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philliamwrites · 3 years

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Ocean Eyes, Golden Mind

Fandom: All For The Game (Nora Sakavic)

Pairing: Neil/Andrew

Tags: #math nerd neil, #neil with glasses, #no exy

Summary: In which Neil hates his new prescribed glasses until they attract the interest of a certain Andrew Minyard.

Commissioner: Ziegenkind

Notes: Title taken from Billie Eilish’s ‘Ocean Eyes.’

Ocean Eyes, Golden Mind

Dude, it’s just a frat party. Who doesn’t go to frat parties?

The message flashes Neil’s screen white, its sender none other than his roommate Nicky who is supposed to study for an upcoming test in Public Policy in exactly nineteen hours. That’s what Neil writes him. Nicky’s reply comes instantly.

Those who study tend not to party. You know. Like you.

Neil leaves him on read. If he wants to party, he’ll lock himself inside his room, two bottles of Jack Daniel’s by his side while watching every existing compilation of cats attacking people on the small screen of his phone. He knows how to have a good time, alright. Not everyone has to set their scale like Nicky: More than once Neil has been the spectator of him coming back to the dormitory completely wasted, but still eager enough to get frozen waffles from the fridge. Being too drunk to put them in the toaster, he usually just climbs up to his top bunk and puts them between his thighs to eat them partially defrosted. It’s this fragile line between genius and stupidity that has Neil doubting if he should fill in a request for changing roommates or just live with the fact that Nicky Hemmick is one special kind of man.

So instead of spending his night curled into himself, wall against his back and eyes on every stranger distributing awful shots, Neil sits at the Math Tutoring Centre on the west side of the campus and gives group tutoring sessions.

Math comes to Neil like breathing. Like Bertrand Russel said, not only does Mathematics possess truth, but supreme beauty—a beauty cold and austere, like that of a sculpture. It is sublimely pure, and capable of a stern perfection such as only the greatest art can show. It is poetry—elegant and deep—of logical ideas to create harmony in a written line. Once he tried to explain that to Nicky over microwaved Mac n Cheese with Girls running in the background, clearly overestimating him, because Nicky only stared into space for a few seconds, and replied, “You really need to get laid, man.”

Reluctant at the beginning, Neil only agreed to join the Tutor Program because his math professor promised to throw in some extra cash. Something about raising the graduate numbers in order to get the board of education off his back. That’s where Neil’s jurisdiction of interest ends, but he has enjoyed it more than expected—the empty hallways, the harsh light of the ceiling lamps, the smell of chalk, the faint echoes of students still lingering in classrooms. There’s this magic about the Palmetto State University at night—a vulnerability that can only live once the sun sets behind the horizon. When else would he find a kid sleeping under a table in the library, or seniors breaking down in tears for exact 10 minutes before continuing their studies as if nothing has happened.

There’s another reason he’d rather spend his evening on campus, one Nicky doesn’t need to know because then Neil won’t hear the end of it. That reason being 5’0’’ tall chemistry prodigy Andrew Minyard, sitting in the last row of Neil’s math sessions each Friday. He only knows about him thanks to Nicky’s never-ending complaints, but that never really stopped him from throwing a few or more glances in Andrew’s direction. Just curiosity, of course.

So when he stands in front of the blackboard now, putting away his lesson papers which are full of numbers and equations—the kind that has enough letters to look like sentences—he feels dozens eyes burn holes in the back of his neck, and one pair belongs to Andrew. No one asks why he’s here, but everyone knows he doesn’t need to be.

In his one year of giving tutoring sessions, Neil has learnt that exactly three types of students exist: Students who are really good, certainly not in need of the extra lessons, but going anyway for some extra ego-buff and unnecessary brain-flexing. The second type is students who are okay, doing their tasks, following the lesson, not really attracting any attention safe for some crude jokes. The last type has Neil questioning his belief in the educational system of the whole state because he doesn’t understand how they are allowed inside the sacred halls of PSU.

Andrew is a special type on his own—the enigma that keeps Neil awake at two in the morning because he’s desperate to solve it, but without knowing where to start, he’s just running in circles. His fingers itch to solve an equation with multiple variables, to find the solution to a problem and get it off his mind.

He doubts it will be this easy with Andrew.

“Before we continue to look at scalar products in R- and C-vector spaces, we’ll consider bilinear and semi-bilinear forms in general, and link them to matrices for their representation to chosen bases.” Neil’s hand flies across the board, leaving letters and parenthesizes that look like bizarre drawings—art in its most complex form. Once he’s finished, he takes a step away, wipes the chalk on his fingers off on his jeans, and turns to his audience. “What happens to this equation with the semi-bilinear form σ?”

Two hands shoot up immediately. He ignores them; no need to feed their ego, and instead picks a freshman who’s been staring at his phone for the last ten minutes. Making way, Neil moves back to the student’s seats and leans against a desk.

Is it the farthest place away from the board? It is.

Is it the closest that will get him to Andrew? Might be so.

It certainly gives him a good look at what Andrew’s been doing since Neil started—and that is not solving a single task on the paper Neil has handed out at the beginning of the session. Andrew, apparently bored before it even started, has taken out a slip of paper with a sudoku puzzle on it and is solving it against his leg, completely linked out of the instruction.

Neil tries not to stare too much at Andrew’s bare arms, and instead looks back at the board.

“Does that look right?” the freshman—Rhys or Rheeze or something like that—asks, turning around.

Neil narrows his eyes and squints at the board. He can’t make out a single thing, and that’s bad, yes, but his feet betray him, staying rooted where they are instead of reducing the distance until he can distinguish σ from a.

“Where does the l come from,” he asks. Multiple heads snap in his direction.

“That’s a j, Josten,” someone says from the other side of the room.

Neil squints harder. “And the u?”

“A μ.”

“No, it’s a v,” a girl next to Neil says, and that’s when the everyone starts shouting about what’s on the board and what isn’t.

Neil bears it for a solid minute before he surrenders. He pulls a small case from his pocket, opens it. Puts his glasses on.

The whole room goes silent.

Neil checks the equation, nods. “Correct. Who’s next?”

Multiple people stir, one manages to get up, and walks straight into a table leg. Neil questions that ‘straight’, because only then the freshman guy stops staring at Neil and steers his attention to the equation on the blackboard.

It was a bad idea, and Neil still hates Allison for forcing him to go. She’d dragged him to the doctor last week to get his eyes tested, annoyed by his never-ending questions of ‘What’s written there?’ or ‘Is that a six or an eight?’.

“They’re my eyes,” Neil had said, arms crossed as he sat in the office and waited for his turn.

“And it’s me who has to see your ugly squinting face,” Allison had replied.

Two hours later Neil had finally his prescriptions but that didn’t mean he was free from Allison’s clutches. He would have been fine with some glasses from the dollar store, but she insisted that if he’s going to wear them more than once a day, he should get designer glasses—thin frames and a color that matches his copper hair. She suggested gold. Neil picked black. The look of disappointment on Allison’s face was something that deserved its own painting to commemorate it. But once they’d finally chosen the right pair, she’d given him the very same look most of the students are giving him now—a mix between slight awe and disbelief as if he’s grown a second head. Or owes them all a month’s worth of lunch money.

“Well,” had Allison said at least, turning away to pack up and go home. “Tigers have their stripes. I have my eyeliner.” She threw him another scrutinizing look over her shoulder. “You have your glasses.” If it was supposed to make him feel better, it didn’t work, and right now he regrets nothing more than allowing Allison to drag him around.

Neil’s eyes land on Andrew’s sudoku puzzle, now half-hidden under his papers, and he sees now that he isn’t even solving the thing, but simply coloring in the empty squares.

He takes a second too long and meets Andrew’s eyes staring back at him.

“Problem, Josten?” Andrew asks with a blank expression, tapping the end of his pen against his monochrome picture of black and white squares.

Neil wants to see how far he can push until he walks against a brick wall and breaks something. He returns his gaze to the board but feels Andrew’s eyes like a solid touch on the back of his neck.

After the session, the students hurry outside, still throwing curious glances over their shoulders at Neil and if he could merge with the back of his chair and disappear forever, that would be totally okay. It isn’t until a shadow looms above him that he looks up from his own homework and draws in a careful breath when Andrew towers above him.

Neil raises an eyebrow. “Problem, Minyard?”

Andrew’s face gives nothing away, and when he stretches out a hand, Neil doesn’t flinch. His glasses slip off easily, held between Andrew’s thumb and index finger.

“Nicky told me he’s trying to convince you to join him tomorrow,” Andrew says. Neil needs a second, because that is the most words he’s heard out of Andrew’s mouth.

“I have no reason to go,” Neil says, his eyes jumping up and down, from the equation that makes his sight blur to Andrew leaning his slender waist against the table.

“You have one now.” It’s barely neutral enough to not sound like a threat, but Neil stares at Andrew nonetheless, and when he puts Neil’s glasses on, Neil’s heart does a weird stutter. He’s still starring at Andrew when he leaves the room, and no, his eyes don’t stray, they stay on Andrew’s broad back, and if they dip lower it’s because of the light.

Once he’s alone, Neil takes a deep breath, exhales slowly. Puts his head in his arms and counts to ten in French first, then again in German. His heart still does this weird thing, trying to bruise his ribs from the inside.

He gets his phone, texts Nicky he’ll go to the frat party tomorrow and puts it away, not interested in his roommate’s reply. There’s still the equation he needs to solve, but for the first time Neil’s heart isn’t really into math, and he is quite alright with it.

#philliamwrites #ao3 #fanfiction #aftg #andreil #andrew minyard #neil josten #all for the game #andrew x neil #neil x andrew #andrew/neil #neil/andrew

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suolasin · 5 years

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i can't stop thinking about ur kevin with a nosebleed and how goddamn pretty he is

thank u ! literally all i do with my life is try to figure out how to make kevin look prettier and prettier its kind of a life goal for me

#applies 2 seth too lets be real #ALSO I LOVE UR KEVIN ART TOO?!#ask #ziegenkind

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whatbutandreil · 5 years

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i had an ask sitting in my inbox for a couple of months bc i didn't really know what i wanted to say, but i lost the ask:/

unfortunately, when i tried to save my response to my drafts, tumblr just,, fuckin deleted it, so im sorry to whoever asked it:/ but i have my response now. the ask said "what(or who) got you into tfc?" to the person who asked this question, thank you. this has been a really great reflection. so uh,, here's my answer:

i kinda hate the way i came into tfc bc it was in a way that didn't respect the wishes of my, now friend on twitter, ziegenkind.

basically, i was scrolling on pinterest, as you do, and i fell into a hole of like,, gay fanart? (not a question, just a little self-reflection on how fucking queer i am. how did i not fucking know?)

anyway, so, i was scrolling, as you do, and i found @ziegenkind 's stunning painting of andrew and neil on the bottom bunk of the dorm bed (y'all know the one) and i was like "whooooo,, the fUCk are these two cuties (ʘ‿ʘ)??"

PSA : DONT REPOST PEOPLE'S ART WITHOUT THEIR PERMISSION, ESPECIALLY IF SOMEONE EXPLICITLY SAYS NOT TO. THIS COUNTS AS REPOSTING IF YOU POST SOMEONE ELSE'S ART TO PINTEREST, INSTAGRAM, TUMBLR, TWITTER, FACEBOOK, ANY SOCIAL MEDIA. DO NOT QRT PEOPLE'S ART ON TWITTER IF PEOPLE SAY NO. YOU ARE NO EXCEPTION. AND DONT FUCKING ERASE PEOPLE'S WATERMARKS AND DEFINITELY DONT REPLACE THEM WITH YOUR OWN. DONT FUCKING DO IT. to the lovely ziegenkind, (it's julian from twitter (^o^)丿) it's so fuckin unfortunate that i found your art through reposts and it's fucking horrible that people don't listen, but thank you for being my bridge into this fandom and im very grateful to have found you and been able to talk with such an angel. you quite literally changed my life forever and i can't thank you enough:') im eternally grateful for that. BUT DONT FUCKING REPOST DIPSHITS

anyway, so, naturally, i sat in my bed for 3 hours at 1am on a school night, as you do, scrolling through andreil fan art and trying to figure out who the fUCK they were and what they were from. i found tfc and immediately downloaded it on my phone

i didn't get to reading it for a bit tho:/ abt a week later, i was brought to the emergency room bc i was planning to kill myself. id been diagnosed with depression for around a year, who knows how long i was suffering before that, and i was hitting my lowest. it was abt 2 weeks after new years and on new years eve, i was planning on ending it bc i couldn't fathom dealing with it for another year. another year of feeling nothing or everything all at once. but my mom had called me downstairs to go to a new years party, so i didn't go through with it. abt 2 weeks later, i had seen my therapist again, and i was deflecting hard core, and she saw it, and she sent me to the ER. i was evaluated all night, but i wasn't kept for observation since i told the nurse that the thoughts had passed. i was taken out of school and put in an outpatient program where id have group for 4 hours and school for 2. every morning for abt a month, i would get picked up at my house in a minivan and id have a good 20-25+ min drive to program.

every. single. morning. on the van, i would read tfc. every morning. i was going through, what i thought to be the worst time of my life (i now know that it in fact DID get worse and now we're going on a new level of bad, but then it was the worst id experienced) every morning i was reading about neil and him running from his father, something ive wanted to do for years. reading about andrew struggling with depression and self harm like i am and despising most touches bc of people in his life that ruined it, similar to how someone ruined it for me and doesn't understand that "no" means "no". reading about nicky learning to love and accept himself for being gay, for being who he is like ive been trying to accept myself being a queer ace trans boy. reading about kevin trying to cope with his anxiety, even if it's in an unhealthy way, the same way i do. reading about renee growing up one way and wanting to become a better person, something that i want to do every day. reading abt matt overcoming his addiction and loving his friends with his whole heart. reading about dan standing up for herself and being proud of who she is. reading abt allison cutting away the people in her life who wanted to hold her back. reading about aaron and andrew work through their differences to try and salvage their relationship. reading about neil taking his life back and living it the way he wants, on his terms, like i so badly crave to do. reading about neil and andrew finding a respectful and loving relationship, one where all boundaries are respected, not crossed, where there is comfort in being together and a certain understanding on a level that others could never wrap their mind around. the kind of relationship that i have always, always, yearned for, where i feel safe and loved and respected.

these books taught me not only to die for the ones i love or kill for them, but to live for them, and to me, that is a much more daunting and difficult task.

All For the Game gave me hope, something i never thought id have again. it gave me hope for tomorrow. and the day after that. and a month after that. and it gives me hope that one day, i will get away from my father, i will be comfortable with who i am and love myself for it, i will find ways to cope with my anxiety properly, i will be proud of the person i have become, i will have friends who i love and who love me, i will stand up for myself and be proud to be the person ive become, i will surround myself with good people and cut away those who treat me wrong and hold me back, i will work to repair and maintain good relationships.

it gives me hope that i will finally break away from the pain and start to live my life the way i want, as the person i was meant to be, the way i was meant to live my life.

it gives me hope that i will overcome my depression, that i will find the strength to stop harming myself to cope, that i will find the strength to push through, even after ive been given every reason to just give up.

it gives me hope that one day, i will find a person who will love me for who i am, love me despite my past and the scars i carry, love me in a way that i'll never be able to explain or understand. that i will find someone who respects my boundaries, who asks "yes or no?" before touching me, who respects if i say "no" and still fucking loves me regardless. someone who can feel like they can be completely themself around me, and that i can feel the same around them. someone who will fall in love with me a little more every day. someone who i'll fall in love with a little more every day.

it gives me hope that one day, hopefully someday soon—but i think im willing to wait—i will be happy.

All For the Game quite literally changed to course of my life, and i can say with confidence that without it, i would not be here right now.

people say that books and shows and movies change there life all the time, but i know that i wouldn't be here without it. these books saved my fucking life. i wouldn't have experienced those mornings, walking into program with a goofy smile on my face, practically vibrating with what i now know was joy, blabbing to every person i ran into that morning abt a boy with scars and a sharp tongue on the run and the small, depressed and angry blond who told him to stay. or nights when i sobbed and sobbed for those boys who deserved better. and i wouldn't have gotten black armbands to cover my scars and match with my two biggest inspirations. or when i have a bad impulsive thought, i wouldnt have a voice in the back of my head going "what would andrew say? what would neil say?" and the vivid image of the small blond giving me a stare, face carefully blank, yet eyes swimming with a mix between disapproval and hope, and the boy covered in scars tentatively giving me a hug, a bit awkward at first, but he's a lovely hugger and eventually, awkwardness turns into comfort. without it, i don't think id know what pure, honest love is supposed to look like.

sorry, i suppose this got quite a bit off track from what got me into aftg, but once i started writing, i couldn't stop.

TLDR; i saw fanart on pinterest, DONT REPOST ART WITHOUT PERMISSION, and my life was saved and changed for the better by a book that i stumbled upon, purely by chance.

i don't believe in fate, but i do think that i found these books for a reason, and that my life changed because of it. i suppose you could call it the butterfly effect.

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chumpedkid · 5 years

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so!! @ziegenkind allowed me the absolute honor of commissioning them so i could get andrew tattooed in their style! i adore everything about their style so being able to have a unique piece of art of my favorite boy on me is.... i have no words for it really.

thank youuuuuuu zieg :’) 💜

#me #tattoos #@ziegenkind

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miseenplace-zine · 6 years

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Mise en Place iwaoi Zine!

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Preorders open from October 15 (11:59 pm CET) to November 15 (11:59 pm CET)

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Zine + six A6 sized RISO prints:

Paper zine put together by hand and with love.

An A5 sized (148mm x 210mm) art book, stitch bound, featuring 10 full colored illustrations and 10 doodle pages.

6 additional A6 sized RISO prints of some of the featured art work and one surprise recipe.

Artists:

+ @amalasdraws + @dahliadenoire + @dykearts + @hawberries + @jovaline + @keypyon + @marxandria + @toranator + @thispuppyflies + @ziegenkind +

For only 15 € + shipping! International shipping! World wide!

Order now HERE!

! LIMITED RUN!! Grab your copy as long as you can! !

_______________________________________________________________________

++ GIVEAWAY ++

! Reblog this preorder post and join our raffle to win one giveaway zine!

- one winner - must reblog - no giveaway blog - from October 15 to November 15

Winner will be announced on November 16. Good Luck!

#iwaoi #iwaoi zine #haikyuu!!#mise en place #preorders #zine #iwaizumi hajime #oikawa tooru

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ziegenkind094 · 6 months

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rewatching hq

#haikyuu #hinata shouyou #kageyama tobio #kagehina #hq art #ziegenkind art #hq

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aymmichurros · 5 years

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did something happen to ziegenkind do you know?? i came across a post with their art and the url said deactivated? i love their art and i dont know who to ask... i havent seen anything about it...

she said she was going to delete her tumblr and post more on twitter and instagram! follow her and keep showing her ur love -> (twitter) (instagram)

#replies #Anonymous

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fuzzballsheltiepants · 6 years

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The Shirt

In honor of @ziegenkind‘s amazing piece of art and the fantastic discourse surrounding it that I’ve been laughing about for the past day. Hope you enjoy.

“Damnit!” Allison stormed into the room and flung something in Dan’s general direction. Aaron gritted his teeth and curled further over his textbook. This was why he always studied at Katelyn’s. Fuck her roommate for having a birthday.

“What’s wrong?” Renee asked mildly.

“It doesn’t fit!”

Out of the corner of his eye, Aaron saw Dan hold up a black piece of fabric. Her eyes went wide as she looked at it. “Were you actually planning on wearing this?”

Allison perched on the arm of the couch. “You know my parents are coming for graduation.” Everybody nodded. “I wanted to see if I could actually make my mother faint if I pretended like I was going to wear it. But it’s too wide and too short.” She sighed. “No wonder it was on clearance.”

It was quiet for a moment and Aaron breathed a sigh of relief and turned back to his biochem. Then: “Maybe Andrew would wear it,” Matt said in a strangled voice. “What?” he asked, grinning, when everybody turned to look at him. “It’s black.”

Aaron swiveled in his chair and looked at the shirt. It was, in fact, black. It was also unmistakably a woman’s shirt. And there was a gap in the fabric strategically placed across the chest. He turned back to his homework, muttering, “He’d wear it.”

Not surprisingly, everybody ignored him. Nicky scoffed. “Maybe if Neil asked him, but no way he’d wear it on his own.”

“We could get Neil to ask him…” Dan said thoughtfully.

“No way,” Allison said, “the best part would be seeing Neil’s reaction. But it’s a moot point, Andrew would never wear a woman’s shirt. He’s not Nicky.”

“Hey!” Nicky protested. Everyone looked at him and he thought for a second before acquiescing. “Fair enough.”

Aaron sighed and spoke up louder. “He’d wear it.”

He was starting to wonder if he was both mute and invisible when everyone kept arguing as if he hadn’t spoken. Only Renee gave him a smile. “Okay okay okay,” Nicky said after a few more migraine-inducing moments. “What’s the pot?”

They all placed their bets. Renee sided with Aaron; Nicky, Allison, Dan and a reluctant Matt all bet against it. “We getting Kevin in on this?” Nicky asked.

“He’s with Neil right now, we can’t ask him,” Dan said. “Now who’s going to give the shirt to Andrew?”

Aaron got up and snatched the shirt off the couch. Going next door, he knocked, then knocked again. Andrew opened the door eventually and Aaron pushed past him into the room. “The assholes are betting you won’t wear this,” he said, tossing the shirt at Andrew. He snatched it out of the air and studied it. “They think your masculinity is too fragile, or whatever.”

Andrew’s face didn’t change, but Aaron saw the faint gleam in his eyes as he folded the shirt and tucked it under his arm. Aaron turned to go, pausing with his hand on the door handle. “They’re all going to be watching when Neil and Kevin get back tonight. They want to see Neil’s reaction.”

“You did not specify I had to wear it tonight,” was Andrew’s flat response. Aaron let his mouth twitch up faintly, and the gleam in Andrew’s eyes intensified.

*****

Weeks went by, with no evidence of the shirt. Aaron wondered if they should have set an end date on the bet. When the Trojans eliminated them in the semifinals, he was pretty sure he’d lost. Everyone else seemed to have forgotten altogether.

The morning after the loss, Wymack called them all in for a final meeting. Neil and Kevin ended up piling in the back of Matt’s truck to ride over. Matt sent them a questioning glance, but Neil just shrugged. Useless boy toy.

They all headed into the lounge en masse, the freshmen in the lead. When they stopped abruptly, the upperclassmen nearly piled into them. “What the fuck?” Jack said.

Neil weaseled his way through the mass of bodies and ducked through the door. Aaron saw his back go rigid and then relax before disappearing altogether. Jack still hadn’t moved, but the other freshmen seemed to get their wits about them and dissipate to their usual spots. Aaron ducked around Jack and finally saw what had the others in such a tizzy. He turned around to Dan and Nicky behind him. “You owe me,” he said, stepping out of the way so they could see.

Andrew was in his usual spot on the couch, one arm casually draped over the arm. The black shirt stretched across his chest, exposing a strip of skin. Neil stood, face slack, in front of him, oblivious to the rest of them now piling into the room. Aaron elbowed him in the back on the way to his chair.

He had to admit it was as amusing as the others had been imagining, seeing Neil at a loss for words. Andrew just looked up at him calmly, as if there was nothing out of the ordinary going on. Finally, Neil found his voice. “Where did you get that?” he asked, sinking down onto the couch between Andrew and a stoic-faced Kevin.

Andrew shrugged. Wymack came into the lounge, hesitated for the tiniest fraction of a second on seeing what was lounging on his couch, shook his head, and started his standard end-of-the-year tirade. It was virtually identical to the one from freshman year so Aaron tuned it out in favor of watching all his teammates staring at his brother. The freshmen, aside from Jack and Sheena, looked torn between confusion and awe. Nicky looked like he was going to piss himself with glee. Dan, Matt, and Allison all looked reluctantly impressed. Kevin seemed determined not to take his eyes off Wymack. Renee’s control was slipping, letting a tiny bit of smugness through; Aaron found himself liking her better for it. And Neil…

“Neil,” Wymack said.

“Yeah, Coach?” Neil answered, not taking his eyes off Andrew.

“Do you think you can stop staring at your boyfriend’s nipples for a minute? I’m trying to introduce you as captain.”

Neil turned to Wymack, face flushing. Andrew pinched his thigh in a gesture subtle enough Aaron doubted anyone else noticed. Wymack finished his speech with a voice strained from leashed amusement, Neil said a few words that for once were neither vicious nor stupid, and the season was finally, officially, at an end.

Aaron walked out first, quickly followed by everyone else. Kevin joined Aaron, Dan, and Matt at the truck. Matt looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

“I’ll ride back with you,” Kevin said. “I think Neil and Andrew may be a while.”

Matt and Dan laughed, and Aaron silently vowed to never, ever sit on that couch again.

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bloodydamnit · 5 years

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Hi! I was just wondering how old you are and how long you've been drawing. Also, what's one tip you'd give for beginners? Your work is beautiful, btw. 😁

hello there! I’m sorry it took me so long to respond! I’ve been drawing ever since I can remember. But I’ve really put a focus on studying it since high school. So about 10 years (holy shit wait what? fuck 10 years…)

A tip that I would give to beginners is literally, dont give up. I gave up so many times. Not really drawing, but in relation to digital art, i started my freshman year of high school. It was ‘too hard’ so I gave up and didn’t pick it back up again until the end of my junior year in college. I regret it so. fucking. much. If I stuck with it, I dont know where I would be now. And that missed potential makes me mad =-= But really. Don’t give up. It will get frustrating at times, but drawing is a SKILL. Talent comes with how easy concepts and the form comes to you. But drawing, painting, etc, is not a TALENT (not saying you don’t have talent. what i’m saying is, you put in the time and you WILL get results).

I learned how to draw in the old classical way. So pretty much, I took drawings from the ‘old masters’ and I fuckin copied them. Real figure drawings, I just copied and I did that over and over again until I got the hang of it. And that’s how the masters learnt how to draw. It has been the single most helpful thing that I have ever done.

Here are some master’s that I learnt from and copied:

Prud'hon

Mengs

Rubens

da Vinci

Raphael

these are all their drawings, you can very much do the same thing to learn how to paint. copy. copy. copy. copy. Now, I say copy the old masters because theyre fantastic to learn from - with a deep understanding of form and the body. I do not, however, recommend focusing heavily on contemporary, stylized, artists. The reason? They have their own style. you can of course learn from their style to create your own. but at least this way you are going right to the source!

The same thing goes for landcapes and still lifes. copy copy copy!!

and draw from LIFE. whats around you? draw it. see a person? draw it. i swear, the only reason why i learnt how to draw is because of studying from life and the old masters. (i think thats honestly why i cant fucking do anything ‘cartoony’. i am literally incapable. everything turns out realistic and i high key hate it but oh well. - i do know many people that this just helped them understand how to draw from life and they applied it to their own styles. i dont know why i hung onto mine tho =-= frustrating)

if you would like a more in-depth tutorial on how to draw a portrait, i would be happy to show step by step. i think there are a lot of tips that ive learnt along the way that help more than just ‘heres a circle. draw this line. draw another line’ and yadda yadda. i personally don’t learn that way, so maybe i can help someone else!!!

also, totally coping the idea from @ziegenkind after watching her lifestream (PLEASE GO WATCH HERS. ITS AMAZING. I FINALLY GOT TO WATCH ONE TODAY AND I WAS SCREAMING THE ENTIRE TIME AT HER GENIUS. and her music choice is fucking top tier, A+), but if anyone would like a livestream of me rendering or anything like that, let me know! since i get so many questions, i think that would be the easiest way to show yall how i do shit.

anyway this is longer than i intended lol. I HOPE THIS HELPS AND THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!

#goodmorningthisiskaia #drawing #tips #art

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ni3dade · 6 years

Photo

what about this bby boy nico?? the best hero in the entire serie??? i used @ziegenkind ‘s art as reference

#nico di angelo #pjo #hdo #hoo #Fanart #my art

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foxesrefuge · 7 years

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your were tagged ;D What do you think of Riko as a character inside the books? (no HCs) / Any fave HCs you want to share? / Any pairings/ships you like with him? / fic recs? / art recs? / Kevin&Riko - do they have/had feelings for each other? / Thoughts on his finale scene? / Did you read Nora's extra content? // tag other bloggers you think have something interesting to say about him! (maybe someone we don't know yet??) #Thoughts on Riko Moriyama

HOO boi XD here comes the trainwreck.First of..all thank you @c-valentino for tagging me and…. making me uh ..work and think on my own (sobs) haha *nervous laughter (noreally tho, thank you, целую!!)I probably won’tcome up with super new or hyper interesting stuff and… actually, Icould just link CVal’s whole post here……………………but okay here wego, then!!Ugh, I guess I have to out myself now real quickbefore we dive in: I was always kinda very interested in the ‘BadGuys’. No matter what, I’d try to find out more about them, try tofigure out how their twisted brains work and why their Morales werealways a bit questionable, which doesn’t necessarily mean I’m okaywith whatever they’re doing or understand and support their actions(hell fucking nooo).I’m just finding it super interesting tothink and sometimes even talk about.

Now, since that’s settled:I think Riko is justas interesting as our MC’s, if not one of the most interestingcharacters, and maybe also one of the most tragic ones (imo). I don’treally think you get this impression after reading the series for thefirst time, though. He seems super flat and not interesting enough inthe books. I wouldn’t have given him a second thought if I didn’t getthe chance to read the extra content.

Which leads me now to my actually toughts on Riko, based onextra Content and HC’s:The way Riko sees the world isobviously reeeally different from how our MC’s view the world,which is quite,.. understandable, regarding where he comes from, howhe was raised and trained and what he went through (bc hooo boi,that’s not a life I wanna live). This guy knows he’s the son ofExy, obviously The Number One and the actual King of the court. Thereshould be no way anyone could have the power or strength to outpacehim (oh and Riko is going to make sure of that). He is a Moriyama andthinks of his players as his property, he basically gets what hewants and who he wants. Sounds like a pleasant life, right? But Idon’t think he had one. He is living with this pressure form“above’, knowing that he always ‘has to be’ The Best of them all. Hehas to deliver otherwise he would be no use and therefore not worthkeeping in the nest, on the court and alive. I always picturedhim feeling the pressure and weirdly enough people tend to forgetthat Riko is not a robot… because being pressured like that,knowing you have to be THE BEST all the time, no matter what .. thatreally really really fucks with you and your brain. He isprobably under constant stress, giving more than just his best ,whichhe also expects from his players. There is no space for compassion,no place for weakness, nor failure. His live is Exy and there isnothing else than Exy keeping him alive. It’s his past, hispresent and his future for the rest of his life. His mentalbreakdowns always turn into violent outbursts because that boy can’treally cope with the mess in his head (probably not even aware ofthat) He never learned how to control his anger or himself. Why wouldhe? He is King, a Moriyama, he is the one controlling. So yeah, youbasically don’t want to be near him when he’s having his moments. Hisruthlessness makes him go overboard at times. A lot of times.He’salso never at fault. No matter what he does because.. what the hell??Such a concept doesn’t even exist. So how in the world is Rikoa tragic character, when we just settled that he’s nothing but anabsolute ruthless monster with no restrains???!!

Lemme explain ok. Riko was born into this world of Exy, Thesecond son, not the first(!!), growing up and having those insaneexpectations to life up to – he would be a worthless piecenothing, not needed on the court. He had Kevin, the brother who wasalways by his side, on and off court; his number 2, his property,*his*. Riko doesn’t know how to treat people right though,doesn’t know the concept of actual friendship, It’s always just Exyand Exy and Exy, there is no time for friendship. I also believethat he deep down feared for his life, he just wasn’t aware of thatbecause his brain was too occupied with getting better.One of myHC’s is that: he was super restless the whole damn time, not able tocalm down, constantly under pressure.He basically barely slept.How is there time for sleep, when you can use that precious time ondrills?It wrecks him. The nest destroyed a perfectly fineboy, gave him the chance to basically develop this crazy god complexand also turning him into this Exy monster. And most of the time hewasn’t even aware of his problems because there is just no time andspace for that shit.

Now what happens if one suddenly takes away his Exy? Welp,there’d be nothing left of this fucked up guy. He is a mess, abroken soul, not good enough to be alive.He has nothing, not evenhimself because he was sold to the court and owned by the court.There are many many many demons living in his ribcage, twistinghis brain in the worst ways. I’m not even sure if he’d be able tolive a normal human life outside the nest, without being able to feelanything besides the need to do better and better and better. It madehim mad to the point of no return … so yeah uh .. don’t you thinkthat’s kinda tragic??

Fave HC’s: Mhh, I uh … you know what?

basicallyeverything CVal came up with and mentioned in her post

…..…..(did u think I was joking, Val?)

Riko with freckles, I dig that!!

Riko playing an instrument.. preferably the piano (ok listen, just the picture of Riko, in a black suit … sitting in front of a piano…no?just me?ok)

Riko being an amazing swimmer

Also some Au’s

Riko and Ichirou → actually interacting with each other (Onii-san,y'all I’m chokiNG ( maybe some kind of Uchiha-Verse or something like that, why not? I dig it))

Fox!Riko ( @bvccvrdi thank you for this and @shihoran for destroying me and my emotions daily w this)

Pairings/Ships and Feelings:

Riko/Kevin clearly. There is no doubt.

Especially after reading the extra content and old drafts.Thesetwo were boyfriends. Their relationship was hella unhealthy and probsreally violent but … they just can’t live without each other(I mean can u imagine how obsessed Riko had been with Kev?? He wasHIS, okay? His and ooonly his.He didn’t even touch Kevin’s side of the room after all this time,can u imagine??). They were rivals for sure .. but .. they were alsoabsolutely obsessed w each other.I currently ship them likenothing else. Too invested. Even though I’m more than just conflictedabout this but I just cannot help it.

Thoughts on his final scene:….I have to admit thatI’m super unhappy with how the AFTG series ended. I’m glad to have ahappy end, couldn’t be more great full but everything feels so rushedand off. And I think it’s all due to Riko’s super quick death.Everything happened way too fast, I actually hate that he died, orspecifically how fast and easy that happened. It just didn’t fit atall, in my opinion.

Art Recs:

Give @shihoran a follow and you’ll be well supplied!!

And here are some other amazing pieces:

I ♔

II ♕

III ♖

IV ♗

V ♘

VI ♙

VII ♚

VIII ♛

IX ♜

X ♝

XI ♞

Fic Recs:

I haven’t really read that many, mainly because I know there aren’t that many. But here are a few I really liked

♥ what if i did MadHatterNO7

♠ Meant to be mine shihoran

♣ bvccardi’s Fox!Riko

I also know @c-valentino is working on something reeeeally really nice, y’all. So You better stay tuned, pumped and hyped!!! because I suRE AF AM!!!!

Everyone I’d love to hear from was already tagged, I believe. But whatevs, I’m going to mention y’all again. Feel free to ignore tho:

@shihoran @viviena @still-waiting-for-godot @bvccvrdi @ziegenkind @mochis-mullet

#thoughts on riko moriyama #I got tagged

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