#your whole life

[holygeist]

are you ever dysphoric of just your entire being

#your whole life

[disc80s]

#is being predisposed to having depression/general feeling of sadness through your whole life an actual thing? #or do I just have undiagnosed high functioning depression #txt

[greelin]

people when trauma victims act traumatized especially in a way that is unpalatable to them because it involves lashing out and unpredictable moods and having boundary issues rather than just being demure, sad, and consumable

#the surprise at unpredictability is always so fucking baffling to me. this is someone who’s been under extreme stress/duress #for ages. Do you think you can just bounce back. regulate everything immediately. when you’ve been in Survival Mode your whole #fucking life. LOL #you don’t just fucking Know how to be a human being. magically. because you’re out of the situation now. like.

[deimosatellite]

o yea bird guy

#that made me laugh so much ty luffy #imagine ur law and ur beefing w this guy your whole life and luffy goes ''o yea bird guy" #one piece #almost to dressrosa im on the last few eps of punk hazard now #monkey d luffy #trafalgar law #donquixote doflamingo

[catmask]

with that said there are characters that a fat maybe not canonically but they are spiritually. to me. they may not be drawn that way but i know whats true. ive seen it like a sort of prophet

#serizawa. send post #he did NOT live his life as a shut in for almost a whole decade to be drawn SKINNY! not by me at least #also like so many characters over the age of 30. no more fit moms and dads GIVE them that divorce body fat NOW! #*strikes you down with the force of god* #but honestly alternative for serizawa that ive always liked is that he gains weight when he starts working for reigen #because he can now go out and eat new foods :D he has actually gained an appetite because he's moving around more #and isnt just eating like instant ramen or whatever his mom brings him #see how easy it is you can just believe it with your heart. you just have to find the ways to make true waht u know #scratchpost #txt

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[fearless-franklin]

“You can’t spend your whole life taking on other people’s unhappiness”

#me #mine #personal #unhappiness #live for yourself #live for your own happiness #happiness #your whole life #music #soundcloud #underrated fire #everything music #hip hop #rap #deep #r&b #quotes #alternative #indie #love

[queerbaitesque]

#when you spend your whole life underground and miss the new genders #knights of sidonia #kos lb

[kedreeva]

uh, okay. i'm very scared to ask but : rabbit that's not really a rabbit...?

yeah, there's, like. a small god, shaped like a rabbit, that lives in my yard. I would say it's a normal rabbit except it's not. It won't move from my driveway if I'm trying to drive out and it was there first. I can walk up within a few feet of it, and it will turn and just look at me like what do you want? It's the only rabbit that freaks the hell out of all my birds, they CANNOT be directed or communicated with when this rabbit comes around, they will do nothing but stand on alert and stare at it making a soft warning call. I've caught it SEVERAL times now standing nose to nose with one of my peacocks, and it just looks at me and walks away when I catch them. hawks and falcons and eagles and owls constantly pass over my yard, and it is full of rabbits that do not hide from them, and I've never seen evidence of one being taken. You know the moment you walk into a very dark room and maybe it's a room you've been in before and maybe you don't believe in ghosts, but also it's still dark and your little leftover lizard hindbrain goes "anything could be inside of here waiting for me" the second before you turn on the light? It's like that feeling, except in the shape of a rabbit. i didn't ask for any of that.

#rabbits #asks #anon asks #horror #it's not like I'm going to kick it out #but that rabbit is absolutely not my business #the studio ghibli effect where your whole body fluffs up in fear #is what i wish I could do when I realize oh It's You again #stories about ked's life

[birdantlers]

Dende no La Croix

PART 2

#imagine not having carbonation for your whole life and then drinking it #dbz #dende #gohan #dragonball #dragon ball z #dbz memes #piccolo #piccolo dbz #piccolo jr #namekian #dende dbz #dragon ball #skart

[roach-works]

i think some people got the wrong message after watching every movie where mean bullies call the quirky but ultimately loveable protagonist a "freak"

calling people freaks isn't bad just because sometimes you're wrong and that weird girl was actually very nice and saved everyone at prom from a mummy's curse.

calling people freaks is bad because dividing the world into "good people who are normal" and "bad people who are abnormal" makes you a tedious goddamn asshole

#freaks aren't bad you're just too fragile to handle the beautiful complexity of the real world #and you will spend your whole life being a huge jerk to people who don't deserve the deeply annoying ordeal of having met you #or you could maybe hold an earthworm in your hand for awhile and get over it

[cracklewink]

Part 4/5 of my MLP Infection AU!!

This was the part I was most excited for, I literally drew this whole thing just to explain my fan pony species lol

#mlp #mlp infection au #my little pony #mlp horror #mlp fim #sunset shimmer #zecora #This whole time I was like I have to get through this. to draw MONSTER PONIES #Sleigh ponies can have anywhere from 4-8 legs #Also can have doubled ears and double or even triple tails #They also have the split pupils and a rainbow hair streak #Unicorns can get split horns and pegasi (or alicorns) can get multiple wings #be rough if you end up with an uneven number. LOL #No rougher than eating meat for the rest of your life when you were previously a grass-eating horse though #I tried coming up w cool name for the vaccine so its HPE as in “Hope”

[luxlightly]

I don't know how to break it to you all but a bad parent will parent badly with books and a good parent will parent well with an iPad.

Ipads don't make the "ipad kid". What upsets you is a child who is being given something distracting and potentially obnoxious to those around them so that the parent doesn't have to deal with engaging with their child. And it's not new.

I grew up before the invention of the ipad and the complaints were the same. It was "tv kids" and "Gameboy kids". And it was book kids too, though people rarely complained about those kids because it didn't make noise and bother them personally so they no longer cared. Because the "it's for the good of the child!" argument dried up real fast as soon as it was something that didn't affect them.

A good parent who is engaging with their child's interests can do so with an iPad or television. A bad parent can say "take this and leave me alone" with a book or a toy. The problem is that some kids were raised by objects. By whatever kept them busy and entertained and away from their parents. Sure, there are parents who need to realize that's what they're doing and would benefit from changing their parenting style by limiting electronics use, but "if you give your kid an electronic toy, it means you're a bad parent" is not the same thing and largely misses the actual source of the problem.

Your arbitrary standards of what "good children" doing "good child activities" is as restricting.

#it's exhausting to hear the same argument over and over your whole life #changed to meet the times #wherever was last demonized is now the good thing #and whatever's new is bad #and ten years from now that bad thing will be the wholesome old favorite from when times were simple

[bananasmores]

loud

#g4 applejack #autumn blaze #traditional 4am queue upload. as is tradition. #Hi. Don't google 'snake pits' trying to get reference pictures of the holes on snake snouts #because it pulls up pictures of huge holes with the most snakes you've seen in your whole life. Thank you.

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

It’s not that Jason forgot, per se.

But between smuggling a toddler out of the League of Assassins, trekking halfway across the world, and finding a suitable hiding place that’s also child friendly… well, it kind of slipped his mind that he’s supposed to be… dead.

Something that comes back to bite him in the ass when he takes Dami out for some ice cream and just so happens to run into non other than Brucie-fucking-Wayne

#look I’ve found a new fave trope and it’s Brucie Wayne having to keep up his act while internally LOSING HIS SHIT #Jason isn’t very into the whole revenge thing here #his mind is 85 parts ‘keep Dami safe’ 5 parts ‘kill joker asap’ and 10 parts ‘avoid bats at any cost’ #Jason doesn’t know who Damian’s father is #dealer’s choice if Jason establishes himself as Dami’s dad or older brother #his build certainly makes him look old enough #if you don’t look at his baby face lol #Jason runs into Brucie and goes straight into survival mode #Damian who is very observant for a toddler immediately clocks Brucie as THREAT based on Jason’s reaction #Brucie blue screens and desperately tries not to lose Jason in the crowd #jason is absolutely trying to lose Brucie in the crowd #while clutching Damian like his life depends on it #for all he knows it does #the visceral terror that your pseudo dad will take away your little brother/baby #Bruce who just wants to know if he’s hallucinating again: W A I T #jason who is terrified of being put in Arkham for killing people: no FUCKING WAY #hm maybe Jason plays the ‘I’m not Jason’ game again #it’s not gonna hold for long #but Bruce absolutely thinks that Damian is Jason’s bio child for a while and he’s on the WARPATH #Jason was sixteen when he died and never showed any interest in dating so literally every red flag is waving in brucie’s mind simultaneousl #or maybe Jason manages to get away and all Brucie is left with is the memory of his supposedly dead son #running away from him #and clutching a tiny kid #prompts #jason todd #batfamily #Damian wayne #batdad #brucie wayne

[reasonsforhope]

You don't need to believe that people as a whole are good or well-intentioned to be an optimist about fixing climate change.

A lot of the time, it's enough to trust in this: people hate being screwed over. And even more than that, they hate feeling screwed over.

Climate change is actively screwing over almost every single person on this planet, whether they know it or not. We just need to keep making sure that people do know that they're getting screwed over, along with all their loved ones, and who's doing it.

Spite and righteous anger will honestly do a lot of the rest.

#hope #good news #hope posting #climate change #climate optimism #life #not news #advice #me #human nature #like. obviously this is imho. but also I'm genuinely convinced that I'm right #spite and anger are powerful motivators #there are scientists who argue that anger's whole evolutionary purpose #is to keep us from being screwed over #because that's so vital to our survival #and what's more vital to our survival than a liveable planet??? #channel your anger into action #do not let anyone tell you that optimism or being an activist or being part of a healthy community means never being angry #that is so so untrue #and if you find a way to channel your anger and pain and grief to do GOOD in the world #to help people #then that will also do a lot to stop your emotions from eating you up inside #hopepunk #anger #spite #optimism #hopeposting #humanity