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#you have asthma what the fuck are u talking about!!!!!!
finelinevogue · a month ago
Just wanted to say 2 things:
1)Love the fic where he proposed over a cup of tea…so sweet💗
2) we all know how H has asthma sometimes so…could u write something w/the reader helping him with an attack idk or during an interview/concert/family gathering do as u pls
A nice day
XOXO
firstly, thank you so much that’s so sweet of you <33 and secondly, um yes i would love to give this a go at writing for you! hope you enjoy;
Harry couldn’t breathe.
He was in a panic, completely terrified of the uncontrollable situation. He was having an asthma attack concocted with a panic attack and it was brutal.
“Shit,” Jeff whispered as he watched Harry breathe heavily and loudly on the floor. His friend was currently on his hands and knees trying to gasp for air, whilst dressed in his notorious Fine Line outfit.
It was the big night. The one night only at The Forum for the release of his new album Fine Line, hence the costume. He had been nervous all day, with shaking hands and a tendency to forget simple things. You had been with him all day; having a slow brunch together out in the Hollywood Hills and then just chilling around for the afternoon. You didn’t want to anything to strain his voice, so talking hadn’t been an option. That left you either to sleeping and cuddling, whilst watching a movie, or sex. Now you were all for sex, but Harry complained that he liked talking to you during it and so that got shut down pretty quickly. You didn’t forget what he whispered to your ear though just before you cuddled into watching Bambi;
“Keep your moans for later, you’ll be fucking needing them for what I have planned.”
But that was over two hours ago now. Harry had been whisked away to start getting ready, what with hair and makeup first. You’d left him to it, telling him you would just lounge around and wait for him. It was when he was getting into costume had you announced you were just going to go down the street to get some coffee from Dunkin’ - seeing as there were few of them back in England, where you most commonly lived with Harry. The problem was you hadn’t come back yet, and it was an hour later.
“Harry mate, you need to calm down.” Kid Harpoon told him carefully, kneeling down next to his good friend. Nothing was working though and Harry was too breathless to ask anyone for his inhaler.
It had started by thinking about how nervous he actually was for tonight. It was such a huge show and one of a kind too. He was playing his new album and it wasn’t even 24 hours old yet. There was so much pressure weighing him down that he couldn’t breathe - he was suffocating in the anxiety of his own mind and he couldn’t escape at all. Then because he was in so much of a panic his asthma hit him and added another reason to his breathlessness. It was finally made worst when he realised you weren’t by his side to help him. You weren’t there to quickly eliminate the asthma and focus on helping him overcome the panic attack, instead he had his mates surrounding him - crowding him - and they didn’t know the first thing to do.
“Sarah, where’s Y/N?” Mitch shouted, making Harry squint the thought away. He didn’t want to think about how something back might’ve happened or might be happening to you. Where were you? Sarah’s response did no better to help him.
“I don’t know.”
“Harry bud. Talk to us.” Jeff spoke, crouched down in front of him. Harry shook his head, tears running from his eyes as he began crying. The sobs were really harsh and embarrassing. The tears were heavy and mixed with snot running from his nose to pool on the floor below him. He was not doing well at all, coughing when the asthma choked him up. He couldn’t do this. He felt like he was in a small box and it was only getting smaller. He felt as if he were going to die. Genuinely.
“Does he look like he can talk, dickward.” Adam’s voice came from the other side of Harry, messing his head up even more. There was so many voices and he couldn’t focus on just one, but he didn’t want to. He wanted yours. He needed yours. You.
Whenever this has happened before he was always luckily in the comfort of his home, or the tour bus and always with you. So this was unfamiliar and terrifying. He was beginning to think you’d left him or you’d gotten seriously hurt, but he couldn’t do anything to help. He was stuck - paralysed to this position as his lungs collapsed in on themselves and his brain sped the same speed as a train. You were his comfort person and it was only ever you that he wanted in situations like these. Just you.
“Move out of my way. Move!” Harry thought he heard you and your voice, but he hated that his mind could be playing tricks on him in desperation for what, or whom, he truly wanted.
He felt someone crash on the floor in front of him and the almighty smell of lavender and soap hit him all at once. This time, he was glad to have someone sit so close to him, because it was you.
“Harry look at me, hey, hey. You’re okay. Look at me bubs.” You spoke calmly, trying not to sound panicked yourself, even if you were heavily worried. You watched as he looked up at you, eyes ridiculously red and puffy whilst his nose was dripping like a leaking tap. You wanted to rub his tears away and dab away the snot, but your main priority was on his breathing first. “Okay good, okay.”
Your hand went into your bag and picked out his inhaler. You shook it a few times, before putting it into Harry’s mouth. “On three, one, two, three…” Harry tried is best to breathe in and you pushed down on the canister. “Good, bubs, really good. Okay again, one, two, three…” You repeated and then a third time until you could tell that the wheezing of his asthma attack had disappeared.
“T-than…” Harry tried to mumble out, but couldnt because he was still in panic and his throat was so dry.
“Sshh you’re okay.” You turned to one of the crew members and asked for them to fetch you a bottle of water. You asked people to clear out of the room and leave you with Harry for a bit, knowing he wouldn’t settle in front of all these people. You sat on the floor, crossed legged, and brought Harry to lay his head in your lap with his body trailing behind. You offered him one of your hands to squeeze if he wanted to, which he appreciated, cupping both of his around yours. Your other hand laid to stroke through his gelled hair - that would no doubt have to be redone now.
Instead of going straight into talking to him, you sang his favourite lullaby to him in aid of calming him down. It always worked, or at least helped a little. You sang quietly, noticing the beat of his heart soften with every line you sung. You were by no means a professional singer like him, but he liked the way it was so imperfect and mellow. It calmed him to hear something so simple and so you. Whilst you sang the crew never came back with your requested water and you thanked them, before you were the only ones left in the room.
After you finished singing you noticed how calm Harry was, almost still - the complete opposite to how he’d been all of 10 minutes ago. It was amazing what the power of you could do to him.
“What colour are we feeling?” You and Harry had created your own little system by which you would let each other know how you’re feeling by a colour of the rainbow. You’d designated a meaning to all of them that only you two could understand and used them on the days when you weren’t feeling great, to help understand each other’s feelings better.
“The whole bloody rainbow.” Harry mumbled out and you passed the water around so he could take a few sips, to which he thanked you graciously for.
“Oi, you can’t have that as your answer.” It was a rule that you could only use one colour to some your most intense emotion in that moment, otherwise there was kind of no point to the system.
“But it’s true. I feel grey with confusion, blue with sadness, purple with frustration, yellow with fear and even light yellow with cowardice. Yet I feel pink with happiness and light red with love.”
“What about red red?” You teased, not being able to help yourself.
“What? Lust? Always, for you that is.” You leant down to kiss his head as he cracked a joke, showing you that your Harry was still there beneath all this worry.
“Tell me what the colours represent in real life.”
“Purple because I am frustrated that I had to have a panic attack right before the biggest show of my career. Yellow because I am frightened that nobody will like the album and it will be a complete fail of a night. Grey because I can’t choose one colour and focus on it. I.. I—”
You could tell he getting himself worked up again, so cut him short. “Bubs stop, you’re okay. Listen to me.” You tucked his hair behind his ear as if to open it up for him to hear better. “Don’t ever be frustrated with yourself for something like this. You are allowed to have moments of weakness; you wouldn’t be human if you didn’t. Did this compromise your show? No. Did this show off how strong and brave you are? Yes. That’s what is important, therefore we can swap purple for dark yellow because you were brave. Which means yellow can also turn to dark yellow because you are so brave for doing something so huge and so wonderful. People already love the album H. Can’t get enough of it. Everyone will sing along to every word, I can promise you that. Or at least I will. You are amazing, so never undersell yourself. That’s important to me and for you. Bubs, you are so amazing for what you’re doing here tonight and I couldn’t be prouder of you. Yes, a panic attack isn’t nice and it isn’t convenient, but it just helps show how much you care about tonight and it going a success. That must count for something.”
He didn’t say anything for a bit and that was okay. He was most likely getting his thoughts together and mentally preparing himself for the greatest night of his life. You bent your body over so you could hug him, since his back was to your front, and just give him a squeeze to reiterate how proud you are of him.
“Y/N.” Harry spoke quietly, as your body encased his. You embraced his warmth and inhaled the beautiful scent that he was wearing. He both smelt and looked phenomenal.
“Yes bubs.”
“You know I love you right?” Of course you did, but it still made your heart flutter as crazy as the first time he said it to when he tells you now.
“I do.”
“And you know you’re it for me right?”
“Well.. I—” You didn’t want to get too ahead of yourself.
“Because you are.” Harry turned himself around, making you sit up so he could move. He was lying with his head facing upwards now, face looking less red and puffy, and staring right into the souls of your eyes. He looked magical. Beautiful. He thought the same of you. “And,” he moved his fingers to take off his S ring from Gucci, that probably cost more than your annual salary, and place it onto your ring finger of your right hand, “I give you this as a promise to share my last name with you someday.”
Seeing the initial of his last name sat on the finger opposite to the one he claimed he would one day put two more rings on, brought you to tears. “Harry…” You didn’t know what to say, you were speechless. You had never expected for him to do something as monumental as this and had never experienced it before to know how to react.
Of course you’d always dreamt of marrying him and being his for eternity, but never thought of it possibly becoming your reality. Now, Harry was completely devoting himself to you and only you and it suddenly all felt like the dream was settling in place.
“I swear to you Y/N, i’ll love you until the next lifetime and i’ll find you again. I love you so much, I can’t even tell you how much because it is so infinite. You’re so kind and patient with me and you see me for me, not for the Harry Styles, just Harry. I’ll never let a day pass without you on my mind and I think it’s because you were always meant to be mine. My heart is yours.” He smiled once he noticed you were crying, moving one of his hands up to wipe the tears away.
“How do I top that?” You whispered to him, but mostly to yourself. Both of you laughed.
“Just tell me you love me.”
“I do. I do love you Harry.” You nodded and then he sealed your confirmation with a kiss to his lips. You rested your hand upon his cheek, placing the coolness of the S ring upon his cheekbone, as he placed his hand under your chin to guide you into the kiss. He tasted divine and you smiled knowing that you got to have him like this, taste him like this, for the rest of your beating hearts’ days.
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shanastoryteller · 4 months ago
Questions about outlines: How detailed are they? Are they the same level of detail or do they vary? How do you make your outlines? Chronologically scene by scene? Or do you come up with the scenes that call you and then come up with smaller filler scenes to fill in the gaps? Do you have outlines for each chapter? Or just for the larger general plot points? Do you try to complete the outlying before starting the fic? Or do you add to the outline as you go? Sorry if this is to many at once
lmao okay i got several asks about outlines but i’m just going to answer this one because it’s ~comprehensive~
every writing teacher i’ve ever had has hated my outlines. my friends find them incomprehensible.
if people are going to look at my answers as ways to do their own outlines, i have to say: that’s probably not a good idea
i don’t write outlines a majority of the time
i don’t write outlines to plan a story i’ve already decided to write
i write outlines primarily as a way to exorcise story ideas that i want to write but don’t want to actually commit to writing (answer prompts are another way i do this lol)
now, some things do get outlines as a way to plan and organize. survival is a talent has an outline because it’s 400k and spans six years. child king had an outline. needy’s body had an outline. 
b u t
i’m currently writing rotten work without an outline
lynchpin didn’t have an outline
hope is the thing with feathers didn’t have an outline
never grow a wishbone only had an outline for the first couple of chapters 
an invincible summer didn’t get an outline until like. chapter 4 of 6. 
i just. uh. think about what i want to happen and then hope i remember to write it down. even when i do an outline, i’ll deviate from it wildly, and not update it to reflect that, because i know what i’m doing (ha!)
so! with that in mind, let’s go! 
How detailed are they? Are they the same level of detail or do they vary?
they vary! but honestly - not very. sometimes i’ll write out a paragraph or bits of dialogue that are important to me, but most of the time it’s just broad strokes of what i want to happen, or a mechanism of how something complicated happens. like i have several paragraphs in my siat outline dealing with necromancy books, but like. two sentences on how they actually occur in the story because that’s just something i’m trusting myself to figure out when i sit down to write it.  
 How do you make your outlines? Chronologically scene by scene? Or do you come up with the scenes that call you and then come up with smaller filler scenes to fill in the gaps? 
I try to put them chronologically, although sometimes that’s a little hard (in siat i have several scenes that i know will happen, i just don’t know when). that is something i will go back and edit on my outlines, is if i’ve changed the order the something happens i’ll go back and copy and paste until my outlines is in the right order. but only if the outlines is something i’m actually using to write and the story is longer than a couple of chapters. 
because my outlines are so very not detailed, i just write down what it is that i want to write, like the reason i’m going to write this or want to write this, and figure out the rest later. i’ll fill it in later - or i won’t! because most of the time i don’t use my outline to actually write the story, and i use it more as an idea list, so if i don’t know what happens between scenes or i find it boring i just won’t write it down
like, for example, here is my “outline” for won’t even plant a garden in it’s entirety 
weep as a woman
“you weep as a woman weeps.” “and how is that?” “as if the future rests on your hips, and you must walk it forward.”
crowley and eve were friends. cain killed abel with the flaming sword, and crowley begged them to say it was with a rock instead
crowley was raphael the painter and fucked michelangelo
crowley was there the night yeshua was born, was friends with mary, helped raise yeshua?
ghosts
crowley and anathema and joan of arc
i ended up dropping most of this and crowley ended up sleeping with both eve and yeshua as the major plot points. i don’t explain stuff, really. i know what i mean so i just don’t bother to get very detailed most of the time. 
Do you have outlines for each chapter? Or just for the larger general plot points?
siat i divide up by year, and i think i did it by chapter for the last two chapters of build your wings on the way down, but otherwise it’s just one long list. i do my chapters based on words counts rather than content, so outlining by chapter doesn’t really make sense for me (siat is always around 15k a chapter, and everything else  i do these days thats multi chapter is around 8k because that’s the best, but ngawb was 5k a chapter and i think for child king it was around 11k a chapter)
Do you try to complete the outlying before starting the fic? Or do you add to the outline as you go?
I’m constantly adding as a i go! my outlines are never really “complete” they’re just abandoned. i write down what i think will help me and tend to ignore the rest. sometimes i just. talking to myself in my outlines when i’m trying to think something through. 
my outline for child king is under the cut because that’s one that’s a good mix of stuff i kept and stuff i threw out. DON’T JUDGE ME!! bad ideas don’t get written because they’re bad!! it’s part of the ~process~ 
child king
Summary: “A child king is still a king,” Deaton says softly. “A child king is still a child,” he snaps, but he knows this is an argument he’s already lost.  – Stiles is a born alpha, and after the Hale fire, things get real complicated, real fast.
Stiles’s mom is the last remaining human from a pack that was destroyed by hunters. John is the one that helps her after, so he knows everything. When they move to beacon hills she doesn’t feel the need to say anything to the hale pack, because as far as they’re concerned she’s just a human, and she doesn’t want to get involved in pack business. But then stiles is born with red eyes. The doctor is quiet and scared john and Claudia freak out, but it’s because he’s a werewolf, which is a relief to parents because they thought something was wrong with their kid. Maybe they don’t know he’s an alpha, only that he’s a wolf? Or they know and they keep it a secret on purpose
Claudia is the one to approach mrs. Hale. She tells her that her son is a born werewolf, but that she’s not interested in joining their pack. Her husband is a new deputy and they just bought a house but they’ll move if they have to. “he’ll need a pack one day. It’s safer,” she says. “if he wants to join you one day, I won’t stop him. But that’s not a choice I’m willing to make for him.” Mrs hale agrees that they can say separate as in exchange for the sheriff smoothing over some ruffled feathers no and again. They agree. Claudia to sheriff “we’re going to have to move one day. Our son is an alpha, and he’ll need to make his own pack.”
Stiles is seven the first time he snarls at his mom, eyes flashing red, and she freezes. She’s got the pack instinct, it doesn’t matter that hes her kid, hes still her alpha, so its hella awkward. John can see how this will quickly spiral out of control if they can discipline their own kid. But stiles is the one to back down first, apologizing and doing as he’s told. There are careful power structures here, and this is the beginning of differentiating between stiles the human and stiles the wolf.
When his mom gets sick, stiles offers to turn her. Hale offers to turn her. She refused for Reasons that I have to figure out. Maybe the politics of it? Wanting to protect stiles and not wanting to become part of the hale pack
The fire happens. John ships stiles the hell out of dodge, because there are hunters about. He snoops around enough to figure out it was kate argent, but theres not really anything he can do about it
Scott knows about everything, and tries to tell his mom in a really akward way that they should trust stiles if they’re ever in danger, but she just laughs it off. Except when someone breaks in and threatens her with a gun, and she manages to make a phone call, it’s not 911, not john, but stiles, and she doesn’t even know why, regrets it as soon as it happens. But then stiles shows up and breaks both of the guys, eyes glowing red, and then calls his dad and scott to take care of it, because they’re humans, so they get human punishments. Melissa is told everything.
Scott has a bad asthma attack and, and Melissa asks about the bite. Scott is itching for it. He wants it so badly. Stiles has already promised to turn them when they turn 18, and Melissa knows that. She asks if theres a reason to wait, and the answer is nah, not really. So he gets the bite. Stiles being like uh psa punishments cant include scott staying away
After hale fire and stiles gets back, he’s shocked that hey just left, and that they left peter behind. He starts visiting peter several times a week. He tells his dad that they should pay for his medical care. They have a fuckton of money because his mom inherited all the pack wealth, and john doesn’t touch it because that’s stiles’s money, that’s werewolf money. But this is a werewolf thing, so he agrees. “his pack left him dad.”
Stiles bites Erica when they’re 14. Some point in middle school stiles wises up to the Isaac thing and tells his dad he needs to arrest his dad, or stiles is going to kill him, and he’s not even a little bit joking. Stiles hears Isaac crying while going by the house? In johns squad car. Makes them pull over, then bursts into the house. John goes with it because his son’s eyes are red.
Some point after the hales leave, things start trying to move into hale territory. Some wolves? Stiles smells them, and ends up at 10 years old telling them to fuck off. This how scott finds out? He’s with scott and his dad. Deaton is facing off against something? Panics when stiles intervenes, but stiles goes wolfy and red eyes and is like. This is mine now fuck off. Looks at the hale house, and finally says, we have to take care of this. We have to. But they don’t own the house or the land or any of it. They do … something
Stiles ends up having to deal with a lot of crap real young
Stiles has scott and Isaac when peter wakes up. Stiles is there, and peter isn’t crazy because he wasn’t abandoned to die alone. Stiles says he can stay, or he can go, not trying to pressure anything. Peter chooses to become part of stiles’s pack, because his family is either dead or abandoned him. Peter ends up moving in with them as he finishes healing and to get used to being in a pack and with stiles. It’s very strange for john, but it’s a werewolf thing and he’s trying to be supportive. After a couple months, stiles tells his dad that having peter is a relief, that there’s finally someone who knows things, someone older who can support him as a werewolf. Peter acts as his second, and he finally has some degree of authority that age has lost him. Stiles has peter take care of the hale house. Peter and stiles have the conversation, where peter is like the hale land is your land now. You’re the alpha of beacon hills. He does what stiles directs him to.
Isaac is living with scott under stiles’s direction ish. But lots of Melissa. Isaac like I don’t wantto be afraid anymore, I don’t want to hurt anymore, and stiles is like. Okay. We’ll fix this. But he doesn’t bite Isaac until he goes to a shitton of therapy and has mostly sorted himself out. For isaac’s fifteenth birthday, he bites him.
Erica is spur of the moment, it’s something that all instinct and very little thought. OR they’re dating and it happesn? Erica’s parents suck. Stiles doesn’t want the balancing act of being boyfriend and alpha.
Jackson is so fucking desperate to belong to something. He nags and nags and nags and finally stiles bites him at least half to shut him up.
“dad can I talk to you about something weird and uncomfortable and a little creepy” talks about crush on Lydia, and how he’s not sure if its because he has a crush on her or if it’s bc he thinks she’ll be good for the pack. Lydia joins before Jackson, and she’s the one that pushes stiles into it. Lydia and stiles are not dating, but she’s clearly high in the hiarchey.
Boyd? Just like. Shows up. Idk.
So by the time laura and derek show up, stiles’s pack is: john, Melissa, peter, Lydia, Jackson, danny, Isaac, boyd, Erica, deaton (who’s acting as emissary but is training danny). Maybe bring in some later characters, like malia and kira and cora. Ooooh maybe the twins show up before they became alphas, still run aways and looking for something else? Stiles takes them on. Stiles finds malia early on after the fire
Peter is willing to forgive derek but he has a lot of shit with laura. Stiles agrees to let laura and derek stay and not be part of his pack, although laura insists she doesn’t need his permission. She snaps at peter to come home with them, and he looks at her like she’s insane. He says there’s no hale pack, and if there was, he’s not interested. He’s a stillinkski wolf now. Cora too maybe? Double blow. Peter owns the hale land, and he makes it clear the day stiles turns 18 he’ll be signing it over to him. Stiles is known by the surrounding packs.
Stiles has to somehow defend the surrounding area, has to make it clear he’s his and that he’s not willing to give it up. It’s valuable land. People are going to come looking for it once people figure out it’s abandoned. When deaton finds out stiles is an alpha, he goes around as an emissary to the surrounding packs. Saying that its under stiles now. He’s known to them so it goes mostly uncontested. This is when he and the sheriff have the child king conversation.
Stiles tries really, really hard to be a good alpha. That means controlling the territory, and working with other packs when members go rouge or something goes wrong. He’s thirteen the first time he goes to lend a hand in a fight, and it’s young, it’s too young, but he’s an alpha. He has to do this, to maintain the peace. And the thing is – stiles is good at this, good at not pushing, at not using his status as a crutch or an excuse, instead as a tool.
Maybe this is why no one cares for laura’s excuses. As much as laura wasn’t ready to take on the responsibility, she was an adult, if only barely. Stiles is a literal child, and in her absence shouldered it all. So even if she does technically have a claim, none of them are willing to honor it. “if you kill alpha stiles, you won’t have allies, you’ll have enemies.”
Allison and argents. Stiles brings his pack to kill kate. Gives peter the chance to do it himself, and is so very proud when he says no. but instead of letting her go free, stiles crushes her throat. “revenge would have been trapping you all in here and setting the whole thing on fire. Justice would have been making you watch as she burned alive. This was mercy, and don’t you forget it.” Scott is hella in love with Allison, but he knows this comes first. Her mom is full of hatred, but stiles more than makes it clear that he has no problem with killing her too.
Stiles sees derek soon after. They’ve already gone back and forth a lot. But he and laura weren’t there. Stiles tells him what he did. They have a ~moment~
Derek wants so very much to join stiles’s pack, but he doesn’t want to lose laura.
Something finally convinces laura to take the plunge and the stillinksi pack is one happy family
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noona96n · 6 months ago
Okay so like.. I don't want to stress anyone because I'm already stressed enough but I really do need to talk about it. I'm really scared that creators might choose Shi De to have some sort of terminal illness. It's because of those hospital bills but also in credit scenes when Shu Yi hides his face on Shi De's shoulder while he's hugging him Shu Yi seems very content while I sense some... worry in Shi De's gaze? Maybe I'm looking into it too much but it would make sense why he didn't contact Shu Yi. Tho I hope I'm just looking too much into it and it's just because of Shu Yi's dad.
????????????????????????????
This is gonna sound rude but, like, I seriously need to know what juice you were on when you thought of this asfghjkldi. Like ??? I will try to be as respectful as possible as I rebut ur thoughts & convince u otherwise.
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1. The name on the bill is ‘Troy A Cornelius’
This is probably his stepdad’s name unless Shi De changed his name into an English one. Even if he does change his name to English, I think he would still keep the initials of his Taiwanese name so, at the very least, SD should be in there somewhere. 
2. It doesn’t make sense for Shi De to have a entirely new American identity
Shi De has always planned on coming back to Shu Yi and his family (his mom specifically bcs Zhen Xuan clearly said that Shi De’s here in his mom’s place) even has a goddamn company in Taiwan. Like,,, imagine all the ‘banana’ comments he’d get if his Taiwanese ass shows up at the office, in fckn Taiwan, with a name like ‘Troy A Cornelius’ asfghjkldi
3. The med bill: meperidine & promethazine
Meperidine is an opioid pain medication, sometimes called a narcotic. Promethazine is a sedative and anti-nausea medication. Meperidine and promethazine is a combination medicine used to treat moderate to severe pain. (x)
I’m not a medical professional (but, fun fact, my mom is lol) so I can’t say for sure that I know the correct usage of meperidine & promethazine or that their usage aren’t alarming but they seemed to be used for relieving pain & treating allergies, etc. and I think they can also be used as pre-medication for asthma... (Maybe @littlestellagibson can clarify? I’m overstepping my boundaries here but uh,,, forgive me,,, most of my med knowledge comes from my mom & the WebMD)
Troy A Cornelius was at the hospital for an emergency service level two which is usually for cardiac arrest or asthma attack (my knowledge of emergency room level is from my mom, who’s a doctor in a developing country... idk if the States operate with the same level as my country)
>>> So, I assume that Troy A Cornelius was suffering from an asthma attack... which Shi De clearly doesn’t have. (I think it would’ve come up by now if Shi De does have asthma.)
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4. The hugging scene is probably connected to the scene where Shu Yi asked Shi De if he’s still the lucky one + them sleeping on the bed (i will collectively refer to these 2 scenes as ‘bed & box scenes’)
Obviously, the ‘bed & box scenes’ are connected... they’re wearing the exact same clothes. Also, the background of the ‘box scene’ is Shu Yi’s bedroom (the grey, brutalist wall of his bedroom + the black fixture/furniture that is in line with the interior design of Shu Yi’s current house).
And I dare connect the ‘hugging scene’ to the ‘bed & box scenes’ because they seem to be wearing the same clothes as that scene... especially Shu Yi (he’s wearing the short sleeves black t-shirt)
We’ve only seen Shu Yi in 2 black casual shirts so far... the short sleeves t-shirt & the long sleeves sweater. If u can’t tell which one he’s wearing in a scene, just look at the collar... the sweater’s collar is closer to the base of his neck & it has patterns.
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Plus! Shu Yi seems to be sitting on Shi De’s lap (the difference in their heights despite the fact that they’re sitting so close) and Shu Yi looks like he’s sitting on Shi De’s laps as he hugs Shi De in the ‘hugging’ scene (Shu Yi's shoulders are clearly above Shi De's mouth & nose line).
So... yes, I do think these scenes are connected. 
>>> I set up all these connections because I want to point out that the ‘bed & box scenes’ are extremely emotional. 
Shi De’s literally crying into the pillow as he sleeps beside Shu Yi. Shi De’s literally sleeping on the same bed as the love of his life, in his room, right next to him and Shi De’s still fucking crying silently into the pillow and suffering in silence. 
Meanwhile, Shu Yi is laying all of himself bare, once again, as he asked ‘is that luck still mine’. (I also assume that the box contains the bracelet... Shu Yi’s probably asking if he still has the right to have Shi De’s love and his promise of being in Shu Yi’s life & giving him happiness.)
So, if the ‘hugging scene’ is really connected to the ‘bed & box scenes’ or just the ‘box scene’ at the very least, it’s understandable that the both of them are emotionally compromised when they’re hugging. It’s understandable that Shu Yi is relief to know that he’s still the love of Shi De’s life and Shi De would feel guilty/shameful for hurting Shu Yi & making Shu Yi cries.
5. Lin Pei Yu
She’s the writer of WBL and she has never kill anyone off unnecessarily. Seriously. She might have written some questionable storylines for BLs  (History: obsessed + the pseudo-incest plot in History: Crossing the line) but everyone in her BLs lives and thrives with the promise of fulfilling romantic relationships. 
Examples: she had a lot of opportunities, and legitimate reasons, to kill off Ah Fei in History: Trapped, but she didn’t. Her characters suffered from serious injuries but they don’t die. She even literally fckn wrote a BL where a dead man resurrected in his younger self so he can have a second chance (History: obsessed).
I think the boys are safe! So let's not add unnecessary stress on ourselves and enjoy the angst of adult-life and complicated (& useless) pride.
6. Talk of S3 &/or movie
There are many posts on IG (I only lurk on IG lol) saying that the cast & crew are seriously considering making a third season (and/or a movie) for WBL. There will be no talk of a third season if Shi De dies… Shu Yi & Shi De are the stars of the show, they’re not gonna kill off their moneymakers.
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i also received another ask of a similar nature and I'm only answering once bcs i don't want that sort of negativity on my blog
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As for the ‘i saw people saying that Sam accidentally spoiled this in a live’, I’d like to see the posts about this spoiler & the vid of this live, preferably w/ eng sub ofc.
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ohlovelywar · 2 months ago
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stan the gay’s wingman
you asked, and you shall receive…. a couple years later because i completely forgot that this was sitting in here everyone i’m sooooo sorry
now, it was no secret to literally anyone how annoying richie tozier and eddie kapsbrak could possibly be, much less the losers club
and it was even LESS of a secret how annoyed stanley uris would be by the two’s constant bickering 
the losers didn’t know what stan knew though
and BOY did that make things so much more entertaining 
ask anyone in derry, maine and they would tell you that richie and eddie argued like they were an old, married couple 
however, stan was the only human being to actually KNOW what’s hidden beneath the bickering 
the losers club all guessed it was some sort of love but it was never confirmed to them 
but stanley could SENSE it with his gaydar  eyes
the gay 
it all became crystal clear a few months before ben showed the losers his club house for them. 
after a rather unfortunate game of truth or dare, stan our local gay whisperer, ended up putting two and two together 
“holy shit, they actually like each other!” 
“what was that stan?” 
“i said your farm’s nice mike!” slight gay panic 
and after tracking the two down separately and having a long talk, they both admitted their crushes on each other 
“dear diary, i am a motherfucking genius! sincerely, stanley uris. p.s.: sorry for cursing!” 
now that THAT was out of the way, stan’s work was done…at least that’s what he thought
u see,,, richie and eddie aren’t just gay, no no, they’re gay DISASTERS
and since stan the man’s the only one who knows naturally he’s the one they come to for help
“i need to blow richie’s socks off with this date!” stan’s got the place “how do i get eddie a gift for his birthday that says i’m really happy you’re alive but you’re also the biggest pain in my ass most days” stan has that mostly to do with richie let’s just be honest here
stan was the super genius mastermind behind for the big moments in their relationship, as well as the one to make sure the two idiots didn’t go screwing up the great thing they have
“listen we all fucking know u use humor as a defense mechanism because you’re scared to get close to people just for them to leave you but if you could just pleaseee for ONCE in your life respond to a question like a normal human being so your boyfriend doesn’t ditch your ass for someone who doesn’t openly talk about fucking his mother every two seconds” “….an ‘i’m doing great richie’ would’ve been nice-“ “WHAT DID I JUST!2?3)2?2)2”
poor boy’s diary sees all the drama
“if eddie would just TELL richie that he actually doesn’t hate how much he makes fun of his asthma cause it’s the only time anyone believes he’s able to do anything a boy his age can do and won’t coddle him BUT NOOOOO NO ONE TAUGHT THESE TWO BASIC COMMUNICATION SKILLS”
he’s put his own blood sweat and tears into this relationship he’s not about to watch it fall apart cause their preschool teachers never taught them the “i feel” lesson
“listen you dumb asses we leave for college in TWO MONTHS! in two months we’re going to be adults so you both better start acting like it and start actually TALKING to each other instead of bitching about why you can’t appreciate your boyfriend to his face to me and my diary! I SAID ZIP IT RICHIE!!”
yes they made up and richie did make fun of stan’s diary
it’s not like his efforts went unnoticed oh no
the two may be gay disasters but they’re thankful gay disasters put some respect in their names🗣🗣🗣
the day after their anniversary richie and eddie make sure to give stan a gift every year as a thank u for helping them last this long
“really if it wasn’t for you his trash mouth would’ve stayed single years ago!!!” “WELL URE ONE TO TALK?!???” “i know…and i know…”
everyone stay thank you stanley uris!!!
BONUS!!
“now,,,, you think we can set him and mike up?” “stan got us together how are can it be!”
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yarichin-imagines · 2 months ago
since you did a drunk one, what do u think the characters are like stoned 😳
tw: aphrodisiacs
just one note here, i don't smoke, never have ekekekeke.
i consulted a stoner who wished to remain anonymous, don't hold it against me :))))
BUT !! i love this concept.
also, i have a hc that tamura has asthma and that’s mentioned in here !!!
xoxo, yari
Owns a Drug Rug – Jimmy
the real question is, when is he not baked like a cake?
he opens up more, that's for sure
one time he went into such explicit detail about a scene with yuri that tamura actually puked
smokes sativa out of a bong
his highs last really long
like hours
the longest on record was about 4
it always starts with mania
he's bouncing off the walls
he will bite down all of nails
his crash has him cuddly and soft
he likes his sweaters to be oversized, and if he smells, it's actually more pleasant than skunky
he's really into aphrodisiac strains of sativa tho
once he realized two highs at once was better than one, unless it's a special occasion, he's smoked up before his dicks goes up
the high's make him dom leaning, but with a little bit of "rust-eaze" sweet talk, he cracks
when he's high, he knows that he can last a lot longer, and it takes more for him to cum
that makes the games all the better
Has a Pen - Tamura
there was some upperclassman who let him hit a pen once and tamura’s been hooked ever since
he’s not opposed to other ways to get high, but the pen is the easiest
that way he’s not hitting and puffing all in one go
one of those stoners that insists he doesn't have a problem, but 3/5 days a week he's making extra bathroom trips to get quick hits in
he's actually high more often than you'd think
aphrodisiac strains give him the heebie jeebies
he tried one and woke up next to yuri and akemi & itome eight hours later, glazed in a cum-coating like a perverted cake
(how the actual fuck he bottomed in that combo, he'll never know)
sativasativasativa keeps him satisfied
he studies when he’s high, especially the tougher stuff like the sciences and mathematics courses
his highs give him motivation to do stuff that would usually be "a total pain"
he cleans up and does chores, like his laundry, sometimes his groceries
his has yuri drive him, and he will always put on a miss daisy
doing tasks like that keep him from getting anxious shakes, at least until he starts coming down
he's really cranky once he's sober, like a brat
you can count on him feeling much better after a 3 hour nap
Socially Smokes – Akemi, Itome
akemi and itome don't smoke enough to have a ton distinguished behaviors
their shared philosophy is much like their philosophy on snacks: if it's there, of course we're going to eat some
akemi prefers indica
being the club president is exhausting after all
on rare occasions when meetings are held off campus (in a more casual setting) one or two hits and he's good to go
his domspace drop is a hell of a lot deeper, but line between who's topping who and who's bottoming to who gets very thin and very blurry
he talks wayyyyy slower and is in a state of half consciousness
itome prefers sativa
the strains he prefers tend to make him a romantic
he takes the lead more often when he's high like this, as a way to treat his wonderful boyfriend who takes care of everything
he's dazed and confused when he's high but he's always happy
finds everything funny
birds, trees, words, knees
literally everything
akemi knows that if itome has a subdrop when he's high, he's going to need a lot of reassurance and aftercare--
he feels like he forced it or that he was selfish
akemi always reminds him he could never
Smokes to Cope – Yacchan
yacchan could probably tell you exactly where to get the best product, if he's not actually selling himself that is
when all of his stress comes to a head, that's when he gets high out of his mind
when you asked indica or sativa, he says sativa, but he prefers hallucinogenic strains above all
this way, he can exist in another world for a little while
he likes to get high and take a train to the city
sometimes he'll just sit and watch the lights of the signs and stores
sometimes he'll find an arcade or a cafe and lose himself in interaction, human or not
he sobers up pretty easily on his own
just a few shots of espresso and he's back to himself
Edibles – Yuri
he doesn't like the sensation of the inhale/exhale when you use a pipe, bong, or roll
also, he didn't like paying for something that he could perfect
his recipe is ultimately flawless, and it's always hybrid
he puts it in milkshakes
yes
milkshakes
and they're not even ugly
there's multiple flavors and boosters and he actually really enjoys perfecting the craft
but it's a family recipe, paws off
the high he gets is more mellow than anything, but the hybrid always has just that smidge of aphrodisiacs for a good time
Does not smoke - Toono, Shikatani, Kashima
toono doesn't smoke because. . he's toono
he actually cries if somebody asks him
poor thing is anxious
shikatani doesn't smoke because the cleanup is a pain
but he doesn't like the out of body sensation
kashima doesn't smoke because he's too committed to his sports
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bakugousdumbass · 8 months ago
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Asthma
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Summary: Your one of the famous dancers on your team, you end up getting your first solo but your so nervous and end up having an asthma attack.
Pairings: Kuroo x F!Reader
Warnings: Asthma Attack
Genre: Slight Angst to fluff
“Tetsu I’m not sure about this.” You mumbled while biting your nails in fear, your dance team is one of the popular dancing teams in Japan. You recently got a solo and been practicing for about 2 weeks, you felt confident with the dance. Until you saw the crowd of people, sure dancing with a group of girls is quite big but by yourself? One word: Fear “What’s wrong kitten?” Your boyfriend Kuroo asked while cupping your cheeks, you gave him a frown. “It’s my first solo and I’m scared I’m gonna screw it up.” You mumbled again, Kuroo sighed “Look baby you only got about half n hour before you go on, your gonna do great I promise. Pretend your dancing towards a mirror and looking at yourself, like what you do during practice. Trust me kitten, your gonna do great okay?” Kuroo gave you smile before kissing your nose “O-okay.” You sighed before taking a few deep breaths and drinking some water to calm down “There’s my girl.” Kuroo smiled before walking you towards your dressing room.
“Ms. Y/N! Your on in 10 minutes!” One of the workers called out from your dressing room door, your eyes widened. Your heart started to beat 100x faster and your breathing turned into wheezes “O-okay.” You managed to spit out, you checked yourself in the mirror before walking out towards the side of the stage seeing the previous dancer do their dance. Your chest was heaving up and down and your chest was getting tight, and your throat felt dry.You’ve had asthma since a baby and it was never this worse. Tears began to pool your eyes as your grip tightened on the curtain your were holding, you started to panic now that you realize you couldn’t breathe. “Hey Y/N I can’t wait for your- hey are you okay??” You turned around to see one of your friends that dance with you with a scared face, you shook your head and pointed to your throat “C-can’t b-breathe.” You wheeze out her eyes widened “Oh my god okay hold on!” She ran before giving your back a small pat, instantly your coach and a paramedic came out. “Hey sweetie what’s happening??” Your coached asked in worry “It’s a asthma attack.” The paramedic said while searching for an inhaler in the safe-AID kit, you looked around before you saw your boyfriend with a worried look he ran towards you.” “Hey hey baby what’s happening??” Kuroo cupped your cheeks with his warm hands seeing your heaving chest and wheezing breath “Shit.” Kuroo mumbled before turning around seeing the paramedic with the inhaler, Kuroo gave you the inhaler. “Breathe baby, hey look at me and breathe.” You looked at him while inhaling, still panicked and tears falling down your cheeks. “No baby don’t cry your okay just breathe, your okay just breathe.” Your coached and team watched in fear as your boyfriend managed to help you, after a few more deep breaths and some back rubs, your chest slowly started to stop heaving and your wheezing became at a little ease. Kuroo sighed in relief, you’re coach told the judges to wait for a couple minutes due to the asthma attack. “Are you alright sweetie?” Your coach asked you “I-I think s-so.” The paramedic wrote some notes down before talking to your coach “Baby are you okay??” Kuroo asked you still cupping your cheeks, wiping away your dry tears. You nodded before letting out a whimper, you started to cry. “Oh- baby no no no c’mere.” Kuroo pulled you to his chest rubbing your back and kissing your head repeatedly, “I-I’m s-so-sorry.” You hiccuped “Why are you apologizing baby?” “B-because I-I’m wasting t-time with my s-stupid astma.” Your team immediately joined the hug telling you “It’s okay.” “This isn’t your fault.” “Your gonna do great.” “We’re here for you.”
You smiled a little bit before wiping away the last strands of tears, “Do you think you can dance Y/N?” You coach asked you “U-I’m I mean I really wanna do this a-and I been practicing it for t-two w-weeks.” You mumbled while looking at Kuroo “Baby you don’t have to if you don’t want too, especially after that asthma attack.” Kuroo said in worry scared you were gonna have another attack on stage “I-I think I c-could d-do it Tetsu.” You say with a smile making Kuroo nod and kissed your lips then forehead before pulling you in a hug “I love you and remember what I said earlier okay?” You nod before giving him one last kiss and waited for the judges to call out your name.You turned around seeing your team,coach, and boyfriend give thumbs up and a smile. You smiled back
“Now entering the stage is 1456 Y/N performing “Wings”!” You entered the stage reviving claps from the crowd and backstage, you took a deep breath before starting.
“Pretend your dancing in front of a mirror.”
You took Kuroo’s words repeating it in your head while doing your dance with a smile, your team,coach, and Kuroo all had a smile. Kuroo smiled while letting out a chuckle “That’s my girl alright.” “She’s one of a kind.” Your coach told Kuroo with a smile, Kuroo hummed in response. You did your final pose before the music faded and a loud roar of screaming and claps came from the crowed and backstage. “THATS MY BABY RIGHT THERE!” Kuroo screamed with a fist in the air your team chuckled at him, you ran towards him. He picked you up before spinning around, “Baby! That was beautiful, I’m so fucking proud of you!” Kuroo cupped your cheeks before landing his lips on your’s, your team squealed while clapping. Your coach chuckled before clapping as well, “I love you so much kitten.” Kuroo mumbled between kisses “I love you more Tetsu.” You say before giving him a big hug, you then had to go back out with all of the different dancers competing. You all were waiting to see who would win this year’s competition, they gave out the 3rd to 2nd place winners before going to 1st Place “And the 1st Place dancer for this year competition is.....” you gulped, Kuroo and your team crossing their fingers hoping they would say you.
“Number 1456 Y/N!” You smiled before walking towards the big trophy, Kuroo jumped while screaming, your team and coach started to cheer for you. Once the placing was over you dashed towards your boyfriend, jumping in his arms. Crying of happiness, “I-Won Tetsu! I won!” You squealed while wiping away your tears “Baby! I’m *kiss* so *kiss* fucking *kiss* proud *kiss* of *kiss* you! *kiss*” you giggled from the dozen of kisses before giving him a big hug before running towards your team giving them a hug as well, “You did amazing Y/N!” “We’re so happy for you!” “Amazing!” You smiled at the compliments “Y/N well done, I’m so proud of you!” You coach chirped “Thank you Ms. S/O” you say giving her a hug as well, you then grabbed your boyfriends hand “What now?” You asked in Curiosity, Kuroo smirked. “Well since you won, why don’t we go out for dinner with your family and friends?” You smiled before nodding “I would love to tell them the news.” You hummed before giving him one last kiss before walking towards your dressing room, Kuroo chuckled.
He helped you grab your bags and other dancing materials, you both walked out of the building. Hand in hand walking towards the car, “I’m proud of you baby.” Kuroo hummed giving your head a kiss you giggled before giving his kiss a cheek “Thank you bubs.” You mumble, Kuroo gave you one last kiss to your lips and a smile.
“I’m always proud of you”
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mattieandmatter · 6 months ago
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hi my name is matthew and i have some thoughts about haes
okay disclaimers: i’m a little jumpy around the subject so while i don’t feel i’m being unnecessarily harsh/unfair, if ur firm on haes w no yielding, and you don’t want to argue about it? either skip this or don’t respond. i don’t really care. but i’m putting the body under a read more.
[3k words, 10 minute read. sections headers, some text italicized for emphasis/some readibility. no images/videos, a few links.]
second disclaimer: i’m not planning on going heavy on sources. i will happily provide sources to people who want them, and i haven’t written the actual post yet but it’s unlike me not to cite anything, but doing an in depth well researched and sourced post on this type of subject is not something i’m up for right now.
like i said, i’m jumpy around this subject. and on the off chance someone decides this post is Bad and i must be banished to the Bad Blogs Bin, i’d rather not put a lot of work into it.
third disclaimer: i’m not particularly interested in reading X study that says actually no people who way 700 pounds are healthy and people who weigh less than 200 are going to die early deaths. i know that’s a straw man i needed to a) get it out of the way now and b) i just am tired all the time and don’t have a ton of itme for it. that said, if you do send one to me, i will probably read it at some point, and i may or may not provide my thoughts.
right then. moving on.
with no more waffling, my thesis is as follows: weight stigma is bad, however obesity is killing people and i really would like people to stop pretending it doesn’t.
i. really hate that that’s a controversial opinion. i mean i hold a decent number of somewhat controversial opinions, most of which i keep to myself because i’m a firm believer that what i think about something should not interfere with how other people live their lives. as a noncontroversial example, i think mormons are in a cult. children, being minors, being indoctrinated is a problem, one i myself am not dedicated to solving because i have other issues but as far as adults involved, that’s their business.
(*please note that i’m not expanding on my thoughts because this post is about haes but i do have a more complicated opinion i’m just trying to demonstrate something please don’t at me about cults i know that they’re bad and adults in them also need help getting out that’s not the point of this post & i’m anxious enough so like, please.)
anyway so. obesity. is bad. it is bad for your health. if you are obese, you are not healthy. that said, i am not going to tell you to lose weight. no one should tell you to lose weight except for your doctor and maybe your immediate family, and that should be from a place of “you are not living your best life and i care about you.” i, an internet stranger, along with pretty much everyone you know, does not get to tell you about how terrible your life is and what a horrible person you are for existing, because you are not a bad person for being overweight. you do not deserve discrimination or mistreatment. even if you’re not actively trying to lose weight. it doesn’t matter. you are a human being like any other and i will fight like hell for you.
i’m not planning on going heavy into eating disorders because a) that’s a triggering topic for me and b) it’s going to muddle the point i’m getting, but since it is a large part of the arguments re. haes, it’s certainly going to come up, so i’d like to list the officially recognized eating disorders.
Anorexia Nervosa (AN)
Bulimia Nervosa (BN)
Binge Eating Disorder (BED)
Other Specified Feeding and Eating Disorder (OSFED)
Pica
Rumination Disorder
Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID)
Unspecified Feeding or Eating Disorder (UFED)
Other (aka “we are considering making this its own category but for matthew’s purposes it fits into AFRID or UFED well enough because the details aren’t important”)
so yeah. we’ll circle back to this.
section one: haes
haes initially stood for heatlh at every size. that doesn’t really matter anymore because people say healthy at every size now, however, the distinction is important. because.
okay. when i say being obese makes you inherently unhealthy, i am not saying you are having health problems for being overweight. i am saying you have a chronic illness. i have asthma. that makes me inherently unhealthy. i don’t necessarily have an health problems because i am asthmatic, but i have a chronic illness and it certainly would, say, make me more likely to die from covid. that is a fact. saying healthy at every lung functionality would not change that.
but you know, i can still be active and like smell plants and interact in the world like anyone else. i just try to keep my inhaler near by.
so similarly, if you are overweight/obese (i’ve been saying only obese because its less letters so i’m sticking with that), you can, like, live ur best life and take care of your health. you can feel good about your body and eat good food and move and again, i really don’t want anyone reading this to feel that i think everyone who’s obese needs to lose that weight because adults can do whatever they want.
what i’m angry about is that a good thing (encouraging people to make good choices no matter what so they can feel good in their bodies) got turned into a bad thing (telling people they don’t need to change what they’re doing because they’re perfectly healthy).
section two: but what about...?
see my third disclaimer. but as a fast rundown of things i probably won’t talk about in detail later:
the obesity paradox is a specific thing about a specific type of illness in the elderly. it’s also not about obesity, it’s about being slightly overweight. it’s a complicated thing, but it’s not true most of the time
sumo wrestlers have major health problems as soon as they stop exercising like crazy.
did you know there are countries where girls are force fed to become overweight? diet culture goes both ways
if you want to say healthy at every size, you have to mean that every. that means you are not allowed to say shit about underweight people. i’m sorry, is someone you care about wasting away? are they 5′10 and weigh  90 pounds and their hair is falling out because they aren’t eating? i’m sorry, you said people are healthy at every size. you can’t make fun of skinny people. you have to suck it up because you can’t have your cake and eat it too.
section three: self care
a hypothetical that is blindingly obvious to where i’m going: if a small child wants to play with a knife, are you caring for them by giving into it? what if they want to drink some vodka? what if they want to run away from home to live with a stranger in a white van?
i really really hope all those answers are “no, you’re neglecting that child, and also possibly actively harming it.”
so my point is pretty obvious: giving yourself something because you want it does not mean you are caring for yourself.
you know what i want  to do all the time? sleep and rewatch twilight every day. but that makes me feel worse. so even though it’s terrible and i hate it, i have to take care of myself (because there is only one of me that i ever get) and go outside and talk to people and eat something that isn’t popcorn because you need protein to live.
(sorry i tried to keep nutrition out of that but i have to actively seek out sufficient salt and protein due to my campus doing a lot of low sodium food, which is bad when u actually need to eat a good amount of salt to keep ur body working, and also i’m vegetarian. so i’m constantly making myself seek it out.)
that doesn’t mean self care is always supposed to be work, but i mean. i’ve always not really gotten into it. i think because i’m hella depressed and i’ve been depressed long enough i can recognize it as this separate entity when it comes to a lot of the mental stuff. like, why do i feel like everything is meaningless? that’s just the depression.
but i digress, this isn’t about me. [proceeds to talk about me again]
one phrase i like a lot for myself is “bad food makes me feel bad.” now, i’m not a fan of putting moral judgements to food. but this works for me, personally. sure, eating a bunch of ice cream right now is good, but it’s going to suck when my stomach flips the fuck out because of all the sugar. and so it seems quite obvious to me that eating that ice cream is not, in fact, caring for my body.
and i think we’d collectively be a bit better served if we could learn to distinguish between self-care and self-kindness. ask anyone who does caregiving (childcare, nurses, etc): it is hard, often thankless (at least for children they’re devils who don’t realize that their toys will get wrecked if they don’t pick them up) work. you care for them not by doing what they want, but what is best for them.
section four: diet culture
as i’ve already played my hand up above with underweight vs haes, i think it’s kind of obvious that i have strong feelings about underweight not being healthy also. so i just want to take stock of what is and isn’t diet culture, and what i think about it. this is probably the most subjective part of this essay.
things i think are diet culture
people trying ridiculous diets. obviously diet culture in the purest sense. it’s real dumb. you need all the food groups to live. sometimes it’s okay, like cutting out sugar, but i’d say its a net negative
not trying to do lifestyle changes. that’s the sustainable way to lose weight. so. yeah.
weight cycling. actually still up for debate if this is bad. this paper says no, along with a lot of others, but i’m not sitting down and reading through all of them, and all of the ones that say its bad, to offer my opinion. i’m leaning towards “it’s better than nothing,” but we’ll see
a lot of other stuff i’m doing this off the top of my head and trying to avoid issues w eating disorders so.
things i think aren’t diet culture
women being pressured to look a certain way. that’s been going on for a long time. being skinny used to be bad. it’s a fact of the patriarchy.
most things? idk i have this impression that like, anyone exercising or eating healthy is a part of diet culture, when in reality, people just have different lifestyles. (also, again, if you’re going with haes, as in HealthyAES (hyaes?) you can’t call it unhealthy or you’re not respecting that damn E)
in conclusion: diet culture has issues, but the correct response to them is not “fuck you, i’m eating fourteen pounds of sugar.” eat fourteen pounds of sugar because you want to. (also it should be fat because if you really want to stick it to the man you should be eating fat, big sugar is responsible for a huge amount of todays dietary problems, both on the under/overweight side)
section five: discrimination
yeah no fuck people who discriminate about fat people. that’s all i’m just moving along to a transition since i was drifting away from my point about health.
section six: weight stigma
...is not responsible for your health issues. being obese is. accept the consequences of your lifestyle.
well. okay. that’s a little unfair. accept the consequences of not treating your chronic illness. and i feel i’ve probably lost people for calling obesity an illness but that’s the whole point of my post.
just like carrying externally heavy objects hurts your joints, so does carrying a lot of weight inside. fat does not cushion your organs, it kills them. getting rid of weight stigma will not make these issues go away.
the treatment for obesity is eating the number of calories you need to sustain a healthy weight at your current exercise levels. (*please consult with your doctor this is more complicated when you have to lose a lot of weight.)
section seven: cico. or, why your metabolism is fine
your body does not break the laws of thermodynamics. it cannot magically create more energy out of a given amount of calories.
there are issues with calorie counting, yes. i think it’s usually done in an unsustainable way that isn’t teaching people to make decisions, just to do math. it can be hard to get an accurate count.
but you are not a miracle of science. you have not discovered how to create and destroy energy. i’m sorry to be the one to break if to you.
if you don’t believe me, if you’re really sure your metabolism is different, go on and get it tested. tell your doctors. because it’s a major problem if it’s not working right.
similarly, i’m sorry, but if someone is the same height as you and a (very, like, +- 50 pounds) different weight, and neither of you have exisitng health conditions, you are not eating the same things/doing the same exercise. you have not broken the laws of physics.
possibly, one of you have untreated celiacs or something of the ilk meaning your body is actually malfunctioning. but if that’s true, i excluded you already, so shoo. get out of here and play in the sun with the other kids.
if you don’t believe this, there’s not much i can do to convince you. but i encourage you to count your calories for a month. find some tdee calculators. weigh yourself. make sure you count everything, it all goes down. check the math. (you can do any amount of time but a month is what you need for weight to be meaningful imo otherwise you’re just proving weight fluctuates a lot).
section eight: cico. or, why counting calories is not disordered eating
it can sure be a symptom of disordered eating, and it can certainly make disordered eating worse, but it isn’t an eating disorder.
also, assuming you’re not trying to verify the laws of thermodynamics, i don’t think counting every calorie is necessary. i have approximate values (500/meal, and around 300 in snacks), which i try not to go over or under.
yeah. i actually use calorie counting to make sure i’m eating enough in one sitting. some of my medication screws with my apetite and then i only eat like 300 calories and suddenly its like 11 and i need to go to bed but i’m hungry but eating before bed makes me feel terrible and it sucks.
but hey, according to some people, avoiding that is unhealthy.
okay i’m moving on before i get salty because the next section is touchy
section nine: eating disorders.
the three main eating disorders are listed way up there. they’re the first three. AN, BN, BED.
oh, yeah, binge eating? that’s actually disordered eating too. it’s not normal.
i’m not going to elaborate on the point because i absolutely know i can’t do it without getting really fucking angry that people call calorie counting disordered eating, like i haven’t watched a fifth grader eat one meal a day because she’s scared she’s overweight. like i haven’t watched a sixth grader cram food into his mouth until he’s sick because he’s worried he’s not bulky enough for sports. like i haven’t watched an eleventh grader tell me he hasn’t eaten anything since lunch yesterday, but it’s fine, he doesn’t want his mac and cheese anyway, since he needs to lose weight.
you think someone keeping track of some numbers is an eating disorder? then either you’re lucky enough to never have to deal with eating disorders on a personal level, and i’m very happy for you, or you have, and you should maybe reevaluate that.
alright i’m cutting myself off now whoop.
section ten: intuitive eating
you know, much like haes, i want to like this. it fits in with my bad-food-makes-me-feel-bad mentality. i’m angry and tired and hungry because i ate like, a late breakfast/early lunch and now i need to eat again because if i don’t eat every six to eight hours i have a medical condition that makes me feel like shit (an aside: unless you’ve been told by a doctor, you don’t need to eat every 2-3 hours. unless you’re a child or have an applicable medical condition, you can probably eat one meal a day and be firne.)
but much like haes, it now has a meaning i can’t in good consience endorse. i can’t stand for a movement that tells people who acknowledge weight makes their joints hurt that they just need to keep eating until they feel better.
section eleven: conclusion
i have a lot more thoughts but again i’m hungry. i meant to talk more about IE and my problems with it but maybe that will be its own post.
i won’t say i’m happy to talk about this because i can’t promise i am (see: eating disorder issues.), but i will most likely respond to constructive discussion if someone sees this and wants to. i can also provide sources. i hate going, “sources available on request” but i tried to provide some stuff for some of the heavily disputed/i already had a source for it and didn’t have to dig through google scholar to find information that’s been peer reviewed.
and i do sincerely wish everyone, at any size, that they fracture the disconnect between them and their bodies (oop didn’t talk about that either another time then) & that they find peace with who they are, and that they get to live happy & fulfilling lives.
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bright-mercer · 8 months ago
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So This is The Fic I WroteAbout the Boys
idk what to call it but here it is
Quick warning before you read: parents fighting, implied homophobia, anything else I need to tag lmk
ALSO I listened to Jubilee Line by Wilbur Soot the entire time I was writing it 
I was also asked to tag @crybabyddl so here u go <3
Wasting your time
You're wasting mine
There was something in the air that night. Something that gave the boys a gentle switch of tone. A signal that they were the only family they’d need.
It wasn’t easy managing everything that he was going through. He’d barely been holding on to not only his grades, but the band and his social life. It wasn’t what he wanted to happen. He wanted a nice family dinner with his mom and dad. His dad just had to find out about his next gig. Tension grew around the table and it ended with a regretful “I hate you” spat into the living room.
The next hour was spent in his room. He couldn’t return to the scene, his mom’s gentle weeping could be heard through the hollow door of his room along with his dad’s attempt at reassurance. He stopped staring at the stars he stuck to his ceiling years ago and grabbed his bag. For once, he was thankful his room was on the first floor. He slipped out of his window and started the long, but calming walk to the only place he knew he could go to.  
~~~
Usually, it was easy for him to ignore the muffled screams through the walls of the house. Tonight was different, however. The insults his dad threw at his mom, who he supposedly loved, started to sting a little more than any other day.  He’d tried to muffle it out with a pillow over his ears, even tried humming to drown it out, but no luck. It was frustrating, having to be the only level-headed person in the house.
The longer he was alone with the fighting, the deeper he got into his own head. Whatever was going on outside that door couldn’t be love, he told himself time and time again. Yet, he never seemed to believe it. Just as he started getting trapped in his own head, a gut-wrenching curse was thrown from one parent to the other. That’s when he’d drawn the line. He pulled himself out of his own thoughts and unlocked the window, slipping out into the salty air.
~~~
The disapproving stares from his parents seemed to hit a little harder as he walked into the kitchen wearing the pink hoodie he knew they hated. He pretended not to hear the slur his dad muttered under his breath as he scanned the fridge. The word lingered in the air for a second longer than he was comfortable with. He’d settled for a bottle of water and escaped back into his room, avoiding the two pairs of eyes burning judgement into the back of his head.
He’d tried so hard to be “normal” for them. Until he realized that he was normal, and that they were just bigots. He laid in his bed with his headphones in, Whitney playing through the speakers quietly, afraid that they’d still hear her through the door. No matter how hard he tried, his mind drifted back to the disapproving looks that fell over his parent’s faces the day he’d come out to them. The clouding of his mind seemed to pull him away from his home and out of his window.
Hate to see you leaving
Fate worse than dying
Your city gave me asthma
That's why I'm fucking leaving
Your water gave me cancer
The pavement hurt my feelings
They’d all been suffocating in their own homes. The places they thought were supposed to be their safe spaces...yet they’d never felt truly safe there.
The cold air that hit his face was a gentle reminder of the tears that were slipping down his cheeks. As he pushed the pedals of his bike forward, he’d used the sleeve of his flannel to rid of the trails on his cheeks. His mind kept racing, still. The feeling of regret trickling in, but not deep enough to make him turn back. He’d pushed forward once again, letting go of the handlebars for a moment to simply exist in the calm.
~~~
The trail in the woods definitely wasn’t his favorite, but it helped him sift through his thoughts. The rustling of the trees provided almost a drone that kept him grounded. Of course, it wasn’t his prefered method of releasing stress, but it was the quickest route. So he pushed forward, picking a few leaves off the trees as he passed, tearing them apart so he could do something with his hands instead of picking at his cuticles until they bled.
~~~
The gentle breeze had drawn his thoughts away from the scowls and towards his safe space. He may not have been paying attention to where he was going, but he’d been on this path too many times to count, so it was basically second nature at this point. The passing cars gave no second glance to the seventeen year old they drove past on the highway, all too busy to get to their third party of the night. It didn’t bother him, though. He’d always made up stories for the people driving past.  
Shout at the wall
Because the walls don't fucking love you
Once he’d arrived in the garage, he dropped his bag on the couch and sighed, the stress from the night disintegrating into the concrete floor. He walked further into the garage, not even bothering to turn the lights on. He took a deep breath before kicking a pillow across the room. Pulling off his hoodie, he laid down on the couch, draping it over his chest.
It was silent for a moment before the second boy walked in. “Luke?” he asked softly, unsure if the boy on the couch was asleep.
“Hey, Reg,” Luke answered without even opening his eyes. “Bad time at home too?”
Reggie didn’t even have to answer before Luke was up off the couch, leading him up to the loft of the garage. They laid over the bags of clothing and guitar cases, the small hole in the roof letting moonlight seep through, illuminating the boys’ faces.
“Wanna talk about it?” Luke asked, running a comforting hand over the bass player’s shoulder.
There's a reason
That London puts barriers on the tube line
There's a reason
That London puts barriers on the rails
And he did. For a few minutes, he’d let out every thought that was lingering in his mind for the past month. Some of them not even the reason he left his house that night. But, although he was crying, it was a relief for him. Like any negative feeling that filled his being dissolved into the air above him and left the two with a sigh of relief afterwards.
Their comfortable silence was interrupted by the garage door opening for a third time that night. The blonde immediately noticed the faint sniffles of one of his best friends in the loft. To which he climbed the ladder and joined the pile, trying to hide the fact that he had been crying on the way here.
But, they noticed. And Luke asked him the same thing he’d asked Reggie twenty minutes before. “Do you wanna talk about it?”
There's a reason
That London puts barriers on the tube line
There's a reason
That London puts barriers on the rails
And he spoke his mind. They let him release that tension. It came with some crying and self-doubt, to which they responded with supportive comments and comforting touches. But, he’d started to finally recognize the difference between how he felt about himself versus the way others made him feel. And on his face, a smile broke through for the first time that day.
“What about you, man?” Alex asked Luke, who’d been so generous to let the others pour every piece of themselves out on the floor.
He usually never shared in moments like this. He’d never admit it, but he always wants the others to be okay before he’d ever share what was on his mind.  Even then, he wouldn’t spill the whole story, just enough to make the others content.
And after they’d all spoken their hearts out, they looked at each other. And that was the spark that made them realize. There was another gust of wind that came through the hole in the roof that finally knocked out any negative feelings that were left. Reggie sighed contentedly, leaning further into Luke’s side as he played with his necklace. Alex tapped out a rhythm on his legs, staring through the hole in the roof, the stars laying out a familiar pattern for him to trace in his mind.
The silence ended with a sigh from Luke, “This is the only family we’re ever gonna need,” he explained softly. “There is nobody out there who understands us. Except for us.”
Both Alex and Reggie nodded. Alex laid back against the garbage bag filled with Luke’s clothes. Reggie curled further into Luke’s embrace, a soft sigh of relief escaping from his lips as he let sleep take over. Luke kept his comforting touch continuing for Reggie’s comfort. He waved Alex over to the pile, to which he complied, resting his head in the guitarist’s lap, tapping a different rhythm into his knee. It continued until Alex succumbed to the sleep that had been tugging at his eyelids for the past 15 minutes.  
Luke looked at his two best friends and nodded. Although this wasn’t the family he’d particularly wanted, it sure was the one he needed.
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icecreamkink · 8 months ago
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so i watched cobra kai all in two days and i have so many -
this show has so many cool and smart angles to it, but the same time.... its so stupid oh my god everyone is so dumb literally mr miyagi held all of the braincells in this whole universe 
like i am but at the same time i am not surprised it was made like this, bc in hindsight of course there were hordes of ppl simping over johnny lawrence ....  but it still amuses me that this is like... an Actual Official Thing
ok this will get long so cut it is
how much fun this cast has is super visible and i love it
i rly enjoy how the world was expanded ! i did grow up watching the karate kid movies, so watching how they progressed the world of the movies so organically was pretty cool. it rly feels like its the same universe
i fucking LOVE stories that are largely about a Thing. dancing ,skating, sports its just so thrilling to experience this all consuming relationship people can have with this type of activity? and martial arts are just that much more intense, so yeah, grown ass men kicking each other around at the lightest provocation and a war veteran caring so much abt teen karate is Ridiculous.... but i love it all because thats the intensity i find so thrilling
was kinda surprised with how much im missing mr. miyagi. first because, like everyone is so unhinged jesus christo, it just really throws into relief how much his character grounded the narrative of the movies. but also hes just a really great character
and on that note it rly Gets Me that the show itself aknowledges that and plays that into daniels angst and all the little ways they sorta weave myiagisms into the whole show........ im not getting emotional over this dumb karate dads show OK
related - i really miss hearing ‘daniel-san’ 🥺🥺
ACE DEGENERATE oh god oh no
they really went down the down and out johnny lawrence route huh. like i was always kinda bummed we see kreese choking him and then we never see him again in the movies, and while i love dumpster fire problematic trash himbo ck johnny, its like......................... actually really sad that his life turned out like this fjngn
everytime i hear ‘babes’ and ‘pussy’ i die a little inside. i know thats the point but i am a v cringe easy person, have mercy (ehe)
loved the way they are constantly drawing parallels between johnny and mr. myiagi of all people. hes the handy man of his building that has a bullied kid asking for help and eventually steps up to teach them karate, beats up a bunch of bullies for him, creates a friendship with said kid, estranged from family, drinks his sorrows away, surprisingly one of the least quick to anger characters (which says more about everyone else really but.... Well.), no schemes or ulterior motives hes just tryna vibe here.... oh and ofc magically heals miguel of is asthma apparently. the true disciple.. meanwhile daniel is his usual messy petty self even tho he wants to be mr myiagi so bad 
also interesting about that is how miguels character is a parallel of both johnny and daniel at the same time
overall the parallels in ck are done really well, drawing comparisons and also subverting them constantly. theyre well thought out
THE PARALELOGRAMS
fr tho, the angle being explicitly the cycle of trauma and its effects and how trumatized adults in turn traumatize kids, maliciously or not, is so interesting
but! on the flip side of that, it feels like the writers are getting in their own way @ letting the characters grow. especially this last season. theres only so many times you can do "johnny and daniel are getting along but 5mins later they are (literally) fighting over some dumbass random issue" or "johnny puts in 20% of effort with robby and then gives up" before it gets on your nerves yknow?
i see daniel no longer talks like macchio ingested 15 shots of espresso before every take and idk how to feel about that tbh
interesting tension in daniel, as in, in tkk mr miyagi was there and daniel was frankly, kind of a lil shit, this messy petty spitfire hot tempered sassy kid,(johnny lawrence voice: just... stop being so annoying) but now hes the adult, and he wants to be mr. miyagi... but hes just not, and never will be to his very core and it shakes him and in a way hes trying to find who he is now that he sees himself in a position to be a not! cobra kai figure. i kinda really like that 
plus how that relates to his cobra kai trauma. idk if the writers thought abt it Like That, i think so, but in any case, its interesting bc it seems like daniel has told everyone whod listen about johnny lawrence his Pretty Boy Karate Rival and high school and 84 cobra kai... But. no one seems to know what went on in 85 (or 86? idk) which was just so much worse
like ye og cobras were shitheads, but tkk iii is just two hours of daniel being emotionally and physically tortured. 
like, the third movie is.............chaotic, to put it nicely, and many people ignore it, but the writers clearly didnt. daniels actions are, in a way, responding so much more to the events of tkk iii than to the first movie ie. johnny himself, AND. daniel doesnt rly seem to have dealt with that trauma? he never told sam? doesnt feel like hes ever told amanda? he doesnt even say terrys name out loud? freaks Out over kreese ? the way he reacts to robbys deceit? his FACE when he walks past the new "fear does not exist in this dojo" paint or kreeses photo? hmMm i sense Pain
his fashion tho........... disappointing. where are the flower shirts daniel huh we had one (1) shirt what a tragedy STOP WEARING SUITS ALL THE TIME . also the band ts/grunge bi are a look for johnny but part of me longs for the preppy lovable 80s bully chic johnny lawrence getups
weird that they never used that last moment of karate kid where johnny kinda... snaps out of his anger and hands daniel the trophy almost in tears. like “youre alright larusso, good match” “thanks a lot”  that being their last direct interection seems like itd be perfect fruit for cobra kai but... they just dont. weird. 
especially when, the FIRST SCENE they see each other, suposedly in 30+ years, the first thing to come out of daniels mouth is QUOTE "u still got those golden locks huh?" WHO SAYS SHIT LIKE THAT DANIEL FUCKING SAN 
also amandas immediate reaction "your pretty boy rival?" like. can we talk about the fact that daniel had to have imparted to his wife the very important information that his high school bully/karate rival was like Really Cute and Fucking Hot Actually
 the writers Knew exactly what they were doing and honestly.............. power to them
tkk director voice: and billy was just so cute  
also I was thinking that daniel sounded strangely fond in that first scene, and i wonder if he developed a weird affection for johnny on the grounds that of all of his Karate Rivals johnny was actually the only one who didn’t actively tried to literally kill him
i was actually delightedly surprised with how great the chemistry between them is, like from the get go i am Invested. their rl friendship totally bleeds through and its fantastic
. granted, idiots enemies to lovers friends is my Thing so i am biased  
johnny lawrence: i am down in the dumps, i fucked up my whole life and my sons probably, largely in light of the trauma that the father figure sensei and the philosophy of my karate inflicted on me and all my friends. u know what i should do, as a traumatized, unreliable mess of an adult? teach that same philosophy to some other kids! what could go wrong! 
but really i enjoy the setup of it. i kinda like that i watched it late because, season 1 was johnny setting himself up for failure in a way and it was exciting to watch it all go to shit sjfn
Like. his heart might be in the right place, but theres just.... not a way to teach something like ‘strike hard, no mercy’ and not have it fuck up a kid 
case and point: aisha, miguel and hawk become annoying as all hell over that bullshit in the end of s1, even before shit gets truly fucked up
billys subtle panicked eyes when he sees hawk and miguel fighting dirty in the all valley was SO GOOD especially in parallel with the panic that is so visible in his face in the movie when kreese tells bobby to injure daniel and in the sweep the leg scene 
seen people question wether kreese should have returned and i absolutely think he needed to. johnny needed to realize that cobra kais fundamentals are flawed, at the root, beyond kreese himself being a toxic piece of shit 
also who are we kidding? we are here to see the tkk characters play on new playgrounds!
i get what they're doing abt kreeses backstory, ( also. cobra kai. pq eles caem nas cobras djjs sorry) but did it need to take up that much time? feels like they couldve  done it in half the run time and developed some other stories better 
martin kove has such an evil eye. i love it
love that we get a good follow up to kreese breaks johnnys trophy and tries to CHOKE HIM in the parking lot, which happened in the movie and then....................... was never mentioned again
“the gang is all back together again” aaaa u piece of SHIT 
also. terry silver is definetely appearing ha ha ha PAIN i cant wait
seen ppl say kreese was too much of a cartoon villain like..........................oh......... sweetie........... u dont even Know
interested how johnny will fit into that bc kreese was simping rly hard for johnny here. like i did not expect him to be so adamant to have him with cobra kai ... under his control, sure, but he really wants johnny by his side despite already having control of the dojo and how will terry silver self appointed jon kreeses forever simp going to feel abt that? 
like bitchs dropping by every episode like ‘joooooohnny ..... come bacc to me joooonny......... this ur last warning! for real this time johnny! i wont say it again! watch me ! im leaving johnny! im rly leaving ! im dragging a chair” and johnny is just like. dont let the door hit ya bitch it was so funny pls
and on that subject oof, johnny! doesnt! Know! he doesnt get that side of daniels cobra kai trauma. and i kind of.............. cannot wait for ck 2021 johnny lawrence to meet terry silver like. what a shit show i need a front row seat and popcorn (imagine terry tries some greasy charm and johnny just roundhouse kicks him in the teeth bc he just doest Not Have the Patience for This. glorious)
feels like we, as a society, should acknowledge that cobra kai will never die................ bc their sense of design is just chefs kiss. their name is COBRA KAI. they have sexie sleeveless black gis. theyve sneks. colorful leather jackets with embroided naja insignia, the get ppl thru the aesthetics. evil geniuses
the flashback cuts : masterpiece behavior
the other takes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the movie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the differente angles!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of the FIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE CLOSE UP ON JOHNNYS FACE AT THE KICK 
that scene of daniel and johnny vibing to 80s music in the car. just. oh my god. the fan wish fullfilment. no thoughts head empty.
the new characters! theyre .... good. but. idk. i really like miguel (save for the annoying phase mid s1 - end s2) and amanda, who is a damn riot and has some functioning braincells, but everyone else is       
like dont get me wrong, i dont hate anyone,its not a jane and rafael from jtv situation,  and i am interested and invested in their arcs, but i wouldnt say i like   Like them, as in, personality wise 
like, sams grappling with ptsd was rly gutting and i enjoyed that plus her slight rage issues, 
which nicely parallel torys rage issues. torys background is all over the place tho so im pretty on the fence abt her so far
robby deserves better in every way, and i like how smart and cunning and surprisingly sweet he is
hawk............... is there i guess,
 demetri is annoying in the best way possible,
 carmen is sweet but. i just feel like her character is blunted to make the johnny relationship easier. like when shes furious with him after miguels injury but then forgives him like an episode later? and then convinces him to fight for the tournament bc she had a karate epiphany off screen even tho she was always against it? meh. feels like with the plot thiccening she was swallowed and now shes like a crutch for johnny mora than anything, which is disappointing.
aisha was cool and im kinda mad she wasnt in s3, especially bc a storyline with her tory and sam was like RIGHT THERE , but also... cant say i was super super fond of her... doesnt feel like we ever spent enough time on her
moon the bi icon, 
overall its a good cast but the main draw for me remains the og cast 
the tory/sam miguel/robby Thing. enjoy how theyre Narrative Foils and i like how their stories were so dramatically entangled but oh god give me a break with the teenage love square for the love of god. if u gonna put us through that at least have the decency to not make it so straight
and honestly some sam/tory        miguel/robby romantic tension would even make more sense. just saying! 
also im not sure how i feel abt the cobra kai: red miyagi do: blue theyre going with since some of daniels most iconic looks in tkk are also red. like it was a color they (johnny and him) sorta shared. i get it, opposite but complementary but idk... a little too fire nation and water tribe for me .
 and like the cobra kai kids are so funny abt it bc their outifts grow progressively more ridiculously coordinated. its like do they group chat every morning before leaving their houses? 
robby still sticks out like that tho. he went thru an athleisure/daniel san tsleeves phase and now hes back in the bandts grunge, but his color scheme doesnt fully blend with the other cobra kais. hmmmm.
LOVED LOVED LOVED both the okinawa episode and the cobra kais easy rider episode just such good good heart aching fun
bobby is an icon. he was in tkk and he is now ck hope appears more and more
 tommy is like the most iconic background character. all his lines, freaking gold then and now. sigh :( 
the framing in the okinawa trip was so good everything was so good
i stand by the fact that kumiko was the love interest daniel had the most chemistry with and shes is overall such a joy to watch, loved to see her again, idola, fashion icon
also tkk ii is good u guys are just mean
also really enjoyed chozens role in the episode, his evolution; i love that they introduced the pressure points (ty lee the blueprint) and! the honk + karate! cousins! absolutely iconic
when kumiko reads mr miyagis letters........ oh my god, my eyes FILLED with tears, it was so heart wrenching :(( tamlyns delivery was so emotional and lovely and its so obvious everyone involved in ck has so much love and respect for pat morita and mr miyagi as character, and i adore that it exists like this electric current through the show
when we were watching i told my sister i thought that ali would be miguels big shot surgeon and ngl i am so disappointed that didnt happen. hire me cobra kai writers
also the johnny ali daniel amanda chemistry? off the charts
AND the sassy retconning of daniel and alis breakup! LMAO ‘I HOPE U DIDNT TELL MR MIYAGI IT WAS MY FAULT’ HFDJJGNKFKSD
i am preeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetty sure back injuries dont work like that    but oke
daniel and johnny are so good together whenever, like they never actually help the kids or get shit done and end up fighting anyway but its just so much fun when theyre hanging
JOHNNY LAWRENCE AND DANIEL LARUSSO FIGHTING TOGETHER
daniels “plan” on how to get robby to juvie was so stupid. literally were u TRYING to make him hate you. dumbass
parents at those hearing rly brave for ppl that did not do ANYTHING as their kids got involved in a karate gang war until now
“bullshit i heard u were the real bully!” i mightve screeched
this s3 ending was SO DRAMATIC omg
everyone is such a MESS go to THERAPY u unhinged motherfckers
also im sorry but uh. a richass neighborhood in california doesnt have some type of neighborhood watch? the larussos rly dont have any security at all? neighbors wont hear the sound of a damn karate brawl happening next door??? also wasnt tory all like ooo i cant go to juvie, my mom yada yada yet shes always running around town getting into fights even at the rich girls house she was kicked out of school for fighting??   ?  ??    ??        ?                ?    ?          ??                  ?    ? girl??
stop destroying the larussos house, its so pretty :((((
sam finding her center looking at mr miyagis picture...  uwu maybe
robby yelling ‘U ARE WEAAK’@  johnny \as he is easily blocking him is like.... so funny and so sad to me. sweetheart. 
also i know it was meant as ‘oh johnny pushes him and HURTS HIM’ but it just looks like robby runs himself into the lockers and IM SO SORRY I FEEL SO BAD BUT IT WAS SO FUNNY 
i like that he and tory are the cobra kai kids now. we need ppl we care abt there to not revert to a good vs evil schtick, and this is the most engaging it could be... tho it hurts that these kids cant catch a break
ah yes "lets bet some real shit on the result of this teen karate tournament bc that is always a great idea" is BACK
so daniel saves johnny from kreese..... maybe johnny will save him from terry 🧐
and dojos unite ohohoho. lets SEE how that’ll work out 
miguels face of Despair when the ck defectors and the md kids are bickering like 'this is never gonna work' : gold
also. Johnny Lawrence is gonna learn some myiagi-do karate AHAAHSJAKDFH
 ive been waiting for this moment all my lifeeee oh lawrd 
final thoughts! there are def things i hope the writers will improve on the next season, but i am very excited for it either way AND i feel like it has made me enjoy the movies even more and that is a win for a reboot/sequel to me!!
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atlas-of-a-human-soul · a year ago
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frENEMIES, pt. 3 {Quarterback AU}
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Summary: Locked in the supply closet together, the pair actually manages to resolve some of their issues but new ones arise when they realize the other side of hate is love and while one is willing to accept to cross the fine line, the other one will run scared.
Warnings: angst, swearing, panic attack, sexual innuendos and talk of sex
Part 1   Part 2
"Just stay with me tonight. Okay?" Grayson takes her hand, gingerly pulling her closer and while he wishes he could ignore the turmoil in her eyes, the hesitation in every inch of distance she closed between them, he can't help but wonder if she'll ever stop hating him.
After the past 24 hours they had, he hoped she would find a way. He just wants a chance, a fighting chance to show her he isn't the idiot, dumb jock she sees him as. He can't exactly deny the playboy accusation, but the rest of it wasn't very fair to him. At least he saw it like that.
"I feel like this is a slippery slope. I stay tonight and we...what? Have sex? Maybe just cuddle? Or talk? Next thing I know, you'll catch feelings and I don't really see how that would be good for either of us." Biting her lower lip, she grabbed a fistful of his shirt, not in a violent or sexual way, just as a way to ground herself, to find a footing in the insanity of her actually considering willingly being around the man she hated for years. And her hate wasn't unfounded.
"Don't worry, my sneaky little princess. That's not going to happen. At least not to me, but I can't promise anything on your behalf. I'm quite the charmer, ya know?" Chuckling as she pushed him back with all her might, Grayson lands on the bed with a throaty laugh she found quite pleasant. However, when Grayson told her nothing of the sort would happen, he forgot to mention it's because it's too late, at least for him it is - he already caught feelings.
How this came to be, you may ask? Last time we left these two, love was the last thing on their mind...at least for Y/N.
Well, it all started with a push from a very bald Ethan who decided to lock the frENEMIES in a room.
"Seriously?!" Y/N pounded on the door as she realized she's stuck and the only reason why that happened is because she wanted to make amends with Ethan and Amina. That's what happens when you're trying to be nice.
Ever had a big fight with your best friend and actually have them be right but you just won't admit it? Y/N sure as hell found herself in a lot of trouble with her best friend when Ethan got caught in the crossfire and while she apologized to Ethan, profusely, Amina was just done with her. It hurt when she chose to side against her even before the incident that left her boyfriend without hair. Isn't your best friend supposed to have your back?
Ethan forgave her, or so she thought before he gave her and Grayson a push before locking them up in the supply room on campus and while Y/N pounded on the door, she realized she was doing that all on her own. She figured the ostentatious, loud quarterback would be breaking the door down by now and yet she found no resistance on his behalf...just silence.
Frowning, she turned to the unusually quiet Grayson only to find him in the corner of the room, eyes wide open, heaving.
"Dude, you good?" She really didn't want to come closer and check but when he shook his head no, she felt her heart start pounding. The last thing she needed is him having an asthma attack now, because he might think she didn’t notice, but she saw him hiding the inhaler in his bag after taking a few puffs and while she didn’t understand why he’s ashamed of that, she didn’t say anything. Just as he’s hiding his dyslexia, something she didn’t know about until the dinner they were forced to have and he stared at the menu as if it was in a foreign language before asking his brother in their ridiculous twin language what to order. 
"Why? What's happening right now?" Carefully, she approached him because he seemed freaked out as it is and she had no idea how he might react to her in this moment.
"Not a fan...of closed spaces." Managing to explain through a few quick breaths, he had closed his arms around his folded knees and for the first time in forever, she saw Grayson fucking Dolan isn't invincible. She’s become all too aware of that.
"Oh." She let nothing else pass her lips as she sat right before him, chewing her bottom lip with her eyebrows furrowed and her nose crinkled as she pondered what she could do to help him. If a man as big as him freaks out in such a small room, she might not be quite safe. Would he ever hurt her?
"Why is football so important to you?" And that's when she spoke up, this time with a question she hoped would help keep his mind occupied, derailing the possible panic attack he seems to be facing. She knew all about panic attacks for they've tormented her since she was eighteen. She knew he feels vulnerable and terrified and she wanted to give him a chance to talk about what he loves, is confident in and is also passionately involved in. It’s not something she talks about, just as he doesn’t talk about his asthma and dyslexia. 
"Huh?" Grayson looks at her, his lips quivering, his chest hurting and his heart hammering against his cheat and he couldn't believe he was breaking in front of the girl that hates him more than anyone ever has and he could already see her using this against him.
"Tell me. I want to understand." But there is no malice in her voice and the way she looks at him is...merciful. She's never been this nice to him and for a moment, he can't help but wonder why. Why would she care?
"Please." The softness in her tone is enough to make him trust her. Maybe it's because he wanted to trust her with all his heart regardless, but he found himself speaking to her about what he never talked about to any girl...only to very few people in his life that mostly included his family.
"My dad. It was sort of our thing. He was the most supportive...It....Playing football makes me feel closer to him. I guess I just want to make him proud. Besides, I love the attention. I do. I love when they cheer for me, when they pat me on the back after a win and most of all, I love how powerful I feel on the field." Rubbing his chin absentmindedly, he flashed her a smile, the cocky one she usually saw on his face and it lifted a weight off her chest she felt ever since she saw the great quarterback cradling himself in a state of sheer panic.
It almost breaks her heart to see him that way, because having your mind and body betray you like that is an indescribable feeling to know you can't trust yourself anymore. Despite all the voices in he read screaming at her not to, she reaches out, placing her hand over his so tenderly he thought he imagined her touch.
"Awe, you actually care!" Grayson cooed teasingly and she rolls her eyes, scooting away from him a little, taking her hand with her.
"Bite me, quarterback." And while they were definitely having a moment, he couldn't help but wonder if he could use this time to learn why she really hates him.
"Ooh, kinky! Where?" Winking at her, Grayson purses his lips and her exasperation is evident but he can't let her leave without at least some truth being revealed.
"So, I have a question." He says with a small smile and she raises an eyebrow at him, her left eye narrowing ever so slightly at him.
"I don't care." Sassing back, she turns her body away from him, trying to hide from his over-analyzing stare. His eyes, the way he looks at her always makes her feel naked. It's intense and it's unveiling and frustration and she didn't want any of it right now. She’s always had trouble with emotional connections and anyone getting too close made her nervous and Grayson particularly made her want to run away screaming.
"You asked one question, I get to ask one too. So...why do you hate me? I mean, I can't even understand what I did to you that's so bad...except for the eyebrows sophomore year BUT it was an accident and I apologized to you at least a hundred times." Looking over at him, her glare is clearly showing his jokes are not entertaining and she's had enough but if it means he'll shut up, she'll tell him.
"You stole my first kiss without even asking me the first time we met." She states through gritted teeth and the horror and confusion on his face is baffling to her. "Don't pretend otherwise. We were talking and I actually liked you before you thought it would be okay to just kiss me out of the blue before running off to puke in the bathroom."
"I SWEAR I", he was going to say he doesn't remember but it all sounded too familiar and he...well, he thought he dreamt that.
"Oh, God! I'm sorry! I was drunk off my ass that night and it was the first and last time I got drunk. I swear I thought I dreamed it. I really am an asshole." Running his hands through his luscious locks, Grayson hid his face as he wondered how the fuck did he forget about kissing Y/N fucking Y/L/N.
"Then there's the time you told Mike I was a snake and to stay away from me." She continues but he was shocked there's more than one reason and while he does remember doing this, she took it out of context.
"You got that all wrong. Mike was bragging around, saying he banged you and I was telling him he's a snake and I'd break his jaw if he keeps talking shit about you. He wasn't the guy for you. He just wasn't and I'm not sorry for that. I just wish you talked to me before assuming the worst of me." Leaning back against the wall, Grayson held her gaze fiercely. This was no time for weakness, he had to be brave and face her and make things better. It's been years and he...well, he's always had a thing for her.
One night stands were fun, but no girl ever challenged him nor intrigued him like her. She was so unapologetically herself, so beautiful even without trying and her mind works in such interesting ways that he was always in awe of her opinions, of her writing, of the way she sees the world.
"Alright...then how about when you conditioned the university to take Ethan on a full football scholarship or you wouldn't be going here? Did you ever wonder who you cost their lifelong dream? Because I know the guy who lost his spot and now he works at a gas station. And he deserved a lot better."
That was unexpected to say the least. If he were completely honest, it never crossed his mind someone might get cut when he insisted Ethan be accepted with him. Mostly because it was the only way for them to stay together and to be close to their dad in his final years.
"I didn't. I didn't think, I just felt. And it was wrong. I know that. But it also gave me and my brother a few more years with our dad and I'm sorry your friend got screwed over but I can't be sorry about why I did it. Just that I did it." Swallowing thickly, he watched her nibble on the lower left corner of her lips, her eyes falling to the ground and he could see the wheels in her head turning. She's overthinking, probably conflicted with what he told her and while it's not right, he knows she understands it.
"There were a bunch of pranks there as well, but these were the major reasons." She finishes, her eyes still fixed on the floor, unblinking and with a deep breath, Grayson moved closer to her.
"I'm really fucking sorry for hurting you, but I never meant to do any of those things. I just want to be your friend."
Chuckling, she finally blinks and looks up at him with more light in her eyes than he ever saw her looks at anyone but Amina with.
"Riight."
"I won't lie, I'm attracted to you, but I'd settle for friendship for now." Risking it, he places a hand on her back, craning his neck so he'd be in her line of sight for she turned her head away from him as soon as he started speaking, but she didn't fight his touch and that was encouraging enough.
"How about we make a little bet? Start this friendship right? Like...come to my next game and if we win, I get to ask anything of you. If we lose, you can ask me never to talk to you and I'll oblige. Is that good?" Expecting her to refuse, drowning in all the things he wants to tell her but he can't not yet.
He can't tell her he saw how her style evolved from wearing all black to actually having a colorful wardrobe. He saw the ring she ways wears on her right index finger and how she twirls it nervously before every exam or how she hates high heels but would still wear them to parties only to take them off an hour in. He saw how she struggled with her back in the second semester of freshman year, right after she fell on ice on the first day after the holidays. He knows she can't take a compliment but appreciates them, how she gets so involved with every book she reads that she makes the most beautiful faces when something interesting happens - she laughs, she cries, she loves the characters and after every book, it takes her a few days to remind herself it's all fictional, to say goodbye before finding a new book to obsess about. He also knows she has a waterfall as the background on her phone and that she wants nothing more than to visit Bali and Australia. He knows so much, yet so little and a from just observing her when she thought no one cared.
Grayson cared and he still does. He can't imagine a day he doesn't.
"Sure. Why not."
And as she agreed, the door opened and there was nothing better than the fresh air in their lungs after being stuck in there for what felt like forever.
However, Grayson won that game the next day and Y/N found herself actually cheering him on from the stands. It was definitely a new experience, but she didn't care. She didn't want to hate him anymore. It's exhausting to hate a guy who seems to be so painfully human that it's inspiring. There's nothing wrong in being human, in making mistakes and she decided to let go of his. As hard as it is, she had to. She couldn’t hate him forever, not when she knew his reasons and when she knows her friend had other choices and he gambled them all on his own.
"You really asked me to come to your room like that's not weird at all." She folds her arms over her chest and she can't help but be surprised with how tidy it is or the smell of wildflowers that fills her nostrils, she actually never imagined this is how his room would be. And she definitely didn't expect a keyboard in his room. He was full of surprises, the good kind.
"Just stay with me tonight. Okay?" Grayson takes her hand, gingerly pulling her closer and while he wishes he could ignore the turmoil in her eyes, the hesitation in every inch of distance she closed between them, he can't help but wonder if she'll ever stop hating him.
After the past 24 hours they had, he hoped she would find a way. He just wants a chance, a fighting chance to show her he isn't the idiot, dumb jock she sees him as. He can't exactly deny the playboy accusation, but the rest of it wasn't very fair to him. At least he saw it like that.
"I feel like this is a slippery slope. I stay tonight and we...what? Have sex? Maybe just cuddle? Or talk? Next thing I know, you'll catch feelings and I don't really see how that would be good for either of us." Biting her lower lip, she grabbed a fistful of his shirt, not in a violent or sexual way, just as a way to ground herself, to find a footing in the insanity of her actually considering willingly being around the man she hated for years. And her hate wasn't unfounded.
"Don't worry, my sneaky little princess. That's not going to happen. At least not to me, but I can't promise anything on your behalf. I'm quite the charmer, ya know?" Chuckling as she pushed him back with all her might, Grayson lands on the bed with a throaty laugh she found quite pleasant. However, when Grayson told her nothing of the sort would happen, he forgot to mention it's because it's too late, at least for him it is - he already caught feelings.
"Seriously, what exactly am I doing here, quarterback? Expecting to get lucky?" She couldn't shake it though, that annoying feeling it was more than she could imagine. The way he is around her is just...disarming and equally alarming. She can't get too close. She just can't love him. Grayson Dolan is a womanizer and she'd be damned if she gives a man like him her heart.
She’s never loved anyone and she didn’t want her first love to be a guaranteed heartbreak. She wasn’t a part of the hookup culture, she didn’t know how to function in that world and she refused to learn. And while Grayson might have good intentions, he’d be onto the next one in the month. It’s all fun and games when they’re just flirting and annoying each other, but to actually involve her heart? It terrified her, pushed her body on an invisible ledge she didn’t want to jump from. 
"Do you really think I brought you here for sex? I mean...I don't want to be presumptuous, but why would you come here if you think that's the reason why? Do you want to have sex?" Sitting up with the notion that this is a more serious conversation, Grayson quickly took a look at her and she was fidgeting, nervous as if...as if she never had sex.
"No. I just...I don't know, I'm not exactly the type that does this." Raising both his eyebrows, he realized he is right. His little devil is actually an angel. A fallen angel like Lucifer, but an angel nonetheless.
"I didn't bring you here for sex. I just wanted us to talk and...actually sleep next to each other. I can sleep on the floor if you want me to." As sweet as it is, she still couldn't relax. A man like him didn't seem quite content with nothing happening and she...well, she never slept next to a man before let alone more.
Overthinking took over and she found it harder and harder to breathe as her heart picked up speed and the possible outcomes of this night started to freak her out to the point of losing focus, losing touch with reality. The world felt like it moved too fast, her brain couldn’t fully comprehend anything around her. She found herself back in the black pit where a panic attack was preying on her like vultures pray on those lost in the desert.
"Y/N...are you...are you scared of me?" His voice breaks as reality sets in and he can tell she's shivering, her arms wrapped around her as she glances at the door every few seconds. But he had no expectations of that night but a long talk and getting to know her better. He just wanted to show her who he is, but she didn't seem to believe that.
"Look, I'm not like you. I didn't sleep around. I had my first kiss in college with you and I tried dating a few guys after who somehow all ghosted me once they started hanging with you and I'm guessing they were a versions of Mike so thank you, but I never had sex, I've never even held hands with a boy before! I can't do this. I just can't." And before he had a chance to react, she was gone. His beautiful mischievous girl ran from him and this time it wasn't because she hated him, but because she realized she might actually care for him.
Tags: @mendesficsxbombay​​​ @beinscorpio​​​ @peacedolantwins​​​ @dolandolll​​​
PART 4
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dizzeeflower · 5 months ago
Text
astra zeneca covid vaccine side effects - 1st dose
cw/ detailed discussion of medical symptoms, mention of vomit, covid mention
i got my first dose of the vaccine at 10am on saturday 3rd april. it was the oxford astra zeneca vaccine. for the record im 22 years old with asthma
here's an hour by hour diary of the side effects i personally experienced. these side effects are all considered typical of this specific vaccine
side effects hour by hour
the shot: didnt hurt a bit! the flu jab hurts more
in the first 2 hours after the shot i was pretty peppy abt getting rhe shot and made a batch of cookies when i got home but realised i didnt want to eat any, i put it down to not being hungry
3 hours after the shot i had a bagel and felt very nauseous after but didnt throw up
4 hours after the shot and i started feeling random aches in my hips and upper back and suddenly didnt have any energy so i crawled into bed
5 hours after the shot i got a headache. nothing too intense, the kind of headache u get if u didnt sleep enough last night. i also started getting chills despite no temperature drop, put on more layers and crawled under three blankets
6 hours after the shot my entire body started aching. the pain was about a 6/10 altogether so somewhat manageable. also my knuckles started really aching and i thought that was weird
7 hours after the shot i had drunk a litre of water so far which i rlly never do and still needed more. this is when a feverish feeling kicked in, but no actual fever. the body aches were the same pain level but i suddenly had so much less energy that i couldnt get up from bed anymore. trust me i tried
8 hours after the shot the pain was at a solid 7.5/10. i couldnt pick up my switch lite, i couldnt flip mysef over in bed, i couldnt turn my head without wincing
9 hours after the shot the pain was consistent, but my friend made me laugh on voicecall and it hurt so much that i whimpered in pain and started crying. at this point i had an actual fever. unfortunately i dont have a thermometre, but my chest and back and face were burning up. no sweating though, and i had an ice lolly to try to cool down.
10 hours after the shot i threw up said ice lolly and it absolutely killed my body... 8/10 for pain after that. also got some ringing and pressure in my ears but im not sure if that was from the strain of throwing up
11-13 hours after my shot are blurry. The pain got a lot worse at maybe a 9/10. i physically could not stop from crying and wincing and yelling in pain. i wasnt even moving, the pain was just throbbing and stabbing. mostly in my lower back, the back of my head behind my ears, and my hips. i think i got a little bit delirious. i took paracetamol at this point
14-15 hours after my shot i fell asleep for an hour and woke up drenched in sweat. despite the fever, the pain was briefly at a 4/10 which was pleasant. i stayed awake for a while talking to my friend then fell asleep again but not for too long, maybe two hours
18 hours after my shot i woke up again, this time absolutely freezing and shivering so much my teeth were chattering. pain was a 6/10. the site of the injection was swollen and very painful. when i accidentally leaned on my phone with it it felt like i was being jabbed with a needle
19-20 hours after my shot the pain got progressively worse very quickly. it went from a 6 to a 9 again. i panicked a little bit as i didnt have anyone around to help me. (if you are getting the shot make sure you have someone on call just in case u get to this point.) i took more painkillers
21 hours after my shot the pain was at a 7/10 an hour after the painkillers. not pleasant at all, but at least i stopped yelling and crying. my fever was gone but i still felt feverish and was sweating a lot. my head was still throbbing especially behind my ears. by this point id had 2.5 litres of water since my shot - please remember to drink plenty it does help
- that's where im at now, i will reblog with updates -
side note: my mum (49 yrs old, heathy but has smoked for decades) got the same shot at the same time as me literally in the same room. her side effects were later onset than mine (starting around the six hour mark) but they quickly caught up to mine to the point where we were both throwing up at the same time.
the intensity of both our side effects were exactly the same. she was also sobbing and whimpering with the pain at the same time i was (which was honestly rlly hard to hear)
the takeaway
GET THE FUCKING VACCINE this has in no way deterred me from the vaccine or made me regret it, if anything its made me so thankful ive got it because if this is what just the vaccine is doing to me, i honestly cant imagine how excruciating having the actual virus would have been
this is temporary and thats comforting. like it SUCKS im in so much pain, ive not been in this much pain since i had a two week long flu years ago. but this is firstly nowhere near as awful as getting severe covid would be. and secondly its only going to last for a couple days max and its so worth it to know that in a few weeks i'll be helping to stop the spread of this virus just for a few days of fever and bodyaches
please dont let the possibility of a bad experience with side effects deter you from the vaccine. im a complete baby and am terrified of pain and this is pretty scary but nowhere near as scary as my realisation when i was hearing my mum crying from the pain of the vaccine, that i dont know how severe it would have been had she caught the actual virus. i can feel this pain and hear hers and KNOW that it will be over and will make us healthier in the long run. if she was crying from the pain of the live virus, i dont think i would be able to handle it
get vaccinated
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xandertheundead · a year ago
So like.... Greaser!Eddie and nerd!Richie. Eddie became very rebellious because of mother dearest, and kinda just had a thing for dorky lil Richie. And Richie is just like HoT diGGiTY DamN for Eddie
I tried, Anon! I hope you like it!
Richie gasped loudly, having to stop when the cramp in his side started to feel like he was being stabbed repeatedly with some kind of combat knife. His chest started to hurt too and he waved over at Mr. Shaffer and he could see the man give a sigh and wave him over. Richie limped over pathetically and pushed his glasses up his nose as Mr. Shaffer put his hands on his hips and looked him over.
“Tozier, you have barely made two laps.”
“I know,” Richie whined and tried not to move too much or his ribs would give him a shock of pain. “But I literally feel like my lungs are going to explode.”
Thanks, Smokers Lung.
Mr. Shaffer sighed. “Your lungs aren’t going to explode, Tozier.”
“You don’t know.” Richie replied, his breathing coming slightly easier. “I could be the first case of exploding lungitis.”
He didn’t miss the way Mr. Shaffer his mouth behind his hand, knowing he had cracked the man even just a little. Richie counted it as a win. When Mr. Shaffer pulled his hand away he gave a sigh and then nodded his head, motioning towards the bleachers behind them.
“Go sit up there for the rest of class, but I’ll have to give you a C for the running portion.”
“Absolutely Mr. S.” Richie gave him a weak salute and moved to find the spot where he wanted to sit. When he heard the sound of laughter, he looked up to see the boy who had been plaguing his dreams for the past five years.
Eddie Kaspbrak.
The small boy who had asthma and would always yell at Richie about germs had grown and flourished into something no one had expected. The small Losers club they had started had started to drift apart in middle school when everyone was trying to learn their place as gangly preteens and Bill, Bev and even Stan started to ‘date’. But the big kicker was when Eddie Kaspbrak finally gave his mom the big F U and just went wild.
He traded in that side part comb over he’d had for years for letting it go free, the thick wavy hair surprising Richie and making something in his stomach twinge.
By eighth grade Eddie had gotten rid of the khakis and polo shirts, trading them in for more form fitting jeans and white t-shirts that he would tuck into his pants, sometimes a flannel over it or a leather jacket that made Richie want to die.
By sophomore year, Eddie had become a true greaser, hair slicked and combed into the perfect style, the swagger that told people what they thought and didn’t give a damn. He even had his motorcycle license and according to rumor he had started to fix up some old one he’d found at the junkyard.
Eddie had always been good with cars and stuff.
Eddie now was lounging against the nosebleed bleachers, dark black sunglasses on his face and when he saw Richie look, a devilish smile grew on his face that made Richie gut churn and his body run hot. Because here was the thing, by the end of sophomore year when Eddie’s transformation had finished, the new confidence he had showed in so many ways. He had started talking to Richie more than the passing greeting or head nod, soon talking turned into...flirting, which had blown Richie out of the fucking water.
He’d always loved Eddie. Even as a little kid, that was his friend, and when they grew apart that love never really went away, but as Richie grew older and figured things out about himself, that distant love grew with the mix of attraction in there too. Eddie’s flirting felt good, exciting and Richie hoped it meant something more than just a cocky boy having fun.
He gave Eddie a small wave and his heartbeat sped up when Eddie motioned for him to come over. Richie glanced back, but Mr. Shaffer was busy ordering the other kids to keep going so Richie quickly made his way up the stairs. When he got up there he wanted to groan because Eddie was smoking and the filter was just barely resting in his mouth.
It made Richie want to stare at those lips for days.
“Heya, Eds.”
Instead of the red cheeks and angry look Eddie used to give him when he said that, Eddie just grinned before taking a drag and blowing it out slowly.
“Hey, Richie.”
“How’s that asthma treating you?” Richie asked, a grin showing on his face as Eddie raised an eyebrow behind those dark shades. All the losers knew Eddie didn’t have asthma, it had been some fucked up way of his mom’s to keep her thumb on him.
“Oh, it’s treating me just fine. Being fake and all.” Eddie pushed his sunglasses down a little so he could look at Richie over the top of them. “How’s marching band and drama club treating you?”
Richie knew it was a jab at his ultimate nerd-ness, but he somehow knew there was no actual cruelty in the words and he gave a shrug. He didn’t care if he wasn’t popular or cool, he liked what he was doing in school so who cares.
“It’s good. We are doing One Who Flew Over the Cucokoo’s Nest for the fall play.”
“You going to try out?”
Richie gave another shrug. “Yeah, probably. Gunna try and wear those sweet white scrubs.”
Eddie gave a soft laugh, taking another drag before offering it to Richie. Richie glances back down at Mr. Shaffer, the man still not looking so he quickly took it and took a decent drag, trying not to think about how it was damp from Eddie’s lips. He handed it back and Eddie nodded to his outfit before taking the almost gone cigarette back.
“I think you’ll pull them off better than you pull off the red and white of our proud Derry High’s gym uniform.”
Richie’s cheeks warmed a little, suddenly aware of how visible his legs were bare where the shorts cut off and his Rocky and Bullwinkle socks stood proud.
“Yeah well, we can’t all be you with those red and white shorts.” Richie joked, feeling a little dumb when Eddie narrowed his eyes a bit. “Sorry, I just remember you used to wear them all the time.”
Eddie was quiet for a moment, taking the last drag off his cigarette before flicking it off the bleachers. When he spoke Richie almost didn’t hear what he said it was so soft, but he had and the words made him blush.
“I still have those. Kind short and tight now, but I’d be willing to show you if you want.”
“You’re going kill me, Spaghetti.” Richie breathed and he almost died when Eddie’s cheeks started to redden. 
That was their game. This obvious attraction towards each other, but neither really trying to step out of their comfort zone because neither wanted to risk being turned down. Which was weird, because when they were little Eddie had always been the brave one and now he looked the part too.
It frustrated Richie to no end.
He opened his mouth to say something when he heard Mr. Shaffer yell his name. Richie turned to see his gym teacher waving him down, not looking impressed at all that he was talking to one of the schools delinquents instead of resting like he said he was going to.
“Coming!” He yelled back, turning back to Eddie with a regretful look. “I gotta…”
Eddie nodded. “Yeah. Sure.”
“Tozier!”
“Okay!” Richie gave Eddie a wave and started back down the bleachers when he suddenly got the craziest urge, feeling like he was going to combust if he didn’t follow through with it. He quickly turned back around, Eddie now at least seven bleacher steps above in, and cupped his hands around his mouth. 
“Kaspbrak! Go to homecoming with me!”
Eddie sat up straight at that, his sunglasses slipping completely off his face as he stared in shock down at Richie, Mr. Shaffer yelling even louder now.
“You asking me on a date?” Eddie called back and Richie couldn’t stop grinning.
“Only if you wear those shorts!”
Eddie laughed, a full loud laugh like he used to when they were kids and god it was amazing. 
“I’ll think about it!”
“Tozier! Get down here now!” 
“Don’t make me wait too long, Grease Lightning!”
Eddie laughed again. “Go away, Tozier!”
Richie turned around and jogged back towards his class, not caring how mad Mr. Shaffer was because he was pretty sure he had a date with Eddie Kaspbrak.
Send Me A Prompt!
Taglist: @tinyarmedtrex @oldguybones @queen-sock @constantreaderfool @all-beef-no-derry @eddiefuckinkaspbrak @recycle-byn @s-s-georgie @mars-14 @inthebreadbinwrites @yikesitsrylee @thorn-harvester-ven @appojoos @photoboothreddie @moonlightrichie @madi-main @nancynwheeler @edstozler @stylesmelon @reddieforlove @lifesucksheres20bucks @marsisaplanetyall @trashmouthnick @girasol-eddie @s-onora @rebecca-the-queen @purplepoisonedgem @darkobsidianquill
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deniigi · 10 months ago
So this has been keeping me up at night- in technicolors theres the one chapter w the whole collar buisness and the stations. It was talked about but nothing ever hapoened so i have this question; if peter DID wear a collar, what do u think would happen? Ik peter was kinda like Steve in the aspect of skinny w a kinda shit immune system (obvi not to the same level as Steve) but would his eye sight start to get worse and his asthma come back?
If Peter got collared then he’d be in a bad place because on top of his existing issues (the myopia, the asthma, etc) I think he’s got a fuckload of scar tissue and bone fractures and growth, on top of some serious mental health problems that his mutation sort of acts as an anti-depressant/anti-anxiety pill for (it takes the edge off, but it doesn’t fix anything)
I also personally think that Peter’s always hiding and healing injuries, so he’d have half-healed issues to deal with.
So we’re looking at a kid covered in scar tissue, with bones that have not been properly set in some places and have healed hard despite that, who has fractures, deep bruises, and lacerations in the middle of healing, who is nearsighted and asthmatic, and who has a serious fucking case of PTSD and claustrophobia.
If his skin and bones weren’t hardened to the point where he couldn’t move them more or less comfortably, he’d be like he was before, except with major anxiety. But he’d also have new problems because since receiving his mutation, Peter’s had to learn how to change the way that he interacts with the world, i.e. superstrength means that he can’t just grab or touch things, he has to be extremely careful and gentle. He has to walk in such a way that he doesn’t set off his sticky-responses. He’s got to adjust to having to be more aware because he doesn’t have the spider sense reminding him to check for hazards.
Basically, even if his body isn’t fucked up then his way of understanding and existing in the world still shifts dramatically in majorly disorienting and anxiety-inducing ways.
Add on top of that that’s he’s like 16yo and going through all of this and you have a recipe for a shut/melt down waiting to happen.
Hope that helps anon!
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herstarburststories · a year ago
Text
Quarantine Boredoom (Dick Grayson x Reader)
✾ A/N: It’s been a certain couple of months since I wrote smut/erotica, but here you go! Although, I think it’s better classified as silly porn aka Nightwing’s type? Anyway! Thanks to my friend for being my beta for this one.
✾ Request: hiya! i saw that your requests are open and then i had a mini asthma attack because i had come back from binge reading your masterlist oops,,,,that got me thinking,,,how funny would it be if reader has asthma and just has to use their puffer during sex? like could you imagine if that were to happen to dick or jason? i’d like to see that happen 👀 also your writing is absolutely amazing!!! keep up the good work!! 💕👌🏻🤠
✾ Disclaimer: fingering.
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A purposefully loud huff escaped your lips when your body met Dick's couch. He looked away from the copy of Robin Hood in his hand to raise an eyebrow, but the only response he received was a dramatic sigh.
"(Y/N), are you okay?" Bludhaven's protector ultimately asked, placing his book on the desk to offer his girlfriend unrestricted attention.
"I’ve never been so bored in my life," you grunted, tilting your head in one of your best dramatic performances. "Quarantine isn’t as fun as it looks in the movies."
"I'm sure zombies will appear and we’ll convert to cannibalism soon, (Y/N). Don't worry," Dick replied, humor obvious in his tone. You rolled your eyes, huffing once more. "Also, it’s only been two days. You can't be that bored, right?"
"Easy for you to talk, Nightwing. You still go out on patrol every night. Something you shouldn't do, by the way." You changed the subject of conversation, returning to a topic which you and Dick widely disagreed. Fortunately, the acrobat had an idea of ​​how to entertain you and change the subject to something less likely to end up with him sleeping in the room he currently resided in.
"You know I can’t abandon my role, (Y/N). Especially at a time like this. I take the necessary precautions, like using my sticks instead of punching them in the face, don't worry." His patented wink was followed by the classic playful smile. Before you could rationalize the joke, he continued, "But I might have a hint of ​​how to get you rid of your boredom..."
The suggestive tone in his speech caught your interest instantaneously. "I would love to hear your idea, Dick Grayson."
Grayson's next words evaporated upon his lips, giving space to a malicious smirk as his body leaned over yours on the couch. His mouth easily found its home; your lips, into the slow, lazy beginnings of a kiss.
When you drink for the first time, it is easy to get drunk. Then, you start drinking on more occasions and your limit increases. Two glasses are needed when, a while ago, it would take just one. The organism gets used to it and needs more to achieve the sensation of the first time. With Dick, it always felt like the first time. It didn't matter if he had kissed you two minutes or two months ago; every single touch of him reached a new layer of everything good that someone could transfer to another person, like discovering a new exciting part of yourself.
His hand cupped your cheek, drawing you closer in. The world existed outside that apartment, each minute still had sixty seconds, and Dick Grayson was willing to spend all of them making your body reach a new level of highness for him, without even needing more doses of change to do so. Your heart felt like it was tied to his touch and his only. Dick's hand slowly fell down on the side of your face. His thumb pulled down your lower lip, a farewell present in the intense softness of the gesture.
You giggled, and Richard smiled at you. The playful fingers began their private journey in search of paradise itself on earth. More murmurous kisses were offered as bargain and readily accepted by you. It was a small distraction from the new heights your body was reaching.
Fingers from your chin to jaw, his tongue found yours and caressed it as if he were trained for it. Kissing him was like a dance, it always had been. Grayson's hand stopped on your neck for a moment, but there was no trace of pressure there. Dick just kept dancing, holding on; you wanted to wrap your legs around him, offer some comfort to your wet pussy, even if it was just pressing it against his erection, which was now hard against your leg, to make his self-control more difficult. Yet, you knew better than that. He would have already pulled your legs if that was the plan. His fingerprints on your chest indicated the antics the hero wanted to use.
Dick placed his lips on your neck, lavishing attention upon that spot as much as he wanted. You closed your eyes, unable to decide what you liked most: the bites and gentle suction on your neck or the tender fingers that were already on your stomach. Your hips moved of their own will, seeking the carnal solace you craved as you moaned softly. The former Robin laughed in pleasure at your neediness, moving away from his little branding job to look you in the eyes. He loved to watch you like this, spreading your legs for him while his hand found its way inside your pants.
And now, looking at you and feeling wetness in your panties, Dick decided to keep it a bit slow, as if to see how far you would go. After all, it had been three long weeks without sexual activity. Between his work of detective division vigilante and yours in full-time journalism, 24 hours weren't always enough, but in this moment, all he had to worry about was how needy for him you could get.
Grayson's digits circled your vulva, playing on the edges of its outer lips until he received an impatient sigh from you. He laughed, temporarily satisfied. You looked at him, ready to tell him to do what he knew how to do, but you were silenced by one of his fingers entering your vagina. You pressed your lips together and pushed hips towards him, a nonverbal way of saying that you wanted more. Dick, however, just moved his finger out of your reach. It caused you to open your eyes, stunned.
"Dick!" You were breathless, probably from the rush of sensations he had been — and was supposed to still be — making you experience.
"What?" There was false innocence in his voice that contradicted everything that was happening, especially when he took the finger that was inside you to his mouth and sucked, expression shifting into contentment. "You taste so good, baby. Imagine when you're coming for me."
"Richard John Grayson, if you don’t put— Fuck." The ensuing groan encompassed an ugly word. One of his fingers was still inside you while the other was pressed to your clitoris.
"How am I making you feel, huh?" he asked, despite knowing the answer as well as he knew your sweet spots. Adding another finger, Dick started looking for your G-spot, clitoris being well taken care of by his ring finger. Fuck, he was almost salivating by just thinking about eating you out, your taste, putting his tongue in the warm, wet place his fingers were, but for now, Grayson wanted to watch you enjoy yourself. It was in the way you bit your lip, whimpered for it and moved your hips to get more as if you didn't already have it all when it came to Dick Grayson. "Am I making you feel good?"
"I..." The weight on your chest worsened significantly, almost as if you had put a rock there. You mentally screamed at yourself. Fuck, out of all possible times, you had to be literally running out of breath while your pussy— Come on! The only good thing was that you knew your own body language well enough to quickly understand what was going on. "Dick, I can't breathe."
Dick, on the other hand, was too involved in taking you apart to reach the same conclusion as you.
"I’m making you breathless now?" Indigo eyes meet yours, full of lust. For a millisecond, you wondered if you could handle the random crisis, or if you could be confused about two different things with similar symptoms. That is until the shortness of breath had gotten worse. Fuck.
Well, the opposite of fuck now.
"No, Di— FUCK!" Feeling like the air wasn’t getting into your lungs and the fact that your boyfriend had just found a certain spot inside you while simultaneously rubbing your clitoris didn’t help you remember how to breathe. "I’m literally... My puffer!"
"Wh-- Oh my God, your inhaler!" Mentioning your little miraculous friend that wasn’t between his legs finally brought Detective Grayson's dormant instincts to the surface. He almost jumped away from you, hastily looking for the inhaler. "I'm sorry— I thought... Wait." The scene would be comical if you weren’t coughing in despair, gasping for air and yet simultaneously turned on. He found the puffer on the floor, beside the desk, and handed it to you. Relieved and mildly frustrated, you forced oxygen back into your body for a few moments. You forced yourself to calm down until the inhaler could be discarded next to Dick's book where it originally was.
You faced each other. What could be said? Sorry for forgetting how to breathe while you fingered me? Sorry for confusing your moans of "I can’t breathe’’ for "You’re making me breathless"? Can we agree never to use this expression again? So, I almost died, but am I still up for it? Is my cock still hard after your near-death experience?
For the second time in the evening, words were passed over to make room for another way of communication. The two of you burst out laughing, loud and scandalous. What the fuck just happened? A few good minutes later and you looked at Dick with a smile, your hand full of sin located on his thigh.
"We still got plenty of time. You know, quarantine perks."
Noises of 'you are unbelievable' from him were drowned out by a few more giggles, which soon gave way to corny moans. Perhaps the last two options were the right things to say.
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gogyposting · 7 months ago
have u listened to wilbur's music? i'm curious what u think about it
i have actually
:readmore: 
i have mixed feelings about it because there are some things that he really nails and other things that could use some work. for instance, i don’t think wilbur is a particularly good singer. most of the time he sounds like he is talking instead of singing, and when he does sing i don’t /love/ his voice. i do, however, absolutely love when he’s singing softly in a high falsetto like on La Jolla. but when he gets louder it becomes clear that he needs more practice. his voice shakes and he can’t hold a note very well. sometimes it adds to the atmosphere though, like in I’m Sorry Boris his voice is kind of rough and grating and you can hear his fingers sliding over the strings -- i’m going to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume this was intentional because if so the low production value makes it more? authentic? raw? i guess?
his lyrics are also a mixed bag. when they’re strong, they’re REALLY strong, and when they’re weak, they’re very pretentious. i think it’s more impactful if you’re a fan of wilbur or you know about a lot about him. for example, here’s some lines from Saline Solution: “i think this time i’m dying / i’m not melodramatic / i’m just pragmatic beyond any / reasoning for thinking i’ve got / fuckin rabies or something” wilbur has said before that he used to have problems with very severe hypochondria, he had anxiety over thoughts of getting sick and constantly feeling like he might be dying. knowing this just makes that line feel so much more, i dunno, deep? lol? and he actually developed asthma from the pollution after living in london (if it’s not clear i am talking about Your City Gave Me Asthma, not his other music) like wow king.
i think he’s great at setting the mood, everything about his album is so wistful and melancholic, his anger and sadness comes across so well. it’s kind of cliché in the sense that he really fits the tortured artist stereotype but if you can look past that it’s much more enjoyable. i also appreciate how it seems (? maybe, i might be giving him too much credit here) he’s aware of how YCGMA is kind of male manipulator music: “i think i’ve made my choice / i’m a deceased playing victim” “secondly, i know i haven’t written much / you know how i can be / but tonight i’m fucking drunk / so it’s all gonna be about me”
YCGMA is something that, in my opinion, should be listened to as a whole, it’s much stronger that way, cause if you listen to the songs individually there’s nothing really special about them. they’re good but not all that memorable. don’t put individual songs on a playlist, hit shuffle on the whole album while your driving home or laying in your bed staring at the ceiling. or something. except for Losing Face actually, that song is so fucking good, seriously if you take away nothing from this just go and listen to Losing Face. it’s like everything good about wilbur’s music in one song and it’s such a fucking banger
i’ve listened to his other music too, and i don’t have much to say about it. it’s like parody music which i don’t really like in general. Your New Boyfriend is great though, catchy as hell
i just went back and gave the album another listen and i really do love it. i like every song on there except for maybe Jubilee Line, that one is kind of boring. but YCGMA really grew on me. maybe you won’t like it the first time, but if you give it a chance it’ll get better, i think.
omg i’m gonna stop talking now cause this is so long. TL;DR yes i have listened to wilbur’s music, i personally like it a lot but if i look at it more critically it’s a mixed bag with high highs and low lows. i would give it like a 7/10 if a 5 is dead average.
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peachyunjinnie · a year ago
any blogs you wanna send love to? they don't have to be writers— i'm trying to prove a point here!❤️️❤️️
this is 1.5k and is officially more than most of my fics- ENJOY I GUESS??
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@ammuqwer Alice, i love you and your lovely compliments you give me all the time to hype me up :’). you are so talented and such an amazing writer and friend. i could not tell you how fUNNY YOU ARE ecila sotl uoy evol i ;)💗
@bangchanismybias i don’t even know how to tell you how much you mean to me with all the support you give me with EVERY SINGLE POST I MAKE it’s so crazy the amount of happiness you bring me when i see your name pop up with every post on my phone! love you!!!💗
@channiesmixtape woody :( ugh where the actual heck should i start? you are for real the biggest and coolest writer that i know one here and with the amazing jungwoo content you give us is just-😞 you are one of the big writers that inspired me to write as well and that was one of the best decisions i could have made on here, to switch from reader to writer! i love you and your selcas! (forreal you is a goddess)💗
@chanonymous s n e h a  m y  p u p p y  m o m  i am your problematic cutie and i love it! we don’t interact as much as we could but the times we do i really have such an amazing time to talk to you and talk about stuff that are just often talked about! i seriously learned some physics for you and i cannot believe that i did but i would do it again for you💗
@cherryeol04 CHERRY! okay, you are so cute and so adorable idK WHY BUT YOU ARE!!! you deserve so much and nothing but the absolute best! your fics are really so well written and you are one of the most underrated artists on here. you really create art on here and that’s nothing but the truth. i love you and i wish to reach your level of writing one day!💗
@doubleknot42 sky!! wow! we haven’t talked in a hot minute but your cute little outfit shows would make my day brighter and better! just to see that is so adorable and how you would thrist over Conan is so relatable! i love you so so much and i wish you nothing but the very very best!!!💗
@gabiog1me gabiiii! i know we just started talking but you are so nice and kind already! it’s actually pretty cool to see and have some black friends on here and kind of have the ability to rant over some stuff that someone with a darker skin color would understand better! and your music taste is A+!!! you are amazing and your a-z is on the way;)💗
@jisungsjheekies lin! you are really with woodles and nicole the biggest blogs that are supporting me and i could not tell you how that literally boosted my energy and my ideas to post! your appreciation posts were just something i would see every single day and would really love! you are such a great writer and your selca is WOW just WOW- love ya!!💗
@kinkywoojins SAMMY SAM! okay okay, the moment i realized that i know you hoe i was 😦 like just 😦. DESTINY IS SUCH AN AMAZING THING HAHAHA i love you mom and i love your posts! if you post again i can bet my left eyebrow i will be the first one to read the masterpiece. AND YOU ARE SO SO GORGEOUS LIKE WOW- THE DOUBLE KNOT PHOTOSHOOT WAS A WHOLE AESTHETIC- i love you so sooooo much!!💗
@lordseochangbin Mel, you are probably really one of the accounts that has the best humor. when you post some crackhead posts i just always have to lie down to calm down and not have an asthma attack and die. PLUS you are so talented! the tennis fic was fuCK so GOOD!! i am so honored to say that you my friend on here! love uuu uwu💗
@lixieslexie LEXIE! okay okay okay. you made me nearly cry when you said that you watched Ghibli movies and I COULD NOT PUT IN WORDS HOW PROUD I AM you are really so pure and such a sweetheart and you have found my softspot some way and now you are my C U T I E. i love u💗
@mrbangchannie meggie meg :) you are so precious and you are so crazy! you are an amazing writer, a beauty, crackhead humor queen and such an amazing friend! we have to talk more and send some crackhead pics cuz i need to send it to someone on here but no one would really get it tbh💀💗
@mikoto-ica-fics m i c a  okay so, YOUR DEMON EYE PIC WAS SO BEAUTIFUL AND I AM NOT KIDDING YOU ARE SO SO SO SO PRETTY!! I COULD NOT BELIEVE TO SEE THE EVERY SINGLE ONE ON HERE IS SO GORGEOUS AND THEN THERE’S ME LIKE WOW JUST WOW UNFAIRNESS AT AN ENTIRE DIFFERENT LEVEL- but you are such a pure person and your writing skill is another level of genius. love yuuuu💗
@mini-meanhoe summi🥺 i can’t believe that you are FINALLY my friend and now that we are and the pics you send me of bald stray kids i really do not regret it a SINGLE bit. BUT YOUR FLIRTY ASS NEEDS TO STOP like i kinda just have a constant bellyache from laughing because you of your flirty actions- you are the death of me and i am really not minding it at all hshshhah. also your writing is so good and you have to continue cuz nabi needs more to read! i LOVE you💗
@nightshade-minho miKA i love you and you are so hardworking and i really admire you on another level. i wish i could maintain such a huge blog like yours! you are really a mAgIcAL person cuz no way a normal human being is so cute and talented. when i saw that you’re following me i shit you not i had a 20 minute happydance in my room- imma end this before i expose my cringy ass too much, i luv u💗
@particularemu nicole! we haven’t interacted really but i really had to say this if you see this or something! you are awesome! you are great! you are incredible, you are wonderful! i love you and your sometimes random hyunjin reblogs and i could not get enough of them! i love you lots💗
@starryseung ivy, i saw that the admin changed into mia so imma just say that you both are great and i really love to read the various posts and just to scroll on the dashboard to see your posts! i love you two and you two are really so special!💗
@seungmins-sunshine ANNA I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU  I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU nothing else to say than that💗
@shari-skz shari! a fellow hyunjin stan and basically my sister...? anna’s family is complicated and i am so confused with who i am related to on here bUT what was about to say is that you brighten up everyone on here so much through the many hateful and irrelevant anons! i love your child ass and i hope we can talk more in the future!💗
@thevampywarlock aShY AsH I LOVE YOU. I SEE YOU AND I INSTANTLY UWU HARD IDK WHY BUT THE ENERGY YOU GIVE OFF IS SO CUTE I CAN’T EVEN STAY NORMAL AND I HOPE YOU CAN ALWAY COME TO ME WHEN YOU NEED TO AND WHEN YOU FEEL SAD OR SOMETHING CUZ I WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY AGAIN💗
@vocalyunhoamelie!!!! the way we first interacted was so weird and so cool at the same time! and the anonie you gave me on your blog really just hits different🥺 and it will stay our little secret hehee i love you and i hope i can get into more of your ateez work!!!💗
@yangomangos MANGOS! mh where to start, you are so adorable and so...idk just give me cute vibes? i was the most nervous little shit to text you because you kinda seemed like a celebrity to me JHGSJHGJASHHI with all of your work being out there and just thriving! you are such a baby and i will not argue over you being a baby! i love you and i really hope we can have better days in the future!💗
@yoyo-mans haya! i really don’t even know where to start with you! you are really such a huge huge friend for me and i couldn't tell you if i would be still here without you by my side. i want you to know that you are absolutely amazing and beautiful! i love you so much and i hope we can make many memories together!💗
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trying-write-fanfics · a year ago
Text
Shouji Mezo X Reader part 7 Remember
A day went by and no teaching aid.The class did see Y/n at lunch. She wasn’t as pulled together as she usually was, just a hoodie and leggings. In this light there was no doubt she was a teenager. 
“Shouji, call her over here.” Shoto told his friend.
“Why?” Shouji asked.
“She’s not going to come if I call her.” Shoto said.
“She does have a fondness towards you.” Tokoyami said. 
“Miss Velia!” Shouji called her over. 
She looked over and her eye did a weird thing. It seemed she was considering ignoring him, seeing Shoto was nearby. She sighed, and walked toward them with a tray of food. 
“What’s up, level headed table.” She came in.
They knew for a fact Aizawa hadn’t told her yet that they knew who she was. Shoto knew he had to talk to her, at least to know if her family tracked his mom down and told his father about her. Izuku switched tables to join them. He wanted to keep an eye on what she might do. 
“You didn’t come to class today.” Izuku said. 
“Did you miss me beefcake?” She used a regular voice instead of her teasing one. 
“No, I just thought you would come in, I mean you’re having lunch with us today…” he started to ramble. 
“I live here.”
Shoji fed his hand mouth. 
“That’s how you eat?” Her eyes went wide!
“Yeah…”
“Oh my god you never cease to amaze me! Now you should really try an eating contest.” She was getting more bubbly. 
The other three male students were surprised how calm Shoji was with the criminal rich girl. Especially how nice she was being with him. They didn’t understand the math of it yet, why Shouji. There wasn’t anything wrong with him, just why him?
“Are you coming after lunch?” Izuku asked.
“Do you want me to, beefcake?”
“Uh!”
“We do appreciate your help.” Shoto said. 
 He didn’t know how he was gonna grow the courage ask anything real. Hey did your mom play matchmaker and lead to a terrible marriage with a father who abuses his children? Whose to say she would even know about that. 
“You guys just want me to bully Butt-U-go, don’t you.” She sighed. 
“How did you learn to fight like that since you didn’t want to be a hero?” Izuku asked. 
“I thought you guys asked that yesterday. Nothing particular, just a good skill to have.” She said. “Get good!”
“Ha… that makes sense.” Izuku said. 
“Why are you guys nervous, did you guys take a test?” Y/n asked. 
They didn’t know how to answer that. She wasn’t as suspicious as she should be. She had a major secret for crying out loud! But then it got worse. She covered her mouth and started coughing before they could make up an answer. As she coughed she set the tray down and turned away, and started walking. 
“Do you need some water?” Shoto asked. 
She waved her hand like she was fine. For a split second she pulled her face back from her arm and they saw the blood, only a little spilled out of her mouth as she tried to get air. She used her quirk? For what? Shoji got up and went to the girl’s side. Past criminal or not, she was in danger even if it was herself. 
“I’ll help you to the nurses’ office.” He told her. 
 She nodded like she was agreeing to that. He put his hand on her back to guide her out of the cafeteria, so she could cough in peace. After a few steps she stopped in her tracks. She tried breathing in her arm before she removed it.
“I can...handle it from here.” She wheezed. 
His gut told him she wasn’t going to the nurses office. 
“You used your quirk.” He told her. 
 Her face was red from the blush and how the blood was a little bit smeared. She looked shocked that he knew it was her quirk. She started coughing again and she gave him one finger to say “give me a second.” She walked to the water fountain and tried washing the blood off her face. She had to have been in pain, she wasn’t getting proper oxygen. Did she have an inhaler?
“Do you have an inhaler?”
“N-o-o” she wheezed. 
Her fingers gripped the water fountain as her leg started to shake.
“Why did you use your quirk.”
 He saw that damn rash! She gave him two fingers for two seconds. She caught her breath and washed her face some more. 
“I fell...off the stair rail.” She told him. 
She didn’t seem to be lying even if that was a weird thing. She took a drink of that water to clear her throat a bit. She had to get the iron taste out a bit. He kinda felt bad for her. His quirk was his nature, but her quirk was gonna kill her if she let it. 
“Do you want me to carry you?” He offered. 
“Oh how scandalous!” She tried to laugh but ended up wheezing, she went to holding her ribs as she regretted trying to make a joke out of the offer. “Shit…”
Yeah, he didn’t care about the scandalous joke. She was gonna suffocate herself if he kept her the way she was. He used two of her arms to pick her up. 
“Oh my god do I (cough) weight nothing!” 
He didn’t know how to hold someone who was his supposed teaching aid. At the moment he was holding her up facing him. 
“I can put you on my back” he told her, that was how he carried Aizawa. 
“I’d prefer being set down.” She wheezed out. “I’ll get blood on you.”
 He pulled her over his head and put her on his back. 
“Well I’m training to be a hero so that’s gonna happen.” He told her. 
“I’m Shoji and I’m (cough) honorable. Fuck my lungs.”
“A teaching aid shouldn’t swear.” He teased her. 
“So you do...have a sense of humor.”  
“You shouldn’t talk in a time like this.” He told her. 
She mumbled something but then did something unexpected. She placed her cheek on his neck. Yeah the mask was still on, but he was still dealing with the fact that someone was instantly not afraid of him. One of her arms completely relaxed over his shoulder. 
“Did you faint?” He asked 
She didn’t answer. He used his arm eye to check. She looked a little knocked out. Her nose was squeaking with every breath. 
“You’re fussy.” She told him. “Don’t worry...I’m fine.”
She didn’t even bother opening her eyes all the way. Shoji made it to the nurse’s office where recovery girl was. She was shocked to see them both. 
“What happened?”
“She was coughing up blood and it was sorta like an asthma attack.” He told recovery girl as he set Y/n down on the bed.
 So she did end up fainting. 
“Just be careful around her.” Recovery girl told Shouji. 
He nodded and left.
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datleggy · a year ago
A hazing you say, to you say, do tell us more please.
oh839ruef it is 6am and im still drunk from the nite before so forgive this mess but u asked for it >:]
TK hasn’t been sleeping well at all; just a bunch of restless nights in a row, all of these thoughts keeping him awake.
Thoughts of his ex boyfriend—almost fiance’—thoughts of his father’s diagnosis—what would he do without him in his life?—and of course, those pesky little thoughts called addiction, which never really leave his subconscious, not even on the good days…
He ends up falling asleep in one of the trucks when he’s supposed to be cleaning, but God, he can’t help himself, he’s exhausted and the cushions are so warm and inviting.
Only minutes later Judd and Marjan come across TK, who’s sleeping soundly, (for the first time in over a week, though they wouldn’t know that) instead of doing his work, and the conniving begins!
They call Paul and the probie over.
“This is team building,” Judd tells Paul, when he asks, not for the first time, if they really think this is the best idea. “A little hazing never hurt nobody.”
Marjan, who’s grinning from ear to ear, agrees wholeheartedly. “Yeah, c’mon! Hurry up with the hose probie!” 
One moment TKs resting peacefully and the next he’s being forcibly dragged out of the rig, giant arms wrapped around him so tight it’s impossible for a half awake TK to wiggle his way out of them.
“Wakey wakey sleepy head!”
He barely has time to react when he’s suddenly being hosed, the water pressure enough to fully wake him. Coughing now and struggling against whoever is holding him still, TK only manages to break free when another set of strong hands grab hold of his shoulders and pull him away from the harsh spray of water hitting his face and chest.
“That’s enough, you guys tryna’ drown him?” Paul shakes his head, grimacing as he looks down at the kid in his arms. TK is soaked through and through.
TK coughs into the crook of his arm, gasping for air. When he finally looks up at the rest of the crew, Judd is expecting some kind of animosity, but what they get instead, is a mischievous grin, “You guys know payback’s a bitch, right?”
Matteo instantly drops the dripping hose like it’s on fire and tries to defend his actions. “They made me do it!”
Marjan huffs, putting away the phone she’d been using to record the whole thing up until now, glaring at the probie. “Scaredy cat.” then she turns around and points the finger at Judd, grinning. “Anyway, it was all his idea.”
Judd raises a brow at her, acting betrayed. “No loyalty, huh?”
Paul pats TKs wet shoulder and sighs, “I tried to stop them, if that’s any consolation.”
TK coughs again, rubbing at his chest, “I mean, a little warning woulda’ been nice.”
Paul raises his hands, “Hey man, you might be canoodling with a cop, but I’m no snitch.”
TK is less than thrilled by all the teasing ‘Oooh’s’ and ‘Aaah’s’ that follow Paul’s comment. “Yeah yeah,” TK’s cut off by another cough. And then another, and another. And after a few more coughs TK realizes he can’t stop, his chest tight, and fuck.
He remembers being six and suffering from asthma up until the age of ten, maybe.
But it’s been over a decade now since his last attack, this can’t be that, can it?
“Hey man, you alright?” Judd reaches for TK, a hand on his shoulder, brows knitted in concern.
TK continues his coughing fit, but manages to shake his head no. The air around him feels thin and his chest is starting to hurt.
Judd blinks, “Shit, you’re not pullin’ my leg, are ya’?” He looks to Matteo, who’s standing there looking about as petrified as he feels at the moment, “Something’s wrong, get Captain Blake, quick!” he orders.
Probie wastes no time, practically tripping over his own two feet in his haste.
Paul helps Judd get TK into a sitting position on the floor, guiding him with gentle but firm hands. “TK, look at me, just shake your head yes or no, do you have asthma?”
TK gasps for air between his bouts of coughing, he shakes his head no but realizes that’s not completely true, “When,” he pauses to cough, wincing and clutching at his chest, “When I was little.” he admits.
Marjan curses. “I’m gonna’ get Cap.” She’s not sure what that’s gonna’ do—she doubts Owen has a spare inhaler from when his kid had asthma over ten years ago, handy on him—but she’s seen the way the two interact, if nothing else, the older mans’ presence will help TK feel a bit less panicked.
Both Captains get there at almost the same time, one after the other, both bending at the knee to get face to face with the young firefighter.
Owen doesn’t have to ask what’s wrong, when he sees his son, because the scene is all too familiar, though it’s been years since the last time it happened. “It’s an asthma attack.” he tells Blake, “He hasn’t had one since he was ten.”
Blake nods, already digging into her kit for a rescue inhaler. “TK, open up, I need you to take two puffs, breathe in slowly for five seconds and try to hold your breath for ten, it’ll help the medicine get into your lungs, can you do that for me?”
TK nods anxiously, letting her press down on the inhaler. He tries to do as he’s told but ends up coughing up the puffs before they can be fully absorbed. “S-sorry.” he can’t catch his breath and the wheezing is only getting worse.
“It’s ok, you’re gonna’ be ok, let’s try it again.” Blake helps him a second time, with Captain Strand now behind TK, rubbing up and down his back encouragingly. “Ready? Slow breath TK, slow breath, c’mon.”
This time TK is able to hold his breath long enough that he can feel the albuterol taking effect on his lungs. Dizzy with relief and beyond exhausted by the exertion, TK nearly falls backwards.
Thankfully Owen is there to catch him, wrapping his arms around the kid carefully and breathing out his own sigh of relief. “Jesus TK.” That’s another gray hair for the books.
TK pats the arm around him, “I’m good.” he assures his dad, though it comes out breathy and short. But he is fine now, just tired, and frankly, embarrassed about having an asthma attack of all things, in front of the entire crew. He tries to get up on his own two feet but the moment he’s standing upright another dizzy spell hits him and if not for Judd who steps in to support him, he’d have ended up right back down on the floor again. “Thanks.”
Judd looks down at him, guilt etched onto his features. “Don’t thank me, Christ kid, I’m the reason all this happened. Shit.”
“What did happen?” Owen asks, looking like a disappointed dad as he stares at his team, all of whom are looking down in shame.
TK rolls his eyes, though it’s hard to act like it was no big deal when he’s still holding onto Judd like a day old calf who just can’t seem to get his legs under him yet. “Dad, it was nothing, it’s not their fault, I—” he doesn’t want to admit the truth. That it’s all the nights of little to no sleep for over a week now that exasperated his asthma, and that the hazing thing only helped push it that little bit over the edge.
“It was my fault.” Judd cuts in, seeing the look of conflict on TK’s face. “I thought a little hazing wouldn’t hurt, but it was stupid as hell and childish and it nearly got TK killed.” he turns to the younger man in his arms. “I’m so sorry man, that was reckless—”
Marjan interrupts, squeezing TK’s shoulder from the side. “It wasn’t just Judd, I ran with it too, I’m sorry TK.”
Paul and Matteo take responsibility too, gathering around TK to apologize.
Though the Captain is grateful that the crew are seemingly handling this among themselves, he still feels the need to say something. “Hazing is for college fraternities and has no place in the work place, and I hope this is the first and last time we need to have this conversation, do I make myself clear?”
This is followed by a chorus of guilty little “Yes Captain”’s.
Hours later, when everything has calmed down and most everyone is in their own bunk, getting ready for bed, TK finds himself in the kitchen, making himself a pot of coffee.
Paul joins him as he’s about to take his first sip. “Nuh uh.” Paul snatches the cup away and pours it down the drain. “That is not what you need.”
TK would be offended if he had the energy, but as it is, he’s just too tired. All that comes out is a faint, “Hey, that was mine.” and it comes out whiny.
“I’m making you some tea.”
TK huffs. “I wanted coffee.”
Paul clears his throat, already boiling the water. “You know…if you ever need to talk, we’re all here for you.”
TK looks away, biting his bottom lip. “I’m fine.”
“If you say so. I just think you need reminding that it’s ok not to be fine sometimes, and it’s even more ok to talk to someone about it, even if all the other person can offer is an ear to listen.” he goes about preparing the tea, throwing in a spoonful of honey for good measure.
TK takes the warm mug, grumbling about his coffee all the while. After a few sips he looks up at Paul, who’s sitting on the stool with his own cup of tea. “I um, it’s not a big thing, I just haven’t really been sleeping. It’s just…” he knows his dad hasn’t told too many people about his cancer yet, and he doesn’t want to go spilling the beans. “It’s a lot on my mind lately, that’s all. And then last week my ex sent me this stupid text telling me I still had some clothes at his place, if I wanted to go pick them up—what the hell am I supposed to say to that? It’s been over three months, why now?”
Paul shakes his head, sipping his tea. “That asshole.”
TK lets out a surprised laugh at the amount of righteous anger in Paul’s voice on his behalf. “Right?!”
They spend a good hour just talking—mostly shit about his ex, and then shit about some of Paul’s exes, and then about life in general—and before he knows it, TK’s downed his entire cup of tea and his head is laying on his arms on the countertop, and his eyelids are so heavy he can barely keep them open.
He hears voices above him, but they’re quiet voices, “Hey big guy, wanna’ help me get him to bed?”
“Yeah, I got sleepin’ beauty.” he can’t mistake that Texan drawl for anyone else but Judd, and soon he feels himself being lifted into a pair of strong arms, and he knows he should be embarrassed to be carried off like this, but he’s too tired to really care and Judd’s surprisingly gentle.
He’s laid to bed and for the first time in a long time, he sleeps soundly throughout the night.
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intoafandom · 2 years ago
Text
SPOILERS!!!!! FOR IT CHAPTER 2!!!!!!
The movie was soooo freaking good i gotta talk about it
I loooooooved how many scenes came from the book
THE POLAROIDS WERE SO CUTTEEEE
THE PADDLEBALL SCENE😂😂
The fortune cookie scene was amazing
I WAS SO HAPPY they put the scene with Richie and the paul bunyon statue.
All of the monsters/forms were freaking creepy omg. Like way more than the last movie
Rip Stan
Eddie’s scene with his mom gave me so many reactions freaking damn. Cuz every time he said mommy i was swooning from how adorable he was. And he was so scared I was like aijdjajs get away from my babay. But then he was gunna leave her there and i was shook. And then it stuck it’s tongue in her mouth and i was like 🤢
It was waaaaay more gory and unsettling than the first one
The actors who played adult richie and eddie were spot on
Richie and eddie also made me laugh the entire time
“FUCK YOU” “oh fuck you” “fuck you thats not even funny”
The part with stans head turning into a bug🤢
The main scene with them in the gave with the spikes is exactly how I pictured it in the book. Spot on perfection
I thought it was sooo cool how cuz bev got caught in the last movie, she was able to have those visions
Rip eddie my fav
Literally cried when he died
Cried again with richie crying
Cried again when richie cried again
Cried AGAIN when richie cried AGAIN
like freaking WHY😭😭😭
This movie was soooo much darker than the first one
I loooooved actually getting to see bill scarsgards face in that one scene
BEV ON FIRE FOR BENS VISION WAS CREEPY AS HELL
so was the old lady thing
I was SO happy that bills wife was barely in it. I was so annoyed that she was there during the fight in the book so im glad it was just the losers
The only scene i was sad wasn’t in the movie is when bens in the library and he sees all the balloons pop blood
The flashbacks were PERFECT and flawless
Like older eddies face fading into young eddies
Or the clubhouse switching to them coming in as their younger selves
Also sooo happy they included the clubhouse
RICHIE AND EDDIE IN THE CLUBHOUSE IN THE HAMMOCK TOGETHER WAS SO FREAKING CUTE I LOVED IT
and when eddie slapped richies face with his foot I diiiiiiieeed😂😂😂
That little kid that bill tried to save was so cute omg
GEORGIE!!!!! my little baby
BILL REALLY WASNT SICK AND JUST DIDNT WANNA PLAY WITH HIM WHAT!!!!! literally shoooooooook
Loved seeing stephen and andy getting those tiny roles
Stans speach 👏🏻👏🏻
Fuck henry
There were only a few things I didn’t like
This is dumb but I really wanted them to break eddies arm again instead of just stabbing him in the face. It really didn’t make that much sense. Breaking his arm like in the book would’ve been so much better
I really didn’t like that they got rid of henry so fast. Like he breaks out of a mental institution, stabs eddie in the face just to get axed by richie. Kinda made his character just seem too random
Wish we got to see the dead versions of his other gang members too
So richie really loved eddie huh 🥺🥺
His crying was literally so sad.
Im 100% with richie on this one. In the book i was SO PISSED they left him down there and clearly richie was too in the movie
When he was screaming eddies still down there 😓😓😓😓
Ughhh still hate it
BUT IM SO FUCKING HAPPY THEY DIDNT MAKE IT LIKE THEY FORGOT WHO EDDIE WAS LIKE IN THE BOOK. LIKE HOW THE FUCK DO U FORGET EDDIE KASPRAK AND THAT HE HAS ASTHMA. DONT PLAY WITH ME. so thank you movie for not forgetting him or replacing him with someone who “looks and acts a lot like eddie kasprak” cough cough old it chapter 2
Richie and eddie with the puppy tho🥺
Until it when batshit crazy
Kinda reeeeaally mad eddie didn’t get his “dont call me that” line in response to richies “eddie spaghetti” line
REALLY MAD EDDIE DIED BY HIMSELF
FUCK PENNYWISE but not bill skarsgard tho
Jack Dylan Grazer ALWAYS slays the screen💪🏻
Old bill meeting young bill in thaaaaat scene was so good
Stans smile at the beginning to when bev told him about her “dream” was so cute and it made me so sad knowing he was about to die
Eddie saved richie though. A warriors death 👏🏻🙌🏻🙏🏻
IT was sooooooooo good. My babies 🥰
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thechampagnelovers · 7 months ago
I‘m back for you! 🕺🏽 (Sorry the song has been stuck in my head all day)
I already started following some of your mutuals hahaha. I always stalk who you interact with and stuff and if I like what I see I follow. 😌Okay you even thinking about making me something makes me go 🥺🥺🥺. Thank youuu you don‘t have to do that but I sure as hell appreciate it! 🥰
I am so thankful for that extensive Taylor review oh my. Now when I think about it I remember being friends with a die hard Taylor fan when I was like 16 and that was around the time 19889 came out and I am sure I did listen to some of those at that point. So maybe I will be able to be convinced. 😳😳😳 We will see how this goes, I will listen to everything you told me and I will, as always, report back to you! I do have to say I am a bit jealous you have friends that are into fandoms. I don‘t have that at all. Sometimes I just want to cry about the brilliance that is One Direction music to people irl but all I get is weird stares and people who „understand“. It‘s a hard knock life. 😂
I am just a loud personality that makes a fool of myself and the people who appreciate my wits normally stick around to become my friend. That‘s how it‘s always been I think. 😅 Not that I would call it a strategy to make friends. I just don‘t know how to act in public asjskdhk. Maybe I will send you a poem or something I wrote when I feel confident. We‘ll see. 👀
Listen, I love Niall too. You do good by trusting him.
Oh my GOD why did you ex text you to come over? Are you still friends? Or trying to be? Or was like just downright booty call things? Honestly that doesn’t even sound that bad. I think I would have had a heart attack when an ex of mine would ever even try to contact me again. But I do understand why you stopped, it was my main reason too and that hasn‘t changed. 😅 I had the worst time getting off my pill. Same with my friend, she got terrible acne she is still struggling with. It‘s so scary what these things can do to you?
Well at least you know it can be good to cry, that is a start and more than a lot of people can admit!
I think I will google the book to know what your talking about and I hope I won‘t regret it. At least it had a „happy“ ending.
Happy to hear you are better! Hope it stays that way! 😌 My week has started bad and isn‘t going good but just sending these asks makes it a little better so thank you! Sometimes I‘m chilling on here though and I am reblogging and then I am reblogging stuff from you and then I am like shit I still need to answer hahaah. So yeah that‘s where we are nowww. x
what would you like? a collage type edit? anything in particular? please i would love to make you something! it’s the least i can do, and it’s fun too
skjdjk tbh i got very lucky i guess, idk :/ but dont worry about that, with time you’ll find people who share things with you, i just got lucky i’ve always been around people like that. I’m happy to hear you’ll give taylor a chance, she’s totally amazing and the lyrics please her lyrics are just perfect
OMG i would love to read one of your poems, it would make my whole day <3 i bet they’re wonderful
idk how it happened but that week i remember being so horny more than the usual and then one day he just messaged me and was like hey we should fuck and i said YES and then i had a breakdown because i cant do the sex without feelings bc im a hopeless romantic so i couldnt do it :/ like, rn my stability can’t handle casual sex, specially with him. so, thats what happened, i sort of manifested it and then i chickened out skdjks ugh pills are the worst tbh, we shouldn’t bother at this point but i kinda need them :( i only hope they can make me feel better 
ohh you’re so sweet, thank u <3 yeah you’re right, idk i just have to let myself cry once in a while but i hate it, i feel so stupid kjdsks
im so sorry to hear it started bad :/ it do be like that sometimes, how are you feeling? hows the asthma? im happy at least i can make u happy dsjkssd and OMG YOU REBLOG FROM ME???? now i’ll go through every blog in my notes djfksdjfl 
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