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miawin6 · 3 years

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PERCY JACKSON CHARACTERS AS LOVER LYRICS

Percy Jackson

And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you dear

Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?

I never grew up, it's getting so old

Help me hold onto you

I've been the archer, I've been the prey

It's you and me, that's my whole world

We're so sad, we paint the town blue

Kiss me once 'cause you know I had a long night

Kiss me twice 'cause it's gonna be alright

And I can't talk to you when you're like this

Staring out the window like I'm not your favorite town

I'm New York City, I still do it for you, babe

I know that I'm a handful, baby, uh

I know I never think before I jump

I never leave well enough alone

And trouble's gonna follow where I go

Annabeth Chase

How many days did I spend

Thinkin' 'bout how you did me wrong, wrong, wrong?

Lived in the shade you were throwin'

'Til all of my sunshine was gone, gone, gone

And I couldn't get away from ya

In my feelings more than Drake, so yeah

Your name on my lips, tongue tied

Free rent, livin' in my mind

And I would've stuck around for ya

Would've fought the whole town, so yeah

Can I go where you go?

Can we always be this close forever and ever?

And I'm highly suspicious that everyone who sees you wants you

I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all

And I'll never let you go cause I know this is a fight

That someday we're gonna win

He got that boyish look that I like in a man

I am an architect, I'm drawing up the plans

It's like I'm seventeen, nobody understands

And I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends

Twenty questions, we tell the truth

You've been stressed out lately? Yeah, me too

Something gave you the nerve to touch my hand

Call my bluff, call you "babe"

Have my back, yeah, everyday

Piper Mclean

Killing me slow, out the window

I'm always waiting for you to be waiting below

It's a cruel summer with you

Said I'm fine, but it wasn't true

I don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you

I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover

He got my heartbeat skipping down 16th Avenue

Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh

We can follow the sparks, I'll drive

I'm with you even if it makes me blue

Jason Grace

And it's new, the shape of your body

It's blue, the feeling I've got

Quiet my fears with the touch of your hand

Paper cut stings from our paper thin plans

They say home is where the heart is

But that's not where mine lives

It's all me in my head

I'm the one who burned us down

But it's not what I meant, sorry that I hurt you

I don't wanna do, I don't wanna do this to you

I need to say, hey it's all me, just don't go

Meet me in the afterglow

Tell me that it's not my fault, tell me that I'm all you want

Even when I break your heart

Hazel Levesque

My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue

All's well that ends well to end up with you

I want you, bless my soul

And I ain't gotta tell him, I think he knows

And I don't want you to go, I don't really wanna fight

If the story's over

Why am I still writing pages?

Frank Zhang

Combat, I'm ready for combat

I say I don't want that, but what if I do?

I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this

That's right, darling, you're the one I want

This ultraviolet morning light below

Tells me this love is worth the fight

Tell me that you're still mine, tell me that we'll be just fine

Even when I lose my mind

Leo Valdez

They see right through me

I see right through me

Voted most likely to run away with you

I counted days, I counted miles

To see you there, to see you there

And now the storm is coming

I ask the traffic lights if it'll be all right

They say "I don't know"

We were stupid to jump in the ocean separating us

Remember how I'd fly to you?

They say the road gets hard and you get lost when you're led by blind faith, blind faith

But we might just get away with it

I'm the only one of me, baby that's the fun of me

I know you never get just what you see

But I will never bore you, baby

(And there's a lot of lame guys out there)

And you can't spell "awesome" without "me"

Nico di Angelo

Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes

What doesn't kill me makes me want you more

It's cool, that's what I tell 'em

No rules in breakable heaven

Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes

And if I bleed, you'll be the last to know

And I screamed for whatever it's worth

"I love you, " ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?

And, take me out, and take me home

You're my, my, my, my lover

Easy they come, easy they go

I jump from the train, I ride off alone

Dark side, I search for your dark side

But what if I'm alright, right, right, right here?

And I cut off my nose just to spite my face

Then I hate my reflection for years and years

I wake in the night, I pace like a ghost

The room is on fire, invisible smoke

And all of my heroes die all alone

All the king's horses, all the king's men

Couldn't put me together again

Who could stay?

You could stay, you could stay

Gave you too much but it wasn't enough

But I'll be all right, it's just a thousand cuts

And I hate to make this all about me

But who am I supposed to talk to?

What am I supposed to do if there's no you?

I don't wanna look at anything else now that I saw you

I don't wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you

I've been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night

And now I see daylight, I only see daylight

Maybe I've stormed out of every single room in this town

Threw out our cloaks and our daggers because it's morning now

It's brighter now, now

And I can still see it all (In my mind)

All of you, all of me

I once believed love would be (Black and white)

But it's golden (Golden)

I once believed love would be (Burning red)

But it's golden

Like daylight, like daylight

You gotta step into the daylight and let it go

Just let it go, let it go

Reyna Avila Ramírez-Arellano

So cut the headlights, summer's a knife

I'm always waiting for you just to cut to the bone

Every conquest I had made would make me more of a boss to you

I'd be a fearless leader, I'd be an alpha type

And I'm so sick of them coming at me again

'Cause if I was a man, then I'd be the man

I look through the windows of this love

Even though we boarded them up

Chandelier's still flickering here

'Cause I can't pretend it's ok when it's not

And what once was ours is no one's now

I see you everywhere, the only thing we share is this small town

And I ain't trying mess with your self-expression

But I've learned the lesson that stressin'

And obsessin' 'bout somebody else is no fun

And snakes and stones never broke my bones so

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imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl · 3 years

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White Lies (Pt. 15 of 21)

Pairing: Keanu Reeves X Reader

Word count: 1.8 K

Summary: Keanu found the girl almost dead, in the wrecks of what was once her car. While she was in surgery, stuck in a coma, he gathered the best doctors of New York to attend to her. They told him she is likely to have some kind of brain damage, what may lead to memory loss. And this possibility added up wit the fact that she's pregnant, made the council come up with an odd idea. They asked Keanu to pretend to be her husband, since the stress of finding out everything that happened could put the baby in danger. He reluctantly agreed, but only if she does has some kind of memory loss. He still goes she'll wake up soon, with her memories intact.

But when you finally wake up, there's nothing inside. You're quick to find your head is empty, void, like a blank canvas. The only thing that brings you some relief, that makes you feel less lonely is the mention of a husband. And you can't wait to meet him, because you know you can't deal with this by yourself.

<- Previous part (14)

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{Keanu Reeves Masterlist}

{John Wick Masterlist}

The War Between The Mind And The Heart

At the hotel room, you cry on Laura's shoulder. She knew it, of course she did, but despite being furious at her too, you need someone. And you can't call Lucia, even though you know she's the grandmother of your child.

Yesterday, you couldn't sleep. The night was a nightmare, a torture, as you stared into the darkness with memories filling your head. All of them have Keanu in it. And they were good. When the morning finally came, you called Laura and she ran here, made you eat something as you cried and yelled and sobbed. Your head hurts, your throat is sore, and you feel like shit.

“I can't believe he did that. I trusted him with all my heart.” It comes out barely a whisper and you dry your eyes for the hundredth time with a tissue.

“(Y/N), you need to listen to me now,” Laura says, holding both your hands on hers. “You already vented and I listened. But now I must explain what happened.”

You don't think you want to listen. During the night, you even considered going to Argentine with Lucia as soon as the baby is ready to travel. But the very thought of being so far from Keanu crushed your heart, and you felt stupid to hold such felling. So now, you don't know what to do. From your position, back resting on the headrest of the bed, surrounded by pillows, you weakly nod. “Why did he lie to me, Laura? Why did you lie to me?”

She takes a deep breath before speaking. “Keanu found your car, (Y/N). You were bleeding, almost dead. And during the two weeks you were in a coma, the doctors found me, and I was in some of the meetings they had to explain your condition. Keanu paid for the best care, so they were fully dedicated to you. And this story was their idea.” Reaching out her hand, she wipes a tear away. “Daniel died only a week before the accident, and that was the reason behind it. You were sad, crying, with the pregnancy test in your bag, so you got overwhelmed in the road and crashed.” Laura makes a small pause as if gathering her thoughts. “Dr. Wright told us back there was a high chance you'd have some kind of brain damage, memory loss. So they asked Keanu if he could... Play this role, putting it in their words. Any kind of stress would put the baby in even more danger, and they thought you'd feel better to know you had someone with you.”

Looking down at your hands, you think about this new information. So Keanu didn't pull this off by himself. You get it now, why some instructions were meant to him. But still, you don't know what to think.

“He didn't want to do it. I was there when he said it wouldn't be fair to you.” Laura squeezes your hand a little. “But both you and the baby could die depending on how you'd receive the news. So he accepted.”

“But Laura, I... I fell for him. Call me an idiot, but I did.” Your voice breaks, and you try really hard not to sob again. “And the worst part is that I still love him. What am I supposed to do now?”

“Keanu fell in love with you too.” She speaks slowly as if knowing it would make you break down a little more. And it does. With both hands covering your face, you cry all over again. “And yes, I spoke to him about it. He... He wanted to tell you everything after your trip to Miami, but he couldn't.”

“Why are you helping him?” You mutter, holding back a sob.

“I'm just telling you the truth. All of it.” Moving to sit beside you, she hugs one of the spare pillows. “After the... The first time you slept together was the first time Keanu called me. Before it was always me calling to get some updates on your condition.” Turning your head to look at her, you put a strand of hair behind your ear. “He was feeling so guilty, he couldn't believe what he did.”

“What did he say?”

“He cursed himself for not stopping. For keeping the lie for so long. He was about to tell you everything but I had to stop him because the doctors were still worried about your state.”

There's a war happening inside you. Your brain tells you to forget Keanu, to move away from New York, to hate him for all the lies. But the heart, wild creature, says otherwise. It aches for him, it calls, it longs for him. And you want to cave in.

“I hate that I love him.” You mumble, hands caressing your belly. This isn't how you thought the pregnancy would end.

“Can I... Can I ask you something? On Keanu's behalf?” Laura speaks low, and you furrow your eyebrows before looking at her. “I know he's not the father, but he does love your child as if he was... So, please... If you do love him, even if you hate the way you feel, don't take the child away from him. At least... At least let him visit, wherever you decide to go, if you decide to go somewhere else.”

Her words make more tears roll down. It may not be fair with Daniel, but you do wish Keanu was the father. Liam knows his voice, as well as he knows yours. Ever since the obstetrician said the baby could listen and was able to distinguish the voices, you both started talking even more to the bump. You wonder if he'd miss Keanu as much as you already do.

“I don't know what to do... Liam's bedroom is there.” Your home is there, with him. “Tell me what to do, Laura. And I'll do it.” Begging, you run a hand through your hair.

“I can't. You must figure that out by yourself.” Laura bumps her shoulder against yours playfully. “Have you spoken to Lucia?”

“I still don't like her.”

“You never did.” She adds, giggling. “Neither did Daniel. But I believe she'll head back to Argentina after the baby is born and maybe call once a month and visit on Christmas. But other than that she'll disappear.”

You probably shouldn't feel so relieved, but that's exactly the feeling that washes over you. “Laura... What... Did Keanu had any plans? For what he'd do after telling me the truth?” This is something you've been wondering all night, but still, you're not sure you want to know. But now that the words left your mouth, and there's no way you can take them back.

“(Y/N), Keanu wants to marry you.” Laura's voice gets lower, and as she stares at you, your eyes are glued to the blue wall across the room. “A real wedding. A ceremony, a party... Everything. But he was expecting this.”

“Expecting what?” You burst out.

“That you would never want to meet him again.”

Shaking your head lightly, you look at your hands. Could you even do that? Would you have the strength to stay away from him? It's only been a night and half the day, but you already miss him. “I don't know what to do... And I don't really have much time to think.”

“How close is the baby?”

“Very close. This is week 38, so the doctors said I should be prepared even though it may still take a week or two.” Both your hands lay on your belly, huge and swollen. It started to lower a little, and you know it's another sign that your time is coming. And that makes more tears fill your eyes. “I'm so scared, Laura...”

“I can imagine.” Putting an arm around your shoulders, she kindly smiles. “You know you have me, right? Call and I'll get here as fast as I can. And if you want, you can stay with me. The apartment isn't big and I don't have space for an extra bedroom for the baby but you'll be welcome and we'll make it work.”

“Thank you, Laura.” Crying again, you hug her the best you can with your belly getting in the way.

“You're welcome, honey.” She let go of you, and you take a deep breath. “I'll have to go now, I have a client on the other side of city and it's a hell of a long drive. Will you be ok?”

“Yes.” You won't, but you can't tell her that. “I'll call you if anything happens.”

“Alright, honey.” After some more goodbyes, Laura leaves and you're left alone again.

The silence is deafening. This damn hotel room makes you feel sick, so you lock yourself in the bathroom to take a long shower. It doesn't help. The tears and the water become one, and you can't tell the difference. There's this heavy feeling in your chest, like you're suffocating. Everything you knew ever since you woke up is a lie. Liam is the only real thing, and now, he won't have a father.

“Do you miss him too, baby?” You ask him, voice so weak you can barely hear yourself above the spray of water.

You wish he could answer, you wish some kind of miracle happened to push you in the right direction... And you know, deep inside, that your heart wants this path to lead back to Keanu.

An hour later, you're leaving the bathroom with the towel wrapped around your body, using another to finish drying your hair. Standing by the bed, you pick some clothes from your open baggage, choosing something comfortable to sleep in. Then suddenly, a sharp pain rips through your abdomen, moving down your thighs and back. Bending over, you bite down a groan. When the pain is starting to fade away, you feel something flowing down your thighs, soaking the floor under your feet.

You freeze, trying to process what happened. Moving away from the puddle, you sit on the bed using the towel, still damp because of your hair, to clean your legs the best you can, but another wave of pain comes, making yell this time. It's happening. It's happening right now and you're completely alone. Laura is too far away, and you don't want to call Lucia.

You could call 911. Or the reception, they'd find a way to help, but there's only one person in the world you need right now. And despite your brain telling you not to give in so easily, the pain is becoming greater, ripping through your body, and it feels like you broke a bone on your hip.

Sucking in a sharp breath, you reach for your phone on the nightstand, struggling a little since your sight is all blurry by the tears. When you find his number, you make the call, lying down and pulling your feet up.

“(Y/N)?” He sounds weird, voice weak and sad. But you don't have time to overthink, to try and find answers. You need him immediately. You're about to answer when the pain hits again, and you yell, voice breaking into a cry in the end. “(Y/N), what's going on?”

“My water broke.” You mutter, breathing heavily. “I need you.”

@multific @inumorph @aestheticallywinchester @bvbwestfall @liviiii98 @allie1804-fan @gian-giannina @playboygeniusphilanthropist @partypoison00 @mariafetamina @fortheloveoffanfic @trin303

#keanu reeves x reader #keanu reeves imagine #keanu reeves fanfiction #keanu reeves fanfic #keanu reeves #imagine keanu reeves

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fakeloveaskblog · 3 years

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Hi, Remus! It's me again. Your friendly neighborhood nonbinary demon! I brought you another stuffie, this one's certified to the waterproof. *excited whispering* It's a mini-kraken. I'll uh, I'm talking a bit more quietly today because I know you've got company. Company we're both quite fond of, might I add. How are they? How have you been also? And I'd like to ask what Remy told you and what you think about this whole situation by the way? (Though only if you'd feel comfortable telling me?)

(mentions of U!Virgil)

Your voice came through right as Remus was close to stacking all of his stuffies on top of Remy, who was still sleeping, it was a mighty tower of fluff!

The mini-kraken bounced down on top of his head. He flinched and looked up "God????" He saw the kraken "OH BA-" He stopped and lowered his voice to not wake them "oh baaaby!!! thanks! I can give her big bloody claws!"

"I have been.....good" He lied "Great even. Spectacular. Like a hypothetical public execution where they stuff me full of fireworks before making me explode into a cascade of light!"

He carefully placed the mini-kraken on top of the tower of fluff. He sat on the floor right by the couch. The air stenched of alcohol and cigarette smoke. Rowan was going to lose her mind when she came home.

"Remy is feeling kind...how do I put this.....dragged through an ocean of sharp rocks to hell and back right now. I just wanna see them be all happy again like they deserve to be. I will have you know I would sacrifice several other people's toenails to make that happen!! I don't wanna see them sad!!"

(He didn't want to see them drunk either. He honestly hated being around drunk people....but it was Remy....so that made it just a bit more bearable)

"Umh what they told me? Everything Logan has said!! So I wanna hit him with a truck! Or put a really loud airhorn by his ear so his ears explode and his head starts bleeding!"

Remus twirled the ring on his finger while biting the inside of his cheek.

"They also told me all that stuff about how uhh Virgil kinda yells at them when he gets too anxious and uh how he calls them lazy and annoying and uh stupid and a burden kinda often and uh how they ehm kinda tend to dress differently when they're with him and uhm act different since he uhh gets anxious really easily about them like leaving him or cheating or looking at other guys and stuff like that y'know"

He twirled the ring faster.

"So y'know normal stuff. Like teasing and normal arguments. Or I guess maybe they should look into some couples therapy?? A lot of arguments isn't good I think. But teasing is kinda normal y'know so yeah. I don't get Jannie's and LoLo's reactions. They're just being overemotional and delusional and stuff like that ehm yeah. I mean it's kinda sweet if he gets so anxious about Remy leaving them isn't it? Kinda cute. kinda dorky. Like a beheaded chipmunk"

"babe?"

Remus turned around to see Remy rubbing their eyes open. They looked delirious. And yet they tried to get up.

"i need to get home- viv is gonna be worried- he's gonna think im hurt or dead or with someone- i need to- i need to-" They slurred out.

"You need some water and sleep" He gently held them back so they laid down again "You can tell him the therapy session messed you up, you got drunk and lost time okay?"

"mhmm. sound good" They made grabby hands towards him "need my stinky boo"

Remus tensed a bit. He didn't like cuddling drunk people either. But he didn't want to say no and be rude. He laid down next to them. They churned their face into the slope of his neck and moved their arms around him, they were clinging on like a koala honestly.

"i feel so sick" They mumbled out "alcohol is too much- too much cal-"

"You'll sleep it off"

"mhm"

Remus looked at them. In their half awake state and realized he could probably say anything and they wouldn't remember it.

He took their hand and pressed a kiss to the circular scar on their wrist. It made them shudder from how much more they wanted.

"...Remy my fav color has always been green. Obviously. It's slime, zombies and boogers. But ehm....I didn't have a specific fav green until I saw your eyes. They're my favorite color. Ever since I met you I've been seeing that color everywhere. it makes me happy every time I see it, every time I see you" He confessed.

Remy very unceremoniously puked a bit in their mouth before passing out again. Remus stayed cuddling them, he wouldn't leave them until they told him to.

#ask #resleep #rem^2 #remus sanders #lets hope my brain was just waiting for me to finish this and will let me pass out now please #sorry if anything is bad i cant sleep im so out f it i am a npc in a video game glitched between 2 walls

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rosezure · 3 years

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You'll always have to be okay

Trigger/content warnings:

Abusive relationships, trauma, injuries, somewhat graphic descriptions, swearing, abusive parents, fighting, yelling, abusive and demeaning language, panic attacks, gaslighting.

I wrote this based on something that recently happened to me. This is just my way of coping with it, my way of processing a mess no one wanted. Because it's so recent, it's still a fresh wound, and it may not sit right with many. So don't read it if you feel like it may hurt you or trigger you. I added tags to this post so if anyone has these tags blacklisted, they won’t see it. Please stay safe, be kind, and gentle.

You're 21, held down by unreachable expectations from your own parents. These parents happen to see you as free labor. They also see you as an extension of their own narcissistic and perfect image of themselves. If you don't fit, you're punished. Not cutely. Not with time outs or a smack to the ass. No. You get beaten up. You get twenty to thirty smacks to your ass with a wooden spoon or plastic flip-flops. You get thrown into your room like a rag doll or dragged from the dinner table. When you outgrow the more physical punishments, it's the psychological torture that becomes their favorite: "Where did we go wrong?", "You're an ungrateful brat!", "You got harassed? That's your fucking fault, slut!", "Stop dressing like a whore, you'll make the town talk about us.", "What's that? You think you have an opinion? You're stupid and ignorant, but you're our personal little trophy to parade with, so shut up!", "You're not working for us, your ‘work’ is too easy! You're helping us out of your rightly devoted heart, we're not paying you.", "I'd rather get in debt than give you money so you can have your own life.".

All this, the invalidating, gaslighting, and so much more. You're essentially stuck: they're all you've know, they made sure of that. The first and only example of consistent “love”. You're dependent on them, emotionally due to the abuse and financially too cause you work for them, so you have no means to free yourself. You endure that for 21 years. You only get access to therapy, much to your abusers' chagrin, recently. You're trying so hard. But everything hurts. And it's all exhausting.

Now you're aware of the system they've built to confine you. Now you understand why you're so fucked up. The only two people you thought were the ones that should love you, fucking destroyed you. Your world comes crashing down. The pieces are flying everywhere. The debris is dangerously closing in on you. And you can do nothing but stand and watch. You don't have time to try and fix yourself up. You have to find ways to escape, but you’re stuck. You have friends to love and support, you want to be there for them, bleeding or not, so you try to act like it’s all okay.

But you're only human. And a piece of huge debris lands right on your legs.

You're immobile now. You can’t stand. Can't crawl. Can't even breathe properly. You're screaming. Blinded to everything but the blood and bones coming out of your legs. You’re hyperventilating. You’re having panic attack after panic attack.

You cry out for help. Two people hear, two people you love and trust. They'll surely help you, they've said time and time again how they'd be there for you no matter what. You scream for them to help you, showing your state, and trying to tell them how much it hurts.

You think they see the debris flying. But maybe they don't. Maybe that's why they didn't see the debris on your legs. You cry to them. They know you, they'll help, right? They sure try. They try to pull you out from beneath the debris. They pull you with all their might, but now your arms are threatening to detach from your body.

You tell them to stop. It hurts even more now. Your arms are ripping from your body. "But we're trying to help!" The pain is too overwhelming to explain that they are worsening the case. Your screaming is too loud for you to hear the harsh words you're saying. You're blinded by the pain of it all.

They can't see the debris. So they tell you they're really trying to pull you up but you won't budge, you're not cooperating. You're overreacting.

You understand that. You really do. But the pain is so intense. You're bleeding out and they're talking about cooperation and being stubborn. It infuriates you. You just want them to sit by you, give you moral support because it seems like you're gonna have to move the debris on your legs yourself, then they can drag you somewhere safe. But they're insisting, they're really trying but it's hurting you more and more the harsher they pull. So you just blow up. You get furious, you yell back at them. These are people that knew your world was unstable. You're angry that you haven't been able to explain what's happening and how they can help but they're hurting you now and you can't take that much pain at once so you cut off the pain that's easiest to remove for now.

They've hurt you, not just because of your arms but their words too. "Overreacting." "Stubborn." "Not cooperating." Words you've heard from someone else, someone that deeply wounded you.

They leave you.

You're now in more pain, and alone. You have to remove the debris yourself, no one can do that for you. Despite how angry and in pain you were, it would've been better if they had stayed. You feel sad now, you feel betrayed and completely alone. Not only did they hurt you more, they actually left. That's on you, you understand that. However, you feel awful because you've helped them with their issues, even if you were bleeding, or in pain, you did your best to try and understand what was going on to help them. You held their hand when they were under their own pieces of debris. Why couldn't they do the same?

More panic attacks. You’re desperate, hopeless.

You finally get the debris off and manage to somehow, very badly, tend to your bleeding and torn legs. You're still in pain, but you find a way to crawl and find something to make crutches with. Now's when you try to go after the two people that tried helping you, to thank them for trying, apologize for whatever you said or did that may have hurt them, and maybe explain what happened.

You find them and thank them. But they don't respond. They don't even seem to hear you. You try to apologize. This time they do hear you, and they say you hurt them beyond repair. You broke them. You left them feeling destroyed, bruised, and forsaken. You villainized them, they say.

You hear this with pain and anger. Pain because you never wanted to hurt them. You acknowledge that what you said was hurtful, even if you weren't 100% aware of what you were saying or doing. You try to explain what you were going through and what had happened from your perspective, so they can understand why it happened, not to justifiy it but to shed some light on the situation. But they shut you down. No, it seems their pain is above yours. You broke their trust and their respect for you.

Now comes the anger: At the moment you needed them most, the moment they needed to just sit with you, they almost tore your arms out and now they're saying you're the one that did the most damage? No. Fuck no. You're livid. But you understand, they're in pain too. They've also had some debris fall on them recently. You understand.

You just needed someone to hold your hands, not tear you more. But now they want to play pain Olympics. It feels that way, even if it’s not their intention at all. You were disappointed by your own expectations, something you should’ve never created. They’re not going to apologize for almost tearing your arms out and leaving you for dead. That’s okay. So you tell them you understand, you keep the pain to yourself. You tell them they can take however much time they need to heal from your words. They deserve it. They don’t have to be your friends anymore if it’s too much. You'll be okay.

You'll always have to be okay.

#personal #mine #abusive relationships #abusive parents #trauma #injuries #graphic description #fighting #yelling #abusive language #panic attack #gaslighting

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laromurl · 4 years

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Bleach Fanfic

Uryu Ishida x Utsuko Nisenosei (oc)

Slight angst, fluff

....

"Uryu." Her voice was soft and broken but she got his attention away from the night sky outside his window.

"Utsuko. What are you doing here?" He was calm and soft. It has been almost a year since they spoke. Even at school he avoids her. After what Kisuke admitted to him about her fate, he just couldn't bring himself to do anything. Admitting his feelings was already a mistake.

"Ichigo told me you got hurt. I wanted to see you. Who did this?" Utsuko cautiously entered the room and even moved to his side. She extended her hand with the purpose of touching him but he flinched away from her.

It wouldn't do any good for both of them if he promised her sweet nothings when she was just going to leave him. "I don't know but I'm fine Utsuko. You didn't have to come." Her turned away from her causing a stinging turmoil in her chest. She rose her hand to her heart to steady her breathing.

She stayed silent for a couple seconds hoping he would atleast look at her again but after he didn't, she cleared the painful ball from her throat. "How much longer are you going to punish me Uryu? We were doing so good after Aizen, and then..." She trailed off because honestly she didn't understand why he was avoiding her.

When he didn't say anything she breathed low and turned her eyes to the ground. "I-I just wanted to say that I love you. You don't have to say it again. I just wanted you to know."

Uryu turned to her, his heart beating a thousand times faster than normal. His cheeks flushed red. "Utsu-"

"Her fate is to die for the soul king. For the balance of the world." Kisuke's words resounded though his head cutting out everything he desperately wanted to tell her.

Uryu cleared his throat. "Utsuko. Let me be clear, we are not meant to be together. Please get over me." His eyes sofftened and he turned his eyes from her. She was his weakness and he was hers.

"Uryu."

He picked up his eyes, this time locking them on her and furrowing his eyebrows ina stern manner to show her that he was absolutely serious. "I don't love you. I made a mistake."

Utsuko's eyes widened for a second as she painfully processed his words. She didn't believe him but she also knew he was trying to keep her away so she simply nodded. "I understand. This is goodbye then." She walked away hoping that he would stop her but by the time she got the hall and she couldn't hear anything from his room. She ran.

She ran and ran until her feet hurt away from the hospital. Away from the stupid pain in her heart. Away from him.

...

Ginjo swiped his sword across Utsuko's chest giving her barely enough time for her to take out her sword. She was pushed back towards the mansion hitting the roof with a loud bang!

Uryu watched the whole exchange and quickly jumped to her aide. "Utsuko!?" He grabbed her arm through the dust but she swatted it away. She way annoyed. He only came to her rescue. Only when he wanted to protect her.

"In fine Uryu. He can't hurt me." She grabbed his arm for help to stand giving Uryu acess to her spiritual pressure.

"Utsuko your spiritual pressure is fading what did you do?" But he already knew. Kisuke had told him that aftet her visit to the hospital, she went to Kisuke. She went to him to give up her powers. She knew about her fate. Of course she did.

Utsuko pulled away and wiped the blood off her mouth getting the next attack ready. She glared at Ginjo who sneered at her. Ichigo was standing infront of the captains and lieutenants that came to help but noone was moving.

Her power was fading. She cursed her powers for leaving so soon, but looking at Uryu she felt a relief in her chest. Through this they can finally be together. They finally get to be normal. Just one more fight.

She lifted her weapon and glared at Ginjo. Suddenly she felt a pirecing pain in her stomach and when she looked down she saw the illuminating yellow light of Ginjo's fullbringer.

"Utsuko!" Uryu scream pulled Utsuko from her shock and she, instinctively, held her hand to her stomach. "Ur-" she lunged forward coughing out blood and the pain took over her body.

Shit. I'm going to die.

Uryu stood up feeling his spiritual pressure fluctuated a thousand times fold as he turned to Ginjo with rage pouring out his body.

....

Utsuko awoke in her room disoriented at first. It took her a few seconds to process that she was back home and the strong smell coming from her kitchen. She got up slowly and finally noticed the change in her body. She could smell the food but she didn't know who it was. She couldn't pick up any spiritual pressure.

Her powers were officially gone. Now she didn't have to die for the soul king. All he needed was her power anyway.

That brought her some relief. Maybe now Uryu can admit he loves her. Maybe now they can be together.

She planted her feet in the cold hardwood, missing her house slippers by a few inches, when the door opened and the light was switched on.

"Utsuko don't move yet. Your bandages will open!" Uryu moved to the nightstand and placed the tray of food he had. He bent in front of her and pulled her shirt up to reveal bandages wrapped around her torso.

"H-Hey! Don't just lift my shirt!" She flushed bright red and she muttered out. Pain shot through her back when she abruptly pulled away from Uryu.

Her agonizing scream freaked him out for a second. "Utsuko get back in bed. I'll bring more bandages." He ran out of the room leaving Utsuko in pain, trying to get back to her bed.

When the pain subsided and Uryu changed her bandages, he cleared his throat moving his redddening face away from her chest. Her had changed her before but now that she was awake and blushing too, it was all just so...tense.

"Uryu what happened?" She asked softly. "After I lost conciousness."

Uryu sighed and sat on the bed bwside her bringing the try to his lap. It was fish soup. Her favorite.

"Captain Toshiro Hitsugaya froze your wounds to stop the bleeding and I brought you back here. Ichigo won against Ginjo and I think he's on his way to the soul society."

"Oh." She was happy Ichigo won.

"How long have I been unconcious. I don't have any of my power left." She looked at her hands to see if she could see anything.

"A week." He muttered. "The first day you seemed to be healing pretty quickly but because of that you lost the remainder of your power." His voice lowered as if he was telling a sad story but to Utsuko there was nothing sad about it.

She giggled, groaning when the laughter pained her stomach. Uryu looked at her confused but she leaned on his shoulder and wrapped her arm around his. "Can you tell me you love me now?"

Uryu quickly stood up almost spilling the tray. He grew stern looking down at her. His lips were pursed and he furrowed his eyebrows to show his disapproval. And she understood. She pulled back to her bed and he stood silent for a few seconds before walking out of her room. Utsuko didn't follow him.

It was true that he had told her he loved her once but ever since that he has made it his mission to avoid her. To disdain her. But then he shows up to rescue her and even brings her back to health. His problem would be gone if he had let her die.

Anger arose in her and she had to say it. It was time she didn't bite her tongue anymore.

Carefully but hastily, she got up and followed the sound of dishes clanking in the sink. Uryu had his back to her. His sleeves rolled up, half the dishes done. For some reason this calmed her down and she moved a chaur to sit.

Uryu jumped at the sudden noise. "Utsuko, you should-"

"Be in bed. I know. I know. Im just tired of being in my room." She breathed out. She wanted to lean ocer the table but she only got so far before the wound began to hurt.

"Hey be careful!" Uryu jumped to her rescue once again. Remembering this, made her angry again.

"Uryu stop! I'm fine!" She smacked his hand away.

He stopped and looked down at her. "Im trying to help."

"I know." She said bluntly. "That's all you ever do."

"What do you mean?"

She snapped her head to meet his eyes in disbelief. "It will help me if you stopped helping me. I don't need you to be there only when I'm in trouble."

"Utsuko-"

"No Uryu." She interrupted him. She was so exhausted. "I'm tired of explanations. I'm tired of us teetering around the subject. If you are feeling guilty because you don't love me then stop. I forgive you. Just...go live your life and stop worrying about mine!" Their eyes were locked and hers were never wavering showing her adamant stand.

"I don't want someone who doesn't love me." She continued. "If you stopped coming around to my rescue, I would get over you."

"That's not what I'm trying to do Utsuko. You don't have any powers because of me! A-And if I tell you...if I admit it...you'll always be in danger."

"Then don't and leave."

That surprised him. Utsuko was always fighting for him. Always telling him that danger didn't matter to her as long as she had him. But she didn't have him either way. Not really. Uryu was the one pulling away, he was the one who had all the power over this relationship. Why couldn't he just choose? What did he even feel? Could he answer that?

He took a step forwards towards the door trying to make up his mind of what to say or how to say it. He couldn't bring himself to leave Utsuko even if she was telling him to but he also couldn't say what she wanted him to say. He couldn't put that pressure on her.

Utsuko lowered her eyes into her hands waiting for him to pass by her side and out the door. He watched carefully as her featured changed from stern to solemn. She was sad and it was his fault.

What could he say now?

He took a few more steps giving her the power to stop him because at that moment if she had told him to kiss her he would have but she kept quiet.

It wasn't her choice anymore. He got up to the brim of the door before growing frustrated. It was all on him! And what did he want?

Without sparing another second, he grabbed her chin and picked up her face. Those beautiful brown eyes had done it for him once and they keep doing it for him. He tightened his fingers on her chin and pulled her to his lips. He was so slow and careful at first it was infuriating for her to wait but she did and it was worth it. She grabbed his cheeks and stood up in her toes. Then she moved her arms around his neck while he moved his to her waist being weary of the bandages.

They only pulled away to catch their breath but it was a perfect oppurtuntiy for him to look her in the eyes and say, "I want you. I love you."

Utsuko smiled wide, not daring to hide the emotions bubbling in her or the tears brimming her eyes. "Finally." She scoffed jokingly. He laughed with her and leaned down to kiss her again and again and again for the rest of their time together.

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