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theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin · 3 years

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Hi! I’m a big fan of your work!! I am looking for more but unfortunately I feel like I have read all yhe good Harry Potter docs on Ao3. Do you have any recs?

Sorry for the delay, I just know that whenever I make rec list it usually ends up taking a while.

With that, Harry Potter fics are a big genre. Just saying Harry Potter in general really isn’t that specific to me so this is across genres/character focuses/you name it.

Also, as usual, I’ve been on fanfiction longer and have amassed more favorites there. Some of these are cross posted to Ao3. Similarly, a lot are unfinished, this personally doesn’t bother me but if it bothers you take heed.

Also, you’ll see my embarrassing obsession with Tom Riddle. So, heads up for that.

Stepbrother (Tom Riddle/Hermione Granger, period piece, in which the two remind me a lot of Nabokov)

Cat Among the Pigeons (Tom Riddle/Lily Evans, Psycho-Pass Detective AU, in which I am a beta actually so my promoting this goes without saying)

Til Death Do Us Part (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Voldemort wins AU, which for me does very well with the concept of immortality and what exactly Tom is supposed to do after he wins)

This Tangle of Thorns (Tom Riddle/Hermione Granger, modern AH AU, a full on Nabokov inspired fic which I enjoy because Lolita)

Delusional (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, sort of. Harry wins the war, goes crazy, checks into a mental hospital. Or he’s not crazy and Voldemort is as unkillable as Palpatine.)

Harry Potter and the Natural 20 (OC insert, D&D inspired, shameless crack. I mostly enjoy the beginning of this but it makes me laugh enough to recommend.)

A Hairy Business (AU, Harry is a deer, he is literally a deer, that’s it. It’s funny.)

Animus, Anima (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Harry travels back in time, gets stuck in Tom Riddle’s brain, and it turns out Harry’s responsible for every terrible thing that ever happened. This one was squicky even for me, very well done, but strap in.)

Addendum, He is Also a Liar (Tom Riddle/Hermione Granger, Tom has an inexplicable ability to travel to the future, but only to this random little girl Hermione Granger)

Framed & Fractured (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Harry gets stuck in an evil painting back in time. Tom is creepy as usual.)

Trying for Eden (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Harry travels back in time to lecture Tom into morality. It doesn’t work.)

Magical Mirrors (Luna Lovegood and Severus Snape, Luna and Snape stumble on the Mirror of Erised at the same time and strike up a conversation)

Aphelion (Hermione Granger/Loki, MCU crossover, Hermione and Loki strike up the world’s weirdest toxic friendship when Hermione’s young and attending Hogwarts, this leads terrible places as Loki slides into madness and despair)

Wandering Souls (Luna Lovegood and The Undertaker, Black Butler crossover, Luna meets and strikes up a conversation with the Undertaker)

Of Lies Most Beautiful (Tom Riddle, Hunger Games crossover, Tom wins the Hunger Games becaues that’s what he does bitch)

In Wonderland (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Harry ends up back in the past and decides to raise Tom Riddle. This goes so poorly that the pair almost get eaten by eldritch gods multiple times.)

Rumpelstiltskin, Guess My Name (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Female Harry travels back in time and offers to save Merope’s life/get her Tom Riddle Sr. the non rapey way in return for her firstborn son. Merope thought Harry was joking. She wasn’t joking. In the sequel, also linked, Harry kills Morfin.)

The Eyes (Harry Potter, AU, turns out “the power he knows not” is the power humanity knows not, Harry’s ability to see eldritch abominations and cosmic gods and thus bring them far enough into our reality that they eat everything. And I mean everything.)

Mirror Mirror (Harry Potter, MCU crossover, Harry makes a huge mistake and stops Hulk in the middle of a rampage. This gets him abducted by octopus nazis.)

I See the Moon (Harry Potter and Bruce Banner, MCU crossover, Harry got brain damage from the war and wanders around the middle of nowhere. He runs into Bruce. He’s now Bruce’s only friend.)

You Will Be the Death of Me (Harry Potter and Tom Riddle, Despicable Me inspired, through a series of convoluted events Tom as the world’s worst father figure ends up raising Harry the sad adorable orphan.)

In Death, Standby (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter (sort of, the authro claims), Tom raises Harry, the only Tom raises Harry that I’ve seen done well because Tom is the world’s worst father. Harry thinks he’s a deformed snake until the age of three.)

Little Harry’s Mirkwood Adventure (Harry Potter and Dudley Dursley, Hobbit Crossover, one of the most Tolkien style crossovers I’ve actually seen and is very good)

A (Self-Imposed) Trap for a Fool (Ginny Weasley, turns out Harry Potter never existed, as in he’s a collective hallucination made up by the entire wizarding world)

McLaggen and From McLaggen with Love (McLaggen, a detective AU then a James Bond style adventure starring McLaggen, the greatest wizard who ever wizarded)

Tom Riddle’s Diary: on keeping devils in the summer (Tom Riddle, Tom Riddle’s antichrist orphan adventures involving exorcism and burning people alive)

and the fates sing (hold on, son) (Harry Potter, MCU crossover, Harry is the son of Loki and like all children of Loki he is a wretched and cursed thing)

A Faulty Master (Harry Potter and Itachi Uchiha, Naruto crossover, Itachi after the massacre of his family has a run in with a master of death Harry, who is a creepy creepy man)

Eye of Reason (Harry Potter/Jack Frost, Rise of the Guardians crossover, due to the mythos surrounding his life Harry ceases to be a man and becomes akin to a god)

Flowers for a Ghost (Luna Lovegood and Itachi Uchiha, Naruto Crossover, Luna befriends a blind ghost)

Third Time’s the Charm (Harry Potter, MCU crossover, Bruce Banner keeps trying to kill himself and MoD Harry is there to have himself a real good day)

Blind Faith (Bellatrix LeStrange/Tom Riddle, canon compliant, an in depth look at Bellatrix from the escape of Azkaban onward)

Cocktail Time (Rita Skeeter and Gilderoy Lockhart, Rita does an expose and autobiography detailing the descent of Gilderoy Lockhart and how he became what he became)

Fantastic Elves and Where to Find Them (Harry Potter, canon divergent AU, Harry thinks he’s an elf. That’s it.)

The Twine Bracelet (Colin Creevy, a look at Colin’s death)

Legal Alien (Harry Potter, MCU crossover, Harry visits New York and an alien invasion breaks out. Culminates with the best, dumb, joke.)

The Root of Desire (Tom Riddle/Hermione Granger, Hermione travels back in time and tries to influence Tom. All this does is inspire his sexual awakening.)

Deadheads (Harry Potter/Godric Gryffindor, a romantic comedy of a kind, culminating in the best dumbest joke)

Give and Take (Tom Riddle/Hermione Granger, Hermione tries to outwit Tom, it ends in despair)

The Road to Somewhere (Harry Potter, Spirited Away crossover, Harry as MoD is in the realm of the spirits)

Absolute (Harry Potter, Harry picks up a death note, he kills everyone)

Fortunate Son (Dudley Dursleys, years afterwards Dudley looks back and writes a memoir and expose about the abuse inflicted on his cousin)

Elective Affinities (Severus Snape/Harry Potter, Harry travels back in time to discover his parents are assholes and things are more complicated than he imagined)

Juxtaposed (Bod, Graveyard Book crossover, Bod attends Hogwarts)

The Fire Omens (Tom Riddle and a look at WWII)

Broken Toys (Tom Riddle and his useless broken toys)

The Fine Art of Poisoning (Madame Zabini)

A Marriage of Convenience (Pansy and Theo get married)

Reparabilis (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Tom becomes a professor, he still destroys Harry Potter)

The Unforgivable Curses (Draco Malfoy, a look at the 4th year unforgivable lecture with Moody and the Slytherins)

Ugly (Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy one sided Dudley/Harry Potter, Dudley’s fat, ugly, and creeps on his cousin)

Three Can Keep a Secret (Harry Potter, on secrets and secret keeping)

Caveat Incimici (Hermione Granger, on Hermione and her terrifying wrath)

Babylon (Harry Potter and Tom Riddle, Harry never gets rid of Tom)

Wonderful Tragic Mysterious (Luna Lovegood and Albus Dumbledore, Luna Lovegood time travels and becomes a young Albus’ neighbor)

In the Clockface, Weighted and Weary (Harry Potter/Ariana Dumbledore, Harry after DH ends up back in time in Dumbledore’s childhood and witnesses the beautiful Dumbledore family dysfunction)

Eternal Return (Harry Potter and Tom Riddle, Harry is reincarnated as Tom Riddle and as a result becomes Voldemort so that a Voldemort exists)

Like Pale Fire (Harry Potter/Godric Gryffindor, the Founders are resurrected and it turns out Harry had travelled to the past and become Salazar Slytherin, turns out the Founders were more complicated than people expected.)

12 Moves Sideways (Harry Potter and Light Yagami, Death Note crossover, Light becomes the Defense Professor, for once Harry does not figure out the mystery.)

A Very Young Girl’s Record of Her Own Impressions (Ariana Dumbledore’s diary)

Night Comes Early (Moody on war)

Little Witches (The Black family women and how it all falls apart)

Paved with Good Intentions (Petunia on finding a baby on her doorstep)

Emerald Serpent for Vanity (Draco and Nagini introspective)

Blue (Tom Riddle/Bellatrix LeStrange, Voldemort wins dystopia, Tom visits Bellatrix’s grave and is very crazy)

Eighteen (Hermione Granger, on Hermione’s betrayal of her parents)

Ouroboros (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, on what they’ve made of each other)

Not so Different (Scout, To Kill a Mockingbird Crossover, Scout reflects on the wizarding world’s raicsm)

Traitor (Hermione Granger, Hermione is captured by the Death Eaters and commits unspeakable acts to free herself)

Smashing Mirrors (Tom Riddle, introspective)

Twelve Dark Moons (Luna Lovegood/Tom Riddle, Luna becomes a captive of the dark lord)

Full Circle (Harry Potter, Harry wins and is miserable)

The Web of a Thousand Spiders (Luna Lovegood on the diary)

The Metronome (The fall of Lucius’ entire generation)

Understand (Hermione Granger and her betrayal of her parents)

Tea with the Headmaster (Severus Snape and Albus Dumbledore, the pair have tea)

This Grief Feeling (Hermione Granger and Severus Snape after the end)

After Innocence (The trio after the end)

Of Great Turmoil and Excess Stupidity (Sesshomaru and Hagrid, Inuyasha crossover, Hagrid decides to capture a demon for class)

What’s Left of Hope (Severus Snape and Albus Dumbledore, on preserving hope)

In His Keep (Severus Snape and Luna Lovegood, Snape informs Luna her father has died)

Wednesday (Petunia Evans, introspective)

In the Presence of Angels (Moody in WWII)

What He Grows to Be (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Harry Potter raises Tom Riddle in the past and it goes horribly wrong)

Being Cassandra (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Harry Potter, Tom, and their strange AU friendship)

The Girl (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, a fem Harry Potter keeps accidentally appearing in Tom’s childhood)

Corruption (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Tom wins AU and female Harry slowly becomes corrupted)

One Night Stand (Tom Riddle/Lily Evans, a wonderful look on the first war, Tom Riddle, Lily Evans, the Order of the Phoenix, and terrorism)

The Voldemort Principle (Severus Snape, turns out Snape was Voldemort the whole time and Harry is a lying liar who lies)

Harry Potter and the mountain of pure diamond (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Harry has become an ageless god who travels worlds and decides to raise Tom Riddle. He’s disturbed when he realizes Tom is more of a person than he is)

A Road Less Travelled By (Harry Potter/Lucius Malfoy, Harry’s a veela, just read it, it’s amazing, I know I sound crazy but it is)

Transformation (Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy, Draco gets eaten by the Forbidden Forest and then Harry gets eaten too)

Rock Bottom (Tom Riddle/Harry Potter, Tom gets trapped being defense professor and has a miserable time)

#ask #anon #harry potter #recommendations

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tomorrowsdrama · 3 years

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2020: A Year in Thirst

In 1985, Gabriel Garcia Marquez gave the world Love in the Time of Cholera. In 2020 (er, I guess it’s now 2021), I give to you, Thirst in the Time of Covid-19 or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Embrace the Thirst, a brief recap of all the dramas I watched in 2020 and whether such dramas made yours truly parched..

The list contains dramas that premiered in 2020, but also dramas from previous years. If I watched it or attempted to watch it in 2020, it’s on the list.

EDIT: Ok, I’m going to have to do this in multiple parts because apparently I watched more dramas in 2020 than I remembered and talking about them all in one post would just be too long.

This also serves as a sort of greeting to all the people who recently followed me. I don’t know how or why, but thank you for being interested in my thirst, and also so sorry for everything you have/will witness here! I started this side blog last December 2019 as a place to dump all my fangirl feels and thirst with unbridled abandon and let’s just say, the thirst REALLY ramped up in 2020 during quarantine and all the political chaos/uncertainty. The state of the world may be uncertain, but my thirst will always be a comforting constant! LOL. If you want to thirst or fangirl/boy together, I’m all ears.

Anyway, let’s start with the drama that was partially the inspiration for this list.

1. The Wolf

Brief Summary: Sweet hot boy raised in the wilderness/by wolves meets sweet beautiful girl and they fall in love. Shitty evil people do shitty evil things to them to cause a misunderstanding and they are separated for years. Sweet hot boy is given the “Sexy Bloody Tormented Killer Makeover” TM and turns into a VERY VERY BAD HOT Wolf Man after being tortured/brainwashed by an evil asshole king who “adopted” him. Bad Hot Wolf Man reunites with sweet beautiful girl but because of third party machinations in the past, he thinks that she betrayed him so he is suuuuuuch an ass to her (while still maintaining hotness). But even beneath the asshattery (and sexy jerky smirks), he can’t help his love for her and it’s just *chefs kiss*. The angst, the pining, the mutual sacrifice for each other, the torment of wanting to be together but not being able to be together because of external forces/circustances, oh I am getting in a tizzy just thinking about it. I won’t reveal anymore so as not to spoil the drama, but just know the ending may destroy you.

Is she thirsty? Am I thirsty? AM I THIRSTY? Oh honey, if you don’t know the answer to that, then you must either be new here or you haven’t been paying attention to any of my posts in the past few weeks. Look, from the first moment the camera panned to Darren Wang’s very well-defined and tan chest and windswept hair, all semblance of shame and dignity I ever tried to feign on this tumblr was immediately thrown out the window. The feelings that he inspired within me were purely primal. My cavewoman ancestor from millennia ago stopped gathering food in the harsh wilderness for a brief second to transmigrate into my body and go “me want big strong man!”

I mean, below is literally our introduction to Wolf Boy. Am I supposed to just witness this and not feel anything? The director knew what he/she was doing. Anybody who worked on the drama who says they didn’t intend to exploit Darren Wang’s assets is a BOLD FACED LIAR. And this isn’t even Wolf boy in his hottest form.

That would be this:

Damn, your girl needs a moment here. When Wolf Boy turns into Bad Hot Wolf Man, wheeeeewww. The things that came out of my mouth and the thoughts that popped up into my head.

Examples of shameless fangirl drooling can be found here: https://tomorrowsdrama.tumblr.com/post/636986055498792960/dangermousie-this-should-be-illegal-i-mean Here: https://tomorrowsdrama.tumblr.com/post/637238885944033280/dangermousie-i-am-fucking-dead-the-end-this Here: https://tomorrowsdrama.tumblr.com/post/637793196830769152/dangermousie-wolfie-acquired-a-kid-omg Here: https://tomorrowsdrama.tumblr.com/post/635272988321775616/dangermousie-i-dont-know-about-you-guys-but and here: https://tomorrowsdrama.tumblr.com/post/637621638524977152/dangermousie-hnnnnnnnngh-i-am-beginning-to-forget

Honestly, just check out The Wolf tag on @dangermousie tumblr and you won’t be disappointed. Prepare to become obsessed, horny, and heartbroken.

Would I watch it minus the thirst traps? Have you ever thirsted so much that you couldn’t separate what reaction was hormonal and what was objective? Like the guy is so hot to you that when your friends ask you what do you like about him, the first 10 things you can think of are “he’s hot!” and then you try to remind yourself that you’re not a shallow person who actually cares about things other than looks but at the same time you can’t for the life of you think of a non-hot based trait that you like about the guy Yeah, that’s what happened here so sorry, I can’t give you an objective opinion. It’s not that there’s nothing objectively good about The Wolf, it’s just that my judgment is too clouded by Darren Wang’s abs and big hands. But from what I can tell by other people’s posts, even if you didn’t thirst for Darren Wang (Are you made of stone? But also, can you please teach me your magic so I can go back to being a semi-functional working woman?), The Wolf is still a very enjoyable drama with its own non-Darren Wang related merits.

2. My Beautiful Bride

Brief Summary: A drama about a strait-laced banker who wears a dorky backpack and rides a bicycle everywhere while wearing the dorkiest looking helmet ever and his beautiful bride-to-be whom he is hopelessly devoted to. This being a kdrama, and an OCN drama at that, things aren’t all what they appear to be. Yes, you read that right, an OCN. ROMANCE. DRAMA. Turns out the beautiful bride-to-be has a dangerous past that soon comes back to haunt her and she mysteriously disappears one day from strait-laced banker’s life in the typical kdrama way to protect him. Part of the reason she leaves him is also because she doesn’t want him to know about her past because she doesn’t think she’s good enough for him. Little does she know, he knows everything about her past and accepts it all. The only reason why he doesn’t bring it up is because he knows she doesn’t want him to know about that part of herself and he loves her so much he’s willing to do anything to make her happy. But also, another thing she doesn’t know is that underneath that boring but perfectly ironed suit, is a finely chiseled, super efficient fighting machine who did his mandatory military service in the special forces. He is like the terminator meets Liam Neeson’s character in Taken. He has a very particular set of skills and will stop at nothing to get his bride back.

Is she thirsty? Please just watch this video and you will have your answer: https://youtu.be/Ut9MhxWadHM

Prior to The Wolf, My Beautiful Bride was probably the most thirst-inducing drama I watched in 2020.

I mean, just look

at this

at all of this

I don’t’ know how Joo Young saw that body and never questioned whether he really was just a banker. The writers of the drama must be super heterosexual men who are blind because so many of the characters in the drama question why someone as beautiful as Joo Young would ever want to be with someone like the banker. Um..Um...aside from the fact that he is financially well off, treats her well, is loving and respectful of her, and prioritizes her over everything else, JUST LOOK AT HIM. I was so thirsty for Kim Mu Yeol in this role that I would accidentally tag this drama as My Beautiful Banker sometimes. The banker was on a relentless one-man mission to take back his bride and turn me on in the process and ooooooh boy was he successful on both fronts. He is seriously sex on legs every time he beats up a baddie in his quest to find answers about Joo Young’s whereabouts.

Would I watch it minus the thirst traps? I binged the first six episodes of this drama in one afternoon partly because of my thirst, but also partly because it’s a very well made crime-action-gangster drama. This is an OCN drama so you can expect a competently made production with well choreographed/bloody action scenes and a solid script.

3. Scarlet Heart Ryeo / Moon Lovers

Brief Summary: IU plays Hae Soo, a modern woman who is somehow transported back in time to the Goryeo period. There, she gets entangled with a group of royal princes. Her two main love interests are Wang So (played by Lee Jun Ki) and Wang Wook (played by Kang Ha Neul). The princes vie for the throne and some of them for Hae Soo’s affection. Lee Jun Ki does what he does best, which is play a sexy tortured deadly man who looks way too good with blood splattered on his face. Kang Ha Neul is the seemingly kind prince/daddy long legs character who turns out to be not so kind or daddy long leggy. Hae Soo is...well IU did the best she could with what she was given (which was a hot inconsistent mess).

Is she thirsty? Scarlet Heart Ryeo is like the honeypot of thirst traps. It’s essentially a reverse harem set up with a prince for everyone.

Like them young and cute? Then try the 10th prince, Wang Eun.

Want them big, tall, and kinda dumb? Here’s the 14th prince Wang Jung for ya.

Want an evil bastard with an affinity for guyliner? Try out 3rd prince Wang Yo.

Tall, slender, and scholarly? 13th prince Baek-ah will fill your needs.

Is a kind/gentle man who will ultimately disappoint you because he doesn’t show up when you need him most more your speed? Well, let me introduce you to 8th prince, Wang Wook.

Kinda scary but oh so hot and with a ton of baggage? We’re talking, I overpacked and brought 10 overstuffed large suitcases levels of baggage. 4th prince Wang So is the guy for you.

And if you prefer someone with no personality, presence, or memorable traits, I got a two-for-one deal for you in the crown prince Wang Mu and 9th prince Wang Won.

Would I watch it minus the thirst traps? There is political intrigue, scheming, romance, fluffy hijinks (my least favorite parts of the drama), angst, beautiful costumes, and pretty decent fight scenes. Scarlet Heart Ryeo is a pretty solid fusion/fantasy sageuk mostly thanks to Lee Jun Ki. The only person who has ever carried a larger load on his back is Atlas. I’m not saying all the other actors are horrendous. It’s just very clear that the one elevating the material beyond the inconsistencies/messiness/elementary politics of the script is Lee Jun Ki. Your enjoyment level of the drama will likely increase if you are a fan of any of the main actors.

#the wolf #darren wang #my beautiful bride #kim mu yeol #scarlet heart ryeo #moon lovers: scarlet heart ryeo #lee jun ki #kang ha neul #ji soo #cdrama #kdrama

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cheri-translates · 4 years

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[CN] Kiro’s Greenhouse Date (Eng Translation)

🍒Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date which has not been released in English servers!🍒

Note: This is a cancelled date which will unlikely come to EN :<

More from this Collection: Gavin // Lucien // Victor

The date begins with MC commenting on how Kiro has been extremely busy lately. He hasn’t been picking up calls, and his messages have been short. MC also notes that although he appears normal on television, his eyes have become slightly dimmer.

MC recalls how Kiro has always been giving her strength whenever she’s feeling low, so she decides to do the same for him. She sends him a message:

MC: Miss Chips’ personalized mystery surprise, only applicable to Mr Kiro. Please claim this prize within the one hour time limit, or else it will expire~

After sending the message, I continue watching the television. However, I am entirely focused on my phone and alerted to every chime it makes.

Almost an hour passes and Kiro has not replied. While I’m hesitating whether or not to call him, my phone finally vibrates.

Kiro: This is the special prize winner Mr Kiro. I wish to ask Miss Chips – what exactly is my prize?

His tone is tinged with tiredness, but he still ends his sentences with a cheery lilt.

MC: It shall remain a secret. All you have to do is give me your time this Sunday!

Kiro is stunned for a moment, then a smile seeps into his voice.

Kiro: [laughs] When did you learn this trick of mine?

MC: Heh heh, I’m not telling you. Once you have accepted the prize, there’s no backing out!

Kiro: Yes, Mr Kiro promises Miss Chips.

MC: That’s great! I was even worried… ah, nothing….

Kiro: Worried about what? Were you anxious that I almost didn’t respond in time? I guessed correctly, didn’t I?

MC: Hmph, that’s because I didn’t want to waste my surprise.

Hearing this, Kiro chuckles from the other end of the line. The tiredness that was in his voice earlier has dissipated quite a bit.

MC: So it’s settled, I’ll come find you on Sunday.

Kiro: Even though it’s your surprise, how could I let you be the one to look for me? Don’t worry, I’ll slip away secretly and pick you up!

Before I hang up, Kiro suddenly mutters apologetically.

Kiro: Actually, my phone wasn’t by my side just now. It was only after I took a call that I saw your message. Were you very anxious while waiting?

MC: It’s all right. I was thinking that if you didn’t reply, I would tell you that the time limit got extended by another hour…

Kiro: [laughs] Do you know that hearing you say that makes me really happy? Even happier than hearing about the mystery surprise!

Kiro’s tone is gentle, and I can almost see a golden retriever from the corner of my eye, wagging its tail and smiling at me.

Kiro: All right, so it’s settled.

Hanging up the phone, I find myself smiling. Kiro has always been bringing me to his secret hide-outs to recharge my batteries. This time, it’s my turn.

MC has already planned how Sunday would go. Judging from Kiro’s busy schedule, he wouldn’t have had the time to go flower viewing. He also wouldn’t be able to go to public flower viewing places, considering his celebrity status.

MC: Or else, one wouldn’t be able to tell whether the crowd is there to see the flowers or Kiro.

Sunday arrives. While waiting for Kiro, MC recalls how she asked her father’s friend, Uncle Gu, for permission to use his personal greenhouse. When she was younger, she would visit the large greenhouse and her worries would melt away when surrounded by the gorgeous flowers.

Even though she is unsure if Kiro would be interested in flower viewing, she thinks the change of scenery should allow him to relax.

While she is deep in thought, someone covers her eyes from behind.

The coolness of a ring brushes against my cheek, carrying the scent of its owner.

MC: Kiro…

?: Who is Kiro? I’m the special prize winner of your mystery surprise.

Pushing away the hands that are covering my eyes, I turn around to see Kiro wearing a pair of sunglasses.

He has deep eye bags, but his tired-looking expression has an insuppressible grin. I lean towards him.

MC: You look so fatigued. Did you not rest well?

Hearing this, Kiro furrows his eyebrows, his blinking eyes full of grievances.

Kiro: Yeah, I haven’t slept for three nights, and I feel so dizzy…

He says this slowly, and I hurriedly stand on my tiptoes, wanting to test his temperature.

MC: We shouldn’t have come out then… could it be a fever…

I look into Kiro’s clear eyes. He lets out a grin, looking a sly squirrel.

MC: You tricked me!

I purse my lips, my face flushing as I turn to the side.

Kiro hurriedly grabs on to my sleeve, a pitiful expression on his face.

Kiro: Okay okay I was wrong, don’t be angry, all right?

Kiro appears in my line of sight no matter which direction I turn my head. Looking at me with his bright eyes, my temper disappears in an instant.

MC: Fine, I’m no longer angry… Kiro is such a childish ghost.

Without a trace of anger or shock, Kiro continues smiling.

Kiro: Yes, I’m a childish ghost, and Miss Chips is the cutest~

MC: You’re shameless…

Kiro: I’m not. Isn’t it normal for a man to reveal his childish side to the person he likes? I even thought you heard about this saying before…

Kiro seems a little disappointed. He mutters, pulling me into the car.

I turn to look at him and see his side profile bathed in sunlight. The layer of gold makes his entire form look lively, fresh, and beautiful.

Now silent, Kiro’s face has a look of maturity that wasn’t there before. My heart suddenly does a flip, and I try not to think about what he said just now.

They finally reach Uncle Gu’s place, but it has been refurbished with additional features, so they have to walk through an eerie tree-lined pathway. MC gets goosebumps and nervously holds his hand.

Kiro: Eh?

MC: This is to prevent someone from running away suddenly.

Kiro: That wouldn’t happen. I’m not scared at all.

Trying to prove his point, Kiro tightens his grip on my hand, with an expression which says that he is unfazed by any circumstances.

We hold each other’s hands tight and walk forward step-by-step.

Kiro stands in front of me slightly, as though prepared to defend me at any moment.

His actions remind me of our experience at the haunted house, which he specially brought me to to prove his bravery. This time round, he doesn’t seem as afraid, though his palms are still sweating.

As we continue down the long pathway, Kiro seems to become increasingly relaxed. While he walks, he sniffs the air, just like an animal following the scent of food.

MC: What are you smelling?

Kiro: Dummy! I’m smelling the flowers of course.

MC: I don’t think I mentioned the greenhouse as being the mystery surprise. Can you really smell it?

Kiro: Of course! Also, I’ve confirmed that this place has a gigantic patch of Monet. I can already smell it!

MC: Monet? Isn’t he an artist?

Kiro: Heh heh looks like you don’t know! Here, follow me!

Saying this, Kiro pulls me into a run.

We run through the long corridor of vines, pass by a few patches of colorful flowers, and finally stand in front of a small wooden door with “Rosa chinensis” written on it.

Pointing at the sea of pink flowers beyond the wooden door, his eyes are filled with satisfaction.

Kiro: I was right! Like I said, there are Monets here.

MC: You’re saying that the Rosa chinesis is called Monet?

Kiro: Right! These pink flowers with yellow streaks are called… let me think! Yes, Claude Monet! They smell really good!

MC takes a closer look at the flowers and realizes that the flowers have a fruity smell. She can understand how Kiro could recognize them from afar.

MC: Are you very knowledgeable about the Rosa chinesis?

Kiro: Yes! When I was studying in France, I was a volunteer at the Botanic Gardens. Because some things happened, there was a period of time when I couldn’t attend school. I spent my entire day in the Botanic Gardens, and I learnt a lot about the Rosa chinesis. For example, how they differ from roses, the different parts of the Rosa chinesis, and the different types… only then did I realise that the simple-looking Rosa chinesis could also be so beautiful.

MC: It shares the same name as the prolific artist Monet though.

Kiro: Mmhmm, I originally thought that it got its name because it shared the same colours as Monet’s paintings. Later on, I discovered that it was far from that.

MC: Eh? Then what’s the reason?

Kiro: The Monet flower is extremely strong against diseases. It can’t be destroyed no matter what diseases plague it. Instead, it blooms even more beautifully. Monet was also such an artist. I saw his letter in the museum and learnt that he didn’t have a good life. He was sick and poor. Even so, he could bring people warmth. He taught me that sunlight is the most meaningful thing in the world, and that all of us have the ability to make choices.

Kiro keeps his eyes on the flowers, his expression lifting into a smile. It’s a different smile from before – a genuine smile that belongs to him, a smile stemming from his innermost heart.

I suddenly feel like I’ve been transported several years back, and I can see a younger Kiro standing amid the flowers with a brilliant smile.

When I return to my senses, Kiro’s big eyes are less than ten centimeters away from me.

I instinctively shrink backwards, but Kiro reaches out for my shoulder.

Kiro: Why are you dazing off while looking at my face? Be honest, what are you thinking about?

MC: I… I was just thinking about how you’re similar to Monet. You’re always bringing people brightness and warmth.

While saying this, Kiro continues staring at me, his pure eyes looking into my heart.

That person whose entire body exudes light, and is always giving me strength… he should have such pure eyes.

Kiro laughs, his eyes crinkling.

Kiro: Monet spent his life chasing after the light. That’s where we differ. I’m even better than him, because I have already found my light.

He blinks at me, as though he is keeping a major secret, waiting for me to probe further.

I am slightly stunned and am unsure how to respond.

Kiro: Why aren’t you asking me what my light is?

[Note: At this moment, Kiro has that “I’ve been flirting with you for the past year, thanks for noticing” face]

Looking at his expression, I laugh and play along with him.

Kiro responds with a sentence in French, and I don’t understand it.

MC: What did you say?

Kiro: I’ll tell you if you dance with me.

MC: How does that even work... you were the one who prompted me to ask that question…

Acting on his own whims, Kiro lifts up my left hand while hooking onto my right hand, pulling me into a dancing posture.

MC: …eh?

In contrast to my surprise, Kiro’s face is beaming.

His lips curve upwards, like a squirrel hugging a pinecone tightly and showing it off to its friends with pride.

His blue eyes are glimmering, as though they contain the entire galaxy.

In the center of that galaxy are two tiny faces, each of them belonging to me.

The atmosphere seems to have shifted suddenly.

MC: What did you just say?

Kiro: I said, dance with me.

MC: No, I’m referring to that thing you said in French…

Before I even finish, Kiro leans close to my ear and mutters something incredibly quickly.

Kiro: It’s too late.

MC: Huh? What do you mean by that?

Kiro: I just told you the meaning, so it’s too late to reject me now.

What…

My ears start reddening. Even though this is a private greenhouse, I’m slightly embarrassed to dance here.

MC: You-

Kiro: What about me?

MC: There isn’t any music so we can’t dance!

I instantly regret once the words slip out of my mouth.

Kiro: Music?

Kiro blinks.

With a sly grin, he starts humming a tune.

Only after five notes, I have already guessed what tune he is humming.

MC: …the doll and teddy bear dance?

[Note: I went to check and it’s an actual song bless his pure heart]

Kiro: Yep. Don’t you think it’s similar to our current situation? Miss Chips~

He stretches out the way he says “Miss Chips”, ending with a smile in his voice.

MC: Am I the teddy bear? Or the doll?

Kiro: [laughs] Of course…

Kiro purposefully drags out his answer, leading me into a slightly inaccurate rendition of ballroom dancing. He twirls me around.

Kiro: …you are my Miss Chips!

I am tickled by his words. The embarrassment I felt earlier vanishes without a trace.

MC: Fine… don’t blame me if I step on you.

Kiro: Don’t worry, it wouldn’t happen!

Where does Kiro’s confidence come from?

I understand once I cooperate and start dancing with him.

MC: Stop, stop, I’m not dancing any longer! My head’s going to explode from the twirling. How is this considered dancing?

The reason why Kiro was so sure I wouldn’t step on him is because this isn’t the ballroom dancing I envisioned at all! Most of the time I end up getting twirled around by Kiro.

Kiro: Don’t you know that this is a sort of dance too?

With a smile, he leans close to my ear, saying this clearly. Several blurry Kiros appear in my vision.

Kiro: Don’t you find this blurry feeling amazing? It’s like how people go to bars to get drunk.

MC: So you’re feeling great now?

His words seem to take on a deeper meaning, but I’m unable to grasp them in my dizzy state.

Kiro: Mm, incredibly happy!

Kiro nods his head vigorously.

MC: All right. At least all that twirling didn’t go to waste.

The main purpose of today was to help Kiro relieve stress. So as long as he’s happy, that’s fine.

My pride doesn’t matter, and the dizziness doesn’t matter!

With this thought in mind, I let out a laugh.

Kiro: What are you laughing at?

I see three sets of Kiros reaching out to me with three hands. However, I can only feel one hand on my forehead, tidying my fringe.

MC: Because I get to see you being genuinely happy.

Kiro: You’re happy when you see me happy?

Kiro’s voice is laced with anticipation.

MC: Of course I’m happy. Normally, you’re the one taking me to your secret hide-outs to recharge my batteries and relieve stress. It’s as though you hold all the sunlight in the world. But I’ve never asked whether you ever feel down. This time round, let me be your rubbish bin and get rid of your troubles. I want to peel away all the grey clouds that are blocking the sun.

While I’m saying this, Kiro stands in front of me quietly, watching me with his head slightly lowered. His expression is serious, and his eyes are focused and deep.

He looks like Kiro on the stage, yet not exactly so.

MC: Hmm… even though I don’t know what you’re troubled by, or what pressure you’re under, I can sense that it isn’t because of a creative block. If you don’t want to talk about it, or if you can’t tell me-

Before the words “it’s okay” leave my lips, I am scooped into a pair of incredibly warm arms.

Caught off guard, I fall into Kiro’s embrace.

I hear Kiro’s heartbeats, like a tiny drum, fast and without rhythm.

My heart feels ticklish, as though thousands of ants have crawled into it.

I feel sunlight on the top of my head. It’s so warm.

It’s almost noon and Kiro has to return to work. Why does time pass by so quickly?

Kiro: MC, why are you so adorable! I am really, very very very happy today!

He speaks incredibly slowly. Every “very” seems to carry with it the solemnity of experience and time.

Kiro: MC, thank you.

MC: A-are you happy today? Did you like my mystery surprise?

Kiro: Mm! I love it! Today is Kiro’s second happiest day.

MC: Which is your first happiest day then?

Kiro: Well… I will keep that a secret for now. I’ll definitely tell you in the future.

He puts a lot of weight on the word “definitely”, making me think that the day in question is somehow related to me.

MC: You still haven’t told me what you said in French…

Kiro hugs me even more tightly, and his voice travels to my ear.

Kiro: MC, you are my light.

🍯

Phone call: here

#mlqc #mlqc cn #love and producer #mlqc kiro #mlqc spoilers #a buffet of all the sugary goodness this world has to offer #this date ALWAYS brightens my day #hope it cheers you up if you’re feeling low right now <3 #cncancelled

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gallavichy · 4 years

Text

long post regarding my stress and twitter. tl;dr ahead of the game: i’m deleting my twitter account because it’s making me panicky.

i know a lot of you on tumblr don’t use twitter, and in the past, i’d never used it for anything other than to follow celebrities before i started writing lrpd/getting involved with shameless and realized most of the fandom activity is over there. that was odd for me because i’ve always used tumblr (and livejournal before that), but then i wasn’t active in any fandom for like two years, and i guess the transition happened during that time period.

i really like the short-form nature of twitter. i like how my timeline is constantly busy, there’s always something to read and laugh at and think about, but as i’ve gotten more followers, i’ve started getting panicky.

i have panic disorder. i’ve been in therapy for anxiety since i was fourteen. i also have social anxiety (which is why i’m miserable at maintaining messaging conversations) and spiraling fears. and though i enjoy the positive things on twitter, it’s terrible for my mental health, and i’ve been ignoring it for months.

i have loved seeing memes and fanart and all of that for lrpd, and i love fluffy headcanons, which i’ve been posting recently because they make me happy, but all of this is also a near-constant reminder of exactly how many people are reading my fic.

this has never happened to me before. i’ve had fics in other fandoms, but the most popular ones simply consisted of links that were shared around tumblr for like a week, received 10k+ hits on ao3, and that was it and everyone would forget. and i was really cool with that. i’m always happy people appreciate my work (and i’m so thankful for my readers!), but i also enjoy being able to just chill between updates, and i enjoy people not knowing me (again--social anxiety here) solely because of my fic, which allows me to just do my own thing until i want to write again.

but on twitter, i am getting increasingly uncomfortable with the fact that due to so many people reading my fic and actively following me, i can’t control where things go once i post something. i can’t control who sees it. i can’t control who interacts with it. mostly, i can’t control the ages of the people who follow me on social media.

i want to retweet fanart--even the nsfw stuff because it’s amazing and beautiful and i’m so appreciative of the love that went into it--but then i get a message about how i shouldn’t retweet nsfw stuff because i’m exposing the people who follow me to it, which freaks me out and causes me to un-tweet things. (and i get the argument but like, i wanna be able to be an adult on the internet with other adults and not worry about this so much.) and i have to constantly police everything i say and everyone i interact with because people have tweet notifications on for me, so if i make a comment to a fellow adult about an adult work, what i’ve tweeted gets exposure because everything i say shows up on some people’s timelines, and then i’ve got the fears of, “shit--did the high schooler who is following me see the art i just commented on?” and that stresses me out. and i know i can’t control who follows me aside from checking every single person’s age and blocking them (or protecting my tweets), but i just don’t like being inside of that environment. i want to be an adult inside of an adult space with other adults talking about an adult show, and that’s really hard to do on twitter, which seems to be skewed younger, and constantly being sensitive to that and worried about it has made me enormously stressed.

and because of my mental health situation, what might be a small worry for some is genuinely something that gives me significant anxiety.

so this is just to say that i’m going solely back to tumblr because--while i still can’t control who follows me--there’s so many other things i CAN control, and i think the age group is skewed a little more toward me, which will help me control my social media audience and presence a little.

i love everyone from twitter, and i’m so thankful for all of the support over the past couple months. i’m so happy that people are excited about my writing, about my version of ian and mickey, and i don’t want to ever put a stop to enjoyment. i just want to be able to remain in my own space in a location that isn’t so in-your-face, public, and difficult to maintain.

#mine #text

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empressarcana · 3 years

Note

Hi, Lucy. Fist off sorry for bothering you, I know you're living thogh days. Dear I've living a thogh life, since my childhood full of violence, abandonment, poverty... I'm 28 and the last 6 years I've been fighting a deep deep depression. The start point of this situation was when I lost my job, but tbh, I was carrying all the pain since I was little girl and for the first time I allowed my heart cry out for all the things from my past and entire life. I used to live pretending that I was fine and "period". But since this event I just couldn't ... There's day that I feel a tiny hope regarding to my life, but most of the days is all about darkness. 3 years ago I tried suicide and I'm so embarrassed to even talk about that, because I'm feel like a coward and I know how much I have to fight in this life. I don't want to took your time, I know you are busy with your readings and personal stuffs, but I like to ask you as big favor, 1 card reading for my life in general, and I'm only asking this (shameless), because I know you used to read 1 oracle card (I think) for your followers...

Have a nice day, Lucy. I'm wishing all the blessings from the Cosmos/Universe/Celestial Creator/God/Jesus/Saints/Angels/Spirits. And thank you very much for you positive posts and for gives us the opportunity to talk to you on your blog.

Stay strong, dear.

Love,

Hello my beautiful, Anon!

You are not bothering me at all, dear. Thank you for sharing with me your story, your words. I’m so sorry you’ve gone through so much. 😔

You are not a coward at all. I feel you are brave and continue to fight. Don’t feel embarrassed to open up, to talk. Courage comes in many forms. I’m so glad you are here, Anon. Thank you for existing. I don’t mind pulling some cards for you. 💗

I tuned into your energy and pulled some cards for you. We have some beautiful cards here, my lovely Anon. Starting with “Opening to discovery”, this is the time to use the key and open the door. The heavy weight on your shoulders from the past must be released and I feel, ironically, someone from your past will help you in doing so. In the 6 of cups, this is a card of nostalgia, revisiting memories but not alone. This card is very special to me, whenever I see the 6 of cups, I am reminded of the star flowers in the cups, how each of the flowers are a light of hope for the future. Each star flower carries a light, just like every person has a light within. Your light shines brightest when you are feeling inspired, dancing, enjoying the moment, even through the struggles, finding a way back to the love.

I see in the Lovers card bonds, relationships, choices, being able to embrace them all from a higher vibration. In the “Call of the Muse”, I feel Spirit is saying to truly embrace the dance of life, being present in the moment. The past stays in the past. The future is not here, yet. Right now, the present, the here and now wants you to open the door because there is so much to explore.

You are a strong force. I feel the choice you might be working toward has to do with the past or future, but it’s okay to break the mold. If something doesn’t resonate with you, make your own choice, do what is best for you. The cards are showing a huge shift toward inner healing and love. I keep seeing secrets being unlocked, dancing with a dear friend. The Universe is calling and wants you to have some fun, become inspired, and work on manifesting all you deserve and more.

Thank you again for stopping by my blog, dear! You can always stop by. I will always answer, even if I might take awhile. I love talking to you all. I want to see everyone smiling and loving openly, bravely, being yourself, trusting yourself. You’ve got this. Let’s stay strong, together! 💪

Also, for anyone needing to talk, I am here. Send me a message, a question. I’ll respond and will do my best to help you gain some clarity.

I will be adding the National Suicide Prevention Hotline here as well. 1-800-273-8255 If you need to talk to someone, please seek someone out. You are never alone.

Sending so much love and feel good vibes everyone’s way! 💗 I love you all so much! 💗

#empress replies #lovely anons #thank you all for existing

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inthedayswhenlandswerefew · 4 years

Text

Eccentricity [Chapter 2: You Can Run Around Infinite In My Head]

Series Summary: Joe Mazzello is a nice guy with a weird family. A VERY weird family. They have a secret, and you have a choice to make.

Potentially a better love story than Twilight (we’ll let @killer-queen-xo decide when it’s all said and done 😉).

Chapter Title Is A Lyric From: Rome by Dermot Kennedy.

Chapter Warnings: Language, mentions of violence.

Other Chapters (And All My Writing) Available: HERE

Tagging: @queen-turtle-boiii @bramblesforbreakfast @killer-queen-xo @maggieroseevans @culturefiendtrashqueen @imnotvibingveryguccimrstark @escabell @im-an-adult-ish @queenlover05 @someforeigntragedy @imtheinvisiblequeen @seven-seas-of-ham-on-rhye @deacyblues @tensecondvacation @brianssixpence

Please yell at me if I forget to tag you! 💜

Missing In Action

I wish she would stop staring at me.

Lucille sat at the Lees’ usual table and apathetically picked through a heaping salad. (Friday was salad bar day, which I appreciated considerably more than the chicken finger obsession that marred Mondays at Calawah University.) Every once in a while, Rami nudged her and Lucille would spear a cherry tomato with her fork and bite it in half with perfectly even, white teeth. But her large blue-green eyes—they reminded me of webs of seaweed tumbling in the cold, frothing La Push waves—always found their way back to me, strangely focused, inquisitive, perhaps accusatory.

Ben probably told them how much he hates me for whatever nebulous reason and now they all hate me too and I’m going to spend the next two years being death-glared by five ridiculously attractive and somewhat incestuous foster kids.

Chemistry was a three times a week class. Ben hadn’t shown on Wednesday, and I was 99% sure he would skip again today. I spotted him around campus periodically, always from a distance: dropping quarters into a vending machine, clandestinely vaping behind dorm buildings (what self-respecting pre-med student VAPES?!!), browsing YouTube videos in the library next to a tower of unopened textbooks, biology and chem and physics and calculus. He wasn’t home, he wasn’t sick; there was no attempt made to construct any sort of pretext. He was patently avoiding me.

I stabbed moodily at the serrated disks of cucumber in my salad. Jessica was blathering away about the latest season of The Bachelor and ranking the contestants’ eyebrows from best to worst. “...Like seriously, has she never heard of microblading?!”

“For real,” Angela offered, not especially invested but forever a good sport.

Lucille’s eyes settled on me again as she sipped a cup of steaming tea, staring until her forehead crinkled with the effort, staring hard, almost leering.

“What’s her problem?” I muttered.

Jessica shot a glance towards the Lee table and slurped her Sprite. The great mystery surrounding her potential Mormon-ness persisted. “Who? Lucy?”

Only Lucille’s friends called her Lucy. Jessica, a shameless aspiring socialite, presumed she was everybody’s friend unless they explicitly informed her otherwise, which of course no one ever did.

“Yeah,” I answered glumly.

“Maybe it’s your dress.”

“My dress? What’s wrong with my dress?”

Jessica wrinkled her nose and surveyed me as if I were a bug, and not a cute bug like a roly-poly bug or The Very Hungry Caterpillar or whatever. Like a really hideous bug. Like one of those spider-cricket hybrid things that hopped straight out of a hell dimension and into the dark, drippy corners of your basement. “It’s, like, very 1960s. But not in a sexy Woodstock way. In a ‘I’m about to join a hippie murder cult’ way.”

“I got it at TJ Maxx. It was on sale.”

Jessica snorted. “Probably for a reason.”

“That’s it. I’m giving all the hippies in my new murder cult your address.”

She and Angela laughed. Mike and Eric, the missing pieces of our daily lunch puzzle, were preoccupied with a campus protest to convert fried fish day (Thursdays) into tacos day. I sympathized with their efforts, but didn’t feel that my one-week tenure as a Calawah University student gave me much right to go around overhauling the dining hall schedule.

“I doubt she’s actually offended by a dress,” Angela said, nibbling on French fries that shed grains of salt like snowflakes.

Jessica sighed dreamily. “But Lucy’s just so fashionable...and that accent...” She drifted off into some daydream which began—I could only assume—with Lucy’s invitation to go shopping together and concluded with marrying Ben on some lush tropical island in the South Pacific.

Lucille was definitely fashionable, especially today: short black dress with sheer sleeves that ran to her fragile wrists, black polka dot tights, black heeled oxfords, dangling ruby earrings like beads of blood. She would have blended in perfectly at Paris Fashion Week. Rami was wearing a cardigan and khakis, per usual; Joe was in dark fitted jeans and a roomy U Chicago hoodie despite the fact that Forks was at minimum a thirty-four hour drive from the Windy City. What did Angela say his major was? Finance? No, Mathematical Economics. So he’s probably aiming at Chicago for an MBA or Econ PhD someday. Angela had told me that Joe was wicked smart. He better be if he’s entertaining fantasies of grad school at the University of Chicago.

Scarlett had come straight from Fencing Club and was wearing bright pink yoga pants and a t-shirt with the sleeves cut out, sprinkling Hot Cheetos into her open mouth, her blonde hair secured in a tight French braid. You know those girls who are so irrationally, gluttonously, unfairly beautiful that it doesn’t seem possible the genetic lottery could spit out so many winning numbers at once, and you comfort yourself with the certainty that there must be some set of circumstances that would level the playing field—I bet she looks like anyone else without all that makeup, she just has a really good sense of style and knows how to maximize her assets, there are definitely some goofy oversized ears hiding beneath that hair and that’s why she always wears it down—and then one day you run into them wearing sweatpants and a ponytail in the tampon aisle at Walmart and they’re still so perfect it stings you, baffles you, makes you feel like there must have been some divergence in the evolutionary chain because there’s no freaking way you’re the same species? Yeah, Scarlett was one of those girls. Scarlett was the queen of those girls.

Ben was conspicuously absent from the table.

Scarlett’s pink leopard-print iPhone rang and she answered. “Hello?” She turned to Joe. “Dad says you left your phone at home. Do you need it?”

Joe was gnawing his way through his third slice of pepperoni pizza. “No, I’m good, thanks though.”

Scarlett relayed the message. “Dad says he’s going to bring it by just in case.”

“Oh my god, ScarJo, I’m fine! Tell him not to!”

“Dad says he doesn’t trust you and he’s going to be here in fifteen minutes. He’s also bringing the Game Theory homework you left by the hot tub.”

Joe groaned and rolled his lively dark eyes as Rami grinned at him; Lucille was still watching me and entirely oblivious.

“Isn’t it weird that Ben and Lucille have accents?” I asked Jessica. “That they’re from the U.K.? I didn’t think fostering kids was an international thing.”

“It’s not that weird. Dr. Lee is British too. Maybe there’s some kind of exchange system, I don’t know. But you know what I do know?”

“What?” Now my interest was piqued.

She smiled. “That the British accents are hot.”

“Ugh,” I exhaled involuntarily.

“Please get a hobby,” Angela begged Jessica. “Start a YouTube channel. Make care packages for orphans. Grow marijuana. Adopt a cat. I have a shift at the animal shelter this Sunday morning, you want to come with me?”

“Sorry, can’t. I have a temple thing.”

Temple on Sunday. The mystery is solved. She’s a Mormon for sure. I mentally resolved not to let her set me up with anyone unless I was still single on Valentine’s Day. Which, obviously, assuming I’m not dead in a ditch somewhere, I will be.

I gathered up my trash and slung my backpack over my shoulder. “Okay, well this has been a bizarre lunch to be completely honest, and now I have to go to Chemistry so I’ll see you later and hopefully we can brainstorm some more alternatives to Jessica’s current life trajectory on Monday. Because I am not looking forward to being a bridesmaid in these impending Lee nuptials.”

“Oh please!” Jessica lamented. “He doesn’t even know I exist. You, on the other hand...”

I scoffed. “Yeah, he wants to kill me. I truly have a gift.”

They waved as I left. I could feel Lucille’s eyes on me until I reached the door.

Sure enough, Ben wasn’t in Chemistry. I tried not to notice. I drew my atoms, wrote my equations, took my notes diligently and in my favorite sky blue ink. But I felt the emptiness in the chair next to me like a black hole, like an immense and dragging weight, like a snag in the fabric of all those interwoven strands of physics that orchestrate the universe like an immortal puppeteer. Why can’t I forget this guy? Why do I still feel like I’ve met him before?

Halfway through class, I hauled my emergency sweatshirt out of my backpack and pulled it on over my dress, floral and flowing and golden yellow like the sun, the sun that never shines here in Forks. I had liked it plenty under the florescent lights of the fitting room at TJ Maxx, and I had still liked it this morning; but Jessica’s words hummed around in my skull like wasps. The zipper of the sweatshirt was broken, but it accomplished the task of obscuring my dress well enough.

After Chemistry, I journeyed to the campus library to find a book I was supposed to read and present for a different class. I looked it up in the computer catalogue, spent an embarrassingly long time trying to figure out how the Dewey Decimal System works, eventually wound up finding the book on the highest floor of the library...and, to add a little extra peril to the mission, on the highest shelf. The book mocked me from its lofty, unattainable stronghold. The title was embossed in gold letters down the crimson spine. The Walruses And Me: A Transformative Experience. Idiotic title, I’m aware. It’s about some marine biologist who spent months alone in the Arctic studying the lifecycles of walruses. A noble pursuit, sure, but still a terrible title.

There wasn’t a chair or stepstool in sight. I tested my weight by stepping up onto the second-lowest shelf. The metal immediately squealed and shifted in protest. I retreated back down to the carpet, defeated by gravity. I scowled up at the book and sighed melodramatically. Ugh.

“Need something?”

I spun around to see Joe in his University of Chicago hoodie and pale flawless skin and intangible magnetism, that bewildering trademark Lee ethereality. I instinctively crossed my arms, clutching the sleeves of my sweatshirt, shrinking inwards like a startled armadillo in the Arizona desert.

“Are you, uh, anemic...?” he ventured.

“Oh no, I’m not cold. I’m just trying to hide my dress. My friend said it was too hippie-murder-cult 1960s.”

I figured he’d laugh, make a snide comment, maybe just blink in confusion. Instead, he glimpsed down at my dress—what could still be seen of it, anyway—and shook his head. “The neckline isn’t right for the 60s. And you seem like you’ve showered at least once in the past two weeks, so definitely not a hippie.”

I smiled, completely unexpectedly. “I didn’t realize Econ majors knew anything about leftist counterculture.”

“Disparaging it is our favorite pastime. Are you trying to get a book or are you just disrespecting university property for entertainment?”

I pointed. “The big red one.”

“The Walruses And Me...?”

“I know, it’s a horrible title. Not my personal preference. It’s for a class.”

“Bestiality 101?”

“Good guess. Marine Mammals.”

“Ahhh.” He glanced up and down the aisle, tapped his chin with agile fingers, pondered something I wasn’t privy to. “Turn around for a second.”

“What? Why?”

He waved his hand mysteriously in front of his grinning face. “It’s a magic trick. I’m going to make your problem disappear.”

“You can’t climb that,” I warned. “You’ll fall and break your neck. Or you’ll knock the whole shelf over and cause a tragic domino effect and the university will withhold your diploma until you pay them restitution.”

“I’m extremely athletic.”

“Are you sure?” I appraised him with exaggerated skepticism for comedic effect. “My dad refers to you only as the spindly annoying Lee.”

Oh my god, WHY did I say that?

Now he would definitely hate me. Now I’d have two mortal enemies on one campus. I mentally calculated how humiliating it would be to transfer to some Florida college, any Florida college, after only one week at Calawah. Hi mom, yeah I’m coming to live with you and Paul, a gang of hot pasty foster kids wants to slaughter me.

Instead, Joe threw back his head and cackled wildly. A librarian—mid-fifties, angry red hair from out of a box, fuzzy cat sweater—glared into the aisle and shushed him.

“Chief Swan...he actually...he calls me that? Really?!” Joe managed, wiping his leaking eyes. “That’s hilarious. I’m so glad my life is in his hands. Okay seriously, turn around.”

“Why would you help me?” I asked suspiciously.

“That’s just what I do. I’m a friendly guy.”

“This friendliness must not run in the family.”

Again, Joe’s cheerful demeanor didn’t falter. “You mean Ben? Forget about Ben, he hates everyone. Don’t take it personally.” Then he added: “Plus, as I’m sure you know, we’re not biologically related. No overlapping genetic material whatsoever. I didn’t get the male supermodel gene, he didn’t get the irresistibly charming gene, life’s not fair but the world keeps spinning.”

“It sure does,” I agreed softly. Unexpected wisdom from my new favorite Lee. I turned away from him. “Fine, I’m not looking, go ahead and dazzle me with your supernatural friendliness—”

“Done.”

“What?” I whirled around. Joe held The Walruses And Me in his hand. “How...did you...?!”

He passed me the book as I sputtered incoherently. “I told you. Magic trick.”

“I don’t....?!” I gawked up at the top shelf, at Joe, back to the top shelf. Sure enough, the space where The Walruses And Me once lived was now just a vacant slit in the row of dusty books. How could he have climbed up there that quickly? How could I not have heard anything? “The shelves didn’t even creak,” I murmured shakily.

“Yes, well, that’s due to my conveniently spindly physique.” Joe winked. “Any other problems I can help you solve at the moment, Baby Swan?”

“No. And don’t call me Baby Swan, or I’ll push this whole bookshelf over and tell the feisty librarian lady you did it.”

“That’s cold, ma’am.”

I liked that Joe didn’t make me feel like Ben did: unworthy, unloved, infuriating. Joe made me feel something else, something lighthearted, casual, buoyant; like the world didn’t have anything in it worth worrying about, regretting, agonizing over. Like unadulteratedly myself was all I ever needed to be.

I heard a muted buzz and Joe slid his iPhone out of his jeans pocket. Dr. Lee must have successfully delivered it. “Whoops, I forgot that Ordinary Differential Equations existed. Got to go. See ya.”

“Bye,” I replied. And then Joseph Lee was gone, very quickly, a little too quickly, the same way that Ben had vanished on that first afternoon after Chemistry.

Forks is weird. Calawah University is weird. And the Lee kids are super fucking weird.

Long Walks On The Beach

“Can I ask you a random question?”

“You just paid me $100 for an oil change that took fifteen minutes. You can ask me anything you want.” He grinned, flashing bright teeth and deep dimples.

It was Saturday afternoon. I had shoveled down a Chipotle veggie bowl as Archer changed the 1999 Accord’s oil in a small garage with a cracked concrete floor and the searing pungency of gasoline fumes thick in the air. He had apprenticed all through high school and rented his own shop after graduation. Archer now had a loyal clientele that encompassed virtually the entire Quileute reservation and a growing chunk of Forks...including Charlie and me, of course. Archer was the only child of Larry Foxchild—Charlie’s best friend since they worked together at Dairy Queen as teenagers—and the closest thing to a son my dad would ever have. I guess that made him like a brother to me, something that seemed intuitive now that I’d thought of it.

After the Accord was serviced we drove it down to La Push to walk on the beach, climb the salt-lashed rocks, toss pebbles into the roiling surf, reprise our childhood enthusiasm for poking dead washed-up marine creatures with shards of driftwood.

“Do you know anything about the Lees?” I asked Archer, investigating a deceased green shore crab.

His brow furrowed. He looked so serious like that, suddenly so much like Larry: the same tan skin, jet black hair, umbral eyes like oil wells, strong jaw overlaid with the stubbled shadow of a beard. We really aren’t kids anymore, are we? “The doctor and his kids?”

“Yeah. The foster kids. They’re really pale and strange and half of them are British.”

Archer chuckled. “I know who you mean. They’re hard to miss.”

“Are they...” Just eccentric rich people? Traumatized from abusive childhoods? Government experiments? CIA agents? Secret murderers? The image of Ben in that first Chemistry class came roaring back to me, including the adjective that had flashed red behind my eyes like an emergency exit sign: fierce. Finally, I decided: “Dangerous?”

Now Archer full-on laughed, gripping his belly, shaking his head. Drops of saltwater flew from his short hair. “Seriously?!” he exclaimed. “Come on, they’re freaks but they’re not, like...that kind of freaks.”

“Are you sure?” I was starting to feel better already. Of course they’re not actual demons, you fucking idiot. This is Washington, not The Twilight Zone or Black Mirror. Not goddamn American Horror Story.

“Yeah.” Archer skipped a grey pebble over the water, something I’d never been able to do. “I’ll be honest, I don’t know them all that well. They usually keep to themselves. But I’ve never heard anything bad about any of the kids. And everyone respects Dr. Lee and appreciates him for taking the pay cut to come to some bumblefuck town like Forks. He’s insanely highly credentialed, has degrees from Harvard or Yale or somewhere like that. Super impressive. We’re lucky to have him. I definitely sleep better at night knowing he’ll be the one to fix me up if I ever get a few fingers ripped off on the job.”

“Don’t even say that. Then who would I grossly overpay for oil changes?”

Archer smiled, then sobered as he peered out over the Pacific Ocean.

“What?” I asked, feeling a plummeting in my guts like primal fear.

“Well...okay, so there is one thing that’s always bothered me. You remember Grandpa Foxchild?”

“Yeah, of course.” He had been an impossibly ancient man with long grey braided hair, a low rumbly voice, gnarled arthritic hands, ceaseless wrinkles. I remembered Charlie calling me when he passed away last spring. Renee and I had picked out a flower arrangement to send to the funeral.

“So,” Archer said slowly, like he was still puzzling it out himself. “Grandpa used to say things like ‘That Dr. Lee has been around a long time.’ Which of course makes no sense, the Lees moved here like two years ago. And I’d tell Grandpa that, but he completely ignored me. He would just keep repeating it. ‘That Dr. Lee shouldn’t still be here.’ ‘That Dr. Lee should go on home to where he came from.’ ‘That Dr. Lee isn’t right.’ Creepy shit like that. My dad and I always assumed it was the dementia talking, but...I don’t know. It just bothered me. Because Grandpa...he wasn’t just being gossipy or suspicious. He was angry. And he was afraid. Grandpa was at Guadalcanal and Iwo Jima and he would talk about that no problem, mention landmines or flesh melting off a soldier’s face like it was nothing. He was a tough guy. Immeasurably tough, I’ll never be half the man he was. But if you mentioned the Lees, Grandpa got scared. Why the hell would he be so scared of them?”

I didn’t have an answer for him, not a single word. I just stared at Archer, my eyes growing huge, my heart sprinting, blood pounding in my ears. He knew. Grandpa Foxchild knew there was something off about them, and now I know it too. I don’t know how I know, but I do.

Archer tittered nervously. “Anyway, that was genuinely disturbing. But like I said. It was probably just the dementia.”

“What if it wasn’t?”

“It had to be,” he insisted. “There’s no other logical explanation.”

“I guess,” I agreed, scooping up the green shore crab corpse with my bare hands. I hurled it out into the waves, imagined it sinking through murky water and suspended grains of sand, the body settling into prehistoric silt, the scavengers descending upon it, the inescapable wheel of birth and death and resurrection through those who unwittingly carry our atoms with them into the next generation, into the perpetual future.

That night my dreams were full of pale skin and scorching eyes, Ben and Joe and Rami, Lucille and Scarlett, crashing waves, cold water and bleached bones; and Grandpa Foxchild’s mistrustful refrain: That Dr. Lee has been around a long time.

Benjamin

I soared down the staircase and through the dining room. Gwil was working late at the hospital, Mercy outside tending the animals, everyone else presumably scattered throughout the house. I had to get out before anyone noticed me. I had to get out without Rami or Lucy knowing.

I yanked open the door to the back porch. Rami was waiting there.

“Good evening,” he greeted me in that slow, thoughtful drawl.

“Stay the fuck out of my head.”

“You know how it works, Benny Boy. I can’t ignore the loud thoughts. And you’ve been having some very loud thoughts lately.”

I stared down at my shoes, all black Adidas. Black is good. It doesn’t show stains. For example, purely hypothetically, splatters of human blood and organs. “I can make it quick. I can make it painless.”

Rami’s aura flared maroon; not enraged, no, not quite that, but certainly revolted. I was always finding new and horrifying ways to revolt them, whether I was trying to or not. “She has a family, Ben. A father. You know Chief Swan, you’ve seen him around town. He’s a good person. She’s a good person. You really want to do this? You really want to relapse like this?”

I didn’t reply. I didn’t have to. Hearing thoughts is a tricky thing, and not a gift that I would ever want; unspoken words are rarely a steam and usually a storm, disjointed and twisting, interrupting each other, bottomless layers of whispers and screams. But I was sure Rami could catch the important parts: that I didn’t know the difference between good and bad people, that I didn’t know what to think of people at all, that for me her blood was not a desire but a compulsion. I couldn’t stop envisioning it spilling over my tongue and teeth, down my throat, hot and pulsing erratically and fading. “Why can’t you hear her? Why can’t I see what she’s feeling?”

Rami shrugged, characteristically placid and restrained. It was maddening. “There are seven and a half billion people on this planet. So maybe every once in a while you get one that lives in our blind spots, there’s something chromosomal or psychological that puts them on a different frequency. I don’t know. How the hell should I know? All I know is that you definitely shouldn’t be seriously considering...well. What you’re considering.”

“Have you ever met someone whose thoughts you couldn’t hear before?”

“No,” Rami admitted; and was that a ghost of unease that crossed his face?

“Please, Rami. Let me go. Pretend you never saw me.” My words come out strained, hushed, like a spilled secret, like a confession. I’ve never wanted anyone’s blood like I want hers.

He heard that; I could see the dismay in his eyes. Now his aura is dark grey, almost black. Disappointment. Resignation. Mourning. “I told you what Lucy saw.”

“What she saw is impossible and you know it.”

Again, Rami shrugged. That blind, mindless faith. I wished I knew what it felt like. “She’s never wrong.”

“Have you told him?”

“Who, Joe?! Of course I haven’t told Joe. He...”

“He wouldn’t believe it either?” I snapped, like it was a victory.

“No,” Rami amended carefully. “No, he would believe anything Lucy saw.” Lucy had visions: flashes of the future, the past, the present. They were rare and unpredictable, often fragmented, snapshots rather than arcs. But they were always true. Or, rather, the other Lees claimed they were. The real Lees. “I don’t know what he would do about it,” Rami said finally. “So I’m waiting it out. And killing one of the primary participants is definitely not waiting it out.”

I seethed as I glared at him, hating him in that moment, hating myself only slightly more; and he heard that too. But then that wispy, fleeting haze around him was a pink like the last threads of sunlight sinking into the Western horizon. Forgiveness. Attachment. Love.

“Come with me, Ben,” Rami said gently, opening the door. “Come back inside. You can beat this. You’re better than this. You’re a good soul. You wouldn’t be with us if you weren’t.”

I tried to laugh. It came out like a snarl. “I haven’t had a soul in a long time.”

#joe mazzello fic #joe mazzelo x reader #borhap #borhap fic #borhap cast fic #twilight au #twilight #supernatural au

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kyn19 · 1 year

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my brother got married but more importantly my tits looked amazing

#was a private wedding so not allowed to post real photos #the bride (my sister-in-law??!?!!!?!) made that backdrop tho so that’s cool #me #selfie #your periodic reminder that i am beautiful and shameless

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thesirenchronicles · 3 years

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MARRIAGE RUNES

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Married SINCE: 21 May 2020 THE HUBBY: Mohctp MET: Eternity Ago

"Do you remember when Hades regained his memories?" Isabelle's voice was low as they looked into the fireplace. A mug of hot chocolate in both their grasp. Nodding, Magnus leaned back against the cushions. "Vividly, my dear. You all believed him to be a simple Shadowhunter until you sought out my help. Maryse's precious boy." Raising the mug to his lips, "How would your simple minds ever dream to understand that Alec was in reality Hades reincarnated. The true King of the Underworld." Shaking his head with a smirk pulling on the corners. "He was also a VERY pretty boy even then. I'd love to go back in time just to squeeze his ass when that confused expression appeared over his face." "Shameless." Isabelle laughed looking over at Magnus. A scoff passed his own lips, "Pot meet kettle. We are both black." Winking at her he looked down into his mug. Snapping his fingers a mist slowly drifted into the air before disappearing. The small bottle of Rum Chatta pouring into his own mug before floating over to Isabelle to do the same with hers. Taking another sip, he sighed with a smile "Much better." Looking up to Isabelle, "Where was I?" Thinking for a second, "Right, our pretty boy, Hades." Continuing despite the shake of Isabelle's head, "He was adamant that it was untrue. Believed that my knowledge and our past experiences was simply make believe to get into his head. Then, as days passed the memories resurfaced as you recall. Of the gods and souls, his dogs and his kingdom, of Persephone until finally... me." Leaning back into the couch, "I'll never forget the day, Hades fully accepted his true identity. Knew there was no coming back from the demons that were under his control and command. No longer the persecutor sent from the angels. But king of the darkness that he fought to destroy." His thumb rubbed the warm mug. "It was on that day that his memories of milleniums of love seeped past his mind. Pushing through the forefront with the darkness lingering behind... his lips touched mine on his own accord." Isabelle smiled softly at her brother-in-law, "You've loved him for a long time. What about Persephone? Hades steers clear of her in our converstations." "That I have, sweet Isabelle. That I have." Taking another drink, "He saved Persephone from an overbearing mother, and Zeus' dark desires. He loved her, yes. In a way. As a friend and a family member. But, IN LOVE with her? Knew that their souls were etched from the same stone? No. It wasn't until I walked into his life that we both connected the dots." Answering truthfully with a wave of his hand. "Asmodeus, as you know is my father. A Greater Demon, particularly a Prince of Hell, with the responsibilities of ruling his district. I forgot how long ago it was. Definately, just after the whole Lucifer-chucking from heaven that the Christian God did." Snapping his fingers again, the fire poker stoked the fire. "He took me unwillingly to pay our regards to the King. Let's just say the rest... was history." "Was it love at first sight?" Isabelle pried, completely comfortable in the lounger. Hades liked to keep his life on the upside and down below separated with only Magnus knowing both words. "You could say that. It was oh... an hour or two before we snuck away from the party. There was a dark room off the side of the throne room that I magiked. Deep blue linens that was almost black and the candelabras were a thing of beauty. Remind me to make you a set." Pointing at her before continuing, "His current form is his true form and just as chiseled as he is now. The room was dark with low lights. Sweat began to pool over his abdominal muscles. Our lips devoured the others as I had him bent down ov—" "MAGNUS!" The alarmed voice of Hades echoed loudly in their living room as he stood in the doorway with Jace, or was it Poseidon. Honestly? He couldn't keep track these days. Giving him an innocent smile with cat-like eyes, "Yes, dear?" NOTE FROM THE DESK OF MAGNUS BANE: Knowing how much of a stud his pet is and the crazy women that follow his tracks, Magnus has given Hades permission to have an open marriage. In other words, Hades can f*** whoever he desires as long as he returns to their home and bed every night. Where Magnus will proceed to erase any trace of them as he reclaims his pet... repetitively. Fuck that. He is mine. I'm not sharing. Period. (UNLESS--I approve of who I am lending him out to.)

#sirenmarriagerunes

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bobbyboops · 4 years

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Fluff Alphabet Challenge

First of all I guess I should introduce my mc!

Name: Ellie Addair

Age: 26

Ethnicity: Mom is American, father is Scottish.

Grew up in Los Angeles until age 10 then moved to London. Her mother is an actress, father works in film production.

Profession: Singer/songwriter

Lives in London

Love Interest: Bobby

fluff template

A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about the other?)

She loves his smile, it lights up the whole room, and he has the most infectious laughter. She will do anything to make him smile/laugh. He was the first boy she noticed as she walked out, she saw the smile and couldn't help herself. She was immediately drawn to him. She also loves his eyes and freckles. When they first met she found herself mapping all of his beautiful freckles, and got caught often. She was pretty shameless about it though.

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?).

Yes absolutely. She was an only child, and with two parents with very busy schedules she often found herself lonely. She always dreamed of having a big family, and she is extremely excited to start hers. That being said she is in no rush, she has a very demanding career herself, but when she finds the right person and they are both ready she will have no problem taking a step back. She is a talented songwriter and could easily make a living writing for others and take a break from touring. She wants at least 3 children, but could be persuaded to have 4.

C = Cuddle (How do they cuddle?)

Ellie is a huge cuddler, as previously stated she was often lonely growing up, so she always longed for the comfort of physical touch. She loves to be the little spoon, but doesn't mind being the big spoon on occasion. If they are on the couch together watching a movie she will always curl up on his lap or on his chest. Or she likes when he will lay his head on her lap, and she will stroke his head/ play with his hair. When he is in the kitchen baking, she will come up from behind and hold him and kiss between his shoulder blades. She is very physically affectionate.

D = Dates (What are dates with them like?)

Dates are usually not too extreme, she loves to plan something at home. She grew up in the spotlight, and knows how unforgiving it can be, so she doesn't love going out and having paps in her face and personal business. That doesn't mean she is boring though. She likes to have MasterChef competitions with Bobby, or cupcake wars. She will turn their backyard into a drive in movie theater, or turn the office into a ball pit. She is very creative!

E = Everything (You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…))

You are my sun, and my shelter. Ellie had gotten used to being the sun for everyone else, but Bobby had quickly shown her he was ready to be the sun for her too.

F = Feelings (When did they know they were in love?)

The moment she stepped out of the villa and saw his smile beaming back at her she knew she was in trouble, but when they were making out and found themselves on the ground and Bobby mentioned it being something to embarrass the grandkids with she knew for sure. Then when she was sent to hell aka casa she knew her life would always be brighter and happier with him in it.

G = Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how?)

Ellie is very gentle. Her friends always called her the mother hen of their friend group. She has such a sensitive and compassionate personality, and genuinely cares and worries about the people around her. She will go out of her way to make sure someone’s day is brighter. She is very socially aware, and can often read when people are struggling even when they don't say anything. When she notices someone having a bad day she will do anything to turn it around, usually with some form of humor. She has a hug and a listening ear at the ready always for anyone who needs it, or a joke ready if hugging isn't your thing.

H = Hands (How do they like to hold hands?)

Fingers intertwined, always. She never wants to let go.

I = Impression (What was their first impression?)

She walked out of the villa the breath caught in her chest, he was so beautiful to look at, and she immediately could feel he was such a warm soul. His smile was like being wrapped in a blanket fresh out of the dryer. Then when he spoke and made her laugh she knew no one else would compare to him. Her mind was made up immediately.

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous?)

I mean doesn't everyone get jealous to a certain extent? She is a pretty chill person for the most part, and if she is jealous she wont vocalize it. It will make her feel insecure more than anything but she is pretty quick to bounce back.

K = Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?)

Bobby technically initiated the first kiss during truth or dare, but she definitely took it further by kissing him back passionately. She initiated their real first kiss on the day beds. As I said she is very physically affectionate, and she wanted him to know she was serious about giving them a shot. She is a very intentional kisser, when she kisses you, it means something.

L = Love (Who says ‘I love you’ first?)

Bobby said that he loved her first, but she was so fast to return the sentiment its not even funny. She had been trying so hard to hold off saying it, because she knew deep down Bobby would want to say it first. So the moment it escaped his perfect lips she was ready.

M = Memory (What’s their favorite memory together?)

In the villa her favorite memory is the cake decorating, she loved seeing Bobby in action with his passion, and then eating the entire cake afterwards and seeing his face light up with happiness and admiration was *chefs kiss*.

Outside of the villa her favorite memory will be when Bobby proposes. She will remember it forever.

N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?)

Material things have never meant that much to Ellie, but with that being said if she sees something that reminds her of Bobby of course she will buy it! Her spoiling usually comes in the form of service, she is always doing little considerate things for Bobby.

O = Orange (What color reminds them of their other half

Yellow, he is her sun and her warmth. Everything about him screams yellow to her.

P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?)

Sugar Boo, cupcake, big man, or love.

Q = Quaint (What is their favorite non-modern thing?)

She has a music box that her parents got her for Christmas when she was 8. She listened to it for hours when she was little, and she still pulls it out when she is feeling anxious. She had a strong love for music from an early age, it was often her only companion. Music has a way of touching your soul that nothing else can really seem to do.

R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?)

She loves to curl up on the couch with her sugar boo and a warm blanket to watch a movie or read a book. Give the girl some candy and some popcorn and you are golden! She will sometimes pull Bobby out to dance in the rain though even though he claims to not like it, his face always lights up with childlike wonder.

S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?)

Listening to music and dancing will always make her feel better. She also will seek out Bobby’s companionship if he is home. He always knows how to calm her down and put a smile on her face. She will also cook or bake when she is sad or stressed. She always loved cooking growing up, and knows how to make some amazing comfort food!

T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?)

She loves talking period! She can sometimes be a little shy, but once she knows you and is comfortable with you she will talk to you about anything and everything. She can keep a conversation going, and loves to make people laugh. Her inner crack head will come out for sure once she trusts you so watch out!

U = Unencumbered (What helps them relax?)

Music and dancing! Cuddling, watching a movie, and eating comfort food! Bobby will always whip something up when he notices she is stressed out!

V = Vaunt (What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?)

Bobby of course, she knows sometimes people look at him and only see is clownery surface, but she is so proud of him and how hard he works to achieve his dreams! She also is very proud of her music, she writes new music daily, but she is a perfectionist, so she will only show off the music she is most excited about.

W = Wedding (When, how, where do they propose?)

Bobby proposed to Ellie after 8 months of dating, he couldn't help himself. He proposed at their home, but set up an entire scavenger hunt of their memories together. They got married a year after that.

X = Xylophone (What’s their song?)

Oh this one is hard! She has so many songs, depending on her mood!

Her song for Bobby: Lover by Taylor Swift or My person by Spencer Crandall

Her song for when she is sad: Inside out by Mokita. That song hits so personally.

Y = Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?)

Absolutely, she cant wait to get married and start a family.

Z = Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?)

Oh a dog for sure! Her and Bobby will probably get 2 rescue pups pretty soon after moving in together!

Sorry I am not a great writer, but this was so fun to do! I’m excited to see everyone else’s!

@ravena-dottir @kingkassam @bobbymckenziess @garyrennell @mrsgaryrennell

#litgbobby #litg #love island the game

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lansizhuis · 5 years

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WEILAN FIC REC

It's as the title says - the five times Shen Wei did a horny grip™ because let it be known that while Zhao Yunlan is explicitly shamelessly thirsty, Shen Wei is equally as thirsty but in a more lowkey manner. Oh, and of course, WeiLan as lesbians can't be passed up for this.(gift fic for taki who introduced the weilan lesbian agenda to me!)Hello! I finally had some time (spoiler: I actually didn’t but I can always have time for my dads) to properly make a compilation of WeiLan fanfic recommendations. I included some CN ones bc I absolutely love them to bits and pieces and some WeiLan derivatives bc why not.

Please click the kudos and leave a comment on the authors’ works to thank them and show your appreciation! <3 This will be updated periodically.

bc I’m shameless - imma shove my own weilan fics here

Title: Uhaw Summary: Shen Wei felt a smile on his face despite the seriousness of the situation. “Your loyalty will forever remain divided.” // “My loyalty is with you.” Zhao Yunlan declared. “Always has been, always will be.” [WEILAN MAFIA/GANGSTER AU 1/1] Notes: i was horny for weilan being horny for each other and being a power couple with some plot thrown in the mix im not sorry

Title: Devour Your God Summary: "The beast inside him howls and the inhumane thunderous chanting resounds in the beautiful ghost king. You remember don’t you? The more beautiful the ghost...the more terrifying."

[a look through shen wei's eyes as he goes through kunlun's multiple reincarnations until zhao yunlan; novel-compliant and shen san extra hints but should be spoiler free 1/1] Notes: sometimes we’re also sad in our weilan lives but do know they get their happy ending anyway

Title: Earlier On Summary: Zhao Yunlan starts remembering his life as Kunlun months after he first entered the world and his only clue resides on that creature (because his adult brain is now telling his baby brain that that wasn't a human) robed in white with a golden mask peering down on his crib. Notes: [novel-verse gift fic for orro AKA babey zhao yunlan having adult brain/memories who’s everyone’s source of headache]

Title: Five Times Shen Wei Did A Horny Grip Summary: It's as the title says - the five times Shen Wei did a horny grip™ because let it be known that while Zhao Yunlan is explicitly shamelessly thirsty, Shen Wei is equally as thirsty but in a more lowkey manner. Oh, and of course, WeiLan as lesbians can't be passed up for this. Notes: (gift fic for taki who introduced the weilan lesbian agenda to me!)

Title: Some Things Stay The Same and Some Don't Summary: “Xiao Wei,” Zhao Yunlan called in a serious voice making Shen Wei stiffen in attention, “Your boobs are actually big, aren’t they?” Shen Wei almost slipped from her position at the unexpected - or well, this is Zhao Yunlan so perhaps ‘expected’ should be the term - comment. “Yunlan, honestly!” “No really, it’s bigger than mine.” “Everyone’s bigger than your tiny mangoes, stupid owner.” Da Qing laughed from the kitchen. “I think even Lin Jing and Lao Chu have bigger ones compared to you.” Notes: lesbian!weilans part 2 for emmy featuring the primordial gods, shen wei + mama zhao interaction, and kunlun taking in 2 ghost queens instead of just one

Title: Repercussions of Meddling Summary: “You know what the diviner’s instructions were, right? Gather the hallows and let fate run its course or else there can be dire consequences.” Zhao Yunlan clenched his fist as he recalls Shen Wei’s hardships paralleled with Ye Zun’s loss of sanity, the ghost lovers’ fate in an effort to protect him, the brewing war as the vision the hallows have given him on their deaths, and an ever burning flame on his soul as he watched Shen Wei disappear stay clear.“There can’t be anything more dire than that future.” The two leaders looked at each other meaningfully. “And if the bulk of the repercussions on you twisting the timeline falls on you?” Zhao Yunlan huffed in amusement and flipped his long hair to his back. “If I'm the one who has to pay then so be it.” Notes: aka ye zun is a bad influence to shen wei and add that in for 10,000 years where they're both awake, alive, and together waiting for a certain someone's reappearance in their lives --- THIS CAN GET DARK; drama canon divergence au where zhao yunlan as kunlun ends up saving ye zun in the past and meddling with time

Title: A Path Back Home Summary: The Dixing kingdom's delegation set off for a peace treaty with the kingdom of Haixing as new tides of the world was coming. For some, this was a turning point for the three kingdoms. For Ye Zun and his father, this was a chance to bring back their two other family members home with them. The past retains its stories and secrets, the present shakes the foundations of everyone's belief, and the future is a path back home. (read a/n before reading!) Notes: weilan royalty a/b/o au aka the most self-indulgent fic (it wasn’t supposed to be multi-chap but brain said ‘world building’ and now i suffer)

Title: where everything converges Summary: collection for weilan week prompts - day 1: beginnings (SID+SW meets the youngest primordial god) day 3: au (tgcf au of god!ZYL and ghost king!SW) day 7: anniversary (there will come a day where SW wakes up to the 5,000 years and 1 day of being with ZYL)

Title: in all worlds and in all timelines Summary: collection of weilan prompts (do send some and i’ll see if i can write it!)

Title: The Power of Words Summary: “You have lived for as long as I have and so you must know that words have power. The likes of old sayings and proverbs hold a decree to them the longer it’s passed around from one breathing soul to another. They become entities and binding spells on their own through time.”

“What has that got to do with anything right now? Ghost Slayer, you are already treading a dangerous path with the choices you have made the past months. Do I still need to remind you of this?” the spirit asked.

The black robed creature acted as if he didn’t hear his companion and spoke once more. “I suppose it doesn’t matter right as of this moment,” he crossed his legs and continued, “Let me tell you a story; a secret.” Notes: it was supposed to be a oneshot but my need for novel shen wei characterization bled through so now it’s a 3shot *sigh*

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Title: 狗在江湖 Notes: this is a mix of novel and drama elements AND it’s a/b/o AND it has 30 chapters so obv i cried

Title: Sweet Dreams Summary: 朱白ABO，架空末世微悬疑。 Notes: okay so it was weird for me at first bc they were using zhubai’s names until i realized they were pertaining to weilan derivative in general AND OKAY LISTEN - the plot??? THE PLOT??? GLORIOUS

Title: 我说所有的酒都不如你 Summary: 这大概是一个东江二哈狼和东江气死猫你追我跑你继续追我假装跑你拼命追我跑不动了的爱情故事（。 Notes: 2Luo aka Luo Fusheng x Luo Fei weilan derivative and this is legit my favorite derivative fic!!! they mixed both dramas and fed me sentinel + guide trope AND THEN WOW PLOT

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Title: Black Cloak Reversed Summary: Chief Zhao is a little too friendly with the Black-Cloaked Envoy. The members of the SID worry that he's being emotionally disloyal to Professor Shen. Notes: drama; zhao yunlan is a filthy, thirsty man and SID mourns over this fact

Title: my heart broke loose on the wind Summary: If Yunlan is going to learn how to make actual food that requires more effort than just boiling water and putting hot water into stuff, he’s going to have to take all the notes. “Right,” he says to himself. “How hard can it be?” He watches all twenty-two minutes and fourteen seconds of Chef Shen's video without fast-forwarding. When it comes to an end, he clicks on the replay button. He ends up taking zero notes, and the only thing he manages to learn from the whole exercise is that Chef Shen -Shen Wei- is really fucking beautiful when he smiles. Notes: au; alternative summary - ye zun: how thirsty are you for my bro zhao yunlan: thirsty? pls im a paragon of all things holy, i am a kind and generous citizen of the world, i am - ye zun: i can help you get in his pants zhao yunlan: - thirsty af; i am very thirsty

Title: when we reunite, the world will tilt on its axis Summary: Zhao Yunlan tries to figure out how he should approach the matter of young Shen Wei. Notes: drama; babey!shen wei who's so earnest and genuinely in-love ahhh im soft

Title: Wild Thing, Stop Your Teasing Summary: Shen Wei’s eyelid twitch as Yunlan unwraps another lollipop, closes his spit-shiny lips around the spherical head while looking at Shen Wei under dark eyes and thick lashes. Fists clenched on his pant leg, Shen Wei swallows and tamps down the urge to grab Yunlan across the table. Notes: drama; when you think zhao yunlan's thirst has a limit - he goes an open his mouth but hey shen wei's head over heels thousands of years ago already anyway

Title: Tease the Wild Thing Summary: Yunlan's POV from shaenanigans' awesome fic ''Wild Thing, Stop your Teasing''. Yeah, it's the one with the lollipops, and the porn with feels. You know. The Good Stuff. Notes: more weilan smut after the one above?? SIGN ME TF UP

Title: without complexities or pride Summary: “Kunlun Hall’s rules do not apply to you,” Yunlan says simply, moving to steep some tea for Shen Wei. “You are the Black Cloak Envoy. Lord Kunlun holds you in high regard.” “And you hold him in high regard,” Shen Wei adds before he’s able to stop himself. Shen Wei can hear the wretched jealousy in his own voice, and no doubt Yunlan can as well, because Yunlan’s smile turns sly, and his eyes are very knowing when he says, “In a way, I suppose I do.” Notes: (Or, the Not-Exactly-A-Courtesan!Yunlan fic.) >> im crying bc YES

Title: Every ridge hand-picked by the late sun’s slant light Summary: Zhao Yunlan gets up to greet this man, his destiny – who is currently scowling behind his fancy embroidered mask – and smiles as filthily as he can make it. Whatever else they might be to each other, Shen Wei has been taunting him for weeks. Zhao Yunlan is going to take him home and fuck him until he cries and he wants Shen Wei to know that. “Long time, no see,” he says. The Black Cloaked Envoy blanches. Notes: when i say i thirst for weilan papapa where shen wei loses his self control - I MEAN IT

Title: that's where you belong Summary: First of all, how dare Shen Wei. Second of all, Zhao Yunlan has been looking forward to this for like, as long as he's been aware that Shen Wei is an alpha. Third of all -- Notes: im crying bc all i ever wanted was for novel weilan's characterization bc i know their papapa would be the hottest with that and i have been fed with this need and even partnered w/ a/b/o trope /SOBS

Title: Just Cared Too Much Summary: Zhao Yun Lan found out his father was dead while he was pouring concrete down the throat of a backstabbing dickbag. “Chief, I'm sorry, the Boss is gone. Shot to the head, on his way to meet the Russians.” Notes: i was dying to have a mafia au and this appeared THANK YOU; and def one of the other things that pushed me to finish my own mafia au for weilan lol

Title: 家教 - or - Domestic Education Summary: Shen Wei is the Ghost King, born out of the unyielding chaos of entropy that had consumed the underworld before the creation of the wheel of reincarnation. He's the cosmic guardian of death and all her darlings, and the universe through the lens of his eye is rife with demons, hungry ghosts, and shadows creeping out of their places. So there is absolutely no way he is getting sick. Notes: im novel verse trash and we get that PLUS mama!zhao uhh hell yes???

Title: Sarva Summary: Or, 一切. At work, in public, Shen Wei is meticulously, seamlessly polite. In bed, he's something else. Notes: this was the first weilan smut i read AND ALL THE YES BC SHEN WEI LOSING IT FOR ZHAO YUNLAN IS MY KINK

Title: Future Forged Summary: Masquerading as Kunlun, Zhao Yunlan sets out on a mission to recover the stolen Hallows alongside the young Shen Wei. Along the way, he discovers new abilities, forges new bonds, unearths old histories, and learns that the universe goes beyond his wildest imagination. Notes: lol way better take on what happened during that time travel thing than what the drama had

Title: who you allow Summary: But then Zhao Yunlan goes and gets a haircut, and Shen Wei. Pouts. For like three days. Notes: for the record - i, too, believe shen wei will pout bc of this

Title: Significant Other Colour Summary: Collars are so old-fashioned and Zhao Yunlan can’t help but feel that there’s an ulterior motive hiding behind Shen Wei’s innocently widened eyes. Notes: tfw i've tried to bury my needs on acknowledging how shen wei canonically wants to lock up zhao yunlan and then this fic hits me - author pls let me love you (for y'all heed the warnings)

Title: Afterimage Summary: Zhu Yi Long is an awkward turtle. Now he has to deal with letting Shen Wei and Ye Zun go. Notes: okay so im not really into fics on real people but this was done so well? it explores the effects of zhu yilong's method acting and sets straight that zhubai and weilan are not one and the same at the end of the day

Title: Twill Seeker Summary: The young master has a thing for the butler. The butler is at the end of his rope. Notes: if anyone comes after me and my apparent need for butler shen wei and young master zhao yunlan, hide me

Title: When You're Old, You Want To Celebrate Birthdays At Home Summary: Shen Wei comes home to a surprise. Notes: me, wiping a tear: oh look, a ye zun characterization i actually like even if he's mentioned only

Title: do nothing day Summary: “The stress of work is exhausting me and my wife is scolding me now,” Zhao Yunlan pretends to whine, hiding his face in the blankets. “You’ve seen who I work with, those stubborn kids who cause me nothing but trouble. You’re supposed to be on my side, meant to pity me when the world turns against me. I deserve this day off and I reserve the right to do as I please. And if I want to be a slug in the bed then that’s what I’m going to do.” Notes: "It’s so gentle that Shen Wei almost can’t stand it, the way Zhao Yunlan lets him do as he likes, just receiving whatever Shen Wei wants to give him. And there’s so much that Shen Wei wants to lavish onto his Zhao Yunlan." -- dont bother for the ambulance i know im DOA

Title: Heat and Desire Summary: Five times Zhao Yunlan had an oral fixation and one time Shen Wei did something about it. Notes: "You tease me, Zhao Yunlan," Shen Wei whispers, his breath tickling against Zhao Yunlan’s ear. "You tease me and you tease me and you seem to think that I won't do anything about it." -- me, choking: IM FINE

Title: Just A Phone Call Away Summary: Chief Zhao gets hurt on a case and nobody wants to be the one to call Professor Shen and tell him.... Notes: SID family + shen wei's first reaction to the call??? sign me up

Title: Never Losing You Summary: Yunlan can't open his eyes, can't shut his mouth. Needy, keening noises pour out of his throat completely out of his control. Shen Wei's closed fist is around him, pumping fast and tight in rhythm to his fucking, making him see stars exploding behind closed eyelids, thoroughly engulfed by the incredible sensations racketing up and down his spine originating from where they're so deliciously joined. Shen Wei's other hand cradles his jaw, careful, reverent, but also serves to ground Yunlan to the bed so Shen Wei can fuck him harder, deeper. Notes: i can never have enough weilan papapa bc if canon doesn't give me the explicit juicy details then im turning to fic writers with metaphorical gold payment

Title: third time's the charm Summary: “I’m what Da Qing likes to describe as ‘especially tenacious’ when I’m in heat, even more so when I have a specific Alpha in mind,” Yunlan tells him, casual. (Or, three times Shen Wei helps Zhao Yunlan through his heat.) Notes: me, looking through the window with a faraway look: a/b/o universe makes me weak even if it's not even explicit

Title: this secret language that we speak Summary: "If you don't want to do this any more," says Shen Wei, "you get off the couch, and we'll do whatever you want. Do you understand?" Zhao Yunlan is so hot he thinks he's going to light the couch on fire. He swallows and nods."I didn't hear you," says Shen Wei, implacable as death. "Do you understand?" Zhao Yunlan has to clear his throat, and when he manages to speak, his voice is gravelled with arousal. "Yeah. I do." "Good," says Shen Wei. Notes: i cried 69 times bc my horny ass is fed and jfc domineering shen wei??? *cries for the 70th time*

Title: Shen Wei Summary: Shen Wei loves Zhao Yunlan, and there is only so long he can feign otherwise. Notes: [Zhao Yunlan gives a small shrug, uninvested in the argument. “All right. And where do you belong?” Shen Wei freezes, flashes of memory assaulting him, of Kunlun’s skin hot against his, of promises moaned against each other’s necks. Inside you is all he can think.] BINCH I DIED AT THIS PART

Title: Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This Summary: Zhao Yunlan jerks back to the waking world gasping and screaming and drowning in the anguish that comes with being lit on eternal consuming fire. The unmistakable rich copper taste of blood fills his mouth and he opens tear-filled bloodshot eyes that he was sure melted a long time ago with the rest of his physical body. He sees faces crowding around him in varying degrees of worry, but the pain blinds him from putting names to the faces. His throat feels raw, as if he'd been screaming for centuries and realizes on the next breath that he's been screaming a name. Shen Wei's name. Notes: drama-verse but a hopeful one TYL im here for the whole the last episode didn’t happen bc we can use the plot that the drama threw away lol

Title: Aftermath Summary: The fallout after the dust has settled. Notes: a look on what happened after the 4th extra in the novel; s o f t

Title: The world that we'll invent Summary: Shen Wei's self-control continues to be tested. Notes: [Nothing in Shen Wei's long existence has prepared him for the problem that is Zhao Yunlan.] >> honestly this is the summary of weilan in general

Title: Quiet Heart, Hollow Body Summary: It has been ten thousand years since Shen Wei met Kunlun, but he could never forget the one who first saw beyond the mask of the Black Cloaked Envoy to the person beneath. Notes: im novel bias for so many reasons but this was absolutely amazing as a drama setting bc it /is/ closer to the novel setting bc shen wei was actually awake those 10,000 years so that desperation and intensity of novel!sw is closer here - really great read

last updated: March 2, 2020

#weilan #shen wei #zhao yunlan #zhenhun #镇魂 #guardian #zhinfo

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bartsugsy · 7 years

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then why would you want aaron to be with him? or do you not like aaron either?

Aksjsjsks oh u know me anon, a true aaron hater 😂😂😂

im dying

WELCOME TO MY TEDX TALK TBQH HERE WE GO

i think, i mean first of all, aaron obviously loves and wants to be with robert, but can’t be at the moment because there’s a baby and also tbh because robert needs to get his god damn shit together

aaron… clearly doesn’t care that much about the immorality behind the shit robert pulls. aaron’s morals are sort of just as fucked up - in mean, they met THROUGH CRIME. they’re both sort of awful. rob is a lot more shameless about it but aaron robbed home farm and kidnapped lachlan all by himself, for instance 😂 he’s a true dingle, that one. since they got back together, aaron’s concerns have usually been, in canon, more along the lines of: pls don’t let robert put himself in jail and also does robert love me enough

on the first point, see: ssw and “i could lose you”, the police questioning rob about withdrawing the money to pay ryan, the argument over breaking lucky out of jail.

on the second: everything about the rebecca saga - i think aaron actually understood that rob was using her for her connection to the whites and the chance to get some more money (see: the talk in the back room after finding out about the kiss) but that didn’t stop him from feeling uncomfortable about it and so the question was always this awful mix of - does he love me enough to stay faithful and does he love me more than he loves money and scheming?

and that’s been the sticking point. canon has shown robert actively dropping scheming with rebecca/making money for aaron (aaron’s birthday) and also obviously there was that whole BURNING 10K thing smh - robert does love aaron more than he loves money and power but at the same time, oh boy does he love money and power! and he makes some fucked up choices around them.

the actual issue of why they broke up is more around obviously rob knocking up rebecca - which happened more because rob was genuinely angry at aaron, angrier than he’d been in such a long time. i’ve spoken about this so many times, but as far as robert was aware at that moment, he’d spent all this time struggling without aaron, unable to sleep, pouring money into a lawyer to try and get him out early and here’s aaron, disregarding all of that, taking drugs and threatening his chances of early release

and aaron going to prison? that’s something aaron did by himself (and ok also finn) that hurt robert and liv. a lot. that’s something that affected them both horrendously that was aaron’s fault. i have a friend whose dad punched someone at work which led to him getting fired and his mum literally up and left him - that level of violence against others really can break up relationships. aaron put someone in hospital and went to prison for it and robert chose to stay and didn’t hold it against aaron - until that one moment of weakness, where everything was a little too much, and he allowed himself to really be angry at aaron for putting them in that situation - and he fucked up massively. because he’s an idiot. and also probably because he has some issues around putting aaron on a pedestal sometimes and seeing aaron itching for more spice and being really very, horribly, awfully human was very very difficult for robert at that moment.

like. aaron put someone in hospital and robert barely said a word to aaron about it. that’s insane. and mirrored in a lot of ways in aaron’s initial reaction to staying with robert after the reveal and finding out about the baby. they both have the worst communication issues and also they are both so desperate to stay with each other that they overlook things that need to be talked about and dealt with. and that’s what’s been getting them in trouble since the moment they got together properly.

anyway, i’m literally more sympathetic towards the ons than i am basically anything else robert has ever done e v e r, which is ironic because that’s the one thing that fucked up robert’s life and ultimately pushed aaron away.

and ok let’s look at what aaron knew, from his side, that was expressed in canon, in the most simplistic form we can:

robert was angry at aaron for taking spice and slept with rebecca to hurt him, regrets it massivelyrebecca is now pregnant and not getting rid of the baby and also not leaving the village or going anywhere robert doesn’t want the baby but also is sort of fucked up about itaaron wants to be with robertaaron thinks robert would be a good dadaaron wants robert to spend time with his child if that’s what robert wants (because he very much loves robert)aaron doesn’t want rebecca to spend time with robert and does not know how to handle the fact that the baby is a reason why that has to happenin fact, rebecca being around is a constant reminder of the worst parts of robert and all those parts that he gave into earlier this yearand she has clearly expressed to aaron that she wanted to steal robert from him aaron has no real reason to trust that robert wouldn’t end up with rebecca despite everything because aaron is only human and its natural to be insecure about ur partner spending time with an ex who they kissed and also slept with in the last yearaaron wants to believe that robert only wants himaaron pushed most of that resentment on rebecca moreso than robert because that was an easier option for himultimately, he also resents robert and it doesn’t take much pushing for him to take that anger out on robert as well as rebecca, with almost deadly consequencesthe whole situation, likely in conjunction with the fact that he’s already experienced a lot of trauma earlier that year in prison which we are reminded of with the jason call back when aaron tries to buy spice again, is horrific for aaron’s mental healthaaron removes himself from the situation - both because he himself is struggling and because he almost killed robert - he says that he doesn’t need this and neither does robert.

i know i’ve seen a lot of people say that robert was the one who was bad for his mental health but it was so so so much more the situation as a whole than it was robert - and the situation was borne out of robert’s horrible decisions and god damn is that why robert needs to sort himself out and stop making horrible decisions on impulse whenever he’s feeling emotions that are hard to handle

- aaron needed to do it, because aaron was in a place where he was reacting with dangerous levels of violence every time he was upset at or about robert

and now robert needs to do it, because…. well, look at the little fucker, throwing himself into getting control of home farm as if that’s going to fill the emptiness in his chest, without any regard for anyone else’s safety or feelings. it’s a miracle no one has died yet (again) as a result of robert’s recklessness and carelessness over the lives of other people - and there have been enough close calls. this isn’t like… a cry of help to aaron though? this isn’t about rob trying to get aaron back lmao. it’s about him thinking he’s lost aaron for good and so deciding to do exactly what he was doing before aaron came along - which was slowly getting home farm and all the money and power that comes along with it. only this time, he’s acting almost deranged, because… well, he’s having a breakdown isn’t he?

for aaron and robert to get back together, aaron needs to continue to be in a place where he won’t resort to violence and robert needs to wake up and realise that being careless about people’s lives and doing what he’s been doing etc etc isn’t a good way to live + whatever else they’re gonna have him face up to lmao

but like? if robert stops being a dick and chasing after money and power at the expense of all the good things in his life (which - if anything could ever teach him that that’s not as emotionally fulfilling a way to live as being with your family and the man you love, i feel like this situation might)? i don’t see why aaron wouldn’t be happy with robert? they’re in love with one another and people can change and better themselves and lbr aaron literally said himself that he still thinks of himself as being in a relationship with rob because emotionally they’re both totally committed to one another.

robert may be a terrible human but he loves aaron and he’s spent a lot of time trying to be better for aaron - he’s saved aaron’s life over and over, is someone aaron wants to spend the rest of his life with, is someone aaron slips work to spend his entire day with, makes aaron laugh, loves aaron’s sister, someone who decorated an entire insane and beautiful house for them to live in, is someone who couldn’t sleep in their bed without aaron in it, someone who thinks that aaron is beautiful inside and out, someone who threw a surprise wedding for aaron because he was panicking about going to prison and needed something to ground him a little, someone who devoted all of his time and energy to supporting aaron through one of the toughest fucking periods of aaron’s life without asking or needing anything in return

robert is awful to most people but most of the time he tries like hell to be the best he can be to aaron and most of the time? he succeeds

sometimes he doesn’t and those are the moments where we internally slap him upside the head but like… that’s also how relationships work, usually

(but also thank christ rob is getting the redemption coma or whatever bc he needs it)

and aaron loves him back - even after everything, aaron defends robert to people, he truly believes in the best parts of robert because he’s seen them, as well as the worst parts - and he’s forgiven the worst parts because that’s what aaron does and that’s not a bad thing or a weakness or something he needs to be gently pushed out of, that’s a beautiful quality in a human being tbh fuck everyone who doesn’t appreciate and respect aaron’s capacity to forgive whilst still sticking up for himself and making sure no one walks over him, because he absolutely would never let anyone walk over him, not even robert - aaron knows his own mind and his own heart and he’s going to do whatever he’s going to do, fuck what anyone else thinks and if that means believing that robert is deserving of his forgiveness, i don’t think that’s something that makes him weak nor is it necessarily even something that takes something away from aaron, that’s hard for him to do or makes him lesser in any way. idk i’m a forgiving person and i get how against the odds easy that can be sometimes, even if it’s not necessarily the best idea always 😂

IM GETTING OFF TRACK BASICALLY AARON LOVES ROBERT AND ROBERT LOVES AARON AND THAT WASNT ENOUGH FOR THEM THIS YEAR - EVERYTHING IMPLODED AND SOMETIMES IT WAS AARON’S FAULT, MORE OFTEN IT WAS ROB’S FAULT AND GOD SOMETIMES IT WAS THE WORLD JUST BEING RELENTLESSLY SHITTY TO THEM AND PILING ON SOME MORE PAIN

BUT WANTING AARON TO BE WITH ROBERT IS NEVER NECESSARILY AS SIMPLE AS “I DISREGARD AARON’S FEELINGS IN FAVOUR OF ROBERT’S” BECAUSE I SECRETLY HATE AARON, BECAUSE TO ME, AARON’S FEELINGS ARE ALWAYS INEVITABLY GOING TO BUILD BACK UP TO WANTING TO BE WITH ROBERT

AND I HAVE A LOT OF RESPECT FOR AARON’S FEELINGS HENCE THE JUSTICE FOR AARON’S FEELINGS 2K17 MOVEMENT THAT I KEEP HAVING TO BRING OUT

but it’s just that that decision to be together again doesn’t necessarily have to turn into the hell that 2017 was for them both

🤷🏻‍♀️ they can be better than that and they can genuinely make one another happy - they just need a better run at it, with less awful impulses towards violence or infidelity or what have you

(and also it’s a soap and their relationship is hella entertaining)

#long post #....no one is gonna read that question and not anticipate having to scroll for their life right #THIS TURNED INTO A RAMBLING MESS IM SORRY IM SICK RN #IM NOT ON MY A GAME #meta #answering anons

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