#yet wanting that same opportunity to debut for other girls I liked is viewed as hating them *sigh*

[en-lista]

🖥 ... ⃕  THE CIRCUS UPLOADED A NEW VIDEO !

description : on the latest episode of mirror mirror, the studio is blessed by the goddess of hearts’ presence. oh, and she brought a enchanting friend too!

warning : mentions of low self-esteem, cyberbullying, and other things that may be triggering. viewer discretion is advised.

“hey, i’m enhypen and pandora’s calista. thank you for inviting me!” the female idol bows to the camera before taking her seat. 

her fictional counterpart walks into view and shyly waves at the camera.

“my name’s naeva, it’s nice to meet you all.” she speaks so softly, and with such a pretty smile on her face, you can hear the staff cooing.

we, the editors, decide to leave that sound in because #relate.

“we’re here to answer some questions that you, the audience, have sent in.” calista looks over at the lavender-haired girl and holds up her fist in a hwaiting motion. “shall we get started?” 

“mhm, let’s do it!”

THE GODDESS OF HEARTS : CALISTA !

👤 : what do you want to be remembered as in the future?

“i’d like to be remembered as someone who, despite having the odds stacked against her, pursued her dreams. life’s too short to play everything by the standards, do what you love without restraint.” 

calista looks proud of her own answer, until she hastily tacks on, “of course, within non-harmful boundaries!”

do what you love without restraint, but within non-harmful boundaries — roh aejeong, 2023

👤 : favorite concept you’ve done so far?

“since i haven’t properly debuted with pandora yet, i’ll pick my favorite from enha. honestly, i really enjoyed the concept we did for dimension-dilemma. compared to most of our eras, tamed-dashed had more of a carefree.. summery type of vibe, you know?” 

she pauses to look at naeva, who nods; the latter obviously invested in her words. 

“we didn’t have to worry much about acting seriously or pulling dangerous stunts because we were given the opportunity act like people our age.”

👤 : who had the most negative impact on your life?

“i wish i could answer but..” calista pretends to clear her throat before continuing, “well third place would be those who claim to be fans. it’s hard to just act like those criticisms and negativity don’t exist because they lurk everywhere, acting like they enjoy our music and watching our content when they actually find joy in tearing us, and others who come to our defense, down. 

so while i acknowledge that they’re here, waiting for me to slip up or even just breathe, i refuse to fall to their level. because at the end of the day, they’re just insecure people hiding behind screens to feel better about themselves.”

👤 : who’s your celebrity crush?

“at the moment?” 

the production crew gasp dramatically, eliciting both girls to laugh. it’s adorable, the way they try to cover their mouth but end up revealing their angelic smiles between peals of laughter.

“i just wanted to clarify- okay, i wouldn’t call it a crush, but i really admire zb1’s jiwoong. i’ve been following him from his acting debut to boys planet. he’s so cool and confident i just wanna ask him tips on how to do that too.. maybe i’ll ask gyunnie to put in a good word for me..”

to hourglass’s gyuri, please introduce calista to zb1′s jiwoong. love, the circus ♡  p.s. everyone here on this channel loves your group, never stop being queens! 

👤 : an idol you’d like to collaborate with?

“i’m stuck between seventeen and txt.. and no it’s not because i have friends in both groups.. okay maybe a little-”

calista pouts, causing the staff to fawn over her.

“seventeen are such exceptional performers that if i ever got to collab with them, i think i saved an empire in my previous life. at the same time though, txt are well-rounded idols with fantastic concepts to match so yeah-”

👤 : pandora or enha?

“or.”

calista’s smiling, yet it doesn’t quite reach the corners of her eyes. she fidgets with the ring sitting prettily on her index finger, the golden rose acting like her anchor. the memory’s still vivid—she scolded the guys after seeing the price tag they forgot to discard.

“i’ll never choose only one of them, not when they’re all amazing, talented, sweet people. and while i haven’t known my girls for as long as i’ve known my boys, the time that i’ve spent with them so far makes me certain that choosing to debut with them isn’t a regret.”

she sheds a shaky breath. one of the producers ask if she’d like to take a break. calista shakes her head. “thank you for your concern but i’m okay, don’t worry.”

nevertheless, a staff member walks onto the scene to give her some tissues and water. 

👤 : would you like to continue acting as a full-time career?

“if you asked me this three years ago, i’d have said yes. but when i get on that stage with my members, and i hear the cheers of our engenes and planetes, i feel like i’ve found my true calling. but i am still open to receiving acting gigs. who knows, maybe you’ll see me in the next season of all of us are dead..”

“wait, are you implying that you didn’t..” naeva hesitates for a second before making some motions—a sequence of gestures that hopefully won’t give away the story for those who haven’t watched the show yet.

the idol merely looks at the camera with a smirk.

👤 : what’s your favorite song to perform?

“in terms of enha, i love performing drunk-dazed. it’s got these hypnotic beats, along with a bold and energetic choreography to complement it. i can’t deny that at the end, i’m absolutely winded from all the jumping and spinning on the floor, but it really is fun to perform for engenes.”

“what about pandora?” naeva asks, then initially gets silence as an answer.

“it’s hard to pick because again, i haven’t debuted with them yet..” the idol drifts off again, head tilted while she looks up at the ceiling—seemingly expecting the answer to fall from up there. “i’d say, mainly because we’ve practiced this song several times, blue & night is my favorite.”

👤 : which country would you like to perform in?

“oh that’s easy, the u.k!” calista smiles fondly as she recalls, “while chobao and i were hanging out with chiara unnie, she told us a lot about the country, especially the cities she grew up in. thanks to that, i’d love to perform there and have a few days to explore the places.”

naeva raises her hand. “if it’s not too much to ask, who’s chobao?”

“it’s not, don’t worry—that’s lanfen! she might come off as mean and blunt but beneath that impression is a considerate and hilarious fluffy cat.”

“when you put it like that, she reminds me of jaan. maybe they could be friends..”

“maybe, but they could also butt heads due to their similarities.”

“at the same time though-”

this commercial break is brought to you by the guests who spent five minutes engaged in a debate about whether two tough softies can get along, and how long can they last. 

👤 : if you could go back to the past while knowing your future, would you change anything?

“as cliché as it sounds, i’m the type of person to believe that everything happens for a reason. decisions may not bear good things right away and that’s okay. while i have made some choices that make me go ‘i shouldn’t have done that’, i wouldn’t change any of them because i did get something precious out of those.. admittedly at times.. dumb decisions.”

the answer receives applause that resonates throughout the entire studio. calista’s bottom lip juts out as she jokes, “can i keep everyone here in my pocket? you all are so sweet to me and nana.”

“you’d need a very big pocket for that.” naeva giggles even more when the determined female looks past the cameramen and clasps her hands, “please nayoung unnie! pretty please!”

to be continued.. 

THE HEART’S REFLECTION : NAEVA !

👤 : who is your best friend?

“how do you define a ‘best friend’?” she wonders, looking over to calista for guidance. of course the older girl readily provides it, “it’s someone who, among your friends, you’re closest to.”

“then that’d be solon. he’s always there for me no matter what. when i need to talk to someone about something, he’s ready to listen. or if i’m confused about a certain subject, he’ll break it down so i can understand. he’s quite protective too—nowadays, i rarely ever go to the sea without him or jino accompanying me.”

“it sounds like he really cares about you.” calista approves before gesturing to the camera. “why don’t you leave a message for him, just in case he watches this.”

naeva shifts in her seat and beams warmly. “thank you nono, i really appreciate everything you do for me. i’ll always do the same for you so please don’t be afraid to approach me.”

👤 : what is your favorite subject at school?

“i have two, but one isn’t an official subject, is it okay to mention both of them?”

when one is so polite and soft-spoken, how can the crew say no? 

translation: of course it’s okay, anything and (almost) everything is okay when it’s for naeva the sweetheart.

“i really like creative writing. there’s something enjoyable in being able to unleash your imagination on a piece of paper, as well as stirring ideas around to see what can be made out of them. at the same time though, i enjoy after school because nightball practice occurs at that time, and it’s pretty much one of the few occasions i get to see my friends together so that time is really important to me.”

👤 : does it feel like you don't fit in sometimes?

similar to her human counterpart, the hybrid hesitantly nods and strains her rosy lips to show a smile. “yes there is. it’s not easy being a supernatural creature, let alone being the offspring of a common and rare species. maybe that’s why i don’t have much friends outside of the brothers and sooha—everyone else is scared that i may use my allure on them.”

naeva falls silent shortly after that, her head hung low as she stares at her lap. it only lasts for at least 30 seconds before she hastily fixes her posture and rubs her palms against her skirt.

“i don’t mind it that much, my little group is more than enough for me. they may have different personalities, and sometimes they hang my sanity over the edge of no return, but none of them have ever made me feel like i don’t deserve to be in decelis; like i don’t deserve to have them as my friends. they trust me, and that’s what makes me happy.”

👤 : are you and sooha friends?

“yes we are!” the excited lilt in her voice makes everyone’s hearts flutter; some even acting like they got struck by cupid’s arrow. she doesn’t notice as she’s busy rolling up her sleeve to reveal the beaded bracelet sitting snug on her wrist. “unless my memory’s foggy, we made each other matching bracelet during our first girls’ night. granted, we live in the same dorm building, but we hadn’t really been able to hang out one on one until then.”

out of the blue, a sheepish aura begins to surround the student. “don’t get us wrong, we love our other friends but..”

“..but it’s nice to have a girl friend to spend time with, discuss and do things you can’t do with guys?” calista guesses, though the twinkle in her syrup-tinted irises says she’s far too familiar with naeva’s struggle.

“exactly! she also doesn’t use me as an armrest or suddenly leap on me to get a piggyback ride so my head and back manage to get a well-deserved break.”

what an.. interesting taste in furniture and transportation..?

👤 : what is your biggest secret?

“if i tell you then it won’t be a secret anymore, right?” she jests, the apples of her cheeks lightly heating up when her joke is met with laughter and agreement. “i’ll tell you a wish of mine.

when i was younger, i met this boy, and he became my friend for a day. i don’t recall much about him—just that his eyes were so pretty, i felt like i was staring into the sun, and he had a tendency to give more than he should.”

her fingers instinctively rose to her necklace; specifically, the silver pendant that hung on the middle. with nostalgia injected in her smile, she summarizes, “if i ever meet him again, i’d like to thank him for showing me that even if the world turns its back on me, there will always be someone waiting for me with open arms.”

👤 : are you a day or night person?

“oh, i’ll have to think thoroughly about that one.”

how to think thoroughly and look cute while doing it, according to naeva:

first, play with your sleeve while you ponder about it. next, begin to mentally compare the pair of times. finally, snap your fingers as you come to a satisfying conclusion.

“i’ll say night because that’s when my mind’s will to be productive is at its peak. i mean, i do manage to complete tasks during the day, but it tends to feel like i’m fighting tiredness while doing so. meanwhile, when the moon is hanging above me, i have so much energy that i genuinely enjoy the things i do like watch the nightball practice, practice writing a novel, play around by the sea—those kinds of activities.”

at the end of her explanation, she notices the look of awe some of the crew are giving her. while she attempts to ignore the urge to curl into herself, she meekly asks, “did i say something wrong?”

“have you ever considered becoming a rapper?” someone pipes up.

..hiding her face behind her hands shall suffice for now.

👤 : have you ever wished that, even if it was temporary, you could be normal?

“yeah, definitely, but that’s in the past. i’ve stopped caring about people’s impossible ideals, and now i’m content with who i am.”

it’s not hard to tell—not when she speaks confidently and exudes it. of course, calista sounds like she supports the ‘younger’ girl.

“i like that you mentioned embracing yourself, regardless of whether you fit others’ definition of ‘normal’ or not. at the end of the day, the only opinion that matters is your own, so be kind to yourself. never be afraid to be your own monarch.”

be your own monarch — naeva & calista, 2023

👤 : do you have a crush?

naeva purses her lips and looks at everything but the cameras. the mannerism doesn’t fall short on calista’s radar, and her lips curl into a cheshire smile.

“who is it~?” she playfully prods efore leaning closer to the blushing girl. “you can whisper it to me if you’d like.”

lavender tresses momentarily create a halo around naeva before they fall against her back once more. she hastily explains, “it’s just a silly little infatuation, i’ll get over it sooner or later.”

“let’s check in later to see about that..”

all of a sudden, there’s a sly kitty and bashful puppy in the studio.

👤 : what are your abilities?

“i have quite a few, yet the most notable is imitation. what that means is i can copy others’ abilities and use them how ever i wish.” naeva recites it without much thought, it sounds like she’s explained it before.

her companion hums, thoughtfully nodding along. “you mentioned allure before, is it okay to explain what that entails?”

“oh yes, i have this special song that when heard, lowers a person’s guard enough for me to take control of their mind.” her voice falls a little towards the end as she adds, “but i swear i’ve never used it unless absolutely necessary, like in a battle.”

calista pats the lavender-haired girl’s armrest, a small gesture of assurance. despite that already being enough, she tells her, “we believe you.”

👤 : heli or jino?

the girls share a look of confusion before one falls into a stream of laughter. it doesn’t matter if she covers her mouth, everyone can tell calista’s gigging at the question. on the other hand, a mortified naeva slouches in her seat and stares up at the sky.

fly high naeva’s spirit!

once she’s calmed down, calista can’t help but note, “that’s such a random question, what on earth..” 

“it’s not when you know someone who’d definitely ask this.” naeva mumbles, the face of a certain troublemaker immediately popping in her mind. but before she can begin plotting what to do with the culprit, she recalls the question. 

she thinks about saying the name of the boy with the pretty golden eyes; the boy who’d stay up with her, talking about everything and nothing while her lithe fingers played with his ebony tresses..

“jino. in terms of people i’m close to, he’s right on solon’s heels. even though he can’t be near water, he always comes with me to the sea to make sure i’m safe. whenever i don’t feel good about myself, he’s popping out of thin air to dispel the negativity.” 

she wanted to say more, but the words don’t get past the tip of her tongue. instead, she beams with a crescent eyed smile.

“to my candlelight, let’s stay together forever, okay?”

“we have made it, thanks for sticking around ‘til the end!” calista bows in gratitude, her companion shortly following suit.

“if you enjoyed this episode, please tap the like button..” naeva send a glance to calista to check if she’s doing the outro right and gets a thumbs up in return. “then subscribe to this channel if you’d like to see more, thank you.”

“this was enhypen and pandora’s calista..” 

“accompanied by naeva..”

“..and we flipped your heart.”

taglist : @stealanity​ @lost-leopard-beanie​ @annoyingbitch83​ @starmaniic​ — send an ask / dm to be added !

#⌯ ̤̮ ... variety ˖ gone in the mourning #enhypen scenarios #enha scenarios #enhypen smau #enha smau #enhypen addition #enha addition #enhypen 8th member #enha 8th member #kpop addition #kpop idol oc #fictional idol community #fictional idol oc

[thecurrentonline]

What Is "Wednesday Star" Jenna Ortega's Net Worth? Updated 2023

Jenna Ortega Net worth: She is an American actress best known for her roles in hit TV shows like "Jane the Virgin" and "Stuck in the Middle." She recently got a lot of attention thanks to her role in "The Wednesday Series." Numerous followers are looking for Jenna Ortega's net worth. the web series How much does she make? You can determine her value with the aid of this article. Why not find out? Jenna Ortega's Career Jenna Ortega began her career in 2012, but she had been interested in acting since she was six years old and had started giving auditions by the time she was eight. She soon made her acting debut in 2012 with the Rob television series. Despite playing a very small part, she attracted a lot of attention. Later, she made guest appearances on CSI, Rake, and other shows. She joined the cast of the popular show Jane the Virgin in 2014, which served as something of a career turning point for her. She continued to work on the show through 2019 and won praise from critics. She soon worked on a number of popular shows, including Wednesday, Richie Rich, and Stuck in the Middle. With Iron Man 3, Jenna Ortega made her film debut in 2013. Later, she was given the opportunity to work on a number of popular films, including The Fallout, The Babysitter: Killer Queen, and Insidious: Chapter II. https://www.instagram.com/p/ClufwvgJzJu/ Jenna Ortega's Salary Unfortunately, the exact age of the 20-year-old is unknown. However, according to Deadline, starting salaries for actors on Netflix series like 13 Reasons Why and Stranger Things were between $20,000 and $60,000 per episode. It's likely that Jenna's starting pay fell somewhere in the higher end of that range given that she was an established, relatively well-known actress by the time Wednesday debuted and she served as its dazzling lead. Given Wednesday's first season's success, it is now anticipated that her salary will continue to rise. It's not improbable to say that Jenna could eventually be making the same amount if Wednesday is renewed (here's hoping!). In later seasons, the stars of Stranger Things and 13 Reasons Why started earning up to $200,000 and $300,000 per episode, respectively. Related Article: Is “Wednesday Star” Jenna Ortega Dating Someone? Jenna Ortega's Sponsored Social Posts After Wednesday, Ortega's Instagram following "exploded," according to Popcrave, who claimed that she added 10 million new followers in just 10 days. The going rate for a sponsored post that reaches Ortega's 31.9 million (and counting) followers as of December 13 is $78,869, and it is only likely to increase in line with her follower count. Now Ortega is using her influence to her bank's advantage. In spite of the sizeable payout, Ortega's feed is carefully curated and free of advertisements; she hasn't published a sponsored post since Wednesday's drop. She isn't above making money off the platform, though. Because I believe it is unhealthy for everyone involved, I must consider my social media as a business platform. In an interview with The Face in November 2022, she stated, "I'd hate to be married to it." "I don't want to worry about how people will perceive me there or how I appear to them." Just get to work! simply posts about work. I'll discuss anything so that people can view me as an actor rather than a spokesperson, which will allow me to concentrate on that. Related Article : Because Of Her Role In Wednesday Many People Think She Is Not Straight Jenna Ortega's Assets And Car Collection Home: American celebrity and highly successful actress Jenna Ortega Since she was a young girl, Ortega has been a citizen of California, where she has spent the majority of her time. She hasn't acquired any personal property as of yet. Car Collection Jenna Ortega has a small car collection despite not driving very frequently. She prefers to move easily because she is still very young. She currently owns a Mercedes, an Audi Q5, and several other vehicles. What Is Jenna Ortega’s Net Worth? Ortega Has Set the Stage for an Exceptionally Successful Screen Career at Just 20 Years Old. She is estimated by celebrities to be worth $4 million. Wednesday is almost certainly going to be renewed, and as her star is rising, her bank account will undoubtedly experience a boost as she bargains her rate on upcoming projects. Name Jenna Marie Ortega Net Worth (2023) $4 Million Profession Actress Monthly Income And Salary $20,000 + Yearly Income And Salary $250,000  + Last Updated 2023 Jenna Ortega Net Worth Growth Net Worth in 2023 $4 Million Net Worth in 2022 $3.75 Million Net Worth in 2021 $3.5 Million Net Worth in 2020 $3.25 Million Net Worth in 2019 $3 Million Net Worth in 2018 $2.75 Million Read More - Netflix Blonde Fact Vs Fiction: Here’s What The Movie Changed And What Happened! - Who Is David Dahmer? Where Is He Now? Everything You Need To Know! Read the full article

[durmstrange]

Cowardice - Fred Weasley

Hello and welcome to another Fred fic.  I swear I do too many pics involving the Yule Ball.  Hope you enjoy. :)

warnings: mentions of food

word count: 1,447

When news of the Yule Ball spread, you about choked on your own tongue. You were at a time in your life where your personal life was already complicated enough, let alone adding a huge social event on top of it.  Despite this, you had been informally seeing Fred outside of your already close friendship for some time now, nearing a year, actually, and you had no idea what you were to him.

You often shared kisses and affection like it was going out of style, only whenever you were in private, but you frequently told each other how much the other meant to you, but you were not labelled, or serious, you could even say, because outside of the Golden Trio and the Weasley siblings, no one really knew of your untold relationship.  You were just… together.  

A week or so after the announcement of the Yule Ball, as you ate breakfast with your closest friends, Ginny, Fred, and George, you got a rather large parcel from your mother.  Your face turned as red as their hair when it landed in front of you, crushing your toast and jam as if it were nothing, and you watched as your mother’s owl fled the building as if it knew you were going to be petrified.  “Oh, no,” you whispered to yourself as your friends watched with curious eyes.  You looked at the splattered jam on the table and huffed as well.  “Bloody bird has no boundaries,” you also muttered as you examined the jam also on your sweater.

Fred and George cackled at the incident, and even Ginny giggled a little bit at your splattered breakfast.  After a moment of silence from you passed, with you just sitting and staring at nothing with your hands on the table next to the parcel, Fred spoke up with the same smirk on his lips.  “Well, aren’t you going to open it?”  He asked you with humor laced all through his voice.

With your lips slightly parted, you snatched the parcel up in your arms, shaking your head.  “Ah, no, I am not.  It’s my Yule Ball dress,” you said quickly despite the fact that you were getting jam all over the sleeves of your sweater now, on top of the splattered jam just about everywhere else, and you still held it to your body as if it were gold.  There was no way you were going to let anyone see you in the dress before the ball.

Excitedly, Ginny gasped.  “Oh!  I want to see!” she exclaimed and reached for the package, but you swung out of her reach like a child and stood from the table with a smile playing upon your lips.

“Absolutely not,” you argued with her as the twins watched you curiously and humorously.  “I am going to debut it the night of the ball, of course.  I don’t want anyone to see it beforehand,” you explained lamely, trying to ease the situation you have created by yourself.  You knew you were making a big deal out of nothing, but it was your preference.

George tilted his head to the side slightly, an amused look on his face. “Have you already got a date?” he asked you as you checked your watch for the time. Luckily, you had time before the group left for Hogsmeade to change and hide your dress away somewhere deep in your dormitory.

Again, you sighed with an annoyed look on your face.  “No,” you answered stubbornly and glanced at Fred, who was equally as amused.  Ginny laughed quietly, knowing exactly what you were getting at.

Fred snickered at you.  “Why are you hiding your dress if you don’t even have a date, yet, you loon?”  He asked you sassily and as a smirk formed maliciously on your face, you watched as his own smile left his handsome features. Oh, he left this opportunity out in the open.

George had already begun laughing before you even had begun to speak. “Well, if the guy I have been seeing rather often lately would just man up and ask me, then I would truly have a reason to hide it, wouldn’t I?” you questioned Fred hypothetically and sarcastically with a smug smile on your lips that made him turn red in the face.  After you had finished speaking, Ginny and George were cackling as you turned on your heels, leaving the Great Hall triumphantly.  

~.~

A few days later, after your longest day of classes of the week, you trudged towards your dormitory, ready to go to bed for the night and skip out of dinner, like you shamefully usually did.  As you walked, you noticed that most people were actually heading to the Great Hall already, meaning you might actually be able to fall asleep quickly.

Before you were even into your doorway yet, you were already kicking our shoes into the room and pulling the cloak you wore off, discarding it on the trunk at the bottom of your bed.  But after you did this, you froze in your spot and your heart about launched out of your chest.  “Fred! You scared the bones out of me,” you scolded the boy who leaned against one of your four posts with a smile on his face.  Dramatically, you held your hand to your heart.  

“I’ve become rather good at that, haven’t I?”  He asked you softly and calmly, which was slightly out of his normal demeanor.  As you approached him, he held his hand out for you to take, and you did.  You allowed him to pull you into him and he nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck.  “I got you something,” he told you after a moment of silence and you pulled back, looking at him curiously.  

Fred pulled away entirely, digging into the pocket of his black slacks and fished something out that he held in his hand.  “I should have done this long ago, and I am incredibly sorry for leading you on this long,” he began to explain and you only became further confused, tilting your head to the side.  “My mum told me that when a girl is special enough to stay by your side, even when you do the stupidest of things, then you need to keep her.”  He paused, trying to articulate his words but you could tell that he was struggling with it. He sighed, a small smile on his lips, and continued, “I suppose what I am trying to get at is that I would really like to be able to call you my girlfriend to, you know, everyone.  At the Yule Ball and all.”  Fred ducked his head quickly, his face redder then you had ever seen in your time of knowing him.

Your heart was thudding in your chest as he spoke and you found yourself falling in love with him so quickly.  With a smile playing on your lips, you gave him a shallow nod.  “I’d really like that, too,” you agreed softly and Fred smiled widely, taking your hand and placing something cool in it as he brought you close to him, kissing the top of his head.

“I hope it matches your mystery dress,” he nervously teased you as you opened your hand out of curiosity and gasping the moment your eyes landed on the silver necklace in your hand.  “When I was speaking with my mum about you, she suggested I give you a gift to make up for being such a coward.  It's a family heirloom, actually,” he added, obviously proud of himself.  “I just added a little to it.”

The silver necklace held a small, beautiful red gem in a sleek clasp, engraved with a FW on the back, which was your favorite part by far.  “Fred, you didn’t have to do that,” you murmured, looking at him with the biggest eyes he had ever seen, and he only smiled.  You were at a loss for words, and couldn’t believe that he cared that much.

He kissed the top of your head once more, and you looked up to him again, away from the necklace, and you kissed him hard, wrapping your arm around his shoulders to bring his lips down to yours.  Fred chuckled into the kiss, pulling away and taking the necklace from your hand.  “Go, on. Turn around,” he instructed and you laughed, doing as you were told, and you felt the cool metal against your skin as he clasped it into place. “Perfect,” Fred murmured to himself as he caught view of you in your roommate’s mirror across the room.

“By the way, it matches my dress well.”

- 

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Weasley Twins Taglist: @wand3ringr0s3​ @kpopgirlbtssvt​

#fred weasley #Fred Weasley imagine #Fred Weasley fanfiction #Fred Weasley fanfction #Fred Weasley one shot #fred weasley fanfic #Fred Weasley oneshot #Fred Weasley fluff #Fred Weasley x reader #fred weasley x you #harry potter #Harry Potter fanfic #Harry Potter fanfiction #hogwarts #tw food

[ritz-hell-hotel]

Retail Therapy - Luke Patterson

Julie and the Phantoms

Request?: Nope.

Word Count: 4.8K+

Summary: Alive!Luke x Alive!Reader/ Alive!JATP x Reader. After a fight with your parents, you go out for a little retail therapy and meet a certain Rockstar. I think I will prolly do a part 2 or more let me know if you want one, btw this is not proofread or edited. Luke sings to you in this chapter and he sings ‘Can’t take my eyes off you’ by Frankie Valli and The Four Seasons, so you can listen to that if you want.

Warnings: I don’t think there’s any.

-

“Julie please, my parents and I just got into another huge fight about my art and I need moral support.”

“But my dad wants me to watch Carlos and I can’t bail again.”

“Please just get here! I need you, Jules,” Y/N radiated distress and it was clear to all the people in the Claire’s she was currently in.

“Fine, I can call my tía. I’ll be there in an hour, but you owe me an ice cream cone!” Julie said laughing, Julie had been Y/N’s best friend since they met in the seventh grade when they both accidentally wore the same shirt three days in a row and became friends, they often would laugh about it. Y/N told her where to meet and thanked her friend quickly hanging up the phone. She heaved all her shopping bags up and looked around.

“Why am I even in this store?!” She hmphed loudly drawing the attention of the other shoppers once again. She marched out of the store towards the food court where she was meeting Julie. A new store caught her eye and she stopped for a minute debating if she had enough room for more bags. She quickly made her mind up deciding that she could make room, after all, she had her dad’s Platinum Amex and she was not going to waste this opportunity. Y/N walked quickly to the entrance of the quaint book store. She turned into the book store slamming into something, it was just her luck to run into a wall today and I mean why not seeing as the rest of her life was falling to pieces around her. She fell onto her back looking at the ceiling her bags scattered around her. 

“Oh my god! I’m so sorry! Are you okay?” A boy came into her sight. He had shaggy brown hair and was wearing a light yellow apron with a name tag. Guess she didn’t run into a wall after all, but again that was just her luck. Her eyes began to water as all the emotion crashed upon her like a tsunami. She gritted her teeth pulling herself together.

“I’m fine,” Y/N looked at his name tag. “Luke.”

“Woah how’d you know my name?” Luke stepped back and Y/N let out a breath of laughter.

“Nametag,” She said as the tears began to pool in her eyes.

“What? Oh my god, why are you crying?” Luke looked at her panicked, he didn’t do the best around crying girls. She held up a thumbs up. 

“I said I’m- I’m,” She coughed lightly trying her best to get out the words. 

“Here let me help you up,” Luke stuck out his hand to her nervously. She grabbed it and using her other hand tried to wipe the onslaught of tears off her face. Luke kept a hold of her hand pulling her to the back section of the store. 

“Um you can stay back here as long as you’d like,” He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly and accidentally running into the desk behind him knocking a book off the desk he looked at it quickly.

“Here you can read this maybe it’ll make you feel better,” he picked the book up shoving the book into her arms. He ran out of the room quickly.

“Oh? I- Thank you!” Y/N called out into the store. Luke ran back into the room his arms heaving all the girl’s bags.

“How were you carrying this much?” He wheezed dropping the bags by her. She laughed wiping more tears away and smearing her mascara. Luke backed up again.

“I have to get back to work but just leave when you want and if you need anything I’ll be up at the front counter,” he nodded at the girl giving her a thumbs up, and walked out again. She sat at the back of the store composing herself. She picked up the book looking at the title. It was ‘The Outsiders’ and a pretty beaten up copy at that the book was filled up with loose pages, she flipped through it and set it down on the table next to her. She turned to grab her bags. She didn’t notice but the book slipped off the table into one of her bags. She also didn’t notice her journal/ sketchbook drop from her purse as she grabbed everything trying to flee as quickly as she could. She collected the rest going out into the main store and heading to the counter.

“Thanks again for the help,” She leaned on the counter gazing at the boy in front of her.

“No problem, um you can come back anytime, that is if you want to of course no pressure,” Luke stumbled over his words.

“Of course, yeah,” She nodded, but she was not going to come back, not after that humiliating experience. He smiled dopily at her.

“Can’t wait,” he leaned on the counter as well.

“Um yeah,” she felt a twinge of guilt at the totally sweet look he was giving her. Her phone chimed loudly and she pulled it out.

“That would be my cue to leave,” She turned quickly dashing out of the store making her great escape.

“Bye then,” he waved confused. Y/N pulled out her phone checking the text.

‘Where are you? I got here 10 minutes ago.’ - From Julie. Y/N sighed speeding up her strides to get to the food court quicker. She spied Julie sitting at a table in the middle of the court. She made her way through the throng of people and sat down at the table setting her bags down under it. 

“What happened?” Julie asked eyeing the girl.

“I had a bit of a break down in a store, but a nice employee helped me out so I’m good,” Y/N laughed quickly.

“Are you okay, your eyes are really puffy. Do you need eye drops?” Julie stuck her hand in her purse and Y/N stopped her laughing again.

“I don’t need anything I’m good I promise, I just want to spend time with my best friend,” Y/N laid her hands down on the table in front of her. Julie rested her hands on top of the girls.

“If it’s any consolation I am supportive of your art,” Julie smiled sweetly. Y/N’s heart melted at the girl’s words, it did mean a lot to her.

“Thanks, Julie, now if you could convince my parents to do the same then that would be a dream come true,” a weak smile crept its way onto Y/N’s face. Julie squeezed her hand.

“How about we go get that ice cream and we can talk a bit and walk around, I think we both need it,” Julie stood up interlocking her hand with Y/N’s and pulling her towards the creamy treat.

-

It’d been a few weeks since the mall incident and things were not getting any easier for Y/N. Fights seemed to be on the daily now and the yelling was beginning to drive the girl insane. So she spent as little time as possible at her house only going over to sleep and do school work, other than that she was at the park painting or reading through the book that had slipped into her bag. She had planned on returning it to the booking clerk after she had read it, but now it had been three weeks and she had yet to. She would have hung out with Julie, but she was busy with her new band and nonstop rehearsals, they were set to debut at a spirit rally at school next week and they needed to be perfect. She still hadn’t met the band, but she had permission from Julie to crash anytime she wanted and she was planning on taking full advantage of this pass soon.

Her favorite pass time though was reading the book though so she had kept it, she loved to just read and look at the little notes and doodles in the margins, it really gave her a view of what was going on in Luke’s head. Although sometimes it was hard to decipher the hieroglyphics that was Luke’s handwriting.

She had discovered that the writings of S.E. Hinton were not the only thing hidden away in the eggshell-colored pages, there were journal entries and songs. She didn’t feel comfortable reading through the entries but she sure did love reading the works of musical genius, Luke’s, songs. They were so well written and heartfelt it helped her understand this boy that she barely knew, this boy so full of passion, feeling, emotions, and kindness.

And that’s where she was now reading a song of loss and regret under the cloudy sky. One that she related to personally, it reminded her of her parents and that even if she was having a hard time with them she would always love them even if they weren’t in the picture.

“If you could only know I never let you go,” she hummed along to the words, and sure she didn’t know the tune the words were initially meant for but she could sure try and make her own melody. But her phone interrupted her startling her out of her own little world within the words. She hurriedly wiped at her tear-stained cheeks and took the device out. It was 4:30, Julie and the Phantoms were at rehearsals right now and this was the perfect opportunity to infiltrate the jam session, so Y/N hopped on her bike and sped towards the Molina residence.

-

Y/N stopped on the cobblestone path leading to the studio loft and set her bike against the stone wall. She could already hear the music drifting from the open window of the studio. She crept to the porcelain white door and stood on her tiptoes looking through the long windows. Y/N could see Julie on the piano and three boys surrounding her. There was a tall lanky one wearing a pink shirt and had a fanny pack slung across his chest, he had blond hair and was on the drum, there was a raven-haired one clad in flannel and leather he was on bass guitar and another one that wasn’t facing Y/N, from what she could see he was a brunet and was wearing jeans and a blue sleeveless hoodie, and he was on a guitar she thought. Julie looked up and jumped a little but she just laughed it off stopping the music and gesturing for Y/N to come inside. Just as Y/N was about to move away from the door the brunet turned around her her heart stopped she could hear all the blood rushing and it was deafening.

It was Luke from the bookstore. Y/N felt herself pale and she quickly hid from view she slid down to sit against the door and the pavement, her eyes darted around looking for a place to hide, any place at all. But before she could move the door gave way and she fell onto her back. Julie had opened the door at the whole band formed a circle around the starfishes girl. Luke broke out into a fit of giggles.

“We have got to stop meeting like this,” he managed to get out through the laughter. Y/N deadpanned and scoffed.

“Tell me about it,” she sighed. Luke came to a stop and offered her a hand. She did not grab the hand though instead opting to roll onto her stomach and push herself up. Luke lowered his hand awkwardly and Alex snickered.

“You two know each other?” Julie asked looking between the pair.

“Kind of,” Y/N shrugged looking at the dopey grinned boy. “We met at the mall a few weeks ago, you remember Julie we had an ice cream cone that day.

Julie nodded and looked at Luke.

“Oh, so this is the guy you stole a book from!” Julie laughed at the panicked face you made. Luke sent Y/N a confused look.

“Oh my god! I’m so sorry I’ve been meaning to return it,” Y/N dug through her backpack and pulled out the book victorious. She handed the book to Luke quickly and added a quick explanation and a sorry.

“Hey it’s okay, you kind of left something too, I had been wondering where it had disappeared to though,” he laughed and snatched Y/N’s journal from his bag handing it to her. Throughout their exchange Julie, Alex, and Reggie just stood awkwardly shuffling their feet.

“Oh! I thought my dad took this... Oh My god wait please tell me you didn’t look,” Y/N paled again. Luke and Y/N stared at each other for a minute silently.

“Um only a little,” Luke looked down to the ground guiltily. Julie coughed and clasped her hands together.

“Why don’t we play something for Y/N while she’s here!” She said sitting down at the piano. The rest of the boys picked up their instruments, Alex sitting at the drums, Reggie standing with his bass next to Alex and the door, and Luke standing next to the piano and the couch. Y/N took a seat on the couch farthest away from Luke, she was feeling a bit awkward.

“So this is Bright,” Julie said to Y/N as well as making the boys aware of what they’d be playing for her. Julie played the first notes on the piano taking a breath and smiling, she was really in her element right now and it showed.

“Sometimes I think I’m falling down. I wanna cry, I’m calling out,” Julie sang out hitting each note with perfection. Y/N got goosebumps on her arms while listening to Julie’s voice, it was really breathtaking.

“For one more try, to feel alive.” The boys still hadn’t played their instruments and Y/N looked at each of them confused. Luke sent her a wink and threw his guitar over his shoulder with finesse. Y/N smiled brightly and gave him thumbs up. She reached into her bag pulling out a paper and a pen. She wrote a 9.5 

“What?! I deserve a 10,” Luke frowned strumming a note as Julie sang, “Life is a risk but I will take it, close my eyes, and jump.”

“It’s because you’re a show-off,” Y/N held out the f sound. Luke laughed and threw his head back.

“I’ll you show you what showing off really looks like,” he grinned at her. Just ask he said that Julie sang, “Come on let’s run!”

And that's when the boys hopped into action the music hitting Y/N like a wave. Luke played the guitar his hands moving effortlessly on the frets, he had so much passion in his eyes and Y/N couldn’t tear hers away. Luke looked at her holding her gaze intently.

“Life is a risk but we will take it, close my eyes and jump,” Luke’s voice came out gravely and husky, giving Y/N goosebumps once again. Reggie sang along with him dancing around the middle of the loft. Y/N felt like the breath was knocked out of her, the band was, to put it simply, dazzling. She had so many thoughts for them but she knew she it’d be impossible to tell them how amazing they were in words. Luke walked closer to Y/N kneeling in front of her while still playing his instrument. 

“Come on let’s run!” Luke sang to her, the rest of the band along with him. He hit the high note with ease and Y/N breathed in deeply. Luke continued to sing, but he pulled her up quickly and they danced together, it was a mess of rocking together and lots of spinning on Y/N’s part while Luke jumped up and down still having to play. Reggie came in and joined them, and he and Alex shared a look. They all jumped around in a circle and Y/N jumped onto the couch singing along with the chorus.

“Shine together bright forever!” Y/N picked up her water bottle using it as a mic. Luke couldn’t keep his eyes off her, she was electric. 

“In times that I doubted myself, I feel like I needed some help,” Luke sang and the only instrument playing was coming from the piano. Luke walked up to the couch below Y/N and they stared at each other.

“Stuck in my head, with nothing left,” Luke sang to her. Julie shot Y/N a look telling her to sing with him.

“And when I feel lost and alone, I know that I can make it home,” Y/N sang nervously fearing she’d mess up the words, but Luke just smiled at her and Y/N instantly felt at ease. Y/N looked away from Luke for a minute nodding at Julie and they sang together.

“Fight through the dark, and find the spark!!” Julie raising her voice and held out the note. Luke still couldn’t pull his gaze away and he lifted Y/N off the couch spinning her and making her squeal, she was set on the ground and she started dancing again. 

“We will fight to shine together! Bright forever!” They all sang out and the song ended. Y/N laughed with glee and jumped up and down.

“You guys are amazing!” She smiled at Alex and hit Reggie’s shoulder, feeling at home with the guys already, even if they only met a few minutes ago. 

“I’m gonna run inside the house and grab some snacks and we can hang out!” Luke ran to the door and exited. Y/N laughed, he didn’t even ask if she was free, she was but still. She enveloped Julie in a hug and they laughed together. Y/N’s phone rang in her pocket and she pulled it out and looked at the screen, her mom was calling. A deep frown set into her face and she clutched the phone.

“I’m gonna take this,” She said and made her way out sitting against the stone wall and taking a deep breath trying to prepare herself. She hit the answer button and held the phone to her ear.

“Hello?” She whispered.

“Y/N Y/L/N, you need to get home right now, you have been gone long enough. Get over yourself, you will not become an artist and you will do what we say we are your parents,” Y/N’s mom and dad said, not even letting Y/N get a word in. She breathed in deeply and shut her eyes tight willing herself not to cry.

“Mom, Dad, I’m not coming home,” Y/N got out her voice faltering. Her dad scoffed.

“Don’t be ridiculous you will come home immediately,” Her mom sighed. Y/N shook her head even though her parents couldn’t see.

“I’m not coming home not again and not ever, not until you support me,” she almost lost herself there but she shut her eyes again keeping the tears at bay, she wouldn’t cry for something she needed to do.

“I’m gonna be staying somewhere else from now on, I’ve already got all the stuff that I need and you won’t see me again until I prove you wrong.”

“People will like my art and even if they don’t I like my art and it’s what I’m passionate about and I won’t stop, I won’t give up, I can’t,” Y/N hung up the phone not even giving them a chance to respond, she clicked into her settings turning off her location and stuck her phone next to her. She brought her knees to her chest and she breathed deeply, she heard someone taking a seat next to her, she didn’t look assuming it was Julie.

“I know what it’s like,” Luke laid his head against the wall and put his hands at his sides. Y/N’s head shoots towards Luke.

“It’s you! I thought you were Julie,” Y/N said. Luke started to get up.

“I’m so sorry I’ll go,” he stood up all the way. Y/N grabbed his hand and pull him back down they were now sitting shoulder to shoulder and looking at each other. Y/N breathed in deeply again the tears finally going away.

“Stay.”

“I didn’t mean to eavesdrop drop, by the way,” Luke laid his hand on top of her hesitantly. She laughed shaking her head.

“It’s okay, can you tell me about it?” She asked him referring to what he said earlier. He nodded slowly trying to articulate what he was thinking.

“Okay, but bear with me I’m gonna start at the beginning,” he stated and Y/N intertwined their finger hoping to make him more comfortable.

“My mom and dad bought me my first guitar when I was about 8,” he started squeezing her hand.

“When you said beginning I didn’t think it’d be beginning, beginning,” she laughed. He sent her an annoyed look and she giggled laying her head on his shoulder.

“They didn’t get me into lessons but my neighbor ended up teaching me, I knew immediately that music was what I wanted to do and my parents didn’t quite feel the same but they let me continue playing regardless, but then I started a band called Sunset Curve when I was fifteen, that’s when they tried to take my guitar away,” he deflated slightly and Y/N nestled into him a bit more.

“Of course I hid it where we were practicing and didn’t tell them where, but the fights got so bad that I ran away, on Christmas Eve.”

“Now I’m staying here, but I get how it feels to not be supported by the ones who matter most, so if you need someone who knows what you’re going through you can come to me if you want,” he said facing her as she took her head off his shoulder. They were centimeters apart at this point, they were practically breathing in each other’s air.

“You’re staying at Julie’s?” She asked their noses almost touching.

“Yeah in the loft with Alex, he’s not living at home either, his parents weren’t cool after he came out to them,” he said sadly his eyes fluttering shut. She studied his face, he had freckles that you could only see close up, and there was a small scar just on the bridge of his nose.

“It’s cool that you guys have each other,” Y/N interlocked both their hands.

“You could have us too,” he whispered. “If you want us.”

“I’d really like that I think,” she moved in closer, her lips ghosting over his as he whispered, “I’m glad you want me, us.” They knew each other better than anyone, sure they hadn’t been together long but they’d seen into each other's world through music and writing and art, they saw the most intimate parts of each other. A crash from the garage and Alex fell through the crack in the door and he shot up looking like a deer in headlights. Luke and Y/N jumped away from each other and Y/N hit her bike knocking it over and the contents of her other bag on it spilled out, a mess of clothes and tampons came out and Luke looked horrified. His eyes fell upon a single bra and he stumbled back covering his eyes. Alex ran back into the studio slamming the door behind him. Y/N quickly scooped up her stuff putting it back into her bag making sure to zip it up this time. Luke still was on the ground covering his eyes.

“You can look now,” Y/N let out an airy laugh. Luke shook his head.

“I’m too embarrassed,” he sat up still covering his eyes. Y/N scooted over to him so that she was sitting in front of him on her knees, she brought her hands up to his slowly moving them away. She and Luke looking into one another’s eyes for the millionth time that night. She slowly tore her gaze away and stood up.

“I should probably go find a hotel to stay at,” she whispered picking up her bike. Luke jumped up grabbing her wrist.

“You can stay here! I mean if it’s okay with Julie, we’ll have to ask,” he said holding onto her hands and grinning at her.

“It’s okay with me!” They heard Julie’s voice from inside the studio. Y/N laughed pulling Luke into a tender hug, he didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around her hips. She rested her head in the crook of his neck and whispered, “Thank you for everything Luke.”

“You’re welcome,” he kissed the top of her head lightly pulling her in tighter. Drops of rain began to dribble into them until it was a downpour. Luke tried to pull her inside but Y/N pulled him back and they spun together in the rain. Y/N let out a joyful and bubbly laugh that had Luke laughing along with her.

“Sing to me music man,” Y/N spun Luke around and dipped him. He grinned at her and began to sing.

“You’re just too good to be true,” they spun together again.

“Can’t take my eyes off of you, you’d be like heaven to touch, I wanna hold you so much,” Luke spun Y/N in and they rocked together. Y/N slid her arms up around Luke’s shoulders and they smiled at each other.

“At long last has arrived and I thank God I’m alive,” he smiled to himself at the line. Y/N spun away and jumped in the rain and a puddle of water exploded under her baby blue converse.

“You’re just too good to be true, Can’t take my eyes off of you,” and the lyrics were true for Luke he could pull his gaze from the magnetic girl in front of him. She held out her hand and Luke grasped it as she spun in her back hitting Luke’s chest. Luke sang more to her and he was almost to the chorus now.

“There are no words left to speak. But if you feel what I feel, please let me know that it’s real.”

“You’re just too good to be true, can’t take my eyes off of you,” Luke hummed and Y/N got ready to sing the chorus with him.

“I love you, baby!” They both sang out at the top of their lungs.

“And if it’s quite alright, I need you baby! To warm a lonely night!” Y/N sang out Luke practically had heart eyes. This wasn’t like before in the studio during Bright, Y/N wasn’t hesitant at all she had the aura of a thousand burning stars and the confidence to show it.

“I love you, baby! Trust in me when I sayyy!” Y/N sang again and Luke continued this time.

“Oh, pretty baby! Don’t bring me down I pray,” Luke spun down onto his knees and held his hands out to Y/N.

“Oh, pretty baby, now that I found you, stay! And let me love you, baby!” Luke sang pulling Y/N in they were once again close, chest to chest the rain streaming down their faces and their foreheads pressed together.

“Let me love you,” Luke sang in a whisper. Y/N hooked her arms around his neck and their lips were close, but not close enough to connect.

“You’re just too good to be true...” He closed in, their lips connecting for half a second but once again they were interrupted by a car beeping from in front of the house. Y/N pulled away quickly and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.

“That’s probably Julie’s dad with the pizza,” Luke said sadly knocking on the white door for the rest of the teens to come out.

“That was quite the show you two put on,” Reggie said as they came out. Y/N blushed which is something she didn’t normally didn't do so you knew she was very embarrassed.

“Shut up, dude,” Luke punched Reggie’s shoulder. They all began walking to the house, the rest of the teens holding umbrellas but Luke and Y/N were still exposed to the weather. They lagged behind a bit and Y/N took Luke’s hand into hers. They got to the door and they were the only ones out there. The rain pitter-pattered against the covering of the porch. Y/N and Luke faced each other and Y/N smiled at him.

“Thanks again for everything, Luke.”

“It’s my pleasure,” Luke stepped up to her.

“How did you know that was my favorite song?” She grinned at him.

“I have my ways, star,” he cooed and Y/N smiled at the nickname. She stood on her toes and pecked him on the cheek and she dashed inside. Luke stood there alone and touched his cheek softly and grinned, she’d be the death of him, but he was ready to do anything for her. He was falling, and falling hard for that matter.

-

Thank you for reading and let me know if you want a part two, and feel free to enter my taglist link in bio!

#charlie gillespie x reader #luke patterson x reader #luke patterson x you #luke patterson x julie molina #luke patterson #luke patterson x oc #jatp luke #luke jatp #luke julie and the phantoms #julie x luke #julie and the phat ones #julie and the fat ones #julie and the himbos #julie molina #jatp juke #jatp alex #carrie jatp #jatp julie #reggie jatp #jatp netflix #jatp fanfic #jatp fanfiction #jatp fandom #jatp fanart #jatp #luke x reader #jatp au #reader insert #jatp reader insert

[atinydise]

Stay for me

❦ Genre: Light angst, fluff.

❦ Pairing: Mingi.

❦ Word count: 911.

❦ A/N: Day 22 of “Ateez New Year Writings, Edition 2021” 🦋

"Congratulations Y/N!" Said Seonghwa, holding his glass of wine. "Thank you, Hwa," you bowed to him politely. "I can't believe our little Y/N is getting married soon." Added Yunho. "Stop being so dramatic." You rolled your eyes at the boys. "It's the same. You are not the little girl hanging out with us anymore." "You are getting married probably in the next months. Plus, you are going to leave South Korea, how can you stay so calm?" Asked Hongjoong. "I think I'm not realizing yet." You scratched your head, embarrassed. "Did someone saw Mingi?" Asked Yeosang. "It's been few minutes that I'm looking for him." You realized that you haven't see your best friend since the announcement of your engagement with your fiancé. "I will look for him." You walked far away from the loud music and tried to find Mingi. "Have you seen Mingi?" You asked your friend. She nodded and pointed at the balcony at the end of the hallway, "he's here for a while." "Thank you," you smiled sadly.

You walked slowly toward the tall boy. The atmosphere was tense, you hesitated to turn away and run to your fiancé. "Are you going to look at my back the whole night?" He asked, feeling your presence behind him. "How do you do that?" You stepped next to him. "No idea. I just can... feel you." He stared at the view in front of him. "Are you okay? You suddenly left and Yeosang is looking for you." "Tell him that I'm coming. I just needed to be alone." You raised a brow, "what's wrong Mingi? I can see when something is bothering you." "Nothing Y/N, you can leave and join back your fiancé." He smiled at you. "Just tell me, you know you can tell me everything." "No Y/N, I can't tell you everything anymore, because you are getting married." He finally turned around to look at you. "You don't understand what it's truly means." "Mingi..." "You are engaged," he started, "you are going to marry this... this piece of shit! And it's killing me." "H-He always have been nice to me." "You can't see that he doesn't care about you? He just wants to be married so he won't die alone." "He loves me." You mumbled. "Then if he loves you so much, he’s going to understand that you want to stay in South Korea. Where all of your friends and family are living." He raised his voice. "Not forcing you to go at the other side of this earth." "He has a job opportunity." "You've always been so naive." He sighed. "And you have a serious problem." You raised a brow, crossing your arms on your chest. "The problem is that you chose him over me!" He finally claimed angrily. You stared at him blankly. Mingi had been your best friend since elementary school. You always been close, even inseparable. During high school, you both crushed on each other. As you grew up, you saw Mingi in a different way and he did too. At your other friend's party, you finished kissing because of a bet. Even if everyone saw that you were liking each other, you decided to act like good friends. In any case you wanted to lose Mingi. When he debuted in Ateez, you both started to be more and more distant. He was an idol, so his schedule was full, and you met Jun at the college. You hung out often and decided to be his girlfriend even though your heart belonged to Mingi. Of course, your best friend was already against this relationship, but after few conversations, he calmed down and accepted it. "What I am supposed to do? Stay here, looking at you being so happy with someone else? That's what you want?" He asked. "I-I-" You stuttered, ignoring what to say. "I can do that for an hour, but don't ask me to do this for the rest of my life." He said. "I can pretend that I will be happy for you when I'll need to drop you at the airport, but it will be all fake." "I would never ask you to do something like this." "Am I supposed to be happy for you? I can't." "How are you supposed to do that while I can't even do it by myself?" You asked, your lips shaking a bit. Mingi immediately stopped to talk. What do you mean by that? That you weren't happy with him? "My parents loves Jun, that's why I accepted his proposition. I don't want to disappoint them." You confessed. Your best friend scoffed, "I don't know if you are too dumb or too nice." "Too dumb for loving you and too nice to make my parents mad." You sighed, ashamed of the coward that you were. "You just need to ask me some help and I'll get your life back." He handed his hand. You stared at him, hesitant. The moment you will hold it, meant that you would be drown by a thousand of problems and issues. But at least, you will be with him. "Don't be scared. You are young and you need to make the right decision for you." He said calmly. You didn't make a move. Your heart was torn between Mingi and your family. "I'll always get your back. No matter what." His smile was so reassuring for you. It felt like 'home'. "Stay for me Y/N." He whispered. Finally, you grabbed his hand. "Okay, let's do it. For us."

#ateez reactions #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez writings #ateez x reader #ateez mingi #ateez song mingi #ateez fluff #ateez angst #ateez happy ending

[bxllafanficc]

¡Skate/sing your hearts out! (Yuri Plisetsky x reader)

(part one)

part two part three part four part five. Find the rest on; Masterlist

Summary: After last year's cancellation of Figure Skating Grand Prix, Yuri Plisetsky finds himself unable to bring out his inner skater after a year of doing nothing but enjoy life like a regular teenager. That's when you enter the picture; We Are Voice Grand Awards's currently hottest competitive vocalist come first place two years in a row. Just like the other competitors of Grand Prix, it turns out that Victor and Yuuri faces the same issue. With an arrangement between Victor and Yakov, they agree to travel to Japan and hire you as a mutual coach for Yuri and Yuuri to help bring back the emotion into their performances like before, maybe even more intense than ever. Yuri however, who's never experienced issues with his coaches before, for some reason finds this one particularly difficult to coexist along with in their (reasonably) odd partnership. Warnings: none

*Yuri's POV*

"Remind me once again why we're going to Japan? It's clear you'd never take us there just because you miss Victor and I know by experience that it's not because of his apprentice."

First class flight like usual. The view out the airplane window of the sparkling city at nighttime below them would stun anybody but at this point, Yuri has traveled so many times it's only become regular sights and the lights of the streets are only plain colored spots in a dark void to him these days. One thing he will never feel comfortable with though is staying in the same seat for hours on end until the airplane arrives at its destination. His legs are itching from wanting to move around. He'll just have to jog it off back on the ground like every other trip in the past.

"You'll be spending some time with Yuuri Katsuki and Victor the following weeks to gain your fighting spirit back. You need to get back in touch with your emotions, remember?" Yakov slightly turned his posture towards the Russian skater beside him, folding his newspaper in half and putting it in his lap.

He only nodded with a slight hum. He could see Yakov's reasoning, some parts of it at least. He HAD been lacking in emotional performance ever since the new year began and it was time to get back into the mindset of winning yet another Grand Prix gold medal like last year. No, not last year. Last year's competition was cancelled after a minor pandemic spread through Russia and the nearby regions. In fear of the virus spreading, all competitions cancelled and larger crowded areas were forbidden to take place. Therefore Yuri's only been able to practice by himself and keeping himself fit for a possible competition next year. But a year of doing nothing can really change your spirit and afraid to admitting it to his coach, he's been missing several opportunities to hit the rink and stayed home watching anime or scrolled through social media instead.

But one thing he doesn't get is how Victor and Yuuri are gonna make him get his mindset in the right track again. He already won his first gold medal at his senior debut and he doubt that the Japanese skater will be in any better condition than Yuri's currently in right now. Pig-man must've been in a much worse state considering his boo Victor had to stay in Russia during the pandemic, unable to keep an eye on Yuuri's routines.

"Besides, there's a little surprise waiting for you where you'll be staying with the two of them. It better work out fine or else I'm out of ideas."

That caught his attention to say the least.

"Well if it's supposed to save me from the deep end then why be so secretive and hushy with it? Spill the news, Yakov."

The old man only grunted and picked up his newspaper once again and hid his face behind it. Well now he really wanted to know what it was. Clearly he would have to make some effort. Soon the article about a Russian charity event taking place this weekend got replaced with a clenched fist going straight through the back of the paper. Yuri expected some kind of reaction but Yakov only sighed and leaned back in his seat without even a flinch.

"It's no surprise if I tell you. I promised Victor to keep it a secret."

"Tell me."

"No."

Yuri groaned and folded his arms with a sour glare. The display in the ceiling told the traveler's that it was 10 minutes until landing so he gave up his attempts and let his eyes rest for a while. At least he would find out tomorrow, he assumed. It was 2am and he would be staying at a hotel close to the airport since it was too late to make rest of the trip in one day.

Yuri was out with the speed of a lightning bolt the second the plane doors opened. He sped past everyone before him and he didn't stop when he finally got outside. His feet carried him to run circles around the plane meanwhile he was waiting for Yakov to get out the normal way. It's a silly habit of his and he knows he looks stupid doing it but his coach has given him strict orders to not run away at one random direction like used to do at first. It would take like half an hour for him to be found once he took off, but only if he got lost.

"Yuri! Get over here!"

Well, there's his cue to get ready and head to the hotel. Finally he's able to get some sleep before he's forced to wake up early at dawn to head to Hot Springs and meet the two most annoying people in Japan.

...

He didn't even have time to eat breakfast. He overslept and got rushed to the cab with an angry Yakov behind him, newspaper folded tightly in his fist. The trip through the beautiful Japan would've been pleasant if Yuri hadn't dozed off every 10 seconds. He didn't get much sleep after all. He spent at least three hours thinking about the special surprise and raiding the free mini bar before he finally got to rest. At 8am he was woken up with banging on the door and now, at 10am, he was standing at the entrance of Hot Springs waiting for Yuuri's mom to announce their arrival. She hurried away somewhere with her usual bubbly happy self that Yuri had no idea how a person could be so... not moody all day long.

The place was as crowded with customers as last time and the two Russians were told to step inside to the more private parts of the building where the family lived along with Victor at the moment.

"Victor! How come my brand new lotion is used? You smelled a suspicious amount of peaches and wild berries at breakfast and there's no point denying it!" A fairly soft and modulated voice was heard from somewhere to the left where the private shower stalls were located. A couple seconds later a giggly Victor and Yuuri came through the direction of the living room and greeted Yuri with happy cheers. The slender white haired Russian caught Yakov in a bear hug, much to the old man's surprise. Yuuri extended his hand towards Yuri but Yuri didn't give any effort in taking it.

"Food. I'm starving."

Yuuri dropped his hand with a light blush but Victor pouted and let go of his former coach. Strong and clingy arms were suddenly wrapped around his chest and he couldn't breathe.

"So unpolite... Yuriooo we've missed you! Haven't you missed us?"

Yuri thrashed like a fish caught in a net and tried to hit the arms of the bastard trapping him. Yuuri joined in, only to get a kick in the hip. His stomach growled angrily and the endless void in his body didn't lighten up the experience a bit.

"Let go you old man! You too piglet!"

"I hoped you'd say it out loud but I know that deep down you've been missing us, Yuriii." Victor went to whisper in his ear with pouty lips but was swatted away by a backhand in his face. That finally caused him to let go and Yuri jumped out of reach for the two males.

"Hm... Or not." The expression he got from Victor was sad and pouty and the man earned a hand on his shoulder, put there by Yuuri. Yuri could only sigh and shake his head.

"Victor! Did you steal my shampoo too?! I will- Oh? What now?" Yuri turned around abruptly by the unfamiliar yet familiar voice behind him. His eyes widened.

The girl was standing to the left of the hall, seemingly coming from the shower. A curious hand rested against the wall beside her and her face was covered in a grey clay face mask, a toothbrush lazily hanging from the corner of her lips. Her (h/c) eyes glistened with mild shock along with her mouth hanging slightly open.

"You are early... Victor, you told me they would arrive at 1pm1!" She pointed a strict finger at the tall man who scratched the back of his head with a hesitant laugh. Her eyes narrowed and she grabbed her toothbrush. Because even if she was standing unprepared in front of two strangers, she would at least not forget to brush her teeth in the process, as you do.

Yuri might've considered it normal if it wasn't for that she was almost naked. Two towels were the only fabric hiding her, one wrapped around her dripping figure and the other tied up in her hair.

"Yeah, about that! I kind of mixed up the time of their arrival and your meeting with the press, that's, by the way now when I think of it, not actually cancelled but later today. Silly of me to forget, right?"

She eyed him as though her bullshit meter was ticking in the red zone and let out a huff. Yuri had to advert his gaze when it suddenly felt intruding to eye her the way he did. He also turned away because a light tint of pink was creeping up his cheeks.

"Right. Thanks for the early update. I appreciate it, really. I'll be with you again in 30 minutes. Don't wait up for me." And with that, she was gone. The silence of the men maintained for a few moments until Yuuri coughed with an awkward smile, his red cheeks still visible even after the girl had disappeared. 'It's a little weird to blush at your almost naked sister' he thought.

"So food, right? Mom is preparing pork cutlet bowls for you, Yurio, since she remembered how much you liked them last time-" He didn't have to say it twice. Yuri was off to the dining area before the man even finished saying 'pork cutlet bowl'.

#yuri plisetsky #yuri plisetsky x reader #yuriart #yuri katsuki #yuri on ice #victor nikirofov #anime fanfic #animelove #fanfiction

[antigoneidk]

falling in love in nyc|p.p.

pairing: peter parker x reader

summary: sometimes deep connections lead to fast and strong feelings.

warnings: fluff

___

It all happened fast. You were just a girl with dreams that came to a big city hoping that you could live the life you always wanted. Study in your favourite college, find true friends, get money, rent your own apartment with a view, take risks, get drunk, drive around blasting to music, be independent.

He was a boy with the same dream. To move to New York, study science, hanging around with his friends 'till the sun comes up, find new hobbies, get new experiences, feel free from other responsibilities.

None of you had plans for finding love any time soon. You were so busy planning your future, he was hurt from the past. There was no room for falling.

It was 2:37, a cool summer Friday night-morning-when your worlds collide. You had your hair down, a little mascara and some lip gloss on your lips. Your fingers intertwined with your friend's one while she was singing lyrics from a song and you were laughing at her voice breaks.

He was wearing his old jeans and a dark green shirt combined with white sneakers. His eyes red due to his heavy schedule and the lack of sleep. His ears buzzing on the inside, his friends on the side making his pain worse.

He catched your eyes, his vibe different from what you had seen all this time staying there, sending waves that had some sort of a power towards you, a magic you didn't know that existed. How his slightly curled hair fell in front of his face, how his hands rested in his pockets, how his brown eyes landed on yours.

It felt wrong to just let him pass you just like that. It felt almost illegal to let him leave and never see his face again. He had this style that you swore it matched yours. Two souls that found each other out of nowhere and could vibe together.

You took the risk. You let go of your friend and turned around to face him walking slowly far away. "Hey" you shouted and saw all four boys turning your way and stopping their movements. You started making your way towards them, the girl behind you following in silence, surprised by your actions but in a good way.

"Hey" you heard him saying as he took a step forward. He was feeling the same attraction as you. His spidey sense hitting red. He scanned your body while you were walking, he could feel the nervousness from miles away.

"Um-I am y/n" you extended your hand waiting for his.

"I'm Peter. Nice to meet you" he grabbed your cold hand, his warm one sending shivers down your spine. You were just realizing what you were about to do, it was too late though.

"I know it might sound crazy but do you guys wanna join us? We were just walking around the city. Not something special you know. But if you guys are going somewhere I'm so sorry for-"

"No we are not going somewhere specifically. I just want to know why we should come with you girls and not just continue our own road?"

"Do we look like the bad guys?"your friend made her debut, all of them shaking their heads in denial. "Then why not? See it as an opportunity to make new friends in this big ass city" her confidence was a a trait you were jealous of and blamed yourself for not working for it more.

"I'm down" Peter said, your smile taking his breath away. You seemed like the most beautiful creature nature could make to him. Who would have thought that New York City could hide as as beauty as you?Or him?

"So? What are we waiting for? LETS GO!" all of them jumped and started walking the direction you were following moments ago, a laugh escaping your friends lips as she started talking with them.

And you followed few steps behind with the mysterious boy next to you. It was awkward at first, asking him questions about his life, his interests, what was he studying for. It felt like you taking an interview from a celebrity, trying to figure out everything, absorbing as much informations as possible.

The sunrise found you in Times Square sitting next to a fountain getting deep about life in general. How much people can change if they really want to, how cruel world is and how you can find people that worth more that gold.

Your eyes couldn't focus anywhere but him. His mouth opening and closing, his nose scrunching whenever he was referring to his past-and you were dying to learn more-, his pale skin shining under the lights, his eyes glowing while talking about his goals, what he had achieved and what he hoped he would in the near future.

His mind was trying to process the fact that a stranger had already made him feel stuff. An excitement for this new girl that so unexpectedly entered his life. He bit his lower lip whilst you explained to him the reasons you moved so far away from your hometown to pursue your dreams. How passionate you seemed about that, how grateful you were for that decision of yours.

And when your hands accidentally touched. When you bit the inside of your mouth, your hand moving back towards your body, his fingers running through his golden hair, both nervous from the sudden touch. Electricity hitting all your nerves, your body tensed.

And the days passed. Overthinking everything over again and again. In the morning, while at class, at the lunch break, during homework, at night before sleeping just to wake up and re-think everything one more day. He was a distraction, in every person you passed you could see his face, hear his voice calling your name like he was just few steps away.

And when you would actually see him, your heart not being able to stop, your cheeks hurting from smiling for that long. The need of hold his hand just for one second, to bury yourself inside his arms and stay there smell him 'till you can't anymore, to feel his warmth embracing you becoming bigger and stronger.

Peter was dying knowing everytime that he won't hold you like he wished he could. He wouldn't feel your soft hair with the palm of his hand. He couldn't kiss your lips, taste your mouth, pull you close to his body.

It was getting really lonely. Nothing seemed like before, it was like colors didn't exist anymore, like every thing was dead. The food didn't have taste, friends were boring, classes seemed like a torture, the nights cold under the bedsheets. This town was not interesting if he wasn't with you. If you weren't with him.

That was when you became aware of the fact that you had started to fall in love with him. Really bad.

Fast forward three months later. You invited him over, one bottle of your favorite drink and the lights from the building around light the room you were sitting on. Your head resting on his shoulder, his arm wrapped around you keeping you close to him. You laughed at his jokes, listened to him talking about nothing really-not that you were paying attention, just enjoying his company more that ever and how only his voice could calm you. And he felt like the world was next to him, all the things he dreamed of were inside his arms. However he felt like he was far, far away from you, broken and hopeless.

There was a moment of silence.

Do it. Just do it.

"Y/n?"Peter whispered your name. You moved slightly your body hypnotized by him and searched for his eyes.

"Yeah?"

A deep breath was all it took for him."I think this is a good time to kiss you"

His eyes straight to yours. Your lips apart, surprised, excited, scared, happy, fearing that this was an hallucination, that you were starting to hear things.

You stood still at the same time the palm of his hand cupped your face, his action making the butterflies on your stomach dance around.

Take the risk.

You closed the gap between the two of you. Your lips connected with his. Your eyes closed shut, the feeling of him so close to you hard to get used to. Was this a dream? You didn't know but it happened.

He took the control and you just followed his moves, your heart skipping a beat when his other hand held your waist. It was better from what you had imagined. Way better. And you wanted to cry from happiness. All of your emotions getting exposed. You felt naked. Yet completed.

And that's how you fell in love. In New York city. With a stranger that was named Peter Parker. And his secrets waiting for you.

*this was written while listening to this playlist and just get sad and in love*

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0ETMalu3TCTHqkW4wXTtEx?si=VYljQ8VlTlKFGRlpXLmIng

#peter parker #peter parker imagine #peter parker au #tom holland #tom holland x #tom holland x y/n #tom holland imagines #tom holland fluff #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader #peter parker fluff #tom holland blurb #tomholland #tomhollandx #peter parker fanfiction

[ficsinhistory]

Big Chibi 6 :Theory and analysis because it was amazing and I need to scream about it ᕕ (ᐛ) ᕗ

Karmi is still out of town. But, apparently, she can walk alone and return to San Fransokyo and, assuming she never lived there, she may have just left SFIT. For all intents and purposes, she can visit everyone with prior authorization. At least, that's what I understood.

Karmi is an artist and a scientist. My theory that she could be a Shimamoto is still standing for me ... I can dream, okay? XD

Just give my daughter a last name!

Hardlight was perfect for the ep. Ian is the type of villain who would go on an autograph session being the big nerd he is. We have to remember that he took the chief of the police force hostage just because he wanted to play ... everything in the episode about him was in character.

The gang supporting Karmi's work. It's cute how they care.

Honey Lemon! She's the Karmiro fandom over there! And we have Andre again quoted.

Hiro's face when Karmi calls him for autograph session = Hiro.exe stop working.

The reasons the gang gives these nerds not to be together.

Aunt Cass ship it !! And I think it's hilarious that she asks if Karmi is his ex-girlfriend. Probably because since Hiro seems to be a person who would take his girlfriend all the time for coffee, she can only assume that she would be an ex.

Speaking of which, I like not only that Megan was quoted, but how she was quoted. Who asked about her was Cass and Baymax. That respectively who presented it and who made a heartbeat diagnosis, very smart. After all, she was there for half an entire season and what happened can't just be tossed under the rug.

And speaking of that, I don't think there is going to be a love triangle. Not with the new format of the episodes, the voice actress of Megan not being mentioned and after that specific episode. Hiro might have a certain attraction for Megan, but the boy is completely helpless for Karmi. (I love musicals for my own good)

Fred and Karmi. I think it's cute how excited Fred is, since he liked Karmi's work from the beginning and he can talk to her even if only a little.

Hiro freaking out when he saw a villain near Karmi, even though Hardlight had a non-aggressive attitude, after all Diane initially didn't have it either. And the last time this happened, she was turned into a monster and taken away. I don't blame him.

The fight of the chibs. And how Wasabi was the only one doing well! This breaks the stereotype of him being fearful! Very well, Disney! And bonus points for the lil Honey Lemon.

Karmi using the "someone has to help" move. Like, man the girl has a backbone! She went into battle with a villain who was not caught the last time, after her last encounter with one gave her the biggest trauma of her life. Tadashi would be proud.

I love how this episode shows that Karmi is not only a prodigy, but very smart. She bluffed about not knowing about Hardlight, used his technology against him after improving said technology with knowledge of robotics that she learned in a day with Hiro and basically hacked a super villain. Your favorite could never!

Speaking of which, let's just ignore the fact that before going to the autograph session, Karmi probably studied all the villains in the city and made ways to fight them? Like, the girl had a high-tech glove in her backpack! She expected an attack!

Hiro in love. That’s it. That’s the whole point.

Seriously, it's just really funny how the great hero of San Fransokyo gets a mess when it comes to romance. He is an intelligent and capable superhero… who is unable to flirt! He trying to be suave the highlight of this nerd's strangeness.

Hiro trusting Karmi in battle. She is capable, and he knows it. Karmi has escaped brainwashing and can fight. Imagine what she could do under full control of the mind and body? We don't need it, because we saw it in the ep.

Karmi being confident, extra ™ and done with Hardlight during the battle! She has been through a lot and she just doesn't get paid for it at that point.

 Hiro knew there was a helmet between him and Karmi at the end, right? Even if she wanted to kiss him, she wasn't going to give XD

He looking so disappointed that he couldn't kiss Karmi in the end. I laughed a lot. He wanted that kiss so bad!

Karmi being open and honest with "Captain Cutie" at the end. She changed her view, and it was really cool for her to talk about how she likes Hiro now, it wouldn't be right to kiss someone else. She respects Hiro, Captain Cutie and her own feelings. This is admirable.

Karmi kind of says what he feels without realizing it. This will generate an interesting dynamic. She is going to deal with Hiro as a friend because she has a crush and needs to know how to deal with it, while Hiro just knows everything and is not going to be able to do anything because he shouldn't know it and just… pining. Bless you, Disney!

Hiro's face at the end! This boy fall hard and fast! And the fact that he finds himself lucky that Karmi likes him, after finding her the worst for two seasons and just character development.

Now the theories and conclusions:

We know that Karmi will come back. Since things between her and Hiro have not yet been resolved and she doesn't know that Capitain Cutie and Hiro Hamada are the same people. Not to mention that she said things have been "a little crazy" since she left, so maybe we'll explore that later. Apart from what Baymax said in her debut ep, Karmi does not have a support system. Aka - Disney can you give me more about my daughter's past now, please ?!

Again, I don't think there's going to be a love triangle. As I said, Hiro could be attracted to Megan, but he is visibly and completely in love with Karmi and the questions about Megan during the episode, for me, it was so much to show that the writers have no selective memory and that they don't intend to ignore what happen, but move on; as for shows in the field of romance, the genius boy only has eyes for one person. I wanted to see Megan again, though. She is an amazing character and would totally ship these two. Not to mention that I want to see my two girls interact. Imagine the power of this!

As a writer myself, it was amazing to see how the signs of attraction were put into this episode. It was all there: touch, eye contact, Hiro trying to look suave(even though he had a milk mustache) and totally not looking forward to seeing her at the first opportunity he had in months and trying to impress, Karmi taking the initiative and calling him for the signing session and just not being able to hang up the call! Those two are going to be the end of me!

 Karmi seem to have more nerves with the crush she has on Hiro, unlike CC. Perhaps this is because it shows the difference, of how it is more real and less fantasy. After all, they were open rivals, they literally saw each other's worst, and as relationships are good and bad, they finally turned the page and can see each other's best now.

Karmi who took the initiative and Hiro is a ruddy mess, I knew it!

That episode was amazing, period!

#big hero 6 the series #big hero 6 #bh6 the series #big hero six the series #bh the series spoilers #karmiro #karmi #hiro hamada #fics review

[worryinglyinnocent]

Fic: Crooked Crooks and Awkward Angels

Summary: Gideon is performing in the school nativity play, and Belle and Rumpel are very excited to see his starring role. Obviously, there are a few mishaps along the way.

Written for the @a-monthly-rumbelling November non-smut prompt: anticipation, anger, angels.

Rated: G

Crooked Crooks and Awkward Angels

It was the eve of Storybrooke elementary school's nativity play, and as Belle approached the gates to pick up Gideon, she was halfway convinced that the traditional nativity had in fact been replaced with a re-enactment of Gladiator this year. The hall appeared to be in complete chaos, with half-costumed kids running hither and thither and back again. The large star over the stage was hanging precariously from a thread, and Belle was very glad it was made of cardboard and would not cause any injuries were it to fall on an unsuspecting pupil, teacher, or parent. 

Mary Margaret looked like she was ruing the day she decided to put the nativity on, and Belle had to sympathise. There was something about Christmas that brought out the worst in everyone, including children who one would have hoped would be on their best behaviour ready for Santa to come. It was clearly not going to be the case, and as she stepped into the hall to collect her son, she was dismayed to find him at the centre of one of the many disturbances. 

"Mama!" He rushed over as soon as he saw her, and Belle quickly saw that he was wearing an expression of utter, incandescent fury that only Rumpel could better.

"What's happened, Gid?"

He held up his crook, which was in two pieces. Although he had wanted to be one of the wise men with their bejewelled crowns and cloaks made out of old curtains trimmed with tinsel, or the starring role of Joseph the carpenter, he had been mollified at landing the role of Shepherd One when Rumpel had explained that way back when, he'd kept sheep himself, and there was no shame in it. After that, Gideon had thrown himself into his role, and had insisted on the stuffed sheep sitting at the dinner table with them of an evening. 

He was incredibly proud of his crook, which Rumpel had made for him by hand to the old specifications that he had used in his sheep-herding life. Naturally, Belle was disappointed to see that it had broken. 

"What happened? Was it an accident?"

"Well, Tommy said that it was an accident, but I saw him do it on purpose! He's jealous because I've got more lines than him."

"I'm sure that Papa will be able to fix it, don't worry."

"But the play is tomorrow!"

"He can fix it tonight."

Not entirely convinced of this, Gideon nonetheless followed her out of the hall. Belle decided not to mention the dirty look that he threw Tommy over his shoulder. Like his father, Gideon was quick to anger and had a fierce sense of justice, but it usually burned out within a few minutes, and sure enough, by the time they were at home and the crook had been spirited away out of sight and mind, he was back to his usual bright self. 

"How was the chaos?" Rumpel came out of the kitchen, wiping his hands on a dishcloth. Belle pulled the crook out of the hall closet and Rumpel sighed. 

"I'm not even going to ask, but fear not, it will be as good as new by the morning, and no magic will be required. Except the magic of superglue."

Belle laughed, leaning in to press a kiss against his cheek. It had become something of a running joke between them now, the whole magic thing. Rumpel had barely used it since Gideon had returned to them and they had begun their happy beginning together; there had simply been no need, and Belle had firmly stated that she did not want frivolous spells forming part of their son's upbringing. 

"Thank you, Rumpel. You're so good about these things."

"When it comes to children, I have infinite patience. Even for the ones who break my handiwork."

"It wasn't Gideon's fault. I'm not sure whether it was an accident, or deliberate sabotage as he claims, but apparently responsibility lies with Tommy, alias Shepherd Two."

"Ah, the classic shepherd's crook jealousy. It's a real thing among farming communities, you know."

He was so deadpan that Belle had to laugh, but then the moment was broken as something boiled over on the stove and Rumpel rushed back into the kitchen to rescue their dinner. 

The play was the only topic of conversation throughout the rest of the evening, and there was a definite air of anticipation. It was Gideon's first starring role, aside from the little performances he had put on for his parents over the course of his childhood. He was practically bouncing up and down in his seat with excitement, and Belle had to admit that she was feeling pretty excited about it herself. When she thought back to Gideon’s birth and all of the drama that had unfolded at the time, there had been a large part of her that had thought that she would never have the chance to see all of these childhood milestones of his, and now that she did have the opportunity and everything had worked out for the best, she was determined to make the most of it all. Having come so close to missing out on it, she knew that she was not going to miss out on it now.

After dinner, Gideon was happily playing with his stuffed sheep and practicing his lines – Belle had told him not to put his costume back on for fear of something happening to it without enough time for it to be washed – and cries of ‘Look, what’s that up in the sky?’ and ‘We must take our sheep to Bethlehem!’ were ringing out from the living room as Rumpel carefully fixed the crook with superglue and packing tape. It wasn’t exactly as good as new, but the join was carefully hidden, and it would hopefully hold up until after the performance. Belle wondered if he’d ever had to fix his own crook like this, and what he had done in the absence of superglue.

Rumpel let out a sigh as he put down his handiwork, and Belle caught the sound.

“Is everything all right?”

He nodded, running his hands over the crook. “It just reminds me of a very long time ago, that’s all. Sometimes I do wonder what would have happened if I had never taken on the Dark One powers, and I had just lived out my life as a spinner with Bae.”

“And what would have happened, do you think?”

“Well, life would have been a lot shorter, and a lot simpler. But at the same time, I would never have met you and we would never have had Gideon, so I could never regret the path that I chose that led me to this moment.”

Belle smiled and leaned in to kiss her husband, just at the moment when Gideon raced into the kitchen to see if the crook was repaired. He scrunched his face up at the sight of them kissing and immediately ran out again, much to Belle’s mirth.

“It’s probably for the best,” Rumpel said, eyeing the open doorway. “If he’d seen that the crook was mended he’d probably want to start acting with it straight away and I don’t think it’s ready for his exuberance just yet.”

Belle just laughed and kissed him again. She couldn’t wait for the next day when the crook would be seen in all its glory.

X

The day of the play dawned bright and early – well, it was early, certainly, but given the time of year it was not at all bright when Gideon woke them before seven, fumbling and thumping around in his room as he got his costume on ready, despite the play not being until two in the afternoon. He insisted on remaining in the classic combination of bathrobe and tea-towel until it was time to go to school, and even then, Belle had a trying time getting him into his normal clothes. She kept busy all morning, trying to put off her anticipation with practical matters. Surely, the kitchen had never been cleaner.

Finally, it was time to go, and Belle made her way to the school via the pawn shop. She slipped her arm through Rumpel’s as they walked, and he leaned into her side.

“Ready for Gideon’s grand debut?” he asked.

Belle nodded. “I know that he always says he wants to be a sorcerer like you when he grows up, but I think that this experience might have made him rethink. He’s certainly very happy treading the boards.”

The hall was almost full to overflowing with parents and other family members by the time they got there, even though they were early, and Belle could only giggle as little faces kept peering out from behind the curtains, searching for people they knew in the audience and waving excitedly before Mary Margaret pulled them back. At last, the lights dimmed, and the spotlight went up on stage as a young girl in an angel costume with cardboard wings shuffled into view.

“Welcome to our…” She looked out at the audience, then back at the curtain. “Welcome to our… Harvest Festival!”

“Nativity Play!” Mary Margaret hissed from behind the curtain, but it was too late, the little angel had already tripped off the stage, and the first scene was set.

Gideon was in the third scene, and he took his role very seriously, never once looking for his parents in the audience and focussing on his two lines. Belle was pleased to see that the crook was still in one piece after its repair job, and it made her smile to imagine Gideon guarding it all morning. She knew that every parent would think that their child was the star of the show and all of the other kids paled into insignificance, but she didn’t care; she was so proud of her son and she thought that his performance was a triumph. After the final bows had been made and the curtain pulled up so that the children could go down to meet their parents in the audience, Gideon bounded up to them.

“What did you think?” he asked. “Was I good?”

“You were wonderful,” Rumpel said. “You looked every inch a shepherd after my own heart.”

Gideon beamed. “Miss Blanchard says we’re going to do another play in summer,” he said. Personally, Belle thought that Mary Margaret might be having second thoughts about that announcement now, but she didn’t voice that to Gideon. “I hope I get a part. I really like being an actor.” He paused. “Maybe I could be on TV one day!”

“If that’s what you want, Gideon, then I’m sure you’ll find a way to get there.”

The three of them made their way home hand in hand, Gideon chattering on nineteen to the dozen about all of the backstage antics that had happened before the play had started – it was a miracle that the thing had gone off without a hitch considering all the mishaps that seemed to have gone on – and Belle just exchanged a look with Rumpel over the top of Gideon’s head. It was one of those moments that would stick with her forever. It was nothing momentous or life-changing, just another little milestone in Gideon’s childhood, but something for which she was grateful, nevertheless.

Hopefully, there would be many more moments like this to come.

#rumbelle fic #rumbelle #A Monthly Rumbelling #Belle French #Rumpelstiltskin #Gideon Gold #fluff family #family fluff #Fic: Crooked Crooks and Awkward Angels

[bartholomewmacmillan]

You'll need a boutonniere. Actress Kathryn Harrold is 66.

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[moonlightwinterdxxix]

MOONLIGHTWINTERDXXIX! Ready for another request attack!? 🤣 I'm here for Sutabaa Zaimoku identity shenanigans the SEQUEL! 😎✨ Somehow Kara's weird nice guy habits had actually worked?! He got on the good side of a visiting Sutabaa's overseas higher up by sheer luck and when they arrive to Sutabaa for whataver they mistaken Totty as Kara. Will Totty abuse this chance for nepotism to rise from his janitor position? Or will customer Kara unexpectedly arrive in all his glory and threaten this ruse?!

@yisongye For #make Karamatsu smile—the Bullied boys now have time to shine outside TVV xD

For those who are new, this is the continuation of this fic here.

~~~

Leaving its slanted position from the angle it was creating from the floor, Todomatsu raised the mop vertically and glared. “Stop laughing.”

“Pfft...! Okay, first you told me to stop talking,” Atsushi confirmed through snorts, shoulders rocking, “now you want me to stop laughing. What do you want me to actually do, Todomatsu? Make up your mind.”

“Leave. Go home. I don’t want you in here anymore. You’re making it a billion times worse.”

“Alright, come on. This is the thing, Todomatsu,” Atsushi said, resting his elbows on the table and raising a smug eyebrow that made Todomatsu want to punch his face so badly. “It wouldn’t have been so bad if you were being casual. Just a casual joe that’s cleaning tables, mopping the floors, doing his job, basically. But wearing your brother’s tacky sunglasses while working is what made you a sight more painful than him himself.”

“It’s his fault this all happened!” Todomatsu exclaimed, spreading a hand. “You have absolutely no idea what he said to the manager, and if you did...! If you were in my shoes, you’ll live with embarrassment for the rest of your life! He told me everything! I didn’t even want to wake up the next day after what he told me!”

“You’re overreacting,” Atsushi said, taking a sip from his latte. “I’m sure it wasn’t so bad. If he was pretending to be you, he couldn’t have possibly broken character enough that he’d make you look like a painful—”

“Then the sun, that glorious sun! Oh, it was the rose’s guardian angel, sending it a spirit for life and the will to fight forward! Oh, and it would now attract all the butterflies that followed a path so similar to it’s!” Todomatsu mimicked, posing with Karamatsu’s flair and voicing the lines with the lowest his voice can drop. Dramatically.

Atsushi burst out laughing.

“H-Hey! Shut up!”

“You’re right! It’s embarrassing!” Atsushi guffawed.

“Oh, wait until then!” Todomatsu snapped, resuming his work as he cleanly ridded the spot where a baby had spilt its mother’s drink. “The time will come when the same humiliation will happen to you. Don’t think that just because you have money and riches your life will be all fine and dandy. I promise that you will find failure soon. Just you wait.”

“Ooh, scary,” Atsushi drawled. “Doesn’t help that you’re wearing his glasses though. Why are you even doing that? To hide your identity? Everyone in the Ward knows of that face belonging to a sextuplet NEET, Todomatsu. That does nothing to your case.”

“Better safe than sorry. It’s better than having my own identity out in the world. Have Karamatsu instead—he’s the one most associated with failure.” He blew a raspberry, rolling his eyes. “You’ll eat your words soon, dumbbell,” Todomatsu vowed, grabbing a water bottle from his belt and spraying the floor. “I swear to Cod, you’ll eat your words and—”

“Todomatsu Matsuno?”

Someone suddenly was in front of the employees’ door of the establishment against the wall, and both Todomatsu and Atsushi were stunned to find a beautiful girl standing there, her eyes shining like those of the universe, all planets aligned and the sun at its brightest.

She had long, wavy brown hair that touched all the way to her waist, a bangs that brushed her eyebrows before parting at the sides, overlapping her ears. She had a large bust, which grabbed their eyes, but she also had long legs that they could see through her khaki pants. A notepad peeped out of the apron of her Sutabaa work uniform.

“Todomatsu Matsuno?” the girl echoed, smiling faintly, almost relieved. “Was that you? Oh, I never thought I’d actually see you! I heard snippets of your interview the other day, and I didn’t think I would be able to see you again. Anyway, I think I need to introduce myself formally to you. My name’s Sen. And I’m gonna be a co-worker of yours for the entire month.”

Todomatsu did nothing else but look at her, cheeks reddening as the sunglasses went askew on his nose.

“I’m the Sutabaa manager from Paris, see? But still a Japanese native,” the girl—Sen, went on. “I recently decided to take a trip back to Japan so I can see how the employees do their tasks here. And I was just in time too. A made a recent notice of the lack of appeal in customer service and entertainment, but I can associate the opposite of that with the fanfaronade you put on. At least, what I just heard right now and the other day. I assume that really was your interview, wasn’t it?”

“Y...Yeah,” Todomatsu breathed.

“Great! Because I think I might be considering lifting your position off being a janitor if that was the case,” Sen told them, taking out her notepad and pen. Her fingernails were decorated with fancied stickers of the Eiffel Tower. “With your flow of words, we might be able to attract more customers to the establishment. Imagine being talked about as that cashier man with a Shakespearean dictionary in his vocabulary. Wouldn’t that spark interest?”

No. Yes? Perhaps? Todomatsu didn’t think a Karamatsu persona would’ve sparked any interest from anyone or anything? Not even an ant’s or a cockroach’s.

And yet...If this meant not being a janitor anymore...

“Of course, only if you don’t mind,” Sen said, jutting down on her notebook. “If you aren’t willing to act so in front of customers, we won’t force you too. But your gentlemanly manner when you speak might make some progress in this building when it comes to getting people to come. It’s a suggestion I’ve already spoken to your main manager about. Now I want to ask you! Are you willing to do it, Todomatsu-san?”

“E-Eh?!” Atsushi squeaked, and Todomatsu continued to stare at her.

Then he blinked beneath the sunglasses. Then his lungs refilled with air, and his imagination lit up with his proud-to-behold Todomatsu Matsuno wisdom. He smirked, transferred the mop to his other hand, using his free one to touch his hairline with two fingers. “Of course, my dear! And I’d be happy to perform more Shakespearean might you give me the opportunity to! After all, I am Todomatsu Matsuno, master of the fine art, a man of theatre through-and-through!”

“Oh!” Sen expressed (cutely to the mens’ eyes), eyebrows rising.

“EEEHHH?!! O-Oi! Todomatsu! What the hell are you doing?!” Atsushi demanded, rising slightly from his chair.

Dropping the mop, Todomatsu slid over to Sen, a finger-gun following the shape of his jaw as he grinned narcissistically. “My, what ever is the problem, Atsushi? Can you not see that I’m being as normal as I can be? I am flattered by this woman’s suggestion, and all I want is to make her feel welcome in these crowded, sorrowful Tokyo streets. You are quite a foreigner yourself, in a way, are you not, sweetheart?” He knelt down, grabbed her hand. “I apologize for the inconvenience, dear. You make my heart melt.” He kissed her hand—it was so soft. Like, so, so soft that it was impossible for something to be that soft.

She chuckled.

Atsushi sputtered.

And Todomatsu wanted to as well. Because he wanted to scream so badly and yank his soul out of his body for the stupid idea he had concocted. Because...Because...BECAUSE LOOK AT THIS! He was posing with that stupid grin of his stupid brother while wearing those stupid glasses and was talking in that stupid accent all because Karamatsu had ruined Todomatsu’s chances for work with a stupid mistake because of his stupid brain and—!

Okay, keep it together, Todomatsu. Look on the bright side. He was a janitor, he was cursed with this hex of Satan since the day Karamatsu left the womb. And this was unacceptable, more than being a baby brother that everyone looked down on! This woman...She could change that. Hell, she could turn him from a lowlife into the manager himself! If Todomatsu followed her guidelines, matched her standards, made himself the appealing man she wanted to view...Yes, this was going to be his debut as the boss of his own life!

And so what if Karamatsu was the key to that?! Karamatsu was the key to success, and no one cared for Karamatsu’s own failure! These NEETs were selfish bastards after all!

Heck, Todomatsu was that desperate! Yes! Yes! But he didn’t care, for everyday he was already dying with the thirst for change! Change in his life, change in his pathetic, why-am-I-alive existence! He had no friends—only acquaintances who would never stay longer than twenty minutes! His life was littered with five matching levels of garbage, sharing his bed and face that made him look as terrible as them! But he wasn’t! And he wasn’t going to be defined like that any freaking more!

Yes! Hell yes! This was the true form of this Todomatsu-sama, the one who will be the first of his NEETy brothers to find love alongside work! So what if he was a cursed janitor?! He was an official graduate from the status that had once colored him at the bottom of the caste system, and this woman was going to be his diploma! Hell yes, he won!

And there was even a plus. This girl was into this, and if he continued this painful persona he might have a chance to actually keep her. No more virginity for this youngest dirty monster, because he was going to be able to smash her and make her his by acting his part as the best boyfriend she could ask for! So what if she was a princess?! A lady of romance and theatrics and the arts?! She was still an unattainable woman who any of these stupid NEETs would pine for for ages! Lifetimes! A keeper to the max despite maybe bad taste in vocabulary, but that was besides the point!

Todomatsu could keep her. Hell, he can keep her. If he was this perfect cashier, he can keep her. Beat the hell out of his brothers, and become the true role model that Choromatsu and Osomatsu were far from being! All because he was a loser, therefore there was no one else he could grab! Because Iyayo and Chibimi were plastic dolls and Kinko was a woman of true culture...Because Totoko hated them like scum and Homura was in love with someone else...!

Hell yeah, there was so much he could gain, this baby demon of the Matsuno hellhole...All he needed to do now was act the part. Act the part.

What would Karamatsu say, and how can it be said for this woman’s attraction? Hm, he needed to summon his inner Karamatsu, if there even was one. Because just like the rest of his brothers, having an inner Karamatsu was like saying that they had a tree growing over their heads. It was impossible. Because having an inner Karamatsu was one of the things they as NEETs did not want to have.

But this woman. She wanted a Karamatsu.

Todomatsu smirked. Fine. For her, he’ll play the part.

“Have you always been a theatrical one, Todomatsu-san?” Sen asked, tucking a few collective strands of hair behind her ear after hiding her notebook and pen again. “Or is this a new thing after graduating?”

Hmm, how was he going to answer this? Should he be honest and tell her that the only thing he’s ever done involving theatre was dunk bird turd on someone’s script, or should he go with the Karamatsu flow and tell her that acting has always been a hobby since the day he could walk? What would this woman want to hear? Todomatsu pondered, forced his brain cells to click and tick and turn their gears...Hmm...

Then—

Todomatsu posed, raising an arm and bending another. “I had no plan!” he announced.

Sen’s mouth formed a tiny circle. Atsushi face-palmed.

“Heh, I’ve always went with the flow of my own wind, dear beautiful Sen,” Todomatsu enumerated smoothly, dropping the octaves of his voice, which wasn’t so hard. He was already gifted to have a deep voice whenever he yelled (something Choromatsu once mentioned to him, that rising, fapping loser), and so mimicking Karamatsu’s original tone wasn’t that difficult as an activity. That, and this woman had never met Karamatsu in person, so he had the safety of a thousand nets and trampolines to catch his sky-high fall.

“Theatrical arts, drama, cherry blossoms in the wind, a heart of blue.” Oh god, Todomatsu wanted to slap himself so hard, wanted to slice his tongue with a cleaver and haul it into the mouth of hell. Speaking Karamatsu was speaking the language of agony. If this was what being the childhood best friend of Karamatsu resulted in, then maybe it was better if none of that ever happened at all. “It was my mind, cured with the peacefulness of my being, that opened my existence in a fantasy worth exploring. The unknown. Skies and trees that breathe the air of purity that is being wiped from this earth. It tears my soul and rips my being into shreds.”

Atsushi snorted, turning away. That goon, Todomatsu was gonna deal with him later.

“Ooh, how poetic,” Sen commented, her hair bouncing as she tilted her head. “How did you gather your vocabulary?”

How did Karamatsu gather his vocabulary? How did Karamatsu gather his vocabulary? HOW DID KARAMATSU GATHER HIS VOCABULARY? When they were freaking kids, Karamatsu wasn’t even able to determine the differences between ‘limbs’ and ‘limbo’! How the hell did he come from that turd of an idiot into a man with a dictionary built into his throat?!

“Heh, by being myself,” Todomatsu answered painfully, trying not to reach over to wipe the sweat pooling behind his ears and running down his nape. “I’m a natural at my strengths, the best of my kind. Because I’m a loner, but at the same time I have my own hands to support me might I fall. Heh, I’m a tower of storms.”

“You definitely are. Very destructive too,” Atsushi chortled, eyes directed elsewhere but the killer’s promise of a glare on Todomatsu’s face.

“Wait a minute,” Sen said, a finger touching those beautiful lips of hers. “Todomatsu-san, have I seen you before? I thought you looked familiar and remembered that I saw someone looking like you yesterday. Were you at the park yesterday taking a swim in the river dressed in a yellow baseball uniform?”

Todomatsu flinched so hard that his soul felt like it had just poked the waves of an ocean made of lava. “No, that wasn’t me! It was a stranger, surely! I hate baseball, always have!”

“Only since today,” Atsushi muttered. Todomatsu was internally sending him two of his middle fingers which tips had holes for bullets.

“But the other day, I thought I saw you too?” Sen asked. “Wearing red this time. Playing at Pachinko? And you had a very large bruise on your face while you left the parlor crying. I assume you lost the gamble after getting into a fight?”

Shit! Damn you, Osomatsu! “Nope! Pachinko is not my turf in the slightest!” Todomatsu lied, puffing out his chest because he felt like deflating into an airless blob of rubber.

“Yet you won yesterday,” Atsushi stated quietly behind his hand.

“And also, in the mixer? I saw someone in pink looking like you leave it recently,” Sen followed up, crossing her arms. “Well, not to defy you or anything, but are you the mixer type really, Todomatsu-san? With your flair and all, your humble personality, I don’t think you need a mixer to determine your acquaintances and your friends.”

“Heh, fret not, my queen,” Todomatsu schmoozed, wanting to stab himself for each ‘heh’ he had to gag out. “This man here is still as packed with friends as a man can be.” Which was half true and half lie. Todomatsu was one with peers, but Karamatsu was a member of the trash gang. Meaning, friends were flies, and peers were the dirty streets that only cats were willing to walk because they too were stupid enough not to understand anything in life.

Sorry not sorry, Ichimatsu.

“Oh, alright then,” Sen said, then bowed. “I guess I was just thinking about your successful interview too much then.”

“Oh, it is quite fine,” Todomatsu fibbed, planting very sweaty hands against his hips. “I am alone in my features—there’s no one else like me at all. If there was, it’s probably a doppelgänger signaling death that looms over me. Therefore I am the one and only, Sen-chan. Todomatsu Matsuno.”

Atsushi turned away, shoulders shaking.

Sen chuckled. “If you say so, mister Matsuno. So, are you up for it, Todomatsu-san? Would you accept my invitation to be a cashier instead of a janitor?”

“Yes, my sweet! I am glad to oblige!” Todomatsu hollered, spreading out his arms. “I shall prepare myself for all the hi’s and hello’s I can offer to any passersby for this fine establishment! Give the word and I shall motion with the swift energy of lightning!” Smirking painfully, he posed, spreading his legs out, resting one of his elbows over his other hand, and he flicked his bangs before sending Sen a finger gun. “Like lightning. Bang.” He inched his fingertip.

Atsushi exploded into full-on laughter.

“Alright then,” Sen said, nervously cutting Atsushi a look as she slowly retreated into the staff room. “I’ll let them know, so wait here. Let me make the arrangements for you, alright?”

“Heh. You are the true Samaritan, dearest Sen,” Todomatsu gritted out with the flawless character of his brother.

Then waving, Sen closed the door behind her.

Todomatsu snapped.

“What the hell is wrong with you, you turd-hole?!” he yelled, gripping Atsushi’s dark collar and shaking him with the mercy of a madman. “Stop making me look as transparent as I already am! It’s bad enough that I need to be that stupid-as-hell brother in order to win back my pride, moron! And don’t question how I can impersonate the goon, and I too want to straight-up murder my past self for ever thinking that being friends with that painful Shittymatsu was a good idea! So shut the hell up!”

“Yo, Totty!” Atsushi called out, still smiling through the force shoving him back and forth. “Why didn’t you just tell her no? You don’t have to put up a Karamatsu everyday if you don’t want to! Be a janitor in freedom! It’s still worth it!”

“And let myself still look like an effing NEET in the process?! Not a chance!” Todomatsu fumed, releasing Atsushi and pouting, folding his arms. “You won’t understand. You have everything already. Why not just be a comrade and let me have this? I know it sucks and it hurts and it’s painful as fu—!” Pausing, he doubled over, and he vomited a waterfall of glitters onto the floor. The Karamatsu was really getting into him.

“I’m not telling you anything,” Atsushi said, shrugging casually as Todomatsu straightened up again, wiping his lips. “If you want to or not, it’s your choice. You’re the only one balancing on your own lifeline. Each choice you make affects you, and there’s no one else that can do anything about it.”

“Meh, I guess that’s true.” Finally, Todomatsu had the urge to pull Karamatsu’s sunglasses off his face to look at. Just the blue of them reflecting the light from the restaurant made him want to snap them and toss them out into the Bermuda Triangle. “Still though. If it makes me get more than what I already have, Imma be up for the challenge. Time to be Karamatsu-niisan.” He returned the shades. “I dunno how long I can pull this off—if I do at all.”

Atsushi snorted. “Wish you luck. How long you can keep this up will color me curious as well.”

~~~

One week. It was one entire week of painful dialogue and flamboyant posing. It was one week with Todomatsu being responsible for those awful sunglasses that Karamatsu had been looking for whenever they came back home after days under Akatsuka Ward’s sun. It was one week of heh’s and hm’s, and each time Todomatsu wanted to throw a fit and dump on a table the same way Ichimatsu would. He was angry, he was embarrassed, he just wanted to end his suffering with a knife to the chest or whatever lame shtick.

“You’re doing great, Todomatsu-san,” Sen would tell him, and it was kind of true. Customers did seem very satisfied with Karamatsu’s dialogue floating to their ears, and it made Todomatsu question humanity in its intelligence. It was either he was dumb or the world was dumb, and he voted for the latter due to his excessive pride. That, and he needed reassurance of something, because working as a cashier mimicking his older brother didn’t deduce the NEETiness he felt like was still sewn into his system.

He didn’t answer any questions from anyone else though. If it were Aida and Sachiko that were close by in their shifts, Todomatsu would be able to cut away the sheets of Karamatsu’s ghost long enough for him to be normal, the same Todomatsu ‘Totty’ Matsuno that the two baristas knew. As for his brothers, he was always mopey when taking orders from them if they ever came, and they always left Sutabaa with knowledge only on the purchased drink rather than the persona that broke loose with other customers. Todomatsu was glad of the stupidity of Jyushimatsu and the lack of comment from Ichimatsu.

And then...The day came.

“One strawberry latte for Nishimiya,” Sen announced, scribbling the name on a large cup with a black marker.

“Heh. Blueberry cheesecake for Shimizu,” Todomatsu added, wanting to let a large portion of glittery vomit escape his throat again. “Kindly help yourselves to table four, my dear. You wait there for the meantime—your hunger will be satisfied momentarily.” He lowered his sunglasses, winking. And when the customer smiled at him in appreciation, it was obvious she didn’t notice how much pressure Todomatsu had to put into his muscles just to make himself appear his way.

“Right, Totty, right?” Sen left the table, handing the cup to him. “I’ll be on my break now. Can I leave it to you?”

“Heh. If that may assist thy fatigue, I’d be willing to move mountains for you.” Shoot, shoot, SHOOT! Just kill him already, Akatsuka-sensei so he didn’t have to do this bullhooey anymore! But this ‘bullhooey’ seemed to deem him fine for now as Sen bobbed her head, entering himself into the opposite room as she closed her door.

The bell above the Sutabaa entrance chimed.

A sigh.

Time stopped for Todomatsu, and for a moment there was nothing he could do but transform into a frozen block of ice. But his recovery was swift, and before notice Todomatsu took off his sunglasses as a pair of leather-sleeved elbows propped themselves on the counter.

“Good morning, Todomatsu,” Karamatsu said, smiling sadly at his brother. Sadly? Why sadly? Shoot, that meant he was going to blow up into painful monologuing territory that will be sure to either end his life, or Todomatsu’s. Bullsh—“I’d just want a coffee, please. Extra sugar, maybe?” Karamatsu went on, devoid of joy.

Todomatsu gulped. “Ah, right. Wh...Why are you here, Karamatsu-niisan?” His gaze darted through the area, hoping for no familiar faces to question him and his conversation with his lookalike brother. Thank goodness the timing had Sen leaving for a while before anything else bad could happen, because Todomatsu swore to Cod, bad stuff was indeed going to happen.

“Need a little time to think, perhaps?” Karamatsu said, lowering his own blue sunglasses. It was a fun thought, Todomatsu imagined, to continuously rid Karamatsu of any of his glasses by breaking them in half or tossing them into a gorge, but a spare would always find themselves on his face the following day. Wonder how many he had tucked in their closet? His entire allowance, most likely. No wonder he has only his 10% chances of winning in pachinko.

Karamatsu continued, “Because there was this very beautiful woman, and for a while I might’ve called her mine, but...” He gripped his elbows with opposite hands, fingers sinking into his sleeves, “she rejected my confession,” he squeezed out.

Todomatsu remained unfazed. Alright. So? Todomatsu didn’t give a dang about Karamatsu’s tragic love story. “So you thought that coming here to mope would be a good idea? Why not just follow Osomatsu-niisan in Pachinko or go fishing with Choromatsu-niisan?”

“Heh. They had their own activities planned for this lonely afternoon,” Karamatsu told him, and Todomatsu felt the horror of old English penetrating through him. “And is it wrong that I wanted to spend time with my dear littlest brother? I missed days where we trekked the world solo. I guessed that maybe time with him again would lift my soul from the pits in where it has fallen into. Crammed with skeletons...O-Oh, Totty! My heart is weeping, my brother!” He extended his arms and tightened them around Todomatsu, pulling the younger man towards him before sobbing on his shoulder.

Todomatsu went rigid, praying to everyone in the skies listening not to have anyone barge in during this absolutely humiliating moment of Todomatsu’s probable fall from grace.

“And she was a delicate flower too!” Karamatsu wept, clinging to Todomatsu with all his might. Cod, the counter edge was digging into Todomatsu’s stomach...! “Beautiful and compassionate and oh! Such an ideal diamond, brother! And yet I was not anything to her!” He wailed, breathing jagged as he mashed his face onto Todomatsu’s collar, letting it absorb his misery.

“Ugh! Keep it down, Shittymatsu!” Todomatsu hissed, prepping his hands over Karamatsu’s chest in preparation to push him away. “I’m at work, for crying out loud! And what kind of idiot customer walks up to the cashier to cry? Are you that stupid?”

Thankfully preserving the need for Todomatsu to do the deed himself, Karamatsu released his younger brother, leveling Todomatsu’s gaze with confusion setting as the emotion in his tear-filled eyes. “Umm...Cashier? I thought you were a janitor?”

Oh, Cod-damn it. Todomatsu cringed. Karamatsu didn’t know yet, couldn’t know, will never ever know...! If he knew who knew what kind of shtick Todomatsu will have to put up with and what kind of life he will forever be living with regret and—!

The staff room door opened. “Totty! I think I forgot my wallet here and—” Sen paused, staring at the brothers before flinching. “Oh! Sorry! I didn’t think there was a customer! Please, carry on, sir! You...!” Her eyebrows furrowed as she trailed off, gears clicking in her head. “...look exactly like Totty. Are you brothers? And he’s got a leather jacket and...Huh?”

Karamatsu blinked, thick brows curved questioningly. “Yes, I’m his brother. And are you...? Totty, are you alright, my dear brother?”

Holy crap! Cod, crap-crap-crap! Todomatsu felt his blood run dry. “Ah, yeah! Karamatsu! Sen-chan! I, um, heh!” He suddenly grabbed Karamatsu’s wrist and dragged him off, not waiting for anything else as he led Karamatsu out the Sutabaa door and outside the building to its side. Behind a wall, where no one sale might see them. Might. Because no one important was going to need glancing at a pair of brothers that looked closest to being members of slavery in the caste system.

Which they were, mind you. But not Todomatsu, if Karamatsu decided not to screw things up.

“Huh? Todomatsu, what’s going on?” Karamatsu asked as Todomatsu parted his grip on Karamatsu, massaging his temper and tingling veins for tranquility that didn’t want to come.

“Look. I can explain some other time, but for now, just effing follow my lead, got it, niisan?” Todomatsu ordered lowly, cautious for stares. Sen, the manager, Aida, Sachiko, or any of their foolish brothers. “I am the cool one, you’re the same loser as you always were. Picture yourself when you were eighteen, or just think about your heartbreak. You’re a goner from life. And you have no idea how to speak with your normal, flashy speech patterns.”

Karamatsu was nothing but confused. “Eh?”

Scoffing irritably, Todomatsu snatched the glasses from Karamatsu’s face and put them on himself, then proceeded to take off Karamatsu’s leather jacket from his brother’s body. That stupid shirt had the painful man’s face on it...! Alright, he can find a way around that. All he needed to do was be creative. Karamatsu was already an actor of some sort, so there was no need to...! Bah! Freaking heck with it! Making up stories was never difficult when you grew up as a liar!

Todomatsu flipped the leather jacket over his own shoulders and lifted his chin at Karamatsu.

“Todomatsu?” Sen called out. “Are you two over here?”

Just in time. Todomatsu elbowed Karamatsu’s gut, and after a grunt from him, Todomatsu said, “Follow. My. Lead. Or I’m going to burn all of your clothes before you even blink again.”

“Eh? Uh, ‘kay,” Karamatsu hesitantly agreed.

“Totty? Ah, there you two are.” Sen made herself visible as she stepped out of the corner turn. And being able to now see them openly, she stopped walking, for good reason. “Um, is this a bad time?”

“No, not at all,” Todomatsu said, speaking with an impression of his brother as he tried to wave a hand with dismissal. Cod, he could already smell the cologne. “It’s my brother here. It’s not much, but I find it quite unruly of him to root through my clothing without my permission. I’m just trying to set him straight for it again. Apologies, Sen-chan.”

“Eh?!” Karamatsu half-gasped, only faltering when he saw the stiletto aimed at him in Todomatsu’s glare. “Ah, yeah, sorry about that,” he said lightly, timidly. “I was, uh...Going through a phase? I wanted to be, uh, like him.” He pointed at Todomatsu limitedly. Todomatsu jerked his head slightly. Doing great, you lame actor. Karamatsu-niisan.

“Ah, I don’t think I should be here then,” Sen amended, backing away from them with a light flush and an apologetic smile. “If this is something personal, the last thing I want to do is walk in on your talk.”

“Heh, we’re fine, my dear. Kindly decrease your pressure on our situation,” Todomatsu soothed in a baritone, Karamatsu’s jaw lowering beside him as his eyes dilated. “We will report back to the main cafe shortly. My brother here, must only receive a brief scolding. We will be fine, such as we always can be. Right, my dear brother Karamatsu?”

Karamatsu sniffed, taking his palms to the corners of his eyes. “Cod, you’ve adapted so much...!” he sniveled proudly, and defeatedly, to Sen’s ears. “I’m so proud of you, Totty!”

Todomatsu felt a vein bob under his skin. When they were alone, he was going to kill this man.

But for the meantime, he said, “Oh, do not weep, brother! Forgiveness is always a virtue in our bloodline! I will not hold your prejudices against you! Instead, come into my arms as I will blanket you with comfort that will leave you spellbound in my affection!” And as much as he didn’t want to do it, Todomatsu spread out his arms, which were immediately touching not the air anymore but Karamatsu as he threw himself against Todomatsu’s chest.

“You sound like me! I’m so happy!” Karamatsu cried, though gratefully softly enough for Sen not to hear.

“Can it, niisan,” Todomatsu hissed in reply. “If you mess up the act none of us will be able to walk this earth again without regret dragging our ankles. Just continue being this emotional and we’ll be fine. Make me look cool here.”

“Okay, brother. I...Wait...If you’re acting like me and telling me to make you look cool...” Karamatsu hiccuped. “Does that mean you think I’m cool?” he sobbed out desperately.

Todomatsu choked, his entire body warming as his face fell red. “N-No! You’re not cool! There’s a reason for all of this and I—!”

“I’ll just leave now,” Sen said, wagging her hand as her shoes planted themselves on the ground behind her. “You two sort yourselves out. I’ll be glad to cover you for a bit, Totty, if you need time to settle things out.”

“Your heart truly was mantled from Hephaestus’s golden chamber,” Todomatsu rasped, his body and mind matted with sequins on wounds.

Karamatsu buried his head in deeper, squeezing Todomatsu tighter as Sen dipped her head and vanished from sight. Only then did Todomatsu grind his teeth together and shove Karamatsu off him, making the older man stumble back and catch himself by a pillar, blinking wetly at Todomatsu.

“Okay, enough,” Todomatsu said tersely, eyelids weighing down unamused as his arms interlaced parallel to his torso. “Karamatsu-niisan, can you please not tell anyone of this, ever? I’m gonna tell you everything, but swear to me that all this is to be kept between us. If anything comes out, your head will be what our brothers will see at the dinner table later tonight.”

“Of course! If there’s a secret, I promise of sealed lips that I would take with me to my tombstone!” Karamatsu vowed, a fist connecting to his left breast. “Reveal all you need to, my brother! I await your words.”

“Cod, that’s so painful,” Todomatsu wheezed, then cleared his throat afterwards, lowering the sunglasses for solid eye contact. “I was given the chance to become a cashier because they thought I was you. Or at least, you were me, but I think you might have an idea. They really liked your speaking patterns from the interview, and wanted that to be the first thing that customers heard when entering Sutabaa. So assuming I was you, and wanting to rise from a crappy janitor, I pretended to be you so that I can achieve that higher position. It’s my rise in the caste system, honestly. It’s all I ever wanted.”

“T...Totty...” Karamatsu breathed.

“Iya-ya, it’s not much,” Todomatsu promised, gesturing for emphasis. “But I thought it was the only shot I got. I understood you enough that it wasn’t really hard to be like you, so that was the least of my problems. But of course, it was painful as hell, since the entire week had me trying to be someone I’m not. I guess I...I...” Then the realization, for the first time, hit him, and he wrinkled the leather jacket in his hands, smacked it to the ground, and turned to walk away.

But then there was a hand clamping around his wrist, and Karamatsu had stopped Todomatsu from going any further with his promising hold. “Oi. You aren’t going without finishing that sentence, Todomatsu,” he said sternly.

“They like you more than me,” Todomatsu spat out brokenly.

Karamatsu’s reply was his muteness.

“Think about it, niisan. If it were just you trying to be me before, it would’ve landed me as nothing but a plain old janitor if nothing at all,” Todomatsu blabbered, a finger pushing up the shades as he averted his gaze to his feet. “But when you broke into you, I got the chance of being a cashier again. And now the only reason I’m keeping the job is because I’ve been trying to be you. If I were being me, what would I even be contributing to society? Nothing. Maybe that’s why I lost the job in the first place.”

Karamatsu was still holding him firmly.

“Never mind. I’m babbling nonsense you won’t understand. Sorry, Karamatsu-niisan.” Todomatsu used his free hand to rescue his eyes from the blue lenses that were casting his surroundings in aqua. Then he took Karamatsu’s other hand and pressed their surface on them, securing his fake identity with its true owner once again. “I’ll just return to work now. Pretend that you finally won over me so that they don’t ask why I’m me instead of you.”

“Totty.”

Todomatsu exhaled softly. “Hm?”

“Is that why my glasses have been disappearing all week?”

“...yes.”

“So I guess...It’s best you have your own pair, right?” Karamatsu chuckled, handing back his sunglasses. “You still need to pretend to be me, right? And I still need to pretend to be someone else?”

Todomatsu inclined his head, surprise painting him. “Eh? What do you mean? I’m giving you back your identity, you dimwit, trying to live with mine. Are you so agreeing that it’s better I fake myself instead? Is that how much I suck to you?”

“Far, Todomatsu,” Karamatsu stated steadily. “It’s because I learned before that you can learn when you pretend to be someone else. By being in someone else’s shoes, you come to realize how much there is to love about yourself. Is that not true? Is my painful personality not something you cannot stand? It is, and that’s why you even think of yourself as better than me. The last thing I want is you to think of yourself so lowly because of my accomplishments.

“Todomatsu, you were sick the day I came to the interview as you. But remember, that was the second interview. Sutabaa managed to accept you once, and was willing to do so again after you dropped out when we humiliated you. If they had seen you for who you truly were, then I’m certain that they would still be ready to welcome you again as the real Todomatsu Matsuno as you are.”

“Then...Why did you want to give me these...?” Todomatsu gasped out, trailing his thumbs over the dark blue lenses of the shades.

“I wanted to teach you that lesson,” Karamatsu said, shrugging casually with a small smirk. “But I just explained the mechanics in my agenda, so there’s no use for that now. I think it’s best you just return to Sutabaa again as yourself instead of a clone of me. Because, brother. You’re surprisingly good at it.”

“Gee, thanks,” Todomatsu said, his heart finally softening free from whatever claws had once gripped it. “I’m sorry I threw your jacket like that.”

“There’s always the laundry. Don’t worry about that.” Karamatsu laughed. “Come now, brother. I still have my coffee in the waiting, do I not? Please treat your brother to something to warm his insides from the Antarctica waters in which it has drowned.”

“Ugh, fine,” Todomatsu said, but not harshly, before looking down at the shades. “Are these really mine now though? I think they match your face better than mine. And I think they will miss you if they were gone.” Grinning, he hung the sunglasses from Karamatsu’s top, then stood back with satisfaction, hands pressed to his waist.

“Heh. Thank you, Todomatsu,” Karamatsu said, chuckling.

Then together, they went back to the entrance of Sutabaa, opening the door as Todomatsu cried out, “Sen-chan! We’re back! And we have a coffee pending for—!”

“Oh hey, you two!” Osomatsu greeted, hands in the pocket of his hoodie as he stood in front of the counter, Sen at the other side. “I was actually gonna ask where you were, Karamatsu! I heard you were working here in Sutabaa and I was curious to know if it was true!”

Todomatsu and Karamatsu gaped in unison. “Eh?!”

“But I guess I was wrong,” Osomatsu said, rubbing his nose with a finger. “Totty’s wearing the uniform. Now you make me wanna ask about the rumors: why was I hearing of a Sutabaa cashier who uses Karamatsu slang every time he gets an order? I didn’t wanna believe it, and I still don’t, but maybe I should be realizing that since it’s both of you involved! Of course Totty would have the best impersonation other than Jyushimatsu—you two were besties as kids, right? So it’s safe to say that you were looking up to Karamatsu for a while, Totty!” Osomatsu laughed.

Todomatsu’s stomach coiled. “B-But—!”

“Is that true, Todomatsu-san?” Sen asked, frowning a little.

“It’s gotta be, right?” Osomatsu continued. “Totty would do anything to get what he wants. If being a ‘Karamatsu’ would help him in his salary, then he’d do it. Just like he’d lie to other Sutabaa employees that he was from a university so big when all he was was a NEET. It’s simple—he’s a demon for a reason.”

“Wait,” Sen said, frown deepening. “Does this mean that it wasn’t Todomatsu at the interview? But Karamatsu?”

“Hah? Totty never went to any interview,” Osomatsu exposed obliviously, unaware of the jaws on the floor from the two brothers standing next to him. “Ha-ha! Sen-chan, right? You’re making me laugh here! Don’t tell me you mistook Karamatsu for Totty! I mean, I might, but they’re brothers, so identity thief shenanigans is a thing and so cheating is not hard!”

Sen stared. So did Karamatsu. Todomatsu felt his entire body burn into ashes.

~~~

Todomatsu’s butt slammed on the sidewalk from the force of the hands that had previously shoved him out of the building.

Karamatsu immediately went to his side. “Totty! Wh-What did they tell you, my brother?”

Todomatsu clicked his tongue. “I got fired.”

Karamatsu’s face fell.

“Welp, all in a day’s work, right?” Osomatsu said, spinning his heels and going ahead. “Hey, I won a bit in pachinko, by the way. Wanna try using that in some of the races? We might get half as much if I use my detective brain again to read between the lines!” He laughed. “Just like I did with you two idiots.”

Todomatsu ground his teeth. He really was surrounded by demons.

#osomatsu san #osomatsu-san #fanfic #bits of my brothers #zaimokumatsu #zaimoku #karamatsu matsuno #karamatsu #todomatsu matsuno #todomatsu #osomatsu matsuno #osomatsu #atsushi #hope ya’ll like it xD

[swanlake1998]

Dance Magazine Article: PNB’s Amanda Morgan Is Raising Her Voice Against Injustice

Date: June 15, 2020

By: Lydia Murray

On June 4, Pacific Northwest Ballet corps member Amanda Morgan posted an Instagram video of her impassioned speech at a Seattle protest in response to George Floyd's death.

After introducing herself to the cheering crowd as the only Black ballerina in her company—an accomplishment, yet an indictment of ballet's progress in increasing diversity—she championed accountability for action and inaction.

"Society may have tried to silence the voices of the marginalized, but you will never silence me," she finished, fist raised.

The clip has received over 14,000 views.

Dance Magazine spoke with Morgan about her activism; her hopes for diversity, equity and inclusion in ballet; and her advice for other dancers who want to speak out against injustice.

You're the only Black female dancer at PNB. What has that been like?

I started in the school when I was 15 and didn't see anyone in the company who looked like me. I remember feeling down at times, because other students would say, "I'm like this dancer," when we were watching the company. I would think, Oh, I'm not like anyone. That was hard, and I didn't think I'd get into the company because of it. But I really wanted to get in, not just for myself, but so that other little boys and girls wouldn't have to experience that.

What led to that change in your mindset?

I've always been very determined, gone after what I wanted and stood up for what I believed was right. But I had a teacher at PNB named Le Yin who pushed us to do the kinds of turns and jumps that guys did, and didn't talk to us like we were students. It gave me that confidence to say, "I shouldn't hold myself back because of what I look like, even though it may be harder."

You've been very vocal about racial injustice, especially in recent weeks, and you've protested against racism and police brutality.

In the dance world, we're realizing that there are injustices within ballet, but it's so much bigger than ballet. It's bleeding into every part of Black and brown lives and the Black and brown experience. Part of it was, "I want my ballet company and the ballet world to realize that this is important," but I also need the world, my government and my country to listen, and realize that we clearly have a system that is not benefiting all communities. It never has. We need a way to dismantle that, because we have the capacity to do so now.

Being the only Black ballerina at PNB, I've always been talking about race. I feel like it comes with the job.

On Instagram, you recently posted a video of yourself speaking at a protest, sharing words you'd written in response to George Floyd's death. And you thanked your arts family for protesting alongside you. Were the artists from PNB?

Some of the artists were from PNB, but the other people came from Seattle Opera, Seattle Symphony and other small arts organizations in the area.

I've gone to the protests every day except for about two or three days. The protests and protesters have been peaceful, but the police have not been peaceful. As someone who grew up in Washington state, it's upsetting to me that the police are not really protecting us.

Another reason I'm protesting is that the brother of the only other Black girl at my old dance studio was murdered by the police in March. His name was Manuel Ellis. It really hit me that anyone that I know could get murdered in that way. So I'm marching for him as well, and hoping that he gets justice.

It's so important to use our platforms to let people know what is actually happening.

You've directly called on leaders in the ballet world to be more vocal about addressing racial injustice. Can you talk about your decision to do that and what you want to happen as a result?

I think a lot of people need to realize that everyone wants to say the right thing, but at the end of the day, you need to just get it out there.

I know that people are doing things outside of social media and behind the scenes. I don't want to discredit that. But I'm paying attention to who is speaking out and who isn't, who is highlighting other Black artists and who isn't and who is using their platform to educate their followers, rather than doing it as a performative act, like just putting up a black box and saying "Blackout Tuesday" with no additional resources.

In an Instagram post, you recommended Ta-Nehisi Coates' Between the World and Me. At one point in the book, Coates writes that he wishes for his son to "feel no need to constrict" himself "to make other people feel comfortable." That reminded me of your speech, when you said, "I hope for a world in which I will not have to explain to my children how to act in public around police for fear of their lives being taken away."

As a Black woman in ballet, have you felt a need to constrict yourself?

Before all of this happened, I was working on a piece for Seattle Dance Collective with another Black woman named Nia-Amina Minor. We were making a piece about spatial injustice, and the Black female voice and perspective in the city and in dance. Working on that piece made me realize that, a lot of times, I've felt myself shrinking. I'm not just a Black woman, I'm a very tall Black woman. I also have a unique quality of movement, in addition to being able to do ballet.

I didn't necessarily have my voice shrink, but I felt my dancing shrink. I tried to fit in with the corps, I tried to dance smaller, I tried not to move as big because I didn't want to stand out as much. I think my body naturally adapted to that environment, and shrank.

Ballet is restrictive, but I realized that you can be expansive within these restrictions. I'm looking forward to eventually dancing again and playing around with that idea.

I've been choreographing with a contemporary style, but it's a little bit softer in the way that it's danced. I've never been able to do things that are more soft and vulnerable and elegant, so I want people to do that in my pieces.

We have to base casting on more than how someone fits into a mold. We want to push people to be the best artists they can be, and make a part their own. If we hold onto that idea, then maybe race or gender will not stick as much in people's minds.

I haven't been used in a lot of things that choreographers have come and staged, because they've already made the piece on another company. They say, "She doesn't really fit into any of these parts," but there's barely anyone I look like in the dance world. That doesn't mean that I can't do it just as well, and make it fully my own.

Shortly after you debuted as a choreographer, you wrote on Instagram, "Life has shown me that if you don't see what you want to see around you, create it." Was there a relationship between creating what you want to see through choreography, and pursuing social change as an activist?

Yeah, I think there's a direct relation. As a choreographer, I don't want to use my art to deflect, but to reflect on the world around me.

I've only had a dance career for four years, but I decided to start choreographing early in my career because of visibility. Even though I stand out due to being the only Black woman, having my voice or narrative heard was not a thing. I had to assert myself in these spaces in a different way. And I realized a way to do that was by being the person at the front of the room, making the piece.

What do you think ballet organizations should do going forward to continue the work of diversity, equity and inclusion?

To create more connectivity within organizations, because that can lead to conversation about more difficult things to talk about, like race or gender.

During the pandemic, I started a mentorship program at PNB with Cecilia Iliesiu, where we spent six hours each week speaking with dancers in the school. The students were all talking about what's going on in the world. A lot of them are white, but they wanted to know what I was feeling. Everyone at PNB is talking about how we're going to implement things differently. I'm hoping that happens in other companies.

Organizations need to think critically about, What are we showing as a ballet company? What are we saying, visually, and who are we leaving out? Whose story isn't being told? In most of our ads, it's always white people. Black dancers could see that and think, I don't really want to audition there. It's the same thing with audience members. We need to serve not just one community, but all communities.

For so long, ballet has just given a white narrative. We need to give different types of people the opportunity to choreograph in ballet companies, because then you're going to see different stories.

A lot of people say that we need to hire more Black dancers, and yes, that's important. But we also need to have more Black artistic directors, and Black female executive directors or Black board members. I also think we need to have racial equity coordinators or managers, so that if an institution does step out of bounds or something is a little iffy, that person can speak up about it.

I recently met with over 70 Black dancers from professional companies all over the world via Zoom, which really gave me a sense of our power as Black artists. Even though we can feel so tokenized and alone in our own companies, we're not alone in this, and we never have been. So many people have paved the way for us, and we're just continuing that work. We have to pay homage to that as well.

I've always stuck by the Nina Simone quote that says it's an artist's duty to reflect the times. I think if we do that, like with what's happening right now, people are going to be more inclined to see ballet, and that's how we'll keep our relevancy going into the future.

Do you have any advice for other dancers who want to speak out against injustice?

I've been reading Audre Lorde lately, and she said that we think of silence as protection, as a way to shelter ourselves from pain. You're still going to feel that pain and anger regardless of whether you speak out. I hope that people speak out in a constructive way, of course. I don't think rehashing the past continuously is the best way to do it without having action items in that conversation.

This is a global movement and a pivotal moment that's happening. If you're not talking now, but you have in the past, I don't understand the reason. This is the most important time to do it. Before, some people were paying attention, but now, everyone is. There are no distractions. People have the time to sit down at home and think. So get their attention and say what you need to say now, especially if you have a platform. And vote!

#amanda morgan #ballet #ballerina #article #dance magazine #dancemagazine #anti black racism / #police brutality / #murder / #irl death / #death /

[thecurrentonline]

What Is "Wednesday Star" Jenna Ortega's Net Worth? Updated 2023

Jenna Ortega Net worth: She is an American actress best known for her roles in hit TV shows like "Jane the Virgin" and "Stuck in the Middle." She recently got a lot of attention thanks to her role in "The Wednesday Series." Numerous followers are looking for Jenna Ortega's net worth. the web series How much does she make? You can determine her value with the aid of this article. Why not find out? Jenna Ortega's Career Jenna Ortega began her career in 2012, but she had been interested in acting since she was six years old and had started giving auditions by the time she was eight. She soon made her acting debut in 2012 with the Rob television series. Despite playing a very small part, she attracted a lot of attention. Later, she made guest appearances on CSI, Rake, and other shows. She joined the cast of the popular show Jane the Virgin in 2014, which served as something of a career turning point for her. She continued to work on the show through 2019 and won praise from critics. She soon worked on a number of popular shows, including Wednesday, Richie Rich, and Stuck in the Middle. With Iron Man 3, Jenna Ortega made her film debut in 2013. Later, she was given the opportunity to work on a number of popular films, including The Fallout, The Babysitter: Killer Queen, and Insidious: Chapter II. https://www.instagram.com/p/ClufwvgJzJu/ Jenna Ortega's Salary Unfortunately, the exact age of the 20-year-old is unknown. However, according to Deadline, starting salaries for actors on Netflix series like 13 Reasons Why and Stranger Things were between $20,000 and $60,000 per episode. It's likely that Jenna's starting pay fell somewhere in the higher end of that range given that she was an established, relatively well-known actress by the time Wednesday debuted and she served as its dazzling lead. Given Wednesday's first season's success, it is now anticipated that her salary will continue to rise. It's not improbable to say that Jenna could eventually be making the same amount if Wednesday is renewed (here's hoping!). In later seasons, the stars of Stranger Things and 13 Reasons Why started earning up to $200,000 and $300,000 per episode, respectively. Related Article: Is “Wednesday Star” Jenna Ortega Dating Someone? Jenna Ortega's Sponsored Social Posts After Wednesday, Ortega's Instagram following "exploded," according to Popcrave, who claimed that she added 10 million new followers in just 10 days. The going rate for a sponsored post that reaches Ortega's 31.9 million (and counting) followers as of December 13 is $78,869, and it is only likely to increase in line with her follower count. Now Ortega is using her influence to her bank's advantage. In spite of the sizeable payout, Ortega's feed is carefully curated and free of advertisements; she hasn't published a sponsored post since Wednesday's drop. She isn't above making money off the platform, though. Because I believe it is unhealthy for everyone involved, I must consider my social media as a business platform. In an interview with The Face in November 2022, she stated, "I'd hate to be married to it." "I don't want to worry about how people will perceive me there or how I appear to them." Just get to work! simply posts about work. I'll discuss anything so that people can view me as an actor rather than a spokesperson, which will allow me to concentrate on that. Related Article : Because Of Her Role In Wednesday Many People Think She Is Not Straight Jenna Ortega's Assets And Car Collection Home: American celebrity and highly successful actress Jenna Ortega Since she was a young girl, Ortega has been a citizen of California, where she has spent the majority of her time. She hasn't acquired any personal property as of yet. Car Collection Jenna Ortega has a small car collection despite not driving very frequently. She prefers to move easily because she is still very young. She currently owns a Mercedes, an Audi Q5, and several other vehicles. What Is Jenna Ortega’s Net Worth? Ortega Has Set the Stage for an Exceptionally Successful Screen Career at Just 20 Years Old. She is estimated by celebrities to be worth $4 million. Wednesday is almost certainly going to be renewed, and as her star is rising, her bank account will undoubtedly experience a boost as she bargains her rate on upcoming projects. Name Jenna Marie Ortega Net Worth (2023) $4 Million Profession Actress Monthly Income And Salary $20,000 + Yearly Income And Salary $250,000  + Last Updated 2023 Jenna Ortega Net Worth Growth Net Worth in 2023 $4 Million Net Worth in 2022 $3.75 Million Net Worth in 2021 $3.5 Million Net Worth in 2020 $3.25 Million Net Worth in 2019 $3 Million Net Worth in 2018 $2.75 Million Read More - Netflix Blonde Fact Vs Fiction: Here’s What The Movie Changed And What Happened! - Who Is David Dahmer? Where Is He Now? Everything You Need To Know! Read the full article

[imz1-z1]

MADMEN

First group under MM Entertainment

They are reason MM entertainment changed to music label from the dance studio

Debuted in 2017 with song called Bir Qadam, debut MV was for Beri Jaqynda

Their fandom name is MADwave 

Besides their group activities all members do other jobs such as being dance teachers, because they pay for their MV’s themselves!

Watch their documentary with English subs here

Aron

Roman Park  Born in 16.09.1997, Almaty Half Korean Family: mother, sister (his sister have twins)

He is Mad Men’s leader, rapper and dancer. He makes some of their choreos too

Aron is a huge Blackpink fan and his bias is Jennie. He also like BTS, Bigbang

Have 12 tattoos, some of them are same with Khvan Ruslan

Aron said he won’t take anymore tattoos

Eclipse tattoo on his clavicle is unfinished one

His first tattoo was “Be yourself” which he got when he was 17 and it’s most meaningful to him

His favorite tattoo is girl in the arm

Aron had piercing on his lips

Can play piano and dombra, went to dombra classes because of girl

Have trypophobia and claustrophobia

Aron have a cat which name is Ikki and dogs (Richard and Hika)

He wants to have two kids

Likes manga

Aron is interested anything that develops you spiritually and physically

Likes sleeping, sleeping and sleeping

People call him sleepyhead

Loves pizza

Coffee lover

“For eating there is a separate place in my heart.”

Ideal girl (2017): No one knows what kind of person we’re going to love, maybe they're gonna be the complete opposite of the ideal. That’s why I don’t have an ideal type. But there are qualities that I like. Those who have excellent taste in clothes, can cook well, with restraint and kindness.

In 2018 answered to same question again saying: I look at the soul not the looks

Joined to Madmen because of Tim

His closest friends are Tim, Khay and Khvan Ruslan

Aron’s favorite color was long time purple but then he changed it because too many liked that color

“I’m not an expert at love, so I’ll say one thing, happiness is worth fighting for.”

Aron never have regretted anything in his past because for him it makes him the one who he is today and that’s why he doesn’t even want to fix anything from this past

“You shouldn’t regret something that has happened.”

Have said that what inspires him is past, this moment and future

“I want to stay true to myself, stay the way I was born, the way my mother raised me.”

He likes that things are in order

People think Aron is very responsible leader and he takes care of people really well

Bad habit: licks his lips too often

He isn’t punctual

If he would have superpower he would like to heal people

For him ideal day would be spend whole 24 hour in one day with his mom (2019)

He doesn’t really watch movies, but during quarantine he did watch some

After graduating from school he didn’t continue to uni

Secret talent: he learns choreos very easily

He did describe himself in three words: stubborn, not punctual and hot-tempered (2019)

Aron doesn’t like people who smiles at you but talks bad behind your back

When he was 16 he did run away from police (NTK interview 2020)

Have drank so much that he couldn’t remember a thing in next day (NTK interview 2020)

Never kissed a girl in first date (NTK interview 2020)

“I always think of my loved ones.”

“I want to tell you so that you always remain the same regarding the circumstances. Never listen people who surround you and go to your goal. Do what you like. Wear the clothes you like. Just stay independent.

Khay

Tin Khai Lun aka Khay Born in 11.08.1999, Almaty Korean

His position in group is lead vocalist and lead dancer

Scared easily

Khay had opportunity to live in South Korea but decided to debut with Madmen

His fave food is Tteokbokki and lagman

Loves spicy food

Studied in School of Fine Arts: art and technical design

Speaks Russian, English, some Kazakh

Started dancing in 2010

In 2012 started to listen Kpop because went to Korean Festival

His favorite singer is GD

Hobbies: drawing, playing basketball, dancing

Can play guitar and piano

Ideal girl (2017): Cheerful and well mannered. With smiling eyes. Girl should have a good appetite and a great sense of humor. Understanding and sharing my interests. I like the looks of the singers: IU and Jisoo.

Khay has been wearing glasses since 1st grade

He likes to solve Rubik’s cubes, his record is 49 seconds

People say it’s easy to get along with him

Mark

Alikhan Asen aka Mark Born 24.07.1999, Shymkent Kazakh

Group’s vocalist

Before Madmen he was in Sevenlight, after Sevenlight disbanded he did solo stuff

He is still close with some 7light members (Sai, Kael)

Have said that Kael is his best friend

Is closest one with Aron in Madmen

When he was in 7light he did cook for the members

Likes to play guitar, but can play dombra as well

Religious person

"Being good human as much as I can, don’t jump in front of anyone, not thinking misdeed about human beings, not making bad things."

Qualities which he likes in people: I like those who don’t be stilted and be real, honest, positive. People who are LOYAL to their own work, to the ones they walk with.

Qualities which he doesn't like in people: Telling many lies, being stilted, thinking of only themselves getting something illegally, jealousy, vaunt

He is scared of snakes and spiders

Ideal type (2021): I’m thinking, there are characters as many as the amount of people living. Every person is not the same, so I cannot say “yeah that’s my type”. I think the person you really love becomes the ideal for you even though they have minuses. There is no standard “ideal”, every person changes it according to their choices. Am I right?

Mark prefers to write Kazakh in Latin alphabets

Said that his bad habit is that he is so sensitive

Since 4th grade he have been doing music

Did learn to play guitar by himself because his mother wanted him to play dombra

Mark moved to Almaty to study

Moora

Alimurad Ibraimov  Born in 06.12.2000, Tashkent, Uzbekistan Kazakh Family: mother, three older sisters (Kamila, Akzhanat)

In Madmen his position is vocalist

He can play piano

Haven’t dated yet anyone

Moora’s first book which he did read was “The Little Prince”

He have played basketball 

Loves anime especially Naruto

Moora got his first tattoo in 2020

Shy but when he is comfortable with people he is loud

His favorite cartoon is Lion King

People say he is smart

Said that his bad habit is laziness

Perfect day: To be home with his relatives

Likes to play video games for example Tekken and Mortal Kombat

Before joining to Madmen he was in dance group called LevelUp

Have said that his closest friends are Aron and Rem, he even got necklace from them which he cherish a lot

Prefers black when wearing clothes

"This is my life, this is my world." - about his family

His favorite food if meat but he likes everything which have tomatoes in it

When he was asked to describe himself in 3 words he said: Lazy, gets angry easily but calm fast as well

"My mood gets up every time because of my mom"

Speaks Kazakh, Russian and English, prefers using Russian

Aron was Moora's first choreographer in MM

M

Born in 8.12.1999, Kyzylorda, Qarmaqshy region Real name: Ahmetqali Madiyar Mazityli Height: 178 cm

People call him Madi, he didn't want to have this as his stage name so people wouldn't confuse him to Madi Rymbaev

He likes to listen Bruno Mars, Maroon 5

Before he became MM trainee he was in Qpop group called RedBlaidd, they did one song and disbanded due different views

Madi’s cousins are Ace from Ninety One and Ash from NKI

He is choreographer under MM entertainment

Speaks Russian and Kazakh

In group he is vocalist

His favorite food is burgers

Likes to eat a lot

Before he joined to Madmen he was in Madness

One of his closest friend is Madness's Sula

He is extrovert

Likes watching anime, especially Naruto

FORMER MEMBERS

REM

Masakbay Rakhat aka Rem Born in 30.03.2000, Almaty Height: 173 cm Kazakh Junior Clan, Älimuly, Jolshara Family: Mother, father, brother (Nurken) and little sister (Dilnaz)

Studies at Almaty’s college named after Tchaikovsky (choir conductor)

He is Mad Men’s vocalist and makes music for their songs

Rem’s favorite color is black

His fave movies are Slipt and Shutter Island

Rem made his first money as singing in Tois

Watches anime and his favorite is Naruto

Rem have dated 8 girl’s

Talks most from Madmen

Loves meat dishes

Have cat named Umi

Did leave from Madmen in March 2021, is now at TikTok House Bip House

Ideal girl (2017): A girl with whom it’s convenient at any circumstances

Bad habit: he can sometimes just lives inside his head

Rem collects action figures

Have run away from police (NTK interview 2020)

Dated two girls at same time (NTK interview 2020)

Rem have kissed a girl on first date (NTK interview 2020)

Came to MM when he was 14

Young

Erasyl Abdraliev aka Young Born in 01.08.2002, Almaty Family: mother

Is Mad Men’s youngest member

Erasyl was part of Madness (is still close with them!!)

Likes K-Pop, manga and anime

Young can speak Kazakh, Russian and English

He likes to watch videos of space and stars

Is afraid of heights

Likes to stare stars

His closest friends are Sula, Renat and Aldiyar

Did leave from Madmen in March 2021, nowadays is dance teacher in LY entertainment

Young can play dombra

He loves to play video games

When he joined to Madmen he worked really hard for becoming better at dancing

Tim

Timur Kurmangaliev Born in 20.06.1997, Almaty Tatar-Russian Family: mother, father and sister

His favorite good is pilaf

He was Mad Men’s visual and vocalist

Scared easily

Tim can play guitar

He is Mad Men’s shortest member

Lived in Moscow for a while in 2019 is now back to Almaty

He left from Mad Men in 8th November 2018

After he left from Madmen he worked for a while in MM

Ideal girl (2017): Charismatic, economic, well mannered, kind and responsive

#info #Madmen

[doyouneedtorant]

april 29, 2019 (time unknown)

This is an old piece that I wrote for an English assignment. It is entitled “The Missing Fairy Princess”. 

It’s backpacking season at the University of Michigan. For those of you who are unaware of what that means, “backpacking” is the process of choosing classes to put in your “backpack” before registering for them at a later date. It involves many hours of obsessing over the course guide and worrying about what the future will look like if you do not get the classes that you need for your major. With that in mind, it’s an extremely stressful experience for someone as manic and worried as me. At this point in my college career, I am bombarded with adults telling me “Oh, you’re just a freshman! You don’t need to know what you’re doing with your life quite yet!” when in reality, this question of “what do you want to be” is single-handedly eating away at my heart. I am a person of many ambitions and yet in a school full of aerospace engineers, aspiring business men and women, medical students, and overachieving triple-majors, I feel as if my creativity has been pushed to the side for a more practical pursuit. In these times, I cannot help but look back at the young girl I used to be who wanted to be everything.

At my preschool culmination, the teachers all asked us what we wanted to be when we grew up. All the boys and girls said they wanted to be firefighters and police officers or dentists and doctors. Yet when it got to me, I said I wanted to be a fairy princess. One of the parents laughed at me and my dad essentially told them “Hey, if my daughter wants to be a fairy princess, she can. It’s more original and creative than being a police officer, like your kid.” Now, this is just something my father has told me over and over; I can only really trust him and his memory skills to assume that this retelling of the story is actually an accurate depiction of what happened. Same goes to the time that he told me that the mothers that led our Girl Scout group had to pull him aside, because during arts and crafts, I tried to make a mind-control device to brainwash the other girls. Although I can’t remember a single thing about these events, I’ve heard these stories so many times that I can seriously see them - well, at least in my own imaginative way. I see me shrieking “I want to be a fairy princess!” at the culmination and suddenly I’m in this cute, little purple fairy costume laughing as my dad has his altercation with the other parent. I can vividly see this “mind-control device,” a black-and-white pinwheel that spins as if I was some engineer who could have actually made that at the age of eight. Over the years, these tales have deeply embedded into me that I could be whatever I wanted to be and I had the drive and ability to be or create something inspiring. And at that young age, I could have been a fairy princess. I could have made a mind-control device. And as I got older, I found myself in love with so many things - writing, singing, teaching, learning, math, English, science, animals. I wanted to be everything and when you’re eight, the idea of being everything seems achievable.

Whether or not those stories were true, there’s clearly a path of imaginative behavior that trailed off from then. Starting in elementary school, I was starting to write my own books. Yes, crappy by default, but true pieces of art in the eyes of my younger self. (My debut story was Pretty and Paris, a book about two poodles that discovered they were sisters and then one was kidnapped by a jealous ex-best friend who planned to sell her on the black market. Iconic.) I was making short films about pineapples with jobs and reality shows about my stuffed animals. I started writing music about the food in my fridge and the boys I thought were cute in my second grade class. I learned how to play the guitar and piano by my own hand and I realized I loved to write poetry. In high school, I was in theatre and started writing plays and when adults told me they were good, it encouraged that childlike creativity that had always followed me throughout the years. I was bound for amazing things and that eight-year-old girl could look in the bathroom mirror and recognize it.

But now I am 19. And, yes, that’s ridiculously young and I am fully aware how bizarre it is for me to be saying I can no longer be creative or that I cannot be whatever I want to be. But at this point in my life, there definitely is a limit on the possibilities. I came into college thinking that I would take all the classes I was interested in, that I would be in multiple clubs, that I would have internships lined up for me. But that’s not actually how reality works. There are GEs (the “general education” credits that the school swears you must take to be educated) and prerequisites that you are forced to take as stepping stones. You have a job because the cost of living in a college town is extremely exaggerated, so now the time you have for clubs is cut short. There are internship opportunities over summer but you are so tired from a demanding semester that you cannot even imagine putting in a minimal level of effort until you have to next semester. I think most importantly that the biggest shock was that if you do not do certain tasks, you absolutely cannot be whatever you want. If you do not take Biology 172, you cannot be a doctor; and if you decide halfway through your college career that you want to pursue medical school, the amount of time and effort that you would need to just catch up with the intense checklist of classes for the MCAT would probably kill you. Not to mention if you want to attend graduate school at all, the competitive nature of students today requires you to get an extremely high GPA, despite the fact that classes are gradually becoming more difficult and teachers praise themselves when they fail a whole class with an unreasonably unfair exam.

Not to mention, the stigma around being a humanities major is hard to avoid. My friends joke about me being homeless after college when my useless degree creates a jobless and unsuccessful life. Growing up in Los Angeles and attending a performing arts school warped my view on how people saw art, especially in a school that worships STEM. Where I came from everyone was going to be some sort of creative when they grew up: a performer, a dancer, an actor, a photographer, a playwright. And to be honest, I believed that. I saw my peers achieving great things while they were still seniors in high school and it made that dream seem much more realistic. With that in mind, that creative eight-year-old flew two thousand miles away from her home, destined to achieve these amazing feats, just to be told creativity is only allowed when it is flirting with practicality. Maybe I could have gone to a liberal arts school instead or somewhere more understanding of arts-oriented students, but how can one do that when the University of Michigan has so much to offer? An amazing reputation, a sense of pride that no other school could match, an incredibly talented and intelligent body of students that collaborate to increase the chance of success, a campus that looks like it was plucked from a catalog. I mean, it was a no-brainer. I knew any program I decided to go into would be academically rigorous and extremely insightful. Now, do not get me wrong, the humanities classes I have attended were exactly that, but the fear of not doing enough has become a very heavy weight on my shoulders. Everyone I meet is a future doctor, engineer, material scientist, epidemiologist, dentist, or nurse. Where were all the fairy princesses?

I decided that I needed to do more and went into what I like to call: “Phase I: I am going to be a doctor!” The idea of becoming a pediatrician was attractive; I always adored children, I wanted to find a career where I helped people, medicine and health continuously peaked my interest. So, with this in mind, I launched my pre-med phase and started to plan out the next three years of my life, the classes I would take, the medical schools I liked, what internships I would do over summer. (It’s sufficient to say I am an overthinker.) I registered for, you guessed it, Biology 172 and a statistics class, making my way through the advised pre-med checklist. Things were going pretty smoothly and then I failed two exams, started missing lectures, and had to explain to my father that for the first time in five years, my grades were not amazing. I came to the conclusion that the root of my stresses was Biology 172 and I withdrew from the class two- thirds through the semester.

No more doctor.

Right now, I am looking at pre-health or pre-social work, trying to find something realistic to pursue and the question “Where are all the fairy princesses?” haunts me. I like to ask people what they wanted to be when they were a kid and what they would want to be now, but often the answer makes me sad. My friend who just graduated with a degree in sociology told me he wanted to be a teacher when he was younger. Teachers, unfortunately, are not paid well and so many kids turn their cheek to education, unless it means becoming a professor at a high- paying university. My friend instead got his degree in sociology, but has no idea what he would ever do with it, so he is applying for reception jobs at local hospitals and clinics instead. Another friend told me he wanted to grow up to be a basketball player, but the skill required and the sheer realistic nature of the dream steered him in a different direction. If money or impracticality remained out of the picture, my dream would be performing on Broadway, or being a cast member on Saturday Night Live, or winning a Tony for Best Play, or singing my own songs in front of a giant crowd. However, the fear of failure or not having something to fall back on is honey for my anxiety.

Once again, I want to make it extremely well known that I understand how young I am. I am going to live a long, luxurious life and the worries I have now will all fit into place, and in my fifties I will be laughing with my husband and children about how silly my troubles actually were. But for now, they are real and they are daunting. It feels like everyone knows what they are doing or they are committed to suffering through the difficult classes they need to succeed. And frankly, I’m not. Every time I look in the mirror, I still see my younger self in the reflection - a purple fairy dress on, stuffed animal in hand, smile plastered to my face - and it is hard to not feel disappointed. I want to look back at that little girl and tell her that we did it. I want to tell her we became everything we dreamed of - a writer, a performer, a doctor, a veterinarian, a teacher, a psychologist, an artist, a chef. And although I cannot predict the future, I understand some of these options have been eliminated just by major choice.

To tell sixteen-year-olds that they need to have some basic understanding of what they want to do with their lives by the time they apply to college is utterly ridiculous. The way we have been taught to push ourselves to absurd heights has left no time to breathe in between class breaks. My fellow classmates are either not participating in any social scene so they can study, or they are engaging way too much and developing some form of alcoholism or drug problem before they hit twenty. Those of us who plan to go to graduate school have stopped learning in order to save space for short-term memorization, when in reality, we all went to college in hopes of learning more than we did in high school. No one seems to be super happy about what they are doing in college because despite the fact that adults have raved on about how in college you get to study exactly what you want to study, the opposite has proven itself true. I may be a speck of dust on Michigan’s campus but the alarming rate of students that feel the same way tells me that something is wrong with the whole process. During these next three years, I hope to catch a glimpse of my younger self by diving into activities and classes that excite me, but I worry that one day, she’ll fade away and I’ll just have to wait for my dad to tell me more stories about her.

#writer #blogger #writing #blog #school #dreams #jobs #creatitivity #kids #college #majors #myrants