#you hurt me good
asecretvoice · 9 months ago
It doesn’t matter that you broke my heart multiple times, I still saw all that good in you. I still cared for you despite of it, loved you when you didn’t love me back. I still believed, but I deserve someone who will see all I have and not walk away.
-one day you will miss me like I missed you
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natjennie · 3 months ago
what really gets me about "you brought history's greatest pirate to ruin" is that stede didnt. he didnt do anything to blackbeard. he was only ever in the company of ed. and he gave ed so many outs. never once pushed anything on him he didnt want to do. from the very first "do you fancy a fine fabric?" "can you keep a secret?" to the agreement to teach each other after the lighthouse plan to "co-captain?" "co-captain?" to "you'd save me a seat, wouldnt you?" to "you dont have to do this" to "and what makes ed happy?" stede always puts the option in ed's hands. he never, not once, presumes what ed wants. he is kind, and open, and courteous. and yet he continues to blame himself, to feel such great shame for wanting, even when the other party wants it too.
during the whole beach scene, ed is making the decisions. he's doing what he wants to do, what makes him happy. he asks if stede wants to come with him, if he agrees to the plan. there is no forcefulness in anything that they do with each other ever. the idea that stede has done anything to ed is ridiculous; if ed, if blackbeard was against anything stede did he would fucking know about it.
but the fact that badminton got so under stede's skin that he couldn't see that. he couldnt possibly understand that ed would choose to be with him, choose to go along with what he suggested, because god knows no one else in his life has ever trusted stede's judgement or been kind or gone along with him willingly. so of course he assumes he must have manipulated ed in some way. he must have been ruining him, seeping into the cracks and becoming an awful puppet master, ed could never want to be with him, of course it's his fault. you know!!!!
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inkskinned · a month ago
you didn't say sorry, not really. you said sorry only when i pushed about it, you said it like an afterthought, like - oh fine, if this is what you want. the apology was already tearing itself apart in the air. you said sorry, but you caused this. you said sorry you feel that way, i guess. you said: what else do you want me to say? you've already made up your mind to be angry about this.
you've moved on since then. i hope you found a therapist. i am stuck with all of the hurt you caused but - you've been working on yourself, on your multiple projects, on that beautiful life you live. happy - you look happier, lighter, free of all of it. you take artsy videos of yourself dancing; caption it - a friend recently abandoned me.
nobody else knows how hard you pushed. nobody else knows what you did. i am sure you tell everyone a version of the truth that makes out the best of you; turns me into a cold unfeeling bitch who just "doesn't understand" you. i am sure you leave out all the ways i gave you myself, over and over, for years. how many times before this you hurt me, crossed my boundaries, laid me bare - what you say to them about when i finally drew the line is - she is just being unfair.
sometimes i feel insane about it. i have to text my best friend, make sure that what-i-think-happened actually-happened. to double-check that i wasn't being a bad person. maybe i'm misremembering it. she often has to guide me back to the same two facts: beyond what any one person could reasonably expect, i gave you everything, and you still wanted more of it.
it makes me angry, when it doesn't make me sick. i force myself to journal about it. how fucked up it makes me, knowing your narrative will be the one that sticks - knowing you are out there, right now, making sure everyone listens. telling them how you are being targeted. how you, hurting me on purpose, making me feel small, ignoring my needs - how that was really my fault, in the end.
yesterday you made a post on instagram talking about how you used to feel guilty about something that had gone wrong in a relationship, but that you've freed yourself from those toxic idealisms. you said: i am not giving her the power to make me feel bad about my mistakes. i am just a human person - it's up to her if she wants to be the bigger person and actually forgive.
and i just sat there and thought: you haven't even actually apologized for it.
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i need some of you to realize that call out culture, by design, rewards people who make the most outrageous & aggressive accusations, without regards to truth or context. it encourages people to misconstrue, to erase context, to outright lie. it feeds the instinct to attack, with or without cause. 
and that naturally enables certain types of people (terfs, exclusionists, bigots) who already have a vitriolic bandwagon behind them, to target & harass minority bloggers whose inclusive platforms they do not like to see becoming popular.
this has happened time and again, it has driven good people off this site, it is traumatic and unhealthy to everyone involved. purity culture creates an atmosphere of fear & paranoia, i am begging you to reexamine this attitude of mob violence in online spaces
#not a shitpost#serious post#harassment tw#seriously ya'll......this happens time and again and i'm getting fucking sick of it#do you remember i-am-a-fish? do you remember when you let ace & trans exclusionists target & harass i-am-a-fish off this site?#i see the same tactics being used time and again on different ace & trans & nb & gnc bloggers#and it WORKS! it works every time! people on this site fall for it every time and i am SICK of it#would you just. look at people's blogs and judge them on their recent and overall actions.#if people have been personally hurt by them then yes listen to victims#but don't take screenshots of posts from 2 years ago as the sacred truth#i see bloggers apologizing again and again for the same things and then realize 'oh shit they don't *want* an apology'#'these people just want more shit to throw at me. an apology is never going to be enough'#and also....let people grow? i'm proud of how quickly the standards of what is appropriate and respectful are changing & progressing#we are all constantly learning new things about what is and is not appropriate to say. and that's good!!#but the result is that what we considered appropriate a year or 2 ago we now know probably shouldn't be#so like. look at people's recent posts if you want to know their recent attitudes.#don't go attacking people for stuff they said years ago unless you have reason to believe they still believe & are perpetuating it#especially when so many people on this site are goddam teenagers holy shit#i honestly wonder if that is the reason so many people in online spaces are unwilling to admit they were wrong or change their opinions#bc we've erased the concept that you're allowed to be wrong and grow and update your opinion#so if you admit you are wrong NOW you're opening yourself up to be attacked years down the line#i've had to learn as a popular blog when to clapback and when to just...let it slide#often it's better to tell people off in private or block them. but callout culture is encouraging us to just.#automatically hit back fullthrottle in a way that puts our target at risk for public harassment#so i see a lot of crappy but lowkey comments getting people dunked into shitstorms and it's just....#a lot of time and energy spent harassing people who...aren't really the people you should be concerned about?#and who could probably learn & grow if given the right incentive?#idk i'm seeing a lot of stick and very little carrot.#and a lot of black-and-white thinking that leads to more violence than i'm comfortable having in an online community
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ngrogu · 5 months ago
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In 2021 I posted a 20 page comic about trauma and a 9 page comic about din jerking off all over luke.  in the same month. 
no sorry it was within 29 days
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last-in-line-for-hell · 9 days ago
Gonna say it here too but Wei Wuxian has nothing to be sorry for regarding Nightless City.
He tried to speak but they refused to listen.
He was attacked first, defended himself, and was condemned for it.
They wanted to kill not only him, but all the innocent people he was protecting as well.
People blaming him for the ensuing slaughter when his mind broke upon Jiang Yanli’s sacrifice (which was ALSO not his fault like c’mon???) make no sense to me.
They pushed him to it.
They spit on the sacrifices of Wen Qing and Wen Ning.
They refused to hear him out and decided he was done for before Jin Zixuan even died, let’s be real.
(And no, 3000 cultivators did not die at Nightless City. Wei Wuxian straight up questions the absurdity of such a high number himself.)
I don’t know, I’ll probably delete this, but it boggles my mind when people hold this against Wei Wuxian when he was the one attacked.
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ghosted-jazz · 8 months ago
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What if the Forest Fairies Castle Shadow Alliance have fairy wing capes
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justpastryvideos · 2 months ago
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yoeyrt · 5 months ago
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you loved too much for your own good o7
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asecretvoice · 11 months ago
Thank you for teaching me how I want to be loved back, I just wish you weren’t another life lesson I had to learn along the way.
-for a while I thought it was real
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tunapesto · 3 months ago
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i know it was real, i could feel it
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argiopi · 6 months ago
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I fed some lore tablets / quotes / etc to an AI.
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sergle · a month ago
judging by some of the tags and asks on those selfies, it seems like people are absolutely TERRIFIED to mention The Tits in a way that suggests they’re good, since I mentioned planning for a reduction lol. I think ppl are more used to the idea of reductions/top surgery for Dysphoria Reasons now than doing it for Physical Pain reasons. it’s okay bro. if I hated my boobs I wouldn’t have them Out all the time
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welcometogrouchland · 8 months ago
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[image ID: two page digital comic of an an alternate version of the unknowing from the Magnus archives. First page is a full page drawing featuring Sasha, Tim, Jon, Basira and Daisy from the Magnus archives. The colours are bright and stylized. Sasha stands under a spotlight, posed like a mannequin with string sewn into her clothes and wrapped around her fingers. Her outfit has clownlike touches- a diamond pattern on her shirt a jester's collar. She has worm scars and a single tear rolls down her cheek. The remaining four characters look at her, silhouetted. Jon says "Tim..."
Page two shows a panel of Jon and Tim looking at each other. The background is red now, and the colours are more realistic. Jon says "Tim, does she...does she seem familiar?". Tim replies "I...I don't know. Maybe? I don't like this Jon". The next panel is daisy and Basira looking at us. Basira says "guys? Something you want to tell us?". Next panel shows breekon and hope entering, looking behind a terrified Jon. In sync, they trade lines of the following dialogue: breekon: "such a shame really". Hope: "tragic". Breekon: "after everything the poor lass has been through. Lost her life in the outside world". Hope: "lost her place in people's memories". Breekon: "bout to loose her skin in the dance". Final panel continues the dialogue while showing us tim and Jon, who have horrified expressions on their faces. Hope finally says "and you cant even recognize your dear old Sasha". End ID]
(Click for quality) OKAY one last thing for @red-string-retrospective-week that I did for the prompt "memory", based on the fact that I thought Sasha was gonna come back for an embarrassingly long amount of time (like. Up until s4). This is set at the unknowing!
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guqin-and-flute · 7 months ago
Lan Xichen Episode 42 ✨Face Journeys✨
karetahana said: Listen. i am here literally asking for the analysis if you feel like doing 🤩
OH, WELL IF YOU INSIST *turns with a lovingly embossed binder full of Xichen pictures* This is sincerely self indulgent and long as absolute fuck, just a warning. Bold is a direct quote from the show (Youtube/Netflix)
OKAY. Episode 42. We start at 30:20, Lan Wangji is sitting next to Wei Wuxian who is convalescing on Lan Wangji’s bed back at the Cloud Recesses after having been stabbed (bummer) during a disaster of a recon mission that landed not only him and Wangji in hot water with everyone (double bummer), but Xichen as well for demanding entry to Jin Guangyao’s secret room (triple bummer). Wuxian is worried about being back in the Cloud Recesses-- “What if your brother finds out?” Enter Xichen, rocking up to the conversation with a fucking joke; “I found out already.” Letting him sweat a little, but as he sounds pretty calm, it’s mostly a ‘it’s hilarious that you think that I wouldn’t know about this, dude.’ (Bro, how are you so chill? How are you so good?)
They get up and bow as he strolls in. Wuxian apologizes for existing here, in his mountain and stuff. Xichen shakes his head with amused fondness; 
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and hits them both with this smile that reaches his eyes and says ‘Nah, son, that was me. You can live here while they search for you ‘cause I’m nice and I like you.’
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Genuine, comforting, and warm. ‘Glad to have you here, Wuxian.’
WWX and LWJ exchange a look--probably WWX asking for confirmation, LWJ giving it. Then, with zero further ado, WWX jumps right in with “Where’s Chifeng-zun’s body?”
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Surprise. Looks like they’re jumping right into it (and I don’t know if Xichen notes this, but I certainly do--with no ‘thank you’ or ‘sorry about that, kinda awkward for everyone’ or pre-emptive offered explanation as to what the fuck went down yesterday at JinLinTai.)
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That pain has resurfaced recently and is not easily hidden away. This topic is upsetting.
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He turns his back, walks away as he tells them that the body is safe and with Huaisang. He’s not sure he can control what’s going on on his face when it comes to what happened to Da-ge. His eyes move around a lot as he says this--he’s still thinking. 
WWX: What was Jin Guangyao’s reaction? 
LWJ: [slightly bitter] Flawless
At this, Xichen turns back, face under control. (Liebing is in between them, now. Subconsciously defensive?)
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He looks between both of them as he speaks and these smiles don’t quite reach his eyes like the first ones. His chin dips down in firmness, his eyebrows are raised in what I personally would interpret as ‘leading expectance.’ The point of this visit is incoming.
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LWJ knows that tone, even if WWX doesn’t. 
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Looking at WWX, he’s smiling, but still doesn’t quite meet his eyes. There’s something more than just fondness there. “Now that Wei-gongzi is awake...” [pause] 
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Looks to Wangji. Abruptly, there is more to his expression--less masking, more intent in his eyes. This is serious and he is being earnest.  ‘Don’t you think you owe me something of an explanation for how nothing you both said was proven after I publicly threw my lot in with you without question and demanded Jin Guangyao open his secret room? And then his wife died inexplicably? And then you fought your way out? And I told you to bring WWX back on good faith because we both care about him and I know what he means to you?’ (Have I mentioned yet how chill Xichen is? And how great?)
LWJ: [slightest of head bows, no expression change] Brother.
Now, I don’t quite know what this is supposed to mean, but Xichen sure does and his reaction makes me think it’s some sort of younger brother sass that he’s used to.
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Fond exasperation and some warmth back in his expression. A sigh and an affectionately despairing ‘what am I going to do with you?’ But he’s still waiting. 
LWJ: Brother. Jin Guangyao does indeed have Chifeng-zun’s head.
This is not an explanation or proof. It’s a doubling down of what they have said before with no further information. 
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Immediate disbelief--’This again.’ He covers it quickly, mask back up, but there is a tightly held patience in his smile that does not bode well for LWJ or WWX.  The pleasantry starts to leave even if the smile remains.
LWJ: He saw it with his own eyes
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And oh holy shit. That fake, tight smile drops away, and there is something almost cold in his eyes for a moment, here. We have hit the heart of it. His eyes flick over to WWX and a low, troubling cello note plays in the background. Deep displeasure at this answer. (This is one of those times when I remember that Xichen is, in fact, quite a dangerous monster hunter.)
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WWX knows how this sounds and does not meet his gaze. He, at least, shows he’s aware of what Xichen is getting at.
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Xichen stares a moment more, looks back at Wangji and very visibly swallows back anger as his jaw flexes. 
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When he blinks, the smile is back. He holds a lot of tension in the corners of his mouth as he forces it. There is anger in them there hills. He is frustrated. Wangji is deliberately not seeing things from his perspective, as he has repeatedly tried to do for him and Wuxian. Xichen is trying very hard to be reasonable and calm about this.
LXC: You believe in Wei-gongzi? LWJ: I do. LXC: [in the manner of a teacher leading you to an answer] What about Jin Guangyao? LWJ: Not credible. 
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[Slightly jarring cut to Xichen from farther away, (and blurry as hell?) clearly a different take, but whatever]  He sighs and comes closer and--YAY--fond exasperation is back. ‘You are being deliberately obtuse, bro.’ 
LXC: Then how do you judge who is credible or not? [Pause] LWJ: [silence] LXC: You trust Wei-gongzi and I trust Jin Guangyao. [Expectant pause]
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He’s being patient again. ‘You know, like 16 years ago? When no one trusted Wei Wuxian or looked for all the facts? And just relied on hearsay? Do you see what I’m getting at? Is this familiar at all, Wangji? There are parallels that you should be able to empathize with.’ 
Silence from Wangji as he stares into the middle distance around the area of Xichen’s shoulders. 
Xichen elaborates further into this silence, saying something along the lines of; ‘neither of us saw the head, we’re going on trust--both of us. You do not have solid evidence beyond hearsay whereas I am working off of years of personal experience as evidence from my perspective. You do understand that I’m going to need more than this, right? I have not seen Wei Wuxian in 16 years and the last time I did he was trying to murder us all.’ (Well. Okay, maybe not in so many words, but that’s the gist.) During the majority of this speech, the camera slowly pans past Xichen speaking, zooming in on Wangji’s face. 
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He is deliberately closed off. He is not responding to Xichen verbally and his nonverbal signals are basically, ‘I disagree. I disagree. I disagree.’ Then, we get this little batch of juicy facial expressions along with a speech.
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So much is here. Frustration, fear, pleading, asking to be understood. He is intense and earnest. ‘You’re not trying to understand my position. Please.’ He ends with this face.
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Waiting. He is losing his composure. This is a Lan fight, now; he is no longer really considering the fact that there is anyone else seeing him or hearing him other than Wangji. There is a beat of silence. Wuxian looks at Wangji. The camera cuts to Wangji and nothing has changed in his face at all during this pronouncement and he is still not looking at him. Xichen tries again.
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There is less mobility in his eyebrows, and the corners of his mouth are tight again. He is disbelieving. ‘So your reason is allowed to be because Wei Ying said so but mine isn’t allowed to be I’ve watched this happen before to you and I refuse to be party to another mob before I have all the facts? You’re not even going to try to understand when I’ve done all I can to try to understand you?’ He ends with this face, for a few moments, clearly hurt.
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Wangji remains silent, but he looks down and away with his eyes. Wuxian breaks in, says, “Lan-zongzhu,” almost reprimanding, obviously tense. And it’s clear that Xichen had forgotten that he was there because here’s the face journey that started this whole post.
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He looks to Wuxian instinctively without masking, reminded of his presence. It takes him a second but he blinks and and realizes what he’s done.
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Goes inside. Has whatever dialogue with himself that he has whenever he dares to have an undiplomatic and entirely “selfish” emotion. Takes in a breath. Makes himself presentable with a smile. And reassures Wuxian that he still plans on being impartial and will not reveal where Wei Wuxian is. Wuxian bows and thanks him for this.
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Xichen almost says something--or maybe he’s thinking--but all he does is sigh. He looks vaguely regretful and is clearly reeling himself back in. He does not reply and he does not look at Wangji. Wangji is staring past him. (The boys are fightiiiiing.)
In this opening, Wei Wuxian steps closer and insists, very seriously, that Mingjue’s head really was in Jin Guangyao’s posession. And Xichen does this.
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He steels his jaw, takes a breath, and smiles. ‘Sure kid. What I say clearly doesn’t matter. Because we’re here again.’ Now, he talks with Wei Wuxian and he is measured and patient and perfectly pleasant. Sometimes, his face grows serious when he listens. 
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But when he speaks--either right before or during--he smiles this smile. 
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He ends all of his sentences with this smile.
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Even when Wuxian suggests that it might have been the music being played that drove Mingjue to qi deviation, he blinks, sighs, and says;
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It is all nearly the exact same expression. It is perfectly acceptable, completely polite. But it is not familiar or warm and it does not reach his eyes. It is defensive, covering up whatever other emotional reaction he might have to Wei Wuxian’s words. Any vulnerability is gone. He is not offering it to Wei Wuxian. He is no longer asking to be understood. He simply repeats, in different ways, ‘You do not have hard facts. You have not brought me proof. I’m sorry, but you have not convinced me.’
Xichen does not look at Wangji through this entire conversation and Wangji says nothing. Wuxian offers to show Xichen proof--the thing he’s been asking for this whole time--and his reaction is to nod.
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And smile the same exact smile.
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the-final-sif · 2 months ago
Having had a bit of time to think about things after that stream, and see some of people’s reactions to it, I think there’s a lot that’s already been said, but I would like to make a few points.
Despite what some people are claiming, and despite people throwing a hissy fit, limited to no evidence I can find suggests that anyone has actually been doxxed as a result of Dream rting/replying to them, let alone that this is a common issue. There’s lots of people saying “oh no if Dream replies to someone the ~~evil~~ Dream stans will come get them”, and him rting does sometimes result in the person getting clowned on, but not doxxing and frankly in several of the tweets I looked at, the person barely even got a response.
I keep seeing people in the tags talking about how doxxing is super scary and Dream shouldn’t talk about it lightly, with some people claiming that he doesn’t have a right to talk about it, or that he doesn’t have a right to tell people not to live in fear of it.
I would like to take a moment to remind people, that Dream has more right to talk about being doxxed than most people on the fucking planet.
In case people have forgotten, groups have been actively trying to doxx Dream basically since he got popular.
Dream literally got fucking swatted by doxxers during MCC11 in 2020.
I cannot stress this enough, this man was barely 21, and he got swatted in the middle of an event. Something doxxers did on purpose to harm him.
So to people who are trying to act like Dream somehow doesn’t understand how scary doxxing can be, or that he doesn’t have a right to talk about something he personally has experienced several times, please kindly shut the fuck up.
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redrobin-detective · 7 months ago
Did I ever mentioned my AU I had waaaaay back in the day where brand new baby Kon isn’t left alone and passed around the superhero community like a bad Pollyanna gift but is legally adopted by Bruce? So you have Kon, artificially grown with Kryptonian DNA who just wants love and Bruce takes him in and does his best to be a good dad/mentor. Tim is brought in not long after and they train together to be Robin. Now Bruce generally doesn’t have a problem with supers but in his city, the Bats don’t have powers. So Kon undergoes the same rigorous training a human would and he’s trained to hide his powers. 
Since Tim was still kind of a part timer at first with family and school, he and Kon tag team as Robin. Now fam, you know me. Most of my AUs are born out of interesting what ifs/world explorations and things that I think are fucking hysterical. So Kon is mostly good at hiding he’s a meta, like he’s trained to use his powers in a subtle way that most people wouldn’t notice. Kid is straight up a Bat and no one questions. But everyone now and again, he gets like blown up and shot at or something and nothing happens. And Gotham rogues are wigging. 
Every other Robin at least like reacts when they’re shot, this one just kind of shrugs. All the Bats have been human so statistically this one should be to there’s no reason to assume otherwise. It gets funnier when you consider he and Tim are switching out so one week Tim gets hurt and its like ‘oh yeah this Robin’s normal, maybe that incident the other day was just weird lighting’ and then Kon lifts a car one handed to rescue a woman and !!! Gotham has never been more chaotic.
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moridoki · 10 months ago
rules: we’re snooping in your playlist. put your entire music library on shuffle and list the first 10 songs and then choose 10 victims.
tagged by: @c4nnibagrl ( ^ω^ ) !!
(ty for the tag!!! you can really see what my taste is hnabbabagdgsf)
1. dandelion hands - how to never stop being sad
2. crywank - a deer mistaking candles for headlights
3. lemon demon - cabinet man
4. rebzyyx - I’m so crazy for youuu </3
5. mr. kitty - after dark
6. flatsound - regret
7. moe shop - love taste
8. mother mother - the cry forum
9. crywank - now I’m sad (boo hoo)
10. mother mother - o my heart
I’ll tag @funwastaken @yanderequeen2 @donyokunakodomo @yandere-yuuboo and @chu-means-kiss (just ignore that this isn’t 10 people tagged shshshssh)
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that-foul-legacy-lover · a month ago
imagine coming home and not findingn FL at the door, which was really odd for him because he almost always sat at the door when it was getting close for u to come home, and nearly pounced on the door as you would carefully open it, knowing he’d tackle you if he could. He loved giving keeping him a secret a tough time, always anticipating your arrival. But today, he wasn’t there. Even when you walked in further into the kitchen and the living room… no sign of him. Was he okay? You wandered into the bedroom, and. Well. That was definitely a very large lump under the covers. Curled up, the peak of his back nearly touched the ceiling. You walked to the edge of the bed. “Ch-“ before you even got out a word, he had ensnared you in his arms, practically tossing you to the other side of the bed and pulling you into his chest under the covers, leaving you dizzy before you could even blink. 
-my keyboard is being really annoying, I’m also really tired and messed up my name a few times, chain link anon
Childe's arms firm and secure, holding you tightly to his chest. his claws graze lightly at your skin, never pressing enough to draw blood or sting even slightly, but enough to remind you that he's there with you. you, still confused and more than a little worried, lay a bit awkwardly in your monstrous roommate's grasp, squeezing your eyes shut when you feel him nuzzle into the top of your head a little roughly. when you attempt to wriggle away, or at least, loosen Childe's vice grip on you a little, his arms simply cling tighter as a quiet whine slips from his mouth. he still refuses to tell you why he's being so clingy, and your nerves flare when you think about the pile of work on your desk, planting your hands on Childe's arm to push yourself away.
your hands shake. but it's not from your own body- no, it's from his. underneath your palms you can feel Childe trembling lightly, despite the warmth permeating the room; he lays so still on the bed, arms around your waist, but still you can feel him shivering from a chill you can't feel or see.
perhaps the chill is in his mind, thoughts like ice taking over all emotions but fear, and your heart softens alongside your rigid palms. you allow yourself to fall and lean against his chest, dips in his black and purple armor comfortable against your forehead. Childe's grip tightens again, another sound sneaking out, but this time a rumble of satisfaction and relief. his hand move to cradles your head, and you rub your own cheek into his palm as he sets your head back down into the crook of his neck, where you can feel his delicate purrs grow in strength to overtake his trembling.
you still don't know what's wrong. but perhaps, you think as you snuggle deeper into Childe's weighted embrace, you don't need to, as long as you can comfort him.
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andy-clutterbuck · 3 days ago
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4x04 | Indifference
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