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hayaku14 · 1 year

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my fave hc about hakuba is that he thinks he's all prim and proper. he certainly tries to present himself as one, but the moment he's with hattori he gets sucked into their petty competitiveness where they end up throwing playground insults and basically devolving into grade schoolers; he lets himself be dragged into whatever mess kaito is cooking up, even though he should know better, because he thinks he should act as the voice of reason when in reality he's just really curious and would deny ever joining in the said act if he ever did (he does); and when he's with shinichi you'd think they'd be all fine and dandy because they both love mysteries and sherlock holmes but they quickly realize that their type of mystery books besides sherlock holmes are completely different. they also discover that they love sherlock holmes for vastly different reasons and so every Sherlock Talk turns into a heated Sherlock Debate and according to kaito and hattori, it is seriously one of the nerdiest exchanges they've ever witnessed in their entire lives.

at one point someone finally points it out to him, "hey hakuba i thought you were a really calm and unapproachable dude but you actually have no fucking chill lol"

he brings this up to shinichi and shinichi's like, "yeah you don't, why do you think hattori and kaito still likes hanging out with you even when they claim that, and i quote, "your existence is insufferable and that you have a stick up your ass."

"gee thanks, kudou."

"you're welcome."

#hakuba saguru #kudou shinichi #hattori heiji #kuroba kaito #dcmk #detective conan #gosho boys #dc prattles #the man has no fucking chill like who tf drops everything in his homeland moves into another country #just cos he wants to catch a thief LOL #(he's just another zenigata pretending to be chill LOL)#gosho boys are all gremlins and menaces but theyre on a spectrum #they wreak havoc in different ways #i cannot expand on this i need more braincells to brainrot lol #also i love the idea of shinichi and hakuba being all 'EEEY A SHERLOCKIAN!!!!!' but then immediately going 'no NO YOURE WRONG'#'that is NOT the correct way to appreciate sherlock holmes!!!!!!!'#also their fave SH book differs so thats a whole other mess lmao #but also they both hate bbc sherlock LOL (personally love bbc sherlock but i think it's funny for hakushin to hate it lol)#HAKUSHIN HATE WATCHES BBC SHERLOCK OMG!!!!!!!! But they agree benedict cumberbatch is great because i said so 😤#also shinichi thinks hakuba is a little silly for wearing a deerstalker and basically cosplaying sherlock holmes unironically LMAO #TO HAKUBA'S DISMAY AND KAITO'S JOY LOL #hattori dgaf cos he stans the QUEEN #btw if u squint you'll see how i sneaked a kaishin there LOL #hehehe head empty u already know it

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toasteaa · 1 month

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In the spirit of the potion hop event: What kind of potions would Neuvilette and Zhongli like? What about Eclair? How would a scene with her going to the potion shop and talking with Traveler look like?

So I hadn't started playing the event when I first got this question but now that I'm almost done with it, I feel like I can give a more accurate answer -

As far as Zhongli is concerned, there's no actual need for him to get any of the Traveler's potions. He's lived long enough and has experienced enough to the point of being comfortable in both halves of his world: the adepti still address him as a friend and humans recognize him as a trusted consultant and confidant. If he were to request a potion, it would likely be something rather spontaneous.

There's a best selling Constitution potion with relaxing effects? Sure, he'll try it. A Charisma potion that smells like qixing atop the mountains? A nostalgic scent that he'll keep for himself. Surprise him; he's always extremely fond of the unexpected.

Neuvillette on the other hand...as the current assumed leader of Fontaine, he's had to step into a role that he isn't entirely acclimated to. As the Chief Justice - and solely as the Chief Justice - his roles were limited to that of the courts and the Palais. He was visible enough to be known, but he was the Hydro Archon's right hand. He moved when she did. When she spoke, the nation listened - himself included. Lady Furina was the leader; he's been thrust into the role without much (if any) time to adjust to it. The stress that has come with this has been...unforgiving. But it's also brought his severe lack of interpersonal social skills back into his mind.

While he's not one to be nervous exactly, Neuvillette is aware of how stilted he can be and how his general demeanor can be off-putting to others. If he had the opportunity, he might be inclined to request a potion that increases Charisma while also keeping the consumer relaxed. Not so much because he wants to be more likable (or more approachable), but so he can handle his increased workload and his abilities as a leader are not compromised by his increased exhaustion. It's much easier to stay focused and amicable when stress doesn't cloud your mind.

As for Eclair, hmm...I think she would have been pulled in to do a little "investigating" after the Traveler's potions reached Fontaine's borders. She'll do a little snooping around, probably get Paimon a little worried they did something wrong, and reassure the pair that she's there in an unofficial capacity. She's not on any cases at the moment, but heard about the Traveler taking on new endeavors in the realm of alchemy and potion making. And she was curious! For such high praises to be sung about how the Traveler's potions have increased productivity in the Bureau, Eclair wants to see first hand how effective they can be. As well as seeing if there are any potential drawbacks from them.

Eclair is, of course, always open to having risks taken and trying something new. If she were to make a request, it would likely be for something that could help keep an investigator focused and alert while also keeping their wits about them. While some independent investigators handle smaller, more social cases, Eclair and the rest of the Investigations Bureau handle more...challenging cases. Cases that can (and do) disturb most civilians. If she could get something that could help keep the mind clear yet focused so an investigator doesn't misstep in a crucial time, that would be ideal.

#toast talks #genshin impacted #these were fun little things to think about #I actually love the event! It's been one of my faves in a long time!#makes my little gremlin mind happy. Especially since I was the kid that threw grass and flowers and water together and said 'potion'#bringing advanced potions to my sweeties to help them feel better muwah muwah #Also if *I* (or Eclair really) had to request a potion for Neuvi. It would definitely be one to get him to relax and unwind for once #Take a break old man. Take a nap. I have thigh pillows. They're this big for a reason. Bring me your head for some hair brushies 🤲🏾💕#do I even put this in the main tags when Eclair is sitting there beneath the cut? why not #zhongli #neuvillette #genshin zhongli #genshin neuvillette #oc tag: Eclair Dumont #Okay time to get back to work 🫡

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underhanded-lamb · 1 year

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Someone save this theater kid he is not okay

#Fnaf security breach #fnaf sun #fnaf moon #fnaf daycare attendant #when your faves get new lore #i love the idea that moon is just the worst gremlin like thats just how he acts leave him be #meanwhile theater major sun is such a vibe like-#thank you oobbbear you were so right the idea of sun being clueless and out of his element is just so very chefs kiss #lambs art #shitpost #sorry this is messy y'all

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kaleidoscopic-quiddity · 2 years

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ok nobody asked me to elaborate but heres my pjo a(ro)spec headcanons

piper: aromantic lesbian

the whole false memories thing with juno made shit SO difficult to figure out

like she was a 16yro girl, already struggling to figure out her place in the world vis a vi being nattive, being mixed, being adhd and dyslexic, and then her baby aro lesbian ass gets fake memories of a boyfriend??

her thing with jason was the biggest instance comphet+compallo attraction in existence okay

its not until piper gets away from the questing/camper life and subsequently, the aphrodite cabin, that she starts realising how she feels about romance and re-evaluating some stuff

considering her relationship with shel, i see her as romance positive/favourable but she defo has some complex feelings going on there

speaking of, piper was so focused on the revelation that she was aro that it took her a while to figure out she was lesbian too

she kind of assumed she was some flavour of ace for a while but other sapphics around camp clocked her and gently nudged her towards the realisation of ‘yes you dont feel that way about guys. but have you considered: women?’

piper: i thought not wanting to date anyone meant i didnt want to kiss anyone, but... i think.. i want to kiss girls

piper bolting awake at 3am after a dream about her time on the argo ii: oh shit i totally was into annabeth wasnt i?

leo: aromantic bi demi-grey-asexual

oh gods leo valdez

he has zero fucking clue he’s anything but straight and allo until reyna casually mentionsn one day that her and a lot of the other hunters are asexual

he’s only ever heard of gay, bi and lesbian so he asks reyna what ‘asexual’ means

cue the most epiphany prompting conversation of leo’s life

leo voice: wait so you’re telling me that there are some people who just like, arent interesting in sex, at all? and not only that, but ppl can feel that way about romance too?

once terms like demi and grey start getting thrown around too he kinda has a freak out and reyna sends him off with a book abt asexuality and aromanticism + some awkward advice

three months of introspection and more than a few breakdowns later leo figures out that hes aro, hes demi-grey-ace, and that that is most likely why his relationship with calypso didnt exactly work out

(he also thinks the terms cupioromantic and/or quoiromantic/sexual might aply to him but hes not wholly sure)

just like piper he had some major compallo going on, he just thought being ‘girl crazy’ was how guys his age were supposed to act and never questioned why it felt like more of a joke for him rather than his true feelings

he figures out the bi part once he goes to college and is like cmon man i already had one sexuality crisis do i really gotta do this shit again

jason: aromantic straight demisexual

jason wasnt raised with as much allo/amatonormativity as other ppl bc he was literally raised by wolves then the legion, but juno yoinking his memories kinda fucked with that

once again, serious case of compallo in regards to piper, he knew he found her pretty and liked her as a friend and didnt understand for a long time that a crush was supposed to be ‘different’ or ‘more than that’

jason struggles with his sense of identity and definitely has this strong heroic leader persona he puts up and well, the hero always gets the girl doesnt he?

he died before he got the chance to really figure out that he was a(ro)spec (and that there were words for what he was feeling) but he knew he felt different about romance and sex than most other teens

the fact that he was more worried about them not being friends anymore rather than losing his girlfriend when piper broke up with him kinda tipped him off

he did have some pretty big queerplatonic feelings for both piper and leo though which in hindsight kind of explains, other than the trauma, why he bonded with them so quickly

annabeth: biromantic asexual

a decent number of athena kids are aspec (their mom literally conceives via a ‘meeting of intelligent minds’, no sex required at all) so she kinda slot herself pretty easily into the ‘asexual’ label after realising that despite dating percy for literal years, she had zero interesting in getting more ‘physical’ with him

(percy is allo but doesnt give a shit about sex if annabeth doesnt give a shit about it. he’s just happy to be close to her)

precisely because of the fact that’d she’d been dating percy for years meant that figuring out the biromantic part took ages lmao

it feels really obvious to her in hindsight

annabeth: ‘oh gods percy i had a crush on thalia, i had a crush on clarisse, i had a flirtationship with piper, i almost had a crush on reyna’

percy, in the middle of his own bi crisis: i know the feeling wisegirl

she doesnt really,, do much?? after figuring out shes bi, annabeth’s already happily in a committed , monogamous relationship, but it feels nice for her to have learned something new about herself

overall i see her as sex neutral/indifferent, she doesnt hate the idea but its not something she’d really intentionally seek out

as mentioned, percy is pretty sex neutral/indifferent (but like, in the allo way) too so the two of them just never really bother lol

quickfire bonus round:

reyna, evidently, is our canon allo-ace queen. this isnt a headcanon i just like reminding people :) she’s also bi/pan oriented (she uses both terms interchangeably)

thalia is aroace and has never once gotten what all the hype is about, she assumed people were joking or like at least overexaggerating when they talked about romance and sex

artemis/diana is also aroace obviously (apollo is pan tho, theyre twins they balance each other out)

frank is demisexual n straight

calypso is demisexual and demi-lithromantic, pan oriented

travis stoll is allo-ace, connor stoll is aro-allo, they think this is hilarious

magnus chase is also greyromantic and demisexual, bi oriented

ok im done

#pjo #percy jackson and the olympians #hoo #heroes of olympus #pjo headcanons #hoo headcanons #any and all aphobes will meet a swift end #oh and percy is totally bi btw like fucking LOOK at him #og post //#*rubs my little aromantic gremlin hands all over your faves*

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flyinggoldenkitties · 2 years

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adding a song to my d&d character playlists like "ah yes, this is blorbo from my brain"

#dnd #d&d #niche terrible jokes courtesy of your friendly neighborhood dice gremlin #i created my own problematic fave

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bhaalsdeepbat · 2 months

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kicking and screaming because i have to do hair and makeup twice in a row and why is beauty such SUFFERING

#bat rambles #my look went over super well last night tho and tonight i'm tip kittening #so i gotta look cute #my curls haven't all fell out at least so should be easy to fix #my ass sitting there for 45 mins yesterday curling with the tiniest iron for the perfect bounce #it's so funny bc i'll go to performances and look SO done up and put together but #day to day i'm a fucking gremlin #my tag line is that i'm your local cryptid and ur fave shapeshifting nightmare lmao #the girlies who do full beats and hair every day are stronger than any us marine

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breeyn · 6 months

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An essay rebutting the “bad writing” claims of s2 ofmd. Spoilers herein.

I’ll preface this with saying you’re obviously allowed to like and dislike whatever you want. I am in no way opposing that. And your reasons are your reasons. Have at. (Also - this is a collection of observations from the past few days, I’m not calling anyone out)

I AM going to rebut the idea that season two was poorly written and lost the spirit of what the show is about.

My favourite movie of all time is Empire Strikes Back. It’s been my favourite movie since I was four. I’m pretty sure it’s a fave of David Jenkins, too. He and Taika have made absolutely no attempt to hide their love of all things 80’s - Prince, the Princess Bride, Kate Bush, Star Wars, etc.

I have ancient video tapes (that I can’t play because who has a vcr) where Lucas is interviewed by Leonard Maltin? Malkin? I dunno. Who cares. Maltin asks him about the Star Wars (original trilogy) story arc. Lucas says “in act I, you introduce all the characters. In act II, you put them in a situation they can’t get out of, and in act III, they get out of it.”

That’s how it works. This is how stories and literary structures work.

Of course you’re not satisfied with season two. You’re not supposed to be.

The arguments I have read on why s2 loses the spirit of s1 is because no one heals. No one learns anything. No one moves forward properly. The person who makes the biggest move towards healing dies. The two main characters end the show doing the exact fucking thing they had promised themselves and each other they wouldn’t do. Our romantic lead still doesn’t understand his value or make any headway on addressing his tragic flaw. It makes no goddamn sense.

My gremlins in weird: it’s not supposed to. In Act 2, EVERYONE LOSES. This is how it goes.

I’ve read a lot of people saying “but this felt like a series finale, not a season finale.” We all know that outside politics play a part here, the strikes make everything precarious. I remember the last writers strike. It destroyed tv for fifteen years. Anyone remember Pushing Daisies? Some of y’all have never had your fave show cancelled with zero resolution for the characters and it shows.

Daddy J did us a kindness. He softened the blow of a tough season. After the brutal cliffhanger of s1, he gave us a little softness and hope. All those things you’re mad aren’t resolved? It’s because THE STORY ISN’T OVER.

No one on earth thinks “stuff all your trauma into a box and ignore it” is good advice. A way to actually live. This show did not have enough screen time to throw out dialogue for no reason. There was foreshadowing in s1 for s2, and there is foreshadowing for s3 in s2. This is a well-crafted story by very smart people who care very much for these characters. There is zero chance Frenchie explained the box in his head for no reason. The reason people have not resolved their trauma and growth is because they haven’t done it *yet*.

And friends - it’s not thinly veiled. They straight up fucking tell us what they’re doing.

Luke Skywalker spends the first two movies fucking up and desperately trying to prove himself and just generally being an idiot. Sound familiar? He ignores the lessons he is supposed to be learning to go off and do what he feels like doing, and loses fucking badly. At the end of Empire, Han is gone, Luke and Leia wave goodbye to the Falcon that has Lando and Chewy - the rest of their crew - aboard. Everyone has lost everything they care about. Vader is undefeated. Yoda is pissed. Nothing is resolved.

You see where I’m going?

If you think I’m stretching this too far, welp, when Ed tells Stede he loves him - the climax of the finale - Stede quotes Han fucking Solo. Like - *it’s right there*. The story structure. The reason everything is unresolved.

So yeah. They wave goodbye to their ship because they have wounds to heal (like Luke’s hand). The people aboard the ship have things to find. Ed and Stede have *not* learned their lesson about whims and how not to be like Anne and Mary. It’s not stupid that they’re doing the same thing, and it’s not pointless that we were shown Anne and Mary. It’s all relevant.

The resolution comes in Act 3. None of these people are done. The story is far, far from over. And just in case the studios want to be dicks about it, David Jenkins was lovely enough to not repeat my enduring heartbreak over Pushing Daisies.

Thank you, @davidjenks 🖤

#ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd spoilers

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a-local-idiots-shitpost · 11 months

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Levi: ARGH!!!

Mammon: what are we betting on is the problem now?

Asmo: 5 Grimm on an update getting delayed for an hour

Satan: 10 Grimm on he didn't get his fave out of the gacha

Levi: (running into the room) I just saw a naked Mc!

Mammon: (shocked) what?

Asmo: like they undressed in front of you or did you run into them in the bathroom

Levi: what does that matter!?

Asmo: big difference in context

Levi: it was an accident

Lucifer: what are you guys screaming for

Mammon: (jealous) he saw a naked Mc!

Asmo: what's even the big deal?

Satan: agreed, it isn't as rare as you think

Lucifer: (shocked) what?

Mammon: what do ya mean "not as rare as you think"!?

Asmo: I take regular bathes with them, without swimsuits of course♡

Satan: they saw all of us naked anyway what's the deal with seeing them naked?

Mammon: they what!? When!?

Mc: (hiding behind him) you always sleep naked and kick your blanket of and becausw I'm always tasked with waking you up, so honestly it was a matter of time

Mammon: (jumping up) surprise gremlin!

Mc: (pouting) rude

Lucifer: Mc who else saw you naked?

Mc: Belphie becausw he always clings onto me and Beel because I go running with him and the showers were blocked once where we had to share one

Lucifer: do we have to learn about anybody else?

Mc: (shrugging) I don't know I did lose my swimwear when we were swimming once, idk if someone saw me

Diavolo: (appearing out of nowhere) oh I did actually see that

Levi: what kind of Anime plot are we going through!?

Mc: why? I thought I was pretty much hidden

Diavolo: I was curious about where Barbatos was looking all the time, he did seem awfully distracted

Mc: add Diavolo and Barbatos to the list

Lucifer: (holding his face) how do you manage all of that?

Mc: no idea

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me shitpost #obey me!#obey me crack #obey me mc #obey me lucifer #lucifer avatar of pride #obey me mammon #mammon avatar of greed #leviathan avatar of envy #obey me leviathan #satan avatar of wrath #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #asmodeus avatar of lust #obey me diavolo

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lxvvie · 5 months

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On today's episode of Simps-R-Us: A Guy and his... pet(s), or You, Your Faves, and your fur/feathered/fin-babies:

Capt. John Price - Standing ten toes down on this: Price would have two small, cute dogs, one named Sir Peabody and the other named Lady Marie. You two spoil them something fierce and they have a pile of little doggy hats that match their beloved papa's... much to his chagrin.

Gaz - Gaz said he'd surprise you and surprise you he did. He came home with a cockatoo. A damn cockatoo. Jokes on him, though, because your bird baby absolutely loves to prank the shit out of Gaz, too, by mimicking your voice when you're away and making him jump. Jokes on both of you now, because Soap has taught him how to curse and that's all he does now, Scottish accent and all. You have a picture saved of the bird (named Buttercup) on top of Gaz's head.

Alex Keller - Has the most gremlin Donskoy (named Brunswick) to ever gremlin, complete with the wide stormy eyes, which is funny because Keller can sometimes make a face that's very much gremlin-esque and the two greatly resemble each other. Can usually be found making biscuits on Alex's head.

Soap - Has a Labrador named Whiskey that he absolutely adores. Whiskey has also put you two in the most adorable of love triangles where you don't know whose affection you're playfully fighting for on any given day. Also has a tendency to take Soap's socks and he has to chase him throughout the house. Well, he and Whiskey are chasing each other throughout the house just about constantly.

Ghost - You guys talked about it but he surprised you one day by bringing home a Belgian Mal puppers who didn't make the unit. His name? Pup. Pup Riley. And Pup Riley is a ball of energy. Bloody hell. He always assumes he's going for a walk whenever you two make ready to leave. He also won't let Simon leave without him and so Simon usually has to create a diversion just to walk out the front door. It's also not uncommon for Pup to jump on his Papa whenever he gets home, too. Oh, did we also talk about the fact that Simon has to fight with Pup for his side of the bed whenever he's home or that Pup wakes him up early in the damn morning to take him out for his first walk of the day?

Roach - Found a stray kitten and brought her home. Her name's Oatmeal. Oatmeal is now the chonkiest, cutest loaf (you send Roach various pictures of her Loafiness). You two also bought her a set of those pet buttons just for shits and giggles and Oatmeal's really caught on to them. She uses "Dad", "Mad", and "Food" a lot even though she stays fed lmao.

Keegan - To everyone's surprise (and his own), has a husky named Balto who ignores the concept of personal space, loves to put his paw right in the middle of Keegan's face, and has pissed on Keegan's boots more than once because Balto felt slighted (you had to go to the groomer's, buddy, you rolled in mud). You and Keegan have also lost count of the number of times you've had to carry Balto into the house because he refuses to come inside, especially when it’s cold.

Alejandro - You two adopted a senior dog named Mojo who is the most peaceful little angel. Can usually be found lying near yours or Alejo's feet as you're working or something of that nature.

Rudy - You two have this huge ass tank full of fish that run the gamut of the rainbow and you remember all their names. The brooding one is named Alejandro and his namesake was not amused lmao.

König - You two have a small but floofy cat. She's black with a grey undercoat that he calls his "little Prinzessin" and she always looks like she's in a constant state of surprise. Whenever she blinks or closes her eyes, she becomes a floofy void. Her Highness prefers to be carried like a baby, thank you very much.

Phillip Graves - You two are the proud parents of a Bulldog named Bubba who thinks he has his humans trained (spoiler alert: he kinda does). Bubba Graves makes your day with the way he silently judges his parents, throws a tantrum when he doesn't get more food or pets, and usually has Philip sigh facetiously and go, "Now, son, why can't you behave for your old man, huh?"

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vtoriacore · 1 year

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Yo! It's me! I was wondering if I could request Ruggie, Idia, Riddle, and Malleus with a significant other who fights people for just breathing in their direction. Like Crowley opens his mouth and their already like "SHUT UP!" And throws chairs at people. I think the comedic potential for this is exponential

✧ alla stocatta (this chair)!

note: this is such a funny fucking concept LMFAO😭 gremlin MC agenda has gotta be my fucking fave they have the power to be so unhinged and i live for it also not proofread because it's low-key 12 am BUT. it's readable so-

characters: ruggie, idia, riddle, malleus

people who reblogged here is a special heart and a kith y'all do the most and ily 💞

♡ RUGGIE

ruggie finds it both amusing and kind of intimidating (and kinda hot but he'll die before he admits this yk) how you literally defend his honour (even when it doesn't necessarily need to be defended) but is he complaining? fuck no!

half the time he is laughing and the other half is him cheering you on and maybe even encouraging you to do something just a little overboard (nothing that will get you into trouble, and if it does he's usually happy to take the blame)

the first time he witnessed you literally throwing your broom at leona in joint flight class because he wouldn't stop bitching to ruggie was just about the most hilarious fucking thing he's ever seen and oh- there he goes falling off because he couldn't stop laughing (he stops when you catch him and ask if he's okay though - this mf may think he's slick but is literally reduced to a blubbering mess once he finds himself in a position considered a little too intimate with you)

the second time he saw you trip someone up because they looked at him wrong, and your silly, sly self simply gave them the most unimpressed look you could muster with a "watch where you're going"

the hyena was too stunned to speak 😮 no but seriously he found that both hilarious (as always) and admirable because holy shit, you did it so nonchalantly and it looked so fucking cool- he questions how he was even able to pull you (dw ruggie, you've got rizz!)

he absolutely loves when you stand up for him for more serious stuff though, like if someone's insulting him for his status or for having to work etc. because your no-bullshit attitude actually works so well? you just casually throw a chair at the mf even daring to look at him and his heart goes ✨✨✨ all the while he's laughing and cheering you on from the sidelines.

♡ IDIA

at first, idia is fucking terrified! bro is borderline crashing because how the fuck did you have the strength to haul that heavy ass cauldron at the person making a snide remark about him? he was going to say he's NEVER coming to class again but after this, he changes his mind so quick

like, you looked so badass doing that? the savannaclaw loser who tried insulting him barely got two words out and you just- oh wow! he just got the "in love" status applied to him again!

nah but fr he is literally fucking grinning as he stares at the poor, poor fool laying on the ground and is so fucking smug about it too!

"that was an ez no scope, didn't even have to be 360 lol'

"idia ily but what"

"it's a roundabout way of saying this bozo stood no chance, you pulled up on him too quick lmao"

at first, he is a bit concerned that you might end up in trouble with someone for doing all this but . . . yk, his money speaks for itself and if something does ever happen covering up wouldn't be too hard so he lets you do as you please

this hades-rapunzel secret love child thinks its low-key hot too, but he'll never admit it and he literally turns bright fucking pink anytime he even thinks this. you tried prying the answer out before, but he pulled out his secret trump card - fainting on you so he wouldn't have to say a thing

idia is another mf to absolutely egg you on as you cause some more chaos, it's getting to the point ortho had to warn you of nearly breaking someone's arm before you stopped. idia was just standing there, the most villainous, evil grin to have ever graced his face; "no, no! let them cook!"

♡ RIDDLE

riddle. fucking. FAINTS!

he was NOT ready for that strawberry tart to end up lodged down someone's throat as you victoriously shrugged your shoulders with a "what? they had it coming."

"oh great heavens what have you- where is the decorum? what could have possibly compelled you to-" aaaaaaaand man's down!

when he awakes, he's frantically shaking your shoulders and asking why you would even think that nearly suffocating someone (not really, you pushed the tart far enough they could swallow) was appropriate

but let me tell you, when he hears it was because they've insulted him and brought his mother into it, he low-key feels light headed and oh wow his cheeks are getting pretty warm huh?

riddle, in his own spiteful way, actually doesn't probe you on this any longer and makes you promise that you won't do this in his vicinity again

you of course, nod along. you won't do it in his vicinity, but will be perfectly fine exacting your revenge straight after he's out of sight

when you actually end up having a . . . a chair duel. yes, he read that right. (he wasn't about to even question how that came about but nontheless) he ends up both impressed at you exploiting a loophole you've found within his statement and at the fact the person you've just beaten (both literally and figuratively) is miserably sitting on the floor apologising for giving riddle the wrong look at 12:34 AM on the 3rd of march. very specific

riddle doesn't even chastise you for this one, he is exasperated but does actually pull you away from the scene and thanks you for defending him. this time, he makes you promise to resolve your fights for him verbally, but he won't be stopping you from this point on (it's because he doesn't want to and enjoys you standing up for him)

♡ MALLEUS

the student walking away from malleus makes him feel a bit bad. so naturally, to remedy this, you end up shouting at them! now they're backing away from you instead, isn't this the meaning of true love? (no)

this silly little very capable of looking after himself fae is fucking over the moon! absolutely smitten! completely in love! when you come to defend him and angrily shout at people for not treating him like a being worthy of respect and love.

he low-key debates proposing to you on the spot after you also somehow manage to get a student to apologize to him for fearing him for no good reason! he appreciates the sentiment and you caring for his well being, isn't that basically marriage already? no? he'd like to digress immediately

malleus does get a bit concerned when things get physical, not that he doesn't trust you to take care of yourself or anything but he worries that you might end up hurt. oh, did you think he'd care for the person you're fighting? or you getting in trouble? nah, he could literally BBQ anyone who even dared harm you anyway and if crowley even thought to step in, he'd soon be reconsidering because he doesn't want to end up an elaborate crow dish

however, on the occasion that you do outsmart your opponent (aka the savannaclaw student who just rolled his eyes at the dragon fae) he feels hella proud and is very amused at your antics. i mean, the way you just psychologically destroyed the fool in front of you for their comment on malleus not even being that good at magift is very sure to leave them questioning why they even bothered coming out the womb for the rest of their life.

he is another one that finds it low-key 😳😳😳 like damn, did you always look this badass when flipping someone off for even breathing wrong near him? sane thoughts just weren't made for malleus

#twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #twst crack #twst #twisted wonderland #ruggie bucchi x reader #riddle rosehearts x reader #idia shroud x reader #malleus draconia x reader #ruggie bucchi #riddle rosehearts #idia shroud #malleus draconia #twst malleus #twst ruggie #twst riddle #twst idia

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dancingbirdie · 5 months

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Honestly I just wanted to write something Astarion x Halsin x Reader related, and this is what my brain told my fingers to tap onto the keyboard. It's sugar sweet with like one speck of chili pepper flake. Idk how to feel about it - it's not my fave I've ever written, but I also like how cutsey it is? Idk.

Feathers, Flirts, and Fiends

Rating: Teen

Pairing: Astarion x Halsin x gn!Reader

Word Count: 800

Tags: Fluff with a dash of spice at the end, humor, throuple domestic bliss, polyamory cuteness

Summary: For Astarion, it can be very taxing when your two lovers also happen to both be druids.

*****

In his dream, the bed was so disheveled that down feathers whooshed up in riotous little eddies each time he moved his limbs. Snow white, soft as petals, landing carelessly this way and that. He could feel the heat from his two lovers on either side of him, although the bed was too expansive to reach for them.

They must have shared a rather rowdy evening together, given the abundance of freewheeling feathers that surrounded him. He couldn’t recall the details now. Curious. His eyelids slipped shut as a tuft floated down to land on his lashes. Another caressed his cheek. He smiled, content.

But then the third arrival was less welcoming, landing just under his nose. He lifted a hand up to knock it aside, only for the feather to be replaced by another. Brows furrowed, he batted it away with a tinge more annoyance. But that one was only replaced once again.

The barrage of feathers was beginning to tickle. He could feel a sneeze itching its way to the front of his nose. As his body instinctively inhaled to let it loose, he woke with a start.

Well, the dream had gotten one thing right, Astarion thought to himself.

There were indeed feathers surrounding him everywhere. It was all he could see as he peered about with bleary eyes. But they weren’t the soft down of a priceless plush pillow or mattress, no.

They were attached to the pelts of his two lovers, you and Halsin, having shifted sometime in the night into your owlbear forms. Sandwiched between you, he felt the feathers rise and fall, sweeping up and down across his body, in time with your deep, drawn out breaths.

“Gods damn you blasted druids,” he griped, shoving against you and the Archdruid in an effort to rouse your overlarge forms. “Wake up and shift back! Lest I succumb to death by feather asphyxiation.”

You’d awoken the moment Astarion had startled beside you, but the trickster in you considered feigning sleep just to see how long he would grouse. He could be so dramatic at times. It was darling.

But Halsin was a kinder soul than you. You sensed him shift immediately in response to Astarion’s huffy command. Heard him murmur a sincere apology.

“I know you’re awake, you beastie” Astarion hissed into the feathers covering your ear hole. “Your breathing’s picked up.”

Blast. There goes any fun.

Blinking open your enlarged eyes, you rolled them in a show of exasperation as you pulled on the tether of your magic to relinquish your wild shape. You quickly downsized to your normal elven form, curled in the same way your owlbear self had been sleeping.

“Don’t be such a gremlin, Astarion,” you yawned, scooting closer to embrace him and Halsin, who had banded an arm across the vampire’s waist and was reaching for you to join them. “I would have thought you’d rather enjoy the warmth of two owlbear companions.”

“Oh yes, being smothered by lichen-and-moss-smelling feathers has always been a fantasy of mine,” he retorted.

“Can vampires actually be smothered? I thought it was just wooden stakes and sunlight that did you in,” you smirked deviously.

“You’re awful,” Astarion pouted, turning his head to rest in the crook of Halsin’s shoulder and neck. “At least Halsin showed an ounce of contrition.”

You heard the archdruid’s gravelly laugh as he kissed the top of Astarion’s head. “I’ve learned it goes a ways farther than verbally sparring with you,” he murmured into his silvery curls.

“Quite right,” Astarion sniffed. “Much farther indeed, darling.”

Laughter bubbled forth from your own lips as you squeezed closer into his side and snaked an arm across his chest.

“But where’s the fun in that?” you whispered. “Our verbal sparring often leads us three into some very interesting circumstances.”

At those words, Halsin reflexively clutched your waist harder. Astarion tensed before pushing back into your chest suggestively. You grinned fiendishly to yourself. Getting these two hot and bothered had become a specialty of yours lately. And you loved it.

“Tsk. You’re incorrigible,” Astarion grumbled, although his words were a bit breathier than they had been.

“Careful, lest you start something again,” Halsin warned. You couldn’t see him past Astarion’s head, but you could tell he was smiling just by his tone. “I’m not opposed to losing rest in order to see how this tête-à-tête ensues.”

You chuckled darkly. “Noted. What say you, Astarion? Care to keep sparring?” The insinuation in your tone was clear.

“Darling, you forget,” he murmured, one hand slipping down, behind him, to tug at the lacings of your breeches. His voice was muffled. You watched hungrily as he began to trail hot, open-mouthed kisses across the column of Halsin throat.

“I’m always ready for a spar with you two.”

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miaunifest · 1 year

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könig headcanons ^_^

baking ver.

a/n: i am going to knead him like bread dough and gently place him in an oven . anyways silly könig in full force here !!! these r short bc work took up all my brain power ❤️

if there’s one thing this mountain man loves, it’s spending time with you

könig has a HUGE sweet tooth (which he controls .. most of the time), so when you asked if he wanted to learn how to bake one of your fave treats? he teleported to the kitchen ong

he pays really close attention to how you make it !!

makes note of exact measurements & when you’re just eyeballing it

(which is a majority of the time)

if there’s a portion that involves using your hands you take the opportunity to guide könig yourself

he melts so fast .

but he is like terrified he’s gonna mess it up

you reassure him he won’t, and even if he does it’s okay

it took you an embarrassingly long time to nail this specific recipe

so when your bf who was literally just stressing about if he overmixed it or not gets it down faster than you did?

your ego was a little (very) bruised

while he’s not looking you take cream/frosting and put it on his face

he thought it was gonna be wholesome & domestic quality time

until your gremlin ass ruined it

your hands are resting on the counter, ready to push off and make a run for it

until he goes back to what he was doing

then youre like ??? wtf man

so you go back over to him, helping

not even 5 minutes later you feel something on your cheek

you got gotted.

next thing you know you’re chasing e/o around, smothering e/o w the shit you actually need to successfully bake

you enjoy silly moments like these with your silly little bf. seeing him let loose and be all giggly with you :,)

before you have time to make your next attack you find yourself in a bear hug

you & könig are just being happy n giddy, holding you as you very poorly try to wiggle your way out

you turn around to face the babygirl himself

and he has a sickeningly sweet smile on his face

it is taking everything in you to not smother him half to death with love

(cuteness aggression much?)

you bring him down to your level to cover all the frosted parts of his face in kisses

he stands there & accepts his fate, giggling n blushing n shit

your kitchen is a mess & you’re pretty sure the dessert is burnt by now

but nothing matters in that moment besides the shared looks & pecks between you and your austrian hunk of a man

#könig mw2 #könig cod #könig x reader #konig x reader #könig call of duty #könig headcanons #I LOVE SILLY KÖNIG SO BAD #HE DESERVES TO BE HAPPY HELLAUR #cod x reader #call of duty x reader #miaunifest #I WANNA EAT HIM

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wannaeatramyeon · 11 months

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Hey!!! Can i plss request lookism men with a short and petite fem reader...like 5'1 And she is quite thin. If you're uncomfortable then plss feel free to ignore it 😅. Thank you ❤️🙏

Hey anon! Thanks for the ask and sorry for the delay! A few headcanons for you below. I've mostly focused on the guys that I think would react/care about it :) What a coincidence it is mostly consisting of my faves!!

Lookism Boys with Petite S/O

Johan, Vin, Jake, Samuel, Goo

Johan Seong

If Johan could roll you up and tuck you into his pocket, he would. He seems to have a habit of collecting small creatures: Eden, Miro, You (no offence), so what's one more in the pack to protect. Main goal to keep you feeling safe and secure at all times, which is easy to achieve being with Johan.

From a practical standpoint, actually enjoys your small stature cos that's fewer calories to maintain right? A little less to worry about with food.

Vin Jin

Look. You know what Vin is like. He makes fun of your height every chance he gets. Dangles your stuff just out of reach, making you jump and swipe like an idiot child as he laughs. Truly, the height of comedy. Not.

And yeah, all the mentions of literal 'shorty' in his rap makes you cringe like hell.

Jake Kim

Equal parts teasing and protective. "Oh poor Y/N, can''t reach up that shelf." "Babe, are you strong enough to open that can of soda?". But those jokes are reserved for Jake only. Any words from anyone else would be rewarded with a sharp look and a frown.

Expect him resting his elbows on your head, ruffling your hair and sweet forehead kisses.

Samuel Seo

Similar to Jake (though don't tell him that unless you want to die), your height and size does flare up his protective instinct. And being the silly insecure bastard he is, the height difference means he's also able to somewhat lord over you, which he loves.

The only annoyance is when he's in one of his moods, he tends to treat you like an errant child. Hand on your head, holding you back as he scrolls on his phone or whatever.

Goo Kim

You think he wouldn't just pick you up and carry you in his arms, without warning? Fireman-carry over his shoulders like a sack of unruly potatoes? One of the perks of a petite S/O is how easy you are to shift and he will take absolute full advantage.

The nicknames would also be endless. Shortcake, gremlin, ankle biter. All said with affection, of course.

Side note for these guys + Gun Park: Likely to have discovered a size difference kink with you.

#lookism #lookism webtoon #lookism manhwa #lookism x reader #lookism headcanons #lookism hc #johan seong #johan seong x reader #vin jin #vin jin x reader #jake kim #jake kim x reader #samuel seo #samuel seo x reader #goo kim #goo kim x reader #wannaeatramyeon

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dc418writes · 6 months

Text

✨Pairing✨: trucker!Ari Levinsonxblack!reader

Summary🪄: It’s always a time when uncle Ari comes around

⚠️: uncle!Ari (just as damaging as dad!Ari and regular Ari lol) mention of nightmares, pretty much all fluff💕

A/N🎤: Hey guys! Another Halloween themed fic but this time with a softer Ari😌. This will serve as atonement to myself (and others who might be affected) for daring to make my fave dark in my last post lol. Hope you guys like it!!

*DISCLAIMER!: although visual made by me via Canva, I DO NOT CLAIM OWNERSHIP of pics used as they were all found on Pinterest*

As expected, four year old Grace had been attached to Ari since the moment you both arrived to babysit for the night. You wouldn’t say you were upset seeing that he was her uncle and that they’ve talked nearly every day since she could babble, but there was still a little sting every time you were greeted with a quiet “hi” or short wave before she was gone and you long forgotten.

Like now as they dug through their shared pumpkin emptying it’s stringy contents while you were in charge of decorating the sugar cookies waiting on the cooling rack.

“S’cold!,” she squealed dumping out her handful of pumpkin guts.

“Be careful of the seeds, you swallow one and a huge pumpkin’s gonna grow in your belly,” Ari warned to which little Grace quickly shook her head.

“Nuh-uh!”

“Uh-huh!”

“No uncle Ari, we can eat. See?” Before either of you can say anything, she’s quick to set one on her tongue happily chewing until she can swallow it down rubbing her belly. “I’m fine.”

“I guess you showed me huh,” he chuckles tapping her nose and leaving some juice from his finger on her skin successfully turning it light orange. Grace is quick to retaliate though rubbing her hands on his cheeks to leave behind tiny pieces of string as she giggles - and you do too from the other side of the kitchen.

Honestly you couldn’t blame her for picking Ari over you as her favorite. You’d choose him too if you had to pick between the two of you.

“Alright, it’s pretty much cleaned out now. You want scary or funny?,” he asks watching as she adorably tapped her tiny finger to her temple in thought.

“Hmm…funny!”

“Got it,” he nods. “Why don’t you get cleaned up and help your aunt with cookies?”

“I got everything we could ever want Grace,” you smile reaching in your grocery bag full of decorating goodies. “There’s sprinkles - three different shapes I might add - glitter, edible stickers, and stencils to help us draw shapes!”

The way she gazed at the sprinkles with her mouth in a little “o”, you think you’ve got her. Finally able to bond with her over a shared love of cookies like you were in one of those Hallmark movies. Like a little happy family.

“Um..wanna stay with uncle Ari.”

Well, so much for that.

“Oh okay,” you answer successfully hiding your hurt behind your nonchalance. Ari still notices though giving you a sympathetic smile and mouthing, “sorry.”

You appreciated him trying, but maybe you were just meant to be the fun uncle’s wife that barely got a hello. And who tends to go overboard with cookie decorating supplies.

•

“Alright ladies are we ready?,” Ari asks sitting on the navy blue sectional between you and a bouncy Grace nodding yes. During your spaghetti dinner - made by Ari since apparently his was the best although he used your recipe - he suggested that you all watch a movie afterwards.

Specifically, Gremlins.

His thought process being what better way for everyone - more so you and Grace - to spend time together than to watch a movie? Especially a spooky one seeing that it was the night before Halloween. You, on the other hand, had a few concerns on his niece potentially being scared of the little troublesome creatures.

“She’ll be fine. It’s not that scary,” he assured kissing your cheek.

Freshly bathed and in her appropriately themed pumpkin pajamas, Grace couldn’t wait holding on tight to her Mickey Mouse blanket as she watched her uncle press play.

“Share with me!,” she smiles just as Ari spreads the bigger, cream blanket over both yours and his lap.

“I’m not gonna fit though bug.”

“Uh huh! Watch,” she states crawling into his lap and neatly spreading the grey blanket over her legs and his thighs. You - again - casted off to the side with your blanket as she tilts her head back to look up at him. “We fit!”

“Y-Yea, looks like we do.” He gives you another sympathetic smile draping his arm around your shoulders while you bundle deeper under the blanket.

“I’d rather be by myself anyway. Little does she know her uncle is a blanket hog,” you think trying to make yourself feel better.

•

Ari appeared to be right on Grace not being scared. She even fell asleep towards the end with her upper half on the cushion next to them and lower half still on his lap; mouth wide open pointed towards the ceiling. Ari was the one to tuck her in bed, while you cleaned up the blankets and plates of cookie crumbs left in the living room.

You were the last to enter the shared guest room to finally get ready for bed yourself. Your love struck husband taking turns gazing at you and the last period of some hockey game as you strode back and forth from the bathroom to the bedroom. A small, dopey smile on his lips watching you wash your face and apply all your products.

“Share with me?,” he pouts with those puppy eyes making you giggle while sliding into the full sized bed.

“I don’t know,” you sigh, “I feel like Grace is gonna somehow come in saying how she wants you to sleep in her room instead because that’s where you’re supposed to be.”

Yes probably a little petty, but you couldn’t hold it in anymore.

His tattooed arms bring you closer into his body pecking the top of your head as you settle between his pecs. A low “aw” vibrating in his chest while his hands rub along your back.

“I know I probably sound jealous, but I’m not. I love how you have a great relationship with your niece! But it’s like she hates me and I have no idea what I did.”

He knew that had always been a bit of a fear for you. Kids hating you for whatever reason, thus meaning you shouldn’t have them although you did desire to be a mother one day. It’s why you were nervous meeting Grace all those years ago, afraid that the smallest mess up would ruin everything.

It didn’t help that the minute Ari passed her to you, she began whining and squirming. Your coos of comfort and gentle rocks didn’t seem to help, only making her more agitated not getting what she wanted. She didn’t stop until she was back in Ari’s strong arms and you kept your distance the rest of the visit cautious of a repeat interaction.

If only he could get you to ignore that fear and really see how everyone you met - adults and children alike - had no issues with you. Some even left enchanted by the charisma you thought you lacked.

“I promise, she doesn’t hate you gorgeous.”

“She said so?,” you quietly ask lifting your head with a hint of hope.

“Well…no. But she didn’t say the opposite either.” He tried to soothe your qualms, but it’s not helping the way he hoped watching your head fall back to his chest with a light huff. “Trust me sweetheart. I guess she’s just attached to me because-,”

“You’re amazing and clearly the favorite,” you mumble making him chuckle.

“I was gonna say because I talk to her more, but I’ll take the compliment.”

It’s not long after that you’re both falling asleep lulled by the shared warmth from holding each other. Ari’s soft snores vibrating the side of your face still lying on his chest.

You think you’re dreaming when a mix of a whine and cry hits your ears disrupting your rest and making you groggily sit up. Hearing feet shuffling outside your door though confirms those sounds are in fact real, giving you more motivation to investigate.

Your husband’s too far gone in his own dreamland to be affected by your moving; still lightly snoring with an arm over his forehead and the other out by his side.

Quietly opening the door, you wrap your arms around yourself in your thin pajama set feeling the chill of the night air seeping into your sister in law’s house before carefully padding out to the living room. There, you notice something on the couch moving under the blanket you folded earlier causing you to freeze in place. It was then you realized you probably should’ve woken Ari up so he could be the one playing detective or at least grabbed something you could use to defend yourself.

“H-Hello?,” you call out to the dim space only lit by a couple plug in nightlights in the walls.

“Hi,” Grace’s soft voice responds with a short sniffle.

You also realize how you’re sleepy brain might not be fully thinking straight unable to conclude earlier how it could just be your own niece sitting there on the couch.

Stepping closer, you sit on the cushion next to hers peeling back the cotton throw until you see her splotchy face and red eyes. Water attached to her curled lashes and some still threatening to spill over. “What’s wrong?”

“Bad dream…gwemlins,” she answers using the blanket to wipe her eyes. You immediately hug her close as you coo and assure her everything’s okay.

And surprisingly, she hugs you back.

Her tiny arms wrap tight around you - well, as far as they could with her adorably short reach - almost refusing to let you go.

“Yea, when they get angry they can be scary huh?”

She nods. “And have very very sharp teeth.”

“They do, but luckily they’re not real so there’s nothing-,”

A crash from the back room startles both of you making Grace scream, with the six year old nearly choking you now having her arms around your neck.

“It’s them!,” she cries hiding her face in your shoulder just as Ari limps into the living room holding his knee and appearing half asleep.

“Damn dresser,” he grumbles wiping his eyes that quickly fill with concern seeing both of you on the couch and his niece upset. “What’s wrong?”

“Grace had a nightmare about Gremlins,” you answer pointedly glaring at him as if saying, “I told you so!”

The slight wince on his face isn’t just from an uncomfortable knee as he walks forward to perch on the coffee table. “I’m sorry bug. I didn’t mean to show that to you to scare you.”

“Not nice uncle Ari,” she mumbles still attached to you.

“Forgive me?,” he pouts holding his arms out for a hug. “Peas?”

Wiping her eyes one last time, a small smile begins to spread on her lips as she moves from you to Ari. A fit of giggles rapidly escaping her mouth as his larger body practically swallows hers in a bear hug and he attacks her cheeks with kisses. A dramatic “mwah” sounding every time he made contact causing you to giggle as well.

And fantasize the undoubtedly joyful future you’d both have with your own children.

“Don’t do it again!,” she chastises when he stops. Wagging her finger inches from his nose making him chuckle. She was definitely her mother’s child.

“I promise I won’t.”

“Alright guys,” you sigh, “Since it’s gonna be a bit difficult to go back to sleep, I say we watch something happy.”

“Not Gwemlins!”

“No definitely not,” you chuckle. “I was thinking..Aladdin.”

“Yay! I love Aladdin!,” she claps in Ari’s arms as he picks her up so they both can sit on the couch. To both of your surprise, Grace crawls from her uncle’s lap and squeezes between you and Ari. “You like too?”

“Mhm, I even went as Princess Jasmine for Halloween when I was little.” You have to admit, seeing that gleam of admiration in her eyes as she gazed up at you made you silently thank Ari for showing her that movie. It was the reason behind this bonding moment that you didn’t think would happen.

As the movie played, you and Grace talked about the scenes and of course sung along to your heart’s content not caring if you were off key. All the while Ari watched you both with a soft smile on his pink lips loving how fast of friends you’d become.

And when you both fell asleep - you leaning on his shoulder and her across your lap - he couldn’t help but sneakily take a picture with his phone. Sending it to you with a message saying “looks like you’re amazing and a clear favorite too😉”.

#ari levinson #ari levinson x black!reader #ari levinson x reader #ari levinson x woc #ari levinson au #red sea diving resort #chris evans #chris evans x black reader #chris evans x reader #chris evans x woc!reader

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