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tojipie · 6 months

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welcome home <3

he’s unboxed ! who cheered. by far one of my most requested fics of all time. started this series 6 months ago and it remains one of my favs :,) this is by no means the end though ! i haven’t been writing any of the additions to this series in “order” and i am still 100% open to writing about his life inside/after prison lol. thank u to all the lovely ppl that have been showing love to these since april mwah mwah mwah mwah

as always, prison bf toji series linked here <3

content: (incarceration, fem reader, fluff, hurt/comfort, p in v smut, pining, road head, swallowing, creampie, dirty talk, multiple rounds)

“just step through here and—yep,” the guard waves his security want across your outstretched arms, clearing you to take your belongings from the conveyor belt.

you’d done this dance a hundred times over the past seven years, driving up to the district penitentiary twice a week to see your boyfriend—now fiancé.

toji told you he didn’t have it in him to wait, popping the question during a conjugal visit a month ago.

the man had known he’d wanted to marry you even before he got locked up. the feeling was mutual, but unspoken, always hanging in the air between the two of you.

you on the other hand had known you wanted to marry toji the moment he whispered his first “i love you,” said to you through the crackly speaker of a burner phone on a night when neither of you knew if he’d be coming home or not.

you make a beeline for the release wing, breaking into a subtle jog without drawing too much attention to yourself. the bouquet of green flowers you’d bought at the grocery store jostles in your purse, leaving a breadcrumb trail of stray petals.

there, around a bend and down the corridor stands the man of your dreams, flanked by officers and personnel at the front desk.

metal cuffs clack together as the man reaches to accept a clipboard from the release agent, skillfully uncapping the pen with his teeth to fill out the means for his freedom.

he looks up a split second before you speak, dropping the clipboard with an audible clatter. toji tears down the corridor with a look that speaks of relief beyond words.

“toji!” you yell, sprinting to the inmate with outstretched arms. you nearly trip over your own feet with how quick you barrel towards him.

warm bodies clash together at last, squeezing, cradling, and caressing every inch of each other at last. his law enforcement entourage watches from afar, some smiling, others annoyed.

you’re lifted clean off the ground as strong, tattooed arms slip over your head and around your body. thick fingers work their way into your hair, cradling your head to his shoulder.

actions speak louder than words, you know that much from how quickly he buckles, dropping to his knees with your body still wrapped around his.

toji smells different every time you come to visit. there were days when the tang of blood stuck to his skin no matter how hard he scrubbed, a telling sign of his short temper.

other days he’d smell like the earth, soil from the rec field permeating his already brown garments after his morning run.

once in a while, you’d catch hints of industrial paint and car exhaust, a smell built up from hours of making license plates for pocket change from the state. “pennies,” he’d tell you, “that’s all we fucking get in here.”

today, toji smells like himself. like the man you fell in love with 7 years ago in the passenger seat of a BMW, gazing into green eyes while gentle hands brushed the hair from your face.

you almost think he’s laughing until warm tears trickle through the porous fabric of your shirt.

strong shoulders quiver as quiet sobs rack his body, you rub his back in small circles, unable to pull away with how tight he’s holding you against his chest.

“i love you,” the inmate whimpers, wiping hot tears with his sleeve. he pulls back to press your lips together, mumbling nonsense in between kisses.

“pretty girl—m’ sorry— missed you,” his hands shake as they curl into the fabric at your waist.

you’d seen him cry exactly twice in his life. the first being the night he’d opened up to you in full for the first time, quietly relaying stories of neglect and abuse from his childhood while you kissed tears from his cheeks.

the second was well, the day he went away.

to see him break down like this so openly was devastating. he hated being emotional, told you it was humiliating. you’re sure he felt more than vulnerable, the leader of the city’s biggest drug ring, crumpled on the floor of a prison hallway

“it’s okay baby,” you tell him, still rubbing circles into his skin.

to touch him like this, at last, was unlike anything the two of you had been allowed to experience for the past 7 years. this wasn’t your two legally allowed hugs at the beginning and end of your visits, or a quick fuck in a storage closet.

this was love. to hold and be held in front of law enforcement personnel without threat of being reprimanded. this was the first time you had been allowed to feel him under the tips of your fingers with an audience, publicly declaring your claim on each other without fear.

you never blamed toji for what had happened, as angry as you were that first year. he blamed himself enough for the both of you really.

you’d come to learn over the years that it had already been too late for him to get out of his line of work way before you’d found each other, a cycle he couldn’t break.

prison was always a possibility, inevitable even. that’s just how it was.

you slowly gather your purse off the ground, cellophane-wrapped flowers coming into view.

“for me?” he laughs, slightly embarrassed. dark green carnations, just like his eyes.

“who else?” you tease, watching the distress melt from his face.

you share a look briefly, yours saying you’re safe with me. his saying i know.

the soft clicks of black work boots pull you from your thoughts, a female officer in tow.

“you guys ready to get started?” she asks softly, shooting you a sympathetic look.

toji stands with a chuckle, not letting you respond. silver cuffs dig into the meat of your thighs as you’re carried back to the group.

˚ ✧ ───────────

half an hour of paperwork for his freedom. that’s what you give the prison in exchange for his belongings and dignity.

the waiting room is quiet, sterile air filtering through dated vents. calloused fingers rub over your ankle, legs propped up in his lap.

“feels like a hospital in here,” he mumbles, trying to cut through the silence.

the cuffs are gone, thank god. though you’re more than unhappy with the marks they left on his wrists. toji doesn’t seem to mind, used to almost a decade of this treatment.

the release desk worker slides you two a yellow bag under the glass divider once you finish your task, pointing you in the direction of the bathrooms in case toji wanted to change.

the inmate—no, ex-inmate you remind yourself— hands you the bag with a disinterested look.

he doesn’t want to remember, you realize. too scared to wear the suit he had on the day the world took you from him. you quickly trash the old clothes and hold out your shoulder bag to him, fresh clothes neatly folded inside.

“always prepared huh?” toji smiles, grateful at the gesture. “haven’t changed a bit.”

you wait a couple of minutes outside the single-stall bathroom, physically picking your jaw up off the floor when he emerges.

to say that his old shirt fit would be... egregiously wrong. blasphemous even.

toji’s shirt doesn’t just “not fit”, it’s bursting at the seams as it struggles to accommodate his hulking form, stretching over plains of corded muscle like a rubber band pulled too tight.

seeing him so often had likely gotten your brain used to the change, preventing you from realizing how fucking big your fiancé had gotten. truly.

the black garment is so tight against his body that it’s practically a second skin. you make note of the way it molds into the dips and curves of his abs, mentally reminding yourself to get him to wear it for you later.

you suppose the change makes sense. if toji wasn’t with you on a day visit he was always in his cell, sticking to a strict workout regimen to take his mind off things. still, you rack your brain trying to pinpoint how and when such a massive transformation slipped your mind.

a tattooed hand snaps you out of your trance, cradling your cheek.

“you focused?” your fiancé teases, rubbing circles into your jaw with his thumb.

“i think that thing’s gonna explode if you move,” you swat his hand away.

“would you rather i take it off to be safe?” he asks, jutting a thumb behind him at the waiting room desk.

the workers make no attempt to hide their oggling, faces pressed against the glass barrier separating your party from theirs.

“no— god keep it on,” you mutter, shooting them a nasty look.

“you and your girlfriend ready to go fushiguro?” an officer says, holding the door open for the both of you. toji squats down momentarily to get a grip on your thighs, folding you over his shoulder to carry you fireman style.

“wife,” he corrects, shouldering past the guard and trudging down the corridor with calculated steps.

the coos that ring out from the help desk are humiliating.

waxed tile fades into worn concrete as the two of you pass the threshold into the prison parking lot, your soon-to-be-husband muttering a curt “go fuck yourselves” to the officers who’d wished him good luck on his way out the door.

you’re proud of him for holding his tongue, in a way. knowing toji and his temper there were a hundred more creative and undoubtedly gruesome things he could have said to the personnel who’d kept him locked up for the better half of a decade.

the world flips right side up again as you’re gently placed on your feet in front of the car.

toji raises his head to the sky, basking in the warmth of the afternoon sun.

“s’ nice,” he mumbles, reaching to intertwine your hands. “felt the sun during rev time but.. not like this.”

you hum, rubbing your thumb over tattooed knuckles.

“get ready to experience a lot more sun then,” you giggle. “wanna have a look at the car?” the question is more of a rhetorical one at this point considering he’s already running his hand over the hood with a whistle.

“haven’t seen this baby in a while,” he smiles, internally gushing at your choice to welcome him to the world in the car he used to drive you home the night you met. your fiancé doesn’t have to say thank you, you know how grateful he is from his smile alone.

he falters for a bit, looking like a newborn fawn with how careful his steps are as he circles the vehicle. you figure wearing proper shoes instead of rubber slides must feel at least a little abnormal after 7 long years.

“alright,” toji states, rolling his shoulders in his too-tight top. “fuck are we waiting for, i wanna go home.”

˚ ✧ ───────────

you pay no mind to toji the first time he turns to look at you, opening his mouth to say something before slumping back into his seat with a frustrated sigh.

the fourth time it happens, you speak up.

“what are you doing?” you laugh, eyeing him from the driver's seat

“getting rubbed to death by my fucking zipper,” he mutters, repositioning his lower half to take the pressure off his cock. his frustration isn’t aimed at you in the slightest, all blame placed on his bottoms.

oh.. oh.

the whirlwind of emotions toji had gone through in the past 3 hours alone had taken a toll on his mind and body. but tasting the first morsels of freedom with you, alone in a car that smelled like you? you’d be worried if he wasn’t hard.

you had no problem helping his little problem go away, the question was how soon.

the idea that piques on you is absolutely shameful, you’re not even sure where it came from but you don’t have it in you to care.

you know this road, you’ve used it a thousand times to make the trip up to the penitentiary. judging by how long you’d been driving you’d say there was about 10 minutes left before ruler-straight tar merged into the twists and turns of the suburbs.

“when did your license expire?” you ask, cautiously peering in the rearview mirror. good, no cars.

“3 years ago,” he laughs, “why?”

fuck it, you think.

“you still remember how to steer?”

“course i d— oh.”

it finally dawns on him. you smile, shooting him a look that says “want to?”

you’re sure you have your answer judging by how quick he shucks his jeans and boxers down, freeing his cock from its confines.

“oh fuck,” he groans, struggling to keep his eyes open as your mouth presses against his base.

your fiancé steers while your head bobs just beneath the dash, one hand on the wheel and the other placed firmly at the crown of your head, guiding you up and down the shaft.

your throat flexes around the intrusion, fighting the hulking feeling of his length mercilessly fucking into your mouth.

“fuck, perfect girl— my girl,” he shudders, hips moving to buck into your slick throat.

“gonna cum, gonna— shit,”

fingers kissed in dark ink massage your throat softly, urging you to swallow the hot load coating every inch of your mouth. you flutter around his length, pulling back to clean him off with your tongue.

“fucks gotten into you, pretty girl?” he whispers, so out of breath you barely hear him.

˚ ✧ ───────────

you barely make it up the steps of the house before you’re shoved against the door, tattooed hands groping up and down your body with fervor.

“keys,” he says against your lips, “keys—fuck, now,” his voice is hoarser this time, desperation clear.

you whip around to jam the item into the lock, not unaware of the rock-hard dick grinding into your jean-clad ass from behind.

you’re being carried to the couch before you even step off the doormat, a stray throw blanket cushioning your fall as you’re pressed into squeaky leather.

“won’t be gentle,” toji groans, ripping your jeans and panties down in one fluid motion.” can’t right now.”

“don’t be.” you say, rucking his shirt off his body surprisingly quick. “wouldn’t want you to.”

you needed him, needed toji to have his way with you. to christen your home round after round until you couldn’t feel where his body and yours ended.

when it came down to it, you suppose

he smiles at the crude admission, rubbing the head of his cock up and down your drenched folds.

“filthy,” he mutters, said almost lovingly. toji grips his base and sinks to the hilt with a sharp groan, shuddering at the heat of your walls.

the stretch is delicious, filling you from every angle and pressing right against that special spot. you’re surprised at how easily he slams in, though you’re embarrassed to admit it was entirely because of how soaked you were.

toji immediately pulls back with a flick of his hips, pistoning into you like his life depends on it.

he hasn’t changed, you think. still so incredibly in tune with your body, skills that would put a pornstar to shame.

this was better than some quick closeted fuck under the cover of night after slipping a guard a rubber band of cash. this was primal, filthy. two bodies writhing against each other, the only goal being complete and utter pleasure.

toji makes no effort to shush you like he would if you were sneaking around, basking in your sighs and whines like water from a stream.

“missed this,” he says, licking a long, wet stripe from your sternum to your pulse. “missed you, missed having you every day.”

“you’ll have me forever,” you moan, sucking a purple bruise into the tattooed skin of his throat.

thick fingers thread into your hair to hold you to his neck, silently commanding you to bite down.

and so you do. you bite down hard on the junction of his neck and shoulder, licking over pink teeth marks as his thrusts reach their maximum speed.

the pleasure you feel is blinding. stars explode behind your vision while the curve of his cock hits that heavenly spot in you just right. over, and over, and over.

your climax sneaks up on you before you can think, ripping a wail from the depths of your chest. toji’s thrusts falter to a halt as you lock down on him, pleasantly caught off guard by the vice grip you have around him.

“oh my g— holy shit,” he groans, mouth hanging open. dark brows furrow it to a look of pure pleasure, emerald eyes squeezing tight.

“keep going,” you mumble, scratching rivets down the skin of his back. “just keep fucking me please don’t stop please pl—”

“yeah? keep going?” he teases, groping at the swell of your breast. “greedy huh?”

you did want more, that was the thing. you just came the hardest you ever had in years but you’d be damned if he didn’t keep giving it to you.

brutal thrusts shake the frame of the couch. your bodies meld like they were made for each other, sharing pleasure in the comfort that came with the knowledge that the both of you intended to fuck until you physically couldn’t anymore.

“gonna come,” your fiancé pants, mouthing at the curve of one of your breasts. blunt teeth brush over the bud of your nipple, sending shockwaves down your spine

“inside, fuck—please,” you’re practically shaking.

“inside?” he repeats, the word rolling off his tongue like gold. “you want my seed? huh?”

you nod, clutching to his naked back as he ruts into you, deeper than ever. strong hands grip the back of your thighs practically folding you in half, opening you up in ways you thought to be impossible.

hot release fills you up for the second time that day, shrouding your lower half in a blanket of warmth.

you sigh, low and satiated at the feeling inside of you, pulling toji to your chest when he collapses on top of you.

“we should probably..” toji trails off, completely out of breath. “should probably head upstairs.” he heaves, chest swelling with deep gulps of air.

“or we could go another round?” you mumble, throwing the question out there.

“shit, yeah.. probably should right?” he chuckles

taglist ! 🏷️

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awearywritersworld · 9 months

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fushiguro toji x reader summary: toji takes his pretty wife to the art museum w/c: .5k tags/warnings: smut. unprotected sex. sex in a public bathroom. "daddy". fem!reader. 18+ a/n: bro why is he so large??? like let me breathe?? anywho, this is the product of a little too much wine. sort of a continuation to this fic masterlist

*nsfw below the cut*

he can't take it anymore.

you begged toji to take you out to the art museum, and of course he acquiesced, but the cute little dress you're wearing is absolutely killing him.

your fingers are laced through his, dragging him along as you excitedly point out different pieces you like. he's surrounded by some of the most impressive, priceless art in the world, yet his eyes don't leave you. not even for a second.

he finally breaks when you bend over to inspect the details of a painting, revealing your tiny cotton panties to his hungry eyes.

"fuck," he growls, grabbing you by the arm and pulling you toward the bathroom. "need you, baby. now."

"t-toji, slow down." you're tripping over yourself trying to keep up with his long strides, but heat pools between your legs with each step.

he rips the bathroom door open, not even bothering to lock it behind him before he's got you pinned against the tile wall, his lips on your neck.

"what if someone hears? we could get kicked out or-"

"sweetheart, you're the most beautiful thing in this whole place," he mumbles against your skin. "we wouldn't be missing anything."

that's enough to leave you hazy eyed with desire, any worry about consequences thrown out the window.

he grabs you by the waist roughly, growing more impatient with each passing second, and lifts you up onto the counter. as he pulls your legs apart, your dress rides up, and he knows there isn't a view in the world more perfect.

he pulls your panties to the side before running a calloused finger up your folds, groaning loudly when you push yourself against his hand. "you're such a needy little thing."

you just nod up at him, your chest heaving with anticipation as he fumbles with his belt and pushes his pants down just enough to free his cock. the sight of it makes your mouth water.

you whimper when he presses the tip to your entrance, your legs wrapping around his waist eagerly. he easily slides inside, his pace already unforgiving. "shit, you take me so well, baby."

his movements are rushed— desperate, even— but you don't even think about commenting on it. you know he'd have you bent over his knee the very next second.

"you're my good girl, you know that? letting me use this pretty pussy whenever i want," he grunts, his strong hands squeezing at the flesh of your hips greedily.

you bite down on his shoulder, trying to stifle your moans, but you feel so full and he grazes your cervix with every thrust and the string of filthy words in your ear is just too much-

you nearly cry out in frustration when his movement stills, not yet realizing someone had walked in on the both of you. the stranger chokes out something of an apology before pulling the door closed and toji just looks at you with a smirk.

"please daddy, don't stop," you plead with teary eyes, one hand grabbing at his bicep weakly.

he considers your words for a moment and he really does hate denying his sweet little wife, but toji is nothing if not a cruel man. "beg for it."

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ttsukiimi · 13 days

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❛34 + 35! ❜

୨୧⋆ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 ⎯ 69 position w ur fav! ^.^

୨୧⋆ 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 ⎯ toji x fem!reader, smut (mdni), 69 position, cunnilingus, oral sx (male receiving), tongue fcking, toji’s a munch, lil bit of throat fcking, fingering, tongue fcking, reader referred to as ( princess, good girl )

"Keep still or I'll fuckin' stop, " Toji rasped against your cunt, the deep tremor of his voice vibrating through your body. You felt his rough palms glide against your skin before they harshly gripped at the fat of your ass, the vice grip effectively keeping you in place.

The bulge poking through his sweats was practically speaking to you, grey material swelling to accommodate the sheer girth and size of his hardening cock. Your mouth watered.

"What's takin' you so long, princess?" Toji mumbled, licking a teasing stripe up your folds, laughing as your body jerked in momentary pleasure. "Start suckin'."

As if on the impulse of his words, your hands flung to the hem of his sweatpants and practically shoved it down, along with his boxers. And, to say you were mesmerized was an understatement.

No matter the number of times you saw him, his size had always amazed you—nevertheless the fact that he was fully fucking hard at the moment.

You leaned in, placing sweet kitten licks on the leaking tip, and that's when Toji's tongue began to move, in tandem with yours. Your back arched deliciously from the stimulation, a sugary cry leaving your lips.

"Toji—Fuck," you hissed, absentmindedly grinding your hips back onto his face, smothering his nose and lips in your slick. Toji groaned under you, happily accepting the essence dribbling from your core, curling his tongue upwards as he slid it inside you.

Your moans were muffled as you took him in, your lips descending until your throat was at its limit, your small, delicate hands twisting around what you couldn't fit in your mouth.

"Shit, that's it, good girl." he sighed, resuming the motions of his wet muscle, fucking it in and out of you, euphoria shooting through your body and causing you to lose your focus.

Noticing your loss of clear mind, Toji donned a smug grin as he began not only thrusting his tongue into you, but also rutting his hips up into your mouth every time you stopped.

"Mmf—baby, no, can't take anymore!' you mewled, body shaking as you felt him insert a finger.

"Not stopping 'till you cum. Keep suckin' and I might think about it."

Another thick finger pushed into your hole, prompting that tell-tale feeling of heat blooming in your lower stomach. Toji could tell you were close by the way you clenched around his digits and tongue.

You tried your best to resume sucking him off, slowly bobbing your head up and down the length of his cock. But your tear-filled eyes overcrowded with stars, blinding your vision and soon enough, your orgasm washed over you like a wave.

"Ah, 'm cumming..." you sobbed, thighs quivering only to be held down by Toji as he lapped up every last bit of your climax.

You weren't expecting the huge load of seed that later filled your mouth, looking back at Toji with doe eyes and cheeks overflowing with sticky white, wondering what you should do.

His lidded eyes met yours and he gulped down your juices, only murmuring one word. "Swallow."

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teddybeartoji · 23 days

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THE LITTLE LAMB AND THE BIG BAD WOLF

on a hunt for supplies, you stumble across someone's belongings. a little bit of theft is fine, right? the cold barrel of a gun at your temple says otherwise.

☆. contains: toji fushiguro x gn!reader; apocalypse au; horror, detailed descriptions of blood and death, slow burn, crack, reader is simultaneously a scaredy-cat and a baddie, toji looks scary oh nooo

☆. word count: 6k

☆. note: the world is based on tlou!!! i am soooo into this fucking concept like i'm officially sucking my own dick here. tagging my beloveds @staryukis & @awearywritersworld bc omfg apocalypse ideas!!!!!! and also @dollsuguru @venusiansilk @twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat @mossmurdock i love you guys so so much thank you for all your support<3333333

+ here's the masterlist

in a world so fucked up – it's easy to get lost in the darkness.

when the infection took over, everything changed. everything. people aren't people anymore – they've become hosts for a type of fungus known as the cordyceps. it grows all over the brain and takes control of the body, turning the person into something they're not.

if anyone were to ask you how many have you killed, infected or not, you'd be devoid of an answer.

it's hard to find your way when just about everything is out to get you. infected or not – there's always something ready to tear you into pieces, to sink their teeth into your soft flesh – that's just the way things are now.

but you're used to it. used to the feeling of adrenaline pumping in your veins as you run from a horde, used to the feeling of a blade at your throat, used to the feeling of a punch, of a slap. used to the constant grumble in your stomach, used to the sore legs and shoulders, used to cleaning off blood from yourself and your clothes, from your weapons. you're used to the gurgling and clicking, the crying and sobbing, the begging and pleading.

but no matter how much you tell yourself that you've grown used to the horrors of the new world, you cannot escape the anxiety that hides under every inch of your skin. it's always with you – holding your clammy hand as it drags you into the depths, into the shadows. you try to fight it but it's hard.

it's hard forcing away the only thing that holds you so tight, the only thing that truly cares for you. it's is a suffocating blanket that hides you from the cruelty of the world, trying its best to shelter you from it all. it's better to stay inside. it's better to stay away. they're going to hurt you. something is here. just stay here with me, under the warm blanket. they're coming. it's going to hurt. let's stay here forever.

don't you want it to stop?

being torn apart by the cold crippling fear and the warm rotting hands – it's getting harder and harder to breathe. but you've learned how to keep them at bay over the years; always in the line of sight, always on your mind. there's no rest for the wicked.

moonlight leads the way as you make your way to a shopping mall. the wind howls in your ears and sends a shiver down your spine. moss and ivy cover the walls of the massive building, swallowing it bit by bit, making it a part of the nature as the time passes.

the axe in your hand feels heavy, but right nonetheless. the handle is stained with blood; it has seeped deep into the wood and now acts as an extra weight to the blade. a small 9mm handgun sits pretty in the holster around your thigh, a knife hides in its leather sheath on your belt, a bow rests on your shoulder and a few arrows peek from your bag.

despite the armory, your bag hasn't been this empty in a while. the blame falls on a group of men you ran into a week or so back. precious ammo and resources were spent on the bastards, and while the blood reward was good - the lack of food and meds is now becoming concerning. your shoulder still hurts from the fall, a big dark bruise transforming your skin into a painting of the midnight sky.

you shake the flashlight on the strap of your backpack and listen to the batteries bounce around inside it. you give it a stronger shake and it turns on. the broken glass shines as you carefully step inside the big atrium and take a look around. your little light forces back the creeping shadows, now showcasing you the infected bodies that lay dead on the ground before you.

pools of blood conflux together and paint the tiles a dark shade of maroon; the ichor flows in between the cracks and disappears under the soles of your boots when you step further inside. they're fresh. light reflects off the liquid as you squat down to take a closer look. none of the three bodies seem to have bullet wounds – one of the runner has a slit throat while the other leaks from a hole in the side of the head and the clicker... it's head has been completely bashed in, making it hard to even recognize it as one.

beating up a clicker is not easy by any means; though the fungus growing on their face and head blinds them, it also acts almost like armor. they can take a bullet to the head and still keep coming – the call of death rippling through their body as they run at you, hands reaching out to grab, to pull, to hold.

the fact that they did this, either with their bare hands or some other blunt object, just means that they're good. it also begs the question whether they didn't have the bullets to spare or they simply decided not to use them. you just hope you won't bump into them.

standing up, you take another look around. a trail of bloody footsteps leads right up the escalators and you decide that you won't be going there yet. there are a few more bodies, two runners, sitting limp against the crumbling walls as you step down one of the hallways. the broken tiles and the glass cracks below your feet and you cringe at the noise.

never letting go of the axe in your hand, you stroll past the first stores seeing as they're completely ran through. with a sigh, you make your way over to one of the clothing stores. it's almost pitch black in there and you almost jump out of your skin when a mannequin suddenly falls at your feet. muttering out a row of whispered curses, you lower your axe with a shaky breath and adjust your flashlight. the shelves are pretty empty but that was expected; still, when you open up a cupboard door under one of the mannequin stands, you find a stack of perfectly fine sweatshirts. you check the other side of the piece of furniture and find... nothing. scoffing to yourself, you just bag the a sweatshirt and a pair of pants from another shelf before moving to the next store.

glass breaks and you hear shuffling – head whipping towards the sounds, fingers tightly gripping the axe, you take a step back and bump right into the shelf behind you. pieces of clothing fall onto the floor and a cloud of dust rises from the impact; you pay it no mind as your eyes are still glued to the counter, to where the noise came from, but when after a few second absolutely nothing jumps at you, you let your shoulders relax a little.

a stalker, maybe? but they don't tend to live in open spaces like malls, or so you think at least. the majority of them you've ran into in places like office floors and a fucked up basements – meaning they like to lurk everywhere where it's extra dark and where there are places to hide behind. yeah, they do that. little shits, taking cover behind desks and walls, playing a game of hide and seek that you never agreed to. you're never forgiving yourself for taking that wretched route.

you peek over the counter and look all around it but find jack shit. it's the darkness – it's what it does to you, to everybody. the shadows start to speak and move, the floors creak and crumble, and the growths on the wall whisper your name, no matter, how much you tell yourself that they aren't actually doing any of that that.

it's just the old building crying out from loneliness, the haunted ghosts simply looking for company as people pass by, as the infected pass by. you have to keep your head straight. faint blood marks stain the floor but it's too hard to tell whether those've been there for years or less.

you hastily knock on your flashlight when it begins to flicker, leaving you in the dark for just a blink but it's enough to have your heart thumping loudly in your ribcage.

making your way out of the store, you scour for your next location and ah-ha!

a pharmacy.

two bottles of antibiotics rattle in your bag but those aren't enough. you'll always need more of those, you'll always need more of gauze, painkillers, of everything – going in there is a must.

a metal roll-up door closed mid way is going to make this harder, but as if that isn't ominous enough – the quiet cries coming from behind it only makes the situation worse. a runner. but luckily, it isn't making too much noise and you make an educated guess of it not moving around. they do that when there's nothing to catch and tear apart, when nothing has caught their attention. they stay in random spots and whimper and cry to themselves. it makes them an easy prey.

the thought of the metal door sliding shut just as you're trying to pass under it, is making your stomach churn. and so is the thought of you making too much noise by accident and attracting the runner when you're still down on the ground. stop being a pussy. there could be emergency kits in there, pills, there could be a feast of medications in there and you're holding back. it's unacceptable.

you slowly kneel down to the cold floor and inhale sharply before lowering yourself further down. the only light in the room is yours and it immediately finds the twitching runner.

it is cowering in the corner.

you're just fucking glad they don't react to light as much as they do to noise, otherwise you'd be fucked already.

you crawl in the dust as quietly as you can, careful to not touch any of the furniture beside you that seems to be holding up the door. the last thing you'd want is to get locked in here. or get cut in half. you clench your teeth and push yourself up and to your knees the second you can do so and take a second, as you wait for him to turn around and lunge at you. but he doesn't. his back is still turned to you as he waits for you, sobs for you; his body trembling, hands folded in front of his chest – almost like he's hugging himself.

quietly holstering the axe, you pull out your knife instead. it's quieter. you grip the handle, fingers molding into the dents that have formed over time. another step and the light goes out. it's complete darkness. you hear your own heartbeat in your ears and the miserable cries of the infected just a few feet away. your eyes widen as you try to focus on your surroundings. your hands grow clammy in a matter of a few seconds and panic seeps into your body.

you shake the flashlight a few times and it turns back on. your breath is still stuck in your throat as you try to compose yourself. stupid old thing. the light paints the runner's shadow onto the wall in front of him, making it look like he's a part of some shadow play.

one more step and you're with him, a breath away. your hand goes around his chest, holding his hands and body in place as you sink your blade into his neck. it sinks into skin and flesh like butter, soaking you in the dark red ichor that hides underneath as he gurgles something at you (a thank you perhaps).

yanking the knife back out, the splattering ichor coats your skin and you immediately wipe it off against your shirt. his body falls with a thud! and another big dust cloud rises from the contact and your nose itches— it's— it itches— achoo!

your eyes are an inch away from escaping your head as you spin around, making sure that nothing is jumping at you for making a noise that loud. but surely enough, nothing seems to be interested. exhaling deeply, you rub your nose and force down the embarrassment that's crawling on your skin before starting your hunt for supplies.

it doesn't go as well as you'd hoped – only bagging a few stitching kits and a bottle of painkillers. better than nothing.

ecstatic to get the fuck out of a closed, pitch black room, you crawl back out from under the metal door and dust off your clothes.

strolling through some more stores, you're met with more dead infected. two clickers and two runners, no bullet holes. ignoring the corpses, you manage to find yourself a few nice t-shirts, a pack of boxers and a box of 9mm handgun ammo from under the cash register.

when you've gone through most of the wrecked stores on the first floor, you finally decide to take a look upstairs. the bloody footprints haven't left your mind but the fact that it's been so quiet, makes you think that maybe they did really just pass through here.

the moon light your way as you drag yourself up the escalator. the stars in the sky are barely visible because of the dirt on the ceiling window and you frown.

in front of you there are two hallways with stores on the sides and in the middle. the prints lead to the left side and towards the a lonely door at the end of the coridor; the signs on the walls don't indicate what room it might be – a security one, maybe? shaking your head, you focus on the stores ahead of you. the shop in the center is a big sports one; most of the mannequins have fallen over and their limbs are scattered all over the floor, pairless sneakers rest on top of each other and the shelves are a push away from collapsing into tiny little pieces.

stepping over the bloody clothes, you view the baseball caps on the rack when your light goes out again. you feed on the faint moonlight that's coming from the hallways as you scramble to shake the thing again. steps, you swear you heard steps. the last standing mannequins stare at you from the shadows, laughing at your misfortune. a hand touches your hip and you can't hold back the yelp that slips from your lips. you turn and bump into another statue. the light flickers three times before it actually turns on and you find yourself inches from an eerie smile. intinctively, you give it a firm push as you take a step back, hands shaking as the panic settles down once more.

no one else is here. you can't see whoever could've made the noise and by now you're sure that if something or someone is really hiding in the dark – it would've already made a move if it wanted to. stalkers don't play for that long and neither do humans.

a row of protein bars hide in a drawer in the staff room of the store and you happily throw them in your bag, along with some weird looking granola bars.

the right side of the second floor only offers you a new lighter, three pairs of socks, a can of soda, a simple necklace and a broken watch. what's the point of it if you can't tell time? it looks cool. no other reason.

heading over to the left side of the building, you keep a keen eye on the door. the remaining shops are forgotten the closer you get to where the prints lead and you officially commit to checking out the place.

the blade of your axe shines in the moonlight, your steps extra light as you creep up on the door. readying your weapon, you press down on the handle and quietly push it open. it swings all the way and thumps against the wall. the room is lit up, the windows letting in the natural light. you're greeted with rows of computer and tv screens on the tables, three black duffel bags and some lockers and cabinets next to the walls.

you check the corners of the room and let out a relieved sigh when you don't find anything hiding. closing the door, you carefully step around the broken glass on the floor. it seems to be originating from what used to be a glass case showcasing various medals. awards for the best security guards. how silly that sounds now.

the lockers have been cleared out, the only things left behind being two lovely couple's phots with hand-drawn hearts above their heads. you leave them there. the cabinets don't have anything good either. you glance back at the door for good measure before kneeling down in front of one of the bags on the ground. you pull the zipper and are met with treasure – multiple bars of chocolate, the same sweatshirt you found from the floor below, various cans of canned food, two water bottles and a small knife.

your eyes glint and the corners of your lips twitch upward, your body has a mind of its own as it immediately reaches for the chocolate. glass breaks and your eyes flick to the now ajar door as you reach for the gun on your thigh but when you feel the cold metal of a gun barrel resting against your temple... you freeze.

"don't."

...

your stomach drops, eyes glued to the bag in front of you. the voice is deep and it's rasp, confident and sure of himself; the metal against you doesn't move, it doesn't shake.

you hold your trembling hands out, fingers spread to show that you don't have any intention of grabbing your weapons. a deep breath in and a deep one out. you try to turn your head towards him but he just presses the gun deeper into your skin, forcing your gaze right back down.

his big stature looms over your smaller one and you feel like an ant that's about to be stepped on. he lets you soak in the threatening silence, the only sound being your own racing heartbeat.

"s'rude to steal, y'know."

the man doesn't sound angry, he doesn't sound mad or upset. he sounds... annoyed, if anything.

"i asked you a question."

shit.

"i– i wasn't stealing." you stammer out.

he scoffs. "wasn't stealing? just fondling my shit for fun then?"

the teasing tone makes your eyebrows furrow and you try to turn to look at him again, your body slightly raising from your knees but the gun on your head keeps you down. funny, how heavy a piece of metal can suddenly feel.

"it was empty in here! i didn't know these belonged to anyone! i–i'm sorry! i'll leave, i'll leave!" it's a pathetic slur of words accompanied by a pleading tone and you hope that it'll do the trick.

there are strategies for dealing with people and this is simply one of them.

and it does work because the next thing you know, he's lowering the weapon. you let out a shaky breath before turning to him and fuck.

he's... terrifying.

towering over your kneeling body, he's massive. big chest and broad shoulders, he looks like he could snap your neck with his bare hands. the moonlight is only making him more menacing – his dark hair falls in front of his eyes as he stares down at you; there's a scar on his lips and streaks of blood cover his skin, from his cheek to his jaw and down his neck.

dark clothes and a dark jacket – he looks like he belongs in the shadows. the fact that you didn't hear him until it was already too late is making your skin crawl. he probably only let you hear him. for the fun of it.

the terrified look on other's faces can be addicting. the big eyes and the wobbling lips; how they shake and beg – you're no stranger to it, you've had your moments, too.

other than the gun in his hand, there's a second one holstered around his big thigh just like you do. a serrated knife sits his belt and it keeps winking at you, the flashlight reflecting from it as you pull in big breaths of air.

"you're saying i oughta just let you go?" he scoffs, yanking you from your thoughts.

"please..." your stomach grumbles on cue, helping you look meeker than you really are.

you're sure you just saw him wince as he squats down beside you but the thought is brushed away immediately when the man cocks his head to the side and scratches his temple with the barrel of the gun. his scarred lips stretch into a big wolfish grin, showing off his sharp canines and his eyes glint from behind the black strands of hair, making him even scarier now. the big bad wolf.

he's taking you apart with his eyes, dissecting you and your thoughts with a smug expression while you're fending off the waves of fear and try to look as composed as you can. though you feel like it isn't working at all.

"d'ya find anything good from the pharmacy?"

"why were you stalking me?" your bark comes out sharper than you intended and his eyebrows raise an inch, eyes shining with something teasing.

"kind of hard to miss ya when you're making so much noise, sweetheart. and yer in my spot, anyway." he sigh with an eye-roll.

your lips part in a small gasp. "i was not making that much noise! and– and what do you mean 'your spot'? it's a fucking mall, i need things, too!"

"clearly." he motions to the duffel bag resting at your feet and you swallow your next snarky comment.

"sorry."

"what was that?"

just glaring at him, you hate how amused he seems. the fear in you dissipating fast and something akin to annoyance is starting to grow in it's stead.

"i didn't even fucking take anything!"

body leaning forward, fists balled up and eyes on fire – he's thoroughly entertained by your barking and you immediately purse your lips.

"relax, little lamb, will ya? tell me... what'd you find in there?"

you scrunch your nose at the stupid nickname. despite how non-threatening he's being right now - you're still planning on running. you'll give him whatever he wants and you're getting the fuck out of here.

"nothing much. stitching kits and painkillers."

he's hums disappointedly and you can't help but wonder why. is he looking for something in particular? is he hurt? "what do you need?"

"forget it."

"i have antibiotics, if that's what you need."

at that, his ears perk up. "is that so?"

you nod at him.

"well, c'mon then, show me what ya got."

you stare at him for a moment before peeling off one backpack strap. you pull the bag onto your lap and feel his heavy gaze on you as you dig around the thing. it doesn't take you long to find the right bottle, pulling it out and handing it to him.

the floor creaks and it has you both turning towards the sound in an instant. he has the door in his sights but nothing is there. your heart is hammering in your chest again and you can taste the bitter anxiety in the back of your throat again.

you've never seen anyone hold their gun so steady as he does. no shake, no tremble; he's not even really squeezing the thing, he's just holding it. there's no pressure, no anxiety – it's simply an extension to his body. he's comfortable with it, and he looks good with it. a bead of sweat rolls from his temple and mixes with the drying blood on his skin before disappearing under his clothes.

his breathing is normal, he's calm as he lowers the gun back down and starts observing the bottle in his other hand. your eyes are still on the door, still wary of the ghosts that lurk around.

the man squints his eyes at the miniature text on the bottle in the dark and you hold back a laugh.

"need me to read it for you, old man?"

"watch your mouth." it's playful at best, no real sternness behind it whatsoever and it makes you roll your eyes. you're about to ask what he actually needs the pills for but something in the corner of your eye draws your attention.

a pair of dull, grey eyes. staring right back at you. dark veins run all over her face and neck, her shoulders and her hands and she peeks from behind the doorframe.

one second. no more, no less. your sharp intake of air gets his attention just as the stalker lunges from the dark hallway, but she is met with a hole in her forehead before she can even take a proper step inside.

small pieces of brain splatter onto the wall behind her and she falls limp to the ground just a few feet from you. he's waiting for another one to pop up, his eyes still glued to the door and you know that this is your moment. he has the meds, so he shouldn't chase you down anyway. you have to go now.

scrambling up from your knees, you try to speed past him but immediately choke when the collar of your own sweatshirt sharply cuts into your airways. his grip on the material is strong and he pulls you right back into him, back into his arms. he's mere inches from your face but before he can do anything else – he feels a blade against his throat.

you really aren't the little lamb he thought you were.

he's comparing you to a feral cub in his head – big wild eyes, snarling and showing your teeth, trying to act tougher than you are, but when the sharp edge of your blade sinks deeper into his skin, he realizes that maybe you're not actually in over your head.

he already expected you to run, he was waiting for that but he thought it'd end up with you you crying and begging or something. he didn't see this coming – you're definitely craftier than he thought, faster too.

"now... why would you do that-"

you don't let him finish. "are you gonna hurt me?"

"you're the one with the knife at my throat. i should be asking you that." he rolls his eyes as your knife grazes the soft skin below his adam's apple and you're thinking about actually cutting him just out of annoyance.

"you have the pills, why not let me go?" you bark back.

"you're hungry, aren't ya?" he questions calmly. his gun hand is lowered, he's not pointing it at you but his other hand stays on your back, fingers still digging into your sweatshirt. it's warm, his body is warm.

"so what? you gonna feed me like some stray cat?"

"y'don't want to eat?" he deadpans.

...

you bite into the soft flesh of your inner cheek. of fucking course, you want to eat.

"y'can take two cans from the bag. i mean, y'were eyeing them anyway."

"why?"

"for being my entertainment tonight."

the blade on his throat finally draws blood and a drop of it runs down his skin, disappearing under his shirt.

"i oughta kill you for putting a gun at my head."

"yeah?" he cocks his head closer to you, the blade moving with him, making a few more droplets dribble from the tiny wound. "go for it, sweetheart."

his eyes are green. they're green like the leaves that sprout from between the cracks in the asphalt on a sunny day, green like the moss that flourishes on the trees in the forest, green like the ivy that is trying to swallow the world. you feel his heart beat a; calm and steady while yours is amped from the sudden proximity. he sounds so arrogant, like he knows you're not going to hurt him.

(you aren't.)

when you lower the knife to push at his broad chest with a scoff instead, he lets you. his hand falls from you as you take a step back, your face now illuminated by the moonlight. scars litter your skin, bumps and cuts – just like him.

"are you done?"

you hum with a pouty lip and put away your knife, eyes following his figure as he holsters his gun before picking up the fallen pill bottle. when he steps by you, he plucks your flashlight from its place on the backpack strap with way too much ease and proceeds to head over to one of the duffel bags that sits on the table behind you, carefully stepping over the broken glass on the floor.

"hey!"

he shushes you and your fists tighten beside your body. you look at the dead body that lays next to the door with a perfectly centered hole in her forehead. the blood pools around it, soaking her clothes and the ground below her.

you used to think about the infected more, used to ponder about how long they've been like that and whether the person they used to be is still... in there.

it doesn't matter.

you've come across people, who talk about not wanting to kill them – what if they really are still in there? but isn't that exactly why one should kill them? you can't even begin to think about how it'd feel to be stuck inside your own body as the infection takes over, making you into something you're not. how it'd force you to tear your loved ones apart just for the sake of it, how you'd turn into a bigger monster with every passing day, every passing second. you just hope that if you were to get infected, you'd still have the mind to end it. or have somebody do it for you.

you don't want to end up like her.

"i didn't realize there were stalkers here." you mumble to yourself as you tear your eyes from her. "other than you, of course. fucking creep."

he starts digging around in one of the bags and you take the moment to really observe him. his back is almost twice your size and you're sure his one bicep is bigger than your whole head.

the man scoffs. "thought i got them all but... oh, well. should've let ya handle it – was your fault anyway."

"how the fuck was that my fault?" your voice raises at his claim and you regret it, knowing exactly what his response will be.

"you are fucking loud, sweetheart."

"fuck you."

he just hums out a mhmmm. he pulls a piece of paper out of his bag and uses your flashlight to examine the text on it. his eyes. he waves at you over his shoulder. "you know where the cans are."

simply scoffing as a reply, you kneel back down to the bag but his voice cuts in again.

"and don't you dare take that chocolate." he doesn't even turn around, completely focused on comparing the information on the paper to the info on the bottle of pills. you roll your eyes again and curse him under your breath. "i wasn't gonna take your stupid fucking chocolate..."

when you've bagged your goodies, you push yourself up again. the trees dancing in the wind outside catch your eye, they look so carefree. just living from the sun and the moon and the rain, they have nothing to fear. nobody will harm them, no infected, no people. you can't wait for nature to take back everything it deserves. the cities and the buildings; it'll swallow the corpses and the living alike and you're happy for her.

he rustles with the paper, twisting it around a few times and you're about to ask what he's looking for but he cuts you off.

"why not make a run for it earlier?"

you stare at his back with a confused look. "what do you mean?"

"you gave me the pills and then tried to run. antibiotics are hard to find, y'know." he sounds curious. or patronizing.

"i know that... i had to wait for the right moment." you admit, fiddling with your fingers. "i was going to give them to you anyway, old man."

"not a lot going on in that little head of yours, huh?"

...

you let his audacity waft over you before biting back. "oh, i'm sorry... for... being a... good person?"

he turns around and leans his ass against the table, folding his arms over his big chest as he mocks you with his annoying smug grin. "i pointed a gun at you and you still wanna share your little precious belongs with me? that's cute, i guess."

"yeah. you just look like you fucking need them, alright...."

"so, you agree that you're a fucking idiot?"

your lips part in shock. "hey! look– do you want anything else or can i go now?"

"can i have my flashlight back?"

"no."

"wha— " you take a step toward the man and he raises his brows. "but it's mine! how do you expect me to go outside without it?"

"no manners whatsoever."

huh?

your jaw drops again. "excuse me? wha– what's that supposed to mean?"

"first, i catch you stealing— "

"i already apologized for that— "

"—then you try to kill poor old little me, and now you're asking for things without the magic word... tsk-tsk-tsk." he closes his eyes and shakes his head in disappointment.

"i'm not gonna fucking beg for my own flashlight back, bitch."

...

he barks out a laugh.

a loud one, from deep within his stomach. his head falls back and a pout forms on your lips, heat crawls up your neck involuntarily and you avert your gaze. "you're terrible, just terrible, sweetheart."

he takes your prized light and tosses it to you before pulling out his own from behind his back. you flip him off. "funny though, i'll give ya that..."

you grumble a yeah, thanks under your breath as he blinks the light at you twice. "may i go now?"

he stares at you before answering. "yes, you're dismissed."

at that, you knock your heels together and sharply bring your right hand to your temple – imitating a military salutation. "yes, sir!"

something sweet.

he tastes something sweet on his tongue. he wipes the drying blood from his neck and his cheeks hurt.

you're some random feral cub and yet, you've peaked his interest like nothing else. no cries and no wails, no begging and no tears – scared but alive. ready to part with valuable meds just because he apparently looks like he needs them. tch! growling at him even though he's caught you red handed, cutting him even though you weren't in danger anymore.

he hasn't felt this alive in a long time, either.

"don't let me see you again, old man."

playful, at best. you're matching his tone and the corners of his lips are reaching back behind his ears. you bite your inner cheek; despite everything – he's the most normal person you've met since the end of the world. he's not mean nor is he aggressive; everybody points a gun at a stranger these days. he made jokes and he gave you supplies – it's more than anyone has done for you in a while.

you look at the wolf in the shadow and he looks at the lamb in the moonlight. the wolf that offers food and protection and the lamb that cuts and steals.

the wolf that bleeds and the lamb that holds the blade.

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noosayog · 4 months

Text

THE NATURE OF LONGING

... is that the heart only wants for what it can't have.

fushiguro toji x fem!reader

contents: nsfw, non-curse au, arranged marriage, enemies to lovers, mutual pining, slow burn, lots of angst, fluff, eventual smut, each part will have its own cw/tw

wc: 4.3k as of part 1, no release schedule

Taglist: OPEN, send an ask!

MDNI

part 1

part 2

part 3

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javarium · 4 months

Text

4 am | f. toji

w — non-curses! au, periods, mentions of blood and severe cramps and everything that goes with having a period haha. this is short sorry; this is total flop material but I need it outta my drafts 🤣

a/n: it’s that time of the month again lmaoo. I’ve had this in my drafts for two months. i need to make a masterlist for all my period-comfort fics now 😂

[ divider credit to @/firefly-graphics ]

You’re already out of the bedroom and probably downstairs by the time Toji’s able to blink the blurriness from his vision. You turn from one side to the other, then just shoot up out of bed — that’s what initially wakes the man — before disappearing.

Toji’s eyes turn to the door, then to the clock, 4 in the damn morning. He then looks to the ceiling as he groans and lifts himself up. Holy fuck I don’t want to be awake, he thinks. But you’re awake, and he doesn’t like the way you left the room because he knows something isn’t right with you.

Toji blinks a few times and shakes his head free of sleep (as much as he can anyway). It’s a slow trek to the living room, but once he gets there, he sighs. You’re sitting on the floor, legs curled up to you as your upper half rests against the couch. You don’t raise your head from your arms on the cushion as he sighs.

“I’d ask if you were okay,” he says, “but you clearly don’t look it.”

“Mmmnnnn, nope,” you mumble. He’s just barely able to hear it. “Feel like a tired, smoldering pile of shit.”

Toji almost laughs. He coughs behind his hand, enough to tell you he was holding back laughter.

“Come on,” he then sighs. “At least lay on the couch. You’re not helping your back.”

“I’d rather have a stiff back than these cramps. Fuck off.”

He snorts. He leaves you be, only to return a few moments later with a heating pad, some crackers, and a bottle of water. You almost say ‘thank you’… until he turns around and walks back into the kitchen.

“Ass…” you mumble.

You close your eyes and climb up onto the couch and curl up against the armrest. You hear Toji in the kitchen, glass, metal, plastic, and pans clinking all together as he worked on whatever he was working on. As curious as you were, you didn’t want to bother him. You weren’t even sure you had the energy to hold conversation.

You assume twenty minutes pass. You almost begin to doze off when Toji’s deep voice speaks to you and wakes you up. You blink in surprise, then are surprised even more when you see what is on the coffee table: pancakes and sausages, lemonade in a tall glass.

“It’s what I know will help,” he says. The man sits on the ground and pats his leg. “Come here.”

You gaze down at him tiredly, a small fatigued but happy smile on your lips. You settle into his lap, and as his warmth hits your back and hot hands over the front of your tummy where your uterus would be, you moan loudly as relief settles over your body.

Toji, however, let’s a frown cover his face at the feeling of all of your tension leaving your body, finally relaxing against his own. He almost cusses in shock, but bites his tongue as you begin to slowly eat the pancakes and sausage he’s made for you.

You won’t eat it all, he knows this. You lose your appetite whenever your personal monthly hell rolls around. But—

“Thank you, Toji.”

—whatever he can do to make you feel better, especially with the newfound realization of how much tension your period can cause, he’ll do it without hesitation.

(Just don’t confront him directly or try to tease him about it, unless you want him to ban you from his kisses and/or cuddles.)

#fushiguro toji x reader #toji x reader #zenin toji x reader #zenin toji x you #toji x you #toji x y/n #toji fluff #toji fic #jjk toji #jjk fluff

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tojikai · 2 years

Text

Open Arms

PART I: Fix You | PART II: The Sun Will Rise | PART III: Closest to Heaven | PART IV: Open Arms

Pairing: Toji x Reader

Genre: Angst

"Lightning never strikes the same place twice."

"I have a little sister," Megumi muttered in the passenger seat. Amazement and joy were evident in his voice. Toji put on his seatbelt and hummed in response, slightly amused by his son's reaction. It's like he still can't believe it.

It was sunny when they entered the cafe earlier. Now, it started to rain. The weather seemed to be mimicking the turn of events; finding out about his daughter with you and finding out that you have someone else now.

"Aimi's very pretty; she looks like her." A sincere smile made its way to Toji's lips as he tapped on the steering wheel's shiny yet rough surface. "Y/N's got a boyfriend," He added, laughing bitterly, nodding his head as if the information was just starting to settle in. Toji sniffed as he looked ahead, trying to think of something other than the image of you, your boyfriend, and his daughter walking away.

It hurts too much. And Toji doesn't think he can move on from you.

The windshield caught the fine droplets of rain, only for them to roll down. The crystal clear waters of the rain made all the roads look darker. It reminded him of how beautiful you looked today, as you painted his heart gray.

"She didn't tell me about it when we first met again." Megumi looked down, feeling sorry for his dad. He saw the look in his eyes as he watched the other man wrap his arms around you. He felt terrible that he didn't ask you about it. He felt bad that he didn't consider the possibility that you might've moved on with someone new during the years that you were gone.

"I'm sorry, I didn't ask. I could've told you beforehand." Megumi knows that having known about it before the meeting wouldn't really lessen his father's heartache, but he thought that he would at least be prepared for it. And even if Toji knew that you already have someone else before the meeting today, he'd still come to see you.

Oh, what he wouldn't do just to see your face again.

"It's alright, don't worry." He swallowed the rising pain in his chest. Megumi was silent after his short response. Toji could tell that his excitement to bring the two of you together again was what distracted him from asking about your new life.

"At least, we'd still see her when she brings Aimi." Despite the soundof her baby daughter's beautiful name, the context of the statement left a bitter taste in Toji's mouth. It's a hard thing to say for someone who's hoping to get back together with their ex.

You must be really happy with him. His thoughts sent him back to the time that you two were together as he parked his car in the garage. He heard Megumi say that he'd be going ahead inside, but he couldn't bring himself to answer as countless ideas ran through his mind.

It could've been him. It could've been him who you are so happy with. He could've made you feel loved. He could've made you feel beautiful as much as your boyfriend does today. You could've been with him right now, resting at home as you enjoy the rain with Megumi and Aimi.

It all suddenly feels too painful again that Toji had to lean on the car to prevent himself from breaking down on his knees. He thought that seeing you and his daughter was enough for him, but when it dawned on him that he was once in that guy's place, all the heartbreak that he'd been suppressing in that cafe came rushing into his veins, spreading like wildfire.

Toji is strong. But not strong enough to stand through the pain of entirely letting you go.

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BEFORE THE MEETING

"It's best if this one's just between the three of us." You sighed, fixing your lipstick in front of the circular mirror attached to the cabinet. The day has come, and the anxiety inside you has made your heart feel thick and exposed. You could see the annoyed look in your boyfriend's eyes as you watched his reflection.

"You're wearing that?" He asked, ignoring your explanation, and the hint of a scoff didn't go unnoticed by you, but you chose not to pick a fight with him. After all, he agreed with this, even if it's not okay with him. The least you could do is comply and accept his conditions. You decided to look at it as him being protective of you.

"Do you think it's a bit...revealing?" It felt like it's been the fifth time that you asked him that today. He kept asking you to change and wear something appropriate. But what is appropriate when meeting your ex-husband for him? Is it not a three-fourth sleeved dress that goes past your thigh?

'Maybe the neckline's too low.' You thought as your boyfriend stared at you with a distressed look on his face.You felt bad that you're leaving him out for this, but you didn't want to make both parties uncomfortable.

Aside from that, what you're going to talk about is no small matter. Your daughter is concerned, and you could only expect so much reaction from Toji and Megumi. It just doesn't feel right if you bring someone unfamiliar to witness that. It's an intimate moment between a parent, a brother, and a child who's about to meet for the very first time. You feel like the presence of your boyfriend could cause them to hold back on some things.

You don't really get why you're explaining these things inside your head when you know that it is your right to decide about this. You just thought that your boyfriend might need a thorough clarification. After all, he's a part of your life now, too.

"Get changed. Wear something conservative. I don't want anything to happen to you." He said sternly as you just finished fixing your earrings. It kind of offended you; for him to think like that.

He's worried. He can't help it. You mentally remind yourself before you start saying something that could end up in an argument. Instead, you let your own note ease the creases on your forehead.

"Would you mind picking one for me?" You rushed to the dresser on the other side of the room, giving him a small smile in an attempt to light up the mood. You get that he's upset about the situation, but you didn't think that he'd be this sulky.

"I'd call when I'm coming to pick you up." He stood beside you, scanning through your neatly hung clothes inside the dresser. You stayed silent as you thought of a way to address his question.

"Uhm… maybe I could just call you when we're done. You know like, just to let them spend as much time as they can with each other." You took the dress that he handed to you, seeing his eyebrows bump closer together. "Aimi, Toji, and Megumi, I mean." You quickly added. Your lips felt so dry despite the newly applied gloss on top of it.

"No, I'll pick you up. I don't think it'd be right to leave you with him for long." He insisted, fixing the straps of his watch. He sighed loudly as you turned around to face him, looking at him with a slightly open mouth.

"You think I'd do something?" You chuckled in disbelief before proceeding to take off your dress to change it with the one he picked. You stripped off your dress, looking up at him as you waited for his answer. It was slightly humid that morning, but this discourse is making your toes feel cold.

"Not you. But what if he does something? How sure are you that he wouldn't harm you?" He bit back, watching you turn around. His hand automatically reached for the zipper of the dress to pull it up. Tiny goosebumps formed on your skin as you felt his finger graze the skin on your back.

"He's not like that." You clicked your tongue, getting tired of the discourse.

"You get so defensive when it comes to him, you know. Did you forget how shitty he made you feel?" That hurt. Every time you remember the love that you had for Toji and what you got in return, it takes you back to that situation. You never fought with your boyfriend about this, and he hit you just right where it hurts the most.

"You don't even have to remind me that." You whispered as your eyes locked on the floor. You were almost taken back to the time when you had to endure all those nights feeling like you were the most complex person to love.

"Look, at this point, we won't get anywhere with this." He exhaled, stepping away to walk past you towards the door. "I won't come with you this time, but you have to understand that it's not good for you to stay around him for long. It's not good for us." He added as he slammed the door on his way out. He might seem a bit controlling, but you know that he's only worried for you.

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You stood in front of their house as the person's footsteps from the other side got closer. Aimi was babbling in your arms as she pointed at the different plants and flowers she had spotted around the neighborhood.

You heard the door's lock click before it opened, revealing Toji in a beige sweater. His hair was still wet, and his eyes held a tender gaze in them as they looked into yours. Seeing his face against the sunlight made you realize that the cold depths of despair were now gone in his eyes.

Megumi wasn't lying when he said that his father had finally moved on from his mom.

"Hey," He spoke softly at you, making Aimi turn her head to look at him. Her little squeals of joy almost surprised you because she's only met him once and for a short amount of time, but she's already so excited to go into his arms. The little kid wiggled as she reached out to Toji, who gladly picked her up.

"How's my Aimi?" He cooed at her, and you could swear that it stirred a feeling in your chest, something that made you nod your head without a second thought when Toji asked you to go inside and stay for a little bit.

“You don't have to stay if someone's waiting for you. I mean, I'm not asking you to leave, but I didn't see your car, and your boyfriend might be outside.” He asked, trying as hard as he could to start a normal conversation with you as he put Aimi's bag down on the couch before gesturing for you to take a sit.

Toji secretly hoped that your boyfriend was not outside. Because he doesn't really want him inside the house. As much as he wants to act civil around him for you and your daughter's sake, Toji doesn't think he can sit and laugh with him inside the home he once shared with you, the home you once covered in your light.

"No, my mom dropped us off. He usually just comes over on Sundays or whenever he is free. He's got work, and we don't really live together." You looked around the room and were surprised to see that everything you had arranged was still in place. The colors of the curtain were the same color as you liked them. The vase you bought from that mountain town you toured with Megumi was still there. The custom-made bookshelf you ordered at the shop downtown. All of them.

"Sorry, I…I didn't really change anything here. They're still your stuff. Does it…Does it bother you?" You flinched when Toji spoke beside you, sitting Aimi on his lap. A glass of juice was now placed on the small table in front of you. How long have you been looking around?

"N-no. Not at all. It's just… it reminded me of when I lived here." You stammered, and you knew it wasn't the best answer when Toji sighed and looked down. Guilt was apparent in his eyes, and he probably thought that you were talking about the heartbreak you had to endure within these four walls.

"I like it," You tried to console him without being obvious. "I… I kind of missed it, actually." You added, seeing a sad smile crawl up to his lips.

"It's alright. I understand." The door opened just as he answered, and Megumi came into view. His eyes lit up when he saw you and Aimi. The little girl broke free from Toji when Megumi opened her arms to her, picking her up before walking towards you to give you a kiss on the cheek.

"I bought something from a nearby convenience store." He explained, dropping the small paper bag on the table before plopping down on the loveseat with a squealing Aimi pulling on her brother's spiky locks.

Once again, you found yourself admiring the sight in front of you. You were wonderstruck by how happy your little girl is and how smiley Megumi is even as Aimi pulls on his hair too hard.

You never thought that having a feeling of longing inside your chest could make you feel this guilty as you thought of your boyfriend. You cannot get used to this. You cannot get too fond of this because someone's waiting for you.

"I, uh, I have to go now. I'll just pick Aimi up later and—" You began to gather your things as you sat up straight, preparing to leave when Megumi cut you off.

"It's Saturday. You teach at a high school around here, right? Do you work on Saturdays?" His eyes held hope as they looked into yours. You know that he'd want you to stay for a bit longer. Not just for the sake of his little sister, but also for catching up.

"She might have some other things to do, Megumi. Teachers are busy people." Toji stood up to fetch his keys. He knows that you can't say 'No' to Megumi, so he took the stage for you and indirectly rejected his son's unsaid request.

"Oh yeah, sorry. You can just…visit anytime you want." He forced a small smile as Aimi waved her little hands at you, seeing you pick up your bag. She must be really comfortable here, that she's not even trying to run after you.

"Be a good girl. Mama will be back later." You kissed her forehead as she slightly nodded at your words. You gave Megumi an apologetic look for not staying. "We'll hang out next time," You patted his head to reassure him. You could tell that he also wants to spend time with you.

When you looked back, Toji was already staring at you with the same look he had when he saw you entering the cafe.

You could only imagine what would happen if his boyfriend saw him looking at you like this. He's been a bit more possessive ever since you decided to meet with Toji again, but you understand that he's only afraid to lose you.

"Uhm, I'll get going now." Toji blinked as if he was snapped out of a trance. He looked at you for a couple of seconds before humming and heading towards the door with his car keys dangling in his fingers.

"You didn't bring your car, right? I'll drive you to your house." He spoke as you looked back one more time to his living room and the two kids who are now playing on the carpeted floors. You didn't know how a simple sight could make you feel so warm.

"Yeah, it's on the repair shop, but it's okay. I can take the cab, don't worry." You replied as you awkwardly avoided his eyes. To be honest, you didn't want to take the cab. Ever since you got your own car, you could only count on your fingers the total number of times that you took it.

You pulled out your phone to contact a driver when his hand gently grabbed your wrist. You almost pulled back as you looked beside you, only to remember that your boyfriend wasn't with you. And that's another reason why you don't want him to take you home. What if your boyfriend's home? It's Saturday. It's not impossible for him to get off work early or even have a day off.

"Sorry," He drew his hand back before pointing to his car, opening his mouth as he thought of what he was trying to say. You didn't know that it could get this awkward when it's just the two of you alone.

"You know… just let me drive you home. I can explain to your, erm, your boyfriend if you're worried about that." He can still read you like an open book. The words 'your boyfriend' slipped out of his mouth so fast, like he didn't even want to use it in the first place.

"It's not like that." You didn't mean to sound so defensive about that topic, but you know that it really is like that. You don't know what your boyfriend would say if he saw Toji taking you home. You remember how he reacted when you told him about your co-parenting plan for the first time.

"I can't believe you really want to co-parent with someone who treated you like that, Y/N." Your boyfriend laughed and scoffed at the same time as if it was the most ridiculous and unbelievable thing in the universe. You have been arguing about this matter for a couple of minutes now, and he's still trying to convince you not to do it.

To be honest, his reaction exceeded your expectations. Your initial thought was that even if he didn't like the idea of it, he'd still support you. It's definitely not these words of mockery.

"It's not about me. It's about his daughter. I don't want her to grow up not knowing his father." You answered him with a frown, showing him that you didn't appreciate the way he responded to your life plan. You thought he'd always support you. But on the other hand, you thought of how hard it must be for him to share you with someone, even if it's just for your daughter's sake.

"And I don't want to take away his rights from him. He deserves to know of her. You're a man, too. I'm sure you wouldn't want your daughter or son taken away from you." He stood up, shaking his head as he looked at you with both disbelief and irritation in his eyes. You looked down, not wanting to see the disappointment anymore.

You know that your boyfriend is not the best person when angry, but aren't we all?

"You don't even know if he'd want her. Hell, he didn't even want you back then, Y/N!" He harshly spoke to your face, and you couldn't help the tears that formed in your eyes. He doesn't mean them. He's angry. You thought as you wiped away your tears. You don't know what to say back to him because you know that it's possible and true.

The small lampshade at your bedside table casts your figure's shadow on the wall. You were sobbing in your hands, and the shallow sniffs that escaped you were soon cut off by your boyfriend's apologies.

"Y/N, baby, I'm just looking out for you. What if he hurts you again?" He kneeled in front of you by the edge of the bed. His hands caressed circles on your knuckles before kissing them and reaching out to wipe your tears.

"I know what I'm doing. I just want you to support and understand me." You continuously sob, feeling him move to sit beside you before enveloping you in his arms.

"Fine, then. Alright." He sighed, rubbing your back and kissing the side of your head. "Just don't let him take you away from me, Y/N. You're doing this for Aimi, remember." Your boyfriend might seem possessive, but you know that he's only looking out for you.

"Then it shouldn't be a problem. I'm just trying to make things easier and more comfortable for you here. Don't worry, I know where I stand." The words made your eyes wide, and you didn't know if it was just a coincidence or if he intentionally used the words you had told him before.

Looking up at him, you have proven it to be the latter. You wondered if he also felt this guilt bubbling up in his throat when you turned away from him with those words that night. You don't know which is more painful: distance yourself from the person you love because they're holding on to their past, or distance yourself from someone you love because they 've already got someone else standing beside them?

You don't know how your eyes looked back then, but the sorrow in Toji's eyes right now is far too prominent to not notice. You nodded as you hummed to him, bringing his eyes back to you.

"That's fine by me. Thank you." His shoulders relaxed as he gave you a small smile, beckoning you to follow him. You stared at his back as you walked towards his car, and even if his build is still standing as tall and fit as he did back then, you couldn't help but notice how he had lost some weight.

You murmured a small 'thank you' as he opened the passenger side for you. You watched him walk across to get in his seat and also just now noticed the dark circles under his eyes. Were you so tense at the cafe that you're only seeing these things now?

"I never really got the chance to ask how life is going for you right now, you know? It's all 'how are you's, and then we jumped to business." You started, trying to clear the awkwardness in the air as you sat in the car, looking at him through the small, rectangular-shaped mirror.

"Yeah, I guess. We were too busy with Aimi at that time." He chuckled, scratching his head as he stared back at you, smiling genuinely. Being inside the car muted every single noise outside, and even the softest hitch of a breath could be heard. You don't know if he just caught yours now.

It's not like you're falling for him again. You have someone now, and you wouldn't do anything that could make them lose their trust in you. It's just that… that smile was a rare one. Even when you two were still dating, you rarely saw him smile that truthfully. It made your heart soft to know that his daughter's name could easily bring that out of him.

"But I'm doing okay. Work's not that heavy, and I mostly stay at home with 'Gumi during free days. And sometimes, very seldomly, drink out." He answered, inserting the key into the ignition and starting the car.

You're more than happy to know that he didn't spend three years moping around. You doubted that he would, anyway. You know that he's better than that. He cares for Megumi, and he wouldn't let him experience something as hard as taking care of a drunk father.

"I cleaned the whole house, kept away a couple of things. Just stuff I should've done many years ago." He looked down before looking at you, and you thought the three years that he was summarizing in a few words were playing inside the irises of his eyes. You couldn't look away.

"What about you? What did you do these past three years?" If the car hadn't started moving, you wouldn't have been able to tear your eyes away from his face. It shouldn't be like this when you're already in love with someone else. You swallowed as you looked down at your fingers.

"I worked for a few months. Then I had Aimi. My family helped with our needs at that time. Then I got back to work after a year, and Mom took care of Aimi sometimes." You trailed. Your brain suddenly ran out of words to describe how the years went by for you.

Toji thought about how hard it must've been for you. Alone, in an unfamiliar place with an infant and a broken heart. He still doesn't know how it's going to be like for the two of you every day, but if he can, if you will let him, he'd like to make it all up to you. Maybe not in the way that he wants, but in a way that you and your daughter need.

"I'll take her to work with me. I mean, you're a teacher, and you got way more things to pay attention to when working while I'm just sitting in an office." He proposed, and to be honest, it doesn't sound bad at all.

You've been feeling bad for having to call your mom every now and then to look after Aimi and even thought of hiring a nanny because of it. You don't feel at ease with the idea of leaving your daughter to a hired person, but if she's with Toji, you know that she's safe.

"Are you sure? Your boss might not like having a kid in the building." Your eyes switch between him and the road as you completely relax in your seat. The uneasy feeling of being in a confined space with your ex is now gone, and only the comfort brought about by the conversation between two parents discussing what's best for their daughter can be sensed.

"No, she won't mind. I told her about it already, actually. She was happy about it and even asked to meet Aimi. She's in the age when she's starting to miss the childhood of her own kids, you know." He laughed lightly, and you internally sighed, seeing how smoothly everything might just go for your co-parenting plan.

"That's great, then. You can tell me when you can bring her. I can drop her off at your office." You smiled at him, quickly looking down when his eyes flicked to your lips. You wanted to help Toji move on even though you knew how hard it might be for him, mainly because he'd have to see you a couple of times every week.

"It's still open." You pointed to an ice cream shop that you used to take Megumi to back then. It was a lone store by the curve, and the three of you liked that place because there were not many people. It was quiet and cozy. The colors are very pleasing to the eyes because of their cool yet bright tones.

"You wanna take Aimi there tomorrow? I'm sure Megumi would be excited to show her around." You remember the colorful containers of jimmies and the toppings that one could freely choose from. Aimi would surely love to go there. But you're not so sure if your boyfriend would appreciate you not spending time with him on his only free day. The smile on your face quickly vanished, and you looked away from the reflection of the ice cream shop, getting smaller and smaller in the mirror as the car moved farther away from it.

"Nevermind, it's Sunday tomorrow. Your boyfriend would be home." Toji cleared his throat, and you're sure that he noticed how your mood about going to the shop changed. You feel bad that you won't be able to join them, but you also don't want to leave your boyfriend alone. You're not planning on taking him with you because that would be really disrespectful to Toji.

"Sorry, I'll just…Next week. We can all go together next week." You answered briefly, looking out the window to avoid looking at his face in the rearview mirror. The leaves are blurred, yet you can tell that they're dewy from how hard you are looking at them to distract yourself.

You might just say fuck it and agree to go with them even if your boyfriend is coming to your house.

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Everything might be going smoothly between you and your ex, but not between you and your boyfriend, who clenches his jaw as he drives you to Toji's to pick Aimi up. He came home today just shortly after Toji dropped you off.

"I don't know why you're still so angry about this. We already talked it through." You sighed exasperatedly as he clenched his hands around the steering wheel tightly. The skies are orange in color as the sun begins to set. This scenery could've made this ride a little more soft and memorable if your boyfriend wasn't being moody beside you.

You argue a lot. But as your mother said, "It's normal, especially when the relationship is young." and you've held on to that ever since. You thought that maybe you just don't know how people act when they genuinely care for you.

"Is it wrong for me to worry about you going in and out of his house?" He bit back at you. His voice was a little louder and rougher than how he usually talks. His fist collided with the lines of the steering wheel as the light turned red.

"Nothing's going to happen. What kind of a woman do you think I am? And I already told you he's not like that." You turned to face him, eyebrows knitted together in frustration as you ran your hands through your hair.

"That's not what I'm angry about. Why does it have to be that often? Every week? Really?" He scoffed at you, and you felt like pulling every strand of your hair from your head because you were tired of arguing about these things. Ever since the co-parenting thing was brought up, he's always been starting fights about it. You were sure that you explained everything to him, though.

"That's why it's co-parenting. It's a plan. I can't just bring Aimi whenever I want. It's our child, half of him and a half of me. Of course, we'd need to have as equal as possible time with Aimi." You're trying to stay calm because you don't want to arrive there in the state you both are in right now. It's definitely going to be more awkward than when they met in the cafe.

"It might just be you. Are you sure you're not just dragging him onto this?" His words are starting to hurt, and you can tell that he's going down that path again, the path to your past, and what your relationship with Toji was like.

"How can you say that? You're being insensitive right now." You were in disbelief. It's only been the first day, and it's already like this. You wondered how things would go like in the following days, and you could only pray that they would get better because you were trying your best to put yourself in his shoes.

"I'm being insensitive? Or are you just being too sensitive? I'm simply telling the truth, Y/N. Didn't you hide your kid from him because you thought that he wouldn't want her? What if he just agrees with this out of obligation?" He screamed at you making you flinch. You didn't flinch because of the volume of his voice. You flinched because what he said hit you right where it hurts.

"He's not! He loves Aimi. He's even taking her to work. How could you even talk about Aimi like that?" You held back a sob as you said the last sentence. He said 'your kid' like he doesn't see Aimi as his daughter. If you're going to be together, he's going to have to look at her as his own, too. That's what you told yourself when you started seeing each other.

"I don't know." He sighed, shaking his head, as if every argument you just laid out to him were jokes. "I don't know why you keep pushing it with him. If you struggle there, don't ask me for anything." He stopped the car in front of Toji's house, and you sat there, controlling your tears.

You never really asked him for anything. You got together with him when you already had Aimi and lived an established life alone with her. You didn't ask him for support because you didn't want anyone to think that you're using him to substitute for your missing baby daddy. You simply liked the way he comforted you, made your feelings valid, and made you feel like you were really there. He gave you what Toji didn't give you when you were together.

But these are definitely not what he's doing right now. You wonder if you made the wrong choice to move back here. You thought that maybe this was a bad thing for your new relationship. But you reminded yourself that it's all for Aimi, and that you'd already planned to do this even before she was born. You don't want your daughter to feel incomplete. There's nothing you wouldn't give up for her.

"If you want someone to provide for the two of you, I can do it. You don't even need him." You know that the statement was meant to make you feel assured that you had someone to lean on, but for some reason, it made you feel angry. He was saying that you only brought Aimi to Toji because you wanted child support.

"But Aimi does! Aimi needs him because he's her father. Stop making this about me." You snapped, unbuckling your seatbelt as you saw him shake his head at the side of your eyes. A derisive chuckle escaped his lips as you got out of the car.

He can get angry as much as he wants, but he's not stopping you from doing what you think is best for your daughter. Even if you argue every day.

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Toji was sitting on the bed with a giggling Aimi lying on his chest as he scrolled through the online store. He was looking for more stuff that his daughter might need when she's in here. He and Megumi already went shopping the next day after you introduced Aimi to him, but he feels like he still needs more.

Megumi was lying on his stomach beside them when the doorbell rang. Toji, knowing that it was you, stood up immediately. Aimi looked up at him as if she knew that her Mama was finally there to pick her up.

"It's probably, Mama. We're going to open the door for her and fetch your things, alright?" He bounced her up and down as they made their way to the front door.

"Mama, door." The toddler mimicked, pointing towards the door, and Toji could only hum as he kissed her chubby cheeks, making her laugh. It was the most beautiful sound to him. He was reminded of how awestruck he was when Megumi first started talking and realized how long ago that was already.

"Mama!" Aimi squealed and eagerly reached out to you when Toji opened the door. Toji was about to ask you to come in while he gets Aimi's things and some toys they bought when he saw your boyfriend striding towards you with a small smile on his face. He greeted Toji with a nod as he put an arm around your shoulder. He wanted to roll his eyes. But he held back and nodded back in return.

"Let me get Aimi's things first. You can, uh, you can come in if you want." Toji scratched his head as he opened the door wider for the two of you. You smiled at him and he was sure that you were about to let yourselves in when your boyfriend answered for you.

"It's okay, we're kind of in a rush. I'm taking Y/N out for a date tonight." He pulled you closer to him. This isn't the first time he saw you two like this, but the throbbing in his chest didn't lessen one bit. Your smile faded for a second as you looked up at your boyfriend before smiling and muttering a quiet "Yeah." to Toji.

"Oh, alright then." He hurried, biting his lips as he tried to stop his hand from squeezing everything that he held in his hand.

He doesn't know how long the stinging pain in his chest would last. He can only hope to be numbed by it as time goes by.

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A month went by fast and the co-parenting is going better than you thought. Today, you're picking up Aimi from Toji's office. You parked your car outside the building and recited the floor number and the direction to his room in your head. Whenever you drop off and pick up Aimi in his company building, Toji always just meets you outside, so this is the first time you're ever going up there. 'To save you the hassle.' as he worded it, which you really appreciate a lot.

As for your boyfriend, you're grateful that the fights had died down, but the problem now is his distant behavior towards you. You thought that maybe it's still because of this co-parenting that he's acting up. You plan on talking it out with him when he visits you during the weekends. You don't really want to just stay like this with him. You value him in your life and even if your relationship isn't even a year old yet, you still don't want it to go to waste.

On the way to Toji's office, you were glad that you didn't run into anyone who knew you. As much as you'd like to meet your mutual friends again, you're also not in the mood to talk about whatever has happened in your life.

You knocked on Toji's door and heard a 'come in' and some of Aimi's adorable giggles from the inside. You smiled at the thought of your little girl and his dad bonding together even when he's at work.

You thought that he'd be the one playing with Aimi when you entered the room, but to your surprise, it was an unknown woman who was holding the toddler as Toji sat beside her on the office couch. You remember Toji telling you that there's someone at his work that could look after Aimi if he has meetings and she must be that person. He was facing them and the woman was playing with your daughter. They looked like a family.

A happy family.

You didn't understand the pang in your chest as you stared at them. They're both looking at you as if you're an intruder in their own little world. To see your daughter in another woman's arms as the man you used to love gazed at them with soft eyes is something you didn't expect to bring back the pain you felt before.

Was this how he felt all those times that he watched you and your boyfriend pick up Aimi from his house?

You blinked when you remembered your boyfriend. You shouldn't be feeling like this when you already have a boyfriend. You shouldn't be longing like this when there's already someone by your side. You know that you shouldn't feel like this, but this is the first time you saw him with another woman and it fucking hurts.

"Hey. This is Yuka, she helps here with Aimi." He stood up, taking Aimi from her as she smiled at you. You wondered if she was his secretary. If she's here during this hour, she must be working for him or something.

"She's a close friend of mine." Oh. A close friend. "Yuka, this is Y/N. She's Aimi's mother. The ex-girlfriend I told you about." You wanted to sneer but stopped yourself. After all, you already have a loving boyfriend. There's no reason for you to feel bitter about being called the ex-girlfriend. It's the truth. He's simply introducing you.

"Hello, Ms. Y/N. Toji told me a lot about you." Well, he never told me about you. The irritation was rising within you in a way that you couldn't quite fathom. She took care of your daughter. The least you could do is be nice to her.

"Oh well…they better be good things." You joked, making the woman laugh as she looked at Toji, who was also staring at Yuka with a small smile on his face. So, he smiles for other people, too? It's nice to see that he's finally moving forward.

You already did, it's only right that he does too. You only wish him the best.

"Mama, mama! Toy!" Aimi waved in front of your face as you walked to her bag, which was placed on a single chair near his table. You just wanted to get out of here. You suddenly felt suffocated. Maybe you could call your boyfriend over and spend some time together. You're probably just tired.

Before you could put the bag on your shoulder, Toji already took it from your hand. Smiling down at Aimi as the toddler reached out to his face. He kissed her forehead before locking eyes with you.

"I'll drive you home, let's go." He muttered as he stepped away from you. That was the closest his face had been to you ever since your first meeting. You quickly looked away and hummed at him, before looking over to Yuka, who's now sitting back down on the couch.

"Yuka, I'll be back in a few," Toji called out to her as she gave him a sweet smile. She waved to you and Aimi and you couldn't help but wonder what she really is to Toji. If she'll be waiting here 'til he comes back, then they must have plans.

You swallowed as you silently followed Toji outside his office. It's none of your business anymore. Whoever he's seeing is none of your business. The only thing you're concerned about is how they'll treat your daughter. And Yuka seems to be taking good care of Aimi, so you shouldn't be worrying too much. There's nothing more to think about.

But if they're more than close friends, Yuka would be a lucky girl, for she wouldn't have to feel like a filler for someone who isn't there anymore. Unlike how you felt back then.

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"Hey babe, It's Saturday, you coming over tonight?" You spoke on the phone as you locked the door. You're about to pick Aimi up at Toji's when you decide that you'd give him a quick call.

“Uhm, no baby, not really. Sorry, we're just really busy here. Maybe on Tuesday, I can take a day off." You frowned at his answer. If he won't be coming tomorrow, that'd be the third Sunday you won't be spending time together. You wonder how busy it is at his work that even he can't even visit you on Sundays.

"Oh, is that so? It's fine, then let's just go out on Tuesday after my class. Please, don't skip your meals. I love you." You sighed internally, not wanting to add to his worries, stress, and work. You won't lie and say that it's perfectly fine with you. You felt a bit neglected, but you have to understand that he also has things to do. Just like how he tries to understand your situation with Toji.

"Yeah, babe. You too. Bye." Just like that, he ended the call. Maybe there's really a lot going on in there. He probably just took a short break. He's not always like this, anyway. Just these past few weeks. Walking to your car, you remember how the past Sunday went.

You spent time with Toji, Megumi, and Aimi at the ice cream shop. You had to endure the ride to the shop listening to Toji talk to Yuka on the phone. At first, they were discussing work matters; then the next they're talking about this new restaurant around the block and how they should visit it after work.

"They're going with colleagues," Megumi spoke, as you both sat waiting for the Toji who ordered your ice creams with Aimi in his arms. The little kid was so happy when she saw all the colors inside the shop that you momentarily forgot how Toji was so busy talking with someone else on your supposedly 'bonding day.' even if you're not a whole family anymore.

But that's just it. You just wished that he'd pay more attention to Aimi and Megumi rather than his 'close friend' who he probably sees every day in the office. It's not about you. You also have a boyfriend to text. It just takes him a couple of minutes to reply because he's busy, but he still does.

“It's probably a company dinner. They always have that." Megumi gave you a comforting smile and you don't know if it's because the annoyance was obvious on your face or if he's mistaking it for jealousy. You won't be jealous of that. There's no reason to. You broke up already and the only thing keeping you close to each other is the kids. There's nothing to feel jealous about,

"Oh, must be nice. Your dad is a busy man, he deserves the luxury of those dinners after working day and night." You nodded at Megumi, who just pursed his lip before nodding slowly. You don't know what he's thinking, but whatever it is, he's mistaken. He probably thought you were sulking because you're jealous, which is definitely not the case.

"My boyfriend does have those too with his co-workers sometimes. You'll do them too when you start working." You added as if to remind the teenager that you have a boyfriend and whether his dad is seeing someone is none of your concern. You're just thinking about him and his little sister. You can only hope that he bought it and doesn't say anything to his dad.

You knocked on Toji's door and it opened to Megumi with a flower hair clip on his spiky locks. You giggled at his face as the lollipop rolled inside his cheek.

"Did Aimi make you do that?" You laughed, hearing him let out a playful huff. You let yourself in the house, seeing Toji with your daughter sitting on his chest as he lies down on the couch. On television, Ponyo was playing and your daughter was so fascinated that she didn't even notice you came in.

"Oh, you're early today." Toji greeted, lifting Aimi before sitting up. You plopped yourself on the chair across from Megumi and watched Aimi's eyes light up when she finally saw you.

"Mama!" She jumped out of his father's arms to run to you and Toji could only admire the scene in front of him. Is this how it's going to be if you were to come home to him every day? He thought, a small smile making its way to his lips. But not for long as he remembered that you had a boyfriend to welcome at your house.

"Will you go with us tomorrow? To the ice cream shop?" He leaned his elbows on his knees, studying your face, which you had a hard time controlling when you remember what happened last Sunday.

"Not really, why don't you ask Yuka to come?" Megumi's head turned sharply towards you. His eyebrows raised as he stopped nibbling on the lollipop. Did you sound snappy? Toji was also staring at you with his mouth slightly ajar. Yep, you definitely sounded snappy.

"Sorry, it's just, uh, My boyfriend and I are, erm, kinda having problems, you see...My temper's been bad. Sorry again..." You trailed. You didn't really mean to tell them about you and your boyfriend's issues, but you panicked. You don't know what else to say to him after you 've just snarled like that.

"Oh, sorry about that. Uhh, I didn't know." Toji straightened up, licking his lips. What was that? He thought as he tried to find a reason why you brought up Yuka out of all the names. You couldn't be getting jealous. You literally have a boyfriend. Maybe you just remembered Yuka because you saw how she takes care of Aimi.

Toji's thoughts were cut off when you stood up, taking Aimi's bag. There was an exhausted look on your face as you turned Aimi to face him. He thought that whatever it is that you're going through with your boyfriend must be some serious problem if it's tiring you out like that. He'd be happy to give you a shoulder to lean on, but that wouldn't seem right.

"Say bye-bye to Daddy now." You pushed the kid's hair out of her face and tucked it behind her ears. Aimi waved to him, sticking out her lips as she asked for a kiss, which never fails to make Toji laugh. It's the most endearing gesture to him, and he can't help but wonder if you taught her that.

"You know, you could stay for a bit, right? I mean, you look really tired. We could all have dinner here or go out somewhere nice." Toji offered despite his hesitance, to reach out to you and help with your 'relationship problems' with your boyfriend. It's not like he's meddling; he simply wants to help you relax for a bit.

"It's okay really, I just uhm, we'll talk it through tomorrow and maybe I just need some rest tonight." You muttered. You realized that maybe he just wants to spend more time with his daughter and you thought that it wouldn't be bad if she slept over for the night.

"She has clothes here, right?" You adjusted her on your hip, letting her play with your necklace as she mimics the humming tune from the movie they were watching. Aside from giving Toji and her daughter more time together, you figured that since you're leaving early tomorrow to meet with your boyfriend, it'd be easier for the kid to just stay the night instead of waking up early the next morning.

"Yeah, why? She can stay the night?" Toji sounded hopeful, which made you feel more comfortable with the request you're about to make.

"Yes, of course. Plus, I'd also have to leave early tomorrow. I'm going to uh, my boyfriend's place. I think we need to clear something up. I thought maybe instead of waking her up early tomorrow, she can just sleep over tonight." You explained, setting the kid back down. Toji was more than happy for his daughter to stay the night. He wanted to ask if you'd be fine driving alone, but that would seem like he's trying to cross the line. He hated that he couldn't do much for you when you're in this state, but he could only offer so much with his place in your life.

"Yeah, yeah. That'd be great, actually, she has pillows here and stuff too." He chuckled, picking up his daughter to give her a long kiss on the cheek. It made you smile, knowing how much he had prepared for her. He's probably spoiling her with whatever she wants when you're not around, but that's just the pleasure of being a father and you wouldn't dare take that away from him.

"You be a good girl, okay? Don't cry." You poked her nose as you peppered her face with kisses making her hide it, burying it in the crook of his father's neck. "You too, be a good boy!" You teased Megumi as he hugged you.

"Travel safe tomorrow. Let's get ice cream when you come back." He smiled at you, glancing over at Toji as if reminding him that Sunday was ice cream day.

"I'd be back before evening tomorrow. Probably late afternoon." You informed Toji as he walks you out the door. Up until now, you still don't know how to properly say goodbye to home whenever leaving his house. You obviously can't kiss him, and a hug might be too much, so you always just settle with an awkward nod and a 'Bye.'

Tonight was different, though. Before you could step away and do the usual farewell you always give him. Toji pulled you by the waist, taking you by surprise. He doesn't know why he did it, but it seemed like you needed some form of comfort. It was on impulse, but he hoped that you wouldn't misunderstand it as him taking advantage of the crack in your and your boyfriend's relationship.

It took you a whole second before responding with a pat on his back. Toji was about to pull away when your daughter wrapped an arm around your neck and his, locking the three of you in place.

She was giggling, oblivious to the situation of her parents and just enjoying both of their warmth at the same time. Your eyes were fixed on the closed door behind Toji as he chuckled at Aimi, who's still squealing with joy. She's clueless. She's just a toddler and you could only imagine how it would break her when she finally understands everything.

"Mama needs to rest, love. You'll hug her again tomorrow." Toji pulled her away from you along with himself. He was too amused by her daughter's actions to remember the bitter truth about the family that they were trying to give her.

"Sorry about that. You just look really tired." Toji cleared his throat as he took a step away from you, as if suddenly aware of how close you two were to each other. He looked like he got caught stepping over the boundaries. Toji felt like a gun was pointed at his head, preparing himself to be reminded of his role in your life. It never happened. You just said 'thank you' before patting your daughter on the head and getting on your way.

Toji wondered if he'd ever get to hold you like that again.

--------------------------------------------------

Just as planned, you left early in the morning. The air was cold and the little goosebumps that appeared on your skin were getting harder to soothe no matter how hard you tried rubbing on them. Your phone was flooded with pictures of Toji and Aimi from last night.

The little kid seems to be too comfortable sleeping on her father's chest to even worry about her bottle of milk. Megumi sent them to you in hopes that they could make your day and ease your stress. It definitely worked.

You tried to call your boyfriend while you were on the way to his place, but he didn't pick up the phone. You thought that he might still be asleep, so you just left a message saying that you were on your way to his place.

You hoped that you could finally clear up the concerns that he has, whatever they may be. Last night, you evaluated all the situations you had with Toji during the past weeks and you were sure that none of them could be the cause of why your boyfriend was being distant. You also stopped arguing about the co-parenting plan, so what could it be?

The streets are already bustling with people when you reach his place. Some of them nodded at you, seeing that you're back again in the neighborhood, and it made you remember the time that you were living around here. It wasn't a very great time considering the reason why you moved there, but it definitely was a peaceful time. Nobody knew you, nobody asked of what happened to you; nobody judged you.

You knocked on his door three times and you were welcomed by your boyfriend with a towel hanging around his neck. His hair was still wet and you thought that maybe he was just getting ready for his day. The time you spent with each other during the past few weeks was awfully short. If you put them all together, they probably won't even be equal for a day.

"Hey," He kissed your lips as he tugged you by the waist. "I saw your text, what's up?" He said it like he had no idea what was going on, but you know him better than that. You know that he can keep some things to himself just to protect your peace of mind. It has happened before, but for some reason, this one bothered you to an extent. You feel like you need to be the one to talk it out of him.

"I missed you," You wrapped your arms around his neck as you inhaled his scent. Your mind took you to last night when Toji pulled you in for a hug and you couldn't comprehend if it was guilt or butterflies that you were feeling in your stomach. The only reason you gave yourself for not pulling back is because your daughter pulled you back.

"Missed you too." He kissed your lips and pulled you onto the couch, his lips moving in sync with yours and caressing your waist before pulling away and staring at your face. This silence was unsettling. You don't know what he's thinking, but you could tell that he's got a gist of why you came here.

"You must've been really busy. Are you taking care of yourself?" You asked him softly, trying to start it as calmly as possible. You don't want this to end in a fight. Especially not when you won't be able to stay here for long. You just want to ensure that you're fine and that he's just really busy.

"Hmmm, I do." He answered, taking your hand in his and kissing it. His kiss lingered on your skin as if he was taking his time. "What about you? How's Aimi?" He asked, pulling you by the back of your neck to once again lock his lips with yours. You hummed in the kiss as you tried to tell him that you were both doing good.

"We're not having any problems, right?" You got straight to it as you pulled away. You want to know what is wrong so you can fix it immediately. He's an important person in your life and if anything, you want to solve things with him as long as you can.

"Do you…do you think of Toji when you're with me?" You thought that he'd be the one startled by your questions if you suddenly said them to him. Turns out, your initial guesses were correct. He's been hiding his worries from you again.

"Babe—" You started, but he cut you off by giving your hand a gentle squeeze and a sigh.

"The reason why I was so against you and him meeting again was because I know that you still have feelings for him." He explained, and you tried to deny yourself everything that you knew all too well. You tried to deny all your suspicions. You tried to deny all the signs that your heart's been telling you.

"It's been three years. You know it's not like that anymore." You don't understand why you keep refusing to accept everything when it's clear to you. All that time that you spent with your boyfriend, not once has Toji not crossed your mind. Even just for a split second. In all those moments you shared with your boyfriend, there was not a single one of them when you didn't think about how it would feel like if Toji was the one with you.

You feared that you made your boyfriend feel how Toji made you feel back then too. And he doesn't deserve it. He's not the perfect boyfriend, but he doesn't deserve that. You feared that you called Toji's name in your sleep, too. You feared that you moaned Toji's name instead of his when you made love. You feared that you were just using him in your desperate attempts to forget.

"Don't you remember calling me by his name when you're so lost in the feeling?" His laugh was sad, but there was a hint of acceptance in it. He just confirmed your thoughts. There's nothing to deny anymore. You don't know what to say, but you know what to do. If you're going to put him through this, then you might as well just not be with him. You might as well just not get into any relationships because… why? So, you can put them through the same pain you went through?

"I know that you cared for me, Y/N. I don't have doubts about that. I know that you really saw me as a part of your life. You even remember all the things I like." He held your face in his hands, attempting to console you and stop the endless river of tears falling from your eyes.

"I know that you can love me if you really want to." He pecked your forehead, "But I don't think you're ready to love someone else, Y/N. And that's alright." He continued and you felt terrible for putting him through this. It's not just because of what he has done for you. But because of how good he is for you.

Yet, you cannot bring yourself to fully love him.

"I'm sorry…" You repeatedly chanted the same two words as if it were a spell that could magically take away his pain. But they didn't, and you know when he pulled you close to his chest, whispering.

"I want to say that I'll wait for you, Y/N. But there's already someone doing that."

You know who he's talking about. But is Toji still waiting for you when he finally found someone who could be by his side? When he finally found someone good enough to take away his thoughts of you?

You stayed like that for a while, reveling in the comfort of each other as you prepare yourself to part. His chest was warm against your cheek and the steady sound of his heartbeat served as your support as your mind raced with countless thoughts about the timeline of your relationship.

You were unconsciously searching for Toji in every piece of your boyfriend all this time.

"I didn't know that I was putting you through the same thing I suffered from. You don't deserve it." You stood in front of his house, ready to leave it for the last time. You didn't know that an unplanned visit could lead to this. You thought you'd just be talking your problems through. You were clueless about how deeply rooted it was.

"It's not the same. He's alive and he's waiting for you. I can never compare the pain you felt with mine. I will never be able to fathom how painful it is to be compared to someone who isn't even within reach anymore." You felt bad that he's still the one comforting you after you broke his heart. As much as you hate to admit it, you know that he's right when he said that you cannot love someone else yet. His words gave you a better understanding of what you felt when you saw Toji with someone else.

You didn't lie when you said that your boyfriend made you feel that you were the only woman in his heart. You didn't lie when you said that he made you feel comfortable and valid. You didn't lie when you said that he made you feel happy. But the problem is you can never give him back those same things, even if you try. You want to, but you can't. Your heart wouldn't let you because it longs for someone else.

When you drove away, you had to stop the car a couple of times just to clear the tears from your eyes. You even stopped by a convenience store to get something to drink to clear your mind, telling yourself that you had to hold back just until you get home. It was a futile attempt to stop the growing crack in your heart.

So, it's been him all along. You thought as you cried out to the steering wheel. How are you supposed to fix your situation with him now that he might be seeing someone else? Why are you always wrong-timing?

You're phone vibrated and fate must be truly playing with you because the caller is ‘none other than Toji. You stared at the screen and wondered if you'd answer him like this or just let it slide to voicemail. You picked the former when you remembered that your daughter is with him and it's not good if he's calling because of an emergency.

"Yeah?" You responded, wiping your nose and trying your best to sound normal. It won't work on Toji, though.

"What's wrong? Where are you?" The sound of his voice was all it took for you to break down on the phone. You've heard it countless times, but it sounded more familiar to you now. Like you've been playing deaf all this time, and now that you've finally accepted it, you're being pulled towards it; harder than gravity ever did.

"It's ok, I'm on my way home." Toji, on the other line, had his brows furrowed. The moment you answered the phone, he can already tell that you've been crying and there's no way that he's going to let you drive like that.

"Where are you, Y/N? I'm not letting you drive like that. Stop and stay where you are." You could then hear him talking to Megumi about looking after Aimi and a couple of rustles before you heard the door slam shut. You don't really want him coming here right now to see you in this state, but what can you do when your whole being is aching for his presence?

"Y/N," You heard him call you again and you told him where you are. Too much has happened in half a day and you don't even know if you'll be able to tell Toji about it.

Can you tell him that you and your boyfriend broke up because you're still thinking of him? Can you tell him that you and your boyfriend broke up because, after all this time, Toji was still the one in your mind and heart? How will you do that when you know that there's a possibility that he's seeing someone else now?

You don't want to ruin things for him.

You sobbed in your hands as the rain started to pour outside. The skies are agreeing with your heart's deepest emotions. It was dark and the storm outside was violent and rough. The visibility is almost zero. The beautiful morning light was long gone and covered by the darkest and thickest of clouds. Like how everything turned upside down for you once again. You spent your three years making yourself believe that you're moving on when all that you ever did was try everything to shun the lingering feelings in your chest.

They never went away. You were just ignoring them.

Taps on your window brought you out of your mind as you rushed to open it. Toji hurriedly got in, drenched by the rain and a concerned look was plastered on his features. His clothes are soaked and you wondered if he took a cab here.

"Where's your car?" You asked him as you watched droplets of water from his hair. He looked more distressed than how you expected him to look.

"What happened?" He ignored your questions as he watched you stand up a bit to reach out for your bag to find a towel or anything that he could wipe his face and hair with. He grabbed your wrists as you looked at him with quivering lips and tears that were continuously falling down from your eyes.

He's fucking beautiful. You thought as he stared deep into your eyes. Now that you're all bare without a shield in front of him, all the emotions and feelings that you were trying to ignore are rushing out, clawing at your heart as they miserably try to make way for their existence to be known and recognized.

"I took a cab here. Now, tell me. What happened?" Toji knows that it's not his business to mind anymore. But seeing you like this turned a switch inside him that made him feel like he needs to protect you even if you don't want it. Even if he's not in the place to do that anymore.

"Did he hurt you? What did he do?" His mind flew to your boyfriend, who you are with this morning and figured that whatever is happening got something to do with him. He swears that if he fucking laid a hand on you, he won't hesitate to turn back and drive to his house, even in that weather just to break his jaw.

"No, he didn't hurt me." You spoke in a quiet, high-pitched voice, trying to contain your cries as Toji's damp hands started to get warm on the skin of your wrist. You wanted to explain everything to him. You simply can't find a place to start.

"You don't have to tell me if you feel uncomfortable," His grip on your arm loosen as he starts to pull away. Hurt was evident in his eyes as he looked down, the space between you becoming visible again as he thought that you were distancing yourself from him.

You were quick to grab it back, holding his hand in yours. His eyebrows were pulled together as his worry for you doubled. He was glad that you're finding solace in your touch. And if that's all you need from him right now, he'd be more than glad to give it to you. He sighed, squeezing your hand every few seconds to help you calm down. The look on your face made his heart race as his mind goes haywire, thinking about what could've happened.

"We broke up." You spoke after a couple of minutes of silence. Can I ask why? Toji asked himself as he thought of how to respond to you. He doesn't know what an ex should do or ask in this situation. He looked at your face and found you already looking at him. There was a small light in your eyes, one that you used to have before everything changed; the little light it held before he fucked things up.

"Sorry…"Toji started, struggling to string the right words together. He's never been good at this in the first place. He's not good with words, but he can only show you. But right now he can't pull you to him because he's drenched and you'll only end up getting cold too.

"Look, I know it hurts, Y/N. But it'll be fine. You'll get over him." He patted you on the back lightly. He knows that he wasn't saying the right things when your sobs got harder. He was reminded of the day you left his house. Three years ago and he wondered if this was how you looked back then. You probably had to stop in the middle of the road, too, because of the tears that were blurring your vision.

It's a heartbreaking sight.

"Did you feel like this when I left you?" You asked him and he was surprised. He doesn't know where the question came from. You asked it like you broke up with your boyfriend for similar reasons.

"What?" Toji thought of all the possible ways. Was your boyfriend in love with someone else? Did he get back together with an ex? He omitted the possibility of you being the inflictor of the pain because he doesn't think you can do that. You were happy with your boyfriend, right?

"He said I wasn't ready to love someone else yet…" You kept your eyes down, staring at your trembling hands. Toji thought he was hearing things for a second.

"What?" He repeated, focusing on the movements and sounds that escape your mouth. He didn't know that his imagination could run this wild when he was desperately hoping for something to happen.

"He said I called out your name…" You trailed, gathering the courage to look up at his shining eyes. A mix of hope and confusion was glimmering in them. You don't know if it's because he's not believing you or if it's because he cannot reciprocate your feelings anymore, now that he already has someone else.

You looked back down, feeling your chest tighten at the thought of it being a little too late. It suddenly became your worst fear. Nothing will change even if you realize the intensity of your feelings for Toji. You'd be the one watching from the sidelines now that he's finally found a woman for him.

You weren't crying for your now-ex-boyfriend. You were crying for Toji.

Larger droplets of tears escaped your eyes as you thought of how cruel fate was to you. You were about to open your mouth and say sorry to Toji when his cold, large hands cupped your face and the next thing you knew was how your lips hungrily moved against his. It was heated right from the start. All the frustrations, heartbreak, yearning, and desperation poured out in the form of fervent kisses.

"What about Yuka?" That was the first sentence you spoke when you pulled away. Toji's eyes looked at you quizzically when he heard the question escape your lips.

"What about her?" He panted, genuinely clueless as to what your question meant. Did you think Yuka was his girlfriend or something closer than a friend? You averted your gaze from him as you now sat on his lap, not minding his cold and wet clothes.

"She's my boss's secretary, dating the chairman's son. They announced their engagement, that's why they invited us to dinner last Sunday." Your face turned red at the realization that he noticed your sulky mood last Sunday. Then, were you just imagining the way he looked at her?

"I thought she…I just thought you looked at her some type of way…" Toji chuckled, kissing your hands. Your skin tingled at where he kissed it. It was one of the things you missed a lot about him.

"Some type of way? So, you were observing me?" He teased, kissing your neck and collar bones before pausing. You couldn't be more embarrassed, thinking about how your jealousy caused you to over-analyze everything.

"You were jealous," Toji whispered, nibbling at your bottom lip as his hands traveled around your body. You felt him slip one inside your shirt, caressing your waist as his lips left open-mouthed kisses on your jaw.

You relished the feeling of his mouth on your skin. It all felt new and familiar at the same time. He felt new and familiar at the same time.

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When you got to Toji's house, Megumi was carrying a sobbing Aimi. The little girl was hugging her brother as her lips quivered, eyes glistening with tears.

"Oh no, why is my Aimi crying?" Toji cooed as he rushed past them to change his wet clothes.

"She was looking for the both of you." Megumi chuckled, hugging Aimi as she calmed down at the sight of you and Toji. "She can probably feel that something was wrong, that's why she was restless too." He bounced her up and down until she stopped sobbing altogether.

"I can't carry you yet, love, I got soaked by the rain too." You talked to the kid apologetically as she leaned her head on Megumi's shoulder as she sucked on her finger. "Let me change first, okay?" You tried to comfort her. The toddler nodded, giving you a small smile.

Somehow, the house looked brighter than before. The colors looked more vibrant and the atmosphere felt calmer than before. It didn't feel like the house, you and Toji shared three years ago. It's like a layer of wall and dust has crumbled down, and now the windows are as clear as the water, with the light bathing the carpeted floors.

For the first time, in all the years that you lived here, the sun was shining down on you; covering you in its warmth and casting you its light. You're not a blurred figure in the background anymore, and Toji's eyes were the proof, as he stared at you from the staircase.

He's looking at you and he's seeing you; you and not anyone else.

He was shirtless as he walked down the stairs with a towel in hand. Megumi gave him a puzzled look as he wrapped it around your shoulders. Toji gave him a wink before pulling you upstairs, leaving his son with an open mouth.

"What is going on?!" He called out from the bottom of the stairs, making Toji laugh.

"She's back home, 'Gumi!" Toji answered back before pulling you to his room. He kissed your lips as he locked the door. Sitting you on the bed before reaching over to the bedside drawer. It was one of the things in this house that gave you painful memories and, Toji was determined to change that.

He covered your eyes as he went back to kissing you, not getting enough of its softness and taste as his tongue licked over your bottom lip. You don't know what it is that he took out of the drawer, but when you felt him slip it on your fingers, you almost broke down.

"I'm sorry I took so long, love. I'm sorry for making you wait." He whispered against your lips. Happy tears escaped your eyes as you let him prove himself to you.

This time, he'll see you as you are.

He'll take you as you are.

With open arms.

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nanaslutt · 16 days

Text

you wanna watch?

ʚ synopsis: things get hot and heavy between you and toji after a job and shiu is forced to witness, only when Shiu accidentally crosses a line, Toji isn’t opposed

ʚ pairing: Toji x reader x Shiu

ʚ cont: fem reader, threesome, manhandling, choking, public, car sex, voyeurism, fingering, dirty talk, spit roast, deepthroating, throatfucking, squirting, unprotected sex, teasing

MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DNI (18+)

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ

You feel the cold brick wall shock your skin as Toji presses his body firmly against yours, his hands massaging your ass as he hurriedly presses his knee between your thighs. You gasp into his mouth, your eyebrows furrowing together at his rough treatment of your body. The two of you had just finished up a particularly rough and strenuous mission, and the end of the fight had been quite the adrenaline rush.

The two of you were left breathing heavily together in the dark warehouse room, your opponents out cold on the floor around you. Toji had shocked you out of your stupor when he grabbed you from behind and wrapped his hand around the bottom half of your face, forcing you to turn your head to the side and kiss him hungrily. You felt dizzy as he gave you no chance to breathe between kisses while he stole the limited air you had just started gathering back into your lungs.

Toji's neediness quickly affected you, making you feel dizzy and lightheaded with lust as you spun your body around in his grasp and allowed him to wrap you in his arms. At some point, one of you had contacted Shiu and let him know the mission was over, followed by your current location. You had no idea how the two of you made it outside of the stuffy warehouse though, but somehow you did.

Your lips had not separated from each other's skin once, even as you messaged Shiu. The adrenaline running through your veins made you feel like you were high, combined with Toji's haste and blatant show of need for you, you were quickly going dumb. You almost felt possessed by how instinctual your actions were. You gasped and whined into Toji's mouth as he used the grip he had on your ass to drag your sopping cunt back and forth along his thigh, stimulating your clit just right.

Toji abruptly pulled his lips off of yours and hunched his back a bit so he could dip his head into the crook of your neck. You tipped your head back agaisnt the wall on instinct as Toji got to work, his sharp teeth scraping and pulling against your skin as he sucked and licked on your soft neck, his hot breath tickling you sending goosebumps down your spine.

You gasped into the air when Toji grabbed your ass more firmly and made you drag your cunt harder down on his leg, stimulating your cunt more. "Tojii," You whined breathlessly, your eyes falling shut from arousal as he continued the same motion over and over again, making sure you really felt the hard muscle of his thigh against your pussy through the layer of clothes the both of you wore.

Toji's cock throbbed in the confines of his pants as you cried out for him. The large man thrust his hips against yours at the same time he pulled your ass against him, forcing his knee further between your legs which allowed his cock to rub against your lower tummy each time you humped his leg. "Yeah, keep sayin' my name," Toji growled agaisnt your neck, emphasizing his words with a teasing bite right under your ear, making you gasp and repeat his name again.

Toji didn't bother trying to hide his arousal from you, it was obvious how worked up he already was. "Gonna fuck you the second we get in Shiu's car." He whispered, lifting his head from the crook of your neck to speak into your ear. You shivered at his words, not knowing if he was bluffing or not. "You want that? You want me inside you?" He teased, biting the shell of your ear as he took in all of your delicious sounds.

You nodded drunkenly, barely being able to pay attention to the words he was saying as he got you off on his thigh. You felt the knot in your stomach tie itself tighter and tighter the longer he dragged you against his thigh. "Feels good gettin' off like this huh?" Toji asked, reaching one of his hands in front of you to grab your chin, keeping the distance between your lips a hair length away as he forced you to look at him as you nodded, eyes lidded and furrowed in pleasure.

"You look so horny and I've barely touched you." Toji smiled, the scar on his lip stretching as his lips parted to show his teeth. "Barely touched you" Yeah right, he was overwhelming your senses and making you unable to feel anything but him and him alone. "Touch me more than." You retorted, making his smile grow wider as he shook his head at you. "So dirty." He whispered against your lips before they were back on you again, rougher this time.

Toji quickly overpowered you by crushing his jaw into yours, his fingers sliding down your face and making their way to your neck teasingly. "Choke m-," you were able to mumble out between his aggressive kisses. Toji felt his cock twitch at your request as he settled his hand on the bottom of your neck. He let his thick fingers slide up your skin and wrap around your neck before squeezing tightly. The moment you felt his hand constrict around your neck, you felt your muscles relax, your whole body going lax to his domineering touch.

"Oh, you like that huh?" Toji groaned, feeling your hips stutter against his thigh the moment he tightened his hand around your neck. Drool spilled out from the corner of your mouth as Toji forced his tongue against yours, crushing you. All you could do was let him manhandle your body as he forced pleasure onto you, making you go dumb.

The sudden honk of a loud, blaring car horn made you jump in his hold, your hands instinctively pushing Toji's chest back, putting the smallest of distance between the two of you as your lips disconnected. Instead of reacting surprised at how you had, the corner of Toji's lip curled in annoyance. "How long are you gonna make me watch this shit?" Shiu yelled from the car parked on the side of the road you and Toji were on.

The smell of cigarettes hit your nose only a second later, the telltale sign that Shiu was here. Toji pulled his thigh back from between your legs, which you silently mourned as he turned around and shoved one of his hands in his pockets, a smug look on his face. "Why would I bother worrying about a man when I'm hooking up with my girlfriend," Toji said snarkily. Shiu shook his head and blew the smoke from his cig out of the car before bringing the bud back inside and crushing it against the ashtray. "Get in the car," Shiu said in faux annoyance as he tipped his head at the two of you.

You felt your face heat up after getting caught by your boyfriend's friend, and the man responsible for giving you assignments, the man you saw almost every single day. You walked behind Toji on shaky legs, gripping his hand tightly as he led you to the car closely behind him. Shui was facing forward now, presumably staring at the road as Toji opened the door for you and watched you crawl inside. You yelped in surprise when Toji smacked your ass as you stood to get in the car, the man giggling at his own actions.

You briefly glanced at the mirror attached to the outside of the car, and you could swear you caught Shiu staring at you as you got in. Though you must've been mistaken, because the second you blinked, his eyes were forward again, staring at the road as he waited for the two of you to get situated in the back.

You were just about to buckle yourself into the car when the door slammed shut behind Toji and his large frame grew closer and closer. "Cmere." He said as he leaned forward and placed his arms on either side of your body, forcing you to lean back against the window of the car, your legs outstretched in front of you as Toji pressed his body against yours. "Toji-" You placed your hands on his chest in front of you and pushed weakly against him as he crashed his lips onto yours, drowning out your whines.

You made a muffled sound of surprise as he moved his lips hungrily on yours, seemingly paying no mind to the fact that Shiu was in the front seat, barely three feet away from the two of you. "The two of you are like goddamn bunnies." Shiu cursed, his eyes watching the scene unfold in the back of his car. Toji slid his hand up your thigh, settling it on your lower back before he pulled you towards him so your body was now lying fully across all three seats of Shiu's car.

Toji pressed himself between your legs firmly, your thighs squeezing around his body instinctually as he smothered you with his massive frame. You wanted to protest, tell him to hold off until the two of you got home, but his persistent lips showed no signs of letting up. Your hands slid from his chest to wrap around his neck as you tried your best to keep up with his mouth against yours.

Shiu tried his hardest to ignore the grunting and heavy breathing in the backseat for his own sake, but it was hard when the girl he had been finding himself attracted to recently was in the backseat getting overwhelmed with a man twice her size as she whimpered and whined into his lips. "Are you really going to do this here?" Shiu asked, gripping the steering wheel in front of him with too much strength as he shut his eyes tightly, praying for his cock to stay down.

"What does it look like?" Toji said cockily, his lips leaving yours with a vulgar smacking noise. Shiu sighed under his breath, giving the mirror one last glance at the two of you before he rolled up his window and turned on the car. "Toji- maybe we should wait," You tried to reason when he let up the attack on your lips to focus on your neck. "Yeah? You sayin' that when you're humping me right now?" Toji said, bringing his face in front of yours as he looked at you with a smirk.

"Shiu is right there…" You said, looking his way out of the corner of your eye in embarrassment before you looked back at him. Your bashfulness only spurred Toji on more. His hand came up from your thigh to grip your neck tightly, knowing how much of a rise that action got out of you. Sure enough, your lips parted in a wide O, your eyebrows furrowed in pleasure, and your thighs squeezed around him. You pulled your arms back from around his neck to grab his wrist of the hand that grabbed your throat.

"You worried about him being here?" Toji asked in a seemingly sincere voice, tilting his head at you. You squeezed your thighs around his body again and shook your head, choking high-pitched breaths leaving your lips as you tried to fight your arousal for the sake of how embarrassed you felt. "Yeah? I think you like it." Toji said, his lips spreading in a grin.

You had to admit, that Shiu watching you did fill your body with a sense of warmth you had never felt before. You couldn't deny that Shiu was attractive either. His large hands, the way he smoked, his deep, brooding voice, the way he bantered with Toji--all of it. But still, the thought of him watching you made you want to shy away.

Shiu felt his body go rigid at Toji's words. He was thankful for the red light he was currently stopped at or he might've accidentally slammed on the brakes in the middle of the road. There was no way you were enjoying his presence right now right? Why would Toji say that? Surely he was just teasing to get you riled up, nothing more.

Although Shiu tried to reason with himself in his head all the ways in which Toji was just being an asshole and you were in fact not liking Shiu being present for this, he was just a man after all, and his cock was having a hard time thinking of anything other than you enjoying him being present while Toji gets you off.

Toji smirked as you stayed silent, unable to refute his words. The pressure around your neck got tighter when Toji slid his other hand from your waist down between your thighs. He slid himself back only a couple of inches, giving him room to press his thick fingers agaisnt your cunt. He tipped his chin up and opened his mouth in a smile when you gasped, your hands around his wrist tightening.

Shiu swallowed hard at the pornographic moan that spilled from your lips, his hand not on the wheel digging into his thigh as he tried to will his boner to go down. The driver was unable to stop his eyes from dragging up to the rearview mirror to get a peak of the two of you every so often as he was driving. He knew he should pay more attention to the road, but he was finding it harder than usual to focus for obvious reasons.

As he pulled up to a stop sign, he paused for longer than necessary--way longer than necessary. Shiu's breath picked up as he tried to watch Toji rub your clothed cunt as he choked you out, unfortunately, your leg was blocking him from seeing the full scene, but his imagination could fill in the rest of it.

You tried to snap your legs together to slow down his fast and aggressive touch between your thighs, but his large body your legs wrapped around stopped you in your tracks. Toji found your clit with expert precision and bit hit bottom lip between his teeth when he watched your chest swell as you gasped deeply. "Right here?" Toji whispered, an almost inaudible sound against your lips. His voice sounded soft, and tender, like he was genuinely curious if he was touching you where you needed him the most.

Shiu had been stuck in a trance at the stopsign for almost a minute, just watching the two of you hook up in his backseat. He felt his hand ache to touch himself through his pants, anything, just a little relief so he didnt explode in his pants untouched. A shock ran through Shiu's entire body when he adjusted his eyes up a mere millimeter and made contact with Toji's. Shiu felt his heart race in his chest, he had been caught, he just gotten caught ogling Toji's girlfriend.

The honking of an irritated driver behind him fully shocked him out of his stupor. His eyes fell forward back on the road as he pulled out from the four-way, taking a left turn. "Seems like you and my girlfriend are on the same track, huh Shiu?" Toji teased, referring to your arousal at Shiu being present. Shiu usually knew when Toji was irritated or not, but right now, he couldn't get a clear read on him at all.

Was he mad at him for watching? "Sorry man, kinda hard not to get distracted." Shiu settled on responding, his heart still beating out of his chest. He managed to keep his expression relatively calm, giving no sign of anxiety away. Toji smirked at his response, his eyes finding Yorus once more, his hand squeezing tighter around your neck. "I don't blame you," Toji responded, thrusting his cock against your inner thigh as he rubbed your clothed cunt, feeling how you throbbed through your shorts and panties. "She's fucking hot."

Toji's words made you blush. Part of you wanted Shiu to respond, to agree with Toji, but another part knew that couldn't happen, he was just teasing. "I said she's hot, huh? That why you were looking at her?" Toji pressed. You swallowed hard, your hands tightening on Toji's wrist, you had no idea where he was going with this. Toji cocked his head to the side and gave you a grin when you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion.

"That's your girlfriend, man," Shiu responded, his answer leaving you a bit dejected, which Toji instantly picked up on. "Aww, you made her sad," Toji replied, sliding his fingers up from your cunt to work on your short buttons with one hand, all the while keeping his eyes on yours. You felt your body run hot, almost like lava was running through your veins.

Toji felt himself throb as he watched your mouth open and close like a fish out of the water as he quickly unbuttoned and unzipped your shorts. "Spread your legs for me," Toji instructed quietly, praising you when you listened almost instantly. Toji pulled your shorts down a couple of inches before he slid his massive hand into your pants and started rubbing your sopping clit with a few fingers, making you tip your head back against the car seat, your eyes rolling back in your head.

"She looks so fucking good right now." Toji bated, trying to get Shiu to look at you through the mirror. And sure enough, it worked. Shiu found Toji's eyes first, as they locked on each other for a moment before they were back on the road. "I'm not gonna kill you for looking at her." Toji laughed while rubbing his fingers quickly against your clit, making you gasp and whine loudly into the small space of the car.

"It's not that. I'm kinda driving." Shiu responded cockily, licking his lips as your moans melted his brain, his cock throbbing against the confines of his too-tight slacks. "Pull over," Toji responded quickly, making both you and Shiu look at him in surprise. "You don't mind if I show Shiu how you cum on my fingers, right?" Toji whispered against your mouth, shaking his head.

You felt your cunt throb at his words, was this seriously going to happen? Shiu on the other hand, did not need to be told twice. He wasn't even thinking that his actions could be seen as being too eager, he was only a man, and he wasn't about to take a chance on not seeing you get fucked on Toji's fingers. Shiu's left leg bounced up and down on the floor of the car as he drove through the dark city, trying to find a secluded enough spot for him to pull over and hide the car, but your moans were proving to be quite distracting. He was surprised he hadn't run a red light by now.

You felt that telltale ache between your thighs, begging to be filled by something. "Toji.." You whined, your voice strained due to his grip on your throat. Toji leaned down to your face and kissed the corner of your lips teasingly, pulling away only a hair's length to look you in the eyes. Your brows were furrowed and your eyes were glassy with lust as you looked at him, thrusting your hips agaisnt his hand.

"Put them in." You begged, your breath ticking his lips. Toji felt his cock throb, a bead of precum dripping on the inside of his boxers. "Gotta wait for Shiu to pull over baby, promised him a show." You wanted to groan at his request. Maybe it was the adrenaline from the fight or the fact that you were about to be watched, but you were feeling more impatient than usual. "Please." You whined back, thrusting your hips harder up against him, trying to get his fingers to slide lower down your cunt.

Your mouth fell open in a wider O when Toji squeezed his hand around your neck, cutting your airflow off completely. "Be patient." He whispered before relaxing his hand again, allowing you to take air into your lungs once again. Yours and Toji's bodies rocked with the car as it was finally put into park. Toji glanced up from your face and was met with thick trees, covering the car. "Nice spot." He praised Shiu as he heard the clicking of a seatbelt buckle.

Toji let go of your throat completely as he sat back on the seat behind him, his fingers pulling out from your panties completely, leaving you an aching mess. Toji spread his legs and tipped his head at you as you lay legs spread with disheveled clothes against the back of the car. You felt a pair of eyes on you, ones other than Toji's that sent a chill down your spine. Looking up, your eyes met with Shiu's through the mirror in the center of the car.

His gaze was unwavering, much different to how he reacted to when Toji had caught him. "Come up here, thought you wanted my fingers inside you." Toji teased, patting his thigh. Your eyes found his face, breaking the contact with Shiu as you pushed yourself up on shaky arms and crawled toward Toji. You were about to swing your leg over Toji's lap when he stopped you with a heavy hand on your thigh, his dark eyes boring into yours.

"Other way baby, face Shiu." He instructed. You swallowed hard as you nodded, turning yourself around so your back was to Toji's as you sat on his lap. Toji scooted the two of you over once you were situated so you were more in the middle of the car than the side, giving Shiu a better view. Shiu had not made any effort to turn his body, or even move a muscle since he stopped the car.

He sad ridged as ever against the driver's seat, only peeking in the rearview mirror every so often to see what was happening amongst the shuffling of clothes. "What the fuck is going on, seriously." Shiu sighed, his head falling forward onto the steering wheel when he watched Toji spread your legs over his forearms in the rearview mirror, the sight making his heart beat out of his chest.

You shut your eyes when Toji pressed a kiss to the side of your cheek before you nuzzled your head in the crook of his neck in embarrassment, your inner thoughts voicing the same question as Shiu's outer ones. You gasped when Toji spread his legs and adjusted himself under you, his hips thrusting agaisnt your ass as he slouched down a bit, getting himself comfortable. "What you tellin' me you don't wanna see this?" Toji voices, rubbing his thick fingers over your warm cunt through your clothes.

You gasped into Toji's neck, your hips rutting against his fingers of their on volition. "Why do you want me to watch this shit?" Shiu clarified, his deep voice making your pussy clench around nothing. Toji licked his lips and pressed his fingers harder against your clothed mound, feeling how you were already soaking your clothes from how aroused you were. He grinned, taking a moment to find Shiu's eyes in the mirror before he responded, "Because you wanna fuck my girl, don't you?" Toji asked, more of a statement than a question.

You could feel a new tenseness run through the car at Toji's declaration, especially when Shiu made no move to refute his words. "I see the way you look at her, I'm not an idiot." Toji continued. You rubbed your head deeper into your boyfriend's neck, wishing his skin would absorb you and take you away from his horribly tense conversation right now. Only the air wasn't tense in the way it should've been. TOji hated when anyone who wasn't him checked you out, or even glanced in your general direction. But for some reason, the air felt hot, aroused, and you could feel Toji's cock twitching under your ass as he spoke.

"So you're gonna make me watch you fuck her? Kinda mean don't you think?" Shiu finally responded, his answer sending a shiver down your spine. Toji breathed a laugh through his nose at Shiu's answer, before he dropped your legs and pulled your shorts and panties off your legs in one fell swoop, exposing your cunt to the humid air of the car. Toji watched Shiu's eyes drop from his to your bare cunt as Toji held your legs open again, spreading you wide for Shiu to see.

"Is that a problem?" Toji asked, watching how Shiu licked his lips and gripped his thigh in support. You were so wet already, your slick had started dripping down your cunt from how worked up you are. Shiu couldn't help but wonder if any of that arousal was from him. Shiu swallowed whatever saliva was left in his dry mouth as he watched with hawk eyes as Toji brought his massive hand back down between your thighs to rub a few fingers over your twitching clit.

"You want Shiu to watch you cum on my fingers, baby?" Toji whispered against the side of your face, his cock throbbing against your ass. Your back arched involuntarily against him as he rubbed you just right. Shiu watched with bated breath as your face contorted in pleasure and you whined from Tojis fingers. You nodded at your boyfriend's words, not finding it in you to speak, finding it too humiliating to admit you liked this.

"See? Even she wants you to watch." Toji laughed, rubbing his fingers in fat circles over your whole cunt, stopping at your hole every once in a while to tease a few thick fingers against your entrance, but never pushing them in. "Come back here, can barely see shit from that dirty ass mirror," Toji said to Shiu, speaking almost too calmly for someone who was currently getting his girlfriend off with a massive hardon in front of his friend.

Shiu shook his head and cursed under his breath as he opened the driver's door to his car and stepped out, slamming it a little too hard behind him. The cool air did wonders on chilling his ridiculously warm skin, unfortunately, though it was doing little to calm his raging boner. Shiu ran his hand through his hair and wiped his hand over his mouth, contemplating the small decisions he made that got him into this situation.

After taking his sweet time to walk around the car to the opposite side of the car, he opened the door and felt his heart jump when he was immediately met with the sound of you whining and crying as Toji squeezed his hand around your throat while he fingerfucked you on his lap. Shiu's eyes went wide as he watched the scene unfold in front of him.

Adrenaline rushed through his body at the thought of someone hearing how loud you were being. In a split-second decision, Shiu jumped inside the car and slammed the door shut behind him faster than he opened it. The man leaned over to you and pressed his hand against your mouth, his heart racing when the car became quieter, your moans muffled, and he realized what he had just done.

Toji slowed his fingers inside you and raised his eyebrows at Shiu. "Didn't know I invited you to join." HE said cockily, raising his eyebrows at the other man. Your whins into Shiu's hand wet his skin from how hot your breath was against it. Shiu's eyes darkened as he made contact with your wet ones, who looked at him pleadingly, almost like you were asking for help. The wetness on your thighs and Toji's told him exactly how hard Toji had fingerfucked you in only a few seconds he had been gone for.

"She was being fucking loud. You might not care, but we're still in public." Shiu said before retracting his hand away from your mouth. You whined at the loss, the feeling of his large, heavy hand pressing tightly over your mouth had made you squeeze down like a vice on Toji's cock at how unexpected and domineering his touch had been. Toji looked down at you from behind his lashes and saw how intently you were looking at Shiu.

He really wasn't planning on taking it this far, but if you wanted him so bad, who was he to deny you? "Yeah you're right, she is loud huh?" Toji agreed, emphasizing his words by squeezing his large hand tighter around your throat, making you tip your head back onto his shoulder. "Why don't you shut her up again?" Toji suggested. His fingers picked up their speed after he spoke, seemingly giving Shiu a reason to shut you up as your moans instantly increased in volume.

Shiu's hand twitched with restraint in front of him as his lips parted slightly, aroused breaths leaving his lips as he watched you go dumb on Toji's fingers. Slur after slur of Toji's name and curses fell from your lips as he pistoned his fingers in and out of you, curling them perfectly against your gummy walls, rubbing the tips right on your sweet spot. "Oh my god- f-fuck oh my-" Your curses were cut short when Shiu scooted his body closer to the two of you and pressed his hand against your mouth, his fingers and thumb wrapped around your jaw as he gripped the bottom half of your face harshly.

Your eyes rolled back in your head at the feeling of Shiu's large hand, just as big as Toji's suffocating you. "She just got so fucking tight," Toji growled, thrusting his hips up against your ass impatiently. "Yeah?" Shiu responded, gaining more confidence as his arousal flooded his mind. "Yeah, the little wore loves bein' manhandled, huh?" Toji cooed at you, pursing his lips around his teeth as he stilled his fingers to the base against your cunt and curled them repeatedly.

You tried to thrash your head side to side at the feeling of the intense heat building up in your stomach, but Toji and Shiu's grips on your face kept you steady, just fighting them as you tried not to make a mess in Shiu's car. "She gonna cum?" Shiu asked, noticing how antsy and twitchy you got, combined with your eyes that fought to stay forward in their sockets.

"Yeah, think she's gonna make a mess," Toji said. The way the two men were talking about you like you weren't there somehow made the feeling of arousal grow tenfold. "'S fine, make a mess. The car can be cleaned, just let it out." Shiu said, nodding strongly as he looked deep into your eyes. Your eyebrows knit tightly together and you whined against Shiu's hand as Toji's fingers fucked you right up to the edge of your orgasm.

"C'mon baby, cum all over my fingers, show Shiu how good you are for me." Toji praised, talking you through it as he mumbled his words against your ear, his deep voice being the last thread you needed to push you over the edge. Your legs strained against Toji's arms that held them open as your body curled in on yourself and you came on his fingers, a gush of wetness squirting from your cunt and making a mess on Toji's and the car seat beneath you.

"Oh shit." Shiu groaned, his fingers curling tighter around your mouth as he watched you cum, unable to stop himself from gripping his hard-on through his pants and squeezing, trying to alleviate some of the arousal he was feeling. "Dirty girl," Toji groaned, whistling at the mess you made all over him. "That was a big one huh?" You fought to catch your breath by simply breathing through your nose, it was only until Toji gently pushed Shiu's wrist to remind him to let go that you were able to breathe properly.

Toji let your shaky legs rest on his thighs as you gulped oxygen into your lungs. "Looks like you're not the only one worked up, pretty girl." Toji cooed, kissing the side of your face as he tipped your chin to look at Shiu, who had his hand over his crotch and was slowly massaging his cock as he stared at the mess between your thighs you made just moments prior.

You swallowed hard at the sight in front of you. The bulge in his pants looked massive as it strained against his hand. "Wanna help him out?" Toji whispered against your ear, keeping his voice only audible to you as he asked his question, wanting to surprise Shiu with your throat if you agreed to it. "Look how horny he is, how hard his cock is." Toji pushed, his hot breath against your ear making your eyes flutter in their sockets.

"If that was me would you let me just ache like that? Huh?" Shiu could hear Toji saying something to you, but he couldn't hear a thing. His own heartbeat in his ears was preventing him from hearing anything under a whisper, which happened to be perfect for Toji's little plan. You licked your lips as you let Toji's words lull you away, your eyes lidded lower as you watched Shiu's cock twitch against his hand. You pressed your thighs together imagining your throat wrapped around his thick cock as Toji worked you up, painting the picture for you.

"Keepin' secrets?" Shiu spoke up, his eyebrows raised and a small smile on his face as he caught your eyes ogling his cock. You felt your face heat up in embarrassment but quickly got over it as Toji's vulgar words brought the focus back on him. You turned your body in his hold and pressed both of your smaller hands against his lips, shutting Toji up. You felt his lips curl from behind your hand as you spoke, "Okay, okay yes." You shook your head before you dropped your hands from his mouth, turning your body back forward. "Nasty ass mouth." You mumbled, making Toji grin.

Toji slid out from behind you and grabbed your hips, forcing you to assume the doggy position as he got behind you and started working on removing his belt. Shiu cocked his head to the side when you placed your hands on his thighs, forcing him to spread his legs and lean back against the door of the car, one of his feet firmly on the bottom of the car. Shiu kept his hands on the seat, unsure if he was allowed to touch you.

"Fucking relax." Toji laughed, pulling his pants and boxers down his thighs in tandem as he watched you caress Shiu's thighs, dangerously close to his cock. "She wants to suck you off, you gonna say no?" Toji said, tapping his cock against the curve of your ass, making you whine and rub your hips back against him.

Shiu looked down at you and noticed how you were keeping your hands away from his cock until he gave you his verbal consent, such a sweetheart. "Wanna hear you say it," Shiu said, his focus landing on you as you looked up at him from under your lashes between his thighs. "Is it true? You wanna suck my cock?" Shiu asked, cradling your face with one of his hands. You leaned into his touch, your eyes shutting as you rubbed your cheek into his rough, warm palm.

"Can I? Can I suck your dick?" You asked, making Toji whistle at your bluntness. Toji rubbed his cock between your thighs, pressing his shaft agaisnt your warm folds, getting his cock all wet with your juices while he waited for you and Shiu to catch up to speed. Shiu swallowed hard and smiled as his freehand came down to undo his belt for you, all the while his approving, gentle eyes stayed on yours.

The air was thick with arousal, making it feel incredibly stuffy and intimate as you patiently waited for Shiu to pull out his cock. Toji not so much, the man kept teasing you with his tip, pressing it against you before pulling away and rubbing it between your folds, all while rushing Shiu to hurry up, whining that he wanted to get his cock wet before he exploded.

When Shiu pulled his hard dick out from the confines of his boxers, you felt your mouth pool with saliva. He was thick, not as long as Toji, but almost. You wondered if you would be able to take him fully or if the stretch would be too much. Shiu must've seen the hesitation written on your face, because he released his hand from the base of his cock and cupped your face with both hands, leaning down a bit so his face was in front of yours.

"You can take it." He assured, nodding at you, making you nod back as his words sent confidence rushing through his veins. Your arms almost gave out on you when Toji pressed his cock into your entrance with no warning, only a low groan from behind you as he slid inside your pussy inch by inch. A shaky breath left Toji's lips as he felt your cunt pulse and clench around him from the unexpected intrusion. "Toji-" You cried, gripping Shiu's thighs tightly for support. Toji's aroused O-shaped mouth formed into a cheeky smile, as he looked up from staring at where the two of you were connected to find Shiu and nodded at him, "You gonna comfort her or what?"

Shiu licked his lips before finding your face with his eyes once more. Your mouth was open and your body was already shaking and trembling from such little stimulation. "Open your mouth doll." Shiu whispered, praising you for listening so quickly by whispering "Good girl." Against your lips as he pressed his mouth against yours, instantly massaging his lips with your own, his tongue crushing yours.

Toji felt himself throb inside your walls at the smacking sound of your lips entangling together. You squeezed like a vice around his cock, letting Toji know you were feeling good. "So fucking hot." Toji groaned before he pulled his hips back, letting his cock slip almost completely out of your pussy before he slammed his length inside of you all at once.

You yelped against Shiu's lips, almost biting him from how hard Toji fucked into you. "Shhh, it's okay, I got you," Shiu reassured, continuing to kiss you as Toji immediately started up a brutal pace behind you. You yelped into Shiu's mouth after every thrust, barely able to keep up with the pace of his lips as Shiu basically licked into your mouth. "Oh my fffucking god." You whined, separating your lips from Shiu's by letting your head dangle forward limply, your eyes rolling back in your head as Toji fucked his fat cock right into your sweet spot.

"My cock feel good baby? Huh?" Toji babbled behind you, his fat balls slapping against your abused clit with every thrust. You nodded dumbly in response, pulsing around his dick. Shiu's cock leaked precum from the tip, a long stream of the white liquid running down his cock as it twitched freely in the air. You caught sight of it when your head was dangling freely, your eyes barely cracking open for a moment when you saw it.

"Hey," Shiu said, gaining your attention once more. His large hand wrapped around your neck as he pulled you back up to face him once more. Shiu looked just as aroused as you, his expression serious, his cheeks red, his cock twitching, he looked desperate. "I'm not done kissin' you." He said, using your neck for leverage to pull you back against him, your lips crashing together.

Shiu greedily swallowed up all your moans as your eyes squeezed tightly together, your eyebrows knit in pleasure. "Yeeahhh, choke her Shiu, she fucking loves that shit." Toji groaned, his eyes flitting between your cunt sucking in his fat cock, and Shiu's fingers that dug into your neck when he squeezed your throat, barely giving you any room to breathe.

You released a long whine against Shiu's lips as he crushed your tongue with his own, his fingers squeezing and releasing your neck, choking you expertly, somehow knowing exactly when you needed to breathe. Amidst all the pleasure, the image of Shiu's neglected cock flashed in your mind, giving you the perfect idea. Blindly, you felt around on Shiu's thigh, creeping your hand closer and closer upwards until you reached his cock.

Shiu groaned against you when your small fingers wrapped around his cock, his eyebrows furrowing together in pleasure. His lips popped off yours and he leaned back a bit to look down at his crotch to watch you jerk him off. The older man bit his lip between his teeth and groaned, nodding and hissing air in through his teeth as you rubbed his pre cum all over his cock--the perfect lube.

"Does that feel good Shiu?" You asked, biting your lip as you looked up at him. Shiu squeezed your throat as he nodded, making you release a wonton moan from between your lips, "So good doll, so fucking good." Toji groaned from behind you, his hand snaking into your hair making your scalp tingle.

Suddenly, the weight of his large body was over yours, one hand on the seat by Shiu's thigh, the other firmly gripping your hair. Shiu released your neck and tucked some of the stray hairs behind your face as he watched Toji hump into you. "Bet he would feel even better if you sucked his cock, huh?" Toji whispered, emphasizing his words by shoving your head down into Shiu's crotch.

Your cheek rested on Shiu's thigh, his cock twitching needily by your face as you continue stroking him off, rubbing his cock like a corkscrew. With Toji's help, you lifted your head off his thigh and found Shiu's cock with your lips. Shiu groaned when he felt your soft mouth wrap around his cock, your hand directing his length into your throat. "No hands," Toji instructed, giving you a particularly hard thrust that had you choking on Shiu's cock already.

The other man groaned, sliding his hand around to settle on the base of your neck as you sloppily sucked his cock with Toji's help. "Oh my god what a fucking mouth." Shiu groaned, covering his mouth with his free hand while his jaw opened in a wide O at how warm and wet your mouth felt around him. Toji matched the pace of his hand shoving you down with his thrusts. Each time Toji fucked into you, he buried Shiu's cock in your throat meanly by shoving your head down onto him.

Shiu relished in the feeling of you choking and gagging around him when you couldn't take it. The visual of your spit bubbling and gathering at the base of his cock made his balls throb. Your mouth ached from the stretch of stuffing his entire cock in your mouth, but the pleasure you were feeling from both the men's sounds and Toji's expert cock made up for the pain in your throat.

You felt a sudden rush of arousal rush over you, the telltale sign of your orgasm getting close tying a knot deep in your belly when Toji angled his hips up a bit to slam directly into your gspot. "Good girl, taking me so well, almost there pretty girl." Shiu praised, pulling your neck down on his cock with each thrust along with Toji shoving your head down. Part of you wondered if Shiu was really this rough in bed too, or if he was taking advantage of it because of Toji's influence.

Toji felt his balls ache as he himself grew closer to his own orgasm, his thrusts getting a little sloppy as he fucked his cock into you. "How's her throat? Gonna make you cum?" Toji asked, finding Shiu's fucked out and blushing face. Shiu nodded, looking into Toji's dark eyes with his own. "It's so fucking good man, her throat is so small." Shiu groaned, biting his lip.

The two men held eye contact for a few seconds longer, their eyes fluttering and expressions growing tense as they got closer to their orgasms. For a brief moment when Toji licked his lips, Shiu dropped his eyes to watch the man do so, his eyes watching his pink tongue wet his mouth. When he looked back up to find Toji's eyes again, the man was smirking, a cocky expression on his face.

"Don't even think about it." Toji laughed. It was only then that Shiu realized how close their faces were, and what he had just done. Shiu shivered and averted his eyes, finding your face full of his cock instead. "Like hell, fuck you." he shot back, making Toji briefly laugh. The three of you quickly settled into a rhythm as you neared the end.

"Gonna fill up this fucking pussy." Toji groaned, releasing the hold he had on your hair to sit up and fuck you properly, grabbing your hips in both hands so he could slam you back into his pelvis, making you feel his cock as deep as possible inside you. "I'm gonna cum too, you're gonna make me cum baby." Shiu groaned, nodding down at you. You were only able to screw your eyes shut and allow him to hold either side of your head as he fucked his hips into your mouth, lewd gagging sounds being fucked from your throat.

Shiu was the first to release his load, his body hunched over your head as he held you in place, forcing you to take his thick cum down your throat even as you choked on it. "Good girl, I know, I- know just take it-" His eyes rolled back in his head as he relished in the feeling of your throat squeezing around his cock each time you swallowed to avoid choking for real. You quickly popped off his cock and rested your head on his thigh next to his softening dick as you choked on air, trying to breathe through your moans as Toji's cock pushed you over the edge.

"O-oh fuck- oh god-" Toji bit down on his teeth as you came around him, your pussy trying to milk his cock of all the cum inside his balls, and that you did. Your orgasm was the last pull Toji needed to cum. His jaw fell open in a silent O as he came, his hips still fucking into yours with each rope of cum he shot deep inside you. Your body jolted along Shiu's thighs as Toji came, the roughness of his thrusts helping you ride out your own high.

Shiu ran his hand over your hair, his fingers scraping across your scalp as you gasped and cried against his thigh, hugging his torso as you fought to come down from such an intense orgasm. Your legs felt like Jello when Toji finally pulled out and leaned over you to give you a kiss. His cum flooding out of your pussy and making a mess on the seats under you made you wince in discomfort, but his soft, tender lips peppering kisses along your face while Shiu ran his hands through your hair distracted you from that feeling.

"Such a good fucking girl baby. I'm so fucking proud of you, that was so hot." Toji cooed, his hands between your bodies massaging your thighs as he spoke. Toji craned his neck to press a kiss directly agaisnt your lips, his sweaty hair tickling Shiu's thigh a bit from the angle, before the man lifted his head to look at Shiu, who watched you two act like lovebirds on his lap.

"You want one too?" He teased, pursing his lips in a kissy face jokingly at Shiu. The older man groaned and shoved his sweaty shoulders away, "Fucking gross." He spat as your boyfriend howled with laughter, reaching in the front of the seat for some towels to clean you up with.

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satoruxx · 4 months

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pairing: toji fushiguro x reader | 1.6k words summary: boyfriend!toji headcanons, fluff, soft!toji, grumpy x sunshine, he’s a simp but he’ll never admit it !! rheya's note: grumpy man being soft for the person he really loves? i’m here for it. mamaguro is literal proof that he can and will love !!

bf!toji who is silent with his care for you. he's not one to be open or dramatic about his feelings, but you bet he'll show them in actions. small, mundane things that could only be picked out under critical eyes—like quietly placing an extra mug of coffee next to you as you work, or being the one to walk closest to the street, fingers firmly clasped around your palm. if you point it out he'll just grunt, shaking his head with a quiet "keep walking" all while pretending to ignore your silly little grin.

bf!toji who isn't really the type to be big on words of affirmation, but huge on physical touch. you tell him you did well on a project at school or work and he just hums, giving you a little nod. he doesn't say anything else—doesn't really have to because the soft lingering pat on your head is enough to tell you that he's proud.

bf!toji who is an aggressive yet affectionate lover. if you're doing something and he's not receiving your attention he will come up behind you and put you in a headlock. he thinks it's an appropriate response considering how much he craves your attention and company—why on earth are you focused on something that isn't him anyway? so be prepared to have his heavy bicep playfully curling around your throat or slinging you over his shoulders at random times—it's his way of telling you he misses you. and if anything, he'll do it to hear you whine and attempt to shove him off.

bf!toji who will absolutely take your phone and change your lockscreen to pictures of him. every so often, you'll turn your phone on and see an entirely different picture—sometimes a picture of him at the gym, other times a picture of him blocking out his face—but it's always him.

bf!toji whose own lockscreen is always something that's related to you. he's sneaky with it, always stealing pictures of you when you're not looking. he's got a separate album with them—probably hidden behind a password because it's something only he should be allowed to see. but whether it's a snapshot of his hand intertwined with yours or a blurry image of you fast asleep in his bed, it's always you. because of course you’re the first thing he should be able to see when he turns his phone on.

bf!toji who, as cliché as it sounds, is exactly the type to go feral if someone's made you upset. and he's freakishly observant, noticing even a slight pinch of your nose or wobble in your lips—he's caught them all. whether you're just down or outright sobbing, he's there, standing in front of you with pure anger weighing heavy on his brows. and yet for all his rage he's nothing but gentle as he firmly takes your face in his calloused hands, muttering a strained "what the fuck happened?" as he forces you to make eye contact with him. his own eyes will dart over your features, searching for discomfort or any other emotion as you explain, barely holding back his own emotions because there's no reason on the fucking planet that you should be upset at all.

bf!toji who rarely says the words "i love you" not because he doesn't but because the words themselves don't hold all that much meaning to him. no he'd rather spend his time proving it to you than just saying it for the sake of saying it. but, sometimes if you pretend to be asleep long enough, you'll catch him quietly whisper the words into your hair, almost like he doesn't want anyone to hear it. don't even bother trying to call him out for it—he'll deny deny deny.

bf!toji whose eyes flutter when he lets you trace over his scars. not just the one cutting over his lips but the ones that litter his back and torso—battle remnants that he doesn't remember much of. he's always hated the look of them, indifferent to old memories of a much more chaotic time in his life. but when your gentle fingers graze over the raised skin he'll sigh, oddly quiet but yet so comfortable.

bf!toji who will drop everything if you need him. don't ever hesitate to ask him for things because you're scared of being a burden—he will yell at you (affectionately). you drank too much with your friends and can't get a ride? call him and he'll pick you up even if it's 4 am. you're feeling nervous about walking home from the convenience store even though it's only ten minutes away from home? stay put and he'll come get you so that you can walk back together. shut up about all that "it's an inconvenience for you" bullshit—he'll do it and that's that.

bf!toji who asks if you've eaten today, and when you answer with a sheepish smile he'll click his tongue, crossing his bulky arms over his chest and giving you a pointed glare. then he'll say "get your ass to the kitchen. c'mon, up." while hoisting you to your feet—most of the time he'll just pick you up and plop you on the counter himself.

bf!toji who wordlessly makes you something to eat, whether it's a quick snack put together with leftovers or an actual full meal. then he'll stand in front of you with the plate and demand you eat. even a slight word of protest and he's scowling, already holding up a spoonful while grumbling a low "don't wanna hear it. open up, kid."

bf!toji who hates when you fall asleep on the couch waiting for him to get home. his job doesn't allow for the comfort of a strict schedule, and he's told you this many times. but you're nothing if not stubborn, and he can only sigh heavily as he sees you dozing against the armrest when he pushes the door open late at night. he'll click his tongue quietly, hooking both arms under your back and knees to cradle you against his chest before walking to the bedroom. though some part of him is pleased, knowing that you seem to care about him enough to make sure he's coming home every night.

bf!toji who glares at anyone who even breathes in your direction the wrong way. some guy eyeing you while you're walking on the street? toji looks like he's ready to rip his head off. some "friend" of yours asking too many questions about why you're dating a man like him? well…if looks could kill.

bf!toji who pulls you into his lap when he kisses you, because he likes the way you fit into his space so perfectly. he won't ever admit how it makes him swoon when you giggle against his lips, instead choosing to tighten his grip on your hips and pull you closer to his chest.

bf!toji who enjoys watching you sit on the kitchen counter and swing your legs back and forth—finding it so unbelievably endearing that he ends up just standing in between your legs and burying his face into your neck. his lips will map chaste kisses across your skin, and he'll hide a wry smile as your quiet giggles wash over him.

bf!toji who will notice when you eye something at a store, whether it's a pretty piece of jewelry or a new sweater or whatever—he keeps note. and then weeks later, once you've forgotten all about it, he'll come home and drop a bag into your lap before shoving his hands into his pockets. when you open it and start gushing about how much you wanted it and how pleased you are, he'll huff and turn away, muttering a low "whatever, kid. 's not a big deal."

bf!toji who sees you upset about something, and loops his bicep around your neck and tucks you under his chin. to an outsider it doesn't look like the most comforting form of a hug, but it's toji, and he's secure and he's safe and he's all the comfort you need—a tight squeeze that grounds you in a way that you can't quite describe.

bf!toji who will never admit how interested he is in your gossip. his ideal way to destress after he comes home is to sit on the couch with you in his lap, your arms looped around his waist as you press yourself against his torso and tuck your head under his chin. and even though his eyes are trained on the tv, he has no clue what's going on—he's more focused on the drama you're spilling or whoever you're ranting about. and he makes it known too, occasionally asking "then what happened, baby?" and adding in a few sounds of disbelief. by the end of your rant, he'll be saying something along the lines of "what a fucking bitch," or "honestly he deserved that," and then asks for updates on the situation over the next few days.

bf!toji who silently watches you trace your fingers over the lines on his palms. you're blabbering about something, tucked against his chest as his other arm remains wrapped around you securely, but he's just focused on your hands. it scares him a little bit—the difference between you and him. his palms are calloused, rough with battle and death, while yours are soft, clean of the horrors he's determined to keep away from you. and a small part of him tells him he shouldn't taint you with all his faults, that you deserve someone more capable of loving than he is. but then he feels you brush your lips over his scarred fingers and he sucks in a breath, tightening his grip imperceptibly. even as he hides a half smile against your brow, he knows he isn't going anywhere.

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tojipie · 6 months

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Omg please please please write another fic about needy cry baby gf and Toji 😫🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

thinking abt him not realizing when he’s being mean because he grew up in a house full of boys where insults were a form of affection :( we’ve all got a little bit of crybaby reader in us me finks

content: hurt/comfort, angst, fluff

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a sea of limbs dance and weave around the court with intricacies you won’t even pretend to understand, leaving you more confused with each passing minute.

you remind yourself that you’re here for toji, wanting to spend more time with him regardless of whether you were into the activity.

toji liked it, so you liked it. at least before the game got confusing.

“that was two points, right?” you ask him, trying to make sense of the shot a player had just made.

toji pauses, holding the chilled end of his beer can to the back of his neck.

“three, baby.” he corrects, kicking his work boots off. the older man relaxes into the soft embrace of the couch with a groan, propping his feet up on the ottoman.

“right… right.” you realize, listening as the announcer gives a rundown of what just happened. you look over and gauge his expression, searching for any acknowledgment of what you’d just said.

“sorry, not really a basketball fan.” you joke, hoping to alleviate the awkward air.

“not that smart either, huh?” toji chuckles, taking a sip of his beer.

your stomach drops at the comment. blood rushes to your ears as humiliation takes over, eyes welling up with hot tears.

you knew he was 100% joking. that’s just how toji was around the people he loved.

you were being too sensitive, right?

the two of you had discussed instances like this before, the older man explaining that that was truly just how he spoke to people.

he never meant to upset you, in fact he’d rather hang than ever hurt you on purpose. his words, not yours.

toji has promised you he was working on it, trying to choose his words more carefully around you.

that’s all it was, you tell yourself. a simple slip of the tongue.

or was he truly mad at you this time?

nope. just a joke. you tell yourself, fiddling with a loose thread in your sleeve to distract from the lump in your throat. you try to inhale around the blockage, accidentally releasing a sob that alerts toji right away.

“hey.” he mumbles, setting his drink down to look at you. calloused hands cradle your face as the older man takes a close look at you.

you pull away, trying to compose yourself. just a joke! you remind yourself.

a joke, not serious. just. a. joke.

“nonono, hey it’s okay.” he whispers, eyes blowing wide as he realizes the gravity of the situation.

“i’m sorry sweetheart, i’m sorry.” he pleads, muting the tv to focus on you.

“m’ not stupid.” you whimper, wiping each eye with the back of your hand.

“course not pretty girl.” he whispers, rubbing your back in soft circles. “i’m sorry, you know that’s j—“

“just how you talk.” you mumble, not sure if his explanation actually made it ok.

“but.” he starts, pulling you into his lap with a grunt.

“that’s not an excuse, right?” he asks you, clearly remorseful.

“need to watch my mouth around my girl, huh?” he chuckles, still rubbing small circles up and down your back.

“it’s ok.” you conclude, resting your head on his shoulder as he presses soft kisses to your cheeks and forehead.

“hate making you upset.” he tells you firmly, nuzzling into the crown of your head.

“you wanna watch something else?” he asks, placing the remote in your hand. “movie, youtube?”

you crawl out of the older man’s lap and onto the couch, pulling up prime to scan the comedy section.

“i fucking hate basketball.” you giggle, the man beside you breaking out in full blown laughter as you press play on the remote.

#adah’s asks #toji x reader #jujutsu kaisen #toji fluff #toji drabbles #toji hcs #toji x reader fluff #toji x reader angst #toji x reader hurt/comfort #hurt/comfort #toji x fem reader #toji x fem reader flufd #jjk #zenin toji #toji zenin #zenin toji x reader

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vagabond-umlaut · 6 months

Text

pumpkin spiced metal

You like your men like you like your coffee. Dark. Robust. Steamy. Not the best for your health. The very worst for your heart, for sure.

▸ wrestler!Toji x baker!Reader; Historical AU; Pre-Relationship; Tons of Fluff; Teasing Banter; It's Toji so obviously there'll be mentions of attacks, fights, injuries [Reader is 100% unharmed, dw!! :))]; Reader's fearless nature is something I can do anything to have; Toji & Reader Are Into Each Other And Both of Them Low-Key Know This [they are not idiots but smart, for once, your honor]; Reader Has She/Her Pronouns; There is one tiny [or four tiny] mention(s) of Gojo here HEHE

▸ This belongs to the same Historical JJK AU as the knight Nanami x lady-in-waiting Reader fic parterre but you don't need to read that to read this!! This is a stand-alone!! 😊😊

▸ based on the ask sent by @ancient-vivarium for my milestone event. TYYY SMMM FRELLIE!! 🥰🥰🤗😘 i don't own the characters, image or divider used. please don't plagiarize or translate or repost this. enjoy reading! ❤️

"Coffee wakes one up better than fights, y'know?"

A dagger grazing the shell of your ear before flying into the wall is the very last thing you could have expected your off-handed comment to ever receive; yet, now, on seeing the receiver of your query, you deem you're lucky enough your beloved ear wasn't cut off your beloved face by that wretched dagger.

Fingers gripping your mug more firmly, you heave a heavy sigh— only to click your tongue in the very next instant. Flipping the sign on your bakery's door back to 'closed', you sit down on the steps and make an awkward gesture for this sudden visitor to take the seat beside yours.

A moment passes. And just when you think this person will simply be standing with half of his hulky persona in light and the remaining in a darkness, he shuffles forwards to plop down onto the seat proffered.

You shove the glee curving your lips behind the ceramic of your mug.

Toji throws you a horribly incensed glare from where he's slouched on the stair. "Ya find this shit funny, eh? I can still kill ya if I wanna. These injuries don't mean anything— 'm tellin' ya."

"Mmhm," you nod your agreement quickly, biting your cheek once to keep them blasted giggles within yourself. "I know you can– wrestler and rumored assassin Toji. I'm very well aware you can; but don't you think it's a bit funny— someone as strong and scary as you sharing a cup of coffee with someone akin me? If you aren't you, won't you find this slightly funny, hm? I bet you will, you know."

Your confident remark earns a furrowed glance from your companion before he sighs, dragging a palm down his so weary face then curling it into a fist to rest his cheek on. You shoot him a quizzical look— only for it to bounce right off him, as he closes his eyes, and gives another exhausted sigh.

The sight twists your heart in a way, pretty weird but not unpleasant, you decide.

A hazy yet sharp eye blinking open to watch you, Toji grumbles, "Was attacked by several men some time back on my way to the grounds... of course, I beat them up to a pulp so much, not even their family can tell them apart now; but everything happened so out of the blue—"

"You don't need to explain anything anymore. I understand where the sudden knife attack came from," you cut him off gently, keeping your cup on the ground beside and moving to rub a soothing thumb on an awfully deep scar on the underside of his palm. The muscles beneath your ministrations tense a little, before relaxing a smidgen— you hear a quiet huff of a laugh from the man next to you.

You drag your eyes away from the scars on his hands to that on his lip before lifting them to meet his deep, dark gaze. A smirking glint stays there to greet your inquiring gaze.

Toji asks, "Aren't ya scared of being alone with someone rumoured to have killed half of the Zenin clan, eh, girl? People say the man in front of you once attempted to finish off that blue-eyed brat too once... Did ya not know that?"

You do. The thing is, you do.

You do know each and every one of those rumors. Silly or not. Weird or not. Being the most popular baker in the royal kingdom has made you the unwilling listener to these rumours and so many, many more.

[Just the other day, you heard one lady screech to the other, how she spotted the princess winking— yes, winking— at Lord Gojo. The next day, you saw Her Highness in your bakery, kicking the same Lord and calling him names– no sane lady would ever dream of calling the man they fancy.]

[The princess is not very sane, you know this too. But you choose not to dwell on it too much.] [You value your neck very much, thank you!!]

You shrug after two seconds worth consideration.

"Those Zenin's deserve to be killed, if I'm being very honest here. And as for the matter pertaining to Lord Gojo..." you trail off, before giving your second shrug of the minute and resuming, "I noticed you and he conversing in the marketplace the other day, so I suppose– whatever happened, if anything at all, is all in the past. Also, it's for the best if I don't interfere in others' business, y'know? I've a not-very-tiny one of my own to manage, which is no easy feat, if I must admit— but, yeah. No matter what your reputation is, I don't really mind you here. You've the signs of being a nice company."

An oddly piercing gaze is the only respone your lengthy reply receives— or so you think before Toji cracks a barely-there smile at you, rising from his seat and extending a hand towards you.

It's not the etiquette, some part of your mind tsks. You shut it down in less than an instant. Etiquettes are shit stuff meant for those of noble blood. You and Toji aren't so— at least, not this very second in the soft light of the day, breaking through the cloak of the yesternight— those etiquettes can be easily forgotten by you two. For now.

Forever as well. Perhaps.

You too rise, placing your palm in his outstretched one. And shoot a wide smile when he squeezes your hand and queries, "Ya sure won't mind making an extra cup of coffee for every morning from now on, yeah?"

Enjoying the pitter-patter in the middle of your chest, you shake your head, chuckling. "Heavens, no. If anything, I'll be the happiest to drag another person into my coffee-worshipping cult."

Especially if that someone is as alluring as the one before you— with a crooked grin, a tad bloody and very much feral– but you decide not to mention it– choosing to keep it close to your heart till the time Toji too grows nearer to your heart.

[Which, you reckon, will happen soon, if the pinkish hue of his ears and the moisture on his palm are what you hope suppose they are.]

▸ masterlist

#toji x you #toji x reader #zenin toji x you #zenin toji x reader #jjk x you #jjk x reader #toji fluff #jjk fluff #kit posts 📝

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afortoru · 11 months

Text

𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑩𝒓𝒊𝒅𝒈𝒆𝒔 𝑩𝒆𝒕𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒏 (𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒔 𝒎𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕)

𝖲𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒: 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝖺𝗅𝗐𝖺𝗒𝗌 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖿𝖺𝗆𝗂𝗅𝗒, 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝗒 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝖺𝖼𝗋𝗂𝖿𝗂𝖼𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗅𝗂𝖿𝖾 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝗐𝗈𝗎𝗅𝖽 𝗁𝖺𝗉𝗉𝖾𝗇 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝖺𝖼𝗍𝗎𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝖺𝗌𝗄𝖾𝖽 𝗍𝗈 𝖽𝗈 𝗂𝗍. 𝖸𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝖾𝗑𝖺𝖼𝗍𝗅𝗒 𝗀𝗈𝗇𝗇𝖺 𝖽𝗂𝖾 𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝖺𝗇 𝖺𝗋𝗋𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖾𝖽 𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗋𝗂𝖺𝗀𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗋𝗂𝗏𝖺𝗅 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝗉𝖺𝗇𝗒'𝗌 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗇𝗀 𝖼𝖾𝗈, 𝖳𝗈𝗃𝗂 𝖹𝖾𝗇𝗂𝗇 𝗌𝗈𝗎𝗇𝖽𝗌 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗌𝖾 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗄𝗇𝗈𝗐 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗁𝗂𝗆 𝗂𝗌 𝗇𝗈𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀.

Pairing: Ceo!Toji Zenin x Reader

Genre: fluff, angst , hurt/comfort, modern, ceo au

Warnings: family drama, slight childhood trauma, slight smut but not very graphic, pregnancy

Status: ongoing

𝑦/𝑛'𝑠 𝑚𝑜𝑜𝑑𝑏𝑜𝑎𝑟𝑑, 𝑠𝑢𝑘𝑢𝑛𝑎'𝑠 𝑚𝑜𝑜𝑑𝑏𝑜𝑎𝑟𝑑, 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑔𝑖𝑓𝑡 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑆𝑢𝑘𝑢𝑛𝑎

Part 1 +

#toji fic #the bridges between #toji x reader #toji zenin x wife!reader #toji zenin x reader #toji fluff #toji angst #ceo toji #jujutsu kaisen #jjk fic #toji x you #zenin toji x reader #zenin toji x you #jjk x you #jjk x reader #jjk fluff #jjk angst #mamagumi

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teddybeartoji · 5 months

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toji coming home from work and finding you in your shared bed, reading a book. the corners of his lips tilt slightly upward before he falls down onto the soft mattress and his pretty little girlfriend. his arms snake around your waist as he lays his head on your tummy, hands crawling under your shirt, longing to feel your warm skin against his. he stays there for a second, then raises his head to look up at you. "hi." to some, it's just a low grumble, but to you, it's everything. "hi." you whisper back while reaching out to him. you caress his jaw, making his heavy eyes fall shut and his head rest back onto your stomach. your fingers massage his head and gently comb through his hair. you wish you could take away his exhaustion but this will have to suffice. with a quiet voice you mumble a soft "i love you" and he answers back with burrowing his face deeper into your soft skin and a squeeze around your middle. this is enough.

#mickey is daydreaming #i just wanna hug him:((#mean old man needs some loving #and i will be there to do said loving #toji #toji fushiguro #toji fushiguro x reader #toji fushiguro fluff #jjk #jjk fluff #jjk x reader #toji zenin #toji x reader #toji zenin x reader #fushiguro toji #fushiguro toji x reader #fushiguro toji fluff #zenin toji #zenin toji x reader

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noosayog · 3 months

Text

THE NATURE OF LONGING

fushiguro (zenin) toji x fem!reader

contents: NSFW, non-curse au, arranged marriage, both toji and reader have terrible parents, mutual pining, sexual tension, afab! reader, dry humping, grinding, fingering, nipple play, clitoral play, oral (f receiving), overstim, pet names, fluff, angst. MDNI

wc: 5.9k

part 2 | series masterlist here

The two of you settle into a semi-regular routine of watching TV together on the couch after Toji cooks dinner. Toji will tease you for your choices in shows and movies or joke about watching an R-rated movie. He learns his lesson after you fix him with a glare, simply shutting up and watching your pick.

Tonight, a movie plays as you and Toji sit on opposite sides of the couch, each of your thighs pressed against either armrests.

A couple minutes in, Toji notices you shivering underneath your throw blankets. He laughs quietly.

“What?” you say defensively. “It’s cold.”

“Are you just looking for an excuse to cuddle, princess?”

“You wish, perv. You’re just looking for an excuse to cop a feel.”

After the night you kissed, Toji noticed a shift in your demeanor. You still argue, but your words are delivered with less heat. It’s less venomous bite and more teasing banter. At least he’s started to interpret it that way. Whenever you entertain his teasing, he swears you feel the sexual tension too. Multiple times, he’s come close to calling you out for using snark as your foreplay.

Alas, he restrains from being too vulgar. He hasn’t yet tamed the possibility of violence out of you yet.

“Promise I won’t do anything unsavory,” he says, holding his arms out to you, his chest beckoning.

You fix him with a look.

“Nothing too unsavory,” he corrects himself.

“As if you can help yourself,” you huff.

He chuckles, unruffled. “C’mon, don’t be difficult about this.”

In one motion, he pulls you to sit between his legs. The touching has become too normal. Toji secretly relishes in knowing you find some kind of comfort in his touch. Though you protest, your body language always gives you away when you sag against him. He can read you like a book.

He takes the blanket from you and winds it, along with his biceps, around your waist, hunching over your entire frame. Toji grins as you lean into his chest.

You pinch his arm. “Shut up.”

He holds tighter. “Yes, ma’am.”

As the movie plays, Toji feels your head lolling side to side in a sleepy haze, only finding slight comfort when it awkwardly finds a spot on Toji’s sternum. He maneuvers to lay down: him on his back and you splayed out on your stomach on top.

When you rouse slightly, Toji freezes. You don’t wake, however. You snuggle closer into his chest and move your legs to straddle one of his thighs.

Smirking ever so slightly at your touch starved actions, he makes a mental note to remember to tease you for it in the morning. He shifts a bit to accomodate for your movements, hands coming up to caress your waist.

His thumb brushes against the sliver of skin where your shirt rides up and you shiver on his chest. Your back arches instinctively to get closer to your source of warmth, only ending up with you pressing your hips into his. A pathetic mewl escapes your lips, so quiet he almost misses it.

Toji comes to a full stop.

His hands squeeze at the fat of your hips experimentally and this time he hears it loud and clear.

A pitiful little moan of his name.

“Fuck,” he mutters to himself.

Your hips start moving, as if a knee-jerk reaction to Toji’s boner beginning to press into your tummy.

Toji calls your name. And again with more urgency, but you simply mumble his name again.

It’s torture, waiting for you to wake but you do, slowly blinking the sleep out of your eyes and Toji can’t help but think even your eyelashes fluttering is sexy.

“Toji? Oh!” you exclaim when you realize your positioning. You scramble to get off of Toji, but one of your knees slips off the couch, forcing you to brace your hands on the couch beneath Toji’s armpits, his hands coming up to your waist to steady you. His big hands cover almost half your torso and you’re hyper aware that his thumbs are digging into the underside of your tits.

That’s when you notice the heat in your leggings. Your stumble caused your clothed crotch to settle on top of Toji’s thigh. The press of his thick thigh against your sensitive center makes you squeeze your legs together subconsciously, realizing too late that his thigh between your legs is the only thing that offers you some friction.

Toji watches, completely enthralled, as your eyes widen. He can almost see the thoughts racing through your brain. And having you here, laying on top of him, so apparently mortified, makes something swell up in his chest. He crooks his knee upwards to press harder against you.

You fall back onto his chest, whimpering a sweet moan against his ear.

That’s all it takes for Tojji to use his grip on your waist to push you harder against his leg. He bounces his thigh lightly, nudging harder at your heated cunt.

You wind your arms around his neck, leaning all your weight on his torso and hiding your face in his neck. Your hips are rolling against his thigh to work for your own release. Toji lets go of your hips to slide his hands into your leggings. He squeezes the globes of your ass, kneading them and spreading them rhythmically with your thrusts to grant your pussy maximum access to him.

“Mm! Toji wait-”

“Wait? You’re the one moving on your own, sweetheart.”

“No, I’m not!”

“Mhm,” he responds disbelievingly, patronizingly. “Such a good girl.”

He feels your arms tighten around his neck.

“You like that? You like being called a good girl?”

“Toji, I’m gonna-”

“Gonna cum? From just a little grinding?”

“Toji! I can’t, I can’t. It’s not enough, please-”

Toji pushes a hand lower into your leggings to brush a finger against your slit, grazing against it. “C’mon, sweetheart, cum for me.”

His one finger ghosting your bare pussy sends jolts up your body, hips twitching every time his finger slides ever so slightly against your lower lips. You finally come apart, spilling into your panties. You pant against Toji’s neck while he continues to kneed at your ass.

Your shaky mouthing against his pulse point almost sends him into a frenzy, distracting himself by squeezing harder and pressing hot kisses against your temple. He breathes a laugh against the crown of your head and the condensation from his breath sends another round of shivers down your body that Toji feels with precision.

“That was hot, princess.”

When you finally push up to meet his eyes, he grins. Toji slips his hands out from your leggings. He brings his fingers, glistening from your essence, to his mouth, sucking them clean all while maintaining eye contact with you.

“Toji!” you squeal, embarrassed beyond belief. He only finishes cleaning off his fingers before leaning up, intending to kiss you.

However, you avert your face, pushing up to get up.

“Wait, princess-”

You dart away to the safety of your room, squeaking out a sorry and slamming the door. Never mind his raging boner, he flops back onto the couch with a heavy arm thrown over his face.

“Fuck,” he breathes, trying to figure out how he’s going to talk himself out of this one.

Your presence is noticeably absent until the following evening. He cooks dinner as usual, trying not to think about you when he hears the front door open. Toji busies himself chopping the onions so as not to give away that he has been anxiously awaiting your return. When you enter the kitchen, you say nothing. You hop to sit onto the counter close enough to where he is working, hands tightly clasped together, so obviously wanting to broach the topic at hand.

“Hey, welcome home.”

“I’m home,” you say, not meeting his gaze.

“Dinner’s almost ready,” he says, going back to his onions. “You want any?”

You look up, surprised. It’s a conversation the two of you have had many times: he’s offering you an out.

“Oh, um, yeah,” you stutter. “Please,” you tack on.

“Coming right up, sweetheart.”

The corner of his eye picks up your shoulders sagging and your hands coming apart to rest on either side of your thighs.

“So how was your day?” you ask, relieved to not have to talk about last night after all.

This makes Toji startle, knife hovering over the onion, eyes comically widening. “You care?” He asks incredulously. Dropping the knife, Toji saunters over to you, hips caging you in, and holds the back of his palm against your forehead. “You got a fever that burned through your brain or something?”

You smack his hand away, “shut up! Just wanted to be civil for once, but I guess I shouldn’t have bothered-”

His chuckle interrupts your rant. “My day was good, sweetheart. And you? You thought about how I made you cum in your pants last night?”

“Toji!”

His devilish grin morphs into one of amusement when your legs start to swing adorably from where they dangle off the counter. Toji allows his palms to rest on your hands on either side of your thighs, leaning forward to mouth at your collarbone.

He expects you to smack him away, but you crane your neck to give him access.

“Mmm, Toji,” you moan.

He licks and kisses up to your earlobe. “You hungry?”

You hum, thoughts of dinner a million miles away. Toji revels in the effect he has on you.

“Me too,” Toji says, abruptly pulling away. “Dinner will be ready in a minute.”

The smirk that threatens to show itself is so hard to stamp down when he sees your dazed expression, beginnings of a pout blooming on your lips at Toji’s sudden withdrawal.

Ever the sore loser, you shake his lingering scent from your head, resisting the urge to rub your thighs together for some relief.

“I’m gonna go shower before dinner,” you say, hopping off the counter.

“Can I join?”

You flash him your middle finger on your way out, smiling when you hear his belly laugh.

After dinner, you do the dishes as Toji settles on the couch to pick something to fall asleep to. He has sports highlights on when you join him, rolling your eyes and grabbing the remote to switch it over. He just lays still, saying nothing. You pick a sitcom to put on for background noise before moving to sit on your designated side. Toji grabs your hand to stop you, eyes still on the screen. He reclines from his upright position to lay on his back, waiting for you with open arms. Without protest, you slump in a heap onto his body, giggling at the “oof” pushed from his throat. His arms come up naturally to stroke your back.

“You got a thing for this, huh?”

You feel the heat return to your cheeks when you remember what had happened last time the two of you were in this position. When Toji laughs, you realize you love feeling the rumbles rippling through this chest and hearing the sound so close to your ears.

As the show plays, you shuffle around to get comfortable, surprising yourself by how unbothered you are when you start to feel his cock getting harder under you and when his hands slip down to start kneading your ass.

The heat of his growing erection presses against your pussy, almost as if it was his warm hands cupping you down there. Imagining it makes your cunt clench.

Toji doesn’t take it any further though, content just touching. That’s when you rest your elbows on Toji’s chest, propping your head up on your palms to look at him.

“Toji?” you ask.

“Hmm?”

“What are you and your parents like?”

He tears his eyes from the TV to glance down at you. “Why do you ask?”

“You’ve seen me with mine. Just wanna know about you too.”

Toji’s eyes go back to the screen as he thinks about his answer. Not because this is a sensitive topic, but only because he truly is indifferent. The years of their neglect and callousness have stripped away any remaining affection or hope he may hold for them.

“They’re like yours. Shitty parents, just waiting to sell me off.”

You listen empathetically.

“But I came to terms with it a long time ago. Just like this… situation we’re in. I’ve known for a long time they’d marry me off when the time came.”

“How can you stand it? They’re supposed to love us, aren’t they?”

Your eyes start to water and it makes Toji’s heart ache. He gives your ass a big squeeze. “I know. And I used to feel the way you do… but I’ve just lived a bit longer than you – realized earlier there was no point in wasting time, wishing they’d come to their senses.” He sighs. “I’ve had a long time to stop wishing for a dead plant to come back to life.”

“That’s so sad,” you sniffle.

“Hey,” he wipes a tear away. “You’re not alone in this, okay? You got me now. I ain’t going anywhere. We’re married.”

You stiffen just a bit at that, relaxing only when his fingers start to rub soothing circles on your cheek. “It’s not like you chose me, though. You could’ve married anyone else if mine wasn’t the first file your parents saw.”

“True,” he agrees. “But no point in thinking about the could’ve’s, should’ve’s, would’ve’s now. And anyway, I think you’re forgetting something.”

You listen raptly.

“Even before I knew I’d be marrying you, I always thought you were hot, especially when you’d scream at me in your cute little pajama shorts.”

You give him a little smack. He can hear you scolding him to be serious. “Liar. You hated me,” you say.

He tuts. “Uh uh, sweetheart. I think that was just you. I've wanted to get in your pants since day one.”

“Really?” you rise to gaze at him with starry eyes. “You weren’t unhappy to marry me?”

Toji swears he has hearts in his eyes when he sees how you hang onto his every word.

“What’s with all the self-doubt tonight, princess? I know you felt how hard I got from just kissing and touching you.”

“Toji!” you scold, embarrassed. “I’m being serious!”

“So am I. I wouldn’t touch up on anyone just because we got hitched.”

“So you did it because it was me?”

“You know the answer to that. Now, any other questions?”

You shake your head, plopping it back down to press your cheek against his pecs, listening to his heart beat.

When you pinch the closest part of him every time his hands slow, sighing in pleasure when they resume their possessive touch on your bare skin, it’s all over for Toji. In the sweetest way possible.

It’s a lazy sunday afternoon for Toji when he finally emerges from his room, yawning the sleep from his eyes and scratching lazily at his stomach. He finds you sitting on the floor of the living room, back resting against the foot of the couch. Your legs are folded criss-cross, making your shorts ride up and exposing even more of your thighs. Before you notice him, he slips quietly behind you, shushing your noises of protest when he inserts himself between you and the couch. He pushes his back against the couch while spreading his legs on either side of you, hunching over to engulf you with his entire body. You sigh at his warmth, content to go back to your book.

Toji dozes off on your shoulders for a bit, but the scent of your shampoo and strawberry body wash invades his drowsy mind. He feels his dick twitch in his sweats and surely you do as well, because you begin squirming, accidentally pushing closer to his growing hard on.

“Toji, your-”

“Yeah,” he hums, beginning to kiss and suck marks on your neck. You shut your eyes and enjoy the warmth his palms are spreading.

The hands circling your waist start to explore, one coming up to tickle under your breasts and the other sliding slowly down. He lightly squeezes the flesh around your tummy, making you squirm. You still instantly, mouth opening in a circle and head lolling back onto his shoulder when his hand suddenly circles your right tit and squeezes roughly.

“Toji-”

“No bra? Were you waiting for me to touch you?” he murmurs, voice still scratchy from sleep. He doesn’t allow you to deny it when he roughly squeezes your tit again before shoving his hand under your shirt to touch them bare. He continues his ministrations on your breasts for a bit, purposely avoiding your nipples until you start whining.

“This is in the way,” he says before roughly tugging your tight little tank top up to expose your tits. The other hand joins in to give the other mound of flesh a good knead as he starts to ghost a finger around your nipple. The circles he draws around your nipples get tighter and tighter until his fingers finally touch you where you want him. He gives each nipple a flick before tugging gently at them.

“Ohhh, Toji,” you breathe.

“Such beautiful tits.”

After he’s had his fill of touching your boobs, his hands travel down to wear you need relief most. He toys with the hem of your booty shorts occasionally letting his fingers hook into your panties without ever fully touching.

“Toji, ah, please…”

“Sound so fucking sweet, begging for me.”

Each moan that is pulled from your lips is rewarded with a brush of his fingers against your slit.

“Fuck, baby. You are dripping. Got wet from just me touching your tits?”

“Toji, please! Just touch me,” you beg.

“Whatever my baby wants,” he whispers into your ear.

One big hand cups your entire pussy, big fingers teasing up and down over your clothed cunt.

“S’not enough. Want your fingers inside!”

Toji almost moans. He manhandles your legs from their initial position pretzeled over each other to each leg propped over his knees. The new position forces your cunt open and the shifting of your panties over your sensitive hole tears a whimper from your throat. Shoving your drenched panties and shorts to the side, he finally gives you what you want and pushes his middle finger into your cunt. The other hand comes back up to give your hard nipples some attention.

“This what you want, princess?”

“Mmmm, more!”

He adds another finger to your sopping hole, starting to pick up the pace and grind his palm into your clit with each thrust. “Such a good little slut, taking my fingers, getting so wet for me.”

Your insides clench and Toji curses.

“You like being called a slut? Or you like being praised?”

Your back arches further with each thrust. “Both! I like both, Toji!”

“Yeah?” he drawls, adding a third finger and starting to jackhammer into your cunt.

“Ah, oh! Toji, please, don’t stop! Gonna cum, gonna cum-”

“Bet you are, can feel your little cunt clenching. C’mon then, cum all over my fingers.”

“Oh, fuck,” you scream, creaming all over Toji’s fingers. He thrusts several more times, then removes his fingers to rub tight, frantic circles over your clit to prolong your orgasm.

“Toji! Please, stop, ‘m so sensitive. I can’t!”

“Yeah you can, baby. Cum with your clit, I’ll make you feel so good.”

Your hands come up to squeeze your own tits, teasing your own nipples as you chase your second high. The sight almost makes Toji bust in his pants.

“T- Toji! I’m cumming!”

You reach your second peak, wildly jerking your hips against Toji’s fingers and jaw going slack.

Coming down from your high, you rest your head against Toji’s neck, letting his hand explore your body. Your pants warm his pulse point and Toji’s chest swells with pride.

“You were such a good girl, cumming twice on my fingers. Bet you’d let me eat that sweet pussy out, huh?”

“Mmm,” you moan, angling your face up for a kiss. Toji indulges you, pressing innocent pecks all over your face then to your lips. You whine when he keeps his lips shut, licking his scar, a habit Toji notices you’ve picked up. Toji loves the attention, prolonging the moment. He opens his lips for a second but closes them when he feels your tongue greedily pushing through.

“Toji, please, wanna kiss you…”

Toji groans, eyes rolling to the back of his head. Your submission has his cock throbbing through his sweats. He manhandles you onto the couch, lifting your body by the waist and throwing your legs over his shoulders. Your shorts hit the ground and he presses his nose against your clothed pussy, inhaling deeply.

“You smell so fuckin good.”

“Toji!” you cry out, pushing at his head to try to keep him away. “S’embarrassing.”

“Nu uh, sweetheart.” He makes his displeasure for your resistance known by grabbing a fistful of your damp panties, pulling them up so that the fabric disappears into your slit, rubbing against where you need him most.

You arch against the feeling, letting out high pitched squeals. “Ah- Oh- To-”

Toji gives the material a few more cruel tugs before using a finger to dig it out. You let a pornographic moan fly when Toji starts lapping at your leaking cunt through the fabric. His tongue pushes in and out, not forgetting to come up to circle your hard clit.

“Need more, Toji!”

“Mhmm,” he hums against your pussy. “Tell me what you need, baby.”

“Need to feel it!”

“Hmm?” he purrs, letting the vibrations of his voice do it’s thing on you.

“Wanna feel your tongue on my - oh!”

Giving in, he pulls your panties down in one sweeping motion and starts fucking you with his tongue.

“Ahhh! Toji, more! Yes, oh, right there!”

“Ride my tongue, baby. Want to feel you cum on my tongue.”

You obey, rolling your hips desperately against Toji’s lolled out tongue. “S’not enough! I can’t- please, please, Toji!”

His hand comes up to start rubbing feverish circles over your clit to help you. Your back arches off the couch and your gyrating becomes erratic. With one light slap to your clit, your eyes fly open and you scream with your release. Toji continues to lap into the folds of your leaking cunt, drinking up your lewd fluids.

“Ohh, you taste so fucking good, princess.”

“Toji, stop- please- oh my fucking, I’m gonna cum again!”

When you try to squirm away, his arms roughly snake under your hips to push your center into his face. He’s relentless, sucking and licking you through your orgasm. Another slap to your cunt sends you into another spiraling orgasm.

Toji’s licks become gentle, helping you through your fourth climax as one warm hand rubs tenderly at the fat of your drooling lips.

When he finally parts with your pussy, you look down to see his mouth, cheeks, and chin glistening with your cum. He releases your ass and you sit up on your elbows to meet him for a kiss. He gives you a delicate kiss, staining your tongue with the taste of his saliva and your own release. You moan at the taste, breath stuttering when you feel his boner pressing against your sensitive lower lips.

Your hands come down shakily to palm him through his pants.

“Fuck, sweetheart, that feels good.”

You rub harder, trailing your hands down the underside of his cock. Toji hisses when you brush his balls. You’re enthralled by the pleasure all over his face as you slide up and down his erection through his pants. Your fingers circle the tip playfully, pushing at where you know his opening would be leaking pre-cum.

“Stop,” he hisses.

You don’t listen, continuing to tease the tip, giggling as you listen to his low groans.

“Enough,” he utters, grabbing your hands and holding them above your head. “Wanna make me feel good, sweetheart?”

You nod, looking up at him through wet lashes.

“Bet you do. But all you’re getting is this today.”

Toji then presses his clothed erection against your throbbing cunt. He starts grinding his hips against yours, the outline of his cock sliding between the fat of your pussy. The remains of your previous orgasm wet his sweats in no time and the friction feel so good.

“Bet you can come like this, huh? Don’t even need my dick inside to come? Show me then, baby. Show me how you come from just some humping.”

He starts thrusting harder, your pussy clenching around nothing. Toji’s free hand flicks at your nipple while his lips sucks the other nub into his mouth. His tongue swirls over the hard tip as he continues to move his hips. With a bite of your nipple, you scream one last time, feeling the slick flow out of your bottom lips. You hear the low drag of his voice when he groans out, “fuuuck.”

Toji releases your arms, allowing you to watch breathlessly as he parts from you. A string of your slick connects your cunt and Toji’s pants as he pulls away. You see the dark spot in Toji’s pants spread.

“You.. came?” you ask dumbly.

Toji’s grin is feral as he watches you stare at the receding tent in his pants. He flips you over so you’re resting your entire weight on him, tired pussy resting perfectly over the wet spot. “Fuck yeah baby, that was so hot. Could cum listening to you moan all day.”

You collapse onto his chest, giving it a weak smack. “Perv.”

He presses a light kiss on the crown of your head. “You love it.”

Toji isn’t surprised when his phone rings with the Zenin on the other side of the line. In fact, he’s been thinking it was way past time for them to check in, make sure he’s doing his part in keeping the union between the families strong.

He almost smirks as he picks up the phone, smugly thinking of how he had you boneless on the couch only earlier that afternoon. Imagine his surprise when the Zenin address him with a sense of urgency, notifying him of rumors of your family’s recent talks to unite with the Gojos. To his knowledge, you were an only child and he certainly hasn’t heard of any close cousins in your clan. He asks for clarity, not letting his panic take over, but they have no further information: only that they have heard talk of your family meeting secretly with the elders of the Gojo family. Toji hangs up with unease.

His suspicions are confirmed when your parents drop by without warning the following day. You’re out, which he relays to them, but they stay in the doorway.

“We’re here to speak with you.”

Toji lets them in, making them tea as a dutiful son-in-law would. Your mother accepts the tea, but immediately places it on the table without taking a sip. Your father forgoes formalities altogether.

“Let us be honest, Zenin,” your father starts. “We have been offered an engagement with the son of the Gojo family.”

“Well,” your mother says pleasantly. “The Gojo family is a very prestigious family. It would be silly of us to pass up on the offer.” Her head tilts ever so slightly, flashing a small smile. “You understand, don’t you?”

Toji’s head swims. “And the union with the Zenin house…”

Your mother places one manicured hand on his knee. “I’m sure you can find someone much more suitable for you than our daughter.”

“Our clan has a distant cousin, close to our daughter in age, you can marry. We will discuss this with the Zenin to ensure no lost love between our two families,” you father finishes.

“And you may not know this but…” your mother continues. “...our daughter used to be entangled with the Gojo son, but the engagement fell through when they parted. This is the perfect opportunity for the two to reunite their flame. It would be a shame to keep young ones in love apart, especially for reasons so grotesque as family ties, wouldn’t you agree?”

“... your daughter and Gojo Satoru have history?” Toji asks dumbly.

“Why, yes!” your mother exclaims. “They were the most picturesque couple. Their parting was such a shame, but it simply must be destiny offering them another chance,” she rambles.

“Enough,” your father cuts in. He places a stack of papers on the table, motioning for Toji to look. Divorce papers.

“This is all we wanted to discuss today. Please consider the offer and we will be back another day to collect.” Your father says. “We truly do see this as a most favorable option for all parties.” He speaks as if it’s a done deal, as final as it had been the day the two of you signed the marriage forms in the first place.

There’s nothing Toji can say back as they leave him with pleased, closed-lipped smiles and assurances of a strong bond between the two families going forward. Having said all they need to say, your parents depart, leaving Toji with the blank divorce form.

The hours tick by as he sits on the couch, staring blankly at the two untouched cups of tea that have long gone cold. Of all the information he received, he’s not sure where to start processing – your history with Gojo, that you’ve been secretly meeting with him, if you’ve known about your parents’ schemes, the divorce.

The thoughts continue to plague him that night, ringing loudly in his head. Amplified with the silence in the house and the absence of your presence.

He awakens the next morning to the incessant ringing of his phone. His groggy voice answers the call – from his parents – and is greeted with a hysterical tirade from his mother. She screams something of the pride of the Zenin family, how dare they so blatantly show their preference for the Gojos, Toji zones out the rest. His ears perk up when they start talking about you.

“... happening today!”

“What,” Toji sits up. “Today? The divorce forms haven’t even been signed yet.” He rushes out to scan the house for any signs of you; he would rather hear the answer from you than his rotten family.

“Today!” his mother shouts over the line.

You are still nowhere to be found and dread creeps into his stomach at the idea that you had spent the night out. Where? This was supposed to be your home.

He hastily gets the location of your omiai with Gojo Satoru, his mother leaving him with a warning that he better fix this.

Upon his arrival at the restaurant, he storms through the private rooms, leaving no screendoor unturned. They all yield empty tables and groups he does not recognize, to his relief. At the last door, he takes a deep breath before sliding the screendoor open, praying that he won’t find you behind the door.

His stomach drops when the last door reveals you sitting across from the white-haired man he recognizes as Gojo Satoru.

Their eyes turn to you, yours widening in shock.

“Toji-”

Unwelcome betrayal floods his heart as he steels his expression into one of an ice cold glacier.

“I’m no relationship expert,” Toji cuts with venom. “But even I know it’s bad taste to be meeting with an ex behind your husband’s back, don’tcha think, sweetheart?”

“Toji, it’s not what you think-”

“Then you wanna explain what the fuck is going on here?”

“Well, I think it’s pretty self explanatory, no, Zenin?” Gojo drawls, lips curling into a smirk.

Tojis eyes narrow. If looks could kill.

“You,” he points to you. “Come with me.”

“Toji, I can’t…”

He’s incredulous. “Don’t you think you owe me an explanation?”

“I was under the impression that her parents explained everything pretty clearly yesterday,” Gojo shrugs.

“Satoru, please,” you say to him.

“‘Satoru’?”

You look at him with wide eyes. It’s incriminating.

“So it’s true then. You knew everything?” Toji asks, but it comes out like a statement. “Come. here.” he grits out to you. It’s the last chance he would give you.

You don’t take it, only looking down. In a small voice, you mutter, “I can’t. Our parents will be back any second.”

“Oh for fucks sake, forget about your parents for one fucking minute will you?”

“I… I can’t, Toji. Maybe you’re used to doing that with your family, but I can’t disobey mine like that.”

So you’re choosing them over me? He wants to demand of you. But his pride stops him. He won’t beg. He certainly won’t be doing that in front of Gojo Satoru. He takes a few steps back, as if physically putting some distance between you would make this better.

That’s when he steps back into someone – your parents, along with the Gojo elders.

“Zenin Toji,” the Gojo head bellows. “What do you think you are doing here?”

He recovers quickly, lips curling into a smile that looks more like he’s baring his teeth. “Nothing much,” he feigns nonchalance. “Just thought I’d stop by to see what kinda schemes your snakey family has been up to. Never thought I’d see adultery added to that list though.”

“Toji-san-”

“Don’t worry, though. I’ll make this real easy for all of you.” He turns to you, addressing you in a cold tone he has never used on you before. “The papers will be waiting for you at home, my half signed. It’s not in my nature to stand in between two lovers, so I wish you all the best,” he spits the word lovers, before turning on his heel.

He forces himself to keep his strides even, even as he hears you shout his name.

The walk home does not cool his head. Inside the house, though it was only for a short while, he is reminded of you everywhere.

His expectations for his family had died years ago; there was no hope for that. From then on, he had trained himself to exercise the same doubt on all his relationships. Surely, if his own birth parents could not come to love him, there is no guarantee anyone else could.

With you, Toji had let his expectations of you, of your relationship, go unchecked. He had been tricked. You had always acted more of the victim in this, ever the sad, pitiful one. You had played the role so well that Toji was the one who felt guilty. And you took that weakness of his, placed your hands into the cracks to force open a chasm.

This entire time, Toji had thought you a pitiful, neglected daughter, desperate for love, forced into an unwanted marriage with someone you hated. It seems that in reality, the only crime inflicted upon you, was not being married, but rather being married to the wrong person.

He can only laugh at himself in scorn. He could remember giving you a lecture on the couch about how to give up on false hope and expectations for people who were bound to betray you – the irony of the situation. It seems he had been the one to harbor false hope this entire time. And like a fool, he had allowed his growing affection for you blind him, deluding himself into thinking you hold feelings for him too.

Toji signs the forms and leaves them in plain sight on the tea table.

Unable to stand another second in the space haunted with your touch, he flees, intending to keep away until every trace of you is gone.

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