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You said you thought about me alot still. I don’t know why it’s so hard for me to be okay but I feel like I need more reassurance than that bc I don’t recieve any calls or messages from any social media Ik you use alot and I end up not holding myself together but I don’t think I can ask you for that reassurance since you’re not mine but please don’t forget about me.

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Te odio

Odio que aún te pienso, odio que aún te extraño, odio que te necesito, odio que a pesar de todo lo que he sufrido por ti te sigo queriendo, odio que a pesar de todo lo malo que has hecho no puedo odiarte, odio sentirme así, odio que no veas lo mal que estoy, odio que no te des cuenta que me rendí, odio que no veas que dejé de luchar por algo que no va a pasar, odio que seas tan cobarde y no hables con la verdad, odio que me hayas mentido y la verdad haya salido a la luz igual, odio que estes con ella, odio que ya no me quieras, odio ya no ser lo más importante en tu vida, odio como me trataste, odio como me haces sufrir, odio como te sigo queriendo a pesar de todo, me odio por esto, odio como terminó todo, odio como me menospreciaste, odio como me negaste, odio como me dañaste, odio como cada vez que me hablas una sonrisa estúpida aparece en mi cara, odio que ya no me hables, odio que no te importe que yo no te hable, odio que ni siquiera te cuestiones por qué, odio que todo me recuerda a ti, odio estar así, odio sentir esto, me odio por estar una vez más escribiendo a las 3 am con los ojos hinchados de tanto llorar y el pecho apretado por no poder respirar, odio que nunca verás esto, odio no ser capaz de decírtelo a la cara, me odio…

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“I am very sad and I feel more miserable than I can say, and I do not know how far I’ve come. I do not know what to do or what to think, but vehemently desire to leave this place. I feel so melancholy.”

— Vincent van Gogh, Letters (1875-1890)

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As the train rumbles by, 

its horn sounding off into the navy sky,

disappearing among the stars,

it fills me with nostalgia,

of nights before dawn,

we’d hangout after sunrise,

and watch as the world fades away,

because nothing else matter but you and I,

but I guess I hit the ground too soon,

and you’ll forever have your head in the clouds,

permanently. 

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Time.

how is it

that

I’ve thought about you

every day

since July?

How is it that

on a too-hot-too-cold day like today,

after all this time,

I still am overcome with joyful, soul laughter

at the sight of your face

at the thought of being next to you and holding your hand and talking to you with no anxiety and

I’ve loved you

from the moment

I first

saw

you.

And I can’t believe that I live in this universe at the same time you do and that I dared utter a word to you but….

but I can’t imagine my life

If I hadn’t.

I cannot remember who I was before you,

and I haven’t stopped changing and growing since I first laid eyes on you.

You challenge me and scare me and you evoke this incredible sense of wonder in me and I don’t even know your favorite color but for some reason I think it’s purple and I don’t understand how anyone ever, even you, could argue that you’re not the most captivating and soul cratering woman they’ve ever encountered and

I guess

that’s how I know.

That’s how I know that I wouldn’t be mad if I got to spend my life with you.

but I guess that’s an understatement.

-g.s.

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Cake creator by my Wifeparra .Today is my birthday and happy to me lol.#rleh #rlifendshere #happybirthday #born #birthday #cake #followforfollowback #followme #flower #follow4followback #likeforlikes #like4likes #likeforfollow #liker #lik #me #cakedecorating #you #tv #brooklyn #queen (at Times Square, New York City)
https://www.instagram.com/p/CGn9D3pHGgM/?igshid=16m53e9bdti9x

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