeing to finally let it all out.
“I thought it was for the best. I didn’t know what to do.“, Bakugou’s voice was so uncharacteristically weak and small.
“You didn’t know?? Did you never trust me, Katsuki? Was I just- such a horrible Alpha to you? Did you think I’d force you to an abortion? Was I not good enough to be a father?!”, you asked trying so hard not to scream, but all these pent up feelings, it all just gushed out without any sort of valve to stop yourself.
“That’s not it! I knew you wouldn’t do that, I just-“
“WHAT? Please tell me why! Why?! Why was I not worthy to be your mate? Why did you refuse to tell me and just leave?! Why did you chose raising OUR baby alone, I-“
“I DON’T KNOW, OKAY?! I don’t know! It was a fucking stupid decision out of nowhere!”, he finally screamed back, tears cascading down his face.
“Don’t you think I have regretted it? Do you think I LIKE being a single parent?! I know I fucked up. I know I threw it all away because I panicked, okay?! I just panicked and before I knew it I was on the train.”, Katsuki sobbed, desperately wiping away his tears.
“We were so fucking young! We had planned to marry, we were talking about saving up for the future to build a house, to have a family in like 10 years or more. But… But I just messed up! I forgot to take my medication before going into Heat, it was my fault I got pregnant- I… I couldn’t bring myself to tell you. Throw everything we planned out the window because I was too fucking stupid to remember.”, his voice broke horribly, being squeaky from time to time as Bakugou’s guilt just overflowed.
The Omega was shaking and instinctively, you and your inner Alpha wanted to protect him. Hence why you wiped away your tears and took a deep breath to calm yourself.
“I know I messed up. Fuck.”, he cried and yet laughed at himself. Hands buried in his hair, Bakugou just wanted to cease to exist in that moment. He had done so many things wrong in his life. The only good thing that had ever happened was meeting you and falling in love with you and even that he destroyed.
He was gasping for air due to talking nonstop while gesturing with his hands wildly. And then, you just hugged him. Your Alpha scent surrounding him and soothing him. Your arms strong and warm, just perfect to melt into them and let everything loose. Oh, how he had missed that.
“I just… wish you had given me a choice. I wish you would have trusted me more. I would have done anything for you and our baby. It would have been hard, I know, but I am sure we would have been able to make it work.”, you quietly said while soothingly caressing his back and letting a quiet, calming purr erupt from your throat. A sign how close you truly were as you would never purr for anyone else than Bakugou.
“I’m sorry.”, Bakugou sobbed and clawed at your clothes, “I love you and I missed you and.. it was so hard alone, but I know I don’t have any fucking right to complain about it because it’s all my fault and I hurt you so much and-“
You hugged him a little tighter.
“I regret everything, I… I… can you forgive me? Can you give me a second chance? I know I don’t deserve it. I know…”
Had you ever seen him so weak before? No. And it truly tugged on your heart strings. There is nothing you wanted more. Get back together. Be happy again. But-
“Katsuki… have you ever thought of coming back to me? Like, if I had never shown up, if I had never found out… wouldn’t you keep on living without me just fine? Don’t you think this is your guilty conscious speaking? You don’t want me. You don’t need me.”
That was the last thing you said before you pulled back from him at last. Bakugou was quite speechless, just staring at you, red, swollen eyes and a tear-stained face made it hard to just go. But it was for the better. Even if he had regretted it, he was never pushed so far as to come back to you. Like that, maybe it was for the best.
Though before you could turn away, he grabbed your hand.
“Katsuki…”
“I wanted… during the pregnancy, after Hiroto was born and every time I saw you on TV, I was so close to leaving all of this. But at that point, I was too fucking scared. I had no right to go back… There are so many letters I’ve written and never sent. [Your.name], I… I literally have a suitcase ready to go. I’ve been waiting for some sort of sign or I don’t know and now? You’re here. Right here in front of me. I know it’s foolish and I’m stupid and have no fucking right to demand this from you, but please… Let me come back. Please forgive me. Please… be Hiroto’s father.”
He had never in his life begged. His superiority complex definitely wouldn’t allow for any of that, but right now was different. He realized the hurt he had caused. How wrong he was. Bakugou had regretted running away in the first week of living in Hokkaido. He always told himself it was “the right thing”. So maybe it was pathetic that he came crawling back, but if there was a slight chance you would take him back, he just had to take it.
You just sighed. Your heart was confused. While your heart screamed yes over and over again, your brain was telling you no. What if it was just a spur of the moment thing? What if he would leave you again when things would get tough?
But then, you looked down and onto his hand. The gold engagement ring you had gotten him around four years ago was still on his ring finger.
“You still… wear it?”, you asked as you reached for the hand that gripped your wrist tightly. His hands were shaking still – you have never seen him like that.
“It’s the only thing that kept me connected to you…”
“Katsuki…”
Reaching out, you cupped his face with your big hand, the Omega instinctively leaning against it. It was okay. Even if you were to get hurt again. Even if you forgave too quickly. Everything was okay now as you leaned in to connect your lips.
Holding onto you immediately, Bakugou’s fingers clawed at your t-shirt not wanting to let go ever again. Your lips melting together, emotions overwhelming you both as you pressed him into the wall. One hand reaching up to his collar. It took mere seconds for it to snap open. Then it fell to the floor, unleashing all of Bakugou’s Omega scent.
It being overwhelming was quite the understatement. Your knees were weak and legs shaking. You couldn’t resist the urge to bury your face in the crook of his neck.
“Oh my God…”, you moaned as you slowly slid down onto the ground with him, Katsuki just whimpering as he hugged your body as close as possible.
He would never let go again – never!
-
With your teeth gracing along his neck, your sweaty bodies collided over and over again. Bakugou only able to sob as he held on to your hands tightly, nails digging into your skin and almost drawing blood.
You were hovering above him, hearing his cries and sobs. The sweet scent from his neck being so irresistible. You just wanted to bite. Mark him. It had been a tradition in your household to do so on your wedding night, but…
“Do it…”, you suddenly heard.
Bakugou could barely choke it out, ruby eyes filled with tears of pleasure as he whispered one more time, “Do it… It’s overdue…”
And then, without thinking twice about it anymore, you grabbed him tightly while your teeth sank into his skin.
A marvelous burning pain rushing through his body almost made Katsuki pass out. The sweet torture of being bonded to his mate was almost too much. That was all he had longed for, for so long. He didn’t know why you would take such a coward like him back, but he was so grateful and plain… happy.
--
Once you opened your eyes the next morning, it all felt like a dream. Especially when you reached to your side and it was empty.
Sitting up abruptly, you looked around – definitely not your room. So what happened last night was not a dream. However…
Without putting anything on, your heart was beating so fast when you rushed outside the bedroom door. Flashbacks to three years ago were haunting your mind.
“Katsuki?”, you tore open the next door, prepared to just see another letter on one of the tables.
Though it, thankfully, wasn’t the case. There he was, standing in the kitchen, your flannel from yesterday the only thing covering his body while he was talking to someone on the phone. Unintentionally, tears had formed in your eyes, but now, you just sighed shakily and wiped over your eyes quickly.
Bakugou, who had turned around once he heard you calling for him, certainly had his heart sinking in the pit of his stomach.
That was his fault.
“Okay… okay, thank you.”, then he ended the call and turned to you, “Sorry, it was about Hiro. Akitoshi will bring him over before lunch.”
“Ah? Mh, okay.”
“Hey…”, putting his phone onto the table, he walked towards you. The Omega’s strong arms wrapped around your waist as he cuddled against your chest.
“I am not running away again. I promise.”, Katsuki barely whispered.
Hugging him tightly with your hand buried in his hair, you just quietly sighed and then kissed his forehead before leaning your head against his.
“I know. I just need some time.”, you also said quietly and Bakugou understood.
Hence why he reached out to cup your face, smiling softly.
“I love you.”
A small smile also flitted across your lips. Your hands cupping his own as you leaned down to kiss him.
“I love you, too.”
Walking back into the bedroom, Bakugou soon lost the flannel again as he slipped into bed, snuggling against you; legs tangled and naked bodies melting together. Unintentionally your hand had slipped down to his belly. That’s when you felt uneven skin and a scar underneath your fingertips. Yesterday, you were caught up in all your pent up emotions too much, so you didn’t notice.
It was his C-Section scar.
“Katsuki?”
“Hm?”
“Tell me about Hiroto.”
Subconsciously, his lips curved into a smile. That you wanted to know more about your son melted his heart but also made him feel more guilty. If only he could turn back time.
“Yeah.”, and then, he started talking and you just listened to the soothing voice of your Omega.
There were three years to catch up on, but due to Katsuki telling your son about you all the time, at least it was easier for Hiroto. With how he was clinging to you yesterday, it was obvious he loved you even though he had never met you in person. And you wanted to be there for him at last. You had only met him yesterday for a brief moment but your heart was already filled with so much love that you wanted to give to him.
。☆✼★━━━━━━━━━━━━★✼☆。
@salemwritesxx || do not repost, edit, modify or translate my works
⇻ salem.talks: I’d love to know what y’all thought of this story? :) once again I took inspiration from the request and I am pretty happy with the outcome!
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Text
Savior
Chapter 2: Finding Strength
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(This is NOT my gif. Credit to the creator <3)
series summary: when your protector returns, he finds you broken and abused and helps you climb out of the darkness
chapter summary: you finally have had enough and you find the strength to escape
pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader
warning: mentions of death, acts.mentions of abuse, mentions of self harm
word count: 2.1k
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Quitting the job you love was really hard. After your brother died you got back together with Kade after a short break in the relationship, you moved in with him. You didn’t have the best relationship with your parents, and it only got worse when Danny, your brother, died while overseas.
You walked into the apartment, your head bowed trying to hide the tears threatened to spill down your cheeks. He’s already home, you saw his car in his usual spot in the parking garage when you pulled in. You could also make out the sound of the tv playing in the living room.
You headed towards the bedroom until he called your name, making you turn and slowly make your way into the living room.
“Did you do it?”
There are empty beer bottles everywhere along with a half empty bottle of whiskey sitting on the coffee table. You sighed but nodded nonetheless, playing with the hem of your blouse.
“Good. Start cleaning. This place is a mess.”
And you did what he said, all day. He made you scrub the floor down with a scrubbing brush. You had to clean every inch of the apartment, while picking up the trash he left behind him all day. When night came, you had officially cleaned everything and cooked him dinner. You sat down at the table, ready to eat after not having breakfast or lunch all day.
“What are you doing? You think you deserve to eat? No. You're going to sit there and think about what you did.”
With sad eyes and an ache in your stomach, you didn’t fuss. You didn’t even say a word. You didn’t want him to see you cry so you held it in as much as you could. You hold back sobs, it creates a burning feeling in your chest and throat.
After you got home yesterday, Kade had been enraged. Accused you of cheating, he didn’t even mention you telling Jay about the abuse. It was worse because it was Jay. He knew your background, and how you fell in love with him when you were younger. Last night's memories were fuzzy after that. All you can remember was the agonizing pain and the god awful headache you had after he slammed your head against the kitchen counter. Kade has made you quit your job, you weren’t sure why.
Kade wipes his mouth with a cloth once he’s finished eating. “I try to be nice to you. But you test me. Every single day, you test me.” He stands from his seat at the table, coming closer and closer to you. You look up at him pleading with your eyes.
“Worthless. Pathetic. Get up.”
You do as you're told and stand up. He roughly grabs your arms, dragging you down the hall. You think he’s heading towards the bedroom but he stops at the hallway bathroom. He opens it and tosses me inside.
“This is your new room now. You should get comfortable,” he snarls. You're on the ground now, groaning. He takes the chance and shoves his foot into your chest.
When will it stop! When is enough, enough for him? Why am I not good enough? What did I do that made him so violent?
These things run through your head as he continues his abuse. Pain and suffering, blood and tears are things you have gotten used to.
It’s an hour later when he stops, wiping the sweat from his forehead as he stares down at you in disgust. You look at him weakly and in pain. You're almost positive you need medical attention, but you say nothing.
“Cheating whore,” he spits. With one final look, he’s gone. The sound of the kick in the bathroom door clicking, only making more tears pool in your eyes.
What has my life come to? When did it get this bad? How did I let it get this bad?
The bathroom floor was ice cold, even with a towel laid underneath you, you were still freezing. You know he bumped the temperature down, torturing you even when he wasn’t at home. You twirled the card between your fingers. His name sticking out along with his number.
Deceive Hay Halstead.
You remember fourteen year old you, rushing into your brothers room where he and Jay were playing video games. You remember how excited you were when you told the both of them you got the lead role in your dance group.
“I’m so proud of you,” Jay had exclaimed.
You wondered if he would be proud of you now.
Would he?
There’s so much history between you and Jay, a lot of things your brother never knew about, and now he never will.
It’s been days since you saw him. You can still see his smile and his perfect white teeth as he spoke to you. You can still feel his body against yours from that day he had you against the wall.
You should’ve told him. You're filled with regret. He could’ve helped you get out.
I wouldn’t be in this stupid bathroom if I had agreed to let him help me.
You could’ve called him the day he made you quit your job. You could’ve driven off, anywhere. Somewhere, where Kade couldn’t find you.
Yet, here you are. You have a few - a lot - new bruises that have replaced the old ones. There’s still a harsh pain in your chest and your stomach from not having eaten in days. You know it’s been at least a week.
He comes and goes. Sometimes you can hear giggles pass down the hallway to your shared bedroom. Then…you can hear him pleasing other women in your bed. The ones he would love you on, on good days.
But no…he is with other women while the woman he should be with is withering away down the hall.
You didn’t scream, you should’ve. You know that now. You were scared he would kill you or those girls. You wouldn’t have been able to live with yourself if something happened to them because of you and your stupidity.
So you sucked it up.
It’s been two weeks. Yesterday had to be one of the worst days. You recall the rage burning like fire in his eyes. He was angry, more than usual. Something must’ve happened. Either way, there’s no excuse for what he did.
The cuts along your back sting like hell. You begged him to stop, and it was a mistake. You should’ve let him beat you till it was out of his system for the night. If it’s even possible, he got angrier. He threw you into the bathroom counter, your back crashing into the mirror, causing it to shatter agains you. Your thigh had hit the faucet, creating a huge bruise on the back of it, but nothing hurt worse than the pain in your heart.
“Pathetic slut,” he snapped before walking out, locking the door behind him.
You sit on the floor only a day later, staring at yourself through the glossy flooring. A large shard of glass sat next to you, your eyes wander to it ever so often. It tempts you. Taunts you like a clear voice in your head.
“Do it.” It would say.
Then you would hear the sound of his voice. Familiar, warm, and inviting. Your heart aches. You miss him.
You can see him at the elevator, waiting for it to open while he looks at you.
“You’re strong. Remember that.”
You wonder why you pushed him away. Why you don’t let yourself trust the one man, that still lives, that would never hurt you.
A sob racks through your body as you pick up the large piece of the mirror and throw it across the room. An aggravated scream leaves you as you stand up with trembling legs.
How could I let this happen? Why didn’t I ask for help? The abuse has gone on for three years.
Your throughts were only “why” and “what if’s.”
He’s taken everything from you. Ripped you from your friends, your old life. You didn’t even notice at the time. You just needed someone. You followed him blindly. He told you you only needed him. Nothing - no one else.
I lost myself trying to please him.
You decided you're done letting him win. You're done letting him control your life. Your choices were dying here in this bathroom helplessly, or die trying to get out. You chose the latter.
You searched around the room in a haste, looking for anything to break the doorknob off. Your eyes trained on the top of the toilet. You take it off, arms falling at the weight. You are weak from the two weeks with no food, but you still find it in yourself to raise it over your head and lm it down in the knob.
You weren’t sure the exact time, but Kade would be home soon. So you knew you had to hurry
One hit didn’t seem to do it, so you raise it again and with a grunt, you use all your strength to slam it back down again. Your mouth falls open in surprise when the knob falls to the floor with a loud clanking noise.
It took you a moment, but you dropped the lid and rushed out of the bathroom. You made your way to the home phone, picking it up with shaky hands.
You're hit with a wave of dizziness, but you still dial the number you now know by heart. You were filled with hope when he answered after a couple of rings.
“Halstead.”
“JJ?”
There was a silence on the other end of the phone for a second, but soon he repeats your name.
“I want out. P-Please help me,” you beg, tears streaming down your face as you pathetically spike.
“Address. I need an address.”
The sound of the front door unlocking catches your attention. Your body goes ridged, frozen in place.
Jay repeats your name a couple of times.
“No. No,” you mutter as you begin to back away.
“Hey! What’s going on? I need an address, sweetheart.”
You somehow manage to tell him the address with a, “please hurry,” at the end. You hang up, throwing the phone to the side. You're filled with dread as Kade stumbles into the room, pulling at his tie. You're starting to regret what you just did.
Kade narrows his eyes, ripping his tie from his neck.
“How the hell did you get out?”
He stalks towards you, and although your first instinct is to run, you stay put. You're done taking the abuse.
“I’m done, Kade. We’re done.” You stand your ground, head held high and a new found confidence in your words. He laughs. It’s evil and sickening.
“We’re done? I say when we’re done!” He exclaims, his hand rising and connecting with your face before you had the chance to move. You fall to the floor from the power of the slap. Although you act confident and strong, you're weak. Two weeks without food would be the cause. It didn’t help that you were still in pain from the most recent beating.
You let out a cry as he pulls your hair back with a huff. “When will you learn?” He asked, pulling your head back so you were facing him.
“You look pathetic,” he laughs. You're slapped in the face once more before being dragged towards the kitchen by your throat. You grabbed at him, your instincts kicking in.
“God, your stupid,” he spat, shoving you into the table. Your eyes widen as you feel your skirt, the same one you’ve worn for two weeks now, being pulled around your hips. You felt hopeless now. You only hoped Jay would be here soon.
“At least you're good for something.” You heard him mutter before the sound of his zipper being undone filled your ears. You clamped your legs together and attempted to move, but it was no use. He overpowered you easily. You cried softly as he moved closer and held you down with a deadly grip on your bruised and cut back.
There’s a knock on the door that paused Kade’s actions. He hissed and pulled away, fixing himself.
“Who the hell did you call? Did you call someone?”
The look of fury in his eyes was enough to have you cowering in fear. A scream rips from your throat as he grabs you by your hair again.
“CPD! Open up!” You heard his familiar voice. The same voice you heard as you laid on the bathroom floor.
Kade’s grip on you tightens. “I’m going to kill you, you little bitch.”
~
A/N: Small cliffhanger? Yep. Chapter 3 should be out Tusedsy! If you want added to the Saviors taglist let me know!
@miranada0102 @brookerz122493 @musicismyescape27 @kelelas-life
(Not sure why some of these didn’t work.)
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