#you didn't like it but you'd be into this because they don't look like Ryan Reynolds

[roosterforme]

The Younger Kind Part 46 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: A run in with a few familiar faces you never wanted to see again threatens to ruin your day at the beach. But Bradley always manages to make you feel safer and happier than you've ever been before. You plan to reward him once you return home, but you don't realize you might be unintentionally ruining a surprise.

Warnings: Swearing, angst, fluff, smut, butt stuff, and age gap (18+)

Length: 4000 words

Pairing: Single dad!Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x babysitter!female reader

Check out my masterlist for more! The Younger Kind masterlist.

You were in the middle of covering Natasha with sand, making Noah laugh, while Bradley appeared to be talking to Jake. You knew they weren't each other's biggest fans, so you found that a little bit surprising. You also felt uncomfortable every time the memory of Jake's kisses and touches flashed through your mind, and of course those images flooded your system right now. Your cheeks felt warmer, heated by embarrassment as much as by the warm sunlight. He wasn't right for you, but when you glanced at Bradley again, you felt much calmer.

"Heads up!"

You quickly turned and put your hands in front of Noah just in time to save him from being smacked by a volleyball. Glaring against the sunlight, you saw a familiar form rushing toward you, but the closer he got, the more his steps slowed before coming to a stop. Then he said your name.

Noah had already picked up the ball and started toward the volleyball nets with it, so you jumped to your feet and followed him, reaching for his hand as he neared Greyson.

"Hi," your ex boyfriend said as he eyed you with a puzzled expression as you held onto Noah's wrist. 

"Greyson," you replied as Noah reached up to hand him the volleyball. 

"Um, thanks," he replied awkwardly, looking from Noah back up to you as he took the ball. "So.... you're still babysitting?"

His words felt like an unintentional slap in the face. You could barely stand to look at him now after the way he treated you at the fraternity party months ago, but somehow the idea of babysitting for Noah sounded insulting coming from him. And it shouldn't. It really shouldn't.

"No, actually," you replied, pulling Noah a little closer to you. "This is my boyfriend's son." You weren't even sure why you were talking to him right now. You could turn away and go right back to Natasha half buried in the sand and pretend Greyson didn't exist, but Noah was tugging on your hand and looking up at you. 

"Mommy? Who's that?"

Before you could answer or walk away, Greyson made a strangled sound. "He calls you mommy?" Your face scrunched up in annoyance and anger as he added, "Are you dating that old guy? The big dude who broke Ryan's fingers? Because he's probably going to lose his lacrosse scholarship because you got drunk and acted like a bitch." He gestured over his shoulder to where his friends were waiting by the volleyball court.

A feeling you couldn't even identify bubbled up inside you, making you too afraid to speak. Tears stung at your eyes, because you'd been so terrified that night, the memory of it made you shake with rage. And now Greyson was essentially calling you a drunk bitch in front of Noah, adding embarrassment to the mix. And Ryan and Ollie were making their way toward you like they had a score to even.

"Hey," barked out Bradley's voice from behind you, and relief flowed through your veins immediately. His hand came to rest on your lower back, and you didn't even need to look at him to know he had that pissed off expression on his face that he saved for when he was really mad. 

When you turned and looked up at him, he had his aviators set low on his nose, and his brown eyes were flashing with a warning that left you with a chill running through your body. When you looked back at the boys, Ryan was holding his fingers tight in his other hand. That fact that you didn't even know all the details of the night at that party wasn't lost on you. Bradley had saved you, bottom line, and that had really been the start of your relationship with a label attached to it. 

"Relax, man. No need to get aggressive again," Greyson told Bradley as he tried to stand a little taller. 

But Ryan was rolling his shoulders as he said, "You fucked up my hand, asshole."

You looked down at Noah and pulled him even closer, and he looked up at you with wide, scared brown eyes like he could feel the tension around him. Bradley's hand rubbed along your back as he bent to kiss your cheek. "Hey, Princess, why don't you take Noah and finish burying Nat in the sand?" His lips and mustache skimmed your temple, and his voice was so calm, it surprised you.

"Okay," you agreed softly, bending to pick Noah up, knowing that getting him separated from this situation was the most important thing at this point. You tripped along the sand, glancing at Bradley's strong back a few times as you went. Straight in front of you, Nat was brushing sand from her skin as she stood up, and she had Jake and Javy right behind her.

"What the hell is going on?" she asked as you squeezed Noah. 

"Nothing," you replied, your voice tiny and mortified. You wished you'd just stayed home today and played with Noah and Skittles in the backyard instead. 

"Doesn't look like nothing," Jake drawled casually, crossing his arms over his chest. "Looks like Rooster might need a hand."

"He's about to get more than just one," Nat replied as she cracked her knuckles.

--------------------------

Bradley wondered briefly why he couldn't have a single peaceful day. He just wanted to hit the beach, send Noah home with Penny, and then enjoy the night alone with you. But he supposed he could still do all of that with a black eye if necessary. 

"Did you hear me?" the biggest guy asked. "I said you fucked up my hand, asshole."

Bradley shrugged. "I guess you shouldn't have been touching her then."

He scoffed. "Wasn't worth it then, and she's not worth it now."

Bradley couldn't keep the smile from his face as he took a step closer. "I can give you a fucked up face to match it. If you keep running your mouth."

"You really want to go three against one, old man?" Greyson asked, and Bradley shifted his gaze to the rather skinny looking blonde. 

"You look more like one and a half from where I'm standing," Bradley replied. "Now why don't you just apologize to me and leave before you embarrass yourselves."

"Apologize?" asked the littlest one, jaw dropping open. "For what? We didn't even fucking do anything except come to the beach."

"See, that's where you're wrong," Bradley said as he started holding up his fingers one at a time in front of himself. "First of all, you cursed in front of my child. Second, you upset my girlfriend... again. Third, I don't respect the way you mistreat women at parties. And fourth, I don't like looking at you. So apologize and leave."

Bradley watched Greyson's eyes shift to the side, but he didn't need to turn to look. He could tell that he wasn't entirely alone, and he was pretty sure it was Nat there in case needed her. But it wouldn't come to that.

"Well?" Bradley asked, taking his aviators off and tucking them in his pocket before holding his hands out to his sides. "Where's my apology?"

"Let's get out of here," Greyson muttered to the other two, but Bradley took a step closer to them, fingers just itching to make fists.

"That's not how this works," he barked out, and he got to watch the three of them have an entire silent conversation just by looking at each other. Then they all glanced at him and murmured the saddest, most pitiful apologies he'd ever heard.

"Sorry."

Bradley couldn't hold back his laughter after that as he said, "Just get the fuck out of here." He watched them walk awkwardly across the hot sand with the volleyball, occasionally turning back to make sure he wasn't following them. He kept an eye on them until they were in the parking lot and out of sight. 

"What the hell was that?" Nat asked. Jake and Javy were a little ways behind her, and Bradley had to laugh a little harder just thinking about the four of them pounding some kids in their twenties into the sand. 

"I thought you were getting buried?" he asked, slinging his arm over her shoulders, but she just cringed and pushed his arm away.

"You're all sweaty," she complained. "And I was getting buried until I thought I was going to have to jump in there."

"Nah, I had it under control," he promised. You were still holding Noah in your arms and playing with him as Bradley approached. 

"Everything okay?" you asked, closing the distance and tucking your body against his. At least you didn't seem to mind that he was sweaty as you kissed his shoulder and looked up at him.

"Of course, Princess," he replied, taking Noah from you. "They left." Your arms were around his middle immediately, and you kissed Bradley on the lips as if nobody else was there. He let his free hand drift down as far as your lower back for now, and he could tell that you were relaxed again as you let your cheek rest on his chest and looked out toward the parking lot.

"Thanks," you whispered. "I just... wasn't expecting to see them."

"Do not thank me," Bradley replied while Noah started to squirm. "I just want to protect you and make you happy. Just you and Noah. All day long."

"And Skittles," you murmured.

Bradley rolled his eyes. "Obviously. She's my best friend."

"I want to go swimming," Noah whined loudly, wriggling his way out of Bradley's grasp. 

"You don't know how to swim," he reminded Noah as he set him down on the sand and watched him run over to Nat. But now Bradley had two arms full of you, and he wasn't complaining. Especially not when you started kissing his sternum. 

"You make me feel safe," you whispered. "So safe. I love you, Daddy."

---------------------------

You just wanted to go home. Or give Bradley a blowjob. Or have sex on the beach towel under the umbrella next to the picnic cooler that you overpacked with drinks and ants on logs. But instead you were left clinging to him, looking up into his pretty brown eyes and biting your lip. And you knew he knew exactly what you were thinking. The gentle but deliberate twitch of his cock against your belly left you moaning softly. 

"Can we go home?" you asked with a grin.

"Princess," he groaned. "We just got here, Baby. Penny and Mav aren't even here yet, and they're supposed to take Noah home with them for the night."

You kissed his sternum again. "I'll wear my plug for you."

He groaned even louder, his hand cupping your butt and giving you a little squeeze. "You're making me hard."

"I can tell," you informed him, letting your fingers trail down his sides and along his abs as you started to ease yourself away from him. But he pulled you right back.

"Hell, no," he grunted. "You started this. You can just wait it out."

You laughed as you let him snuggle you for a few extra seconds. Natasha was holding Noah's right hand, and you weren't at all surprised to see Javy holding his left. They were at the water's edge, running at the waves and then backing away when they came crashing down to the sand. When you looked up at Bradley again, you whispered, "You need more sunblock. Your nose and cheeks are a little pink."

He narrowed his eyes at you. "Probably just blushing because you gave me a fucking boner at the beach. In front of my coworkers."

You pressed your lips together. "Seriously, Daddy. You just tell me when you want to go home, because I'm all about that right now. I'd love to rock your old man world."

This time you spun away from him, leaving him there next to the cooler with a little smirk on his face. You waved to Penny and Maverick as you saw them walking up the beach, and you ran toward Noah near the crashing waves. Penny made her way right to you while Maverick made a beeline for Bradley. 

"Noah!" Penny gushed, getting her shoes wet as she scooped him up and gave him a kiss on his chubby cheek. He laughed at all the attention he was getting from everyone, and a minute later, Maverick and Bradley were running past you out into the cool water and diving through the waves. 

Noah clapped in delight and shouted, "Daddy!" as Bradley resurfaced and waved to him. He looked so good, you had to bite your lip. The shock of seeing Greyson, Ryan and Ollie had worn off, and you were relieved that they hadn't ruined your day. Once again, you were completely taken by the safety you felt when Bradley was nearby. His wet trunks were clinging to him as he ran his hand back through his wet hair and walked through the moving current to get to you.

"I forgot to grab this on my way out before," he said, picking you up in his arms while you screeched. His body was cold now that he was all wet. "This is all mine," he told you as he kissed along your neck and shoulders. "And I like it when it's wet." 

"Don't do it!" you warned, but it was too late as he waded out into the deeper water and dunked himself under with you in his arms. You came up sputtering for air and said, "I'll make you pay for that later."

-----------------------------

"Oh yeah," Bradley grunted as you yanked his swim trunks down in the backyard and dropped to your knees. "I'm really paying for it." 

Noah went home with Penny and Mav late in the afternoon, but Bradley took a few adorable photos of you and Noah napping in the shade on the beach blanket first. One of them was already his new phone wallpaper, something he had to ask you to help him with. He was obsessed with every aspect of being with you. Somehow you managed to do it all without trying. You were a mom to Noah and you were everything to Bradley, even when you were teasing him relenelessly. 

You giggled as you parted your lips and took his throbbing cock as he grew harder for you. You had the place to yourselves for roughly the next twenty four hours, and you weren't wasting any time. Your bikini top was off and the garden hose that Bradley had been using to rinse you both off was in his hand with the water flowing onto the walkway. The sun was dipping low in the sky, cooling things off, and he spent a few seconds looking around to make sure no neighbors were out before tossing the hose aside and letting his hand come to rest at the back of your head.

Eyes half lidded, you looked up at him as you lazily ran your tongue in a little swirling pattern along his cock as he pushed himself deeper. "That's a good girl," he whispered, watching you take every inch of him before hollowing out your cheeks and sucking. Bradley stroked your chin and watched the soft bounce of your tits as he started to fuck your face. You whimpered as tears filled your eyes for him when he hit the back of your throat. "Fucking gorgeous."

You grabbed him by both of his hips, and soon Bradley could feel your saliva dripping down his balls. It was indecent how good you were at this. You had his number from the very first time you went down on him, but he was interested in getting his cum inside your pussy tonight.

The water from the hose was flowing around your knees when he pulled you to your feet. "Daddy," you whined, actively trying to get your mouth back on him which just made him wilder. He was standing in his yard with his cock out, reaching for the hose at the same time he untied your bikini bottoms. And then you were naked and fucking perfect as he rinsed you off a little more, making you gasp as the water met your pussy and then your ass. 

"Get inside," he commanded, and you did exactly as you were told, letting Skittles come bounding out the back door when you opened it. Bradley barely reached down to pet the dog as he followed you inside, leaving the door open wide as he tracked you across the kitchen. Apparently you knew what you wanted as you bent at the waist and leaned down on the kitchen counter, pressed up on your tiptoes. 

Bradley stroked his cock a few times as he said, "You were fucking made for me." Your body was cool and damp, but your pussy was warm, wet and tight. He eased himself inside and thrust up into you nice and hard, making you whine his name as he brought his chest down against your back. "Made for Daddy," he whispered, covering your left hand with his where it rested on the counter next to your cheek and your parted lips. 

He fucked you hard right there where you usually made dinner while he softly kissed your cheek and whispered, "You're Noah's Mommy, and I want to make you a Mommy again."

You nodded as you turned your head a little more to look him in the eye. "Do it," you told him, and he could feel all of the pent up need from the day growing stronger and stronger as he thought about another baby. His hips snapped against your body. He went deeper, pushing himself harder, feeling your walls grabbing him along the way. Bradley kissed your shoulder softly as you panted, taking every rough thrust and deep grind that he gave you. After he got you filled up with his cum, he'd give you anything you wanted. The ring was ready to go, and it was always on his mind now, but he had a plan, and he was going to stick to it.

But he could already picture how it would look on your hand while it rested on your swollen belly. And now you were clenching him hard like you needed this as much as he did, or like you could read his fucking mind. Maybe you could. The word Daddy fell from your lips over and over again, and he was a lost cause. He filled you up, groaning loudly as he fucked his cum deeper hoping it would take. The shell of your ear met his nose as he kissed blindly along your body, inhaling your sweet wildflower scent. And you kept him there, pulling his fingers closer to your mouth and kissing his knuckles, enduring his weight against you.

Eventually he spoke, his voice hoarse now as he started to pull his body up to stand. "The rest of the night is yours, Princess. Anything you want."

You stood too and stretched, wrapping your arms around his neck with a little smile like he hadn't just pounded you against the kitchen counter next to the fancy coffee maker. "I want you to sing to me while we take a shower. And then I think we should further investigate the little collection of goodies you left out on the dresser."

-------------------------

You had your eyes closed with a smile on your lips. The cascading water was hitting your face and chest while Bradley had his arms wrapped around you from behind, singing his favorite song. It was nice that you didn't have to worry about getting Noah in bed or getting dinner ready. Bradley already offered to go pick up some takeout later if that's what you wanted. But right now you were completely content as he washed his dried cum from your thighs with his big, soapy hand. 

"You know what we should do?" he asked softly. When you just hummed in response, he said, "We should plan another vacation."

"To Disneyland."

His deep laughter rumbled against your back. "Sure. Disneyland. Noah will love that."

You didn't have the heart to tell him that you'd probably love it more than the child. "I think a nice little break will be good for you too, Daddy. I'll put it on the credit card."

Bradley's hand slid from the front of your body around to your butt. "If you put it on the card, I'll spank you."

Your moan was loud and echoed around the shower as you spun in his arms. "I have an idea." You kissed his neck and his rough chin as you said, "How about you wear your crown tonight?"

Bradley's smile was handsome and surprised. "My green one?"

"Yes," you whispered, feeling giddy. "The green one we made for you. I'll go into the bedroom and get myself all ready, but I'll leave the crown out for you to wear."  When you stepped out of the tub, Bradley's hand was stroking himself, and his eyes were on you. The need you felt was indescribable as you toweled off, practically tripping on your way out of the bathroom. 

You squealed as you reached for his crown on the dresser and gently set it down on the hallway floor just outside the bedroom, and then you closed the door. Your eyes settled on the items he left lined up on the dresser, and you chewed on your lip a little nervously. The need was so palpable again, you couldn't understand it. You thought about his strong, sure body and the timber of his voice as you dragged the lubed plug back and forth along your hole before slowly pushing it in. 

Being so full made you want Bradley more. You curled up on the bed and tried to get yourself under control so you could have him deep inside you at the same time, but it wasn't easy. You made your hands into fists keep from touching yourself as you moaned softly, but you wanted to see him in his green crown. You wanted to make everything as good for him as it was for you.

The pristine white fabric caught your eye from inside the open closet. With a giggle, you eased yourself out of bed and walked toward his dress whites uniform hanging there, fresh from the dry cleaner. They'd done a great job removing your dark lipstick marks from the pants. You grabbed a lacy thong from the dresser and pulled it up your legs to where you were most sensitive right now, and then you took Bradley's white jacket from the hanger. 

You were just sliding your hands down through the sleeves as you laughed at how comically large it was on you, but you thought he might enjoy himself. You were wearing his Bradshaw nametag which brought heat to your cheeks as you did up a few of the golden buttons. Then you grabbed your phone from the nightstand before heading for the closed bedroom door. 

"Are you there?" you asked, and his immediate response from the other side had you tipping your head back in delight.

"I'm waiting patiently, Princess. I got my crown on."

You started to record a video on your phone, knowing you'd let him do what he wanted with you, because he never did you wrong. Then you opened the door, but your arm brushed something hard and square in his jacket pocket. You ignored it when you saw him standing there with his crooked crown perched on his soft curls and his hard cock resting in one hand. 

Bradley's smile was sweet and just for you, and it only grew when you said, "I'm recording. Hi, Daddy."

"Hey, Baby," he crooned, but as his eyes drifted down your body, they grew wider and almost panicked, and then he was reaching for you.

--------------------------

We are getting closer. Will Daddy's plans pan out or will Princess inadvertently rush things? Thanks @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 47

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#bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #rooster x you #rooster x reader #rooster imagine #rooster fanfic #bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw imagine #bradley bradshaw x you #bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley bradshaw x female reader #bradley bradshaw imagine #bradley bradshaw fanfiction #bradley bradshaw fic #rooster bradshaw x you #top gun imagine #top gun maverick imagine #top gun fanfiction #top gun maverick fanfiction #roosterforme #the younger kind

[blueberrylemontea-fanfic]

Sidenote

Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!reader

Warnings: 18+ SMUT, oral sex (male & female recieving), fingering, piv, unprotected sex (DON'T)

Summary: When your boyfriend cheats on you, you turn to your best friend for comfort.

Eddie had hardly heard the knock on the trailer door over the clattering rain. He was a little confused who'd be showing up here at 12:30 at night, especially in this weather.

"Y/n? What are you...?"

"Can I come in?" You interrupted him.

"Yeah, of course. Come on in."

Eddie stepped out of the doorframe to let his best friend pass. The water ran of your leather jacket, but the rest of you was entirely soaked.

"I'll go get you a towel," Eddie offered, but before he even turned around you interjected

"Ryan cheated on me."

Eddie stopped dead in his tracks.

"Ryan what now?" He fumed.

"Ryan cheated on me. With Stephanie of all people. I got to Michael's party tonight and he was fucking her in a bathroom. Real class-act."

"I'm so sorry, Y/n. He's an absolute moron, you know that, right?"

Eddie's arms engulfed you into a tight hug, his shirt getting soaked in a matter of seconds, but he didn't care.

"What can I do to cheer you up? Want to watch a gorey movie? Pretend everyone that gets dismembered is him? I don't have ice cream or any of that stereotypical break-up crap, but I've got beer."

You gave a non-committal shake of your head, so Eddie continued.

"You wanna numb the pain? You know I've got the best medicine in town." He smirked as he pulled an old joint from his front pocket.

You nodded and Eddie's eyes lit up, glad he was able to help.

"I don't want weed though," you said, clouding Eddie's face in confusion.

"Alright. Did you come here for something stronger? 'Cause I thought you didn't do that."

You shook your head.

"Okay... Then I'm confused, here. How can I help, angel?"

You caught his gaze, looking at him so intently that for a moment he stopped fidgeting and floundering for something to get you. Just long enough to make him suddenly aware you'd never stepped back from the hug, your waterlogged shirt still pressed against his chest.

"I want you to fuck me, Eddie."

Eddie's heart caught in his throat.

"You...what?"

"I want you to fuck me," you repeated.

"Why?" Eddie was having a hard time focussing. He hated to admit how much he wanted you to be serious about this.

"Because I'm hurt, and I wanna feel good. Because otherwise this is just going to be a very sad night and I don't want that. And a little because I want to hurt him. That okay?"

Instead of answering your question, Eddie asked you another one

"Why me?"

"Because I like you. Because I trust you. And because, between you and the girl's bathroom, I hear things. I know you're the best kept secret in town."

Eddie smirked at your seductive tone, he knew you weren't exactly wrong either.

"Y/n, are you sure about this? You're upset, I don't want you to do anything you'll regret in the morning. Besides I quite like being your friend."

"And you still will be. You're my best friend, Eds. There's nothing you can do that'll change that. It'll just be a sidenote in our friendship. We'll just be friends that fucked that one time."

Eddie chuckled.

"I'm here because I want this, Eds. I want you."

"Fuck, say that again."

"I want you, Eddie."

His mouth was on you before you'd finished saying his name.

You felt a wave of relieve when his body covered your own, the tension flowing right out of you.

Eddie had you pinned against the cupboards, the edges pressing into your head and upper legs, but you couldn't care less. All you could think about were Eddie's hands on you, one on the small of your back, pressing you impossibly close to him, the other wound tightly in your hair.

The kiss was rough and needy.

Eddie was kissing you like he needed your air to breathe. You gladly threw yourself into the kiss just as passionately. You wrapped your arms around his neck and one of your legs around his waist.

You needed him closer. You needed to feel every inch of him against you. Flames bloomed on your skin in every spot he touched.

Eddie's fingers slipped under your wet shirt, trailing a featherlight pattern up your sides.

You hummed at his touch.

You tugged on the bottom of your shirt, signaling to Eddie to take it off, which he wasted no time at all with. His hands trailed up your body, hiking your shirt along with them. He pushed your shirt over your head and wrapped his hand around your neck. He gave you a searing kiss before letting his lips trail down your neck. His teeth scraped against your skin, marking you up.

You threw your head back against the cupboard when Eddie nipped at your collarbone. His kisses dropping down to your cleavage. He thumbed your nipple through the fabric of your bra softly, sending a small shiver down your back.

"Can I take this off?"

You nodded. "But only if you take off yours too."

Eddie tugged his shirt over his head in one swift motion before undoing your bra. Eddie slowly slipped it off you, admiring you as he did.

"Fuck, your tits are perfect," he sighed as he took one of your nipples in his mouth.

You could feel Eddie's right hand slip down your stomach, his fingers just breaching the elastic of your panties.

"This okay?" He mumbled, his face still occupied with worshipping your nipples.

"Please don't stop," you whispered needily.

You felt Eddie's self-satisfied smirk against your skin.

"Wouldn't dream of it, sweetheart."

He slipped his fingers further down your panties, the cold of his rings giving you goosebumps. His middle finger found your clit. You let out a breathy moan as he rubbed slow circles on you.

"You're so wet already, baby. I've barely even touched you yet."

Eddie grinned smugly as he pushed a finger into you.

"Eddie!"

"Hmm that's right sweetheart, say my name."

You moaned his name again as he picked up his pace, the palm of his hand pressed against your clit.

Eddie was a wonderful multitasker. His mouth had restarted its assault on your neck and his left thumb was still stimulating your nipples as he added a second finger to your pussy.

Your entire body was electrically charged. You knew you weren't going to be able to hold out for long.

Eddie's pace was brutal, but it still wasn't enough. You nudged Eddie's cheek with your nose, his eyes locking on yours, following them as they travelled down to where his hand disappeared in your underwear.

"More. Please," you moaned lowly.

This time you caught Eddie's wicked grin.

"You want more, baby?" He teased.

You nodded desperately, not even pretending like you wouldn't absolutely beg for him if he made you.

"Ask me nicely."

Your whole body seemed to whine. "Please, Eddie. Please give me another finger. Please."

It should have been embarrassing how quickly he had you begging for him, but it turned Eddie on to no end.

Effortlessly, he pushed a third finger into you, relishing in the sound that escaped your throat.

"You like that, baby?" Eddie whispered in your ear. "You like it when I stretch you out."

You nodded feverishly. "Yes, Eddie."

Eddie licked his lips, his tongue brushing the edge of your earlobe.

"Well then you're gonna love what I've got in store for you later."

The bottom of your stomach nearly dropped out at the thought.

Eddie nipped your earlobe unexpectedly and you yelped.

"Are you close, sweetheart?"

Eddie sensed the slight clenching around his fingers, the increased rhythm in your panting.

You nodded.

"You want to cum for me?"

Another nod.

"Good girl" he cooed. I

f you weren't sitting down your knees would have given out for sure.

" 's okay, baby. You can cum for me soon."

The glint in his eyes would have been a warning if you hadn't been so close to the brink of euphoria.

Without a word, Eddie hooked your left leg over his shoulder. A scream ripped through your throat as Eddie's fingers shifted deeper inside of you. You were stretched around him so good, it felt like he was splitting you open.

"That's it, Y/n. You can cum for me now on one condition, baby. Scream for me." Eddie whispered in your ear as you finally let go.

You dug your nails into the kitchen counter as well as Eddie's shoulder as your orgasm burst through you. You screamed out Eddie's name followed by a string of profanities as you pulsed around Eddie's fingers, which were still buried deeply inside of you. He held them firmly in place until you had ridden out your orgasm.

You leaned against the cupboards, a heaving mess when he pulled his hand away.

He held your eyes as he pushed one of his fingers past his lips, sucking it clean before doing the same with another one.

With a smirk and a quirked eyebrow he held his middle finger out to you, watching in awe as you painstakingly leaned forward and sucked his finger all the way into your mouth with ease.

Your tongue swirled around his finger, licking up your own juices before you popped your mouth off of his hand.

"Jesus Christ, you're so hot." Eddie smiled like a fox in a henhouse. "You ready for round two, angel?"

Your eyes widened, but before you could answer Eddie swept you off the counter and carried you through the trailer. He tossed you on the bed, watching you bounce slightly before settling into his mattress.

"Hey, Eds?"

"Yeah, sweetheart?"

"Cuff me."

Eddie licked his lips. "The cuffs? Really?"

You nodded gingerly, "Yeah, I always thought that sounded really hot."

"My, my, Y/n... never would've guessed you were a freak like me."

Eddie grabbed the handcuffs from their hook on the wall and ran the chain past one of the radiator pipes.

"Hold out your hands."

He clicked the cuffs shut around your outstretched wrists. The cuffs had a pretty long chain, but they did link your wrists pretty close together.

Eddie took your hand and pushed your arms up over your head, his body pressing down on yours.

"Remember, Y/n," he whispered in your ear, "I can take these off whenever you want."

You smiled as Eddie kissed down your body again, teasing every inch of you until he reached the hem of your jeans. He slowly undid the button and pulled down the zipper.

He snapped the waistband of your underwear softly. "Can I take these off?"

You chuckled softly "Hurry up already, would you?"

"Oh you're gonna regret that, sweetheart, believe you me..."

Eddie grinned as he eased you out of your clothes. He pushed your legs up as he settled between your thighs. He trailed kisses along the insides of your thighs, moving closer and closer to your entrance until you were squirming with anticipation.

"You're a needy little thing, aren't you?"

"Eddie..." You whined.

"It's alright, angel, it's alright. I'm right here."

Eddie's tongue licked over your sensitive folds. It wasn't long before he had your back arching of the mattress, his tongue delving into you expertly.

Your fingers tugged on Eddie's curls as he brought you to the brink off another orgasm. You could feel the pressure building in your stomach, more intense than your previous orgasm.

"I'm so close Eddie," you moaned out. "Fuck, you're gonna make me cum so hard, please don't stop."

Eddie loved to hear you talk, lived for the sounds he could wrangle from you.

You felt the dam burst inside of you as Eddie pushed you over the edge. Your thighs clenched around his head as you screamed out his name once again.

Eddie watched you as you came down from your second high of the night. Your eyes were clenched shut, your head thrown back as your body convulsed.

He studied you as you panted and heaved. But most of all, he committed to memory the absolutely blissful smile on your lips.

"Holy shit, I can't wait to fuck you. You are just the most gorgeous thing I've ever seen."

"Nobody's stopping you, Munson," you were still breathing heavily, your legs trembling softly.

Eddie smiled a Cheshire cat smile.

"You sure you can handle it, sweetheart?"

His voice was sugary sweet.

You knew exactly what he wanted from you.

"You want me to beg for you, Eds? Want to hear me say how badly I want to feel you inside of me?"

"Look who's suddenly got a big mouth. You didn't sound so tough when I was making you cum, darling. That's alright, angel, I'll make you beg for it, no worries."

Eddie circled your sensitive clit, the overstimulation making you hold back a moan. He sofltly grazed your thigh as he picked up his speed. No matter how you tried, you couldn't hold back a yelp.

" 's Too much Eds," you gulped.

"You sure about that, angel? Really can't take anymore?"

You wanted to, so badly, but the pressure was too much...

So you said the only thing you could think of.

"How about you give my big mouth something to do first?"

Eddie genuinely laughed.

"You really are an angel, huh? Alright, sweetheart. Let's put that mouth to good use."

Eddie slowly removed his pants before moving over you. He leaned in for a soft kiss.

"You sure about this, Y/n?" He whispered in your ear.

"I wanna know what you taste like, Eds."

Eddie nearly died.

You moved your cuffed hands forward and held them out to Eddie's face. He raised an eyebrow at you and was met with an expectant look. He grinned before he spit in your hands.

"We should've done this a long time ago..."

Your hands wrapped around his cock, spreading his spit along his length. You moved your hands along him, revelling in the sounds he made, before pushing yourself up slightly and wrapping your lips around his head. You moved along his length, taking more of him into your mouth with each movement.

Eddie was trying not to move his hips into you, you could feel him straining against you. You pulled your mouth off him with a pop.

"You want to fuck my mouth, Eds?" You asked innocently. "All you gotta do is ask."

"You are so incredibly hot, Y/n." Eddie's voice was hoarse. "Would you do me the incredible honour of letting me fuck your mouth, angel?"

You nodded eagerly and licked down the underside of Eddie's cock before sucking him back down, agonizingly slowly.

"Sweet jesus, Y/n, you feel so good," Eddie groaned.

He slowly pushed his hips forward, you hollowed your cheeks and swirled your tongue around him. Eddie was rolling his hips into you, one hand tangled in your hair, the other holding himself up against the wall.

He looked at you adoringly while you stared up at him. "You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, Y/n. You look fucking fantastic in between my legs."

His hips moved faster, jerking almost out of his control. "Fuck, angel, I need to fuck you so badly, and I can't do that if I keep doing this."

You increased your pressure for just a second before popping off of him.

"Fuck," Eddie groaned. He was on top of you in a second.

"You want me to fuck you, Y/n? Because lord Jesus, I don't think I've ever wanted to fuck anybody so badly."

"Fuck, Eddie, I need you inside of me, please, baby, I want to feel you."

Eddie moaned as he slipped into you. He snapped his hips up into you as you cried out his name.

"Fuck, Eddie, yes," you moaned.

Eddie was stretching you out so well, you could feel him everywhere.

"Harder, please," you begged.

Eddie moaned out your name as he pounded into you faster. You wrapped your cuffed arms around him, straining against the restrictions.

Eddie pressed needy, sloppy kisses against your neck. You moaned out his name over and over again.

"Fuck, angel, I'm so close," he sighed.

"Me too, Edds. You're so good. Feel so fucking good, baby."

Eddie groaned as he pushed your leg up between you. You cried as he hit deeper inside of you. Eddie snaked his hand between you and started rubbing circles on your clit.

You screamed out his name as your orgasm took over you. Your nails dug into his back. You thought you might pass out. Eddie let you ride out your orgasm as he kept circling your clit. It was too much. Too good.

Eddie came with your name on his lips. He was stunning, pure bliss washing over his face.

He leaned down, still buried deep inside of you, and kissed you, slowly, tentatively. "You're incredible, angel."

"Best kept secret in town," you whispered back at him.

Eddie pulled out and undid the handcuffs. You both got cleaned up and dressed again.

You kissed him softly. "Thanks, Eddie."

"The pleasure was all mine, fair maiden. How you feeling?"

"Like you turned the worst night of my life into the best. He never made me feel like that."

Eddie shrugged. "You were too good for him anyways."

"You mind if I stay the night?"

"Mi trailer es su trailer."

You hopped back onto the bed, thumbing through the dvd's on the floor in search of something that was both gorey and funny.

Eddie dropped down next to you.

"So, this whole sidenote-thing, you sure you meant a sidenote and not, let's say, sidenotes, plural?"

You turned to him, grinning.

"I think we've got room for a few more."

#stranger things fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things 4 #stranger things imagine #eddie x reader smut #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader smut #eddie munson smut #eddie x reader #eddie munson x reader

[elektramustdie]

Missed this.

You and Ryan had been apart way too long. While you loved when he was on tour because of how much he loved his fans and performing, you hated being apart from him. 

But it was moments like this, when you finally reunited and all hell broke loose, that made it all worth it.

"I've missed you so fucking much baby" Ryan groaned against your mouth, frantically tugging up the skirt you wore specifically for this occasion.

You had gone from the airport straight to the arena where his band were performing. You couldn't get a flight at any other time, and there was no way you were waiting until after the show to see your husband.

With your bags sent to the hotel, and your panties removed and tucked into your bag as soon as you got off the plane, you were ready to reunite with the love of your life.

"I missed you too lovey, so so much I couldn't breathe" you gasped, popping the button of his pants undone as your head tilted back to expose your neck to his lips.

"Can't have that can we darling, I need you alive and breathing... always" he began marking a particular spot on your neck, the place he knew drove you absolutely wild. His fingers caressed your bare mound, slipping lower to collect the arousal between your folds. "Always wet for me aren't you, even kept your pussy free so I could play"

"If you want me breathing then don't leave me alone, could have me wet for you all the time if you weren't touring..." you didn't mean it, not really. But Ryan knew you were only teasing him, making him feel bad so he'd fuck you like you wanted.

"Yeah? Left my favourite girl all alone, didn't I? How do I make it up to you baby?" he kissed you again, spreading your thighs wider on the table as you pulled his cock out of his undid pants, jerking him off in gentle strokes.

Ryan had kicked everyone out of the dressing room as soon as he saw you. He assumed you'd be waiting at the hotel for him when he got back, so he was utterly surprised when you showed up at the arena in his favourite skirt and those strappy heels that drove him so crazy he wanted to fuck you while you wore those and only those.

He had you on top of the makeshift makeup table quicker than you could say hello to the other boys, his lips on yours before he said a word. It was all so rushed and dirty, and you loved how much he still lusted over you.

"Fuck me like I deserve Ryan, make me cum around you" you begged, slipping your fingers in his hair and looking up to him with doe eyes you knew he adored while your other hand guided his cock to your cunt.

Ryan would've done anything you wanted when you looked at him like that.

"As you wish princess"

He hooked your legs over his arms so your knees were close to your chest, your hand dropping to the table to keep yourself balanced. He pushed in quickly and in one go, a choked cry that Ryan had to muffle with his mouth escaping you. 

He felt so good, too good even, and you had missed the way he filled you up so well, hitting every spot inside you without even moving.

Ryan began thrusting in at a fast pace, knowing he had to make you cum as quick as possible so the two of you could get redressed and the other boys could come back in. They knew what you two were doing in here, so there was a good chance they wouldn't want to come back in any way until the room had been cleared of the smell of sex.

You gripped his hair tight in your hand, biting down hard on your lip as you tried to quieten your sounds. While the boys knew what you were doing, you didn't need some poor crew member hearing you cry out around your husband's cock.

"You like it when I fuck you like this? Yeah you do. Look at you, already clenching around me like you're cock starved" he teased, the pure look of ecstasy evident on your face.

"Mhmm... feels so good, oh god Ry I've missed this-missed your cock" you whined, clenching your core around him as his thrusts continued bruising your insides. You knew you'd be sore, but you didn't care one bit, not when it felt this good to have him fuck you this hard.

Ryan pushed you to lay flat and pressed your thighs together, holding them against your chest in one hand as he pressed his thumb to your swollen clit with the other. You slammed your hand against your mouth to hide the scream that erupted at the feeling of him touching your clit.

He smirked at the sight of you desperately trying to hide your noise behind your hand, “Look at you pretending to be concerned of other people hearing you, bet my filthy girl actually wants everyone to hear how good your husband’s making you feel, don’t you? Want everyone to know that I’m yours and you’re mine, don’t you princess?”

You nodded frantically, tears welling up in your eyes at the tight pinch building in your core. You would’ve done anything for him to make you cum.

“Say it” he demanded, rubbing harder against your clit in a motion that had your back arching up from the table.

“Y-yes! Want everyone to know” you could barely form a sentence, “Make me cum, please baby, please... need it so bad” you gasped, trying to hold your orgasm off until Ryan said that you could cum. 

“You’re so good asking permission baby, you can cum whenever you’re ready... Fuck, I love you so much” He leaned over you to give you a deep kiss, the deeper angle making you cum instantly.

Your legs tightened, freezing against your chest while your body vibrated as your orgasm rushed through your core in white hot pleasure. You cried out against his mouth, fisting his hair as your clit pulsed, coming down from the high of your orgasm.

Ryan came soon after, only a few more thrusts being enough to have his hot cum shooting into you and filling you to the brim, leaking onto the table when there wasn’t anymore room. He sighed and slumped against you, his head falling to your chest as he let your legs fall open on either side of him to accomodate his body. 

“I love you so much Ry” you sighed, lifting his head so you could kiss him again. 

“Love you more, baby, ‘m so happy to see you” he smiled, standing straight and pulling you up into a sitting position. You winced at the movement, watching him slowly pull out of you. 

Cum poured out of you and onto the table in an instant, making you both moan out loud at the sight. Ryan dipped his fingers into your heat, collecting your mixed climaxes on two fingers before bringing them to your lips.

You happily licked his fingers clean, keeping it on your tongue as you brought Ryan in for another kiss. Your tongues flicked against each other, moaning while a mix of cum and spit was exchanged between your mouths in a way that was so filthy it riled both of you up again, Ryan’s cock hardening against your thigh.

The two of you were like horny teenagers, and you would’ve happily used Ryan’s cum as lube to fuck again if it weren’t for the loud banging that started on the dressing room door. 

“Hurry the fuck up in there and light a candle, I need to shit” His band mate yelled through the door, you both groaned.

Moment ruined for sure... but there was always later when you got back to your hotel suite...

#smut fic #ryan ross #panic! at the disco #patd #ryan patd #x reader smut

[chocsra]

"A Waste of a Lovely Night, right?"

15! Chuuya x reader

Based off the song A Lovely Night because La La Land 😭🫶

Implied fem! reader

Content: swearing, being teenagers, classy romance, fluff, oneshot, mafia! reader, rivals to lovers?, pre-relationship, ooc? chuuya

Sorry for any grammar mistakes!

You were supposed to be basking in the evenings breeze, free from the loud screaming in one of the Port Mafia's luxurious parties; letting the wind lift your styled hair and fancy dress. Yet you find yourself standing like a solider under the night's sky, 'what the fuck' written all over your face.

There stood next to you, the former King of the Sheep; the king that claimed not to be the king everyone says he was. He was a smaller boy with orange hair about the same age as you, only recently joining the Port Mafia. His name was Chuuya Nakahara, you didn't seem to like him very much, and neither did he.

He always boasted and was blatantly arrogant because of his ability; gravity manipulation. The kid never stopped yapping and especially yelling; he and the Demon Prodigy made a scary but annoying team. It was always filled with complications, surface hatred and care; nothing you'd see in a regular friendship.

And you weren't sure why Chuuya didn't like you either, because you mostly stayed your own way in the mafia. Not your fault you're just good at what you do. Maybe it was the scowl on your face everytime he shouted at something so miniscule, or perhaps the snicker that pulled from your throat whenever you overheard the tall bandaged boy make fun of his height.

"What a sight," the boy smirked, his alluring blue eyes illuminating under the moonlight. He had his gloved hands stuffed in the pockets of his tailored suit, intaking the beauty of the city's skyline. You turn to look at him with predictability, eyes running across his sharp features and piercing gaze. He looked back at you, his gaze shifting towards your pearly white heels, then your frilled black dress; monotone enough to be considered mafia fashion. "too bad you're here." Chuuya's smirk disapated as he looked down at the concrete floor.

"Leave if you're so bothered then." You retort with a scoff, the redhead only looked at you with a cocked brow and turned to slowly walk away from you. "Nah." He replied, you knit your brows in response. Chuuya was right, the view was beautiful. The sun was nearly gone, city lights were starting to turn on, and the ocean below the hill you both stood on reflected the bright moonlight. You almost cursed at the swirling sky for granting such a sight to him; a cute, romantic couple would for sure enjoy this.

"Then don't complain." You put your hands on your hips and leaned forward with a scowl, making the boy chuckle stiffly in response. "Chill, I'm just saying.. the view is way too nice to be seen by us." he sighed, tapping his leather shoe on the concrete. "What a waste." Chuuya clicked his tongue; you got out of your position and stood straight, looking to the side, "I guess." you murmur, you two seemed to have the same thoughts. "Yeah, no offense, but you're just not my type." Chuuya sighed, kicking a rock softly as his hands were stuffed in his pockets. "Was that really necessary?" you scoff, folding your arms over your chest. The teenager chuckled and nodded.

"Well if you're gonna be like that, I'll say it first: you're not my type either, who even wears those rat ass fedoras these days?" you looked to the side, snickering a little. The boy adjusted his raven fedora, a light blush tinting his cheeks. "Don't come for the hat, dude." he mutters, brushing off some dirt off his black suit; he seemed to care a lot about his looks.

"Yeah, yeah," you laugh, watching him as he starts to slowly pace around the hill. "Actually, you're right. This would be nice for somebody who appreciates romantic scenery." You add on, looking over to the beautiful sea, Chuuya takes a seat on a wodden bench in the corner of your eye. "Oh yeah?" he inquires completely uninterested as he pulls out his phone.

"Mhm, just not with you." You say with a snicker, walking over to the boy scrolling on his phone, manspreading annoyingly in his black slacks. "Wow." he deadpans at your insult, ticking you off a little. "So you agree?" Chuuya asks, azure eyes finally gazing up to meet yours, you nod in agreement. "That's right." You smile begrudgingly. "What a waste of a lovely night." You heaved a sigh as you take a seat next to him, using your palm to steady yourself atop the wood; instead feeling fabric brushing under your fingers.

You looked over suspiciously, seeing your fingers tangled over the redheads. You both swat your hands away with pink spreading all over your cheeks. The boy's once bored eyes widened in surprise, looking into your shocked ones; he clutched onto his phone with his other gloved hand for dear life.

"Shit-"

Shit.

#Spotify #bsd #bungou stray dogs #15 chuuya #bsd chuuya #chuuya nakahara #chuuya x reader #bsd x reader #15 light novel bsd

[zqmbiescorpse]

𝗧𝗥𝗨𝗧𝗛 𝗢𝗥 𝗗𝗔𝗥𝗘..

kaitlyn ka x female reader

a/n: i've been dying for kaitlyn fics, and just the quarry fics in general, because there's hardly any and that makes me want to cry. anyways, first thing i'm hopefully posting so no bullying pls. no werewolves! also sorry if the ending feels like it could be improved, i just really wanted to be finished with this <3

warnings: nothing serious, some making out

word count: 2.4k

(masterlist)

The joyous, fun atmosphere surrounding the gentle flicker of the campfire quickly disappeared, leaving the mood somewhat awkward as everyone who had remained (being Dylan, Ryan and yourself) turned towards Kaitlyn with a disappointed look.

"What?" questioned the small ravenette, sensing the glares from the three of you while she feigned innocence at the situation she, may have, intentionally, created.

"You totally ruined the party man," Dylan absentmindedly responded, taking a sip of whatever beer was left. All of you were a little tipsy, sober enough that thinking clearly wasn't an issue but drunk enough to feel a warm woozy sensation floating around your bodies.

In all truth, you weren't bothered in the slightest by the absence of Jacob, Abi, Emma or Nick. You did like them, sure, though being with them throughout the summer was often challenging - you typically found yourself enjoying the company of the others instead.

The four of you had stuck together for a large portion of the time, and you felt you'd become pretty close; so close that, naturally, you formed a humongous crush on the confident, very attractive, super cool dark-haired girl that was sometimes a little mean to you.

With Kaitlyn, you could never be quite sure about how she felt about you, there had been a few occasions where you doubted if she even liked as a friend. She was hard to read and you were a bit sensitive so, as you can imagine, things got tricky - having a ton of feelings for her only made you suffer greatly.

Then again, when these times occurred where you were miserable, Kaitlyn would periodically open up to you and let you know that, yes, she did appreciate you. Small moments of affirmation after so much doubt made you feel so unbelievably fuzzy inside. Unfortunately, the pair of you were tremendously insecure, because of this, there was a lot of dancing around each other the entire summer, similarly to Nick and Abi.

Suddenly desperate to relish in what could be the last evening with her, a rapid demand to continue the entertainment of 'truth or dare' came spilling from your mouth.

'Someone's...eager," Ryan chuckled slowly, glancing over at you and then at Dylan with a knowing glint in his eye.

Following this, Dylan offered, "Y/N's just disappointed she didn't get to smooch anyone this evening."

"You and me both, Y/N."

It was such a quiet array of words yet everyone heard Kaitlyn mutter them - nobody said anything back.

You were so hopelessly in love with her, that you couldn't help but hang onto anything Kaitlyn said that remotely resembled a reciprocation of feelings.

Shyly, you lifted your gaze from the muddy floor to your friends around you, careful not to stare directly at her gorgeous face. Whatever you were about to say next needed to be calm, one hundred percent normal and definitely not suggestive of anything.

With a brief amount of consideration and overthinking, you said, "Well, I don't know, what else is there to do right now? We can keep playing without the others."

You needed to stop working yourself up over such minuscule things; with Kaitlyn anywhere near you, you couldn't control yourself. Not being a fumbling mess was incredibly difficult.

"Yeah sure, why the fuck not?" Dylan chimed back in with a sense of glee, intrigued to see what would happen next.

"Cool alright, Kaitlyn?"

Deep down, it was clear to you that she would join back in, but part of you still inwardly thanked Ryan for ensuring that she was interested in continuing.

"I'm in, of course," A short pause. "You're a bit far away from us Y/N, you should get a bit closer, come here..."

Watching as Kaitlyn patted the empty space on the rough log impatiently, indicating you join her, an eruption of warmth covered your cheeks at her attention being on you; her wanting you next to her.

"Yeah, come on over here Y/N!"

Obviously, it didn't feel as special when Dylan said it, though, you appreciated how it got rid of some of the tension.

"Okay okay, yes, I'm coming," You spoke up, giggling, absolutely infected with giddiness that was bursting to show. You're sure it did, a big goofy smile plastered to your face as you made your way to the opposite side of the campfire. Apparently, the delight spread to Kaitlyn since you could've sworn she was attempting to mask an excited grin too.

Immediately, a soft scent of honey mixed with something floral was all you could smell, each and every time you inhaled. It made you feel very comfortable.

"Who wants to start it off this time?" inquired Ryan, yet your attention was instantly torn away from him due to the sensation of a soft, smaller hand brushing over your slightly sweaty one.

There was not a doubt in your mind. You had already jumped to the conclusion that it was intentional. From doing an action so small as turning away from you to face Ryan, how could Kaitlyn's hand touch yours in the process if it were on accident? There was no time to think rationally, you were already freaking out like mad. And she loved it.

"I'll go."

Leaving no room for arguments, Kaitlyn's head whipped back round to face you once more, this time with a playful theme prominent within her features.

"Y/N. Truth or dare," she asked, intently, her pretty eyes trained on your very nervous self.

You couldn't pick a place to focus your line of sight, eyes darting from her straight to the floor and back at your two shaky hands resting in your lap. Not in a million years were you prepared to answer 'dare'. In what world did you have the confidence.

Telling yourself it was the sensible response, you requested 'truth' like the jittery coward you are - to nobody's surprise but to Kaitlyn's disappointment.

"Tryna play it safe, are we, Y/N? I'm not letting you off that easily," was all she said as you sat there, patiently awaiting for whatever abomination that was heading your way.

Finally, you observed as her eyes lit up with a sudden delight; her full attention, once again, solely focused on you, not quite prepared for what was coming next.

"Out of everyone here, meaning me, Dylan or Ryan, who would you be the most interested in dating...and you have to answer otherwise it's no fun."

The situation wouldn't have felt awfully suffocating if it weren't for your stupid crush, which you were starting to suspect Kaitlyn was fully aware of. Her plump lips contorted mischievously into something smug - a perfectly arched eyebrow raised while she continued staring you down.

Because of the intense stare and immense amount of pressure you felt you were under, you missed a faint flash of worry flicker in her eye at your hesitation; uncertain whether or not her question had backfired on her.

Words couldn't describe the newfound urge tugging at your stomach to let her know that you so badly wanted to date her, to be with her, to kiss her. You couldn't handle rejection in the slightest but also couldn't bare the thought of letting this go on much longer - missing your chance when you had it.

You felt yourself tearing apart because of a silly crush on a girl who was way too good for you; evidently taking this unimportant game way too seriously. This time, you locked eyes with Kaitlyn, your heart racing, making an effort to bring any remnants of confidence together to prepare an answer.

"Uhhhh, I'd probably wanna date you, Kaitlyn?"

You had never experienced something simultaneously this underwhelming and overwhelming. Really, your response was very simple, basic, and not that huge. If, by chance, the beautiful ravenette was utterly disgusted by your answer it could be put down to merely a game and everyone would move on. You would be devastated but you'd get over it.

Having said that, repulsion was the last thing Kaitlyn felt regarding your answer, instead, a frantic fuel ignited within her. For a moment, she kind of just gawked at you, a bashful awkwardness radiating from your features.

"Truth or dare," she asked once more, this time the question coming across as more demanding, and a slight shake was apparent in her voice. Desperation spurred over her yet she seemed to be concealing it quite well, aside from the little chew on her lip while she awaited your answer, the nervous habit being the only indication of how Kaitlyn felt.

"Hey, what!" Dylan interjected, "Why are you going again, Kaitlyn? It's Y/N's turn."

Though you had to admit that Dylan's disapproval was amusing, you were too engulfed in whatever was happening between you and her. Nothing but you and her. Bathing in her alluring nature, you really did not mean to take this long to respond, you shouldn't be keeping someone that exquisite waiting.

"Dare..."

To outsiders, the atmosphere didn't appear tense at all. The luminous blaze of the golden camp, flickered and your chest tightened by the second.

"I dare you," Kaitlyn breathed out, her words trailing off implying a wane in confidence. Again, she was doubting herself, even when, at this point, the both of you had been as open as you could about your intense romantic interest for each other without explicitly saying anything.

You observed her complexion closely, each insecurity conveyed on her face made your heart rate increase consequently. You yearned for her to give in and do something to relieve all the built up anxiety, yet couldn't blame her too much since you found yourself incapable of initiating the first move.

An abrupt change conjured. Kaitlyn ostensibly bolder.

"I dare you to kiss me."

Silence. You inched forward but couldn't quite make it all the way. You didn't know what it was, something was holding you back. Also, with the audience of the two boys, you couldn't help your sheepish nature.

As though she couldn't handle it anymore, impatient because of your hesitancy, Kaitlyn took matters into her own hands and closed the gap, her soft lips meeting yours. Certain she would tease you about your failure to for fill the dare, you decided it was best to concern yourself with it later - a highly insignificant worry, really.

The kiss didn't last too long. The bliss you felt quickly overpowered by insecurity, and maybe disappointment too. You had hoped the moment you had been chasing for months would at least be longer than a few seconds. Grateful you got to kiss her, yet, you needed more.

"That was...terrible. I'm sorry," You mumbled bashfully, barely audible for Dylan and Ryan.

"Nu-uh baby, it was good," She whispered back, then tugging your face toward her once more.

Whereas the first peck was delicate, shy and over in a few seconds, in this instance, the kiss was deepened almost immediately. Her gentle hands cupped your flushed cheeks, promoting you to tightly grasp at her clothes. It took all of your power to not let any whimpers or whines escape you, making out with someone while other people were around was embarrassing enough as is.

"Okay...guys..." Ryan, being the first to speak up, broke the immersion, the two of you reluctantly pulling away from each other.

"Totally digging how happy you are right now, but, you know, lodge is empty..." Dylan chimed in, somewhat less awkward than Ryan.

You shared a look with Kaitlyn, your shortness of breath mirrored after your lips had been pressed against one another's for an extended period of time.

"Sounds great, thanks Dylan," Kaitlyn rose from her place seated on the log, enthusiasm oozing from her. "Let's get going huh, Y/N?" She proposed, laced with sultry.

You stayed seated, a little dumbfounded about the kiss and relishing in the electric sensation circulating in your body. Kaitlyn gripped your wrist, gaining your attention as her request caught up with you.

"Uh, yeah...yes we should go," Stumbling over your words, you got up, waved to Dylan and Ryan and began your journey back to the lodge. Incoherent mumbling could be heard from the pair left behind. You ignored it, giggling slightly and walked beside Kaitlyn.

When you arrived, you opened up the wooden door and stepped inside, Kaitlyn not giving you an opportunity to voice your opinion on anything; her mouth soon latched onto yours.

It was hungry, and you returned the passion. Although she may have been smaller than you, she still forced you up against one of the aging walls of the building; her tongue buried in your mouth. There was no fight for dominance, Kaitlyn was in control, not that you minded. It was such a rush, her lips all over your cool skin, your trembling hands in her dark hair, the occasional raspy chuckles from her, and the whines from you. Anything either one of you did spurred the other on wildly.

Eventually, distances had to be created since you couldn't keep going without catching your breath.

"I can't believe it took us that long to do this. We could've been having hot make-out sessions all summer" Kaitlyn beamed with genuine delight, her hands retreating from being all over you to placed on her hips, taking her usual sassy stance.

"I know," You agreed, laughing," I was so scared about being rejected"

"It's okay, I was equally terrified. Better late than never I suppose. At least we know now." The ravenette smirked, gazing into your eyes, entertained by how dishevelled you looked, encouraging her to admit, "I seriously am so fucking attracted to you."

Again, you let out a giggle, a noise that Kaitlyn thought was endearing. "Well, I've been fawning over you for like ages now." You blushed, the confession sparking a wave of heat to pass over you. Even though your actions had already said enough, disclosing the information made your shoulders feel externally lighter.

"It does really suck that it's the end of camp, going our separate ways and all" You continued, dejectedly. You were overjoyed that you were finally sharing these movements with Kaitlyn but hated yourself for holding off this long.

She examined your rapidly declining mood, likewise, she was regretful for waiting, however, not an ounce of uncertainty clouded her mind.

"What is there to worry about? Of course, we can stay in touch, I'm serious about this and...I do want to be with you." She reassured you, offering a loving smile filled with comfort. "Just give me your number, baby."

#the quarry #the quarry fanfic #the quarry fandom #the quarry kaitlyn #kaitlyn ka #kaitlyn ka x reader #dylan lenivy #ryan erzahler #emma mountebank #jacob custos #until dawn #supermassive games #the quarry x reader #until dawn x reader #lgbtq #fanfic #fanfiction #x reader #x female reader

[runwayrunway]

No. 54 - Ryanair

You are watching a video on a popular video sharing service. It is a full episode of a popular and long-running show, generously uploaded for free. It is narrated by a calm man with a BBC accent of the sort which belongs exclusively in documentaries.

The narrator names a date between 1903 and the current year. It is accompanied by a location - an airport. An airplane is on approach. It has a certain number of people on board, and it flies for some airline. There are pilots, most likely two of them. They make some sort of mistake, and maybe there's an issue with the weather, or the ILS is down, or the instruments are giving misleading information, or some other thing has gone tailcone over teakettle in an alarmingly short timespan and now their approach is tremendously unstable. They aren't on the glideslope. They're too fast or too slow. They really need to declare a missed approach, but for whatever reason they don't.

The plane lands, or 'lands' - finds itself on the ground, regardless - either on or short of the runway. It bounces, or flips over, or just pancakes into the ground. The fuselage cracks, or splits, or peels open, or horribly catches fire. There is an evacuation. It's all very stressful at minimum, and an unmitigated tragedy at worst.

You scroll down to the comments for some reason. "Average Ryanair landing," says one near the top.

Ryanair (not to be confused with Ryan Air, a real but unrelated airline) is Europe's largest air carrier. It has over 550 airplanes and serves over 200 destinations. It is difficult to imagine an airline with a worse reputation - their CEO is a literal troll, their customer service is legendarily poor, and their ultra-low-cost model is one in which you inevitably get what you pay for. They are memetically despised, and their rough landings are the stuff of legend.

And yet their livery is understated, with a certain head-held-high gravitas. It is difficult to describe the legitimate cognitive dissonance which arises from Ryanair's aerosartorial choices, an effect that seems to touch more people than just me. On another airline, I wouldn't find this livery particularly thought-provoking. Enough substance to write a post about, but not something which lurks in my mind and draws my attention. But on Ryanair, it's downright fascinating.

I've said what I've said, but I'm actually a defender of Ryanair. Look, it's like getting a ticket on a bus or the metro. It's cheap (at least in theory - they seem to be getting pricier lately) and it gets you where you need to go and it's probably not going to be that long of a flight anyway so, I mean, whatever. I've flown some pretty long flights before in-flight entertainment was standard, Ryanair is fine. I never even noticed the hard landings until I saw people talking about them, and to be perfectly honest I didn't notice them afterward either. Maybe I'm just not bothered by hard landings, the same way I'm not bothered by turbulence. Who really knows? My point is that I'm something of a Ryanair apologist. I live in the US, where you just don't get dirt cheap flights like that and getting anywhere outside of your home metropolitan area by train (and even sometimes bus) costs even more than flying. Ryanair could make me board the plane by abseiling up it myself to save money on airstairs and I'd be fine with it if the price was right. I'm not a millionaire. I haven't got the money to go jetsetting around Europe on a real airline. So I mean this when I say it: thank goodness for Ryanair.

I mean, I'm not saying this because Ryanair is good, don't get me wrong. They are the Big Bill Hell's of airlines. They are the closest thing we have to John Mulaney's version of Delta. Ryanair is not just no-frills, it's hot-glued fabric scraps in the vague shape of a garment. They are legitimately comical in their commitment to service so Kafkaesquely bad that you almost wish you'd travelled by trebuchet instead! And all this for the low, low price of...well, I mean, they do get pretty low.

When I released my first questionnaire I added a question about Ryanair specifically because of its reputation and my own feelings about the airline. Multiple people did agree with me - well, it's definitely not comfortable at all, you won't enjoy yourself, but it's so obscenely cheap that this isn't really objectionable. You are getting exactly what you pay for. And, well, if you do want some semblance of the full-service experience you can pay an extra fee. Or a lot of extra fees. That's how they get you. The ULCC model relies on stripping out everything possible and then charging you extra for it. That does mean that if you need things like printed boarding passes or the ability to pay by credit card that come standard with literally any other airline you could end up paying a decent amount for your miserable cramped flight, but if you truly want the bare minimum they will charge you appropriately, and that is so important to me, because I have too little money to insist on being comfortable.

I do feel...particularly sorry for one respondent.

It isn't bad press they are legitimately a nightmare. A attendant once lied to me and told me that type of plane just didn't have toilets (it did. There was a working toilet on board) then proceeded to lecture me about 'not planning ahead and going in the airport'

This is kind of hilarious in a sad way and I'm very sorry that this happened to you. Ryanair is infamous for its bad customer service but it's rare you'll hear about cabin crew behaving this poorly at any airline. While this particular incident was a one-off, you probably will have a pretty miserable time if you need to call the airline about literally anything.

One person just answered 'bitches'.

Well, that answers the question "what is Ryanair", but why is Ryanair?

The world is full of low-cost carriers. Wizz Air, EasyJet, airasia, Allegiant, Jetstar, FlySafair, Volaris, T'Way, Azul, Nok Air, Frontier, Lion Air, jetBlue, and SpiceJet are just some of the dozens which fill the skies. They are often colourful, frequently grumbled about, and essential.

Low-cost carriers, and especially ULCCs, are a relatively recent phenomenon. They only sprung into being after aviation stopped being by necessity a luxury product. It's generally agreed that PSA (Pacific Southwest Airlines), an intrastate carrier from California colloquially known as the Poor Sailor's Airline, was the first low-cost carrier. While the large interstate carriers of the time had a sort of detached gravitas to both their services and their prices, and were often prevented from lowering said prices anyway due to federal taxes that didn't apply to intrastate carriers like PSA, a ticket on "The World's Friendliest Airline" was cheap and the service was casual and personable. The low-cost model is built on being an option for a normal person. If you don't have the money to fly TWA, you can fly on an airline which is made for normal people and charges you accordingly.

The model didn't really catch on immediately, though. I couldn't exactly say why - it might have to do with the lack of demand for air travel that wasn't either commuter flights or long-haul. There was some activity in the market, with Loftleiðir (a precursor to Icelandair) offering cheap-as-dirt transatlantic flights in the 60s and Laker Airways having a three-year tenure in the late 70s serving a similar market from a Western European base. Even today the long-haul low-cost market they served is notoriously difficult to make anything work in.

What is generally thought to be the next major player in low-cost airlines, Southwest, emerged in 1971. David Neeleman further refined the model, first with innovations in cost-cutting at Morris Air and later by raising the bar for customer experience at jetBlue. David Neeleman, though, was active right at the turn of the millennium. Low-cost carriers only really began to emerge in real numbers in the 80s and 90s, with examples that are long-gone, like the infamous ValuJet, existing alongside ones US residents have probably seen at their local airport, like Spirit.

Spirit is different from jetBlue and Southwest. Spirit Airlines is not just a low-cost carrier but an ultra low-cost carrier. As the name suggests, the difference is one of scale. A low-cost carrier provides less comprehensive and less ritzy service than a full-service airline, but they do so in the tradition of PSA, trying to provide a comfortable experience that makes people want to choose their airline. The ULCC model, on the other hand, guts out literally every possible feature and then dangles it in front of you on a string, telling you to pay extra if you want it. These airlines do not provide a good experience. There will be no baggage allowances, no extra legroom, and no priority boarding. The base fare, however, is almost absurdly low relative to even low-cost carriers, and as air travel becomes a fact of life more and more the humble ULCC becomes a necessary part of the ecosystem as the only way many people can afford to travel.

Ryanair is technically 38 years old, but it's only been a low-cost carrier since 1990. This pivot is the brainchild of then-CFO, now CEO (and ouster of the eponymous Ryan) Michael O'Leary, one of the wealthiest and most unpleasant men in Ireland.

image: Associated Press Yes, this is actually a real image of the CEO of Ryanair. I imagine this may clear up a thing or two.

Why is Ryanair? Because Michael O'Leary, is the simple answer. Michael O'Leary is - and there is genuinely no better way to describe the man - a troll. If you take David Neeleman's image during his tenure at jetBlue, a sweet everyman trying to improve the experience by sitting in on flights and giving up his salary to employee medical funds, Michael O'Leary is the literal exact opposite of him on every point. A self-described "gobshite" and "obnoxious little bollocks" who has admitted to "not liking" aeroplanes, Michael O'Leary is a cruel, selfish, belligerent, publicity-seeking freakazoid on a mission to piss off everyone in Europe which has so far been largely successful.

I don't want anything I say about the man to come off as positive. Michael O'Leary is a wealthy ghoul (and, yes, he was born wealthy, no rags in his tale) who publicly berates, mistreats, and underpays his staff. He has expressed prejudice against racial and religious minorities, fat and disabled passengers, women, and just about anyone who expects to be treated with some measure of dignity. He has committed legitimate crimes, like impersonating journalists. He denies climate change and has accumulated his massive wealth by abusing the pilots and cabin crew who keep Ryanair adequate. In 2010 Ryanair was named one of the least ethical companies in the world. The fact that he is so absurd as to be hilarious isn't an endorsement or a defense of him.

That said, here is a short, curated list of Michael O'Leary's, and Ryanair's broadly (as their public image is really an extension of his and vice versa) most Ryanair shenanigans:

O'Leary installed a taxicab license plate on his luxury car and driving it in the bus lane to avoid traffic.

Advertisements have taken open and somewhat sneering shots at other major European airlines, like Lufthansa ('bye by Late-hansa'), British Airways ('expensive BAstards'), and the now-defunct Sabena (using a reference to the famous Manneken Pis statue). These have not been simple comparisons but outright name-calling.

One time they advertised sales to 'sunny' vacation destinations, like Norway.

Generally, their advertisements push so many boundaries that they were once found to have committed seven violations of advertising law in just two years, and I'm shocked they didn't begin an ad campaign centring around this dubious achievement.

They frequently misbrand airports way outside of major cities as being in that major city, with the most insane example being "Vienna Bratislava" - yes, Bratislava, the one in Slovakia.

Pilots are forced to pay for simulator checks while cabin crew are forced to pay for uniforms and training. Employees are even forbidden from charging their phones from office sockets, apparently.

Sometimes passengers are forced to carry their own luggage to the planes! Not carryons, luggage.

O'Leary, in a bold move, outright denied that the 2010 eruption of Eyjafjallajökull had created a massive cloud of volcanic ash hazardous to airplanes (it very obviously had).

He also said he would like for there to be a recession, since it would let Ryanair keep costs low. He said this in 2008.

One time he said travel agents ("fuckers") should be shot .

O'Leary claimed that Ryanair would begin offering business class, featuring "beds and blowjobs". I'm personally not sure I would want a Ryanair blowjob. That sounds really horrible.

Also, bold coming from an airline with no seatback pockets.

Apparently they tried to get planes delivered with no window shades (though they weren't able to because of regulations).

They've floated the idea of standing seats. I don't believe this will or indeed could ever happen but it definitely is truly dystopian.

Ryanair keeps trying to buy Aer Lingus. They keep failing, and they keep trying. Obviously, everyone in Ireland has a vested interest in making sure this does not happen.

Fundamentally, Ryanair doesn't care. They can and will essentially throw tantrums to get airports to charge them lower operating fees and if they can't get an airport to do this they just won't operate there. It's like negotiating with a seven-year-old. Except that seven-year-old is Europe's largest airline.

They wanted to buy the C919. This isn't, like, a bad thing, it's just really strange for a hardcore Boeing loyalist airline and I can't imagine how it would save them money.

image: Robot8A This is the interior of a Ryanair plane. Note the safety cards attached to the seatbacks due to the lack of pockets, plus additional adverts on the seatbacks and overhead bins like this is a sports match in a massive stadium. It's also just quite ugly.

Fundamentally, Ryanair is just perpetually doing Ryanair things. Why is Ryanair? Because Ryanair is one giant publicity stunt. A couple of people answered my question by referencing the CEO saying he'd like to charge people to use the toilet, and that's sort of true in the sense that he's said he'd like to do this, but he's always been pretty clear that it's a publicity stunt:

Short of committing murder, negative publicity sells more seats than positive publicity.

Like, it's a bit. He's doing a bit. He's 100% in on the joke. For every one of the more particularly insane claims, like charging to use the toilets, he's outright denied it. Even some claims that are pretty borderline are ones he's contradicted at other points. He's a legitimate bigot who's created one of the most nightmarish work environments out there and just wants to suck money out of people by any means necessary, and he's indefensible, but that's not really what people talk about when they talk about Ryanair. They talk about charging for toilets.

Charging for toilets continues to be the number one story that resurfaces in the press and it’s the gift that keeps on giving. We’ve never done it, but it keeps coming up on social networks every three or four months, the media picks up on it and then someone writes a story on it.

Which I think is misplaced effort when he's also, for instance, a climate change denier who forces disabled passengers to pay for wheelchairs. And I don't believe for a second his climate change denial is based on legitimate convictions - he just doesn't want to have to spend more money. He would absolutely knowingly feed the world into an incinerator if it lowered costs.

Anyway, here is a picture of him having his face violently introduced to a pie.

image: Olivier Hoslet

All of this said, there's no such thing as an ethical airline - he's just playing it up to the extreme for essentially business clickbait.

I feel like the best example of Ryanair's general...Ryanairness is their Twitter account, which I have a sneaking suspicion Michael O'Leary runs himself to save money. It's mostly composed of firing back at complaining customers, Formula 1 opinions, and jabs at everyone from Boris Johnson to the British Museum. (Heartbreaking: the worst person you know just made a great point.) Their description, 'we sell seats, not windows', references the frequent complaints about seat 11A, which does not have a window. (To be fair, their website does warn you about this.) Their weird window situation actually generated my all-time favourite Ryanair tweet.

Here are some other winners.

No, seriously, I think Michael O'Leary might be writing these. I also really don't know how to feel about the fact that it appears someone at the airline - potentially O'Leary himself - has made an edit of a yassified Ryanair plane.

But at the end of the day, it's Ryanair. O'Leary himself has described aeroplanes as "a bus with wings on". As one individual tweeted,

THANK YOU to [Ryanair], for letting me see Europe for Feck All

and that's why I do think I genuinely have primarily positive feelings about Ryanair as a product rather than a company - you truly do see Europe for Feck All. (O'Leary has claimed both that he would introduce $10 transatlantic tickets to the US, and that he would make tickets literally free and make all profits from ancillary fees - while neither has yet happened, it takes one hell of an airline to claim that it's on the table.)

Ryanair isn't affordable, it's dime store. It's an airline you bought from Wish.com. It's the free pen you stole from a cup of identical pens at the bank which stops working within days. You're not just in steerage, you're on a tramp steamer. You get exactly the misery you pay for, and you go from one place to a different place.

And it's worth noting that Ryanair has at least one positive feature - safety.

When I ran my first questionnaire I asked respondents what type of airline they thought was most dangerous. Other than what's shown there was also an option for mainline full service carriers; unsurprisingly, nobody chose this. There were 50 respondents but 5 declined to answer this particular question, so the sample size isn't really significant enough to draw any conclusions from, but it's what I have. (I kind of wish I could stop to re-run this with my current follower count, but this post is actually a request. No, not for my wonderful beloved followers - for my dentist. Not joking. Thank you for making my teeth not have holes in them.)

20% of respondents indicated that low-cost or ultra-low-cost airlines probably had the worst safety records and practices. It's completely understandable why someone would think this, but without going into the actual statistics of plane crashes this simply isn't true, and in fact they're the safest category on here. While it obviously depends on the specific airline, low-cost carriers as a category are no less safe than mainline carriers. This is despite the fact that they tend to fly shorter flights and thus they operate more takeoffs and landings, which are the points in a flight where the majority of crashes occur.

How does that make sense? Well, part of it is that the airline industry has gotten very close to eliminating accidental crashes via innovations in technology and an incredible safety culture built on years of hard lessons. The world has paid in blood for crew resource management and GPWS, but it has paid, and now the sorts of crashes that would have been unremarkable just 20 years ago are completely unthinkable. Actually, in the 2010s it's quite possible more people were killed by planes brought down deliberately than accidents. But beyond that, the costs low-cost airlines cut tend to be ones that aren't safety-critical. They tend to operate shiny new fleets (better fuel efficiency, purchased in bulk) with large maintenance teams (shorter turnaround and less planes grounded for long periods of time) at less congested airports (lower operating fees) and indeed when I think about famous accidents that involve massive cutting of corners it's nearly always full-service airlines, save for egregious examples of low-cost industry pariahs out of business within a few years. Focusing on eliminating operating costs by making the passenger experience cramped and miserable allows for pouring all your budget into running a smooth and well-oiled operation.

The axiom "if you think safety is expensive, try a crash" is often attributed to EasyJet founder Stelios Haji-Ioannou. And it's true. Beyond the cost of writing off a plane, of financial compensation to survivors and families, of lawyers and PR, of having to update your operation to make sure it never happens again...as O'Leary himself said, all press is good press...short of murder. A heinous, clearly negligent crash, on the other hand, can kill an airline as easily as it can kill people. It has done in the past and that threat will never stop being there. Airlines go out of business all the time for any number of mundane financial reasons. In many cases margins simply do not allow for something like a crash. Crashes have even ended the lives of deeply historic, beloved, well-established nationalized flag carriers, so this particular sword of Damocles could cut Ryanair's control cables just as easily. And they've managed to avoid this fate, with zero passenger fatalities and only one written-off airplane - the 2008 crash of flight 4102, caused by a birdstrike during landing.

And I'll be honest, "miserable and safe but a tenth the price of a train ticket from Boston to New York" (I am unfortunately not exaggerating) is a pretty appealing package to my non-millionaire self.

...so why do their planes look like this? I'm dead serious, it vexes me. I don't know what to make of this. Hey, did you remember I'm an airline livery review blog? Look, I can't help myself. Low-cost carriers as a topic, and how they're viewed, is probably the most interesting facet of the aviation industry to me. I feel like if I had infinite time and resources I might genuinely sit down, hit the databases and archives, run a few studies, and write a book about it - it's fascinating, and low-cost carriers are something that only economists and businesspeople seem to want to talk about. I think it's about time someone approached them through a lens of history and social psychology. There's not really academic value to what I do here, on Runway Runway, my tumblr blog where I call Lufthansa planes ugly, but if something doesn't exist I will create it even if my sample size is 50.

So how about how they're literally viewed - like, what their planes look like? Well, here are some low cost carriers I've reviewed. Notice something? They're bright and eye-catching. They don't take themselves too seriously. They're fun. The original low-cost carrier literally painted big smiles on their bright pink and orange planes.

Okay, yes, they don't all look like this. WestJet and IndiGo, for example, are fairly normal-looking. And there are full-service carriers like TAP Air Portugal (and condor. Absolutely condor.) that I would say have a pretty low-costy look to them. There is nothing wrong with that. Low-cost liveries are frequently colourful and exciting, with much more thought put into distinctiveness and charm instead of a passionless appeal to dignity. Indeed a lot of my most highly esteemed liveries, including all the ones pictured above, are low-cost airlines. GOL, for example, is a snappy, eye-catchy design in bright colours that's clearly not meant to look expensive. The same goes for Breeze Airways. There's even more examples out there I've yet to touch on, like EasyJet; ValuJet; Scoot; Spirit Airlines; Frontier Airlines; PLAY (and the late WOW air); Volotea; airasia, so on - to be dignified or clean is not the goal here. Even the names of low-cost carriers frequently are very hastily stapled together and generic, like EasyJet or Super Air Jet or Wings Air; JetSmart; SkyUp; Smartwings; FastJet; Sky Airline (just one!); MYAirlines; the classic ValuJet; flyadeal; and the legendary jet2.com, making no attempt at all to seem as if they have a legacy to fall back on. And there's even more out-there specimens, like Mango or even Nok Air. Many of them have specific themes, like Batik Air, Tigerair, or Buzz, which isn't something you see on full-service carriers, which brand themselves on national identity and the promise of luxury and good service - which is boring. Low-cost airlines, if they want to succeed, have to do something to make people remember they exist.

This is the fundamental shape taken by the low-cost product, which operates with few laurels to rest on and a mission of getting people to remember their website at any cost. Much like a can of Arizona iced "tea" guaranteed to cost ninety-nine cents, literally cheaper than a bottle of water, the package it comes in makes no attempt to look classy. And I am a heavy tea drinker who considers myself fairly discerning, whose favourite type of tea is gyokuro yamashiro (which is absurdly expensive), but you literally can't beat Arizona! It's potable and it's ninety-nine cents and it sort of resembles tea if you don't think too much about it and Massachusetts summers are surprisingly hot and the can is pretty and colourful. Sure, I'd rather have Ito En, but that costs normal money and Arizona costs 99 cents, and sometimes that's all I really have, and it gets the job done even if my teeth aren't enjoying the experience. A Wizz Air plane is a can of Arizona iced tea. It is ninety-nine cents and potable.

This isn't Arizona, this is a box of Darjeeling from Harrods. Ryanair outfits their fleet in handsome navy blue and gold. Their logo, an outline of a woman with harp-like wings taking flight, is simple yet elegant, and that feels so very wrong. I actually asked in my questionnaire what the colours of the Ryanair livery were, because I had seen people expressing casually that they weren't sure they could recognize so much as a Ryanair logo, and the results aren't worth showing in a chart because they're basically as good as random. I do want to specifically appreciate the person who answered "I don't remember but it must be whatever the cheapest colour of airplane paint is", though.

But the truth is that they have such a rich palette, and I do mean that in the sense of 'wealthy'. A deep royal blue paired with a saturated gold used as a sparing trim, these are the colours of an overstuffed plush armchair, not a budget airline. Aside from the name on the winglets and the giant billboard wordmark there is nothing, and I mean nothing, that is typical for a low-cost airline. This is not garish advertising, this is stately.

The layout itself is what I call "Deltalike". Delta certainly did not invent this style of livery but they are the carrier I associate most with it, likely due to the fact that I live right by one of their hubs. The Deltalike is a white plane with a painted tail unconnected to the main fuselage body, painted winglets, painted engines, and a painted underbelly large enough still be visible when viewed directly from the side. While a 'true' Deltalike uses a consistent palette for the engines, tail, and underbelly, there is significant variation. The detached tail is, in my opinion, the harbinger of the Deltalike, and I call liveries with an incomplete presentation of Deltalike features Deltalites.

This scheme is not as common as the Lufthansa Line variants but it is still very common, with its popularity probably peaking in the 2010s. Some examples of the true Deltalike include Air Canada, 2006 Icelandair, Azul, the old GOL livery, and jetBlue. Some colour-varied Deltalikes are the old Flair livery, the SAS red engine livery, and British Airways. An example Deltalite is the old Croatia Airlines scheme, which has a painted tail and belly and engines that are sort of painted. Sure, the engines are just grey and a bit of the tail extends onto the body, but it's got the colour concentrated in the right place and it has the painted belly, it's a Deltalite. A lot of liveries have painted engines and detached tails but no painted bellies, and I do consider these to be on the far end of the Deltalike spectrum, but they aren't what I mean when I refer to a Deltalike. They're what brown dwarves are to actual stars - related but not really the same.

Ryanair is a true Deltalike, but I would even call it an elevated Deltalike. The gold trim, like the cord adorning the hems a of a thick brocade smoking jacket, has an effortlessly shallow curve as it trims the rich blue underbelly, larger than that of a typical Deltalike and with a very deliberate shape to it which at the rearmost point covers half the fuselage by height but fades away to a sort of goatee at the front. This is not a plane which sat in a puddle of blue but an intentional cloak impeccably positioned, visible not just from the side but from the front. The engines, instead of being plain or just one colour with a website printed on, large and garish, are the same white and blue with yellow trim, the last traces of the setting sun melting into a glassy deep blue ocean below a stark white sky with which it inexplicably coexists. Sure, the detached tail still looks bad, it always does, but you can ignore it at most angles.

From below the dark blue creates that distinct cetacean effect, a certain brightness-inverted countershading effect, similar to what you see on airlines like KLM and other blue-side-up liveries. The underside doesn't have a huge, legible logo, visible even from the ground on final approach. One of the defining features of the low-cost livery, in my mind, is a large, prominent website. It's tacky and a little pointless (I mean, surely they can Google your airline's name if your wordmark is large enough) but it is downright ubiquitous. Even full-service carriers frequently heavily feature their website, but it's nowhere on a Ryanair plane. That's so, so incredibly weird.

Just...think about it. Their entire identity is outrage marketing. They are the xQc of airlines - bigoted, constantly in the news, and obnoxious. And nobody remembers what their livery looks like because it doesn't look obnoxious. This is like if MrBeast's thumbnails were lovingly curated aesthetically pleasing shots of scenery that could pass for screenshots from an actual film. It's not tacky and cheap and it's not generic and cheap, it's elegant and cheap. And of all airlines to look like this...Ryanair? Seriously? Ryanair?

image: Associated Press

The CEO.

The airplanes.

Do you see what I mean? Do you see why I find this deeply strange? This is not a clickbait plane. This plane is downright unclickable. It has never been clicked. I bet if I covered the name up and showed it to people (again, I wish I'd had the time to do this) I could fool people into thinking this is like United. Hell, I've learned from my other survey that the average person clearly knows less about liveries than I, the Joker of liveries, do, and can't identify basically any from memory. I could probably fool at least one or two people into thinking this is Singapore Airlines. I may try this on a few co-workers and then get back to you.

How did we get here? I have no clue. While Ryanair did start out as a charter carrier rather than a low-cost airline, and they always had blue and yellow as their colours, their very early liveries were just white planes with wordmarks.

This livery seems to have appeared very early in the history of low-cost Ryanair. Unfortunately, I can't date it precisely - the only thing I can say is that the earliest photograph I could find in this livery was from 1994. Based on the fact that their planes were photographed in different liveries right up to then, including this very brief TAM-like BAC 1-11 livery, I think 1994 is most likely the point they committed to it.

Oh, Adam Rowden, what a different world you lived in.

Even for 1994 this is a pretty conservative livery. Sure, this was before the real boom of bright and venomous flying billboards, but it's still strange. And Ryanair is no stranger to literal flying billboards in the form of logojets for such companies as Vodafone and Hertz, often sort of hideous ones, though I imagine these days nobody would ever want to associate with them like that.

And they never changed it, except that they did - to the modern, softer curve. This I can pinpoint with much more accuracy. It was changed in mid-2003 as new aircraft were delivered, while the older livery was phased out together with the secondhand airframes which wore it. I do not understand this at all. If any airline were to just make the decision to go full circus tent and be as garish as possible it should be Ryanair, right? Ryanair is a brand incapable of cowardly behavior. But they look far more sober than even the average modern flag carrier livery. I guess they don't think they need an eye-catching livery, but I just don't buy that as a full explanation. Imagine the news they'd make for introducing something truly heinous. I think their genuine best move would just be to put a huge picture of Michael O'Leary's face, blown up massively and poorly aligned with visible JPEG artefacts, all over their fuselages. All of Europe would be furious. So why? Why is this the situation?

So what's the verdict? This may be the hardest decision I've made so far. The options here range widely. I'll lay them out.

If I were rating this based on pure visual appeal, I would give it a B-. I am dead serious - this is a visually pleasing, well-balanced livery, simple yet elegant. The detached tail is my only major complaint. But I think Saudia's planes are quite pretty and I graded them low because I think they fail at representing their airline or having a distinct identity, so this cannot be my sole criterion.

I almost want to give them an F because of just how un-Ryanair they are, like how Copa's livery is literally not the Copa livery, but that feels wrong because that's still the Ryanair livery, it's not just a refusal to design a livery at all.

Do I marry these two into a tepid union destined for either divorce or a dramatic act of arson after a seeming eternity of languishing in mutual dysfunction in Tallahassee? I really don't want to do that, because attempting to balance these factors betrays the fact of their contradiction, the mental strain I've been afflicted with over this simple, pointless choice with zero consequences except maybe one of my followers disagreeing with me, which is fine. Unlike certain individuals I will not call you swear words and say you're an idiot.

The final option is maybe my least favourite of them all, because it's capitulation. It's admitting Ryanair is special, just the most annoying golf-ball-sized hailstone in the blizzard of absurd and comical frustrations which is the airline industry. But I just don't know what to make of this miserable little pest, this plague on the patience and knees of the traveling public.

Z. FUCK YOU IT'S RYANAIR.

It defies categories by being good, but being Ryanair. I hate that. I hate it, I hate their beastly little CEO, and I dislike that their planes are sleek, elegant, and could easily pass for an airline that doesn't instruct stewardesses to kick their passengers' shins as they walk down the aisles. If I am buying a ten-euro plane ticket I do not think the plane should look like this, teleologically speaking. At the end of the day I just have no better way to quantify my feelings.

Prick.

#tarmac fashion week #grade: z #era: 1990s #era: 2000s #era: 2010s #era: 2020s #region: europe #ryanair #low cost carriers #ulccs #deltalike #cabin fever #long haul #questionnaire 1 #questionnaires #double sunrise #yeah I guess. it goes in that tag sure

[jewishvitya]

Hi! Everything I see about this hp game is just worse and worse, but one thing I don’t get is the Sirona Ryan character? I don’t get why that’s bad, but I think it’s maybe because I don’t know how to pronounce it? This game is a trash fire of hate crimes, but I truly, honestly don’t get the name. Could you please explain it? Thank you very much ❤️

I edited that out of my post because I was worried that I'm just being ignorant about it. I still worry that maybe I was wrong to bring it up. So I'll walk you through my logic, but if this is just cultural ignorance on my part, I apologize.

I saw someone on tiktok explain it, and I'll repeat that if you don't mind. There was a joke in a show I never watched (friends? himym? can't remember) where a character meets someone's parent and that parent looks like, you know, the "man in a dress" transphobic gag. And she asks "what's your name?" and the parent says "Amanda." So she goes "Ohhh, of course, A Man DUH."

Amanda is a real name. But it still got used for a transphobic joke.

So. Sirona is a real Celtic name. It's genuinely a beautiful name. And Ryan could have been harmless as a surname. But in the context of a franchise that belongs to the most well known TERF, a franchise that has the repeated problem of names like Kingsley Shacklebolt, and even names like Remus Lupin that are just "I named him what he is," I just don't think they picked this name for harmless reasons. This is the kind of thing you'd avoid when you know you're writing for a franchise where the fans are used to reading into names this way. This is a world where more than one name is an on-the-nose wordplay based on the character's marginalized identity. Why wouldn't people see this as the same thing, with the new writers continuing JKR's pattern?

This is the same game that gave the player character a slave, advertised itself for letting us visit the kitchen with the other happy slaves, and has its entire premise drowning in antisemitism. Like JKR's choices of names, these issues have been criticized for years. The choice to double down on them rather than choose any other story is deliberate. This game is steeped in bigotry, and people are rarely single-issue bigots. They didn't put in a queer character for us, they put in a queer character for an opportunity to hurt us. That's why I said I'm sure they went to a list of names and picked the one that starts with "sir." Like with the ram's horn (which could have been harmless in a different story, since ram's horn instruments aren't exclusive to Judaism) the larger context is what makes it feel targeted.

Again, if this is my cultural ignorance, I apologize. But this is why I found it uncomfortable. Even if I'm wrong to feel this way, I hope you at least understand where it came from.

#riki babbles #hogwarts legacy #sirona ryan #HP #JKR

[cowgurrrl]

From the Dining Table

Pairing: rockstar!joel miller x actress!reader

Author’s note: I feel like I should just leave the author’s note blank because there’s nothing I can do to make it better

Summary: “The love was there. It didn’t change anything. It didn’t save anyone. There were just too many forces against it. But it still matters that the love was there.” [4.5k]

Warnings: oh it’s so sad, mentions of bullying, hard conversations, goodbyes, June ruining everyone’s night yet again

Red Dirt Girl becomes the number one movie in America the first weekend it's in theatres. Box office numbers are insanely high, promising a high payout for everyone involved, and people are already talking about sweeping the competition during awards season. Peter sent flowers to your house to congratulate you, and you and Lilly are scheduled to do as much press together as possible before you leave for Ireland. It's the best-case scenario. So, why can't you let yourself feel good about it? 

Instead of basking in your accomplishments and the pride you feel for this project or going out to celebrate on the clear Friday night that settled over LA, you're packing boxes. You're only taking the things you can't live without, but going through your stuff and deeming what you need and don't is exhausting. The rooms in your house feel especially empty as you silently walk around, thinking your way through the tasks. You consider calling Ryan or your mom to fill the eerie quiet but decide against it. You'll have to talk about Joel if you call either of them, and you don't think you're ready for that yet. So, you open your notes app and try to find the strength to do at least one thing on your list of boring, necessary things that need to get done.

Your to-do list feels never-ending and daunting every time you glance at it. You haven't even thought about finding another manager despite it being the most pressing issue besides your move. You'd been with Mel since you came to LA and thought she'd be your manager for at least another four or five years. She wasn't perfect, but she always made sure your name was being spoken in the important rooms and fought tooth and nail for you. She was ruthless on your behalf. She got you to where you are today. That's not nothing. 

You sigh and pull your hair into a ponytail, debating on going through your books or closet, when a loud knock sounds from downstairs. To call it a knock is a little generous. It sounds like someone is pounding on your door, but you're not expecting anyone. You grab the baseball bat from your bedroom closet before walking down the stairs and approaching the front door. Your knuckles turn white around the grip as you peek through the peephole to see who could possibly be pounding on your door at nine pm. The second you figure out who it is, you drop the bat and scramble to open the door.

"Ellie?" You ask, cutting her off mid-raised fist. Her hair is in her face, and she's wearing her glasses, your porch light casting shadows over her eyes. A big backpack is slung over her big hoodie, and she looks distraught.

"My dad said I can still talk to you if I want. Is that true?" She asks breathlessly, and you look behind her to see if Joel or Sarah dropped her off but find nothing. You take a deep breath and nod.

"Come in," you say, opening the door wider for her to come in. She takes two long strides over your threshold and into your home while you wrack your brain about how to handle this. Is there a handbook out there for talking to your ex-boyfriend's daughter? "Please tell me you didn't ride your bike here."

"No, I took an Uber." She says nonchalantly as you follow her into your living room. You chuckle and turn to ask her if she wants water or a snack but stop yourself short when you finally get a look at her black eye.

"Oh, my God! What happened?" 

"It's not a big deal." She says as you force her to sit at your dining table, put her backpack down, and carefully take her glasses off her face. She winces when you put your hand on her chin to turn her face so you can see her eye better. Under the glow of your kitchen lights, you find a swelling bruise on her jaw and a cut on her nose. How did you not see her injuries in the dark? 

You rush around, gathering ice and a bandaid for her nose. She doesn't say anything as she sits there, looking pretty miserable, and your heart aches at the pout of her lips. You hand her an ice pack to hold to her head while you clean and bandage the cut across her nose. None of the bruises look especially scary, and despite a little blood staining her cheek, she's perfectly fine. You take out your phone flashlight and shine the light across her pupils, watching them dilate accordingly.

"Are you a nurse all of a sudden?" She asks, and you smile as you put your phone face down on the table in front of you. 

"No, but I've played them enough on TV to know how to check for a concussion."

"Oh, is that the requirement?" She asks, and you hum. She fights a smile as she breaks eye contact with you to look down at her hands, which you notice are also bruised and cracked. "Dad told me you guys broke up." She says quietly. She looks so defeated with her slouched posture and nervous foot tapping. You know now is not a time to lie to her.

"Yeah, we did."

"Why?"

"It's complicated." 

"That's exactly what Dad said," she says. The idea of you and Joel parroting each other from opposite sides of the city pulls all the air from you and leaves you floundering. "I'm not a kid. You can tell me what happened." And she's right. She's fourteen. She's old enough to understand how relationships work, but you don't know if it's your place to tell her what happened. You don't know what you're allowed to tell her. You don't know if you're overstepping or how to fix it if you are. 

"Sometimes," you start uncertainly, hoping the words will find you along the way. "Sometimes, two people can really care about each other, but that doesn't mean they'll be together forever or even good for each other." You say, and she makes a face.

"That sucks."

"Yeah, it does," you sigh. "Now that I told you that, can you tell me why you're showing up at my doorstep at nine o'clock at night?" You change the subject, and she bites her bottom lip as her foot tapping speeds up. 

"Dad and I got into a fight." 

"Does it have anything to do with your shiner?" You ask, nodding in the direction of her black eye.

"He didn't even try to hear my side of the story!"

"Which is?" You ask, and she very quickly dives into a story of a kid who's been picking on her all year. She said she told Joel what was happening, and he said something about ignoring it or talking to the teacher, which wasn't working. Apparently, the kids' parents are some big-shot tech people the teachers don't like dealing with, so they were just gonna let him do whatever until the end of the school year. Today, he said something along the lines of Sarah's mom coming back and Ellie's mom never being able to.

"And I never even knew her! But that's still my fucking mom, and I know how sensitive Sarah is about Angela, and I just got so angry that I hit him. A lot." She says like she's waiting for you to argue with her, but you can't even imagine yelling at her after hearing that. You open your phone and open your notes app.

"What's your teacher's name?" You ask. She tells you, and you have to take several deep breaths to stop yourself from finding the teacher's phone number and calling him to ask him if he thinks it's acceptable for a student to taunt another student's dead mother. "I'll call the school on Monday, okay? That kind of behavior is disgusting, and you were justified in what you did." You say, grabbing her hand and squeezing. She nods and smiles softly as she looks at you, her dark brown eyes looking right through you. 

"You know, I don't usually like most of the people my dad dates," she says. "But I really liked you." Her use of the past tense cuts deep inside you, and you swallow thickly.

"Yeah. I like you too," you smile. "But, just because your dad and I aren't together anymore doesn't mean we can't still hang out or talk. I still care about you and your sister, and I've got quite a few movies I still need to watch." You say, and she nods, but there's something sad in her movements. You wonder if Joel told the girls about Ireland and how they reacted. Even if he didn't, Ellie is smart. She sees the boxes in your living room and the stuff piled together. She knows something is happening. Something that will impede future movie nights and emergency visits in the middle of the night. She shifts in her seat and lets go of your hand to tug at her ponytail, effectively retracting from you.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

"Did you love my dad?" She asks, and you bite the inside of your cheek, shaking your head. You think about lying or just not answering her question altogether, but that's not fair. She opened up to you. She trusted you, and you know what it feels like to have that trust broken or not reciprocated. You stare into her eyes and try to not get emotional.

"Yeah, I did." 

"Did you break up because of us?" 

"Honey, no. No, not at all," you say, perching on the edge of your chair so your knees are touching. "Your dad and I... have very different lives and schedules, and we tried. We really, really tried, but I don't think the timing is right for us. I don't know if it'll ever be right for us, but you and your sister had nothing to do with why we broke up, okay?" You say, slouching a little to get in her eye line, and she nods. "When I found out about you guys, I wasn't scared or intimidated. I was excited because your dad only ever told me how beautiful, and brilliant, and amazing, and kind his daughters were, but when I met you, you exceeded all that. You and Sarah have become two of my favorite people on this planet, and there will never be a time when I don't cheer you guys on or want what's absolutely best for you. I mean, if I didn't like you, do you think I would've opened the door?" You ask, and she laughs. The sound makes you smile, and you put your hand on her knee. 

"You, Ellie Miller, are going to do incredible things, and I can't wait to watch it." 

"Thank you." She says softly, and you nod. There, in your kitchen, you share a quiet moment with Ellie where neither of you needs to say anything more. The love says everything you can't bring yourself to voice just yet. If you squint, you can imagine what her mother must've looked like. All big eyes and toothy grins and wavy hair. But even without any actual Miller DNA flowing through her veins, you see Joel, too. You see how he raises his eyebrows or can't hide what he's thinking to save his life. You see his smile. You see his kindness and anxiety. You see all the best parts of him. This time with her feels like a warm hug, as much as a goodbye. Nostalgic and sad and welcome all at the same time. You don't know when you'll be able to sit at a table with Ellie Miller and just stare at her again, but you know if you never see her again, you can count yourself lucky to have met such an amazing young woman. She must make her mom so proud.

"You know I have to call your dad to tell him you're here, right?" You ask quietly, and she nods. You sit there for another second before grabbing your phone and walking into the next room to call Joel. Your heart pounds in your chest as you stare at his contact information, a picture of him with his tongue out still set as his contact photo. You took it on Facetime when he was still in Texas. He was complaining about how his stomach hurt from eating too much barbeque, and he was pretending to be dead. Even after everything, it still makes you smile. You press the call button before you lose the courage to do so. He picks up on the second ring.

"Hey, I can't really talk right now. Ellie and I got into a fight, and she ran off, and I don't know what to do. Has she talked to you? Do you know where she might be?" He says quickly, sounding frantic as he shuffles with something on the other end.

"Yeah, she showed up on my doorstep about thirty minutes ago. She's fine. A little upset, but she's safe." You say and hear him sigh with relief. 

"Thank God. Okay, I'm comin' to get her. Can you keep her there until I can get to your house?"

"Of course."

"Thank you," he says. Neither of you immediately ends the call, but you don't say anything either. You can hear him breathing and imagine him standing there, flush with worry, and grinding his teeth despite the number of times you've told him to stop. It's the closest you two have been in weeks. "I really fucked up." He finally says, and you take a breath.

"All the best parents do."

"Yeah?" He asks, that familiar lilt returning to his voice. Your heart squeezes, and you nod.

"Yeah. Reminds your kids that you're human too."

"I guess," he says. It's quiet for another five seconds before he clears his throat. "Thank you for takin' care of her."

"She's a good kid."

"Yeah, she is." 

"I'll..." you start. You know you're talking in circles but don't want to get off the phone. He waits you out. "I'll see you soon." You finally say, and the phone moves against his ear.

"See you soon." He says, hesitating before ending the call. You exhale and stare at his contact photo for another second before locking your phone and walking back to the main living area. Ellie has moved from the dining room table to the couch, an old leather-bound book in her hands. You tilt your head to read the title. Much Ado About Nothing. One of your favorite Shakespeare plays that you never got to do. You perch on the edge of the couch near Ellie and smile when she puts her book down to look at you.

"That book looks older than you." 

"That's 'cause it is. It was my dad's in high school." She says, and you look at her, confused. 

"What?"  

"Yeah. He said his music teacher bought it for him or something. Dad really liked him. Wrote his name down in the acknowledgments in his first album and everything." She shrugs like it's nothing. Suddenly, you're back in New York with Joel, his hand over your heart as he listens to you recite a centuries-old monologue.

"He told me he didn't study Shakespeare in school."

"He probably didn't want you to know he's a massive nerd. He loves it. He made us go to the Globe Theatre when we were in England. It was actually pretty cool," she yawns. "I'm tired. Can I go lay down in one of the beds until my dad gets here?" 

"Uh, yeah. Yeah, that's fine. My room is up the stairs and to the left. I just got new pillows, so that'll probably be the most comfortable." You say, your brain still struggling to piece together what she just said. She yawns again and gives you a thumbs-up before standing with her book in hand and disappearing up the stairs.

Joel told you he didn't know anything about something you, apparently, both love. Why? Was he quizzing you? Was he trying to figure out if you actually know what you're talking about? Or was he trying to get another perspective? Did he pretend not to know so you could explain it to him in your own way? How the fuck did you not know? You want to call and ask him all these things, but you don't. You wait.

You rotate between anxiously pacing your living room, checking on Ellie (who's snoring in your bed with the book open next to her), organizing and reorganizing your stuff into boxes. Anything to keep your mind busy until Joel can get there. From the time you ended the call to when your front door opened and closed quietly, twenty minutes had passed, but it felt like a lifetime. Joel walks into the living room like it's his own house and smiles when he sees you, looking around the room for Ellie. He wearing his own glasses and a plain black shirt with jeans. The bags under his eyes are prominent, and his hair is messy. He looks exhausted.

"She went upstairs to lie down and fell asleep. I didn't want to wake her up." You answer his unspoken question, and he nods, his shoulders visibly dropping.

"No, that's okay. I'm glad she's gettin' some rest," he says, sighing deeply. "Did she tell you bout our fight?" 

"A little bit, yeah," you say, and he grimaces. You glance between the place where you and Ellie were sitting and him. "Do you wanna sit?" You ask, and he nods. Carefully, without even grazing each other, you sit across from him and stare at him. You don't know what you're supposed to say. You don't know if you're supposed to say anything. 

"You still doin' that movie with Pike?" He beats you to it, and you nod. There's no frustration or anger in his question, only curiosity. 

"I leave for Ireland in two weeks." 

"Ireland's beautiful." 

"It is." You say, not sure how else to respond. He shifts in his seat and looks at his hands as he nervously taps a rhythm into your table. 

"Thank you again for takin' her in and makin' sure she was safe. I really appreciate it." He says.

"I'm just happy she knew she could come here."

"Me too," he says. "Can we... do you wanna... I just need to say I'm sorry. I never wanted to hurt you, but I did, and I'm sorry. I should've been better and more honest and less of a dick. You didn't deserve that." He word vomits, and your fingers twitch to reach for his. You take a deep breath and stare at him, watching his emotions play out behind his glasses.

"Thank you for apologizing," you say. "And I'm sorry, too. For everything. I wish things could be different."

"We could start over. Maybe try again," he says, his voice sad like he's trying, but he knows your answer won't change. "I don't... I don't know how to do this. But I wanna learn. I wanna learn for you." His words cut straight through to your heart, and your eyes flutter shut. You pinch the inside of your thigh to stop tears from forming, and take a shaky breath. He doesn't rush you. When you open your eyes, he's staring at you like you hung the moon and the stars.

"Sarah's gonna need you as she figures her mom out. It's gonna be hard, and she loves you more than I've ever seen a teenage girl love her dad. Ellie's gonna feel out of place, and she's gonna need you too. It wouldn't be fair to any of you to add this," you gesture between the two of you. "To that mix. It'd be too much. None of us would feel good about it. We'd all walk away a little burned and lot pissed off. I don't want that for us." You say, and he nods.  

"It's a nice dream." He says sadly.

"It is," you agree. "Can I ask you a question?"

"'Course." 

"When did it stop being fake for you?" You ask. He shakes his head, and his Adam's apple bobs.

"It was never fake for me. It just took me a little longer to figure out," he says, and you pinch your thigh again. "What bout you?"

"Texas," you admit, only a little ashamed at how late your answer is in comparison. "When you called me every day from Texas. That's when it stopped being fake for me," a tear spills from your eye, and Joel wipes it away before you can. His thumb is warm and familiar, and you almost lean into his touch before it can disappear completely. "This sucks."

"Yeah, it does."

"Do I, at least, get to know what songs on the newest album are about me?" You joke, and he laughs. He presses his lips together and rests his head on his hand as he looks at you.

"All of 'em," he says. "All of 'em are about you. Bout meetin' you or the way you talk in your sleep, but a lot of 'em are about New York."

"Yeah?" 

"Yeah."

"That was a good time," you say. "Ellie, um... Ellie told me about your trip to the Globe Theatre. Told me all about how much her dad loves Shakespeare," he chuckles like a kid caught with candy, and you smile. "Why'd you tell me you didn't know anything about it?"

"I don't know," he shrugs. "I really don't. I was thinkin' bout it the other day, and I just remembered seein' how much you loved it. Your eyes got real wide, and you got so excited, and I just... wanted to hear you talk about it. I think I would've stayed there with you all day if I could've." He says. You have to look away from him to hide to tears pooling in your eyes. 

This shouldn't be this hard. You're supposed to meet someone you love, and nothing else matters, and you get to be with that person forever. It's hard, but you get your whole lives to figure it out together. Who did you hurt in a past life that took this opportunity away? It's not fair. You want to rip the sky apart and scream at God and demand an explanation. You want someone to blame. You want more time. You want him, and not just the good parts that made you fall in love with him. You want the broken and ridged parts he's still hiding from you. You want the parts he hates. You want to lay them out on the table and show him you don't flinch when they catch the light. 

He puts his hand on your shoulder as tears fall from your eyes, and you sniffle. His thumb presses soothingly into your skin, and you let him. You shouldn't, but you do. You don't fall into his arms and sob like you want to. No, just like every juncture of your life thus far, you let yourself cry quietly and without fuss because there are things to do. And when you're done, you turn to look at him and see tears staining his cheeks too. You cover his hand with yours and squeeze his fingers, and he takes a deep breath.

"What are we gonna do now?" He asks. You pull his hand off your shoulder and hold it in your lap, both your hands covering his large one. You smile through your tears and kiss the top of his hand.

"I'm gonna go to Ireland, and you're gonna release your album. It'll hit the top of the charts overnight, and people will be singing your praises from the rooftops and speculating on what different songs mean like they always do. I'll lie in interviews and say I haven't listened to it, but I will because it'll be yours. You and the girls and Tommy'll go on tour, and I'll be there filming, and we'll try to talk when we can, but our schedules will get in the way until we don't think about each other all the time. I'll probably lose my mind because it rains so much in Ireland, and you'll go from selling out stadiums to crying at Sarah's graduation. And we'll both work way more than we should. And life'll go on like we were never really here," you say. "And maybe one day, when we're in LA at the same time, and nothing is stopping us and our schedules align, we'll get a coffee. And we'll talk. And we'll try again." You wipe Joel's tears away and try to keep yourself from falling apart. 

"I'll mark it on my calendar." He says, and you laugh. You squeeze his hand and nod.

"I'm counting on it, Miller."

You sit there for a few more minutes before you stand and hug him. It's quick. It has to be, but it's enough to settle your heart for a moment. Joel goes upstairs, scoops Ellie in his arms, and carefully carries her out to his car. He buckles her in and turns on the air conditioning so she doesn't get too hot in the California night. You stand outside, watching him be a dad, with your arms crossed over your chest. He shuts the door quietly and walks over to you.

"I hope you have a lot of fun in Ireland." He says sincerely.

"Thank you," you say. "I hope you have a great tour."

"Thanks," he nods. He looks over his shoulder to check on Ellie in the passenger seat before turning back to you. "I should get her home. She's had a long day."

"Of course." 

"I'll, uh... I'll see you around, okay?" He asks, and your heart jumps to your throat.

"I'll see you around, Joel." With that, he walks to the driver's side door, and you walk back toward your house, the space between you growing and growing as you get further away. Your chest hurts, and you know you're gonna go inside to cry some more, but you don't turn around. Not until he calls your name.

"I love you," he says from where he's standing in front of his truck. "And I don't expect you to say anything or change your mind, but I wanted you to know. I love you." Your hands are shaking, and your throat feels like it's tightening, but you manage to give him a weak smile.

"I love you, too." 

And then, he gets in his car and drives away with his daughter in the front seat. You go back to your empty house and your piles of stuff, and you cry, and in the back of your mind, you think, if I never speak to Joel Miller again, I think that's okay. I think it has to be.

#one for the money two for the show #rockstar!joel #the last of us #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel tlou #the last of us x reader #joel miller fic #joel miller the last of us #tlou au #the last of us au #I can’t believe I forgot my tags

[artdivadej]

Survivor’s Remorse (V)

Part 5

NSFW | 18+ | PTSD| Torture

Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8

I'd been sent to join the Victors Squad in the Capitol by Coin, not that the witch gave me much choice. It was obvious that she liked Peeta and despised me but wasn't sure he'd back her if it came to a vote of who to run a new Panem. I was the clear solution to that. Send the hijacked psycho to take him out because she can't control herself while so close to her torture chambers. The woman thought I was stupid but I didn't care. Anything to get some sun on my skin. Anything to breathe fresh air and get out of that fishbowl of a room I'd been locked in. 

When I'd been shoved out the back of the Humvee, I'd rolled onto the ground none too gently, but I was used to this type of treatment. I propel myself upwards using my bound hands beneath me, legs sliding out behind me in my usual protective crouch, right leg extended and left bent to my chest, hissing at the asshole who pushed me.

"You've gotta take her mouth guard off too Keil" Ryan sighs looking at him with annoyance

"I'm not going by that bitch's mouth. Let her new perfect Victors Squad take care of it" Keil snorts attempting to climb back in only for Ryan to block his path

"She's got a name. And she saved our asses. Twice. Show her some respect"

Keil looks like he'd love nothing more than to kick me again but he does eventually come closer and kneels in front of me, his curled lip conveying his distaste for me. I wish Ryan had been around for the first leg of this journey. Maybe Keil wouldn't have kicked me around so much if he had.

"If you bite me" he warns

"I doubt you'd taste any good" I snort, lisping around the mouth guard

"Pfft. Open your mouth"

I comply, having to fight the urge to gag when he roughly shoves the metal bar between my jaws, smirking at my look of disdain. I fight the urge to flinch, not wanting to be slammed onto my back again, as his hand comes towards my face. When he clicks them off, Keil holds them between his index finger and thumb with a grimace. I spit the bar out and flex my jaw, rolling my tongue over my teeth happily. I don't care how gross my saliva is to him I'm just happy to have control of my mouth again. He turns me around aggressively and shoves it into my bag before yanking me to my feet by my backpack strap. He and Ryan are behind me as we walk towards a large awning about a thousand feet ahead.

Then I see them and the blood in my veins freeze just like they do.

Katniss raises her bow, Gale his crossbow and the rest, their guns. Only Finnick remains leaning against one of the posts, appearing at ease while watching me with amusement. It's Peeta's eyes I find next and it makes my blood run cold. The realization slaps me in the face when I see there's not a weapon in his hands either and it's clear he's struggling not to come over to us. Coin really sent me here to die huh? No reason not to give the woman what she wanted I suppose. Who even was I really? No one of real importance now that my purpose had been served.

I hold up my cuffed hands as a sign of peace. Boggs comes over demanding to know what's happening. Keil shoves me forward with the butt of his gun so that I stumble toward them and I have to resist the urge to snap my jaws at him. This is humiliating enough. I don't need his fucking help in making it worse.

"Your problem now. Coins orders" he sighs happy to be rid of me

Should've let that fuckin pod kill him 2 days ago is what I should have done. Boggs assigns me a tent, telling me to set it up while he goes to confirm the order. Unlike Keil, his tone is soft like he's actually speaking to a person. Thankfully Keil and Ryan take their leave but I feel everyone's eyes on me, their weapons lowered but still in hand. Clearly, I'm not too well liked anywhere.

I move over to the outskirts of their tent circle and start trying to build mine off to the side of it. I'm aware no one will want to sleep near me. It's not personal. I'm just a fuckin wild nutcase and they're soldiers meant to be ready for anything. As the rope falls between my shackled nails again, I huff in frustration, knowing this was going to take most of the day.

I'm still sitting off the to the side fumbling with my tent around my cuffs clumsily when I hear a crunch behind me. My eyes sweep up fast as I slide my leg around in a circle out behind me so I'm back in my defensive crouch. They land on a smiling Finnick, his blue-green eyes twinkling happily, unlike everyone else's that only watched me with distrust and fear. I quickly relax and smile back at him, genuinely pleased to see him. Finnick was used to psychotic people, there was no judgement in his eyes as he knelt beside me, wordlessly helping me with my knots.

"Thanks Finn" I sigh once it's all set up not noticing his smile at my slip of the familiar nickname

"My pleasure. How you settling in?"

"Aside from everyone here wanting to slit my throat the moment I close my eyes? Peachy" I roll my eyes

"That's not true"

"Of course it is. Coin clearly has an agenda sending me here. I don't expect to make it back to 13" I shrug honestly "I'm fully aware this is the last stop on my Victors Tour"

I feel the traitorous tears burn the backs of my eyes; my throat raw as I shake my head to clear it. I feel resentment and self-loathing well in my chest. It pisses me off. I bite down on the core of my restraints giving a tentative suck. Finnick watches me curiously for a moment, allowing me to release it undisturbed. My body slumps a little against his, head lolling heavily on his shoulder. I can't help it. The sedative is quick acting, not as potent as it used to be, thankfully. I don't care that my sudden chomp has startled everyone or that I can feel them watching me warily because I'm so close to Finnick's neck. Finnick appears to be truly unbothered by my proximity or my antics.

"Like it's my fault I'm mind fucked" I hiss under my breath

"I have no plans of you dying as long as there's breath in my body"

"Thanks Finn but I'd rather you stick around for lil red. Wasn't exactly a cake walk bringing her to you"

"I hear you did a lot more than just protect her"

"Doesn't matter." I shrug

At least I made sure that someone walked away from this knowing and understanding what love is. Who they were. Knowing that when they need to break, they actually have the pieces to put themselves back together again. That was enough.

"It does to me" he shakes his head, leaning his cheek against the top of my hair

"Just be good to her. I tried too damn hard to bring her back to you in one piece for you not to"

"It's a promise"

I'm sleepy but I can't relax with all these eyes on me. I need a distraction.

Finnick taps at my cuffs curiously, so I lift them high for him to see. Beetee has made this set another pretty shade of blue to match the collar on my neck and the mouthguard now in my tent. My nails are covered because it'd been two weeks since I'd been around Prim to have them cut so they were sharp again.

"Doesn't it hurt you to bite these?"

"No. Beetee has put a sedative in them for me, right here" I drop my wrists so the cuff's center sits in his palm

It's fatter at the center with two matching holes on either side a soft orange, they glowed in the center.

"For when I feel myself losing control. After...I lost it at breakfast with you guys. He made me a new mouth guard too"

"I wouldn't call you attempting to air dirty laundry, losing it" Finnick chuckles handing me a sugar cube "It'll help wake you up a little"

One day I'd find out where he kept those stored.

"You weren't there...after. Totally lost my shit after I remembered some stuff about the Training Center. Johanna had to knock me out"

   ***

Haymitch interrupts at this. He'd come in after the fact but had never been told just what had set me off. He never pried. Always let me tell him things on my own time and the way I wanted. Another thing I genuinely love about my adopted father.

"What happened at breakfast? You never did tell me"

Peeta is shaking his head against the top of mine but he doesn't stiffen the way he did then. We've talked about this. Haymitch and I haven't. I take a deep breath and start in on that one. Might as well get some of the trackerjacker enhanced mutt version of me's memories out now before they threatened to smother me at the Capitol. Because I was going. I'll be damned if I spend that amount of time away from Peeta and they both knew it.

"I was cruel to everyone that day" I admit honestly shaking my head with shame "Most especially Peeta. I wanted him to hurt the way I was...even though I didn't understand it at the time. Still shattered beyond repair"

    ***

I was fucking starving and sick of waiting for Prim to go get some food. They'd finally actually had to adjust my food to meet my carnivorous needs and I was ravenous. I'd been allowed to walk around my room unrestrained and even get some sketching done this morning to test my motor reflexes further. They took my pencil immediately afterwards though. Prim was unusually late today, must have been put back in the rotation this week.

Yeah, screw this I'm starved.

I threw my pillow at the glass and demanded my shock collar so I could get some god damn food. It was still early hours so I was usually permitted to eat there with Prim because there were so few people there, already out for whatever work detail they were on that day.

Within 10 minutes two familiar soldiers came in. They knew better than to have my watch be men. They learned that lesson quick when I would tuck myself into places they could never hope to fit or reach. I'm much too wily and quick for their bulky bodies. These particular women were used to me and I liked that they didn't look at me like everyone else that was forced to watch me did. There was no pity in their eyes and they were genuine in trying to understand me.

The blonde was Flira. She didn't talk much but was the reason I'd been able to get my collars crafted by Beetee. She listened to me when I'd been a screaming lunatic those first couple weeks. It was clear I still trusted some people irrevocably. Beetee was on that very short list. Apparently Flira was a pretty high-ranking officer so she spent a bit of time with him for weaponry. Why she enjoyed spending time babysitting me was beyond my realm of reasoning. She'd attempted to put in a favor but he claimed I'd saved his life. Quite the opposite in fact, but I appreciated the sentiment all the same.

Now, since the last problems were my hands and teeth, a small jolt of electricity or a shot of morphling could stop that in a second. Much better than getting knocked unconscious with a baton again. I was grateful for them. They were pretty and functional without making me feel like the wild fox they'd wickedly dubbed me at the Training Center. Much thanks Beetee. A girls gotta have something pretty even if she was a monster mutt now.

In the red head Juni's hand was my collar and mouth guard.

Ok I hated the mouth guard. The way they'd strap me down to put it in always gave me flashbacks to my torment. It made me feel like less of a person to them too. Just some caged wild animal. I already had to wear the collar, was the muzzle fuckin necessary for breakfast?

I didn't realize I'd said this all aloud until they exchanged a bored glance between them before passing it back to a nurse who'd been nervously waiting at the door for me to be restrained. I shoot Juni a grateful smile and hold my hands out for my special restraints. My nails had been modified to always grow in a stiletto shape but Prim kept them rounded and short so I didn't have to wear the nail guards much. Today Juni leaves them off as she clips my adjustable restraints into place at my wrists.

Today's looking up! Gotta keep up the docile thing so it can stay that way. Lifting my chin obediently, I allow Flira to brush the hair from my neck as she secures the collar in place.

This one is a beautiful shade of blue that makes my head heart thinking about why I like it so much. Beeta making my restraints really makes me happy. They're personal, he cares that anything made for you is for you. I wish I could see how he was doing. Maybe if I behave today, I can ask? Pfft yeah right. He was important. I really wasn't.

I do hope I get to catch a glimpse of Johanna. I haven't gotten to talk to her in a while. I need to see her alright with my own eyes. Hopefully they were treating her right. I didn't want her caged and hurting like me. She'd had too much of it for my liking as it was. She was a bird that needed to be free in the trees, like Rue. They just flew through leaves as if they had wings, weightless and filled with sweet air. To think of her trapped in a white room like this, a two-way mirror for people to gawk and laugh at your misery. No, I wanted sun on her skin. It clicks that I have my bargaining chip. I have something I want from Coin now. Now we can negotiate.

"Ok, ok, ok I'm all cuffed up can we go? I'm starving!" I moan shaking my wrists back and forth as I bounce on the balls of my socked feet excitedly

"You have got to wear pants today." Flira sighs pinching the bridge of her nose as Juni takes the sedative shots from the nurse and shoos her skittish presence away. They always irritate her and this pleases me.

I'm not too keen on clothing but since I rarely get to leave my cage, it's not really that much of a problem. I wrinkle my nose but snatch up a pair of 13's ugly pants I'd shredded into shorts.

"No. Coin will kill you"

I snort and pull them up my legs, admiring how they make my fattening ass look.

"Not if she wants her precious mutt to cooperate" I sing throwing her an impish grin over my shoulder.

They roll their eyes at me but resign to let me stay shoeless and hurry me to the cafeteria, probably hoping we can get this over with quickly before their caught being so nice to me. I don't know why they risk it but I like that they were willing to get in trouble just to give me back some simple freedoms sometimes. Luckily for them it's practically empty but I don't really peruse the area. Not important right now. The smell of meat smacks me in the face making my mouth water instantly. Flashing my bracelet when the cook comes out, I practically drool at the meal he drops in front of me a minute later. 1 full turkey leg, a chicken thigh, and some beef soup that I can see vegetables floating in. My nose wrinkles at this. There's a cup of fruit that also makes me visibly gag.

Maybe I'll be able to convince Juni or Flirn to eat them? Food is too precious in 12 to waste but in 13 its practically a war crime. I wish they'd just stop giving them to me for a while. I take my cup and then seek out an empty table just happy to have my fill of meat.

Then I hear a booming, hearty laugh that makes my heart pound and my muscles constrict as if I'd been ensnared by a vicious anaconda. I know that laugh. Then, I see them.

It's the mutt sitting to the left of Katniss with Gale at her right. Finnick Odair is beside Gale, Annie tucked into his side, smiling adorably at whatever he's whispering in her ear. My eyes lock onto the cozy trio that Is the mutt, Katniss and Gale. His arm brushes hers occasionally as they speak to one another and I feel a thick disgusting jealousy welling in my throat that burns me to the core.

I don't know why I care so much but it pisses me off.

The bench of their table closest to me is full of heads I recognize too. Yulin on the end is sitting beside Delly, both District 12 residents. It's with a giddiness starting in my belly that fills me up with pure joy when I find exactly who I wanted to see beside Delly,

"Jojo!" I call out excitedly

Her head whips up as she drops the spoon in her hand, her growing curls make me grin as they bounce around her whipping face. It's Peeta who looks up first, seeing Johanna respond to a name that was most definitely not hers. When his eyes lock on mine I feel fear, hatred, jealousy and....longing well in my chest as his face frantically searches mine. It's Katniss' hand on his shoulder, trying to see what's got his attention that drives my feet forward. When Johanna turns around, I'm grinning wickedly down at her.

"I see they let you out your cage for once" she beams back

"For a little while. I can't sit without your permission though" I explain tilting my head behind me where I know Flirn and Juni will most definitely be hovering.

"Are those shorts?" she cackles

"No one was supposed to be here" I shrug, privately enjoying the way everyone's eyes roam up my exposed thighs, littered with fading bruises and wounds from my imprisonment.

I like that I can feel all of their terrified and confused eyes on us while we pay them no mind. All these scars? I earned every single one of them to protect all of their precious people. So... Fuck them.

Everyone else was all the things in this moment that I'd been for over 6 months.

Irrelevant. Discardable.

"Sit. Sit" Johanna pats the seat excitably and I plop down happily.

Flirn and Juni relax and give me a nice berth of space. I've talked to them a bit about my imprisonment time with Johanna. They know she can subdue me, if necessary and that I would welcome her over anyone else knocking me senseless. Or Primrose. But she's not available today.

I sweep my eyes up the table where Annie sits, openly staring at me with those wide jade green eyes, that seemed much clearer today. Good. She's finding her way with Finnick as her sound minded compass.

"Hey lil red" I grin, pleased to see her still unharmed. "You're lookin good"

"I am. Thank you for that. How are you?", she nods softly with a smile

This startles everyone at the table as they look back and forth between us.

"Meh so so. Best place I've been strapped down in thus far though" I laugh

Johanna snickers beside me and I'm pleased to see she's reaching for my fruit cup. After she dumps it into hers, I bump my forehead to her temple in thanks. She knocks back and I smile to myself. Jo knows I can't stand the sight of vegetables right now and she needs the fattening up anyway.

When I look up and a little to my right it's to lock eyes with Peeta. I'd wanted him to feel like I didn't care he was in close enough range to wring my neck with those big old paws of his or that I was truly terrified of him. I didn't want him to know that seeing him cuddled up with this girl made me want to rip my heart out and throw it at his feet.

I'm angry and I shouldn't be. I don't like this boy. Right? I don't want him. Right?

RIGHT?!

I look back at my food and pull another large hunk of meat of my turkey leg up with my nails, (I hate silverware) and can feel everyone's eyes on me, but it only makes me angrier. They want a show I'll fucking give them one.

"That's a lot of meat" Delly inserts quirking her brow at me inquisitively.

"Gotta catch up. They didn't exactly give us much to snack on when they were shocking our wet bodies with cattle prods" I explain in a bored tone as Johanna snorts next to me.

Annie flinches at the end of the table but I don't pay it any mind. She was fine. Safe and unharmed. I took great lengths and many an unwelcome touch to see to that. You're fuckin welcome Odair.

"But why meat?"

"All they gave me were vegetables the entire time I was there. The only protein was an egg a week. I need more protein than most" I explain to her genuine curiosity, seeing no harm in being nice to this doe eyed girl who honestly meant me none.

"Why?" Gales asks curiously, his stormy dark grey eyes looking me over like a science experiment

For fucks sake I'm wearing a collar. Does it need more explanation? I quirk a brow at him and pull my top lip back from my left canine since it was closest to his range of vision, fattening it a bit before tapping it twice. I hear everyone's gasps of surprise seeing I can change their size at will but I don't speak on it further. It's the only explanation I care to offer at the moment. I can feel them burning with questions but they dare not ask.

I dip my meat in the soup, making a spectacle of it as they all continue to watch me. A strange sideshow to their normally quaint mornings being all coupled up and fucking happy. Picture perfect fuckin families. Something that mind fucked little ole me wasn't supposed to live to see.

"So" I start, wanting to wound them the way they were me

My eyes sweep up to hold the mutt in my gaze, he's spell bound as I suck the soaked meat from my fingers and between my lips with a loud pop. I lick and suck the juices from my lips torturously slow and see that I have the rapt attention of every male at the table. Hmmm. Interesting. Even as a wild animal I was still desirable to them. Funny.

I rip off another large piece of meat and repeat this process. I hadn't had this much meat in so long. I was doing it just as much for them as I was for me.

"I see that you three figured out the poly dynamic to your re-lation-ship" I grin wickedly gesturing the meat between Gale, Katniss and Peeta before slurping it between my lips again, making sure to draw out the 'ship' when I pop my lips playfully.

As Katniss goes red in the face, sputtering for a response I lock my eyes with Peeta again, who looks as if I'd slapped him and he was trying to decide whether to hit me back. My fingers twitch as I try to control myself. I want to lunge for him before he can me but I decide to push further. Johanna snorts next to me trying to hide her amusement at my unhinged behavior. I bring what's remaining of the turkey leg up to my mouth to show them something I'd learned I could do with this new set of teeth and jaws the Capitol forced on me after my first games.

"So, Katniss" I hiss her name like a vicious snake. "Which ones better in the sack?"

Delly squeaks something about privacy and misunderstandings but I'm not looking at her. I'm looking right at Peeta, who's eyes have hardened. He genuinely looks wounded. Good. I hope she says Gale.

"Cuz if memory serves me right Mellark, you're quite a fun ride. And taste just. Like. Honey" I purr

Before he can retort I stick the entire leg in my mouth, clamp my teeth down and suck hard, my cheeks dipping so you can see my tongue hitting them as I swirl it around the leg. I pull it out painfully slowly and everyone's eyes widen. I've stripped it of every shred of meat on it, the tip of the bone leaving my full lips with a loud pop as I look him dead in his eyes and swallow. No need to chew if I don't want to honestly. I pop my lips with satisfaction and suck on the tip of the bone. Katniss looks like she'd love nothing more than to drive her fork through my face and I use this as satisfying fuel for my rage.

Serves you right. I volunteered for you and kept your precious mutt safe because he's so fuckin in love with you.

"I bet it's Gale and he's aggressive" Johanna whispers lowly in my ear so no one but me can hear

"How about it pretty boy? Is it you? I bet you're pretty demanding though" I tilt my head as I suck on the tip of my bone thoughtfully, rolling my tongue over the cartilage remaining at the tips. Gale's eyes are still on my lips and I taunt him further, beginning to suck it thoughtfully. "Hmmm might just need to test it out myself. Not like you were ever shy about handing out those kisses of yours back in 12 though, were ya?"

Gale flushes as many of the eyes at the table now sweep up to him.

"My bad about kickin you in the sack last time you tried though. I won't do that if you try to kiss me again" I purr dropping my bone and tipping my soup up to my lips, taking a sip. I drop it immediately when I smell carrots at my nose my entire taunting game discarded until I get them away from me.

I rapidly scoop them out into the empty fruit cup I had and hurriedly drop them on Johanna's plate. She dumps them in her soup happily, still watching our exchange.

I'm just getting fucking started.

"I mean. You obviously don't mind sharing?" I flick my eyes to Katniss and back again to Gale

"What makes you think you and Peeta have?" she sneers trying and succeeding to wound me, though I'll never let her know that.

I smirk, my canines on full display and this makes her pull herself back an inch or so protectively. I take a bite out of my chicken thigh and lick my fingers as if her question bores me. Just as I move to say what I want, Prim sits beside Peeta, who now has to slide directly in front of me.

I can't avoid his deep honey gaze any longer and I feel my veins thrum in warning. I don't want to be malicious with Primrose here. But now I feel I've gone to a point where I need to see this through. I genuinely need these answers for some psychotic reason. My foot rests between both of Peeta's under the table and a horrid idea comes to mind.

Let's see if I'm provoked.

With a tap to my temple, I simper at Peeta, biting my lip while gazing at him longingly beneath the lashes of my hooded eyes, feigning a desire that I genuinely felt licking the back of my consciousness.

"Hijacked or not, I've got quite a few nights on the train up here. And hmmmm...If memory serves, Mellark's fuckin hung" I sigh dreamily

He's about to get up, something in his expression tickles a memory of his mannerisms. I see it in the set of his jaw and the sadness in the tightening of his eyes. I stop him cold with my next action. My socked foot is now on his groin. I'd noticed he'd anxiously scooted to the edge of his seat while he'd watched me eat, his hands now palming the table with veins popping across the surface. His body is frozen solid. Good.

"And very, very vocal. Though not very nice in what he's saying" I sigh rubbing my foot tenderly against him back and forth, feeling a sense of triumph when he grows beneath my ministrations. This sickens me that I revel in his heat being directed at me this way. "Likes to let you take control so he can watch you too"

Desire sparks within me at his expressions. This mutt who wants me dead. The hell is wrong with me?

Katniss hisses and stomps away from the table, fed up with my shit.

"Then again" I sigh with fervor sweeping my eyes down to Finnick, who is watching me with something akin to utter disbelief but...humor rests on his lips "I do believe you owe me Annie"

Her head snaps to me and now Finnick is really lost.

"I bet you're the best at this table Odair. And seeing as how your pretty little wife does owe me my pound of flesh..." I moan the end of my sentence, just to goad them too.

I'm lashing out at everyone now.

I find Peeta's tip and squeeze, wrapping my toes around it, feeling his hips shift as he tries to control his reaction. I like this. Why? His plump lips part as he pants lowly, his hands are under the table on his thighs now. He could move my foot easily if he wanted but he doesn't recoil from my touch or move to toss my foot away.

This confuses me. I feel a crack in my mind but I don't have time to focus on that.

"What do you mean?" Finnick asks

"Oh, you didn't know?" Johanna pipes in always happy to traumatize people with Our 'Torture Tales' as we liked to call them. "She convinced them in less than a day that Annie would be of no use to them. Everything they wanted to do and try on Annie, she got them to take it out on her instead. The head Peacekeeper there had a thing for redheads but, she mind-fucked him into touching her instead"

Peeta flinches under my ministrations, I'd increased the pressure while he was staring at my face intently. But I don't want to see the disgust I know will be on his. I know I'm sullied beyond reproach, ok? Now both of my feet are on him but his trembling hands have moved to the tabletop again. Why didn't he just move my feet? And why was I happy he couldn't seem to?

"Is that true?" Prim asks me with sad blue eyes

"Mhhhmmm. So, I think I dare, Mr.Odair. It would seem I've got a thing for hot blondes hopelessly in love with someone else" I sing locking eyes with him, happy that these memories don't come back as easily as I spit them out. "We're used to it right? The Capitol just using our bodies how they want to? At least I'd be fun. You wouldn't believe the things I learned my body could do in there"

Peeta has had enough. So have the Odairs. And Johanna. Her hand is like a vice grip on my thigh, warning me to calm down. I didn't want to hurt Annie but I felt rabid and couldn't bring myself to care. I'd taken more than enough lashings for her; she could take one emotional for me.

Peeta's still hard beneath me but his hands slam on the table and I flinch backwards with my eyes on them. Now I'm the one frozen in place. They might as well be sledgehammers in my rattled mind. My own begin to tremble as I grab Johanna's hand in fear beneath the table. Ok maybe too far? He stands and his wounded eyes are hard as they hold me trapped in fear and something else.

"I don't know what you think happened on the train but that wasn't it", he hisses before retreating from the table.

He's a liar. He's definitely fucking hung. There's no way they'd just know that. Right? Or would I just know that?

No. The games. He had to have washed. Right?

Ugh. My head is spinning.

It's quiet for a little while after the Odair's, Gale and Peeta leave. I realize Prim has been watching me with the eyes of a doctor who wants to ask me things but not in front of people who don't have my confidence. Delly takes the hint and removes herself quickly. For some reason unknown to me, she touches my shoulder and gives a soft squeeze before leaving, knowing that touching me was not permitted. It was reassuring she cared enough to risk it.

Yulin finishes his food than comes to sit beside me for a minute. We were actually pretty close before I went into the games so I was happy to see he made it out. Friendship wasn't something that came easily to me. When his blue eyes hold mine, I realize he has something he wants to say without upsetting me.

"What?" I sigh ready for a lecture

"Look...I'm still friends with Peeta too. I know you don't like him right now but, don't just assume things. He's never...been with anyone before. I don't know what they did to your memories but he's never had sex" he sighs standing to go and fleeing the room quickly.

This only makes me angrier and I'm struggling to hold onto my reason.

I didn't need my heart to leap the way it did at the admission and breaking of Peeta's trust to give it to me. My head hurts.

"Why did you do that?" Prim asks amicably

"I-I don't know. I was so pissed off" I hiss gnawing at my chicken, no longer able to taste it but needing something to do before I splintered into a million pieces.

"About?"

"I can't explain it"

And I don't want to.

"Try" Johanna urges me threading her fingers through mine and squeezing twice, just like we did when we were imprisoned together. My little boost of dopamine in a world full of trackerjacker venom.

"I went through all this for him to have the life he wanted but I hated seeing it. But I hate him. Right? It's all so splintered" I sigh rubbing my temples now "I'm terrified of him. I just have this irrational fear but I wanted to touch him too. Fuck. I'm super fucked in the head. I want him dead. He wants me dead. Right? But I want his hands on me too? How could the train have been unreal? It's so clear. Bright. So bright"

"What about the train?" Prim tries knowing that trying convince me he didn't want me dead was a moot point.

"He and I... we would" I sigh, not wanting to express this to a 13-year-old, but she was the only doctor I trusted right now.

"You have memories of intimacy?"

"Sometimes" I huff as my body begins to shudder

"Only one time isn't super shiny like that but...we didn't..."

"This sounds juicy, tell me" Johanna hums leaning forward and resting her chin on her hands as she grins mischievously at me.

We'd always make one another laugh in some morbid fashion when we were imprisoned together and one of us was on the brink. I could have never endured all that I did without her.

"I didn't sleep well without him after the games...so, I never did" I sigh pulling my hands from my temples and holding Prim's clear blue eyes, drowning in their clarity

"And?"

"One night, I remember waking up to his lips on my cheek. I'd been crying out for him. I... I think I did that a lot. He curled up with me. Held me. He smelled different than the Peeta in the bright version.... like honey. Cinnamon"

"Like the bakery"

"Yes. Bread. Fresh bread"

This scares me. I'm getting too many at one time. Prim urges me on encouragingly.

"I wanted him to do more than hold me but I know it's not right to"

"Did he?" Johanna whispers conspiratorially as her pretty green eyes widened dramatically

"He's gotten...bigger than he was in the videos I remember. But he was always bigger than me. I wanted him to kiss me. I don't know why. He didn't love me. The cameras were gone. What did I want?" I grumble as my eyes dart back and forth across the table

"Oh my god bitch, did he kiss you or not?" Johanna whines

"Yes" I sigh as I feel my body clenching in a way that feels very familiar

"Keep going" Johanna purrs wiggling her shoulders

"He was on top of me. His tank tops always got swallowed by his muscles and his hands were" I stare down at mine "He always held my hands. He did it than too. His kiss was so passionate and he was everywhere" I whisper rubbing my temples again

I don't like that I can feel the heat of his body encompassing me or the tenderness in his kiss. This bothers me. Fuckin mutt. 

So desperate to have a piece of him, that I just let him take out his frustrations for Katniss with me. Telling me how pretty she was as he thrust into me so roughly. That was the truth. That's what happened. Right?

"He's got some big ass hands" Johanna observes

"But gentle in this one. I remember his hands on my ribs, my hips, his lips tasted like hot chocolate. He always...had some before bed on the train. I think?"

"That's really good, keep going" Prim presses

I don't want to. I can feel the golden haze trying to overtake this memory too. I tell her so.

"Why?"

"I hear things he's saying but it doesn't really sound like him. Like a track over the real words that don't quite match up to his lips."

"Listen to both. Figure out which one makes sense" Prim encourages

"He’s telling me that it's easy to forget Katniss with me because I had grey eyes and dark hair like her. These kisses are rougher though. He's tugging and pushing at me. He's rough and won't really look me in the eyes. They're off somehow but it's his voice. His body. It doesn't feel good for me but he likes it so I shut up like he says. His hands are on my wrists. Not in mine"

"What's the darker one saying?"

"He's calling me pretty. Sweet names. Whispering in my ear. He's holding my hands this time" I blush wanting to drop the topic now

It didn't make sense.

"Did you fuck in this one too? I like this one better" Johanna whispers practically in my lap now

"No. I... I touched him. He touched me, a little. That was it"

"Oh no, how much touching? Don't hold out on me now. I hate to read and this is a juicy story" Johanna whines as she shakes me

Maybe I'd make better progress with Johanna around when it came to my real memories? She made them easier to remember and fun even through the confusion and pain.

"Jojo maybe later" I hiss ignoring the creeping headache

Prim was still only 13 and it bothers me that she knows this much already.

"I don't mind" Prim laughs

"I do"

"Just keep going"

"I was determined not to, no matter how badly I wanted to. So, I asked to touch him instead"

His lips are on mine and the sounds that rumble in his wide barrel chest make me wet. He's so vocal as he showers me with praise between suckling at my tongue and lips. It makes my muscles clench in ways that set me ignites fire in my veins. I don't know how but he knows exactly how to suck on my tongue to make me weak. It's as if he has a roadmap to every sensitive part of me. He whimpers my name against my lips when my nails rake down his chest with desire. His lips leave mine as he throws his head back with a groan, hurriedly pulling the shirt over his head.

"Peeta" I whisper

His eyes meet mine, just holding them for a moment before he dips his head and gives me a tender kiss. His hands are on my ribs as he caresses my sides.

"Can I touch you Peeta?" I whisper into the night, my back bowing when his fingertips graze the underside of my breasts.

His eyes widen but he nods, his curls falling into his eyes as he tried to steady his breath. I want to see him come undone so I pull him down to me with my left arm around his neck and my right hand sliding through his golden happy trail. When his skin touches mine, I lay on my side, pulling him down so that he lay on his facing me. I could see him struggling not to flex his hips up into my descending fingers because his eyes never leave mine. He whispers how pretty I am as he pants against my lips, his voice unsteady and a low hum. I blush and kiss him to shut him up before I lose my nerve. As my fingers pass through the patch of curls, I wonder if they match the dirty blonde on his head. This becomes a fleeting thought when his length twitches against the side of my palm. I grab him gently at first, curious of his reactions to every touch and caress. He's pulsing in my hand as I explore his shaft in my hands. Peeta has no problem telling me exactly how he feels and I find that I really like that.

"Shit!" I hiss slamming my forehead down on the table before I feel Johanna's restraining arms wrapped around my shoulders to keep me upright

No. Mutt. Mutt. Enemy. He's going to destroy everything. But of course, me first. This isn't real. He'd never look at me that way. Never touch me so tenderly. He'd told me so.

He hated me for this fake relationship but I felt good wrapped around him so it was alright sometimes. His hands go to my throat when I ask him to slow down. He's hurting me. I go quiet but he's not finished yet. That was the real Peeta. Right?

RIGHT!?

My hand locks around Johanna's thigh in a grip that I know will leave a bruise. I'll apologize later. She doesn't flinch or move away; in fact, she moves closer so I can whisper in her ear.

"Se...date" I grit between pants

"Prim" she warns lowly trying not to alert my guards who've noticed the loud bang

Prim's hand is already on the remote. I feel the prick in my neck and I slump against Johanna's side with exhaustion. My doses are higher when I'm supposed to be around others. I want to sleep. But I can't. Not with these memories waging war in my brain.

"What the fuck? It was getting good!" Johanna hisses with mock irritation

I can't help the laugh that I choke out.

"Too good. I started to remember...the Training Center when I pull that one back up"

"Which part?" she snorts

"Mean Peeta" I whimper shrinking into her side feeling like a stupid child "Cliff too"

"Hey..." she calls lowly in a soft tone I've realized she only uses for me

I tilt my head up to hers with as much strength as I can muster, unashamed to show her my shiny eyes.

"Unless he's a quick pumper, which isn't exactly far off" she starts which makes me laugh brokenly "There's no way he actually got to you, y'know? Snow promised you to him after the interview. You fucked that up warning Peeta about the attack on 13. After Snow knocked you out, they brought you back in not ten minutes later. We were rescued a half a day later. They were on the frontlines. No one came to fuck with us in that time. I stayed up the whole time. I watched you the whole time."

"You broke your promise?"

"If you thought I really wasn't gonna need to look at your crazy ass when they brought you back, you're stupid. I know what Cliff does to the women POWs. I had to make sure you were breathing. They left you strapped down in front of my cell just like you said they would. When the grid dropped after they got bombed, I even managed to pull you into my cell before the power came on. I swear”

"It was cold"

"They took your clothes. They knew how much you love the things Cinna makes. And to make me think that you had been given to Cliff for a little while before they shipped out. I'm not dumb though. He likes to slice and beat a girl up before he can get his rocks off. You weren't bruised enough. Looked like they just beat you pretty good for the warning"

"You're lying" I begin to sob

"To you? For what? Your minds fucked enough as it is. I'd like no hand in that shit" she laughs and I join in, wrapping arms around her slowly filling out stomach

"Thanks for staying with me. I wouldn't have made it without you" I sigh sleepily, fighting my drooping lids

"Don't I know it" she smirks down at me, knocking her forehead against mine "Good. Your old man's here. Gonna need him to cart you off to bed. That meat's making you chunky"

"Good" I snicker

Prim has waves over Haymitch, who was looking for an excuse to ditch his next meeting anyway, asking him to carry me back to my room. More like my zoo exhibit cage. Johanna helps me turn on the seat, loosely wrapping my arms around his neck and back as he carries me piggyback to my room.

"Nice bruise on the forehead there darlin" he laughs around a lollipop.

A new guilty pleasure of his that helps distract him from the no alcohol rule down here. That rule definitely fuckin bites. I'd love a good drink right now.

"Had to hit something" I shrug with a yawn

"I take it you saw Peeta"

"I don't want to talk about it. My head hurts. Maybe later. I just have to sort it all out for a while first"

He hums but says nothing further as he waves his band in front of my cage to open the door. Once he sets me on the bed, he helps turn my body so I'm lying back against the pillows.

"Go ahead. I know they want you to strap me down"

"And since when have I given a shit about what other people want me to do?" he asks with a quirked brow

"True"

I roll onto my side and watch him as he sits in the chair beside the bed. It's usually occupied by the moron of a head doctor here.

"Can you stay with me until I fall asleep?"

"Of course"

I snuggle further into my blanket and just watch his chest rise and fall as he pulls a book out of his jacket and begins to read to himself.

"I'm fucked, aren't I?"

"Aren't we all?"

"You know what I mean"

"Do I?"

"My mind. There's no real helping this level of psychosis is there?"

"And what level is that?"

I hated when he answered my questions with questions like this.

"To see someone as a monster...but still want those same hands on you. No matter how terrified you are of the fact that you know they're meant to kill you. You want them anyway. Knowing it means your death. To find comfort in the arms of death?"

"Is that the crossroad you're at right now?"

"Yeah. I don't feel safe anymore. I don't know if I ever have, outside of the fractured memories that tell me I did with him. They hurt. It all hurts. What am I even still here for?"

We're quiet for a while before I begin to sob. I bawl so hard my bed rocks violently beneath me, my body releasing what I hadn't been able to in the last 6 months.

"I wish they'd killed me" I cry finally admitting to Haymitch the one thing I hadn't been able to admit to myself aloud "I can't live like this. Broken and fractured beyond repair! No one deserves to live as a shell. A ghost. A monster mutt terrified of other mutts!"

He doesn't say a word but his arms are around me in seconds, scooping me up, pulling me into the armchair so I'm sitting sideways in his lap. My sobs have only gotten harder and I'm barely breathing through them.

"That is not what you are! Do you hear me? You feel this way because you know that's not who you are! You feel her fighting, clawing desperately to get out from beneath the rubble of fucked up things that the Capitol dropped on you" Haymitch rumbles giving me a reassuring squeeze. "How about this? Everyone always wants you to pull your memories. How about we listen to some of my more sober ones of who you really are?"

"Yeah" I nod with a sniffle

So, he begins his tales. The more he talks the deeper I fall into the dream of living this girl's life as he describes her. The fire. The passion. Quickest to throw myself into the flames if it meant keeping those I claimed never to care for, away from harm. Alone since 8 but surviving on my own since 10. Preferring to keep to the woods, when possible, never was one to enjoy wearing pants. She didn't sound very nice but she was kind, passionate and strong.

I dreamt of her. In a field of dandelions, singing to the mockingjays above her head. The only times she ever felt free as a child.

***

"Ah. I always wondered what had happened" Haymitch nods before smirking at me

"That was not one of my finest moments" I scoff

"Sounded like one to me. You felt things you weren't ready to and tackled it head on anyway. Albeit, aggressively as hell but, you did it. Now, teasing the boys while you made your point? Stroke of genius" Haymitch chuckles

"I didn't even mean what I was saying. Like, Finn's cute and all, but in that annoying big brother kind of way. It's why I needed to apologize. I was trying to hurt everyone because I was hurting and couldn't figure out how to deal with it at the time. Nothing I was feeling made sense and it terrified me. It wasn't fair but I did it. It's why I had to say sorry"

"I can respect that"

"Finn's cute?" Peeta repeats above my head having apparently only heard that part of my spiel.

I shrink into his chest a little and nudge his chin up with the top of my head. Trackerjacker me tended to lean on Finnick a lot so we bonded quickly. I'd spent a lot of time with him. He was always nice to me even when I was losing my marbles. Even when I'd tried to kill Peeta again in the Capitol, he was soft in his tone and gentle in his handling of me even when I didn't know who or where I was. Used to it I suppose.

I later learned that it always stroked the beast of jealousy's back within Peeta back then.

"And Peeta is drippin wet, panty droppa, smoking hot”  I grin over at Haymitch knowing that Peeta is bright red above me.

He coughs and Haymitch hands me another clear liquor bottle to sip from.

"Finish about when you joined the squad at the Capitol" Peeta chokes

I try to ignore that he's dipped his chin so his lips are beside my neck and his left hand has released mine to trail back and forth across my waist line. I launch back into the memory before his hands distract me with hunger.

#i ship it #romance #peeta #peeta x reader #i love peeta #peeta mellark #the hunger games peeta #thg peeta #peeta hg fanfiction #peeta mellark smut #peeta mellark x reader #peeta my beloved #peeta smut #peeta fanfiction #hunger games fanfiction #fanfiction writer #fanfiction #fanfic #survivors remorse #the hunger games

[agent-barnes40]

Can't Catch Me Now

Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3

13th Doctor x Reader (platonic by Reader, Romantic by Doctor)

Dhawan!Master x Reader (Romantic)

The Truth Comes out

Canon Divergence

4,263 Words

The Doctor focused in on The Master, her eyes drifting over to you every few seconds. "How are you here?"

You had to bite back the groan building in your throat. You noticed Ryan watching and you smiled a bit toward him. "Doc, you need to take Koschei's hand."

The Doctor's eyes landed on you and you held your hand out. "Or you can take mine."

"Why should I?"

You pulled away from The Master's side and walked a small bit over to her. "Because you trust me more than you do him, and right now I sincerely think that it is in your best interest to take one of our hands."

"Then answer me this, how did you connect Gallifrey to that boundary?" The Doctor asked, focusing on you.

"I can't answer that right now, Doc. I can answer it later. Koschei's getting irritable and the human's lives are on the line." You snapped, reaching out to grab her hand, tightening your grip on her.

The Doctor struggled as you handed her arm over to The Master. "Do not hurt her more, Kosh. I will force you to regenerate."

~

You had walked ahead from The Master and The Doctor, taking in the destruction and view of the capital city of Gallifrey. You heard the silence behind you and you turned to look at the two. The Doctor was clenching her fists while The Master had a deranged smile on his face, like he was egging The Doctor on. "If you make her punch you, I will literally cheer!"

"Oh come on, love, no love for my destruction?" The Master called back towards you.

"No love for you egging her on. She can snap, and it'll hurt, she's incredibly strong." You said, leaning against a burnt wall.

The Doctor looked between the two of you. "What happened to you, Sweetheart?"

You shrugged. "Found out the truth, that's all."

"The truth about what?" The Doctor asked.

You didn't miss the look The Master had as you took a deep breath, and met The Doctor's eyes. "About me."

"What do you mean about you? Your human, you come from the planet Earth, Sheffield. You have parents. There is nothing missing from the truth!" The Doctor said, and you held your hand up, stopping her from continuing on.

"Yeah, that's what a perception filter and shoving my memories behind a very tight block in my brain does. Be glad I'm not like him right now, or we'd all be in a very very different situation, Doctor." You snapped, pushing off the wall to walk over to her.

"We are very much more alike than you'd like, Theta. Abandoned, shoved to Earth, and forced to forget things." You were in her face now and she leaned back.

"What do you mean?" The Doctor asked as you pulled back.

"Spoilers, Sweetie."

~

You watched as The Doctor and The Master circled each other, practically at each other's throats. "Kosh, did you really have to include the Cybermen?"

"Don't interrupt, love."

"Don't talk to them like that!"

You groaned and stepped up, pushing the two apart. "Lets start with me, and then get on with her. That way its easier for her to deal with one thing at a time, too much causes her to panic. You can deal with the Cybermen while I talk with her."

The Doctor watched as you diffused the situation and gently shoved The Master toward the arch way. The Master got ready to interrupt and you pointed. "Come on, Master. Just let me be the one to tell her this part."

The Master held his hands up and backed out of the room. You stepped back and sat down on the steps, running a hand through your hair. "Lets start with your questions."

The Doctor moved to sit next to you and she grabbed your hand, pulling it away from your head. "Who.. Or What are you?"

"I'm not human, that's for sure. Do you remember the headache I got?" You asked, looking over at her and squeezing her hand.

"Yeah, The Master caused that."

You laughed softly and shook your head. "No. That was the Time Lords. I'm from the planet Gallifrey, I don't know how long I've been on Earth, that got fuzzy."

"So you're like me?" The Doctor asked, tightening her grip on your hand.

"That's great! We can travel forever!" The Doctor continued, and you looked over at her, your eyes filled with tears.

"Doc, I'm gonna go on my own after this. I've got a TARDIS at my disposal, I can take it and go. We'll bump into each other but I can't travel with you anymore."

"Why? Two Time Lords are better than one in a TARDIS and I can teach you how to fly Sexy."

A laugh burst from your throat, but it was strangled and you reached up to wipe at your face. "Damn, human emotions. I always hated crying before."

"Before?"

"Back when I thought I was human. I hate crying." You looked over at her and she put a hand on your cheek and you smiled softly.

"If The Master had never intervened in my life, I'd still be stuck on Earth. O-Or with you. I'd be just as confused as the rest of them. I would've found this out with you, here. That was the original plan, according to him. He was never supposed to get attached, just keep an eye on me, to get me to you."

You could hear those familiar foot steps and you let go of The Doctor, getting up. "I was supposed to be in this machine, with you. We were going to find out about me and you at the same time and then he got attached. He knew about me the whole time, that's why I was tossed out of the car. That's why I connected easily with you. We are the same but different, Doctor."

"I knew you my entire human life. That mysterious man who saved humanity over and over, with his blue box. The Queen even talked about you. I wanted to be you! And here I am, on my home planet with no clue who my parents were, because of your stupid rivalry with him! The Master always has to one up you or hurt you in some way and I lost everything I wanted when he broke open my memories. I didn't get the privilege of the watch like you both got. I'm stuck with no answers while you will sit here and get both. You get to find out who you are. Have fun, Doctor. I'll see you later."

You kept an eye on the door while you held your hand out, lowering your voice. "I need your sonic. Hand it over. If you want the Fam to stay safe, then give it to me."

She quickly dug in her pockets and pulled out her sonic screwdriver and you shoved it into your pocket, right as The Master turned the corner and you gripped The Doctor's wrist and pulled her back up onto the platform. "Don't move, Doc. It'll be a bit less painful this way."

The Master cleared his throat and you turned and shot him a smile. "I got my anger out. It's your turn, love."

The Master walked over and smiled, pressing a kiss to your head. "My lovely, lovely partner. Look at you. All confident and powerful, holding The Doctor hostage. Could you ever imagine the power like this when you thought you were human?"

"I could've become an officer, like Yaz." You shot back, leaning into his touch as The Master rested his hand on your back.

The Master chuckled and stepped away from you. His hand slid away from your back and you stepped back. "I was thinking, I could go explore while you two hash it out. I've never seen Gallifrey before and I'll stay here in citadel."

The Master thought for a moment but you had already took off. The Time Lord shook his head and moved the communicator to lock The Doctor in place. "Paralysis field."

~

You took off through the Citadel halls, rushing for where that spare TARDIS was and hopped in, you ran off instinct, rushing to work on getting the machine turned on and coordinates punched in. You may haven't been human but the Fam were still your family and you weren't going to leave them to die.

You held onto the console as the TARDIS flew, and then you landed and popped your head out, seeing 4 Cybermen surrounding Ethan and you pulled the Sonic out of your pocket and pointed it at them. "I am The Doctor and--"

You stilled in terror as one of the Cybermen pulled their head off and Yaz had a big smile. "Hi guys!"

You took a deep breath and shook your head. "Get out of there!"

Graham pulled the Cyberman head off of him and the other two did as well and you laughed. Ryan, Ko Sharmus, and Ethan stared at you with uneasy eyes. "You took off with The Doctor and The Master. Now, your here saving us."

You smiled and shrugged. "Uh, we don't time for me to explain. Ashad's on Gallifrey with Theta and Koschei."

You could tell no one believed you and Ryan was the one to voice that. "How can we trust you?"

"Take my pulse." You said and held out your hand, showing the inside of your wrist.

"I'm a time lord, from the planet Gallifrey. I was sent to Earth when The Doctor saved my planet from the Time War and put it into a bubble universe. I do not know how long I was on Earth, but what I do know is I don't betray my family. My Fam, it took a bit and bit of help from Jack and The Master but I figured it all out in the end. Now please, please I have to go save the people I love and I'm going to need help because I don't know if The Master will stop at the truth like he did with me."

"Why the pulse?" Yaz asked and you chuckled.

"Two hearts! Double heart beats. Now please, help me save The Doctor. Please."

Graham had already moved to your side, nodding. "The Doc has always said to give second chances."

"They've betrayed us multiple times! We've given them multiple chances, what's going to happen after this?" Yaz protested.

You looked at her and smiled softly. "I leave. I've already told The Doctor. I'm hopping in my box and I'm gonna go, save the universe, something. I know I don't have a future with you all after this especially after everything I've done, and all the lying."

You smiled at Graham and started to move into The TARDIS. "Now, get in if you want to save the woman who can save us."

~

You rushed into the matrix hall, stilling at the sight of The Doctor on the ground. "Koschei, is this all from.."

The Master looked up at you and he held your stare and you looked away, feeling that familiar prod in your mind. "You took off, love. Took a TARDIS and took off."

You looked back at him. "Yeah, a joyride! C'mon, like your old girl and Sexy would've let me pilot them?"

You could tell you were reaching on thin ground and you took a step forward, looking down at The Doctor, before looking back at The Master. The Doctor had tried to roll to look at you, and you could barely keep her stare. The Master stood up and looked toward the upper level. "Tecteun wasn't the only one who could experiment."

"Master, what did you do while I was gone?"

"A whole new race could be created."

Your hearts felt like they dropped. "You didn't.."

The Master looked at you. "I did love, you're so smart. Now, lets have The Doctor catch up."

The Doctor just stared in horror as The Master smiled. "Time Lord organics, with the ability to regenerate and self-repair, Cyber armor. Invincible. The perfect army, right? Right? Come in my pretties."

You and The Doctor watched as the Cybermen came marching in and you had to take a deep breath, a hand shakily moving to cover your mouth. Thoughts were rushing through your head. Any of them could be from your parentage, any of the Time Lords in those cyber suits could've been related to you.

The Master pointed one of the Cybermen out and then pointed to another one. "Shoot him!"

The Cyberman didn't move to shoot and The Master angrily ran a hand through his hair, his other hand pointing still at the Cyberman that was going to be shot at. "SHOOT HIM!"

You flinched as the Cyberman shot and you looked away. The Master grabbed your chin and forced you to watch. The shot Cyberman glowed and then stood back up. The Master looked over to The Doctor.

"Behold, your CyberMaster's Doctor. All born from you and being led by me. How does it feel?" The Master asked.

The Doctor looked between you, The Master, and then The CyberMasters. You could only stare at The Master, as he pulled away from you and headed back toward the hallway, where you had left The Fam. You knew they could protect themselves. They can handle themselves.

"Can you both feel a new era dawning?" The Master asked, before disappearing down the hallway.

You took a deep breath and kneeled down next to The Doctor, pulling her sonic back out and pointing it up, trying to break the paralysis field. "You need to stay conscious, Doc. I need you. The Fam needs you. Can you do that for me?"

You broke the paralysis field and gently took her face in your hands. "I need you to help me, Doctor. I don't know how to do this all on my own, I haven't lived as long. I don't know how to stop him, I don't know if I've just condemned the last of humankind to die by his hands, I don't know if I've just sent our friends to their deaths by needing their help to save you. I need The Doctor. I need you."

The Doctor raised a hand up and pressed it to your cheek, like she had done just hours before and you smiled and sniffled softly, not realizing you had started to tear up. The two of you hadn't heard the sound of footsteps.

"Hey, you two." Graham said, softly and you finally pulled away from The Doctor's stare to look over at him. You physically deflated from the relief.

"Oh thank The TARDIS, you guys are alright." You chuckled at the sight of everyone, closing in on the two of you.

You, Yaz, Graham, and Ryan helped pull The Doctor into a sitting position as she looked at all of you.

"My Fam." Her voice was hoarse and you winced, you had placed her there, and didn't even fight The Master on that decision.

You watched as she started to jolt back to normal, like she was running on a whole new regeneration. Her eyes scanned and caught the sight of Ko Sharmus, Ravio, Ethan, and Yedlarmi.

"Are we having a party?" The Doctor asked before groaning and grabbing at her head and you grabbed at her waist, to keep her steady.

"Lets give her a minute guys. Let her catch up." You said, turning to look at The Fam, and then to the others behind you.

You watched as her brain was catching up, replaying everything that had happened and her eyes recaught the sight of The Fam and the humans behind you. "You guys shouldn't be here. No humans on Gallifrey."

"That's my fault doc. Needed all the help I could get. Anything for you." You said, slowly pulling away from her to give her more space.

Ko Sharmus shifted. "We have explosives."

You turned to look at him. "Is that what you brought onto my TARDIS?"

"You didn't complain then."

"I had a Doctor to save, okay." You shot back, although your voice wasn't angry. You had been massively distracted barely two hours ago.

Ryan raised his hand a little bit. "We have a plan too!"

Graham spoke up. "The Cybership's parked itself in the middle of your home town. Its ripe for blowing up."

"We're gonna strategically place bombs around the ship, including some close enough to the core." Ravio said, looking at the other humans.

You and The Doctor looked at each other. "Its a good enough plan, but the CyberMaster's will survive anything."

It was like your brains had clicked together. Ashad, something had to do with him.

"What did the Cyberman say?" The Doctor asked.

"'The death of everything is within me.' That's what he said." You responded back.

"But what does it mean?"

Ravio and Yedlarmi looked at each other.

"There's a myth around him." Ravio started,

"The death particle." Yedlarmi continued.

"The legend is: he, it, whatever, has, a particle, in a tiny chamber inside its chest. It will take out all organic life on a planet." Ravio finished, the two looking over at you and The Doctor.

"That's grim." Ryan spoke up.

"Or its a solution." You said, starting to get up.

"One of us can get him to explode, and it wipes out the CyberMaster's." You had cut the Doctor off, your brain already finishing on the plan.

"Only if you've got a way off the planet, before it implodes." Ko Sharmus snapped.

"I'll go after Ashad. Doc, you get everyone in place with the bombs." You said, rubbing a hand over your face while the other pulled her sonic out of your pocket, to hand it back to her.

"No. No you aren't." The Doctor ordered and you looked back at her.

"I'm the one who sided with The Master, I'm the one who let this get this far. If I can fix the mistake I made by trusting him, then let me. I get to save the fam, humanity, and you in one go." You snapped, turning to fully face her.

"I'm not leaving you behind." The Doctor grabbed at your hands and you took a deep breath.

"You aren't gonna leave me behind. I'm gonna be in your head, your hearts, and still in your TARDIS because Sexy's not gonna forget me. You have a whole new life awaiting you, Doctor, with all the new knowledge you have. You can go hunt down Tecteun, figure out what The Division is. I can stay here and finish what I started with The Master. I can end this for good." You squeezed her hands and then looked over to The Fam and the others.

"You guys get the bombs set, get her out of here, and make sure she doesn't try to come back for me." You said, smiling at them all.

You let go of her and stepped away, pushing the Sonic into her hand. "My TARDIS is where I left it. Get her to my TARDIS. It should register the danger and take you all to Earth. You all get a chance at life, a normal life in the 21st century and The Doctor can take my TARDIS to pick up Sexy."

You took a deep breath and started to leave the room when Graham grabbed at your hand. "Your seriously going let yourself die, for him?"

"I'm going to die to save you. I was one of you guys for what feels like a lifetime and I wouldn't change it for the world, I wouldn't change the year or so I've had with all of you. I know I wasn't myself for parts of it, thanks to The Master bein' in my head, but I'm so glad I got to experience it all with you guys." You squeezed Graham's hand, turning to face them.

"Now, as a your friend, I'm asking you to let me go. Let me do this so I can feel like I've fixed the problems I've caused, even though i know it wasn't my fault. You all are humanity's finest, staring in the face of danger and not moving. Humankind couldn't be prouder and I know The Doctor is just as proud. Now let me make my species proud, and avenge them because I don't remember where I came from, I don't remember much but you guys are my family and I would rather die then let you all die, and that includes you, Doctor. You are my fam. My family." You let go of Graham and took off.

~

You had found Ashad, just not the Ashad you were hoping for. You held him in your hand and sighed, shoving him into your pocket. You'd have use for him, you could just feel it. You closed your eyes.

'Contact'

'Contact! What are you doing?'

'He shrunk Ashad. I think he has the Cyberium, Doc.'

'Meet up with us, I'm sure we can all figure out a solution together.' 'Yeah, a solution where you probably shove me into my TARDIS and send me back to the 21st century while you die. I wouldn't be able to live with that.'

You stilled at the sound of thumping and rushed to hide, abruptly cutting off the connection with The Doctor and slid into a little hide away. You held your breath, a fantastic new feature you had figured out with finding out who you were, you had a respiratory bypass, meaning you could hold your breath for awhile.

You watched as the Cyberman went passed and you slipped back out, rushing towards the Matrix room. The Master was always planning to go back that way, you just had that feeling. You ran into The Doctor who grabbed at your arms, you just stared at her.

She smiled softly at you and pulled Ashad out from your pocket. "Go to your TARDIS. Now."

You shook your head. "No."

You could feel the emotions of the day building up and you couldn't stop the tears this time, as they built up in your eyes and you could feel your throat closing up. "I can't let you make this sacrifice when I'm the reason he started this in first place, love."

You shook your head again at her words. "I can't lose you, the universe can't lose you."

The Doctor's hand slid down your arm, to grab your hand. "Then you be The Doctor in my stead, you can go by whatever title you want, just keep saving lives. Can you do that for me?"

You just stared at her. "The Fam is waiting, now go."

The Doctor pushed you toward the TARDIS and you hazily, like you were barely there, stumbled toward the TARDIS and you barely noticed Ko Sharmus passing you. You slid into the TARDIS and started running on autopilot.

You directed the TARDIS to Earth and just stared. Yaz, Graham, and Ryan tried to comfort you and you looked over at them. "She let herself die, to protect me. She.. She took Ashad from me. I let The Doctor die."

Yaz grabbed onto your hand, shaking it to get your attention. "You still have a TARDIS, you can go back! You can grab her. Just like we did with that guy in space!"

"Its a fixed point! Her deaths have always been fixed points! You can't stop them without the universe flipping on its head. Its.. Its time travel 101, Yaz. I can't save The Doctor without destroying something and she asked me to live in her name! So I'm not going to do that. That's not something The Doctor would do. She would not want me to reverse her death, so I wont."

Yaz stared at you for a minute, her eyes widening at the information given. You just pulled your hand away before getting up, looking over at Ravio, Ethan and Yedlarmi. "Welcome to the 21st century, I promised to keep you guys safe and this is the safest I can get you."

Yaz pushed herself out of The TARDIS and Ryan followed, while Ravio, Ethan and Yedlarmi stared back at you. "So your The Doctor now?"

You shook your head. "Doctor 2.0. I'll figure something out. Maybe Doctor Disco? I dunno. That's the great thing, getting to pick your own name, you'll find one that fits right."

Graham looked over at you as you fiddled with The TARDIS, messing with the Chameleon Circuit, morphing the exterior to that familiar blue police box. "If I'm going to be another Doctor, I'm gonna dress my TARDIS up like Sexy."

Graham finally grabbed your hand, forcing you to look over at him. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, great." You responded quickly, smiling at him.

"Ravio, Ethan, and Yedlarmi are going to need someone to guide them through the next couple of months. Can that be you, Graham? Yaz is gonna be having a hard time without The Doctor and I don't want to impose of her grief."

"Well, what about you?"

"What about me, Graham? I'm The Doctor now. I have to keep going. I can't stop." You hadn't noticed the shaking and the tears before now.

Is this how The Doctor felt each time she knew she was the last of her kind? You barely noticed Graham pulling you in for a hug, just like you did what felt like months ago. You just held onto him.

#Dhawan!Master x reader #Doctor Who x reader #Cade Writes For Doctor Who

[sawixii]

i makea da other list. it's even longer this time

content: (everyone i didn't talk abt before lol) von kaiser, king hippo, bear hugger, soda popinski, bald bull, little mac+doc louis (and a random mention of nintendo's other forgotten fighting game ARMS)

art by @verawhisk he's so eepy here

von kaiser

erykah badu once said "totally underrated. i don't think people have dealt with his disability. the stuttering- it's not just the stuttering. something happened to him. i just don't think, y'know, people really cared a lot about it." and she was talking about porky pig but that is my feelings on von kaiser

BUT SERIOUSLY NINTENDO why characterize the second lowest ranking boxer in both nes and wii punch out as having uncontrollable physical tics who is also extremely tough on himself to the point of smacking himself in the head multiple times to reprimand himself???? i don't want to fight him dude PLEASE

he definitely wasn't in super punch out despite icon status because of all the young kids fighting for no reason?? like birdy mac is 17, heike is 19, there's a fuckin flood of 20 year olds. have you ever sat down and wrapped your head around the fact that aran ryan is only 23. his teacher side forced him to back off

his fight with little mac nearly got him booted from the minor league because the ref accused him of throwing the match by only throwing punches that mac would easily block. mac was really pissed bc he assumed von kaiser was underestimating him but he vouched for kaiser and kept him in the wvba. they aren't on good terms bc mac actually has experienced not being taken seriously but he knows he didn't mean anything by it. kaiser just isn't a cold blooded fighter

sorry all kaiser's stuff was so dark AGH i just have emotions abt him. kaiser knows the end of his career is coming around so he started forcing himself not to pick every fight offered to him and distract himself from the time the fight would be happening by exploring the city around him. he most enjoys finding new restaurants and eating with a friend, mostly joe or disco kid.

king hippo

king hippo fans pspspsps. i know it's hard being a fan of a character who likes eating. i was a niall fan i understand your pain

distractable. omg so distractable and so sweet if you're hanging out with him and literally anyone else starts talking to him he's gone. mall vendors love him bc he will hang on to their every word and walk away with thirteen samplings of perfume and two fruity isla paradisa colognes. this absolutely also applies to street animals

u: hippo stop it's a street cat it's literally hissing at you

king hippo: (making purring noises and slow blinking)

it's not that he doesn't talk, it's the fact that everyone expects him to, so he refuses. get to know me on my own terms if you want to get to know me then. nonverbal power

really enjoys being independent so he doesn't like to date or adopt pets but his yard and the area around his house is filled with warm hiding places for strays to sleep and he keeps a big water bowl cleaned and filled to the top. he tries not to feed wild animals bc it's a really terrible idea to get them dependent but sometimes the wandering chickens are too cute

VERY serious about pacific island animal care. his money is for keeping himself fed and for the care and upkeep of his flowers and beehouses. more often than not he walks along the beach all day looking for trash or an animal in distress

i cannot tell you enough what an actual angel he is to be friends with. if you're depressed in another country he's already on a plane on his way. there is no stopping him. hippo is inevitable

you'd be hard pressed to find a single person on his islands who doesn't adore him and light up when he shows up EXCEPT. the owner of a tourist dive bar called sunset chaser. when hippo was a bab he kept wandering inside bc it's right on the beach and has bubbly vertical fish tanks all around. at first the owner assumed he just didn't speak english, then around the 13th visit he realized hippo understood everything he was saying (mostly Leave Please You're Not Old Enough) and was just showing up at this point to fuck with him. long story short hippo started showing up during peak business hours, get seen by the owner, and get chased out laughing his ass off. he comes around now as an adult (and famous) just to order water and soup and leave (30% tip)

loves to make people laugh and often does it without meaning to bc he's so expressive. if someone is an easy laugher (coughdiscokid coughbearhugger) he doesn't even do anything he just sits there and side eyes them like a dog. and then when they stop laughing he starts giggling and he has a crazy infectious laugh so nobody gets anything done

bear hugger

if you didn't have a crazy uncle before you do now

has never taken ANYTHING seriously. his two goals in life is to laugh and make The Perfect Breakfast (so far it requires waffle pancake towers and at least a gallon of maple syrup)

he never gets mean and he doesn't raise his voice when he's angry but when he sees invasive bugs and lizards and all that he turns into THE VERMINATOR

i'm telling you he's out there with a little vacuum laying waste to spotted lanternflies. and his squirrel has an even tinier vacuum and they're laughing like maniacs. it's kind of beautiful

he's kind of. a terrible friend DON'T CLICK OFF LET ME EXPLAIN he loves everyone and is a great guy to know and will come fix your spark plugs if you're in the middle of nowhere but he kind of doesn't realize that he can't just go off the grid whenever he wants for seven months without telling anyone why or where he is. he was just raised to be self sufficient and solitary

wanted to be a mountie as a kid but he decided he doesn't like the idea of answering to anyone just to go out and take care of nature. he does that every day. and he'd have to wear a shirt. no thanks

completely out of pocket humor. "there aren't any wild rats in alberta. i have seen some pet rats though. 's like a rat police state."

one of the very few adults who aren't lactose intolerant and he LOVES milk. he drinks a whole canteen full of it a day to keep himself strong. everyone in the major league is frankly disgusted by this but he's never broken a bone in his life and he's fallen out of at least 10 redwoods. so who's really crazy here

soda popinski

trying to fight the "blunt russian" stereotypes but he refuses to learn any english words besides "yes." "no." and "i don't know."

loyal to the cologne he's been using since he turned 15. the company making it nearly discontinued it but his team arranged to do an advertisement campaign with him as the face of the brand as long as they promised him a lifetime supply. it's a very cedar-y smell with undertones of chrysanthemum

actually really enjoys taking pictures with fans. he's not super confident about his looks but it's the one of the only times he allows himself to smile for pictures. otherwise you have photographers assuming that you will smile for any picture when that is simply not true

he was so hot in his 20's. hold on let me find the image

he didn't like any of the attention he got so at 24 he shaved his head and started growing out his facial hair.

in general he hates being told what to do or being made a fool of. there's a reason he's in the crowd throwing bottles at aran ryan in title defense he got PISSED when aran wasn't fighting fair

despite this and the persona he adopts in the ring he is an extremely level headed and accommodating man. he and bald bull click pretty easily since they both understand how hard it is to shake a reputation of past aggression

soda's wake-up call to that happened in high school. he was constantly restless and getting into trouble with his teachers because he was struggling academically but could never verbalize just how, and with his authority figures when he "had" to fight his classmates in order to not look like an idiot and a wimp. yuh deep rooted resentment of authority

he has never actually drunken alcohol before. "vodka drunkinski" was an over the top joke name around the wvba's tendency to push boxers into stereotypes (his boldness impressed bald bull and started their years long friendship)

he would probably be really good friends with mr. sandman but the two are both more listeners rather than talkers so nothing more than a cool nod when they pass each other happens

he actually has quite a comedic social media presence. always slightly behind the trends but has a giant following because of that. he's like a russian cher

bald bull

hoo. bald bull in my mind lives a crazy life

the first boxer ever signed to the wvba and plans to stick around until his muscles give out. that said the same loyalty cannot be prescribed to the wvba itself

as a young man he was the golden calf. the cash cow (sorry i'm done) he was ready for the cameras at any time; he owned his angry and aggressive persona and he loved the public's fascination with his deadly bull rush. the name bald bull was synonymous with power, fearlessness, with the best of the best and with success.

when don flamenco was coming onto the scene, it was exactly the matchup both men needed. i mean, hello?? the bull and the bullfighter??? this was the fight of the century and the wvba didn't let ANYONE forget it

of course a fight is one night only, but good advertising can last a lifetime. (for better or for worse.) all the promotional material starts rolling out; bald bull's snarl contrasted with the young, calm, captivating don. there were photoshoots of don in matador suits, swinging the red cape with a proud smirk on his face, as though he had already won. as though his opponent were really a bull.

bald bull didn't need to be told who was favored to win. if the bull beats the matador, there is no cheering.

bald bull did win the match, though. handily. practically a massacre; don flamenco hardly threw a punch that mattered. and bull was right; the crowd didn't cheer.

he hadn't even taken off his boxing gloves before bull was summoned to be checked for doping. he had a nasty fight with the wvba doctor then; if he wasn't doping, why wouldn't he just let the tests prove him right? he seemed uncharacteristically aggressive tonight. maybe he should take an indefinite break

finally he defended himself hoarse; he took the blood test. no outside intervention. no apology. no need to push the matter further.

both don and bull's teams approached the wvba with the ultimatum that neither boxer would be coerced into any further matches, on threat of losing both of the fighters. they agreed and don flamenco and bald bull have not spoken since. bull specifically refuses to make any statement on the incident, while don flatly reiterates bald bull's expertise as a veteran of boxing, staying silent on any other questions.

that was, if you could tell, when bald bull learned the sticking power of an aggressive persona. his name is still synonymous with intimidation, power, and rage, though at some point the line between compliment and insult started to blend together.

he's extremely cagey about his real self, though being in the spotlight for so long has left very little of his public image to the imagination, and he's certainly much more irritable than he was as a young man.

he isn't all that he makes himself out to be, obviously. but there is no softer side that's yet to be found; he's just human. that means enough to him, anyway

if you were to dig deep in the youtube educational side (why would you. dork) you would find content by bald bull aimed at students struggling with physics. he loved science in school and was constantly conducting little experiments, and he was fascinated by physics. he feels bad for anyone who really enjoys science but gets held back by higher applications, so he purposefully shows any and every mistake he makes in the experiment to disprove that you have to be perfect as a scientist and to add a bit of entertainment to an otherwise pretty excruciating field

he's extremely well traveled, having visited every country in europe and nearly the entirety of asia as well. his parents believed the best education a child could get was through direct exposure to the real world. he would get horribly homesick and withdraw, dreaming of his bedroom in turkey until his grandmother gave him a piece of advice he carries with him to this day

he grew to enjoy travel, and whenever he starts to feel homesick, he bakes himself baklava. not quite how his grandmother would make, but it comforts him all the same

little mac

i know we all want the wvba to be besties but we gotta be honest at some point. it would be weird if this seventeen year old were just casually hanging out with these men who are on average three times his age

he's a good boxer (duh) but i swear i heard years ago that he was doing professional boxing in order to go to law school later on? pls tell me if you've also heard that i often feel like i'm insane. lawyer mac is so cute rotating him in my mind

btw i believe the name "little mac" being a pretty well known moniker being first used by nes mac, then snes mac and whatnot. i do also believe in mac's first name being macario though so i think doc louis just got really lucky this time around

he was a pretty unremarkable student in terms of popularity before he got famous but after it got so unmanageable he had to switch to online school thereby isolating him even more

he gets flustered so easily. he'll be jogging at the crosswalk with doc waiting for it to clear and then accidentally make eye contact with some guy and nearly slip on his own feet

due to my penchant for forgotten fighting games i also made he and mechanica from ARMS siblings. they both have celebrity crushes on ribbon girl but mac is a kid cobra stan for lifeeee

he and doc have grown inseparable over the course of his career. mac does have parents but he considers doc a father figure too; mac's family tree puts way more merit on chosen family rather than blood

speaking of family trees mac's is wild. he has family in india, haiti, the philippines, mexico, hawai'i, brazil, indigenous america, puerto rica like family reunions go crazy. he's closest (in location and by direct connection) to his latino cousins in the bronx and brooklyn so everyone just assumes he's latino. he honestly has no idea

however due to his multi heritage he loves tweeting once he beats someone. like when he beat don flamenco he immediately tweeted "that's for puerto rico"

mac actually programmed the training holograms as well as his own mesh hologram! he watches copious amounts of past performances of the boxer he's set to go up against and runs an extremely simplified version of their style and estimates how they'll deal with exhaustion, how much force they'll put into each round etc

#i kind of forgot who i was as i writing for bald bull. blehh #no thoughts only bull #punch out #punch out headcanons #von kaiser #king hippo #bear hugger #soda popinski #bald bull #little mac #see you in the movies

[ghostiiess]

[NSB HEADCANONS] - carving pumpkins with ryan

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧

pov: it's almost halloween and ryan bought two pumpkins for you and him to carve together and do the best looking pumpkins ever :)

warnings: some swears here and there

type: fluff

member: ryan nguyen (azngami)

REBLOGS AND LIKES ARE VERY APPRECIATED!

taglist! (Open! Send an ask if you'd like to be in it!) : @nsb-rkive @kentisbaby @firebenderwolf @hyuneee0 @yawnzzznnn @ghostyycat7

Bold can't be tagged.

so.. ryan was bored on a sunday afternoon

he was scrolling through his phone to cure his boredoom and saw an instagram post saying "buy pumpkins for halloween" (sorry i didn't had much inspiration for the add caption 💀😭)

ryan smiled and decided to go to the closest supermarket and brought two medium pumpkins for you and him

(More under the cut!)

he's just really creative

while you were doing your own things, ryan came into your room and smiled proudly of his projects that he wanted to do with you

"want to carve pumpkins with me?"

ofc, you said yes <3

and it immediately made him super happy

nguyen would have decorated the apartment with halloween decorations (i know ryan do not own an appartment since he's moving houses to houses with the boys, but let's say he have one with you lol) and spooky stuff around the differents room

i know ryan is a SIMP for christmas, but i also know he kinda like halloween (but not like he do for xmas haha)

ANYWAYS-

he would have put tablecloths or paper journals that you guys don't really use or read on your table to avoid a mess

this man brought even the little knife to do it perfectly

like.. this boy wanted to do this activity with you so bad

"i bet my pumpkins can be cuter than yours"

"lol, you wish"

"ooh y/n have some talk back? mmh i love it"

he smiled while saying that

"if you really think your chances to do an aesthetic and beautiful pumpkins are much higher than mine, then let's do a contest on our ig stories so the stars can vote. the loser have to do the dishes for the rest of the week and have to buy the other, snacks and drinks they want"

ryan love so much the stars

so you would agree to that challenge

and ofc, it would make him super happy

"alright, bet. we have 30 minutes to take all the inside out and we'll have 45 minutes to carve it. i'll put the timer"

"that's a serious challenge.."

"well yeah! if i have to carve pumpkins against my girlfriend, i better take it seriously. i would love to see you doing all the dishes and making me food" he said while laughing

he would definitively (try to) put pumpkin flesh on your face and on your nose

"sorry, it was too tempting"

he would laugh so much and take a lot of pictures

he love taking pictures with you

he love being loved by you <3

he would try his best to make you loose

"oh shit, yours is looking pretty sick.. mind if i add my little spice to it?"

"mind your little spice for later, i don't want to lose!"

"it'll make you win! you know how creative i am, right?"

"right.."

he would def carve something he found on pinterest or in google

' easy and funky carving pumpkins ideas '

" damn, these aren't easy! fuck that shit "

" i thought you were creative.."

"hey you, you know what, shut up, y/n!! mind your pumpkin!" he would say obvs laughing to make you know he's kidding

after that curving, he would be super proud of his pumpkin, but then... he would look at yours and be a bit jealous (just a little bit)

"woah.. y/n, you're really talented! it look fucking good and sick!! i love it!"

he tried his best

like literally

he wanted to win so so bad, but he know how great as an artist you are.. like, you could do whatever you want and it would still look sick and awesome

though, he would still be proud of his, he knew he wouldn't be able to win with your masterpiece

he would post a picture of both of your pumpkin and would add an instagram sticker with the choices (a poll lol) and would pray to win

he love seeing you winning because he can see you smile and can see how excited you are, but he still love winning times to times

after 30 minutes, he would check the results and see how he lost-

listen, he always thought you were a born artist, but he didn't know that his pumpkin was THAT bad looking?

ryan's pumpkin would probably look sick and super good, but you know.. the stars have choosen >:)

he was a bit sad, but at the same time, not really, because your smile when he told you, you won, was so worth it like?? his heart was filled with joy and happiness and excitment? ARGH THIS BOY LOVE YOUR SMILE SO MUCH

"i told you baby that i'll win"

he smirked

"yeah, yeah.. i guess, you're the real artist between us"

"don't say that, ry'! maybe you weren't born an artist but you're still good at dancing, at singing, at videos games.. ok, maybe not at smash, but still.."

"thank you baby.. HEY DID YOU SAY I WAS BAD AT SMASH?!"

"maybe, i did"

"alright, bet, you'll regret that, i'll beat your ass like i do every time when we play. you're going to be beat very easily"

then it turned into a videos games contest and let's say that even if you were trying your hardest, you lost.. sorry, not sorry

#ghostiiess #headcanon #headcanons #boyfriend scenario #boyfriend headcanons #carving pumpkins #carvingpumpkins #pumpkin #pumpkin contest #happy halloweeeeeeen #halloween special #it's not halloween im sorry but i wanted to post this headcanon #nsb #north star boys #northstarboys #ryannguyen #rynguyen #azngami #azn gami #nsbheadcanons #ryan nguyen #nguyen ryan #northstarboys x female reader #northstarboys x you #northstarboys x reader #north star boys x female reader #north star boys x reader #nsb x female reader #nsb x you #nsb x reader

[captainofthedauntless]

Tickles and Tunes

2012 Leonardo x Reader imagine

Info + Warnings: References this song. No gendered language, pronouns, or Y.N used for Reader. Set post S5, pre finale.

Commentary: Sorry for projecting my basic music taste on all of you. It will happen again.

"It was a brilliant solution!"

"Sure, sure," you said, walking into Leo's room. "But let's not act like Ryan had that planned. He's good, but he didn't even know that planet existed-"

"No, of course not." He followed you, taking your coat and bag from your hands and moving to set them on his desk chair. "But he adapted quickly, rolled with the punches. He had it planned by mid-episode."

"That's giving him a whole lot of credit, Leo. Just because you would have figured it out that quickly-"

"You saw his face on the bridge! He was cool as a cucumber. There's no way he didn't have a plan."

You smiled and shook your head, switching on his speaker. "Sure, fearless. Whatever you say."

"You don't agree?"

You glanced back at him with a smug smirk. "Let's just say I know what it looks like when a leader is totally winging it."

"And what's that supposed to mean?" He asked, playfully stern.

"It means," you drew out the word, tapping through playlists on your phone, "That I'm an expert on his kind."

"S'that so?"

"It's so."

Music flowed through the room, light and happy, just loud enough to make Leo's already nearly-silent movements truly inaudible. Luckily, you anticipated the way his arms looped around your waist.

What you didn't expect was his hand snaking up and taking your phone to move it to the desk- or him lifting you up a moment later.

"Leo!" You exclaimed as he quickly crossed the room to his bed and deposited you on top of it, prompting a little oof as you landed.

"Tell me, oh wise expert," he grinned over you, "Did you know that would happen?"

"No," you admitted, biting back a laugh and schooling your expression into something serious. "This is new behavior to me. I'll need to study it."

You didn't need to be an expert to catch the mischievous sparkle in his eyes as he placed his good knee on the bed and leaned down, boxing you in with his hands on either side of your waist. "You'd better be ready to take notes."

It was times like these that dating a speedy ninja had its disadvantages: by the time your clever retort reached your throat, it dissolved into shocked giggles- he was tickling you.

"Leo, Leo-"

"What, drawing conclusions already?"

"Only that-" you shrieked, squirming backward to try to escape his fingers- "You're clearly- clearly- evil!"

Leonardo laughed. "Interesting conclusion."

"Mercy!" You managed between laughs of your own. "White flag, uncle!"

He relented, stilling his fingers and moving to instead rub up and down your sides affectionately. "Evil doesn't usually respond to 'uncle'."

"Maybe I had more faith in you than I thought," you said breathlessly.

"Doesn't sound very scientific of you."

"It was plenty scientific. I knew from repeated experiments that you're a merciful specimen."

"So, not evil."

"Not evil," you confirmed, "Unless you're tickling me."

"Good to know."

You realized the song playing had ended. or, more accurately, the distinct opening of the next song caught your attention, making you huff out a laugh in exasperation.

"What is it?"

"The song. The timing of it."

The turtle hovering over you paused to listen, eyes shifting towards the speaker. "I don't think I know it."

"Ah." You smiled sheepishly, blood rushing to your face. "It was uh… it's… it's my you song."

That brought his curious eyes back to your own. "Me song?"

You nodded. "Yeah, like… you." With that, you looked away, studying the wraps on his wrist instead of his face. "Always makes me think of you. Has for a long time."

Leo crawled the rest of the way onto the bed and quietly settled down beside you- opposite the speaker.

Feeling his eyes on you, you hid your face in your hands, making him chuckle.

The two of you sat quietly, listening to the song play. You couldn't help feeling exposed; it was like he was reading your diary in the chords of the guitar.

When Leo finally spoke, it was to tease you. "… I don't have hair to-"

"Shhhh."

You heard him laugh again. His hand landed softly on your wrist, gently pulling your hand from your face to intertwine your fingers.

The singer finally reached the chorus, and you studied the cement blocks of the ceiling as the most damning line of the song played.

"Oh, I see."

"Mhm."

"I don't think I've dragged you anywhere head first."

You snorted. "A, you're taking this too literally. B," you turned your head to meet his gaze, "You absolutely have. Missions, obviously- repeatedly, okay- but-" your voice dropped, less confident as you moved out of teasing him and into something more serious- "Dragged me head first into loving you, so."

His smile took on a distinctly bashful note as his grin grew. "I see."

"Oh," you grumbled, looking back at the ceiling, "Shut up."

He did not shut up, but his voice did soften. "I'm not sure I did the dragging."

"I'm sure."

Leo pressed a lingering kiss to your temple, falling silent again to hear the rest of the song.

You could see him bobbing his head out of the corner of your eye, and suspected that if you actually looked you'd find that his grin was replaced by a much calmer smile. You did not look. Instead, you let your eyes slide shut, savoring the way his hand felt against yours.

You wondered how many times you'd listened to this song. How many times had you found yourself flustered by it over the radio? How many times had it been the background music to butterflies in your stomach and heat in your cheeks?

What would the you of listenings past think of this moment?

You almost laughed at the thought. the idea that you and Leonardo would ever be together had been almost forbidden in your own mind: he was the leader, he was a mutant, he was almost certainly not interested.

That last point had been proven incorrect.

Leo's voice pulled you out of your thoughts as the song ended. "It's a good song."

"It's a great song," you corrected, emboldened by your trip down memory lane. You had come a long way, the both of you. "It's- the lyrics always- they fit. but…"

"Hm?" he prompted gently.

Your new-found confidence faded again at the softness in his tone, at the way he rubbed a thumb over your hand. You glanced at him and found yourself feeling sixteen again, shy under his gaze.

To fight it, you screwed your eyes shut again. "It sounds like the feeling I'd get around you," you admitted quietly. "That fluttery feeling. The guitar, that sparkly sound in the background, the way she sounds giddy- especially at the end of each verse, how she like, raises her voice? Like she's excited?"

Silence.

You peeked one eye open to find him staring at you, a bewildered smile on his face. "I love you," he breathed.

You rolled to face him, opening your eyes completely and melting into his mattress. "I love you too."

He scooted forwards, wrapping you in his arms and tossing a knee over your own while pressing a smiley kiss to your forehead. "That was the cutest thing anyone's ever said to me."

You found yourself without a response.

Instead, you wrapped an arm over his shell, bringing your other hand to trace his jaw.

"I should show you my you song some time, huh?"

Your eyebrows shot up and Leo laughed. "You have a me song?"

"What, you think you're the only one that listens to music?"

"No," you huffed, struggling to put your question into words. "But… me?"

You were almost overwhelmed by the answer in his eyes, by how much love was visible- how much was directed at you. "Of course, you," he mumbled, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. Then, impossibly quiet, "Of course it's you."

Your shriek of laughter echoed through the lair, followed by Leonardo's quieter but no less genuine chuckle, and Raph felt Casey glance at him. "Dude, I can't remember the last time I heard them laugh like that," Casey said quietly. "Didn't know Leo even remembered how."

April hummed from the beanbag chair in front of them. "I think it's nice."

"Nice and loud, maybe," Raph mumbled, his words lacking any real bite. "Can barely hear the TV over all that."

"You should try watching Crognard when Mona's over." Casey threw his voice up into a high pitched squeak. "Oh, mona, you're so cool, I may faint-"

Raphael tossed a pillow at him, satisfied by the whump of it hitting him in the face and knocking him sideways onto the couch. "Shuddup already, will ya?"

April and Casey laughed, and Raph barely managed to bite back his own grin. He wouldn't say it out loud, but it had been nice to hear Leo goofing off- add the mention of his own girlfriend and the delight of hitting Casey with something and you had the start of a great mood.

#*writing #leonardo #leonardo x reader #tmnt 2012 x reader #tmnt x reader #tmnt oneshot #2012 #imagines

[bellaramslover]

My Perfect Girl

Word Count: 1.2k

Summary: your friends leave you feeling more insecure than you already were, but Ellie comforts you and yells at your dickhead friends

Cw: body insecurity, mentions of feeling/being fat+ugly, troubles eating

You struggled to breathe as you lied in bed curled into a ball, crying your eyes out. Your crying fit had been a result of a rather hurtful conversation with your "friends." Your body faced the wall as tour hands came to cover your face, your palms wetting with tears. Time passed, you didn't know how much, but you'd heard a voice behind you and the bedroom door creaking open.

"Baby? What's going on, what happened?" Ellies voice was laced with concern and worry as she rushed to your side, rubbing your back.

You sniffled as you turned to face her, tears still streaming down your face as you picked up your phone and opened up your grouochat then handing it to her. Your breaths were ragged and quick as you watched her read, hee brows furrowed in worry quickly arched with anger as she did.

Y/n: guys I feel like I look bad today *image attached*

Ryan: wdym

Rosa: yeah u look the same lol

Y/n: idk like I feel ugly and like fat :(

Ryan: I don't see any difference 💀

Rosa: ong you look like u always do

Ryan: yeah ur just being dramatic lmao

Rosa: she probably just wants attention to be really honest

Ryan: omg you're right tho, fishing for compliments haha

Y/n: guys stop I'm not kidding.

Ryan: come on yk were right

Rosa: yeah just calm down bro

Y/n: whatever I'm done talking to you guys.

"What the fuck." Ellie muttered under her breath.

"Ellie, I look terrible and they're just making fun of me." Your bottom lip quivered.

"Baby, you don't. I promise they're just being assholes for no reason." She tried to reassure you, rubbing at your arm up and down.

You turned away from her, facing the wall again as you cried harder. You couldn't believe a word she said, you just felt insecure. It wasn't the first day you've felt like this, but it never got easier. It was days like these where you couldn't even bring yourself to look in the mirror, shower, or take care of yourself in general.

She let out a deep sigh, bringing a hand to rub your back gently, occasionally combing through your hair with her fingers. She looked at your phone again, then stood to leave the room.

"I'm gonna talk to them." She stated before exiting and calling the group.

Your friends picked up and were confused, seeing Ellies face instead of your own. It's not like they didn't recognize your girlfriend, but they wondered why she was the one calling them.

"Oh hey Ellie." Ryan greeted with a smile.

"Hi. So what the fuck is wrong with you guys?"

Rosa laughed a bit, her brows furrowing.

"What are you talking about?" She asked.

"Whyd you guys say that shit to Y/n? Seriously what kind of fucking friends are you?" She asked in return, as if it was obvious.

"Oh come on, she knows we were kidding!" Ryan argued.

"Yeah, she's probably being dramatic anyways." Rosa chimed in.

"I bet you're only asking because she told you to." Ryan spoke smugly.

"Um, no actually I'm asking because clearly she's upset and you guys are just being assholes. And if she knows you were joking why'd I come home to her crying, hm? Terrible fucking jokes by the way." Ellie argued, feeling angrier at your friends poor reactions.

"She was crying? Oh shit, sorry." Suddenly Ryan seemed to feel bad.

"Yeah you fuckin should be, she's probably gonna be worked uo for days now. Great fucking job you two." And with that Ellie hung up, as she couldn't bear to speak to them any longer.

She shut off your phone and set it at the bedside table, sitting down and glancing over at you as you let out a heavy sigh. You silently cursed as your stomach grumbled.

"Babe, you hungry?" Ellie asked, leaning down to rest her chin on your shoulder.

"No." You lied, shaking your head.

"Ok, well have you eaten today?" She asked, already sure she knew the answer.

"No." You were quiet now, feeling ashamed at your inability to care for yourself, how you know you should be.

"Alright well come on then, let's put something in that belly of yours." She tried to turn you around, take you to the kitchen.

But you wouldn't budge, tears falling from your eyes once again as you shook your head furiously.

"No! I-I'm already fat enough I don't need to eat anymore!" You protested, believing everything you said.

"What? Stop it, that's nonsense and you know it. Come on, just come have something. Please." She frowned as she held your hands in her own, it hurt her to see you so upset.

"I can't." You choked out and she pulled you into a hug.

You immediately leaned into her relaxing touch, wrapping your arms around her back as you nuzzled your head into her shoulder.

"Baby, you can. I know you can, you're stronger than you think. And your body is perfect" She pulled away, holding your face in her hands as she peppered kisses over your face, "I love every part of it, and you. You're amazing and your brain is just lying to you." She reminded you.

"Love you too." You responded, sniffling and leaning your forehead against her own.

You finally followed her to the kitchen, still hesitant but you'd get past that. You sat at the table and watched as she made pasta for the two of you, mainly because she knew it was your comfort food. A smile made its way to your face as she brought over two bowls, giving on to you. Ellie smiled ten times as big as you did, rubbing her thumb over your cheek fondly. It made her happier than anything to see you smiling after you'd had such a tough time that day.

Once you finished eating, Ellie insisted on doing the dishes. You felt bad for not helping out, but she reassured you that she was more than happy to do it herself. She told you to go sit down and pick a movie, and of course you did.

You'd selected something happier, usually you two watched horror together but tonight you just didn't feel like it. You sat with your knees pulled to your chest, a fuzzy blanket engulfing you as you waited for your girlfriend. She was sitting beside you in no time, pulling you into her side. You hummed contently, leaning into her touch with a smile as you leaned your head on her shoulder.

About halfway through the movie, Ellie placed a kiss to your forehead then placed a hand on your chin to make you look at her.

"Is my girl finally feeling better?" She asked.

"Mostly, thank you for helping me." You smiled before leaning in to give her a kiss.

"Of course Baby. You tired yet?" She asked, looking at her watch and noting that it was getting late.

You just nodded before placing your head back on her shoulder and closing your eyes. She chuckled a bit at you, rubbing your side lovingly then letting her head fall against your own as she waited until you fell asleep before carrying you into your shared bedroom. She laid you down then climbed in next to you, pulling you in. You let out a small groan as you hiked your leg over her own, wrapping your arm around her stomach.

A/n: sorry ik it's kinda short! Hope u still liked tho :)))

#ellie williams #ellie x y/n #ellie x reader #ellie x you #ellie williams x y/n #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x you

[lowkeyerror]

Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better

Quinn Fabray x Reader

Word Count: 2.1k

Warnings: Forced outting

Summary: As Rachel Berry's sister you naturally get fed up with her big ego. You finally decide to knock her down a couple pegs. ( Not my gif)

Pt2

Masterlist

If you were a character in a movie, you'd be Ryan Evans from Kenny Ortega hit teen movie series High School Musical. There were a few things that made you akin to Ryan Evans.

The first connection was your sister, Rachel Berry. She had to be the focal point of everything she did. All she wanted to do was be in the spotlight at any possible expense. Whether you liked it or not, you'd be a part of that journey.

The second was that you were incredibly gay. Which meant that you had to be hopelessly in love with a girl that wasn't interested in you; Quinn Fabray.

" Alright, everybody, this week's lesson is a classic; duets. As always, winners get a free dinner at Breadsticks."

Rachel raises her hand," Mr. Schue, is this the time you finally let us pick our own partners? Because if not, I think I'd like to campaign to have either Finn or Y/n as my partner."

" What a big surprise?" Santana mocks her.

" Unfortunately Rachel, you won't be picking your partners, but neither will I. It's up to fate," he brought out a fedora and the whole class groaned.

Rachel was already bolting out of her seat and confidently reaching her hand in the hat. She pulled out the piece of paper and smiled widely," Finn, I guess fate is on my side."

" Who's next?"

Quinn stood in her cheerios uniform, volunteering herself. She pulled a name out of the hat and locked eyes with you," I got Berry, the better one."

You could hear Rachel huffing besides you as Finn said something to defend his girlfriend. However, you didn't really care, your mind was racing. You'd be doing a duet with Quinn, and that's the only thing you could focus on.

Everyone picked partners and kind of broke off into those pairs. You slowly made your way to Quinn, taking a seat next to her.

" So, what were you thinking for our duet?"

You shrugged," Whatever you want is fine."

Quinn chuckles dryly," Let me guess, Rachel usually chooses, and you just sing along."

She wasn't saying it as an insult, just an observation," Ya usually."

" Well, then maybe it's time for you to take advantage of not working with her. You take the lead, and I'll follow," Quinn looks at you, awaiting your response.

" I- uh okay? It would be easier to pick a song that already has two parts…"

" But that doesn't sound like what you want to do," Quinn interjects.

You laugh a little," I don't think so. I want something that fits both of our styles, and we could definitely incorporate some choreo. How do you feel about Billie Eilish?"

" Billie Bossa Nova?"

Your eyes light up," Ya, it's a cute, soft song. It matched well, and we can definitely throw in some like salsa moves or something."

Quinn starts humming the melody of the song, and you feel yourself melting," You're a genius Y/n."

" I don't know about all that, but we can practice at my place. Finn and Rachel will probably take over upstairs, but that's what the downstairs den is for. Does tomorrow work for you?"

" It's a date, Berry. See you then," Quinn winks at you before leaving the room.

You couldn't leave until Rachel was ready. On the way home, she was going on a mile a minute about her and Finn's duet.

" So what about you and Quinn?"

You blinked a few times before parking the car in front of your house," We have the song, we just need to arrange it and figure out some choreo."

Rachel makes a face," Well, I suppose as long as a Berry wins, we'll both be winning."

She got out of the car, and for once you stormed after her," What is that supposed to mean?"

" Nothing, nothing, it's just you know. Some of us are more prepared for these things than others."

You rolled your eyes," You don't think I can beat you, do you?"

Her eyes widened," Well, I- I never said that."

You laugh," You're so full of yourself, Rachel, I swear. We have the same DNA, the same training, the same routine, the same upbringing."

" You may have all of that, but I have a natural star power that we both know you don't have."

You glared at your sister," Tomorrow, me and you, diva off during glee club."

" If you want to embarrass yourself in front of everyone, be my guest," Rachel says.

" Anything You Can Do, Annie Get Your Gun."

Rachel smiles," You don't have the voice."

" We'll see," you leave her with that, headed straight for the den downstairs.

" That didn't sound too good, sweetheart," your dad's voice catches you off guard.

" It's just Rachel being herself," you plop down on the couch.

He pushes up his glasses," She doesn't mean it."

You shake your head," Oh no, but she does. She thinks she's so much better than me, and tomorrow I'll prove to her just how much of the spotlight I let her have."

Hiram looks pensive for a moment," It won't hurt her to be humbled, I suppose. She gets it from your dad."

You laugh at his words," I'll beat her in the diva off and then Quinn and I will wipe the floor with her and Finn. She'll be feeling humble for weeks to come."

The news of the diva off had spread quickly through the glee club. The next day at school, you had everyone bombarding you about it.

" So you're finally standing up to her. I know that's right Y/n, knock her down a few pegs," Mercedes strides by your side in the hallway.

" It's about time off brand Barbara learned a thing or two, especially from you," Santana popped up on your other side.

Brittany was attached to her hip," A Berry fight to the death. There can only be one winner."

You laughed at the blonde's words. It was then you saw Finn, Rachel, Kurt, and Blaine across the hall. You had no nerves, you knew that you could beat Rachel.

Quinn stepped into your viewpoint, gaining your attention," Is it true about the diva off?"

You nodded," It's time the better Berry finally lived up to the nickname."

The cheerio's hand slid across your shoulder," I'm rooting for you," then she continued down the hall.

As soon as school was over, you headed straight for glee club. The students there were already taking bets on who would win. Rachel was already there, so you deliberately sat as far away from her as possible.

Mr. Schue walked in the classroom," So, I heard we had a little diva off slash duet happening today. The Berry sisters are going to show us how it's done."

" I hate to say it, but Rachel is going to destroy Y/n," Artie said, and a few murmurs of agreement were heard. Rachel plastered a big smug smile on her face at the reaction.

" Artie, when I win, I expect an apology," you stood up from your seat and approached the middle of the room.

Rachel strutted her way down the stairs and stopped in front of you.

A chorus of Oooo's rang out, but you didn't let them bother you. It was your time to shine and for once, you wouldn't be overpowered by your sister.

Rachel started the song, as she always did. You followed impeccably. The fun of the song was definitely gone for the both of you. It was heated, and the glee club seemed almost shocked by your voice.

Rachel herself even seemed to underestimate you. She hit the high note flawlessly in the first verse, but you took over the long note in the second verse.

You found yourself one upping her basic choreography. Each step she did, you did, but elevated. That was the case until you did a flip off the stairs, which she couldn't possibly follow.

She tried to outbelt you on the last note, but instead of playing her game, you flipped it on her. Finishing the song in true Berry fashion with a huge high F at the end, just because you knew it would make her angry.

By the end of the song, you and Rachel were on opposite sides of the room. It seemed like you and Rachel were getting closer as the final notes came to an end.

Once the music cut, the two of you were standing face to face, breathing heavily. Rachel's eyes wide from your last note. The classroom was silent.

Then Artie spoke up," Y/n, I am so sincerely sorry."

That's when they broke out into cheers. Even Mr. Schue was stunned at your musical prowess.

" Y/n, oh my god. Where have you been hiding that voice?"

You smugly turn to your sister," Behind her massive ego."

" My performance was better than yours, and you know it," Rachel snarled at you.

" I hate to be the one to tell you this… wait, never mind I don't. It wasn't even close," a wicked grin takes over your features.

Rachel looks around the classroom for anyone to back her up, but no one meets her eyes, not even Finn.

" I-I'm a natur-"

" Natural talent? Then why are you so insecure, Rachel? You sent Sunshine to a crack house, you act like solos are a birthright, and then act like you've done them a favor when anyone else gets one, hell I know for a fact that Kurt can hit the high F just like I did. Everyone is letting you act like this because they don't care enough to shut you up."

Tears brim her eyes for a moment, but they stop as soon as they land on you. There's a new glare in her eyes, one full of malice and hatred," Oh, are we having truth time?"

Mr. Schue tries to cut her off," Hey guys, enough."

Rachel doesn't stop," Oh no, no, no, if she wants to embarrass me, I can embarrass her back. You're a lesbian, and you're in love with Quinn. Newsflash, she'll never love you back."

Your heart dropped when your sister spoke. She just outed you to the entire glee club.

" Rachel, that was low."

You didn't know who said it. Part of you hoped to never know. You didn't give her the satisfaction of running out of the classroom. So you calmly walked out, but before you left you looked at her with the coldest stare you could muster," You are the most heartless, self-centered, bitch I've ever met in my life. You aren't my sister, you're a fucking parasite."

You walked out after that.

The body tends to act on its own when in shock or traumatized. Your feet carried you to the top of the bleachers. The sunset from the field was beautiful. It's not until you let out a scraggly breath that you realized you were crying.

It hit you harshly. Your body began to shake as choked sobs came out of your mouth. With your elbows resting on your knees, your head fell into your hands.

" I knew it would be intense, but not like that."

You raised your head to see the captain of the cheerios.

" Oh baby," she sat down next to you and draped an arm over your shoulder. She made your head lean on her shoulder.

" I'm sorry," you don't know what compelled you to say it.

" Don't ever apologize for who you are," you stay silent," I like you like this."

Her thumb delicately wipes the tears from your face.

" You don't have to say that, Quinn."

Her thumb tilts your chin up," I mean it."

Quinn doesn't let any more time pass. She places her lips firmly against yours. Nothing, but certainty, in her movements.

It was a mixture of your salty tears and her cherry lip balm. You wanted to savor every second of it, just in case this was a dream.

When she stopped, you were warm like the sunset.

" Are you sure about this? You're already in the glee club, won't this ruin your reputation?"

Quinn kisses your forehead," I'm not Rachel, I don't care about my reputation more than I care about you."

You chuckle bitterly," Dinner is going to be awkward tonight."

" Am I still invited?"

You nod," I could definitely use the support with Rachel and Finn there."

Her fingers intertwined with yours," Well then I'm here for you."

You squeeze her hand," Thank you."

She kisses the back of your hand. The sunset illuminates the two of you on the bleachers. You'd probably never forgive Rachel, but this moment with Quinn almost made you want to thank her. Almost being the key word.

#lowkeyerror #quinn fabray x reader #quinn fabray #Quinn Fabray imagine #glee imagine #rachel berry

[kendrixtermina]

Giving Doctor Who a New Chance, Part 1: The Star Beast

I like how in the opener the Doctor ends up running into Donna due to plain old Chronic Hero syndrome, rushing towards someone who looks like they needed help

I appreciate that we got a realtime example of Donna just missing a spaceship

her concern with stacking properly is a good establishing moment for viewers who maybe don't know her yet

It's interesting how Donna ended up giving away the money - not doing what he thought she would do

Making Donna's kid trans was a great move now that the UK is known as a rather trans-hostile place

sylvia is interesting - she seems like someone who feels guilty but is sort of going overboard with overcompensating for it rather than truly helping

badass protective - which is probably how Donna would be as a mom, some of the character development stuck despite the memory wipe, small-minded

Another Unit Scientific Advisor!

You can tell the Doctor is having a tough time with how he spills his problems to the Unit lady. Though you can also see 14 isn't quite like 10, not quite as emotionally constipated. 12 had this whole arc about spitting out the words though then chibnall didn't do anything with cause he couldn't write characters to save his life. I guess 13 was supposed to look like his (franky offensive, carricaturish) idea of a private person? At least this keeps the tendency of each incarnation being a contrast to their predecessor. Insofar as 13 had enough personality to be contrasted. Chibnalls characters are all emotionless planks of wood - and I'll better stop ranting now

i like the unit lady

It's a charming detail how Rose sells things on etsy. I betcha anything she has a tumblr

// war flashback to Ryan's increbliy generic youtube channel that was never used to characterize him in any way & then forgotten about //, & the detail is added in a kind of loving, relatable way whereas Chibnall kinda mocked the guy for listening to affirmations, for example

Ah it's so nice to have actual CHARACTERIZATION again

Like this just told us that Rose Noble is creative, but also feels responsibility to help her parents.

And her making little plush aliens is immediately lied to her feeling lonely & alienated because of how she's bullied

CONSISTENCY beyond just what is currently needed for the plot yes please. This should be the bare minimum but Chibnall went 8 episodes without giving Yasmin ANY defining traits or moments

So nice to have CHARACTERS with EMOTIONs and TRAITS

I just KNEW the Doctor was getting another Mom slap the moment the moment he showed up

the definite article XD I got that reference, esp in what looks like an Unit episode

oh noes theyre shooting up Donnas house

i love how he just naturally hands the sonic to Donna without thinking

It's extremly Donna-like to worry about her house during the alien attack

I like the resonating the wall trick coming on again - if you saw this straight after EoT, you'd still get the sense that the Doctor got more experienced.

Donna's neighbor missing everything cause he's listening to music is a mood

I love the impromptu judge wig XD

Been a while since I heard "shadow proclamtion". That was common the first time RTD was running the show

I LOVE how the twist & how the Doctor deduced it from the Unit soldier not being dead. The idea that you can know someone by their method

Also love the doctor trying to outfox the Meep but getting a tad too confident there

Also like how Donna absolutely picks up that Sylvia knows the Doctor & demands the truth, but also having a moment of vulnerability

the story's a bit over the top & cliche, though. I mean I can partially forgive it because the ep is really much more about Donna, but not a fan of the over the top cliched villain. though, this RTD is the guy who made the fart episode. he was good at concepts a lot of the time, but yeah...

The wheelchair stun darts are cliche, too, but I DO like the general twist of the unit lady realizing the guards have been mind-controlled & saving the team. She seemed competent earlier. Makes me miss Osgood a bit. One hopes wheelchair lady will keep showing up in UNIT episodes.

I love Donna taking the initiative here to run off. (characters NOT being planks of wood & making self-motivated decisions! Oh im so glad we're rid of Chibnal's trash writing)

Do like the moment. Donna still having her unimportance complex, the Doctor's response that she isn't not just because he doesn't think anyone's unimportant but because she is so important to him, "why does it have to be you" Yeah David Tennant is still good at pulling ppl's heartstrings, his resigned tone when he begins reciting the 'password'

The password being similar to that time Amy had to unlock it!

Donna's first concern upon "waking up" being that she gave away the money is soo her.

Catherine Tate really shines here how she instantly retrieves the... the fast talking thing from Journey's end??

She gets so excited at getting to blow up the alien tech XD

Again praise be to Catherine cause you can tell how the hole of self-doubt that was there (though not as much pre series 4) is just FILLED with confidence.

He just doesn't give a fuck if they shoot him when he thought Donna was dead

The thing where it's less lethal now because some of the energy passed down to her kid is neat, but I don't like the idea that the personality traits of Donna's kid are attributed to the metacrisis thing. Although I suppose it could be seen as more of a nudge or inspiration

I really like the touch that the Doctor remembered the names of the alien soldiers & spoke of them to their superiors, and that he neutralized the meep non-lethally. He's an actual pacifist again with lika a worldview, not just regurgitating lines about "not liking guns" out of context

I HATE the women's intuition thing. I get that they were trying to like affirm Rose's gender as real here but I hate it. It's essentialist and I hate it. I'm gonna treat it as just a joke Donna & Rose did cause they would.

Though I DO like, & find it very appropriate that Donna & Rose themselves are the ones to think up the solution & having it sort of come from Donna's grounded, down to earthsy nature. As a counterpoint to how the Doctor kind of over-ruled Donna's will to sort of unilaterally save her against her will & taking the burden onto himself. (Not that one can blame him too much for what he did while panicking, trying to save his besties' life. )

I love the Doctor fanboying over the new "desktop theme" & praising the TARDIS for the design choices

Such a nice touch that both the Doctor & the TARDIS remember Donna's coffee preferences. It's all about the little things.

David still got it with the "it killed me" line

I do notice that his delivery, while similar, in some aspects, is still markedly different. 14 is more emotionally honest than 10, but also less hyper, he carries himself a bit 'heavier'.

Like I feel some of that subtle distinction in nuance comes down to that when the Dr. turned into 10 it was "for" Rose (so the charme & energy etc were dialed to max), but 14 is "for" Donna, in a way, though he didn't know it at the start.

AAAAnd Donna immediately returns to being a supplier of grounding common-sense advice. Cause she is right about the big goodbye thing

that's a lot of pyrotechnics for just one coffee. Donna must've spilled it into the worst possible spot. That would be the sort of luck they'd have.

Soo. it was an episode without Chibnal's terrible, flavorless writing. I liked some of the story beats though not over the top wowed but I feel like this is the first act of a longer play & the emotional penny is probably still to drop.

#doctor who #fourteenth doctor #donna noble #rose noble